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darkdevasofdestruction · 5 years ago

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Primum Non Nocere ~ Gregory House x Katrina Black

This may or may not be a personal fic I make for myself, that everyone is welcome to read in case they miss House or sth, so yeah, enjoy the clown fiesta.

There are many words that can describe Doctor Gregory House, all of them ranging from “Brilliant Doctor” to “The Biggest Asshole”...However, there is one person who ever called him “Sweet”, and each time, she got called insane.

Even Stacy, who dated him for so long, looked at her as if she suddenly became a chimera or something, which speaks volumes for his character as a whole.

It’s been 15 years since Katrina moved to America, and 15 years since she begged Lisa Cuddy to allow her to practice Medicine and learn directly from the hospital itself, even though she barely finished highschool and was beginning Medicine University.

Lisa had no reason to accept her, but she was much too sweet and convincing, doing everything asked, from cleaning, to nursing, helping her with management stuff, and then, as years passed, she started clinic duty and steadily, but fast-paced, she achieved her dream of becoming a successful cardiologist, going as far as becoming the new head of the department, since the old one retired.

Just as expected, she became friends with Lisa, James and Greg very easily, and each of them treated her in their own way - As her mother, as her confidant...And as her Mentor, of sorts - As Gregory House was the harshest and biggest jerk in the world, but not even the coldest man alive could resist her weirdly innocent charm.

She was the one to remember the gruff man’s every birthday and give him gifts she made herself - Nothing big, but always meaningful, like a winter scarf, or cute little decorations, engraved medical things and so one - And of course, on every Christmas, apart from gifts, she would bring him marshmallow hot chocolate and other festive decorations for his office, so he won’t feel lonely or bad.

Sometimes he didn’t even realise it, but every time he needed a proper diagnostic opinion, or his interns screwed up, he’d page her, not exactly caring if she was busy with clinic work or with an important surgery, and he’d make fun of her for rushing for “No reason”.

Life is definitely difficult for a shy, young foreigner, all alone in the world, but somehow, with the help of this few people, she managed to find something that she lacked her whole childhood - A true “Family” and a place to call “Home”.

But for Gregory House, this woman, Katrina Black, has always been an enigma he couldn’t deduct - The greatest mystery that crossed his path - He wanted to know her, to understand her, to learn about her and her pain and maybe, for once, he won’t feel as miserable.

The past 5 years especially, after Stacy left him and he ultimately had to live in pain, addicted to pain killers, and while he got more and more bitter, he also began to appreciate, at least in his heart, the unconditional kindness and attention he receives from her

And so, here we are, 15 years after the moment that changed everything in their lives...

“It’s not inflammatory process. It’s not a clot, because Chase’s angio says so. And it’s not cancer, because her tush is perfect. Anybody else got an Aunt Elyssa with weird stuff?” House limped into his office, looking at the three subordinates that were sitting around aimlessly. “...Maybe it’s worth looking into-” Cameron began, but was quickly cut off by the elder one, who looked at the angio once again. “I though you said Carly’s angio was clean.” Gregory blinked, putting both angiograms on the board for a better peripheral view. “It WAS clean.” the Aussie insisted again. “You guys see the problem here?” House asked in his usual over the top way. “There’s no indication of any abnormalities, no lesions, no spurs, no mastis-” Foreman got up to get a better look at the pictures better. “Well, if you guys don’t know, how about I call for the help of our lovely foreigner? I bet she’s gonna be angry for getting her out of whatever surgery she has, but...It’s in the name of science, after all!” he gave a mocking smirk at the trio as he hit CodeRed on the pager.

As expected, it didn’t take long for the girl to arrive, despite being in full surgical outfit, blood still on her gloves and her scrub cover, panting from having to run all the way there.

“What happened?! Are you okay?!” she tried to speak, despite barely being able to catch her breath. “Nothing really. Nothing that would result in the immediate death of a patient, clearly, and as you can see, I’m perfectly fine as well. Why ever would you hurry up like that out of a surgery?” Gregory fooled around, watching the crestfallen expression on her face, as she took off her gloves and scrub covers, revealing the cute and childish green scrub that had foxes on the top. It was her signature style, really - Always wearing the cutest, most childish scrubs, with various animals or flowers, and she was the only one who did that, despite her age, and didn’t care about anyone’s opinions. In fact, others kinda found it pretty nice too, almost giving off a more light and hopeful approach to a hospital. “So...Let me get this straight...I was in the middle of an open heart surgery...And you paged me while I was stitching it back together...With a code red, nonetheless...And I put my subordinate to cover for me, thinking that something happened to you or whatever patient you have...And instead, I find you here with no problem, loitering around with the three stoogies - No offense -...Having a party. Woaw, Greg, be careful, you are overshadowing yourself with every passing day.” Katrina groaned, throwing in the bin the discardable surgery objects and hopped on his desk, crossing her legs together nonchalantly. “Awwww, you love me, don’t you?” he retorted in a fake sweet tone, making the girl shake her head and chuckle. “Yeah, of course, who doesn’t?” she could barely keep herself from grinning at his silly self. “So what’s the real problem? What did they do?” “We are trying to see what’s wrong with Carly’s angiogram, and I figured perhaps the gorgeous eyes of an exotic, successful, intelligent woman, would be able to see the problem of another successful and intelligent woman.” he tried to speak with more honey than he ever did, just for the laughs. “The girl kissed by fire should dye her hair again. Also...It came to my understanding that most people have...A left and a right leg, right? Why does the angio have two left feet?” she asked, taking her hair out of the ponytail and messing it around. “Et voila! Without even knowing the patient’s problems properly, you saw the wrong when these guys didn’t. See, I told you the foreigner would get it faster than you.” House limped back to pat her head, looking at the three with judgement. “So...Who screwed up something so basic? I wouldn’t have expected someone that works under you to do such a stupid mistake -... No, wait, it was Chase, wasn’t it?” Kat smirked, looking at the Aussie with a playful glint in her eyes. “Wh-What?! Why did you think it was me?!” Chase looked at her with revolt. “Are you trying to tell me it WASN’T you?” she pressed on, watching him blink and get back in his chair. “How did you know?” Greg challenged her, only to see her shrug. “He seems like the only one to screw up something like this because he was trying to charm the pants off some nurse.” she spoke as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “You are absolutely correct! Oh, and, stop messing with your hair, you’re leaving strands everywhere.” he grabbed her wrists, and just for a split second, his beautiful icy blue eyes peered into her fawn-like green ones. “Well...Every fire has cinders and ambers, doesn’t it. Now that you basically dragged me out of the surgery room, you have to keep me around for the case. I’m sure you wouldn’t mind me purrrowling around, would you?” she joked around, just as Chase got up, staring at the angios he screwed up in complete disbelief. “Yeah. Sure. You do that. At least I’ll have someone competent around.” he nodded his head, a bit awkwardly. “That’s impossible! It can’t be - “ Chase tried to defend himself, despite having no excuse. “Or maybe it was Jenny. How come some resident signed this radiology report? Were you even in the room?” House reprimanded the blond doctor. “I’ll redo her angio- “ Chase tried to defend himself, but was quickly shut down by his superior. “You’ll do nothing!” an angry House was a scary House, which made the room atmosphere tense as hell. “Eric, go do the angiogram, please.” Kat muttered, simplifying the problem. “...I can’t believe I did that.” Chase turned around to look at his fuck up, making the red haired girl sigh. “That’s what happens when you think with the wrong head at the wrong time.” with that, she flapped her hand to dismiss both of them, dragging House to sit down, worrying about his leg. “I am surrounded by idiots.” he dragged a hand down his face in anger. “Yeah, I know what you mean...But they are not stupid, in the long run. Just...Distracted sometimes...At the wrong times, sure, but...They have redeeming qualities too.” she tried to defend them a bit, while also calm him down, knowing very well that nobody can think straight while angry. “Yeah, I know. But neither you, nor I, have ever been distracted by trivial things like this. Speaks volumes about someone’s priorities.” he retorted just as tauntingly as before. “Well...He’s still young...And he knows he’s attractive for most people...I don’t know. I can’t really defend him for this one.” she looked down, sighing. “Then don’t. It’s not your job to defend everyone or try to make me feel better. Look at you. You’re young, beautiful and smart, but not once did I see you being distracted by some boy. Chase has no excuse.” he cut her off, making her smile in understanding, nodding blankly. “Yeah...But you’re the only one who sees me that way. You...And James and Lisa...You’re the only ones that I trust to tell me the truth and be genuine with me...And you’re the only ones who talk to me or hang around me without wanting something out of me. Sometimes things are more complicated than you see at the surface.” her voice became softer, almost melancholic, something that was completely out of character for her, or at least, that’s what he thought.

House was about to open his mouth and interrogate her, in his own weird way, only for his office room to get opened and have Vogler and Cuddy walk right through. With an ever so quiet curse from the girl, she bit her lip and raised her head, trying not to look worried or intimidated.

“What a pleasant coincidence, finding both of you here. I see neither of you conformed to the rules yet. Are you trying to have an anarchy together? Not wearing proper clothing?” Vogler look down at the two of them, which made House blink in confusion at the girl sitting on his desk. “Well, I know I don’t wear a coat ‘cause it’s itchy and tacky...But as far as I’m aware, if my eyes haven’t gone wild from the LSD, Katrina’s wearing a medical scrub.” the man started playing with his cane, only to see the girl shoot him a warning look, mouthing for him to shut up. “Animal scrubs are unprofessional. Nobody in the hospital wears them, and there is no benefit to them.” the businessman refuted with ease. “The benefit is that I make them myself, they are comfy, and people find them nice to look at. My patients feel calmer and more reassured seeing cute things. It makes them see past their health issues, even by a few seconds. And children and teenagers especially love it.” the girl explained herself calmly, before biting her lip and speaking a bit lower. “I’d recommend you wear a cute scrub too, I’m sure they are more comfy than your business suits. Maybe you’ll lighten up and realise we are in a hospital and we work with people, not with documents and money.” “Haha, you’re pretty funny. Now I see why the two of you are always together. You have a knack for breaking the rules. Or, better said, you completely disregard the rules as if they don’t exist at all for you.” Vogler’s voice seemed to get darker and more threatening. “It’s just a coat and a scrub. House works from his office, and he wears suits, I don’t see how that’s a problem, the same as my scrubs, there’s no rule anywhere saying I am strictly forbidden from wearing cute tops. Do you really feel your authority so undermined by two people in this huge hospital wearing different things, despite not getting in the way of their pristine perfect work? Or perhaps you feel some kind of weird...Inferiority complex that you must hide and keep in check by walking all over everyone as if we are doormats?” Katrina spoke without even looking at anyone, only staring ahead, coincidently, at the messed up angiograms, and for a few seconds, she could almost feel her own legs getting screwed up from the malicious vibe emanating from the businessman. “Katrina...” Lisa brought her out from her trance, sharing a look of worry together, knowing very well they’re screwed either way. “It’s not about what rules are out there or not. It’s about the rules that I make, and making sure you are team players. If you are not, then...I believe we won’t be able to cooperate for much longer. Especially if Dr. Cuddy isn’t able to keep you in control.” Vogler threatened, before turning away and leaving, while Lisa gave her a pitiful look, following behind him. “...Fantastic day, isn’t it?” Katrina put her hands on her face, sighing in frustration. “Do you really make your own scrubs?” Greg asked, making her turn her head to look at him, before nodding. “Yeah. Want one? I can make you a pink one with lots of flowers and smiley faces.” she joked half-heartedly, which made him realise the annoying businessman was affecting her more than him. “Don’t be ridiculous.” he shook his head, getting up, patting her head. “What else do I have left after what just happened.” she stretched, cracking her fingers and spine, as she hopped off the desk, just as her pager started ringing. “Good luck with your patient, Greg. I have to go. If anything happens, page me...But no code red during surgery this time, please.” she gave him a tender smile, leaving the room, making him look after her.

What was it about her today that made her seem off? It has to be only Vogler, right? What else could it be. The patient, however, has many many symptoms, and no actual disease yet. Fascinating!

As time passed and he got to treat his patient, and even lied to the transplant committee so Carly would get a new heart, and nobody, except for Wilson and Black, who were there, knew about that felony he committed.

On the other hand, during this time, Katrina has been working day and night with barely any rest, other than the tons of coffee she had to down to keep herself awake. There was something very uplifting about overworking, and no, not only your heart rate.

“Hey, Kat.” Wilson raised his hand up to salute his friend, which made her stop in front of him, albeit a bit spazzic like a meerkat, but nothing too out of the ordinary. “Hey, James, how are you?” she smiled at him, walking slowly together to whatever place he was heading to. “Pretty good. Wanted to grab lunch, how about you?” he asked politely, putting his hands in his coat pockets. “It’s lunch already? How time flies...I forgot to eat again. Too bad.” she chuckled sheepishly, grinning at him. “Anyway, have a great meal, I have a surgery to prep for.” “You should still eat something, you can’t live on coffee alone.” James muttered with concern. “Thank you for your concern, James, I appreciate it. I have to hurry now, eat for me too.” she chuckled, stopping in her tracks, waving him goodbye. “Wait, hold up, I wanted to ask you something.” he stepped closer to her, bending a bit so he could speak without anyone lese hearing. “Do you know what House lied about? At the committee? I know he lied, but I don’t know what about.” he asked, making the girl sigh and shake her head. “No, sorry, I don’t know. If you want, I can ask him when I’m done with the surgery.” she suggested, seemingly interested herself. “If he tells you, that would be great. He seemed to stop himself from telling me because I am a member of both the board and the transplant committee...Which you are as well. Good luck.” he points out, both curious and frustrated with his friend. “Well that’s interesting...Okay, you’ve got me hooked, I’ll see what I can do and I’ll tell you as soon as I find out. Laters.” Kat winked at him, rushing to do the surgery.

However, she didn’t have to do much work, for when she was almost done with the surgery, House himself made his way into the room, examining her working, before speaking.

“How would you fancy dinner tonight?” he asked, which made her look at him, raising her eyebrow in confusion. “Did you talk to James by chance?” she questioned right back, doing the finishing touches. “Yeah, how’d you know?” he asked jokingly. “Oh, you know...Just the usual thing of me forgetting to take care of myself. So, where do we go?” she asked, finishing the sewing and turning around to exit the room. “My home. We get take out, fall asleep since it’s already past midnight...I came with the motorcycle, I even brought your cat helmet, come on, I’m hungry, don’t question so much.” he put his arm around her shoulder, bringing her to the parking spot. “No room to complain much, is there? Is it really past midnight? I feel like I just talked with James a little ago...” she muttered, taking the helmet and putting it on. “Time flies fast when you’re having fun, they say.” House pointed out, starting the engine.

For the rest of the night - Or early morning rather - They finished eating and were relaxing by the piano, playing “My Way” by Frank Sinatra and other fun, classical, beautiful songs, humming the lyrics and reveling in the fact that there were no cases for a while, and no worries, at least for what Vogler is worth.

“Say, mind if I ask you something?” Kat asked, turning her head to look at him. “Yes, a hooker came by just yesterday, how did you know?” he gasped dramatically, looking right back at her. “Oh, just a lucky guess. However, my question was going to point more towards the patient you just had, who needed a heart transplant. I and James were curious about your little white lie.” she chuckled at his jokes, which made him blink at her and frown. “Sorry, doctor-patient confidentiality makes me unable to say anything. As well as ethics. Those are very important rules that everyone must follow for a better place to live in, don’t you think?” she never really understood why, but those back and forth playful banters always made her laugh. “Oh yes, of course...Ethics...How could I possible forget about Ethics? Perhaps you have a dictionary so I can look it up once in a while. And now, for the real reason...I can assume it was something psychological? Some mental illness that nobody was supposed to know about?” she smirked right back at him, only for him to look at her for a brief few seconds and nod abruptly. “Bulimia and self-harm.” Greg answered, which made the girl smile sadly. “Figured it would be something like this...Many women like her have self-issues and they get desperate and lonely to the point where they find the only relief from stress and self-hatred in overworking and terrible coping mechanisms. Buuuut she proved to you she wanted to live, and you fought for her and saved her. That’s amazing. You...You are amazing, you know that, don’t you?” she praised him, a soft smile on her face of something that may or may not resemble admiration. “Where are you getting at with that? It’s almost like you’re praising her...For something.” his voice lowered a bit, almost as if he was interrogating her. “Praise is a big word...Although she is a great woman, without a doubt. I was actually praising you, above all else...And...I was just wondering...Would you...Would you do the same for me? Should I have been in the same position as she was.” she asked, as a matter of fact, which made the other doctor raise his eyebrow at her. “Why would you be asking something like that?” it was clear that by now, the atmosphere got a little bit tense, until she started randomly playing “Carol of the Bells”, such a beautiful, uplifting Christmas song, yet House could almost smell the nostalgic undertones it had. “You are being very weird, Katrina.” “Oh, come on, lighten up, it was only to satisfy my scientific curiosities. Christmas is coming, I haven’t slept in two days, I’ve been drinking so much coffee that I think I’ve transcended into another universe altogether...And everyone is weird in their own way, you can’t tell me otherwise. Now come on, answer me, don’t be such a killjoy.” she grinned, nudging him playfully with her shoulder as she got closer to him, trying to get him to stop thinking it was some greater problem. “...No.” he answered solemnly, which made the girl blink and tilt her head to the side like a confused puppy. “No...You won’t do the same for me, or No...You won’t answer?” Kat asked softly, hoping to get a straight answer out of him, but that’s never the case with House. “Figure that out when you go to sleep tonight. Good night, Kat.” Greg said, getting up from the piano and making his way to his dormitory, leaving the girl alone.

Sighing, she continued to play “Summertime” from Gershwin to calm herself down, before getting up herself and walking all the way to her home, albeit not a long walk, yet still relaxing thanks to the cold outside that relaxed her.

The next day, Katrina walked in around the clinic with her big Triple Espresso Caramel Latte cup, going around to do her clinic duty, only to get paged by House once again, most likely to help with another diagnostic, or point out some obvious idiocy one of his subordinates has done.

On the way there, she spotted the big bad wolf, so she hid behind numerous people and quickly ran up the emergency stairs to escape her fate, until she got to the diagnostician’s office, catching her breath.

“Why did you run? There was no code red this time.” he asked, wagging his cane around. “Yeah, well, code V from Vendetta spotted me, so I had to pretend I didn’t see him. The emergency stairs are a blessing, sometimes.” she chuckled, leaning, on the glass wall, taking big sips from her coffee. “Have you thought about what I said last night?” he asked, and by then, the eyes of the onlookers seemed to go back and forth between those two. “I would have...But as you can see, I didn’t exactly sleep last night. Again.” she gave him a sarcastic, exaggerated grin. “Yeah, I can see that. You look dreadful. Do you make it your personal mission to go in the Record book for the idiot who refused to sleep the longest?” he limped in front of her, making her sigh and roll her eyes. “It wasn’t for lack of trying, okay? I go to bed, it takes hours to fall asleep, and when I do, I have nightmares and sleep paralysis, I wake up startled and restless, and there is that, I can’t fall asleep back again because of overwhelming anxiety. Are you happy with my answer?” she looked up at him with an almost annoyed look in her exhausted eyes. “...Nope.” House dragged his answer a bit, as if he was thinking over some rationalisation of her behaviour. “Are you taking pills?” he asked again, popping a Vicodin pill. “Uh...Should I?” she muttered, blinking questioningly at him. “Maybe. If you don’t already. I’m not entirely sure if you are or not, unless you tell me.” he pointed out as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Or maybe I need a long vacation in the Maldives. Or to go back home in Europe. Who knows, maybe sleeping in the Sun, on a beach chair, hearing the ocean waves would prove to be a great way to fall asleep and actually...You know...Sleep!” she shrugged and turned around to leave, but he hooked the semi-circle part of his cane around her neck, bringing her back, making her yelp in shock. “Are you sure you’re alright? You’ve been acting off recently.” he limped in front of her, blocking the exit. “Ah, yes, of course. An anomaly in an otherwise boring human who is bound by routines. How could I forget how much you love solving these anomalies? But, you see, I’m not your patient, so I have to ask you to refrain from trying to diagnose me, and return to whatever your guy has.” she tried to push him away, but he wouldn’t budge, which only made her sigh in aggravation. “I think...You are hiding something.” House pushed her with his cane just enough to look at her better. “Yeah, you’ve got me. Something completely unexpected...Like...Vogler giving me a hard time and threatening to fire me, despite being the head of the Cardiology department...And Christmas is approaching and I’m as lonely as always...Oh, and, how could I forget, my family wants to visit. My family. Who hasn’t contacted me in like 15 years. Suddenly wants to visit me. I’m SURE they want to have a very nice, lovely chat with me. Now that you know how miserable my days have been lately, can I go back to being miserable in my own department, where I can actually do something productive with my time?” it wasn’t often when she got so worked up, but it was clear she was stressed out and needed some way to vent or relax. “Don’t you want to know the answer to your question?” he looked down for a few seconds, before looking in her eyes, noticing how her eyes were puffy and droopy, and her bottom lip was quivering lightly. “...I don’t know.” she muttered, moving past him and going back to the clinic to do her job as she’s supposed to.

Of course, Vogle continued to be a problem for everyone, Christmas passed and she was just as lonely as every other year, so she drunk herself to sleep while listening to old school songs from her native country, because no matter how silly they were, they still made her feel happy and nostalgic.

Things continued to go array for everyone in the hospital, so bad and so hard that the evil businessman called for a board meeting to fire House, which caused a shit ton of problems for everyone, especially Kat, Wilson and Cuddy...But the only ones who refused were the first two, which escalated to another meeting right then to fire them...On her own birthday, barely a week and a half after Christmas.

“Doctor Wilson, Doctor Black. I was hoping you were gonna miss this one.” Vogler said as soon as the two entered the office room and sat on their chairs next to each other. “A man is the sum of his actions. Here are a few of Dr. House’s. He violated a D.N.R. and was charged with assault. He brought a termite into the O.R. and spat on a surgeon. He accepted a Corvette from a patient who was a known member of the New Jersey Mafia.” the businessman began, only to get stopped by one of the surgeons. “Ed, look-” he tried to reason, but was harshly cut off. “Edward.” Vogler looked sharply at him. “Edward. You look at anyone’s career, you can find things that are-” the surgeon began to speak again, only to get quickly shut down. “These are the last 3 months! He’s personally had more complaints filed against him than any department in this hospital.” Vogler continued, and James tried to reason this time. “Okay. He’s screwed-up. He’s miserable. And he should probably re-read the ethics code, but it works for him. He’s saved hundreds of lives.” Wilson explained, but it was clear Vogler was on a war path. “He is a drug addict who flaunts his addiction and refuses to get treatment! He is a disgrace and an embarrassment to this hospital.” this statement made the red haired girl groan in annoyance and let herself fall back on the chair. “No, he’s not a drug addict, that’s what YOU want to see. How would you feel if your leg was in excruciating pain because of a surgery choice you had NO choice over, and yet, you still had to work, save lives, and think properly? House MAY look like he’s some kind of insane jerk, but he is known all over America for being THE best diagnostician and was able to save people that otherwise, in the hand of ordinary doctors, would have died. Oh, and, those complaints have always been revoked or solved once the patient...You know...LIVED! You just want him fired ‘cause he’s not being your obedient lap dog. If you are so brave to speak ill of a person when he’s not around, why don’t you also have the guts to speak the truth?” she leaned forward to glare at her enemy, as Wilson put his hand over hers, trying to calm her down. “Says the one who’s always by his side, helping him indulge in his nefarious medical fantasies. Let’s keep this simple. Either he goes, or I go.” Vogler spoke, making Katrina rest her chin on her hand, watching him closely. “You shouldn’t personalise this.” Lisa tried to reason, but this guy was over the limits. “And by I, I mean my hundred million dollars. How’s that for personalising?” he started at poor Lisa, who was in a huge dilemma. “Who knew adults could be so petty? You give us money for a reason, and then you threaten to take it away because one doctor, the only one who cares about his patients more than anything, does his job as he is supposed to. Very mature.” Kat sneered at him, rolling her eyes at him. “Gregory House is a symbol of everything wrong with the health care industry. Waste. Insubordination. Doctors preening like they’re kind, and the hospital is their own private fiefdom. Health care is a business, I’m gonna run it like one. I hereby move to revoke the tenure of Dr. Gregory House and terminate his employment at this hospital, effective immediately.” Vogler declared, which made the red head jump up from her seat and slam her hand on the desk. “Since when can you decide for everyone? Are you some sort of God or what? You are WRONG Ed. First of all, Gregory House is the ONLY doctor in this hospital who is capable of being perfectly objective and save ALL his patients, even from the weirdest, most unexpected diseases! Secondly, yeah, we ARE Gods, in a way! We actively get ourselves in the line to save hundreds of lives, we...We HOLD their fates in OUR hands! He is not the problem, and Health Care is NOT supposed to be a business! This is not a business corporate, this is a HOSPITAL! A place where we, DOCTORS, save lives! You wouldn’t get it, you’re not a doctor! You didn’t have to see people in agony, begging to be killed, nor did you have people crying in happiness for being saved! You know absolutely NOTHING of medicine! You have NO right to fire Gregory House, just like you have NO right to tell us, who spent over 10 years of our youth studying constantly, and more than 10 years having this healthcare as our everyday life style, that we should do this for money, and not for the people!” the room went silent from the shock of her outburst, since nobody, in 15 years, saw her so agitated, and yet, she was right...Against the wrong man. “Fascinating and touching speech, I must say. Now I know what I have to deal with. Now then, let’s resume to our votes. All in favour of firing Dr. Gregory House?” Vogler asked, cheekily raising his own hand, which was slowly followed by everyone, except for Katrina and James, who looked at each other with worry, letting their arms fall back from the table and holding hands for comfort. “Dr. Wilson? Dr. Black?” Vogler tried to nudge to give in, but it was for naught. “Opposed.” both of them answered in unison, knowing that either way, they’re screwed. “The...Motion is defeated.” the business man sighed, letting silence hang in for a few seconds, before speaking again, in a chirper voice. “Dr. Wilson, Dr. Black, would you mind leaving the room, please?” “Excuse me?” James asked, frowning in confusion at his words. “We’re going to take another vote.” Vogler explained, as if it was nothing. “We are board members. We have to be here when you vote. You can’t void our votes by making us stand in the hallway. And, as far as I’m aware, you need notice and at least one business day before you can reconsider any matter.” James continued, knowing very well that he can’t prolong the agony. “We’re voting on a different matter, which you are conflicted out of.” Vogler stood up, looking solemn over everyone. “How can we be conflicted out of? What is that even supposed to mean?” Katrina asked, looking at Lisa, who seemed to have an apologetic look on her face. “This vote is whether to dismiss Dr. James Wilson and Katrina Black.” everyone looked down hearing that...Katrina and James were a completely different matter, compared to House... “Oh, great, yes, fire everyone who is speaking the truth and doesn’t go by your stupid business idea. Newsflash, not everybody is a greedy fuckass like you are. Some of us are here because that’s why we wasted our life for! Saving! LIVES! If you guys, after so many years of working together, think that I and Wilson should leave, then fine, sure, vote yes. But if you’re doing it because of this guy...Then congratulations, welcome to communism. Trust me, I’d know, I’m Romanian.” looking with disgust at that guy, she grabbed her friend and left the office without another word, and when they got far enough, she slammed her back on a wall, pulling at her hair. “At least I know why House likes you. You were right. You have always been an admirable doctor. I hope one day he will appreciate you as he should. Its not like he has many people who actually tolerate him...” James put his hands on her shoulders, trying to calm her out of having an anxiety attack, until Vogler came by, looking as menacing and narcissistic as usual.

He threatened both of them, saying they have the option of leaving the hospital, otherwise he will destroy them...Which means that there was at least one person who voted to keep them there.

There was no point in trying to comfort each other, so instead, they went to their own offices, packing up everything they owned. However, instead of packing, Katrina stood criss-crossed on her desk, looking at her prized possessions on the shelves, including her awards, diplomas, random little plants and flowers, cute decorations...And a fox that had a heart in its mouth, that she received as a gift from House, Wilson and Cuddy when she became the head of the Cardiology department.

She didn’t even realise how tears were falling down her face, she almost felt numb to it all, but in reality, her heart hurt like hell and she couldn’t imagine how life would continue to go on from now on.

The sound of the door softly opening was blocked away by her personal phone ringing, and with a lethargic move, she raised her phone, without looking at the caller ID, and answered.

“What do you want?” Kat sighed on the phone, not having the strength to fake cheerfulness as she usually did. “Oh, sweety, hi, how are you?” ...it was her mother...What a coincidence. “Why are you calling? You haven’t contacted me since I left the country. I’m not sure you realised the passing of time, but it’s been over 15 years.” the girl sneered over the phone, clutching her grip on it. “Don’t be like that, darling, I just wanted to see how my eldest daughter is doing! You see, we want to visit you tomorrow, and -” her mother began, but was quickly cut off by her daughter. “You’re in America?! Why in the world are you here?! You NEVER left the country!” her alarmed reaction was rightfully explained, as her mother only laughed fakely. “Well, you see, your sister is very sick and she needs organ transplants and...You are a perfect match! Your sister really, really needs your kidney, liver and heart, and -” of course the only reason she’d call is because she needed her... “You...Called...So that I would kill myself...And give my organs to your precious daughter...Because I don’t deserve to live, but she does...Sorry, you might not have been informed, I’m a stone cold bitch without a heart, and I’ve always been. If you want organs, beg to a transplant committee, otherwise, I’m not giving my life to some stupid bitch who thinks she’s better than me. Oh, and, by the way, in case you’ve forgotten, you already disowned me long ago, so there’s no reason for you to call anymore. And don’t call me to the funeral, I won’t come. Bye.” Kat aggressively slammed the phone lid close, before throwing it on the ground, putting her head on her hands and finally breaking down to cry...

But there were no tears.

There was only exhaustion.

“Hey.” the low voice of Doctor Gregory House echoed through the room which made the girl squeak in surprise and turn back to look at him with wide, frightened eyes. “Don’t you know it’s rude to sneak up on people?!” she accused him, clutching her blouse where her heart is supposed to be. “I knocked. You didn’t answer, I let myself in. I...See you’re not having the best day.” Greg pointed out, which only made the girl roll her eyes and turn back to look at her shelf. “Yeah, no kidding.” she snorted, her hands grasping her ankles as she looked down. “Why did you come here? Did Wilson tell you what happened and you came to throw some pity words and say how you saved the patient? If yes, then go ahead, I’m listening...As always.” she waved her hand around, urging him to talk and stop being so awkward, but the silence seemed to cut them with a laser. “...Thank you.” the words she never heard uttered from his mouth before shocked her so much that she turned around to look at him, holding the eye contact that she was barely able to hold with anyone. “You...You? Gregory House? Are...Thanking...Me? For what? You never thanked me for anything I did to you, so why the change of heart? Did Wilson’s golden tongue melt your heart and mellowed you?” she taunted him to get him talking, but his expression didn’t seem as harsh or condescending as it usually did, instead, he seemed to be...Almost apologetic? As if he realised that his actions of being himself hurt the people he cares about. “Do you hate me?” Greg asked, which made the girl frown and blink in confusion. “You...Think that I gave up the best thing I’ve ever had, which is my job here, because...I hated you? I loved this place because you were here...And James and Lisa...But now that it’s all over...What are the odds of someone hiring all three of us at once, and...Lisa miraculously becoming the head of another hospital and...Yeah, I’ve got nothing, it’s all ruined. Guess I can finally get a vacation. Anything else you want to say before I fuck off completely out of your life, just as you wanted to?” it was clear that she was exhausted and just wanted to go home and be herself with no more veil of lies covering her. “You...You are too good for jerks like me, Katrina. You should hate me. I repeatedly ruined your happiness time and time again.” House muttered, looking down at the floor. “Right...I’m sorry for caring about you, I guess...If that’s what you want me to say. Stupid Katrina, huh? Always caring about others and forget about herself. Always so miserable and helpless, but nobody seems to notice. Stupid, lonely Katrina, who has no friends and no relatives to care for her...Who only want her alive to donate all her organs to her sick sister and she can just die for all anyone cares. Now, thanks for telling me that I should hate the only person I actually gave a damn about and trusted whole-heartedly. You made your point, as usual, you want me out of your life, I will do just that. Have a not-so-miserable life from now on...At least you.” she wiped her face from the tears, waving her hand for him to leave her alone already, as she looked at shelves again and hugged the fox tightly to her chest, burying her face in it. “The answer is yes.” was the only thing House said as he left her office, his head hung, and for the first time in ages, he felt his own heart aching at the sight of the girl crying.

While he did as he usually does, spending all his time saving his patient, she drank herself to sleep, day and night, listening to sad songs, singing them at the top of her lungs, hoping it would be therapeutical, but at some point, she forgot what it meant to be properly rational, and she touched the forbidden stash she was never supposed to use.

And in the end, at whatever god forsaken hour of the early morning, she called someone, and dearly hoped they would answer. She had no idea why she called this person...Maybe because he was the first person in the calling list, or maybe there was some other underlying reason that she didn’t want to accept.

Apparently, being drunk out of your wits out on the terrace of her penthouse, while singing at the top of her lungs some silly or depressing Romanian songs, as outside was freezing cold and snowing heavily...But she didn’t feel the cold, despite how light she was dressed...It wasn’t enough make her feel something again.

“Katrina? Do you know what time it is?” a gruff, sleepy voice asked on the other end of the line. “N-No, not really. I wasn’t even sure who I called. Sorry.” she sighed, as she started to cry. “Are...You crying?” a rustle from the other side resembled House getting up rapidly from the bed. “I-I think so, y-yeah. I...I didn’t realise I was crying. I-I don’t even know why I called you.” she gasped, taking another shot of vodka mixed with chocolate bailey’s. “Are you drunk?!” House spoke in a higher voice, obviously shocked, putting on his coat. “You don’t even drink!...I’m coming over.” “N-No, y-you can’t! You can’t see me like this! And...And I have to know something very important from you! It’s VERY important! Life or death important!” she raised her voice into the phone, unkown to him, as she was fidgeting back and forth on the couch, which made House stop in his tracks just as he touched the door knob. “What is it?” he asked in a way so she would try to calm down. “D-Do you...Do you hate me?!” the desperation in her voice was something so foreign for him to experience, but something so usual for her. “What?! What’s that question, why in the world would I hate you?! Katrina, what did you do?!” he slammed the door shut, rushing towards his motorbike. “I NEED to know that! Just answer this simple question! Please, Greg, just answer!” her voice became more strained and desperate. “...Of course I don’t hate you. I couldn’t. Not you.” he sighed, getting up on his motorbike. “No matter what I did?” she started sobbing by now, which really worried the man. “Yes, of course, now hang in there, I’m gonna be there in a few minutes.” Greg put his phone on speaker, in his jacket, so he could still talk to her, as thankfully, their homes were pretty close to each other. “Greg...I-I’m...I’m afraid...I...I did something bad...Something very bad...” she turned around on the couch she was lying on, watching the sky as she shivered, snow falling on her, as she took another shot. “Katrina, I’m waiting at the elevator. What did you do?” House kept tapping his foot until that dreadfully slow elevator pinged, showing it got to the bottom floor, then got in, waiting to reach the pent house. “I...Took pills...” she muttered, clutching the box of pills. “How many?” he asked urgently. “I-I don’t know! I’m drunk, I’m hurting, I’m desperate, I’m lonely and I had a bottle of pills...One, two, three, four, five...And then it’s all blurry...But the bottle seems pretty empty...And I’m scared of an OD...” she explained over the phone, and then, she heard the front door slam close, and next thing she saw was a tall figure rushing in front of her, then he crashed on the couch on the terrace, and he pulled her to his chest, putting his jacket around her shoulders, his hands on her face, trying to warm her up. “You...Absolute...Idiot!” Greg scolded her, which only made her chuckle weakly. “I really am, aren’t I?” she said as more tears fell down her face. “You really don’t hate me, do you? Now that you know?” she clutched tightly to his Tshirt, as he could only sigh and hold her tightly. “No. I don’t hate you. I can’t...Now show me the pill bottle.” he told her, and suddenly, he felt her fall limp in his arms, just as she pointed to the empty, knocked down bottle of anti-drepressants. “What did you do...” Greg muttered in horror as he dragged her to the bathroom, getting her in the bathtub, completely dismissing his aching leg, as he used the shower tap to get warm water on her, while he made her vomit all the pills she downed, hoping she wouldn’t need to go to the hospital, and obviously, that nothing would happen to her.

For the whole night and morning, he didn’t move from there, only holding the girl, checking on her at regular intervals of time, making sure her vitals were still normal... Until she heard a string of incoherent mutters, begging him not to leave her alone and that she doesn’t want to to be away from him.

Oh, Kat, if only you knew what kind of effect you had on him...What kind of pain you were making him feel...The grief of being betrayed by Stacy, the one he thought was the love of his life, and then the painful leg...And now you, someone he cares so much for...

She deserves so much more...She is so much better than he is, House thought, and yet, the selfish part of him, the one that was quickly beginning to gain terrain against his sensible one, desperately wanted to cling onto her and have her be his lover together.

Funny how the ones who look to be the healthiest and happiest are in reality the best actors and nobody knows if there’s ever anything wrong with them. Which only made her kindness and feelings towards him more genuine, he thought. She’s in constant pain, just like him, it was no wonder she could sympathise so well with, unlike everybody else...Or maybe she was just empathetic enough? More like Pathetic, she’d say, no doubt.

Time passed at an irrelevant pace, until she finally began to stir in her unconscious state, and finally, she fluttered her eyes open, making Gregory sigh in relief, and as soon as they made eye contact, her cheeks began to turn a hue pinker.

“Greg...? Why are you...? What happened...?” Kat muttered, clutching her head in pain. “You don’t remember anything from last night?” he asked, frowning in confusion. “...Sorry. I know I was pretty sad...And I was listening to music from my childhood at home...And I started drinking...And I remember the bottle of pills taunting me...And from then on, it’s all blank. Did I...Did I call you...?” she clinged on his shirt to get into a sitting position. “Yeah, something like that. Can you stand? You need to change into dry clothes before you catch the Rhino thing.” he joked, making the girl smile softly. “Oh no, not the Rhino thing!” she chuckled, and with a bit of help, she got up, and was able to change into proper, warm clothes. “I’m starving, wanna go eat something? I have some coupons for the Chinese restaurant just down the street.” she hooked her arm to his, leaning her head on his shoulder. “Sounds like a plan, let’s go. But before that, you must promise me never to do something like that again.” House looked at her with seriousness in his eyes. “Okay. I promise. I...I don’t know why I caved in like that. I always promised myself I’d never go that far...I fucked up once, but in a different way...And...I guess in my drunk state I didn’t realise that no matter how many pills I take, the pain won’t go away...Drunk people are really stupid, aren’t they” she chuckled awkwardly, lowering her head in guilt and shame as she used her chopsticks to get some noodles. “...People in pain do stupid things sometimes.” Greg muttered, letting silence take over them for a few minutes, before speaking again. “Happy late birthday, Katrina.” his words made her look at him with eye, confused eyes, before taking out her phone at looking at the date, realising she spent her whole birthday drinking. “I...Completely forgot...Guess now we’re even, huh?” Kat smirked, pointing her chopsticks at him in amusement.

Not much time later, House called Kat over to his office at evening, and everyone dear to her was there, celebrating that Lisa managed to get rid of Vogler once and for all...Of course, of the 100 million $ too, but that’s besides the point. They were back in business, the shock family, ready to save more lives again!

Everything went back to normal - Or well, the normality that was entrapped in their weirdness - But it was THEIR normality. A chaos of going back and forth, arguing, almost killing patients, and then, saving them miraculously.

However, nobody is safe from illness, and one day, during some diagnosis discussion, Kat was pacing back and forth, thinking and saying her ideas for the others to refute or agree to, only for her to abruptly stop in her tracks, her back facing everyone as she coughed.

“Haemoptysis.” she muttered, only for House to grimace. “Haemo-what now? Last time I checked, our patient didn’t cough nor spit blood.” but instead of answering, she coughed up a bit more, her hands covering her face. “Vertigo...” she spoke again, in a much fainter voice. “What the hell are you babbling about?” he hit his cane on the ground, only to see her taking a few steps forwards, albeit, a little wobbly. “I’m...Gonna...” and just as she uttered those words, her legs gave out, and she fell, the only reason for not hitting the ground being Greg’s Godly reflexes which ensured he caught her. “Damn it, not again...What are you three sitting around for? Get a crash cart and a nurse!” House scolded his interns, who rushed to do just that. “What did you do this time, Kat...” he shook his head in disdain as he brushed her gorgeous crimson hair out of her face.

She looked so peaceful now, unconscious, were it not for the blood on her chin and hands, but now, unlike last time, she didn’t look like some kind of undead who was ready to give up her life at any given moment out of sheer misery and self-hatred.

As soon as she was taken away from his arms, he refused to go look over her...He didn’t want to admit it, but he was afraid that, since he cared so much about her, he would become unreasonably subjective and he may completely screw up her diagnosis. Greg hoped with all his heart that it was nothing life-threatening, but blood in her lungs was no easy, nor simple thing.

Wilson visited her and held her hand, Cuddy visited her and kissed her forehead, even his subordinates went to check up on her because they wanted to...Even her cardiology colleagues went to see how she was doing...

But not him. Never him. Because if he did, he was screwed for life.

No matter how much he wanted to deny himself, however, he couldn’t help but find himself in her room, in the middle of the night, sitting on a chair besides her, holding her hand in both of his, kissing it and thinking of her diagnosis.

That is, until her hand suddenly started to shake, startling the doctor besides her, as she opened her eyes, panting for air.

“Hey, you okay?” House asked, squeezing her hand gingerly. “Urgh, yeah...Just had a nightmare...Followed by sleep paralysis. Again. Nothing new, here. Uhmm...It may sound as a bit of a deja-vu, but what in the world happened?” she sighed, getting into a sitting position, looking at him. “You tell me. You coughed blood, got dizzy and fainted. Did you take anything? Felt bad or something?” he asked, making the girl scratch the back of her head awkwardly. “Nothing that I haven’t felt before, really. I have anxiety, I frequently experience restlessness, problems with breathing, arrhythmia, sometimes dizziness and stuff. It’s inconvenient, but you get used to it, so I didn’t took any pills, especially not after that scare a few days ago. Do you...Think it’s because of...My fuck up?” she looked worriedly at him, but he only looked down, thinking. “Not so fun being on the other end, huh?” House smirked before shaking his head. “I have no idea. We need to do some tests on you before we can confirm anything. But you’ll be fine, that much I can guarantee.” he promised, which made her smile sadly, leaning back on the pillow, squeezing his hand back. “Can you stay with me a bit longer? I, uhm...You know...Problems sleeping...When I’m with someone...I tend to sleep better...And a close to a full night. I-I don’t know why, but it’s always been like this.” she brought up the hem of the blanket to cover her face. “Then get a boyfriend and sleep with him. You’re young, smart and beautiful, there’s nothing stopping you from that.” Greg muttered in a low voice, almost self-deprecating. “Yeah, that’s easy. If men actually went out of their way to talk to me...And that hasn’t happened in 15 years, so, as you say, Mazel Tov. That, and I’m afraid of people.” she sighed, biting her lip in embarrassment. “Whaaaaaat? No boyfriend in 15 years? No action? I don’t believe you.” he took off the blanket from her face, only to see her blushing face. “You’re the only person that I never lied to. I’m great at lying and deceiving and all that...But yeah, I know, I’m pitiful, don’t have to remind me. Why do you think my life is mostly spent in the hospital. I’m not as lonely as I’d be at home.” she looked away, snatching her blanket back. “You don’t have to stay. It’s much more comfortable sleeping in a bed, especially with that leg of yours.” “Yeah, it would be. Now close your eyes and get some sleep.” and so, he didn’t budge from her side the whole night, and she didn’t wake up from nightmares or restlessness.

Days went on, and she kept on getting tested, and House was beginning to get more and more angry at the fact that he wasn’t able to properly diagnose her faster, and he was becoming unbearable for everyone around him.

On the other hand, just as Lisa and James were visiting her, trying to keep her company, when the two people she never expected to see again burst into her room with wide grins on their faces...Which in turn, made Kat drop her phone on the ground from the shock.

“What the hell...?” the red haired girl’s bottom lip quivered in anger. “Kitty-Kat, darling, we missed you so much! You haven’t come home in 15 years!” the mum stepped forward, ready to throw her arms around the girl, but she was met with hostility as Kat dragged herself backwards in the bed, away from her, pure disgust glowing on her face. “Don’t you dare touch me! And don’t you even think about calling me that nickname! I don’t care if you’re my parents, you never gave a damn about me, so don’t pretend to do now that THE perfect daughter is terminally sick and needs a quick organ donation that would ultimately KILL the useless, unwanted, worthless daughter!” Kat sneered at them, untangling the respiratory oxygen tubes who got knotted in her sudden gesticulation. “Kat, are you alright...?” James walked next to her bed, trying to calm her down, only to get yelled at. “No, I’m not! Get them out of here before I get a restriction order!” she continued to glare at them. “Come one, Kitten, don’t be like that, we came all the way from Europe to see you, when you didn’t even give us a call! I don’t know why you hate us.” the dad gave an awkward smile, as if he was embarrassed by his problematic child. “You didn’t call once to tell me Happy Christmas, or...Or Happy Birthday...You didn’t congratulate me on finishing University or on...Literally anything. And now, you come to me only to make sure that I actually die so you could take away my organs and make sure your favourite daughter keeps on living...And you’re actually...You really...Have the guts to ask me WHY I hate you? I hate you because you never cared for me, that’s why!” she gripped the hand grasps of the bed, not realising that House also got in the room. “No need to be so selfish, darling, it’s just a few organs that you could live without! We managed to find a heart transplant, we just need a kidney and part of your liver!” the father tried to negotiate, only for her to grit her teeth. “You know what? I hope my sister dies the most painful death there is, and that you go off after her. We may be blood related, but I was never your daughter. And you know what? Just to make sure...You think you can get my organs? Here’s my response to that!” in a fit of rage, she ripped her oxygen tubes, which continued with violent coughing and some blood. “Why the hell do you even want me to treat you when all you do is get yourself in self-harming situations? First, you OD on anti-depressants while drunk, and now you’re cutting off your oxygen supply to prove your point that you have mummy and daddy issues and that you’d rather die than...Die? You’re just a selfish, immature girl with suicidal tendencies whenever things don’t go her way. You think I’m gonna lie to the transplant committee for someone like that? Because the answer is NO!” House limped in front of her, speaking with so much hatred that it made the girl cry and shake, crestfallen at the words she heard. “And you just had to go ahead and tell everyone that I’m fucked in the head. I wonder how much that is gonna up my chances of actually...Making friends and...A boyfriend...Y’know...Literally anyone who’d actually give a fuck about me. So...Yeah, thanks, you’re right, I’d rather die than being humiliated by the only person I ever actually had any genuine feelings for, because I’m sort of a sociopath with relationship traumas. So, if you could do me a favour, before I pass out, pick these two idiots and get yourself out of this place before I call security, okay? Thanks, bye.” and just like that, she started coughing up more blood, and fainted.

Seeing her being a reckless idiot drove House through the roof, and he realised that maybe, his dad wasn’t the only one to need a “Parent Of The Year” award, but even so, the fact that Katrina was so angry that she felt the need to be so overly dramatic to prove a point, and to have Cuddy kick them out of the hospital, sure was meant she was desperate, and for good reason. No wonder she never spoke about her family, or about anything about herself, unless it meant some nostalgic things about her country and other things that could come up as funny when told properly.

But why the hell does she have to make everything so much more complicated to him, especially now that he completely screwed up everything and she hates him.

How the hell did he manage to fuck up like that, just when he finally got ready to tell her how he feels...How he GENUINELY feels, without having to get full-sarcastic-jerk mode, and just telling her that he’s over Stacy completely and he’s ready to commit to her...And he just ends up basically telling her that he hates her, which is a complete lie.

Great job, Gregory House. The only thing you’re capable of doing is diagnosing and saving people, and sometimes, even that fails. Good thing she was okay, and with some anti-coagulant medicine, the clot that was causing her pulmonary embolism completely disappeared, and she was all ready to go.

Ever since that day, House didn’t visit her, her parents completely disappeared, and James and Lisa were completely pitiful, which only made the girl miserable. Thanking whatever deity existent that it was the last night being stuck in the hospital as the unfavoured party, so she went up on the roof, sitting on the little wall edge, looking up at the starts on the sky, putting the saddest song she ever knew to play on her MP3 player, which was “Daca ploaia s-ar opri” from Cargo, and as she softly sang the lyrics, the door opened and the sound of tapping cane was heard,

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“I have no idea what the words are, but he song seems pretty sad. What gives?” House limped towards her, which only made her groan and roll her eyes in annoyance. “Aaaand you had to ruin the most emotional song as well. Great, what is next on your long list of destroying? I have no dignity, no pride anymore...My health you can’t legally screw...And there’s nothing else on the table is there? I have no heart anyway. So why are you here?” she asked, not even bothering to look at him. “Would you believe me if I said I came here to apologise?” House asked, getting closer to her, then turning his head to look up at the stars as well. “After what you pulled in that room...No. I don’t believe you anymore. You’re a jerk. You’ve always been one, but not to me, and not enough to actually hurt me. Now you did. Congratulations. You lost a friend...Not that you’d care, anyway. You’ve proven me that enough. You can go now.” she sighed, hugging her knees to her chest. “Yeah, I know, I fucked up. I got scared when I saw you pull that stunt, I panicked and...That happened. And I’m sorry about that. I admit that much.” he said as he put his coat around her, hoping she wouldn’t die of cold or something. “Fantastic, the asshole knows how to apologise. Congratulations, you are amazing. Now, do you actually expect me to believe you, or what are you trying to accomplish?” Kat asked, giving him a sarcastic smile. “Before you got sick, I was...I was going to ask you out. But then you got sick, and in turn I got worried sick.” Greg began to explain, only to get cut off. “No, you’re lying or pitying me. You don’t like me. I’m not...I’m not Stacy, or...Or Lisa. I don’t challenge you with every turn you take, I’m not a jerk to you, I am...Practically nothing like the women that you have been interested with, so excuse me for not believing a word you say. I was sick, vulnerable and pitiful, you were miserable, you heard that I haven’t dated in 15 years, you thought I was desperate for love, but trust me, after what happened when I was 17...I don’t think I want anything like that again.” she tsked, looking away from him, laying her chin on her knees. “I know I’m a jerk, but does that really sound like something I would do?” his voice sounded almost hurt at the implication. “...No, it doesn’t. But I also don’t believe that you like me and you’re not saying that just because you heard my dying words...Allegedly. You’ve said your speech, now you can go, and we will continue our work as it always was, without having to see each other, so no more paging me when it’s convenient to you either. Goodbye.” she waved her hand to dismiss him, but he didn’t budge. “What will it take for you to believe me? I will give up my parking spot for you. I will play the guitar for you. I...Will convince Wilson to give me his stupid dog so you could visit him more often. I don’t know, you know I’m horrible with these things called emotions. But I want you to know that what I say its genuine...And apart from what I said today, I never lied to you. So, if you ever have it in your heart to believe me and give it a chance...I’ll be waiting. And...I’ll be here to listen to you talk about your pain as well.” he confessed, and as soon as he turned around to leave, she quickly extended her arm to grab his wrist. “You...Really...Mean it?” she muttered, not daring to look at him. “Because if you fuck up, I swear I’m going to do something completely unethical and against the Hippocratic oath. Primum non nocere, they say. First of all, don’t do harm. I’m completely fine with killing you, because, in case you don’t know, I’m a sociopathic, heartless foreigner with no morals or ethics.” she smirked at him in amusement. “There’s nothing wrong with a bit of Nocere, if you have the Vicodin for it. Fire-Kissed girls are said to kiss the best. If we test that theory and it’s true...Then I think we both know we’re gonna work pretty well. If you want to.” he looked at her, putting her hands of her face, looking at her tenderly. “I really hate that I was made broken from the making in factory to be completely unable of hating how big of a jerk you are. Why is it so...Endearing, when it comes from you, but completely repulsive when it comes from anyone else? I can’t tell, and it’s annoying, because I can read people to a T. On the other hand...There is another saying...Vixens always get what they want. Maybe I finally scored the big jackpot.” she chuckled, pulling him down in a soft kiss, the feeling of warmth and love lingering on, intoxicating them even after they parted. “Yeah. I was right. You’re like my own fix of Vicodin or Amphetamines, and I’m completely addicted to you.” he flashed her a charming, playful smile, before kissing her with even more fire and passion than before. “Careful, you don’t want to OD, do you? You’ll need a detox or rehab.” she laughed at him, putting her hands over his, kissing the inside of his wrist. “Oh, please, I’d OD on you ever day, as many times as you want, and I’d have no regrets. You know what they say...Tout le monde necessite La Petite Mort.” he retorted just as cheekily, which in turn, made her laugh merrily. “I can’t believe-! You just...You just said that-...! You’re an incredibly, annoyingly good flirter, especially because I told you those pick up lines before...But don’t forget about me.” she shook with laughter, winking at him mischievously. “Wilson’s ex-wives always praise him for being the best. I’ll prove him I’m better than him at everything. Especially this.” he chuckled, sitting next to her, putting his arm around her shoulder, pulling her into his chest, kissing the top of her head. “You better not talk about...That...To Wilson...Or Lisa...Or anyone, for the matter, or I swear, that little death you’re talking about, will be more literal than metaphorical.” she threatened him, poking his sides. “Oh, no, I’m scared of a little fox biting my nose while I’m asleep. Whatever could I do?” he mockingly called for help, which, as usual, made her laugh. “Jerk.” she grinned, hugging him tightly, cuddling closer to his side. “Yeah. I’ve been called that a lot.”

#house md #gregory house #gregory house x reader #gregory house imagine #gregory house x oc #james wilson #lisa cuddy #katrina black #robert chase #allison cameron #eric foreman #house md x reader #house md imagine

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soulvomit · 4 years ago

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Now here is my thermonuclear hot take: a deconstruction then reconstruction of MPDG narratives

My thermonuclear hot take: The Manic Pixie Dream Girl archetype is based on a very realistic set of romantic encounters that might’ve been experienced between 20something single people living in 1990s or early 2000s NYC or the Bay Area. Let’s step away from the world of ~Hollywood Movie Magic~ for five minutes and imagine how MPDG stories would play out in real life. Think about a boring coder living in SF in the 90s or 00s - when the Bay Area was still affordable to an average-ass tech worker. He makes enough money at the time to live on his own, or he has a roommate. Knew plenty of guys like him. They’re the majority of guys I had the opportunity to try to date at that point, but it was depressing because they - like the average MPDG movie character - were all depressed workaholics with no hobbies. Guys like the average MPDG movie male character were actually a dime a dozen. And in a gentrifying city with multiple art schools, so are real life MPDGs. So Coder Guy meets a whimsical woman out and about and she’s the exact opposite of his cubicle farm world. She’s an art student and hangs out with the performance artists and takes him on a whimsical tour of the city’s art world. He learns there is more to life than his job. But eventually, the whimsy wears thin. He may be reasonably well paid but he’s middle class, and he still works for his living, see. The woman’s whimsy never gets her into trouble because she has daddy’s lawyer on speed dial, and her lifestyle is hugely bankrolled by her parents. She doesn’t NEED to be responsible! Eventually he will marry a woman who is a little more staid. He probably marries a nice girl from his hometown, or he dates a woman he works with. You have to ask yourself, how often - in MPDG movies - does the relationship even WORK OUT? I feel as if more of them haven’t, than have. There is a whole discourse in MPDG movies, but it’s not the one that people think - it’s about interactions between middle income working men and whimsical heiresses. Notice that the working men are *dead middle?* They’re almost never licensed professionals - that almost becomes an entirely different genre. He wants to chase his MPDG muse, but can’t quite catch up with her...

He’s in love with what she embodies, which he can never have.

#we can't talk about what MPDGs are at all because we're that conditioned to not notice or talk about class

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unholyhelbig · 5 years ago

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How about part two to the workplace Au you just did? Loved the first one!

A/N: Sure thing! I’m glad you guys liked the first one so much (You can read it here)

Request more prompts here | Read on ao3!

Chloe could read the discomfort on Beca Mitchell’s face as soon as she unzipped the bag that she had picked up from the dry cleaners. She was struck with the instant scent of lavender detergent, fanning her hand over the outfit like she was picking the next lucky number for the lottery.

Beca had her hand on her chin, a flash of red made her head spin. She was in sweatpants and a grease-stained shirt. She figured that if she had ignored the date on the bottom of the flyer long enough, maybe Chloe would just forget.

No such luck.

“How did you find my apartment?” She asked, clinging to the door.

“It was in your file.”

“I feel like this is slightly illegal.”

“Slightly,” Chloe pushed her way through the door and looked around the apartment. It was kept in a shockingly messy state. Beca presented herself as someone who dotted every ‘I’ and crossed every ‘T’. At least, that’s how she was at work. But there was a leaning tower of pizza boxes and a couple of record sleeves strewn across the room. “You’re not even close to ready.”

“I forgot,” She let the door swing closed “what if we just ignore this PR bullshit and watch a movie instead. Technically I’m still socializing.”

Chloe turned on her heel and scanned Beca up and down. She hugged the bag close to her. “It would look horrible for me to ditch a party I planned.”

“Then you go. I’ll keep watch here.”

“Beca,”

The coder flopped down onto the pile of blankets at the far end of the sofa. She crossed her socked feet and waved her hand in the air as if asking Chloe to continue. For the first time tonight, she noticed the makeup and the slim fitted dress that hugged every inch of the woman’s curves. The black material made the sharp disdain in her eyes glow even further.

But goddamn it, if she wasn’t absolutely captivating. And she smelled lie oranges. Beca had half the mind to stealthy survey her fingers for any trace of a ring. She hadn’t done so in the office, but there was no man to be seen in them. She had blown her chance, she figured, by being her authentic self.

“Red isn’t my color.” She stared at the dress. It had a plunging neckline and would make her look pale. She wasn’t working with much, Chloe was kidding herself. She was also here three full hours before the dreaded thing was supposed to start.

“Just give it a shot. You promised.”

“Wrong. I considered.”

Chloe tossed the bag at her. The fabric was nice, soft against her fingers. She stared at the slight bit of lace and the little bag of gold jewelry that the woman had attached. A few rings and a necklace tipped with a triangle that practically pointed at her cleavage.

“Alright, whatever. I’ll shower.”

She hoisted herself from the couch and tried not to stare too long at the look of triumph on Chloe’s face. It was equally as infuriating as it was attractive. She grabbed a towel from the pile of unfolded clothes on the other end of the sofa and vanished into the back hallway.

Chloe stood like a statue until she heard the water running. Then her curiosity got the better of her and she started to glace around the space; the walls were slathered in charcoal grey and a few album covers were framed and tacked up. Beca had a record player and an extensive library of music. It seemed to be the only tidy thing in here.

She walked over to the couch and picked up one of the blankets. It smelled like detergent and whatever musk Beca radiated herself. She started absently folding, chewing the inside of her lip, so deep in thought that she hadn’t even realized that the shower had shut off and Beca padded into the room in nothing but a towel, still soaked to the bone.

She cleared her throat “Did you clean up?”

“It’s a nervous habit,” Chloe turned and tried not to let her breath catch. The employee usually stuck with baggy sweatpants and even baggier shirts. They didn’t’ have a dress code at work and she border-lined pajamas with her outfit choices. But Beca? Beca had a figure. “You ready?”

“I’m at your mercy.” She grumbled, “But no eyeliner.”

“oh, come on.”

“You’re not getting close to my eye with a pencil, forget it.” She crossed her arms over her chest, not letting the towel slip in the slightest “Fine. But I’m doing it. Stop pouting.”

Chloe begged to differ. She didn’t pout. She didn’t’ want to push it any further though, so she nodded and grasped the dress before letting Beca lead the way to her room.

Beca tugged uncomfortably at the hem of her dress as they exited the car. It had hiked up as soon as she sat down, but at that point, she didn’t’ care. The weather had taken a turn to the colder side and she just wanted feeling in her legs. A light dusting of snow had forced their driver to flick on the wipers and move closer to the glass to see past the haze of headlights.

Chloe grasped at her wrist absently, forcing her to stop shifting the fabric. Her hand was warm enough to shock her into complying, but not without a glare. They looked like quite the pair; Beca was almost the same height as Chloe with the heels that were supplied, and she stood out horridly. Red like blood on the snow after a fresh hunt.

The company had spared no expense with the carpet, purple like their logo and leading into a lavish lobby in a hotel that Beca had never been in. She was sure they would throw her out if she walked in and asked to use the bathroom with fancy soap. But when Chloe was at her side, looping her arm through her own, she could pass instantly.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” Chloe read the blush on the woman’s cheeks “I’m sure if I weren’t holding onto you, you’d be face down on the floor by now. Take it slow.”

“You sound like a stage mom.”

“In that case,” she frowned “You’re a horrible student.”

Beca scoffed but was secretly thankful for the human crutch. Chloe had an easy way of walking about her, she pulled her shoulders back and lifted her chin, and acted like she owned the whole building. It was one foot in front of the other, and Beca wobbled on the first few, but eventually evened out. Maybe the stance was a tactical thing- to keep the balance.

They walked through the doors and Beca instantly felt her legs wobble at the direct warmth. There was a clothed table by the entrance, lined with identical masks. Chloe plucked a red one off the table and passed Beca a black one, looking at her expectantly.

“The whole purpose of this is for you to get comfortable being around people. Maybe you can do that if they can’t see the top half of your face.” She spoke with ease as she knotted her own mask. And she had to admit, even though this was utterly stupid, she wouldn’t have recognized Chloe in a crowd. Not if she hadn’t spent the last four hours with her.

She fastened her own mask and took Chloe’s outstretched hand, begrudgingly but thankful at the same time; the ballroom was equally as impressive, violet lights on an installed dance floor and clothed tables with little favors and plates. It looked like a wedding for bank robbers, but Beca couldn’t help letting her mouth prop open.

“Shocked?” Chloe asked, scanning the décor “I do know how to throw a hell of a party.”

“The last party I went to was not this classy.” Beca breathed “We did have bongs made out of apples though, so I’m going to need you to step up your game.”

Chloe smiled, it looked brighter under her mask. She leads them towards a table in the corner and plucked two flutes of champagne from the passing waiter. Alcohol. That was something that Beca wasn’t opposed to. She finished it in two long gulps.

She hovered awkwardly by as the woman who had dragged her here in the first place spoke with a couple of people that she wouldn’t have recognized even if they were shrouded by masks. They shouted over the music; a man in a snazzy looking suit questioned her presence.

“This is one of the most talented coders we have!” Chloe shouted over the sound of the base “Almost single-handedly created the VPN.”

“You’re impressive!” He called out to her “Such a pretty date too!”

Chloe just laughed and Beca thanked him over the bass. He squeezed Chloe’s shoulder before vanishing into the crowd. She leaned close then, her breath hot against Beca’s collarbone, and that familiar floral scent clouded her lungs and judgment. “See, that wasn’t so hard. You’re a natural. Want to dance?”

She did not, in fact, want to dance. But Chloe pulled her onto the floor almost as smoothly as the champagne glasses. Beca was glad that she had swallowed it so quickly. It made the idea of dancing seem more appealing. And Chloe did have good taste in music.

They worked themselves into the crowd and Beca let the sound flow through her. She ignored all of the people, for the most part. Chloe was painfully obvious behind her, grinding close, running her hands across the dress that she had picked out. Beca felt like she was back in college- and she had to admit, she was having fun.

She lost track of how many songs they had danced to, but eventually, the DJ lowered the music and spoke into the microphone. “Alright folks, we having fun? I hope so! I want to interrupt your masquerade for just a moment.”

There were a few groans from the crowd, but none of them sincere.

“Now, I know you’re all being secretive about your identities tonight. But I want to pull the one and only Chloe Beale onto the stage. Y’all okay with that?”

There were a few shouts from the people around her, followed by applause as Chloe gave Beca’s arm a squeeze and maneuvered her way through the crowd. A woman in an even tighter navy blue dress helped her up the stage and Beca clapped along, lilting her head as she watched, captivated like the rest of the room.

This didn’t’ feel customary, bringing the party planner up to say a few words. Not when it was essentially a giant PR event for a tech company. Beca crossed her arms over her chest as Chloe captivated an entire crowd.

“I’m glad you’re all having fun under the cover of the night,” She lowered her voice dramatically, flashing that brilliant smile. “And we’re so happy to unveil our new VPN, that everyone has been working so hard on.”

It had been months of coding, Beca having to fix so many bugs that the 0’s and 1’s ran circles around her head. Hearing praise from Chloe’s lips made her tingly- or maybe that was the buzzing of her skin after eating cold pizza for breakfast and drinking on a nearly empty stomach.

“We strive for innovation and protection, and our new product can give you just that.” She gripped the podium and waited for a few cheers to settle “When I first started this company in my parent's basement, which doubled as our laundry room, I never imagined this. Thank you, and enjoy the party!”

Beca’s heart had seized in her chest then, as the music started up and the people around her moved with the rhythm once more. She let them bump into her as she mindlessly walked to the edge of the lit-up floor, towards Chloe.

This made sense to her, finally, it made sense. The reason why she was pushing her so hard to interact with other people in the office, why she didn’t have a title on her door. Chloe was the boss. Chloe had seen her ratty apartment and, oh my god, Chloe knows she smokes weed.

The woman in the navy dress talked animatedly to the woman at the side of the stage, nodding and gesturing to the rest of the room. Chloe looked pensive, she mumbled something under her breath and immediately turned towards Beca.

“Dude, what the hell?” She asked, sounding less elegant than she’d hoped.

Chloe shrugged “Stacie from HR wanted to talk to you first but I thought I’d give it a shot.”

“This is literally your party.”

“Yes?”

“Like in your honor. Not something you planned.”

“Well, I did that too.” She shrugged nonchalantly as Beca gaped at her “Look, Beca. I like you, okay? You’re one stubborn girl. And I wanted to spend a night with you, is all. When the report about your lack of social skills happened across my desk, I took a chance.”

She felt her cheeks heat up “You could have just asked me, you know?”

“Would you have said yes?”

“Absolutely not,” She pointed her finger “But only because you’re making me wear a dress. Maybe next time, we could just settle for street tacos or something?”

Chloe laughed, and it was a beautiful sound that mixed so perfectly with the music. “Next time?”

#Beca Mitchell #Chloe beale #bechloe #bechloe au #bechloe oneshot #bechloe fic rec #bechloe fanfiction #Pitch Perfect #pitch perfect au #pitch perfect fanfiction #workplace au

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thenaughtyguy · 4 years ago

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Dying Love

*this is a fictional story, matching any of its characters with any real person would be just a coincidence, and the place name and date have been just used to make it look real.

I think I should pen the dying love of two and a half years.

Let me first tell you something about the protagonists of this story, I, Mayank, 18 at that time, my hometown is Burhanpur and I study in Bhopal, and my hero, Virat- he was 20 at that time, he is properly from Bhopal.

It started on 27th November 2018, we met on Grindr, we both were new on that app, I was still exploring what is gay, what is bisexual, what is straight, I had never seen any porn, so I was totally unaware of sexual stuff, even today I'm untouched of all those things, I just knew was that, I feel attracted to boys and I never feel the same for girls. I got one friend who was member of QueerMitra, he helped me in knowing my feelings, I was graphic designer and content writer for them for few posts, I was trying to find my seniors and batch mates on that app, and one day- it was 27th November, (Exactly one month before I started using Grindr), a guy sent me "hi", I didn't know how to chat with people, after all I have got my first smart phone and I was not used to it. I sent "Hi" too. I said I'm in MANIT, 1st year CSE student. He said he is commerce student. he was 20. everything was going very nice. I had no knowledge of sex... I was just looking for someone with whom I can talk on my personal topics. so pics never mattered for me, so I didn't ask. but he sent his pic, I was shocked to see, I said send your real pics, he send another one, He was looking so hot, I was unable to believe, for few days I was offline, I came to Burhanpur, It was winter vacations for 1 month. One day I opened Grindr, and He never asked for my pic, he asked for my number and I gave him, I have started sharing everything with him, I had ordered my laptop, and again I was offline for few days, my laptop arrived on 5th December, and I was very happy, on 6th December, he texted me "hi" on whats-app, he sent me his pic, but I never believed on him, we talked after everything, I was very happy because of laptop and I was facing problem while starting it, I was updating him with every single thing, those days are literally so memorable to me, I was a lil kid.

Then on 7th December we made a call, I heard his voice, it was so mesmerizing, I asked him, do you sing, he said how did you know, actually I had become fan of his voice. I used to laugh so much, I was so happy, there were no words, just my blushing and happiness and laughter that he can listen to. I was so happy while talking with him, But always I had to go to terrace, and as like always, it used to be night time, so darkness and he never saw me, even I didn't believe on his pic, I never had dp too, so everything was like blind date, I was not using Grindr then, one day we made vc, but it was terrace and too dark, he hadn't got to see me, but I had seen him, he was so handsome and exactly the same as I saw in his pics. But I was fan of his voice more than his looks, and to be honest in our whole journey, I never praised him for his look, just I praised him for his voice, he used to love singing and cooking, so I started having interest in cooking, I used to ask him for recipes.

In no time he had become my very good friend, my secret box, and the surprising thing was he didn't had seen me, on 30th December I clicked one selfie and edited it, and keep it as my dp, he saw me first time in that edited pic. and even today I have the same dp on whats-app, I think it is the sign that my heart is still waiting for him.

Then I came to Bhopal, but we didn't met in real, we just used to talk day and night. everyday my first message used to be "gm" and last message -"gn and tc"

Whole day whenever I got time we used to chat, soon he got a job in Dainik Bhasker, he got busy, so we chose to chat instead of calling, and as our timing didn't match, he used to reply when he got time.

I was so happy. and finally after 8 months, we met first time in real on 19th July 2019. it was just 10 min meeting, but I remember every second of it. we shake hands, his that soft hands, and his voice was so nice in real, he was dressed up in formal dress, white shirt, black pant, we were of same height, he was looking fit and so cute, but I didn't say a word, I was a kid, I was so much blushing, I didn't say anything but after that, I text him my all feelings, I was so shy to speak out anything. but he was praising me, and the most memorable moment was that hug, he tried to hug me while we were leaving, that soft touch, not a tight hug, just the way friends hug each other, but there was a softness and love in it.

We had become more than a friend to me, we started using love emojis, everything was slow but everything was memorable, we were too happy.

I had learnt graphic designing, I used to be very busy with the work of all different societies, but the messaging was all same, I remember, the whole day, whenever I used to have free time, I used to message him.

He started being busy, his timing of job changed, it was from afternoon to late night 11-12. He used to get tired, so replying every single message become tough for him, but he used to read my all messages, He used to care a lot.

Even every Sunday he used to go job, he didn't had a fixed day for holiday, it could be any day in a week, so it become tough for our meeting.

We started having little bit of fighting much often, always it was me who used to get mad at him and he used to be so busy that he didn't even understand that I'm mad at him. Actually I was in love so deep that I couldn't able to get mad for long time and finally I myself had to approach him. I could understand but really not having time for me. He used to say, I'm busy you can search someone for you, I won't be mad. That single sentence was too enough to feel his care.

But still I'm a human, I used to get mad at him because he was not having time for me.

For me, he was the only person whom I could say everything, whole day I used to tell him whats going on in my life, but now he didn't had time for reading those too too long messages, he used to say, I'm too tired and I can't type, So I let him go. he used to watch you-tube video before sleeping. Facebook has option to choose what to do after your death, who can access your account, I chose Virat as that person who can access my account after me, there was a option to write down something with that permission and so I wrote one big letter to him saying, I wanted to see him while dying, I wanted to say thank you to so many people, I wrote down everyone's name- my family, my friends, i wrote everything, it was literally a very long letter, It was too kiddish too.

I was in love, I used to create and graphics for impressing him, but he never praised anything, I was not a graphic designer, I'm a coder but I did that for him and he never commented anything on it. But still I tried to do whatever I could do,

There one time came when I started using Grindr again, and one guy started hitting on me, I used to tell Virat everything, so he could be jealous, but was such a rude, he was always okaywith everything.

I start having weak feelings for him

But when it come to choose between those two, I chose Virat, and same thing happened many times and I always preferred him over everyone, because It was not totally his fault, and fighting, getting mad, getting sad, crying all these are just part of love.

He was always special for me but in between a period came when I became more closer to my bestie- Parv, he was my crush but we were strangers in starting, but with time we had come so closer that he become my best friend and then my roommate we used to study together, he was so protective and caring for me, I start feeling for him, I used to tell everything to Virat and while chatting I never felt that he is jealous but later one day when we were on call he used the word "Tumhara Parv", I could feel that little jealousy, I was so happy. but still I was feeling something for Parv. I was so confused because I was feeling something special about two persons parallely.

And soon a day came when lots of things happened, my friends knew about me that I'm gay, they even knew that Parv is my crush, they started teasing me and Parv, everything was so nice, but one day my roommates other than Parv changed the hostel for the sake of study, I was crying like a baby, and in that sadness I speak out everything to Parv even about having crush on him and he said don't tell other friends that he knew it, and in just 2 days my other friends came back, (when todsy I think about it, it looks so dramatic,) now my all friends knew everything, it was so fun, I was so happy, everywhere were just happiness,

But Virat was less involved in it, my friends never liked Virat, they did so many mischievous things for our breakup, but every-time we understood each other, once my friend Hardik hacked my mobile he used to read everything, all my lovey dovey conversations with Virat, then we decided to talk little bit for some time and in those days my friends tried to bring Parv and me closer, Parv become my so special friend but still he was straight, we used to go on long drives and every dream that I have imaged with Virat, was coming to true but with Parv, and in those days Virat started becoming more like my friend than my love and one day I dared my friend Hardik to do whatever he could, and he sent the message to my brother the one which I wrote for my brother to tell him everything about me. I was so afraid what will happen now, but after an emotional conversation with my brother on call, everything got fine, he accepted me, it was a great party time, I was very happy, my friends were more happier than me, but Virat was worried about me, he was worried that problems may come with this, but my friends and my Daa were with me so I had no worries.

One day I confessed my feelings (that Parv already knew) to Parv, he start behaving uncomfortable, I was so sorry for that, but he was afraid of me because I crossed my limits in the text. That day Virat made me a call and said don't worry, he is straight, he was too loving that day, he was treating me very nicely, I was so worried about me, his those lovely words let me move on over everything, and he finally made me smile.

Due to pandemic, we were said to go home, and the day came when I was leaving for home, -17 march 2020, our second meet- and I asked him to come to meet me, he was so angry because I have wasted so much of time that day, he had to go somewhere else, but for me he came, because I was going home, and I asked Parv to empty the room but Parv didn't, he didn't leave the room, It was feeling like, he did it on purpose (I hope it was not jealousy), But Virat himself didn't wanted to come to my room because he didn't want to face my friends those who didn't like him.

so we met in jungle- the MANIT jungle, we had private time there, it was on my demand, because I wanna try something, but to be honest, it was me who denied for something special ( I think you can understand what I mean), because I was afraid of pain (I think you got it, whst I'm saying) but still I had my first kiss, the most memorable moment, I can't forget those moments. then I left for home.

we used to chat, but things were going bad, I used to get angry, I used to block him again and again, It was so kiddish, I used to unblock and send him message and again block him, so he was not able to reply.

Everything was still nice, becsuse everything was our love, I were not serious about our fight, it was just fun. But suddenly one worst day of my life came- 26th April 2020 - It was the birthday of my di, for me my Di is the most special person, I prepared lots of things for Di, pani poori, cake and lot... I was texting him and updating him about everything whats going on here, but I realized no message is going.

I tried fb, insta, calling, everything but I have blocked from everywhere.

I had tried all different numbers that I had in my home, I used all whats-app but he blocked everything.

No reason- just I was blocked from his life, I cried a lot, for many days I tried many things, then one day he didn't blocked that number and said, he is not interested-- I asked for reason but he said, I'm not interested- might something that happened but he said nothing. I said I will always wait for him, I promised him few things, and I keep texting him, he never seen them, But I knew he might be reading in notification, I never loose hope, But one day that whats-app was blocked, I tried other and it was also blocked, I started using insta, I keep on changing account but he never accepted my message request but I was thing he might be still reading, but I was not sure he might have deleted my message request so I keep on changing insta account, everyday or in few days I used to have a new account, even today I have different accounts to text him, I never loose hope.

It's already 8 months, day night I tried to contact him, I tried to listen the reason, what happened that, that he had to block me from everywhere while before the day, we were totally normal. Then the day came I thought to move on and I started hitting on someone, and as Virat is my bestie too, I used to share everything with him through texts which he never seen, and I’m sure he might be reading everything, he was aware that I'm hitting on other guy,(I was wishing him to come back, I was widhing him to feel jeslous, but nothing happened), and again my bad luck, that guy I'm hitting on, said I'm like a brother to him, And so I thought it is what Bhagwan wants and My new year was spent with him- with Virat- ( that I thought I'll be spending with the guy I'm hitting on but happened something else, I was with the guy I was hitting on on 31st but my mind and heart were with Virat), I texted Virat a happy new at midnight 12, I knew he will definitely see this.

But he never replied.

And what a dramatic situation it was, one the same day, in new year party I had met a guy, I had crush on a him in first sight, but he was straight, I was texting everything to Virat, I was thinking, he might feel jealous, I never thought I will approach that guy, but lil bit flirting and things were going in favor, I used to say everything to Virat, but on 21st April 2021- I got a reply and he said “you are just wasting your time over me”, I replied his all messages with hard words but got softened and I said, “I love you”, but till the end of conversation, my all hope and my love had come to its weak point. I was broken. But I didn't let myself break, I diverted my mind and that new guy started taking Virat's position, I know it's not easy, But it's on me, I could control my mind to let it think anything.

But later on, I realized he is straight so whatever I’m thinking is impossible, and it’s again a heart break, but it was hurting not because of the later one but it was because of the former - Virat.

I never forgot him, My feelings for him got weaken but they are still in existence.

My heart still says "Virat, plz rok lo mujhe".

Today it's two and half years of our journey that basically started from whats-app, that pic of his that took my heart away. I think it is not dead, it might be dying, it might be too much injured, it could be in comma for some time, but it's not dead.

Because I believe, there is a part of story that is unheard, the story from Virat’s side. After all what happened that day, why did he suddenly blocked me from everywhere?

It might be just me, who is thinking there is a something that I don’t know, and may be it’s only me who thinks he loves me, and it is possible that he really got bored of me, so he took this way, but if he loved me, I don’t want to loose him, for that lil possibility, I’ll be keep waiting, I won’t loose the hope.

#gay gaylove love 2andhalfyear hope dyinglove

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hereidinathoreauwrites · 5 years ago

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Chapters: 1/5 Fandom: Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Zoey Clarke/Joan Characters: Zoey Clarke, Joan (Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist) Additional Tags: it's the headcannon fic!, your #2 choice, two people start having sex for fun and oops they're in love, Women Loving Women, Developing Relationship, Boss/Employee Relationship, Bisexual Female Character, joan's pov, so I wouldn't have to deal with songs, Lesbian Sex, Fluff and Smut, Vaginal Fingering, Cunnilingus, Cuddling & Snuggling, Post-Coital Cuddling, From Sex to Love, Sex Toys, Bad Dirty Talk, zoey has a lot of emotions, but she doesn't want to talk about them, Joan is concerned but doesn't know how to ask Summary:

It's the headcannon fic!

After Joan’s divorce, she and Zoey have a no-obligation sex deal. Everything was nice and warm until they realized their true and deep feelings for each other.

Joan was having a bad day.

First her prick of an ex-husband had tried to take Cartier and her lawyer still hadn’t called to confirm that her little Pomeranian was safe. Then the guys at work had eaten all the Crunch Berries again (she was seriously going to fire Glenn the next time she saw him) and her emergency scotch stash had run dry.

She threw herself down at her desk, huffing. To top it all off, her vibrator had fried its inner workings a week ago and her acupuncturist had advised against overworking her fingers if she wanted to avoid carpal tunnel.

Joan grit her teeth and opened her tablet so she could at least pretend she was working.

To sum up: she was pissed, hungry, not drunk enough for any of this, and way, WAY too horny.

Joan leaned back in her seat, closing her eyes.

“God what I wouldn’t give for a sex toy…” She muttered. “Or just a hook-up…” For just a moment, she let herself picture a scenario in which she wasn’t pleasuring herself but receiving it from someone else. Someone else was squeezing her breast and playing with her nipple, someone else's fingers were drifting past her stomach and trailing in between her thighs…

Oh god, that would be so nice… At this rate, anyone would do. She just needed a release.

After a second, she opened her eyes and turned back around.

She nearly jumped out of her chair.

Zoey was standing in her office doorway, staring at her like she’d just screamed her thoughts across the office.

Joan sat up. “What…what do you want, Zoey?” She crossed her legs but quickly uncrossed them. She didn’t think Zoey had heard her but what if she had? “Is…is this about the new Chirp specs?”

The coder shifted uncomfortably, her face pinched tightly. “Joan…are you…okay? Is there…anything you need?”

“No Zoey, I’m fine.” She sat on her hands to keep herself from waving the coder away. Her fingers drummed against the edges of her seat.

“Are you…sure?” Zoey asked, inching her way into Joan’s office. It was as if she really didn’t want to be there but thought that she had to be. “Cause…if you do…I can help.”

She had heard. Joan sighed and gave up all pretense of professionalism. “Not unless you’re really okay with violating HR policies…” She growled, hating herself for once again showing such a vulnerability to the young coder. But she couldn’t help it. Joan couldn’t quite put her finger on it but there was something about the young redhead that made her feel like it was okay to spill her secrets. The fact that Zoey was (objectively) cute certainly helped.

Joan shook her head and spun her chair around, watching Zoey’s reflection on the photos of her dogs. Not helpful. Finding her subordinate attractive while her libido was this high was just asking for trouble.

Zoey pursed her lips, eyes squeezing shut. “Maybe…I am…?” She muttered after a moment.

Joan froze. “Wh…what?” She spun back around, nearly tipping herself over, hardly daring to believe what she’d heard.

Zoey refused to look at her. Her face was beet red. “Maybe I’m okay with it…?” She repeated, sounding slightly more sure of herself.

Joan could only stare. Zoey, prim, innocent, kind, probably-still-a-virgin Zoey was…okay with…pleasuring her boss?

“Joan…” Zoey continued, as Joan’s mouth continued to malfunction. “You’re…lonely now that Charlie’s gone…I’m…always…lonely…so…we could…be lonely….together?”

Joan’s typical comment about Zoey’s cryptic way of speaking evaporated as the double-meaning behind the inflections hit her. Did Zoey really want to…?

She shifted in her seat. That was…kinda hot.

“And when you say lonely…” She finally managed to choke out.

Zoey’s whole face turned even redder but she soldiered on. “Uh huh. Sometimes when you get that feeling…you just need…healing.”

Joan blinked, wondering why on earth Zoey would be quoting that particular song right now. She didn’t take her for a Marvin Gaye fan. “I have been…I mean…” She cleared her throat. “It might help…”

“With the loneliness.” Zoey clarified, her fists clenched.

Joan nodded. “Of course. Yeah…” Her head was spinning so much that she had trouble believing the next words out of her mouth. “My place? Tonight?”

Zoey nodded. “Yeah. Okay.” Her whole face was crimson. “I’ll…I’ll be there at 9?”

Joan nodded, already making a mental checklist of everything she’d need to prepare. “Okay. I’ll send a car.” Her heart beat a little faster at the thought that within hours, she’d be in bed with another person again. Another person who wasn’t Charlie.

Another person who was Zoey of all people. She'd never imagined today turning out like this.

Zoey nodded. “I’ll…I’ll see you tonight.” Fists still clenched, she turned stiffly.

“Zoey…” Joan called as the programmer turned to leave.

“Yeah?”

Joan fiddled with her tablet, pretending she was working. “There… there are no expectations here…” She clarified. “I want you to know that.”

The coder nodded. “Right.”

“We wont be dating…” Joan specified. “it’s just…”

“Just company.” Zoey supplied.

“Yeah.”

“Okay.”

Joan looked up. “Okay?” Zoey’s face was still red. But she looked determined at least. Perhaps even a little…excited.

“Sure.” Zoey shrugged. “Why not?”

#it's the headcannon fic!#i'm just gonna hide this among my shitposts #fic #from sex to love #fluff and smut #joan's pov so I wouldn't have to deal with songs #bisexual female character #zoey x joan

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insidious-intent · 6 years ago

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Brother Lover, Lover Brother

Instead of working on Wrong Trousers, here I am with the beginning of another long fic. This is the idea where instead of a clone, Michael instead has an identical twin. Shoutout to @larenoz for helping me with Michael’s twin’s name :)

The first phone call Alex made after receiving the job offer email was Jim Valenti. It’s been almost a decade since he officially became a Valenti, burying the Manes name, and legacy, and fear all with it. The day Jesse Manes was taken away from the house in handcuffs, Jim had promised Alex he would have a better life, and Alex has made damn sure of it.

At age twelve Alex had promised himself he would have a better life, and sitting there in his first office, for his first real job a single week after graduation; Alex almost felt a sense of accomplishment. He was well on his way to achieving that goal of a better life. He turned around to look outside the window of his moderate sized office and let himself feel a moment of contentment.

His phone rang where it was sat on his desk, and Alex glanced over to see Kyle’s drunk smile staring at him. Smiling, Alex picked up the phone. “Hey bro,” he greeted his adoptive brother.

“Bruh! You situated in your new digs? How does it feel to be working at Antar?” Kyle greeted him with his usual exuberance.

“I’ve got a plushie chair and floor to ceiling windows. I think I finally made it,” Alex laughed his response.

“So you’re like a big shot coder dude now?”

“Kyle, man, I explained this to you. I’m not a coder, I’m a Securities Design Engineer. Do I call you a kiddie doctor?”

Kyle’s laugh filled him with joy, just like it always did. When he went from best friend to adopted brother, Alex wasn’t sure how Kyle would handle the change. The brief period when they were fourteen and Alex came out to his family were the toughest, and he was sure Kyle’s anger was going to turn into hate. But Jim and Michelle never let that happen, and by the time Alex left for MIT, he was happy to have his brother back. His real brother.

Kyle was still talking on the other end. “Fine dude, but now that you’re back in Roswell, and have a cushy job, it’s time for us to get you a man! You’re too hot to be so tragically single, and I have a moral duty to find you the hottest guy now that we’re back home.”

Alex sighed at Kyle’s enthusiasm. He had made the mistake of sharing his life plans with Kyle right before they went off to college, and Kyle has not forgotten how Alex planned to be in a steady relationship by the age of twenty-five. And now he was going to use all his brotherly knowledge to embarrass Alex.

“Kyle seriously, I do not need your help with getting dates. Do not even think about it, I’m warning you.”

“I’m just being a good brother.”

“I won’t hesitate to get mom involved. You know how she feels about you not not dating,” Alex shot back.

“Alex! I thought we talked about this!” Kyle’s shocked response was almost a squeal.

Alex grinned and turned towards the door. And suddenly felt all the breath leaving his body in a whoosh. The most gorgeous man Alex had ever laid eyes on was standing at his office door, and Alex felt like he was dreaming. The man had the most gorgeous amber eyes, honey blond curls cropped short on the sides, long on top. A tempting curl hung over an eye. The man wore a well cut, well-fitted navy suit, and seeing him leaning there with a smirk on his face felt like the beginning of the best kind of dream.

“Kyle, I’ll call you back,” Alex whispered and hung up before he could hear a response.

“I didn’t mean to intrude,” the handsome stranger said, sauntering inside the office.

“Oh no,” Alex stuttered, “my brother was just calling to check in.”

“How very family oriented of you,” the man smirks. “I just wanted to come introduce myself to the newest addition to the Securities team. I’m Chris,” he said with an extended hand.

If Alex was a little too enthusiastic handshake, no one had to know. He couldn’t help but notice how smooth Chris’ clearly manicured hand was, smooth and soft.

“I would love to take you out,” Chris said, “to lunch of course.”

Alex couldn’t believe his luck. He had a degree, a great job, and now the man of his dreams just asked him out. Life was really good.

***

“Wow dude, if I’d known you were on such a lucky streak I’d have made you buy a lottery ticket,” Kyle yelled wrapping an arm around Alex’s shoulder as soon as they walked in through the doors of their favorite bar and restaurant, The Wild Pony. Hopefully Maria was there tonight to save Alex from the onslaught of brotherly love.

Speaking of the woman. “Alex has always been the luckiest one,” came Maria’s voice from behind the bar. Alex gave her a grateful smile, knowing his friend wouldn’t let his brother get too overzealous.

“Deluca, you don’t even know the half of it. This guy here starts at the biggest defense contract firm in New Mexico and already has a date with a hot guy!” Kyle announced with a flourish, taking a seat right next to Alex at the bar.

“Ok it isn’t like I’m dating the guy,” Alex clarified. “Yet.”

Maria laughed. “Who is this man who stole your heart so quickly? Give us some details here, Alex.”

“Ok, so. His name is Chris, he works in my company, hot as hell, wears extremely well-tailored suits, and has curls that I want to push my fingers through all the time. So yeah basically the man of my dreams,” Alex said.

“Chris? With curls? That seems very familiar,” Maria mused while pouring them a drink.

Kyle looked at Maria, “you know this guy?”

Maria pushed the drinks at them, “I think he might be this guy I’ve seen hanging out with the Evans twins.”

“Isobel and Max? Damn, Alex I think you bagged a rich dude,” Kyle answered.

Alex was curious now, “you know the Evans twins? Aren’t they like Roswell royalty?”

Maria’s response was laughter. “Yes they are. Their parents started the company you’re working for now, and combined they have more degrees than half the town. Isobel’s boyfriend is the one who got Liz’s dad through the whole citizenship ordeal, and Liz and Max dated for a while.”

Alex had so much hometown gossip to catch up on, and from all the nodding Kyle was doing, he knew all this before Alex did. But tonight was about celebrating life moving in the right direction for him, and Alex didn’t want his family and friends forgetting him for gossip.

“You guys are here to celebrate with me, not update me on the lifestyles of the rich and the famous. Let’s get back to drinking,” he said, slapping his hands on the bar counter.

“And what about your rich hottie?” Kyle jokingly asked.

“That’s definitely the kindest way you’ve described me so far, Kyle,” came a new voice from behind Alex, and he whirled around to see Chris standing behind him. He looked just as delectable in dark skinny jeans and a plaid shirt under a leather jacket, as he did with a suit.

“Guerin? You’re my brother’s object of desire?” Kyle asked, bewildered. He turned to look at Alex with a faint sense of hurt, as if Alex did something wrong here by finding an attractive man, attractive.

Shit. So the handsome guy Alex was lusting after was none other than the son of Rath Guerin, one of the two founders of Antar Inc. the company he started working at. Today. The potential for disaster was high, but one look at Chris in those tight jeans made Alex forget all about the risks of wanting the son of the company’s president.

“Hello to you too, Kyle. Maria, how are you?” Chris asked, throwing a smile at Maria that had her blushing in return. He sat on the other side of Alex with a brush of his fingers on Alex’s shoulder, and then it was Alex’s turn to blush.

The rest of the evening passed in a pleasant hazy blur for Alex. Despite the less than stellar start, Kyle managed to warm up to Chris, who was all around charming and funny. And at the end of the night, he placed a hand low on Alex’s back to ask him if Alex could walk him back to his car.

Standing in the parking lot’s semi-darkness, surrounded only by the dark landscape of the New Mexico desert and the loud noises of the Pony, Alex felt like he was walking on sunshine. Even though he hadn’t expected to run into Chris that night, he was glad at how well he fit with his friends, and now he hoped to end the night with a kiss.

Chris played with his sleeves for a moment, before looking up and smiling at Alex. “I had a good time tonight. I think your brother finally likes me.”

Alex laughed, “yeah he doesn’t always trust the guys I want to date.”

“Oh? Are you saying you want to date me, Alex?”

Alex stumbled, trying to recover quick. “Uh, I mean, I don’t have- we don’t need -”

Chris kept smiling as he got a hold of Alex’s jacket lapel and pulled him close. “I guess this counts as the first date then,” he said softly, his eyes moving down to Alex’s lips.

Alex’s heart was thudding in his chest. He like he was on fire everywhere his body touched Chris’ body, and his eyes couldn’t move away from his lips. Alex wanted to kiss him so bad.

“If this is a date,” Chris starts, “can it end with a kiss?”

Instead of responding, Alex grabs his face and kisses him. The kiss was everything Alex wanted, and yes he may not have any idea what he was going to do the next day when reality dumped ice water on his head, but tonight, in the arms of the handsomest man he’d seen, Alex felt like all his dreams were coming true.

#roswell new mexico #malex #malex fic #brief alex x oc #alex manes #kyle valenti #maria deluca #chris guerin #michael guerin #my fic #my writing #this part does not have malex #but the next one will

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kingdomheartsgifs · 7 years ago

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Tetsuya Nomura’s Interview with Gamespot. You can tell how much he truly loves this franchise.

Kingdom Hearts 3 has been in development for quite a few years now. How does it feel to finally have a release date announced?

Until now the thing that I was told the most was to just release the game, like, "Don't worry about it, just release the game," or, "When is the release date?" So now that we [have] arrived, to finally be able to say our release date or announce a release date, I feel that they gave me the opportunity to actually say what I want to our fans and have them listen to what I want to say. So I'm really happy about that.

Did it feel like you always needed to do more to achieve what you want or was it just the case of development issues that resulted in the lengthy development time?

Just one year into development we had to change the engine that we were working off of. This was a directive from the company that set us back a year and that was definitely a blow that we took. And then as we started development after that, we were gradually increasing the number of staff we had on our team, but the increase in staff just did not go as I had planned, so we couldn't really get full momentum for a while. So it's not that we had difficulty in development of the title, it was just a lot of company decisions that we just couldn't avoid.

Given how long the game has been in development, fan expectations for it are incredibly high. Do you ever worry about not meeting those fan expectations and how does that impact you as you're developing the game?

I just naturally don't really feel pressured and that's always been fortunate for me. That's been leading me to successes, but at least for Kingdom Hearts 3 the fan excitement was a lot more than I had expected. So [for] the first time in my life I did feel some kind of pressure from it. But when I thought about why I didn't really feel pressure until now, I realized that it was because I always had the confidence that my game is going to be good and fun. Because I have confidence that Kingdom Hearts 3 will be great as well I think that's probably why I don't feel too pressured or I don't feel too scared about fan expectations or meeting expectations.

I also have experience working on Final Fantasy titles as well, but Kingdom Hearts is a very unique one where a lot of people that are on the title really love Kingdom Hearts 3. They're overflowing with love. They're just like our fans as well. So because their love towards the title is so high, they've been creating the game with that much love and so I think that we are able to push out a game that meets expectations or even more than what you might expect.

You've grown up as a person and as a designer alongside the players and it's been so long since the last Kingdom Hearts was released. How has your perspective on making the game changed over time? Do you still have that passion for it? Or is it just like you feel more of a responsibility to people to make it and end it?

I'm getting older now, so my body really can't take all that difficulty anymore. When I was younger I was definitely more aggressive and I was the one pulling everyone forward, but now there's a lot more energetic staff around me who are more aggressive, so I feel like I'm more like a sage now. Like I'm in the sidelines just telling people what to do. The Kingdom Hearts series has become a huge title nowadays and back then it was more like I was making it secretively in the corner, but now that a lot more people are involved I do feel that it's not my title anymore, it's everyone's title. And just talking about all this … It actually kind of makes me really sad.

People are putting a lot of big things on you between making the sequel to Kingdom Hearts and the Final Fantasy VII remake. Is it a similar thing for that as well where you're letting other people guide you? Are you trying to train up the next generation to take over the things that you gave the world and created for Square Enix?

I'm not really good at teaching people, so I haven't been really telling people what to do, how to make games, or how to do it best. But because of where I am right now, all the decision making is up to me and because I've had a lot of game creation experience, I can finally feel that I could actually decide on one thing and I could actually make myself stop from deviating from what I've already decided. In a sense, I think all that experience does help me to become more mature. But there's still a lot of things that I can't readily decide as well.

It's not that I've been educating all my teams, but the coder, Tai Yasue, has been with me so long that he knows what I'm looking for. He knows what I don't like and he knows if whatever he has on his plate is something that I can approve or not. In that sense, [it could be said] I have been educating him.

The staff that I have, they actually have this image of me that, "Oh, Nomura-san won't approve if it's like this. It needs to be better." They just have high expectations for themselves or they think that I have really high expectations for them. So when I actually go ask to see something early in development, they say, "Oh, I can't show it to you yet. It's not finished at all." So what they usually tend to do is that they would take whatever order I give them and just create something that's of a higher quality than what I've asked them to do. So if you look at the trailer, I think it's pretty apparent, but they have been pushing out things that are really high quality. I'm very grateful for that.

A lot of people that are on the title really love Kingdom Hearts 3. They're overflowing with love. They're just like our fans.

One of the big things that fans are responding to in the new trailer is Aqua and her seemingly falling to the darkness. A lot of people are quite excited and also showing trepidation about seeing that. Can you talk about the decision to change and grow her character in such a way?

First of all, I didn't really think that people would be the most surprised with Aqua. I did receive a lot of questions about her during interviews and I've seen that it's become a hot topic online as well. The way that I write my scenarios, I don't really have clear thoughts of what I'm gonna do at each moment. I always start off with having a goal at the very end and maybe have smaller goals in between that I know that I have to go through to be able to achieve that larger goal, and then I'll start writing scenarios that go in between to make sure that I reach that goal at those points. So it's an ongoing process for me, but while I'm writing towards those smaller goals, I already know what happens, so in my mind I already have this expectation of what will happen next. But once in a while, I will come to a point where I would actually want to go against my own expectations and that's basically why Aqua became like that.

In another interview you said the reason why it's shocking to other people is because they don't know the path that you've created and you know where it's going to end, so you know how to get there. How far have you created that path? This is supposed to be the end of Sora's story. Do you have another story that goes beyond this or is this the end for you as well?

The way that I make games is that while I'm creating the current title, I'm always thinking about what's ahead of that. That hasn't changed from [the first] Kingdom Hearts, so it's the same for Kingdom Hearts 3 as well and it's all in my mind. But that doesn't mean that we will be able to create that game or we will eventually create the next game. I do this so that it doesn't contradict what I see in the future of Kingdom Hearts. Like I said earlier, it's just not that it's a definite yes or no as to whether or not there will be [another Kingdom Hearts] title, but I do have something in mind.

We've seen a lot of new characters and returning favorites, but we haven't really seen a lot of the Final Fantasy characters and obviously they played such a huge role in the earlier games. Are you just not showing them off right now or do you feel that you don't need to bring them back for the new game?

They obviously appeared from [the first] Kingdom Hearts, but at least for Kingdom Hearts 3, there's going to be a lot of [original] Kingdom Hearts. So most of the main characters from the Kingdom Hearts titles will appear and they will all have their problems that they need to resolve in the game. Because of that, Final Fantasy characters that actually do not have problems of their own … it's just a little bit difficult for them to appear in the game. But, obviously, the trailers that we have been showing until now is not everything. So all I can really say to that is just wait for a little more update to that.

Actually, in interviews throughout E3, I think every single interviewee has asked me about Final Fantasy characters and so I realize that that probably means that everyone's actually looking forward to them. There weren't that many titles out in the world that had all these Final Fantasy [characters] comes together in one [place], but nowadays there's just so many games out there that incorporates all these different Final Fantasy characters together, so I actually felt that it might not even be necessary to have another one of those in my game. But now that I've been talking with everyone, I've realized that maybe it is necessary, so I'm a little surprised by that.

Returning to Aqua and changes made with her, is that something that you want to do further with other characters? Do you want to kind of change perspectives on characters and maybe turn things upside down in the same way that you did with Aqua so people aren't as comfortable with everything?

It's not to say that there will be similar situations for other characters as Aqua, because I think that actually if I did that too often in the game, it will just lose the surprise element or it'll just feel very boring. But I can say that there will be a lot of surprises in the game, and future trailers may reveal it, but there are some surprises in there that I don't even know if it's okay to even put it in a trailer. Maybe we should just leave it in the game without revealing it beforehand so it'll be like a surprise in the game. I think all I can really say is to just please look forward to that. But let's say, so it's not like I'm changing your perspective on a character or not, but there will be some moments in there that you will definitely be surprised.

One of the other major questions people have is: are there limits to the characters you can now pull from, because Disney is changing massively and there's new characters being added to their roster. We now have Star Wars characters and Marvel characters [at Disney]. Are they [franchises] that you can pull from?

So Star Wars and Marvel are under Disney, but they are a completely different company, so it's just completely different. It's not that we could just freely ask for those characters as well. And I do get asked this questions once in a while, as well, but even to have Pixar characters in Kingdom Hearts, they actually started negotiating for it over 10 years ago. It wasn't like a simple ask and it took that long to [get to where] we're finally able to realize it. Currently, there's really not an option for me to use [Star Wars and Marvel characters].

If you were given the opportunity to have a Star Wars or Marvel character and you would granted it instantly, who would you pick?

If I answer to this question, I think a lot of people will actually be like, "Oh my God. It's confirmed. It's going to come," but it's not like that. But just simply as a character, I really love Tony Stark.

The game was recently delayed and it was a message that was delivered at a concert to fans first. Can you explain a little bit about why the delay was revealed that way, and can you tell us what state the game's currently in and why the delay was necessary?

As for the reason why we announced it at the concert, it was because this title is a multi-platform title, and so we wanted to be fair to everyone, and so that is why we decided to announce there. As for the reason for delay, because we really wanted to release the game as simultaneous as possible, this was a big request from our overseas team, our Western teams, so we had to think of that for this title. Until now, we would decide on a release date for Japan, and then the rest of the world would follow, so we would only have to think about situations in Japan. But now that we're looking towards a global release, we have to think of distribution and software production lines in global terms. If it was only like about 10,000 or like 50,000 units, then I think it would have been a little bit more of a simple matter, but since we're trying to produce more at once, we really had to think about those issues.

For instance, like one country might be able to distribute a game towards the end of the year, but another might not be able to because of their holiday season. So the higher-ups actually were very cautious about this, and they really wanted to make sure that we did not run into any issues, and so that is why we decided that this date that we have is the safest to be able to achieve a global simultaneous release, or as close as possible. And of course, with developers, it's much easier to push the release date a little back than to make it earlier, and so that is why we decided on this date.

Kingdom Hearts means a lot of things to a lot of people. For some, it represents their childhood or it's a story about friendship. What does Kingdom Hearts mean for you?

It's probably the title that represents who I am. When I was a starting as a developer, like I wasn't an industry veteran yet, when I was creating Final Fantasy titles with Mr. Sakaguchi, the father of Final Fantasy, and at that time, he said that Final Fantasy is a game that has everything in it. I don't think that there are that many people left in Square Enix that have actually worked with him on Final Fantasy. Of course, Final Fantasy is still continuing on--they still are committing to push out titles. But when I started creating Kingdom Hearts, that was when I kind of had this time away from Final Fantasy. And of course, I am working on a Final Fantasy title right now, but it was at a time when I was not working on a Final Fantasy title, and I really wanted to realize what Sakaguchi-san said about Final Fantasy, that it is a game that incorporates everything, to Kingdom Hearts. So I brought that idea to Kingdom Hearts. Currently looking at the newer Final Fantasy titles, to be honest, I don't think it really incorporates that idea of having everything. So I think that Kingdom Hearts, to me, is a game that has everything in it.

(x)

#kingdom hearts #tetsuya nomura #aqua #Kingdom Hearts III

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jestbee · 2 years ago

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i agree with what you’ve said about this situation and about quackity. though i will add, whilst we will probably never know who came up with what first, we do know that regardless of that, quackity kept everything to himself. he told no one about the qsmp or the qsmp’s real time translation. so it’s impossible for dream to have ‘copied’.

and i’m not say quackity copied either. though there’s more wiggle room for speculation about that considering dream announced his first (still too quick for a whole mod to be made) but also there is overlap between qsmp members and people who may have known about dream’s mod. most notably bad (he most definitely knew because of the hot wings stream question and he is also on the qsmp and may have brought it up offhandedly to quackity- who knows?)

Look, I'm not saying one way or the other, but everything you said is only when/how they said stuff publically. You say Q didn't tell anyone anything, but you mean he didn't tell us, or maybe he said he didnt tell anyone. But the fact is, he clearly has a team working on this. It's not a one-man show, Quackity isn’t a coder, and we don't know when he came up with the idea. We don't know what friends he mentioned it to before actively working on it or during. We don't know anything.

I do know know that acting like no one knew literally anything at all makes a very good spin for launching a project. Especially one where the marketing campaign is teaser images and mystery about what the project even is. That doesn't mean no one knew anything behind the scenes for real; it's just the story we're told. It's content.

Dream announced the live translation to us first, but Q hinted at it being part of his plan for qsmp before that if you interpret his comments that way, still too early for anyone to know what it was or for Dream to have copied it but still, it was in the works. I don't know if Q brought up his release date, I don't know if Dream did. I don't think theres any malicious stealing, I'd like to think they're still friends, but we literally don't know. We see such a small fraction of cc's lives, and they literally only tell us what they want us to know, so using that stuff like it's all the facts is just pointless and wrong.

All the speculation you're doing right here, without citation, without actually having concrete proof of who knew what and what was planned when, it's just not helping anything. /nm

There are literally a million scenarios of what could have happened, but we have zero way of knowing what that is unless they tell us. I think the theorising is what's causing the issue in fandom right now, and that's why I wish both sides would address it.

Dream has given his side of the story, Q has ignored it entirely. Make of that what you will.

#jane answers #mc

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rejectedathena · 7 years ago

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I STARTED THIS IN OCTOBER

This is for @dramaticcorgis birthday, which was in January OOF (I’m a mess)

*Coran is the art teacher and zarkons empire is a rival school (empire academy- their mascot is the Purple Iguana)

SPORT (or main interest)

Lance- Swim team

Keith- how long he can go without sleep

Hunk- Culinary arts

Shiro- football (captain & star quarterback )

Pidge- softball (3rd baseman)

Allura- softball (pitcher)

OTHER INTERESTS

Lance- Drama (this boy loves theatre with a passion), emo gazing (Keith is so hot OML), going to football games (Shiro is almost a bigger hunk than his pal Hunk *slight drool*)

Keith- going to see plays/theater performances (he won't admit it to his BFF Shiro but he loves them only for Lance), LANCE (he fucking loves this boy sm it's not even funny he would give his soul for that man and his THICC thighs)

Hunk- he loves baking (wants to be a chef), he loves to sleep when he can, he plays soccer (it’s exhausting), he loves lance (not romantically) especially going to the city carnivals with him -their funnel cake is the best in town and there is always some new food to try- he sometimes drags pidge along if he thinks she is too stressed over her homework or a new tech project

Shiro- he loves to spend time with Keith (he won't admit it, but he has a MAJOR crush on his friend) HE IS FUCKING WHIPPED (would jump off a bridge with/for that emo), he has a similar interest in Lance that is less extreme and is always happy when the boy makes it to his games (he performs better because he is a show off)

Pidge- LOVES TECH(duh), she is always put in charge of the yearbook organization (making sure everything is together/all pictures are in), she joined the robotics club and instead of making her own(oh please she could do that at home if she wanted to) she leads the club explaining how to do it and helping with technicalities and issues, in a relationship with Allura and loves her to death (they go off campus for “coffee” dates- tea for Pidge, hot chocolate for allura), hunks cooking could sustain her for years and she would never get bored of it

Allura- loves Pidge with a passion (her gf is so cute *squeaks*), she loves animals and helps out at shelters, rides horses on her grandparents farm (she took pidge with her once and they shared a horse), all of pidges friends are hilarious and lovely

BACK STORY

Lance- Has loved drama and swimming since he was a kid. He took to the water like a little fish and could glide through the water as easily as one. He had always enjoyed acting and theatre, plays especially. Every year he would participate in the school play and always got a lead role because he was a natural. Now that he is in high school, he struggles to keep up with dama practice, swim meets, and friends. He thanks Hunk every day for reminding him what the homework is because if he’s not going over lines in his head, he is remembering a new stroke or technique that the coach taught them in practice.

Keith- He has been living without a parent in the house since he was about 5 years old, his mom passed away tragically and his dad started to neglect him, leaving the house for hours, which turned into days, until one day he didn't come back at all. Once someone found out what happened to him, he was put into the foster care system, where he met Coran who adopted him as a son and helped him accept himself for who he was. He started going to the school Coran worked at (Coran is an honors biology teacher)

Hunk- His parents moved them from the Polynesian islands to America (legally) before he was born so he has dual citizenship in both places. He is well in touch with his culture but also enjoys parts of life as an American teen, like soccer, which he picked up from the kids on his block. He learned how to cook from his dad and because he liked watching cooking shows when he was younger and hoped to one day create delicious food that he could share with all his friends just like the people on the shows. He met Lance in culinary class in middle school and they have been friends ever since. He is in charge of reigning Lance in during homework sessions and figuring out what the homework is in general, but that's okay because he knows his friend is busy.

Shiro- Has known Keith since he was 7 after he moved in with Coran who lived down the street. They would play together a lot and grew to be best friends. He had always been interested in football and joined his school’s team in middle school before become the star quarterback in high school due to him bulking up during puberty. He managed to fracture his nose and they had to do surgery on it. Due to the location of the injury they had to cut across his nose. He managed to open the wound a second time and it caused it to scar terribly.

Pidge- Loved hanging out with her father who is a aerospace engineer and coder for NASA and her brother who was learning to pilot air and space crafts as well as coding like his father. She is shy with the other kids and when her dad and brother go missing mysteriously one day, she closes herself off from the other kids almost completely and focuses on learning the codes her brother and dad had almost finished teaching her when they disappeared. When she meets Lance and Hunk the first time in culinary class and they help her figure out her crush on her favorite teammate, Allura, she decides maybe having some friends isn't so bad, plus she’ll need a lot of help figuring out how to ask out the beautiful girl now that she knows she likes her.

Allura- has been pitching since she could walk (if not before, her dad loved baseball a lot) when her mom died when she was 12, it really made it difficult to deal and she threw herself into softball, pitching got rid of some of her anger at forgetting to say goodbye the last time and all the regrets she had surrounding her mom’s death. Her dad died right before she entered high school and so she had to deal with that loss over the summer, hoping therapy would help her cope and moving in with her grandparents. When she signed up for the softball team to make her dad proud and saw tiny shy Pidge she freaked out (what a cutie). When they started hanging out outside of practice, she started to realize how much this tiny ball of salt meant to her and was so happy when Pidge asked her out.

SHIPS

Pallura

ShKLance

#shklance #pallura #voltron #high school AU #athena writes #happy birthday

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konnoutagoewa · 7 years ago

Text

The Big O

Early 2018.

By order of President Trump (aka "Big Orange"), American server owners were allowed to charge money for access to their servers - an action which became famous as "the death of net neutrality". Soon, prices sky-rocketed, making the Web a place exclusively for the richest of the rich. The rest of the population rebelled against the loss of their freedom, but were suppressed by armed forces, resulting in a large-scale rebellion against the government that quickly spread around the globe's World-Wide-Web citizens forced to emigrate to the darker ends of the Internet. "Nerds", previously bullied for their interest in automated technologies, quickly rose as national heroes, being the only ones with the knowledge to oppose the orange forces.

Years later . . .

Trin didn't need her eyes to type. In fact, with the speed her fingers were moving over the keyboard, no eyes could help her do it any better. Thus her eyes were glued to the screen, dashing over the numerous data that flowed over it, with her glasses reflecting it in the otherwise mostly dark room where her keyboard resounded. A faint light seemed to dare that reflection from the other end of the room, flickering brighter from time to time, showing how much data passed the little computer it was attached to. But Trin didn't need to look at it - amongst the tons of information that were on her display, she could fish out the state of the Raspberry Pi in less than a moment. Yet her interest was dedicated to a completely different server - one far away from her, and one that she was not precisely expected to have access to. That surely made it significantly harder for her to access it and get the information she wanted, but ust because she wasn't expected to do so didn't mean she didn't have the right to - or the abilities.

Her fingers stopped moving.

"They are using UNIX?!" she shouted in the small, dark room. "What the hell . . ." she added on to it with a whisper and a grin. The system she turned out to be faced with was a spinoff of her favorite system that used to be made through the efforts of many, many freelancer coders and, with the downfall of internet freedom, went crashing as well - soon becoming illegal and replaced by the much more monolithic and useless Windows system, made off the money they gained from forcing people to use it. Nonetheless, most of her computers ran a very similar Linux system, in its core elements the same as every other Unix - it was flexible, it was fast, it had all the tools she could ever need, and most of all, it allowed her to remain quiet and unnoticed - quite vital traits for someone with her way of life.

Knowing what she was working with, the rest became fairly easy: she knew every bug, every backdoor, every little hole in her favorite system and, with a version of it made specifically for forcing such holes open, she proceeded to force her way into the much wankier distro that ran the server she was attacking. Considering her economical status, she would have needed to wait for 50 years before she could access it, but such numbers meant little if you weren't following the law.

Grinning from the thrill of breaking the law, which Trin did daily anyway, she passed a few more arguments into the black rectangle on her screen. A few moments later, the prompt changed. She snickered and started navigating the server, which was now completely under her control. After going around a bit it occurred to her it might be too bothersome to download data from a server via bash, the default language of both computers, while the server was still running, so with a few keystrokes, she switched to SQL and, now in a fitting environment, needed less than a minute to find the files she was ordered for.

Because yes, despite being a hacker and an anarchist, she still had to work, yet she did so with pleasure. Her current job was to publicly release data on molesters from the old times when there were still poor people on the Web to be molested. She didn't have an account for the social network she was hacking, but she had heard of it - after all, "Tumblr" was one of the social networks most influenced by Big Orange's actions. Yet that didn't matter - she did her job, she got paid, and that's all she needed to know. Not that she didn't keep records of all her jobs - it had saved her life a few times already, and why change a bad habit?

The good thing was that the data she was looking for was stuff like IP addresses, user names, etc - the kind of information saved in metadata, which was pretty much everywhere. And Trin had asked for a sample post when receiving the job, so searching for that and exploiting the return value was such a simple approach that she nearly felt like she had scammed off her customer - not that she would give the money back just because the job was easy . . .

Contemplating on the low security of the server, she piped the data download to multiple dedicated servers (read raspies-in-trash-cans-that-she-connected-to-the-internet-beforehand-just-in-case-you-know). It meant that the data would be downloaded on the raspberries instead of her main computer, which in turn meant she couldn't be tracked that easily. It took a while, during which she stared at the screen blankly - if something was going to fuck up, that was the time for it.

Nothing fucked up.

Proud, she disconnected her main computer she had been using so far from the server, deleting her traces in the process, switched to the raspi that was still blinking shyly in the corner of the room and ran the same process backwards - yet this time, instead of random metadata about assholes from the last age, she made her little minions send little packages of scrambled code - every single one of them completely useless, yet put together they made a powerful killcode for the server. She liked the approach. Code golfing had always been a hobby of hers, and let's just say, she also just enjoyed wrecking servers. She originally set up the raspies for DDOS attacks (every single one of them annoying the server until it can't keep up and crashes), but it turned out these could be easily tracked and her home system could do it better anyway, so she started using scrambled killcodes instead. And she was quite proud of the results.

With the server wrecked, she connected to her raspies instead, downloaded the data for the catalogue from there instead, and disconnected again. Job well done, now she just had to wait a bit and find a place to publish it, then get paid - and hope the little ones weren't discovered beforehand. The police had managed to get a few of her minions in the past, but after running apt update, it became too hard for the rather dumb Informatics Technologies Crime Department to keep up with the rather old updates. Still, as someone living on the edge, she had to consider all possibilities, even if all she could do against them was to pray. Not that she wasn't an atheist . . .

Trin stood up from her chair and stretched. It had been a long day she had spent on her computer, and she hurt all over. "God, I might just go by foot tomorrow . . . " she said to the empty room. Tomorrow was Thursday, her day for making deals in real life. Years ago, when she was still burning with a fire for rebellion, she had bought herself a motorbike and, despite it being quite old and rusty now, it helped her move around from place to place when she had to - for example, on Thursdays.

"Oh. Fuck . . . ", she whispered to herself. Thinking of Thursdays, she remembered she had another job to do. Quickly going through some of the drawers on her table, she found an empty memory card and put it in her computer, turning the chair around so that she could just lean on it instead of sitting down again. This job was much easier - she just had to find some files and deliver them directly, no hacking, no DDOSing, no onion routing. Even better - the "files" were one of her favorite series that she even occasionally rewatched, so she didn't even need to find them - she had already down loaded them years ago. In fact, Trin really wanted to talk about it with the customer - there weren't many people she could relate to and spend time with - but again, work politics were important when living like her. She sighed - being an outlaw hacker was cool and all, but it had some drawbacks. How did she wish that she could one day just meet up with someone for a coffee and chat about books and banned Internet series and politics and Linux kernels and bot networks and homemade ISAs and how often she forgot that memory cards were pretty much instantaneous but she forgets it so she keeps waiting for them and then dozes off thinking about coffee dates. Like now, for example. She ejected the card ("Don't want to ruin the goods now, do we?"), put it in her bag with thingies, and after a moment of contemplation about whether she had forgotten something again, put the computer to sleep again.

Again, she stretched, with a considerably deeper sigh this time. "I need a fucking shower," she decided after a short pause, and proceeded to take her tank top and shorts off. She liked hot showers to relax her muscles after a long sitting in front of her machinery, so we will leave her to relax for the night.

~~~

"Aaargh!", she shouted, first thing in the morning, and punched her alarm clock which had just been "brought to life". She had been considering setting the alarm to something else than Evanescence for quite a while, but had never bothered doing it. Until now. She coded at night, for Turing's sake, she couldn't just wake up at eight o'clo- "Fuck?!", she shouted at the clock, and jumped out of her bed immediately. Changing the song was one thing, forgetting to set the timer a completely different one. She rarely cared about waking up early or other such saintly narcissities, but she had one job this time, and she kinda failed at it.

She pulled up a map on her computer. Another good habit of hers was to never uselessly shut it down completely. "Okay so twenty minutes away, I won't make it, but it'll take about five with Bumbs, so what the FUCK AM I WASTING TIME FOR!", she shouted at her screen before hurrying off into the bathroom. Deciding teethbrushing was for losers who had the time for it, she tied her hair a bit more properly than usual - in other words, she did it - and hurried back to put some proper clothes on. Luckily, she wasn't very creative when it came to outfits, which meant she had been wearing the same outfit on Thursdays for a few years now so she didn't waste much time on that. Ready, she took her bag of thingies, dug out her keys, unlocked the front door, ran out, came back, put her fancy shoes on - a pair of punk army boots -, ran out again, then came back again, turned her computer off since she wouldn't need it all day, then went out for the last and final time that morning, and didn't forget to close and lock the door behind her.

"Bumbs," as she playingly referred to her motorbike, was still chained in the common garage where she had last left it. For an anarchaic district, it was better kept than most people would expect - if only because "anarchaic" had acquired the meaning of "moral". She unchained it, swung the chain around the steering bar, took herself a precious minute to put her headphones and the "N2-BMB" playlist on, then pulled her helmet over her (still surprisingly neatly arranged) hair, swung herself over the relatively thin frame of the bike (even after the death of net neutrality, making stuff from carbon fibers remained popular), pushed the key in and, after turning it with a roar, dusted off down the dark, dirty street in the foggy morning light.

~~~

Eva was getting worried. It was already past the time she had expected to be done by, but her contractor still hadn't shown up. She was planning on going - it would be pretty bad if she was late for work - but on the other hand, she was dealing with an underground business, so she wasn't sure what were the consequences for not keeping her end of the deal. She looked at her watch and decided to wait another five minutes before leaving the old, loud, plastic-smelling room that had once been a university's cantina, but was now used as a meeting place for underground deals. Even with the orange forces doing anything to oppose them, nerds had still managed to secure some places for themselves. This university, for example, had been a meeting place for them back in the times when internet was free, and it had remained one.

From the few noises that came from the neighboring street, one separated itself by getting much louder and then ending in an unpleasant squeaking. Less than a minute later, a very chaotically looking individual came in, with a camouflage jacket and their helm still on. With everyone's eyes on them (except maybe for a pair in the corner that was meant for dealing more erotic material), they took their helmet off to unleash a wild, long, curly hair over their freckled, round face. Some whistles were heard, but she ignored them and headed towards the desk. Since it was an anonymous meeting place, the middleman was important, yet he just looked at the card the wildly haired woman showed him and pointed her in the direction of Eva.

Eva sighed. It was about time. The woman approached her, digging for something in an overly big black bag that seemed to consist of countless belts and pockets and a large flap, seemingly made from an old sail (surprisingly, it actually used to be a sail once), that covered them whenever the owner of the bag wasn't digging in its pockets. As Eva watched it, it was flipped back over the bag, as the owner had found what she had been looking for. The woman stopped in front of Eva, took a second to get used to her client being half a head shorter, and reached out her hand, a small card laying in it.

"The goods. Sorry for being late."

~~~

Ping was from China. Most of his customers often assumed Ping was his real name, yet he had just chosen it because he found the bash command to fit the purpose of a middleman that connected Internet junkies in a dystopian world. He had been working with Trin for years, and had long grown accustomed to her frequent latecomings. Otherwise, he liked working with her - she was one of the best at what she did, and still had a sense of humor that was rarely seen in their world. He might have started hitting on her if he had been straight.

As usual, she came at the latest possible time. She showed him the card that was supposed to tell him who he was supposed to connect her to, and without even looking at it, he pointed at the blonde girl at the end of the hall - the person who had been waiting the longest. Trin looked at her and blushed.

"I ain't arranging dates, you'll have to ask her out yourself."

Trin shushed him and went away from the desk. They had met in a gay bar, shortly after Big Orange's idiotic order and a while before gay clubs ended up being forbidden as well. He knew her well enough to know what was going through her head.

The following was going through her head:

"For Bell's sake, I'm late again. I hope they haven't gone away. So, who am I- fuck is she cute. I wonder if . . . Ah, better concentrate on the job, I'm late enough as it is. She's probably straight anyway. Still, no harm in asking her out on a- wait! The card! Yea, I better find that card. Dear, I really have a lot in my bag. Where did I put it again? I think it was here . . . Yup. Funny how such a small thing was still so easy to find. Anyway, let's just hand it over and be done with- oh dear Torvalds, she's shorter than me. So cute! I'd totally have that coffee date with her . . . But dah, that's not my job. Give her the- wait, I should say something. What should I say? WHAT SHOULD I SAY?!"

"The goods. Sorry for being late."

Hesitantly, the short, fair-skinned woman reached for the little chip in the hacker's hand and picked it up with her pinkishly lacquered nails. "Well, you are pretty late . . . it's very small, are you sure that's all I asked for?"

Trin shrugged with a jolting movement. "It's 32 gigs, you know. You could write the soundtrack once more onto it. And you'll still have space left over." Eva pouted her lips, colored to fit her nails. "I didn't ask for the soundtrack . . ." Trin forced herself to a grin. "There was free space?"

For a few moments, the two women looked at each other, slowly blushing. At about the time most people would start sweating furiously, a small LED started blinking on Eva's slim silver wristband, reminding her that she didn't have much more time left to complain in. She jumped slightly, startled by it, tapped it gently, after which a gentle display lit up in the air above it, which she started manipulating with her thin fingers.

Something in Trin's heart twitched. They might have been around for about as long as her, but holographic displays still fascinated her. Such small things, yet graciously bending both light and matter to create elaborate miniatures that disappeared with a blow of the wind . . . yet slowly and surely, her eyes wandered a bit further up from the tiny wonder of engineering.

"So um . . . sorry, but I'm kinda running late, you know, what with you being late and all . . . we settled for 20 dollars, I'll just add another 10 for the soundtrack . . . then, 30 dollars for the first four seasons and their soundtrack, would that be a deal?" Eva looked up to the much taller freckled girl whose hair kept her shaded. Trin just kept staring into her person of interest, still a bit too oblivious to the question.

"Yes?" Eva bowed a bit and looked into Trin's eyes. Trin jumped back with a shout. "D'AAH!"

The eyes of even the shadier corners of the hall were now on them. Trin hid her face behind her hands out of habit, then played it off by combing them through her still wild hair.

"Um. 20 dollars, was it? The soundtrack is on me . . ." she left one hand on her head, just for reassurance. "As I was just saying . . . whatever, twenty be it." With another few quick movements, Eva once more corrected the value on her dial, then reached it out to Trin, who blinked at it, confused.

The hacker knew what a wireless check was, of course. She had had the opportunity to hack them many times, and didn't even really need to be in its proximity to make it work. The hand that the device was on was a different matter, though. Despite her job, she still had trouble with people, and even as a child of the "introverted millennial generation", she was still exceptionally shy when it came to physical contact. She preferred to perform transactions in BitCoin, and to let Ping handle whatever required physical contact. Yet even with modern technology, transferring 20 gigs of data was a bit hard to do, at least if she wished to remain unnoticed. So despite her deepest instincts, she had forced herself to come over physically - and was now faced with an even deeper instinct of hers that got significantly less chances to shine.

"I uh . . . I think I'd prefer it to . . . um . . ."

Eva raised an eyebrow, thinking of the steadily increasing number on the silver ring. "Yes?" She observed as her partner slowly reached a hand out for hers and, impatiently, grabbed it herself- "Aah!" - causing a shreak of surprise in the still unsure hacker. "Look, I don't have all day to loose. Cool, you don't like me, you're weird, I get it, now just take my money because I really have to go!" With each word, the shorter girl's voice had become louder, until she was nearly screaming at her provider. With trembling hands, the hacker was thus forced to face her anxiety and put the lightsaber-like rod she had had in her back pocket for a while on the thin bracelet's dial. If her mind wasn't getting overstressed with anxiety, it might have occurred to her that Eva couldn't possibly know what a lightsaber was.

"Some other weird hacker stuff? "

"Um, yea . . . third party routing . . . otherwise, it can be tracked with much more ease . . . "

"Isn't blockchain based on the idea that everyone can route it?"

"Kinda . . . "

Trin couldn't bring it over herself to tell the girl she found it hard to talk without crying. At least her hacker's reputation gave others the impression that she knew what she was doing (more often than not, she was just winging it while jamming to "Three Days Grace"/"Hollywood Undead"), and thus Eva didn't ask her again what she was doing. The actual reason why Trin was using third party routing was that, while blockchain was indeed the main transaction method nowadays, all state-issued "SilverChain" devices were carefully tracked by that same state. And since Eva was using precisely one of these, Trin knew she could get in a lot of trouble if she didn't go the extra few moments to route it properly. Eva seemed to mind.

"Did I mention I don't have time?"

"I'm . . . it just finished anyway. So um, have fun watching it? Hope you come again . . ."

"Aha." sighed Eva. Without long goodbyes, she nodded at Trin and went away. "And be careful with it!" shouted Trin after her, not receiving a reaction.

~~~

"I mean, you were quite late again . . . maybe actually set your clock next time?"

Trin took another sip from her coffee. She had a Thursday ahead of her, and if she wanted a job, she had to stay away from alcohol. Thanks to Ping's subtle interventions, she hated drinking it anyway, yet he still proved to be a good drinking buddy, even if only for coffee.

"That aside, can I borrow your bots sometime soon?"

"What for?"

"This guy said he needed some routing for some large files, and I thought we could distribute it over your net . . . "

"What files?"

"You know I can't ask for that."

"Can't he just encrypt then and ssh them over?"

"You could try doing that, you know. I'd give you his contacts, but he wanted to remain anonymous, so I'll have to ask before that."

"And gender somehow doesn't count as personal data?"

"I never said he's a guy?" Trin raised an eyebrow. "Fine, you got me. Ain't telling you anything else, though."

"I can hack it myself if I cared."

"And get yourself blacklisted from my bar?"

" . . . eye for an eye, I guess. Assume I take the job - how much would I get?"

"A twentieth, risk factors and transport included." Trin considered it. A tenth of a bitcoin could allow her to renew all her electronics, state-of-the-art computer with at least basic quantum support and hydrogen cooling included, and maybe finally buy herself a bed. She was getting bored of her hammock anyway, she told herself, and assembling a bed would be fun . . .

"I refuse. Too risky."

"Said the girl who times how long she needs to hack the discontinued Oath Inc FreeBSD mainframe in Linkin Park songs?"

"Hey, hey, hey! Keep my gender out of this!"

"Sorry, sorry . . . "

Another hacker, recognizable by his large headphones covering the sides of his head, entered the bar and exchanged a few cards with Ping, who sent him to a nearby table. The "bartender" then spent a few moments on the console hidden behind the plot that had been locked until now.

"There's this girl who's looking for her . . . brother of a kind?"

"DNA sampling?"

"No, just IP7 address . . . "

"His?"

"Have a guess."

"Oh dear . . . "

"Should I tell her?"

"Don't bother, she'll figure it out herself soon enough . . . I kinda feel sorry for her, though."

"If it's important, she'll manage."

"I certainly hope so."

Ping wondered whether there was anything else to say.

"I guess you won't hack my servers to get the girl's data, right?"

"Why would I? It'll only give me her IP, but I could get that otherwise as well . . . "

" . . . I meant today's client."

"Oh."

"I shoudln't be telling you, but she seemed pretty straight."

"Are you telling me that based on her looks or her search history?"

"The latter, plus tests from her job application."

"Oh right, they reintroduced that shit . . . when was it made again? 1950?"

"Well they got the pupil cameras fixed . . . took them long enough . . . "

Another few moments spent looking at a screen and mourning the victims of heteronormative societies..

"Aah. Here's one for you."

"Lemme hear."

"Recovering WhatsApp conversations with ex."

"No way. I hate Erlang."

"Oh come on, it's just a language!"

"So is Malborge . . . "

Trin had long suspected Ping of having tried to learn "that one language" that had been specifically designed to be impossible to use, and his suppressed, choked laughter confirmed her suspicion.

"You gotta admit, though, it makes for completely foolproof programs!"

"Yeah, and I've never used nmap before."

A ping from Ping's computer pinged his attention, interrupting their line of puns. He glanced at it.

"Oh snap."

"What?"

"It's your customer from today, and she's not asking for a date."

"That sounds . . . bad?"

~~~

Eva came in right in time, which was bad. She technically had enough time to dress up and start work in the time given in the job description she signed three months ago, yet with a boss like hers, she had to be ready to start serving at least half an hour before. It wasn't legal to make her work with such a schedule, yes - but "legal" was a very varying term, set according to charisma of the workgiver, his (there were few hers in power) wealth, and last but not least, whose contacts he had on his bracelet. Her boss happened to have the contacts of a few of the more important inspectors at the constitution that was responsible for making sure politicians still had a "law" to refer to.

Long story short, she had to use the back door and dress in the toilets. At least she knew her boss wouldn't look for her there. He had installed cameras there and often misused them, which was the reason her female colleagues and her used the bathroom of the neighboring hotel whenever possible, but she took the risk - the consequences for directly disobeying his tyrant order were worse than having him see her undress. It wasn't right, but "righteousness" and "justice" were things that few believed still applied to women after Big O's rise to power.

Her bobbish haircut held back by a yellow hair band, a thick, uncomfortably sticky lipstick and makeup on her face, and such a revealing outfit that it didn't matter much whether she changed into it in the bathroom or not were the quick changes she had to adjust before going back out into the uncomfortably cold and gray corridors of the fast food building she worked at. She remained silent for a moment, listening for someone who might run into her and tell her boss and, after not hearing anyone close, tiptoed to her locker further down the corridor. Luckily, her boss was too greedy to pay for proper lockers, so there was no pad to register when she came in to work - a useful detail she and her colleagues had learned soon after applying.

Still on tiptoes, she ran past the "meeting room", mainly used by their boss to shout commands and molest his female subordinates, and stopped in front of the kitchen door. Beyond that point, anyone would be able to see her, and she would most certainly get noticed by the cook. So the question was, which cook was on duty? It didn't matter much, since she couldn't change much about it anyway, yet Eva tried to use every chance to calm her throbbing heart.

Leaning against the cold metal door, she was assaulted by all the noise going on early in the morning. Since the shift had already started, the kitchen was already working, and she could barely distinguish a silent whistle, accompanied by a deep hum and roughly following the melody of "Heartbreak Hotel". Eva sighed happily, creaked the door open and entered.

The slightly overweight, balding white man behind the grill who nonetheless still looked like in his thirties stopped turning the steaks and turned to her instead.

"Hi, Elvis." she whispered. Nodding with a smile, he beckoned her closer and whispered in return, "Irene is on the counter, so serve the back for a while first. Table 21 ordered a big coke less than a minute ago, bring that and check it with her. I'll be a witness if she asks when you came."

She gave him a quick hug and dashed off to the drink machine while he continued whistling where he had left off, quickly turning half a dozen steaks that threatened to start burning soon.

~~~

Eva had lost count on how many times she had convinced herself of Elvis' kindness. Most of the tables in the back had to be served, some more than just a coke. Yet from the Neo-nazis that shouted slurs left and right, and the businessmen discussing how to drench their employees of even more money, he had managed to send her to the only table that didn't pose any potential danger to her physical or mental health. Table 21 was occupied by a rather decent looking guy who seemed to be doing something very uncommon for his times - studying. Eva placed his coke down next to him, distracting him from the thick white book he had been engulfed in. "Oh, thanks," he mumbled, taking a sip from it. "Haven't seen you around?" he asked her, making her exchange her anxiety for confusion.

"Wha-, um, do you come here often?"

"Yeah, I study here a lot. I don't live far, but there aren't many fast food places near me, so I come here. The staff is nice."

Eva tried to pull her skirt further down, remembering that she tried that every day and still forgot how futile it was. The only place 'near by' that didn't have fast food restaurants and where you would expect to meet someone wealthy enough to study was the Manhattan - a walled-off downtown district, soaring to the skies where the rich bureaucrats and businessmen lingered in pleasures while the rest of the population had to find their place in the communistically designed slums that composed the rest of the city. While he seemed nice, Eva knew the boy could probably buy her as a dog and treat her as such, and get away with it without anyone batting an eye.

Yet again, her knees were trembling. She didn't have much of a life, yet for someone to be able to change hers at will frightened her. And she had good reason to be frightened, for very few with that ability cared to use it for the good of those whose lives were influenced.

Having noticed her lack of response, the boy turns to her, making it even worse. Threatening to fall, she grabs the table, supporting herself.

"Miss, are you alright?"

"Yes, yes, I'm fine. Just had a little trouble this morning, and it still seems to weaken me . . ."

Politely declining his outstretched hands, she turns to go back to the kitchen, only to see yet another horror. Having been distracted by her contemplation on modern society, she had not noticed the flashing blue and red lights, and only noticed the policeman when he was almost in front of her.

"Where is Brian Naille?"

"Whu, what?" she asked with a trembling voice, too distracted to understand his otherwise rather simple question. The officer, on the other hand, wasn't that understanding, and decided to shout in case it helped her - which it didn't.

"You useless slut, didn't you hear me?! Where! Is! Brian! Naille?!"

Eva had raised her hands over her head. Officially, the police was meant to protect the people, but everyone knew better than to pointlessly trust them and get killed in their own homes. And this specific example didn't seem to think much of her anyway.

She glanced to the kitchen. Elvis had that ability to him to calm people, yet behind the thick glass panels, he hadn't noticed anything yet. Which got Eva thinking: what was his real name again? The officer followed her line of sight and didn't need to think long. He went away from Eva, yet her knees didn't stop trembling. Waving his badge around, he entered the kitchen. Elvis finally saw him, and his peaceful expression was replaced by one of bitterness and hate, one no one knew he knew how to make. With a speed Eva didn't think he was capable of having, he lashed himself towards the officer who, also having not expected such agility or speed, didn't even move when the hot and oil-dripping spatula dug into the flesh of his face. Even behind the isolating glass, his shout was still well audible. Having scarred him for life, Elvis reached for the backdoor that Eva had come in through, yet the officer, having been frequently beaten at his training camp and unusually furious, grabbed for him and lashed him back, bringing him to the floor.

Despite her best attempt, Eva couldn't tear her eyes from the brutal beating that followed. A few lower policemen joined their boss on kicking down on the now defenseless cook, yet still restraining themselves enough to leave him alive - they'd need him alive in order to torture him in prison, they knew in their rather primitive brains. Nonetheless, they kicked for a while. Eventually, he had stopped moving, so they dragged his lump, bloody and disformed body through the corridor and out of the building.

Eva had fallen to her knees, unable to look away. Aside for her little purchase this morning, she had expected to have a normal day - getting shouted at by Irene, spilling a drink or two, getting slapped on her butt by clients who she had never spoken to, the usual abuse. But actually seeing someone getting beaten was too much for her. Sure, it was daily news to hear that someone close got beaten and imprisoned, yet seeing it happen right in front of her was a completely different story.

She looked around. Did it even happen? Or was it just another fantasy of her tortured mind? The clients had been excited, and now seemed content of the little show. Most of them had already gone back to their useless talks. She looked at the now empty grill. Blood still covered the marble white floor panels in front of it. The steaks on it were beginning to raise a cloud of black smoke, yet no one seemed to care much. It was not their job.

"Are you okay?" The boy reached a hand out for her again. "Did you know him?"

"I- . . ." her own voice choked her. She coughed it away, and started again. "I have to go."

~~~

Not bothering to give the employees a proper explanation, the police department had sent their boss the report. Brian Jackson Naille, or Elvis, as they called him, was fired on the spot, his records sent to the police for analysis and then deleted. His drawer was emptied - there were some clothes that got thrown away, and a few electronics got discovered that were also sent to the police. Apparently, he had trafficked illegal data about the new trackers that were soon to be made public, earning him a life sentence in jail - if he managed to even get there. He had earned himself a respectable loan, which ended in their boss' pocket.

Eva was given a half-hour 'break' - after cleaning whatever remained of him, she was free to spend the rest of the time as she pleased. She spent most of it puking in the toilet. She went back to pack the cleaning utensils, and involuntarily eavesdropped as Irene chattered to one of her vultures about why they got him. She went back to the staff room to pack said utensils, and remained in the toilet, playing with her bracelet. If they had caught him for smuggling such data, it would surely be easy to also track her conversation with Ping. The SD card that was still in her bra - she wasn't allowed much privacy - happily glinted when she took it out, innocent of the trouble it could cause her. She stared at it for a while before raising her hand again, activating the display. She had to warn them.

She didn't know anything about RSA - the unbreakable algorithm that her device was supposed to use instead of its way too simple substitution algorithm -, nor did she know much about routing. Yet she had already managed to get in touch with them once and, despite the insecurity of using the same route again, she opened up the chatbox from last time.

"A much needed plea from a silenced drudgess. In the dread of blood, a fleeting hope is all I beg."

She wanted to come up with something smarter, she knew she had to, but her overstressed brain failed to think with something aside for her addiction to poetry from when she was eight. Hoping that it won't be intercepted by the router that her boss was very keen on observing closely for precisely such complaints, she raised her hand again, breathed in, hoping to make it stop trembling, and pressed 'Send'.

~~~

Eva's eyes were closing. It had been at least an hour after her break was over, yet no one had come in to look for her. She had cried, she had crawled herself into a ball on the floor, she had almost started lashing out on the door, but held back, knowing that then someone would have come for sure. Now, she was just lying on the floor in her small gray cabin, not moving, not expecting anyone, just listening to the noises from the corridor - often steps, the occasional trolley, sometimes shouts for oil or another ingredient.

Certain steps grew louder. She could make the difference between most of her colleagues, but she didn't recognize those. They were heavier, sharper. Angry. Unlike the others, they were looking for something, and quickly rushed to the toilets after entering the corridor. The steps threw the door open, confirming her fears, and rushed to her cabin - the only closed one during work time. Eva was trembling again. If her message was intercepted, then even the stupid boss would have guessed why she had sent it, and would have called the police back to get her as well. Her life hadn't been that bad, after all - sure, she didn't go to university and was ditched at a roadside fast food place by her parents, but all things considered, it could have been much worse-

"Your name was Eva, right?"

She jumped up. The voice was slightly hoarse, but she was sure she knew it.

"We um, we have a policy to not look into our clients' personal data, but I kinda had to in your case . . ."

Eva unlocked the door and opened it wide. With the same old army jacket and an even wilder haircut that aerodynamically went down to her shoulders, Trin stood there and was still trying to catch her breath.

"Ping caught your signal, and I rushed here on Bum- uh, my motorbike," she explained briefly. "Get out before they notice-" she began again, but was interrupting by the auburn waitress hanging herself on her neck and starting to cry. "Um." was all she managed to add to it, reddening up again.

"Oh god bless you're here, I was so worried, they got Elvis for some data traffic and I knew they had tracked me too, god I was so worried but you came please please help me, help me . . ." she kept on, but soon her pleas were drowned in tears and snot and she had to sob silently, curled up on Trin's chest while Trin herself was busy caressing her hair and blushing heavily. "I um . . . I jammed the cameras, so we should have a bit of time to get out. I'll let you stay at my place, okay? You'll be save there. I promise."

Eva dragged herself up on her, holding her for another while before standing on her own. "Th- thank you," she managed to mumble. "No problem. We help whomever we can." Nonetheless, she leaned closer. "Honestly though, think before you contact us. You put yourself and all of us in great danger, you know."

"I know . . ."

To her response, Trin covered her face with her hands and thus muffed her shout that she gave off out of nowhere. It was Eva's turn to put on a worried face. "Is everything okay?"

"Stop being so fucking cute, I can't think properly!"

A couple of seconds of silence followed, disturbed only by the steps coming from outside. Trin took her hands off her face and pointed to the door with a serious face, yet her blush betrayed her. "I never said that. Now go pack your things and let's get out of here."

~~~

Eva didn't need much time to get ready. She took her jeans from her locker, pulled them on under the shirt without bothering to go back to the bathroom, took the rest - a jacket that she threw over herself, a notebook, a few cards that she used whenever her wristband couldn't fit, and a shirt that she wrapped them in before stuffing them in the jacket - and turned to the hacker. Trin had politely waited and after she was done, guided the way through the slowly thickening crowd of employees in the corridor towards the exit that Eva had come in through before what seemed like an eternity. The door was open - it had to be left so for "security reasons", yet no one dared to use it during work time. Bumbs was parked a bit further off in the parking slot of the building. Trin took a helm from the baggage compartment and handed it to Eva. "Give me your stuff and put it on." Eva did as told, letting Trin lace her shirtbag over her own portable computer in the box at the back end of the bike. Then Trin put on her own helm that had rested on the driver's seat, swung herself over it, and beckoned Eva to do the same. She had trouble doing so, having never even ridden a bike, but managed with a bit of help. "Name's Trin," her savior remembered to inform her. "Hold tight."

"Hold tight where?"

"Hug me from behind."

Even under her helm and the serious voice, Eva could still tell she was blushing. What an interesting woman, she thought. Not only an outlaw of such degree, but savvy enough with electronics to remain an outlaw for long. And she rode a motorbike. Eva didn't know what it was about motorbikes - they were loud, they were much more polluting than, say, public transport, and they were prone to breaking. But she had somehow always imagined being swept up by a guy with one of those bikes with the high steering bars and the many leather straps and belts. It didn't turn out as she imagined - and to be honest to herself, she had always known that she didn't really like such guys anyway - but having an outlaw friend that rode a motorbike sure looked like an interesting idea.

Her subconsciousness would have had something to say about that vision too, had it not been busy accommodating itself to the fact that Eva just used the word "savvy". It needed a while to process it. Had the day been calmer, it might have brought up a little detail about the outlaw's behavior that Eva had remained oblivious to.

She wrapped her hands around Trin and laid her helm on her army jacket. Seeing as her passenger was secured, Trin turned on the for Eva surprisingly silent engine, pushed the holder aside, and gently steered her bike to the main road. The jammer in the baggage compartment lost contact at about that distance, and Eva's boss was granted a pericular view over the ladies' dressing room and lockers, with no auburn Eva to be found.

~~~

Despite the clouded gray sky, it didn't rain. Trin drove into what was once a parking school lot and shut down the engine. "We're there." she said to her passenger. Eva took her hands off her and let herself be helped down from the machine. Ping had seen them coming, and was jogging towards them from the cantina building, looking mad. He didn't even bother looking at Trin when he reached them, instead he just grabbed Eva by the shoulders and shook her roughly.

"What happened to Brian?!" he shouted without warning. Trin threw her helm aside and grabbed him, pulling him away from the panicking Eva. "What happened, god damn it?!" he shouted again before Trin ripped him off her recently saved friend. "For Snowden's sake, Ping, she's under shock! Think a bit and leave her to calm!"

For a moment, she thought he was going to jump at her dear waitress again, but he bit his teeth together and held back.

"Apparently, the police caught word of Brian's dealings and went to arrest him. He was beat up pretty bad," she rewarded him for his consideration. He didn't like his reward. Instead, he started trembling just like Eva, shaking from anger and helplessness. Trin ignored him again and hugged her auburn companion, holding her tight to stop her shaking. "I know it hurts, and I know you don't want to remember it, but we have to know what happened, or it might get much worse." The now stable girl nodded guiltily and turned to Ping. Her lips trembled, but holding her savior's hand, she managed to speak.

"The . . . A cab had parked outside the door, but I was busy with a customer, so I didn't pay it much attention. The police officer came in and shouted at me, and I thought he would beat me or kidnap me, but he left me alone and went after the cook- "

"What was his name?"

"I, I don't- "

"God damn it, Evelyn, I have customers there!" He pointed at his bar. "And if you don't tell me what those damn officers know, they might die just like your cook! So who was he?!"

The now again shaking waitress looked up at Trin with a worried, questioning look. "He had to get your personal data so I could come to save you," she explained. Eva nodded, even more worried about how much they knew.

Yet one important thing they didn't know. Ping came closer and wiped his face with the sleeve of his shirt - he had tears in his eyes.

"Overweight white man with balding hair?"

"Yes, exactly. We, we used to call him Elvis, he always listened to those old songs . . ."

Ping had feared it and had held back his tears, but now that he knew, he had no reason to. Being the strong and serious man that he was, he didn't have much experience in crying, and it looked sobbier than usual. Nonetheless, he remained silent. Howling wouldn't help anymore.

"What . . . what happened?" asked Eva. "I . . . I will have to evacuate the bar," he managed to mutter. Trin stepped forward from behind Eva, still holding her arm for support - whose she didn't know.

"I'll take care of her."

"First, you will wait. Then you can do what you want."

As he had said it, he turned around and went to the bar. His feet were shaking and he nearly fell down a couple of times, yet he ran - he had to.

Eva wasn't trembling anymore. She had had enough of being worried, and found it increasingly hard to be worried, so she stopped. "How do you intend to take care of me, actually?" Trin was experiencing a similar emotional deficiency and failed to blush. "If you don't mind sleeping in a hammock, I could take you home with me . . ."

Eva raised an eyebrow. She had never been good at raising her eyebrows in any other emotion but fear, but she somehow managed. "You sleep in a hammock?"

"It's comfortable and easy to maintain. I have an extra sleeping mat, so I'll be on the floor." Eva considered the suggestion. Trin was an interesting woman indeed. Leaving aside the issue with loosing her hard-earned flat and earnings, Eva didn't regret having to live with her. "Well, you've read my records, so you know I have anxiety . . ."

"I kinda had to. Sorry."

". . . I don't know if I can do it."

The brunette with the messy hair turned back to face the somewhat shorter auburn. "You can. You've come this far, there's nothing to hold you back anymore." Lowering her head, Eva covered her chests with her hands. It was cold, and her outfit wasn't made for that weather. "That's . . . that's not true. You saved me."

Despite not being good at guessing other's emotions, a stroke of genius lit up Trin's mind. She took off her leather jacket, leaving herself in a pullover over a short-sleeved shirt, and draped her jacket over Eva, hugging her to compensate for what it didn't cover. It was Eva's turn to blush. "I couldn't have done anything if you hadn't called me. I may have a motorbike and sick nerd skills, but the bravery was on your side."

After a short contemplation, Eva decided she really liked that woman. She hugged her closer. "Trin, was it . . . for how long can I stay?"

"Uuummm . . . I lived alone, so I guess for a while . . ."

~~~

The two remained hugging each other for a while. Trin's ever-logical brain wanted to leave, but it knew Ping was coming, so it waited, leaving the emotional part of it to cuddle with her crush. Unsurprisingly, people started pouring out from the cantina and dashed to the parking lot, ignoring the two women and rushing to their vans, cars, motorcycles, bikes - one person even left on roller skaters. Eva had trouble guessing what gender that person was, but Trin knew it was neither of the ones she was thinking of. When everyone was gone, Ping came out as well, carrying a largish black bag towards them. Even from a distance, it was obvious he had cried. He seemed to be done with it, though, having regained his serious composure. He put the bag down next to them and started digging in the surprisingly low-tech tools that it contained. Eventually, he pulled out a largeish wire cutter and pointed it to Eva.

"Hold your hand out."

Eva was, for reasons obvious to everyone but Ping himself, very reluctant to obey. Trin grasped her wrist and pulled her closer to herself. "Your bracelet. I once had the honor to set up quite a complex jammer for Ping, but once we're out of reach, they can track you again."

With a proper explanation, she trusted Trin and let her hold her hand out while Ping cut the thin but surprisingly resilient band of silver away from her wrist. Once the heavy cutter was through, Trin gently peeled it from Eva's wrist, letting her examine the newly acquired blankness on her hand.

"It's so . . . empty? It feels weird."

Ping snorted, taking out a funny-looking baggie from his bag. Trin just grinned. "Kinda ironic how people find freedom weird . . ." Ping handed her the wire-coated baggie, and she put the silver band in it before closing it tightly and stuffing it in her bag. "It's a Faraday bag," she explained for Eva. "It's a small, handy version of my jammer. If we turn your bracelet off, we will loose data we might need later, so instead we'll isolate it until I can hack it safely at home." Then she turned to Ping and switched to a somewhat nerdier English. "You 'dd'ing your servers?"

"I have the data on a HDD stack. I'll have to shut it down and then I can pack it on the van. Can I ask you for a favor?"

"I'll inform the others, don't worry about that. Though to be honest, I think they know already."

"Can't hurt to be save. I'll go finish the setup, you have fun with the lady. I'd stay wary of the Paper Doll if I were you."

Trin gave him an odd, cold look, but still laughs at what seems to be a private joke to the unknowing Eva. After another moment, she lets go of her female friend and gives him a hug instead. "For Neumann's sake, Ping, don't die," she said, choking on tears. "I wouldn't be so worried about that, I know every hideout in this city."

"You know that's not what I meant."

After another moment of silence, he tapped her back. "Take care of her."

"I will."

Turning around and not looking back, he let go of her, took his bag, and went away again. Trin didn't wait either, picking up her helm from where she had thrown it earlier and handing Eva's to her new roommate who had silently waited out the confrontation. "Brian was Ping's boyfriend," she began explaining without being asked, "He was a data trafficker - he was also the one that sent you to us. If-, no, when the police finds the location of this place, they will come to ransack it just like they did your place, and we won't get to save innocents like you."

"What will happen to him?"

Trin seemed to choke. Her voice was certainly hoarser when she whispered "Don't ask."

Skillfully, she swung herself on her motorbike and helped Eva to climb on again. She even put her helmet on for her. "Keep my jacket on."

"Isn't it colder for the driver?"

"Keep it on."

Trin locked her own helmet below her chin and swung her bag in front of her - it was less comfortable for her, but more so for Eva. Having been beckoned, she hugged her driver from behind again. cuddling against her almost bare back.

"Eva . . . is it just me, or are you hugging me a bit more persistently this time?"

"Well you need a bit of warmth, don't you?"

Trin smiled and fired up the engine. Thinking back about it, she had indeed wished to be hugged like that when she first saw her. Sure, a few things turned out different than she had anticipated, but otherwise, she was quite happy with this Thursday.

~~~

Years later . . .

Gentle chants filled the room. Trin would have played something more norsic - there was a half-ancient band she had had in mind - but it wasn't her who chose what got played this time, so instead of her treasured Manowar, she was listening to the soft notes of the sharp Digital Daggers. Not that she didn't like them - as long as she could concentrate, all was fine with her. Her concentration currently had some trouble revealing a hidden solution to the gibberish that was displayed on her screen and that her eyes were captivated by. She had written it herself, and wasn't exceptionally happy with the result.

With a wisdom that had taken her a while to acquire, she leaned back. Straining herself wouldn't help, that she knew well. She stood up, stretched her tired back, and went to the kitchen. Despite what people often thought when seeing her going around with her shaggy clothes and haircut, she loved plants. Every window had at least one vase or can or anything that could hold water sitting in front of it, with plants ranging from bean sprouts to peace lilies to even a cactus that she picked up one winter out of fear it might freeze to death. Leaning herself on the window frame, she enjoyed the sun that came through and gazed on her little assortment of plants in front of it. Besides computers and books, she cared a lot for them.

Oh, and for another thing.

The circle plate in the middle of the iron apartment door turned, gliding the locking bar together and unlocking the door. With a bit of effort, the woman behind it managed to pull it open, bringing in the two bags of supplies she had brought. Trin took them from her and carried them in the kitchen while she was busy closing the door behind her.

"Oh, you brought asperges?"

"You said you liked them?"

With a smile, Trin started putting the food in their fridge. She hadn't been very concerned with eating habits until Eva came, and she could definitely tell her health improved altogether once the food got better.

"I think about boiling them with some potatoes on the side. It would probably be hard to boil them on a grill, but you have nice pots . . ."

While Trin enjoyed the voice, she wasn't precisely listening, so she didn't notice when Eva stopped talking and went over to Trin's computer. Just like Trin, she glanced at the screen for a while, and then started typing. She was still on it when Trin put the empty bags aside and went over to her side.

"What are you . . . doing?"

She stared while Eva finished typing and then proudly put her hands on her hips. "You have never been good with binary trees, were you?" Eva pouted, commenting on the somewhat recursive structure that Trin indeed never managed to use properly. The nerdier of them scratched her head. "I'm more impressed that you are . . ."

"I've practiced. Anyway, now that you're done . . ." She swung her arms around Trin, who lost her balance and started falling, and with Eva's help, the two ended up in the narrow hammock. " . . . we can cuddle, right?"

Trin was red again. "You little rat, abusing my computer like that!" She started tickling Eva, who twisted around in laughter. For yet another time, Trin convinced herself that she couldn't be mad at her auburn roommate for long, even if she tried.

They cuddled for a while. After moving in with her, Eva had had much trouble with panic attacks, and the closeness the hammock created helped her. Eventually, she just decided she liked to be packed close with Trin, and thus they didn't have to buy a proper bed, continuing to sleep in the somewhat overcrowded hammock that Trin had creatively hung on the thin walls with the help of Ping and a few thick logs. Surprisingly, it managed to hold the weight of the two women, in addition to the occasional swings and pulls that occurred whenever Eva played around in it or got tickled. All in all, it was a design worthy of respect that Ping had come up with.

Out of nowhere, Eva squeezed her roommate tighter. "Um . . . Trin?" The hacker patted her head. "What is it, sweetie?"

The auburn girl turned her face, rubbing it against Trin's chest and hiding in from her. "Have you ever . . . you know . . . wanted to . . . "

Her voice, quiet since she began speaking, shrank to a whisper. "Hey, I can't hear you when you speak like that. You can tell me anything, I won't mind."

Eva took a deep breath and started again.

"Do you want to adopt a child?"

~~~

A long silence followed. It was the kind of uncomfortable silence that you could feel sticking to you and choking you. Eva had feared it for a while.

"You know, I've . . . been thinking . . . because you know, I always thought that once I earned enough money to live properly, I'd find a boyfriend and have a family and the such, and . . . well, you aren't a guy, but I won't mind founding a family with you . . . and um . . . you know, I was thinking that, well, since there's no guy, we can't get pregnant, so we could, you know, adopt a kid, since there are many that need a family either way, and we don't necessarily need a child to be, like, biologically ours . . . "

She was interrupted by her friend's hand that she raised to her face. Scared, Eva looked up at her, to see that she was trying to wash away her tears. Still scared, she tried to continue, with even more confusion in her voice.

"I uh . . . I . . . I'm sorry if I brought up something bad . . . it's just that . . . you know, we've been living together for two years now, and I thought we could, like . . . "

Trin put her hand on her partner's shoulder, and she stopped talking. Despite crying, she managed to smile.

"It- it's okay. Sorry."

Eva hugged her girlfriend tightly again. "Don't be sorry, Trin, you did nothing wrong. I . . . kinda thought you've had trouble with your family, so I should have worded it differently-"

"No, Eva. It- it's okay. Really. I've . . . well yeah, they abandoned me when I was very little so I never knew them, but I don't regret it. After all, I got to be with you . . ."

Eva giggled. They were having a nice time indeed. Sure, most of it was spent working on computers and Eva had to use a raspie for a long time before Trin bought her a laptop - a slim white thing with hearts on the cover -, but most of all, they were together.

"So, my little romantic. Wanna go visit my old place tomorrow?"

"To- tomorrow?!"

"Why not? It's a Thursday, we have time, and if I heard right, you've wanted to do it for a while, right?"

Eva buried her head in her partner's chest. When she looked up at her again, she was red with smiling, and Trin went blushing as well.

"We are gonna need a bigger apartment."

"And a bed."

"Right, a hammock is a bad idea . . ." Trin commented through a yawn. As the two drifted asleep and had sweet dreams of each other, the computer kept gently lulling in the back.

" " "

When the moon is in the seventh hour, and Jupiter aligns with Mars, then peace will guide the planets, and love will stir the stars . . .

This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius, the age of Aquarius . . .

" " "

#writers of tumblr #dystopia #gay #hacker #surprise i finally finished something #i care a lot for this story #ave #net neutrality

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hereidinathoreauwrites · 5 years ago

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Chapters: 2/5 Fandom: Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Zoey Clarke/Joan Characters: Zoey Clarke, Joan (Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist) Additional Tags: it's the headcannon fic!, your #2 choice, two people start having sex for fun and oops they're in love, Women Loving Women, Developing Relationship, Boss/Employee Relationship, Bisexual Female Character, joan's pov, so I wouldn't have to deal with songs, Lesbian Sex, Fluff and Smut, Vaginal Fingering, Cunnilingus, Cuddling & Snuggling, Post-Coital Cuddling, From Sex to Love, Sex Toys, Bad Dirty Talk, zoey has a lot of emotions, but she doesn't want to talk about them, Joan is concerned but doesn't know how to ask

Ch 2: Make It Hurt So Good.

Rated M

Joan’s back hit the mattress and she couldn’t help growling softly.

Finally.

Zoey hovered over her, lips on her shoulder, fingers trailing along Joan’s thigh.

Joan’s breath caught at the action. She’d obsessed all evening; unsure how Millennials did hook-ups (was there wine? food? or just sex and vapes?).

But the second Zoey showed up, she realized it didn’t matter.

This wasn’t a date. It was just sex. No expectations. No obligation.

Zoey had certainly wasted no time in jumping right to it. If there was one thing Millennials could be counted on for, it was non-commitment. And Zoey was clearly putting no thought into any kind of relationship. Joan loved it.

It was a little scary actually, the shift that had taken place in the red-headed coder. From the second Joan had opened the door, guiding Zoey inside, the younger woman had been all business; immediately dropping her coat to reveal a skimpy black dress. Well, skimpy by Zoey’s standards. It honestly would have been the kind of thing Joan would have worn to a funeral.

“Bedroom?” Zoey had asked, a curious lack of trepidation in her voice.

Joan had only been able to gesture. Sure, she’d dressed up slightly as well (this sleek red number hadn’t fit her since her honeymoon) and had plenty of comments in mind. But the sight of Zoey in a dress like that was reminding her libido that satiation couldn’t be far.

They'd barely entered the bedroom before Zoey had stretched up to kiss her, hands already roaming.

Now Zoey was on top of her, all nimble fingers and hot lips.

Joan pursed her lips, already squirming. God, she needed this so badly!

But something was still niggling at the back of her mind; something that the last rational part of her could not ignore no matter how turned on she was.

Joan pulled herself back from Zoey’s incessant kissing. “Zoey…Zoey wait.”

The younger woman paused and pulled back slightly. Joan didn’t let her go far. She didn’t want Zoey to think she was having second thoughts.

“I’m so glad that you agreed to this…” Joan started, trying to wrestle the words out of her lust-fogged brain, “but I’m a woman of integrity and still in a position of power over you…”

Zoey tilted her head to the side. “What are you getting at?”

Joan sat up just enough that she could look the coder in the eye. “Zoey, I want to make sure things are clear between us: this isn’t a relationship.”

Zoey nodded, almost impatiently. “Fine with me.”

Joan absorbed her flippant tone, noting it for future dissection. “There’s no danger of retribution from me or any expectation of perks.” She assured her subordinate. Joan grimaced. “And we’re not going the 50 shades route with this…no contracts, no NDAs…I trust you to keep this between us.”

“Of course.”

“And if you ever want out, just say the word and we stop. No hard feelings, no change in our work relationship.” Joan smiled at her. “Okay?” She wanted Zoey to feel comfortable doing this. But a small part of her wondered if giving her that out was going to come back to bite her.

Zoey smiled back. “I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t down for whatever you wanted.” She assured Joan.

Joan reached out and rubbed Zoey’s shoulder, working the sleeve down slightly. “Careful, I’ll use those words against you…”

Zoey countered by leaning down and whispering in Joan’s ear. “I’m counting on it.”

Joan shuddered. God, how long had it been since someone had talked dirty to her? Too long if her reaction was anything to go by. That or just the idea of Zoey having a dirty side was way too hot.

“Now…” Zoey continued, arms sliding around Joan. “Can we cease with the talking?”

“Fine by me.”

Zoey smirked at her and pressed her lips against Joan’s. Her arms took position on either side of Joan’s hips and she slowly pressed her back onto the bed.

Joan’s hands drifted, wandering down slim hips to Zoey’s rear. Zoey let out a tiny moan.

All of Joan’s insides flared with sudden warmth.

Damn. How had she never noticed how attractive Zoey was before?

Probably because of the age difference. And her tendency to keep the younger woman at a distance prior to her divorce. She’d assumed that a distant but firm direction was what the timid woman needed to succeed at SPRQ Point.

Maybe I was wrong.

“Hang on there tiger…” She caught Zoey’s hands as they brushed at her chest. Slowly, she eased them back into a sitting position. “Now clearly, you’re ready to go. And I definitely am. But just one more thing?”

“What?” Zoey asked, clearly starting to get a little miffed at the interruptions.

Thoughts of continuing to deny Zoey her pleasure and watching her get frustrated crossed Joan’s mind. But she wasn’t in the mood for patience.

“Do you want to use a safe word?” Joan asked her, “I have a pretty open mind but if you don’t want to do something I ask for, you can use it too.”

Zoey considered for a moment. “How about…Rolling Stones?”

“That’s two words…” Joan pointed out.

Zoey fingered the zipper at the back of Joan’s dress. “Is that a problem?” She teased the zipper down slightly.

“Nope.”

“Good.” Zoey gave Joan a look. “Now can we please keep going?”

Joan scoffed. “Where was this side of you at work?”

Zoey stiffened slightly, her fingers briefly curling away from Joan. “Do you mind if we…?”

“Right. Oops! No work talk.” Joan bit her tongue to keep herself from asking more questions about Zoey’s behavior. Despite her libido, she couldn’t contain her curiosity. “Don’t let me stop you. Carry on.”

Zoey reached for Joan’s leg, running her hand up the long slit in the dress. Her lips found Joan’s throat, sending little pulses of pleasure all through her. Before she quite knew what was happening, Joan found the dress slipping from her shoulders.

She smirked at the cute little flush on Zoey’s face as her skin was revealed.

“You like what you see?”

Zoey nodded, her mouth apparently having stopped working at the sight of her boss in matching lace underwear. Joan felt a flare of satisfaction that even with her years on Zoey, she could render her speechless just by showing off her body. Guess all those Pilates classes and dawn swims in the Bay had paid off.

She arched her back, noting with pride how the coder visibly swallowed.

Joan was about to start teasing Zoey for her inaction when the younger woman suddenly surged forward. She practically tackled Joan back onto the bed, hands already cupping her breasts. Joan gasped as eager fingers brushed her nipples through the fabric.

Fumbling around her hips, Joan managed to wrestle the dress the rest of the way off, tossing it aside. Zoey straddled her, their lips connecting again.

This time, Joan moaned into the kiss as Zoey’s hips made contact with her very sensitive lower half. She could already feel her own wetness pooling between her thighs.

Impatience gripped her as Zoey continued to fondle her chest. Now was not the time for foreplay…she just needed a release.

Growling, Joan broke the kiss and caught Zoey’s hands, dragging them away from trying to wrestle her bra off.

“No time for that.” Joan shifted, pulling Zoey’s hands further down her body.

Zoey’s eyes widened. “W…wow. Already?”

Joan rolled her eyes. “I’ve been horny for a week.” She forced Zoey’s hand down. “Safe words are still an option. But please just fuck me.”

She smirked as the coder flushed at her language. “Yes, ma’am.” Zoey’s fingers tugged at her panties, gently sliding them off her thighs. “Anything in particular you want?”

“Literally anything will get me off right now…” Joan growled, already squirming. Her libido was piqued and she didn’t want to talk anymore.

Zoey faltered, seeming paralyzed. For a moment, Joan feared she’d finally pushed Zoey too far and that the woman was going to back out and insist they never spoke of this again.

She was too turned on for that outcome.

Joan wrapped her legs around Zoey’s waist and pulled her close. “Please Zoey? I’m dying here.” She hated how desperate she sounded. But until she got what she wanted, she didn’t care. Joan let her legs fall open.

Zoey stared for awhile, so long that Joan almost popped her head up to check on her. But just as she did, a tentative finger entered her.

Joan gasped, body already taut. “Jeez, give a woman a warning!”

“Sorry!”

Joan squeezed her knees shut, trapping Zoey’s hand. “Stop apologizing.” Her hips were already grinding, desperate for any kind of friction.

Zoey obliged, adding a second finger as her thrusts became more confident.

It was glorious. It was just what she’d craved. But she still wasn’t there. Joan huffed in annoyance, hands flailing as she tried to figure out just what was missing to push her over the edge. She brushed at her own breasts, whimpering as the edge dulled.

Zoey leaned down, breath hot on her cheek. “Joan? What do you need?” She asked, fingers never slowing.

“nggh! More!” Joan panted. She dug her nails into Zoey’s shoulder. God, she needed it to hurt…!

For a moment, Zoey’s eyes slid to the side, her gaze unfocusing like she was seeing something in her own head. But just as Joan thought about reaching out to her, Zoey snapped out of it and redoubled her efforts.

Now it hurt.

Joan arched her back, relishing the pain. A long, low moan built in her throat.

Encouraged by her sounds, Zoey nipped her neck.

The unexpected action had Joan’s legs twitching. “More!” She gasped, voice failing.

Zoey obliged, shifting her hand slightly so her mouth could continue its work. She left tiny, prickling bites all across Joan’s chest and shoulders, tongue tracing gently after them.

Joan was rapidly nearing the release she craved, clenching down on Zoey’s fingers and fisting her hand in Zoey’s hair.

Just a little further… The edge was so close again…she could taste it!

Zoey’s lips found her bra and she bit down on Joan’s erect nipple through the fabric.

Joan let out a scream that vaguely sounded like Zoey’s name as she finally hit that spot.

The long-awaited orgasm tore through her with a vengeance: making every muscle in her body ripple and her breath catch. Her heart thudded loudly in her ears and the only coherent thought she had was Zoey, Zoey, Zoey!

The pleasure built, flooding her stomach and chest, making her melt into the bed.

She came down slowly, still panting, head slowly catching up to her body. Zoey was still gently thrusting, guiding her back down off her high.

Joan collapsed back on her pillow, mildly surprised at the dampness beneath her head. Her muscles were trembling like she'd just run a marathon. God, when was the last time sex had been such a satisfying workout?

A soft moan escaped her as Zoey slowly pulled her fingers free. Zoey made a soft sound as well, sounding vaguely like a word Joan couldn’t make out.

As her heart finally slowed, Joan raised herself up on her arms. Rather than exhaust her, her orgasm had pumped her full of the kind of energy she hadn’t felt in almost a decade: the urge for more sexual exploration and the possibility of another such high.

To her surprise, Zoey was standing up, one shoe already on and clearly looking for the other.

“You don’t have to go yet…” Joan called, her voice still hoarse.

Zoey froze, shoulders tensing. “Wh…really?”

Joan crawled up to her, already tugging at Zoey’s zipper. She smirked playfully. “You get a turn too…”

Zoey inhaled as the black dress slid from her body. “Are…are you sure?” She didn’t look reluctant; it was more like surprise.

Joan frowned. Perhaps she hadn’t made it clear enough that she wanted Zoey to get something out of whatever this was too? “We’re already violating HR, Zoey…” She pulled the coder down. “you may as well get to reap some of the reward as well.”

Zoey still seemed uncertain, fidgeting her hands in her lap. Joan leaned back slightly. “We don't have to of course, I’m perfectly content to just receive and let you go on your way…”

But Zoey looked up and Joan’s teasing comment died in her throat.

The coder nodded, face set like she’d finally decided something. “Okay.” She lay back and spread her legs.

Joan almost laughed. Not out of callousness. More from the idea that such a teasing statement had had such an instant effect on Zoey.

It was…incredibly hot.

She crawled over Zoey’s prone body, fingers tracing exposed skin. She noted what spots Zoey reacted to and which ones she didn’t. She played with the coder’s bra briefly, hands remembering the feel of breasts and the satisfaction of feeling a nipple pebble instantly against her touch. But her own bra was still on and Zoey was squirming so she decided to abandon that journey.

She trailed her fingers down Zoey’s chest and stomach, noting just how young and lithe she was. Zoey still had her youth and Joan couldn’t help but envy her for it.

Joan hooked her fingers through Zoey’s panties as she went, pulling them off without fanfare. They felt damp in her hand. She smirked. “Someone’s already a little excited.” She purred, twirling the panties around her finger before letting them fall.

Zoey blushed, the color traveling all over her exposed skin. Joan felt her eyes widen.

Damn.

She’d really been missing out on just how cute Zoey Clarke could be.

Joan made a path down Zoey’s body, lazily tracing her thigh. Her fingers and wrist complained as she made a brief pass at the younger woman’s clit. She frowned as Zoey twitched, flexing her over-worked fingers.

“Why’d you stop?” Zoey asked, knees coming together slightly as she looked up. The younger woman looked pained, and more than a little put-out.

Joan considered the impatient coder, a small part of her enjoying that she could make her squirm. Her fingers may be out of commission at the moment. But that wasn’t going to stop her.

“Mouth okay?” Joan asked, as casually as if she were asking Zoey about having pickles on a sandwich.

Zoey made a choking sound. Joan paused, hand resting comfortably on Zoey’s thigh, waiting to hear their safe words.

“Y…yes…” Zoey breathed. “Please.” She rubbed her knees together briefly before opening up to Joan.

Joan was astounded at the level of trust Zoey had for her. But she wasn’t complaining. She knelt between Zoey’s legs, pulling the shorter woman’s knees over her shoulders. Licking her lips, she eased herself into Zoey.

She hadn’t ate a girl out in decades. But if Zoey’s sounds were anything to go by, Joan knew she still had her college silver tongue.

It helped that Zoey was clearly already very turned on; a fact Joan’s tongue very much relished. She tasted musky and slippery in the best way. Biting back a smile, Joan let her tongue explore, her hands supporting Zoey’s rear as her hips arched.

When Zoey let out a keening wail, Joan knew she was close. She nipped the inside of Zoey’s thigh and dove back in. Zoey responded immediately, knees clenching against Joan's head.

She couldn’t help slipping a single finger inside and curling it back towards her. Her tongue swirled around the coder’s clit.

The younger woman’s legs jerked and before Joan quite knew what was happening, she was falling apart around her. Zoey’s orgasm was short and almost violent, her body twisting this way and that as she grunted through the release. It was over just as suddenly as it began, Zoey falling limp.

A little startled, Joan lapped at Zoey’s core a few more times, making certain that she was done. Then she gently withdrew her finger and sat up, wiping her mouth.

She flinched.

Zoey was crying. It was barely noticeable, but her cheeks were wet and her panting breaths seemed a little too watery for post-orgasm.

“Zoey?” Joan stroked her shoulder, trying to bring the younger woman back to her from her high. “Zoey, did I hurt you?”

“N…no…No.” Zoey tried to smile at her but it looked pained. “You…wasn’t you…” But she still rolled away and stood in one smooth motion, refusing to look at Joan. Still nude, she stumbled towards the bathroom and closed herself away.

Joan sat back on the bed, licking the last traces of Zoey from her mouth. While she knew she didn't need to care, her chest twisted at the thought that she’d accidentally done something to hurt the younger woman.

What was that about?

But before she could come up with any theories, Zoey emerged. Joan sat up straight, sudden apprehension flooding through her.

“Zoey…I…”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Joan.” Zoey assured her, her smile seeming more genuine now. “I just…that was more than I expected.”

“But you’re okay?” Joan clarified, leaning forward. Her concern for the coder was a surprise. But she really did care to know if she was actually okay or just faking.

Zoey shifted, looking nervous. “yeah…”

“Zoey…?” Joan couldn’t help but feel a little guilty. It was just supposed to be sex; she hadn’t meant to push Zoey that far.

“Would you mind if we…cuddled?” Zoey asked, glancing up at Joan with a faint pinkish tinge to her cheeks. “Just for a little while? Then I’ll get out of your hair…”

Joan briefly considered using their safe words. Charlie had never been big on cuddling and she herself wasn’t really a fan. She never knew where to put her arms and had never been able to get comfortable with any of her previous partners. Besides, cuddling post-sex felt a little…too intimate. That was the kind of thing sappy teenagers did.

But after what Zoey had done for her, and after the unexpected roller-coaster she’d put the coder through, why not?

She laid back and beckoned. Zoey’s face lit up. She crawled up beside her and laid her head on Joan’s shoulder. Her face was still damp.

Joan found a semi-comfortable position for her arm around Zoey’s back and held her close. The younger woman sighed into the embrace, arms wrapped around Joan’s waist. It was the closest they’d ever been.

While Zoey closed her eyes and rocked slightly, Joan found herself unable to think about sleep. She stared at the younger woman in her arms.

Zoey was so warm…

To Joan’s surprise, the next day at work was like any other. Well, minus the slight limp in her walk and bites across her chest. And sure, Zoey’s smile was a little brighter than usual but otherwise, they remained exactly as they had been: friendly but no further.

Zoey didn’t even shoot her secret looks across the office, instead remaining focused on her team and their project.

Joan was impressed. She hadn’t realized that the younger woman was so good at compartmentalizing. Definitely a point in her favor.

She imagined that if she’d done the same with any of the guys at the office, they’d be stuck to her side like glue as often as possible, flexing their testosterone. Or worse, slowly falling for her.

But Zoey clearly wasn’t. She still popped in on Joan a few times a day but always for work-related concerns. Her smile never showed anything more than her usual cheery demeanor and platonic fondness.

Joan sat back in her chair as she watched Zoey pack up to leave for the day. The coder was chatting with her friend Max and actually smiling.

She shifted, feeling the small, delicate hickeys from last night protest against her high-collared blouse. Zoey had left the previous night without fanfare; eventually pulling away from their embrace and dressing in front of the mirror as Joan called her a car.

They hadn’t even kissed good night; settling for a simple wave as Zoey descended to the waiting vehicle.

Joan smiled.

It was uncomplicated. Simple. Just sex and a body next to hers. Clearly, Zoey wasn’t going to let this get complicated. If they continued, that is. They hadn’t discussed anything more.

As she watched, Zoey left Max at the elevator, turning back for something. But instead of heading for her desk, she made for Joan’s office.

Joan fumbled to look busy, like she hadn’t just been watching Zoey leave.

“Yes?” She inquired as Zoey stepped into her office. She tapped aimlessly at her tablet screen.

“I just wanted to confirm our engineering-hardware briefing tomorrow?” Zoey was still all business, plugging something into her watch. “Is 11:15 good?”

Joan nodded, still pretending to work. “Works for me.”

Zoey nodded. “Great! I’ll let the team know.” She fidgeted, pulling the strap of her bag closer. “Oh and…one more thing?”

Joan glanced up. “Hmm?”

Zoey was watching her clock, patiently waiting for it to jump from 5:00 to 5:01.

She turned back to Joan. “Last night was really fun. Would you like to do it again sometime?” She said all this in a rush, like she’d been holding it in all day.

Joan perked up, already nodding. “Yes. Tomorrow?”

Zoey’s whole face lit up in a brilliant smile. “My place? I know it’s a bit far for you but you could…stay the night? If it’s easier?” She shook her head. “No pressure.”

Joan wasn’t super thrilled at the idea of spending a night in whatever downtown slum Zoey probably rented. But the woman had been remarkably professional and accommodating about their hookup. And she much preferred Zoey’s warmth to a vibrator so…

Joan shrugged. “Sure. Why not?”

#yeah #i got to the smut early this time #why not?#fic #zoey x joan

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