#it’s been thirty minutes and i’m still uneasy

[todorosie]

idk what I dreamed about in that nap but it involved horrors beyond my comprehension

[morbidmorbid]

Daryl finally reaching the point of the relationship where he can just surrender to the one he loves. Him, on his knees, face buried in your cunt just because he understands now just how much he loves you and can bare himself to you completely.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ADD TO THIS!!! THAT PERSON HAS SINGLE HANDEDLY LEFT ME FERAL OMG!!!! i need that man, I think we ALL need that man 💳💥💳💥

i got uuuuu and sorryyy i’m so late to this i’m a slow writer plus life but here u go !! um this wasn’t supposed to be.. all of this but i can’t help myself. explodes.

18+

⁀➷

it was challenging to get daryl to sleep sometimes.

eyes peel open, gradual, slow. sleep doesn’t weigh heavy on your lids, hadn’t deemed the chance to for prolonged rest was difficult to come by. still, finding idleness was an almost unfamiliar casual occurring and while slow to get comfortable with, it wasn’t completely unwanted. so when your muscles ache and the death in your face suffocates you, you take the chance of a bed and a falsified home even if it comes to be fleeting.

daryl sits perched on the windowsill, cigarette alight.

his dislike for new or change wasn’t the case now, perhaps it was that constant uneasiness that came with the ignorance of another world. daryl, in this state of the world, didn’t kneel to forged comfort—he’d told you that not with his words but with the emptiness in alexandria where his presence should be. he’s recruiting with aaron, he’s on a run, he’s not here. you understand his reservation and while you often touched convictions with him, this was a bit different, this one felt close enough to right.

you don’t bother maneuvering much, only turning a curious head over in his direction. the tidied sheets beneath you ruffle in contact.

“so that’s why i couldn’t sleep.” you say and it’s light, a quip that gently prods. it’s a joke at him forgoing the spot in bed beside you for hard wood beneath him and smoke in his lungs.

daryl takes a drag and pinches it between fingers. inhale, eyes you, exhale, turns away. “right, sorry.” he apologizes for it in his seriousness, watches your eyebrows scrunch in hilarious disbelief and tips in: “looked pretty damn sleep to me, though.”

he hadn’t bothered to crack a window amidst his smoke and it infiltrates the air. it fills your lungs and keeps you from biting back at him that, yeah, you might’ve been somewhere drowned in a dream—whatever those conjured up to be in this time—and it’s an odd thing. to sleep, to fall in deep enough to become unaware of the real around you, and you stick daryl on that development. perhaps things wouldn’t be that simple or easy, there wouldn’t be the opportunity, the comfortability in letting go for a breath.

if not for him perched right where he sits against the glass and looming around you in your vulnerability, likely ignorant to the umbrella of defense he creates.

the sun is long gone and doesn’t burn against the glass like before you’d dozed, only now the enveloping darkness.

“when did you get back?” you ask. his crossbow leans dirty against the wall near the threshold, arrows bloodied. daryl hasn’t shaken the vest or his shoes, nor the dirt on his hands and wedged beneath his fingernails. you reckon thirty minutes, though daryl surprises you.

another drag. “sun was still shinin’ over ya.” he says. it’s been a long while, then. had he eaten? or had he’d smoked his few stale cigarettes and chewed on his thoughts in the stretch of time and that itself is an upsetting possibility.

you purse your lips and your locked fingers dance against eachother, thoughtful. while he seems as he always is, he isn’t. there’s a reason behind everything, the good and the bad, and this one fell between both. “can you come over here? i’m cold.” daryl was a cautious man with little trust and that was good in this world, but right here his hesitancy to pursue not only this false town but you as well was not as pretty as good reasons go.

but that was selfish thinking and unfair to daryl’s morals.

he watches you and years prior he’d been unreadable, but you’re accustomed and he looks like someone who doesn’t believe your words. “it’s sweatin’ balls in here.” he unnecessarily shoots back. daryl, always running behind with your jokes, or maybe he understands but shies away from what you’re asking. daryl was always someone who’d have to work back into accustoms if detached for a while, always slow to reciprocate—even though he so strongly did—lest you’re persistent.

“well, i’m shivering.” you’re saying as you make to rub two hands together to search for warmth. warmth you didn’t need for it already filled you, but a tactic is a tactic.

daryl scoffs a laugh that’s too quiet to catch, but it’s seen. he stubs out his cigarette then, marks the wood in an ugly manner. when he makes the small walk towards the bed, towards you, you’re meeting him halfway as you walk on knees to the edge.

he stops when you speak up. “you’re not getting in bed with all that shit on, are you?”

“was.” he confirms and shrugs and it’s humorous to see how serious he is, how he doesn’t grasp onto the issue.

“take it off, it seems uncomfortable.”

“i ain’t uncomfortable.”

“daryl.”

daryl could be good with orders—could be, a meticulous sort of arrangement—when he agreed with them. this was a mixed case whereas he seemed pulled between the two; the look in his eyes and the firm stance before you screaming i’m fine, i’m staying put. then the other end of the stick with what he eventually complied with in the form of slouched shoulders, guard down, capable of finding that same comfortability in your ways that strived for his growth that he does in his own ways.

still, he grumbles. “ya killin’ me.” and then his jacket goes, his vest, his worn stitched gloves.

you know that daryl prefers to be prepared no matter the situation, doesn’t like to be bared to the world for not even a breath and his heedfulness is commendable. though right here in the warm box that isn’t your inauthentic bedroom but your presence, you recognize his needs are a broad category and this is one of the many.

daryl needs his own relief to come back to despite the state of the world—everyone else has their own, whether in another or in themselves or in between, and daryl deserved just as much.

when he goes to indulge you, two hands coming down against the mattress, you dodge. “don’t forget your shoes, dar.” and he’s all eye contact before finally crouching down. “no shoes in bed, it’s barbaric.”

“guessin’ i oughta get my underwear off, right?” he smiles a small one, sarcastic. “beat ya to the punch.”

you shrug for the joke and he scoffs at it. he bends at the knees nevertheless, lightly hitting the floor and fingers reaching to shove themselves in the heel of his shoe. one goes and joins the pile, but before he can twin the other foot, you’re bringing a hand to his hair. he’s a bit sweaty there, strands darkened in consequence and instead of grimacing, your chest swells with pride, gratitude; daryl’s a fighter and it shows even in the smallest things.

“thank you, by the way. really.” you say when you notice he’s halted his movements. he doesn’t budge even when you move from strand to strand, fixing him, watching his forehead come into view. his brows and shoulders remain lax which is good, encourages you. had it been before he would’ve been a quick hand on your forearm with alarm, unfamiliar in the intimacy, hesitant.

he doesn’t look up yet. “thankin’ me for?” and against your palm he leans.

“i don’t know, everything—for fighting.” you elaborate and it’s then that he’s lifting his head, squinted eyes sharp.

daryl was always shy eyes when commended. he holds your gaze in increments now and you take the moment to let your hands travel. they’re slow and deliberate where they land along the expanse of his jaw and against the hairs on his face. daryl moves with you in whichever direction you think to turn him, and while it’s cute and certainly heavy intimate development on his part, you don’t call him out on it for he embarrasses easily and having him shy away now was not a good call.

“ain’t just me.” he finally says and since he doesn’t like spotlight, “it’s you, michonne, rick—“

“i know.” you cut in. daryl reads into your simple response almost immediately if the expression he holds is telling; a bit taken aback, slightly flustered, understanding. there’s something in your chest that screams pride when daryl comes to realize when you’re making things about him, when you’re specifically singling him out, when you’re picking out all of his goods and positives and displaying them before himself.

daryl preens under your touch. the touch of yours that continues to travel, dancing in his hair, brushing against the skin of his face, running knuckles over cheekbones and forehead wrinkles. every crevice, every bump different. it’s distracting for daryl, you learned prior, lures his mind to a standstill, tugs the words back down his throat. he’s typically left with little to say to you when you’re on him like this, instead speaks with his eyes of a solace he finds between the both of you.

“your hands.” he eventually comments.

“my hands?” although now under scrutiny, they don’t pause their exploration.

“warm. said you were freezin’.”

your lips purse then at his delayed reckoning, laughter at the tip of your tongue. it slips despite your efforts, low and loose, makes daryl squint in situational ignorance. at the prison, daryl had once complimented your laugh under and against the metal of the cell beds, had thrown a ‘nevermind’ in quickly after you’d cooed at him for it.

“well, of course they’re warm now.” you bring them to his neck now, tip of your thumbs caressing his ears. “still cold all over, though.”

and instead of questioning you further, instead of coming up to engulf you in a hug, daryl brings his face into your abdomen. it’s not a punch of air that you lose, but your ability to form coherent thoughts. it’s him not exactly nuzzling, but breathing steadily into the cloth of your shirt, soft inhale, soft exhale. this means something because it always means something.

daryl hides the sudden salacious fervor on his face in the shield that your body creates. it’s obvious, so obvious, because he’s strong and unmoving where you attempt to lift his head.

while it is sudden, the dots seem to connect—daryl, with his lack of space to ever position himself to submit, does so openly right now because there is an opening for it. while he so genuinely kneeled for his shoes, you picked up on the way his pupils dilated when he did find your eyes—ever so brief during those three second variables. it was then that you knew.

“everything okay?” you ask lightly. everything is okay, daryl is so evidently okay which is why he pursues this. you ask anyway, though. daryl says he likes verbal confirmation and reassurance from you and he’d be a hypocrite to not like for you to reciprocate.

“mhm.” it’s muffled against your body which begins to gradually curl around him, between your legs which have swamped him in. “just ain’t comfortable down here.”

“really? you aching already?” you retort with a low laugh.

daryl doesn’t say anything else, nor does he make to stand.

“dick’s hard.” is what he comes up with and it’s so sudden and not at all vague.

you’ve thought it to be the case, so it doesn’t surprise you much. it was apparent the moment he hide himself in what you’d call shame. shame that looked to only follow him in the structure of built up carnal strain that’d been canned inside of him. daryl behaved like he didn’t have a clue that he had it or how to exactly deal with it. when the relationship had sprouted into a much more personal manner, it was always you who’d ‘handle’ daryl even when he struggled finding it in himself to.

he’s bringing hands up and they’re situating themselves on your waist. his hold isn’t suffocating, but it’s tight, fidgeting where he tries to keep his energy levels even.

“if you want something, daryl..” you begin slowly, anticipating where this will take you both. where your hands still sit in daryl’s hair, you pull again and he finally gives way and holy shit.

“ask ya for it.” he finishes, and before you can ponder too long why he already looks so fucking out of it, he’s already beating you to it. “think i busted.” he grunts around the words, fingers twitching against you and he forgoes his hold to wipe the back of his hand against his lips. it looks to be a habit that has budded from his nerves which he strives to conceal.

“did you?..”

daryl curls his lips inwards, another habit, adjusts his knees on the floor. “well, it ain’t piss.“

“oh. you wanna clean up and come up here? we can just—“ daryl was weird with embarrassment, and while it was fun to poke and prod, he’d probably string himself dry thinking back on this, so you try to move it along—not mention it for a moment longer.

“nah.” i’ll stay here is what he says with his actions, bringing his face back to your abdomen, kisses through the shirt. despite his own interference daryl is still there; he shows that he still feels the sensual crave all within himself with the way he simply picks back up regardless of the mess in his pants.

admittedly, it brings a slight tremble down into the pit of your stomach.

you’re whispering out a light okay as he proceeds, hands at your waist shifting and bringing your shirt upwards, tidbits of flesh now exposed. it seems purposeful because he’s then all dry lips and scratchy facial hair against your skin, drinking you in, dirty hands squeezing where they can.

you’re calling out his name to which he responds to with a stronger aggression in action; oddly firm presses of his lips evolving into these tiny nips of teeth, pushing against you enough to send you back onto your palms.

rare were the moments that daryl’s usually subdued needs make such a sudden head. when he’s functioning one moment, high off plenty cigarettes in his normal, and the next he’s chasing you lewdly like he’s just always been without fornication—and he has.

daryl advances south, hands still at your waist, breath fanning over your pants. they’re of comfort with no zipper or buttons to act as a task to undo, so daryl gets to you easily. his hands shake a little as he hooks fingers in the waistband of your pants, not all nervousness but moreso an eagerness that it seems he struggles keeping at bay.

though despite this, he handles you with a certain gentleness and allows himself this moment of vulnerability, of exploration in a way that leaves you both bare in every sense.

your bottoms pull down and you help to kick them off and away.

“gentle.” you say when he stuffs a sweaty face directly into you, hands cupping your legs from beneath, spreading them enough to fit himself comfortably between. “i’m not as flexible as i used to be.”

“can’t tell.” he shoots back in his playfulness that is typically delivered dryly.

he shifts on his knees again, but doesn’t seem entirely too bothered, instead doesn’t spend another second without a tongue pressed wetly against you through the fabric of your garment. he laps at the cloth, grunts incoherencies, presses thumbs into your under thigh, tries to hide the not so subtle clenching in his abdomen. he’s hard again, straining and obvious, at the mercy of his body’s natural instinct to relieve the pressure by humping, rutting, fucking up into anything, searching for something.

“daryl, daryl.” you hiss when he tries to get his mouth on you whole down there, not stalling for anything. “shit, you—let’s take it slow.”

and you know in his current state it’s absurd to ask, he’s already gone.

but still, he hears you because he’s reluctantly pulling away, obedient.

“alright, now take them off, please.” you order, bringing a hand to his hair again. it creates a sort of stability for yourself, whilst for daryl it only tips him more towards the edge.

and since daryl runs on orders, he’s quick to move again with hands sliding you out of the underwear and down your legs. you assist with kicking them off and away, and daryl doesn’t give you a breath in between because he’s a wet tongue on you in an instant.

it’s like something shifts in him—like something breaks, gives way to a heavily chased after relief—seeing the way his shoulders slack. you gasp, feeling the pleasure ripple up your spine, sit hotly in your gut.

“look at you, oh my god.” you begin to taunt and it’s s bit broken off, but still holds its weight. “you look so right down there.”

daryl gives a groan in return, fingers squeezing in protest, but you know he believes it, too.

your chest fills with a breath when he pops off, and it’s beautiful how concentrated he seems with the task. for once, his cheeks tint an airbrush of pink, featherlight and detailing to you just how aroused he is.

to use emphasis, in his still state, you use the opportunity to reel him back in at the hair. it elicits something loud and ruined out of him—a moan, a whine almost. he breathes through his nose when he’s tongue and teeth and cheeks all over you again, and it makes your back arch. the sounds he produces alongside the wetness that you are has you bringing ankles to his backside, locking him in and daryl’s moans are muffled and slightly garbled in reaction.

“you’re gonna—“ cracked. “you’re so good for me, you’re gonna make me cum.”

at that, he pursues you heavier now. like he’s eager to taste you, like he wouldn’t miss it for the world, daryl brings a hand up to rub what he can’t get. it’s wet and nasty and lewdly noisy, and your moans alike. with him using two times the pleasure, it sends you over just as fast.

your eyes squeeze tight as your body racks with the aftershocks, and daryl is ragged breaths somewhere in the void and you’re not sure if it’s him coming as well or the hand deep in his strands has him that strung out.

the wound up muscles in your body release as does your hold on him, and you’re falling to your back against the mattress.

it’s a while before your eyes are peeling open again, head lulled a bit. daryl stands to his feet again at the foot of the bed, cracked bones and all.

“hey.” he starts quietly, haphazardly wipes his mouth. he hovers over you laid out on the bed, arms encasing your head and body heat transferring. “we alrigh’?” his concern etches outside of his tone and into his hot hand that now covers your cheek and ear. his thumb runs over your moist cheekbones and his eyes stick to yours like syrup.

you nod. “yeah.” you assure and watch his expression ease up. “i’m definitely alright. are you?”

he mimics your nod. “mhm.”

“don’t.” you say when he attempts to embrace you entirely. “shower. both of us.” and when he doesn’t respond—“shower. you came twice in your pants.”

daryl shoves his face in the crook of your neck then, ears red.

when the water eventually does come down on you both, it’s shameless in its lack of purity. daryl, despite the night, used a handjob from you underneath the stream before he’d grown shaky in the shoulders and grumpy in the tone, apprehensive in his age. (“ain’t built for another, you’re killin’ me.”)

and he would know himself best because he’s droopy eyes and clean hair against the pillows afterwards, sleep weighing him down. he’s still like he doesn’t feel your gaze, but squints open an eye when you speak.

“i lied about being cold. wanted you in bed.” you smile to contain laughter.

daryl scoffs. “mhm, well .. shit worked.”

[ythankucaptainmccoy]

The Cowgirl and The Aviator Ch9

Cranking these chapters and y'all are in for a treat next chapter ;). @smoothdogsgirl WARNINGS: Verbal abuse, Fighting and mentions of birth.

The barn brought back all of the good memories when you used to compete. All the late nights under the bright arena lights galloping around barrels and you teared up. “You alright?”, Jake questioned. “Yeah just remembering what it used to be like when I competed in barrels back home”, you replied. Your smile made Jake’s grin turn into a full blown smile. Damn you loved the way this man smiled at you. “You can pick any of the horses in here”, Colton informed you. You looked back at Jake as he nodded for you to go ahead. 

You walked down the row of stalls until you came to a stall that held a beautiful Kiger mustang. “What about this one?”, you asked. “That’s our newest edition. Only been ridden for thirty days. He’s still green but you're more than welcome to ride 'em’. We call him Rebel “, Colton explained. Jake seemed uneasy as he picked his horse a beautiful sorrel with white socks and blaze. You moved slowly and kept your voice calm as you haltered him. 

You took your time with him as you groomed him then saddled him. You could tell by his facial expression he was nervous and you took a deep breath and exhaled letting your body relax. Jake and the others headed out of the barn as you made your way to where they were waiting on horseback. You patted Rebel’s neck as you grabbed mane and hauled yourself up and into the saddle. You breathed in deep and exhaled slowly again to relax your body which in turn seemed to relax Rebel.

You noticed Annabelle was trotting in a circle waiting on the three of you. Colton held Georgia in front of him on his horse and you swear it was the cutest thing ever. Jake kept watching you making sure the horse you were on wasn’t going to freak out. You all headed out and before too long you were in the middle of nothing but grassland. “Let's go”, Annabelle said. She kicked her horse and took off at a canter. Jake looked back at you as Colton made his horse go as well. “We don’t have to if you don’t feel comfortable”, Jake said.

“I have ridden lots of horses Jake and trained all kinds of horses even mustangs I know what I’m doing”, you tell him. You asked your horse to go and boy did he as he lunged forward at a full gallop. It startled you at first but then you gave him some rein and let him go. Jake had to kick his horse to go following behind you. It didn’t take you long to catch up to the others as you slowed your horse, but he didn’t want to slow. You pulled on the reins and sat against him as he decided to throw a small buck.

“Oh no ya’ don’t”, you told him as he tried to keep going. That’s when he went into full bucking mode. “Yeah ride ‘em!”, Colton yelled. Jake was gripped with fear as he watched you ride the bucks. It took a few minutes, but eventually he decided to stop. “Well Jake I gotta say your girl knows how to ride”, Colton said. “I can’t believe you let her get on that horse”, Jake huffed. “She did perfectly fine. I’m sure she wouldn’t have gotten on if she couldn’t handle it”, Colton told him. 

You trotted up and stopped right in front of Jake’s horse. “That was the most fun I have had in such a long time”, you laughed. Jake’s mouth fell open slightly as you said something about going again then he smiled. “Come with me (Y/N) I know where we’re going”, Annabelle told you. You followed after her as Colton and Jake rode side by side. “I think you picked a good one Jake, she's a keeper”, Colton said. “Yeah she is”, Jake replied. “I was gonna’ wait to tell ya’ till after the ride, but your father found out you’re back. He has invited himself over tonight for dinner”, Colton informed. “Can’t that fucker just leave us well enough alone”, Jake sighed. “Bad unc Jake”, Georgia stated. “Sorry Georgia”, Jake replied.  “He knows that you brought a woman back with ya’ so you know how this is probably gonna’ go”, Colton explained.

“Well I’ll let (Y/N) know and we will just have to deal tonight”, Jake said confidently. He was anything but confident right now. He knew what was in store at dinner and he was praying that you wouldn’t decide to leave him. He pushed the thought to the back of his head and enjoyed the ride. Between the three of you the cattle were safely moved and on the ride back Annabelle wanted to race. “I’m out, you know your momma doesn’t like me racin’ with Georgia”, Colton said. 

“What about Jake and (Y/N)? We only race to the next gate.”, Annabelle asked. “I’m in”, you responded looking at Jake. “I don’t know it wouldn’t be fair for you two ladies”, Jake boasted. Colton snorted a laugh and shook his head. “There is that cocky pilot attitude”, you say. “I’m not cocky I just know I’m that good”, Jake grinned. “How about a bet”, you said. “What kind of bet?”, Jake questioned, remembering how the two of you met. “Well if you win I’ll take care of your horse when we get back, but if I win you have to take me out line dancing”, you say.

“Deal. Alright Annabelle let’s line up. Your dad can tell us when to go”, Jake said. “Annabelle gets a head start”, Colton said knowing that you two would pass her quickly. Annabelle took off and you kept looking at Jake who smirked that cocky way that you hated to admit that you loved. “On your marks. Get set. Let ‘em go!”, Colton yelled. Both horses launched themselves forward as you made your way to the next gate. You were both neck and neck, but you were still holding the reins on your horse pretty tight as you both passed Annabelle who yelled, “GO (Y/N) BEAT JAKE!”. 

“See ya at the finish line darlin’!”, Jake yelled. You let him believe he had it, but continued to hold your horse back until the last quarter mile. You let the reins go slack and squeezed your legs. Rebel got the message and bolted ahead gaining quickly on Jake. When you passed him Jake had a look of shock as you laughed. You let out a joyous cry as you passed the open gate and slowed Rebel down. Jake wouldn’t admit but when he watched you canter back he was imagining you riding him like that. 

“I believe you owe me a line dance”, you say coming up beside Jake’s horse. You patted Rebel on the neck as you waited for Annabelle and Colton to catch up with Georgia. Once back at the barn you untacked your horse and groomed him. Glancing at Jake every once in a while as he took care of his own horse. “Colton if you want we can take care of everything here in the barn”, Jake announced. Colton got the hint and took the girls inside  as you and Jake put the horses in their respective stalls.

“Jake, do you think Colton and Evelynn would let me enter the rodeo with Rebel?”, you asked. “He is green and doesn’t even know how to run barrels”, Jake replied. “I can train him within our stay period if that’s okay with you”, you say. Jake can tell that it means a lot to you. “I’ll be okay with it as long as Colton and Evelynn are alright with it”, he tells you. You smile and lean up to kiss him long and slow. “You still owe me a line dance”, you laugh. “That I do, but I think you should ask Colton about Rebel first”, he says. With the affirmation you jog to the house where Evelynn and Colton are more than happy to lend Rebel to you, and before you leave with Jake you register for the rodeo.

Jake, true to his word, takes you into Austin to a bar that has line dancing. You both have a few drinks and you're surprised when he shows you he can in fact dance, but at one point they play George Strait’s song “The Chair”. Jake pulls you in close as you both slow dance and mouthing the words as the next song is another George Strait song “Carrying Your Love With Me”. He loves the content smile as you lay your head on his chest. As you both sway to the music Jake in this moment realizes that not once have you ever turned him away.

Even as he cried in the kitchen after losing Banshee and Fluke you were there to pick up the pieces. “(Y/N)”, he whispers. “Yes baby”, you reply, looking into his eyes. “I love you”, he tells you. At that moment you swear you see his heart and soul being poured out in front of you and you can’t help but kiss him slowly ro reply with, “I love you too Jake”. When the next song comes on you decide you want to go home. You get into the truck to head back to the ranch. “Jake can we camp out under the stars tonight?”, you ask. 

“Anything for you darlin’ “, he responds. You both stop at the house to grab blankets and pillows. When you reach the pond Jake starts a fire as you set everything up in the bed of the truck. Under the stars you look at Jake who is looking at you like you’re the most beautiful thing in the world. “You know I was supposed to bring you to dinner tonight. My father was there to meet you”, he told you. “Why didn’t you?”, you inquired. “I promised to take you line dancing and you will always come before my asshole father”, he explained.

You smiled as you kissed him and pulled his shirt over his head. He grunts as you take a nip at his nipple before you go to his belt. That night you both spend time making each other cum with your mouths. Eventually Jake pulls you over him completely naked and covers you both as you both fall asleep. The night passes peacefully and you both startle awake when the truck’s horn blows loud and clear. Jake looks for the source and spots his father as he places you behind him. “What the hell do you want?”, Jake seethes.

“We need to talk”, Jake's father says. Jake looks at you as you nod to assure him you will be okay. His dad walks away as you both get dressed. You watch as Jake goes to talk with his father, but stay put and listen in as best as you can. “Why weren’t you at dinner last night boy?”, his father sneers. “I took my girl into town since I made a promise to take her out”, Jake replied. “Family is always first. I taught you better than to be disrespectful since your sister made dinner”, he said.

“She knew I wasn’t going to be there as I discussed it with her before we left for town. She was fine with us not being there so cut the shit. You are the one that feels disrespected because I put someone before you”, Jake accused. “Don’t think that your slut of a girlfriend won’t leave you like the last one”, his father digs. “She isn’t like the last one”, Jake defended. “Whatever you want to believe, but your sister is going to make dinner again tonight and I expect you to be there”, his father announced. 

Jake’s father tipped his hat at you and got into his truck and drove off. “Jake, are you okay?”, you ask. “Yeah I’ll be fine. I’m sorry if you overheard what he said”, he apologized. “No Jake, Never apologize on your asshole fathers behalf. He doesn’t deserve it”, you reply. Jake smiles at that knowing you're in his corner. “Well let’s get to the house so we can get ready for the day. I want to help Evelynn with dinner since we missed last night”, you told him.

The drive back to the house you could tell Jake was nervous and tense. After your showers and getting ready Jake took you up to the main house so you could help Evelynn. “You know you don’t have to help me”, Evelynn said. “Well I feel like it’s the least I could do”, you replied. “Since you have met my father already I’m sure you have already judged what dinner will be like tonight. The last girl he brought home left crying and a couple days later she packed up and left”, Evelynn says. 

“I wouldn’t leave Jake to fight this battle alone”, you assure. Evelynn smiles at that knowing that what you say is true. “You both are a great match”, she laughs. “Well I felt like whatever happened happened so fast. Hell to some it seemed too fast”, you sigh. “Well I only dated Colton for a year and look where we are now”, Evelynn laughs. It makes you feel better now to know that piece of information. 

The day was spent helping Evelynn to get the dinner together as Jake, Colton and the girls had decided to go riding. When they got back everyone seemed to be bracing for the arrival of Jake and Evelynn’s father. He showed up a few minutes late, but no one said anything about it. You sat beside Jake and once everyone was sitting Colton said grace. The dinner table was quiet other than Georgia asking for help to cut up some of her food. “When are you coming back home to take over the ranch”, Jake’s father says. 

“I’ve already told you not anytime soon”, Jake snaps. You knew this was going to be an intense dinner from the start. “Well at least your sister is finally having a son. I may leave everything to him”, his father states. “My son will not be saddled with that ranch’s name”, Colton speaks up. “So what your going to give him this ranch?”, he sneers. “He can take over this ranch, he can go to college or anything else he wants to do, but I won’t force him to take over anything if he doesn’t want to”, Colton replies. 

“I always knew you married a weak man”, he says to Evelynn. It continues on for a few minutes as Jake is becoming more agitated. “I think the only weak man is you”, you blurt out at Jake’s father. “Excuse me, but I didn’t ask for your opinion”, he snarks. “No you didn’t but you’re gonna’ hear it anyway and I don’t give a damn how you feel about it. From what I can tell you can’t stand the fact that you aren’t in control of anyone anymore and it pisses you off”, you state. Jake is staring at you wide eyed as you square your shoulders.

Jake’s father glares at you as you hold his gaze. “You have some horns on you girl, but you will show me respect”, he states. “I only show respect to people who have earned it. I don’t just give it for free. So far tonight I have seen nothing you have done that would earn my respect”, you respond. Evelynn announces she is going to take the girls upstairs for a bath and leaves. Colton says something about going outside for some air. 

Once outside Jake’s father picks his fight with you again. “I don’t think you’re the type I want dating my son”, he huffs. “Why because I speak my own mind and not afraid of a horrid old man that used to hit his wife”, you spit. The next thing you know Jake’s father throws a punch your way, but it never lands as you hear a grunt then a full on scrap. Jake had tackled his father and was now scrapping with him on the ground. “Jake”, you cry, but Colton grabs you as you try to go help him.

“He needs to do this (Y/N)”, Colton says. You watch as they trade blows, but it is clear that Jake is winning. Within ten minutes it’s over as Jake stands over his father. “Don’t you ever try to put your hands on my woman again. If you ever hurt her I’ll kill you old man. Now leave and don’t ever come back to bother me or this family ranch again”, Jake growls. Jake’s father is heaving as he is trying to catch his breath. Colton lets you go as you run to Jake to check him over, but he only pulls you into his side. 

All three of you stare down the old man as he curses you all as he gets in his truck and leaves. As soon as he is gone you fuss over Jake’s face and his split knuckles. He lets you lead him into the kitchen where he pulls you into his lap as you try to ice the bruises on his face. “I love you”, he whispers. “I love you too, but you didn’t have to do that”, you reply. “It was a long time coming and I should have done it a lot sooner”, he tells you. You kiss him tenderly as you tell him to continue to ice his face while you help clean up the dinner table.

When Evelynn comes back down she asks Jake what had happened as he explains. Evelynn tells him how proud she is and that she was waiting for the day he would finally take his frustration out on their old man. Colton hands Jake a beer and they head outside as you help Evelynn with the dishes. “You know he loves you right”, she tells you. “I know he does, I can see it every day”, you respond. “You’re the first girl he has brought here since college”, she mutters. “What do you mean?”, you ask.

“He brought his ex down here, and she cried when my father came to dinner. Then a week after they went back Jake found out that she was cheating on him with his roommate. He was shattered when he found out because he had bought a ring to ask her to marry him. He hasn’t had a real relationship since then and that was years ago”, Evelynn explained. You looked out to the front porch where Jake was still talking with Colton. “Most people never give him a chance. I know he can be cocky when he is on base, but no one really knows him like we do”, Evelynn says.

You file away that information as you finish up. When you and Jake end up back at the house you're staying in you show him how grateful you are by giving him a massage. “Thank you for protecting me”, you whisper. “I would do it anytime for you darlin’ “, he whispers back. That night you relax by watching a couple of old westerns until you fall asleep. Jake feels liberated after all these years of taking verbal abuse and sometimes physical abuse from his father. He smiles down at you when he recalls Colton telling him you were ready to jump into the scrap to help him.

The week is much the same, but you spend most days training Rebel and within the week he has it down. The rodeo is a week away and you are getting more excited as Jake watches you train. He has to admit he likes watching you ride even with being thrown a couple times. Each time you were thrown he would run into the arena checking you over. You would just laugh and tell him it was part of the process especially with a green horse. The days wear you out, and you are usually asleep by the time Jake slips into bed.

The next week goes by smoothly until Wednesday as Colton comes tearing down the driveway. “Evelynn thinks it’s time to go. Can you take the girls and meet us at the hospital”, he rushes. Jake agrees as the girls get out of the truck and come to stand with you. Evelynn is in the passenger seat cool as a cucumber. “Are you okay?”, you ask. “Yeah this is my third kid I know what to expect now. He is a little early, but it’ll be alright”, she tells you. Colton hops back in the truck and floors it out of there.

“I think he is more worried than she is”, you laugh. “Yeah you should have seen him with Annabelle”, Jake states. You get Georgia into the truck in her car seat and Annabelle gets herself buckled in. Three hours and you're in the hospital waiting room as the girls try to keep themselves entertained. Annabelle decides she wants to go for a walk around the hospital so you all decide to go. Georgia is smiling as she points at the ducks on a small pond by the hospital.

“Uncle Jake, can we go get something to eat?”, Annabelle complains. “Yeah we can walk down the street and get some Mexican food”, Jake says. Annabelle lights up at the prospect and Jake explains that Mexican food is Annabelle’s favorite. The meal is delicious and you help Georgia with her cheese quesadilla. Jake can’t help but watch you anytime you interact with the girls. He knows that you’re good with kids and if he plays his cards right he hopes someday you both can have some kids running around. 

When you all got back to the hospital it was late evening when the nurse came out to inform you that Evelynn and the baby were doing great. A couple hours after that another nurse came to ask if anyone wanted to go see the baby. Annabelle was excited as she pulled on Jake’s hand as you held a sleeping Georgia. “Go meet your nephew I’ll stay here with Georgia”, you whisper. He leaned down and kissed you then headed to go meet his nephew.

When Jake comes back he has tears in his eyes with the goofiest grin on his face. “Are you okay?”, you ask. “Yeah it was just a lot”, he says. “He was so small”, Annabelle says. “You used to be that small when you were born”, Jake says. “How do you know?”, Annabelle questioned. “Because I waited in this same hospital and held you after you were born”, Jake muses. Georgia was still asleep and Jake had said that Evelynn and the baby would be home by Friday. “Do you mind if the girls come back home with us?”, Jake asked. “I don’t mind baby”, you tell him. 

When you reach the house Jake goes to the empty room that you hadn’t been in. There were two twin beds and you could tell this is where the girls would stay when he was here. You carried a still sleeping Georgia while Jake carried a now sleeping Annabelle. They looked so peaceful and Jake turned out the light grabbing your hand and leading you to your room. You both lay there as Jake holds you. “He was so small and I can’t believe I have a nephew. I wish you could have seen him”, Jake sighs.

“I’ll see him soon enough”, you tell him. You both fell asleep, but it didn’t last long as you felt a tug on the back of your shirt. You rolled over and came face to face with Georgia, tears streaming down her face. “Oh what's wrong sweetheart?”, you ask. “Stom”, she hiccupped. About two seconds later the sky lit up and thunder boomed outside as Georgia jumped clinging to you. “Darlin’ what’s wrong”, Jake yawned. “The storm woke Georgia up”, you relayed. “Do you want to sleep in our bed?”, you asked. She nodded as you pulled her up and in between you and Jake.

“It’s alright Georgia you're safe here with Uncle Jake and Aunt (Y/N)”, Jake hummed half asleep. You froze as Georgia curled up between you as Jake’s words sank in. You watched as she snuggled into you and clung to your shirt. Jake smiled and threw his arm around both of you as everyone settled in. Jake and Georgia went to sleep first then you drifted off soon after. The next morning Georgia and Jake were gone and you could hear giggling coming from the kitchen.

When you walked in there was pancake batter all over the counters. Annabelle was giggling as Jake was making pancakes. “Aunt (Y/N)!” Georgia squealed. She ran to you and hugged your leg and you instantly started to tear up. “Darlin’ what’s wrong?”, Jake asked. “I have never been called Aunt anything”, you said. “I thought your brother had kids”, Jake stated. “Yeah but he never let me see them”, you replied. 

Jake stopped what he was doing and came over to pull you into a hug. “Well you have a family here if you want it”, Jake told you. You let the tears fall as you heard those words and next thing you knew Annabelle and Georgia were hugging you too. “Uncle Jake is right, we can be your family. “Thanks now let’s try and clean up this mess”, you sniffled. As Jake finished the pancakes you and Annabelle helped clean up.

[sadnymi]

Compass

[Mattheo riddle × reader]

Summary: mattheo told you not to go to this party but you didn’t listen.

Warnings: angst - sexual assault - hurt comfort- fluff.

Words:3.5k

Regret gnawed at me like a Dementor, sucking the joy out of the throbbing bass that pulsed through the club. "Just a thirty minutes," I muttered under my breath, a hollow promise I already knew I was breaking. Stepping into the dimly lit nightclub, guilt coiled in my stomach like a rogue Niffler.

Lying to Mattheo, even for a small white lie, felt like a betrayal. It wasn't like he was controlling; he'd never been that kind of boyfriend. This was different. This was about safety. This side of the city was a lawless labyrinth, a haven for cutthroat gangsters and creatures that'd make even a Boggart flinch. Dark magic here felt like a child's tea party compared to the real horrors that lurked in the shadows.

Mattheo had been adamantly clear: "There's no way you're going, Y/N. This isn't some harmless bar crawl. This place is rotten to the core."

He wasn't exaggerating. Esteban, a notorious thug with a reputation even lord Dracula wouldn't touch, ran this side of town. Let’s just say Mattheo nearly killed him last year.

Jenna, my oldest friend, was celebrating her birthday. Tradition dictated that we spend it together, Hogwarts alumni or not. But this year, her boyfriend's place was the only option, and his affiliations made Mattheo uneasy. Unfortunately, what he called “work” with Theo and Enzo across the country kept him tied up. Lucky me, right?

The guilt intensified. Mattheo wouldn't have cared about a night in, but Jenna wouldn't budge on the location. "This place has the best Gobstones court in the city," she'd insisted over the Floo network, her voice tinged with annoyance.

"Easy for you to say," I'd grumbled, wishing I could confide in her about the real reason for my hesitation.

So, here I was, a liar and a lousy girlfriend. An hour ago, my phone buzzed with Mattheo's nightly call. Claiming to be already tucked in bed. He'd chuckled, that deep, comforting sound that always calmed my nerves. "Sleep well, love," he'd said. "Can't wait to see you tomorrow."

The memory of his voice made me wince. I was the worst. Reaching for my phone, I considered a quick Floo call, an apology on the tip of my tongue. But the pulsating music and the throng of sweaty bodies pressed in around me, making the prospect of navigating the fireplace network feel overwhelming.

With a resigned sigh, I plunged deeper into the club. The air was thick with the scent of spilled Butterbeer and something considerably stronger. Glancing around, I searched for Jenna's fiery red hair amongst the dancing crowd. Spotting her at a corner booth, relief washed over me, momentarily pushing aside the fear gnawing at my insides.

"Hey! You made it!" Jenna exclaimed, pulling me into a hug.

"Yeah, I did," I said, trying to keep the unease out of my voice. "Happy birthday, Jenna."

"Thank you! I’m so glad you’re here. Come on, let’s get you a drink!"

I nodded, following her to the bar. As Jenna ordered our drinks, I glanced around nervously, half-expecting to see Esteban or one of his goons lurking in the shadows.

"Everything okay?" Jenna asked, handing me a drink.

"Yeah, just... tired, I guess," I lied, taking a sip. "So, how’s your night been?"

"It’s been great! But seriously, are you okay? You seem a bit off."

I sighed, deciding to come clean at least partially. "I just... Mattheo didn’t want me to come here tonight. He’s worried about this part of the city."

Jenna frowned. "I get it. But you’re with us, and we’ll make sure you’re safe. Plus, we’ll only stay for a little while. I promise."

"Thanks, Jenna," I said, feeling slightly reassured but still on edge.

As the night wore on, I tried to relax and enjoy myself. Jenna and our friends were having a great time, and I didn’t want to ruin it for them. But every time the door opened or a shadow moved, my heart raced.

Just as I was beginning to feel like I might get through the night unscathed, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned around, my heart leaping into my throat.

"Well, well, look who decided to show up in my territory," a familiar voice drawled.

I looked up to see Esteban, a smirk plastered on his face. "Esteban," I said, trying to keep my voice steady. "I’m just here for a friend’s birthday. I don’t want any trouble."

"Trouble? Who said anything about trouble?" he replied, leaning in closer. "But you know, your boyfriend might see it differently."

"Stay away from me, Esteban," I said, trying to back away.

"Or what?" he taunted. "Your precious Mattheo isn’t here to protect you."

My phone couldn’t stop ringing, and I was freaking out. I tried to get away from the music as much as I could, but Esteban followed me. I glanced at the screen and saw Mattheo’s name flashing. My hands trembled as I answered.

"Hey," I said, trying to sound normal.

"Where are you?" Mattheo’s voice was sharp, and I could hear the tension in it.

"I... I’m just out with friends," I said, my voice trembling.

"Which friends? And where?" he demanded.

I hesitated, glancing at Esteban, who was watching me with amusement. "At a club," I admitted. "In the city."

"I told you not to go there," Mattheo said, his voice low and dangerous.

"Mattheo, please listen, it’s just—" I tried to explain, but he cut me off.

"You fucking lied to me," he snarled. I heard a car door slam hard on his end, and then the line went dead.

I closed my eyes, trying to calm down, but I couldn’t. I had lied to him, and it hurt so much to know that I had let him down. I turned around, intending to apologize to Jenna and then leave.

"Leaving so soon? But the party’s just getting started," Esteban said, stepping in front of me and blocking my path.

"Get out of my way," I said, my voice trembling with anger and fear.

He grabbed my arm, his grip painfully tight. "See this scar on my face?" he sneered, leaning in so close that I could see the thin white line running down his cheek. "Your boyfriend did this. See this, gorgeous?" His fingers dug into my skin, making me wince.

I tried to pull away, but he held me firmly. "It was because of you. Because I was eye-fucking this night," he said, his voice low and menacing.

My eyes widened in shock. I had no idea. "Esteban, let go of me," I said, trying to free myself.

He tightened his grip, pulling me closer. "And what a great way to take revenge, don’t you think?" he hissed. "By taking you right here, right now."

"Let go of me!" I shouted, panic rising in my chest.

He ignored me, his eyes dark and predatory. "Imagine it," he said, his voice dripping with malice. "I’ll take you, and there’s nothing you can do about it. I will leave nothing for him to pick I’ll make you scream my name, make you beg for mercy."

"Stop it! Let me go!" I cried, struggling against his hold.

He laughed, a cruel, mocking sound. "You’re all alone, sweetheart. And I’m going to enjoy every second of it."

Mattheo appeared out of nowhere, grabbing Esteban by the collar and shoving him against the wall. "I told you before, if you get near her, you're dead, didn’t I ?" Mattheo snarled.

Esteban smirked, though his eyes showed fear.

Mattheo didn’t release him. Instead, he pulled back his fist and hit Esteban so hard that I heard the sickening crack of bone against bone. Blood spattered, and Esteban crumpled, barely conscious.

Jenna’s boyfriend and then Theo and Enzo rushed in, pulling Esteban from Mattheo’s grip. "Not now, Mattheo. That’s enough. We’ll deal with him later," Theo said firmly.

Mattheo’s eyes were wild, but he didn’t stop until Theo’s words sank in. He turned to leave. When he looked at me, his eyes were cold, and he looked away as if he couldn’t even bear to see me.

"I’m sorry, Mattheo, I—" I started to say, but he was already walking out. He gave Enzo a curt nod, silently instructing him to stay with me.

Enzo stepped closer, placing a gentle hand on my arm. "Are you okay?" he asked softly, his eyes scanning my face for any sign of injury.

"It’s all my fault," I whispered, tears welling up.

"No, Y/N. No, it wasn’t your fault. What he did is not your fault," Enzo said firmly.

"I lied to Mattheo. I shouldn’t have done that," I admitted, my voice breaking.

"Yes, you shouldn’t have," Enzo agreed, "but that doesn’t mean you deserved what happened. And believe me, what happened to him tonight is nothing compared to what Mattheo will do to that fucker later."

I started to cry, my body shaking with sobs. "I was only going to stay for thirty minutes. I swear. I called him, and he said he was coming tomorrow."

Enzo sighed. "Yeah, he wanted to surprise you. Yesterday, you were so upset, so he planned to leave early and be with you. But when he got home and you weren’t there, and you didn’t answer your phone... He called Theo and me, and, well, you know the rest."

We stepped outside, and Enzo walked me to Mattheo’s car. Mattheo was talking with Theo, his expression hard. When he noticed me, he opened the car door and got inside without a word.

I side-hugged Enzo, who gave me a reassuring smile. Theo placed a hand on my shoulder, his eyes sympathetic. "Take care," he said quietly.

I got into Mattheo’s car, my heart heavy with guilt and fear. As we drove in silence, I couldn’t help but think about how I had betrayed his trust. I knew it would take a long time to make things right, but I was determined to do whatever it took to earn his forgiveness.

The silence in the car was unbearable. I glanced at Mattheo, his jaw clenched, eyes fixed on the road ahead. The tension between us was palpable, thick enough to cut with a knife. I knew I had to say something, anything to break this horrible silence.

"Mattheo," I began, my voice barely above a whisper. He didn't react, his grip on the steering wheel tightening. "Mattheo, please, say something."

He remained silent, his eyes never leaving the road. I felt a lump forming in my throat, my eyes stinging with unshed tears. "I know I deserve this. I know I deserve for you to be mad at me, but please, Mattheo, I'm begging you, say something."

Still nothing. The car seemed to swallow my words, the only sound the hum of the engine and the occasional passing car. I took a deep breath, trying to steady my voice.

"I'm so sorry, Mattheo. I know I shouldn't have gone. I shouldn't have lied to you. I just... I didn't want to let Jenna down. I thought I could handle it." My voice cracked, and I had to swallow back a sob. "I was wrong. I know that now."

I reached out, my hand trembling as I touched his arm. He flinched slightly but didn't pull away. "Please, Mattheo, just talk to me. Yell at me if you need to, but don't shut me out."

His silence was killing me. Each second that passed felt like an eternity. I could see the conflict in his eyes, the anger and hurt battling within him.

"Please, Mattheo, I know I messed up. I know I let you down. But I love you. I love you so much, and I can't stand this silence. Please, just say something."

His knuckles were white from gripping the steering wheel so tightly. I saw his jaw work, as if he was struggling to keep his emotions in check.

"I don't know what else to say," I whispered, my voice breaking. "I deserve for you to be angry. I deserve for you to hate me. But please, please don't shut me out. I can't bear it."

"Please, Mattheo, I know I messed up. I know I let you down. But I love you. I love you so much, and I can't stand this silence. Please, just say something."

The entire ride was filled with my desperate apologies and his chilling silence. I kept calling his name, hoping for a response, but he remained unyielding. "I’m so sorry," I kept saying. "Please, just talk to me."

The ride wasn’t long, and before I knew it, we arrived at the house. He parked the car and got out swiftly, not sparing me a single glance. My heart pounded as he walked around to my side and opened the door for me, still silent. I followed him inside, my footsteps echoing in the quiet night.

"Mattheo," I said softly as we entered the house. "Please, can we talk?"

He ignored me, his eyes forward, his expression unreadable. I saw the blood on his knuckles from where he had hit Esteban. The sight made my stomach churn with guilt and worry.

I reached out to touch his hand, but he pulled away sharply, not allowing me to make contact. "Mattheo, your hand," I said, my voice quivering. "Let me help you."

He continued to ignore me, and that’s when I broke down completely. The sobs wracked my body, and I sank to the floor, covering my face with my hands. "I’m so sorry," I cried. "I know I messed up. I know I did. But please, Mattheo, don’t shut me out. I need you. I need to make this right."

He stood there for a moment, his back to me, before he finally walked away, leaving me alone in the hallway. The sound of his footsteps faded, and I felt an overwhelming sense of loss.

I knew I had hurt him deeply, and the realization was almost too much to bear. All I wanted was to take back my mistakes and show him how much I regretted my actions.

Alone with my regret, I stumbled towards our room, a hollow shell consumed by despair. The stench of Esteban, cloying and repulsive, still clung to me – a foul reminder of my stupidity. I needed to wash it away, scrub the memory of his touch from my skin.

The hot water cascaded down, scalding but strangely comforting. I lathered soap with desperate fervor, scrubbing my arms, my face, anywhere that Esteban's vile contact had dared to linger. Tears mingled with the suds, a salty testament to my foolishness.

Emerging from the shower, cleansed but still raw, I wrapped myself in one of Mattheo's oversized shirts. Its familiar scent, offered a sliver of solace. Stepping out, I scanned the room, my heart sinking into my stomach. Empty.

Mattheo wasn't there. Panic clawed at my throat as I raced downstairs, the silence of the house amplifying my anxieties. Then, through the open kitchen door, I saw him.

He stood by the counter, a half-empty glass of water in his hand. His face, usually etched with amusement or affection, was now a mask of stoic anger.

Taking a deep breath, I approached him, my voice barely a whisper. "You're… not coming to bed?"

He glanced at me, his steely gaze as sharp as a Gringotts goblin's dagger. "I'll sleep at the guest room," was all he said, his voice flat and emotionless.

The words hit me like a Stunning Spell. "No," I blurted out, tears welling up again. I pushed them back fiercely, frustration warring with despair. "Mattheo, please. I…"

"You… you will do that?" I managed. I wanted to scream, to shout that I wouldn't let him sleep in the guest room, that I needed to feel his warmth beside me, a shield against the storm of guilt raging inside.

But the words wouldn't come. The fear of pushing him further, of losing him completely, choked them back.

"Is that what you want?" I managed, my voice a mere tremor.

He didn't answer, only looked down at me, the anger still simmering in his eyes. I saw a flicker of pain there too, a reflection of the hurt I'd inflicted.

A single, choked sob escaped my lips. Defeated, I nodded, a silent surrender to his unspoken punishment. "If that's what you want," I whispered, the words tasting like ashes in my mouth.

He turned without another word,towards the guest room, leaving me alone in the cold embrace of the kitchen.

I lay in bed, my eyes closed tightly as tears streamed down my face. Sleep was impossible. Every time I tried to drift off, Esteban's smirk and his disgusting words would flash through my mind, making me shudder. I hugged myself, clutching Mattheo’s pillow for comfort, but it did little to soothe the turmoil inside me.

I couldn’t stop seeing Esteban’s face, hearing his voice, and the more I tried to push it away, the more vivid it became. My mind was a battlefield, and I was losing. I shifted restlessly, trying to find some semblance of peace, when something brushed against my hand. It was just a pillow, but in my heightened state, it startled me.

I screamed, bolting upright and scrambling to the end of the bed. In my panic, I knocked over the bottle of water on the nightstand, and it shattered on the floor with a loud crash. My sobs grew louder as I curled up, trembling uncontrollably.

The door burst open, and Mattheo rushed in. "Y/N! What happened?" he asked, his voice filled with worry as he hurried to my side. He knelt beside the bed, his hands gently touching my shoulders. "Hey, look at me," he said softly. "It's okay, I'm here."

I was crying too hard to respond, my breaths coming in short, panicked gasps. Mattheo cupped my face in his hands, his eyes searching mine. "Breathe with me, okay? In and out, slowly."

I tried to follow his lead, focusing on his steady breathing. His presence was a lifeline, grounding me in the moment. Slowly, my breathing began to even out, though my tears still flowed freely.

Pulling back slightly, Mattheo kept his hands on my shoulders, his eyes searching mine. "What happened?" he asked gently. "Did you have a nightmare?"

"I… I thought I saw something," I mumbled, my voice barely a whisper. Shame burned in my throat, acrid and suffocating.

Mattheo scanned the room, his gaze lingering on the shattered glass before returning to me.

"There's nothing here, love," he said softly, his voice a soothing balm. "Except you and me. And I'm not going anywhere."

"I was scared, Mattheo. When Esteban grabbed me, I thought... I thought he was going to... and all I could think about was you. How much I needed you, how much I regretted not listening to you." The tears were falling freely now, but I didn't care.

Mattheo's grip on you tightened, a fierce possessiveness coloring his features. The anger that had simmered earlier was replaced by a raw protectiveness that sent shivers down your spine.

"Hey, hey," he soothed, his voice rough with emotion. "Look at me, love."

He gently tilted your chin up, wiping away a stray tear with his thumb.

"He won't ever touch you again," he growled, the words a low rumble that sent a tremor through you. "No one will ever hurt you not when I'm alive, not ever. You're safe now, my love. I've got you."

But the fear still lingered, a cold serpent coiling around my heart. Taking a shaky breath, I reached out, my hand trembling as it touched his arm. "Mattheo," I choked out, the word thick with unshed tears. "Please… don't sleep in the guest room."

The plea ripped from my lips, raw and desperate. Tears welled up again, blurring my vision. Mattheo's eyes softened, he didn't hesitate. In a swift movement, he was beside me on the bed, pulling me into his embrace. His arms wrapped around me like a protective shield, his warmth a comforting presence against the chill of fear.

Tears streamed down my face, soaking the front of his shirt. A torrent of apologies tumbled out, each word laced with guilt and regret. "I'm so sorry, Mattheo. I messed up. I lied. I shouldn't have gone. I…" My voice cracked, the words dissolving into choked sobs.

He held me tighter, his touch a silent reassurance. "Shh," he murmured again. "It's okay. You don't have to say anything."

"I don't want to break your trust," I confessed, burying my face in his chest.

A chuckle, warm and rough, vibrated against my cheek. "You never will, love. This isn't about trust. It's about your safety, baby. I can't let anything happen to you."

"But I don't want to break your trust," I insisted, pulling back slightly to look at him.

He cupped my face in his hands, his thumbs gently wiping away the fresh tears that streamed down my cheeks. Then, he leaned down, his lips brushing mine in a soft, chaste kiss.

"You didn't break my trust," he murmured against my lips. "You never will. And I…" He hesitated for a moment, his eyes searching mine. "I'm the one who should be apologizing. For shutting you out, for making you feel like you couldn't tell me the truth."

"No," I whispered. "You were right. It was dangerous. I shouldn't have gone."

He shook his head, a wry smile gracing his lips. "Maybe not. But I should have listened to you. You shouldn't have had to lie."

He shifted, pulling me closer until I was nestled against his chest, his arms wrapped tightly around me. His lips brushed over my forehead, then trailed down to my cheek, leaving a trail of warm kisses in their wake.

"No one will ever hurt you again," he whispered fiercely, his voice a vow against the darkness. "I promise."

His fingers gently working their way through my tangled hair. It was a comforting rhythm, a silent promise of safety amidst the turmoil within me.

"Sleep now, love," he whispered, his voice a warm current against your ear. "I will be there when you wake up." He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, the gesture as light as a butterfly's landing.

I snuggled deeper into him. "Promise?" i mumbled, the exhaustion finally catching up with me.

He chuckled softly, a low rumble that vibrated through his chest. "Always,"

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

[joelswritingmistress]

You Scare Me, Professor: Chapter 16

Summary: The reader is taking graduate classes at a local university in the wooded upstate New York. She is drawn to her professor, Dr. Joel Miller, though she is also inherently aware that he has something dark about him that she can't quite put her finger on. As the reader's attraction grows deeper, she has to decide whether to endure the danger or run away as fast as possible.

Warning: Brief mention of S.A.

Pairing: Professor Joel Miller x f!reader

Five-thirty in the morning. Monday. It had been the day I had been dreading since I’d been whisked away to Dr. Miller’s castle of mystery on Thursday evening. The crushing weight of my feelings overpowered the unanswered questions and the part I tried to ignore - the red flags. I was completely seduced by everything my professor had to offer, from his body to his perplexing home, to the way he looked at me and all of the secrecy involved. Magnetic was the only adjective I had in my mind that could accurately describe how things felt.

When my alarm sounded off, waking both of us, Dr. Miller turned it off and cuddled me close for another extra second or two, holding me from behind.

“I’m going to make you breakfast,” he explained, kissing the top of my shoulder. “Go take a shower.”

I turned to face him and our noses touched as I spoke. “Okay.”

Dr. Miller kissed me and my hand naturally moved to his face. Why did this day have to come? Would I ever get the chance to come back here? Were his words in the heat of our passionate weekend truthful, or just said in the moment?

“I’ll drop you off at work.”

It suddenly dawned on me that I had left my car on campus all weekend. Before I could say anything about it, Dr. Miller spoke, again, like he could read my thoughts.

“I had your car towed to your house,” he informed me. “It’s paid for. I just didn’t want anything to happen to it all weekend unattended.”

I opened my mouth to speak but then stopped.

“I hope that’s okay,” he added. “If there’s anything wrong with your car I’ll personally-”

“No,” I shook my head to let him know I wasn’t displeased. “Thank you.” I couldn't believe I hadn't even given a single thought to my car. And I couldn't even wrap my head around Dr. Miller having it towed to my house.

“I’ll pick you up from work, too,” Dr. Miller offered, and then added, “If you’d like.”

I smiled at him now, beginning to truly feel that the obsessive, little thoughts that had creeped into my brain were mutual. Dr. Miller wanted to be around me as much as I wanted to be around him. He was doting on me and making sure I was happy and content. I loved how he took care of my every need.

He pecked my lips and I took his face in both hands now and kissed him hard. Dr. Miller reciprocated, kissing me back with just as much intensity as he moved partially on top of me. After a whirlwind romance from Thursday night through Saturday, Sunday had been far more low key after the odd all-nighter that still left me uneasy during any downtime where I had too much time to think. I was ready to get back to the whirlwind.

Dr. Miller parted his lips from mine with a deep breath. “Save it for later.” He dove back in for another kiss, “You’ll be late for work.”

“So what.” I giggled and he kissed me hard again. “We have ten minutes to spare.”

“Mmm..” he grunted the word and I could tell there was a hint of playful frustration that lingered in his response. Dr. Miller’s hands locked mine down onto the bed and he moved fully on top of me. “You don't play fair.”

“Neither do you.”

I made it to work on time that morning - barely. When he dropped me off near the main entrance of the building I was thankful no one I was close with was around to ask questions.

Dr. Miller left me with a steamy kiss behind the tinted windows of his Mercedes and tapped beneath my chin with his first two fingers.

“I'll be back at three-thirty,” he assured me.

“Okay.” Our lips touched again and he waited until I was inside before driving off.

Things almost felt foreign when I walked in through the doors of the building I had been working in for so long. It wasn't the surroundings. I felt different.

“Feeling better?” One of my coworkers greeted me with a smile as I entered the office.

“A lot better.” I smiled back., “Thanks.”

All day behind my desk I went through the motions, but my mind was elsewhere. Thankfully everything on my plate that day was routine and I didn't have to think too hard about what I was doing.

My mind flashed back to all the highlights of the weekend. If I was being completely honest with myself, it was the best weekend of my life.

But where did he go Saturday night?

I knew, in time, I had to ask. I had to know.

The hours ticked by like molasses in winter. Each time I paid attention to the clock it had only ticked by in small increments.

Am I being toxic? I wondered. Is my current obsession truly unhealthy, or is it normal to feel this way about someone early in the relationship? Am I Dr. Miller’s girlfriend? Am I just some random girl to him? I didn't think the last one was true. I wasn't the most intuitive person out there, but I knew I couldn't be reading this wrong. The man dropped me off at work and offered to pick me up. He could've politely suggested I go home at any point in our long weekend together but he didn't.

I breathed and looked at the clock again, suddenly wondering where I would be sleeping that night. Another wave of excitement and anxiety washed over me at the thought. I truly felt like my brain chemistry was being altered from all the dopamine releases as of late. I wasn't complaining, but I hadn't exactly relaxed or turned my brain off for an extended period of time for well over a week - possibly a little longer.

“Hey (Y/N).” My coworker, Olivia, wheeled her chair across the low, blue carpet.

“Hey.” I smiled. “What's up?”

“You're taking classes down at Woodbridge, right?”

There was the adrenaline shot again. Anything that had to do with Woodbridge or Dr. Miller instantly put me into that hyper alert mode.

“Yeah.” I nodded nonchalantly, masking it all rather easily.

“How crazy is it about those girls who were killed?”

“I know.” I shook my head. “I was in class nearby when they found the first body. There was a whole crowd gathered around and reporters and stuff.”

“Wild.”

“I know.”

“At least they have a suspect in mind.”

“What? They do.” Olivia had my attention now.

“Yeah, it was on the news this morning. The police even raided his house this morning but he wasn't there.”

“Who is he?”

“Some guy named Alec Pryor. Registered sex offender, confessed to some seriously messed up shit in the past.”

I shuddered. “That's so scary.” I cringed. “And he was just lurking on campus.. waiting.. ugh.”

“Yeah apparently he got released back in, like, April.”

“They should never let those guys out.”

“Right!” Olivia nodded. “Sexual assault is the lowest kind of crime you can commit. The absolute worst. They should just kill those guys. Get rid of ‘em.”

“I know.” I scrunched my nose and shook my head. “So, where is he then? Did they pick him up somewhere else?”

My work friend whipped out her cell phone and began typing furiously with her thumbs before staring at the screen. She scrolled for a moment and adjusted her circular glasses before pausing as she read up on something.

“This article says..” Olivia angled her body toward mine. “They have yet to find him.” She made a face that broke the tension and made me crack a faint smile. “But they're on the hunt for him, currently.”

“Yikes.”

“Don't go anywhere alone when you're near that campus,” she advised.

“They'll catch him,” I said, only slightly confident that that was true.

“I hope so.”

“So crazy.” I repeated the name to myself. “Alec Pryor.”

“Looks like a creep.” Olivia turned her phone around and showed me a picture of the scowling, middle-aged man in a former mug shot.

“They should post his face all over the place so people are aware,” I said.

“I think they are.” She scrolled some more, “Oo, this one is calling it a ‘manhunt’.”

“That means he's on the run,” I said and added, mostly to make myself feel more secure. “He's probably hours away by now.”

Olivia shuddered and rolled back to her desk. “Be careful. That's all I'm sayin’. This is exactly why I have two German Shepherds.”

“I don't blame you.” I sighed, welcoming the interaction. It was a perfect distraction. I needed it to get my overdriven hormones somewhat back to neutral.

A little female bonding did just that, helping the work day move along a little faster.

When the day finally neared its end, I caught a glance of the Mercedes out one of the many windows in the office. I smiled to myself and hurried to finish up the last of my work and respond to the last few emails.

The time between three-fifteen and three-thirty felt like hours. As soon as the minute hand aligned vertically with the number six, I grabbed my coat and headed out the doors with a quick farewell to everybody.

I didn’t know if anyone was looking when I hopped into the passenger side of Dr. Miller’s car. I didn’t care. All I cared about was the man sitting behind the wheel.

“Hey, baby.” He flashed a cool smile in my direction as I climbed in and I slammed the door behind me.

“I love it when you call me that.” I leaned over and we shared a smoldering kiss. Again, I was thankful for the tints. I was breathless when our lips parted and settled beside him in the vehicle. Dr. Miller rested a hand on my knee as he put the car in drive and cruised out of the parking lot.

“Why don’t you let me drive you home,” he said.

I swallowed hard when he didn’t say anything more. Home? I had to go home and sit there and think of him and what he might be doing? I had to sleep without him? I had to-

“I’ll help you pack some things and then you can..” Dr. Miller shrugged, “Decide how long you want to stay at my place.”

Fuck. I calmed down immediately from the insanely frantic thoughts he caused by the dramatic pause. There was the push and pull of emotions again.

“How long am I welcome for?”

“For as long as you decide.” Dr. Miller glanced over at me as we drove and we both smirked.

“Well, then I better pack heavy.”

Dr. Miller’s grin widened as he stared out at the road. “Suit yourself.’

CLICK HERE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER

@untamedheart81 @suttonspuds @cesspitoflove @michilandcof @grogusmum @morallyinept @akah565 @brittmb115 @magpiepills @poodlebae @gobaaby-blog-blog @mermaidgirl30 @mandijo17

[idontplaytrack]

Heart of a child

AJ Campos x fem! reader

Warnings: age regression, sickfic(reader throws up), fluff, bit of coarse language

A sick day triggers a regression episode for reader.

When your alarm clock went off, you jolted awake, wincing at the sheer volume of the noise it seemed to be at. Your head was pounding, your throat was dry and scratchy, and you somehow felt warm but also freezing at the same time. You whined, shoving your phone off the nightstand after shutting the alarm off. With your face buried in your pillow, you whined.

You were sick. It’s been awhile, but still it sucked. You felt miserable from the get-go— you hadn’t even been awake for five minutes. Your phone rang, vibrating on the floor. You grumbled incoherently, rolling over to the edge of your bed you stared at it. Since the screen was facing up, you saw that it was AJ calling. You somehow managed to grab your phone from where you were laying(you didn’t have a bedframe and your mattress was on the floor, but still).

“Hey.” You said, voice cracking mid-word.

“Yeah, you’re not going to school today.” She decided.

“Yeah, no shit.” You sigh, “Sorry, have a good day though.”

“Take meds, okay? I’ll be there after school.” She replied, concerned. You could hear it in her voice.

“I’ll try.” You muttered.

“Take them.” She insisted, you whined.

“It’ll help if you have a fever or any aches and pains.” She continued, “Figured you’d be coming down with something the last time I saw you.”

“Wow.”

“I’m just saying, after awhile, I can tell if you’re coming down with something soon, you know?” She chuckles, “Stay hydrated. If you need me to get anything, please let me know whenever, alright?”

“Alright.” You sulked.

“Before I go, do you need urgent medical attention?”

“No.” You giggled at how serious she seemed to be, “I’m pretty sure that it’s just a cold or the flu.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes, AJ. I’m sure.” You exhaled, “You’re talking to me now, do you think I sound like I’m gonna pass out or something?”

“Okay, alright.” She smiles, “Rest up, stay hydrated, eat something if you can. I’ll see you in a few hours. Okay, honey?”

“Okay.” You licked your lips, swallowing painfully. It felt like you were swallowing glass.

“Bye, I love you.” She replies, making a kissy noise.

“Love you too.” You said quietly before she hung up.

Obviously AJ had to go to classes and all so she couldn’t just stay online and talk to you. As a result, your day kinda dragged on. It felt like time was passing by extra slowly. But you were also groggy so that made you pass right back out for a couple more hours before you got out of bed to try and eat something before you took the medicine.

You’d gotten a text from AJ thirty minutes ago, and another from Gabi twenty minutes ago both asking how you were doing. You curtly responded to Gaby’s text saying you were fine. Then you were in AJ’s chat— you apologised for the late response, letting her know that you’d just woken up again. You also shot her a second text to tell her that you were having some oatmeal before she got on your case about why you weren’t having anything to eat.

You ate quite slowly, feeling an uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach. You hated throwing up— in fact, you were terrified of it. And you had no one here with you. You didn’t have AJ here with you. Oh God, you didn’t have AJ here with you.

You swallowed thickly, staring at the spoonful of maple syrup oatmeal. You took a deep breath and dropped the spoon, deciding not to take another bite. As you got up from the barstool, you phone buzzed, but you ignored it and made your way to the medicine cabinet in the bathroom down the hall. You took out the ibuprofen and Zofran, along with the thermometer. But first things first, you popped a Zofran into your mouth and let it sit under your tongue for it to dissolve and absorb. You were hoping that it would tide you over. Still unsure, you leaned against the sink countertop as you took the other pill then put them away. You hung around in the bathroom for a good twenty minutes before you decided it was okay to step away.

————

You sat on the couch in front of the TV, anxious and trying to pass the time. You were watching whatever was on right now and also nodding off every now and then since nothing was particularly interesting. You still had a couple hours until school let out and you were honestly so very restless. So, you just sat there and was eventually staring into space. Your mind wanders, and before you knew it you're fully spaced out.

The sickening feeling bubbles back up after awhile and fails to die down no matter what you tried. You knew you were anxious. So that definitely contributed to whatever you were feeling, you think. So you attempted to help yourself by taking some deep breaths, but it barely did anything for you. When your phone went off, you got a shock, snapping out of your thoughts.

AJ was calling you again. So you picked up, of course.

“Hello?” You gulped.

“Hi, honey.” She said back, “I’m on my way to yours right now, okay? I’ll be right there.”

You sniffled, “Okay.” You nodded even though she couldn’t see you. That feeling…the nausea you hated it. You didn’t want to be experiencing that, you didn’t want to throw up. You didn’t even want to think about it. You didn’t even want to think about it. Those thoughts kept swimming around in your head, over and over and over. Your chest heaved, sweat beading at the side of your head as you clutched onto the armrest of the couch. Out of sheer frustration, you started to cry. A painful lump too quickly forming in your throat. You inhaled shakily, throwing your head back on the headrest blinking the tears away— actually, more of it fell instead. You screwed your eyes shut, feeling absolutely exhausted from your racing mind. Your body ached, everywhere. You needed AJ.

You were curled up in the corner of the couch in the meantime, staring at the TV. Really, you were just staring at the screen, not a clue what was even going on in the show. When the front door open, you whipped your head around to see that AJ was here. “Oh, there you are.” AJ shut the door behind herself and locked it back up.

“Hi, honey.” She crouched down, stroking your cheek.

You hesitantly focused your eyes on hers, then she continued, “I’m right here, I’m gonna take good care of you, hm?”

You swallowed your spit harshly, “My tummy hurts. I don’t like it.” You hiccuped, “I don’t like it.”

AJ trusted her gut for this, she helped you sit up. “I know, I know, baby. It doesn’t feel good.” She helped you stand up, hoping to take you to the bathroom, but your stomach did a much unwanted somersault and you whimpered.

AJ panics for a moment but spots the trash can by the coffee table. She grabs that and held it under your chin, following you as you plopped back onto the couch. You were basically throwing a tantrum and freaking out over having to throw up. “Shhh.” She rubs your back, “I have you, just let it out. Baby, don’t worry, don’t hold it.”

“No…” You cried.

“Sweetie, please. You’ll feel better after, I promise.” AJ continues, hand still rubbing your back as she watches you fight the urge to vomit. “Baby, please let it out.”

As much as you were dreading actually having to throw up, with AJ right next to you, keeping an eye on you, you had to let it happen. You felt like absolute shit trying to fight that feeling.

You spilled your stomach’s contents into the trash can, throat stinging from the stomach acid. “Baby, baby, no. Don’t look at it.” She coaxed, “That’s it, let it all out, I got you.”

She held the trash can there until you completely stopped even dry-heaving. Thankfully, like she said, you did feel better.

“That’s it, good girl. Good job, baby.” She smiles, getting up from her seat to take care of the trash can promptly. After that, she was right next to you once again. You got up and went to the bathroom to rinse out your mouth and wash your face with AJ following right behind you.

“You want some water?” She asked quietly.

You shook your head no as you dragged your feet back outside. “I still feel funny.”

“You might for a couple days, but you’ll be just fine.” She snaked an arm around your waist. “How about a popsicle?”

“Okay.” You followed her to the kitchen, then back to the couch. She opened that up for you and you slowly ate it while she cuddled with you. After awhile, you only snuggled closer and closer— this clinginess was a telltale sign that you were regressed. Which she figured out the second you opened up your mouth to talk to her when she arrived. She knew your triggers, she knew how to handle you, she knew how to take care of you to make sure you were safe and happy— as much as possible, though you clearly weren’t happy now being under the weather and all.

“Baby.” She hums, “When you feel better later, let’s try and eat something, alright? I’ll make you some soup. And you can have it with—”

“Goldfish?”

“Goldfish. Sure, baby. Whatever you like.” AJ nods, pressing a kiss to the side of your head, “As long as you’re happy. I’m just glad you’re in a better mood now, my love.”

“That was yucky.” You sniffed.

“Mm, I know, baby.” She scratches your scalp, “But do you feel better now?”

“Yeah.” You nodded.

“Yeah? That’s so good.” AJ said back, “Did you get any sleep?”

“Lil bit.” You told her, “I need tissue. I need—”

She interjects before you got flustered, “I got it, I got. That’s okay. It’s just a little bit of the melted popsicle.”

You chewed on your lip, taking a deep breath before you got more agitated.

————

While your temperature was still down, AJ helps you with a quick shower. Following that, was to get some food into your system so you could take another dose of the medications.

“Will you just sit right here for me, baby? Give me a few minutes to heat you up some soup, yeah?”

“Okay.” You sat down at the dining table just like she’d told you to, resting your chin on folded arms as you watched her work in the kitchen.

And well, honestly? You didn’t have an appetite at all. So when the soup was done, she asked you to eat and you threw another tantrum. Who could blame you? Right now, in your head, you thought you were four. That’s what kids do when they weren’t having it. Not to mention that you cried so so easily when you were sick. AJ knew that, she knew what to expect. And it always made her heartache seeing you cry. Especially on days where you were not feeling well. You had issues expressing yourself as it was during regression, being sick was an added challenge. But AJ was not one to just give up and leave you to fend for yourself. No.

“Sit here, baby.” She gestured for you to sit on her lap.

You sulked, shaking your head, your hand clutching onto your little blanket. “y/n, sit here please, baby. You need to eat something, I know you’re so hungry. Please? I promise when you feel better we’ll go to the playground, or the trampoline park.”

You complied at last, she bites back a sigh of relief, wrapping an arm around you as you lowered yourself onto her lap. “Good girl.” Her palm stays on your abdomen, the warmth providing you some much needed comfort. “I’ll feed you, okay?”

Sniffling, you mumbled, “Okay.”

AJ patiently fed you the chicken noodle soup — with Goldfish crackers for the next thirty minutes until you said you didn’t want any more. “You’re sure, honey?”

“Yeah, I’m full.” You replied.

“That’s great.” She smooches your cheek, “Do you wanna take a nap?”

You didn’t say anything but shifted a little so you could hook your arms around her neck. Again, clingy. But she adored these moments.

“I’d say so.” She chuckles, “Just stay awake for me a few minutes longer, hm?” AJ felt your forehead, then decided the next dose would be the right choice— the temperature seemed to be creeping back, considering how much less chatty you were compared to when you were eating.

“I’m ‘eepy.” You whined, rubbing your eyes.

“Honey, you need the medicine so you won’t wake up sick.” She said softly, “Stay right there, baby. Okay? I’ll be just a minute.”

You were getting cranky but she needed you to take the meds, no matter what. Otherwise the fever would come right back. She also thought to give you an antihistamine for your runny nose. But since you were in the headspace of a four-year old, you could not swallow pills. So, she had to dig through the medicine cabinet for the liquid versions of both of those medications. Thank goodness she managed to find them— thank goodness you didn’t run out of them.

AJ measured out the dosages in those tiny little cups then got out a juice box for you. While you fought the very strong urge to nod off.

“Here we go. A juice box, for after you drink these up.” She held up one of the tiny cups for you, and you took it, scrunching up your nose in disgust.

“Go on.” She urged.

You shook your head.

“You’re sleepy.” She sighs, “Please take it. Here, I’ll open up the juice box for you, okay? Please?”

You studied the two liquids briefly before you gave in and quickly downed them both. You shuddered at the bitter aftertaste while AJ instantly stuck the straw of the juice box in your mouth. “Good job.” She praised, “See? Wasn’t so hard, was it?”

“Up.” You pouted, arms held out. AJ loved carrying you way too much, and you usually didn’t let her, so it mainly only happened during these times.

“Aw, come on. Let’s go get some rest.” She picked you up easily, your legs hooked around her on either of her side while your chin rested on her shoulder, and arms around her neck.

She set you down and tucked you in snuggly under the covers before getting in next to you.

“Close your eyes.” She hums, caressing your abdomen for a bit then patting the area to coax you to sleep.

“I want a song.” You requested quietly.

“Of course.” She smiled at you, you smiled back and once your eyes closed, AJ started to sing. “Sleep tight, sweet girl. I’m right here if you need me.”

“Well, I feel like the time's just slipping away

And it seems that the road gets rougher each day

Sometimes I get caught up

With little things that just don't matter

I remember how I used to swing from a rope

One that sat on the hills just above Jackson's Cove

Sometimes I close my eyes

And just go back to that little girl

I wanna run

I wanna fall

I wanna take every chance that's given to me

Live this life like I've got nothing to hide

Free and wild

With the heart of a child

With the heart of a child

Try to be everything to everybody but you

But the truth is you ain't got nothing to prove

You only get one chance

Only one trip around this world and

I wanna run

I wanna fall

I wanna take every chance that's given to me

Live this life like I've got nothing to hide

Free and wild

With the heart of a child

I wanna chase down a dream

With nothing to break my fall

Just risk it all

And have no regrets

And never forget

To run

And fall

I wanna take every chance that's given to me

And live this life like I've got nothing to hide

Free and wild

With a smile

And the heart of a child

And the heart of a child”

🏷️Tag list:

@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @ludoesartandstuff @pda128

💭A/N:

I thought this was a little draggy lol.🫠

[world-of-aus]

More Than Business II

Pairing: Biker!Bucky x Baker!Reader

Warnings: Fluff, no really just fluff.

Author’s Note: There will be one more part to this little series before we wrap up Biker Bucky and his sweet Baker. Thank you all for reading, I hope you enjoy this latest update, all other parts can be found on @worldofausupdates​! Enjoy buns.

Your bakery was its usual buzz, despite the open after hours.

“Well now hold on a minute,” one of you regulars Santiago, owner of ‘Santiagos Satin’ blurts out, “if y/n say’s we can trust the 107, and they’ve given us no reason not to shouldn’t we be less wary of this offer they’re laying down for us, surely there’s a reason Mr. Barnes is wanting our help, this could be big for all of us!”

“Santiago’s right,” Marie, owner of ‘Maries Mazing Muffins’ agrees, “think of the business this could bring in for all of us, especially with the people the 107 are likely tied to, we could see many of our business boom because of this festival!”

The buzz in your bakery grows, the various business owners that make-up the block all sharing their thoughts over one another. “What do you think y/n,” Meredith chirps up quieting the others, “do you think we can trust Mr. Barnes and the 107 – you think joining this festival would be a wise investment?”

Your bakery grows quiet all eyes on you as they wait for your answer, “In order to trust you must give trust, and I think James and the men of the 107 have earned our trust. Like Santiago mentioned they’ve given us no reason to be wary of them, and Marie drove a good point this could be the turning point for a lot of the businesses on the block.” You can still see the wariness in some eyes so you continue, “I can understand the uneasiness; but then tell me, when have the 107 ever given you reason not to trust them? Marie when your sign was scattered in broken shards all over your walkway who was there the next morning to clean up and ensure you had the fees to cover a new sign? Meredith, when someone came into yours and Willie’s shop and ran off with the roses from your stand out front who strolled in minutes later with the teen and your roses? Alice, when you and your dad’s one working iron stove went out who pulled through and had a delivery out front within the thirty minutes of it breaking?’

You’re finally seeing a reaction as many of their gazes fall to the ground, a sudden guilt creeping over their features as they let your words settle over them. “She’s right,” Alice speaks up, all eyes falling to the teen, “Mr. Barnes and the 107 have really only offered us there help but we’ve been too blind to it because of the fee collection at the beginning of every month, it feels like they’re stealing from our businesses when really they’ve been collecting on our behalf, they’ve fixed every expense for us without being told too.”

The quiet murmurs of the others begins to rise through your shop, the other tenants on the block all chiming in their thoughts with one another. “So what,” Alice’s dad starts, “what’s the plan here, what do you expect we do y/n?” As if giving your response the quiet rumble of several bikes rattle through your shop, the quiet murmurs becoming loud as the other business owners eyes drift to the windows of your shop before drifting back to you in a questioning worry.

Your smile is sheepish as you step towards your door, “I’m sorry to spring this on all of you, but you’ve only heard their story from others in passing, you’ve only grazed the cover page.” The key clicks in place, lock turning, knob going along with it as Bucky pushes your bakery door open, soft smile grazing his pink lips as the others of the 107 trail in behind him, their smiles just as welcoming as their leaders.

Their forms loom behind you, bright smiles pasted on all their lips as they look over their tenants. Bucky steps forward then strong arm falling over your shoulder as he brings you closer, you silently pass the floor over to Bucky then, fingers squeezing his side reassuringly. The brunette clears his throat before he speaks to the quiet room, “I know many of you are unsure of us, and it may feel like what I’m asking is already a lot to what we ask for at the beginning of every month but I find I need to ask anyway. The group and I are asking you all to come together with us and help us put together a fun festival for not only the people in our town, but for the neighboring towns as well. We’re hoping with your help we can showcase parts of our town that make it special, that make it ours, and I believe that by hosting a festival such as this one, it’ll have more people dropping in, bringing in more sales that will drive all the shops in our area.”

The soft murmurs begin again, “pardon Mr. Barnes,” one of the tenants pipes up from the back, “but aren’t you in the least bit worried that the extended invitation may fall into the wrong hands?” You can feel the moment he tenses beneath your fingers, but he masks it well as he pulls on that warm smile, “it’s been a thought of ours,” he answers as he looks over to his brothers, “but we’ve been in talk with the others from the towns neighboring us, and have come in agreement, that our people will be safe during this festival, security will be high, we know the risks that come with lowered guards.”

“And do you know those you’re hiring for security?”

“It’ll be your very own amongst the other clubs joining us,” Bucky answers. The murmurs grow, “this festival isn’t for us, but for all of you, it’s our way of giving back to all of you for all the times you’ve given to us,” Bucky meets your gaze then, “we want you all to feel like your family, like you can come to us should a problem arise, we don’t want you to fear those who are here solely to make sure your protected and cared for.”

The murmurs grow to quieted conversations as their tenants check in with one another, you watch as they come to their conclusions. “Do we have a deadline for booths,” one chimes in, “we can’t just put anything out you know,” another adds, “if we’re to represent our town and what it stands for we need to gather and prepare our best.”

Grins spread through your bakery your own pulling at your lips as you can’t help but to jump in place. “Whatever you need,” Bucky chimes in over the excitement growing, “the 107 and its members are here to serve you.”

An unexpected but welcomed cheer sounds through your bakery, your hands squeezing Buckys sides as you watch two family’s come as one before you. Your gaze meets his warm one, “told you it would work,” you grin before you’re looking back into the intermingled crowd.  

“Everyone,” you speak up, “please feel free to help yourselves to some baked goods and refreshments – on me,” you add despite the groans of protest from your neighbors. Bucky leans into your side voice low amongst the loud mingling chatter, “can I see you in your office?”

“Told you it would work,” you say as you lean up against your desk hands hoisting yourself up onto the wooden oak. Bucky’s shutting the door behind himself, “and I have you to thank for it, I don’t think I would have had the same reaction if it wouldn’t have been for you asking everyone to meet here and asking them to hear us out.”

A smile pulls at your lips, legs crossing as you watch him close the distance between the two of you, “give yourself credit Barnes, I’m only responsible for hosting this meeting, everything else laid out was all you.” A mirrored smile pulls at his lips, soft chuckle meeting your ears as he cages you in, hands on each side of you, “maybe, but I still couldn’t have done this without you.”

“Well you know what I think, I think regardless of the part I played here the reaction you got out there was all because of you.” Bucky’s hand finds yours, “you put your part in Buck, and you need to continue to do so, you’ll find that overtime they’ll become as welcoming as I am. What,” you question over a laugh at the look he gives you.

He lifts both your hands, fingers curling with yours, your heart beating like a wild drum in your chest mouth going dry as you follow his actions. “don’t think anyone could quite meet up to you.” You lick over your lips, “what do you mean,” you question though you’re sure you knew what he meant you just wanted to hear it, needed to hear it to believe that what you felt wasn’t just one-sided like you had allowed yourself to believe that night.

“Your selfless, kind, welcoming, loving, you’ve never judged a person before getting to know them – you see the good in people even when they can’t see it in themselves.”

“I like to believe there’s good in everyone, they just need a little help finding it,” your murmur eyes locking with his.

“You’re not afraid,” he adds, “always seeing the positive in something that others might see negative.”

“Ma did always say I was an optimistic.”

That brings a smile to his lips, “Your ma wasn’t wrong sugar, you’re a breath of fresh air, you make others around you want to do good by you, do good just to be around you.”

“You know I’ve already forgiven you for that night right,” you tease drawing a low chuckle from the man before you, “don’t think you were even mad at me to begin with, which you should have been, I shouldn’t have said what I said that night, it’s not what I wanted to say.”

“And what would you have preferred to say that night?”

“I would have preferred to have taken you up on your offer to stop by with those treats,” he answers, “and then when you did show up with them I would have asked you if you wanted to stay awhile because I don’t see our visits as business transactions, they may have been that  at first, but it wasn’t long before you had me seeing it as more – there was something about you that had me wanting to come around you and the first of the month wasn’t cutting it for me anymore, but I let the fear of what could happen to you get the better of me. You’re to kind for my world.”

“I can protect myself Buck,” you find yourself saying, “but I also know that you wouldn’t let anything happen to me either if it ever came down to it.”

“I have no doubt that you can protect yourself sugar, you’ve showed me time and time again that you can hold your own and that of others because that’s just who you are.”

“So,” you hum deciding to push your luck, “does that mean you’ll let me come drop off some treats at the clubhouse?”

Bucky somehow steps in closer, your breath hitching at the action, “you can come by anytime you’d like, treats or not, I was actually hoping to show you around the clubhouse after the festival, give you a tour of things – is that something you’d like?”

A smile pulls at your lips, “I’d really like that Buck, I'd really like that.”

[allbark-no-bite]

Silver Fox || Elvis Presley x reader

summary: in which Elvis decides not to dye his hair for once and it makes him that much more irresistible

warnings: mentions of smut, foul language

word count: 2.2k

author’s note: i’m in love with this one. y’all know i can’t resist some good domestic Elvis

I did not come from a kind home. I came from a home with slamming doors and shaking walls and air that was always thick with tension. My parents were turbulent, constantly tipping the scale with weeks of silence and then explosive nuclear rage. So I had always promised myself that I would find a partner who was kind. So that even on the days that love was not enough, there would still be kindness.

I'll always say my life began when I met Elvis. I fell in love with him first for his personality. He was so delicately mild mannered, and yet bursting with life. Even before we had children, he showed me what a real family was, and what ours could be like. 

His parents welcomed me with open arms. It had been the three of them against the world until all the fame, so although their family wasn't large, their bond was strong. I think Gladys was thrilled to have a daughter to dote on as well.

And as they say, a home with kindness breeds quickly. His parents, his cousins, the Memphis Mafia, their children, we all became a family. Our home at Graceland was soon filled with love, large meals, and laughter.

Years passed, and we had kids of our own. It became a problem really, the rate at which we produced children. We had our first baby a few weeks after he was discharged from the army (a last minute visit home had occurred eight months prior).

Eugene had barely begun walking before I was swollen again, six months pregnant with our second boy. Elvis was only twenty, and his career was skyrocketing. Truthfully, I liked to believe it was a blessing that we had started having kids so young. With Elvis' life that involved traveling constantly, and a career that asked for his home life and job to coexist as one, his youth enabled him to have the energy to go from touring one day to wrangling toddlers down for a nap the next. And he did it all with a smile.

We had agreed that after our third child, we were going to put a halt to the baby making—at least temporarily. Three young boys were a lot to handle, even with the help of his family. When it came down to it, our lives were already so busy as it was. We lasted a good eight years before Emily Joe came alone. And then once you have four, you might as well have five.

—

Elvis is lounging with his back against the railing of the porch, white sock clad feet crossed in front of him as he chats with Sonny and Joe. There's a coffee mug in his hand containing tea, an attempt to soothe his throat after a few strenuous weeks of performing. As usual, his casual attire consists of a silky black button up and dark jeans.

The sight makes me smile to myself from the doorway. The colors perfectly compliment his salt and pepper flecked hair, something he had only recently been allowing to show through. At thirty-five, Elvis had started greying much quicker than most, it just didn't show due to him dying it constantly. But with his schedule finally clear of any performances for the next week or so, he'd tossed the boxed dye aside in favor of letting it grow out. Flashes of silver and white lick through his otherwise stark black hair. While the change made him slightly uneasy, I thought it was the most attractive thing in the entire world.

Eventually he looks away from his conversation with Joe and catches me staring. With a bemused smile and a twinkle in his blue eyes, he uncrosses his feet and spreads his thighs, holding out an arm to pull me between his legs.

"What sonofabitch let you outta the house lookin' that pretty?" he teases, his voice low and throaty as he squeezes my shoulder and kisses affectionately into my hair.

I slap his firm chest and am met with solid resistance. "I know you don't kiss your mama with that mouth, Elvis Presley."

We'd been married for over ten years, and he still flirted with me just as much now as he did when we were dating. I'd been smart enough to marry the man for his character and lucky enough to love him for his looks. Elvis was just as good looking as he was in his teenage years, if not even more so. He had aged like fine French wine.

"C'mon, mama. Sweet thing like you carryin' my baby, I'm a lucky man," he purrs.

If I thought Elvis was handsy before, he was ten times worse when I was pregnant. Where ever I went, he always followed close behind, grasping my elbow to steady me or hovering nearby, at the ready for whatever I needed.

I laugh at him, only able to shake my head in response. "You're insatiable."

He had been between my thighs this morning, licking and sucking and nipping until my knees were quivering beside his face. I had to weakly push his head away after I'd come a second time on his tongue. Even afterwards, he had sat me on the bathroom counter top and made me taste myself on his lips.

He passes a hand under the swell of my stomach while leaning down to capture my lips in a gentle but savory kiss. "No, just horny," he whispers, as he pulls away just slightly, blue eyes mischievous, intending his last sentence purely for my own ears.

"Could the two of you at least wait until this one's born before you start makin' the next one," Sonny groans from the other side of the porch. "I've got enough godchildren for the time being."

Cheeks burning, I pull away from our extremely close proximity, but Elvis keeps me trapped between his legs. Joe is chuckling beside Sonny, the rest of the Mafia snickering from their various states of inhabitation on the porch.

Elvis lets out a short huff of a laugh, kicking back again against the railing. "Baby factory is closed," he informs them, running a hand through his silver flecked hair. "Damn kids are turnin' me grey."

I raise an eyebrow at him. "You said that after Ernest." As if to prove my point, a scream echos from the yard behind us.

"Daddy!!"

A tiny four year old comes running up the porch steps, her arms held up in the air as she grabs for Elvis. Chestnut colored bangs fall into her round, doll shaped face, which is visibly upset. I was immensely surprised, when after having three children who looked like mirror images of Elvis, Emily took after me.

Before Elvis can even reach out to her, his hands preoccupied with my hips, Red swoops her off of her feet and into his arms.

There came a point after raising all of our kids together for so many years, that we often didn't think twice about who's kid was who's. They all probably thought they were siblings anyhow.

Just satisfied that she's gotten someone's attention, the toddler hiccups while trying to catch her breath. "U-Uncle Red, Eugene is— is bein' mean to Michael."

Back in the yard, the rest of the kids are running rampant in the yard, our dog darting around them as they toss a football. What had started as an organized football game looks to have turned into a squabble between the older boys. They tug on each other's clothes and shove their supposed teammates into the dirt. At the heart of the chaos are the eldest of the Presley children, Eugene and Micheal. The blonde seventeen year old has his feet planted to the ground, the latter's head locked between his elbow with no intention of letting go anytime soon. Michael's hands grab desperately at his brother, his feet scrambling wildly as he tries to escape. Eugene only grips him tighter.

With the pair so close in age, it seemed as though fights were becoming more and more inevitable. The teenagers quarreled like two cats forced to share a box, and fur was sure to fly. They tumbled down stairs and broke glasses and even noses from time to time (Micheal's once perfect button nose was still slightly askew). Elvis had told me a thousand times that it was all in good fun, but it still made me nervous.

One of Joe' boys tumbles into the pair, followed by Ernest, causing Eugene to stagger sideways. The blonde refusing to let go of his brother, Michael is forced along with him. Despite whatever minor argument had likely initiated the petty dispute, neither was giving in.

Back on the porch, Red just chuckles, tutting in pretend disapproval. "Awh, they're just pretendin', Em. You ain't gotta worry about them."

Still slightly distraught, Emily sniffs and wipes her eyes. While the Red and the rest of the mafia just laugh, finding the situation amusing, Emily and I do not.

Hands on my hips, I move to the edge of the porch. "Eugene Presley! Let go of your brother before you hurt him."

At the sound of my voice, the boys' wild flailing comes to a halt; however, Eugene doesn't release Michael just yet. The older boy's blue eyes shift from me to his father standing beside me, as if to gauge how serious I'm being.

Elvis, who had been only mildly concerned before my intervention, chuckles while placing a steadying hand at the small of my back. If it had been up to him, he likely would have allowed them to continue, but he would do anything to dim my worries. "Alright, that's enough. Let 'im go."

The moment Eugene loosens his hold, Micheal is shoving his brother away from him, a disgruntled look on his face. They start for the porch, taking our intervention as their queue to wrap up their game. Both of them look as though they've been drug through the dirt. Micheal's stock of blonde hair is rumpled throughly, and Eugene has a red welp on his cheek.

"Ma, Micheal started it," the boy defends as he reaches a closer earshot, sounding ten years younger than he is.

"DID NOT—," Micheal interjects, his body swiveling back in the other boy's direction,  but Elvis is quick to grab Micheal by the collar of his shirt before another fight breaks out.

He pulls the teenager towards him and wraps a heavy arm around his shoulders. Eugene raises an unamused eyebrow at his brother. "Give it a rest you two," Elvis says, laughing. There was a reason he was the fun parent.

Noticing that one of her brothers now has Elvis' attention, Emily slips out of Red's hold and scampers over to him, holding up her arms once again. "Me too, Daddy," she pleads, her tiny fingers grasping at the air.

Humming in amusement at his little girl, Elvis leans down and scoops her into his arms, emitting an exaggerated grunt as he does so. "I'm gettin' too old for this, little miss."

I rub a hand over my stomach thoughtfully, gazing at my husband fondly. No matter what he thought of himself, grey haired or not, thirty-four or seventy-four, he was still the wide-eyed boy I had married.

With the hand not on my stomach, I ruffle Ernest's hair, who had joined us with the rest of the kids on the porch. At twelve, he was four years younger than Micheal and hadn't become too cool for me just yet. He leans into me, his eyes drooping tiredly. Emily is already asleep in Elvis' arms.

"Alright, everyone," I announce, looking to my two younger kids but addressing everyone. "Time for bed."

Sonny, Joe, and Red, as well as the rest of the Mafia members are long gone, headed off for their respective homes by the time I come down the stairs from putting Emily to bed. She had begged for Elvis to sing to her, but with his voice still strained, I thought it best that he rested.

I find him still on the porch, soaking in the last of the cool evening. Elvis turns when he hears the door close behind me, and a smile overtakes his face. He opens his arms to me, pulling me into his chest once I'm close enough. At least, as close as he can with my growing stomach.

“How’re ya doin’, mama?”

I cup his jaw, my thumb stroking his cheek. His hooded doe eyes gaze at me warmly. "I’m doin’ just fine. How are you?”

Elvis rubs soothing circles into my sides. “Couldn’t be better. I’ve got my family, my beautiful, wonderful, amazing’ wife right here with me—”

I stop him, my thumb brushing over his lips. “That’s not really what I meant. You made a comment earlier... 'bout gettin' old... you know there is not a world in which I do not adore you."

He smiles against my thumb. “The grey really gets you goin’ huh? I meant it when I said the baby factory was closed.”

I laugh, kissing the corner of his mouth. “That doesn’t mean we can’t practice.”

[storytowrite]

|Because I’m obsessed with you ~ Yang Jeongin|

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Theme: Jeongin x Reader

Warnings: IN is a kind of stalker

Word Count: 5,155

Summary: I.N becomes Y/N's friend but his obsession with her is a little bit disturbing

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was a dark September evening. You were coming back home from work tired both mentally and physically. You were living alone in a small neighbourhood. You had moved from your parents before  you started your studies and since then you were living on your own. 

The evening was cold and rainy. Not the best weather though. You were shivering because of your thin jacket. You were angry with yourself. Why didn’t you take a thicker jacket? And what made you come back home late in the evening? 

You finished your work a few hours ago but had decided to go with your coworkers for some drinks. So that’s why now you were completely annoyed by your previous decision. You hated going back home alone. You felt uneasy then. Most of the time your friendly neighbour, Chan, would come with you, but he was out of the town with some of his friends, visiting his family in Australia. 

You sighed heavily. You still had about a thirty minute walk to your small house. At this hour none of the buses were available. There was also no live soul around. Suddenly you heard some noise behind you. You quickened your steps being scared and not able to turn around. But the sound got louder. 

‘Aish! Mojo, come here! Don’t scare people!’ You’ve heard. Suddenly you stopped moving and laid down on the pavement. ‘I’m so sorry. Are you okay?’  A quite tall, young man was standing above you. He looked at you concerned. He gave you a hand to help you stand up. ‘I really am sorry. Mojo sometimes, well most of the time to be honest, doesn’t listen to me.’ 

‘It’s okay, I’m good, thank you.’ You smiled a little and looked at the white Samoyed, Mojo, who caused your fall. ‘So he made me fall?’ You asked laughingly. The dog looked at you back with curious eyes. 

‘Yeah… Sorry about that… Woah, you are really beautiful.’ He said quietly more to himself than to you. ‘Ehm… I’m sorry but what’s your name?’ The boy scratched his neck. 

‘I’m Y/N. Nice to meet you.’ You introduced yourself. ‘And you are…’ 

‘I’m Yang Jeongin, but my friends call me IN.’ He winked. ‘Do you live in this neighbourhood? I haven’t seen you here before….’ 

‘Yes, I live at the end of the street.’ You answered his question, petting Mojo on his head. 

‘You shouldn’t be walking here on your own. It’s not safe.’ IN said. ‘Do you want me to walk you home?’ 

‘I would use some company.’ You smiled. ‘Thank you.’ 

You both started to walk towards your house. You were looking at him with a corner of your eye from time to time. He was very handsome. His foxy eyes were scanning all the area. His dark brown hair was fluffy and probably soft when touched. 

‘So Y/n…’ The boy broke the silence between the two of you. ‘Why are you all alone so late at night?’ 

‘I was at work and then we went to grab some drinks… Usually Chan, my friend, walks me home, but currently he’s on holiday with some of his friends.’ You replied. 

‘Channie hyung?’ He questioned. ‘Aaah so you are the girl he was talking about. That makes sense.’ 

‘You know him?’ Your brows frowned. You shouldn’t have been surprised though. Chan indeed knew a lot of people. He had this ability to make friends with everyone. You were sure that if he stands in front of the kidnapper, he will definitely befriend him and make him change his way of living. 

‘Yes, we have some mutual friends. Also we jog every morning.’ The boy answered, smiling cutely. ‘He mentioned you a few times though.’ 

‘Oh really? And what did he say?’ You asked curiously. 

‘All good things… noona. Can I call you like that?’ 

‘I don’t know, can you?’ You asked teasingly. ‘You’ve called Chan hyung, so I guess I’m older than you though.’ 

‘Good.’ He smiled which made his foxy eyes even smaller. In your mind he looked purely cute. ‘Thank you noona.’ The accent at the last word made you goosebumps. You had to admit there was something about this boy. You instantly smiled at him. 

‘Thank you for walking me back home.’ You said. ‘To be honest I was really uncertain. I don’t like going back home so late at night.’ 

‘It’s okay. I can give you my number, so next time when Channie hyung is absent you can call me.’ He proposed. 

‘Yeah, that would be great.’ You smiled. ‘And I’m glad that I met you IN. I thought that there was some creepy guy or a murderer…’ 

‘Too many horror movies, huh?’ He asked laughingly. 

‘Yeah, you could say that.’ You admitted. You both stood in front of your front door. You smiled at the boy widely. ‘Thanks again for walking me home IN.’ 

‘You are welcome noona. So… till the next time? But if you want to meet, just text me.’ He gave you his number, and you gave him yours. 

‘See you next time IN, goodnight.’ You smiled and entered your house. He stood for a while in your front yard, but when you completely disappeared from his sighed, he moved towards his house. 

For the next few days you were busy with your work and came back home pretty late at night. Every night IN would walk you home with Mojo. You were glad that this decent young man decided to go with you. You felt really good with his company. He replaced Chan’s place though, but you didn’t mind that. 

You and IN became closer. You called him all the time. He walked you home in the evening, but during the day you both were chatting. You started to open up more to him. So did he. You both grew some kind of bond and your friendship started to be stronger and stronger. 

One night Jeongin couldn't walk you home. He had some projects to do for his studies. So you decided to go by yourself. Surely you could take a cab but you wanted to walk, as usual. The weather wasn’t that bad for late autumn. 

Once you were close to your house, you stopped for a while. Something was off and you could sense it. You looked at your house. There were some dirty marks on your porch. Someone had been at your front door. There were a lot of wet footprints there. Also someone had scratched your door and painted a small sign on it. 

You immediately felt like your heart started to beat faster out of the fear. Someone marked your house. You were afraid to enter it. You didn’t know what to do so the first thing you could think about was to make a phone call. You grabbed your phone and phoned Chan, but he still was unavailable due to his leave, so the second person you had called was none other like Jeongin. With your heart dropping from your chest you were waiting for him to answer. 

‘Hello noona? Is everything alright?’ He asked with a little sleepy voice. You couldn’t blame him, it was pretty late at night. 

‘IN… I… Because someone… and…’ You started but you couldn’t say a word. 

‘Woah, Y/N calm down. What happened? Do you want me to come over?’ He asked, concerned. 

‘Y-yes please… I’m outside my house.’ You answered and your voice stuttered. 

‘Why don’t you enter your place?’ He asked with curiosity. 

‘I can’t… Innie please, come as fast as you can. PLEASE!’ 

‘Give me ten minutes at maximum.’ He hung up. You stood on your own for a while observing the whole area around your place. Not able to move you were counting minutes. 

After six minutes Jeongin suddenly appeared in front of you. His breathing was rapid and intermittent. He must have been running. He was wearing sweatpants and an oversized hoodie. It was the first time you had seen him with such casual clothes. 

‘Y/N? Are you okay? What happened?’ He asked worriedly. 

‘Someone had been at my door. They scratched it and left footprints… I don’t want to enter my house.’ You said quickly and with an instant moment you hugged him tightly. ‘I’m sorry for calling for you that late, but I was too scared and…’ 

‘Shhh, don’t be sorry noona, it’s alright. Have you called the police?’ He asked, concerned. 

‘No, no I didn’t… Should I do this?’ 

‘Yes, you should, but maybe we will enter your house first? It’s a little chilly.’ 

‘But I’m…’ 

‘Don’t worry Y/N. I’ll go first.’ He answered and took your keys from your hand. He easily opened the front door and entered it. You were waiting outside. IN turned on the lights and checked all the rooms. Then he came back to you. ‘It’s okay Y/N, no one is there, come inside, okay?’ He grabbed your hand gently and led you to the living room sitting you on the couch. ‘Do you want me to stay a night here? I’ve checked everything, but if you…’

‘Yes Innie, please stay. I don’t want to be here all alone.’ You had answered before he could finish his sentence. 

‘Of course… I’ll make you tea,  okay?’ He asked and you nodded. For a while you were left alone, but you couldn’t move. Your whole body was trembling. You didn’t feel safe in your own house. ‘Here, drink it. You will feel better.’ He said handing you a cup of tea. You’d drunk it obediently. 

‘Thank you Innie. And I’m sorry for making you come here so late at.. ’  You said with a weak smile. 

‘Don’t be noona. I’ve told you I’m at your service.’ He winked and didn’t let you finish a sentence. ‘Okay. It’s pretty late now, so why don’t you go to sleep? I’ll keep my watch.’

‘You are probably right. I should go to sleep… I’ll bring you some blankets and a pillow and…’

‘I’m fine, just tell me where I can find them and I’ll bring them to myself. You go to sleep now.’

‘Okay… goodnight then.’ You said and went straight to your bathroom to change and then to your bedroom.

Knowing that IN is in the room next to yours gave you some kind of peace of mind. You instantly fell on your bed and went to sleep. You felt secure and safe. 

What you didn’t know was that in fact you shouldn’t have trusted Jeongin that much as you did. The exact moment when you fell asleep IN put his plan in the action. You might not know that, but he’d been stalking you for a while before you met. He knew about you from Chan who might have told him that you live alone. Since IN saw you first he fell into you and his small obsession grew bigger and bigger. He was dreaming about you, your soft body underneath him. He dreamt about all the things he could do to you. 

He put cameras in your house when you weren’t there. The footprints you had seen before were his. He destroyed your alarm so he could freely enter your house whenever he wanted to. And the fun part was that you didn’t have a reason to suspect him at all. He played it well. He stuck to his plan. 

And the plan was simple. He just wanted to make you his no matter what. He was going to do everything to get to you somehow. He had thought about you for such a long time. And finally he had a chance to do so, thanks to Chan who was too careless to even think what he was talking about you and to whom. 

You woke up the next day to the sun’s rays. You looked outside the window. The day was beautiful. Still cold due to the early time and late autumn, but beautiful. You smiled to yourself and got out of bed. You stretched a little and then went to the kitchen, where you’d found IN. You blinked twice, a little surprised. He was making breakfast. 

‘Good morning.’ He smiled widely. ‘How are you feeling Y/N?’ 

‘I’m good, thank you.’ You smiled back. ‘What are you making?’

‘Ah just some french toast and scrambled eggs. I hope you like it.’ 

‘Actually, that’s my favourite.’ You sat at the table. 

‘That’s good.’ He smiled and put food in front of you. ‘Bon appetit my lady.’ He winked. ‘What are you going to do today since it’s your day off?’ 

‘I don’t know… Maybe I will go to the movies?’ You answered and looked at him a little confused. ‘Uhm IN? How do you know that I have a day off?’ 

‘We were talking about it the other day, remember? You've told me that you have a day off today…’ 

‘Really? I don’t remember…’ 

‘Well yeah. You’ve been busy recently, so I guess you must have been too tired to remember that.’ 

‘Yeah, probably you are right…’ You answered back thinking about what he said. You indeed were a little too busy so you could’ve forgotten that you’d told him. ‘Anyway… Do you want to go to the movies with me? If you have time of course…’ 

‘Yes, I’d love to.’ He smiled. ‘And I know what we can even watch. There’s this new horror movie…’ He started talking about the film you wanted to see.

‘Woah, what a coincidence. I was thinking about this movie before…’ You said, a little confused. 

‘You know this saying…  Big brains think the same.’ He said smilingly looking at you. ‘Now get dressed and we can go.’ 

‘Don’t you want to go back to your place and change?’ You asked. 

‘No need to do that. I have some clothes in my backpack.’ 

‘A backpack? When did you bring that?’ You were confused. Yesterday you didn’t even see that he brought with himself something. 

‘Uhm… Yesterday? I came to you with a backpack. Seriously Y/N are you feeling okay?’ He asked, looking at you with worry. ‘I guess you were too scared to notice.’ 

‘Yeah, I guess you are right…Ehm… I'll go get dressed.’ You said and went to your bedroom. At the same time Jeongin cleaned the kitchen and changed into some other clothes. He indeed had a backpack with himself, but he didn’t take it yesterday. He went for his backpack in the morning when you were peacefully sleeping. 

He decided to take you out for a so-called date. He had always been thinking about it. You were one of the prettiest women he’d ever seen. He knew you well even if in person you did meet him a few weeks before. 

‘I’m ready!’ You shouted from your room and came towards him. ‘We can go.’ Your bright smile lightened the whole living room, where IN were waiting. 

‘Good.’ He smiled. ‘You look pretty noona.’ He winked at you. ‘Come, my car is in front of your house.’ 

‘A car? But I don’t remember you coming here by car Innie… When did you have time to…?’ 

‘What? But yesterday when you called me I drove here. Don’t you remember? Maybe the whole situation has a bigger impact on you than we thought?’ He asked, looking at you concerned. Or maybe that's what you had imagined. 

But you had a pretty good memory. And you were certain that IN came to your house without a car or a backpack. You remembered that yesterday night he was breathing quickly because he ran to your place. And he wore only sweatpants and a hoodie. Something was off and you could sense that. 

You looked at him confused. Did the whole situation make you forget some details? Was your mind playing tricks on you? 

‘Are we going?’ He asked, breaking the silence between the two of you. 

‘Hm? Ah yeah… Yeah. We can go.’ You grabbed your jeans jacket and keys and went out of your house. You closed the door. The mark that somebody had left the night before still was there. You started to think what did it mean? Did someone mark your house and will rob you? Or maybe someone will try to harm you? You were completely unaware that the person who did this spent the whole night in your house, with your permission. 

IN opened the door of his car and you sat in the passenger's seat. Then he leaned over you and fastened your seat belt. The strong smell of his cologne hit you hard. He smelled like a mix of cardamom, caramel and amber. It was an intense fragrance but somehow it fitted him perfectly. 

‘Thank you.’ You said to him still fascinated by his scent.

After the movies he took you to the nearby restaurant to eat. You spend a really good time together. He made you forget about the event from the night before. You felt good with his company. You even started to think that it would be nice to become something more with him. Did you perhaps start to grow feelings for him? 

‘Do you want me to stay another night at your place?’ His voice snapped you out of your thoughts. The two of you were already in front of your house. 

‘Nah, I think I’m good today. But thank you Jeonginnie.’ You smiled at him. ‘And thank you for today’s date. It was great fun.’ 

‘My pleasure Y/N.’ He smiled back. ‘But if something happens, call me I’ll come.’ 

‘I will.’ You kissed him on his cheek and went out of his car. He waved to you and waited for you to enter your house. Then he drove back to his place. 

You looked at your reflection in the mirror and smiled widely. The date went well. You felt like finally you found someone who understands you. You thought that it would be really nice to go for another date with IN. He was an interesting young man. 

You took a quick shower and took off your makeup. After all, the day was good, but you felt a little tired. You looked again at your reflection. The tiredness was clearly visible. The past events and a hectic period at your work have left their mark. But even though you were tired you felt very good. 

You were staring at yourself in the mirror when all the lights suddenly went out. You screamed. You hated darkness. Unable to see anything, you started to panic. 

Trying to find some source of light or your phone to lighten up your way, you hit yourself on the leg. You cursed under your breath. Finally you found your phone. Unfortunately the battery was nearly dead. You managed somehow with the lowest percentage of battery to find some candles and light them. Then your phone died completely. 

You were unable to call or even text IN. You put your candles on the coffee table and sat on the couch. A dim light illuminated the entire room. You could see weak shadows dancing on the walls. Then you suddenly heard a noise of footsteps on your porch. 

Your whole body had shivered. You straightened up and looked in the direction where the footsteps were coming from. You decided to stand up and took a pretty heavy vase that was staying on the table as a decor. You were going to hit whoever the person in front of your house was. 

You crept up to the door and were about to open it when suddenly the lights came back on. You looked through the peephole but saw no one on the porch. You put the vase aside and opened the door. Nobody was around. The only thing you could see was a small envelope with your name written on it. You took the envelope and looked inside. Instead of a message you saw a pendrive. 

You were scared and confused at the same time. Didn’t know what to do, you decided to charge your phone and call IN. When your phone was ready to use you quickly tapped at this name and called him. After three signals he had answered. 

‘Hello? Y/Nnie? Are you okay? What happened? Why do you call that late?’ He asked immediately.

‘Innie… can you… can you come here? Please. Someone was at my door and…’ Your voice was trembling. You didn’t realise how scared you were.

‘I’m on my way sweetheart.’ Was the only thing he said before he hung up. 

You were waiting for him to come. After fifteen minutes he was at your place, but you had the impression that at least an hour had passed. He entered your house concerned and looked around. When his eyes spotted your silhouette he quickly came to you and hugged you, seeing your expression. 

You hugged him tight and hid your face in the crook of his neck. He patted your back gently. After a while of hugging both of you moved away from each other. He looked at you with a worry in his eyes.

‘Are you okay sweetheart? Did they hurt you? What happened?’ He asked. 

‘Someone was on my porch. I… I heard some noise after the lights went out. I couldn’t call you earlier because my phone had died. I was so scared, Innie.’ Your voice stuttered. 

‘Shhhh, it’s alright, now I’m here so you don’t need to be afraid.’ He said calmly. 

‘They… they left this.’ You showed him a black pendrive. ‘It was in the envelope laying on my doormat.’

‘Have you tried to open it?’ He asked and took the pendrive from your hand. 

‘No, not yet… I was too afraid.’ You admitted. 

‘It’s okay sweetie. Let’s open it and find out what is on it, all right?’ 

You nodded and gave him your laptop. He gently put the pendrive in and opened the file. Inside it there were plenty of pictures of you. Your half naked body popped out. IN looked at you with great concern. You were too surprised to say anything. 

The last thing that was in the file was a short video of you sleeping on the bed. You were shocked.  Some pervert had pictures and even the whole video of you. He must have had hidden cameras all around your house. You looked at IN frightened. 

‘Wha-What should I do now?’ You asked quietly. ‘Innie, somebody has my pictures, why?’ 

‘Well, I don’t know Y/N. Maybe you should think of going somewhere else? You can come to my place if you want to.’ He proposed. 

‘But… I need to find those cameras. There is a pervert who has my pics!’ You raised your voice and started to panic. 

‘Y/N, sweetheart, calm down please. Let’s go find those cameras first, then we decide what to do, okay?’ He asked. 

‘Yes, okay.’ You agreed. The both of you started looking for some hidden cameras but you couldn’t find them. You sat at the bed and sighed heavily. You looked up at him, and asked. ‘How is it even possible that we have searched everywhere and we didn’t find anything? There is footage. Some pervert did have my pics. Why didn't we find any camera here?’ 

‘I don’t know Y/N. Maybe he took those pics earlier and took cameras when you weren’t home?’ 

‘I don’t know… maybe… or… INnie? What if he was here when I was sleeping and…’ The panic in your voice couldn’t let you finish the sentence. Suddenly your body started trembling. Your breath was sharp and quick. You felt like you couldn’t breathe. You look at IN, the panic was growing rapidly. ‘IN… I… I-I can’t….’ You couldn’t say anything. The panic attack began to intensify. 

In that exact moment IN kept his cool. He looked at you and before you could blink he kissed you. His action made you calm down. You were surprised yet you calmed fully down. 

You didn’t want to stop kissing him. His lips were plump and soft. Slow sloppy kisses started to be more and more intense. His method worked though. Your panic attack just has been gone. After a while you pulled away from each other. You looked at him blushing. 

‘T-thank you…’ You shyly said and your voice trembled. 

‘You are mostly welcome, Y/Nnnie.’ He smiled widely. ‘You good now?’ 

‘Yes, yes, I’m all right. Thank you. You just saved me.’ You looked at him and smiled a little. 

‘Do you want me to stay for another night?’ 

‘Actually yes. I will feel safer.’ You nodded. ‘Could you… I mean, if you want to… Do you want to cuddle? Tomorrow I will go to the police station…’ 

‘I agree… Come, take a rest.’ 

You both went to your bedroom and lied down on the bed. He wrapped his arms around your waist and cuddled you tight. You fell asleep in his arms. The next morning you woke up all alone. Sheets next to you were empty and cold. He must have gone early in the morning. 

You sighed. It would be nice to wake up with him next to you. You stood up from your bed and went straight to the bathroom to wash your face and teeth. You had decided last night that you had to go to the police to show them that somebody was secretly filming you. You didn’t feel safe in your own home. 

You dressed up and grabbed all the things you needed. Expect the pendrive. It was gone and you couldn’t find it anywhere. You started to panic. The pendrive was nowhere to be seen, but you could swear that you’d left it on the nightstand. You quickly grabbed your cell phone and texted IN, maybe he took it? 

You: Hey Innie… Have you seen the pendrive? I cannot find it anywhere. 

You sent the message but he didn’t reply. It was weird. Usually he answered back as soon as he got the message. You’ve decided to wait for a while. But the time had passed, and there was still no reply from him. You started to worry. A lot of what ifs… questions formed in your head. 

Finally you decided to leave your house.  You couldn’t wait any longer for his reply. With a pendrive or not, you still had to report what had happened the past few days. On the outside you saw some people. Your next door neighbour, Chan, finally came back from his holiday. 

‘Hi Chan. Long time no see.’ You greeted him coming to his fence. 

‘Oh, hi Y/N.’ He smiled as usual. ‘How have you been?’ 

‘I was good, a lot had happened though. Anyway, how was your holiday?’ You asked. He looked more relaxed and also more tan than before. 

‘It was great visiting Australia and my family for a while. But it is also great to come back home. Something new has happened?’ He asked, looking at you with curiosity in his eyes. 

‘Actually a lot of things… I met this guy, IN, he said that you know him. He is so sweet…’ 

‘Wait, what? You met IN?’ He didn’t let you finish the sentence. ‘But I’m not friends with him. Actually I don’t know him well. Jisung had told me that he’s weird and a creepy man.’ 

‘What do you mean?’ You asked nervously. 

‘Y/N, Yang Jeongin, if we are talking about him, is not a good person. He went to the same school as Jisung and Changbin. Jisung told me that he’d stalked multiple girls in the past and had been arrested a few times. Tell me what had happened during my absence.’

You were confused. IN who you knew was a sweet guy who helped you a lot. He replaced Chan’s place for a while. Of course Chan was only your friend and next door neighbour but IN was someone more. Something was definitely off. You told Chan about all the events that had happened when he wasn’t around. Chan seemed to be more concerned than before. 

‘Y/N you should have gone to the police as soon as the first event had happened.’ He finally said. ‘It seems like everything had happened when you were here all alone and when he suddenly appeared. For me it’s kinda suspicious, don’t you think?’ 

‘Well… I’m confused now Chan.’ You said. ‘Do you think that everything that had happened was his idea?’ 

‘I don’t know Y/N, but I think it cannot be a coincidence. Do you want to go to the police station and tell them about what you said to me? I can drive…’ 

‘I wanted to do it anyway…’ You admitted. You and Chan went to his car when suddenly IN’s posture appeared. He looked at you and then at Chan. His expression wasn’t as friendly as you were used to. 

‘Hello Y/N… Who is he?’ He asked and it hit you suddenly. 

Jeongin said that he and Chan were friends. He also said that Chan had told him about you. And you believed him. Till that moment. You were standing next to Chan, and IN didn’t seem to recognise him. If they were friends, he wouldn't have asked. But they weren’t friends. They weren’t even close. 

Chan was right. Everything had happened when Jeongin appeared. You were all alone, Chan was abroad and IN was suddenly in your area. You didn’t think about that earlier, but when you first met him, he knew too much about you. And also he lied about knowing Chan and jogging with him. You knew Chan well, he didn’t like jogging at all. You should have noticed this lie from the start. 

But you didn’t. So now you were more than certain that IN was in fact the person by whom you couldn't sleep peacefully at night. His recent behaviour was suspicious. Deep down you knew that something was off about him. But you also fell into him a little so you couldn’t notice all the things. 

You didn’t know what to do. You looked at Chan and then you moved your sight to IN. Both men were staring at each other. Chan clenched his fists. He was ready to fight if there was a need. You looked into IN’s eyes and asked. 

‘It was you, right? You are the one who left that mark on my door and left footsteps on my porch. You sent the envelope and had pics of me…’ 

‘Well, you shouldn’t know that, but yes.’ He admitted and smiled at you. There was something in his smile. It wasn’t kind. It was creepy. 

‘B-but why? Why did you do that IN?’ You stuttered. 

‘Simply, sweetheart.’ He said smiling and tilting his head to the side. His foxy eyes were piercing you. ‘Because I’m obsessed with you.’

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

masterlist

[butididntpourthewhiskeys]

D O P A M I N E

Chapter III

🎧: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQeBFjbo4KQ

She sits there, sandwiched between her family, right around the big round table in the middle of the cozy living room. Her uncle Andrew tells everyone about their recent vacation to Hawaii, and in the corner of her eye, Taylor can see her mother nodding at everything she hears with a smile. She’s in desperate need of a beach holiday. And so is Taylor. While unlocking her phone, she makes the mental note to plan a nice getaway with Matty and her family. After the past six months of this little human disrupting life as they knew it before, a tropical holiday is definitely needed. Taylor checks her phone screen for the tenth time in the past thirty minutes. She swallows once, then carefully opens the baby monitoring app again. The little boy in the big bed upstairs seems to have turned his head to the other side a few minutes ago. Aside from that, he’s still peacefully sleeping in the big bed that’s theirs for the night. Taylor doesn’t even know why she’s so anxious all of the sudden, but she has to stop herself from not running upstairs and just grabbing the little body and holding it close to her. Maybe it’s because this is the first time that her baby is sleeping in a house that’s not hers. They have security with them, and made sure the house is as safe as possible. Still, she worries. As always when it comes to this little human being.

"Are you okay, honey?" she hears her mother's voice close to her ear, pulling her out of her thoughts. Of course, her mother would notice her staring at the sleeping baby on her screen. Taylor nods quickly, but Andrea can see from her face that she's not fully herself tonight. She knows that Taylor's been a lot more irritable since becoming a mother. But still, she notices that Taylor's drifting away in her thoughts quite a lot tonight. A sense of uneasiness that she's lacking this weekend.

"Yeah, I'm just... it's weird that he's sleeping in that room all by himself, so... far away from me. I just... I think I'm going crazy," she says, almost laughing at herself while placing the phone on the table in front of her. She knows her phone will go off the second there's any movement or crying in the room upstairs. Time to put the phone down for a second. She looks back at her mother, who gives her a warm smile. She's been there too, it seems.

"Have some dessert, and your mama hormones will calm down." Andrea laughs at her daughter and moves the little plate filled with Alison's world-famous pumpkin pie into Taylor's direction. Taylor smiles, and a "thank you" rolls off her lips. Of course, her mom still offers her to eat the dessert first. Just one of the many kind gestures she's always known from the warmth of her mom.

"Where's Matty? His special order of pumpkin pie with vanilla ice cream is coming right up and will be melting soon," she hears Alison's voice yelling from the kitchen. Suddenly, she feels all these uncomfortable stares on her. She swallows a bit, unsure how to react. In fact, all she's been trying to do in the past few minutes was to distract herself from the fact that she knows he's struggling yet he prefers to be alone rather than talk to her. She doesn't want to seem uncomfortable, doesn't want anyone around this table to suspect that something is going on. She clears her throat, then slowly gets up.

“Uhm, I think he.. he got a work call a few minutes go.” she says, a little fake smile escaping her lips hoping that her story makes sense. Because the truth is, she doesn’t know where he is. She doesn’t know where he went to blow off some steam in this house.

“Okay honey, can you tell him to come sit back down? If not there will only be melted ice cream.” Alison replies and Taylor nods, slowly leaving the living room off to find him for a second time tonight. 

__________________

<Where are you? Please tell me you’re okay>

<Shit, I should’ve texted you. Sorry. Just wanted to get away for a few minutes. Want to come join me?>

<Where on earth are you?>

<Don’t laugh, okay?>

<Tell me now. Or I’m sending Brandon on a search warrant! Yes this is a threat>

Taylor stares at her phone, suddenly receives a shared location from him. She clicks on the pop up message, can see on the little red dot that he’s less than 10 mins walking distance away from the house. She zooms in. What on earth is he doing? Running away from her family’s thanksgiving dinner just to blow off some steam? She can’t believe him sometimes. As much as she loves sharing her life with him, and the fact that he will forever keep things interesting and exciting, she sometimes wishes she could look into his soul. See the things like he sees them. Understand his fast, intelligent and chaotic mind that she loves so deeply. 

Taylor has to laugh quietly while standing in the hallway, staring at the lid up display of her phone. He must have walked to a gas station? 

<Don’t tell me you’re hiding at a 7 Eleven from me.>

It takes less than two seconds and he sends her a picture as a reply. She can’t help but giggle. He’s just sent her a selfie of himself inside of what seems like a Starbucks. The background is lid up, and he’s holding up a coffee cup with the dark green coffee logo. She can’t believe him sometimes. But she also knows he needs his space whenever he’s not well. She’s learned that in the past 15 years of knowing him. She’s learned that while supporting him in his therapy. It’s his way of carving out space to find new mechanisms to not indulge himself in substances. And she’s glad he’s been able to find ways to deal with it. Healthy ways. Non-destructive ways. Even if that means he wants to be sitting at a random coffee shop all alone to clear his thoughts in the middle of the night. 

<It’s actually a Walmart. Come join me. Not a single soul here.>

She can’t help but laugh once more, wants to reply but then hesitates. She can’t believe he’s sitting inside a Walmart. On Thanksgiving. This weirdo. Taylor checks the time on her phone. 10.25pm. Of course no one else is shopping at Walmart at this hour. She looks up again, takes a deep breath. Time to live a little?

<I’ll get a hot chocolate with caramel syrup and whip cream. There in 10 minutes.>

__________________

“Where are we going exactly?” Brandon asks, takes a look at Taylor through the review mirror of the big range rover. She can tell that the strongly built man is confused to drive her around, all by herself, on Thanksgiving eve in this tiny town. She reaches for her seatbelt, has to giggle a bit about herself. She’s glad she reached for her navy wool coat. It really is cold outside. 

“So apparently my husband decided to spend the rest of the evening at Walmart. It’s like.. five minutes from here, I think.” she says, already leaning forward to share the location he just sent with him. Brandon takes a look at the map, then slowly starts driving. Taylor leans back, takes a deep breath. As weird as this situation is, she has to admit that she craves to get away for just a bit too. She can’t remember the last time she was at a Walmart? It must have been at least fifteen years ago. 

Taylor checks her phone again. Thank god her mother promised to go upstairs, and check on Marly. She’s so lucky to know that her baby is always in the best possible hands whenever her parents are around. 

“I think we’re already there, miss.” Brandon says after what feels like a minute of driving. The big car pulls up and drives through the big empty parking lot. It’s not a normal parking lot though. This one is massive. Right next to the gas station she could see on Google maps earlier, she can now also see the huge Walmart. This really is Texas. 

“I’ll be right behind.” Brandon says as he parks the car right in the first parking spot near the entrance. 

“Sounds good. I think there’s not many people in there at this hour anyways.” she says, leaves the car with the big man right behind her. He gives her some space, never walks right besides her to at least make her feel like she’s not under surveillance when she’s in private. Taylor enters the big department store, can already see the big Starbucks logo on left hand side. This store really is huge. The smell of plastic and cleaning products reminds her of past days. When she was younger, she would love to go shopping at Target or any of these department stores on the weekends. Getting a large Starbucks drink and roaming the stores with her mom. Memories of her life, back then, when she was just a normal person running errands like everyone else in this country. Without paparazzi hunts or fans building groups around her. 

With the white wool beanie on her head that she got last week, Taylor slowly walks across the sterile shiny floors. The radio is running in the background. Only one cashier is busy. It really seems like no one else had the idea of going shopping here on Thanksgiving eve. Not a single soul looking at her weirdly. No screaming. No nervous laughters. A nice feeling of normalcy on her chest for once. Even though there’s nothing normal about being at Walmart at 11pm on Thanksgiving eve. 

After a few more steps, Taylor can see the big Starbucks counter, filled with lots of sweets. The girl behind the counter smiles at her. It’s a confused, nervous and insecure smile. She knows exactly what thought process she just went through. From confusion, to denial, to nervousness. It’s really true that no one would probably expect her in a Walmart in a small town in Texas on Thanksgiving. Taylor just smiles kindly at her, hoping deeply that she won’t take out her phone and film her the next second. Just when she looks away again is when she can see the familiar man sitting on a chair on one of the small tables by the window, right in the corner. He turns his head to look at her, and the smile she’s met with almost still makes her knees go weak. She doesn’t say anything, just slowly opens the buttons of her winter coat and sits down across him. He still smiles, a little laugh escaping his lips as he carefully moves the warm cup closer to her. Her hands are being warmed in an instant. 

“Nice to meet you, you look just like your pictures.” he says with a smirk. Taylor wants nothing more than to stay serious, but she can’t help escape a little laugh too. She takes a first sip from the comforting hot drink in her hand, closes her eyes relishing the sweetness. She just loves chocolate. As well as whip cream. All of the things she so happily indulges in since she’s pregnant. 

“I actually like meeting strangers at Walmart in the middle of the night. It’s just a normal thing I do, you know? When my husband is busy with work.” she replies, and it makes him laugh. Matty just can’t stop staring at her. All these dark thoughts on his mind, that almost seemed to kill him from the inside a few minutes ago seem to have vanished. Now that he can look into her face again. Now that she sits there in front of him at Walmart with her blue eyes and short nails, the little eye bags and her bangs that are ever so messed up since taking off her beanie. It’s been ages since he experienced her in an environment as mundane as the four walls of a department store chain. He’s always loved reality with her, more than anything else they do. Because both of them are very much aware that the majority of their lives happens in a non-reality like universe. A beautiful, privileged bubble that not many get to experience. A bubble, that the both of them almost never get to leave. 

But not tonight.

“Thanks for joining me, my love.” he says then, his voice suddenly on a level of gentleness that it hasn’t been before. She can feel him reaching with his hand for hers. He still looks at her, hasn’t stopped looking at her face since the second she walked in tonight, a little laugh escaping his mouth as she puts her drink down. A mustache of whip cream is covering her upper lip. 

“Can I kiss you?” he says then.

“Not here.” 

“Baby, there’s no one here.”

“Okay, but..” 

In that second, Matty has already leaned across the table, stolen two gentle kisses from her lips. When he sits down again is when she can see him licking his lips, clearly enjoying the taste of her caramel whip cream. She suddenly realizes, carefully reaches for her upper lip to check if she’s got any more whip cream stuck on there. 

“You could’ve just told me, you know.” 

“Nah, this was more fun.” he says, doesn’t let go off her hand, just leans back in his chair and takes a sip from his coffee. 

Silence comes over them. The radio in the background is playing an old Justin Timberlake tune. Matty just sits there, staring at the blonde woman in front of him. She doesn’t say anything either, just gives him this one look he knows too well. 

“So?” 

“So what?” 

She sighs, her hand definitely not letting go off his right now. 

“What are we doing at Walmart instead of being at Alison’s house at this time? Where my entire family is at? Where our baby is fast asleep…” 

Matty doesn’t reply. He just sighs, takes a look outside of the window. It’s pitch black outside. There’s a huge digital banner at the end of the big parking lot that switches from advertising an insurance company to a bunch of fruit displayed. A local fruit shop. They really are in the middle of nowhere.

Matty can feel her squeeze his hand gently, taking him right back to reality. He takes a deep breath, looks back at the familiar face across him. 

“I just wanted to get away for a bit. Just went for a walk and decided to get a coffee. Then you texted, and I couldn’t think of anything better than to get away for a bit with you instead of just being by myself.” 

Taylor feels her heart growing, swallows for a second. She’s never been more thankful for any explanation he’s ever given her before. He’s being honest, and it fills her heart to know that he still chooses her. That he still wants to spend time with her. Still looks at her with the same amount of gratitude and love as he did back then. 

“It’s been a while since we went on a date just you and me.” she replies then with a little smile on her lips, and Matty laughs quietly. 

“Is this a date?” 

“You bought me a drink and we’re sitting around a table that’s not ours, in public.” 

She convinced him. He adjusts himself a bit, then sits upright again. Both his elbows on the table, his head hunched forward to be able to speak with her a bit closer.

“I was thinking a bit, clearing my thoughts while walking here, and I.. I just want to apologise to you.” he says then, a bit more serious than he was a minute ago. Taylor still hasn’t let go off his hand, just sits there across from him in her coat. A slight smile on her lips. She places her cup in front of her to have both hands free. Both hands free to wrap around his hand. To hold onto his hand as tight as she wants to. For the rest of her life. 

“My head’s been everywhere this week. I just.. I feel ashamed sometimes when I get confronted with that aspect of my past. Especially when I’m around your family. Because it becomes even more obvious to me then, that you deserve so much better. And all I can..”

“Will you shut up?” she interrupts him. She can’t believe he says this. If only he knew how much better he is than any other man in her life before. 

“I’m just being honest. You know. Sharing my feelings with you.” 

She sighs. His eyes are fully focused on his hand now, and especially on the way her small hands are caressing his. She’s so gentle. She’s so full of love. He can’t believe she decided to get married to him. He can’t believe she’s his. After all these years. 

“Matty.” she says in a soft voice, not demanding, not mad or as passionate as she was before. He looks back up into her eyes. A moment of calmness overcoming him. “I love you. You’re the best person for me. Stop these thoughts please. Nothing about your past will change what we have now. I was there back then, remember? I’ve seen you at your worst and I’ve seen you today. And I’m so proud of you. And I’m so… in love with you. Stop these thoughts, my love. Promise me.”

He lets her words sink, and just nods. She’s right. The more he lets her words sink in, the more he realizes that this train of thoughts was caused once again by his anxiety. By his anxiety that always comes up when thinking about Trevor. About Trevor’s laugh, and the warmth of his family. The smell in his nose whenever he walked into his parents house hallway. The very first day they met at school back in Manchester when he was just a kid. The very first day he showed him how to find the right vein, for the right shot. The right shot of clear crystals in his blood stream. The right shot to take his life away. 

He swallows. 

“I love you, too.” he just says quietly, a whisper more than anything else. He knows so well that this is the only way to ease his pain. 

Her love. The cure for everything else these past years. She looks at him, her left hand caressing his stubbly cheek for a moment.

“Also, I don’t want you to apologise. I’m glad you share with me whenever you’re not feeling great. That’s what I’m here for.” she smiles at him. He can tell that she’s so much happier than she was an hour ago. He can tell how happy she is that he’s let her in. And Matty nods, manages to fake a smile as well. 

“You’re unreal.” he just sighs, moving her hand closer to his mouth. He’s ready to leave these dark thoughts behind. Just for tonight. He gently kisses the back of her hand. 

“Thanks for coming on a date to Walmart with me. Brings up some memories for me actually.” 

She giggles, takes one more sip from her cup and just looks at him with a smile.

“Here, have you tried this? It’s so good. The whip cream with the caramel drizzle.. might be my new pregnancy craving.” 

She’s already shoved her drink into his hand, and Matty takes a sip. His face looks disgusted all of the sudden. He looks back at the cup, opens the lid for a second to reassure himself that she’s not drinking poison, then looks back at her. She already has to giggle at his face. He looks as disgusted as back then when she made him try the celery juice she always drinks while being on tour. 

���Your taste buds are broken, my love.” 

“Shush.” she laughs, rolls her eyes and enjoys the warm drink herself again. Matty laughs at her jugging down the sweet drink. He has no idea how she can drink the whole thing without feeling sick. It’s sweet. More than sweet. A sugar rush that will make her shaky in a bit, that’s for sure.

“How are you feeling? How’s little bean doing in there?” 

She has to smile at his words. She loves whenever he calls the baby in her belly ‘little bean’. When she was pregnant with Marly, he would always call the embryo in her stomach ‘tiny bug’. It’s his way of loving whatever is growing in her stomach even before having met the baby. She smiles. 

“Little bean is good. I’ve been feeling pretty good, just a bit tired. I can’t believe I’m not nauseous this time around, but let’s not jinx it. Maybe keeping busy really is the secret to not feeling pregnant. Like, I’m too busy with Marles than to feel tired or sick. It’s actually amazing.” 

He carefully listens to her talking, his chin resting on his left hand. He smiles. With every word, he feels like realizing more and more that there will be another soul living with them soon. Another bundle of love, that will absolutely turn their lives around. Again. Making humans with her was something he always wanted, but never dared to actually do. Until there was that second pink line on this test. Out of nowhere. Unplanned but oh, so so wanted. 

“You’re superwoman, you know that?”

Taylor has to laugh at him. 

“Stop it. You’re weird tonight.” 

“When have I not been weird.” he replies in a thick accent. But she knows. She knows he’s extra clingy these days. He looks at her with a certain level of gratitude these days. She loves seeing the love in his eyes these days, that is extra strong at the minute. But at the same time, she knows he suffers. She knows he suffers, and their connection is his only cure right now. 

“You know what I think?” 

He looks at her in expectation, his coffee cup already empty. 

“I think we should go shopping now before heading home. Haven’t been to Walmart in ages. Let’s get some candy, and some slippers. Maybe they have some cute stuff for the cats. Their pet section was always amazing.”

Matty pretends to be annoyed. But she knows he loves this, can’t hide a smile from her. She gets up, reaches for his hand and pulls him up as well. He sighs, wraps his arm in the big old leather jacket around her shoulder. He presses a kiss onto the fabric of her beanie and lets her drag him into the first isle of the big store.

__________________

“Here, what about this one? I think this one will absolutely make sure your tree will go up in flames..” he mumbles, holding up a box of fairy lights shaped like Santa Claus. He can already hear her giggling, a few meters away. In her high heels and her short hair in a beanie, she just gets back to him. Her red lips forming a smile. 

“Nah, I have a color theme. Remember? I said green, gold and burgundy.” 

“Oh, I’m sorry. How could I forget.” he says with his big curls, making her giggle again. 

“Give me that.” he mumbles now, reaching for the shopping basket in her hands. She doesn’t really react, doesn’t want to show him how appreciative she is of this little gesture. She knows that he would hate to admit it. But he does have a soft side to him. It always jumps out whenever he’s trying to hide it away the most. 

“Okay, so we got… fairy lights, napkins, candles…” she mumbles to herself, looking at the shopping list in her phone.

“Mental breakdowns…” he adds to her list, making her giggle again. He loves whenever that happens. 

“I think we’ve got it all, actually.” she says proudly. Matty nods, the christmas playlist playing in this Walmart making him sick to his stomach. But maybe it’s not the background music. Maybe it’s the fact that he knows that having gotten everything that was on her shopping list will mean that they’ll be done soon. That his chance has passed. 

Taylor starts looking around, almost as if she’s trying to find her way back to the check out section. And he’s not having any of it. Maybe, it’s time to be bold. 

“Hey, I think we forgot something…”

“Really? Wh…”

The second she feels his lips on hers, is the second her brain starts to melt. She didn’t expect him to be this gentle. She didn’t expect him to do this, right here, right now, right in the middle of the Christmas section. 

He slowly pulls back, his hand still gently on her cheek. She swallows once, almost seems out of breath. 

“Sorry, I just.. I had to..” 

“It’s okay. It’s.. you’re allowed to do that.” she starts mumbling, and it makes her laugh. He loves making her feel this way. 

As they stand there, caught in the moment of their very first kiss, two pounding hearts and the smell of smoke in her nose, the bustling sounds of Christmas shoppers in the isle right next to them seems to fade into the background. The world is on pause, as if granting them a private moment amidst the chaos of this time a year.

Taylor looks into Matty's eyes, her heart racing with a mix of excitement and uncertainty. She brushes her fingers through his curly hair for a second. His cheeks flush with a mix of nerves and exhilaration, realizing he has taken a leap of faith for once. They both sense the electricity between them, a magnetic force drawing them closer. Suddenly, nothing really matters. With a shy smile, Taylor leans in for a second kiss, deepening the connection for a moment. Time slows down as they lose themselves in the soft touch of their lips, savoring each moment of this unexpected intimacy. Savoring each moment of her becoming bold suddenly, her hands still securely on his cheek.

As they make their way to the checkout a few seconds later, the atmosphere seems to have changed. The aisles that once felt ordinary and mundane now brim with a sense of magic and possibility. The Christmas lights twinkle with renewed brightness, mirroring the sparks that ignited between them.

__________________

Taylor opens her eyes. The first thing she sees is his face. She closes her eyes again for a second, stirs once more before opening her eyes up a second time. Morning light is flooding the room. He smiles at her from his side of the bed. His hair as messy as mostly when he’s just woken up. Grey brown curls in all directions. A very active, very happy baby on his back right between them. His father’s protective hand on the small belly. Marly is stretching his legs out, a cooing noise escaping his mouth while his tiny fist almost punch his mom’s face. Taylor rubs her eyes then. She loves to find Matty’s hand gently caressing the baby’s stomach. It seems her boys have spent the morning waking up without her. 

“Morning, my love.” he smiles at her. His hand leaves his son for once, and lands gently on her soft cheek. She knows her hair must be messed up and in all directions. But the way he looks at her makes her feel at her best again. The most gentle smile. He loves her. She feels it in every ounce of this moment. 

“Morning.” she murmurs, the side of her head still in the big pillow of Alison’s guest room. Her hand now on the baby’s cheek, kissing the bald head good morning. 

“Gimme a kiss.” she hears the sleepy man next to her whisper, feels him come closer and then enjoys every second of peace in her while he just casually gives her a gentle good morning kiss, leaning over the baby between them. 

“You guys are up already?” she says with sleep in her voice, and Matty laughs quietly. He seems to be in a much better mood than last night. She loves it. She loves the inner peace it brings her. 

“I woke up to someone sucking my nose, as if it was a boob.”

Taylor has to laugh instantly. This has happened already a while ago and it was a picture for the gods. Marly sometimes mistakes fingers or noses or other objects that are suckable for the place where he gets his food. A good indicator that someone’s ready for breakfast. 

“It happened again?” she laughs, already sitting up a bit to steal her baby a big kiss on the chubby cheek. Matty just remains still, leaning with his back against the bed frame, and nods. He loves watching her right now. He loves how much sleep there is in her eyes. He loves how gently she just sits up, wearing one of his old 1975 shirts that’s way too big on her. How she leans down to her baby, stealing the happy baby what feels like a dozen kisses. Marly starts giggling, wiggling his legs in excitement. He can’t help but laugh, too. These are these moments. These moments that will change his heart forever. 

“You’re so funny… you are so funny, you know that?” she whispers in a high pitched voice at their son, and Matty has to laugh as much as Marly does. Taylor notices Matty’s smile as she reaches for her baby, places him securely in her arms. She moves around in bed until she finds a comfortable seating position, leaning against Matty’s torso, sitting upright in bed. Her naked feet securely tucked into the warm bed sheets from before. She casually lets herself fall against him, loves feeling his arms wander around her already. One hand on her thigh, and the other one stroking her long blonde hair away from her neck, so that he can kiss the spot gently while she starts freeing her left boob, adjusting her baby right underneath her. The little boy needs less than five seconds to latch onto her, and starts chugging down his breakfast. Both Taylor and Matty have to laugh at him. He seems to be extra voracious today, loud swallowing noises coming from the little mouth. 

“He’s got the thirst from his father.” 

Taylor turns her head, gives him an annoyed but amused stare. 

“Come here.” he mumbles then, helps her lean back an inch to be fully cuddled into his arms. He lowers his head to kiss her shoulder once, then looks at his baby just like she does. An unreal feeling to see these beautiful green eyes staring back at them. A one in a billion chance to ever be able to look into his son’s eyes. One in a billion and he still shares this moment with these two humans. Matty’s right hand wanders to her stomach. She welcomes the gesture, moves her head to his face then. She looks at him with puffy eyes and smiles, doesn’t need to say anything else. He can’t wait to meet their second angel. 

And neither can she. 

__________________

“Alright, do we have everyone on board?” Alison yells, while standing in the door frame. Half of the Finchley’s are out of the door already, whilst the other half is still getting dressed for the cold. Ready for a true autumnal walk through Kingwood park. One of the most beautiful areas to be at during winter. The leaves are still colorful, the trees not too empty and naked as they are in almost any other part of the country now. It was Taylor’s idea. One of the things she always tries to do, now that she’s a mother. She wants her son to experience seasons. She wants him to leave the house, not just grow up in between four protective walls. She knows that the risk of someone taking a picture is there. But she’s doing the most to enable him to grow up normally. Seeing colorful leaves on the ground. The fresh air of autumn. Her favorite season. 

“Andrew, Scott, Austin, Maureen, Jackson - you can take the first car. We’ll take the bigger one with the baby.” she already organises the big group to get going. Taylor has got Marly on her arm already. A small bag wrapped around her torso, her favorite green scarf wrapped around her throat. But she’s not the only one dressed ready for the cold. The little boy on her arms is packed up in a warm winter jacket. The tiny beanie with cat ears is covering his bald little head. He looks so cute, isn’t even crying at all. He just looks around all fascinated by everyone gathering outside and jumping into one of the cars one on one. 

Matty is still busy unbuckling the baby shell from the portable stroller they brought. He’s just getting a look from Alison, and has to laugh as well. He’s got two diaper bags around his shoulder as well as the maxi cosi in his hand now. 

“Are you guys sure you’ll need all this for an hour of a walk..” 

“She’s the boss.” Matty just replies, making Alison laugh as he already disappears by the car to store the bags securely in the back. Taylor just looks at Matty and rolls her eyes. 

“I don’t know if we’ll need all this but I just want to make sure we have everything in case.”

Alison laughs at her niece, closes the door behind her. She knows what it means to be a mother for the first time. It comes with a lot of anxiety and uncertainty. Always wanting to do the right thing. 

“That’s fine. Let’s get going, darling.” she says. Andrea and her aunt Marjorie’s husband Greg both get into the car. Matty signals Taylor to hand Marly to him. 

“Get in and I’ll give him to you when you sit.” 

Taylor hands him the little boy, then slowly makes her way into the mini van. She sits down right behind the driver, facing the little baby’s car seat next to Andrea and Matty. She reaches for the little boy and places him gently in the car seat. Andrea immediately helps her to buckle him up securely while Matty gets into the car himself. Unbelievable how much effort it is these days to go for a walk somewhere. 

“Are you sure you want to sit this way, honey? Do you get car sick?” Alison asks but Taylor shakes her head, already fastening the seat belt herself. 

“No, if I sit this way I can have an eye on him.” she says, and everyone nods. The car starts driving and Matty opens the hood of the little grey maxi cosi a bit more. Marly looks up at him, then back at Taylor who’s sitting right in front of him. He looks confused, doesn’t really understand where they’re going. 

“Where are they dragging you now, huh” Matty jokes, making everyone in the car laugh a bit. Andrea starts talking about the last time she visited Kingwood park. Taylor watches Marly’s eyes getting smaller and smaller. But what makes her feel warm inside is the fact that he’s holding onto Matty’s big finger for the entire drive. It melts her heart how much they love each other. Taylor looks out of the window. She loves driving through new cities, seeing people walk on the pavement and just live their day to day lives. She listens to the conversations of everyone, slowly closes her eyes for a second. 

She opens her eyes for a second time today, realizes she’s still sitting in the car, and they’re still driving to Kingwood park, at the very Northern end of the city. Alison told her that the ride would be a little less than an hour, but she didn’t expect the drive to take them around oh so many curves and bumps here in nature. She turns her head to the front, finds Marly still fast asleep in his baby shell. Matty smiles at her, still in the midst of a conversation with her mother. She looks outside again. The scarf around her neck making her feel like she can’t properly breath. She swallows once, feels this exhaustion in her legs again. It’s weird. She’s used to feeling tired, but this is a next level tiredness. She takes a deep breath. If there’s one more bump on the road, she might actually get sick. With her hand, she just holds on tightly to the scarf on her lap. This can’t be happening. She can’t be getting sick now. Taylor looks outside of the window, taking a deep breath. Of course she can feel that Matty feels that something is up. He’s still listening to the conversations in the car, but reaches for her hand now. Just when she touches him is when he looks at her a bit more worries than before. Her hand is cold and sweaty. She’s shaking. 

“You okay?” he says then, and everyone suddenly stares at her. She would’ve loved if he hadn’t said anything. But maybe, it was the right call. 

“I don’t.. I just feel really dizzy and..” 

“Mate, can we please stop the car for a second?” Matty already yells at the driver, who stops the car at the sideway of the road. Taylor just brushes her bangs out of her forehead with her free hand, the shaking of her fingers being visible to everyone now. 

“Honey, what’s going on?” Andrea says now, can clearly see that her daughter is as pale as a white wall. She holds one hand in front of her mouth, as Matty already opens the door, helps Taylor to step outside for a second. 

She just stands there, taking deep breaths. Her entire body in her wool coat is shaking. Matty’s arms wrapped around her from the side. 

“You okay?” he whispers, she just shakes her head. 

“I just.. I’m so sorry. I just got so dizzy and… nauseous.” she mumbles, and he can still tell that she’s shaking. Her hands that hold onto him are cold, sweaty and shaking more than he likes to see.

“Come here, sit down for a second.” he says, walking with her to the pit of the highway and helps her sit down for a second. She needs fresh air right now. 

“Do you.. do you need to..?” 

She doesn’t say anything, just shrugs her shoulders. If she wasn’t feeling so dizzy, she would definitely be more than embarrassed now. Her family, including the driver are just witnessing her having a pregnant breakdown in the car. If she actually throws up on the side of the road now, they will officially think she’s lost it. She just covers her eyes, taking deep breaths. She can’t throw up now. She can’t throw up now.

“Do you have some water?” she then hears Matty asking everyone in the car. It takes less than a second and Andrea gets off the car as well, handling him a bottle of still water. Matty takes two steps closer to her, sits down in front of her and opens the cap, handing her the plastic bottle instantly. 

“Honey, is this from driving backwards? You never had problems with that, did you?” Andrea just looks at Taylor in worry.

“I.. I don’t know. I just got super shaky and sick suddenly. Was weird.” she mumbles then, sipping on her water bottle, praying that her mother won’t get the obvious. It’s true that she never suffered from motion sickness. She never does. Unless she’s pregnant, apparently. 

“I’m so sorry guys.” she says, still shaky and pale. She just sits there, in the middle of nowhere, next to the big car, praying that she won’t throw up in front of everyone. Matty knees in front of her. Of course, he’s worries. She can see it in his face. He takes the water bottle from her, then reaches for her ice cold and sweaty hands again. He looks at her, wants to reassure himself that she’s okay. 

“Stop apologising. Want a snickers bar? To get your blood sugar up again? We can also drive back and get some rest.” 

She shakes her head. Just the thought of food could result in her vomiting right here, right now. 

“No, I.. I just need a few minutes. Fresh air is good.” she says, just sits there. Everything is still turning. Little stars in the corner of her eyes. She hates whenever this happens. It happened only twice in her life. Once when she was sixteen and had a bad sun burn, and once last year. Being pregnant and not having eaten enough. 

Matty sits down next to her, his arm around her making sure she’s supported and comfortable. 

“No rush, baby. Take your time. Drink this.” he says, handing her the water bottle again. She looks back at him, then nods. Thank god she’s got the most caring person by her side, as always. She takes a deep breath of fresh air, feels herself slowly coming back to her senses as her mother’s eyes meet hers. She knows. Taylor should’ve known that she knows. Andrea just smiles, having figured out in Taylor’s face that she understood and then slowly gets back into the car. 

It takes less than five minutes, another desperate try of Matty to get her to take a bite from the snickers bar he found in the car door until Taylor gets up and feels ready to get into the car again. But this time, she’s taking Matty’s seat. He insists. As she sits back down on the warm cushion, she can feel everyone’s worried looks on her. 

Uncomfortable. More than uncomfortable. 

“I’m good. I promise.” she says, a smile on her face again. She does feel better, takes one quick look at the sleeping child next to her. Matty looks at her with a questioning look. She knows that she just needs to say a word and they’d be on their way back to the house. She appreciates it. But she’s okay. She will be okay. 

Just in that second, she can feel her phone vibrating in her small bag. She reaches for it, can see that she’s got a missed call as well as a text from Matty’s mother. She clicks on the notification and reads. Her heart stops beating for a second, and her stomach almost churns once more. 

<My love, please don’t tell Matty I called. Can you please give me a call back when you have a minute? I’m very worried and need to speak to you xx>

She swallows, texts her back and looks at her husband in front of her. This time, he’s the one looking out of the window. She doesn’t know why, but a bad feeling creeps onto her chest. A really bad one. 

[veronicaphoenix]

Chapter tags & trigger warnings: blind best friends, angst, alcohol intake, Japanese folklore. | Word count: 3.3k | Cross posted on AO3. | Series masterpost. ✧.*

General trigger warnings: This work addresses and depicts issues related to addiction and violence, contains explicit sexual content, and explores themes of childhood trauma. Reader discretion is advised. +18

I had been sick for the past three days, with fevers coming and going and coughing up flowers that had me not just confused, but considering the idea that I was definitely going mad. I had only told someone about it, and that was obviously Lia. However, I hadn’t been able to let her know until she stopped by for longer than thirty minutes.

She had officialy started dating Mitch and I was barely able to see her.

When she sat down on the kitchen isle and started researching my symptoms on her phone, she didn’t find anything that wasn’t just speculation. She suggested on calling my doctor or taking me to the hospital, but I dismissed the options, asserting that I was starting to feel a bit better.

And it was true. The time she spent with me that day made my health improve. She’d busied herself preparing me herbal teas and soothing down my fever with whatever we had in the house.

Aside from her care, things were different. She was in a relationship now, and for some reason, I felt there was a bridge growing between us. She avoided getting as close to me as she did before, and the way we used to hold each other’s gazes became null, for she would drop her eyes every time I caught her staring at me.

We had said that whatever we did, whatever relationship we got into, it wouldn’t affect our friendship, but there we were, drifting apart even while her hand was on my forehead, checking my temperature.

The day after her last visit, I felt pissed.

I went to the studio we had rented downtown to continue working on the new record. Lia wouldn’t be there that day. She was busy in a meeting a few hours from Los Angeles. Lia and I had had dinner and she had left right after, but that morning, I checked my phone expecting a message from her, letting me know that she was on her way to the meeting or that she had reached. There was nothing. Her absence and the fact that Mitch probably knew more about her whereabouts than I did put me on a foul mood.

I slumped in a chair, and my fingers immediately started tapping on the armrest as I listened to Matt talk. After ten minutes, I was sure the guys could feel the tension I have brought with me permeating the air in the studio. When Matt said something that I didn’t agree with, I replied to him in a tone that was not typical of me. Jolly and Folio exchanged uneasy glances, but I ignored them by moving to the next room.

Nicholas was the one to follow. When I crossed looks with him, there was concern etched across his face. I couldn’t avoid the inevitable question just the same I couldn’t avoid feeling like this.

“Noah, you okay?” He inquired, placing his coffee on the desk.

“Yeah,” I lied.

“Is this about the coughing? Has it wors—?”

“No, nothing to do with that,” I replied, pulling my phone from my pocket, checking once again for a message from Lia. Nothing. I returned the phone to my pocket. Nicholas still studied me intently. “I mean, I’m okay. If my voice doesn’t work, then fuck it. We’ll wait another week.”

“That’s not very typical of you,” he murmured, eyeing me suspiciously. No, it wasn’t. Breaking the planned schedule wasn’t my style, but I was also not known for being someone impatient. “But yeah, if you’re not feeling well, you should rest and let your voice get back to normal. We’re in no rush.”

“I am,” I responded, determined and frustrated. I was in a rush.  

“You know things won’t work out if you force them to happen.”

I needed to distract myself, to escape my thoughts. It was the reason I’d dragged myself out of bed and driven to the studio that day instead of calling Matt to say I was sick.  

“Oh, yeah, thanks for the great advice, man.”

I couldn’t handle it. I was irritable.

“What’s wrong with you, Noah?” Nicholas asked, irritation creeping up to him and into his voice, too. “Why are you so pissed?”

“Well, I think I have an idea why that is.” Jolly retorted, entering the room. He had overheard everything. Not that I’d done any effort to keep my voice down. He adjusted his guitar, ignoring the volatile energy around me.

I scowled; my jaw clenched as I glared at him.

Matt attempted to lighten the mood, sending only a sideways look my way as he joined us. “Come on. We’re all feeling the pressure here. Why don’t we just channel that into the music, yeah?”

I sighed, running a hand through my disheveled hair. I wasn’t sure I could give my best, given that I had spent the last two days coughing, but I was there for a reason, and I planned on making the most of it. “Fine,” I mumbled. I set my phone facing down next to Nicholas’ coffee. “Let’s get to it.”

Mitch was the first guy that Lia ever called “her boyfriend”, and the name nagged at me. Every other guy that had come across her way had been a flirt, a one-night stand, or a two-week fling. She never really felt anything too special for them, and she had always prioritized me before them.

With Mitch, it was different.

It had been two months. She was overly ecstatic. The first few weeks I had a feeling that Lia might enlighten Mitch with all the things that had happened in her life, maybe including the fact that I had been her first kiss. What little I knew about Mitch was that he could be very persuasive when it came to getting what he wanted, and I had never seen anyone so fixated on Lia as he was. Lia wasn’t one to open that easily, but it was the first time she was like this, so entranced with a guy, and I had my doubts at how much she would retain. She was always very careful about what information she would give away. Sharing with people facts about her childhood and her mother was something that she didn’t find comfort in, and every time someone asked how the two of us met, it was a common understanding that we would give a simple answer and diverge the topic. I didn’t know now if Mitch had any idea about her past, about where she came from and the things that her mother did —or didn’t do— to her.  

Maybe I was being too overprotective. Lia had already told me a few times that I was, but so was she, always disliking the girls I went out with and playing pranks to get them to leave the house the next morning in a rush, as if they had learnt something scary about me, whatever it was. Lia was getting really good at making shit up. We had actually had an argument a month before she met Mitch because she introduced herself as my fucking wife to the girl I had just slept with, mentioning the tattoo of her name I had in my neck. Lia pretended to be super angry at finding another woman in my bed. The poor girl thought I had cheated on Lia and left with her heels on her hands, screaming.

When Saturday came, I was expecting Nicholas to come over after lunch so that we could spend the evening playing videogames, but I received an unexpected visit in the middle of the afternoon which caused me a mix of happiness and unease.  

Lia threw her arms around my neck, exclaiming a very elated “hi” in my ear. It felt nice to have her in my arms again, but my tight grip loosened as soon as I spotted Mitch coming from behind. His car was parked in the driveway, next to mine. I could tell he was not very pleased with Lia’s affection toward me. I understood his perspective, though. His girlfriend had a best friend, another male, and she had a history with him, a life, if you’d call it. We had grown together, lived together, and slept together in the same bed countless of times. I wasn’t sure how much Mitch knew about our friendship, but it was enough to send him over the edge sometimes. He had already made a couple of comments about people mistaking her for my girlfriend instead of his, and he’d made it clear that he didn’t like it.

All I could think of was fuck you, dude. 

In a matter of thirty minutes, the house was full of people.

Jolly had a delivery coming up, new furniture for his room, and he had called some guy from IKEA to set it up because for the love of God he was awful at it and didn’t want us to help. Last time we set up his bed, he found two screws on the floor after a month and he was so scared that the bed would crumble at some point during the night that he unmounted everything and had a specialist come in. We thought we could entertain ourselves with videogames while the job was getting done on the other room, but with Lia and Mitch in the house, and Mike who came later with his girlfriend, the evening turned into an unexpected small event.

Beers were served, food was taken out. Before we realized it, we found ourselves sharing drinks with the folks from IKEA. Despite not lingering for long, they managed to enjoy a free beer and indulge in a plethora of snacks, enough to satiate their hunger well into the next day.

Jolly was just farewelling them from the door when my gaze diverted to the sofa, where Nicholas was playing videogames, and I spotted Lia in the corner, in the furthest area of the sofa, sat on Mitch’s lap, her mouth on his, his hand on her ass.

“Noah.”

“What?”

I turned around. I was standing by the kitchen isle, my hands gripping the edge of the counter. My knuckles had gone white. Mike’s girlfriend was looking at me with a friendly smile.

“I said ‘do you want another beer?’” She offered nicely.  

“Yes, sure,” I gave her a smile and accepted the beer she handed me.

Taking the first sip, I casually turned away from the group of guys gathered in the kitchen. Just as Mike, his girlfriend, and Jolly delved into what appeared to be an intriguing conversation, I made my escape.

Securing myself in the studio, I powered up the monitor, launching X and reviewing the latest piece I had been working on. Less than ten minutes later, a knock echoed on the door, and I knew it was Lia, evident from the gentle taps and the intervals between each.

She peeked through the door and smiled widely when she saw me.

“Hey, I noticed you slipping away from there,” she said.

She did? She had looked pretty busy to me.

She made her way in, leaving the door slightly ajar. The studio bathed in a soft, comforting light. Despite the noise coming from the living room, this was my sanctuary. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m not really in the mood for a party,” I admitted. “But I’m glad you came by,” I reassured her after I saw her features fall. Turning the chair, I faced her until I had her at arm’s reach. “How was the trip?”

She had been gone all weekend. Mitch had surprised her with some getaway weekend in Las Vegas, and I didn’t hear from her since the day before she left.

“Good. A bit rushed, though,” she replied, her attention shifting to a new book I had bought recently and that sitting atop a pile of other that I had pending to read. It felt to me that she wasn’t much eager to talk about the trip. “We did some sightseeing and I managed to drag Mitch out of the casinos and go visit the Neon Museum, it was super interesting. You would have loved it.”

Her smile could’ve lighted up the whole room if it wasn’t for the tinge of melancholy I saw in her eyes.

“I’ll make sure to check it out next time we’re in Las Vegas for a show,” I promised. “Did you do get time to go see the Antelope Canyon?”

“I wish! But Mitch isn’t much into walking.”

Too bad. Lia loved hiking. Two years ago, we had gone trekking to Yellowstone and had spent the night in the campsite, playing guitar and singing songs under the moonlight. I couldn’t imagine what fun she had found in Las Vegas if most of their time had been spent in the casinos.

“What does he like, anyway?” The question slipped out involuntarily from my lips.  

Lia narrowed her eyes and pointed a finger at me.

“I’m serious,” I quickly interjected, refusing to let guilt take over me. “I know he’s cool and he’s into music and all that, but what did you see in him?”

“Noah, let’s not go there again,” she said, weariness evident in her tone. She allowed herself to sink into she sofa, her eyes pleading and a faint smile on her lips. “I don't know what you have suddenly got against him. I’m happy, isn’t that enough?”

I sighed.

“Yeah, it is.”

I guess, I thought.

“But if it makes you feel any better,” she continued, straightening herself, “he takes good care of me, he makes me laugh and he makes me feel important.”

“He better do that, otherwise I will kick his ass.”

“I do not want to see that happening,” she affirmed.

A laugh escaped me, releasing some of the tension. After a moment of quiet, another question slipped from my lips.

“Does he know about your relationship with your mother?”

Lia’s demeanor shifted, a familiar guardedness that used to settle in whenever her mother was mentioned.

“He knows she didn’t care much about me. I didn’t go into detail because I don’t find it necessary.” She stood up. Her expression changed and I knew she was about to shift the topic. She approached me and grabbed a strand of my hair. “Your hair has grown so much. It’s longer than mine now.”

Good way to steer the conversation, Lia. 

“I’m thinking of cutting it.”

“Why?”

“I’m just tired of it. It gets so inconvenient sometimes.”

“I can braid it, if you want,” she offered, tilting her head a bit.

“No, thanks,” I replied, my words accompanied by a dismissive pff sound and a displeased look.

“Okay, Mr. Grumpy,” she teased, letting go of my hair. “How’s the coughing?”

“Coming and going,” I replied, not giving it too much importance. I was sick of it, of not understanding it. I had called grandma a few weeks ago and she told me something related to fairytales and love stories. I didn’t need any of it. I needed a cure before it got worse. “I was pretty fucked up a couple of days ago. But today, alas, I woke up just fine.”

“I’m tired of telling you to go see a doctor,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest.

“This has nothing to do with doctors, Lia. If I tell them what’s happening, they’ll either lock me up in the psych ward or treat me like a test specimen.”

“I know, but there must be a solution. What if it gets worse?”

I shrugged.

“Grandma said the solution is that you stay by my side, and everything will be fine.”

“Oh, how convenient for you.”

Despite what she thought, I wasn’t joking. I said that casually, but I was still grappling with whatever grandma had meant when she involved Lia in this strange sickness.

“Not interested in playing nurse for a while?”

“I had my fill of looking after you, Jolly, and Jesse when all three of you caught the flu three Christmases ago.”

That had been a crazy Christmas. All three of us laying in bed and Lia going from one room to another checking our temperature and making sure we were eating properly, and in the meantime, she’d kept on working, designing stuff for the merch drop we had planned for the beginning of the new year while trying not to get sick all at the same time.  She was unbelievable.

“Oh, by the way. I wrote something while I was away,” she suddenly remembered. She took out a sheet of notebook from the back pocket of her jeans and handed it to me. “Will you check it out and let me know what you think?”

It was a song. She had written a song while out on a road trip with her boyfriend.

“Of course.”

“Not now, though. Maybe when there’s less chaos in the house.”

I nodded, a little smile playing at my lips, eager for everyone to leave and night to come so that I could lock retreat to my room, MacBook at myside, and Lia’s handwritten lyrics in my hands.

I saved the paper in the pocket of my sweatpants.

 When my phone buzzed, I glanced at it briefly before deciding to ignore it.

“Are you not gonna reply?” She asked, curiosity evident in her tone.  

“Nope.”

“What if it’s someone important?” She inquired, moving some hair away from her face.

There was a hint of something in her voice, as if she wanted me to answer that there wasn’t anybody.

I made a clicking sound with my tongue, swaying in the chair.  

“It’s not.”

“Come on,” she oddly insisted. “Are you not gonna tell me? Are you seeing someone?”

“Lia, last time I brought a girl home, she ran away before I could get her naked because someone told her I had herpes while I was in Jolly’s room looking for condoms, and because of you I was left with a boner that I had to tend by myself.”

She covered her mouth with her hand to stifle her giggles.

The sound didn’t last long, though. The door opened promptly, and Mitch appeared from the well-lit hallway, his smile growing wider as he caught sight of Lia.  

“There you are. I’ve been looking for you for twenty minutes.”

The house is not that fucking big, I thought.

“Hey,” Lia greeted him, reaching out to touch his arm affectionately.

“What’s so funny?” He queried.

“Nothing,” Lia replied, shaking her head and trying to compose herself.

“Well,” Mitch draped an arm around her, “I think we should go. It’s getting late, and I have to be up early tomorrow.”

“Sure,” she agreed, her words being swallowed by Mitch, who leaned in until his mouth met hers.

My eyes lingered on the scene for a moment before I looked away, but not soon enough to miss Lia’s hand pressing against his chest and her nervous, uncomfortable laughter.

“Let’s get out of here,” she mumbled. “Can you grab my jacket and bag from the entry? I’ll meet you there in a minute?” She playfully slapped his ass, urging him out.

I pretended to be busy again with the computer during their interaction, but the truth was that I couldn’t focus my eyes on anything on the screen.

“In a minute,” he repeated, his voice demanding and stern. It was a good thing I didn’t see how he looked at Lia and how he pointed a finger at her; otherwise, I’d have told him to shove his demands up his ass.

With him gone, Lia turned to me, her hand briefly resting on my hair as she bid me farewell. She leaned in to peck my cheek and requested to text her whenever I finished checking her song.

“And don’t work too hard!” She shouted from the hallway, her voice fading away.

“Yes, ma’am!” I called back.

[lilcatdraws]

Crack A Smile and Cut Your Mouth

Ledger!Joker Origin Story

Chapter Eight - Life's Full of Surprises

Warnings: Character death, angst

Chapter Summary: Jack comes home and things are not at all how he imagined they'd be.

Author's Note: I'm gonna go ahead and apologize in advance 😅 I did not wanna have to kill off this person but it's character development for Jack. He's been through so much already I know, but you have to remember that it had to be a lot for him to eventually snap the way he does. You don't just randomly wake up one day and decide to become a mass murderer.

No I didn't use Heaven Beside You as the song inspiration because someone dies, it's deeper than that lol. I've also had this reoccurring scene in my head where Jack is driving down the road listening to the song at full blast. At this point he's broken from war and now this has happened. He's angry and hurting, mad at the world. This song just seemed fitting. Also I love Alice In Chains <3

Taglist: @alittlesmartcookie @furisodespirit

If you would like to be added to the taglist please let me know! <3

Jack walked through the bustling crowd of people with his head down and his hands in his pockets. He’d just got off a flight from Fort Benning. After he left Afghanistan, he went back there to finalize some things and officially be discharged.

The airport was not far from his hometown, less than thirty minutes away. Jack’s plan was to call the house and have somebody come pick him up. He knew it would most likely be his mother. 

He went over to the wall of pay phones and fished out a quarter from his pocket to put in the slot. He dialed his home phone number and waited. There was no answer. He tried a second time but still nothing. 

Okay… Scott’s probably at work and Mom must be out somewhere. Weird… I won’t bother with them then. 

He was unsure how he was going to get home now unless he rented a car. Then he remembered Mike. According to his mom during their last phone call, Mike was still going strong. Surely he wouldn’t mind taking him home.

Jack pulled a small notebook filled with contacts and another quarter out of his pocket and searched for Mike’s number. He was so glad he carried this with him. He wouldn’t be able to remember the number from all those years ago if he didn’t. The phone rang for a few moments and then someone picked up. 

“Hello?” A gruff voice said on the other end.

“Mike? This is Jack.”

“Hey! How ya doing buddy? Haven’t heard from you in a while.” 

“I’m alright I guess. Listen, I’m at the airport right now. It’s the one near Fairfield. I can’t get a hold of anyone at home and I was wondering if you could come give me a ride. I’ll be out front near the parking lot.”

“Of course. Give me about 20 minutes and I’ll be there.”

“Okay. Thanks Mike.”

Relieved that he had a way home now, Jack grabbed his stuff and headed towards the front. He sat down on a bench outside the building and watched the parking lot, bouncing his leg anxiously. He didn’t know why but since the plane landed he felt super jittery. He wasn’t sure if it was all the crowds of people making him uneasy or the thought of being home again.

Some time later he saw Mike’s car pull into a space. The short and stocky man climbed out and scanned the area for Jack. He spotted him and walked towards the bench, smiling. When he got there, he pulled Jack into a bear hug.

“Jeez, you’ve really filled out. How tall are you now?” He exclaimed as they walked to the car.

Jack laughed. “Good to see you too, Mike.”

He laid his duffel in the floorboard and climbed inside as Mike started the car and put it in gear. 

“So how’s army life been?” Mike asked. 

Jack shrugged. “Eh, hot and bloody. But that’s the desert for you.”

“I, uh, couldn’t help but notice the scar on your face. What happened?”

“A surprise attack. The humvee I was in exploded. I managed to make it out but a piece of shrapnel hit me.” Jack explained, shifting uncomfortably. 

“Oh. That must’ve been really bad. So are you home for good or are you just visiting?”

“I’m back for good now. I got discharged.”

“Why?”

“They said trauma reasons. I had a weird episode while I was over there. I think I could’ve made it a little longer but I guess they didn’t want to chance me having something like that while we were out on a mission. It could cause problems. I didn’t complain. I wanted to go home anyway and this was an opportunity to leave.” 

“Oh okay. Wow. Are you okay now?” 

“I don’t really know to be honest. I haven’t had anything happen lately but it could always come back. That kind of stuff is unpredictable.”

Mike grunted in agreement and focused on the road. Jack gazed out the window as they entered town and memories came flooding back to him. He was home alright. The jitteriness increased by the second as they got closer and closer to his house.

“How is my Mom?” Jack asked.

Mike slowed down drastically and nearly stopped in the middle of the road. He looked at him with a confused expression and seemed to be contemplating what he was going to say next. Now Jack was confused. Did he miss something?

“Don’t you know what happened?” Mike gasped.

Jack’s heart sank. “What? Is something wrong? Is she okay?” 

Mike sighed. “I think it’s best if you go home and find out. It’s not my place to tell you.”

“Um, okay… Is it bad?” 

“You’ll find out soon enough. I’m…I’m sorry, Jack. I thought you knew.”

Jack’s head was spinning. Oh God. No…

His main worry while he was away had come true. Something happened to his mother and he wasn’t there to help her. He sincerely hoped she was okay.

Mike turned down Jack’s street and pulled up to the curb in front of his childhood home. Jack grabbed his bag and turned to Mike.

“Um, thanks for the ride. I should go.”

Mike nodded grimly. Jack opened the car door and stepped out on wobbly legs. He felt sick to his stomach as he approached the house. 

He reached the top of the steps and took a deep breath. There was no telling what he’d find inside. He turned to Mike and nodded. Mike gave a thumbs up and drove away.

Jack set the duffel bag down on the porch and knocked on the front door, steeling himself.

“What? Who’s showing up here at this time of the morning? Better not be a fuckin’ cop!” A familiar drunken voice slurred.

Jack inwardly groaned. Here we go…

His father opened the door and started to throw something but hesitated when he saw his son.

“Jack? That you?”

“Yes.” Jack said calmly.

Scott tilted his head and stared at Jack, particularly his injured cheek.

“What the hell happened to your face?”

Jack looked down. “Shrapnel.”

Scott chuckled darkly. “At least you didn’t die. I was expecting as much.”

Jack narrowed his eyes. Forcing himself to keep it together, he ignored the comment and changed the subject. 

“Where’s Mom?” 

“Oh that bitch? Didn’t ya hear? She’s dead.”

Jack stood there a moment, staring back at the drunk in shock. He was unsure if he heard him correctly. 

“What?” He demanded.

“One night several months back we got into a fight. Then she hopped in the car and sped off from here. I had no idea where she was goin’. It was raining and she must’ve been too upset to drive because she crashed into an embankment and it killed her.” 

Jack felt tears form in his eyes but he quickly blinked them away. He would not let his father see him cry.

“You sick fuck! You’re lying!” 

“I’m not lying, Jackie. That’s what happened. Go look at the cemetery. She’s there.”

Jack wanted to hit him so bad. Why was he being so casual about this? He shoved Scott out of the way and stepped inside. The house was a wreck and smelled strongly of booze and weed. Dishes were piled in the sink and trash littered the counter and the floor. Maybe his mother really was gone. He refused to believe it.

“That’s not what happened! Where is she?” 

“What part of ‘she’s dead’ don’t you understand? Did you hit your head too hard out there or something?” 

Jack grabbed Scott up by his shirt collar, slamming him against the wall.

“You did this to her! Don’t tell me it was just a fight. You probably beat her until she bled. She wouldn’t’ve had to drive off like that if you’d just left her alone. You fucking piece of shit!” Jack screamed.

“Oh, look atcha all riled up. You think you’re some tough soldier guy now? You’re still the same weak little boy you were when you left.” Scott taunted.

Jack lost control and punched him in the face. Scott staggered backwards and tried to counter but lost his balance and fell over. Jack shook his head. This was pathetic. He could’ve really hurt him if he wanted to but he decided against it. This asshole wasn’t worth it.

“You…get out of my goddamn house. Go! Pack the shit in your room and leave. Take that black pick-up with you. I’m getting tired of looking at it.” Scott shouted from the floor.

“Fine. I wasn’t planning on staying anyway.” Jack muttered as he walked towards his old bedroom. 

He slammed the door shut as he entered and sighed. The tears came back again and this time they were harder to keep down. The realization hit him like a brick wall. His mother was dead. He didn’t even get a proper goodbye.

Jack ran his fingers through his hair and forced himself to focus on the task at hand. He needed to pack his things and get out. Quickly. If he stayed longer than necessary Scott might go off again. He did not have the energy to deal with that a second time.

His room was the same way it was when he left, except the dust and the cobwebs on the ceiling. The posters of his favorite bands were still on the walls. His drawings and sketchbooks were still there. His pocket knife was still on his nightstand. His bed was still made up and his clothes were still in his dresser and hanging up in the closet.

Before he got to work, Jack looked for more comfortable clothes to change into. He settled on a dark brown t-shirt and jeans. He gained a lot of muscle mass and grew a few inches taller while he was gone so it was hard to find clothes that fit well. 

After he got dressed, he went through his closet and his dresser and put his clothes in some cardboard boxes he found. He left the clothes he didn’t want or knew for sure he couldn’t wear. He also packed his music, his sketchbooks, his journals, his pocket knife, his skateboard, a few photos he had, and other useful things like a flashlight. He had no clue where he would go from here and what he might need.

He moved the boxes of stuff out into the hall. Double checking himself, he went through everything again to make sure he didn’t leave anything behind. Seeing that he was good, he stacked the boxes and carried them out to the truck, putting them in the passenger seat.

After a few trips, Jack hauled the last of his stuff towards the door. As he started to leave, he glanced over at Scott one last time. He was downing a beer and eating potato chips like an absolute slob. He didn't even look up. He couldn’t be bothered to at least say goodbye to his son. 

So why should I? Fuck him. Jack thought angrily.

He scooped up his things and flung the door open. A rage that Jack didn’t fully know the reason behind swept over him. He darted out to the carport where his truck was, not even bothering to close the door. He tossed the box inside as he climbed in the driver’s seat and sped out of the driveway. 

He was getting the hell out of here but first he actually listened to his father for a change and went to the cemetery to find his mama. 

…

The cemetery was less than 10 minutes away from the house and near a small church, which Jacqueline attended often. Jack used to go with her a lot, especially when he was little. He never fully agreed with or understood the Christian faith. He guessed there was some kind of higher power out there but he wasn’t really sure what. He only went with his mom when he was a teenager because it made her happy. 

Jack parked at the church and walked to the graveyard. The rusty gate made a screeching noise as he opened it. He trekked solemnly through the grass and scanned the rows of headstones for his mother’s name. 

Eventually he found her by a willow tree in the back corner. Wildflowers grew in abundance at the base of the tree and along the fenceline that surrounded the cemetery. Jack picked a handful of the blue and purple ones, knelt down by Jacqueline’s grave, and laid them in front of the headstone. He read the engraving and sighed as his suspicion was confirmed. 

Jacqueline died a few months into his third deployment. He understood why he didn’t find out at first because he was away from any US bases in Afghanistan where communications were. But when he came back to base after they were attacked, why didn’t he find out then? Maybe things were so hectic it was the last thing on people’s mind but still. He should’ve found out a long time ago.

Tears welled up in his eyes again and finally he let them fall. His poor mama didn’t deserve to suffer like she did and die so horrifically. He could only hope she went quickly and painlessly but he would never know for sure.

“I’m so sorry, Mama. I should’ve been here.” Jack sobbed.

He rested his head against the gravestone and just let himself openly weep for a bit. It had been a while since he had a good cry. He was already dealing with a lot. Trauma from the war, the hideous scar on his face, and now this. It was starting to feel like his life was slowly falling apart. 

Jack kissed his hand and then touched the gravestone. “Bye Mama. I love you. Always.”

Composing himself, he wiped his eyes before he stood up and walked back to the truck. He pulled out of the parking lot and started back down the road with no absolutely no idea where he was going or what the plan was. 

One thing was clear. He had to get out of here. This town held too many bad memories. If he was going to move on and get better, he needed to start over completely. The highway seemed like the best option right now. He’d take it until he figured out what to do. It wasn’t a very strong plan but it worked for now.

Jack finally hit the main road, leaving the small town in the dust. He was going 10 miles over the speed limit but he could care less. He was mad. This was not fair.

“Stupid bastard! Can’t even spare the decency to take her death seriously. I mean, what did I expect, but still! And I didn’t find out until now?! Almost three months later? No one stopped to think hey maybe we should tell her son! Oh no, he’s overseas, we shouldn’t bother him with that. That’s kinda something I need to fucking know!” Jack vented to the air. 

He reached down and grabbed his CDs from the floor, picked one, and inserted it into the truck’s CD player. While in the army he couldn’t enjoy music as much as he used to. The opening guitar riff on his favorite album as loud as he could stand it was so refreshing. It helped him to calm down a bit. He’d crash if he kept raging like this. 

Jack was furious at Scott for treating him and his mother like shit for so many years and being indirectly responsible for her death. And then to top it off, being completely careless and unapologetic about the whole situation. 

He was also angry with himself for not checking up enough back home. But what could he do thousands of miles away? He just had to accept that there was nothing he could have done about it. That devastated him.

Jack rolled down the window slightly to let some fresh air in, the wind blowing in his face. He belted out the lyrics of the next track as it came on and got lost in the music to let out his rage. 

He didn’t understand why all of this was happening to him. He was only 24 and he already had more problems than most people twice his age. Maybe this fresh start would be good for him. Being away from everything that caused him so much pain would be the best way to heal.

A few miles down the road, a gas station popped up out of the monotony of fields and trees in the middle of nowhere. Jack glanced at his fuel gauge. It was halfway to empty. He decided it would be a good idea to stop. There probably wouldn’t be another place to fill up for miles. So he parked beside a pump and went inside the store. 

“I need 10 gallons on pump 2 and a pack of Marlboro reds.” He told the woman at the counter.

The cashier grabbed the pack of cigarettes from the shelf and handed it to him. She rang up the total and told him the amount. As he dug some money out of his pocket and paid the cashier, Jack saw a flyer on the wall promoting Gotham City. It sparked a flicker of interest.

“Pfft. Nothing there but city scum and rich assholes.” He mumbled to himself as he left the store, dismissing the idea. 

After he filled up his gas tank, he lit a cigarette and started the truck, continuing down the road. At this point he was about an hour away from home. Aside from the military, he had only traveled outside his hometown a few times and not very far. From here on he didn’t know what was ahead. He could only read the road signs and glance at his watch to see how much time had passed.

Jack groaned as he passed yet another billboard advertising Gotham. This had to be the fourth one since he left the gas station. It was like it was trying to tell him something. But he did not want Gotham to be his only option just because he didn’t know what else to do at the moment. 

He’d heard many things about the city growing up. Some (usually people trying to get students to apply for Gotham University) said it was full of exciting opportunities and new experiences. Jack knew that was probably only true if you were wealthy or smart. 

On the other hand he mainly heard it was crime ridden and dismal, full of corrupt cops and politicians, and just simply trashy. Jack didn’t know if he could handle city life, especially since he was still adjusting to being a civilian again.

He passed another sign and threw his hands up in frustration. He couldn’t give up this easily but he needed to figure this out pretty soon. Currently he had no place to go and he didn’t like the idea of being homeless for too long. 

He had to look at the pros here. Renting a small apartment would be much easier than paying for a whole house in an obscure town and then there was the question of finding a house to begin with. If he went to Gotham, he could have a quiet life in an apartment all to himself. To him that seemed to be the best atmosphere for him to deal with all the trauma and grief. 

“Where else am I gonna go? I’m not staying back home in that God forsaken place and I can’t just live in the middle of nowhere. Homeless… Ugh. Fine. If there’s nothing vacant and if it’s too expensive, then I’ll find somewhere else. This will give me a chance to start over.” Jack told himself as if to solidify his decision.

So after much debate with himself, Jack began the three hour drive to Gotham City with nothing to go by but signs and an old map he found in his glove compartment. It was getting late in the afternoon and with everything going on he was feeling exhausted and super drained. He had to smoke another cigarette and keep some music on just to stay awake and alert.

He also hadn’t eaten anything all day so hungry was an understatement. He stopped at another gas station along the way and bought a deli sandwich and some Goldfish to snack on. 

Finally after a long, tiring journey up the interstate, Jack saw Gotham City’s skyline poke out over the horizon. He breathed a sigh of relief. He was still incredibly nervous about this but at least the driving part was over. 

As he crossed the bridge into the city, he marveled at how big everything was. The largest city he’d ever been in was Atlanta when he was stationed at Fort Benning and that was just passing through. 

Despite his anxiety, he was really looking forward to this new chapter. He was ready to move on with his life. He left his abusive homelife and got out of the military. Now it was time to focus on actual adult life. Becoming an adult while in the army did him no favors. It actually detached him further from everyone else.

This was going to be a major adjustment. That was for sure.

[foreverrandomwritings]

fandom jumping again, i'm going with my first love Natasha Romanoff on this one ❤️

"We tried our best." and "It hurts, but I'll live."

Uncompleted Missions

Summary: Natasha gets hurt on a mission that was anything but the simple one you were expecting. Will she recover quickly or will you be stuck waiting to see her open her eyes again?

Pairing: Natasha "Black Widow" Romanoff x gn!reader

Warnings: Mentions of injury and slight angst.

Word count: 1055

A/N: This was originally Friday's post but I changed my mind to make this a Women Crush Wednesday post instead. My Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw fic that was supposed to be today is now on Saturday's slot!

Masterlist M's Hundred Celly Masterlist

The mission you had been sent on was supposed to be a simple one. Retrieving data from a hydra base that was supposed to be empty. Natasha was supposed to go alone but a last minute decision by Fury had you tagging along. Neither of you minded though as you both enjoyed the time together. You had been dancing around your feelings for one another for years at this point. 

The mission did not go as planned though. Natasha laid on a table unconscious, you were sitting in a chair not far from her. Her red hair was messily splayed around her head. You had tried to keep your eyes open. The thought of not being awake when she came to made you feel uneasy. You thought briefly about the data you had left behind. But as the exhaustion from the day overtook you your eyes slipped closed.

You shot up out of your restless sleep at the sound of a grunt. Your eyes shot to the table. Natasha was attempting to sit up with a hand reaching up to her head. You got out of your seat and made your way towards her. Placing a hand on her shoulder she stilled her movements. 

“What the fuck happened?” she asked you as she laid her head back on the table. 

“We tried our best. But there was an enhanced we weren’t aware of on the base. They knocked you out somehow. I killed them before they could get to me.” you told her as you thought about the fear that coursed through you at the sight of her body collapsing before you. 

“Where are we?” she asked as her eyes took in the small room around her. You sat back in the chair when you were sure she wasn’t going to sit up.

“I’m not really sure. About thirty or so minutes away from the base I'm assuming.” You replied, shrugging your shoulders. You hadn’t really known where you were heading as you hurriedly left. Just wanted to find somewhere that you could stop for the night quickly. This was the first building you came upon. It was nothing more than a run down shed. A table and two chairs were the only thing left standing in the structure. 

“How’d you get me out?” she questioned you, her mind racing at the thought of you dragging her out of the building without any back up. 

“I carried you out on my back. Tied your hands around my neck with some rope I found in the base while we were on the bike.” You had both ridden a single motorcycle there. The vehicle was quick and easy to hide. Natasha had borrowed it from some guy named Rick Mason that she had business with for years. 

“How long was I out for?” Natasha was always one for questions, so the amount of them wasn’t surprising you at all.

“About six hours.” you replied as you looked at your watch doing the math quickly. 

“Did you call for extraction?” she asked you as she felt around her pockets for her phone. 

“They should be here within the hour. There weren’t any other agents stationed around here. So they are sending someone from Italy.” your shoulders sank as you thought about having to face Fury without the data. 

“Do we have enough time to go back to the base and retrieve the data?” her eyes met yours. 

“We are not going back to that base.” you told her sternly, shaking your head violently. There was no way you were going to go back to that base anytime soon.

“How’s your head?” you changed the subject before she could push it.

“It hurts, but I'll live.” she said as she ran a hand across her forehead. 

“You scared me, ya know?” you asked her as your voice shook eyes studying the floor beneath you. You and Natasha had been through so much together. It was typically you being the one getting hurt. She pretty much always saved you. You weren’t sure how she did it so often. You only did it once and you never wanted to do it again. The thought of losing her made you nauseous. 

“I know, little one. I know.” She said as she finally sat up. She climbed off the table and dropped to her knees in front of you. The nickname she had given you all those years ago made your heart ache. 

Thoughts of your first meeting flashed through your mind. You had both been sent on the same mission but for different reasons. She was there to kill the person you were sent to protect. She had looked at you and hadn’t expected much from your small stature. But you proved her wrong and she gained a massive amount of respect for you. You had been sent on the mission with Barton to find and eliminate her. But you had somehow convinced him to recruit her instead. A swaying factor in her answer was the fact that you were present. 

“Look at me?” she asked you sweetly, a hand coming to rest on your knee. You brought your eyes up to hers and you saw a look of understanding in them.

“It never gets better. Everytime I save you I feel sick for days. I don’t know what I would do if I ever lost you.” Her other hand came to tuck a strand of your hand behind your ear. 

“I love you.” You told her suddenly. You had said it to each other before. But this time was different. You knew she understood that as her eyes softened. 

“I love you too.” then her lips connected to your own. Slow and soft as tears came down both of your faces. You brought a hand to her chest feeling her heart beating within the cage of her ribs. She was here with you, she was safe and alive. The fear you endured seeping through your lips into the kiss. You finally pulled back as you struggled to breathe. Your foreheads rested against each other as you both came to a silent agreement that things would never go back to the way they were before this moment. You would forever and always be it for each other until your very last breath.

A/N: I had so much fun writing this! Genuinely can't wait to write for her more in the future! Thank you so much for this request! Happy Woman Crush Wednesday!

Tags(open): @wkndwlff @theeleggymeggy @chvoswxtch

[slafkovskys]

hi lovely jess :) for blurb weekend, could u maybe do luke hughes and reader babysitting one of the umich babies? like maybe baby power or baby beech🥹 i’m sure that would be so fun/chaotic lol

because the main baby beech series is also reader insert and the character is mentioned a few times in this blurb, i just refer to them as leni’s nickname for them ‘honey’ or use she/her pronouns :)

“they left us money for pizza,” luke calls from the kitchen. only a minute later does he poke out his head holding two twenties, “this is a sweet gig. i can see why she did it for so long.”

“luke!” leni pops her head over the couch and your boyfriend jumps. “i scared you?”

“a little bit, yeah,” he answers honestly, sending you a confused glance before coming to lean over the couch beside the little girl whom you’d been charged with caring for for the remainder of the night, “aren’t you supposed to be in bed?”

“sev-seven thirty?” she turns and looks at you for confirmation. “not now, though. we can have pizza before?”

luke looks at a loss for words, obviously having not been intent on sharing with your charge, so you swoop in, poking at the little girl’s side where you had learned she was ticklish, “what’s your favorite kind of pizza, leni?”

“i like cheese,” she turns around so that she’s no longer facing luke, but is now giving you her full attention. “sometimes pepperoni, but not all of the time.”

“i like cheese too. so does luke. do you want to split one with us?” you offer and her face lights up.

she reaches out and puts her hands on your knee, “i can eat a whole one all by myself. sometimes honey has to help me.”

“honey?” luke questions and you send him a look, “oh, honey. i know her.”

leni whips her head around, “how?”

“uh,” luke looks at you for help and you just stare right back. he didn’t really know her, only you did, which was how you had gotten the two of you this gig. there was no way that johnny would have trusted luke to watch his daughter alone, he didn’t trust anyone but her, but she trusted you and for johnny that was enough. he swallows, “we’re like best friends.”

“honey is my best friend.”

“oh, i-”

“do you want to call for the pizza, luke? so we can make sure that it gets delivered before bedtime,” you raise your eyebrows and luke quite literally runs back into the kitchen for his phone. you lean towards leni like you’re about to tell a secret and she plays into it, “even if does take a little bit. we’ll let you stay up later, you just can’t tell your dad.”

“pinky,” she nods her head and holds out her hand, tiny pinky outstretched and you wrap your own around it.

“should be here in thirty minutes or it’s free,” luke looks smug as he drops down on the couch on the opposite side of the room, but his face falls when he sees you still intertwined fingers, “what are you two doing?”

“y/n said that i could play with your hair!” leni uses you to slide down the couch and stomp over to the corner where a stockpile of toys was. she gets out a little box and carries it over to the couch where luke (who now looked mildly terrified) sat. after some assistance from her future client in opening her chest, she pulls out some hair clips and shows the boy excitedly, “green?”

“do you have blue?” he wages, “you’re a umich baby. not a state baby.”

“she doesn’t know what that means, luke.”

“state is gross,” leni mumbles and luke sends you a look. she roots around in her box before pulling out a blue butterfly clip and showing it to your boyfriend for his approval. with an uneasy expression, he agrees and helps the girl onto the couch. she gets all up in his space as she tries to tame his hair and clip it in, “too much.”

“too much?” luke scoffs.

“you do have more than johnny,” you laugh, “maybe you should get a haicut.”

“you’re on her team now?” he huffs and you nod just as leni starts to pull out more butterfly clips, “this is going to be a long night.”

[uncannysam]

PARTIES: @saithebatguy, @uncannysam TIMING: Early May SUMMARY: Sai stops by for a conversation about bats! WARNINGS: None!

Sai walked up to Escape Your Fate Comics, the Bat Week booklets he’d made up in hand. The idea had come to him at 11 am a week earlier, getting the small businesses in town to go in on a Bat Week festival. The economic benefits for the owners were obvious, and it would build local love for the animals, a sense of bats being an important part of Maine culture, which could easily lead to greater protections for them. It was small steps like this, that could build momentum for something big – like getting bats named the official town animal.

The open sign to the store was dim, and the front door was locked when he tried it. Looking over the hours sign that hung inside the glass, he was just a few minutes too late. But the lights were still on. Inside he could see someone standing by the counter. He knocked on the front glass a few times and waved to try to get the person’s attention. “Here about a business opportunity,” he yelled, hoping the person inside could hear, holding the Bat Week handouts up to the glass. He could try again tomorrow, a little earlier, but if the owner was here, now might be a better time to talk, without customers around to distract them.

—

Sam had been focused on cleaning and getting everything straightened up for the evening, before heading upstairs. Ever since her trip to the woods, life had felt strange. And it didn’t help that she was down an arm with the pesky cast that bound together broken bones. At least she had gotten to choose a cool color. If this thing was going to be a nuisance, she wanted it to be a bright neon green nuisance. But man did it suck. However, that seemed to be the least of her worries as she heard a pounding on the front door.

Looking up from her task at hand, Sam narrowed her eyes, before letting out a soft sigh. She had so badly wanted to yell out ‘we’re closed’, but instead decided to give the man the time of day, “What do you think, boy? You think I’m making a mistake?” Scout let out a huff with his eyes trained on Sam, before he laid his head back down on his paws, “Yeah, I hear ya.” Laughing softly, she moved forward and caught sight of the handouts he held against the door.

When she finally reached the front door, she unlocked it and opened it up slightly, “Uh, can I help you?”

—

“Hello!” Sai said to the person in a colorful cast, when she opened the door to speak to him. “I’m from Wicked’s Rest Bat Conservation. “Sorry to catch you a little late, but I’ve been trying to make the rounds of the local businesses. I’m trying to organize a bat week in town. It could drum up some publicity for the animals, and for the businesses who participate. Here, I have a pamphlet.” He balanced the stack on one arm as he pulled off the top sheet to hand over. He’d manage to scale it back to an approachable one-page pamphlet, albeit double-sided, from his original thirty-page master document of notes and selling points. Covered in colorful photos, he’d made a point of choosing the most endearing bat photos the internet had to offer.

But was getting ahead of himself already. “Are you the owner of this place?” Even if she wasn’t, it didn’t have to be a wasted trip – maybe she could pass on the materials, make a poster, speak to customers about it. He might as well still try and make his pitch. “Either way, if you have a moment, I’d love to come in and talk more about this opportunity.”

—

Sam couldn’t help but be leery. The man had seemed nice enough, but the last time she had approached someone who looked harmless, they turned out to be an old hag washing blood out of what looked oddly enough, like the clothes Sam had been wearing. This town was strange enough, but if she had let more paranoia in, she knew it would hinder her from the good people who resided in Wicked’s Rest, and this man, with his bat flyers, seemed harmless enough.

With a friendly, but uneasy smile, Sam took the flier and glanced over it, before stepping back and pulling the door open wider, “Uh yeah, I am. Will this take long?” She hadn’t wanted to stay much longer, but she always did respect anyone who was trying to make the world a better place for animals, “You know what? Come on in.” She set her eyes back on the pamphlet and the bat pictures, “So tell me a little bit more about the bats you’re trying to save and raise awareness for?” A Bat Week did sound interesting. And she had already had ideas stewing around in her head.

—

“No, no, it won’t take long,” Sai promised, mentally deciding to skip about two-thirds of his planned spiel. He didn’t want her eagerness to close up to affect any enthusiasm for bats. He stepped into the shop as she invited him in, glancing around at the boxes backed with comics, and colorful cover-front displays. A dog sat by the counter. An animal lover was a good sign, although love of pets unfortunately didn’t always extend to wildlife. He’d never been in the place before, but it looked welcoming. He imagined kids must love this place. A perfect audience for bat week – they hadn’t gotten ideas about rabies and other diseases put in their heads yet to scare them away from the animals.

“Thank you, and it’s good to meet you. I’m Sai,” he said, remembering his manners. “And we have eight bat local species, and in fact, just here in town and in the surrounding areas, we have a really prolific bat population. They’re such an important part of the local ecosystem. And they’ve been negatively impacted by human development encroaching on their habit, and most recently the white-nose syndrome. My hope is with an event like this,” he tapped on his stack of flyers, “We can build some local pride for the animals, and get people excited about conservation.” 

—

Sam was relieved to hear that she wouldn’t be kept waiting too long. It wasn’t that she was aiming to be rude, it had just been a long day, and her arm was starting to throb from all the movement, “You’re welcome, and it’s nice to meet you, too, Sai. I’m Sam. And I’m sorry if I’m coming off as rude. It’s just been a long day, and this…” she motioned to her casted arm, “hasn’t been the easiest thing to deal with.” She let out a tired laugh, but quieted quickly so she could hear what he had to say about the bats.

This man seemed to know a lot about the animals he was representing, “You’ve definitely done your research. And I’ll admit, I am a fan of bats. I don’t know a lot about them, but I do think they’re cute and deserve a home on this planet just as much as we do.” Sam paused for a moment thinking, “If you think you can get this Bat Week idea off the ground, then count me in. I have a lot of old Batman comics that haven’t moved in a while, and I think I could throw them in. Maybe do some research to see what other bat related comics exist. Thinking coloring sheets and some other stuff too, if you think that might help.” She smiled, growing more excited about the possibility of something like this. She hadn’t really had a chance to be involved in a big town event, and it would be the perfect opportunity to introduce more people to her business.

—

“Sure, that’s no problem,” said Sai. “I can keep it short.”  The end of the day was maybe not the best time to catch business owners, even though he didn’t have a lot of choice in the matter. Lots of hassled and impatient people by the time he got to them. Sam was comparatively pretty enthusiastic next to a couple of the people he’d already talked to. 

“Comics and coloring sheets would be perfect,” Sai said, as Sam started listing off possible ways to participate. It was everything he’d dreamed of when he first thought of Bat Week, the business owners taking their own unique spins on the event. He could provide the conservation information, sure, but that wouldn’t add the unique local town color that would get people excited about the event, and ask for it back next year. “Please, the more ways you can think of participating, the better. I can bring some posters and flyers about Maine’s bats, but I think this could be a great way for businesses to get creative, and think up ways for Bat Week to support their business. Comics and coloring sheets sound perfect.” 

He hadn’t heard of the bat comics she mentioned, although he had seen a few documentaries on Rodrigo Medellín with names along those lines. “Batman, is that like the bat man of Mexico? I’d love to buy one off of you,” he said, before remembering he’d promised to make it a quick visit. “If you haven’t closed the cash register down for the night.” 

—

Sam appreciated his willingness to be quick. She definitely wanted to meet back up with him at some point to further discuss this, if it was indeed going to happen, “I appreciate it.” She knew organizing community events had to have been hard, especially if you were a lone person looking to make a big impact, but the fact that he was making the effort was something special.

Oddly enough, Sam had been feeling more creative lately, and she wasn’t sure why. Despite that fact that the hike hadn’t gone ideal, and she was paying for it, there was an entirely different feeling of enthusiasm she was having in getting back to drawing and if she had to draw up something fun for the bat celebration, she would, “Good, and yeah, any information or posters you have, I’d be more than happy to hang them, and maybe even get creative and incorporate them into something.” She could do her own comic about bats! Well as long as the pesky cast didn’t get in the way. She had briefly forgotten about that in her growing excitement.

“The bat man of Mexico? No, this is the Batman of Gotham City.” Sam smiled, but was caught off guard when he had mentioned wanting to buy a comic from her, “I have shut down the register, but you know what? Hold on a minute.” Sam walked towards the back of the store, near a spot in the corner near the counter where the register was. Pulling out a box from underneath one of the tables that held thousands of comics, she thumbed through it before finding a Batman comic.

As Sam pushed the box back under the table with her foot, she gave Scout a quick smile, before walking back to the front of the store, “Here ya go. It’s on the house. It might not make much sense considering you won’t have all the context, because it’s a random issue, but if you’re interested in learning more about Bruce Wayne come back and see me, and I’ll get you started with some of the other Batman comics. You can also google him too.” She winked as she held out the random Batman comic.

— 

“Wonderful!” said Sai. “And if there’s anything you’re looking for or think might be helpful, just let me know. I have booklets, shirts, I think I might still have a couple mugs. Just let me know whatever you need, or just ideas you think people might go for. And I’ll figure out how to get them together.” He had gotten a few begrudging agreements to put up posters, but Sam’s enthusiasm was refreshing and contagious. “Do you think you could talk to some of the other businesses around here? I’ve been having mixed success so far. Maybe a familiar face might help.” Sai liked to think of himself as a good salesman, but that also meant switching tactics when something wasn’t working. Maybe Sam’s ideas could help get others excited about the Bat Week prospects for their businesses. 

He probably shouldn’t have offered to buy a comic, considering the time. But before he could backtrack when she mentioned having closed out, she was already pulling one out and handing it to him. Free of charge. “You’re too generous,” Sai said, as he took the comic from her, touched by Sam’s willingness to give it. “I don’t know Gotham City,” he said, looking over the front. A man in a tight grey outfit with a black cape, was splashed across a bright yellow background, striking a bat silhouette. Maybe the man turned into a bat. That sounded like a comic type of thing. “I’ll read it and let you know. I appreciate it. I like most things about bats. I’m sure I’ll love it. Thank you.” 

—

If it was one thing Sam knew, she knew that people loved free stuff. Giveaways, prizes, anything that made them feel good and like they had gained something in return for their time, “Well people do like free stuff. But I also know that free stuff can be costly. Have you thought about doing a giveaway? Maybe even a silent auction and dinner to raise money?” She knew auctions cost money, but there had also been the allure to get dressed up and feel fancy for one night. Plus, Sam was pretty sure there were some wealthier people living in Wicked’s Rest, like that random actress from Hollywood. “And yeah, sure. I know a couple of the people around here. I could ask them. Maybe ask some of my friends if they’d be interested in spreading the word.” She felt like this was something Maggie and Elias would enjoy. Winter she wasn’t entirely sure about. And the only thing she knew that Regan enjoyed was dead things – evident by the dead bird she had sent her back a month or so ago. She still couldn’t get the smell out of her apartment.

“And please do. I’m always interested to hear what people think about comics, especially if they’ve never read them before.” Sam was finding a lot of people in this town hadn’t, but that was okay, because it meant she got to help them experience their first comic book, and that was something special, “You’re welcome. But yeah, if you want to come back one day soon, I’d be more than happy to sit down and further discuss this with you. And I’ll try to talk to some of my neighbors and see what they think.” Sai had seemed like a very interesting guy, and she had hated running him off so soon, but she could feel her arm start to hurt even more, and she still had a few things to wrap before being able to head upstairs to her apartment for the evening, “Do you have a website or email address or something?”

—

Sai hadn’t considered fundraising. His financial strategy was mostly to just pour every free cent he had into bat projects. It was most of the reason he’d started the rideshare business. So far it had been working, but so much more was possible with real money – advertisements, local research, donations to local politicians. He had talked to a couple people recently about donating, though. The interest might be there. So much of his effort went into getting people to buy in metaphorically to projects, he hadn’t spent much thought on getting them to buy in literally and help fund them. 

“The free stuff is no problem, I’m happy to provide it,” said Sai. “But I think you might be onto something. We only started the conservation society a couple of years ago, and I haven’t done much to try and raise money for it. Maybe we could start a donation drive during Bat Week, you know, donation cans or something like that. As long as you don’t think it would interfere with your business.” He didn’t want anyone feeling sore about him siphoning off money from their customers or anything like that.

Sai flipped over to the back page of one of the bat week pamphlets, to point out the conservation society’s website, only to realize he’d neglected to add it. “Uh, here let me write down the email for you,” he said, fishing a stray pen out of his jacket pocket, and writing it down on one of the flyers. “And I’ll leave you with a stack of these then. For your friends and neighbors.” He set down half the stack he’d been carrying on a nearby box of comics. “Please, don’t be shy about handing them out. If you run out, I’ll bring more.” He could tell she was trying to wrap things up by him out with the mention of meeting again. Set with a plan and itching to text Dave about Sam’s fundraiser idea, for once Sai was happy to oblige. “I look forward to talking about this again. You’ve got a great mind for business ideas,” he said, tapping his forehead. “And please feel free to pass on my email. Let anyone know they can send me any questions. I really do think this campaign could have a great impact in town.” 

[faulix]

hurt/comfort

jin/leo 1079 words it's as the title says, it's hurt/comfort. something that's been on my mind while shipping with jin. enjoy!

Leo knew something was wrong the moment he opened the door.

Something was off. The lights were all off to Jin’s home besides the moonlight and a few streetlamps shining in. Leo felt around until he found the light switch, flipping it on. He was instantly greeted to the sight of beer cans littering the kitchen table, some of them tipped over and spilling beer onto the table. An uneasy feeling hit Leo as he started to move through the house, wondering just where Jin was. He didn’t even show up at ES this morning, already causing Leo to worry. Now accompanied with several beer cans in the house, Leo now knew why.

“Jin?” Leo called out to the empty room. Where was he? It’s not like he got drunk and then decided to hit up the town. He maneuvered through the house, flipping lights on as he slowly reached Jin’s bedroom. He slowly reached Jin’s bedroom, once again finding the lightswitch and flicking it on.

“Turn it off…”

Leo heard something mumble. He instantly noticed the massive lump on the bed of blankets and sheets. Leo approached the bed slowly, slowly shaking the bundle of covers when he stood in front of them.

“Nnn… no movement…”

Yep, that was Jin under there. He sounded drunk, as to be expected from the amount of beer cans he saw. “C’mon Jin. Get up.”

Jin didn’t budge. “Mnn… just let me sleep…”

“Not when you’ve probably been indoors all day,” Leo shook the bundle of blankets again. He slowly pulled back the layers of sheets to reveal Jin, who flinched as soon as light hit his face. Leo recoiled, instantly smelling the alcohol on him.

“Good lord… I saw the beer cans on the way in, but how much have you had to drink?”

“‘Nough… ‘s fine.”

“It’s not fine… honestly, you’re slurring your words. Akiomi would chew you out right now.”

Jin only groaned in annoyance. “What? You gonna chew me out like Akiyan?”

“No, I’m just commenting since we’re also dating,” Leo commented as he pulled back the covers further. “You didn’t show up at ES today. I know you like to play hooky with it, but we were worried.”

“‘s fine…” Jin responded as he slowly reached back for the blankets to escape the light in the room.

Leo only grabbed them and pulled them back, causing Jin to cover his face with his hands. Leo sighed, “Jin, you’re thirty-one, not sixteen. I know the alcohol is hitting, but c’mon. Get up.”

Jin slowly rose up, uncovering his face to stare at Leo. “What?”

Leo pushed aside the blankets to make room on the bed, sitting beside him. “You look like you’ve been drinking since 12… what on earth happened?”

Jin didn’t say anything at first. He only turned his head to the side to avoid looking at Leo. After a minute, he still didn’t speak up. It wasn’t until Leo slowly moved to hold his hand, his thumb rubbing circles against it. Jin’s face shifted, as if the weight of whatever it was continued to press on him. “What do you see in a man like me…”

The question threw Leo off guard. “What do you mean?”

“Mn… someone ran into me from Project Saga. It was the woman who confessed her feelings to me.”

Leo’s face twisted up at that. He had heard the story before from Akiomi. A little twinge of jealousy poked its nose in, but Leo shoved that thought down. “So she returned?”

Jin didn’t look at him, only nodded his head. “She only doubled down on what she said in the past. At least back then I could’ve blamed it on the alcohol we had at the party. She’s still married and confessin’ all that to me… I guess in the end I still can’t escape my sins of the past.”

“Jin… the image you portrayed as an idol wasn’t your doing. It was your agency’s,” Leo tried to soothe him, but Jin wasn’t having it.

“I still went with it. I still played with girl’s hearts as a part of my image. Even you found me first through my past idol activities and were intrigued by my image.”

Leo turned his head to the side. He wasn’t wrong.

“I felt scared again. My own past still looms over me and hasn’t gone away. I guess in the end I still can’t avoid turning to the bottle to avoid my feelings… sorry, you probably don’t want to hear the ramblings of a drunkard.”

“I asked you what was going on. I do want to hear how you feel… especially if you’re not feeling well,” Leo responded, turning back to look at Jin. Jin still didn’t look at him, so Leo scooted closer to him. “C’mon. Look at me.”

“How am I supposed to see you… Aren’t you ashamed of me?”

“I’m not ashamed. I’m worried. You’ve let so much of the past build on you, and to cover it up, you just turn to drinking and lament that no one should end up like you.”

“I owe it to my students to set an example, so I set the bad one.”

“You don’t have to set the bad one.”

In a split second, Jin turned around. He instantly wrapped his arms around Leo, burying his face in his shoulder. He didn’t say anything at first, just allowing himself a moment to keep Leo close. Leo allowed him his moment, holding him close. He could’ve sworn he felt his shoulder get wet with the weight of Jin’s tears, but he wasn’t about to point that out. He just let Jin get out his stress, all his worries, everything that’s been built up over the years. It’s weighed on him for over a decade.

Leo stroked his back. “It’s okay…”

Not everything was going to come out gushing all at once. Jin needed time. He needed more. He dealt with the weight of it all by telling his students not to end up like him as he drank the time away. Now the dams were bursting as Jin found himself in a new relationship, in a new love, and all Leo wanted was to see him happy. He could take all the time he needed. Leo would always be there for him. This drunken spell was a setback, but not the end. Leo just let Jin relax into his arms and find sanctuary there.