#it's just in this fandom specifically where the way ppl do it sometimes. feels uncomfortable. or at least poorly thought out

[lord-squiggletits]

Man there's nothing wrong with genderbends as a concept but there's something lowkey infuriating about this fandom's tendency to take canonically gay (or at least, MLM) male characters and genderbend them into women like. Is that not at least a little bit uncomfortable for anyone else here or is it just me

[iamnmbr3]

'why do you ship drarry, malfoy bullied him'

malfoy should have been redeemed and they are absolutely OBSESSED with each other. It might as well be romantic

And ppl seem pretty sensible. If a bit too horny

I have thoughts on this. Because the thing is, no one should feel like they need a reason to dislike a ship or to not engage with it. They can have a reason. But it's also just fine to...not vibe with something. That's ok too. There's content and ships that make me super uncomfortable or that just plain dislike. Sometimes for clear specific reasons and sometimes just...because. Sometimes to the point that I hate even scrolling past it on ao3. And that's all ok. What's not ok is harassing other people over or it dictating what other people like or engage with. Wish more people remembered that. It would make fandom so much nicer if people could all do that.

And yeah. I feel like Draco's story needed more closure. I mean, canonically he does get a redemption arc - he changes his views and becomes a better person - but JKR somehow both wrote that and also doesn't acknowledge the implications. Also, after being such a central character and being literally the reason Harry wins his duel against Voldemort it feels weird for him to not at least have a final conversation with Draco where he gives his wand back etc. (And then they fall in love and get married epilogue whom?!)

Also I am more than on board with super dark highly toxic enemies to lovers ships. They aren't for everyone but I like them. To me personally though, drarry doesn't really fall into that category, at least as it is presented in canon. What Harry and Draco have to me feels like a rivalry - a very intense, very hostile one (I mean they do literally end up as soldiers on opposite sides of a war), but a rivalry nonetheless. And there is obviously a grey area between bullying and rivalry. My point is not to dismiss all the ways Harry and Draco have hurt each other. But merely to point out that to me the dynamic feels very different than shipping Snape and Sirius for example, or Draco and Ron for that matter, where it feels like there's more of a clear past bully & victim dynamic. This is not a reason to ship or not to ship any of these ships. To each their own. It's merely a commentary on how I tend to view drarry.

As to the last point. I don't think people can really be "too horny." Sex and sexual desire are just as valid to explore or depict in fiction/art and just as valid a reason to create fiction/art as any other reason. Generally speaking I find that the best and most creative and diverse fandom environments that lead to the greatest quality and diversity of content are the ones where people who want to be 'horny on main TM' in their creative endeavors can be without fear of any type of negative repercussion. That's not to say everyone has to create, enjoy or even engage with that type of content. But its presence is usually a sign of a healthy fandom ecosystem.

[burst-of-iridescent]

so sorry you've been getting these anons ana :( i thought as a native i could give my two cents on the fire lady katara trope? ill admit im more of a casual zutara shipper, so i havent seen a good chunk of the fandom, but ill give it my thoughts. for me personally, i am not a fan of fire lady katara- it's not particularly to do with the trope itself, but the execution often done by the fandom. ive discussed this with other natives before, but sometimes in the fire lady trope, it is often that katara moves to the fire nation, that she wears fire nation clothes and is surrounded by fire nation culture. obviously, that isn't wrong! the sharing of culture is a beautiful thing, but there is a good majority of fics where it feels like her water tribe culture is forgotten, that she is made to move permanently to the fire nation in favour of zuko. specifically in a post war climate, where a good majority of the people in the fire nation would still hold onto imperialist and racist beliefs, the idea of katara living there permanently is uncomfortable. i moved out of my mostly native village into a nearly fully white uni, and it's scary, and so when i apply those thoughts to katara living in the fire nation, its uncomfortable. and as for the rest, it's mainly just how sometimes it feels like the fandom doesn't value her culture as much as zukos, even unconsciously- it often feels like the fandom values the perceived glamour and power of the fire nation royalty, and finds fire nation culture more understandable than anything water tribe, and so prefer to have katara in a setting that is more 'easy' for them. in hand with this, is often the fandom perception that the water tribe is less progressive than the fire nation, that they are sexist and that zuko is giving katara a better life (i will say that this is not something i have not seen often, especially recently, but it is something i have discussed w people so i thought id mention it, especially since its usually not intentional). sorry this got so long, i went on a bit of a ramble but obviously this isn't the be all end all. like you said, there are lots of people who are fine, or enjoy fire lady katara because they perceive or write it differently, and that is fine! everyone perceives media differently, just like some people will be uncomfortable with zutara, some might not be. i just thought id send this as a reason why some of us do dislike the trope, and things to keep in mind when ppl are writing it

hi anon, thank you so much for sharing this with me! i really appreciate you taking the time to write out your thoughts and offer your perspective on this.

i definitely agree that the fire lady katara trope can be executed in some exceedingly problematic ways. there are many zutara fics that i've clicked out of for the reasons that you've mentioned, especially older ones that were written around when the show aired or shortly after. i won't deny at all that there are ways people write the zutara relationship that make me profoundly uncomfortable. my problem arises when someone assumes that the trope itself is inherently racist or wrong, instead of understanding that it can be written in a variety of ways by a variety of people, who bring their own perspectives - and prejudices - to their individual portrayals.

what you said about moving from your mostly native village to a fully white university really struck a chord with me because (although it's not the same, and can never be) i can really sympathize with those feelings of alienation and sudden lack of belonging. i'm part of the desi diaspora myself, and i've grown up in a country where i've always been the minority, and had to deal with racism and ignorance, so your experience really spoke to me. i hope that doesn't come across like i'm trying to co-opt your struggle or anything like that, because that was not my intention at all. i just wanted to let you know that i can understand what a scary feeling it is, even if not exactly in the same way.

that being said, personally if i could choose between spending my life in india or growing up overseas, i would still choose to do the latter even if it meant living through the bigotry and ostracization i've experienced again. i love the life i've built here, though it's a more difficult one than what i could've led back home.

in the context of atla, i agree that katara would most likely face racism and discrimination in the fire nation, at least in the immediate years following the war. but personally i also find a very empowering narrative in seeing her confront and dismantle the prejudices within the fire nation system, just as she did with the sexism of the northern water tribe. katara wouldn't abide bigotry in any form, and i think fighting inequality is a battle that she would want to take on, and would willingly choose to take on whether she ended up with zuko or not. that's why i take issue with the insistence that her becoming queen of the fire nation inherently equates to her victimization, because it can also very much be a power fantasy, and i know many woc who do see it as such.

(of course, that is just my own perspective, and i completely understand why others see it differently and might not be comfortable with it. their feelings are just as valid and legitimate.)

ultimately, i think correctly executing the fire lady katara trope isn't just about katara herself valuing her culture, but zuko doing it as well. i love seeing explorations of the trope (and the zutara relationship in general) where zuko takes an active interest in katara's heritage, incorporates her traditions and practices into his own life and home, and involves himself in her culture just as much as she involves herself in his. zutara is a ship that has always been about equality to me, and that's something that can and should carry over to how they blend their cultures together. like you said, there is nothing wrong in katara wearing fire nation clothes, or being surrounded by fire nation culture - so long as she isn't the only one in the relationship taking an interest in her partner's heritage. thankfully, in most zutara content i've seen, she isn't.

in my own personal view of katara becoming fire lady, it happens only years after the war ends. she spends her time postwar travelling the world and kicking ass, empowering women in the north to learn waterbending, rebuilding the southern water tribe, meeting and learning from everyone she can. when she becomes fire lady, she continues to travel often - home, of course, but also to the other nations when necessary, using her skill of inspiring and motivating others, and her desire to help the less fortunate, in matters of international diplomacy. when she returns, her husband is in blue, and her children wear whalebone beads in their hair, and there are fire flakes next to stewed sea prunes on her dining table. there are hard times, but there is also love and respect, and so she changes the world as she damn well deserved to in canon.

[stardustdiiving]

I would read your zhongxiao codependent yuri Like, I do generally picture them as a vaguely father/son dynamic BUT THAT IS NOT CANON. It's just as much fun to view them through a romantic interpretation! Idk why people can't view the same characters in different kinds of relationships without being weird about it.

Anyway I love your vision and would love to hear more about it lakdjs

THANK U SO MUCH Im not sure if I’m gonna write zx in the future since I’ve tended to be shy about posting my stuff relating to them for over a yr now, but I did post this fic with them last year while trying to get a hold on how to write them (mind the tags it’s pure angst omg). I was too shy to tag it as ship since it didn’t feel shippy enough, which is kind of funny to me in hindsight bc I reread it and am like. Man I think only a zx shipper would write this NUFNVJVJV

Post got kind of lot Im gonna go on a tangent about them under the cut

Honestly my theory for why ppl r very set on the father/son interpretation is everyone’s immediate thought on to how to make the power imbalance between them seem less uncomfortable is to apply a parental interpretation to it. Which is fine ofc, I get it, but the way ppl push it as canon a lot kind of grates on me a little bc they’re usually incredibly passive aggressive and pushy even if u clearly designate ur post as ship OTL

Also not really a fan of the characterizations either since ppl tend to treat Xiao like a moody teenager Zhongli has to reel in (this is hilariously reminiscent of the post I made about how ppl handle scaramouche and nahida a bit ago haha). And idk I just feel kind of polarized about the headcanon overall bc I associate it with people being really uncomfortable and frustrating about zx

I just like how there’s sort of an imbalance to them, some zxs like them being more fluffy and functional but I sort of like it where it’s not like, entirely dysfunctional but I’m prioritizing a specific kind of character study over romance. This tends to be how a lot of my ships go ngl I just sometimes enjoy the intensity/intimacy of romantic feelings thrown into the mix if it makes it interesting but I’m not often interested in a lot of my ships following more standard romance plots(?) I guess? Unless it’s specific ones. Which sounds clinical when I put it like that but this is just bc I am very aromantic NHFBVJVJ

When I say codependency in zhongxiao honestly it’s sort of a theoretical(?) codependency—not sure how to word it? I think Xiao would be really fucked up if he didn’t have Zhongli in his life suddenly but I don’t think his relationship with getting attached to people invokes what people would majorly think of when they think of codependency in a ship I suppose. It’s moreso I just feel Xiao could be at his worst with dehumanizing himself in comparison to other people with Zhongli, because said mental state is driven by how he feels about debt, service, and duty which are very closely tied with devotion and how he would feel about someone he considers his god and leader, as well as someone who saved him

It’s fun this is paired with Zhongli who generally knows how to work with Xiao kind of understands the self destructive depth Xiao’s loyalty/devotion comes with. Also fun they have been around each other for a very long time and Xiao as one of the adepti is familiar with the past I think Zhongli appreciates having around. They work but it’s also a case where Zhongli is in such a position of power over Xiao its kind of very delicate situation that’s hard for both of them to navigate. Which is fun to explore. I esp love contrasting it with other Xiao pairings (actually i think i still have that xiaoven fic up on my ao3 where I tried to convey a specific interpretation of them in a similar exploration vein too)

I totally get why people wouldn’t like it (I feel a lot of my opinions on xiao ships just clash with a lot of fandom consensus so bad all the time And it’s just bc I’m like this I’m not even trying to be contrarian or anything. HELDINCJD) but I just tend to handle shipping in a specific way. It’s not I don’t enjoy fluffy or lighthearted zl and xiao stuff I actually enjoy it a lot I just like there being layers. This makes it feel more impactful when I think about how Zhongli looks out for Xiao in canon or how Xiao gets like textually flustered talking to him (lantern rite 2023 was so tailored to my tastes it’s not even funny)

[bijoumikhawal]

Part of the problem with MLM fetishization discourse (mainly found onTwitter, but i see it here too), is that people see effeminacy and femininity in men itself as a fetish, and therefore can't be assed to understand actual issues we face with regard to sexuality

It's impossible to talk about fatphobia, underlying assumptions often related to white supremacist beauty standards, adultification, ageism, etc that feminine men experience because people are too busy getting in a tizzy over a guy wearing skirts in media. One of the big issues for me is hypersexualization- I was getting sexualized at a very young age for being what I am, it's a big issue historically, and a lot of media I could access when I was younger was basically just porn/erotica. And that porn/erotica was often like. Racist, it hypermasculinzed Blackness in comparison to white effeminates, and it only portrayed fem men as submissive bottoms (which isn't itself bad) whose effeminacy was humiliation, and submission was bc they're worth less than "real men"

And like, the joke is people are so focused on wether or not people writing femmes who bottom is bad (it's just a thing that happens irl) that you can't talk about anything else. It's also a form of hypersexualization. The only other thing ppl wanna discuss is "heteronormativity". Fiction where femmes are fucking isn't a bad thing with that being said, and desexualizing us is also a common homophobic thing to do, and tends to loop back to the "less than a real man" thing.

And like, "yaoi"/"BL" isn't the big driving factor in hypersexualization here. If nobody in the US knew what that was I still would've been getting hit on by men twice my age at 16 (who sometimes would loudly advertise their interest in femmes specifically, or more accurately, "femboys" and "tr*ps").

And honestly when you deal with just like- grown ass men looking at you that way, people moaning and bitching that the big concern for fetishization here is basically wether or not the character exists only deepens the shame felt from those interactions. I was made to feel uncomfortable and gross because my gender presentation was seen as sexual when I was a teenager, and all this shit does is go "yeah, it is sexual, when I look at people like you I think about sex and how the sex you have is bad". And part of my Ick with portrayals of femmes is that we're assumed as submissive bottoms because I'm not, but this is still deeply harmful to people that are because you're telling queers the way they fuck is morally wrong and you're instilling shame over it.

And like... actual fetishization for me is more often when femmes as objects of sexual desire are seen that way through a lens of "you're a faggot so you're beneath me, you should thank me when I call you slurs and do xyz, you're trash, shaving you so you have less body hair (so you look more feminine) is a punishment and symbolizes my superiority" because it's just intracommunity femmephobia/effemiphobia with a boner.

Its not that other things are non-issues but cis women clumsily writing a masc/femme dynamic is probably more likely to make me laugh than feel ashamed or disgusted, and instances of feminizing a character for bigotry reasons in fandom are less common than people complaining about effeminacy existing at all (including with femme transmasc characters, especially because usually those aren't being written by cis people). The actual things that have made me cringe with shame and disgust about cis women's view of feminine and effeminate men sexually are more difficult for me to unsnarl because I see it less often, and it's sometimes more visceral because while I was sexualized by men I was actually abused by women, but I'll be frank; those things usually aren't occurring in discussions about fandom.

When I get disgusted in fandom discussion isn't about femme characters existing at all, or top/bottom/switch- they're about people acting like writing romance/erotica about men fucking is the sacred right of cis women and any discussion about equity in publishing means you're attacking fandom when they're two different things, and that that right is more important than the fact that queer men can struggle to get published in romance- and subsequent issues with poverty. Or the insistence that to be fetishized you need to be a woman because fetishization is stored in the pussy (revealing they haven't thought about racism in the romance genre, and don't think about trans women). Its about queer men in fandom writing smut and getting harassed by women who write the exact same type of it because the way they do it is somehow bad. It's about my sexuality being seen as piece of land to fight over, that I'm not supposed to be on, not writing about men in fishnets.

[single-malt-scotch]

me and my controversial topics will stay under the cut lol.

i know i blabbed lightly of this probably but obviously one of the things that put me off from mcyt for a few years was when the "rpf is bad" opinion started circling the internet more frequently, in tumblr's 2014-2016 toxic callout culture era. i think that era shifted YT fandoms as a whole and turned loads of ppl to presenting creators with their "characters" specifically (like i recall this early on w markiplier and jacksepticeye) and clarifying it often. but i find this all very amusing when 80% of the ppl dont actually play characters at all, and ppl are either just writing "rpf" or theyre just turned a creator into their own OCs. i think its sometimes just a way to not associate with the idea of rpf even if its like, right there.

like, the problem i think is that the majority of fans, namely the young teens that are the main audience, are very consumed by purity culture and being free of problematic interests in such a black and white way. i get it, i understand why you dont want to be associated with rpf. when i think of weird and uncomfortable rpf i think of.... fan fiction of the Beatles, or something. a band or a movie actor is someone we can easily define as "not a character" but... when it comes to mcyt, its a little more grey, because i know some of them goof around in games and do bits and exaggerate themselves.

and yet i still think its counter productive to get caught up in these woes, and to deny what exactly it means for something to be rpf, or have rpf elements. ironically i think the indulgence people have with making them characters worsens the parasocial/obsessive/skewed lens people have on creators these days. how? well its bc of how ppl get super attached to characters... comfort characters, kinning, etc. i love characters just an intensely, but when you apply this to a youtuber who like, doesnt actually play a character? even tho you wanna act like they do? .....there can definitely be issues in that and its def what makes me not get into the fandom as it is. you elevate them with your view of them as a character by being able to indulge in them way further bc they are kind of "yours" now. but also theyre not really.

but specifically back to the rpf vs not rpf topic- basically what i really intend to say is that like. there is harm in becoming too concerned over what youre writing bc you can fall into that mindset of being far too aware in a way thats just gonna make you feel terrible all the time (i experienced this myself when i was like 15 on tumblr and wanted to avoid any potential of touching something "problematic"). this post isnt to declare you are writing rpf, or you arent, or whatever the"rules" are about when it is or isnt, but just that theres always time to just accept shit as it is when the blurry lines arent actually doing any harm in this case. and that even trying to force yourself into the seemingly right direction doesnt exactly solve all the other problems either.

cuz i did all the things ppl would wanna call me out for and i dont care at this point. i wrote fan fiction where the guys where more characters than themselves, in a fantasy world for the server. but i also wrote fan fiction that was irl and based during minecon! and it was smut. and all i can say to that now is...ok. im not even gonna sit around and vehemently condemn it either? even if i never plan to do it again. cuz i dont see the need to punish my past self, nor do i see the reason to continue questioning the nuances of where the line between hard rpf and hard fiction lies with this bc its a never ending conversation. its just not worth my time to worry anymore. i know how to not be weird about it, i know my boundaries between creator and fan, i dont even get near the extent that some people do... i feel like im aware enough to feel like im not causing harm/can make logical choices when issues arise. i was a niave teenager before, and wrote such things with little thought, and had a much less healthy mindset about it! but the way the internet laid on the pressure of these strict definitions was the moment i felt shame, and as if i couldnt ever redeem myself from actions i understand far better now. its really not worth the stress and heartache to get so caught up in it.

[tea-and-finalfantasy]

will delete. complaining

tf u mean no proshippers allowed in mortal kombat

like mortal kombat?? THE cornerstone of gore???

kenshi getting blinded?? first thought: i know Exactly where this is going for a lot of people

like ppl assume "proship" means like. the most problematic ship u can think of so the assumption is that someone who's anti-censorship or pro-fic is code for one specific thing bc it creates the most negative reaction

but even if that's the go-to of like, oh so you like (worst thing imaginable?)

it's anything ppl turn up their noses at and people either get tripped up when something upsets them but isn't a ship or they're operating under the assumption that everyone anti-ship is against all the same things

so you get some people engaging with the excessive gore in mortal kombat who are able to recognize it's not real while simultaneously saying "no proshippers" bc they assume their limits on what content they consume/what themes or features or dynamics they find interesting is acceptable while others' limits are not--that they can enjoy something in the "appropriate" way or they spend all their time condemning something we all know isn't good

and then you have other people who consider gore "wrong" and "gross..." but are ignoring the fandom they're in??? you don't have to enjoy it

AND THAT'S THE POINT OF THE WHOLE ANTI-CENSORSHIP MOVEMENT--THAT REGARDLESS OF WHAT YOU "ENJOY" OR "DON'T ENJOY"/"FIND INTERESTING" OR "DON'T FIND INTERESTING," YOU DON'T POLICE WHAT OTHER PEOPLE CREATE OR ENGAGE WITH FICTIONALLY

but ppl will then act like it doesn't exist. like mk isn't founded on gore when they focus on the ships they like

which like. i'm doing that generally as i like the ships more than the blood and guts (sometimes/sometimes it's both at the same time) but i don't suddenly pretend that that's not what mk is about just because i enjoy stuff in it. we don't get to sit around and delete the basis of an entire franchise because of a different media that didn't have something you liked in it/something you feel balances out what makes you uncomfortable

like even though it's called "pro-ship" in a lot of online spaces bc of the focus on not telling other ppl what to ship, it's all kinds of ship dynamics from "illegal" to abusive,

but also characters engaging in "unsafe" things consensually. it's "unsanitary" and "gross" content. it's blood and guts and death and fantastical representations of things where no one dies but you still get the guts

there are ppl who think that bc fursonas and furries are "more accepted" now that people find no issue with it. some people's limits are with knots/non-human genitals while some people are fine with that but their limits are with feral content. some people think they have to be bipedal while others think it's fine as long as there's human language involved or some kind of mutually understood consent

but everyone seems to think that whatever their limits are should be what others' limits should be for fiction

i follow so many fantasy sex shops that have dildos with knots but then assume that that's fine and common and normal and okay WHICH IT IS BC IT'S A FANTASY but assume that that's common knowledge, that of course no one would have an issue with that

as if they're not similarly targeted??? as if they're exempt bc it's just a fantasy but as soon as it's a limit of theirs, it's not right? what if one shop doesn't do knots but another does? is the assumption that the shop that sells knotted toys is automatically in the wrong rather than it just being a preference???

sorry for all this it's just. how the fuck are u in the fandom with gore and then u go "no proship" as if people don't think the gore is disgusting and wrong and fucked up and that you're fucked up if u engage with it. why do you think you're exempt

[shoezuki]

Preamble that I feel bad for the guy tbh but how he's dealing w/ it is on him. End a the day he's a whole stranger and he's not like two, he can handle himself (presumably) and if he can't it ain't our business. Also necessary preamble that there are many Ranboo enjoyers who aren't cringe. A lot of them actually. To the point where I don't really like to bring stuff like this up in specific bc it Does magnify problems via exposure

However. Disclaimer that this is a complaint about the worst aspects of my time in a fandom and that this is not all of it aside

TWT RANBOO STANS *DESPISE* LISTENING TO "OUR" STREAMER LIKE NO ONE FUCKING ELSE. THEY FUCKIN' HATE IT. EVERY WORD THAT IS SAID ONSTREAM OR ON ANY OF HIS MEDIA ACCTS IS NOTHING TO THEM. Ranboo is literally not even a streamer to them the way they act. The man will beg, literally fucking BEG over and over to not mention him in people's chats, to not *yell at people in chat to not spam,* to please not use him as a profpic if they're getting into drama, and then concede ground to please not use him as a profpic if you're sending threats, please do not fucking send threats, please, he has said this so many times, and Yet my comrades' twt blocklists are full of Ranboo profpics that send death threats with 0 shame. 0 shame, what so fucking ever. Chat too! Chat the fuck too! Chat is way better than twt bc at least it's not violent but I swear to Christ they are literally deaf! Begging for answers to questions that are answered in his bios and over and over onstream already and in the FAQ that is RIGHT THERE if you scroll down a HALF FUCKING CENTIMETER! Spamming stupid shit, and then spamming "CHAT STOP" even as streamer exhaustedly says "chaaat putting 'chat stop' just makes more spam".

Literally not a single Ranboo stan has basic damn listening or reading comprehension. It shows in how people fail to comprehend basic fucking facts abt his RP character (everyone knew this was coming) and it shows in how no matter how much he fucking pleads people to stop sending fucking death threats with his face attached or says he's uncomfortable giving out certain information people will just trample on those boundaries as if they ain't fucking there. Being in the Ranboo stan twtbase is literally training to blatantly ignore boundaries and dehumanize streamers and it shows in every aspect of how they treat not just "our" streamer but every single person, character, and social media personality they goddamned come across as text to speech machines, dressup dolls, and punching bags

It honestly blows my fucking mind. Like. Ostensibly, you enjoy this streamer and his content, right? Which I would think means you watch his content? But apparently fucking not!

It is honestly fucking disgusting it is unbelievable. I don't like to dwell on it for aforementioned reasons and like, dwelling is also smth streamer has mentioned correctly as Not Good, but genuinely the situation in certain small vocal pockets of the Ranboo stanbase is horrific and I hope these people get so much help and also maybe better material than increasingly unreadable censorship for "die." Actual productive debate is really fun, guys, come have a redemption arc and argue about the effects New L'Manberg had on c!Ranboo with me, please, why can't we all be nice, god, why,

Anyway that's my piece. Thank you for hearing me out I believe this is the first time I've gotten the chance to try to flex the new lack of charalimit for asks and I must say I enjoy it

YEAAAAAA FUCK IT UUUPPPPP FUCK YESSSSSSSSSSS JESUS FUCK YAAAAA

tbhtbh I USED to watch ranboo but i jus like. Cant anymore from donations n the unfortunate fact that So Many People whove gotten At me on twitter have ranboo pfps and how a lot of them treat him is genuinely Gross to me. Even jus w like. Seeing shit bout him and tubbo being 'roommates' rn like i HATE that shit. Ppl objectify him n ignore his boundaries n jus do such horrible shit w his name all over their accts n its despicable. I feel so harshly for the dude like that shit Sucks. But also he does tend to 'give in' to twitter shit sometimes like when he was saying not to trend stuff bout his meetup because he didnt want to 'overshadow' current events (altho ppl on twitter couldnt even listen to him for THAT)

Its jus a Shame cuz like. The dude Is genuinely cool. N he cares a lot. I feel his 'fans' of this calibre take advantage of his leniency/desire to please people and his Anxieties around messing up in any minor way n they jus. Walk on him in that regard. Cant even respect their own streamer

I think a bit ago i said somethin on it like. How sometimes i think these twitter ppl dont even LIKE ranboo or actually Watch Him. They jus want to feel some sort of moral superiority of stanning an 'unproblematic' cc and have some sense of control over a cc considering how he was made to apologize on his alt for those largrly harmless 'i dress like a lesbian' jokes he made. Like truly this weirdass gross community they made under his name is such a fucking shame n it sucks. No doubt its turned other ppl away from his streams Like Me

[cnowy]

RANT. (It’s a long one, sorry, I’m a bit of a rambler. Also happy to be proven wrong if that’s the case or to discuss what u think about it. My opinion is not a fact and opinions are never facts)

RPF is peculiar thing in todays fandoms. All the fighting and bickering who’s right or has “the real scoop” about personal lives makes me livid. And I mean those ppl who bring that kind of shit to Twitter or Instagram tagging the actors in question/commenting on their posts. It’s basically harassment. Tumblr, as a social media platform, where fans can interact with each other without directly attacking the actors, is different tho. Here we can safely speculate, share fun theories, video clips and be crazy about it all we want.

My two cents on J2 and Cockles truthing.

Do I ship J2? – No, there’s just no romantic/sexual chemistry between them (I don’t get that vibe). Jared is the straightest man out there and Jensen can only tolerate him at cons or other PR events. (see, I can say this and not attack others, cause IT’S MY OPINION)

Do I ship Cockles? Yes and no. Would consider myself somewhere in the middle when shipping Misha and Jensen. I’m rather fond of their close friendship. Is there anything more to it? Maybe… who knows. There are signs saying perhaps that was the case some time ago. Others believe in polyamory theory while being respectful to their wives. Could they still be together? again, WHO KNOWS? As fans, we can discuss this and not directly shove those speculations in actor’s faces.

A bit of a tangent on shipping real ppl from other fandoms, but it will make sense in the end (I think)

I was never a big 1D fan (knew few popular songs and basic info about them as individuals). Only found out about Larry ship being a thing through my ex who adored the band, especially Harry. We talked for quite awhile and she mentioned how there were less and less public interaction between Harry and Louis. Fans kept annoyingly pushing this narrative about them being together over and over on their social media accounts, so they stopped posting all together. Every single little interaction with each other were seen as codes or subliminal messages that they “are secretly together”. They were basically harassed and bullied over it. It’s crazy if u ask me. Even if it’s true or not ppl have no right to make other to come out.

Another example great example of fans sometimes taking it too far is Septiplier (Markiplier and Jacksepticeye). Knew of Jack and enjoyed his content back in good ol’ Youtube days. I was unfamiliar with this ship until recently. Jack was a guest few years back on a podcast and was asked about this shipping phenomenon. What made me listen up was his view of it. Bromance is fun and the fanart was spectacular according to him. However he was uncomfortable when the insistent shoving reached harassment territory. Jack mentions starting to become more and more weary of any platonic interactions between him and Mark. Cause every time fans would just say “see!, they are definitely fucking each other when so and so hugs one another or looks for more than 2 seconds”. Every public exchange were under scrutiny. So, I’ll ask, how would you feel if someone watched your friendship that closely and made invasive comments about it? Not good, right?

Misha once talked about this too. Cockles ship specifically. Not every single sentence they shutter to each other or joke online is code for “we secretly fuck”. Men, women and every other gender under the sun can be just friends. It’s that simple.

So stop. If you go and harass the actors about real people shipping (or celebrities in general) on their social media – fuck u. Do you want to chase off your idols of social media? I don’t. They give us content, so we can continue speculate more in this safe lil’ corner of Tumblr. If u fight with others – sit down, and take a breather. Attacking various opinions (and mind u, those opinions are speculative at best) is not a way to go. Constructive discussion while being civil IS A WAY TO GO.

And lastly why why why ppl get so offended over opinions as if they’re being attacked personally? Does your (not u specifically, but to those few who take it to another level entirely) whole personality revolve around a ship? All I’m saying it’s not worth of a hill to die on.

Mic’s out.

[likearecordbb]

about your post on the recent discourse...

it's honestly so confusing to me because like,, you say that ppl pointing out how members of this fandom will make neil very stereotypically 'feminine' is reinforcing the idea of 'masculinity' as one thing and 'femininity' as another.... and i get that we should get rid of these labels. but at the same time... the content itself that ppl are criticising (the ones that 'feminize' neil) are already doing just that. that's why they're criticising it.

i can't point out how ppl are reinforcing the idea that a relationship should have a 'man' and a 'woman', without... saying that that's what they're doing. the writer themselves already sees relationships this way and 'masculinity' and 'femininity' as two different distinct things. that's exactly *why* they're writing neil this way while keeping andrew close to canon.

there's nothing wrong with neil being stereotypically 'feminine' of course. but to act like it's somehow misogynistic for me to go to these ppl and be like 'hey, u shouldn't view mlm relationships through the lens of a hetero one! it can be very harmful' is weird to me... *especially* considering these stereotypes that ppl are pushing onto neil come from misogyny themselves. (ppl making neil much much more emotional than he is in canon while keeping andrew very stoic)

idk, like... ur simultaneously saying that we shouldn't view relationships as needing a 'man' and a 'woman'... while defending people who are doing just that and creating content which reinforces just that.

it's one thing to say 'we shouldn't view masculinity and femininity as two distinct and different things!'/'we should get rid of these labels all together cause they're meaningless'... but if i look at the content that u make/consume and it's practically, if not entirely, all andreil conforming to heternormative stereotypes... then i can't help but feel like ur not as detached from the idea of 'masculinity' and 'femininity' as u would like to believe... i trust the ppl who say these ideas are meaningless while not changing the canon characters because they seem to be sticking to their words.

people will just say that they prefer writing andreil is this heternormative way... they'll just say it what they like or what they're most comfortable writing without ever questioning *why* they prefer it this way.

and if they're projecting.. well then, *why* this couple? why pick an mlm couple to project what is often the experience of a cis woman in a relationship? why pick this mlm couple when there are others that do fit the stereotypical heternormative dynamic? idk. like,, u can do this ofc, but ppl can also call u out on ur shit.

there's an undeniable reason that neil is exclusively the one that ppl pick to make more stereotypically 'feminine'. and there's a reason this type of content is also so popular. and it's certainly not wrong to point this out.

You know, I can see all of these points that you're making. For me, the overall issue of this is very complicated. I am also super uncomfortable with the imposition of heteronormative roles onto...well, onto any relationship, regardless of the identities of the people who constitute it. I was raised smack dab in the middle of the gay community by lesbian moms (together 38 years now, jfc, can you imagine??), so that "man/woman" thing was never something that I grew up internalizing or normalizing. I can recognize that this may give me a bit too much of a sense of objectivity.

However, I'm also like...I've been ruined by grad school. The "feminizing" word makes me really uncomfortable because it starts to stray for me into gender essentialism territory. It also seems to foundationally differentiate between "masculine" behaviors and "feminine" behaviors and I just really hate that? Lesbian moms, trans daughter, bi (and late-in-life trying to see where on the ace spectrum I might fall) self, I've just met so many people with so many expressions of gender and sexuality and I just... Idk, I automatically resist anything that feels like it's upholding "masculinity" and "femininity" as real (as in, not constructed) things. And then I also am like, well, I've known SO MANY gay men who behaved in the ways that the discourse constructs as "feminized" and then I start to feel like, what about these men? Are they less 'men' because of it? How would it feel for that man to read these things saying his identity expression was a problem or a bad stereotype? Do I read *Neil Josten* within that context... no, not really. I think Neil has a 'not enough emotional expression' problem way before he has a 'too much emotional expression' problem.

I'll say here what I often say to my students in complex discussions: I don't have answers. I don't think I'm right and anyone else is wrong. I just have complicated thoughts and feelings and concerns about some of the things that sometimes seem to be left uninterrogated.

So, I do 100% get the need to be vigilant about the imposition of a "man" (dominant, emotionally constipated, sexually driven, stoic) role and "woman" (emotional, needy, teary, dependent) role onto relationships with two (or more!) men or women. I would also argue that we need to get rid of that idea in hetero relationships, too, because it's super damaging. I just wish we could find a way to talk about that that didn't feel like it was accepting this idea of femininity as a given? And I definitely agree that it's problematic when the 'bottom' in a relationship is depicted as the one who's soft and silly and weepy. (Have you read TJ Klune's Tales from Verania series? A VERY fun world that does that not at all and it's great). I'm not saying these things are not worth confronting--I'm just really uncomfortable with the way the conversations are often framed around a concept of femininity/feminizing. It feels like shrapnel, I guess? Like, 'ugh stop feminizing Neil he's not weepy and uwu he's a badass' feels inherently to me like it's making femininity and badassery mutually exclusive? Maybe I'm just looking for a caveat or footnote in the argument that acknowledges that that is constructed *for women too*? And is a part of, like, a larger heteronormative patriarchal structure? And not something that we can just all obviously agree is the way the ladies (should?) behave?

One other question I've been dying to ask, though, is: where are these fics? I don't think I've ever read something where Neil is crying over Jack being mean to him or anything. Maybe if I start to see hints of that characterization, I just close the tab and never end up getting to the 'worst' of it?

Although, if what you said earlier about the "content that u make/consume and it's practically, if not entirely, all andreil conforming to heternormative stereotypes..." was referring to me, then... idk what to say to that. I don't think that's what I do. The heteronormative relationship that you're describing isn't one that I enjoy, desire for myself (or anyone else), or have any interest in reproducing.

Does this clarify what I'm trying to say? I guess it's a really long way of saying, in the old insufferable grad school tradition: well, first we have to define our terms. Because I'm not sure we're all coming up with the same thing when we use the word "feminizing" and that probably has a lot to do with why we keep having this exact same conversation over and over and over again.

If I missed any specific point you'd like to pick at in more detail, please let me know--my very sad platonic life partner (who had to put her beloved 15-year-old poodle to sleep yesterday) and her mom are waiting for me to drive them to the stores for a distraction, so I'm feeling a little time pressure.

[rainbowsky]

More on the Fan Fic issue

I have a few more asks about the issue raised the other day, some of which are long and go into detail on the 'wars' that have been happening on Twitter and AO3.

Sorry for grouping these but I wanted to put it all under a cut because these are long, and also in case people don't want to dig into these issues (which would be understandable).

Anonymous 1 asked:

"I am very strongly of the opinion that the BJYX term is still a fandom umbrella term" I agree. Mainly because Bjyx is the most popular. Many antis always say bjyx, and have no idea the others. So sometimes it's easier just to say bjyx instead of explaining all three. I myself more like "who cares as long as they happy." So I enjoy Yizhan in all contexts. Many bxgs I know also like that, mostly ibxgs. I think deep down all bxgs (no matter which position they prefer) just want Yizhan to be happy

Not sure we can be so certain about that last part, Anon (I think for a lot of people GG and DD are just characters in a smutty story they have in their heads), but I agree about the term being popular regardless of the type of fans people are.

From what I can see the BJYX term seems to be used 80-90% umbrella, 10-20% dynamic in both international and c-social media (for every 10 times you see the term used, only one or two of those usages - probably less - are referring to a dynamic). This is my totally unscientific estimation, but I think even 10-20% dynamic is being generous. The number of people who are fixated on a sexual dynamic aren't nearly as large as they'd like to believe.

Anonymous 2 asked:

about the promptfests - i’ve been on twitter since early 2020 and what i’ve noticed is that this influx bjyx-only promptfests started gaining speed once lots of rational voices started leaving the fandom recently either because a) new interests have caught their attention or b) the toxicity of the popular bxg circles on twitter have become too much to handle.

gdgdbaby was usually the organizer of dynamic-inclusive events, and she’s received lots, and lots, and lots of backlash by bxg, sometimes even by accounts with thousands followers, for using bjyx as a catch-all term. and as her interest in yizhan has since waned—hopefully for reasons unrelated to fandom toxicity—many of the people who were attracted to the welcoming environment she created distanced themselves as well.

zsww/lsfy fans have become an outnumbered circle who try their best to create exclusive events to avoid the “is bjyx a catch-all term” discourse, but never seem to gain as much traction as gdgdbaby (who has a sizeable following) or those who host bjyx-only events (who also have sizeable followings).

meanwhile the dynamic war has only become more and more hostile and bjyx is clearly the more populated group… ao3 is simply a battlegrounds, if i may dramatize the situation a little for the sake of humor, and the promptfests are a reaction to this irritating t/b discourse that has made bxg twitter completely inhospitable for me…and lots of other fans too.

(i’ve also noticed a huge reinforcement as of recently where ppl will call gg laopo, a milf, an omega, etc even outside of rpf (i.e. posting pictures of him at events and saying he looks pregnant or he’s going into heat) and it’s just… uncomfortable.)

(also please note i have a biased account of all of this drama bc many of my friends were harassed over it, and anyone who disagrees with my take may feel free to interject.)

I took the liberty of adding paragraph breaks because they are pretty important for some readers, particularly ND readers like me.

It's sad to hear how fucked up everything has become, but I'm not even remotely surprised. Toxicity leads to toxicity, and the whole idea of dividing up a RP fandom by sex position was misguided from the outset - no matter why it was done or how good the intentions might have been.

And yes, like I said, these people aren't just framing things this way for fan fic. This is how they talk about IRL GGDD.

I had written a lengthy essay here about homophobia in the fandom but deleted it all. Perhaps I'll post it separately at some later point. Suffice it to say that this stuff creates a climate that's often hostile for queer people. So much of it is deeply homophobic, whether people are aware of it or not.

It's really sad to hear about gdgdbaby being mistreated in any way. Anyone who steps up and sticks their neck out to help organize and coordinate activities that benefit a broader group of people should be celebrated and supported, not run out of town by an angry mob.

I've read some of her stories and even have one or two on my rec list. And here's someone who is not only writing good works, but also supporting others to write more good works. Such a shame.

Anonymous 3 asked:

Hello Mr. RBS! I think I can chime in a bit about the fanfic topic as I’ve watched this all unravel on twitter (where a majority of authors/readers are). I apologize if this gets long but it’s been something that’s also been on my mind.

I want to preface this by saying that I’m not a fan of the distinctions of dynamics as, like you said, the supposed line between real life and fanfic is long gone, so I’m not trying to be biased against one group over another.

Short answer to the question of, “is this retaliation?” : I do believe it is. (From here onwards I’ll be using bjyx as the dynamic term just for the ease of simplicity.) To understand why, I’ll have to explain with a bit of background info. On twitter, I’d say that there’s a quite large divide between bjyx and zsww/lsfy. That itself isn’t really a problem because people are free to like what they like and associate with whoever.

However there is a big problem where bjyx people are not just bjyx but also anti-zsww/lsfy. To the point where I’ve seen people say that they feel physically ill when they accidentally read zsww. I don’t think this type of behavior should exist in any dynamic bc in the end GGDD are real people with a real relationship behind this content and it’s just a gross fetishization at that point.

With all this happening, zsww/lsfy people have gotten more outspoken on how GG is often portrayed in those types of scenarios, mainly the over-feminization of him, bc it’s not just done in the context of fanfic but regular discussion of GGDD at this point. This tension between the dynamics kind of boiled over when the pregnant xz fest was announced, as you can take a guess at how that went over with zsww/lsfy people. lol.

But around that same time, another zsww/lsfy event was announced (I’m not sure if it’s the one anon was talking about) but the creator of the event suddenly got a ton of backlash for excluding bjyx, with the reasoning that bjyx is technically a part of lsfy. But the event was done to highlight zsww/lsfy (as all specific events are) bc the community and content for these dynamics are much less than bjyx.

Which is how we come back to the starting point of, is all this recent bjyx stuff retaliatory. I believe so bc the events (preg fest, dark event) are very specific prompts that target exactly what zsww/lsfy people have been outspoken against.

As to the point anon made about trying to drown out the tags, keep in mind that zsww/lsfy content is very minimal compared to bjyx and has only just recently started to gain more traction. I think most people would love to just peacefully exist in their own circles but I don’t see this problem between dynamics disappearing anytime soon.

Like I said with the above Anon, I've added paragraph breaks for ND readers.

What a mess.

I have absolutely nothing useful to say here about the fandom on AO3 and how it's managed by community members, but I do think it's unfortunate that people choose to be war-like rather than make space for diverse voices, and I think it's a real shame that some people have been essentially run out of the fandom because of this garbage.

Thanks for giving some context for how/why the major shift in tone of fan fic lately. I had no idea any of this was going on.

I urge people to work hard to give space for all voices and perspectives, and not just the ones they favor. I'd also urge people to reflect on how their thoughts, behavior and actions in the fandom might affect queer people in the fandom.

As always, we have no control over what other people do, say or think. All we have any control over is how we respond to what other people do, say or think. Hopefully we'll chose the path of peace and try to avoid fan wars or fights that only ruin the experience for everyone.

I guess one thing I'd ask any of the Anons who have written me about this issue - or anyone who has thoughts about it - is, what can we as readers/fans who care about diversity of voices and perspectives do to support that here and on AO3, without getting involved in any kind of war?

[wasflypaw]

no, i definitely don't follow you. someone sent me a screenshot of the post right before i sent the ask. we've never interacted outside of this since your blog was one of the first i blocked. i don't remember the post specifically, but it was in the main fandom tag for technoblade and caused a bad attack. i'm glad that you're no longer main tagging those things. people in this fandom need to be more respectful.

Hi, gonna address this in a few points. I might go off on a tangent bc I got a lot to say and your ask has given me the opportunity to speak about them

1. I'm genuinely sorry you had a panic attack over something I posted and I dont mind you blocking me if something I posted caused you harm - in fact, I encourage it. I've blocked a lot of people who've posted things that have made me uncomfortable so I'd be a hypocrite to get upset over that

2. I've had a look and I dont see any negative posts of mine in the main Technoblade tag? Just posts about his content and fanart so if I were to find/edit/take down the post I'd have no clue what to look for

3. I was pretty c!Techno critical back when I started this blog and it was mainly to do w his fans attacking cc!Tommy and his fans that caused me to have a negative reaction to c!Techno himself. I'm a Lot more sympathetic towards his character now, while I dont post about him often anymore. It's the same with my feelings towards c!Dream - I see a post that invokes negative feelings and it just ends up triggering my RSD. A Lot of my critical posts are posted during Bad Times or breakdowns but I'm working on this - I've blocked any post and blog that have made me feel this way and I've been feeling Much better the last few days. This random is a first for me - where people group themselves into which characters they enjoy and argue w other groups and I get,,, carried away sometimes. I've made an entirely new blog for just Discourse Free Happy Things and have been focusing more on stuff that makes me happy now so I think I'm getting a bit better. Nothing against the people posting said things that I've reacted negatively to, its absolutely not their fault for my reactions and they're not ppl I personally dislike (I cant know or dislike you personally from what DSMP opinions you have, your opinions do not imply or effect your IRL morality, said opinions just make me uncomfortable and that's about it)

4. I'm not sure how I feel about people sending you my boundary post two minutes after I posted it? The only reason I can assume is they're sharing to mock me or talk about me behind my back and I mean this genuinely, if you do that hardblock me. My blog is a space for me and people who enjoy my posts - I dont feel comfortable with hate follows. I may be jumping to conclusions but being told "someone sent me your boundary list after you posted it" while in said post I mention my Severe Anxiety is not a good combination. Alongside the person who is purposefully private quote tweeting my Twitter posts after I've repeatedly said not to and it's a boundary and I have "NO PQRTs" in my username,,,,,, genuinely stuff like this is making me consider shutting down my blog and my twitter account and starting anew somewhere else. Please if you dislike me or my posts just dont look/block me, I'm begging at this point

[masqueradingmoon]

hey a while back you said you had a lot of thoughts on how non-jewish white arthurian fans can better be allies to jewish ppl. with the post i just reblogged i thought it was important to also discuss antisemitism in both medieval literature and the use of arthurian narratives in the present day. this is an invitation to say everything you want about a) antisemitism & arthuriana, and b) how white culturally christian fans can create a better environment for jewish fans!!

oh thank you for bringing this up! I think in general I do a lot of thinking about these things what with how d&d plays into the medieval aesthetic as well, and so I think up similar alleys when i think about like, how to make that more accommodating as well. Obviously it’s not 1:1 but... call it listing my credentials before I go on a big rant about making minority groups welcome in fan spaces for media that is also largely dominated by fans who are bigoted. 

Anyway, I’m going to skip the history lesson for this post, if you need to learn about the treatment of jewish people in medieval times you can look it up. I think it’s pretty clear that these stories at their core, if not every text that gets commonly talked about, are not welcoming to jewish people. Or... anyone who isn’t christian. It was the dominant religion in Europe for pretty much all of the texts we read, and in its origins, arthurian lit revolves around the ideals of chivalry, yes, but also the ideals of spreading christianity, and a lot of christian symbolism. So far that hasn’t been anything I saw discussed before or after King Artus was circulating in our little corner of the fandom, only within that little pocket, which isn’t a call out, necessarily, more a heads up. I think one of the most insidious things about antisemitism is that more than other forms of bigotry it feeds on not being noticed and acknowledged, especially when it crops up in media. One of the most important things to do is call it out and acknowledge it, which is uncomfortable, but there is a lot of uncomfortable stuff in these texts that i’ve seen handled pretty well so far. 

It is really hard to take back the medieval aesthetic from white supremacists, which I feel like is true of a lot of things, ancient roman aesthetics for example. It gets co-opted and warped over time, so the characters become less and less what they originally were, which wasn’t even always great, and slowly morph into beautiful, white paragons intended to carry out the white, christian way of life and morals. We forget sometimes to take these things in context, because as fun as it is for Priamus to join the knights for Gay Reasons, in the actual story, that plot point is... incredibly iffy. And because of that I think it’s important to think about who is writing what we’re reading, and who is writing the analysis that we’re reading, and how does that affect how they see the characters and stories and explain them to other people? It isn’t that you can’t separate arthurian literature from white supremacists and anti-semitism, but it takes an active effort and curation of what you’re reading and what you’re posting about it. 

And lastly, regarding making jews feel welcome in your spaces, that depends entirely on the content that you’re putting out. There are a few red flags that I could call out in other fandoms that I haven’t seen here yet, but as a general list of things to avoid, of which i may or may not have seen specific things: drawing certain human characters with inhuman features such as greenish skin, sharp teeth, pointed ears and noses, and matted or frizzy hair (multiple at once, not individually), writing characters with these features or antisemitic traits, doing this to villains in particular. I only say this up front instead of starting with the “diversity, diversity!” point because “diversity” for jews often means being written as jewish through a clearly goyishe lens, where there is a defined set of personality traits and appearance for what a jew can be. That said, diversity diversity! Include jews in your reincarnation aus, make your heroes jewish in your fanfic, clear away the heavy christian symbolism and make room for other religious and cultural imagery and themes (respectfully). You can always look up any of this stuff if you’re unclear. And honestly, I’m one of the lucky minorities who doesn’t so much mind fielding questions about how best to include us (though like, about complicated things, not what is considered kosher) so... I’m willing to answer questions if people need to reach out and get help with the specifics of some of the stuff that I only mentioned briefly in this post.  Okay, that about covers it for now, I hope all this helps field some conversation, because the fandom has been sorely missing it. And to my lovely followers who have no idea what’s going on but are interested, I’ll be reblogging the post mentioned in the ask. It has a lot more detailed information and analysis on this subject from a more general lens, so it’s worth a read as well if you’re going through the trouble of reading this whole post. 

[justlightlysedated]

20 Questions

20 questions, writer's edition, I was tagged by @lambourngb 😊❤❤

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

71! 70 for roswell and one for vagrant queen

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

468, 583!!

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

not entirely sure tbh, but let's count now:

timkon, bandom, glee, specifically pukurt, but some other ships too, merlin, doctor who, torchwood, teen wolf, agents of shield, runaways, the old guard, vagrant queen, and obviously, roswell new mexico

i think there might be more, but i don’t remember rn

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

the cost of greatness, which i cowrote with marlo

a cure i know that soothes the soul (does so impossibly), the first pwp i wrote for this fandom lol

the person that you’d take a bullet for is behind the trigger, which i wrote for marlo

for better or for worse (til death do us part), which i also cowrote with marlo lol

it might be your wound but they’re my sutures, which i also wrote for marlo

so the pattern im sensing here is that my most popular fics were written with/for marlo which sounds about right lol

5. What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

i am not sure tbh, i write some pretty angsty one shots and longer fics, but i TRY to at least give a slightly hopeful ending, tho now that i’m thinking about it, i think the angstiest thing i’ve written was that prompt fill based on the song, for island fires and family, i remember SOBBING the entire time that i wrote it (there is miluca in that one), but ALSO there is the fic i wrote in reaction to the season one finale, which also made me cry, which was called, we both know how this story ends

6. What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

once again i’m not sure, like i said before, i try to give my fics hopeful endings if they’re really angsty, and i love me some hurt/comfort, but i’m not entirely known for writing happy, fluffy fics, tho i do TRY sometimes for certain people

7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you've written?

yes!! i do love me some crossovers, and i guess i would have to say the malex, sort of doctor who au, i’m technically still writing for tove

8. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes??? but i’m not sure if i could classify it, like i’ll write pretty much anything within reason and if it doesn’t squick me out

9. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

okay, so like don’t hate me, but no, i rarely, if ever respond to comments, i just don’t know what to say at all, like i’m the type of person that really wants every single message to be unique and special, but there are only so many ways to thank someone for reading your fic, so i just tend to post things and then thank everyone for reading afterwards, if there is someone that shows up often on my notifications, or if someone asks me a specific question pertaining to the story, then i will answer, i also answer back if i wrote the fic for someone and they left a comment, and if i’m sent an ask on here about something that i wrote, but i am simultaneously the world's most shy and confident person ever, when it comes to my writing, so i’m so sorry

this doesnt mean that i dont appreciate every comment that i get because i really do, im just super shy and awkward and i may write good-ish, but i do NOT have the same way with words in person

10. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

not really?? if i have i don’t remember it, usually i’m the one who talks the worse about my own writing

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes, the only kurtbastian fic i’ve ever written was translated into russian

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yep!! as y’all probably saw from my top five fics up there somewhere, marlo @bestillmyslashyheart is basically my fic writing soulmate, we just really click when it comes to writing

14. What's your all time favourite ship? to write for?

atm it’s malex, which is more than obvious, BUT before they hijacked my brain and made their home within my neurons, it was skimmons!!! i wrote fic for them for YEARS, even after i stopped watching aos

15. What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, i’m just gonna talk about fics that i’ve posted and haven’t updated and not any of the hundreds of wips that have never seen the light of day, my original witch au tbh, i just, roswell made maria and isobel somehow related, and just made me really uncomfortable with the ship, which is the main reason that i’m not gonna finish the fic if i’m being perfectly honest, there is ALSO that au i had where michael’s daughter from the future comes back to the past and she had been raised by alex, because of reasons that are petty, probably my space opera au as well, and only because i just want to write other things MORE

16. What are your writing strengths?

i think i’m good at describing things, especially kisses, i LOVE writing kisses, it’s one of my favorite things, that and my fight scenes are two of the things i pride myself the most on

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

dialogue, sometimes i feel the characters are ridiculously out of character, but then i don’t care because sometimes in canon characters are also ridiculously out of characters, also describing things, because sometimes i just feel like scenes don’t flow right, i am definitely a comma whore, and use dashes and hyphens in places they definitely shouldn’t be used, run-on sentences are my best friends, also english isn't my first language, so, sometimes the way i phrase things just come out wrong

18. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

tbh completely honest, i follow the nora sakavic method where you just write the dialogue in english like, “hey there love,” they said in perfect french, and i only break this rule if i actually know the language because just translating straight from english always makes things sound stilted and weird

19. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

dc comics, i wrote several timkon fics which i posted on livejournal

20. What's your favourite fic you've written?

oh, i know that love is all about the wind, how it can hold me up and kill me in the end (still i loved it), no specific reason why, i just love it with my entire heart!!

and that's it!! im not gonna tag anyone cause I saw that most ppl were already tagged, but if you want to do this just say that I tagged you!!

[thattimdrakeguy]

Why, uh, do ppl hate Tim so much? I just fell down a hole of anti tim and I can’t find a..valid reason for the hate besides that fact tht hes rich and white?

From my experience it’s one of those things where Tim has antagonistic relationships with other Bat-Family members like Damian, Jason, and even partially Steph. So they just crap on Tim, because it’ll make their favs look better.

Like that’s genuinely been the main reason I see, and they use the fact he’s rich and white to make it seem like it’s a social justice thing, even though in the end it really isn’t.

I sort of rant for the rest of the post going in more detail, and mentioning things I’ve been shown, and why I think a lot of it is dumb, but basically it’s just people being petty and insecure, and being unable to handle things in any other way than childishly.

For some Jason fans I’ve seen them talk about how much they hate Tim because they replaced the poor kid with a rich kid, but I’m really freaking poor myself. Obviously I’m not homeless, but there was a time in my life where I slept on the floor, and later on after I did have a bed my bed room had a hole in the floor. But, they’re just looking too deep into stuff just to find a problem anywhere they can.

I’ve also seen some say Tim bullied his way into being Robin after the poor kid died. When 1) that isn’t even an accurate description of what happened and 2) they’re obviously just trying to word it the worst way possible, because they’re pretty freaking childish.

Damian fans try to make Tim and his fans out to be racist cause Tim doesn’t like Damian, when that’s actually because Damian got so close to killing Tim I’m pretty sure Tim actually did nearly die from bleeding out. I think also because Tim once said “what about his biology” when referring to Damian, when Tim wasn’t referring to his race, he was referring to how he’s related to criminals and Damian literally had his biology messed with to make him a fierce warrior and a good body for Ra’s.

Steph fans also try to make Tim and his fans out to be sexist. But their reasoning is really weak, because it’s literally just boiled down to Tim being mean to Steph sometimes, but it’s not like that’s cause of her gender for that to make sense. It’s because in context she is an untrained citizens constantly putting herself and potentially others in-danger without any training to feel safe with her constantly being out there. Plus she flirted with him so much to the point it made him uncomfortable and fit the literal definition of sexual harassment.

And they always do that thing where they gotta make their favs sound better, and Tim sound worse. Which admittedly Tim fans do the same thing, but I’m not really here to pick a side. I’m just here pointing out how freaking annoying fandoms can be, because ultimately I don’t really care what fandom does it. At the moment though I can confidently say, that other fandoms are doing it a lot more than Tim ones lately, because I’m in the Tim tags at least twice a day most days and I’ve barely seen it lately.

It’s kind of a thing to project a lot of stuff on the Tim fandom for the same faux-social-justice kind of jargon they try to do. When you see it from a view like mine, where I’m not on any side of any fandom, even if I am a Tim fan (cause I never really been into deep fandom stuff), it just comes off as hypocritical frankly.

(If you want to hear some dumb things some Tim fans do to even it up, they make him the most frail, emo, emotionally unstable kid ever sometimes. They can focus way too much on making him sympathetic (but even then, literally every fandom does that, but the Tim fandom always does it in a very notable depressing way). They also focus so much on coffee and practically act like he’s all pilled up on anti-depressants he just acts weird that it just seems obsessive and very out of character.)

Like as some examples they’ll bring up how Tim doesn’t trust Damian and put him on a list of potential threats. But Damian literally nearly caused Tim’s death, nearly caused it again in the same story, and at the end it’s shown that Damian isn’t on there because Tim considers him a villain, it’s because he has potential to be dangerous. Wonder Woman and Red Tornado are also on the same list.

To me, I just look at that story as ridiculous, because Damian isn’t dumb, and Tim literally spoke against contingency plan stuff before. Damian’s going to need more than to be on a vague list as a potential threat, especially when he’s visibly on the hero side of it. Damian’s not that thinned skin. He’s got a temper, and obviously really doesn’t like Tim, but even when he felt Tim was insulting him or being patronizing to him before he didn’t try to kill him then immediately. He tried to kill him because he thought that’s what he was supposed to do to earn his place beside his father.

The story’s just dumb in-general.

And then they pull out the New 52 story where Tim is just being a dick to Damian for no good reason, but it’s the same kind of thing. Tim was never that much of a dick without being provoked. The only time I think Tim started a fight was in Red Robin where he was on pills that messed with his mental state, and again had everyone out of character regardless. Because 1) Dick wouldn’t just give away Robin from Tim, because he knows better than that. 2) Damian acts like he’s happy his dad is dead and just acts like a generic child and not even like Damian. And 3) I legitimately can’t see Tim just hitting a kid, even Damian, unless a fight already breaks out.

For Steph fans they point out how Tim is passive aggressive to her, constantly doesn’t want her to be Spoiler, and yada yada. Probably because her Batgirl run portrayed that as being mentally scarring to Steph. Even though one of the panels they chose of Tim being upset and not wanting her to be Spoiler, was after Steph caused Tim to be disfigured and on the pills that messed with his mental state to begin with. Which inadvertedly just makes her look self-centered and narcissistic. But again, I don’t even consider that in-character, because 1) I don’t buy that Steph would listen to Batman especially when it puts Tim in danger, because she never gave a crap about what Batman said till they needed to villainize her before she died. 2) Steph can be arrogant and self-centered, she has it in her, but she wouldn’t ever be that self-centered, to the point she just looks narcissistic. 3) I’m pretty sure at the actual time it happened, Steph is shown being aware she messed up. 4) Steph never cared what others thought. She trespassed on other people’s property to party. She’s a very confident person the majority of the time. Batman tells her to knock it off, she might as well flip him the bird because she just finds him more annoying than anything else. It’s literally in her origin that she doesn’t even like Batman.

There’s also the context for in the 90s when Tim first started doing it. Steph was portrayed as a reckless citizen that could potentially get herself and others into harm because she didn’t know what she was doing, and didn’t have the highest morals. That’s not anything any of the bats would encourage. If Tim was extra passive aggressive, he’s a literal thirteen to fifteen year old boy during that time, no duh he’s going to be immature. That still isn’t a sexism thing. Steph may had saved him twice, but that wasn’t portrayed even in-story as a sign she can handle it like a pro. It was always portrayed as “thank goodness she was with Tim at that time, and knew where he was to save him”. Not to say she was completely unskilled, because I’m not taking that far, but just speaking in generalizations.

She was originally added into Robin to be a very specific foil to Tim, and be a general pain in his side. That was their dynamic. If that makes it seem weird that they eventually had them date then I agree.

And at the same time for both of their characters they also ignore what the character they’re trying to defend has done, because Damian literally nearly killed Tim. They act like Tim should just get over it, because Damian was a kid in a cult, but that explains why Damian did it, it doesn’t excuse it. When something like that happens the person who was nearly killed is probably going to be traumatized (rather or not Tim was can be argued, I’m not saying he was or wasn’t), and not ever trust the person. Like that is the natural and most accurate response for it.

It’s just villainizing for the sake of being petty.

With Steph they ignore the fact she essentially sexually harassed Tim all the time and straight up emotionally abused him for an arc. Which her fans hate to hear, but that is stuff that happened. It was written by her creator. I don’t really care if Tim took her costume away or kissed her first, because I’m aware, and I know the contexts, and it doesn’t take away from what she’s done, because that’s not how that works. They also ignore she caused Tim to be disfigured by saying she was just doing what Batman said. But at that point she was also an adult, and would know better.

Like Steph can be reckless, that’s part of her character, but she isn’t an idiot.

In the end, from what all I’ve seen, it’s literally just fandom pettiness. There’s a lot of fans out there that act childish, treat people like idiots, blatantly lie about things, or exaggerate stuff.

It’s all very dumb, but I find it hard to take serious, because if they can’t acknowledge what their own favs have actually done, it just comes across like they genuinely don’t like the character and can’t admit it. They prefer to stay in their candy land so they gaslit others instead.

For me it’s as easy as paying attention to the story, seeing the contexts, and a lot of the time it’s not even a thing that’s in-character for any of the characters involved, or at least the very least not nearly as serious as they treat it.

Especially for around the past 15 or more years or so. By then the care in making everything is crafted and makes sense went down the drain so it’s often that a story doesn’t even make sense to begin with.

They think fandom is about making everyone else look bad apparently, or at least they sure act like it.

Like it’s comics. I think the fandom in-general that gets so worked up over stuff needs to relax, deattach yourself to look at it from the grander view, and calm down over it. Because things aren’t always what they seem. People try to convince themselves of so much stuff, or bully others for so much stuff, and it’s all so petty and unhealthy.

My personal philosophy in the fandom to avoid any toxic behavior is to just keep it real. I don’t lie to myself, I give everything the same standard, I definitely don’t bully or gaslit anyone, I don’t treat my favorite like they’re a real dang person either, and I look at it all like how it is, fiction.

It’s the reason why I get upset at writing and not fictional characters. I don’t ultimately care when a character does a bad thing, unless it’s out of character. To me the only thing I get upset with is the writing, because it’s the only thing that’s real.

Don’t be obsessed, and keep the peace essentially.

[shijiujun]

this is very random but i’m feeling kind of frustrated/confused now and i truly regard you as fandom jiejie so i would like to rant a bit and seek your advice(?) recently, i found out that i got blocked by another tumblr that’s quite popular in the cql fandom for creating gifs etc. i don’t know who the person is and have never interacted with the blog; i only found out because i couldn’t reblog the person’s post (which i saw on my feed because someone i followed reblogged it). i was curious why but i realized that the person is probably against mxtx/danmei books etc, which i sometimes post about, for i guess homophobic/fetishizing reasons? but i’ve never followed or interacted so i’m really not sure why i got “noticed” like that. anyway, like i respect the person’s choices and rights to block people, but i haven’t been in the fandom for long and basically never encountered something like this before, so i’m slightly bothered by it. i’m guessing it’s quite common and i know i should probably just ignore/avoid the person (since they blocked me anyway) but i’m too easily affected. how do you usually deal with people like that? thank you.

oh oh hi! hahaha damn am i fandom jiejie?!?!?! sarah is my fandom jiejie ;-; 

anyway oomph sorry you found out about the block from that specific person and are feeling terrible about it! not easy to realize you’re blocked by someone

ehhh actually there can be a few reasons why ppl block i mean in general:

1. it could be an accident, tumblr fucks up q regularly

2. users have beef against each other (unavoidable, i mean we’re placing a lot of opinionated ppl squeezed into a room)

3. you just dont wanna see their stuff or opinions on your blog - i mean this is very understandable, whether out of like genuine like damn this is really not content i wanna see or i really hate the subject matter - both ways go and unfortunately-

unfortunately, it’s all part and parcel of being on social media and on an online space! i know this is hard to hear but everyone escapes to their blogs or accounts right and especially on tumblr where everything is slightly more curated, people create their blogs and create content for mostly themselves first - and we all do things to make sure our dashes stay the way we want them to look 

i for one use the block button very liberally - sometimes just because i disagree with someone and feel that there is just no way i can see their further posts on the matter, or you know, when i get triggered with pet peeves hahahaa sadly i am that kind of person XD i come onto my blog to be happy, and if anything makes me the slightest bit annoyed/uncomfortable, i don’t feel guilty at all about using the button 

i’ve also blocked for my own sanity for e.g. if a blog i see keeps reblogging the same post in the span of 48 hours (talking about like more than five times, and i’m personally totally okay if it’s a timezone reblog for fics or psas or infos!) for notes i mean, their blog, they can do whatever they want and i am in no place to judge, but it made me really competitive and i felt like it was really toxic to keep staring at notes so i blocked for my own sake because i have zero impulse control

and sometimes it’s personal, sometimes it’s not! in your case i think it may help? idk, because these things are stressful and i don’t deal well with like anger HAHAHAHA:

1. don’t take it personally and don’t think too much about it or about why or what you posted that could have made them block you - this blog is for you. and the ppl who follow you in a sense, so if anyone is unhappy that’s on them to block etc. - and don’t think about you getting ‘noticed’, posts turn up in searches all the time as well and it could just have been a particular post 

2. blocking in my opinion is so much better than the user coming to fight with you via anon or rallying other ppl to bully you for your posts online - trust me, this gets ugly, and if it ever happens you’ll wish they used the block button instead - we should be happy there’s a block button! in fact i’d like a mute button like on twitter - i like this blog but this blog’s posts for now idw to see but i still like their overall stuff just not during this period when this bij is gg mad over shan he ling (i’m talking about others when thinking about me btw HAHAHAHA) - blocking is like “i reject you but politely tyvm” rather than “here’s why i rejected you and you must hear all the reasons and i will add more once you fight back”

yep, not pleasant at all

*also gonna take the opportunity to remind peeps to pls block me if your other alternative is to sneak into my ask box for a fight or write a vague personal post hating on me tyvm, 慢走不送*

3. we can’t please everybody!!! idk either ppl ignore me, or at least half of them may have blocked me - i dont blame em hahahaa i do get into ask fights when anons especially come into my ask box looking for one HAHAHA - i mean, i use the block, can’t expect others not to, but just have to get used to ppl just blocking i think!

4. of course if a blog i follow and like blocked me i’d definitely be sad but... what can you or i do? 

5. all content is fine as long as it’s made with thought i feel - all opinions are good as long as they are made with thought and also you and i for that matter are able to stand behind it when someone comes knocking so like obviously if something hurtful is said, then the following angry responses may be expected, but also if you’ve put thought into your posts (i don’t mean like thought THOUGHT but more like when u post anything that can be controversial for e.g. or could potentially be hurtful it’s always good to kind of adjust a little before posting anything) then you should just stand behind your own posts and be who you are online

6. it’s too much to speculate on why ppl do anything, just blog and be happy :DDD