#it's not funny otherwise. and there's no point if it's not funny.

[luveline]

JADE I LOVE SINGLE MOM READER AND STEVE! 😭 If requests are open, could we see steve taking the two of them on a date? And lil man wants to hold steves hand but he’s a little shy to ask?

If requests are closed this is just a compliment for you 😘

thank u for requesting <3 mom!reader, 1k

This is far more nerve wracking than previous dates, Steve will admit. He’s never had to buy a girl two bouquets, either. It’s expensive. Probably worth it. 

Steve leans against the doorframe, nervous and attempting to look the opposite. His knock was met with a called, “Coming, Steve!” and little else. 

He’s wondering if he’s the victim of a mean prank when you finally open the door. 

“Hi!” you greet, letting your mini me stumble out of the door before you. “Noah, say hi, baby.”

Noah looks up at Steve, smiles, and carries on down the steps. 

“Hey, bud,” he says with a knowing laugh. “Hi, you,” he adds, pressing a quick kiss to your cheek. 

“Are those for us? Noah, come back! Come back, Steve has a present for you.” 

The flowers he’d bought for Noah are small and maybe ridiculous, he doesn’t know. Noah’s a little boy, and he’s sure some parents might give Steve a funny look for it, but it hadn’t felt weird in the moment. You don't find it weird, clearly —you’re beckoning Noah back to your legs with a smile that practically sparkles, grabbing him up, and showing him the flowers. There’s something startled about you as you point to the smaller bouquet and say, “Oh, babe, look what Steve got for you. Aren’t they pretty? Where are we gonna put them?” 

“You guys look nice, huh? That’s a gift for me, so, I figure, flowers,” he says, not awkward but definitely not smooth. 

“Thank you, Steve.” 

You take Noah’s bouquet and press it into his hands. “Say thank you,” you whisper nicely. 

“Thank you,” Noah says. 

Steve meets his eyes with a smile gentle as yours. “You’re welcome.” 

“Would you wanna hold him?” you ask. “I’ll take the flowers inside. He’ll run down into the street otherwise, and if I take him back in he’ll want me to take off his shoes.” 

Steve doesn’t know what he wants. He really likes your son and he doesn’t have any qualms in helping, but he’s terrified of dropping him, or holding him wrong and hurting him, or making him cry being too close. He doesn’t want you to know that he’s scared of anything, so he shuffles your flowers into one arm and opens the other for Noah, who goes willingly. Steve’s surprised at how easily you move him, then again when Noah surrenders his flowers in the name of hugging Steve’s neck. 

You laugh. Your smile makes him smile, and with the colours of the flowers glowing under your neck, you’re something from a movie. “Aw, babe, are you giving Steve a hug? You’re so nice! You’re lovely.” 

“We’re best friends,” Steve says. 

“We’re best friends,” you say. Best friends seems to be mom code for dating. “You’re just buddies. Don’t get it messed up, Harrington, I’m his favourite.” 

You head back inside. Steve holds Noah close, realising with some awe that even though Noah’s a toddler, his back is barely bigger than Steve’s arm where it’s resting. He’s not heavy. He barely weighs anything at all when he sits like this with his legs either side of Steve’s ribs. 

“Are you ready for our day out?” Steve asks him. “We’re gonna go rollerblading. Did mommy tell you? It’s a toddler disco, and then we’re gonna have pizza. Mom says you love pizza.” 

“Yeah, an’ ‘ronis.” 

“Yeah?” Steve asks, thrilled to be understood and to understand what he’s saying. “I’m gonna get you a huge pepperoni pizza, extra pepperoni. And mommy said you’re pretty good on your little rollerblades. That’s so cool.” 

Noah maybe doesn’t get the last part, but it doesn’t matter. Steve’s tone is making him smile, and he hugs Steve’s neck with a surprising ferociousness. 

“What did you say to him?” you ask, stepping back out of the door, closing it behind you. “He’s gone shy.” 

“I just told him I was gonna buy him a pizza!” Splteve defends. 

“No, it’s a good thing. It just means he’s feeling loved up,” you say, scratching the nape of Noah’s neck. 

“Oh. Good. That’s great.” 

You nod knowingly. “Pretty great. My two best guys getting along.” 

“I’m a best guy?” Steve asks.

You slot yourself into his side with a low lying confidence that has his heart like a hammer in his chest. “Best guy,” you confirm.

You’re unafraid when it comes to him, you have been since you met. You flirt, hug, even kiss without hesitation. And now Noah’s clinging to Steve like he’s known him for months, it’s nice. It’s pretty much everything he’s ever wanted, or the precipice of it, and he’s not going to get ahead of himself but he’s just happy to be liked without any holding back. 

“Can I kiss you?” he asks, quietly but not shyly. 

You pout obligingly, chin up, eyes shutting in total trust. Steve holds Noah away from you rather than have everybody smash their faces together and ducks down for a quick kiss that turns into two, the second of which is soft, and an attempt to show you what he’s feeling without saying it. 

You pull away but bring your hand to his hair, threading your fingertips into the shorter strands by his ear. He’d like to think you’re saying the same thing he was. 

“Mommy,” Noah says. 

“Yeah, bub?” you ask, distracted where you brush Steve’s hair down. 

“Kiss too?” 

You lay your gaze on him with mirth. “Yes! Pucker up, Noah. Gonna give you the biggest one, and then we’re gonna have to get in the car before we miss toddler skate. Ready?” 

You kiss him and tickle his tummy. Steve bites back a cheesy, awful grin. Two new best friends is a sweet deal. 

[gallusrostromegalus]

AEIWAM canon fun fact for no reason: Zaraki Kenpachi 100% fully believes in, and practices, tarot reading.

The deck he's using is, of course, completely sideways of a conventional tarot. There are no suits, not properly faces, as the deck is entirely comprised of Cards* that he picked up at some point and felt a connect with.

The Garbage Tarot is accurate to the point of violence, will happily tell people about the present or past but gets huffy and sarcastic if you try to prognosticate too much or too specifically. It will never tell anyone how they will die but will practically spell the name and address of who they're going to marry. Or murder. Sometimes both. You get to figure that part out, asshole.

It also seems to work only for Zaraki- even touching the deck can lead to disaster, at least according to Renji who tried to use it once and immediately had the worst run of luck of his life for a week that culminated in a monkey attack and having to get the rabies shots.

Despite its accuracy and the fact it shares Zaraki's peculiar sense of humor, he doesn't use it often. "I ask it when it's an emergency or it tells me it's got news. Otherwise, it's resting. What would happen if you kick in my door in the middle of the night to ask me about your love life? I'd fuckin' castrate you, that's what. Leave it."

* "Cards" here meaning "approximately 3x5 inch flat rectangle-ish objects with two different sides that can be shuffled. This includes, but is not limited to: beer mats he scribbled important names and addresses on, Smutty polaroids he found in the back of a desk drawer, a Christmas card, a compact mirror, laminated natural objects like flowers and snakeskin, swathes of fabric, tile, the checkout cards from Library copies of famous literature, postcards, business cards, academic flash cards, the very small menu of a seafood restaurant, and a handful or normal playing and tarot cards just to be funny.

It makes a horrible noise when shuffled.

Mayuri despises it, calling it superstitious bullshit and refusing Zaraki's offer to do a reading before an important project. Mayuri flounced from the building in disgust, and as soon as he set a toe outside, he was strick by lightning.

Unohana was disappointed that he'd believe in cartomancy at first but she's kept careful notes on the results of the draws and how things turn out and there's always an element of confirmation bias but she's slightly alarmed that it may actually work. To be fair, that would only be the fourth or fifth most improbable thing about Zaraki.

[crumblinggothicarchitecture]

I read your fake smart-girl coded Taylor Swift post. Ended up on my feed because it was tagged philosophy. It was long enough that I caught a few words and actually read it. Honestly thought it was satire until I read your answers to other people.

I do not care about TS. But I do care about philosophy. You have a degree in it ? Funny, I have one too. You've read Aristotle ? I did too. But did you read though ? Did you really get into philosophy, and heard what the people you, I'm sure, can quote really well, actually said ? Because what it looks like, is that you got a degree in philosophy, but did not get philosophy at all. What makes me say that ? Your attitude, and that paragraph :

"Also, for the record, I don't think Taylor Swift knows anything of substance about Aristotle. I, on the other hand, took a three-hour long oral exam over Aristotle's life work while out-of-my-mind-high on Dayquil and pain meds after a surgery. I got an "A", and, somehow, I lived through that, I doubt the validity of Swift's claims to know anything at all about philosophy. Especially, considering how all her songs are about as deep as a puddle. "

Sounds like you're here to show off, and to make yourself look like something, without having a clue what it means to have the inclination of a philosopher. Or you know what it means, and you've lost it somewhere along the way.

If you've studied philosophy, and actually took time to read and understand the words of philosophers, you know not one of them would condone your attitude, the way you use their names, the way you're making your arguments. Having an A for an exam on Aristotle does not guarantee that you'll be able to make good arguments for the rest of your life. Nor does it guarantee that you understand his work, or are good at philosophy. It just means that, at one point, on a very specific part of Aristotle's work, you had enough knowledge to be rewarded with a good mark. It stops there. It does not mean anything else. Even if it was for your master's thesis. Sure, you know more than TS about philosophy and she fakes knowledge in her songd, but is showing off your grade and putting yourself as the center point of your argumentation the best way to convey that message ? No. You're trying to put her down by putting yourself above others. To anyone with a sense of philosophy, it just looks like you're a student who never understood the works he/she read, and focused on grades and others' approbation instead.

You care about your degree ? Re-read the books and make use of your ability to understand them. Not as a way to show off, but as a way to lean into the attitude a philosopher might have.

You write posts using philosophy ? Make it palatable to others, and show its uses. Be humble. Same thing for literature. The people whose books you read, they want knowledge to be spread. Studying philosophy should have, at the very least, helped you see that. The degree you got is here to push you to continue doing what all previous philosophers and writers did before you got to read them. Otherwise, your degree serves no purpose, other than satisfying your ego. At least, that's how it looks in that post.

Anyway, it'd just be nicer if you used your degree to show the benefits of philosophy, rather than to stroke your ego. Think about Socrates for a while. He asks questions, he makes simple arguments, he rarely talks about himself, he wants others to learn. That's the idea. Not showing off. Not being an ass to a girl you've never met. But being open for discussion, and make sound arguments, for others as well as yourself. What was the point of you fixating on the misuse of 'soliloquy' ? What did it bring to others ? And your anger towards TS, why ? Why write a whole post about it, shove it in her fans' face, what's the point ? Did anyone get anything positive from that ? And why bring your degrees and grades into the mix ? Anyone can make an informed and sound argument, even without a degree. What did it give you to say all those things ?

Fyi, I was taught philosophy in France. I know people in America and the likes get taught philosophy differently than how its done here. Wouldn't be surprised if there was a cultural difference in the way we understand the discipline. I've got a master's degree in the subject, and six years of study under my belt, if that matters to you. Was top of my class also. And I've lived with a philosophy teacher for eight years, too. In case you try saying I have no place speaking about philosophy the way I do.

There is barely anyone who gives a damn about philosophy. You're one of the few who cared about it enoigh to study it. Make good use of your degree, and don't be an ass to others.

Let me give you a piece of my mind, because, honestly, my dear friend, what are you doing? 

Is this some kind of moral flex in which you prove to be the better person because you’ve never implied that there’s no way a certain person knows anything about Aristotle? You want to seem like the better person, because I took one single cheap-shot at Taylor Swift’s intelligence amid a full literary explanation as to why she is using a specific term wrong? Are you joking? You want to call into question my entire education? Because I said Taylor Swift is not as “deep-thinking” as she claims? Okay, yeah... you’re right I guess that makes my entire education invalid. My bad. I’ll go rip up my degrees.  

First of all, let’s address your arrogance. You write, “Sounds like you are trying to show off, and to make yourself look like something, without having a clue what to means to have an inclination as a philosopher” (para.4) in response to me saying Taylor Swift probably doesn’t know anything about Aristotle. Yeah, obviously that line is a quick jab at Taylor Swift. So, what? Am I writing an essay? No. Am I writing a journal article? No. Am I writing to a conference committee with a submission of my finest work? NOpe. I’m saying that I would bet money that I know more about Aristotle while suffering the effects of surgery-induced delirium. It’s not that deep. It’s not meant to be a deep, philosophical take on the nature of Taylor Swift’s work. I’m throwing a metaphorical tomato at her, while yelling “boooo.” So, what? You say, “Play nice.” No. Taylor Swift is not my student, nor my friend. I, thus, have no obligation to try to teach, guide, or help Taylor Swift understand anything. I’m not her philosophy teacher, and, you know what, I don’t think she cares about philosophy at all. You know why she name-dropped Aristotle? It rhymes with “full-throttle” and “Grand Theft Auto” (Swift “So High School”). I’m laughing at her so-called poetical lyricism. In the same breath, I’m judging her for relegating Aristotle to a cheap throw-away line in a dumb pop-song in which she sings about how her football boyfriend makes her feel like she’s 16 again. It’s so mind-numbing.

I’m sad. It’s not anger that compels me, but sadness and disappointment. I’ve been a fan for nearly 15 years and my original post came from lamentations about outgrowing an artist I once respected.  Granted, I might have been angry while writing that post (sue me about it).  

 I do respect Taylor Swift’s work enough to criticize it, however, do not twist my words to mean that as an attack on her personally. I do not wish harm to other human beings, yet it is worth noting that I talk in many other posts about my disgust towards her immoral actions. Even still, most of my posts about Taylor Swift are linguistic or literary criticisms meant to help me process this absolute let-down of an album. I’m also just practicing my literary criticism abilities (I start Grad School in like 2 months, so I’m trying to keep my skills sharp). It’s all low-stakes.  And, you’re mad at me? You think I’m being mean? Why? You think that I’m “being an ass to a girl [I’ve] never met”? (para. 8). Taylor Swift is not a girl, first of all, she is older than me and I’m a grown woman. She is way richer, and way more powerful too. What is your point? 

Let’s talk about the next line in question: “What is the point of you fixating on the misuse of ‘soliloquy’? What did it bring to others?” I’m fixating on the term soliloquy because Taylor Swift has been using this faux literary/ dark academia aesthetic to sell her records for years now. She’s wears “my coat” (if you catch my meaning). She’s using my real-life study as a way to sell shoddy, sloppy records. I’m going to call that out. Despite her using all the aesthetics of academia, she’s not intelligent enough to even just use the term soliloquy correctly. I noticed it right away, and so did many others. If she can’t even get small details correct about literature, why should I believe that she even knows anything about literature at all? It destroys her creditability. I’ve taught students the term ‘soliloquy” as high school kids. It’s not too much to ask for the biggest pop star in the world, and someone who claims the title of “good” writer, to teach herself what a soliloquy actually is before using it in a song just because it sounds similar to “sanctimonious.” If it’s wrong, she’s just wrong. She could have hired an editor. Now, I won’t go into the context of the line here, too much, but the whole line is her calling her audience a bunch of sanctimonious morons who are talking to themselves. (Is Taylor Swift playing nice enough for you? I wonder....)  

Let’s move on. 

Now, let’s talk about your concept of “inclination of a philosopher.” 

You are correct in saying that often teaching Philosophy varies remarkably from country to country. I was weaned on the analytic philosophy, whereas I believe the French are more continental. (Correct me if I am wrong.) So, the effect of this is that I am obviously quite blunt and fond of Aristotelian logic. Who doesn’t love a good syllogism? A funky little linguistic proof? Yes? Still, I must remind you that I wasn’t really making an argumentative point about actual philosophy in relation to Taylor Swift.  

To the crux of the issue, however, I must say that I was actually showing the inclination of philosophy by correcting the intrinsic flaws of the songs I disliked so much. What is philosophy if not the spirit of seeking truth and wisdom? Critique and analyzing poetical works often tie directly into the philosophical field of aesthetics wherein the goal is true, fruitful, understanding on how literary devices and aesthetic representation actually function. If anything is also in effort of seeking truth, surely, you see that critique and correction is? And asking for better workmanship? I was only mad, because mining Taylor Swift work for aesthetic meaning is like searching for Gold in a parking lot. : (  

Next point: “to anyone with a sense of philosophy, it just looks like you’re a student who never understood the works they read, and focused on grades and others’ approbation instead.” 

First of all, this is rude. You don’t know me. You read my honest, brief anger, that I managed to condense into a couple lines in one single tumblr post, and that gives you the audacity to say I’m a bad student who sought grades above all else? Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh................. Okay, tell me why I spent hours in study rooms and sent countless emails begging for guidance through things I didn’t understand. Tell me why, I’ve stood in front of people and blatantly admitted that I did not understand the readings. Learning takes time, and there is no shame in taking your time. Grades are just letters. What matters is how the strength of what you learn impacts how you act in life. I’ve learned my lessons with all the ferocity of a child falling down a hill and running back up it again. I know my own intentions, and you don’t. I mentioned my "A" in the post really just to lend credibility, through professorial authority (lol), to the fact that I think Taylor Swift is fake smart.

Next: SocRaTeS? You're Joking! What is he doing here?

In an eternal quest for my own understanding, I often returned to Socrates. Did you not see my profile picture? Socrates is my homeboy. If ever I get to choose how to die, I will die like Socrates. Willingly, and with a full-bodied credulity of my own philosophical stances.  

You say, “Think about Socrates for a while. He asks questions, he makes simple arguments.” First, he does not make simple arguments. Is it not a syllogism? He writes full dialectical structures. This is some of the most complex stuff I have ever read. Let’s talk about why: Over the centuries, we’ve come to call it the Socratic method. This method includes discursive questions meant to make people question not only others on their reality but to question the most internal mechanisms of the mind. It asks them to think about why we believe or hold the beliefs that we do. He, famously, likens it to a child's development in the womb. The questions are meant as an external way to engage with mechanistic development of thought itself- thus we untangle the dangerous thread of rhetoric internal to our own rational minds. It’s a type of meta-analysis of the self-more than it a simple game of question and answer. Like children from the womb, according to Socrates, we must develop our rational minds too. And, above all else, the Socratic method seeks truth.  

Socrates would approve of my literary criticism of Taylor Swift, because I am using it to seek a higher truth. And, in some way, I am inversely questioning my own reasons for seeking what I do. I enjoy poems for a reason. I like to ask myself why I like what I do, and what meaning it brings through my unique perspective. (Applied to others as well, I love to hear from others). I critique Taylor Swift not because I hate her, but because I want to engage with the aesthetic qualities of the material world that elevate my ability to empathize, to think, to engage, to feel the world around me. I love art. I love reading, I want people to write with intelligence. You know then, the soul-crushing feeling of realizing an artist is actually bad. She rhymed Aristotle with Grand Thef Auto... Socrates himself would shudder. Socrates would also recognize that aesthetic quality ought to undergo critique and beauty interrelates to moral value. He was of the belief, and I dare say I believe it too, that beauty, aesthetic beauty, can be likened to moral value through the identification of ways in which it reveals the truth of our very souls. To him engaging with aesthetics is one way in which to reach out and connect the metaphysical to the material, in such awe-inspiring ways.

Ever been moved to tears by a painting? I have, but the question is WHY? That is why I critique literature, poetry, art... music. Whatever I can get my hands on really. I really want to find out, WHY? why was I crying in the Art Gallery, right next to the ice cream shop and everything.

 You are perhaps right that I could make more of an effort to explain my points, and also the "moral of the story" or what I hope other people will take away from what I wrote. I’m only ever critical of something if I care enough to either love it or wish it was better so that I could love it. To be honest, I didn't think anyone would read my silly vent post about Taylor Swift, but here we are. I could do better. I usually save my real efforts for my published work, though.

And you, my dearest colleague, are apparently spineless. If your conviction on philosophy is that we must all be kind and precious to each other for fear of causing offense, then I think your career will sink like a rock. Socrates was mean as hell, though not spiteful or malicious. He was mean in the sense of asking people to take a good, long hard look in the mirror. I would ask Taylor Swift to look in the mirror too, but she has a whole song about how she’s not going to do that (Anti-Hero). As you see, I hope that I am not spiteful either. But I do want people to be better and make better art. Socrates would say the same. I say what I say and I mean it. Because I am desperate for something true and beautiful and real. There is no one on earth above reproach. There is no school of philosophy which suggests passivity is tantamount to intelligence. I will not be passive.  

You say: “Make it palatable to others. Be humble” 

How’s this for palatable: No <3. Why diminish myself? Why should I obfuscate and dance around my own hard-won intellectual skill? Why should I dumb it down? It is not egotistical of me to use my own skillset. Does a doctor not save lives? Do they apologize for using their skills? Does a mechanic not do the same? Does the poet not also do the same? What of the critic?  

I can be humble, though. Humility is being self-aware enough to recognize that some might have a skillset more advanced than your own. I seek guidance and consistently challenge myself in academic endeavors. I can recognize the authority others have just as well as I can recognize my own authority. I will not, however, shrink down because you think I’m being too know-it-all-y.  

Humility does not require that I speak only when choking back apologies for the audacity I have to speak. I am not sorry. I spent the last 6 years of my life working on two degrees while working 3 jobs. It was hard. I’m proud of myself. If someone feels upset that I speak about the field of study I have fought to participate in, well, I genuinely don’t know what to tell them. Intellect is not a threat (to most). I would say, “if you have a question, ask it.” I actually am very friendly despite my sharp tongue. I am a teacher to my bones <3 and I love my job.  

Anyway, if I missed any of your points, misrepresented them, or offended you greatly- my inbox is always open. And I love a good, well-structured argument. However, next time can we talk about actual philosophy instead of you just attacking my character, thanks. <3 Obviously, I took offense. I think you meant to offend me though, for whatever reason. Really, I did go back and crack open a few books to write this, double check some things, so thank you.

Did you get your graduate degree in America? Would love to know. I am planning on getting another Master’s after I am done with this first one. I want to study aesthetics ( LOL).  

Ps. Why can’t people show off? I love when people have a talent that they aren’t afraid to share.

[11rosebunny]

can you do headcannons ab how would be if Umemiya fell in love for Sakura's sister?

(desculpe se algo estiver errado, inglês não é minha primeira língua 🥲)

Hajime Umemiya falling for Sakura’s older sister (DRABBLE)

It was quite the shocker when the people around him found out that he had an older sister. It was funny how you first met your brother's friends.

Not even a week into a High school and Sakura texts you to come to the restaurant called PHOTHOS down at the Main Street. Generally speaking, you've grown accustomed to the different types of behaviours Sakura gives out and so when you read one of his rare texts to meet him outside at night on the first day of school, you're scared shitless.

You jump out of bed and rush to the designated place and swung the door open in heavy breaths, afraid he was beaten up and rushed to the nearest shelter. You zoomed down the street like a complete maniac until you came face to face with the lightly dimmed restaurant before swinging the door open.

There, you saw your younger brother sitting with a group full of people?!

You hadn't realized how crazy you might have looked, too in shock at the scene of Sakura staring back at you with wide eyes. He wasn't expecting you to come here so quick.

Shortly after, the others began to murmur about who you were and asked Sakura since they caught on the fact that you were staring at him alone. The moment he said it, they all went berserk.

"She's my older sister. I told her to come!"

Even the brown-haired worker shouted. Much to your dismay, the sight of three other first years were around him, but something that stuck to your eye was the table right beside theirs, was a pair of two older guys wearing the same uniform as them. Eventually, Sakura reeled you into the place and made you sit in front of him and right in front of you to your left sat an odd looking boy with grey hair? At first you thought it was fake and he maybe dyed it, but looking up close, it was indeed his actual hair.

Your younger brother ended up admitting he called you to come here because he knew he was going to come home late and didn't want you to eat dinner alone.

Afterwards, you briefly chatted with his friends for the first time but at the end of the night when all of you exited out the restaurant, the grey-haired man known as Umemiya called you over. You learned he was the president at his school that was also in charge of looking after the town. Doing so, he asked for your number purely because he wanted to call you if Sakura would end up getting injured at anytime (they explained Sakura was now involved with a fight with Shishitoren tomorrow. You weren't happy with him).

It's weird though, even after the fight, Umemiya continued to chat to you over the phone—it was a bit unusual for the man. Sugishita was the first one to notice with the way he kept getting up from the garden to check his phone every 10-15 minutes. The boy questioned what was happening but never had the balls to ask him.

You didn't mind speaking to him for the first few times, you weren't attending the same school as Sakura and it was nice hearing how your younger brother was doing at school since he refused to tell you (he was too embarrassed at how nice everyone was treating him). Eventually, your conversations end up leading to speaking about yourselves and learning each other's interests. He didn't expect to speak to anyone at all like this, it's even come to a point whenever he sees Sakura, he asks how you're doing.

The boy didn't think much of it since he wasn't aware you were speaking to his representative for his school until one day Umemiya calls you for the first time and asks where Sakura is.

He was sick that day, and so you had to take care of him in the morning. You were a bit hard on him needless to say, but after cooking him up a quick warm dish, giving him medicine, hot towels, and alone time, you now found yourself stuck on what to do. You couldn't get close to him otherwise you would get sick, you told the grey-haired man to which he replied with.

"Do you want to come to the school to help me garden?"

"Really?"

He had told you about his garden through phone and seeing that you didn't have anything to do, you accepted his offer. The two of you were a bit awkward—he's not going to lie. But soon enough, the both of you warmed up together.

That was when Sugishita understood why he had been checking his phone so often during those days.

Afterwards, that was when he started to grow closer to you.

The two of you grew very close in a matter of days, chatting every single day in the morning and before bed. He doesn't find it odd to text and become friendly with the opposite sex. He's had many countless friends that were girls and was known to be a charming man that anybody liked. But still, with that many people on his roster it's hard to keep up with every single one of them. So why now was he keeping such a close eye on you?

The first thing he noticed was he would slightly feel annoyed whenever you replied a little too late. He would never show that he's mad at you for that due to how well he covers it. In the following weeks he finally his the courage to ask if he can pick you up from school and bring you to help tend his garden. The first time you gardened with him, you had a lot of fun and took pictures to send it to Sakura who was back home (he yelled on text saying— 'ARE YOU AT MY SCHOOL ?!') and so you agreed to help him after school.

It all seemed normal to him, texting and calling you every single day, picking you up, running quick errands with you, and holding your stuff. It's hard to process those feelings he gets around you and shakes it off by saying that he just likes you a lot because you're a good person. Yeah—that's the best explanation.

However, whenever you reply late, take a little longer than usual when he picks you up because a boy was talking to you after class about your group project. He senses a faint taste of bitter on his tongue and almost replies in a passive aggressive manner to those types of things.

"I've been waiting out here for a little longer than usual [Name], what were you doing?"

But soon enough when he hangs out with his best friend Hiragi on a Friday afternoon, due to the fact you were busy that day, the spiky-headed boy brings you up in his conversation at the fast food restaurant the sat in eating their burgers.

"Y'know you really seem to like her Ume."

"I just think she's nice is all." He replied back, in a split second Hiragi caught on the way his voice faltered for a second.

"You say that but whenever ya hear her speakin' to a boy that isn't you, ya get all quiet and nonchalant."

He hummed, "Only sometimes..."

"For pete sakes—you like her gosh damnit!"

[gabessquishytum]

Glad to have you open again! To celebrate, we love us some Professor Hob with student Dream, and we love us some mafia au, so why not combine the two?

Morpheus Endless is fully aware of what the family business is, and that at some point in the future he will likely be asked if he wants to find his own niche in it—and he probably will. For now though he doesn’t really care about all that so long as he’s able to use his family’s resources to get what he wants (he’s rather spoiled and rarely been told “no”).

The latest thing he wants is his college history professor Hob Gadling. He’s handsome, charming, and kind, and Morpheus spends most of his classes fantasizing about taking him out on dates to fancy restaurants and kissing him under the stars (or bringing him back home and laying him out on Morpheus’ expensive silk sheets, depending on whether he’s feeling more horny or romantic that day). He generously waits for his guards to stalk him gather information on him and perform a background check, but otherwise he doesn’t pine in silence very long before approaching Professor Gadling to ask him on a date.

Hob is by now accustomed to the occasional crush from his students, and has been propositioned by some a handful of times. Admittedly this is the first student to expressly ask him out (as opposed to just requesting an opportunity for “extra credit”), and he’s honestly a little flattered. But he decided early on that he wouldn’t be the kind of teacher who becomes involved with his students, so he does his best to turn Morpheus down as gently and kindly as he can.

In response, a tearful Morpheus goes directly to his chief bodyguard, the Corinthian, and demands he fix the situation.

That is how Hob, after being threatened persuaded to reconsider, finds himself sitting across from Morpheus (who has a pretty good idea how Hob was persuaded, but doesn’t care so long as it means he’s here) at dinner at one of the finest restaurants in town. He had no idea that his student, a kid who looked like a stiff breeze could blow him away, was mobbed up. However he does have a bit of experience with this type of spoiled, and he’s pretty sure that if he just plays along a little and bides his time, Morpheus will discover some new shiny plaything to distract him and leave him alone again.

(Little does Hob know that it only takes a handful of dates for Morpheus to become even more besotted, and his fantasies are quickly evolving into turning Hob into his perfect little mafia wife…)

-🪽anon

Thank you so much friendo, this is a great prompt to get back in with!

I'm imagining how that conversation with the Corinthian went down for Hob. Did he show up at Hob’s office hours?

Cori: It's about Morpheus. He's infatuated with you and wants you to join him on a date.

Hob: ah, I know. But nothing appropriate happened, I promise I turned him down-

Cori: that is precisely the problem *reveals knife in jacket pocket*

...anyway, for the sake of his physical wellbeing, Hob shows up to dinner with Morpheus. In a way, the whole situation is quite funny for Hob (a grown, mature adult). This spoiled little brat thinks he can buy anything and anyone apparently, but one day he'll surely learn that money and power aren't everything. Hob is smiling into his wine glass, somewhat amused by the little mafia prince's attempts at seduction.

But Morpheus is unhinged, as well as spoiled, and his attention doesn't wander away from Hob. Weeks and months of dates pass by, with Hob refusing to do more than kiss his cheek after dinner. Morpheus is growing impatient. Hob is his boyfriend, they should be doing more than making small talk and barely touching! And so, Hob gets a second visit from the Corinthian.

And now Hob’s feeling kind of worried. Because Morpheus seems to be genuinely obsessed with him, and Cori has made it clear that Hob needs to start behaving like a doting lover, or there will be consequences. Involving the knife.

So, he is sucked in deeper to Morpheus’s life. There are more dates; these ones more intimate than before as they take place in Morpheus’s large private apartment. They're alone together at last, and then it's a little easier for Hob to pretend that it's all normal and okay. Kissing Morpheus feels good. Accepting gifts from him feels easy. Being touched by him... Well, at least nobody else will ever have to know. And Morpheus is quite a little sweetheart, really. Maybe because he has the Corinthian to do all the dirty work for him...

It'll be the Corinthian who finally "persuades" Hob to give up his job and be the "support" that Morpheus needs as he takes his place in the family business. Hob has a responsibility to keep Morpheus happy at home now. Isn't that more important? Because Hob does love Morpheus. He just wishes sometimes that they could have a normal life together.

And standing in the purple satin evening gown that Morpheus requested, draped all over in diamonds and rubies, smiling dutifully at the other members of the family, Hob can't help but wonder if Morpheus will keep him forever. Because at this point, Hob’s not sure what he'd do without him...

[rosy-crow]

Yeah, after watching the teaser, I’m really starting to think Square is doing the Arcane thing.

I’ve been talking about it with @altocat for a while now, and I feel like it’s starting to get real. So, this is just gonna be my final theory for the story until proven otherwise.

Spoilers for Arcane: League of Legends, but for anyone that doesn’t know, basically Arcane adapted LOL and developed one of their most iconic villains, Jinx, into a very well-written character with a story that showed you exactly who she was and why she eventually lost her mind. Before this show, she was probably about as developed as Seph was in the OG.

Even though Jinx is more flamboyant and emotionally chaotic, she and Seph are weirdly similar villains from what I’ve seen. Seph reminds me a LOT of Jinx and vice-versa. I’ve even drawn them together and compared their designs—it’s funny how mad villains in video games tend to have key similar design points, even down to hair-styles and clothing, but I’ll save that for another post lol.

Anyway, from the FS teaser it looks like we have a big climax in that ultimately leads to this scene with Seph and Rosen, who have been set up to be mirrors of each other.

All I know is that the trailer showed Rosen telling Seph to make a choice about which life he wanted to save (Japanese version made this a bit clearer), and the other lives in danger are Team Glenn. Seph is gonna have to choose between them, and….well, since we know Team Glenn lives….uhh…and also….

Rosen’s dog is trying to alert the others of something. Seph made a choice or did SOMETHING, and I thiiiink it’s gonna result in Rosen’s death. Whether it was intentional or an accident, we don’t know, but it’s clear this is when sane Seph when was still good and caring, even if a little psychologically stunted and conditioned because of Shinra. He’s been consistently this way throughout the First Soldier and doesn’t change until Nibelheim.

But I get the feeling everything went wrong with Rosen. That’s why Glenn is at odds with Seph years later.

This is also why we’re getting Arcane vibes. If it’s a misunderstanding or rift caused by Seph’s intentions to save his friends…well, that’s very familiar to this notorious Arcane scene:

Basically, Jinx…or Powder, as she’s known here, makes a drastic decision to save her friends and sister from genuine danger. However, her own talents are her worst enemy, and she causes twice as much destruction as the enemies her friends were struggling with. Almost everyone ends up dead, except for Powder’s sister. It was a horrific mistake and creates a massive rift between Powder and Vi (that’s the sister).

Vi also cements the idea in Powder’s mind that she’s a “jinx” or a curse of sorts. A complex that Powder had already been struggling with, and one she later embraces as her persona.

Glenn and young Sephiroth have been established to have a bit of a brotherly relationship so far, with Glenn being the down-to-earth and honest older source of influence. There was also the whole arc between these two revolving around Glenn initially calling Sephiroth a “cyborg” as an insult to say the kid was modified and different, not a “normal human.” This lowkey came off like a deliberate reference to Sephiroth’s later meltdown over not being human, yeah?

So you guys see what I mean, the themes here are similar to Arcane and Jinx’s psychology. If Seph makes some fatal mistake or a bad choice to save his team, and they walk in on this? Or get the wrong idea? Yeah, it’s gonna turn what was supposed to be an act of heroism into something much worse. It’s also gonna be the perfect reference to Seph’s later big moment in canon…errr, Nibelheim itself, where he just embraces inhumanity and finally goes berserk against everyone’s expectations, traumatizing the main protagonist and his eventual rival in the process.

Again, the theme of “tragic mistake paralleling or foreshadowing a villain’s first deliberate act of cruelty and evil” would be VERY similar to what happens with Jinx in Arcane.

I’m not saying SE is doing this on purpose, really, but the shared themes of identity collapse and “monsters you created” between Arcane and FF7’s main “mad villains” are interesting. Their stories obviously will play out differently, but it wouldn’t surprise me if The First Soldier ultimately culminates in a life-altering decision that Sephiroth makes, one that does NOT end well and births that conflict between him and Glenn.

That’s my theory for now. These teasers are convincing me more and more. We’ll see.

[ryusaidate]

i love saito. i love that uchikoshi does not know or care what's wrong with him. i love that everyone else in the game has real life medical issues and his brain issues are just "i don't fucking know he kills people. we're doing a Bit about Love And Family. he's got Murders People disease."

i love whatever's going on in both versions of in the VaiN. and that when someone asked uchikoshi what was with the scene at the end of the hit route with So was he was like "he's fucked up. you know how it is." and that was the full explanation.

everything he does as a-set especially in the arg videos is so so so funny. this man is having the time of his life pretending to be a fucked up and evil teen idol streamer. "this is your idol" "be seeing you. but you won't be seeing me" i will shove him in a locker also i know i already drew it but "this is kaname date he's a real hot piece of twink ass but unfortunately his personality is awful. he lost his memory or something i don't care" is everything to me

love that he's making this incredibly intricate plan to ruin the life of this random fucking guy he CHOSE to bodyswap with on a whim because he... what, he escaped out the window? you really just wanted him to sit there while you killed a guy as rohan, realised the oxytocin release didn't carry over also half your vision is fucked now, swap back, and then kill him so he can't narc? that was Theft Done To Personally Spite You? anyway he's doing all that and he's like "i mean i guess i'll kill my dad while i'm at it" and i love that.

i'm. still thinking about "killed by your own father" why are you pretending to be your own dad shooting yourself in the middle of your last ditch "well whatever plan's fucked may as kill him" moment!! just another one of your "i'm technically not lying teehee" bits?? (and i KNOW the reading that it's about mizuki but that makes even less sense to me. & i'm a 'most cringefail reading possible' truther.) i really do love 'i didn't lie, i kept my promise' just to be a jackass

i love that he's so candid about talking about his murders and says shit like "homicide is my hobby" but when it comes to shooting people he either says some bullshit like "blowing their brains out" or calling them "fireworks" or it's about date "watching them die." the only time he calls it "shooting" is when someone else is doing it. and normally that sort of thing reads as 'distancing yourself from the crimes' but wouldn't that be fucking wild lmao. i think it reads more like it's above just shooting? it's art! perfect, beautiful art of a lonely moment in time.

and all the "(you were) a murderer. a serial killer" "have you been using other men's names for so long that you've forgotten your own" talk feels like it should be leading into a "we're not so different you and i" but it never does. (i'd be tempted to say it's just self restraint on the part of the writing team but i find that VERY hard to believe given the. everything. about every uchi game.) like he hates date but he views himself as above him and he can't pull himself down to date's level, even to upset him. he's just taking hypocritical shots at date because he knows he cares about "justice" and "morality" and garbage like that, without acknowledging their similarities

i'm normal? i'm normal.

[ghouljams]

Clawing at the door for more cowboyau GHOST team . I’m literally addicted to your writing, I hope you have a lovely day/night! :3

Very quick Logan drabble because I have given him no love....

You spot him immediately as someone new in town. It's a small town and everyone knows everyone so you pick him out quick. He's arguing with Murphy over pricing, using big words like: ludicrous, and absolutely insane, and highway robbery. You laugh and finished sorting through the seeds you want. He storms out of the store in a huff, you catch his eye with a smile. His eyes soften, his step slows almost to a stop, and somehow you get the barest twitch of a smile back, before he seems to remember he's upset and turns to finish his stomping. You hardly pay it any mind, and finish your shopping, cracking a joke to Murphy about hot headed interlopers that gets a few dollars knocked off your total.

The next time you see him you're parked by one of the swimming holes, stripped down for a quick dip before the sun gets any higher. Most folks don't care much about private property when it's over 100 degrees out, but when you pop your head up out of the water he's glarin' at you from the back of a horse. Again, something in his face softens when you grin up at him. He swings down off his horse while you make your way to the shore, you've got a towel in your trunk, but that's on the other side of the pond. Logan offers you a hand to help you out of the water, and you do your best to keep your smile when you push your wet hair off your forehead. He does his best at keeping his eyes on your face.

"You're tresspassin'," He tells you. You laugh, and his lips twitch up just slightly.

"Someone's always tresspassin'," You assure him, "Where'm I tresspassin'?"

"Walker ranch," You hum and he holds out his hand, "Logan Walker." You take it, enjoy the firm shake, the callouses on his warm hand.

"Walker," You nod, shake your head and try to dislodge your smile. You remember some girls in town calling it "Can't Walk-er" ranch, giggling over the new studs running it. You can't say you disagree.

"What's so funny," He asks.

"Nothing," You like the way he smiles at you, like he doesn't believe you, "Y'all are new to the area right?"

"Pretty new."

"Well, here's a tip," You brush the water off your arm, "It's nearly a hundred and ten degrees out, you're gonna get a lot of folks jumpin' in that pond. Best just to let 'em." Logan glances past you to the pond, and gives a short nod. He swipes his straw hat from his head and fans himself with it before thinking better of it and settling it on your head. You wonder if he knows what that means, you suppose it doesn't matter, but it sure isn't the heat gettin' to you now.

"You better get goin' then," He tells you, hooking his boot in the stirup and swinging back up onto his horse, "Wouldn't want a pretty thing like you gettin' lost in the crowd."

[sergle]

me in the aforementioned "I talked about this earlier" convo

[purrvaire]

black sails + tumblr text posts I have on my phone

[narcissisticnugget]

stupid honakana comic that came from the void

text in bubbles under cut

Comic #1

Kanade: So Honami and I are getting married

Ena + Mizuki : Congrats!

Kanade: But now we need to sort out all the details...

Mafuyu: I can be the priest

Mizuki: You're ordained, Yuki?

Mafuyu: Yeah, my mom made me in middle school

Ena: They let kids do that?!?

Kanade: Well, Mafuyu, if you don't mind... (Mafuyu: nods)

Comic #2

Honami: Asahina-senpai! Thank you for ordaining our wedding! (I made you a pie as thanks!)

Mafuyu: ...Thank you.

Comic #3

THE LESBIANS GOT MARRIED!

[niuniente]

Client: I'm going to leave you a bad review. Me: That's okay, spiritual reading services can sometimes be off the spot so I understand. No one can score perfect 100% in any field, in any job. Besides, I always encourage all clients to trust their own guts anyway so good that you did that. Client: 5/5 stars, didn't like this one. Me: ... Okay. I guess?

[mcybree]

“why do i miss gem and the scotts suddenly theyre barely even real”

LITERALLY!! like. that team was held together with scott tape and the sheer force of gem’s personality. i don’t think scott and impulse ever actually even talked the entire time. it only worked because for the first time scott was faced with someone who was bossier than he was. they were awesome i should rewatch secret life

they were actually so fucking funny. All three of them promising to remain loyal and stick together until the very end (bc together they can win this!!) only for gem to hunt scott for sport an episode later was literally so based… their dynamic will always be funnier in my head i think but god it was awesome

[multi-level-shipper]

somehow my life just keeps getting gayer

[sn0wbat]

sparkle on, tiberius ✨

[nayruwu]

cat16 couldve been avoided if guren learned how to communicate and learned how to use both of his hands (WHY CANT I BE THE ONE TO HOLD SHINYA AND MAHIRUS HAND)

very interesting point! he does have two hands!!

on a serious note though, i think not being able to make a choice was kinda what doomed him. he could have chosen mahiru and become a demon like her so they could to to hell together. he could have chosen his friends and just not chased after mahiru, waiting out the end of the world with all of them alive and by his side. but he didn't, and in the end he lost them all.

which is very odd to me, because he was told that you can't have everything, that you have to abandon one thing to get another, so many times. by noya. by shinya. by mahiru. but he never learned.

(and since we still don't really know what exactly he's trying to achieve, who's to say he's not still trying to have everything?)