I know it's fun trying to give your characters insecurities, self-worth issues and making them doubt themselves and it is great way to relate to them afterall.
That said I don't really think Gortash has any of those. I think he is really just bursting with self confidence and "I can do no wrong" and if he had doubts about himself Bane would never name him his Chosen or even look at his direction. And no, I don't really think that even deep down with all his trauma there are any hidden doubts, I don't think that he suffers from self hatred or desilusion.
It is so rare find a villain with no redeeming qualities. There is something so deeply wrong with him. And he fully decided to be like that, he's deliberate in all his actions and he knows that they are wrong. He has a big ego and he does not believe he could fail
You interpretation of Gortash is of course up to your preferences and there's plenty of interesting stories with so many different flavours. But at least in my opinion by trying to give him some internalised hatred for himself or something among those lines you're just making him much less interesting.
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**onk 155 spoilers**
I think I'm TERRIBLE with murder mysteries because well.. I guess I don't understand the psychology of murderers...
But I believe I do a pretty good job regarding people who aren't so here goes:
I could infer that kamiki would not have had any will to live after Ai's death. He was the guy who broke down when his abuser died (he was holding up pretty fine till someone else urged him to carry their deaths but yeah) and we see him describing himself as someone who's killed Ai to his own son while describing he really did love her from the bottom of his heart. After some prying, he later says he didn't intend for it to happen (but it doesn't really make sense from how he's described it because how could he have not predicted it in the slightest if what he's described is really true??? that's why I'm still not believing what he's said entirely!! it's so weird)
Whether he's taken a major part in it or not, we can infer that he feels he's entirely responsible for what happened to Ai. Considering his psychology up till that point, Ai was his lifeline at one point, and for him to have believed he killed it himself would have really taken a toll on him. I think his mental state at that point would've compared to that of Aqua's who's lost any will to continue living, as seen from Ai's funeral.
But Aqua chose to live because he couldn't die just yet. He chose to avenge Ai's death and he'd live for that cause.
What'd have brought Kamiki to decide he can't die yet on his side, then? The only strong reason I could come up with for this guy would be that he wants to bring Ai back and make everything better. I say he'd even go as far as wishing to die in her place. That logic aligns so well with Mephisto and Fatal. I bet he regrets what's happened and when there's regret, you'd want to fix things. If he didn't have that sort of hope, I doubt he'd have wanted to live in the first place. The way he's been acting, it seems as if he's devoted his entire life to a cause, he's really depressed. He doesn't mind being avenged. He actually wants it to happen if that's what Ai wants. He doesn't mind rotting away. But there's something that he has to do before he has to, he says.
If this guy's been up to something, I feel it'd be about Ai. and it'd be for her sake in his perspective(although it may not be so much in reality, it'd be what he believes to be is)
Aqua just. let this guy go in 155 but he shouldn't do that if he's aware he's someone capable of murder.. he should call the cops on him or something even if revenge is that important, who knows what a murderer's up to... but he just. let him go... which means it'd be really irresponsible of him if Kamiki really WAS a serial killer who could be looking for another victim. That's DANGEROUS and he even left on a note that he's "going to do something for Ai". Aqua seems to know a lot about what'd been taking place (he knows about how three people died at least) so if he's let him go, it means that what Aqua thinks kamiki would do for Ai's sake's not something like that.
I wouldn't be surprised if the guy winds up dead in the next chapter but I hope not?? There must be a reason why the idea of him being helped by Ai and her kids was introduced in 154, there's no reason to bring an idea like that, it didn't have to be phrased that way. But Ai left a message to aqua saying "if he's still lost, I want you to help him". This should come true although I can't predict just how it'd come through. He's definitely REALLY LOST, and Ai was concerned about him. I bet she is still now, I don't even know what he's really done at this point, everything's very vague and I need more information to determine how things really were
so yeah, he's off to do something for Ai now (I'm not surprised about that in the slightest) what surprised me is that he was able to accept Ai's message in one go. He doesn't deny it or refuse to believe what she's said about him, he just lets that sink in and he wants to do something for her now after it does. That's actually stronger than what I've first pictured in a way! Although we don't get to see his face or a lot of his reactions, this leads me to think he does care about Ai. He got the message. I'm just not sure what he's going to do.. Aqua you should've chased him; but okay. I guess other things are more important right.
I won't talk much about the other important twist(?) reveal(?) in this new chapter, but I felt really sorry for Ai though. She's surrounded by people who are obsessed with her.. why can't she have someone normal.. she was secretive but I get why she had to be that way o<-< a celebrity's life must be harsh, people just won't let you go.
Oh and I was really curious how Gorou died, it seems like an accident but it's still something that has to be cleared up. The events leading up to that.. it deserves to be explained. He's someone who's worked for Ai's sake in a really genuine way..I'm still sorry about what happened to him even if Aqua's decided to move on from him
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