#its all just immensely tragic and it hurts me but they love each other anyway in what ways they were able

[tiredassmage]

when the deed was done

Well, ask and ye shall receive @captainderyn xD Relevant to interests, the all of 5 minute goodbye Cipher Nine should have gotten with their best Watcher-turned-Keeper. And yet it still hurts, its still bittersweet, there’s never enough time - let along a good time - for them. </3 I warn for nothing except that they needed more hugs and I might need more tissues. ;_;

And if anyone asks, I hate timelines. Send help. xD

Intelligence dismantled. The Star Cabal crumbling. It’s time to say goodbye.

“Keeper.”

She turned around, a smile already reaching across her lips before her brilliant brown eyes had even landed on him. The familiar brush of eye shadow wasn’t enough to hide the darkness around them from him, but then they’d both looked a hell of a lot better than this.

Whatever greeting she was going to return was lost as Nine quickly covered the few final feet between them and she was enveloped against his chest, carefully cradled in his arms gripping around her as tight as they could without hurting her - as if he was somewhere between cautiously terrified she’d vanish if he didn’t hold her down and worried that any further pressure might break her where she stood.

Shara smiled as she buried her face against his chest and allowed her fingers to twist into his jacket. “Well, it’s good to see you, too, Cipher Nine.”

One hand carded carefully through her hair. His breaths were stuttered and measured. Shara nestled against him a bit more and simply waited.

“I couldn’t very well leave without saying goodbye to my Keeper, could I?” Slowly, he extricated himself from the embrace, drawing back to gently frame her face.

“I’m not that fragile, Cipher,” she said, gently brushing her fingers over his knuckles. The marks of Corellia had faded - no doubt Doctor Lokin's insistence paying off. He'd been restless during their final preparations.

Twice in a matter of weeks had she sent him into the fires, then. Time really should have only made it easier.

She didn’t have qualms with mission parameters. It wasn’t a part of her programming - who she was, and surely she had suggested worse than potentially sacrificing a single officer to avert a galaxy consuming war. And there had certainly been enough pressure, given the circumstances. Loathe as she was to admit it, her recovery was taking its toll and was slower than she would have liked.

It’s what she’d tried to tell herself, anyway. But this was Nine. Her Cipher Nine.

Concern deepened the knit of his brow. “Are you alright?” His eyes narrowed. “And don’t give me any of that scripted nonsense. I know you’re capable, Keeper. But I-”

She allowed him to see a tired smile, tapping a finger lightly against his lips to silence him. “I’ll manage, Nine,” she said. “I’ll just need time.”

“Of course.” A faint breath left him that might have been a chuckle, had it been given more space. “I won’t take too much. Minister says I need to get out of here. Back to work, I’m sure.”

“As will we all.” Shara breathed a quiet sigh, letting her gaze drop with his. A free hand toyed lightly with the neck of his jacket, feigning at straightening it. It’d look different for all of them. Even she found herself hard pressed to imagine just how, exactly, the future was going to look without Intelligence. They’d seen their better days.

It was hard to imagine it’d only been some three years ago that the Minister had properly introduced her to her latest agent - even harder to picture her doubts of him at the time, not that they’d ever been personal, exactly.

But here he was, despite it all.

“We’ll see each other again.”

She smiled weakly. “You’ll be fine,” she said. She patted a hand against his chest and looked back up, catching those pale gray eyes one more time. “You’ve always been a resourceful one, Cipher Nine.”

“Shara-”

She shook her head and pressed a finger over his lips again. It was something, wasn’t it? To see him so earnest before her - a strain across his brow over widened crystal eyes she’d seen so swiftly deceive so many times. It’d be easy to say she’d lost count of the hours she’d spent monitoring his work, guarding his every movement, though it’d almost certainly be a lie.

That was okay, though. It was a part of them. Always had been. Probably always would be.

But she could not let him break their one shared silence. Not like this. Not at such an uncertain end.

“You’ve done enough, Tyr. I promise.”

His eyes searched hers for a moment longer before they dropped to the thumb he caressed along her jaw. It was better this way. Whatever happened next, she doubted the Empire was finished with either of them. This way, at least, there wasn’t anything to hold them back.

They’d sold worse lies before.

“You should go,” she said. “But-” She tucked a few fingers under his chin.

And he understood the rest. He ducked to linger in a slow kiss, trailing after her, along her lips like a slow rain on the windows back on Dromund Kaas. For only a minute longer, they chased the few elusive nights that had grounded the last three years.

And all too soon, time was up yet again.

“Take care of yourself, Shara. Please. For me?” He framed her face gently one final time, eyes closed as his forehead rested against hers.

“Stay alive.” She pushed against his chest, coaxing him to step away. “The job’s not finished, Cipher.”

“It never is, is it?” A faint smile flickered across his lips before Cipher Nine gave her a final salute. “I’ll damn well try just about anything for you, Keeper.”

“See that you do. Dismissed, agent.”

[suna-reversed]

Hello :)

Sukuna. fluff. Pretty please.

Could you write something about sukuna falling for itadori's best friend. You can throw some angst in there too because I am a masochist❤️

Sukuna x F! Reader 

oh god, this turned purely self indulgent halfway through. low key thinking of turning this into a series to give you the angst you deserve.

A/N: (reader is Itadori’s senior and is 18) (loosely inspired by the song “me and my husband” by mitski)

“And I am the idiot with the painted face

In the corner, taking up space

But when he walks in, I am loved, I am loved”

——-

- You had been one of the few poor senior students who had been victim to what had been Itadori’s “elevator pitch” for more people to join the occult club early back in high school. [the said “elevator pitch” being him jumping out at random people with a white bedsheet over his head saying “boo” as he handed you the club form]

- You didn't end up joining the club. But you somehow did end up getting joined at the hip with the chaotic mess under the white sheet.

- Whether it was you two rushing to the theatre to watch Jennifer Lawrence’s new movie,  or going to a revolving sushi place [only to get pocky from a nearby vending machine instead because revolving sushi is apparently expensive], Itadori Yuuji had become a comforting and very important presence in your life.

- So of course when he suddenly dropped out of your life, being the worried friend you were, you decided to poke around a little only to find out that he was...dead?

- Maybe a few months down the line, you would’ve started to slightly recover from the tragic news you had just gotten. Instead, what you got was your supposedly dead best friend popping up days later to tell you that he ate a finger and now he was the vessel for some centuries old curse,,,

- Um yeah...safe to say that Yuji did not expect you to go into the fit of emotions that you did [boy had the audacity to call you dramatic for fainting and then crying while hugging him once you gained consciousness] 

- some time passed and Yuji and you didn’t see each other much with him practically training to be the strongest jujutsu sorcerer. Still, simply happy to have him back alive, your brain managed to convinced itself that everything was still the same. 

- And it was when he’d sneak out a day or two from his heavy schedule and you’d be back to your normal routine of watching movies, stuffing your face with snacks, getting your face licked by the mouth on Yuji’s hand…

- ,,,wait what

- The first time the curse had made contact with you was simply out of annoyance of why the stupid brat even took the time to see someone as mundane as you so often.

- His plan was to simply scare you into leaving, knowing it would cause the brat pain.

- So he grabbed the opportunity when Yuji moved forward to brush off some popcorn dust on the side of your mouth, not only licking the side of your face but also being successful in slightly grazing his teeth against your tender skin. 

- Yuji had mentioned that being a vessel had caused some weird physical “abnormalities” for him. you didn’t understand it back then but at least knowing that had sort of prepared you for such an instance.

- So imagine the curse’s surprise [and an even further growing annoyance] when your eyes barely widened for a second before you burst into laugher, 

“Didn’t you train your dog to not bite?”

- by now, Yuji had jumped 5 feet away from you and was still halfway through his string of apologies, but upon hearing your reaction, he mused on your fake calm while letting out a chuckle himself, 

- “Guess I’ve got to get a leash for him” 

- By this point, the ever so indifferent curse had taken two teenagers talking about him like a mere annoyance as a personal challenge.

- And that’s how it started.

- He’d come out every now and then, licking your fingers as Yuji passed you something or making lewd remarks on anything and everything that you ever started a conversation about. 

- But you and Yuji barely paid him attention and it was an understatement to say that it infuriated the living hell out of him.

- Particularly you, who wouldn’t even be annoyed or sarcastic about his tactics anymore. Instead, treating him like a friend who was simply joining you and the brat to hang out. 

- He hated it. Hated how bright your laugh was. Hated how you made them stop every time you saw a stray animal just so you could pet it. Hated how your skin was as soft as a cloud and how you sometimes smelled like cherry blossoms. He’d kill you in an instant if he could ugh.

- it was a weekend and Yuji and you had been watching a movie, even though Yuji was barely paying attention. You knew he was tired as his large frame slumped over your shoulder. Pulling the blanket up to his face, you once again felt the wet feeling of the assaults you had grown familiar with on the side of your hand.

- “You could’ve just asked for a pocky if you wanted one, no need to lick it off my fingers you grumpy little thing”, you laughed as you stood up to go to the bathroom

- that snapped the final string. 

- Coming back into your living room, you wondered if Yuji had somehow gotten up in his sleep and managed to draw weird black lines over himself all in the span of 5 minutes. 

- ‘Yuji, what the fuck?’

- ‘Well well, now who’s acting like a grumpy little thing’ 

- The deep voice sent rumbles down your spine and you knew in an instant what had happened. 

- Even though your breath hitched in your throat and your body begged for you to run as fast away as you can, you held your ground as you simply tilted your head at the curse 

- “Well, I’d like my best friend back if you don’t mind.”

- You saw the smirk on Sukuna’s face falter for just a second before he crossed the space between the couch and you.

- Now as strong of a front as you managed to hold up until now, watching something like that stride straight towards you would have had even the strongest of sorcerers shitting bricks.

- Instinctively, you took a few steps backwards, but he simply continued to close the distance between the two of you until you were backed up against the wall.

- You flinched as he slammed a hand right next to your head and he seemed to gain immense satisfaction from that as he looked down at your startled face with a smirk plastered on his tattooed face. 

- Sukuna was sure that you’d be begging for his mercy any second now. His smirk widened and he was ready to mock your pleas as he saw you open your mouth to say something, 

- “ ...so much for a damn pocky.”

- All those other times you had caught the curse off guard were nothing compared to the “partially-confused partially-baffled” expression that he held on his face now. It almost made him look human. Almost.

- You didn’t realise just how long you were holding his gaze until Yuji took back control and apologized like a million times over, reassuring you that he would’ve never let you get hurt. 

- The curse didn’t show up for almost a week after that. And while you were grateful for not having to wash off your hands or face 14 times a day, you somehow felt anxious about its sudden disappearance. 

- All those worries were thrown out the window as he once again showed up while Yuji was passed out on the couch after a particularly tough session with Gojo sensei.

- Looking at the curse, you felt anger more than anything, how could he just drop out on you with no warning and then show up in the middle of your living room- ...wait a second, why the hell are you mad at a literal curse for not telling you he was taking a mental health break or whatever it was that he was doing? 

- While you sorted out through these conflicting thoughts in your mind, the curse seemed to be going through a similar crisis. 

- Having woken up in the brat’s fragile human body with no warning whatsoever, Sukuna wasn’t in the mood to see your face so soon again. He didn’t know why your physical presence unsettled him so much. All he knew was that he hated it. Even more now that he knew what you looked like all scared and small compared to his vessel’s towering build, and how you smelled even sweeter than what he had tasted, and how despite all that you still had the courage to stand up to someone as dangerous as him. Ugh, disgusting. 

- “The stupid brat passed out.”

- Such a simple statement caused you to snap your head up at him. But he didn’t wait for your reaction as he somehow managed to plop down on the couch while still looking graceful. Picking up the half eaten box of pocky, he warily pulled one out, eyeing it as if it was  a poisoned dagger before breaking off a piece and placing it on his tongue.

- “This is what you would risk your life for, brat?” 

- He turned his head slightly to look at you still frozen in place, staring at him with that doe eyed look that made his chest burn a little. Isn’t this what he wanted all along?

- “Are you simply going to stand there and gawk? I don’t bite-...well, not unless you ask me to.”

- He knew that would set you right back to your usual self,

 - “...maybe we do need to get a leash after all.”

- Sukuna internally grinned as he saw you move to the other side of the couch, ready to hear whatever more of the snarky comeback that you’d have (not that he was anticipating it, it was just the better alternative to being gaped at. Or so he told himself)

- “You ate the non chocolate covered part of the pocky by the way-”

- “As if a layer of this disgusting brown substance can make the rotten stick taste bette-”

- “Well aren’t sticks all you had to eat in yOuR TiME anyways?”- 

—-

- You somehow managed to fall asleep after the bickering, proceeding to sit in silence after you told him to not bother you while you tried to read. You wouldn’t admit it, but you were a little disappointed when he actually didn’t. Instead, he sat on the couch with a slight smirk still plastered on his face, continuing to simply gaze at you. your heart did lunges every time you slyly looked up from your book to take a peak at him. you wondered how many ways he had come up with to kill you so far. 

- On the other hand, the curse sat idly, watching you while his thoughts rumbled in his mind. Maybe killing you can be pushed off the agenda for now. There are much better ways to hurt the brat anyways aren't there? Perhaps he could use one of these brownish covered sticks to-...what is he thinking?

- He ultimately deems it stupid brat’s humane emotions and sheer stupidity that must be interfering with his thoughts.

- A loud sneeze snaps him out of his daze as he sees you slumped against a pillow, your book falling off your lap. And then he does something that he immediately decides that he would pretend to have not done for the rest of his existence. Luckily, the brat takes back control right after he does it anyways.

- But that thought slips his mind as he finds himself replaying the serene look on your face as he gently pulled the book out of your hands, and how his hands shook a little as you nuzzled your nose into the fabric of the blanket that he pulled over you. How could you have felt so calm around him?

[ramblingguy54]

True Colors: An Emotionally Fantastic Serious Game Changer.

If we’re to look back at Reunion as Season 1′s dramatic pay off for Amphibia’s message of toxic friendships, as Anne & Sasha’s conflicting dynamic showed us, then True Colors is a colossal expansive note on this big theme of the series. True Colors makes Season 1′s finale look like a walk in the park for what angst goes down between our three main heroins in Season 2′s climatic resolution. Everything that can go wrong does go oh so painfully wrong for these three kids. Anne, to no one’s surprise, gets double crossed by Sasha leaving things between them a Hell of a lot more bitter than they were previously, as if that couldn’t already be topped when Sasha tried to kill the Plantars before. Anne has had enough of her lies and manipulation not being afraid to tell Sasha straight up how awful of a friend she’s been in general, even hitting her where it hurts most of all saying, “No, I’m done listening to you! I’m done trusting you! You’re a horrible person and I am done being FRIENDS with you!”, going so far as to get a shaken reaction out of Sasha dropping her brave face act, making this girl try to wipe away the frog family.

Right off the bat, True Colors makes it highly evident this isn’t just another story of stopping a bigger threat, but one hitting much closer to home, overall. Yes, King Andrias is certainly a dangerous villain, who makes his presence and intimidating nature known to the others by True Color’s final act, which despite this Amphibia isn’t entirely putting him at the forefront, rather focusing on a more intimate study of Anne, Sasha, and Marcy’s big emotional conflict. This finale knows exactly where to put its focus of importance on, so I love that instead of it being action packed we’re getting the spotlight shined on just how screwed up these three of a friendship have, in spite of Marcy claiming in The Dinner episode, “We’re supposed to be friends for life. We don’t split up!’ . Very ironic stuff right there, indeed.

True Colors’ most powerful strength it adds to Amphibia’s ongoing profound story about healthy friendships is the thorough deconstruction of these girls defined “ideal relationship” as people. Before Anne came to the world of Amphibia this kid was afraid to stand up for what she believed in, even knowing especially well that stealing the calamity box was morally questionable, but did it anyway. Sasha was super manipulative, abusive, and used her power to control people, like she did a lot of toward Anne in their lives. Marcy, while very smart, wasn’t the most competent physically, who soon grew into being more independent without needing to rely on Anne always having to be there for her. These three were changed immensely by the events of being thrust into this world of sentient amphibian creatures. Anne benefited morally most out out of all three in taking up the mantle of responsibility and ironing out her own issues. She’s become a much stronger person all around. 

This episode asks us an important question though in nutshell with, “Have Sasha & Marcy truly changed for the better?”, since Anne has reached a point in her arc feeling genuinely content with who she’s become and the bonds that have been made with the Plantar family shown most notably with Sprig Plantar. Hence the whole purpose behind the song, It’s No Big Deal, with Anne feeling proud for who she is, yet not noticing a bigger issue right underneath her nose. That previous episode was meant to bring Anne’s happiness up only to bring it all crashing down in a devastating display of new revelations in True Colors. Every dramatic emotional beat isn’t just earned. Each significant moment is completely knocked out of the park by terrific voice acting, beautiful animation, and music composition that gave me serious emotional goosebumps. True Colors did exactly as Not What He Seems accomplished for Gravity Falls in shaking up its own respective dramatic stakes just when you thought it couldn’t get any higher for these protagonists. Shit seriously hits the fan here.

Did it ever occur to you, Anne? Sasha? That one of you knew more, than she was letting on? That ONE of you might’ve gotten you stranded in Amphibia on purpose...?

The big bombshell twist of Marcy playing a part too in getting them into this whole debacle completely flips everything upside down. Sasha pushed Anne into taking the Calamity Box, yes, but if Marcy never sent that photo because of her desire to stay with them together forever, then they wouldn’t have been stranded in basically a world full of dangerous creatures and who knows what else. Easily my favorite part of the episode, considering it adds more nuance to a situation that defined Amphibia’s story. It wasn’t just one person’s fault at the end of the day. Sasha bullied Anne into taking the box, Anne didn’t put her foot down to make a stand for something morally questionable, and Marcy took advantage of them both to benefit her own selfish desires for supposedly a “happy ending” not involving them staying apart, due to her parents moving away for a new job. All three girls played an important part on why they got landed into Amphiba. It’s why Anne’s statement to King Andrias, “The three of us may have made some mistake, but you...You’re evil and I’m gonna stop you!”, holds such a real weight to it, as this story continues to solidify how genuinely fleshed out their dynamic is.

Marcy’s super desperate plea to be understood by Anne & Sasha when Andrias revealed her getting them thrown into Amphibia purposefully was hard to watch. On one hand, I felt for Marcy because she didn’t want real life circumstances to tear apart that close connection she had to Sasha & Anne. Sure, she could’ve just kept in touch with them over the phone or chatting online, too. However, Marcy had known them since very early childhood. When you’ve been so attached to someone it can be a devastating thing, depending on just how vulnerable you are emotionally, to start drifting apart. Marcy represents that embodiment of toxic need for togetherness and couldn’t bear to let a possibility, like moving away, throw a wrench into her happiness and friendship, as well.

Never mind Marcy wanting to stay permanently in a different reality, rather than face her’s, but it made this person feel like something more. It gave her a chance to feel truly special in being able to live out a fantasy dream of having such power and freedom that a kid, like herself, couldn’t have had. The freedom to know she is plenty capable of making it out there on her own without Anne having to watch this kid like a hawk. So, to have someone, or something, try taking it away from her terrified Marcy of facing a terrible truth. That she isn’t strong enough after all to live a life without Anne & Sasha by her side completely, where Marcy will never feel truly worthy enough to blossom into her own person. It’s why that line, “I just...didn’t want to be alone...”, carries such a deep pain to it all. Marcy just crumbles into pieces accepting her greatest weakness. As much as Marcy fumbled the ball big time, it’s so easy to empathize with her on the idea of feeling competent enough. Marcy never meant to hurt Anne or Sasha, but the sad crushing punchline is she very much did.

Speaking of which, Anne had every right to be upset and mad, obviously. Anne has been missing so many things from her life before everything went off the wall. Hopping Mall especially highlighted Anne’s emotional desire to give anything just to hear her mother’s singing again. This teenager has been really dealing with a lot of grief in general quite honestly. Anne got into a high stakes battle against Sasha to save new friends, who’d practically became like an adopted family, which left the poor girl traumatized and heartbroken over the end result. She thought finding Marcy would help compensate for it and eventually be able to mend those complications with Sasha to boot. It’s simply painful to see it all blow up in Anne’s face to know not only Sasha betrayed her trust yet again, but realizing Marcy also played a part of responsibility in getting them thrown here. Matt Braly really just decided to slap future trust issues onto Anne finding out Hop Pop, Sasha, and Marcy were all super dishonest in their intentions at one point or another. Damn, I feel so bad for her.

It makes their embracing hug back in Marcy At The Gates so much harder to watch. Anne was super glad to see her again. Anne had wondered what became of Marcy or even possibly started to think she could even be alive at all. Then come to find out later on Marcy having intentionally ripped her away from a normal life must’ve felt worse then what happened with Sasha. Anne, already done with all of Sasha’s bullshit, thought she could at least expect better from Marcy not letting her down, but that too wasn’t the case. Marcy is very much as flawed as Sasha in what she has done. To think, Anne wanted so badly to get back home, yet she’s staring the very person dead in the eye, who ripped her away from it to begin with. Marcy knew Sasha would talk Anne into taking the box from that thrift shop, even if she wasn’t completely certain it would successfully teleport them away. Regardless of whatever good intentions someone can have in why they did what they did, it still doesn’t absolve them of said mistake. Fact of the matter is, Marcy tragically made her own bed, by choosing to mess with forces she couldn’t begin to comprehend and now has to face consequences, in spite of her not deserving them.

What really got to me was when Marcy tried to spin around Anne’s personal growth and close friendship with the Plantars as all entirely thanks to her. When she said, “I gave you this! I gave you everything!”, I was like, “Nope, that couldn’t be any further from the truth.”, seeing everything that has culminated in Anne’s journey of bettering herself. Marcy didn’t give Anne anything, but a one way ticket to cutting the kid off from her family, presuming she’d be fine with this idea. It’s all kinds of messed up, however what it boils down to is Marcy undermining Anne’s independence and agency. Anne’s moral judgement in decision making was what allowed her to create this new life she made for herself in Amphibia. Anne’s honesty as a whole led her down a path of togetherness, while Marcy’s lying landed her in a result of not wanting to be alone, costing her so much.

“I don’t believe this. We were so focused on each other we couldn’t see what was right in front of us!”

True Colors excels at earning each of its emotional beats because they line up with character motivations down to the last letter. Anne doesn’t want to trust Sasha anymore because of their already rocky past, which leads to her helping King Andrias regain control of his kingdom. Sasha not keeping a lid on her temper, wanting to rule over Amphibia, and trying to reinforce that power dynamic with Anne & Marcy only made things worse for her image of a changed good friend. There wasn’t a chance in Hell Anne would hear Sasha’s reasoning after she flat out tried to take away her frog family, by attempting to use the Calamity Box a bit ago in the episode. Marcy wanted to believe there was a happily ever after in seeing this world traveling idea as their only chance for salvation as friends for life, but it turned out to be something much more sinister, when learning of Andrias’ backstory and his true scumbag nature. All three of their motivations come clashing together, blinding them from a much bigger danger. Something that effectively puts everyone at stake.

Amphibia’s Season 2 finale works so excellently, given it covers important dramatic elements it’s been stirring around since Season 1′s early rumblings. Amphibia is a story centered around people’s need for emotional connections. True Colors builds miraculously off what Reunion already did quite well in showing friendships can become rough and they are never easy to deal with. When you have to make a stand it can be a tough pill to swallow on the reality check of maybe this “good friend” of your’s isn’t as nice as you previously thought them to be. Anne having been hurt one too many times now by her former friend sends that message close to home, so much so even Sasha begins to question her morality as a human being. It poignantly encapsulates how this trio’s complex friendship is a serious growing issue needing to be reexamined, overall.

What if Anne’s right..? What if I am a horrible person...?

Something I absolutely love to pieces about True Colors, also a testament to Season 2′s darn good writing, is how much introspective we get from each character on what they’re feeling. We’ve seen plenty of Sasha’s vulnerability before in other episodes centered on her issues, but now we’re getting to the root of it. Sasha is really taking everything more to heart, little by little. Sasha��s understanding what kind of an effect she has on people, seeing the damage it has caused made evident by Percy and Braddock in Barrel’s Warhammer. Grime once told her, “Some dreams have a price and not everyone is willing to pay it.”, where she’s questioning that idealism every passing minute the invasion plan proceeds further into reaching success. Sasha isn’t sure what to do with herself anymore feeling aimless. Those previous episodes had a real impact on her priorities more than she cared to let on with Sasha’s typical tough girl act. This kid has let her guard down more, which scares and confuses Sasha. She’s always used to playing the role of protector it contradicts everything Sasha stands for when the roles are totally reversed because now Anne has made her feel the tremendous change in their growth as individuals.

Sasha’s lifestyle has been all about control that after somewhat learning to be more considerate to Anne & Marcy’s feelings she feels beyond conflicted about what truly matters to her. The most screwed up part of it all is Sasha didn’t want to fight anymore, taking up a pacifist approach after seeing what King Andrias had been hiding from everyone. It’s a fitting punishment for Sasha to try bringing Anne over to work together once more, but getting her pleas for companionship outright ignored. Anne was correct that Sasha had wasted all the chances to be reasonable. Boonchuy tried to hear out Sasha before at The Third Temple. One wanted to start things over again to iron out their serious issues, but the other was driven by bitterness, while only remorseful to a degree at best, of seeing their once weak friend become so independent, mature, and stronger that it drove her up wall. Sasha wanted to take away that “problem” being the Plantars, since in her eyes they’re the source of Anne’s strength, driving a wedge further between the two girls in their heated Reunion 2.0 battle.

True Colors demonstrates the horrific price of no trust, communication, nor teamwork from the three main girls that Andrias smoothly took advantage of, as if they were fiddles. 

“That’s the thing about friends isn’t it? The more you love them, the more it hurts when they go.”

King Andrias is quite literally what I wanted Lunaris to be, where DuckTales’ Season 2 finale didn’t impress me on doing. He’s a serious big baddie to the main cast, who follows through on his threats of violence to demonstrate his wide array of arsenal and power. Andrias doesn’t just emotionally manipulate characters, like poor Marcy, but utterly crush them without an ounce of remorse for his actions. When he dropped Sprig out that window after Anne willingly let him have the Calamity Box back I thought they were legit gonna kill this boy off. The way Anne’s flashback montage of her good times with Sprig were eerily shot really didn’t help either on that note. Anne’s Calamity power finally activating is easily up there among stuff, like Dewey risking his life for Della’s disappearance in Last Crash, where the cinematography is shot and animated brilliantly. You feel Anne’s blind raging sadness in every hit she landed on those robots and Andrias. If anyone didn’t believe Sprig was like a little brother to Anne, then I dunno how anyone couldn’t view their bond anymore as such after this hugely defining scene. Anne went bloodthirsty when she believed Sprig to be dead further evidenced when she hugged him in relief afterwards exclaiming, “Sprig!? You’re alive!? Oh, thank goodness...”, which cuts deep so damn much.

Anne was ready to fight every one of Andrias’ troops in that castle to the death, if need be. Before Sprig came back from falling, thanks to Marcy’s quick acting, to comfort Anne, her only goal was to slaughter every opponent in that throne room, along with making Andrias pay dearly for even daring to lay a single finger on anyone of the Plantars. I’m not gonna lie, this pivotal power up reminded me so much Gohan turning Super Saiyan 2 after Cell curb stomped Android 16 into pieces with a smirk on his face. Anne Boonchuy’s maddening outburst is a classic testament to the idea of, “Piss off the nicest person and they’ll make it their mission to instill the biggest kind of fear/terror into you.”. showing this kid at her most vulnerable mental state, yet. Sprig & Anne’s cathartic embrace really messed me up in reinforcing just how these two respect, love, and would go above any of their limitations to help the other out. Sprig’s “death” scene was a masterful bait by the writers into making us think someone was gonna die and it was gonna be a poor kid, no less.  

However, it was actually all just a bait and switch for the real, “Oh, shit. They really just did that”, moment with Marcy unexpectedly getting run through with Andrias’ gigantic sword. In a last ditch effort, Marcy wanted to atone for what she had a hand in getting them all into. Marcy was ironclad determined in making her own stand for what was right trying to save the people she endangered. Akin to what Sasha did in Reunion for saving Anne’s life, Marcy does the exact same here. Although, unfortunately this time, no one is here to protect Marcy from escaping death, like Grime catching Sasha from plummeting at Toad Tower. Marcy couldn’t react in time because she was so focused on helping her dear friends out. She wanted to prove to herself at least one time, “I’ve screwed up so much stuff with my friends. Maybe, just maybe. If I get my friends back home, it’ll prove I’m not an entirely crappy person for setting these events into motion.”. Marcy’s own deep seeded remorse is what saved Anne & the Plantars, while being the cause of her own untimely demise at Andrias’ hands.

This scene is what no doubt encouraged the warning sign for younger viewers Disney decided to make for them. It’s impressive how far Matt and his crew are willing to go for intense dramatic content. Andrias trying to crush Polly with his fist after destroying Frobo with casual ease, dropping Sprig out of the window from up sky high, and stabbing Marcy with his powerful sword displays his cold blooded brutality. Doesn’t matter who you are. If you get in the way of Andrias’ plans for multiverse domination, then he’ll throw anyone into their own grave, be it man, woman, or child. That’s the mark of a truly terrifying antagonist.

Andrias didn’t care who had to be hurt or manipulated to get back the box, so he could invade other worlds with Earth being his next prime target for invasion. Marcy’s fate is a horrifyingly poetic statement, since Sasha stated to Anne in a flashback from Marcy At The Gates, “One of these days, she’s gonna get herself killed.”, with True Colors tying back to this line in a disturbing manner. Something that sends chills down my spine is we get to see the full extent of how far Andrias shoved the sword through her body. We don’t just see the entry point of where it hit her, but it even zooms out to show the whole thing. Real talk, I got serious Avatar The Last Airbender vibes from this scene. Reminded me so much of Aang getting suddenly zapped with lightning by Azula when he tried to enter the Avatar state. Marcy didn’t want to be alone so badly she ended up inevitably dying alone trying to send Anne back home to their reality. One Hell of a way to close off Marcy’s last moments in Season 2, until her inevitable resurrection happens in Season 3 now that King Andrias has her in a tube tank that looks tied to his master.

True Colors ends on a deeply bittersweet cliffhanger leaving the fates of Sasha & Grime totally unknown if they’ll get away by the skin of their teeth, or get captured by Andrias’ soldiers and robots. Anne finally returned home with the Plantars, but at a deadly cost of leaving her other close friends behind in Amphibia. After all the isolation, heartbreak, and endurance she went through with her frog family Anne finds herself at a total loss for words. Once again, Anne is in a state of solitude of not knowing if her friends are really okay or not, mirroring the start of Season 1 when she landed into Amphibia’s world. It’s safe to say to say that, “Finally me and it’s no big deal.”, lyrics have aged terribly for Anne’s realization of finding her own identity came at the expense of getting separated from friends she’s known since kindergarten. Definitely see Anne becoming a lot more protective of the Plantars now more than ever after watching Marcy drop to the ground from being stabbed in front of her eyes.

Amphibia’s Season 2 finale is exactly how you capitalize on a winning story telling formula of dramatic writing, lovable characters with layered depth, and increasing the stakes of your story in an organic manner. True Colors is a finale that should be talked about for a long time to come, as it not only showed how worth the wait it was, but reinforces why Amphibia is a truly great series. It’s unafraid to take its characters to dark places in a way that feels totally earned.

Amphibia Season 2 is everything a sequel to a first film should be.

[fishyfod]

(Slightly) more organized thoughts on the V8 finale.

tl;dr I think the finale had some issues.

I’ll start this off by emphasizing again that this is my opinion, so read something else if you can’t handle negative criticism of RWBY. I say this because too often people in this FNDM can’t handle a difference in opinion without insulting or patronizing others, and I want none of that.

Now, RWBY’s general structural issue is a lack of time to fulfill all their ambitions, and they usually tend to neglect one aspect a bit more than others. In volumes 7 and 8 this proved to be quite a problem, because they wanted to tell quite a complicated story while introducing a fairly large amount of new and returning characters. I very much like the story they told in these volumes, but it must be said that the development and focus on the regular cast, and team RWBY in particular, has suffered for it. It’s not a deal breaker for me personally, but I do think it’s an issue.

So when I saw the finale episode only had about 20 minutes, I figured the best course of choice for RWBY would be to focus on the Atlas-only plots, and leave RWBY & co’s stories for the next volume, which by all accounts seems to be focused only on their character. And credit where credit is due, this is what RWBY decided to do with this finale. This doesn’t really solve the underlying issue that the main cast has yet again been relegated to such a minor role in their own show, but I can live with it.

I still do have a problem with how RWBY’s role in this finale was handled, and forgive me because this might be the least well-explained part of this review. The best way to describe it would be that, though I know I’m watching team RWBY, they don’t feel present in the finale? I struggle to put my finger on it, if it’s more an issue of direction or execution, but something about RWBY’s fight felt off for me.

By comparison, when I think of the episode before, I don’t have this issue. While the way Yang fell isn’t RWBY’s best execution, the reactions of RWBY to that fall worked quite well. There was individual focus on Yang falling, Blake screaming and raging at it, Weiss’s heart breaking into two, Ruby falling into more despair - the tragedy works because of it. I don’t feel the same about the finale, RWB fall almost as if they’re passerby rather than the main characters.

Again, maybe this is just me, maybe I’ll change my mind later. Whatever.

I think Cinder is the one I’m most satisfied with. She seems in character, she acts a lot like she did in her confident state during Beacon, and I did get the impression Salem knows Cinder is lying to her. I admit that I did not expect this direction for Cinder, it seemed like the right spot to have her break free from Salem, but it’s too early for me to call where her arc is going to.

The only nitpick I have with Cinder is how she offed Arthur. I felt like it could have a little more focus? I get that his death is supposed to feel completely inconsequential, but I wish there was just a little bit more there. Again, only a nitpick.

Vine - I think my opinion on Vine’s death is quite unpopular. It felt too last minute, without enough setup. See, while killing Harriet here would have its own set of issues, she was well developed enough where you could actively feel for her, while also expecting a possible death. I can’t say the same about Vine; Vine is only a teensy bit more developed than Elm, which isn’t a lot. He’s making a huge sacrifice, but the lack of character makes him seem expendable by design. It feels like the writers put all their efforts into threatening Harriet’s life, realized last minute that actually they could a lot more with her character (good call), so they shoved in Vine in her place because they still needed a bomb sacrifice.

On the flip side, three of the Ace Ops surviving and proving once and for all they broke away from Ironwood too, with Harriet and Marrow still alive - that is good. I’m not sure what more they’re planning to do with their characters, but it’s preferable to far worse alternatives I can imagine. We’ll see.

Then there’s Penny. sigh

I’m not sure what I can add that P5, bell or cosmokyrin, and probably a few others haven’t already said, but I don’t think it was well written. The whole body-thing in “Creation”, sure, I can accept that was a difference of interpretation. This? This whole, let’s resurrect Penny, develop her immensely as a character, reaffirm her autonomy multiple times over, avoid multiple deaths, only to die like this?

I know the common comparison people make here is with V3, and I can see where people are coming from. After all, Pyrrha and Penny’s deaths were impactful and tragic there, and most people agree that was well written. What’s the difference here? Some differences in circumstance are worth visiting here.

Penny of the Beacon era, lovable character that she was already, was not the most developed character. At the end of the day, most of what we knew of Penny then was in relation to Ruby - we knew Ruby cared for her a lot, we knew why they bonded, so we had setup as to why her death would impact the Fall so much. It works, because it gave enough focus on her for us to care about, but not overly so where the shocking factor of the Fall wouldn’t work.

With Pyrrha, I think we all knew the signs were there at the end of the day. I’d argue that Pyrrha’s very conception as a character lead to her death, she was just slightly too perfect for us not to expect a tragedy to occur. Importantly, her major arc in V3 sets us up to her death - through her conversation with Ozpin’s gang and Jaune, the introduction of Ember and the soul transfer device, killing Penny - by the time Pyrrha dies you’re prepared for it, and it still hurts. Even if the tragic scenario presented (losing Pyrrha because of the soul transfer) wasn’t the one used, dying because she tried defending the use of those powers from Cinder made sense. It was enough of a switch you weren’t bored because you expected everything to go to plan, but it wasn’t too drastic where you felt completely unprepared for what would happen.

The trouble with how Penny’s death was handled here, is in part because they just kept pushing us to the edge, making us worry about one tragic scenario, another way for Penny to die, only to alleviate our fears - only to kill her off anyway in a completely separate way. It happened so often in these two volumes, when we were already fresh off recognizing Penny wasn’t dead in V3, that rather than feeling like an expected death that is tragic, is feels like they toyed with out perception constantly only because they could. When you raise and lower death flags over and over in such a small amount of time, the tragedy you aimed to convey is lost. Perhaps unintentionally, the point no longer seems to be telling a tragic story, it’s only playing this cruel game of perception with the audience. What’s the joke about Jean Grey in x-men, that she keeps being killed off and resurrected so often it’s hard to care about it all? Is this how I’m supposed to look at Penny, RWBY’s Jean Grey?

Granted, I’m not sure that if they committed to one consistent death threat with Penny and followed through, that necessarily would’ve been better. I’m not sure how I’d think of RWBY if she died from the virus, for example. At least, however, I’d be more confident in saying that was a difference of direction, rather than a difficult writing choice to comprehend.

It’s only fitting I’d talk about Winter now, huh? I think you all know my stance about her as a character, I’d argue that she, Ironwood and Cinder were the best handled characters in these two volumes by a fair margin, but the finale leaves me very conflicted about her.

On the one hand, it’s everything I want. Winter’s confrontation with Ironwood is like a mix of Blake facing off against Adam and Yang confronting Raven, and while not as impactful in terms of storytelling, they do deliver on the same fronts. Winter calls out Ironwood for his lies, establishing once and for all it was by her volition she broke off, her conscience that was always better, and there is something poetic about her gaining the Winter Maiden powers to fulfill her goal of protecting others.

...but I can’t separate this from Penny’s fate. And it frustrates me to no end, because I love her connection to Penny, I made comparisons of how it reminds of Bumbleby’s relationship, it drives their characters forward so much, heck, I like that Penny took a part in taking down Ironwood with Winter, in a sense. But because Penny’s death feels so contrived, its connection to Winter almost cheapens the importance of their relationship with each other. And it doesn’t seem quite needed either, since they individually as characters already broke free from Ironwood.

I can sort of see that I am supposed to interpret it as a tragedy, and I do indeed think Winter getting the Maiden powers is tragic for her character (not unlike Spring Maiden!Yang theories), and I am excited to see where this is going. I thought this was the end for Winter’s major impact on the story, but there’s a whole other arc waiting, and Penny’s a major part of it too.

To say I’m conflicted about Winter would be an understatement.

The actual silver lining, for me, is the post credit scene. Volume 9 is an opportunity for RWBY to try and change some of the problem I presented initially. My hope is that by focusing almost exclusively on team RWBY, with Jaune and Neo, and putting less emphasis on developing the settings of giant-tree-land and not over-complicating the plot. Hopefully, this would allow them to focus on developing the main cast again, in in particular addressing some of the main issues presented; notably, the Bees confessing, Ruby maybe reaching her breaking point, Yang’s issues being addressed, and hopefully something more individual for Blake and Weiss as well. Neo is an interesting curveball to throw into this equation, and I have a decent amount of hope with Jaune (although then I remember it’s probably going to be about Penny, and, ugh...).

Yeah, that’s all I have at the moment. If you want to talk about it, my inbox and DM’s are always open. If you disagree with me that’s fair, just give me the minimal amount of respect rather than being an ass about it.

[k-itsmaywriting]

AnS Fic Rec Bingo

A fic that got you involved in fandom: Drink Deep of Lethe by @sabraeal​ | T In short: it has everything I love about early Shirayuki, early Obi, and early Obiyuki. Two people, both on the run, meeting in the deep Wood and converging paths by pure chance. It’s such a fun read!! I first read this on Obiyuki Week 2016 and was just so inspired that I was like “man, I really want to write something for this event too” :D So that is how it got me involved in the fandom.

Made you laugh out loud: I Should’ve Met You Yesterday by @bubblesthemonsterartist | E First of all, I eat ‘Obi gets a support system kicking and screaming’ with a spoon. Second, and more specific to this bingo square, bb Aki is an agent of love and chaos and Obi has absolutely 0 game when it comes to Shirayuki. And it’s the cutest and funniest story!!! Things that made me laugh include: the entire chapter Obi and Aki meet Zen and Mitsuhide, “Here lies what was left of Obi’s game” scene, and Aki trying to get dada to kiss Shirayuki’s booboo, AND MUCH MORE.

Favourite trope reversal: An Earthly Knight by @claudeng80 | T I find fae stories really intriguing and interesting even though (or maybe even because) I know like, the bare minimum of background info. Like they’re just so cool and fun. ANYWAY, I loveddddd how even though Obi is Shirayuki’s guard, this fic is her trying to rescue him in a way only she can - with DETERMINATION and IMMENSE BRAVERY <3 A beautiful story.

Action-packed fight scene: The Moon, the Window, the Knife by @glitter-and-golden | G Over 2000 words and my breath was held the entire time. A super cool fic about Wistal castle being attacked by NINJAS which also means OBI BADASSERY :’D But also it’s not Obi if he doesn’t get hurt in the process and him and Shirayuki protecting each other, because we love that food. Delicious. 5 stars.

Gen fic: It’s a Difficult Conversation by @nebluus | T A DIFFICULT CONVERSATION IT WAS INDEED. For Ryuu, being barely a teen who has people he really looks up to, seeing those people hurt is rough. And for a healer, not being able to help them in the way he knows best is DOUBLEY ROUGH. But I just love that Shirayuki sits with him and explains this very hard stuff about trauma in the most compassionate and understanding way.

Canon divergent: i am become death by @bubblesthemonsterartist | M So in 2017 Bubbles and ISM decided to have an angst battle and the rest of us took a ton of collateral damage to the emotions like NYC at the end of an Avengers movie. In answering the question ‘what if Obi didn’t find Shirayuki in time during Tanbarun arc?’, Bubbles weaves this piece of Absolute Art and it’s just...amazing. Horrifies me in the best of ways.

Wept real tears: Nothing Was My Own (Before I Loved You) by @sabraeal | T Specifically, Making Good made me cry real tears. We love a good slow burn, especially that moment where one of them realises they’re in love with the other and just HOW important they are in their life. It’s beautiful and moving!! And also has fluffy AND funny Obiyuki moments that make me squeal. But also the entire WFB series is an AMAZING fic of everybody’s journey thru college and young adult lives and I think about it all the time.

FREE SPACE: The Most Versatile of Guards by @claudeng80​ | T A favourite of mine!!!!! :DD So many fun and cool adventure times with herbwitch!Shirayuki and shapeshifter!Obi and I loveddd the Mihaya interludes. The entire world is just so creative and seeing all the characters as different beings is so much fun. And their romance makes me SQUEEEEEEE.

Fav fanmade OC: I gotta give this one to Aki from I Should’ve Met You Yesterday. Number one precious bb with the MOST personality and he’s so much fun to read.

First AnS fic you read: The Automation Heart by @infinitelystrangemachinex | T The first chapter ALREADY had me wrecked. In general AND for this ship. I am also due for a reread. But I remember reading all the chapters that were published then in a single night just being like “oh my god this is so good. MOAR PLS” *clicks next chapter*

Favourite minor character: Garack Gazelt, particularly in The road to Clarines is gravel (M) by @codango​, (don’t go) making something out of nothing (T) by @sabraeal, and Dead Men Tell No Tales by @bubblesthemonsterartist (T) (the last which I need to go into the AO3 comments and yell about because OHHHH MY GOD). I always love seeing her. She’s badass and smart and amazing and every time I see her I go *heart eyes*

WIP: Damned by @ruleofexception​ | No rating ZOMBIES ARE SCARY BUT YOU KNOW WHAT’S ALSO SCARY??? BEING ALONE. AND HAVING YOUR FREEDOM TAKEN AWAY. But no really I love sooo many things about this fic, like the wonderful Found Family, tragic backstories and some amazing story arcs. I look forward to every time this updates.

Canon compliant: Knots by @krispy-kream | G ABSOLUTE FANDOM CLASSIC 10/10. I just love how it all starts as a game for him. Because why take it seriously when he can’t have her for real? AND THEN HE GOES OH SHIT, OH FUCK I’M IN TOO DEEP. And things just unfold wonderfully from there!!!!! Like it’s such a classic “Obi is wrecked and he is slowly losing it with how much he likes his Miss”.

One-shot: Life Eternal by @ruleofexception​ | No rating Devil!Obi and Angel!Shirayuki is just...THE MOST WONDERFUL OF CONCEPTS. And not only are they on opposite sides, working against each other to either make people’s lives better or worse, she becomes a literal devil’s GUARDIAN ANGEL. And that makes way for such an interesting story and I love its open end <3 It was a really fun fic!!

Rare pair: Cookies for Shikito (Shirayuki x Shikito) by @claudeng80​ | G PLS THIS FIC IS SO FLUFFY <3 <3 <3 They’re such a cute ship. Just two absolute cinnamon buns spending time together while Shirayuki makes cookies and Shikito PROTECCS. They’re so fluttery and adorable!!!!!!! I love it!!!!!!!!

AU you took a chance on and now love: Sic Semper Monstrum by @sabraeal​ | T I simply do not know many Things, including common source materials for AUs. Including Pacific Rim, which I still haven’t watched (but need to, PROBABLY) but I. LOVE. THIS. AU. The importance that is placed on intimacy and emotional connection with the entire concept of drifting and also just like, life in general??? I thoroughly enjoy (as always) the exploration of everyone’s thoughts and backstories and relationships and also psychologist!Shirayuki <3

Pre-canon: ashes in the mouth, char the tongue by @infinitelystrangemachinex | T Both a pre-canon (childhood friends) and future fic!! The summary explains it better than I could: “Obi finally takes Shirayuki back to Tanbarun, but she gets more than she bargained for.” This fic ruined me (in a good way) and kicked my heart out of my chest and it rolled into a gutter (in a good way) and I almost missed my tram stop the first time I read it because I was so wrapped up in it. It was a RIDE.

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket SE02 (ep,9). part 1

You know it’s real when kyo is given monologue right from the beginning! It rarely happens that he’s allowed any!, but when he does, it hits like a wild wave changing everything. The story is never the same after each time he’s given inner-talk. Forever changing the dynamics, the secrets & the relationships. e.g. true form ep.

Kyo’s love confession:

The sweetest, most tender love confession from the character that started the show fighting & screaming! The one that hated himself the most! now loves his name, only cuz she said it! “a special ring to it”. the guy who couldn’t look at her face, will repeat stupid things over “if it made you smile”. “Since when did I started” falling in love with you? the show goes on to show us various moment from as early as ep,4 & throughout seasons & scenes! he doesn’t know! We, the viewers, also don’t know when he started loving her!! we kinda gradually~ normally~ unknowingly~ fell in love with them together. The show opened this heavy ep filled with first-hand experience & steps on how Akito destroyed his victim... ouch! well-played, furuba! well-played.

The location: An empty room, no furniture, small, suffocating. The abuser sits far, then slowly walks towards the prey until there’s no space. But not before causing  physical pain to reassure dominance over the victim.

STEP 1: (The BET).

Kyo in his attempts to fight his destiny has met up with Akito prior to the beginning of the story, to defy him. Akito cleverly traps kyo into a bet manipulating his desire to break away from his fate. you said, YOU can fight your destiny? ok. I’ll let you. If you win against yuki, I’ll let you be free. easy, right? kyo this is your chance to prove yourself to yourself! just practice & win a stupid match. EASY! except it isn’t. The rat is superior to the cat. Your trials are in vain. you’ll NEVER rise up to anything except a failure. Try for three years! so generous of Akito! 36 months! you only need to win once! But you WON’T EVER! planting a toxic seed that eats away the victim’s self-esteem, hope & desire. Give him the chance to believe in himself then CRUSH IT. Once kyo fails, he’ll never believe in himself again. The bet is now cancelled before the third year even begins! one year & a half of failure is enough. You LOST. The Directing was phenomenal! The scene is shot in shades of sickening green, with underwater feel, like kyo is drowning deep in Akito’s abuse. Akito was shown from kyo’s perspective. Distorted, scary & demonic. like a monster..

STEP 2: (the past)

Taunting kyo with selective words that hit exactly were it hurts the most, using affirmative sentences in calm authoritative tone, alluding to facts.“cuz you’re a monster, ur mom is dead” “it was ur fault” “u killed ur mom”. Akito painted kyo’s mom in martyr light. giving birth to a monster, admirably protecting & raising him. Her reward? DEATH due to immense pressure from being WITH him. Extra step: painting kyo as the unforgivable & unappreciative son “ her son didn’t even mourn her” cuz kyo didn’t cry in front of others in her funeral. all these words carved his psyche like daggers extracting buried memories of his dad doing like Akito. YOU caused ur mom grief. the memory is now crystal clear. His mom walking slowly with open arms towards death. Giving kyo her back knowing he’s there. choosing to abandon & leave him. cuz it is HIM that is too much to bear. it is HIM that she’s escaping from.

STEP 3: (the present)

“you should’ve died”, “if you didn’t exist EVERYONE would be happy” This everyone in particular destroyed kyo way more than Akito ever planned for. Everyone includes the present. Everyone includes ppl who aren’t sohma-related. Everyone includes a happy mother & daughter. Everyone includes kyoko & tohru. It is NOW that kyo crashes, falls, loses & bends. Kyoko is the nail in his coffin. Akito lets go of kyo’s hand. Mission accomplished.

-Miscalculation in Akito’s plan: (tohru)

Akito unwittingly ruins her plan by mentioning tohru. her triumphant smile disappears & her authoritative powerful voice turns into childish screams to silence kyo, pathetically covering her ears. This drastic shift in power resulted only by mentioning tohru. Realizing that tohru was used as tool for whatever reason gave kyo strength to stand up & defend her. how dare you call her a monster? how dare you call her an angel? NO. she is but a human. A kind soul. That stayed WITH me regardless of all my ugliness inside & outside. WHY? who does that? Who gives & never takes? the foolish traveler.

The foolish traveler’s role in liberating & confiding kyo:

In momiji’s story, the foolish traveler gives the monster her life & dies. Tohru gave kyo her presence. She did NOT heal him or fade the ugliness away. NO. She didn’t treat his trauma. NO. she doesn’t even know abt his mom’s suicide!! she ONLY gave him her presence. She stayed with the monster. WHY? cuz she is a foolish person filled with kindness not wanting anything in return. But what happened to the the foolish traveler at the end of momiji’s story? she died. again DEATH surrounds kyo. If this foolish traveler stays with him death awaits her. History has proven kyo’s company lethal. the cat has cursed his most beloved ppl into death & harm. his dad, mom, kyoko. This story made kyo realize his romantic love to tohru & tragically made him understand the possible sad ending.

Akito’s Rebound:

Akito sizes the chance, strikes back & regains power. Like a hungry monster smelling fear! “ do u think u have the right to fall in love with someone?” “do u think you’re allowed?” Kyoko, reinforcing Akito’s words.”I won’t forgive you”. you, the monster knows love?? “who’s the real villain” you, the killer! “who’s the one who involved her the most” You, the most cursed! “it’s best if you are gone”.” I KNOW!” ,kyo said.

The fighter gives up:

“it was me”. every negative thought kyo has is reinforced by a past experience from someone in his life. Akito blackmails kyo into accepting his confinement in exchange of NOT harming tohru. It is becuz kyo finally loved someone enough to want to EXIST in this word that he finally stops fighting. He fought for years for himself. Now, he’ll give up for another person. Tohru’s love liberated him from hating himself enough to die or take his hatred on someone else, but, her love also imprisoned him into thinking he’ll never be worthy for her. His first thought upon seeing her is “ I want to be with u forever” but once again “ kyoko shows up reminding him” i wont forgive you” How can kyo wish to be with her? his entire trauma is against it. does he has the guts to rip tohru’s smile once he confess abt the past? What does he expect tohru to say once she knows? How would tohru react? he’ll scar her forever more than she’s already scarred. Those scars that she hides oh so well from others will become tragically apparent once he confess. So, No, kyo. Spare her the pain. who are you anyway? a mere monster that everyone will be happy if you disappeared” “why didn’t my mom kill me?” “she should’ve killed me” If she did.. then tohru would’ve been happy with her mom. “Why am I still alive?”

Kyo’s precious flower:

love is against logic. Logic says stay away from tohru & spare her ur unworthy existence. Love says look for her! love makes you run to her! love makes you want to see her first thing after getting out of the that room. love says cherish her, be around, stay with her. Love says she needs you! yes, the unworthy monster has been loved before! way before tohru!. Kazuma flashes in his mind & brings hope, Kyoko, flashes with a kind smile, teasing him, I see different hair styles, maybe repeatedly meeting kyo, love reminded kyo of the friend-kyoko! who recognized his loneliness, patted his head, reached out to him, she told him abt the tiny flower, showed him her most precious treasure. These ppl treated him as a human! NOT a monster, kazuma, kyoko & tohru, love opened his eyes to see the light amidst the darkness, the warmth of the sunset after the depth of suffocation. He won’t give up on life. NO, he wants to LIVE, to LOVE & to give back! he now knows that his existence isn’t completely worthless! he was there for tohru. he has already given her back time after time since they’ve met, he knows that! he made her smile, he saw her! the real her! tiny, foolish & oh so precious!  By the time he reached her he was able to genuinely smile from his heart! yes, he can smile cuz she’s with him now. He doesn’t care anymore abt the disgusting sohma & their curse. He only cares abt her. he won’t trample his precious flower, “ i once hoped to be always together, far away” to “ make you my own” But NO. he can’t hurt her with the painful memories, he’ll treat her with utmost respect, care & love until its time to say goodbye. quietly exiting from her life. As long as she’s not harmed. As long as her smile stays, so, he’ll stay with her together,” until we’re separated far apart”

[angelfire115]

The deal that will last for eternity

"Are you sure you want this my dear?"

"Yeah.... I'm sure"

Angel stood with Alastor in his room, his body slightly shaking as he did. Alastor however, was completely composed. He had his award winning smile, plastered on his face with glee. He did however, feel bad for the poor spider who had witnessed such a tragic thing over a week ago. Angel recalled it like a terrible nightmare come too life. Seeing his family all bloodied and dead on the floor. His twin sister, Molly, dead in his arms, covered in her blood. His brother, Arackniss, barely being able to talk, telling him to run and then breathing his last breath as his body went limp. He didn't run but he somehow survived.

The thought of it alone made Angel lose all sense of rhyme or reason, he'd fall into seizures and panic attack so often, it was almost cruel to keep him alive. Alastor knew of this, so much more detailed then anyone could believe. He didnt want to see his love like this but he had no idea how to comfort him in any way since he's never fell in love before. Even if Angel didn't know he was in love or even if he didn't feel the same way, it didn't matter, if there was anyway he could help his pain, he would do anything.

And he was excited to know he could since Angel had asked for a deal. A deal to have his memory removed or blocked of the event or at least changed to something more manageable where he didn't feel the most immense amount of pain from just thinking about it. Alastor so badly wanted to comfort him since he shook so bad he looked like he could collapse but business was first. Alastor: "So you want your memories removed or altered so you can stop this pain?". Angel nodded slowly, he was tired, he looked tired, it needed to be over soon or he might collapse and break down in another fit once more. Alastor knew this but he had to make sure Angel was okay with this. To alter his memory or to completely forget his families death was not exactly ideal. In the real world, he would get help and medicine for his mental condition but this was hell, nothing like that existed here. This was a close substitute though.

Alastor was thrilled as well, to make a deal with him meant he was to own Angel dust and his entirety, a bond so strong, it persists even after they both suddenly stop existing. Like its the last and only piece which they do exist, together forever. He maybe calm on the outside but his insides burned with passion. He couldn't wait but he was a patient person and patients was key. Angel dust: "I know its stupid but what choice do I have, I can't... I can't live like this forever".

Angel flopped down on his bed, holding his head in his hands, almost about to cry. Alastor sat beside him. He reached out to comfort him but retracted, not knowing how he would react to it. Angel wiped away the tears that started to form and sighed, breathing slowly to settle himself. Angel dust: "I need to go through with this, its the only way". Alastor hummed in response, his insides screaming since he sat next to him, on his bed. Angel dust: "Hey Al... Will it hurt? The deal? What will happen to me?". Alastor opened his eyes to stare at the floor in thought. Alastor: "It doesn't hurt, it will slowly take affect and our agreement will be fulfilled however, a part of you will become a part of me. So simply saying, you give me something in return for the deal, as an equal exchange. At times, I can summon you anywhere if I need help with a battle or something else important that requires your skills or I could use your power for my own use at time but that won't affect you in anyway, you'll just be aware that I'm using it and nothing more. Of course, I don't intend on using you for battle or anything like that unless completely necessary, you can live for the rest of your life as you used too, you won't be affected by anything at all, I promise you that".

It was quite informative and Angel was quite surprised over this but it did seem alright for him. It also seemed fair, he was asking for a lot so he had to give a lot in return. With another deep breath, he stood up, shaking a lot less then before to his and Alastors relief. Angel dust: "Alright, I will agree to your deal, smiles". Angel tried to be witty like he use too which sort of worked. Alastor however, his heart almost burst from his chest. He said yes, yes for him to be apart of him, to have a bond stronger then marriage. He couldn't help but shine with excitement.

He hopped up and held out his hand, his hand slightly glowing green. Alastor: "So, its a deal then?". The energy emmiting from his hand burst, making a sort of mini tornado as strong winds and force flowed out. Fat nuggets squealed, disturbed by everything happening so he ran under the bed for protection. Alastor could have toned down the amount of energy flowing out but he was too excited to hold back. Angel was hesitant at first but closed his eyes and reached for his hand. When he finally grabbed it, the green light shot another shine then disappeared completely. Angel opened his eyes back as the light was gone and looked around surprised. Angel dust: "Huh, that was easy, didn't think it would be". Still holding his hand, Alastor looked a bit disappointed. Sure he made the deal he wanted but it still felt anticlimatic. What could he possibly do to make sure this went all smoothly and right for him?

Angel dust wasn't bothered or at least didn't realize his hand was still being held by Alastor. Angel dust: "So uh, when's this magic thing gonna wo-". Angel was suddenly pulled in by Al into a kiss. Before he could do anything else or fight back, Alastor moved closer and held the back of his head so he couldn't break free. Angel didn't know what to do, even with his 6 arms, there was no way he could break free. When Alastor finally let go, he moved his hand to Angels waist to keep him close, he wasn't done yet. He interlocked his fingers with Angels with the hands he and Angel used for the hand shake. Their hands now sat inbetween them, burning inbetween their warm bodies.

Angels face burned like a wild fire on his face, he could barely comprehend what just happened. Alastor stared right into his eyes, not looking away even for a second. The gentle lowered eye look sent a shiver throughout Angels body, his hair standing on end. Angel dust: "W-what w-w-w-was that f-for?". Angel was shaking again, but not from anxiety and depression, no, from his beating and flushed cheeks and confused and spinning mind. Alastor: "Well, I thought the hand shake was too anticlimactic so I made it more exciting. Angel, the deal you agreed to has more meaning then just me summoning you and such, it created a powerful bond, a part of you is now a part of me and a part of me is now a part of you. This bond is even stronger then marriage, it will last even if both of us die in hell, our souls intertwined with each other will never break apart".

Alastor moved his hand from Angels waist to his cheek, cupping it while also stroking his plushy and soft skin. He leaned closer, squeezing his hand that was between them both, while placing his forehead on his. Alastor: "You, Angel dust, are finally mine".

Fic inspired by

@stagtic

And

@multicoloredhorses-andfriends

Rp they did together

[severalspoons]

Liveblog: Rewatching Trigun, Episode 20

Surprise, this blog series continues! I have no intention of letting it end at episode 19. (I mean, that’s not even a nice round number!) While these aren’t liveblogs any more, they still give me an opportunity to discuss meta. 

Life lesson learned: once you start a series of anything, do not stop until it’s finished--no matter what other projects come up, no matter how shiny they are, and no matter how much you’re dreading watching episode 23. Since I do my best work when feeling inspired, I hate to wait and let my enthusiasm for the new project cool, but jumping ship only ends in two unfinished projects instead of one.

This is going to be arranged by theme, not so much chronologically. Also, it ended up being more about Wolfwood than originally intended.  Including a spoiler, so be careful.

Millie’s Transmitter

Millie reports that the Chief of Bernadelli gave her a transmitter/tracking device, which must be a rare, valuable piece of technology -- to prevent anyone from outwitting her. Meryl replies that this is nothing to brag about. I disagree.

First of all, the chief cares about her enough to entrust her with this bragworthy technology. She must have earned his trust and good opinion, also an achievement. He could easily punish or fire her, but instead gives her a tool to perform better. Countless people with learning disabilities dream of bosses like this. 

People tend to take a harmful all-or-nothing attitude towards disabilities. Either PWD are incapable of doing things and nothing can be done about it, or they are capable of doing things, and shouldn’t need help. Since people with disabilities themselves live in society, they end up indoctrinated and taking the same attitudes towards themselves. Shame and self-hatred often result. People strive for years, often with therapy, to get to the matter of fact acceptance Millie shows here.

***

Vash in Hell

Everything is red, from the beginning. The sand, himself and his clothes, the sky. Knives comes into view, blurry and mostly in shadow, only one eye visible.  What looks like meteors, probably chunks from the ships, fall through the sky like rain. We’re seeing from Vash’s point of view.

When waking Vash, Knives’ voice is normal, sounding like a real child. It doesn’t change to his growly evil voice until Vash accuses him of being a murderer. Then, his eye loses its pupil, and he suddenly appears to have fangs. He looks like he’s become some sort of monster. Not human, as Vash says.

Knives beats him up for even daring to compare him to a human. What hurts the most about this is you know it’ll be a long time, and probably many more such beatings, before Vash leaves.

Was it ever possible to take care of Knives? Was Rem’s last request reasonable?

Vash announces he’s finally ready to face Knives. What impresses me most: he’s finally making a significant decision for himself.

***

Meet the Folks

How is Vash more attractive in normal clothes than his signature coat, even in scenes showing only his face? Speaking of which, this episode is full of beautiful shots of Vash’s face. Wolfwood’s, too. 

How the hell did Wolfwood get here? He said he was concerned about Vash crying then jumping off a cliff, and followed him. However, he seems to have climbed up from below. How would he have found a floating platform? Certainly, none is visible below him. And since he seems to know nothing about the flying ship, he can’t have taken Vash’s strategy and jumped onto a platform at just the right time. 

“Come meet the folks!” Yes, they actually do have a summer cottage in the sky. Ever wonder why Vash’s head is always in the clouds? ;) 

Wolfwood actually says “I’m getting sick of your lies.” Hypocritical much?

Wolfwood is the first guest Vash has brought “home” in over 20 years (in other words, since he became The Stampede)! 

Does that mean that the whole time Vash has been on the run, he hasn’t visited the SEEDS ship (probably to prevent anyone tracking him from discovering it)? Vash could have simply hid out for the last 20 years in the SEEDS ship; it’s his home, after all. Instead, he chose to go out and protect people from Knives, and each other. (How many of us would have made the same choice?)

***

Inside Legato’s Lair

What does this informant know about Chapel’s duties? From the way Legato dismisses his concerns, it seems like Knives’ followers aren’t given much information about each other.

Wolfwood is now doomed. “You’re such a fool. Had you behaved, you might have lived to see Doomsday. But I’m pleased, for I now have the opportunity to carry out another of my master’s wishes.” 

A surprisingly restrained evil chuckle from Legato. Thank you for sparing us a full-on villain laugh.

How does Legato get shoulder padding that sticks out that far? Each shoulder is almost twice as big as his head.

***

A Series of Awkward Events

The ship has a whole observation team. No one should be able to get up here without the SEEDS leaders knowing, right? Right? ...

The old man tells Brad Vash has changed over the years. How? 

After all this buildup, Brad opens the door, letting in blinding light, and this is what he sees:

The legend acting like an idiot and getting his butt kicked. Very dignified. 

This is Brad’s reaction:

“Is that your great legend?! Huh?!” “What a relief! He hasn’t changed at all.” (A relief? What were they afraid would have happened to him?)

Brad is not amused by Wolfwood’s touchy-feely ways.

“Who’s he?” Vash, looking embarrassed: “I’m not sure.” Fair enough, but not very helpful, and Wolfwood doesn’t elaborate. We already know and love Vash’s embarrassed grin, but I can’t get over Wolfwood’s almost sinister smile in the mirror. 

A cute moment where Vash looks back like, “isn’t my place great?” and Wolfwood just gapes like an idiot. (Close your mouth, my dude. Flies are gonna get in). 

Vash last visited about 20 years ago, and Jessica was a small child then, so she should be about 23 or 24. However, she looks and acts like a teenager. Vash inadvertently becomes part of an unwanted love triangle.

To his credit, Vash tries to put her off, in a joking way (”I have a reputation for being easy but even I need a bit of advance warning”). Wolfwood makes the whole situation worse by teasing Vash about his “girlfriend” in front of a fuming Brad. It’s as if he were going out of his way to antagonize the people on the ship.

When Vash actually has a chance to look at Jessica’s face, he remembers her. Think about that. He may only have met her once, it’s been 20 years, and he still recognizes her and remembers her name. How many other people does he remember from the past ~130 years? This is how he uses his powerful plant brain--Knives would view it as a waste.

Jessica cooks a feast for Vash, which, tragically, he won’t get to enjoy. How did she cook all this food so fast? It’s enough to feed the whole ship.

***

Wolfwood is mistrusted for the wrong reasons

Wolfwood actually takes off his shades and armor of acting like a jerk while introducing himself to Jessica. This is unusually open and vulnerable of him. He actually is trying to behave. But Brad, worried about “a bunch of outsiders” bringing war to their flying paradise, hits him where it hurts.  

...Did I mention Wolfwood has beautiful eyes?

Anyway, everyone gathers around staring at Wolfwood from a distance, while he drops cigarettes on the ground. There’s an entire pile lying at his feet. The whole scene is the definition of passive aggressive. 

What seems to anger Wolfwood is not so much how they treat him personally, but their denial combined with moral superiority. Not to push a metaphor too far, but these folks are able to take the moral high horse because their literal high position keeps them safe. Yet, they use this immense privilege not to help the world below, or to prepare for the ship’s inevitable fall, but to hide in their castle in the sky. It clicks for me that Wolfwood probably feels about running away the way Vash does about suicide (think back to episode 11). 

The SEEDS dwellers do not seem to understand that Wolfwood is both trying to help them and a little resentful of what they have. To them, he is everything they’ve been taught to fear and hate, up here poisoning Paradise for them with his unpleasant ideas. Of course this sort of dynamic never happens in real life.

Also, keep in mind that none of them know anything about the people below directly, only from hearsay. They’re not wrong about Gunsmoke as a whole, but they treat Wolfwood like a monster rather than a person.  That also never happens in real life.

Then he gets to the scene of a crime too late--but just in time to look like the one responsible. Although the ship dwellers would love to see him dead, he leaps to defend them against his own colleague. Knowing, perhaps, that doing this would confirm he switched sides, and his own days might be numbered. He doesn’t even pause to think, he just goes, the same way he did when the child went missing in episode 9.

***

Vash Will Save The Day

“Like you care. Five years is probably like a blink of the eye to you anyway.” Vash denies it, but the second part is probably true. He looks so surprised to hear it’s been five years.

It can’t be easy for Vash to admit that he was responsible for the “Fifth Moon Incident,” and is probably more dangerous than Knives. Once again, his only argument is “please.” But there’s no buffoonery or melodrama here. He’s dead serious, and that’s more convincing. 

Wolfwood tries to stop Leonoff from saying his name. No one who would understand the significance or matters to him is present, just Brad and Jessica. Is he merely afraid others will hear? Does he still consider himself to be Chapel?

Even facing Leonoff, Wolfwood still hasn’t put his shades back on.

Now imagine if Vash managed to find ways out of no-win situations and save the day without all the whining and crying.

Wolfwood can pause and wait for once, having faith that Vash will show up. He knows there’s always a third option for Vash. He does not yet see any for himself. Still, progress nonetheless.

***

Unfortunately for me, Vash is back with his red coat in Vash the Stampede mode, yellow glasses hiding his face.

OK, I can see how Leonoff’s puppets get into the ship without being noticed, but how on Earth did the big guy even get here?

[grandducktale]

“All Yet Seems Well” - Game of Thrones, Dexter, YGO, and the legitimately troubling trend and implication of “the problem play’s” re-emergence in pop culture

So first off, spoilers, naturally. Gonna be talking tragedy here. Also, cringe warning. I’m going to use mostly anime here. Kid cartoons, even.  But there’s a point to all this. If you were fans of Dexter or the television series “Game of Thrones”, any show that had more than anything an “unsatisfying finale” you might be able to pick up what I’m putting down.

What is a tragedy? The definitions vary, but it is a troubling or melancholic story with an unhappy ending. 

A Tragic Hero is easy enough to define. Hamlet from Hamlet, and Spike Spiegel from Cowboy Bebop. These two men are tragic because they pass away, and are unable to fully protect what they hold dear. But... I wouldn’t say they’re truly tragic. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t want to be either of them, but Spike Spiegal and Hamlet do to an extent accomplish some of their goals, and go out in a blaze of glory, score a moral victory, something.

(Pictured Above: Spike saying “Bang” as he bleeds out after killing his nemesis and destroying half a criminal empire in a wild one man blaze of glory)

This post is not about those characters. This post is not even about tragedy, necessary. This post is about problems. Problem plots, problem characters, and problematic implications. The title of this post is “All Yet Seems Well”, because the shows and the characters I am about to discuss are highly reminiscient of Shakespeare’s “Problem Plays.”

To start, let me bring up the character of Shouzu Hiiragi from Yu-Gi-Oh Arc-V(a cartoon about children playing competitive card games Konami makes to sell trading cards). Arc-V is basically the “problem play” of YGO, if said play had a caged gorilla break out and steal the spotlight for the last third of the performance. “Problem Play” is a vernacular used to refer to three of Shakespeare’s plays that couldn’t quite be pegged into tragedy or comedy, that provoked discussion either about the plot’s structure, the means used to resolve the problem, or both. For those not even slightly into Shakespeare, I’ve always viewed the operetta The Yeomen of the Guard as Gilbert and Sullivan’s “Problem Play”, so to speak, though Yeomen might as well be a straight up tragedy relative to Gilbert and Sullivan’s other works. 

But what makes a “Problem Play” a “problem play”, precisely? Well, since we’re talking about YGO Arc-V, lets go to Act V of one of Shakespeare’s “Problem Plays”, All’s Well That Ends Well. Act V, scene three, to be precise. 

King: Let us from point to point this story know, To make the even truth in pleasure flow: If thou beest yet a fresh uncropped flower, Choose thou thy husband, and Ile pay thy dower. For I can guesse, that by thy honest ayde, Thou keptst a wife her selfe, thy selfe a Maide. Of that and all the progresse more and lesse, Resoluedly more leasure shall expresse: All yet seemes well, and if it end so meete, The bitter past, more welcome is the sweet.

So to understand the “problem” with the above(besides finding a more contemporary translation and supplementing that with sparknotes, tvtropes, and google), one must understand the gist of the plot of “All’s Well That Ends Well.”

Basically, the protagonist of the play, a common girl by the name of Helena, has just prevailed in her desire to marry the love of her life, the highborne Ward of France, Bertram. The audience and the reader should in theory rejoice in such a moment. Helena was given the ability to choose her husband as a reward for saving the ill King, and though she picked Bertram and stipulated that he did not have to marry her, and though Bertram did not directly reject her but instead provided her with two nigh impossible tasks that required guile, intelligence, and strength to prevail, something just seems off. (Perhaps this is why the King says “All Yet Seems Well)

What is it that is off? Is it that Helena was for whatever reason the only one in France capable of curing the King? Is it that for someone as skilled and cunning  as Helena, telling Bertram he doesn’t have to marry her is pointless? Is it Bertram’s own psychological manipulation, to the point that even if these two people married and truly did love each other, that their happiness is a righteous person’s misery? That doubt, that uncertainty, the vague feeling that runs contrary to the overt, happy plot is what makes up a “Problem Play.” 

Shozu Hiiragi is tragic not because of a vague sense of malice or villainy inherent in his character like Helena. No, in fact, he is an authentic version of the “Noble Commoner” facade that makes Helena so problematic. YGO Arc-V is about a kid named Yuya trying to make it as an entertainer after his father left him at a very young age, vanishing into thin air. Yuya was bullied severely, and his father was supportive and this larger than life figure. Naturally, his abrupt disappearance was a traumatic event for Yuya.

Yuya compensates for this disappearance and his past by playing Pagliacci, a sad clown. The Pagliacci thing aside, the show makes it quite clear in the first three episodes that Yuya holds on so tightly to his identity as an entertainer because of the absence created by his father’s disappearance

Now before I get to Shouzu Hiiragi, I have to talk about Yuzu.  Yuya’s childhood friend and sweetheart is a girl named Yuzu Hiiragi. 

Shouzou Hiiragi is a lifetime friend and operator of Yushou’s entertainer school.  To summarize without being too spoilery, the audience eventually finds out that both Yuya and Yuzu are alot more important than they seem, and that they sort of just... appeared one day as babies. This is where Shouzu starts to become tragic, since we learn that not only did he raise a child that wasn’t his, he did so as a single father

 So Shouzu was second banana to Yushou, but he was an entertainer of some renown. He gave it up so he could raise his adopted child, and later on, act as the operator of “You-Show Duel School”, a school named after Yusho but ran by Shouzu since Yushou disappeared.

Now there’s a lot of issues with Arc-V. A lot, a lot, a lot, a lot. I am focusing on Shouzu but there’s so much to talk about with how this series has a lot of problems that its tone clashes far too hard with. But I’ll show a meme image out of context for the heck of it. 

I focus on Shouzu because he is the legitimate avenue towards Yuya and the show’s main conflict of balancing entertainment with legitimate hurt, dangerous conflict, and immense suffering and pain. He is a man who does good and puts his ambition aside out of alturism to start, but more than that, he is a genuine father figure to Yuya despite all that is on his plate. 

Like his costume of flame suggests, Shouzu is hot-blooded and passionate. As the plot progresses, Yuya struggles with doing what is right, being a good entertainer, preserving his father’s legacy, and a whole bunch of things. The advice of his father, Yusho, and the advice of his mother, Yoko, is to “smile when he feels like crying” 

This advice isn’t bad, but it is a crutch and a mantra for Yuya, one the direction of the show itself portrays as unhealthy and stunted. (When Yuya cries, he tends to wear his goggles so as to not let it show). So let’s analyze a sequence near the beginning of Arc-V’s 140+ episode. Yuya had obtained a special power like any Campbell Hero, but his rival, Reiji Akaba managed to copy said power in a duel against him(Which Yuya won, anyways albeit due to Reiji having bigger things to deal with)

Being bullied and having a traumatic past, then obtaining a special power unique to him that allows him to win duels, and then LOSING that special power, gets to Yuya a lot, even if he is plenty competent as a duelist.

So he runs away in tears.

Shozou hits Yuya with some facts about how naturally, if a technique or special ability in a game was discovered that gave someone an edge, it would only be a matter of time before other competitors used it too. But Shouzou then challenges Yuya to a duel, and instead of telling him to smile instead of cry, instead re-frames Yuya’s situation of losing his unique ability in a postive and constructive manner

A lot goes on in Arc-V, but the pendulum that Yuya swings back and forth on is the legacy of his father and becoming his own person. Shozou, who is Yuya’s de facto father, provides a path towards the latter. 

But... to make a long story short, Shozou is forgotten about. Yuya keeps chasing after his father, and the lesson he learned from Shozou is forgotten. Arc-V, which if you haven’t been able to tell from my essay on the main character’s girlfriend’s dad has an amazing ensemble cast, and spends 50 episodes developing these great ensemble characters.

But in the next 50 episodes, the ensemble characters fade into the background, and Yuya takes center stage only to repeatedly just smile and want to be like his father.

And in the last 50 episodes, the show gets downright mean spirited. A likable ninja character that has the design of a generic henchmen is killed off unceremoniously, an unlikable legacy character manages to shrug off that fate with ease. 

All the while, the show keeps this upbeat tone of optimism and Yuya triumphing.

And Yuya does triumph, he does save the day, but it’s all wrong. 

I am only skimming the surface here, but the reaction I saw and was invoked in me about Arc-V’s ending was the same reaction I saw with Game of Thrones’s ending.

Something along the lines of “I don’t mind a bad ending, so long as it is tonally consistent and not a confused mess!” 

Were this sentiment unique to Arc-V that’d be it. But it is applies to the end of Game of Thrones, Dexter, Netflix’s Watchmen, damn near EVERYTHING that was popular this past decade. This trend of something having a strong beginning and then fading into tonal nonsense, to the point that the viewers either speculate on finding the “true” “hidden” meaning of a piece

, or worse yet, an active desire for a bad or evil ending, so long as that evil at least makes sense

So I have a bad feeling about all of this. Not just because a series I liked went down the toilet, but because, well, remove all these other mainstream series with promising beginnings that nosedove into the ground and crashed and burned, and what’s the most recent universally acclaimed show left?

That’s it. Breaking Bad. A nihilistic story of personal triumph at the destruction of everything else. Which has its place. But with Arc-V, with Game of Thrones, with all these shows, I see a trend of the absurd entering and ruining a show, which leaves people craving order, even if that order is horrible.

I mentioned Gilbert and Sullivan before, so I’ll end this rambling essay with a quote from a song  from the Mikado that was allegedly almost cut from it.

“ My object all sublime I shall achieve in time — To let the punishment fit the crime — The punishment fit the crime; And make each prisoner pent Unwillingly represent A source of innocent merriment! Of innocent merriment!”

The Mikado is a tale about the absurd and chaotic, the same absurdity that seems to be turning audiences to darker, more orderly, things. But the Mikado showcases both the trouble of the absurd, and the genuine opportunity and chance for grace the absurd provides. 

In my opinion, Problem Play Plots are actually tragedies more tragic than regular tragedies. Borderline horror, even. They bring up problems, and the easiest solution to those problems seems to be that of tragic selfish scheming. But perhaps that needn’t actually be the case. That a benevolent and convincing solution to these problem plots exist - one people can accept, and be inspired by, in a good way. 

And if that can’t be done, if the trauma and chaos of these shows serves no point, then the Gordian Knot of problem play plots must be cut. The damage they have done must be acknowledged, the mystery boxes resolved or done away with entirely.

[t00-pi]

Estar fuera de anónimo me pone nerviosa pero eh. Ya que. Tengo una request en la que Shadow y la lectora son amigos cercanos y ambos trabajan en G.U.N., un día, mientras que los dos están en una misión, la lectora es herida gravemente, se recupera pero Shadow se siente terrible y ahí es donde ella quiere tratar hacerle hablar y Shadow explota, soltando que el gusta de ella y revelandole como sentía y entonces le confortamos. (Estaba inspirada lol, dime si crees que es muy detallado 😅)

Being out of anonymous makes me nervous but hey. As. I have a request in which Shadow and the reader are close friends and they both work in GUN, one day, while the two are on a mission, the reader is seriously injured, recovers but Shadow feels terrible and that's where she wants try to make him talk and Shadow explodes, letting go of his liking and revealing how he felt and then comforting him. (I was inspired lol, tell me if you think it's very detailed 😅)

it's ok hun! here you have it (the next post is going to be the original in spanish!)

Shadow T.H x Reader

"Protect you"

enjoy!💖

-----

Welcome to G.U.N, "Guardian Units of Nations" for its acronym in English. I work here as an agent for a few years now, doing my part to protect this world from constant threats, to protect people, and I am happy to do so!

  It seems that we are always in focus of some attack, because something new always happens, be they aliens, an ancient beast that rises to cover the world in darkness or, an obese human accompanied by a humanoid black hedgehog.

who would say it, that hedgehog joined us after a while.

Shadow became an official agent of G.U.N after a while of seeing us in action, just as we took the time to analyze whether to recruit him. I did not object sincerely, honestly it seemed great to have another mobian to work with.

because yes, I am one of the few humanoids here, one (f / a) to be exact. And while I get along almost with most agents (one of the keys to being here is teamwork), I was never completely close to any. After each mission it was and still strange to go out somewhere, to eat, to dance, nothing.

Nor can I boast of being the most sociable person in that regard, and Shadow was not in turn.

He did his own business and things in his own way, we seemed his assistants to some extent, I will not lie. His power surpassed almost everyone. But that's what happens when you're a lonely person, right? I suppose...

From the little we knew exactly about this coal hedgehog, it was that one of its notable characteristics was not that of working in a team. That if he had done it was in his own interest, and at first I doubted he was here for it. I don't know, but I missed something about him.

One day I decided to gather courage and face it.

Apart from the typical eye contact, or some words in certain missions to which we went along with other agents, we never started a conversation. It wasn't that easy anyway. And at first he didn't like me at all.

He did not like that I faced him clearly.

He said that he was only there to help fulfill a mission outside of G.U.N, and there it was. He did not deign to tell me anything else. The answer did not leave me at all calm either.

It was until they sent us on a mission together, alone, that we had to interact again. Neither of us wanted, but orders are orders.

It was not until I cut him off that Shadow realized that it was NOT HIS mission, but OUR mission. We were forced to work as a team even if he didn't like that.

At first he did not deign to answer, until he sighed and responded with a simple "ok".

And if we are done, it was a success!

Since then, Commander Tower has sent us both together to accomplish all kinds of missions, whatever. Even if we were accompanied, the requirement was that we were both in front. While I was in control and strategy, Shadow had the strength, and obviously, when the formula works, does it repeat itself?

At first we did not like this. Shadow still saw me bad just as I didn't want to have him close. But we get used to this routine of working together.

All this led to Shadow and I becoming close, I would say we became friends!

He was still the same cutting hedgehog that he showed to be from the beginning, but he was much more gentle with me. That I was around to open more with me, and I with him. He never wanted to tell me about that mission that did not belong to G.U.N, nor did those who knew tell me where he came from. But I tried to respect that, if it made him feel uncomfortable. Well, I saw how every time they spoke it I could lower my guard for a few moments, especially with that name.

"Maria".

The little I know about her is what Shadow himself told me, that he was her friend and that tragically died. Nothing else.

It is in those moments when I tried to comfort him, but he always rejected my attempts, my hugs, saying that he was fine, that he appreciated the fact of wanting to help. The few times I could get him to smile, even partially, they occurred at that time.

And I'm not going to lie, I enjoyed seeing that smile.

In the missions it became common for us to take care of our backs at all times, so as time progressed, I worried more and more about him, just as Shadow always looked and asked to be sure I was still there.

When I felt bad I could count on him to tell me something to help. He was not the best to give advice, in itself he's not good to tell how he feels in general, but my heart was glad only the fact that he wanted to help. I felt I had done well to face him on that mission. It was worth someone I could trust, even if sometimes I doubted him.

I didn't even know exactly what you felt for him, but I didn't pay much attention to him.

But everything changed.

It was a normal day, a routine mission. Shadow and I were together, about to enter one of Eggman's bases. Strange movements had been registered on the part of the doctor, and G.U.N wanted to make sure that another danger to humanity was approaching.

Everything went as usual, I analyzed how to go without being seen, the possibilities, while Shadow carried me in his arms so I could enter as quickly as possible. Whenever he did it, I blushed, today that has not changed either.

After a few moments, I told him where to go safely, where to leave me and what to do next. We would not separate unless necessary.

And it was. The base was immense, and we needed to travel it as soon as possible. A look and evidence was what we needed. However, we didn't even get to that.

My boots slipped and I fell to the ground, leaving me at the mercy of the security cameras. I got up and tried to get out of there quickly, while calling the hedgehog with a special watch on my wrist. It soon appeared, and charged me again to leave, however it was already late.

The alarm system had been activated, lasers everywhere.

While Shadow was able to dodge them, and we left, the missiles hit us before. One hit near us, and we both flew out together, I hitting my chest fully against a tree and falling from a considerable height. I started to lose consciousness at that moment. Shadow ran over, and the last thing I heard was his voice, worried, calling me repeatedly as I rose gently. After that, darkness.

I woke up connected to several machines, a serum bag, and a shadow next to me,holding my hand

At first I didn't recognize him, until I saw his red lines and his eyes . I could see his eyes light up when I smiled at him.

- What happened? - asked.

- I brought you Emergency here. You broke almost the entire ribcage, as well as some bones of the arm and pelvis. he replied.

I was shocked for a few moments, until I saw the bendages in my body, which I reacted again.

-Thank you...

-You don't have to thank me, it was my duty to protect you anyway. said the hedgehog from nowhere. I looked at him for a few moments, feeling like my heart was beating at those words. Silence invaded the small room for a few moments, until I asked:

-I can go back to G.U.N in no time, right?

-I don't know if you consider a few months for a long time.

-I don't believe it, as long as they don't cancel me ...

Shadow looked at me and lowered his head for a few moments, sighed and looked at me again.

-They won't unsubscribe you, but I'm not going to work with you anymore.

That hurt a lot more than my bones.

-But why? If it was a commander's decision I can go to ...

-It was my decision. - the hedgehog released, seriously, interrupting me, leaving me stunned for a few seconds. He stood up from his chair and opened the window.

-You don't want to work with me then?

-Not that, is that ... -he wanted to explain, however the words just did not come out. I could see it in his gesture, confused, frustrated.

-If it is because, I don't know, I'm very weak? You could always have told me that.

-No no, that's not why, let me explain it to you well ... -he looked increasingly frustrated.

-And then why is it? I asked annoyed.

Shadow exploded.

-I don't want to lose another loved one! I don't want you to be at risk of dying again because of me! I don't want you to be in the same position as Maria ... I can't lose someone I love again. - he exclaimed, while looking out the window, without being able to face me. His breathing was more agitated than normal, and he sighed so he could calm down and regain his composure again. He had been really vulnerable with me.

He said he loved me.

I watched him as my heart sped up even more. My cheeks were red like the color of their betas. The hedgehog continued.

-I ... my mission was to protect you, even when G.U.N didn't assign it to me like that. I was determined to make sure nothing happened to you. To do what I couldn't for Maria. That mission is what Maria left me. She would have wanted me to protect humanity and that I am trying to do. I can't alone, and in you I found someone who helps me to do it. Someone understanding, hardworking like You. Someone who knew how to make the best of me. I...

-Shadow, come closer. I said interrupting him. He looked at me confused. I put his hand between mine, and looked into his eyes. I sighed before releasing:

  -I love you, Shadow.

His lord changed to a surprised one, and when he relaxed him, he smiled.

-Me too, (Y / N). he replied, while kissing my forehead.

------

aaah, what memories ...

wait, we were talking about you being the new recruit right?

sorry! I'm really sorry, the same thing always happens to me. Come, I hope I didn't bore you, because you have so much here to hang out with!

[finita--la--commedia]

hello! back again to ask about Marina Tsvetaeva. I haven't read any of her work, and was wondering whether you still think starting with her letters would be best? (again, haven't read anything of hers)! If so, what letters would you specifically suggest to start with? otherwise, if u think beginning with some of her other work would be better - pls tell me what! thank you so much. Always in awe of your blog. many blessings x

[ it is going to be a lengthy post ]

Letters. Still – letters. Reading them, you will be able to see and feel her astounding, absolutely unique, “undressed” and tormented Soul and with that, to truly understand and feel through, – her prose and poetry … In her case, it is important.Everything about Tsvetaeva, you must feel and hear. Never “read” or, God forbid, -  ”understand”.   Here is the reference to the book of her letters on Goodreads:https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/283216.The_Letters_of_Marina_Tsvetaeva?ac=1&from_search=true&qid=fvbRr8HRYi&rank=2It contains 800 letters. I never read that translation and I pray to God, - it is good. You don’t have to read all of them, I will give you the list of the correspondents with the commentaries below, so you knew who those people were. Also, you can read the letters and other works, like poetry, at the same time. Why not ?But….  the letters – first 😊 The spelling of the names may slightly vary in that book. Note that all those letters she wrote while being married.  1. To Nikolay Gronsky (1909-1934). A must read. They met in Spring of 1928, in Paris. Gronsky was 18 and Tsvetaeva –  36. A young talented poet, he was later tragically killed in a metro accident: hit by a subway car in the Paris metro, he was just 25. A suspiciously strange accident, indeed ….  Yet, Tsvetaeva always believed it was, in fact – “an accident”. After he died, at the time, when their communications were already over, Tsvetaeva dedicated him a cycle of poems “Gravestone”:“Where did you go ? … Your soul —where did it go ? … Your face — where did it go ? Your face, your warmth,your shoulder — where did it go ?”

They took long walks and exchanged letters, which indicate that Tsvetaeva had a deeper attachment than that of a poetic master to a pupil, but by the late Autumn, their communication faded away … From her letter to him:“… a thirst for THAT OTHER self —not of the world of ideas,but of the chaos of hands and lips.

A thirst for the secret self.

The last self.

The imaginary self …”You can also read her letters to Pasternak, but I deeply dislike him as a person … for what he did to Tsvetaeva and what he did not do for her daughter and her son, because he was simply a disgusting coward. I do believe that Pasternak hugely contributed to what happened to her whole family, its tragedy and her suicide. By the way, the rope Tsvetaeva hanged herself on, was accidentally, given by Pasternak, when she needed to wrap her suitcase when evacuating. It is painful to read her Love letters to him, knowing all that and more. She was trustful and naïve. Not because she was a fool, but because she so strongly and stubbornly wanted to believe in the goodness of the humanity when there was and is – none.

2. To Rainer Maria Rilke (1875-1926)Her letters to Rilke are all over the Internet I gave you the link to their correspondence in my previous reply to you. They never met, but wrote to each other intensely from May 1926 until Rilke’s abrupt death in December of leukemia. During that correspondence, Tsvetaeva fell in Love with him. She was 34 and he was 51.

Quotes from her letters to him:“For my soul is well-bred.” “Rainer, dusk is falling, I love you.”“Beloved, come to me often in my dreams. No, not that. Live in my dreams. Now you have a right to wish and to fulfill your wishes”3. To Alexander Bakhrah (1902-1977)He was 20, she was 31. At that time, he was just a young critiс  Tsvetaeva had never met. She lived in Chekhia (Czechoslovakia) and he – in Berlin. She responded to his critical article on her poem and the epistolary affair had started. He published all her Love letters to him only in 1960 … “modestly” cut 1/3 out of them… 19 letters (1923), one (1924) and one (1928), when Love was already gone. Later those letters were re-published in full. No letters from him were saved.He caught her interest … and just like with Vishnyak and Pasternak before, and with Rilke, Shteiger, – later, she poured out at him all her immensity … And just like with everyone listed above, he simply couldn’t handle it.Then she met and fell in Love with someone else, in the real life: with Konstantin Rodzevich and this correspondence, as well as her Love to Bakhrah, – ended. Quotes from the letters to Bakhrah:“You have not understood my letter. You didn’t read it carefully. You didn’t take in my tenderness, nor my care, nor my human pain for you. You didn’t even understand me in myself: “and does it really matter - who is hurt ?!  - to experience someone’s pain as your own – all of it you didn’t get .”“I cannot love myself, because I love; and don’t want to, because I love him.”4. To Konstantin Rodzevich (1895-1988)She was 28 and he was 31. They met in 1923 in Prague.Years later, Tsvetaeva confessed that Konstantin Rodzevich was her only true Love in life: the man who cared less about her poetry and till the very old age never understood what she Loved him for. He believed that she created a person he was not and fell in Love with that imaginary hero. Many thought and still do that the son she gave a birth to in 1925 was from him. The quote from her letter to him:“I’ve loved everything, I knew how to love everything except the other, the other who was alive. The other has always bothered me; it was a wall against which I broke, I didn’t know how to live with the living. Hence my feeling that I was not a woman but a Soul.You simply have loved me … I told you: there is a Soul. You said: there is a Life.”5. To Abram (Abraham) Vishnyak (1893-1944)I told you about him and Tsvetaeva in my previous reply. She published her letters to him and one of his in “Florentine nights. Nine Letters with a Tenth Kept Back and an Eleventh Received”.Quotes from her letters to him:“What is it to forget a human being ? - It is to forget what one suffered through him …”“Such things do not hurt me any longer, you accustomed me to them, you and everyone else …”“My total forgetfulness and my absolute failure to recognize you today are but your absolute presence and my total absorption of yesterday. As much as you were — as much you are no longer. The absolute presence in reverse. Such a presence cannot but become such an absence. Everything yesterday, nothing today.”“You make me soft (humanize, feminize, animalize) like fur.”“All these last years, my life has been so different, so hard, so icy that now I can only raise my shoulders and my eyebrows: is this me ?You soften me (make me more human, more woman, more animal) as fur does.”5. To Anatoly Shteiger (1907-1944). An absolutely must read. She was 44 and he was 29. There are 30 letters of hers saved to him from 1936 and only one to her, plus some excerpts she saved in her notes and as references to them in her letters to him. He was a young Russian emigrant-poet who lived in Switzerland, I posted a couple of quotes from his poems here. When they started an extensive correspondence, Tsvetaeva lived in Paris. A personal meeting between them took place only briefly before the correspondence had started, then he wrote her a deeply-confessional 16-pages letter to which she responded and this is how it started. She fell in Love with him. In the last, the only saved letter, he reminded her that in that first long confessional letter he tried very hard to explain to her that he was homosexual. She did not understand, didn’t catch it or, rather, what I think and believe, – she did not want to understand or catch. What she saw was only this: a young, broken-hearted man from a previous relationship, who is very ill with a tuberculosis, about to have a lung surgery and who came to her for a help. So she ran to help him, fell in Love, because she felt being needed. This what Tsvetaeva was about … As I say and write about myself: “I am there where I am needed. Make me believe I am needed … and my Soul will be yours … ”. She was the same.  Quotes from her letters to him:

“I am longing for you. Never — without you. As — to be longing for a bread — means to be taken by thoughts about it. To be longing without a bread — means to be swallowed by it. Never in my life I’ve been longing – without a person. One thing — an overflow, another — emptiness. I will never be empty — by you. — I hope. (I think, I have never been empty even for a second).”

“And whether you like it or not, I already took you within, where I take everything cherished, without even contemplation, seeing it already within. You are my capture and catch, like today’s remnant of a Roman viaduct, with the dawn that breaks through and plunges in more faithfully and more eternally than the river Loing, into which it forever gazes at itself.”“But you, at certain moments, are I — to the point of strangeness”“Now I am thinking about you: thinking — you”“Your letter has gored my icy scurf, it opened up my own vibrant abyss – where you immediately and fully have engulfed yourself.”“I tell you in advance – whatever you will be, when you enter through my door, – I will be loving you anyway, because I love you already, because – the miracle has happened – and this is only about the degree of pain – the better you will be – the worse it will be – to me.”When she, finally understood the reason, why he couldn’t return her Love …. she wrote him a bitter and hurtful letter to which he responded:“Yes, you can be colder than a star if you want. I was always afraid of it.”In that last, the only saved letter, the young Shteiger with a wisdom of an old man, pointed out, in a form of a light and polite accusation, as a plain sad fact, at one of the very important characteristics of Tsvetaeva, that accompanied all to one of her relationships: all men that she ever Loved – she simply created in her exceptional unique imagination. She had to … to bring them closer to the level of the richness, vastness and the immensity of her Soul. But there were consequences: soon or later, that “image” fell off … So, Shteiger wrote to her: “You are so “powerful” and “rich”, you recreate the  people you meet in your own way, but when their real, authentic image comes out, after all, – you get astonished of the vanity of those on who that “gleam” of yours is no longer applied by you…But what does the Person might feel when that created “image” of yours is no longer applied on him by you ? After you created it, enjoyed it and then – stop seeing it in him ?” . It is so very true. I do the same … From her last letters to him:“… I loved you as who I am, which is difficult to explain … ““That was a blow to my chest (in which you resided) and, if I did not fall down — then only because no human force can knock me flat any more, because I no longer permit this to humans, because I will die — standing up”“How many times ? Don’t I know that everything ends; don’t I believe that this (what is in me for you) will end one day, will ease me that I will think out of you: will become again an empty – bleak – and roomy house: domaine ?”She dedicated a cycle of poems to him “Poems To Orphans”, the 4 epigraph lines, only he could understand: “Baby walked along the road Shivering and turning blue An old woman walked that road She took pity on the orphan”  Anatoly Shteiger will die of tuberculosis, in 1944 at the age of 37. So, what do you think ? Worth reading her letters first ? ***************************Now, prose and poetry.I can only recommend from what has been translated. If you spoke Russian, my recommendations would have been different. For example, I would have strongly suggested you to read her “Collated notes” and “Diary prose” she kept most of her life, but neither one of them has been translated. Some bits and pieces in various books, strangely translated as her “diaries” (!?!). Poetry.The problem with her poetry is the translation. She created words, which are untranslatable, therefore, in translation, you only get the meaning of what she wrote and in many cases, it is badly mistranslated, misinterpreted. Another thing, that she had an absolute pitch and considered the music her first language. You need to listen to her poetry in Russian to understand what she was saying in a poem … it is absolutely untranslatable.  Don’t read anything translated by Elaine Feinstein. There is a special place in Hell for translators like her. She will go straight there, already reserved. Here is my short review of just 3 lines of Tsvetaeva, someone quoted, you will get an idea how bad her translations are: https://finita--la--commedia.tumblr.com/post/187285356964/your-name-is-a-kiss-of-snow-a-gulp-of-icy-springThe best translations, of her poetry, by my opinion, surprisingly, available free, on the Internet, by Ilya Shabat, a huge collection:http://lib.ru/POEZIQ/CWETAEWA/sbornik_engl.txtJust pick, randomly – any. Here is the pdf book with some of her poems I would also recommend:http://www.sumizdat.org/To_you_in_10_decades.pdfProse. 

Unfortunately, I could only find one work translated into English, it is worth reading:“The Letter to Amazon” – 13 pages. You can download pdf file here, the button in the right corner, on top:https://www.researchgate.net/publication/319316122_LETTER_TO_AN_AMAZON_BY_MARINA_TSVETAEVAQuotes:“Listen to me, you do not have to respond to me, you have to just listen. This is a wound that I inflict right at your heart, at the heart of your cause, of your belief, of your body, of your heart.”“Weeping willow ! Inconsolable willow ! Willow – the body and soul of women ! Inconsolable neck of willow.”“In my youth I was quick to say to myself: I always fear letting go of the wave rising from me and carrying me to another. I always fear that I will not love anymore, that I will not learn anything anymore. But I am no longer young and I have learned to let go of almost everything – irretrievably”There is a semi-autobiographical story I would also recommend you to read, I think there is a translation: “The Tale of Sonechka”Quote:“– Marina, do you think God will forgive me for having been kissed so much ? – Do you think God counted ? – I didn’t count either.”  Well … uhhhh ….  let me know if you have more questions about her works, life, a family or about the correspondents I have listed above for each has a personal story. 

[maren-reads-books]

The Raven King by Nora Sakavic

With the Foxes having been hit with a major loss at the very beginning of the season, they have to learn how to cope with one less teammate while preparing for a perilous season. As they familiarize themselves with a less than ideal lineup they prepare themselves as best they can for their first ever game against the Edgar Allen Ravens. With pasts starting to come back to haunt the team they work their way though and try to push past it. As they work hard to succeed they grow closer than ever before and reveal things that never would have come to light if Neil wasn't on the team to stir things up and break boundaries. As they struggle and conquer together on the court and in their lives, the start to become a united front only for the events of the Christmas banquet finally force them apart. Will the team be able to survive or will they crumble under the pressure of their pasts?

--SPOILERS--

This review is a bit long so bear with me. I feel like this book is where the story finally starts to pick up and get interesting, more so later in the book but this book is definitely it. First off, i can't imagine the way the team is feeling after Seth’s death, they all have so many emotional problems (I’m looking at you Neil) that it must've been hard even if they weren't grieving. And I get it, Seth was an asshole and nobody really liked him but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't care about his death, I especially felt bad for Allison, she didn't deserve that. But I think in the long run (not to sound mean) Seth’s death helped bring the team closer together. And then in the midst of all this chaos, Andrew gets a call, the fateful call that will pretty much set up the entire book. It was great to learn more about the twins and their rivalry, but realizing that they’ve really only known each other for a couple of years was crazy, I can't imagine living most of your life not knowing someone was out there wearing your face. And yet they were both destined for crappy childhoods, like how much was fate messing with them huh? And then the decision to let Andrew be off his meds and play for an entire game comes along, that surprised me, but of course my crazy short blond son is willing to play along. And it works, but I'm sure Andrew felt horrible, but they won and that's what really matters, kind of. I know its not super important to the story but this part is important to me, they take Neil shopping. Finally! It seems crazy to me that he’s so resistant to people buying him anything, even something as simple as clothes, which is something that really needed to happen cause jorts? Really Neil? And the Andrew buys them matching phones?! So cute, also foreshadowing. Then the fated fall banquet arrives, where Neil starts to dig his grave deeper and deeper. First we find out that Dan used to be a stripper, but I’m so proud that she’s not ashamed fo what she did and isn’t going to let any stupid Raven get under her skin. And then we meet Jean, who of course goes on to list some of Neil’s other identities and therefore scare the shit out of him. I hated that Neil and subsequently Kevin found out that they knew who he was with all those people around, I can't imagine how that made him feel. And then after a little bit of antagonization from Riko, Neil snaps and gives his iconic, “You know, I get it” speech, like damn. One side of me is like ‘do you want to make things a little bit worse for yourself hunny?’ and the other side of me is like ‘yas go off on this abusive chauvinist asshole’ and then they tell Neil that really all along he wasn't running from his dad, he was running from Riko’s family and it's just like *boom* mic dropped. Again I can't imagine how truly afraid Neil was for his life at that very moment. His conversation about it with Kevin hit me hard, Neil’s been on the run for years, having someone know who he truly is must be the worst feeling ever, but he chooses to stay anyway, my boy has immense courage and probably a death wish but I'm so glad that that's what he chose. One thing I love the most about this book is the fact that Neil starts to form friendships, actual genuine bonds with real good people. It's crazy that he's never had real friends before but I’m glad that he's friends with these people, they're great in a messed up family dynamic kind of way. Learning the rest of the twins story from Nicky made me appalled, what kind of mother, let alone person could give up her kids change her mind but not have enough love or decenty in her heart to take both? Their story hurt my heart like you could not believe. And then Nicky implying that Andrew killed their mother(which he did but whatever) like damn, another mic drop. And then the topic completely changes form murder to ‘hey Nicky why are you gay?’ and Nicky’s answer is just hilariously on point for his character, the way he talks about Erik is just so adorable, I wish we got to see more of Erik in this series. But Nicky’s backstory is so sad! His parents are awful and I can't imagine what he went through before he truly started to love himself. Then their first game against the Ravens arrives. I was so nervous, I was literally sitting on the edge of my seat during this game. And even though they lost I was very proud of them, but I really just wanted to slit Riko’s throat. I hate him with all of my five foot one self. And then its Halloween and Neil (my magical boy) convinces the entire team to go out for drinks together, what an absolute miracle. But it's not all rainbows and sunshine, quite yet. Remember that call that Andrew got at the beginning of the book, well turns out the cop has come for a visit, how wonderful. But it's a very vague scene which again, is vital later in the book. But then we learn about Matt’s backstory. Like wow, lots of tragic backstories in this book amiraight? After Halloween Neil and Renee finally have in my opinion, a much needed heart to heart, or as close to it as two severely damaged people can get. And we get another backstory, wow, I think we're checking pretty much everyone off the list. Also I want to meet Kevin's girlfriend! I want to meet her now! Then another phone call that will set up the rest of this book. Nicky’s parents call to invite them over for Thanksgiving. What a mess, but Andrew, Kevin, Aaron, Nicky, and Neil all pile into the car and take a ride down to see the parents. But not before stopping by the Exy store to get Neil a new racket, which is also another crazy important detail. This book flows so nicely, even if the events that occur aren't nice, everything connects so seamlessly, it's perfect. And then we meet the parents, right off the bat I knew I would hate them and that they were only going to cause problems. Religion is okay, like Nicky says, it is an interpretation of faith, but people like Nicky's parents aren't willing to view it like that and that makes them dangerous, turns out I was right. Luring Andrew to Drake was cruel and horrifying. I hope they get sent away. The way Aaron defended his brother though, that kind of passion for someone you barely know is something that runs in the twins blood and that's the connection that will be vital to repairing their brotherhood. The way Neil tried to comfort Andrew, all that boy wants is to protect him. The description of Andrew being too high to even really process what had just happened to him, and the description of his laugh, it was enough to make me feel nauseous, it was such a descriptive and visceral scene. I don't agree with Aaron being arrested but whatever. But the fact that, after Andrew found out he was being sent away, he had enough trust in Neil to give Kevins care to him, like wow. That's such a big step in the right direction for their relationship. And I'm so gosh dang happy that Andrew is being taken off his meds, if they'd left him on them after what he went through I would have a serious problem. But Neil honey, your racket was used as a murder weapon and you want it back?! Like seriously? My boy needs some help, but he gets a new one so it's fine. Neil’s mission to fix Aaron and Andrew’s relationship? Such pure intentions for a boy with such a broken heart but it really shows how much he cares for these people, he has such a caring heart and has never deserved anything that he's gotten. The scene on page 269, yes I put the page number in there because it's important, when Neil asks the team if they are actually friends. Ugh, my heart did a little song and dance, I’m so happy that my broken boy has friends, and I’m glad that Aaron gets to keep Katelyn around, I like her, she's good for him. But the Christmas banquet arrives and doesn't bring any yuletide cheer with it. First things first, Riko admitted to being the cause of Seth's death, like wow didn't think that was going to happen but he's a cocky asshole so I really should have expected it. Second, he admits to setting up the thing with Drake and then tells Neil that he can have Andrew tortured/raped at his rehabilitation center if Neil doesn't cooperate. And so Neil sets off to Evermore for Christmas break, pretty much sealing his fate meanwhile the only one that knows is Kevin and Kevin can’t say a thing to stop him. I was literally screaming at my book by this point begging him not to go, but he's a stubborn little asshole. Okay, the fact that Riko put him in Kevin's place, was super symbolic of Riko’s insane personality. Then we find out that Kevin’s dad is Wymack? Like, uh, definitely didn't see that one coming, like never in a million years would I have expected that. I can't believe that they beat Neil to a pulp and then expected him to play? They're literally torturing this boy just to get him to play a sport, then Riko pulls out his knife and gets to work, and like Neil says Riko is “one seriously fucked up individual.” And then he’s home, honestly I think it works well that his time at Evermore wasn’t in the book, it makes it feel more real, I don't know how to describe it but it makes it feel like Neil tried to block everything out and then everything comes rushing back once he’s home. The fact that Wymack dropped everything to come and get him really goes to how how much he cares for these kids, they’re his family. Then coach offered to patch him up which was really nice of him but when Neil saw his tattoo and was literally ready to carve it of his face with a kitchen knife, you really get a peek into how much damage they truly did to him and how much he really cares for this team, that he's willing to put himself in danger just in order to stay with them. He's willing to fight his instincts to stay with his family, and that's what bravery looks like in my opinion. As I’ve said before and will say again, I love this series so much and would highly recommend it everyone.

-maren

[clarkesablake]

back at it again - 5x02 reactions

Hola! Once again, my list of reactions from yesterday’s episode. This one had me all up in my emotions. It was a combination of things: an Octavia storyline that actually seemed thought out, callbacks to the Ark and s1 in general, JAHA, KANE. 

It was a lot of what we’ve been missing the last couple seasons which got Very grounder heavy. Whereas the 100 and the Arkadians had to adjust and react to ‘grounder culture’ in seasons 1-4, now the tables are flipped, and we get the grounders getting a taste of the 100ish years Skaikru spent in space. This episode made me think A LOT, which is fantastic. It reminded me so much of what I loved from season one, where the threat of the grounders was there, but we didn’t really know much about them. The real conflict centered around the Ark. I really enjoyed returning to those themes. Anyway, let’s get to the reactions (sorry they don’t say a ton, I was all over the place the whole time tbh):

·       Miller and Octavia sparring delinquent bbs!!!!!

·       Octavia looks so unsure as she walks out in her commander gear

·       She doesn’t want this, look at her reaction to Niylah bowing

·       Rome references! Never a good sign tbh but ily Bell

·       ‘complain to your mother’ loll

·       ‘your real commanders would’ve let you burn’ oooooooooooooooo Shoot, she right tho

·       What does Osleya mean again?

·       ‘Give them back’ LOLL I’m still shook

·       Tbh they should have gotten few more people to try the door before panicking, even though they weren’t wrong

·       I wanna know how the whole bunker found out that the door wouldn’t open so quickly??, like Kane and Abby wouldn’t have told, didn’t they have guards at the door?

·       Whoever designed this bunker was an idiot

·       Also, this whole premise is dumb, like even if they reduce population, eventually resources will run out anyway, why not wait a year at least to make any extreme decisions?

·       ‘if we need an engineer again, we’ll let you know’ Jaha’s like mmmhmmm

·       ‘it’s not a decision for today’ RT KANE

·       Why does it have to be ½ rations? Why not ¾ rations? 2/3 rations?

·       JAHA IS A GOOD FATHER

·       ‘the ark sucked, but we survived it’ heck yeah. TBh the grounders are lucky they have skaikru (and Jaha) because they know somewhat how to make this work

·       Jackson and Abby’s friendship cracks me up “let’s talk about you” lmao me w/ my friends

·       This agro girl is such an idiot, why start a fight in an enclosed space like this?? She’s as bad as the grounders

·       Also, underestimating Octavia is a horrible idea

·       Ark history I love it!!, also you know it’s bad when the floating people thing starts seeming more humane

·       “they’re scared Indra, hungry” Octavia understands fear more than most, and she still really doesn’t want to kill anyone

·       “go with Nathan” I love hearing that instead of Miller. Jaha knew Nate’s dad, and probably knew Nate for his whole life, little details are everything

·       “safety’s overrated” lmao I’d be like k thanks! Bye! Niylah is brave

·       “It isn’t hell, it’s who we are” “without a true commander to unite us, we are warring clans” WHY, why, why why?? I don’t understand, are grounders just that stupid? With no one to order them around they just ‘have to’ default to killing each other? I don’t buy it and neither does Indra (and neither would Clarke)

·       Typical grounders, instead of trying to find a solution to unlock the door like Indra, Octavia, and Jaha, they just run around “finding people to take their anger out on” I can’t

·       I also love how no one is understanding Jaha’s point at all, lol ‘I should have lead with that’

·       “Can you make him look like a grounder? You know I can” I love this, she’s like that one character in other shows that always makes the disguises or costumes every episode

·       Taking off the commander gear was the best decision she ever made tbh. The commanders are Dead noah fence

·       Watching them serve all that extra food makes me physically ill, even if they’re just skaikru, they should still ration

·       I love how confident Marcus is in his decision to save Abby, he would do it a thousand times over

·       The fact that Jaha is apologizing to Octavia because of her life on the Ark and the fact that she doesn’t feel like a part of skaikru brings me joy and immense pain at the same time, my heart is breaking. “WE ARE YOUR PEOPLE” All I want is for her to embrace that

·       Death is the enemy, when your mother broke the law, she pushed us closer to death, so she made herself the enemy. SHOOT fwcvgkjrtb3rk He’s Not Wrong

·       “Now you know what it takes to lead” in this situation, it takes killing anyone who doesn’t follow the authority, Octavia in this case. And now she understands that. Which sucks, because she’s sacrificing some of her humanity and people’s lives to be that leader she needs to be, but also Jaha’s right! The Ark was messed up but it worked for so long, and there’s a reason for that, and it’s this mentality. What works on the ground doesn’t hold up in a place like the Ark or the bunker. AHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhg this is such a good scene

·       “I’d just gotten you back. The world was ending before our very eyes and I thought I could weather any storm as long as you were by my side.” THIS IS STRAIGHT UP POETRY MARCUS

·       KABBBYYYYYYY I’m in tears

·       YOU ARE WONKRU OR YOU ARE THE ENEMY OF WONKRU. CHOOSE

·       SHOOT SHOOT SHOOT SHOOT was all I was screaming in my head in this scene. It’s so smart. They literally had the choice to face her to get the chance to kill innocent skaikru people or follow her and live! It’s a simple system and it WORKS.

·       TAKE ME TO WELLS IM SOBBING WELLS JAHA MY LOVE

·       AND THEN THEY HIT ME WITH THE TRAVELER’S BLESSING ITS POETRY AND IT’S TRAGIC AND IM CRYING

·       MAY WE MEET AGAIN

·       I’m just emotional Jaha has been here since the beginning and he is part of what made the season 1 storyline so special, and this episode was just so many callbacks to those themes and characters and It hurts

·       Marie is SELLING this empress thing, it’s insane, and that transition to six years later!! DANG

·       And how they changed the set, the entire room is red now, and the people went from watching in horror to cheering the fight on, Octavia went from creating this system out of necessity to reveling in it and the power.

·       Systems like the ark and the bunker work, but they can only function for so long. Things always change, and holding on to this way of thinking will hurt them on the ground. Think how without Clarke and Bellamy’s leadership, the Arkadians might not have made it very long, because they were stuck on the rules from the Ark. The delinquents thrived because they rejected the Ark’s system. “We don’t decide who lives and dies. Not down here!”

·       I hate that that one lady lived of all the people

·       Ethan and the ‘wonkru noviates’ thing scares the crap out of me

·       Marcus is in the ring, how much you wanna bet it was for Abby??

[nebulawriter]

Holy Musical B@man for Kids, I mean--Lego Batman Movie

This movie was basically everything I wanted. Mostly. Well, a couple quibbles, but without spoilers:

1) good batman story

2) good humor

3) good characters

4) Excellent nerdy references (not even just for Batman/DC things)

Honestly, if you took out some of the lego stuff and just made it a parody animated movie this still would have worked great. 

And then, if you re-wrote a lot of it, taking out the humor to just make this a batman movie, it would probably be my favorite batman story I’ve seen in film. 

Well, more or less. 

Look, I can see the future, and I can SEE all the people who are going to shout “this is the best batman ever!” And...I can see that. But I can also see the backlash of “UGH I’m so tired of people hating on batman and saying the parody is better!” And I’m just. Not ready for the discourse(TM). 

Anyway, about the general movie. 

I’m serious about how great a Batman story this is. The idea of Bruce overcoming his fear of loss after the tragic death of his parents to form a team and family around him is just...gold. Especially with how important the Bat Family is in the comics. 

It’s also an excellent counter to the ‘loner batman’ stereotype that plays out in everything since....definitely the batman trilogy but I think before that too. Probably Frank Miller’s batman, but to be honest, I am not as familiar with comics production history to give good commentary here.

It’s ALSO good to see a Batman story thats just...not all about Batman. I’ve been saying, the only way to do another batman story is to tell the story of training Dick Grayson now. Yeah, Batman Begins was great, but guys, Batman’s origin story is one of the most famous around. Even if you’re like, not into superhero things at all, you know about a little boy billionaire who’s parents were killed when he was young. The only other heroes with nearly that level of fame are Superman’s ‘sent to earth as a baby’ story or Spiderman’s ‘bitten by a radioactive spider’ story. And you just...can’t do those kinda stories anymore. It’s boring. People know it. There’s nothing you can add to it--UNLESS you parallel it to Batman helping out another young orphan, like Dick Grayson.

(Also, I know the temptation must have been immense, so I will compliment the writers for only including one dick joke in this children’s movie) 

This story led to a wonderful emotional climax, where Bruce realizes a) trying to keep people away will not save them, and b) it actually hurts people more as Dick nearly becomes Nightwing, attempting to shed his child-like persona in an effort to become more like Batman. 

Now, this isn’t to say stories like this haven’t been done before, and I can think of one prime example: Holy Musical B@man, the starkid musical. Which has a very similar storyline, but I think the two are different enough that it works out. Also this movie has less racist jokes...thank goodness....

It’s also vaguely similar to HISHE Batman. In fact, the whole concept of the Phantom Zone felt incredibly similar to HISHE’s Villain Bar. There was even a youtube vid where Batman goes in and fights all the villains there! And Voldemort was prime in both! 

(we’re going to get to nerdy references in a sec) 

Anyway, this is to say, yeah, Batman Parodies are all out there already, and this isn’t exactly NEW in that sense, but its still fun!

As for the humor, it was full of references, and just....good. And clever. Like, I don’t know how even to describe it. It was extremely self-aware and just. funny, right off the bat (pun wasn’t even intended but I love it).

The characters were fun. Robin so easily could have been annoying. Barbara so easily could have just been ‘the girl’. You know the character. But it worked out really well, and they each had something to do and it always made sense. 

Not to mention, like, this movie could do a class on instantly making me care about people. Like. The two pilots at the beginning are like “And two best friends!” and I’m instantly dedicated to both of their survival. I wanted them to be okay. 

The nerdy references were off the CHARTS! Like, all the super D-List Batman villains? brilliant. All the awesome A-List Villains from other movies? Amazing! One quibble though: How do you have Ralph Fiennes in your movie (voice of Alfred) AND Voldemort in your movie, and you don’t friggin have Ralph Fiennes play Voldemort? Like....WHAT??? anyway. My inner fangirl was pleased. 

My two biggest complaints:

They tried to have Bruce be attracted to Barbara Gordon. And, yeah, okay in this version she’s an adult and the police commissioner and awesome, but....Maybe its just been too soon since The Killing Joke, so I am massively uncomfortable with this. They didn’t go down the romance route, though, so, overall its not terrible. 

In terms of being just a visual story, this was hard to watch. There is SO much going on at any given time, especially in the action scenes, its hard to keep track of it. Especially given that everything is ‘legos’ and so...it all kinda has a similar quality to it, if that makes sense. Everything feels in focus all the time and it hurt my eyes. But, I imagine it was fun for kids to watch, who could keep up with the pace and were more engaged by it than I was. Anyway, it was still good. 

[jinxedncharmed]

Have i ranted lately about how much I fucking love “City of brass?” I fucking love this book. I don’t know how many times I’ve reread it. I’m slowly annotating it. I have “kingdom of copper"s release date on my calendar. Why isn’t everyone talking about this book? It’s incredible and pushes all my book buttons. I can’t even express the reasons I love it in full depth. I can’t like adequately convey why I love it and how much I love it. I mean, broadly speaking, one reason I do is the setting. Unique, you don’t see a lot of western fiction setting its stories in 1800 Afghanistan, with characters both nonwhite and Muslim. I haven’t read many fantasy stories about a realm inspired by Islamic and Arabic folklore and myth. "Aladdin,” of course, Scherezade, and I’ve read some Conrad and Kipling, and HR Haggard, and probably a random short story or two, but not a lot. And of course given our political climate, why risk featuring anyone Muslim at all? So it’s great to read a fantasy featuring PoC and an amazing pantheon of mythic creatures and stories that I’m not familiar with. Second reason to love it is the incredible story. So much political intrigue! There are so many mysteries remaining at the end of the book, driving me nuts! What is the truth behind Dara’s ring, is it just his enslaving charm or is it a counter to the seal? Is Nahri actually Menizheh’s daughter, or Menizheh in disguise, or not related at all? We dont even know if she’s a shafit or a daeva. Was anything the king said to Nahri and Dara in their first meeting true? Was Menizheh his lover? Was she really a friend? Or is he just playing the game, making the soothing remarks expected by constituents who wait to hear what a politician says about a dead rival? How’d she fake her death? Or did she? Is Ali the king’s true son? Did Zaynab try to murder Nahri that first night, not just get her drunk? What’s Nasreen’s real story? Is Jamshid secretly a Nahid? Are all Daevas now descended from the Nahids, as part of a rebellion plan? This isn’t even like a tenth of the questions I have. Very engaging and entertaining story. Related to that, the writing is, in the technical sense, near flawless. The narrative technique of alternating point of view characters per chapter is nothing new, but it is utilized to great effect, allowing chakraboty to control the pacing of the book, and boy does she, keeping readers on a roller coaster of cliff-hangers and gasp-inducing betrayals. Textbook tricks of conflict-driven storytelling, such as misunderstandings, just-missed-each-others, deliberate sabotage, multiple players with unique motivations, and plain dumb luck, are employed perfectly, keeping the story realistic and playing fair with your reader, keeping them guessing with misdirection that would be the envy of any master magician. The catty politics are deliciously indulgent, better than anything on daytime soaps. The players are all so clever, and sometimes they’re devious and sometimes they’re shameless, and it is fun! The way it is written is phenomenal, the way that writing tools are used is perfect. Like, when you’re teaching writing, use “City of brass” to illustrate what those tools are, how to use them successfully, and how to tweak but not break them. Now well I will say this, that I thought some of the dialogue, particularly regarding the syntax and vocabulary of the speakers, is sometimes anachronistic. There is also a lot of information that is tough for a reader to absorb, such as unfamiliar/made-up terminology, unfamiliar character names, and a complex and unfamiliar setting. I caught and better understood a lot more of the various plot points and political thorns in my second read-thru, thereby further enriching my experience of the story. So all that world building exposition can be overwhelming and move a bit too fast in some places. Another huge reason to love this book is its morality. For me, this is a book where it’s hard to label your hero and villain. Who’s in the wrong, and who’s in the right? Was it wrong for the Nahids to murder shafit? Their covenant to Suleiman was to leave humans alone, and they were terrified to let the djinn breed with them, so does that justify killing shafit? Is Dara right when he says in his time the shafit were treated like animals, as subhuman? Does that justify his prejudice, if that was all he was ever taught? Sins of the parents passing to children and all that; bigotry learned from parents’ example? Are the Qahtanis morally justified in overthrowing the Nahids in order to protect the shafit? Or is that last disqualifier a dealbreaker, and they overthrew the Nahids for their personal benefit, not for the shafit? Does it matter whether they give the former or the latter as their reason? If they aren’t morally justified in their coup, is Dara ethically right to start a rebellion? After all, Qathani killed his family well not personally. Was Dara right to take his revenge on his human masters, after he was enslaved and heavily abused? Why or why not? I love that I can’t parse out in a logical, moral process with empirical evidence, which party has a legit grievance and which’s being a drama queen. I really applaud chakraboty for pulling off this immensely difficult technique in creating a true morally ambiguous story. She does it better than Rowling, as in HP good and evil were the usual cliched stereotypes and people were easily sorted into the correct side, good or evil. The gray morality is a massive plus for the book. And finally, the characters. I have strong feelings for these characters, and that's what writers want, for readers to react in some way any way to their character. I like Nahri, she’s clever and jaded and trying to survive political machinations, and I want to know who wants her and why, who her family is, why she was abandoned. I want her to come out the winner in this trilogy, whatever that means. And I ship Nahri/Dara, it is the OTP, as is Muntadhir/Jamshid, Jamshid on top, shut up its my headcanon. I hate Ali, and it’s fun but also a little shameful to do so. He is the oldest 18-year-old ever. Hes a sanctimonious prick, a holier than thou cultist. But boy does he have a rough time, everything goes wrong for him despite his nauseating piety and seriousness, and at first it’s funny to see him get suckered but then the stakes go up and you sympathize with him. I’m interested in his emotional development, what the psychological arc is going to be for him. I mean he needs to get fucking laid so bad. Also he’s like half crocodile now so we’ll see where that goes. And of course Dara. I fucking love Dara so fucking much. He’s just so extra all the time. Raising those shedu, breaking that glass table with his bare fist, calling the king a sandfly to his face, tipping over his teacup and pouting, the way he killed the rukh, the way he reacts to nightmares. Dry and witty, and more clever than you think, and cunning. Unbelievably fucked in the head. Fragile, outrageously delicate, like two triggers away from a complete and murderous breakdown. A serious PTSD sufferer with mental trauma from an actually horrible life, even before his 14 centuries of slavery. That boy has suffered, and it’s made him hard and focused and isolated, even while his high intelligence keeps him spewing shrewd insults and nailing his power moves, and his emotional self remains a soft gooey ball buried deep inside. Honorable, racist, judgmental, a man who follows his moral code with integrity, arrogant, powerful, a hero, a war criminal, a legend, a demon, a scourge, a victim, a pawn, a master of his own destiny, clever, rude, obstinate, dead?, genuinely kind, noble, grieving, dignified, mysterious, gentlemanly, depressed, and dangerously fucked up. Oh I love it, ahhh, the angst tastes so good, i'm creasing my eyes in pleasure lol and the hurt/comfort aspect, ooooooh it just hits every nerve ending in a perfect ping. It won’t be a happy ending for him, a tragic hero like that always dies, ask Shakespeare, but I really wish he would make it, not just live but have a fucking happy ending, he gets the girl, he gets the throne, he gets a therapist and a bottle of Cymbalta and a recommendation to smoke one joint twice a day. Please he deserves a happy ending, what with all his suffering. The way Sirius and Remus both deserved happy-ever-afters. The way Gen does too, in the “Queen’s Thief” series, and which he also probably won’t get. But oh man I want Dara to be happy, whatever that means. Anyway, this book rocks, dying for the next one, everyone should read this book, it is fucking fun.