#its like. eds are only bad when the person its affecting is already skinny. because theyre ‘’perfect’’ already

[cherrysnax]

i really hate that my parents made my childhood about losing weight lol

[rainpudding]

note; m will be in my next post, someone else already requested it >3

tw; depression,suicide and ed mentioned,alcohol dying and etc..

KAEYA | ANGST ALPHABET

catcall die kidnapped time

Kidnapped (you’re kidnapped)

Most people would say Kaeya would develop a strong alcohol addiction to forget that his lover went missing however I have to strongly disagree.

When Kaeya gets home and he can't find you anywhere he won't think much of it. Maybe you went to visit your family and forgot to tell him, or you're having a sleepover with a friend. On the outside, he seems calm as for the next three days he goes to work acting as nothing happened. But on the inside he is panicking, he gets his work done as soon as possible as he gets home just to sit down on a chair staring at the door. He Is waiting for the door to open and you to appear. He is sitting there for hours and hours.

After a week of you not appearing he blames himself for not reaching for help sooner as it may be too late to found you. He calls knight of favounius and citizens of mondstat goes in groups looking for you. Traveler makes missing posters trying to help at least a little bit.

Kaeya wants to forget you but he slowly loses interest in alcohol, it feels like it lost Its taste.

His public calm image is slowly breaking as his mind is filled with dark imaginations. He slowly forgets to eat meals or to keep himself hydrated.

Apart from Childe who gets obsessive filled with hope, Kaeya gets depressive knowing that there is no possibility you can be okay.

Jean first notices Kaeya's depression when she sees him standing in the middle of the hall. His eyepatch is missing his messy hair covering his eye. He wears only his white shirt as he is visibly confused.

The dehydration and sleep deprivation have a bad impact on him. Jean knows something is wrong and sends him home in order to take a break. Which does not help since Kaeya should have human interaction and get meds not be home.

Diluc gets worried as he makes meals for him carrying them to his house. The house is a mess as Kaeya is unable to clean which results in Dikuc quickly putting Kaeya's mess into the bin trying to clean up at least a little bit.

Kaeya, on the other hand, doesn't want to go to sleep but once he is asleep he doesn't want to wake up. He can't get out of his bed. Becoming more disoriented and slowly forgetting why he is sad in the first place.

He doesn't remember your face anymore, nor your name. He doesn't remember you at all.

And one morning when Diluc opens door to Kaeya's room holding breakfast to his surprise he finds Kaeya in his bed. Melatonin pills everywhere as he slowly realizes Kaeya overdosed himself.

But let's imagine you were found and you came home just before Kaeya got depressed.

You open the door with a crack quickly closing it as you finally feel safe. You were missing for almost three months yet since day one you were dreaming of the moment when you will be able to hug Kaeya again.

You look around finding your shared house slightly messy. The bin is filled with old food. The boxes on tables are also filled with untouched food. You wander around softly smiling at the pictures and decorations.

You pinch yourself just to be sure this is not one of the fantasies you always dreamed about. Opening one of the doors you walk in just to see Kaeya peacefully sleeping in pillows and blankets. His hair messy and his eyepatch still on.

You don't want to wake him up yet you're too excited to wait. You run to him as you hug him tightly. Sweet tears rolling down your cheeks as you sniffle Kaeya's scent.

Kaeya tries to push you away murmuring from his sleep before sleepily opening his eyes. They are dark as the ocean as the sparkles died down. His smirk wasn't decorating his face anymore. Instead, he sighed rubbing his eyes.

You would stroke his cheeks as you hold his chin softly. You're saying reassuring words while smiling with glossy eyes. He finally realizes that you're real. Grabbing your hands to squeeze them and peppering your face with many kisses.

And after a whole hour of hugging each other and you telling him about your kidnapper he decides to go to knights of favounius so they can throw your kidnapper into jail.

However, as he stands up you suddenly stop him as you look at his body. You can see how skinny he got, how his bones are seen, and how his skin is pale. Not to mention the blue hair on the pillow signalizing hair loss.

And you realize that he barely ate. That's why there were boxes with untouched food.

"Later, I'm hungry can we go for lunch first?" You smile brushing your thumb against Kaeya's hand as he nods.

- it would take some time for Kaeya to start taking care of himself again. But when you're with him he is willing to try.

- He will take a break to spend time with you as you cook together and clean the house later even going for a walk.

- eventually, give him few months and he will be healthy again.

Catcall (you’re catcalled and he’s with you)

Same as Diluc, Kaeya is well known and has a reputation. There is no way someone would catcall you on purpose. Yet let's imagine some drunk group catcalling you in front of your boyfriend.

This would go based on how bold they are.

1; if they will call you baby or any pet name maybe hinting something romantic. Kaeya will just chuckle as he is listening to them. He wouldn't get angry as he thinks it's funny how they try to flirt with you. "You should watch what you say, honorary citizens," he smiles as he is supporting his chin.

2; they would get more inappropriate or even try to touch you. This would make Kaeya slightly alerted. When they say something inappropriate he just slowly moves you next to you or into his lap. Or he has a hand around your waist. They will notice him and leave you alone. Yet if they continue even touching you he would be pissed. He doesn't want to make a scene yet he has to make a move. He stood up taking his sword pointing it at the drunk person's chest. He is glaring at that person as the person shivers apologizing. Kaeya's gaze is terrifying. But as soon as the person apologizes he hides his sword sitting next to you again.

The person will probably never come to the tavern again.

Time (you’re ill and only have a few months to live)

Kaeya started noticing that the last few days you didn't felt very well. And the symptoms you were experiencing were quite unique. Pale skin and black bags under the eyes because of insomnia. Hairloss and muscle pain. You not being hungry and constant vomiting. Scars and bruises randomly appearing on your skin.

His eyebrows were scrunched as he had a sad expression on his face. Yet every time you greeted him he quickly smiled and giggled pulling you into a hug and giving you lots of affection. You knew something wasn't right with you too, but you tough maybe it was an allergy or just some mental illness that could go away with few herbs.

Eventually, after the symptoms continuing Kaeya decided to visit Albedo. This resulted in you spending the whole weekend at Albedo's place. He took your blood and saliva, checking your bones and trying to massage the muscles. Taking detailed notes very carefully.

And when the tests were done and you got to know you're slowly dying as your organs are slowly collapsing, you couldn't do anything but blankly stare onto the wall. You felt hopeless. You knew you had few days to live before dying a painful death yet you weren't ready. All your dreams and goals were left in the dust.

Kaeya on the other hand couldn't believe it. He was following Albedo around asking him if It's true and how can he help you. He pinched himself several times, trying to get out of this nightmare. Kaeya grew desperate as he begged Albedo on his knees to make medication. Albedo would of course love to help but he didn't know how so he would dismiss Kaeya over and over.

Kaeya's wasn't mentally well. He would be obsessed with finding some medication. Contacting Baizhu from Lyuie. Spending all his money on different doctors and different people. He didn't even realize that at this time he should pay attention to you and go on dates with you. Instead, he was away in different nations looking for herbs and scientists.

Die (their reaction when you die/your reaction when they die)

And once Kaeya finally arrives home full of despair as he got few herbs but no medication he slowly walks around the room. But before he can hug you and reassure you and spend time with you he finds you on the floor. You were just taking few painkillers writing a diary entry as you collapsed eventually your organs giving in.

He would sit down in panic his eyes glossy as his breathing is slow. "Breathe, common please breathe, to the archons. Lord barbatos y/n breathe," he repeats himself over and over as tears roll down his cheeks. His hands shaking as he cheks your heartbeat.

Your body so cold and your eyes blank. Without a pinch of life. And that's when he breaks down.

Completely sobbing at your dead body. Brushing his hands over your skin as he peppers your face with kisses. "I'm sorry I didn't try harder, I'm useless, I'm a burden. I can't do anything right," he kisses you. But nothing.

You didn't wake up.

He kisses you again expecting you to wake up. In movies, they always wake up.

But this is not a movie.

This is a painful reality.

[4r0rua]

Stop shaming fat people for wanting to lose weight

TW: talking about weight and mentions of eating disorders

this is basically a rant essay, i am open to having discussions as this is simply my opinion!! and yes i am very aware that alot of my points are “ifs” and hypotheticals !

Disclaimers: i am speaking as someone who used to weigh 210LBS. i am also speaking from personal experience, i do know others who share the same experiences. This is about fat people, i am in no way saying to encourage your underweight friends to loose weight.

We need to stop shaming people for simply wanting to loose weight. just because a fat person wants to loose weight and is pursuing it doesn't make them fatphobic. big is beautiful, but as someone who is big, I'm gonna tell you right now comments like “noooo ur so pretty you don't need to loose weight” in most cases do more harm then good, also those comments are just straight up annoying. 

Starting with how those comments can be harmful, being fat sucks, society pushes the idea that skinny = beautiful and fat = ugly so its very hard to be comfortable in your own body when it feels that everyone only likes skinny people. There is also the physical aspects that suck, such as health risks, medical neglect, and in other cases lack of mobility. there is also more minor inconveniences like excessive sweating and skin chaffing which affect your everyday life (they also make self expression so much more difficult). Some fat people simply don't deal with these issues or have their ways of dealing with them with ease, but others do deal with these issues, these issues suck. By making comments discouraging weight loss to a fat person who deals with the issues stated above you may be making them feel ashamed for even considering loosing weight which leads them to continue suffering. another possible effect is the fat person may start shutting people out, weight loss is difficult and takes a lot of encouragement from ones self, but the people around them can really make a difference. if everyone in your life was discouraging you it would be very difficult to stay encouraged. from personal experience blocking people out led me down the path of developing EDs.

moving onto why these comments are annoying to me, everyone preaches how “what other people doesnt matter” and “only what you think about you matters!” and i whole heartedly agree ! why is it that when a fat person wants to loose weight people feel the need to tell them not too beacsue theyre already beautiful. yes, reassurance and compliments are great, but if someone is talking about seriously starting to go to the gym or start a diet, those comments are just discouraging and unnecicary. seconf reason i find them annoying, not everyone is loosing weight for beauty related purposes, some people have health issues relating to obesity and just want to be healthy, or even just want to be more athletic.

to conclude this basically essay, those comments are just unnecisary, unless your friend is saying a hurtful comment about their appearance directly saying its because of their weight, show them encouragment. just try and show everyone encouragment and reassurance (unless theyre doing something bad or harmful obvi).

[sockori]

oh god ryu’s rambling about ninjas again- quick, batten down the hatches

 (Episode 1 Season 1: Sasori’s Transformation Interpretations + Brief Reason Why It’s Canonically Written This Way)

‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵  a popular ‘headcanon’, or interpretation really, for Sasori I’ve seen pop up a couple of times is: his entire body is quite literally a corpse and not simply just his core. As we know, it’s essentially already been canonically confirmed that this isn’t the deal- but, we all love to disrespect canon rules completely, whether we admit it or not, so let’s roll with it: say we don’t know what Sasori is yet, other then that he isn’t necessarily human, so some propose he’s a human corpse, or another organic material. It doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, at least to me, so I tend to disagree with this whole idea. But I can see both sides of the situation on why people implement this overall change or interpretation. 

Here’s one idea. I would like to believe that Sasori is not entirely impatient. Rather, he values his patience in relation to others much differently to how he views patience in means to his collection/craftsmanship. For example, spending little time on a co-worker, whether it be feelings, personality and wants, yet very much willing to spend large amounts of time with his puppets. And a thought that comes to mind is, well, that’s because of many factors (ex. Sasori hates the trivial matters of humanity, instead retreating to puppets who won’t argue with him, which is true), and make the point that they’re artworks not necessarily co-workers, which is also true, but I think this can also illustrate where Sasori’s channeling his overall energy to in the big picture- that being he’s focusing much more his work and himself. So where in the world am I dragging this whole almost off-topic mess to? And, right here, is my other hand on the matter.

Embalming (looking at the modern example of the Russian scientists who work(ed) on both the corpses of Vladimir Lenin and various North Korean leaders) is a tedious process that is, overall, time consuming. One body alone requires a whole slew of careful monitoring, regular re-embalming, and scheduled cleaning, which can go from many hours, to multiple days at a time. Realizing just how much work is inserted into fighting the grim reaper that is decomposition, one can imagine that Sasori has quite a lot of work on his hands already. If he constantly has to dedicate his focus to the preservation of multiple puppets at once on a regular basis, how would he have any time for his own body?

And, in an counterargument, the believer of the headcanon probably has this to say: what if his suspected ‘kinjutsu’ surrounding the creation of human puppets pretty much eliminates this whole process to begin with? such as, the chakra channeled into this technique possibly making the conversation of organic material a self-sustaining process- thus, no need to keep up with the whole collection (at least not incessantly) and, in turn, have more time to focus on their functionality as puppets. If that is the reason one would want to propose to fill the void of ‘famously ambiguous human puppetry’, then Sasori’s body can, indeed, perhaps be a preserved version of himself, and provide a reason as to how he can take care of his work.

However, there’s a whole side of the coin we haven’t flipped yet- and that’s the subjective purpose. The reason behind Sasori’s wanted transformation to mechanics- philosophically and psychologically. Why go through all the trouble with such a complex, complicated metamorphosis if one wants a quick, easy escape from weakness? Or, in much simpler terms, why even turn yourself into a puppet(-like form) to start? Based on all the inner tribulations with see with gross puppet man, here’s the potential/general reasons that we know (not all of them, but the most important).

For the sake of “Eternal Beauty”, or an artistic reason: that being to exist long into the future while still pertaining an ‘attractive’ physical form.

To bypass the process of decomposition, or to gain the ability to do the opposite (synthesize- be able to be re-assembled after deconstruction).

Potentially eliminate physical human processes altogether, such as eating, drinking, sleeping/resting, among other steps.

Eliminate weaknesses in combat, such as fatigue/pain, blood loss, being mortally wounded, or wounded altogether (at least, when you disregard getting stabbed in the core)- in relation to being rid of physical human processes.

To destroy emotional connections, such as ties to people or memories (big clue: eliminating the ability to literally grieve).

To hinder the control that emotions and feelings have over the mind; to tear down impulses; to level the physical sense of feeling.

The list, at a glance, seems to portray: Sasori has transformed to separate himself from the concept of humanity or a “mortal lifespan”- to create distance between him and the fragility and ‘weaknesses’ of organic life by, in a rebellious way, converting to an inorganic form.

It’s obvious that the puppeteer has had bad experiences with being a human being- anguish from death, lack of appreciation/affection, lack of encouraging stimuli, unsatisfactory higher authority, and mental disturbance due to all these factors. It would make sense for Sasori, in response, to generate quite a lot of distrust, if not all out hatred, for the concept of a human body, and to go against its principles (and to take it out on others, but the complications of that could be another post entirely). Looking at Sasori’s canon descriptions of himself, he very much emphasizes that his inorganic form and his organic part (the core) are two separate entities (”   My heart… is just like this body…“ or his most famous “I am an unfinished puppet, whose lifeless frame still contains a beating heart at its core. I am neither dead, nor am I alive.“). I mean, seriously, in one of these situations, he looks down upon Sakura and Chiyo because they’re being human, describing helping each other as pointless, speaking of his inability to feel, such as the possibility of his grandmother’s death, as a higher-ranking trait in comparison. The divide is right there.

So, if THAT’S the case- why persist to be a preserved human life form and go against that goal entirely? If one believes Sasori thinks puppets are superior to human beings, and/or himself being superior to his puppets, wouldn’t it make more sense for him to push past merely being a hollowed out dead body, and further pursue being an actual puppet?- Not only for the emotional reasons, like the distance, but to emphasize his dominance over humanity itself by simply not being apart of it? Wouldn’t him being an inorganic form better portray his ability to manipulate mortality (being different from his human puppets)? Wasn’t all the effort he put into, canonically, for the attempt to push himself away from mortality as much as possible?

And THAT’S why I disagree with this concept.

So In conclusion, I think our puppet man staying a preserved corpse could work physically and scientifically, but not subjectively. The possibility is there, certainly, with the right factors, but the overall purpose of it is unreasonable, particularly to the definition of his role as an antagonist. With all Sasori’s personal opinions about preservation, eternity, puppetry, humanity, etc. I think him wanting to stay human would be pretty ‘ooc’ of him.

What I’m trying to say is, Sasori in canon right now- turning his body into an incomplete puppet, containing the ‘beating heart’ at its core- is incredibly crucial to his overall character. Very much symbolically. Again, keep in mind, Sasori does have organic life residing within him still- that already portrays the hypocrisy (or at least some form of oxymoron) of his beliefs and his actions. It does a phenomenal job of that alone, and should stay that way. ‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵ ok ryu are you done yet

I just wrote this entire “rant but an analysis but an argument but also a rant analysis post” for no reason at all other then impulse and I hope and pray that an explanation about some skinny mannequin guy does not lead to any potential discourse within the much s̶u̶r̶p̶e̶r̶i̶o̶r̶  sophisticated sasori stan community cause i know some folks in the naruto world really can’t handle even the slightest disagreement

oh and there’s probably a lot of weird phrasing in this because i typed it all without thinking, so if there’s any inconsistencies i am sorry

 yes I’m aware this is a Wendy’s drive thru