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#jesus fucking christ what do i even do
kuiinncedes · 1 year
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no fucking way bro
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chonideno · 1 year
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literally where can the zelda franchise go after totk. this is it. we've reached it. the pinnacle of video game entertainment. the whole dev team should just pack their stuff and enjoy a long and comfortable retirement. whoever decides their team has to follow-up on that with the next zelda game should answer for their crimes at the hague. what the fuck. I haven't even beat the game yet but what the fuck.
and how are AAA video game devs everywhere not losing their minds. how the hell did nintendo do any of that? and on that console?? you mean to tell me I can stack 15 differently shaped objects on top of each other and they don't vibrate violently into the skybox?? you mean to tell me the physics engine gladly accepts whatever I throw at it and holds it all together without dropping a frame while running on a machine that was outclassed two generations ago??? this is not witchcraft it's a grandiose demonstration of mastery over every aspect of game development that casts an immense shadow over every other AAA studio. fuck. fuck!!!!
everything about this game is crazy to me. the visuals are crazy. the soudtrack is crazy. the complexity of all systems and how they interact is crazy. the sheer amount of non-repeating content, NPCs, quests, dialogue, puzzles, environment variety - all crazy to me. every time I boot up this game I am humbled by the monumental effort and obvious love that went into every facet of the resulting experience. no cut corners anywhere. mirror-perfect chrome polish.
it's so rare we get something like that, in any field. I'd understand if nintendo never made a zelda game ever again because how do you follow that. god I hope everyone who worked on this game got the fattest check and the sloppiest head. I'm so happy I get to live in shigeru miyamoto's world
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miku.. worldwide....? of all the ways I'm joining this trend is...... this?
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I think they shot her after?
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firehose118 · 3 months
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“We’re just helping each other out on a long shift. It’s not gay,” Sal says into the air of the empty station bathroom as he wraps a hand around Tommy’s dick, and then in the same breath, “No one can ever know.”
Tommy nods, too far gone in the fantasy-come-to-life of what’s happening to dwell on the irony there. He’ll pick that apart later. For now, he has what he’s craved for so long within his grasp, he just has to reach out and take it.
He gets his hand on Sal’s dick in return and revels in the way it twitches under his touch. Tommy wants to moan with how good it feels to touch another man like this, to be touched by one. But he has to pretend this is friend stuff—normal straight guy shit, not the stuff of waking wet dreams—or else it will be taken away from him.
{finish on ao3 or continue below}
Tommy tries to match Sal’s pace: hard, fast, efficient. He thumbs through the liquid gathering at the head, twists his hand on the upstroke, but doesn’t let himself linger—even as his body is screaming for him to slow down and savor it. This might be his first and last chance to have this.
The way Sal is looking right at him is unexpected. He’d thought Sal would look away, pick a tile on the wall and stare at it, pretend this isn’t happening, but no: Sal is in it, studying Tommy’s face in that passive slack-jawed way of his. Tommy keeps his expression carefully neutral but he’s worried even that will give him away.
Sal’s mouth drops open on a silent moan when Tommy’s thumb drags along the vein on the underside just right, so Tommy does it again harder. He wants Sal to like this. He wants Sal to want to do this again.
Tommy is losing focus quickly. Sal isn’t working as hard to impress him, isn’t pulling out different moves to see what he likes, but his hand is big and warm and calloused and masculine around Tommy’s dick and it really doesn’t need to do anything else to have him panting and leaking.
He’s thought about this so many times and the reality of it is even better than he could have imagined. Every bit of energy he’s not using to give Sal the handjob of his life he’s putting into not whining and humping Sal’s hand like a dog.
He takes half a step forward before he can stop himself; needing to be closer. Sal huffs but he doesn’t say anything, doesn’t step back.
They’re so close to each other now that Tommy could wrap his hand around both of their dicks and jerk them off like that. He knows it would feel good, wants it more than anything in this moment, but it would be a definitive step over the ‘not gay’ line into territory he’s not sure Sal will follow him willingly. It’s this or nothing, so Tommy chooses this.
“You close?” Tommy asks. He is. He can already feel it rising in his stomach, his balls, licking along his spine. He wants Sal to come first, to hide whatever his own orgasm is going to look like in the mists of Sal’s pleasure.
Sal nods. His face is inches away from Tommy’s and he looks like he wants to say something, but he doesn’t.
When it happens, Tommy feels it. He doesn’t know why he didn’t expect to—he always feels the pulsing of his own dick as he comes—but to feel another man’s dick twitch and spasm as it shoots warm into his hand has Tommy biting back a moan so quickly he chokes on it.
Sal comes with a low groan and Tommy is helpless to follow. For as long as he’s wanted this—wanted Sal—he thinks he could’ve come from that sound alone, but the way Sal’s big hand tightens on the next few strokes is the last thing he needs to send him hurtling over the edge.
Tommy’s forehead drops to Sal’s shoulder without permission and he keens high in his throat as the pleasure rips through him. It’s easily the best orgasm he’s had in years and he’s instantly terrified of what that means.
He shoves it down. Later. He’ll think about that later.
Tommy pants, coming back to himself, and he gives himself two more seconds of physical contact with Sal before he pulls back completely.
They both lean against the hard tile wall of the bathroom and catch their breaths.
“Good?” Tommy asks, giving a joking half-smile. He knows the answer but it seems like a safe enough way to start talking again.
“Jesus, kid,” Sal laughs. “Yeah. It was good. Where the fuck’d you learn how to do that?”
He grabs some paper towels to wipe his hand off, then gives them to Tommy to do the same.
“Lonely childhood,” Tommy says. It’s true but it’s not the answer. “Dad had a lot of porn mags he’d leave around. I spent a lot of time jerking off. Figured yours doesn’t work too differently from mine.”
That look is back in Sal’s eyes like he wants to say something, but he stays quiet again. He just shakes his head and laughs.
Sal walks towards the door but stops before he opens it. “Give it a few,” he says. He doesn’t look back at Tommy but he has a small smile on his lips still. Tommy takes that as a win.
Sal leaves and Tommy is left alone with the enormity of what just happened. It was good. It was hot. Sal clearly doesn’t hate him, isn’t disgusted by him. He seemed almost… intrigued.
Tommy will sort out the shame and elation he feels swirling inside of himself like oil and water later.
For now, he washes his hands, splashes some water on his face, and gets back to work.
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yuridovewing · 3 months
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what i will always, alwaysss hate about the crowfeather discourse is how it got several people, even some people who i thought would know better than to spread such harmful rhetoric, to get up on their soapbox and say with their whole chest "child neglect is not abusive, breezepelt should get the fuck over it"
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every time i rewatch the miracle aligner music video i am just flabbergasted. FLABBERGASTED. like. they really chose to make it like THAT. and by 'like THAT' i am specifically referring to:
1) “an attempt to extract the truth... approximately" *cue rosepetals and intense eye contact*
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2) THIS being the opening shot of the two of them
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3) miles legitimately spending the first minute of the entire video blatantly checking alex out
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4) literal rainbow lighting around them
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5) endless hand holding and twirling
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6) that moment where miles's hand reaches ever so reflexively for alex's neck
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7) the fucking closing scene?????????
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puppyeared · 3 months
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started stardew valley for the first time. born to remember villager likes and dislikes forced to immediately forget it the moment i take my eyes off thw wiki
#HELP. HEEEELPP <- THE FORGETTER#i have 18 different tabs open and im pretty sure half of them are duplicates. i have not made anything past 5000G i am so cooked#rn im at summer 11 ish?? i cant remember dates in real life either jesus christ GRIPPING THE COMMUNITY CALENDAR WITH MY BARE HANDS#my ass really went into this like “ill just take it easy and go into it blind so i get the newborn baby deer experience" completely ignoran#to the fact that i get anxious disappointing ppl and not having any background knowledge going into smth new. like a FOOL#also the walking speed is just slow enough to make me space out and forget where i was going and what i needed to do head in my hands#ive had to backtrack all over pelican town so many different times im in fucking adhd hell. resource management hell#im saying this like i hate it but its actually pretty fun and engaging when im not gripping my head trying to remember what i was doing#i got linus' 2 heart event and it made me whimper a little. LINUSSS LINUS I LIKE HIM. AND WILLY AND MARNIE THEYRE SO NICEYS#marnie kinda like.. reminds me of my friends mom even her face is pretty similar. shes sweet i like her. also willy calls me lad hes cool#i think im just gonna start a new save and NOT rely on the fucking mixed seed forages bc my ass was too stubborn to buy seeds#i just got sebastians 2 heart event too ughhh ive never had to work so hard for an emo boys approval. but it was satisfying#corn will fix me. its a replenishable summer-fall crop corn has to fucking fix me PLEASE#i also. made a stardew valley farmer. the one im playing as. their name is cosmo they have a backstory and everything im making#him a ref. his backstory is so fucking funny just wait#yapping#diary#puppy plays sdv
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candyskiez · 8 days
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Do you ever think about Minoris reaction to being freed from the possession because I do a lot. Like. Imagine you were used as a puppet to torment this incredibly kind and patient boy, who didn't do anything to you except be too odd and off-putting. Imagine you said so many horrible things to him and made school unbearable. Imagine you tormented him until he finally snapped and then he saves your life. After you made his life a living hell, he just...saves you anyway. And he looks at you with big, disappointed eyes and asks you if you actually treat people like that. If you would actually make someone's life a living hell or if that was just Mogami rewriting your personality to suit his needs. And you could lie. You want to lie. But you don't. You are like that. You have done it, multiple times, too many times. You've berated and harassed people who've done nothing but been too weird, too annoying, just existed wrong around you. And you have no excuse. They didn't do anything wrong. He didn't do anything wrong. And what are you supposed to say? "You didn't deserve it" what does that even do? What would make what you did hurt less? What would make up for all the horrible things you told him? What can you possibly say to make up for it? Would you even have said sorry if he HADNT saved you? Do you even know?
And then he just tells you to change. You both know sorry isn't enough. Sorry will never be enough. There is nothing you can do to take it back. You just have to be better. And you have no idea where to start. You have no idea what being a good person even means. And you have to live with knowing somewhere out there there's a complete stranger who will always remember how you treated him, and who decided you deserved to live anyways. And you have no idea why.
So anyways how's your day going.
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i dont think striker and alastor are characters who are "precious senpais who did nothing wrong" i just don't think they're as reprehensible as valentino or stella. their actions aren't excusable, no, but they aren't near that level of abhorrent.
#helluva boss#hazbin hotel#satu's unpopular opinions#alastor hazbin hotel#helluva boss striker#comparing an asexual character to a rapist is one bad take but comparing a minority character to a racist abusive rich woman?#I get all four of these characters have unbearable apologists but Jesus fucking christ some of you are actually INSANE with your takes#on striker and alastor specifically like do you not ever realize how YIKES it is to compare the few ace characters to the SEX TRAFFICKER#OR SOMEONE WHOS IMPLIED TO HAVE LOST EVERYTHING TO ROYALTY ... COMPARING HIM TO THE ABUSIVE RACIST ROYAL LADY#WHO HE DOESN’T EVEN LIKE WORKING FOR???#She’s abused her husband in front of her child and she mocks the fact he dissociated during sex yet that's comparable to someone who#at his very worst he has been a hit man with sadistic tendencies but even then it's never been on the levels of sadistic like crimson#IM NOT EXCUSING STRIKER OR ALASTORS ACTIONS BUT CHRIST!!! CHRIST ALMIGHTLY YOU GUYS ARE SOMETIMES UNBELIEVABLE#“Alastor is completely evil” is possibly the dumbest fucking thing bc if u know any basic lore you know he at least gives a shit#About Niffty. About Rosie and Mimzy. He loved his mother. His father was an abusive piece of shit#Not excusing mass murder nor the cannibalism but its likely to note he probably only became cannibal in death bc already being mixed race -#- AND A SERIAL KILLER IN THE 30S? IN LOUISIANA??? HE WOULDN'T HAVE EVEN LIVED TO 40 IF HE WAS ALSO A CANNIBAL FJFJFJ#again I'm not excusing how he treated Husk in episode 6 or how he kills people bc obviously there's no context for the latter#And the former is ... EUGH#but also I saw someone say he'd be raping Husk if he wasn't asexual and to that I say fuck you#I /will/ say that he isn't gonna redeem! I don't want him to redeem lol! him being nasty is what makes him interesting#mostly morally black yet there's some grey in there like he has layers... how did he get there...#I just don't think he's Valentino’s level of bad#Striker I'm gonna be lenient on this time because some of you are actually vile comparing him to Stella or even Valentino#Actually stop comparing any character to Valentino that isn't one of the Vees bc holy shit that's so disgusting to read as an SA survivor
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zhongrin · 5 months
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dick owners who are bodily able and living in an enviromentally capable conditions to flush toilets in a shared bathroom but don't,
fuck you 🖕🏻
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quillxpy · 4 months
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YEAAAH WH69P DE D69. S9 ANYWAY, I DREW THE MER VERS 9F MYSELF 6ECAUSE I’M AN AUTISTIC LITTLE FREAK WITH T69 MUCH TIME 9N MY HANDS. F9CUS 9N THE SEC9ND 9NE. FUCHSIA BL69D. AIN’T THAT THE DARNEST THING. 6ASHING MY HEAD INT9 THE FUCKING FL69R!!
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byfulcrums · 5 months
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i cannot stop thinking about anissa and marky though [COMIC SPOILERS]
how did he react when he learned what his mother did? just like mark, he lived a lie. he thought his mother was kind and nice — the only thing that is true is that she loved him, but now, he has no idea if he should believe it
and. you've grown up being conditioned to believe that violence is peace, and that kindness is a lie and a weakness. you hurt people. by hurting a person, by destroying him irreparably, you found the boy you love most: your son. and you don't regret it. you hope one day, once he sees him, he'll get it. but you still don't regret it. you can't say you're sorry
marky will grow up without his biological father, because when mark hugs him he can only remember his mother and what she did to him. your father can't love you the way your mom did. you can't love your mother the way your father loved his
the worst part is, that it she hadn't done it, you wouldn't have existed. you wouldn't be here. your father will grow to love you. you will grow to accept each other. but you tend to wonder — if he never sees you as anything else other than your mother's son, then who will you have when everyone else you know dies?
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snzluv3r · 2 months
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oh my goddddddddd my brain fog is so bad i fell asleep with the stove on for like. at least four hours at LEAST and only just realized because i saw the empty pot sitting there and the stove on and realized i had put water on to boil HOURS ago yeah there is no fucking water in that pot anymore it is black on the bottom i’m so so so lucky i didn’t wake up to the house in flames jesus christ brain fog is so scary
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todayisafridaynight · 9 months
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reasons number A Million why not every rgg character needs to be +6ft he looks so fuckin stretched out. actually got put in the willy wonka taffy puller
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superbattrash · 3 months
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Tell me your caseworker doesn’t care about you without telling me your caseworker doesn’t care about you, I’ll go first
She tells me, an autistic person with an anxiety disorder and severe depression (both officially diagnosed and in my file) that my workplace has issues with how I do my work / with me. When I - understandably - panic and ask what she means, because that’s not the impression I’ve gotten, she tells me I shouldn’t think about that until our meeting. But she still tells me :) before we’ve even set a date for said meeting :)
She then tells me she will call me Thursday. Maybe Friday. So for both of those days I have rushed home only to sit on my ass, waiting for her to call. Because I’m so anxious about missing it that I can’t make myself do anything :) haha
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firelise · 5 months
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black sails is revolutionary because it begs to ask the question what if weird internalized homophobia externalized as brutal heightened violence but make it lesbian? what if we add a lil attack dog beside stoic goddess trope to that lesbian? And wrap it up in some of the best most poetic writing you've ever heard
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