#jin is a sex worker

[daegudrama]

Daegudrama’s Spicy Festa Special D-6

Title: Moon Over Flower

Pairing: Reader/Kim Seokjin

Summary: Reader finally decides to lose her virginity and hires someone from the internet. Said person, unbeknownst to her, happens to be her favorite regular at the coffee shop she works at and her favorite spicy content creator.

Word Count: 3973 words

Today you are very grateful that your manager and coworkers didn’t ask why you are taking the day off. The last thing you need is someone asking when you are a god awful liar. Anything you would’ve come up with on the fly would’ve been suspicious. But you can’t very well tell your coworkers you are taking the day off to lose your virginity.

Honestly, they would probably be relieved that you finally decided someone was worthy of your time. It has come up in conversation before. You’ve heard a few too many stories about your coworker’s questionable adventure. Baristas often talk about very inappropriate things when there’s a lull in business.

Many things led you to the point where you are paying someone to take your virginity. At some point, probably around 24 (nearly three years ago), you realized there was no one that you were interested in that way. No one lives up to your standards to the point where it’s been so long you just never thought it would happen. You didn’t want some scummy guy from Tinder to be the first person that sees you completely naked in an intimate setting.

In a drunken moment of desperation two weeks ago you searched the internet for someone to take your virginity. For what must've been at least two hours you searched through the listing trying to find something promising. A user who calls himself Namgyu had many positive comments that didn’t look like they were from spam accounts. When you woke up in the morning you had already paid the non-refundable deposit and decided you might as well go through with this. After all, this guy does this for a living. He must know what he’s doing on some level if he’s who he says he is.

Namgyu sent you an email last night with instructions on where to meet him. The hotel you are meeting him at is just a few blocks away from where you work. He told you to request a key card from the front desk and then let yourself in. Your heart is pounding in your chest as you speak to the well dressed man at the front desk. There are no issues and he just points you in the right direction.

The fabric of your skirt rides up as you walk and you tug it back down. You take a deep breath in front of the door and check your phone to make sure your best friend can see your location. Once you’ve confirmed that you swipe the keycard and your heart drops when it works. This is really happening. You are about to let a random man on the internet take your virginity.

The red light on the door turns green as you swipe the card. Your heart is sent pounding as you open the heavy door and step into the short hallway. A shuffling sound comes from further inside the room. You take a step forward, after removing your shoes, as his head peaks into view then halt while your heart drops to your stomach.

“Seokjin?” You question eyes widening as your jaw drops. “You told me you’re an accountant!”

Standing in front of you in just a pair of jeans slung low on his hips is your favorite regular. He is wearing a matching face of shock. You are trying not to stare at his pronounced abs but it’s so hard when you’ve fantasized about him far too many times on slow days. Have his shoulders always been so impossibly wide? Has his waist always been so delicately tiny? Usually he wears baggy sweaters when he’s getting his morning coffee.

“My eyes are up here, noona.” He steps closer, placing a gentle finger under your chin to guide it upwards. You swear your heart skips a beat. Everything in you wants to scream but you can’t do that. You have to remain cool and act like he isn’t driving you crazy already. “I could’ve been an accountant, but this is a lot more fun. Come on, let's talk for a minute.”

He removes his finger from your chin and walks into the room. The room is pretty spacious, there's even a couch. You can only imagine what someone on the couch has watched happen on the bed. Seokjin sits on the corner of the bed facing the couch. You take a seat on the couch crossing your ankles and sitting up straight. When you don’t say anything he speaks with a calm smile. He is reminding you of someone else but you can’t put your finger on it.

“If this is uncomfortable for you I’ll give you a full refund. I don’t normally do that but you are the only person that can make my coffee correctly and I really like the conversations we have.”

Seokjin has been coming to the coffee shop you work at for nearly two years. Your coworkers always encourage you to ask for his number but you’ve never worked up the courage. He seems so entirely out of your league. Everything about him is perfect even at seven in the morning before his morning coffee. His tousled hair and the cute pout that forms on his lips as he waits warms your heart.

“That wasn’t just in my head?” You mutter then slap your hand to your mouth when you realize you’ve said that out loud.

“You talk to me about genuinely interesting things instead of the weather or traffic.” he pauses and a smirk creeps onto his lips. “I suppose it doesn’t hurt that you’re incredibly beautiful.”

There is no way he just said that. You cover your face with your hands knowing it’s turning bright red from the flattery. Maybe your coworkers are right. A few of them struck out with him. You are the only person at your job he’s been even slightly receptive to. You can’t imagine why.

He takes people’s virginities for a living; his confidence must be through the roof. From the little you know of him you imagine he would be a sweet and caring lover. That’s probably really weird to be thinking of a customer, but right now you are his customer.

You keep your eyes off of his toned form while you try to form a coherent thought. On the bedside table you see a mask that reminds you of who else he is reminding you of. You gasp, eyes tearing back to study exposed chest. Your favorite regular is a porn star on magicshop.com. Seokjin has a series where he films himself taking people’s virginity while wearing masks to protect their anonymity. His content is exactly what you imagined he’d be like. You can’t believe you’ve been watching him for the last year without ever realizing who he was. There is something comforting yet hot about watching how gentle and caring this sexy man can be.

“Moonshine?!?” You blurt his screen name and follow it with something possibly desperate. But can anything truly be more desperate than paying him to take your virginity? “Okay, we are definitely doing this.”

Seokjin’s face splits into a grin and he can’t hold back his laughter. He falls back onto the bed continuing to chuckle for a moment before he sits up. Seokjin joins you on the couch sitting just a few inches away.

“You’re a fan of my work?” He reaches a hand out searching for yours. “Can I touch you?”

“Yes, to both.” You say softly wondering if he can hear the way your heart is hammering in your chest.

His long fingers thread between yours and he strokes your thumb with his own in a comforting gesture. He brushes your hair away from your neck with his other hand and considers something for a moment before he speaks.

“Part of me wants to ask my usual questions, but the other part of me wants to know what your favorite video is.”

The fact that you indeed have an answer to that question shows how deeply you are interested in his content. He makes a lot of videos but there is one person that you love seeing him with more than any of his other regulars.

“It feels embarrassing to say out loud.” You admit because no one else would ever speak to you about this. Well, maybe your secret twitter mutuals would.

“Noona, it’s okay.” He takes your face between his hands forcing you to look in his eyes. “There is nothing to be embarrassed about. I want to know what you think of my work. I want to know what excites you.”

He releases your face scooting closer to you until your thighs are flush. Seokjin resumes holding your hand playing with your fingers as he waits for you to respond.

“I like your videos with Cupid best.”

Cupid’s sunny and expressive personality shines, even through the screen of your laptop at two in morning. He doesn’t show his face on Seokjin’s channel but he does have his own channel. Sometimes he will speak before the video starts and the difference between his cheerful speaking and his sexy serious face never fails to shock you. It would be a horrible lie if you said you hadn’t thought of being eiffel towered by them.

“There’s a video with him coming out next week. We tried something different.” His smirks tells you he knows just how badly you are dying to know what it is. “Have you thought about being between us? All our attention, just for you.” he whispers in your ear and it sends a shiver of pleasure down your spine.

Only a mess of unintelligible words will come out if you speak so you nod your head. You can feel your pussy getting wet just from his words.

“Can I turn on the camera?” He squeezes your hand and trails the other one over the exposed skin of your thigh. “If you want to stop at any point that is okay. If you feel uncomfortable please let me know and we will stop and talk about it. We will only continue if you want.”

“Can I kiss you first?” You say softly not knowing where the sudden boldness came from.

“Of course. This is about you.”

Seokjin pulls you off the couch so you aren’t at an awkward angle. His plump lips are pulled into a small smile as he waits for you to make the first move. You take a deep breath and kiss silky lips. Kissing is something that you are quite familiar with thankfully.

He lightly grips your waist leaving a little room. You let your hands rest on his bare shoulders. Anxiety is buzzing in your stomach but you are trying to remind yourself that if he doesn’t like it he won’t do it.

You allow him to deepen the kiss with a mix of butterflies and nervousness churning in your stomach. His hand slides to your ass earning a small gasp from you. He pulls away making sure everything is okay. He waits a moment accessing your face. You don’t want to wait and pull him back to your lips by the back of his neck. He hums in surprise and squeezes your ass over your skirt.

Your hands trail lower tracing the dips of his toned stomach with your fingertips. From watching his content you know he loves delicate touches like this. He’s said it drives him crazy and leaves his skin feeling tingly.

Seokjin is by the far the most skilled person you’ve ever kissed. Your essence is soaking your panties from just his simple touches.

“You can turn the camera on.” You say looking into his deep brown eyes.

You take a seat on the bed watching as he pulls multiple tripods and cameras from the closet. He quickly sets them up and you feel a bit of pride when you notice a bulge in his pants. You grab the mask that covers the top half of your face and put it on. Seokjin also puts on his mask before hitting record. He doesn’t speak until he joins you on the bed.

“You’re a fan of my videos?” He asks again for the cameras sitting in front of you on the bed. He runs his hand up and down your bare thigh.

“Watching you helps me feel good.”

He smirks, pushing his hand under your shirt to touch the sensitive skin over your ribs. You take a deep breath trying to not show how much it’s affecting you. Of course, that’s pointless no one has ever touched you like this.

“Do you like hearing me say dirty girl? Do you imagine I’m saying it to you?” He moves his hand even further up touching the lacey bra you bought especially for this occasion.

A chill runs straight to your pussy at his words. You nod your head enthusiastically and help him remove your shirt. He stares at your cleavage with a thoughtful expression before leaning in to kiss your breasts. He sucks a mark onto your skin without asking like he knows you will say yes to whatever you want.

“You’re so hot.”

“Noona, I don’t think you realize the effect you have on people.” He kisses your shoulder while using his other hand to inch closer and closer to your cunt. He is centimeters from touching the matching lace panties you so carefully chose. “You radiate charm in a way that even captures the attention of strangers.”

You almost roll your eyes but are distracted when he grabs your hand and places it directly on his clothed cock. Instinctively you squeeze feeling the large girth of his cock in your hand. Your pussy tingles thinking of this being deep inside of you. If only he would move to touching you like that. But you suppose he knows how to not overwhelm you too quickly.

He gives you an encouraging hum before pulling you into his lap. He lifts you, putting himself into a better angle for the cameras. Seokjin positions you so his strong thigh is between your legs. You wonder if he can feel your wetness on his leg. Seokjin puts his hands on your hips gently guiding you to drag your cunt against his leg.

The friction gives you relief you’ve been desperately craving. His strong leg feels so different from the soft pillows you’ve grinded against before. It’s an entirely new sensation. Pleasure is blooming through your whole body. He takes one of your perky nipples into his mouth earning a gasp. His hot tongue flicks over the nub and a moan falls from your soft lips.

The feeling of Seokjin touching you is far more satisfying than anything you’ve done to yourself. He lets you grind on his leg for just a few minutes before he lifts you onto the bed. He removes your skirt and underwear leaving your underwear in frame but tossing the skirt away. You feel shy suddenly having Seokjin see you completely naked. He stands pulling off his pants and underwear in one fluid motion. Your favorite regular lies on his stomach between your legs and begins kissing the sensitive skin of your inner thigh. He barely gave you a chance to look at his cock, not that you haven’t seen it in his videos before. Seeing his girthy cock in person is completely different then seeing it on screen even if his cameras have insanely good quality.

“Do you want me to finger you like you do to yourself when you watch my videos?” His fingers trail towards your pussy but stop short, teasing. “I hope I can make you feel even better, Noona.”

A bolt of excitement shoots to your chest at his words. On more than one occasion you’ve fingered yourself while watching him take other people’s virginities. You never imagined you’d end up here minutes away from losing your own.

“Please, make me feel good.” You manage to whine and he drags his fingers over your slit.

You can’t hold in the gasp as he wets his finger in your juices. He traces around your hole with the tip of his finger while he kisses your thighs. You try to relax your tense muscles knowing everything will feel better if you are relaxed.

A low moan escapes your mouth when he gently pushes his index finger inside of you. He kisses your clit before sucking it into his mouth. That earns him an even louder moan and he uses the moment to slide his finger further inside. You like the sensation of his finger so much you wonder why you ever bothered doing it yourself. Could you have been experiencing this the whole time? Have you been missing out or is Seokjin an outlier?

Seokjin laps his tongue over your clit and you swear you see stars. You grab at the sheets beside you not knowing what to do with your hands. Your back arches off the bed when he decides to add a second finger and begins pushing them in and out of you at a leisurely pace.

“You’re so pretty.” He mumbles against your pussy. He drags his tongue through your slit with an s motion. A constant stream of moans is being recorded for all of your favorite regular’s fans to hear. “I love tasting you, noona.”

You look into the camera to your left before focusing on the man eating your pussy like it’s the only thing he ever wants to do. How lucky are you that the first tongue to ever touch you knows exactly how to make you tick? Your legs are shaking within minutes and you can feel Seokjin’s face pulling into a pleased smile.

“Moon, please fuck me.”

He locks eyes with you. His eyes are wide like he didn’t expect you to be so direct. Seokjin knows the effect he’s having on you but always wants to see how far he can push it before they start begging.

“Yes, Noona.” He says with a smile as he sits up and reaches for the top drawer of the nightstand. He quickly tears a condom off the row and unwraps it. You watch as he puts it on knowing he’ll cut this out of the video. Seokjin scoots closer to you as he finishes rolling the condom down his length. He slots himself between your legs and leans down to kiss your neck. “Are you ready?”

“I’m ready.” You whisper and he kisses you.

Seokjin’s soft lips kiss you as the tip of his cock pushes inside of your cunt. He is gentle knowing he can be a lot to take. Your hands grip his broad shoulders trying not to dig your nails into his skin. You aren’t sure that would be appreciated.

You pull away from the kiss cursing as he pushes slightly further in. He kisses your neck as you get used to the feeling of his cock inside of you. Your favorite regular inside of you fills you up better than any toy ever could. Heat pools in your stomach urging you to move yourself on his cock. Seokjin sits up watching the change in your expression.

As if he can read your mind he slowly pulls out nearly all the way and pushes himself back inside. You want more but he feels so good you lie there and let him do what he wants to you. His fingers are gripping your hips, guiding them onto his cock slowly. There are so many things you wish you could tell him to do but only a steady flow of moans leaves your mouth.

“You’re taking my cock so well, noona.” He grunts thrusting into you with more force this time. This time you are sure you see stars. How can one man make you feel like you are floating so easily? “So pretty letting me fuck into your tight pussy like its all mine.”

“More!” You plead, grabbing his face so he looks you in the eyes. “I can take it, Moon! Please.”

He takes your left hand off his face and kisses your knuckles. Seokjin leans down kissing your breasts as he pumps himself into you. He moves the kisses up your neck and thrusts faster hitting the perfect spot inside of you that has you digging your nails into his shoulders.

“Yes, noona!” He moans into your ear and you scratch down his back. His cock pulses inside you so you do it again. “Ahhh you feel so good.”

He thrusts deep into you pushing you closer and closer to your high with every movement. There is no room for insecurity when he is making you feel the most pleasure you’ve ever felt in your whole life. The sound of his cock sliding in and out of your wet cunt adds to experience. He made you the wettest you’ve ever been with just a few simple moves.

You aren’t able to warn him before you are cumming on his cock pussy squeezing him in. Your legs are shaking as Seokjin continues fucking into you searching for his own high. Seokjin watches you throw your head back against the pillows completely wrecked by his cock and it sends him over his own edge. He spills into the condom, riding it out inside of you before he pulls out.

He gets off the bed taking care of the condom and turning off the cameras before he lies beside you. Seokjin opens his arms inviting you to cuddle into his chest. Of course, you take the offer and listen to the rapid beat of his heart.

“How are you feeling?” He asks after a few minutes have passed. He’s stroking your hair as you draw patterns on his chest with your finger. “You are a natural. It seemed like you really enjoyed yourself.”

“You made me feel the best I’ve ever felt. I really did enjoy myself.”

You peek up at him and there’s a soft smile on his lips. Not a cocky smile, just a nice smile. A bead of sweat drips down his face. He really put in the work to make sure your first time was memorable.

“So I don’t have to find a new barista?”

This sends both of you into a fit of giggles. Seokjin hugs you closer to him and kisses the crown of your head. You end up lying there naked talking to your favorite regular for far longer than you thought you would. He tells you more about how he got into this business and why he stayed. At the end of the conversation you are thinking you might enjoy posting someone of your own spicy content.

It’s nearly two hours later by the time you get dressed and pay Seokjin. You are wondering if what you want to ask is appropriate given the circumstances, but you don’t think he treated you like a normal client.

“Can I have your number?” You decide to ask knowing you’ll regret it if you don’t ask now.

“Do you want to do this again?” He asks cheekily, handing you his cell phone from the bedside table.

How is he still sending flurries of butterflies to your chest? You enter your info into his phone before you answer. He is half dressed standing in front of you and you are proud when he turns around and you see the marks you left on his back.

“I didn’t get to suck your dick. I think you’d be a great teacher.” You flutter your lashes at him hoping that he’ll take the offer.

“I didn’t get to suck your dick. I think you’d be a great teacher.” You flutter your lashes at him hoping that he’ll take the offer.

“You’re going to be the end of me, noona.”

He pulls you in for one last kiss before you leave wondering if sex and life just gets better from here.

[diejager]

OnlyFans

Pairing: cod men x fem!sex worker!reader

Cw: OnlyFans, sex work, prostitution, paid sex, voyeurisme, P in V, unprotected sex, sex machines, handjob, smut, more will be added.

Summary: it was a stroke of luck that Soap found something so sweet and addictive as you, a little angel dressed in black lace and the prettiest pout with glossy lips.

Parts:

Discovery

Fans

Draw

Technical Issues

First

Master

Reunion

[lgbtlunaverse]

The women Jin Guangyao uses to kill Jin Guangshan are NOT from the brothel he grew up in

Except for Sisi, obviously.

But, crucially, Sisi MOVED brothels after her face got slashed.

That's why Jin Guangyao only recognized her after Jin Guangshan was already dead. If he had sourced the women from the brothel he grew up in, you think he wouldn't have made sure beforehand that they wouldn't include the one woman who was explicitly nice to him and his mother? He couldn't bear to kill her even after she was already a witness, but that meant he had to imprison her instead. Not exactly an ideal scenario! You think he wouldn't have thought to avoid that?

Well, that's all hypothetical anyway, because he couldn't have sourced anyone from the brothel he grew up in anyway, because that brothel had already been burnt down. By Jin Guangyao! This is the order he gives Xue Yang at the end of the villainous friends extra, which also contains Xue Yang meeting Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan. Which means this is way before Xue Yang kills the Chang clan, Xiao Xingchen eventually catches him, and Nie Mingjue kicks Jin Guangyao down the stairs which leads to his death 2 months later. And Jin Guangshan doesn't die until after Nie Mingjue is already dead, so while this is definitely where Jin Guangyao starts planning to kill his father, it's well before he actually executed that plan. By the time he does, that brothel is ash.

I say this because there's been several time now where I've seen people attribute Jin Guangyao using sex workers to kill his father, and killing them aferwards, to some kind of revenge scheme? A way to get back at the other women in the brothel who mistreated his mom at the same time as he gets back at his father. But all those women died when it burned to the ground. We see their ghosts in guangyin temple! Every single woman Jin Guangyao uses to kill his father and then later executes was a complete stranger to him. It has nothing to do with who they are and everything to do with what they are (older 'ugly' sex workers) Whether you think that makes his actions worse or better or generally has no moral impact i'll leave up to you. But it's important to remember that while the violence he enacts on his father is deeply personal, what he does to the sex workers is not.

[kadkadduwa]

let me be frank. i bring up people treating lacroix like a baby while sexualizing nines and ignoring some the integral parts of his character A LOT. maybe it's kind of annoying, but i think about it a lot because this (strange) behavior mirrors the way people treat white vs. ethnic characters in other media too. and by strange i mean dehumanizing.

[silentangell95]

Филми и сериали: Юли

[cravetive]

𝚆𝙷𝙴𝙽 𝙸𝚃 𝚁𝙰𝙸𝙽𝚂

☾ ⋆*･ Pairings: Meteorologist! Jin x Fem!reader

☾ ⋆*･ Synopsis: after many failed relationships you find yourself struggling to open up to new connections but once you overhear that your timid colleague Seokjin has a crush on you, you set out to play a game of temptation where somewhere in the process, you come face to face with the sudden realization that the weather is not the only unpredictable thing.

☾ ⋆*･ Warnings: SMUT! workplace/office au, Jin is quiet and innocent until he's not, fingering, oral sex! ( M! receiving ), dirty talk, creampie ( hehe) , teasing, unprotected sex, hair pulling, hardcore, a bit angsty ( im an angst slut leave me alone ) , foreplay , slight dom/sub dynamics, kissing, biting/marking, we will pray Y/n gets her life together.

☾ ⋆*･ Authors note: I wish I could tell you what I've done but this is what my brain produces when I'm on 5 hours of sleep.

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ Word count: 10 K ( for what reason?)

-

Ever since you were conscious you would often find yourself lost in the sky - entrained on the sun, the moon, and the stars but most importantly on the weather. Even before you could walk You wondered what caused thunders to ripple through the clouds, worried over the sun that disappeared during rainfall. You were fixated, overly obsessed and it is what had led you to become a research meteorologist and whilst some found the profession to be boring and fruitless (your parents), there was nothing in the world that you loved most then to predict cloudy skies and cold nights. Being able to observe, understand, and therefore explain the earth's atmospheric phenomenons offers you a sense of gratification.

On the other hand you couldn’t say you ran with the same luck when it came to love and relationships, your long list of exes and failed talking stages were enough scientific evidence to prove that. Things just never ended well between you and whoever fate decided to send your way. you could never decipher if it was due to the lack of communication, lack of interest, or a little bit of both that prevented you from harvesting anything solid with those you fell in love with but it always left you high and dry. It wasn’t like you were a hopeless romantic either, yet the instincts you had when it came to forecasting sunny skies were just not there when it came to romance.

To put it bluntly, your relationships just didn’t last and it had brought you to a point where you questioned all your romantic interactions.

How long will this one last? How long until this one ends? Will we see each other in public and turn the other way?

It's why you struggled to get your feelings across most times, it's why you found it almost impossible to tell that certain person who sat across from you at work how he made you feel.

The timid and reserved Junior meteorologist didn’t catch your attention at first, always keeping to himself and rarely participating in any after work activities with your co-workers, which had made it almost impossible for you to even notice him. that was until 3 weeks ago during a mandatory work dinner. Whilst on a small bathroom break you had unintentionally walked into a game of truth and dare between your colleagues where by perhaps fate you had eavesdropped on the confession of that very same drunken man.

You had opted to feign ignorance, slipping back into the table as if nothing had happened all whilst deciding to commence a cruel game against the meek man. You would find yourself teasing him, subtly flirting until his cheeks turned red and his words turned into stutters. At first it was a childish fun ruse but as time progressed you found yourself looking in his direction more often, entranced by his smile and quiet charisma.

You were doomed and yet, it didn’t stop you from taunting him. small winks and little comments of how good he looked in his baseball caps and soft sweaters, causing him to often jolt as a response. It was harmless until it wasn’t, until you started imagining him between your legs, his large and skillful hands wrapped around your neck.

“for fucks sake” Daiyu, your best friend and colleague huffed as she ran towards the entrance, her freshly styled copper hair drenched with rain that poured from the sunny sky. You giggled, closing your umbrella and entering the building, your heels squeaking against the marbled floors. Daiyu followed after you, a trail of curses falling from her mouth whilst her hands frantically wiped at her wet clothes.

“I always tell you to carry an umbrella and you never listen” you sighed.

“It was a 30% chance!” she exclaimed, reaching to frantically press on the elevator button.

“I should sue you guys” Daiyu groaned.

You looked back at her, taking in her flustered and soaked appearance, deciding not to pass further judgment. Daiyu was as stubborn as a bull and anything that you chose to say would just  go  through one ear and out the other anyways. you reached into your purse and grabbed a napkin, extending it out for her to take. She snatched it urgently and dabbed on her face, emitting a groan of frustration at the inconvenience the sky had caused her.

“It was so sunny and warm outside” she complained, which caused you to laugh loudly, both of you stepping into the elevator as the doors slid open.

“Looks can be deceiving Daiyu” you noted, watching as the doors closed in front of you.

Daiyu smirked, disregarding your statement and focusing on the current situation you were in. her mind going back to the late-night conversation you both had shared 2 days ago over wine and expensive cheese. She leaned over closer to you, her eyebrows teasingly raising while you shared a bewildered expression on your face.

“what?” you asked, concerned with her inquisitive glances.

“I guess the same thing can be said about Jin,” Daiyu winked, a hint of excitement in her tone. She goaded you to speak on the subject, but you rolled your eyes in response.

“I bet he is a real beast in the sheets” Daiyu raised her eyebrows.

“Daiyu please, this is not the time or place to have this conversation” you scolded - eyes fixed on the numbers that flashed on the small screen above the elevator panel. 

“I guess you are deceiving - look at you all serious now like you aren't torturing that poor man.”

“Daiyu” your eyes widened and she was lucky you were both alone in the elevator - out of hearing range of any nosy employee’s. 

“I didn’t share that with you so that you can hold it over my head” you snapped, making a quick escape as soon as the elevator doors opened.

“oh come on!” she shouted after you, the sound of her heels echoing inside the office as she chased after you, her arm interlinking with yours when she caught up. you didn’t intend to avoid the topic, in fact you found it relieving to be able to speak to someone freely about it but what Daiyu was trying to indicate with her previous statements were by far completely illogical. 

Jin was but a shy and reserved guy, not the kind that tried to deceive by putting on appearances. 

How else was he able to contain himself by your constant teasing and flirting, if he wasn’t.

“we will talk about this later” you declared, giving her a soft shove towards her desk. Daiyu pouted, providing you a saddened glance whilst reluctantly dragging herself to her desk where she threw herself into her chair in rather dramatic defeat. You giggled at the scene she produced and walked across the room, reaching your own desk.

Seokjin was already there, too focused on the screen in front of him to notice your arrival. You took this time to take in his appearance. the sweater he wore accentuating his biceps and broad shoulders, the pair of glasses that sat on the bridge of his nose causing a pulsation between your thighs - lured by the image of him crawling over you with them on. You cleared your throat quickly, grabbing his attention and interrupting your perverted train of thought.

He glanced up at you, cheeks already turning pink as he took in your presence.

“Good Morning Mr. Kim” you whispered, offering him a smug smile whilst sliding into your chair. It took a moment for him to respond, his eyes briefly falling on the low v neck blouse you decided to wear today (one of your many little tricks of course). His lips parted, a gulp traveling down his throat. He quickly removed his eyes from your accentuated breasts, dragging his attention back to his screen.

“G-good Morning” he stumbled on the phrase, his tone quiet and faint.

you smiled out of satisfaction, unable to suppress the butterflies in your stomach that only he managed to make flutter. Seokjin is sexy in the most subtle ways; he doesn’t even try and yet he could make you squirm in your seat like a schoolgirl. His full lips, his deep intense eyes, and dorky smile kindled a pressure in your lower abdomen that you often tried to conceal by crossing your legs. 

“I like that color on you, you look good” you complimented, offering Jin a small smirk.

Jin glanced down at his sweater, his hands smoothing out the cashmere deep blue material. He had liked the color, had even thought it was a nice sweater when he first picked it out at the store but having its tincture complimented by you now, gave it a new feeling - it felt softer against his skin.

“thank you” he almost muttered.

You nodded happily, bringing your hair into a ponytail as you always did when beginning the day. Jin’s eyes hesitantly trailed your exposed neck, carving out the smoothness of your skin and studying each detail of the necklace that hung there - soon halting at the sight of your lips, a breath hitching in his throat. 

“You like what you see, Mr. Kim?” you asked, your eyes sparking with the realization of his discreet stare.

Jin sat up,your voice startling him out of his daze - his eyes now looking in every direction but yours.

“cause you can see more if you want, you just have to ask” your voice was a mere whisper and Jin could feel every hair in his body stand up from your tone alone. There was a long silence, your eyes intensively studying his composure. He moved his attention back on his computer screen, deciding it would be best to ignore the comment that made his heart run laps inside his chest all together.

“Hey Jin” you called, his eyes quickly moving back to you with hesitation.

“I'm only joking” you lied.

You would've allowed him to see your entire soul if he had just asked.

The day had turned sour rather quickly, the entire office thrown into a frenzy by the threat of an incoming spring storm and it had left you running in circles all throughout the building, your heels beginning to jab into your feet painfully- leaving your soles red and sore. You groaned, stepping into the cafeteria for the first time in the day, finally allowing yourself a small break amidst the hysteria. You needed coffee and you needed it fast. Your heavy eyes scanned the cabinet in search for your favorite mug - propping yourself on your toes for a better view. 

“Where the hell did I put you?” you muttered under your breath, your hands pushing away various mugs in an attempt to find the deep emerald one you always used. Your shoulders ached, weighed down by the tumultuous day and your eyes burned, the result of staring at your computer screen for 4 hours straight. Not finding your mug would be the last straw, the drop of water that would make you spill over. You groaned loudly and leaned against the counter, your hand flying to cover your face in frustration while you balanced from one foot to the other, trying to ease the ache shooting up your legs.

“Are you looking for this?” a quiet and familiar voice asked.

You raised your head slowly, capturing a view of the man standing in front of you, your mug held comfortably in his hand. Exhaustion creeped through your body, leading you to bubble with irrational anger but as you prepared to berate the individual who had seized your precious mug, you took a moment to study their fingers, soon realizing they were the hands you melted over ever so often, concluding who the culprit behind the theft was.

Jin offered you a concerned glance, his profound sepia eyes blinking slowly as if expecting a response. You remained silent, losing yourself in his stare. the ache on your limbs suddenly evaporating for those short seconds, a wave of serenity settling deep inside of you. you shook your head slowly, unable to break eye contact as he made time stop around you.

All urgency to resume your pending tasks halted whilst you stood in front of him - The buzzling in the office growing quiet as your eyes slowly traced his features.

“I can wash it out if you want, I’m done anyways” Jin offered, a small smile forming on his face.

Your attention crawled to his mouth, inspecting his plump and soft lips, lips you wanted to press yours against, lips that were smeared with the cold foam of his coffee, foam you imagined on other parts of his body for you to lick.

“n-no, it's okay” this time it was you who stuttered; it was you who grew flustered.

The room fell silent as you remained stunned by his intense stare, your mind flowing with ideas that were neither appropriate nor sane. You were in deep shit, and you knew it, your heart pressed against your chest begging to jump into the hands of the man standing before you whilst your mind yelled that he was like everyone else, like every guy you had ever met. The one with the soft eyes and quick lies.

“You uh have something” you gestured to his mouth, making him aware of the leftover foam on his lips.

He lowered his head in embarrassment, his hand quickly flying to wipe away at his face. his eyes trailed away from yours, causing you to inhale sharply.

“Did I get it?” he asked, turning back to you. His cheeks still flushed with shame.

You inspected his lips once again, taking in their smoothness and soft pink color, pictured them gracing your skin softly - leaving their imprint on your skin.

“Here I’ll-” you offered, reaching forward and closing the gap between you both. you leisurely wiped away at the top of his lip with your thumb, removing all the residual foam left there. His lips were warm under your touch, your breaths growing short and unruly due to the sensation.

You could feel his stare fixed on you as you aided him, your cheeks becoming rogue at the sudden intimacy of the situation. Jin’s mouth parted as if he had wanted to say something but even if he had you doubted you would have been able to hear him over the hammering of your heart. The euphoric feeling dazed you out of all self restraint - luring you to act upon your intrusive thoughts .

you found yourself losing yourself in the sea of brown that were his eyes again, knowing you could drown and subsequently, dipped your foam covered thumb into your mouth without a second thought.

You collected the sugar that had once rested on his lips on your tongue and allowed it to rest there. A pleasure filled hum echoing from within your chest - your eyes fluttering shut at the satisfaction the fulfillment of your craving caused. You remained stuck there, your brain unable to generate anything but utter bliss. 

“hey! Is there any creamer lef…”

The voice of the intern entering the cafeteria was like cracking thunder, your body jerking as a life vest was being thrown at you, aiding you from going under. Your eyes shot open in realization, body tensing at the action you had just mindlessly committed but Jin didn’t appear to be as startled as you, his eyes firmly held on your lips. It felt like your whole body was on fire and it was only then when you noted the damp fabric of your panties pressed against your clit. 

Both you and Jin turned your heads quickly, eyes landing on the intern who stood shocked by the door, his mouth held ajar. You blinked quickly; your brain unable to register what had just taken place. it was as if everything inside you had been electrocuted and you couldn’t even find the strength to defend yourself against the silent accusation the interns eyes made.

You dreadfully took a step back from Jin, lowering your gaze once he looked back at you - you cleared your throat quickly before stumbling out of the shared space. The sound of your heels leaving echoes inside of Jin’s head.

You had deduced 2 things from that brief encounter. The first being you and Jin were beyond screwed - interns liked to talk, liked to share and gossip didn't take long to spread within the office and secondly, that being alone in a room with Jin was dangerous, far more than you had anticipated.

“Yup, it's been sent to the group chat” Daiyu nodded, pushing a spoon full of yogurt into her mouth.

You sighed, covering your face in agony.

As expected the details of your little encounter with Jin had been shared all throughout the office with the intern taking quite the creative liberty of disclosing details you were sure never happened. You groaned loudly, pushing your food away. 

“Oh god” you whispered, “we work together, you know I can lose my job right?” you stared at her, wide eyed but your friend didn’t join your panic, instead a small giggle escaped her lips and your eyebrows intertwined in confusion.

“Do you find this funny?” you yelled, throwing a balled-up napkin at her head.

“Hey! Let’s use our words” she laughed, causing you to throw your head back in defeat.

“What did you think was going to happen Y/n? Jin is a man and you are a woman - i'm surprised you haven't humped in the janitors closet yet” she mused. 

You pressed your hands against your temples, trying to stop yourself from imagining the both of you doing the mentioned act. 

“Relax, it’s not that bad” she responded, “besides their just rumors, okay?” you knew she was trying to calm you, trying to bring you back from the trepidation you had been succumbing to during the last few days but her words didn’t offer any relief, anxiety running through your entire body quickly and mercilessly.

“you know I almost believed it but then he added that Jin had his hands wrapped around your waist and I had to debunk it” Daiyu shared, swallowing the yogurt in her mouth “cause we both know that boy would simply combust if he even graced his finger tips against your skin.”

You shot bullets in her direction, how was she able to make a joke out of all of this when you were literally falling apart? your job on the line, your reputation. Everything you had worked so hard to get and maintain all down the gutter for a man and Yet, there wasn’t even a hint of regret in your thoughts, in fact the only reason why you were so stressed out in the first place was for the simple fact that you were caught,caught doing something so frivolous and yet the whole office was in an uproar about it.

If you knew you would be at the brink of getting fired over lingering stares and kinship, you would’ve at least given yourself the liberty of kissing him.

“Hey, you are in your head again” Daiyu yelled, snapping her fingers in your face. you blinked in her direction and sighed, turning away once again.

“Can this get any worse?” you complained.

“I think it just might,” Daiyu winced.

You glanced back at her and turned your head in the direction of her widened eyes. The director had stepped into the cafeteria, and he was walking straight to you. you felt your body tremble, your brain preparing for the worst. You quickly stood up, your entire nervous system beginning to shut down.

“Ms. Y/n” he greeted, you stood completely still, unable to bring any air into your lungs as your knees threatened to collapse.

“Mr. Han,” your voice trembled.

Daiyu stood up quickly, putting down her yogurt and offering your boss a 90 degree bow before standing up straight, giving you a panicked glance.

“Ms. Y/n do you have a moment? I would like to go over some things in my office” your heart dropped, your palms clammy. You soon became very aware of every vein in your body, pulsating strongly against your skin.

your throat went dry, sandpaper rubbing against the other as you tried to form a coherent response.

“I uh I – yeah”

He turned quickly without another word, his steps firm and demanding, you followed behind him like a lost puppy, glancing back at Daiyu; your eyes brimmed with tears. she attempted to give you a smile through her concerned expression but even her movements faltered when she offered you a thumbs up. You were screwed, you had gone too far in your little game and now you were facing the consequences.

The walk back to Mr. Han’s office felt eternal, passing coworkers who stared and mumbled amongst each other. You were dragging your feet at this point, your heart plummeting into despair the closer you got to his office. In retrospect you didn’t feel contrition towards the event that had taken place, one does not lament over things they enjoyed but now was not the time for you to ponder on the things you did or didn't regret.

one word from your boss and you would be sent packing with all of your hopes and dreams.

You entered his office quietly, brain swarmed with negative thoughts - predicting the words that would soon empty from his mouth.

‘YOU’RE FIRED’ 

The unspoken yet inevitable words rang inside your ears - tears swelling in your eyes out of mere anticipation. 

You let out a long breath, hoping that for a second it could appease your mind but it was no use, you were a nervous wreck and it was evident by the way your boss stared at you whilst he sat behind his desk. You decided to solve math problems in your head, a method that most times distracted you from distressing situations but as you began to find the answer to your first algebra problem you felt a presence next to you and when you glanced over, your legs buckled.

“please take a seat guys” your boss requested.

You tried to move your limbs, but your feet were stuck to the ground, eyes fixed on Jin whilst he avoided your gaze and pushed out his chair taking a seat as instructed. He didn't greet you as he tended to do nor did he give you one of his famous small introverted smiles you often looked forward to. It was as if you weren’t even there but you were and it was as if he couldn’t care less. 

Ouch…

he was tense, you could see it and It was all your fault. you were fucked, royally fucked. Your shaky hands reached for your own chair, hesitantly slipping next to him.

“I can assume you know why I’ve asked the both of you here” Mr. Han began, your stomach somersaulting painfully. You glanced over at Jin who remained silent, not a speck of anxiousness in his demeanor. Why was he so relaxed? Had he just accepted his fate? Your face contorted with conflict and then turned to face your boss, a long weighed sigh leaving your body.

“I want to apologize, I know that it wasn’t ethical and I assume full responsibility-“ you began rambling, your mouth going painfully dry. your boss stared back at you like you had 3 heads and your voice faded into thin air, further apprehension spreading inside of you.

“Y/n, I can attest you are really good at your job but why are you apologizing for the weather?” Mr. Han chuckled. you blinked slowly, unable to understand his words.

“huh?”

“look, we might be facing a storm soon and I want to send a group of you over to our headquarters in Yeosu, they will be hit the hardest and in all honesty they need all the help they can get”

Relief and embarrassment flow through you as his intentions are made clear. you let out a small nervous giggle struggling with the intrusive desire to slap yourself across the face.

“I can go on my own,” Jin interrupted, and you quickly turned to him. his face cold and expressionless, your stomach dropping once again and all those bad feelings that had previously  swallowed you, began eating at you all over again.

“I'm sure Ms. Y/n  here has a lot of work on her plate and I'm sure I can do most of the work myself.”

His words were rational, made sense even but you couldn’t stop yourself from thinking this was just the aftermath of the rumors that had been spreading. You understood him, being spoken about and stared at when most times all he wanted to do was go about undetected must’ve been uncomfortable, albeit it made your insides twist.

“oh i'm sure you are more than capable but there will be a lot to cover and I just don’t think you’ll be able to manage.”

“Then give me a team, Ms. Y/n can stay here with the others - I'm sure we will need coverage here too” Jin insisted. you couldn’t bring yourself to protest. It was probably the best idea. You didn’t want any more rumors to spread about the two of you, not when it made Jin treat you like this. The game was over - no longer did you find amusement in your actions, instead you started to regret toying with him in the first place. it was immature on your part and you wanted nothing more than to apologize for your childish ways.

“I can understand your consideration of Ms. Y/n but it wasn’t a request” Mr. Han stated, causing chills to go down your spine.

“the train tickets have been purchased, you will be departing tomorrow morning” your boss concluded.

Jin stood up first, walking out of the room without another word. You followed behind quickly, your head spinning in circles as you tried catching up to him. 

“Jin” you called, but he kept his pace - not bothering to look back at you.

“Jin” you repeated, your voice much louder this time. 

His steps slowed, a sigh falling from his lips before he turned to look at you - you couldn't make out the stare he held once his eyes met with yours but it made you feel like shit. This entire ordeal was making you question the kind of person you were and for the first time since you had begun playing mind games with the man, you had realized how fucked this entire thing was. 

“How can i help you Ms. Y/n” his tone had always been reserved but this time it was different - you could feel the chill from a mile away. 

“I just wanted to say I'm sorry” you breathed. 

“Okay” he answered. 

“Okay?” you questioned, taken aback by his response. 

“Okay” Jin reaffirmed before he spun around and left you standing alone and confused in the empty hallway. 

The train ride had been 3 long painful hours and even though all your colleagues had slept peacefully, including Daiyu who snored into your ear the entire trip you hadn’t been able to stop thinking of Jin. He avoided you like the plague the entire way to Yeosu. Putting on his headphones when it was only the two of you awake, making sure he was the first to exit the train once it arrived, and when you entered the shared home you and your colleagues would be staying in for the longevity of the trip, he intentionally chose the room furthest away from yours.

You decided to just let the situation be, there wasn’t anything you could do now and besides, it didn’t appear like he even wanted an apology. Maybe, seeking him out would only make things worse.

“Have you talked to him?” Daiyu asked, setting up a small satellite on the ground to assist the tracking of the storm.

“no” you muttered, writing down notes in your notepad “and quite frankly I don’t intend to Daiyu.”

“oh come on, we will be here for 2 more days and you guys are just gonna what? Pretend the other is not there? It's making me and everyone else uncomfortable” she complained.

“And what other options do I have? I tried to apologize but he just said okay, like what even is that? okay?!” you huffed with frustration.

“he even stayed in when we said we would go out for drinks” you whisper, the topic alone distracting you from the data you were collecting. The memory caused an ache in your chest, an ache that you didn’t like. It was a faint soreness that had accompanied you many times before, during nights of heartache and rejection, so imperceptible yet debilitating.

“The kid likes you, we know he likes you, you know he likes you, and you like him” Daiyu shrugs “why are you dragging this?” her tone was annoyed but she held a smile on her face.

“it's more complicated than that and you know that” you responded, rolling your eyes.

“ugh whatever keep eye fucking him for all I care” Daiyu groaned.

“Are you all done here? I'll wait in the car” you yelled, taking quick steps away from Daiyu.

“hey! We need to make sure it's stable!” Daiyu yelled out but you ignored her, pretending to be too far to hear her curses.

As predicted the storm had arrived ferociously. Wind ripping through the city, rain pouring harshly - turning the sky opaque. Your dry and pained eyes stared at the computer screen in front of you as you wrote yet another report, racing against mother nature in an attempt to keep up with the current weather. You hadn’t slept in the last 24 hours and the toll it had left was visible. The only thing keeping you awake being the loud crackles of thunder tearing into the sky. 

You had been locked in your room all day and you had no intentions on stepping out.

The rest of the group with the exception of Jin had left to track the storm, giving you hourly updates on the current situation and the damage the storm was leaving in its path. Knowing you were alone with him in the same house left an anxious haze in your system.

You allowed your eyes to flutter shut for a few seconds, giving them some moisture but your mind wandered to another place, drifting deeper into your consciousness - within the darkness of your tightly shut eyes you envisioned Jin’s capable hands. touching, roaming, rubbing. You retracted the image of his mouth, of his tongue. Sliding, licking, pulling. And then there it was, the pooling between your thighs, the pressure under your navel.

Your eyes opened quickly as another thunder rolled through the sky, bright lights seeping through your half-opened blinds, dragging you away from your salacious contemplations.

You needed to clear your mind, to provide your brain another task to focus on before it began to rot. An impulse surged through you, your body rising from the chair it had made a home out of and stepping out into the dark house. What was the worst that could happen? For Jin to ignore you? He was already doing that anyway.

Your steps were soft as you made your way to the kitchen, a cup of chamomile tea sounding delicious at the moment, it would help you fall asleep and above all it would shake away the anxiousness that gripped you. your mouth watered with the idea. 

Aside from the small creaks the foundation of the old home made against the strong wind outside- everything else was completely silent. The gray evening sky offering the only source of light throughout the space.

You reached into the coverts and pulled out a kettle, which you filled with water and set on the stove to boil. Your eyes wandered out the window, concerned with the raging weather that apparently had no intentions on stopping. You were worried for your team, hoping they had found shelter, and you were also worried about running into Jin. all the bravery you had suddenly found in those short seconds when you first decided to leave your room quickly fading away. you blinked slowly, trying to rid yourself of the exhaustion pressing on your body.

 You made mental plans of a warm shower and then finally some rest, if the thunder allowed it.

If your Jin ridened brain would allow it.

There was another crackle in the sky and then the sliding door in the dining room opened and slammed shut, your whole nervous system jolting as a loud scream escaped your mouth. you turned your head to access the damage the wind had probably caused but your made out a figure standing by the door. A drenched, heaving figure. You blinked rapidly, ensuring it wasn’t your imagination and once your brain awakened from its internal slumber you realized that the person standing there, dripping wet from head to toe was Jin.

“Jin?” you exclaimed “are you okay?”

Your feet moved quickly towards him, mind racing with weariness at the sight of him. His presence left a puddle on the floor, his rain slicked black hair stuck to his forehead. He nodded slightly, wanting to avoid further questioning. You reached into the closet nearby and pulled out a clean towel. 

He was shivering, mouth trembling as he stood there in complete silence.

“What were you doing outside? It's dangerous out there” your voice was stern, but you weren’t trying to reprimand him. Jin was a grown man, and you were sure he was aware of the current climate.

“I had forgotten my camera” he simply explained, holding up the canon T7 camera for you to see.

“Gosh, let me help you” you sighed, taking fast steps towards him. your mind was racing with ways you could help him, concerned with his well-being however once you were closer, all those thoughts stopped – paused by the view in front of you. Jin’s black t-shirt was glued to his body, the imprint of his torso visible through the wet material. His face dripped droplets of water as he stared at you with those eyes that you habitually melted over and you weren’t sure if it was due to the rain outside, but his skin appeared to glisten, accentuating the veins that crawled down his forearms and down his hands.

This wasn’t the time to look, to peer like you often did, not a moment to tease but your eyes couldn’t help trail down to his sweats that now due to the weight of the water they had absorbed sat just below his waist, his underwear peeking above them.

You cleared your throat, attempting to remain focused whilst your hands tended to the shivering man in front of you but once the towel touched his skin, his hand came up to grip yours. You looked up at him quickly, your brows knitting with concern. His eyes pierced through you and you recalled the reason why the both of you hadn’t spoken this entire time, remembered the way he had avoided you at all costs.

“don’t do that” his tone was low, a heaviness within it that you had never heard him use before.

“do what?” yours quivered, a crack forming at the last word.

“don’t provoke me,” Jin stated.

The ache returned inside your chest, the one that you hated so much and you felt weak. Your eyes faltered, blinking away from his gaze with a heavy sigh.

“Jin, I want to apologize again, I shouldn’t have-“ you began, unable to recognize the softness in your words - a knot embedding itself in your trachea.

“What are you apologizing for?” his expression was that of confusion and you felt intimidated. The question leaves you disoriented.

“what?” you asked.

“you shouldn’t apologize if you aren’t sorry.”

“but I am” you stood on those words, truly feeling culpable of the situation you had created due to your lack of self control, due to your habit of complicating things but Jin’s words held different meaning which you had missed due to your lack of sleep,or perhaps it was because you couldn’t concentrate on anything else besides the bulge that pressed against his drenched sweats.

 Jin was teasing you.

He stepped closer, his chest now mere inches from yours. His towering build caused you to become very aware of how tall he really was, you didn’t speak another word as the room suddenly shrunk 3 sizes, your breath trapped inside of your rib cages.

“I take pride in the kind of man that I am” he muttered, leaning his face towards yours. “im respectful – a well mannered man” Jin’s eyes trailed down to your lips and he watched them intently as they parted slightly. 

“I am a civil man” he whispered, his hand rising to caress the skin of your cheek softly - erupting goosebumps everywhere inside of you. the shy and concealed man you had come to know had disappeared, leaving no traces of innocence – his stare flickering with lust. His thumb smoothed over your mouth and you could feel your heart rumble within your chest, your body trembling with each outlet of air.

“but you continue to toy with me, you appear in my dreams where I find myself doing the most indecent things to you” the confession made you lean into his touch, the realization of how good his hand felt pressed against your cheek eliminating all hesitation “it makes me question what a gracious man like me can do.”

“Jin” you trembled, body running feverishly warm as you bore into his eyes.

His hand traveled to the back of your head, his fingers intertwining with strands of your hair and he pulled, firmly but yet not hard enough to cause pain – your mouth opened as a whine traveled through your throat but before it could escape; his lips landed on yours.

 his tongue twisting away the small complaint.

It felt like a dream, like it wasn't real and for a second you wanted to pinch yourself – you wanted your alarm to go off so that you could wake up because it felt too real and dreams like these often brought you utter disappointment. Jin ran his hands against your body, his cold touch leaving a tingling sensation in its wake.

You could feel your arousal dripping against your panties, the exhilaration of his mouth and hands on you leaving your mind hazed. Jin’s hand trailed under your tank top, his fingers gracing your stomach as they dragged themselves towards your breast, your small whimpers pouring into his ravenous mouth. His hand went under your bra where his fingers found your nipples, rubbing them lightly. your body leaning into his as a consequence. You both stood so close now and yet, it didn’t feel like enough.

You wanted to melt into him, wanted to feel him everywhere all at once – until you couldn't breath, until you were louder than the storm outside.

Small moans left your lips, urging him to lose all control and you could tell he was reaching his breaking point when his hips jerked forward, his erection pressing against your thigh. You leaned away from his lips, eyes meeting at the sudden action. You tugged at his drenched t-shirt and he allowed you to remove it, lifting his arms up in the air. Your eyes trailed his skin as you exposed it, inch by inch.

He was gorgeous, not a trace of imperfections on his soft pale skin – his shoulders were so broad and you pictured your legs stretched over them, giving him full access to the part that pulsed sorely in-between your thighs.

His hand reached for your hair once again, pulling your head back - his tongue traveling up the valley of your neck. your eyes fluttered shut, mouth releasing short sighs as he bit and nibbled on the tender skin. You felt like your skin was on fire, cheeks burning due to the lack of oxygen his mouth was causing. It was a  high you wanted to be in at all times.

 you had misread Jin entirely. This man was capable of destroying you, the evidence in the way your body trembled under his attention.

His hand slipped from under your shirt, finding the hem of your pajama pants and guiding his hand inside. Your mouth falling completely open once his slender fingers reach your clit, quivering in anticipation. He palmed you through your panties slowly, allowing your wetness to spread across the crutch of your panties.

“mhmm so warm” Jin groaned almost painfully.

He licked his lips as he stared into your eyes, darkness enveloping them the longer his hand remained inside of your pants, you knew you were completely fucked, he had you right where he wanted you.

 a thought arises from within the deepest part of your mind that perhaps, he was the one toying with you all this time. testing how far you would go to bring him to this point.

“Jin” you moaned “I want to uh.”

“What do you want to do?” he asked, arching his brow at your broken request.

You couldn’t concentrate but you were sure of what you wanted, of what you wanted to do to him. you reached forward, your hand finding his rock hard dick - giving it a slow pump. It quivered under your touch, urging you for more. Small groans fell out Jin’s mouth, the hand intertwined with your hair pulling back a bit harder.

Your eyes pleaded out to him -  slowly sinking on your knees. your stare never breaks with Jin. You wanted to look at him while you snatched his soul away, you had imagined this moment so many times and now that it was finally here, presented to you in a silver platter your mouth salivated. You slowly pushed down his sweats and then his boxers, his erection springing out, standing tall in front of you.

Your willing tongue unraveled from your mouth, holding his delicate length in your hand as you slid your tongue up his shaft, spreading your saliva against the pulsing vein there. Your deep breaths cascades over his tip, his cock twitching against your tongue in anticipation. Jin watched  through hooded eyes, unable to blink away from your position under him.

“Ah fuck” he groaned. 

You looked so pretty, so dirty – he could cum from the sight alone.

Your tongue glided towards his tip, your damp muscle collecting all the pre-cum that sat on his slit, the salty taste making your clit pulsate. Your tongue slipped back and forth and then you felt it, his whole body trembling at the pleasure you were drawing out with just your mouth and you let out a moan, one that you couldn’t withhold because god did he look ethereal from this angle.

You eased his head into your mouth, eyes wide open looking up at him – your cheeks hollowing as you began to slowly bob your head, allowing him to catch his breath whilst your tongue glided around his thickness. Hisses streamed out of him, the sensation of your warm mouth wrapped around him leading him to throw his head back in pleasure.

Your saliva allowed you to take in more of him – feeling his cock reach the back of your throat, tickling your tonsils. you began moving your head faster, your hand reaching to pump the length that your mouth couldn’t take, the other slipping inside of your pajamas, your fingers rubbing against your folds and dipping inside of your warm walls.

His hand reached down, gripping your hair again and you noticed it was something he liked to do but you didn’t mind – the small pang of discomfort causing moans to vibrate against his dick. Jin’s hips started to move into your willing mouth, drool dripping down your chin as you continued your quick tempo – the sound of his drenched cock dipping in and out of your mouth echoing inside of the dining area along with the sound of your gagging. 

Your eyes burned, tears brimming at the corners but you didn’t dare to look away as he looked down at you, he appeared so sexy whilst in heat, the thought that it was you doing this to him causing your fingers to move quicker inside of you, your arousal gliding down your hands. 

“Y/n” Jin moaned.

You removed your hand from his shaft and took in the rest of him, you could feel your throat begin to burn but you didn’t care – your need to have his entire length in your mouth overpowering even your need for air. Your head bobbed up and down, waiting for him to come undone in your mouth but his hand pulled back on your head, causing his cock to slide out of your mouth with a loud pop.

“That's not where I want to come,” he groaned, his chest rising and falling with each harsh breath he took. 

He glided his thumb against your pulsing red lips, collecting the drool that remained on your chin. You whimpered, your own thumb pressing against your clit - fucking yourself to the sight of him. He carried a dark ardor, a look in his eyes that you had never witnessed before or perhaps never noticed. 

In one swift movement you were off the floor, Jin placed you on the kitchen counter - his tongue once again sliding down the nape of your neck dragging out small moans from your mouth. He was experienced, his mouth and hands knowing where to touch and tug as if he had studied your entire anatomy and you let him, falling into the bliss of all your lust filled dreams. 

His mouth found yours, his lips blending against your own with rapid appetite. His hands traveled to your waist, moving his fingers in between the skin and the hem of your pants and with one pull - he brought down your pajamas and dampened panties. You yelped as the cold air hit your hot clit - begging for his touch. He pulled away from your kiss - bringing his pointer and index finger into his mouth and coating the digits with his saliva - his eyes fixed on yours. 

Your body shivered, as you watched him preparing himself to completely wreck you and not a word of objection leaves your mouth, entranced with how sexy he makes it all look. He’s a professional and you had been too cocky to ever realize that. He pressed his fingers against your throbbing pussy, your hips jerking forward at the sensation. His fingers are long and warm against your cunt and you want nothing more than to have them inside of you. 

“Shhh relax” Jin hummed, rubbing your clit in small slow circles. 

Your breath trembled, mouth falling open as he teased your needy cunt - a smirk forming on his lips. Your touch deprivation didn't go unnoticed to the man standing in front of you. Your back arching into his teasing contact. He leaned forward and left wet kisses on your chest, trails of love bites and saliva as  he reached your breast and then his fingers began to move faster - his mouth taking one of your nipples into his mouth with ease. 

“Jin” you whimpered. He was everywhere all at once and your body shook, he was too much and yet you were capable of taking it all. 

His tongue went flat against your hardened nub, gliding it up and down and then sucking on the nipple softly, your hands tangled themselves in his hair, your legs shaking as he slid one finger into your welcoming cunt and then another, and then another and soon he began pumping them quickly, holding no mercy. 

Your hips matched his tempo and your breast begin to bounce as fucked yourself into his hand. Jin pulled away from your breast - not wanting to miss how much of a slut you had become for him. Your eyes were completely shut - allowing the feeling to take over you completely and you were a wreck but you couldn’t control your hips as they rolled against his appendages. Jin groaned at the sight of you, of your Pretty cunt taking all 3 of his fingers. 

“Look at you, you love this don’t you” he muttered into your ears, his forehead pressed into your cheek as he looked down at his fingers disappearing into your cunt, glistening with your juices - leaving a small puddle on the counter. 

“Is this what you wanted?” he asked but you remained silent, whimpers replacing the answer you wanted to give. 

“Mhm?” Jin urged you, wanting to hear you beg for him. 

“Y-yes” you stuttered. 

“Look who's stuttering now” he mocked and your eyes open, gleaming with lust. 

Jin slowly retracted his fingers from where they had remained, embedded inside of you, the action making you whine in desperation which made Jin smile in response - you were needy, no longer in control and Jin felt his dick quiver at the realization. He looked deep into eyes as he stood in front of you. he raised his hand and spit into his palm proceeding to lather up your already dripping cunt. You could feel his saliva coat your clit, the feeling causing your whole body to tremble. 

He leaned back in for a kiss, slowly pressing you back into the counter until you could only see the ceiling above you. His hands slid up your thighs and with one swift movement he brought your ass to the end of the counter, your legs now placed exactly where you had wanted them to be for so long, where you thought they would look their best, thrown over his shoulders. 

“You look so good like this” he groaned, his eyes scanning your half naked body. 

You could hear the loud whistling of the tea kettle on the stove consume the entire room, creating a symphony with the moans that rattled from your lungs and then Jin sank into you, with so much ease, so smoothly that for the next few seconds you couldn't breath. 

Jin’s hands rubbed along your legs, his hips starting to roll into you with swift and disposed movements. You could feel all of him, the pulsations of his cock as he slowly retracted and then easily slipped back inside. The way the tip of his cock reached your ovaries, your legs quivering out of reflex. 

“Jin” you cried out and you lost it, eyes rolling to the back of your head as he snapped his waist, pounding into you with so much speed that the counter underneath you began to shake, Jin’s hand flied to your tank top, gripping it in his hand -  pulling at the fabric with each thrust that he gave you. 

“Is this what you wanted me to do all this time?” he questioned, bringing his thumb against your clit. 

“Y-yes” you yelped. 

“Fuck Y/n” he moaned breathlessly and the thunder outside was no match for the sound of your greedy wet cunt taking his entire length, your loud yelps and moans masking the natural disaster taking place. 

Your ass bounced against his thighs each time he slammed into you and he was frantic, your warm walls smothering his aching cock as he plunged into you with so much need and desire you could feel your clit swell around him. As you peered down at him there wasn’t a trace left of the shy boy you once knew. His eyes darkened, glazed over as he stared at his dick stretching out your walls. His teeth biting down onto his lip harshly in a foolish attempt to refrain from the grunts that vibrated from his chest. 

His fingers rubbed quickly over your flustered clit, it was as if he already knew what you needed before you said it, he had you down to a science and you couldn’t stop your body from convulsing, your cunt squeezing around him as a signal of your incoming orgasm. 

“Jin i’m gonna-” you yelp out, this orgasm was different from the ones you would give yourself to the thought of him, pressure beginning to form dangerously in your core. 

“Shhhh i know princess relax” he hummed like an expert only would. 

Your legs fell from his shoulders and his hands received them quickly, holding them wide open. The view of your pussy taking him to the hilt  urging him to flutter in pleasure but he didn’t want to look away - he didn’t want to miss a beat, not when it had been everything he’s dreamed of and more. 

You looked so perfect, felt so perfect and whilst he fought the utter pleasure surging through him, that left him completely spent he could feel your cunt constricting around his cock, his hips faltering at the sudden tightness that enveloped him. 

“Ahh ahh” Jin yelped. 

 With loud moans you came undone, your body tensing and muscle restricting - eyes brimming with tears and just as fast, you felt every cell inside of you ease, like a shot of anesthesia, body and mind going completely blank. Moments later Jin shoots streams of his warm nectar into your walls, filling up every ridge, his milk oozing out as he retracts his hips slowly, careful as to not disturb your high. 

By the time the morning crept into the city of Yeosu, the storm had subsided - superseded by the bright sun that now shined directly in your face. You concluded that the sky had made it its goal to not allow you peaceful slumber these past few days. Denying you the pleasures of rest. You had been awake for a few minutes now but you had been reluctant to open your eyes, focusing on the feeling of the soft comforter wrapped around your nude body. 

Perhaps you were just really tired but the truth was that you just didn’t want to recognize the body that laid next to you, soft snores flowing past their lips, their face nestled into the crook of your neck. 

If you opened your eyes then it would all come to an end, the feeling of his arm wrapped around your waist, the feeling of his weight besides you. Yet, you knew it couldn't last forever and although neither of you had shared any words regarding the events that took place last evening, or the other things that happened after that, you concluded it would all end the same way it usually did. 

You weren’t unfamiliar to awkward goodbyes when the sexual tension dissipated and though inside you wanted to hold onto the hope that maybe this time it would be different, that Jin wasn't like that - you were aware of the inevitable. 

Your eyes blinked open with a soft hiss and for a moment you were blinded by a ray of sunshine gleaming on your face - you raised one of your arms, blocking away the light and carefully turned to glance over at the sleeping man beside you. Jin was sound asleep and you could tell how completely at ease he was in contrast to your nerves that rattled you out of your very needed and desired slumber. 

You didn’t want to leave, didn’t want him to wake up to an empty bed but you knew it would only be harder if you were to leave whilst he was awake, you knew he would attempt to sooth the rejection that was approaching. 

You carefully lifted his arm from around your waist, sliding inch by inch out of the comforter you both shared. Your eyes remained on his resting form, his lips slightly parted and his disheveled silky black locks sprawled on the pillow underneath his head - he looked angelic and your heart lurched at the sight. 

You contemplated if you should’ve stayed, if you could allow yourself a bit of cruelty in exchange for comfort but you had been down that road many times before and at last you made up your mind. Your eyes moved to scan the floor, trying to find the article of clothing you wore the day before but they are nowhere to be found. 

“Shit” you whispered. 

Scenes of the previous day flashed through your mind like a silent film, replaying the lust filled moments you both shared - your bodies intertwining in nearly every room of the vacant home until you found shelter under his bed sheets. His moans and whimpers forever embedded into your memory causing your legs to quiver as you stood disoriented in his room. 

You had left your clothing sprawled in different corners of the house - evidence left for your colleagues to find upon their arrival. 

Jin’s body twists and turns and grumbles fall from his lips, shifting you into overdrive. your hands quickly picked up one of his t-shirts that had been thrown across the floor. You slipped the fabric over your head - being suddenly hit with his scent, guilty adrenaline soaring through you. 

You slowly moved towards the door, your steps careful and calculated as you attempted to escape the room like a foolish thief. Your hands reached for the doorknob, wincing as the door creaked under your touch, cursing at the old house for exposing you in such a dire situation. 

“I thought i had at least 5 more minutes” Jin’s raspy voice echoed inside of the silence you so badly tried to keep. 

Your body froze - heart thumping inside of your chest at a faster rate than before. You shut your eyes as a grimace took over your expression - you had been caught, red handed. You tried to come up with an excuse, in order to lessen the blow but nothing came to mind and as you turned you gave him the words you had heard oh so many times before. 

“Sorry, i didn't want to wake you” the words left a pungent aftertaste in your mouth as you spoke them. 

Jin was sitting amongst the mess of comforter and sheets you both had made, his bare chest gleaming with the light that ripped through the windows - his hand reaching to rub his puffy eyes, a long exhausted sigh leaving his lips. 

“It's too early for you to lie and honestly, I'm too tired to believe it.”

You blinked quickly, his statement throwing you off balance. His tone did not hold any anger or frustration - he sounded disappointed. He was a reflection of you this time and now you were the one having to seek for poor excuses regarding your sudden departure. 

“Jin I-” you tried to speak but your words were cut off by silence, a boulder sitting comfortably against your throat. 

Jin shifted from his sitting position - his eyes focused on your messy hair and on his favorite t-shirt that hung loosely around your frame. 

“You are always close but yet, so out of reach Y/n” Jin states “as open as you appear to be you hold your doors so tightly that your hands grow blisters.” he didn’t intend to be harsh - in fact his words are only a demonstration of how deeply he had come to know you but you couldn’t control the bitter sensation they left inside of you. 

“I didn't mean to- '' you began but couldn’t finish, swallowing down your justifications. 

“I can predict the weather for the next 2 weeks but not what you will do next” he chuckled and your lips quivered at the reality of what he was saying, of the truths that he knew and threw at you without hesitation. 

“I just don't want to mess things up - not this time around Jin, not with you” your mouth grew dry, your eyes glistening with tears that you didn’t want to let out. 

“That’s not a decision you can make on your own,” Jin retorted. 

“Jin, i've been here before so many times - i don't want it to be you running out of my life this time, the thought alone is unbearable and i know we don't know each other like that but i don't want to put you in an uncomfortable situation, you are a really nice guy” you don’t breath between your words, your lungs constricting as you give him your reasons in fear that he won't understand. 

“Well I'm not the one sneaking out of the room, am i?” 

Jin’s stare was sharp and you fidgeted under it - your mind attempting to find other logical reasons why whatever it is you both shared ultimately would come crashing down in the most vile kind of way. 

“What if you grow tired of me?” you whispered, eyes looking away from his. 

“I like coffee” he jokes and this time you smile. 

“I'm being serious!” you whine, your brows knitting with the conflicting debate that expands in your head. 

“Y/n, i am a grown man” Jin smirks “and not the kind that plays silly little games.”

Your eyes snap in his direction - a pang of guilt shooting through you. 

“Yeah i’m sorry about that too” you mutter, your cheeks growing flushed in embarrassment. 

“Are you?” Jin raises his eyebrow, a small smile appearing on his cheeks.

“Stop apologizing and come here.”

It doesn't take a second longer before you swiftly remove his t-shirt from your body - making a mental note to remind him that it belongs to you now. the insignificant object becoming one of the first things he will let you keep without hesitation because this man, the one who you decorate with kisses - the one that has entered your atmosphere at high speeds and at an unknown trajectory will never be like the others.

© 𝐂𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞, 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝.

[mxtxfanatic]

It’s probably another thing in the foil relationship between Wei Wuxian and Jin Guangyao that we are given so many moments where Wei Wuxian just casually hangs out with (dead) sex workers and treats them so well that they are protective of him, while Jin Guangyao is responsible for two separate massacres of sex workers in order to bury any lingering ties to them from his childhood.

[back2bluesidex]

Meanie - KSJ (18+)

Pairing: Mean Boss! Seokjin X Fem employee! Reader

Theme: PWP, smut

Wordcount: 900+

Summary: Kim Seokjin is mean and incredibly hot.

Warnings: Blow job, oral, mean boss, not so appropriate sex, things are fully consented between them. NSFW!!

Minors are not allowed in this blog!!

A/N: here is the mean Jin I wanted to write since the moment these photos dropped <3

Masterlist | Patreon

Two rough fingers land on your jaw, tightening around the angle harshly making your eyes tear up even more. 

“That’s all?” he asks, gritting his perfect set of teeth, “that’s all your smart mouth can do? Can’t even deep throat me? You whore!” 

If it was another time - if it was not this situation - as in you on your knees, sucking Kim Seokjin off, then he would have to pay for this degradation. 

You would have filed a defamation case for calling you derogatory names and would make sure that he sees the face of prison even if it’s only for a day. 

But the situation you are currently in… is kind of compromising. 

You had come to his cabin, slammed your resignation on his dark wood table, called him a selfish prick who wants nothing more than money and money. You threatened him that you would post about the company’s toxic work atmosphere in Linkedin and would give a one star review in Glassdoor but things turned around very quickly. 

Things accelerated from one argument to another (it’s only you who argued, he only replied calmly yet sharply), and now you are on your knees, mouth stuffed with his rock hard cock that you can’t even put in your mouth properly. 

You are but a woman and Kim Seokjin is way too handsome and tempting to turn down. 

He grabs the back of your neck and pushes your mouth more on his shaft. Your drool rolls down the back of his cock and your chin then drops on your shirt making it look darker than the original color. 

“Take me properly, Y/N!” Seokjin groans. 

It’s not your fault that you can’t take him. You are not inexperienced by any means but he is just so fucking big. 

You reel back to the time when you laughed at your co-worker for spreading the “Kim Seokjin has a giant dick” rumor. You thought he would be just average.

But oh boy! Were you wrong! 

Tears prickle at the corner of your eyes as you try to take him full. The tip nudges at the back of your throat and makes you gag instantly. 

Seokjin thrusts up and things become ten times harder. 

But who are you to complain? Especially because your panties are ruined already and you can only think of how good his cock would feel inside you. If you complain now, it will make you nothing but a hypocrite. 

You start bobbing your head matching the rhythm of your predator’s thrusts. Your free hand comes up to fondle his balls. 

Seokjin moans. And you feel a weird and useless sense of pride. 

Turning your bobs faster, you start sucking on him hard. You can feel him twitching inside the walls of your mouth. 

His breaths soon turn heavy, short-lived and ragged. 

You are not doing much better. 

It’s embarrassing to say but you feel the familiar coil in your abdomen regardless of not being touched. 

You rock your hips seeking for the tiny bit of friction that your own legs can provide you. 

But that catches Seokjin’s eyes. 

“Rutting against nothing huh? Such a desperate slut!” he degrades you more with a lopsided smile playing on his beautiful face. 

You don’t reply - of course he is right. 

He slams his pelvis on your face. Your nose collides with his pubic hair, making the intensity of your arousal wilder. 

Seokjin moans prettily again as his hip shudders and he cums inside your mouth. His hand on the back of your neck goes tiger, “swallow it!” he commands. 

You comply. You try to swallow his disposal without wasting a drop. And while doing so, you cum undone wetting your leggings. 

When he is satisfied with your act, he pulls himself out from your mouth. His cock is glistening with his arousal and your spit. 

The mixture of the same runs down your chin making you look even messier. 

“Get up.” he orders again. You do so without voicing any protest.  

“Oh ho!” his eyes are fixed on the apparent wet spot on your leggings, “you came in your pants? So pathetic of you,Y/N.” 

Now that you are coming down from your high, shame washes over you. 

You were here to resign from the job after he canceled your vacation application but you ended up doing things you never thought you would. 

“I will take my leave” you reply with downcast eyes, turning your heels already to pick up your bag and leave. 

“Did I say you can leave?” he stands up from his over-expensive chair. Walking towards where you are standing, he closes the gap between your bodies. 

“I just resig-”

“I don’t accept it.” he tugs a loose strand of hair behind your ears. 

“I am kind of mean, you see. I strive to keep the things that I like to myself and myself only.” he continues and gives you a sickeningly sweet smile. 

“Now come, let me fuck the brat out of you. So that you have more spice to add to that glassdoor review when I piss you off next time.” his finger traces the path of your shirt and lands on your chest. He circles his digit around your clothed nipple. You feel your arousal rushing back to you. 

Now if Kim Seokjin wants to fuck you, who are you to reject? But you are not as docile as he thinks you are. 

“Only if you accept the vacation application, Sir.”

Permanent Taglist:

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[bloomeng]

One thing I will never understand is why most mdzs fans are so pressed about Jin Guangyao. I understand disliking him if you’re a huge fan of the canon characters he’s hurt, but so many of the people who hate him are only here for wangxian. And like wtf did he do to wangxian? To me, his biggest offense is killing Nie Mingjue who was literally already dying. But if you see any discussion online from people who don’t like him it’s only about how he married his sister. And it drives me insane.

Lemme spell it out (I say arguing with the wall)

1) When he is introduced to Qin Su he has no idea and accepts the engagement because it's expected of him to marry.

2) His father is a horrible abusive man.

3) Jin Guangyao sleeps with her once for the sake of propriety before he knows.

4) He finds out right before the wedding meaning that calling it off would be suspicious.

5) If he called out his father the best that would happen is him getting thrown out and losing everything he’s worked towards and the worst is his father killing him and Qin Su and even maybe her mother.

6) He never touches her again.

Whether MXTX meant it or not Meng Yao’s struggle is a foil to Wei Wuxian’s. This idea of severe classism controlling who gets to survive and prosper in this world is integral to the story. Wei Wuxian is lucky because he happened to be brought into a sect due to connections he had before his birth. Meng Yao isn’t so lucky. His mother being a sex worker is crucial to his whole story. Because of his mother Meng Yao suffers from this anti-sexwork rhetoric and I don’t say this lightly but a lot of his struggles in life are rooted in the misogyny towards his mother. So when people pick on him for marrying his sister— something he was forced into— and mock him for it… it feels tone-deaf. It’s similar to the way real-life misogyny effects the way people hate Madame Yu, but that’s a whole other can of worms.

To be clear it is not misogynistic to dislike Jin Guangyao that would be a crazy thing to say. It’s the way people go about it. When factors of his birth, his mother, and classism, in general, get mixed in, is when the conversation goes sour.

Jin Guangyao’s actions are not excused because his life was hard but neither are Wei Wuxian’s. People get so wrapped up in the POV of the novel they forget it’s biased. If the story were from Jin Guangyao’s POV I bet people would not loathe him to this extent. Which is so frustrating. Blah Blah Blah reading comprehension buzzword.

[jisunghannie]

Save Me Now

PAIRING: Hyunjin x fem!reader

WARNINGS: Hyunjin being “toxic”, sweet apologies, pet names, unprotected sex, mentions of cheating Hyunjin, Felix is your cousin!, confessions

SUMMARY: Your boyfriend of 1 and a half years has been acting differently lately and you aren't sure why. But you know it's definitely due to a weird reason. When you found what it was, you were heartbroken only for him to pick back up the pieces. Or does he?

WORD COUNT: 3,087

A/N:

Gahh, sorry this took so long!! I was on the heaviest writer's block along with getting sick back to back. Hopefully, this will make up for it!

This is not proofread! You can get sneak peeks of that piece and other pieces of my works on @mr-hanjisung ! Also, apologies if there are grammar mistakes or anything, I hope you guys enjoy this piece!

“Did you ever get the girl who owed you debt?” You asked as he shook his head. “Funny story, Chan covered her expenses because that's his new fiancée.” He said as you laughed. “Imagine having your client as your boss's wife. That's actually so funny.” You laughed as Hyunjin nodded. “So funny indeed.” He said sarcastically as you kissed his cheek.

“I'm gonna go see if anyone else needs help, okay Jin?” You said as he just nodded. “Okay, love you.” You told him, giggling. “Me too.” He said, waving his hand to you as you left.

You felt, awkward. You and Hyunjin had been dating for 1 and a half years already. Yet he still couldn't bring himself to say, ‘I love you’ back. You didn't feel hurt by it, just wishing that he would return the words.

As you left for your work which was more “civilized”. He continued doing his own thing. You were working as your best friend walked in and gave you a big squeeze. She knew about Hyunjin, well, she knew about your boyfriend, but you never told her his name or what he did. That’s why she is skeptical but she trusts you.

“So when can I meet your mystery man?” She asked as you laughed. “We’ve been dating for a year and a half already, you know?” You reminded her as she pouted, “Exactly, a year and half and I’ve never even met the guy. I hardly know anything about him.” She said as she then gave you a serious look. “Have you guys even said the, you know, the L word?” She asked as you shook your head. “I have but him, not yet, but then again I’m his first girlfriend.” You told her as your best friend frowned. “He’s your first boyfriend too, don't forget.” She reminded you as you nodded. “I know don’t worry.” You told her as a couple came in and you served them.

You were a server and or waitress at a famous restaurant. Unfortunately, you then saw that, that couple was none other than your boyfriend and another woman.

You frowned but shook your head then immediately smiled. “Hi, welcome in. My name is y/n and I’ll be your server today.” You told them, giving your boyfriend a dirty look as he blew you a kiss. The woman he was with smacked his arm as he jerked lightly. “Yes, we'll take a table for two.” She said, her voice delicate and sweet. You nodded and led them to a table as you handed them menus. “Let me know what I can get you and call me over when you are ready.” You said as he chuckled.

You walked back as you didn't understand what was going on. You were so gonna-

“-kill him! I'm gonna kill him when we get home!” You shouted in the worker's lounge with your best friend as you sat on the couch, huffing and puffing. You were angry, which was normal. Your friend, Lily, walked over and patted you on the back. “There, there, it's okay.” She told you, “He's nothing but a lying cheat. I knew he was no good.” She said, sounding like your mother. “What's his name?” She asked as you shook your head, “It doesn't matter.” You told her as she insisted. “Are you gonna break up with him?” She asked, but before you could answer, she bombarded you with questions.

“Where are you gonna live?”

“I-”

“Are you still going to be able to work here?”

“Lily-”

“What does he do for a living?”

“Lily I-”

“How are you going to break up with him? Maybe-”

“Yang Dahee!” You shouted.

That shut her up. She knows you only use her Korean name when you are really upset. “Yes, I'm listening eomma.” She teased. “I'll deal with it.” You replied as she nodded. “If you guys end up breaking up and need somewhere to stay, call me.” She said as you nodded, walking back out to serve Hyunjin and the mysterious lady.

“Are you ready to order?” You asked as the lady giggled and looked at Hyunjin as he looked up to meet your eyes. “I'll take my usual.” He said as you gave him a fake smile as you looked at his mistress. “And for the lady?” You asked as she looked up at you, “I'll have what he's having.” She replied as you nodded and walked off, your smile faltering.

Something she didn't know was that you made his usual so if she made it to perfection and handed it to them she would've lost. But she knew better to deny service to an innocent woman when it was Hyunjin at fault. As you went into the break room, you were on your phone as you got a text from Hyunjin.

Jinnie <3: Are you jealous?

y/nnie: Of course I am!

Jinnie <3: Sorry, I had no choice. I'm marrying her due to business contracts.

y/nnie: What about me?

Jinnie <3: You are and always will be my girlfriend. My lover. My number 1.

y/nnie: Then why are you marrying her?

Jinnie <3: I'll explain when we both are home okay?

y/nnie: Why not now Hyunjin?

You were crying now for sure. Tears ran down your face as you waited for his response.

Once you finished his meal, you opened your phone.

Jinnie <3: Because it's better to talk in person about this.

You left him on seen as you wiped your face and walked out to face him. “Here are your meals.” You said as he ate and fed the woman. She got all the treatment you wanted. It wasn't fair.

“I'm sorry, I need some fresh air.” The woman said as she walked outside as he motioned for you to sit but you turned your heel to walk away as he grabbed your wrist. “Why are you running away? Aren't you gonna fight for your spot?” He asked as you flicked his arm away. “Go be happy with your fiancée. I'll get my things tonight.” You told him as he gripped your wrist tighter. “I have an event I need you to attend. Once you're there you'll understand why I have to marry her. Understood?” He said, his voice laced with danger as you nodded silently. He then kissed your cheek. “Good girl.” He said as he released you.

You walked away from him, rubbing your wrist. You sighed and wondered how you even ended up liking him. But you couldn't help the fact that you would meet him one way or another. You were Felix's cousin after all. Once Felix owed debt, Han kidnapped you all for his induction. Once he succeeded you were taken to convince Felix to join. Now it made sense why he was able to buy you such an expensive gift for your birthday.

In exchange for your life being spared, Felix had to work for them. He regretted what he did but he told you that he’d be lying if he told you that he didn't enjoy doing what he does.

After your shift, Hyunjin texted you to go home and wear the dress, bag, and heels he had bought you. You frowned, still mad at him of course. You then took a deep breath in and out as you got dressed. As you did your hair and makeup. The minute you finished, Hyunjin knocked against the door frame. You glared at him as he walked over to you.

“I knew that dress would look good on you.” He said as you sighed. “Hurry up, let's go.” You said as you walked right past him, to the car. You sat next to your cousin as he chuckled. “Let me guess. Hyunjin pissed you off.” Felix assumed as you laughed, smacking his shoulder lightly. “Is it that obvious?” You asked as Felix nodded. You then laughed as you wiped the tears from your eyes. “Good. Let him know.” You said as Felix leaned in to your ear. “To be honest, I don't think you're gonna like the event we are going to.” He whispered as he continued, “It's literally Hyunjin's engagement party.” Felix finished as he pulled away.

You looked horrified as Hyunjin saw your face across from the limo. He immediately texted you.

Jinnie <3: You okay?

y/nnie: I'm fine

Jinnie <3: Are you sure? You look like Felix just told you that someone died

y/nnie: I said I'm fine Jin.

Jinnie <3: If you say you are then I believe you

y/nnie: Thank you

But it was still eating you up inside. You didn't understand why it was but when you guys walked in, Hyunjin walked over to the mysterious woman who was at the cafe with him. He then linked arms with her as they walked in. You took a deep breath and exhaled trying to calm yourself.

Felix knew what was wrong as he massaged your shoulder lightly. “I know it hurts but you should've known. He's rich behind his loan sharks business. He's only doing this so we have more connections through his family though. Once he inherits everything he'll divorce her.” Felix whispered as you wiped your teary eyes. “What if she gets pregnant by then…” You said, really thinking the worst as Felix sighed. “If you really do love him and trust him, you would believe in him.” He said as you nodded.

As you guys went through the night, you saw him feeding her and holding her dress from dragging, he was holding her close and whispering sweet nothings in her ears. Then, he kissed her. You couldn't believe your eyes. You couldn't take it anymore so you left. You just walked out of the estate and went back to your shared home with Hyunjin. You then cried on the couch.

After an hour, Hyunjin came home, his lips smeared in lipstick. You scoffed as you packed your things. He ran over to you and grabbed your wrist. “What the hell are you doing!?” He said, his voice raised. “I can't handle this Hyunjin! I can't see you with another woman even if it's not real love!” You shouted as you tried to resist, his face furrowed. “Just stop and listen to me!” He said as you stopped resisting. “You have 3 minutes.” You said blatantly as you both sat. “Listen, I know it hurts to see but I assure you that I only have space for you in my heart and nobody else.” He said as you scoffed. “Don't give me that bullshit.” You said as he stuttered, trying to find the right words. “Exactly.” You said.

You then took off your heels and grabbed your bag that he had bought for you and threw them at him. “Keep your stupid heels and bag for your fiancée. I don't need your stupid gifts.” You told him as he smirked, “That dress is a gift of mine as well.” He said, stepping closer to you. You didn't know how to respond, but before you could turn around he snaked his arms around your waist. “So take it off.” He said bluntly as your face was now flushed. “Go ahead…” He whispered in your ear. “Strip it off…” He whispered as you bit your lip.

You knew that you shouldn't give in. But with Hyunjin saying that, you felt weak to your knees. You didn't know what to think. “Jin… I-” He stopped you and hushed you as he tugged on the string of your dress lightly. “Take it off or I will for you.” He huskily said. You don't know what happened or how it even got to this point but he was on top of you, his collar shirt unbuttoned and his tie on the floor now. Your dress was completely off. Let's just say, at least now you knew his goal wasn't to get back the dress.

“You must seduce all your women with your words…” You whispered quietly as his lips barely grazed yours. His lips now smeared in your lipstick. “Don't give me that. You know you love me.” He whispered as he pulled you in for another kiss. You waited for this moment for a while. Sure, you guys had showered together before but nothing to this extent. “Hwang Hyunjin.” You spat at him as he sighed. “I'm sorry for hurting you… really… but I promise nothing will change my feelings for you… I love you and only you. That I can promise you.” He said.

Wait, were you hearing things… “What did you say Jin?” You asked. “That I can promise you?” He answered.

“No, before that…”

“Nothing can change my feelings for you?”

“No after that.”

“That I can promise you?”

“No!”

He then chuckled lightly as he kissed you again. “I love you and only you.” He repeated as you gave him a happy gentle smile, tears rolling down your cheeks. “Hey, are you okay?” He asked, wiping your tears. “I'm just really happy… I've waited so long to hear you say those words…” You said as he kissed your cheek chuckling. “I'll say it as many times as you want as long as you stay with me.” He said as you nodded, pulling him closer to you, your bodies touching, skin to skin. His breath hitched as he composed himself. “Where were we?” He asked, running his hands through his hair. You bashfully smiled as you covered yourself lightly with your hands.

He then smirked as he ran his fingers against your inner thighs. “So you've been waiting for this or I assume?” He asked as you nodded. “How cute…” He said as he kissed your inner thighs. “I'll leave my mark on you good.” He said as you stayed silent. He then moved your hand, covering your breasts. “I've seen your whole body baby… no need to hide it anymore.” He whispered against your inner thigh. “I know you get off to me seeing you naked.” He said as he chuckled.

“No I don't…” You replied, squeezing his shoulders as he kissed your clit gently. “It’s okay baby… you are so cute when you squeeze me like that…” He said as he hovered over you. “You seem wet enough.” He said rubbing his fingertips against your wet folds. You then looked away, feeling embarrassed. He then kissed and bit at your earlobe gently. “Can I put it in… please..?” He pleaded in your ear. His voice husky and low but whiny as you gave in and nodded gently. You could feel him smile against your ear.

You then felt his cock smack against your stomach. You then looked down and blushed, realizing just how big he really was. “Will it even fit?” You asked as Hyunjin shrugged. “I guess we’ll find out.” He said as he aligned himself against you. Your breath hitched as you felt the tip hit your entrance. “Make sure to loosen up.” He told you, he then placed your hands on his shoulders as he looked at you reassuringly. “You ready?” He asked as you nodded. He then pushed himself inside as you just gasped, not knowing what to really say.

“You're so tight…” Hyunjin said as you dug your nails into his shoulders. “Jin…” You squirmed out as he gave a gasp. “Don't clamp…” He said, massaging small circles on your stomach. “You're doing so good…” He whispered as his long hair covered half of his face. You pushed the hair out of his face as you nodded. “I'm ready…” You whispered back as he kissed your forehead, beginning to move slowly.

“Jinnie…” You moaned out as he held onto your hips. “Shh… I know… you're doing so good…” He hushed as you kept moaning. He then began to speed up as you looked down to see how it looked. God, you didn't realize that you had been holding back on such a good feeling. “Hey, my eyes are up here.” He said squeezing your hips, causing you to look up. “There are your pretty eyes, enjoying the… hah… view..?” He groaned out as you nodded. “You're lucky that I gave you that dress… but I knew you looked better without it…” He said as you nodded.

After a while he then shifted and did deep and slow thrusts. “Jinnie…” You moaned out. With how slow he went, you felt every little part of his cock inside you. You felt how big he was and how he reached in every-

“Right there..!” You moaned out grabbing the sheets as he smirked. “What's right there hmm?” He teased. “Jinnie… stop being mean…” You whined as he chuckled. “Honest, honest, what do you need there..?” He asked, still obviously teasing. “It feels good…” You told him as he smirked. “What feels good?” He teased, still hitting your g-spot. “The way you hit that spot…” You whined as he traced his fingers on your stomach still slowly moving inside. “What spot?” He asked, feigning innocence. You whined as he just laughed at you. “Fine, how do you want it baby?” He asked as you pulled him close. “I don't care, just hurry up…” You said as he smirked, ramming into you at such speed.

“My abilities as a dancer help a lot, you know…” He groaned out. He then felt you tighten up around him as you moaned out in ecstasy that he had to kiss you to quiet you down. “Shh…” He hushed as you giggled. “God, you're cock drunk.” He said as you nodded, tracing your fingers on his chest. He chuckled as he pulled out and came on your stomach. “I swear. You are crazy for that being your first time.” He said as you nodded. “It's not that impressive.” You replied as he ruffled your hair and you pushed him. He got back up and took you to the bathroom. “Let's wash up and go to sleep.” He said as you nodded.

After a long bath together, you guys got ready for bed. “Oh please, you almost fell asleep because I was massaging the shampoo in your hair so good.” You said as he continued to deny it. “No, you were so embarrassed because I had to clean you up because you were too tired.” He said as you gasped, faking hurt feelings as he laughed and shoved you lightly. “I love you.” He said as you smiled, “I love you too.”

Taglist:

@annybah @softkisshyunjin @queenmea604 @hyunmikim @stayceebs97 @boi-bi-ahaha @lilinaskzz @cookiesandcreammy

[persphonesorchid]

Tasting Jealousy - KSJ

Summary: Seokjin is more than happy to accompany you to your company's New Year's Eve party, he's not happy however, that your co-worker is trying to flirt with you. The presence of this man brings up feelings Seokjin thought he left behind him.

Word Count: 3.2k

Genre: COH!au, Cupid!Seokjin x F!Reader, fluff, smut...angst 😀

Warnings: Jealous jinnie, smut (Protected sex bcus Seokjin ain't looking to be a daddy for the new year. Soft Dom jinnie, fingering, kitty spanking - you'll see what I mean lmao.) Jin gets very sad at one point and it gave me flashbacks of a universe in which he left 🤡

Masterlist - HERE

Notes: Happy New year my darlings!! I hope this year brings you lots of joy, love and peace!! Be good to yourselves!!

Now, I love this couple so much and I just can't get away from them ajsjhsha so here you go, my last fic for the year! And guess what? You guys will finally get to know who sent MC the flower arrangements. I know a lot of you were wondering lmao. I hope to write more drabbles for these two...even though is can't be considered a drabble because it got way out of hand 😭 but! I'm not complaining! I hope you guys enjoy!!

this follows Cupid's on Holiday's What If drabble Picking Peonies

“Ranunculus.” The word is a hissed breath between Seokjin’s teeth, eyes narrowing into slits. There’s a muscle twitching just under his eye, and he should be careful. If he grips the champagne flute any tighter the fine glass will shatter.

You pause in the middle of your sentence, fingers brushing his as you take the glass he offers, head turning and tilting back a little to look up at him.

The chatter of the party populous and the soft crackle of Christmas jingles fades into background noise against the rising ring in his ears.

The man who stands across from you both must’ve been raised without manners, that or at least a little common sense. He stands tall, a inch or so shorter than Seokjin if he were to guess. They’re unintentionally matching, both wearing black turtleneck sweaters. Though, Seokjin’s coat is tweed and brushes his knees, the man’s is dark grey and stops where his hands are tucked into the pockets of his black slacks.

Its been about a minute since Seokjin went off to get you both something to drink. A minute since he spotted this man through the crowd and just knew.

It’s been about a minute since he’s walked over here, weaved his way through the crowd with a wide boxy smile and a wave in your direction. A minute of his eyes trailing over your form, lingering over the way the peach fabric accentuates your waist and flutters at your feet in soft waves. A minute since he’d leaned in with a smile and kissed both your cheeks.

A minute of him pretending Seokjin isn’t standing right here, like your arm isn’t linked with his.

Six minutes. Not like Seokjin is counting or anything.

Something burns hot in the back of Seokjin’s mind when you giggle around the syllables that make up this man’s name. You’re smiling at something he said a second ago, but Seokjin is so far in his head he didn’t hear. It’s the kind of smile you give him when he brings you your favourite treat; your cheeks puffing up and squishing your eyes. He doesn’t know if the guy’s actually funny or if you’re only smiling at him to not seem rude.

“This is Seokjin.” You say, and briefly, you look up at him, smile unmoving. There’s a pinch to your brow, probably still wondering what the meaning behind his word earlier was. A bit of pride blooms in his chest with the way you wonder; you’ve long forgotten where his distaste stems.

Seokjin dips his head in greeting when, the man – Taehyung – finally looks over at him. He extends a hand, overhead lights of the venue catching on the face of his watch that Seokjin knows is expensive. He knows because it matches his.

Seokjin shakes his hand firmly, even as Taehyung’s eyes meet yours again with a smile that seems a little more strained and a lot less boxy.

“Strong grip you’ve got there.” Taehyung's chuckle is deep as his hand falls back to his side and Seokjin only hums. “Friend of yours?”

There’s nothing in his tone that gives reason for the feeling that floods Seokjin’s chest. It rises quickly from his feet and burns the back of his neck and ears and he bristles.

“Partner, actually.” There’s an edge to his voice that he knows you’ve caught; you squeeze his arm a little.

“Ah, partner... That’s nice, I didn’t know you were seeing anyone.”

There’s no way he couldn’t have known.

He’s not in your department, Seokjin knows. This encounter would’ve happened a whole lot sooner had he been. Seokjin had been about your work place many times over this year alone, sometimes for no particular reason. Everyone in your department knows him by now.

Office gossip spreads like a flame in a dry grass field, so it isn’t that he hadn’t known, the man just chose to blatantly ignore it.

Something about that sets Seokjin’s teeth on edge.

“Ah, well, I’m pretty private so that’s fine.” You wave your other hand, the motion careful as not to spill the champagne that sits in it.

You and Taehyung make small talk, and Seokjin drowns in the feeling that’s swimming around his head. You ask him about how his birthday went and Taehyung says it could’ve been better. And there’s a twinkle in his eyes that Seokjin doesn’t like when he says it.

Taehyung smiles, after a while of Seokjin just staring him down. “Well...all my best for the new year.” He says, the curls of his dark hair sways on his forehead when he looks to Seokjin again. “Nice meeting you.”

And like that, he was gone, back through the crowd to linger when he’d came from.

Seokjin feels you shift, and when he looks at you, you’re already watching him.

“What was that about?” you ask, a brow raised.

“What?” Seokjin raises a brow back and you sigh, tapping at his arm with hand that was looped around it.

“Jin...” You say nothing more and Seokjin busies himself with draining the rest of the champagne in his glass. He sets it down on a nearby table and you do the same, unlinking your arm from his to stand in front of him.

“Do you want to leave?” you ask softly.

“We’ve only been here two hours.” Seokjin replies, shaking his head.

“You didn’t answer my question. And besides it wouldn’t be any fun if you’re gonna be like...that for the rest of the night.”

“I’m not being like anything.” His voice is a little harsh, and Seokjin isn’t sure if it’s because he’s being called out. He sighs, brows pinching. “It’s fine. It wouldn’t be fair to you if we leave now.”

“I don’t mind, that’s why I asked. If you don’t want to stay that’s okay.”

“Why’re you so stubborn? Stop pushing it.”

You step away from him, eyes rolling as you step past.

“Where are you going?” Seokjin calls, turning as you walk, following the motion of your body with his.

“The bathroom.” You snap and Seokjin stares until you disappear into the throng of people.

There’s a low whistle behind him and Seokjin slowly turns, hackles raised again.

Taehyung is back. Barely seems to be paying him mind as he fills a plate with finger food and snacks. The long rectangular table is tucked into a corner, laden with different types of foods. He’s a bit away, but Seokjin’s certain he heard the exchange if the little smile he donned was anything to go by.

“Trouble in paradise?” He nods with his chin in the direction you stomped off to, picking a mini sandwich off his plate.

“Just a small fire. Containable. Although, I don’t see how that’s any business of yours.” If Seokjin’s eyes could narrow any further, he’d close them.

Taehyung lifts his shoulder in a shrug, “Just worrying, she’s my friend after all. Would hate to see her not have a good time.”

“Right.” Seokjin says, and then takes a breath. He doesn’t have to entertain this. He turns on his heel, walking through the crowd towards the bathrooms.

He finds you just coming out, pulling the lace of your sleeves back down to your wrists. He takes your hand, “We’re leaving.”

“Okay.”

You follow without complaint or question. Once outside, Seokjin gives you his coat because he doesn’t need it, a hand on the small of your back as he leads you to where he parked. Ever the gentleman, he opens the door for you and waits until you’re situated before going around and getting in.

He turns the heat on, and the drive is silent.

After a moment of your eyes burning into the side of his head, you finally speak: “Are you okay?”

“M’fine.” Seokjin tries to keep the edge out his tone because there’s no reason to snap at you.

You still catch it, and Seokjin sighs when you go quiet. His teeth aches when he clenches his jaw, grip tight on the steering wheel. It wasn’t long before he’s pulling into the parking lot of the apartment and you’re out the car first.

The way up to your apartment is silent, and it continues until you’re both inside, taking your shoes off at the door.

“Wanna tell me what’s wrong now?”

Seokjin feels guilt knot his stomach as you stare at him, a patient look on your face.

“I’m sorry. It’s just...”

There was still a lot of things Seokjin was getting used to. It’s been a year since he decided to break every rule set for him and stay with you. There are times when he’s blissfully unaware of it. When he’s tucked it into the far reaches of his mind in a box under lock and key and it doesn’t bother him. Sometimes though, like now, it rattles along the inside of his head, bouncing off corners.

Taehyung is the one who sent you that horrid floral arrangement on valentines day. It had long stopped irritating him whenever thought about it. The initial jealousy had come and crested like a wave and was gone then. Now it crashes in like a tsunami.

It’s not just jealousy he feels, but a strange sense of being lost. Like he’s walking through a fog with a blindfold. He’s aware of what he did, when he decided to turn his back on his duty and be selfish. He knows well there are some things he can’t ever give you.

A normal, happy life is one of them.

He can give you whatever you ask for, anything you want it’s yours without question. But what happens later? Years down the road and you’re married to him and he can’t give you the one thing you’ll want then.

The person meant for you could give that to you.

He’s being selfish. You’ve never complained, but Seokjin knows you must’ve wondered about it by now. The what if. Maybe...perhaps it would've been better if he'd followed through with leaving then...

“Jin?” you call softly, ducking your head a bit to meet his gaze, “Talk to me, what is it?”

“Do you regret it?” His voice is just as soft, looking down at his feet. He looks up, somewhere above your head, sighing, “Do you know that he’s the one who sent you those flowers?”

You seem confused for a moment, and then recollection lights in your eyes. “Oh! Oh...Jin.” you chuckle a bit and step closer.

“Don’t laugh, it’s not funny.” Seokjin groans, and meets you halfway when you reach for him. Your fingers dance at the nape of his neck and Seokjin pulls you closer by the waist.

“Is that what was bothering you?”

He can only hum, and you chuckle again. The warmth of your hand rubs circles against his back and he feels that warmth seep into his bones and settle there.

“I don’t regret anything. None of it.” You murmur against his neck, and Seokjin pulls away, cupping your cheek with a hand. His thumb gently caresses, and he meets your eyes for the first time in a while and calls your name softly.

“There are things that I can’t give you.”

“So?”

There’s a fierce look in your eyes that makes Seokjin wrap his next set of words up neatly and swallow them.

“None of that matters. You’re more than enough.”

Seokjin closes the gap between you both, pressing his lips firmly to yours. The arm at your waist pulls you close and the hand that sits at the side of your neck tails into your hair to tug at the many pins that you’d secured it with.

He spins you with practiced ease, pressing your back against the wall of the entryway and crowding your space.

He places a kiss at the corner of your mouth just to tease, and chuckles when you chase. His kisses trail along your jaw, stopping just below your ear, and he takes the lobe between his teeth.

The little sound you make shoots down his spine, and he feels your fingers curl into the fabric of his sweater. He taps at your waist, his hand trailing over the curve of your ass and he gives you a moment to settle your arms securely around his neck before he lifts.

He doesn’t need to see where he’s going to find his way to your bedroom, and he busies himself with kissing and marking the skin he could reach. The fingers of his other hand finding the zipper at the back of your dress to tug down.

He sets you on your feet, pulling back just enough to help you out of your dress, his eyes still closed as he trails his lips over your collarbone, pushing the fabric off your body until it pools at your feet. Your skin is warm where he touches, he ghosts his fingers along your sides and revels the way you visibly shiver.

The bralette you chose for the night is lace and hides nothing from his hooded gaze, your nipples taut from the chill and his caress. He thumbs at the peaks, and when you tug on the hem of his sweater, he tuts at your impatience.

His hand slides up your back, unclasping the bralette and pushing you gently back until you hit the bed. The straps slide down your arms and he tugs it off, palming at a breast with a groan trapped behind his teeth.

“Jin..” you sigh his name and Seokjin hums, tilting his head at you.

He leans into you and you fall back. Seokjin holds his weight on his hands just above tour shoulders, and his knees trapping your thighs between them. He watches you blink up at him with some confusion as he simply stares.

“Let me ask you something.” He says, and then he shift, getting onto the bed and sitting with his back against the headboard. He curls his fingers at you, and with a bit of uncertainty tinting your form you follow. He settles you between his spread legs, pressing a kiss to the junction where your neck meets your shoulder as he traces patterns against the skin of your thighs.

He spreads you legs with a gentle hand, bringing his legs up a bit so that the back of your knees hooks against his thigh. Seokjin brings his hand down quickly, the lace of your underwear does nothing to shield you from it and he chuckles when your surprised whine meets his ears. He feels you trying to snap your legs shut as the sting of his hand runs through you, the way your back arches away from his chest.

“Tell me, sweet girl.” Seokjin coos, and he decides to be nice, rubbing soothing circles against your lace covered pussy. He could feel just how wet you are, your panties slide against your slick skin with his movements, damp against his hand. “Do you think you’re deserving of my touch right now?”

Your exhale rattles against his chest, and he waits patiently for your answer. He allows you a moment to think, and he knows it’s hard, as his fingers tease at the seam of your underwear, slipping underneath to find the wetness there.

“I am.” You finally say.

“Oh, are you?” Seokjin chuckles, dipping a finger into the warmth of you just to hear your gasping moan. He presses the finger against your clit, circling once, twice, and then he stops. “Do you want me to tell you why you’re not?”

Seokjin kisses your jaw, and the slight shift of your hips doesn’t go unnoticed. “You let that man get near you. Allowed him to act like I wasn’t there. Ignored the way he was looking at you.”

“Jin, it wasn’t...”

“Shh,” Seokjin shushes you gently, fingers resuming the slow, torturous grind against your clit. “I should make you cum until you cry.”

The whimper you let out makes his slacks feel constricting. He sinks two fingers, knuckle deep into you and kisses your neck when your head lulls back against his shoulder. He watches the way his hand moves under your panties, curling his fingers against the spot that makes your toes curl.

He presses the heel of his palm against your clit, and runs his tongue along the shell of your ear when your pussy clenches and your moans go up in pitch.

“Close already?” Seokjin coos mockingly, a chuckle on his exhale. The fingers of his other hand pinching lightly at your nipples, and then he stops, “That’s too bad, then.”

Your groan holds frustration and Seokjin unhooks your legs from his. He stands to rid himself of his clothes, his cock hard and weeping when it slaps lightly against his stomach. The reaction you invoke in him has never changed, a shiver slithers down his spine and watches at your tongue darts out to moisten your lips. You reach a hand out to him and Seokjin takes it, bending a little at his waist to press kisses against your fingers.

He fishes a condom from your nightstand – ever mindful – and then crawls between your legs, taking a moment to slide your panties down them.

“Okay?” He asks to make sure that you’re okay to continue, that he’s not driving you too hard.

You nod, and you lift your hips, pressing his cock between your wet heat and his stomach. Seokjin groans against your lips, tightening his grip against your thigh.

He moves his hips, pulling back and then pushing into you with slow, languid strokes. He kisses you tenderly, his tongue exploring your mouth. When his fingers brush against your clit, the way your core tightens around his cock has him seeing stars. His thrusts gets faster, and he knows just how quickly you’re hurdling towards your end, he watches every minute expression. The way your eyes squeeze shut and how your lips curl around his name, the scratching of your nails down his back.

Just as you reach the peak, Seokjin moves his hand away and slows his thrusts, leaving you trembling and whining. He smiles against your lips, and whispers, “Let’s take this slow.” He kisses you again, his thrusts becoming slower and gentler.

He continues to move in and out of you at a slow, steady pace, taking his time to bring you to the edge of pleasure again and again. Eventually, he begins to speed up, and he moves his hand back to your clit, sending you over the edge into a powerful orgasm.

“Fuck.” Seokjin groans, following not long after, his forehead against your collarbone. There’s a ringing in ears when he comes down, and he presses a kiss to your sternum before pulling away.

After you were both cleaned up and the sheets were changed, Seokjin holds you close as you both watch the couple of minutes tick by until midnight.

“Do you have any resolutions?” Your head is against his chest, a leg over his hip.

He traces patterns against your thigh, thinking quietly. This is another one of those human things that he wouldn’t ever grasp. You rang in the last new year with Yoongi and Hoseok while he was busy with his duties with the other Cupids in the area, so you must’ve had this question for a while.

Seokjin hums softly, “Loving you. That’s it.” He smiles when you giggle and when the fireworks start up at the stroke of midnight you both watch them light up the night sky through your open window.

“Happy New Year, Jinnie.”

Seokjin turns, capturing your lips in a gentle kiss and he whispers the words back to you.

You both lay there for a moment, quiet, and then Seokjin speaks: “You know, I could make him fall in love with his office chair or something.”

“Jin.”

tagging: @xpeachesncream @bangtansmauyeondan @taestefully-in-luv @blog-name-idk @madbutgloriouspond @euphoricfilter @luaspersona @mssukeyna @allhobbitstoisengard @eoieopda @minmin2022 @liveyun

[lgbtlunaverse]

I've talked before about how I think Jgy's specific attitude to defending his actions comes less from a genuine conviction that he's in the right or holds no responsibility and more from a knowledge that any punishment he'd be given would be more because of who his mother was than anything he actually did, and a person with more power of a "cleaner" background wouldn't be punished the same way. Why accept "consequences" for his actions when that's just a smokescreen for what people really want to punish him for. Daring to stand before them instead of knowing his place.

And if I do envision a socratic dialogue with an imaginary nie mingjue in my head, a counterpoint might be that, well yeah at first, sure. But there's a point where punishment doesn't get worse than, y'know, death. And surely at some point in canon jgy passes the threshold where, even if he wasn't the son of a sex worker, he would... "deserve to die" isn't right here because I personally don't believe in the death penalty but basically that, within the moral framework of the world of mdzs where the death penalty is universally accepted, characters would, regadless of his background, rationally agree that the just punishment was death. The moment jgy crosses this threshold, then- and I have no interest in debating when this would be- it wouldn't matter that in reality his punishment was really for something else, because it'd be virtually the same as the "just" consequences of his actions.

And what I like is that the story FORCES you to ask that question, to entertain that argument, and perhaps see the flaws in it. Because it expicitly kills jgy for something he didn't do. Huaisang couldn't have said anything, and jgy would still have been taken prisoner, and the cultivation world would still have demanded his head. He'd have been tried for his crimes and executed. The story could have done that, and everything i said above would still have been true, but you could very easily wash your hands of it and say that justice was served.

Instead Huaisang lies, and Jin Guangyao is killed for something he never did. And the story asks: does that change things? Does it matter, that he died for something he didn't do when all of his actual actions were already enough to doom him? And if it does, what else does that change? Because that has always been the case. That was always going to be the case.

[marshmallowwitharubberband]

Something that pops up at me in MXTX's stories is the duality of suffering from "can't have women thriving in my very gay sausage fest" syndrome (which is very prevalent in BL and some people categorize as internalized misogyny — something I don't wanna get into rn), but at the same time, a recurring but subtle (or maybe ignored) theme in her stories is portraying sex workers as people. All three of her novels feature prostitutes as background characters, but, for the most part, their portrayal isn't truly negative.

Shen Jiu preferred sleeping in brothels because he felt safer there, and it's treated as something tragic but ultimately harmless.

Jin Guangyao was reviled for being a prostitute's son, but this is clearly stated by the novel to be morally wrong and fueled by the nobles' prejudice and superficiality.

Wei Wuxian was a-ok with hanging out with or helping ghost sex workers and doesn't call any sort of attention to it. They're just regular ghosts to him.

Even Xie Lian's encounter with the brothel workers in Ghost Town doesn't paint them in a bad light, they're merely pushy like any other vendor of any other product would be.

Whatever their role or narrative purpose when they appear, they aren't portrayed like some symbol of corruption or evil, they're simply workers doing their job.

That's pretty neat.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed, Episode 41 part one

(Masterpost) (Pinboard)  (whole thing on AO3)

Warning! Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

Empathy

We start off with Wei Wuxian, paper edition, flinging himself onto the surprisingly well-preserved face of Nie Mingjue.

Back in their room, Lan Wangji immediately recognizes that Wei Wuxian is doing empathy, even though it's an advanced technique that Lan Wangji hasn't seen him use before, as far as I can recall. Maybe the wind from nowhere that kicks up as soon as the empathy session starts is an indicator he's been trained to recognize.

Lan Wangji: Where's my fan?

Watercooler Gossip

We head into an extended flashback from Nie Mingjue's memories.

Dead-Nie-Mingjue spends a surprising amount of time thinking about how sexy and imposing he used to be, as well as remembering things he wasn't actually there to witness. The whole sequence is presented in usual close-third-person narrative POV. Maybe when we die, we switch to third-person camera view. *shrug*

Nie Mingjue finishes off a couple of Zombies without wiping his sabre, which would make Aslan very unhappy if we were in Narnia.

Then he glares angrily at his crew of cheerful disciples and their unbloodied swords, for reasons that are unclear. He's an angry guy.

(More behind the cut!)

He says to call the dude who was "the last one to stay guard last time." When they say it's Meng Yao he looks shocked. I don't know why he's shocked because I don't know what he actually means by "the last one to stay guard last time." On Netflix this is translated as the dude who "stayed the latest last time," which I guess means that Meng Yao works harder than everyone else? But apparently the result is that he is required to carry water for the rest of the group, so maybe it means he's a slacker? Without seeing the duty roster I can't really tell what the deal is here.

Next we see Meng Yao walking up with a whole bunch of water bottles on a hill above the CDrama River of Questionable Life Choices, where we have previously seen Wei Wuxian, Wen Kexing, A-Qing, and maybe those Lotus Casebook guys.

He approaches the mouth of a (incredibly beautiful) cave, where he can hear people talking shit about him inside.

Instead of going inside and telling them to shut their collective pie hole, he goes and sits by a tree to have lunch by himself. With…all the water? They should have waited to insult him until AFTER the water delivery. Jeez, these guys are dumb.

While he chows down on his bread, he keeps glancing wistfully at the cave where the dudes are, but somehow fails to notice Nie Mingjue walking up to him until he's 2 feet away.

Nie Mingjue asks why Meng Yao isn't in the cave with the others. Meng Yao makes a face at the cave and Nie Mingjue strides over there, eager for an opportunity to be pissed off about something.

They walk into the cave together and the dudes are STILL talking shit about him. I get that gossip is fun, but there are only 3 things to know about Meng Yao. 1. Mom was a sex worker 2. dad is reknowned creep Jin Guangshan 3. got kicked down the stairs at Jinlintai. That's it.

Anyone who enjoys gossip knows that the conversation would have shifted by now, to one of the following topics: 1. who else's mom is a sex worker? Yours, no yours! 2. the further creep adventures of Jin Guangshan 3. every over-long staircase that anyone in the group has ever heard of, and everyone who either climbed up it or fell down it.

Instead, the conversation has stayed resolutely on the topic of Meng Yao, and Nie Mingjue just stands there with him behind a rock wall, listening while his guys lay out all of the embarrasing detail, along with their big opinions.

One guy says that Meng Yao has accepted his fate and has to run and get water for them, but another guy says he hasn't accepted it, that he's diligent & working hard all the time so he can gain fame and get his father to acknowledge him. This is the only guy who has said anything positive about him, and this is the speech Nie Mingjue decides to interrupt, rather than the speech about how many men Meng Yao's mom has fucked. What the hell, Nie Mingjue? Nie Minjue clearly has no interest in saving Meng Yao embarrassment.

Nie Mingjue yells at everyone and tells Meng Yao that the more that these assholes talk shit about him, the more he has to achieve to make sure there's nothing they can say. Which is…pretty decent advice, sadly.

While Nie Mingjue delivers his lecture, Meng Yao mentally counts up how many guys he's going to be murdering later. Then Nie Mingjue pointedly promotes him to be his deputy General. Meng Yao thanks him formally and apparently sincerely.

Before we jump ahead to what happens next, let's talk about how this scene sets up the relationship between Nie Mingjue and Meng Yao. I think it's a super toxic relationship right from the get-go.

When I first watched this scene it played like a leader seeing the value in his subordinate, defending him from his peers, and elevating him as a reward for his hard work. But I think that's not really what we're seeing. Nie Mingjue's focus throughout this encounter is on the rest of his men; specifically on their unvirtuous behavior and his rage about it. He's using Meng Yao to teach them a lesson, and it seems like he elevates him above them not as a reward for himself, but as a punishment for them.

On the flip side, Meng Yao's lunchtime pity party seems a lot less spontaneous to me, now that I've seen so many other Wuxia & Xianxia dramas, than it did when I first fell into this CDrama rabbit hole. His meek, butthurt reaction to people talking shit about him is inappropriate for a cultivator or any fighter in the Jianghu. It's an entire culture based around fighting and responding to challenges. He definitely doesn't lack courage, so I think his meekness in this situation is crafted for its effect on Nie Mingjue.

Cloud Recesses Revisited

Let's have a flashback of our own, so we can compare this meeting with Meng Yao's first meeting with Lan Xichen, back in Episode 4.

When Meng Yao is presented, some Jiang sect douchebags in the back lay out his whole backstory in loud stage whispers. Lan Qiren quickly silences them -- without losing his temper, notably.

Even though he's a grumpy SOB who doesn't normally hesitate to yell at Wei Wuxian students, he does not embarrass Meng Yao by making a big deal of the situation; not even to say Gossip is Forbidden.

Lan Xichen then steps up and, smooth king that he is, drops the piece of gossip HE has heard about Meng Yao: "I've heard that Clan Leader Nie has a helpful assistant." Then he compliments the elegance of his speech, saying that he matches up to his expectations.

Then he strokes his fingers while he praises the gift he's brought. Then he grabs him and kisses him passionately in front of everyone Ahem. Pardon me.

Where Nie Mingjue's reaction to malicious gossip is to listen to every word of it and then make a big show of criticizing the people speaking, Lan Xichen moves to counteract it with praise, subtly shaming the gossipers in a way that genuinely uplifts Meng Yao. And he does it just because he's a nice guy who finds Meng Yao pleasing, not because he requires anything from him. Whereas Nie Mingjue appears to require quite a lot from Meng Yao.

Nie Mingjue's goal seems to be to improve Meng Yao in a fundamental way; to educate him and sort of force him onto the path of virtue. He also wants to use him to force his men onto the path of virtue...a path he himself does not, actually, walk.

Murder Will Out

Next we jump ahead to Meng Yao shanking the guard captain.

I think Nie Mingjue needs to overhaul his hiring practices because this dude is very easy to stab and perhaps should not be in charge of anything relating to combat. Maybe the "block" button on his game controller broke.

Note that Meng Yao picks up a saber to do this - not a Wen sword, but a Nie saber, which might be a props error, since later Nie Mingjue accuses him of deliberately using a Wen sword to disguise his actions.

We've seen these events before, back in episode 10, but the editing adds some things in the current episode, and removes others. Let's look at the differences.

1. Drunk Guard Captain

The night before this fight, there's a banquet and Meng Yao spends most of it making out with guarding Xue Yang. He does this by checking on him a bunch, which doesn't seem like it should be necessary in a fortress with a proper dungeon, but whatevs.

In Episode 10, we see Meng Yao briefly encounter the drunken, hostile guard captain, who shoulder-checks him and calls him son of a [sex worker], but otherwise we don't see any of their conversation.

In Episode 41, Nie Mingjue's head remembers a longer version of the encounter, with bonus vomiting. The captain tells Meng Yao he saw him talking to someone, asks what he's up to, accuses him of lying, and Meng Yao tells the captain's sidekick to put his drunk ass to bed.

This whole scene is HILARIOUS when you consider that this is Nie Mingjue's mental account of events, which means the Captain must have put everything we see in his report to the boss.

"Well, sir, I was incredibly drunk and vomiting in public near the Lan guest quarters when that twink that you like was seen talking to someone, so I roughed him up a bit and insulted his mother before I went to pass out from drunkenness. I hope you will reprimand him for his bad behavior."

That scene, in Episode 41, ends with Meng Yao all alone, straightening and brushing off his clothes and making his "I'm plotting your death" face.

Nie Mingjue sure does remember a lot of stuff he wasn't actually around to see. Maybe he's filling in gaps with everything he's heard during all the times Meng Yao has stood in front of his head-shelf and gloated out loud about stuff.

2. Wens Attack

In episode 10, Wen Chao and Wen Zhuliu bring some guys to attack the Unclean Realm. Meng Yao goes and stabs the guard captain while Nie Mingjue is in a melee 1-on-1 with Wen Zhuliu, which requires all of his focus and spinning.

Nie Mingjue glances to the side in a moment of respite and sees Meng Yao stabbing the guard captain; he promptly forgets about fighting Wen Zhuliu in order to go shout at Meng Yao.

Meng Yao pulls on a tee shirt that says "commmit to the bit" and proceeds to say "it wasn't me" over and over despite having been caught red-handed.

This distraction enables Wen Zhuliu to almost stab Nie Mingjue, but he's saved by Meng Yao throwing himself in the way of the blade. These people should learn to block with something besides their torsos.

In Episode 41, Nie Mingjue's head has forgotten that Wen Zhuliu was ever there, and doesn't focus on the other Wen dudes right in his eye line. He notices Meng Yao acting a tiny bit squirrely and stops fighting in order to go follow him. Like. Stops fighting to defend his fortress, seat of his power, family home, etc., because he doesn't trust his subordinate.

Did I mention the need to overhaul Nie Clan hiring practices? Also some management training wouldn't be out of place.

Nie Mingjue's head also remembers that Meng Yao smirked evilly while doing the stabbing.

It's cool that he had time to notice this and be shocked and appalled rather than, you know, moving quickly to intercept the blow or otherwise help his captain out.

Side note: Meng Yao doesn't wipe his saber when he's done with it. Aslan is sad now.

3. You're Fired

After the battle is resolved, we go to Nie Mingjue's office. In episode 10 we jump in with Meng Yao groveling on the floor while Nie Mingjue yells at him. In Episode 41, we learn that he's on the floor not because he put himself there, but because Nie Mingjue apparently kicked him and his recent chest wound across the room.

In Episode 10, Meng Yao makes it makes it clear that he killed the guard captain on purpose, and gives a pretty good list of reasons for killing him.

you promoted me to vice general, but he always looked down on me

insulting, beating, and humiliating me

taking credit for my achievements

he let Xue Yang go

Meng Yao says that he could tolerate the first two problems, but he 100% will not tolerate #3. It's not about personal pride, for him, it's about ambition.

There's always gonna be another mountain I'm always gonna wanna make it move Always gonna be an uphill battle Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose Ain't about how fast I get there Ain't about what's waiting on the other side It's the climb

The part about Xue Yang is bullshit, of course, but the rest seem like pretty okay reasons for killing the guy. I mean, in the world of the show, where justice is mostly determined by stabbing.

Nie Mingjue doesn't think pride in your own achievements is a good enough reason, and banishes him.

In Episode 41, Nie Mingjue remembers things differently; this time Meng Yao's justification is:

He let Xue Yang go

He wanted to kill me

He insulted my mother

This time, Nie Mingjue feels like it would be ok to kill the captain in a sudden moment of anger, but if that was how it went down, you wouldn't have an evil smirk on your face. Also, why pretend that Xue Yang did it and why use a Wen Sword? [it was clearly a Nie saber, bruh]

Nie Mingjue thinks he's been planning this for a long time, because the guard captain told him that Meng Yao was colluding with Xue Yang. Nie Mingjue has ALMOST figured out what's going on here, but his anger is making him stupid.

Instead of following through to the logical conclusion that Meng Yao is getting up to some shenanigans with Xue Yang, he focuses on his own hurt feelings, suspecting that Meng Yao was manipulating him from the beginning. Which, of course, he was, but Nie Mingjue was using Meng Yao, too. Red flags all around.

He wonders if Meng Yao would have killed the caveful of bullies if Nie Mingjue hadn't come to help him out. Which is ridiculous since Meng Yao was just sitting and having his lunch when NMJ showed up; if he felt like killing those guys it would be pretty simple to poison the water they were making him carry for them.

Nie Mingjue proceeds to banish Meng Yao not precisely for killing a guy without permission, but for having the wrong priorities and values. So he really shouldn't be surprised when Meng Yao goes to work for Wen Ruohan.

Soundtrack: The Climb, Alan Cumming version

[khattikeri]

drives me nuts when people treat jin guangyao or wei wuxian like they're socialist revolutionaries like no! they're not!! in fact their respective roles in society and complacency regarding its hierarchies is why ANY of the story even happens to begin with!!!

jin guangyao doesn't hold bitterness just because he was born lower class. he is bitter because others deride him and his prostitute mother in spite of both their intelligence, skills, and efforts to climb the ladder.

why do you think we were shown scenes of other prostitutes in the brothel deriding meng shi for being literate, for "trying" so hard? why do you think we were shown scenes of anxin taunting meng yao and throwing shit at him because he was trying to learn cultivation at his mother's behest?

why do you think jin guangyao arranged for the arson of that brothel, burned to the ground with everyone except sisi inside? that's not the behavior of someone who believes in true equality and the inherent worth of sex workers as human beings!

that's the behavior of someone who thinks he's better than them. the behavior of a man who already came up on top through political games and war crimes, backstabbing and spying for the sake of the "greater good".

i won't rehash his argument to nie mingjue that he didn't have a choice-- he had some choice, but no matter what he does his class will come up and people will always assume the worst and try to hurt him for it, which forces his hand to do whatever will protect him best (hence 'no choice').

jin guangyao did everything he could to secure his own safety and a place among those already higher up. and by that point, he'd won it.

the fact that the temple rebuilt on the brothel site is to guanyin, the goddess of mercy, is even more ironic! the fact that jin guangyao has the goddess's statue carved to look like his own mother is proof that he viewed both her and himself as higher than them. more worthy than them.

of course he cared about the general welfare of others (read: the watchtowers). but consider also that there is no watchtower near yi city, which ended up being one of xue yang's playgrounds. jin guangyao can and will turn a blind eye to certain sufferings if it is convenient to him.

sure, jin guangyao made undeniable contributions to cultivation society and accessibility, but he is not at any point trying to topple existing class structures. his adherence to them is in fact integral to his own downfall in the end.

it brings with it the inevitability of society conveniently ignoring his triumphs and genuine moments of humanity to deride him once more as an evil, disgusting son of a whore once his crimes come to light.

now for wei wuxian. he's the righteous protagonist of the story and he doesn't give a fuck what society thinks, yes, but he wasn't out there trying to cause an uprising so that all the poor servant classes and lower could become cultivators. he wasn't trying to redistribute wealth or insinuate that those who are lower deserve to be viewed as equal to the gentry.

the most critical and non-explicitly stated fact of mo dao zu shi is that wei wuxian has always been resigned to his position in the social hierarchy.

his unreliable narration, especially regarding his own past and thoughts, is so damn important. he doesn't EVER tell the reader directly that people treated him any which way at their leisure because of his parents' differing social classes.

no. instead we are shown how much prestige he is afforded as cangse-sanren's son-- reputation as a talented and charming young cultivator, made head disciple of Yunmeng Jiang-- and how little respect he is given in the same breath, as the son of servant wei changze.

the way he is treated by others is as fickle as the wind. if he obeys and does as told, there is no reward. of course he did that, that was the expectation to start with! if he does anything even slightly inconvenient, there is a punishment. of course he has no manners, what else would you expect from an ungrateful son of a servant?

wei wuxian's righteousness is not a matter of adhering to principles he was explicitly taught, the way nie mingjue values honor or the way jiang cheng always tries to prove himself. wei wuxian does the right thing regardless of what the consequences are to him because his good deeds are always downplayed and his bad deeds are always singled out, no matter who or how many people were doing it with him.

he has faced this double standard since childhood. there are points in the novel where it's clear that this sticks out to wei wuxian, but does he ever fight back against that view of himself? does he EVER, at any point in the story, explain his actions and choices to jianghu society and try to debate or appeal to their sense of reason?

no. because he knows, at his very core, that any explicit deviation from their interests whatsoever will be punished.

slaughtering thousands of people is fine when they want him to do it, and when the alternative is unjust torture, re-education camps, and encroachment upon other sects' lands.

slaughtering thousands of people who are trying to paint him as evil for not going along with their genocidal plans, however, is punished.

wei wuxian knows his acceptance among the higher classes is superficial and unsteady. from the age of 10, when jiang fengmian took him in, he knew subconsciously that he could be kicked out at any time.

he knows that cultivation society doesn't care about war crimes and concentration camps and mistreatment of the remaining wen survivors of the sunshot campaign. but the right thing to do now that they aren't at wartime is to help them, plus they'd punish him either way for it, so he will.

in this regard wei wuxian is more self-aware of his position than jin guangyao. he does care about common people and he does try his best to help them as an individual. even if that ends up with him disabled, arrested, targeted in sieges, or dead.

but is he revolutionary? in the full equality, fight the establishment, rewrite laws, change social structures and people's perceptions of class sense?

no. no. he isn't.

now my knowledge of chinese society and history is fairly limited to my hindu diaspora upbringing and our shared cultural similarities ... but speaking to what i absolutely know us true, adherence to one's social class is expected.

this is rigid. efforts and merits might bring you some level of mobility, but in the end, the circumstances of your birth will always be scrutinized first, and your behavior compared to the stereotypes of where and how you originate.

mdzs is not about revolution, and none of its characters are able to truly change its society. there is no grand "maybe cutsleeves aren't inherently bad" or "i'm sorry for persecuting you and believing hearsay, you were truly a good person all along!" at the finale.

people ignore history and repeat it again with the next batch of ugly gossip and rumors.

wei wuxian, lan wangji, and luo qingyang find peace only by distancing themselves from cultivation society and its opinions.

jin guangyao and wei wuxian both cannot ever escape from others' perception of their origins and actions. regardless of their personal beliefs, they are not revolutionaries.

[danmei-confessions]

i am way more disgusted by wei wuxian’s brutal, sexualized murders of both wang lingjiao and wen chao than i am by anything jin guangyao does to the sex workers. jin guangyao may have had those sex workers executed to cover up his complicity in his father’s death, but he doesn’t torture them sexually for the express purpose of seeing them suffer. which is something wei wuxian definitely does to wang lingjiao.

“no it was the ghosts” lmfao whatever you need to tell yourselves to preserve your fanon interpretation of wei wuxian, bastion of morality and cuddler of bunnies. but he was right there watching this go down. killing a woman in a different, less sexually charged way was totally within weight wuxian’s power, and he chose the most vulgar and humiliating method he could imagine.

and no, she didn’t deserve it. no one deserves to die like that. not even wang lingjiao.

.