#john says gaslight gatekeep girlboss rights

[pinkforwinter]

may i request yandere John with a reader who is socially awkward but wants to connect with people? if not, maybe a reader who has chronic stress (or anything in general, I’m starvedddd of yan!uno)

also, not a req, but i think you might like Code Adam by Atterozen on webtoon, it’s one of my favs 💞

Ask and you shall receive, anon. ❤

This is a slightly different writing style then the last post but I'm trying to experiment to see what feels right.

Also, it's funny you recommend that to me. I actually subscribed to Code Adam but never got around to reading it. I'll have to remember to start reading it soon!

This took a lot longer then it should have so have an longer response in return.

Warnings: Yandere

Yandere!John falling for an SO that is socially awkward.

John is definitely going to be the delusional and manipulative type of yandere.

Worst part about all of this is that when you're socially awkward you might struggle to see signs other people might easily catch. That's going to come back and bite you very quickly with John.

As we've all seen, John is a very good actor. He had everyone fooled he was a helpless cripple for a very long time. That being said, there are some subtle signs that you can look out for at the beginning. Read: subtle.

You witnessed him getting beaten down one day and walk away absolutely pissed off and think to yourself "that dude needs a friend and so do I." And so you conjured up the will to not completely put your foot in your mouth and began to seek him out.

At the beginning, John didn't even notice you. You were quiet and unassuming, though you stumbled over your own words a lot and got nervous very easily around other people. You were just another student that didn't matter to him. He rebuffed your attempts to talk to him far too many times.

Ironically, Seraphina was the one to point out how you were trying to befriend him. At first, he doesn't believe her as nobody would willingly try to become friends with the cripple, right?? Then he saw you, sitting alone in the corner, quietly watching a group of friends pass you by with a look of longing in your eyes and was immediately intrigued. Especially so when he approached you and your face lit up when he invited you to sit with him and Seraphina.

It didn't take long for him to start noticing you after that. His eyes would immediately seek you out whether he wanted them to or not. He began to take notice how hard you were trying to make friends- and how easily they rebuked you. Just like he did.

John began to grow protective of you after that realization. You were so kind, so good, so perfect. You might be a little slow socially but just made you all the cuter in his opinion. His intrigue quickly morphed into infatuation and from there he began to notice things that he never noticed before.

The way your smile would soften just for him- the way your eyes would glitter whenever he would go out of his way to approach you- rushing after him when he left his books on the rooftop by accident...

You liked him, too, right? All the signs pointed that you did. You were always so sweet to him. You just had to be into him- there was no other explanation.

From there, things began to spiral. Johns mask began to slip as he began to lash out at the other students for even daring to look at you weird. It probably won't take long for you to begin to notice something was very wrong at that point.

But it only grows worse from there. As John begins to grow more obsessive, he starts to stalk walk you home from a distance. He wouldn't want you getting hurt when he could've been there to stop it, after all.

Confronting him at that point will be an instant loss. You'll be gaslit and lied to so hard, he'll have you sure you're going insane. And he's so efficient at keeping up his lies that there'll be next to no chance to catch him in the act of doing so.

Slowly, he isolates you. Any friends you may have had are chased off or beaten down at the first opportunity. Oh, he won't kill anyone; maybe put them so deep in a coma they might never wake up but hey, theres always a risk when getting into fights, right? Seraphina may try to convene at this point but John easily wards her off and by the time she realizes she was right, it'll be too late.

Then, when you're left all alone and so lonely, John will move in and sweep you off your feet. He'll worship you so completely you won't be able to think of anybody but him. He wouldn't want his goddess to feel like she needs anybody else after all. He's all you need- he's always known that and now you do, too.

[erikahenningsen]

4 cady/regina?

4. “Do you…well…I mean…I could give you a massage?”

Cady's been spending a lot of time with Regina lately. Just them, no Gretchen or Karen.

It isn't until she's started spending her afternoons doing homework sprawled out on Regina's fluffy white rug that Cady realizes how much of a performance Regina was putting on every time they would hang out as a group.

Cady has learned a lot about Regina just in the last few weeks—she likes to read, for one thing. And not the teen romance novels that are Cady's personal guilty pleasure. Regina reads Shakespeare, Richard Wright, John Steinbeck.

This afternoon, Regina is sitting in her bed propped up on no less than four pillows reading a thick biography of Joe McCarthy ("He originated gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss," Regina had said when Cady asked about it) while Cady works her way through her calculus homework.

The problem with doing her homework at Regina's is that Cady often finds herself staring at Regina—the way she squints slightly in concentration or taps a pen against her teeth absently—without even realizing she's doing it. She's gotten caught multiple times, but Regina only ever blushes a little and goes back to whatever she was doing, so Cady hasn't really tried to stop.

Which is how Cady notices that Regina has been shifting restlessly for the last twenty minutes, seemingly unable to get comfortable, but Cady doesn't say anything until Regina lets out a soft grunt of pain.

"Are you okay?" Cady asks.

"My back is bothering me," Regina says, softly, like she doesn't want to admit it.

Cady frowns. "Why?"

"I got hit by a bus." Regina tosses one of her pillows onto the floor.

"Oh." Cady looks down, mentally kicking herself. "Right. Sorry."

"It's not your fault," Regina reminds her, her voice a little tight.

They're quiet for a few minutes, and Cady can tell Regina is trying not to move around too much, but her mouth is tense and she's breathing harshly through her nose. Something about the sight makes Cady's chest tighten.

"Do you... well..." Cady starts hesitantly. "I mean... I could give you a massage?"

Regina just stares at her for a moment. "A massage?"

"Yeah like... with my hands?" Cady says, holding her hands up, because she's still incapable of not sounding like an idiot in front of a crush.

Cady's brain screeches to a halt for a moment at the sudden realization of what she feels for Regina but she has to quickly file that thought away to obsess over later because Regina says, "Okay."

Cady climbs onto the bed, gesturing for Regina to sit in front of her, because if she has to straddle Regina while she lies on her stomach Cady's brain will actually explode and she will die right here in Regina's bedroom without ever having taken AP Calculus BC.

Tentatively, Cady sweeps Regina's hair to the side and places her hands on her shoulders, digging her thumbs into the space between Regina's shoulder blades.

Carefully, Cady massages the muscles of Regina's back, the way her mom used to do for her when she couldn't sleep, their breathing only sound in the room.

Until Regina lets out a soft sound that Cady knows she'll be repeating in her mind for the rest of the day, the rest of the week, maybe the rest of her life. She doesn't know how she can ever think about anything but that sound, low and intimate and triggering wholly inappropriate thoughts that she tries to get under control because a small part of her is still convinced Regina is, on some level, telepathic.

"Hey," Regina complains, wiggling a little, and Cady realizes her hands have stopped moving.

"Sorry," Cady says, resuming her massage, although she feels a little like she's a puppeteer controlling her arms by strings from above.

"Thanks," Regina says after another few minutes, turning around to give Cady a soft smile. "That helped."

Cady just nods, knowing she is absolutely screwed.

[lycanlovingvampyre]

MAG 183 Relisten

Activity on my first listen: cutting the jasmine in my garden.

Wanna say right at the start of this episode, I loooove the soundscaping in this one! Especially the sounds during the dialogue scenes.

MARTIN:"Oh, bugger off!" JON: "Everything alright?" Ha, Jon's tone xD Like "Heh, I know what you're going to say".

JON: "It’s a building. A tower, in a sense." MARTIN: "Oh yeah? And what sense might that be?" JON: [Faintly ominous] "The Tarot sense." I thought the Ivory sense, but okay?

MARTIN: "Really?" JON: "What? No. Sorry, it… felt like a good line." MARTIN: "No, no, it was. I just… I dunno, I… you did the look and… It’s fine, sorry." Okay, Martin finally seems to get one of Jon's jokes, but I don't, can someone explain this to me? XD Like The Tower of the Major Arcana? What's up with "the look"? Anything specific or just Jon being a theater kid?

MARTIN: "What, what’s the deal, though? Parts of it almost look like –" JON: "The Institute." MARTIN: "Yeah." JON: "Yes. It makes sense. After all, it was built on the ruins of what Robert Smirke constructed." Also, like... The Magnus Institute was an academic institution. And this domain is about academia as far as I remember...?

HELEN: "I was so looking forward to catching up after that whole Basira and Daisy thing, but then pfft! You both disappear. I’d be very keen to know how you managed that little trick." MARTIN: "Why, it caught us by surprise too. I mean, w-we actually ended –" JON: [Firmly] "We found somewhere to rest. That’s all." MARTIN: "Oh, yeah. Ah. Yes." Hm, makes sense that Martin would tell her. With Helen per se he didn't really have any bad experiences yet (He did with Michael, but Helen is definitely different and that can draw a mental line, not seeing that it's actually still the same being). Jon on the other hand, oohohoho... He knows not to trust her.

JON: "She made her choice." HELEN: "With your assistance." JON: "It was still her choice." Ahhh, the choice and free will theme again!

JON: "Martin, I’d prefer we talk about this alone." HELEN: "Oh, I bet you would. You were probably just going to bypass it entirely, weren’t you? I can’t believe you would deny him the choice to see his own domain." MARTIN: "My… my wha– John, my what?" It's not Jon's fault they're being stalked by gaslight gatekeep girlboss all the time so she can show up and sprinkle some of her manipulation all over them, so they would start to argue. Good thing Jon and Martin are better than that. And technically, Martin should already have a strong suspicion he has a domain, they talked about it in MAG 167. Jon said they all have a domain and when Martin asked about his, Jon wanted to check in, if he really wants to know about it and Martin immediately declines. Being in denial of something or intentionally looking away doesn’t mean that that thing isn’t real.

Hm... This really took it out of Martin though. Normally he wants to talk things through, but now he rather has a moment to quietly think about it...

"The one who sits in the central chamber cannot remember his name. But he knows that people called him ‘doctor’. He made sure of that. To ignore it would have been the greatest disrespect and he will not be disrespected." Lol, is that poor soul Austrian? (There are sooo many memes about this here in Austria! They usually are titled "Tell me you're Austrian without telling me you're Austrian" and then it's someone with insanely many titles or absolutely stupid things with titles. For example doorbells on the outside of an apartment complex. There are no names, they are simply titled (ha) "Top 1" or "Top 2" and so forth. And then there is one with a small sticker in front of it so it reads " Dr. Top 5" xDD)

"This… wasn’t right. The first of the doors would lead him… Maybe that wasn’t the first of the doors. But it, it was, it was the first door. But that would mean… No, he, he was right, he was certain, he had factored in all the timings. This didn’t make sense." This has strong "My code isn't working... I have no idea why - My code is working... I have no idea why" vibes XD

That statement doesn't do much to me. Then again, I'm not an academic. My sister who has a PhD however says she totally feels this one.

JON: "Well, you’re a watcher, Martin. You worked for the Institute, you read statements. The Eye is… fond of you." This is super interesting. Cause this means, not every watcher out there is evil or a bad person like Jude, or Simon... So for the post-change-world this would be super interesting. (Oliver also seems chill to me, that's why I like him so much.)

MARTIN: "But I’m not an avatar." JON: [Heated] "Avatar isn’t a thing, Martin! It’s not– It’s just a word. A word used by… fools like Smirke to try and sort everything into neat little boxes, to reduce the messy spray of human fear into a checklist: Human, avatar, monster, victim." Love that we get this conversation, about how the world works, in a domain where this was the theme.

JON: "If you’re sure." MARTIN: "… I’m sure I love you." [FOOTSTEPS] JON: "I love you too." [FABRIC RUSTLES] Those two <3 (Ha! Better luck next time, Helen!!)

@a-mag-a-day

[the-portrait-of-seraph]

June's Review...

I completely forgot about this, please forgive me

Lolita: Nabokov, Vladmir

A great book in the way it's written! I greatly admire Nabokov's style and prose and I think it's pretty hardcore that he translated his own book (Lolita) into Russian. But does that make it Russian or European literature???

Humbert is the only unreliable narrator I don't like, I wonder why. Maybe it's because he was pining after a freaking twelve year-old? I know that this books gets a lot of hate for its depiction of pedophilia, but Nabokov had stated that this book was written for the opposite intention, to show the disgusting nature of pedophilia and even had specific instructions for the book's cover, which many did not listen to-

It's an interesting book to say the least, the characters, the plot, and even the setting really plays into Nabokov's masterpiece.

The Grapes of Wrath: Steinbeck, John

Ugh, I love this book!!!! The Grapes of Wrath is oftentimes considered Steinbeck's greatest work (I can refute that lol) and for good reason. The story is about the Joad family, who travel to California in hopes of a better life, but when they get there, life isn't all that it seems, and Tom Joad finds himself caught up in a worker's revolt.

Honestly, the stars of the show were the Ruthie and Willie interactions. They're so cute haha, especially when they see a flushing toilet and thought they broke it-

Rose of Sharon,,, she's so lovely. I felt so bad for her and her baby, and she was so excited too.

Connie really just left her because the responsibility was too much? Ran away and began studying hard to become the president of the U.S. huh?

There's a lot to unpack, but I am such a horrible explainer. It's not only the Joads, but the Reverend and the revolt also have so much more depth and allegory in them.

The Idiot: Dostoevsky, Fyodor

Myshkin,,,, I loveeee youuuuuu. No but seriously, I loved Myshkin throughout this whole book, he was the light in the dark dingy world of 19th century Russia. Truly a holy fool.

There was so much happening in this story??? The Rogozhin/Nastasya/Myshkin drama, the Aglaya/Myshkin development, the Rogozhin/Myshkin rivalry???? How Myshkin vehemently denounces Catholicism? The Rogozhin/Nastasya escape? Nastasya's death??? It will be hard to keep up with, but I promise you, the Idiot is so good.

Man, I love Nastasya Fillipovna. Fuck Trotsky though, he literally molested Nastasya throughout her time as his ward, that's not cool. And how Nastasya just burns a hundred thousand roubles, has two men wrapped around her finger, and ends up with neither of them? Gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss!!!

Sonya and Raskolnikov wanted to be everything that Nastasya and Myshkin were/j (Take a shot everytime Hyeji says Nastasya). Myshkin had pure intentions and saw the good in Nastasya/wanted to help her, and Nastasya absolutely lost it fr.

First Love: Turgenev, Ivan

I liked this one! First Love tells the story of Vladmir Petrovich and his love for his next door neighbor, Zinaida. However, Zinaida is aware of her good looks (as she should!!!) and has a lot of men vying for her hand, Petrovich being only one of them. She goes on to play her suitors against each other, while Petrovich is not aware of his real rival (spoiler, it's his dad).

Turgenev describes love as a summer torrent that changes a person once it's over, and he was damn right. As much as I wanted to root for Petrovich, I was also hoping for some sort of tragedy to act as character development.

It's very short, so you could read it in one sitting! I highly recommend it, if you like the feeling of hand sanitizer on half-healed cuts.

Poems of James Joyce and the Exiles

Okayyy, I see you Joyce!!!! I've only really considered James Joyce as an author, so reading his love poetry and only play really paints him in a new light!

Ugh, his poetry describes everything that I've ever felt about every person I've loved. I don't know if it's a lot, but I'm digressing. And his play??? Gorgeous, but sort of messed up? You have Robert and Bertha, the unmarried couple with their son Archie; they return from Rome to Ireland, to run into Richard, Bertha's ex and Beatrice, Robert's ex. Harmful hijinks ensue. I know that this play wasn't as successful as his other works, but I really liked it.

In Search of Lost Time: Proust, Marcel

I didn't not enjoy this as much as I thought I would. That doesn't mean I hated it!!!! I do admire Proustian writing style, but there wasn't that sort of compelling force that wanted me to keep turning the page. It certainly was interesting, I have a love and hate relationship with this series though haha.

June was not my month, too many things to do and now its my summer break!!! Going to try and be more active here now :)

[cyclone-rachel]

thoughts on The Boys, season 3

Episode 7

okay, penultimate episode time!

“this series deals with sensitive issues, including death by suicide and contains scenes that could be sexual, graphic, or taboo in nature. No living people or animals were harmed or coerced. Viewer discretion is strongly advised.”

Well geez, where was this warning for the rest of the show up to now?

strong quotations around “rehab”

they think Homelander dumped her?

that certainly looks like a mistake

which is what?

he’s not wrong

oh my god

this scene is wild

so he actually has powers here?

fucker

get away from her!!!

ooooooh

You stepped on one of them, Homelander

She’d be fine losing her powers if it meant getting the fuck away from you

ew. ew. ew.

you also probably imagined having kids with the literal nazi

Are you sure?

you’re a fucking creeper and I hate you

what are the other two?

I love Annie and Kimiko so much

I don’t know if that’s as easy as it sounds

Basically, yes

“Aside from the two of us, I guess.”

no good ever comes from a place like this

is he a brony

okay I guess not

ERIC BAUZA? ONE OF MY FAVES ERIC BAUZA? NICE

this is weirder than that time the Deep hallucinated his gills talking to him

That’s gross

oh shit what was that

Ah, Butcher’s in his mind-prison

He sure says some wild shit

yeah so this dude is terrifying actually

And what do you care about the Lord?

Everyone’s a mess here.

Damn, Annie

that doesn’t mean he isn’t worth saving

You just lost them, and you were happy about it

I love her so much

I agree with Hughie here, man.

Give her some credit.

do you want to have a threesome with her and an octopus?

oh my GOD that was a JOKE

the deep: I can excuse sexual assault but I draw the line at sea creature misgendering

Hey, he offered to share.

who’s Dave Eggers

oh geez what is this

“Black Sheep Noir”, I love it

YIKES

YIKES. YIKES. YIKES.

young Butcher is perfect, like in terms of acting

yeah you can see exactly where he got his life philosophy from

The guys from the Believe conference?

Not a good combination

And clearly Hughie doesn’t want to be a soldier

fuck you, Homelander

Liar, lying liar

do you think the media caught that?

thanks, Vic

Homelander you weirdo

Again, thank you, Vic

Are you sure he’s going to be the president?

But you’re gonna fuck anyway probably

What’s her favor?

Oh, he’s okay.

Ashley, putting the “gaslight” in “gaslight gatekeep girlboss”

what in the goddamn fuck

this is just like those weird memes about one direction I think

Your wife’s gonna find out now

sorry what

Kimiko, honey

he’d always dance with you

Do you really think that would work?

are we going to see what it says

yes! yes! yes!

I love them so much

My good brave girl

Annie do you know what you’re doing

oh dear

why is he getting this narrated to him?

OH NO

ouch

So that’s what really happened

thank you, MM

I’m glad she’s not okay with it

dude. he has Starlight in his home right now

How do you know that?

oh noooooo

Annie get out of there girl

fucking asshole

love you, Annie

lots of windchimes

You don’t sound chill

He’s not going to put on underwear?

Aww, Hughie admitting Butcher is his friend

and now I’m hoping for a Hughie and Kimiko conversation

Aw, Butcher no

this certainly isn’t foreshadowing anything at all

oh that went THROUGH his eye

ouch

the green light for what?

what’s impossible?

the John Walker Special right there, everyone

is Butcher okay

so like in Uglies

He’s not gonna tell him

Oh no

how long do you have?

thank you, Annie

Well, shit

You’re so gross

DAD? HE’S A FATHER? HE’S HOMELANDER’S FATHER?

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

Last Life session 6 out of context

transcript under the cut

Martyn: If you wanna try and burn snow, I'm very happy to watch.

...

Scott: You got me down to two hearts and then I hit a wall and just exploded.

...

Martyn: PARKOOOOOOUR! Nailed it.

...

Tango: *sniffing noises* Bdubs: What? Tango: *more sniffing noises* Bdubs: WHAT? Tango: *even more sniffing noises* Bdubs: Oh, he's sniffin' on me.

...

Jimmy: Don't exile me again, please.

...

Scott: Are we ready for a day of girlboss, gaslight, and gatekeeping?

...

Lizzie: Oh.

...

Scott: I already came out, it was a few years ago Pearl, it was a hard time.

...

*Grian, Martyn, Jimmy, and Mumbo making "ohhhh" noises*

...

Scott: I've accepted the loss.

...

*creepy music suddenly cuts off* Scar: That's the ambience.

...

Martyn: HAHA! You got 'lotl-ed!

...

Scott: The only thing that can kill me are mobs or my own stupidity.

...

Scar, out of breath: Welcome to Magical Mountain, are you here for enchants?

...

Martyn: They hug the butt and they puff out the chest. They make us all look... THICC.

...

Bdubs: WHOAAHAHA! Hey, Mumbo.

...

Lizzie: If I'm not mistaken, that is the first sign of the apocalypse.

...

*Jimmy threateningly moves around Grian while crouching*

...

Martyn: It just looks like a really really frustrated Goomba, I'm not gonna lie.

...

*Impulse and Grian making various noises as if they're about to speak* Grian, laughing: GO GO GO GO GO!

...

*Jimmy screaming in the background* Martyn: You've got Francois and Liam and Geoffrey and Simon and then there's Philip and then there's also John Third the Fourth, which is very confusing.

...

Cleo: Have fun storming the castle. Scott: I will!

...

Bdubs: Start the clock. I fell!

...

Martyn: Don't say anything, you'll be fine. Jimmy: *gasps* OH my gosh! Martyn: Awww. You're lucky he had eyes for me.

...

Skizz: Can we put a balloon on Bdubs or something?

...

Mumbo: *gasp, high pitched* Oooohhhh! Bdubs: I got- I got some. Mumbo, even more high pitched: OOOOOHHHH!

...

Jimmy, in a Mario voice: Lets-a go!

...

Lizzie, unconvincingly: Wh- Who told you that? A wither skull? What's that? I've never heard of such a thing!

...

Grian, snickering: You guys really do look like a boyband.

...

Mumbo: This is interesting, this is an interesting... *pause* Mumbo: ...this is interesting.

...

Martyn: A LOVE crystal.

...

Skizz: Shoved a life down his throat!

...

Scott: You know I love a back door, Martyn.

...

Cleo: It's purge night, guys.

...

Skizz: Tango! Tango: I AM GONNA SLAY HIS FACE OH MY GO- WHERE IS HE?!!??!?!

...

Scott: Go in the water. Jimmy: I think I have- I don't- Scott: Go in the water. Go IN the water. Jimmy: I lost my water. Scott: Jimmy, go IN the water! Jimmy: How have I lost my water?! Scott: Oh. My. God.

...

Tango: It's like on TWO for me and he's like "I'm not the boogeyman." *overlapping this, Etho mutes his mic and cries*

...

Ren: Dang it! Mumbo, overlapping: What we doing here? *pause* Mumbo: Awwhhh! Ren: What ARE we doing here?

...

Martyn: Where's the bomb set? Tell me, I'm still in here. Scar: YOU-! YOU-! Martyn: Where's the bomb set?! WHERE'S THE BOMB SET?! Scar: WHERE'D YOU COME FROM MARTYN OH MY GOD

...

Lizzie: How am I gonna repopulate the entire wolf species with just one wolf?

...

Scott: Martyn, did you put a sword in there and just have another sword?

...

Tango: If I lose one more, you're done for!

...

Joel: In the future, give me diamonds.

...

Mumbo: Did you bear witness to what just happened? Scott: Ah. I fell.

...

Tango: *angry heavy breathing noises* Bdubs: I'M SORRY!

...

Scar: That's scary. That- That's just right in my face.

...

Mumbo, indignant: BdoubleO!

...

Tango: *more angry heavy breathing noises*

...

Joel: Stop fishing me. Please stop mocking me, I have no friends.

...

Mumbo: I have no friends.

...

Scott: I have no friends, Ren! My base burnt down! I don't know what you want!

...

Etho, laughing quietly: Oh man, I'm dead.

...

Tango: CHICKEN IN YOUR FACE! CHICKEN IN YOUR FACE! Bdubs: I HATE IT!

...

Lizzie: We hid it in the deepest darkest dungeon that nobody knows about. But somehow, Grian and Impulse knew about it and they found it pretty quickly. Scott: Ah.

...

Scar: Skizz! D'you wanna- D'you wanna cook some s'mores? Skizz: No.

...

Mumbo: He's quite talented, actually. He is quite talented, he is. And handsome as well.

...

Jimmy: You're a menace to society, Mumbo!

...

Tango: There's only one butt here and it's his, it's gonna be dead.

...

Cleo: I asked Pearl if she wanted to go on a heist with me. Or a murder. Depends on how we're feeling, really.

...

Scott: *hits Impulse into a pit* Bye. Impulse: Wha- Hey! WHAT?! *Impulse dies* Scott: Well, that works.

...

Tango: Harness the rage! Etho: OHH, I FEEL IT! I FEEL IT! I FEEL IT! Bdubs: Wha- Hey! What did I do?! Etho: *deep growl*

...

Martyn, with the echo sound effect: "I'm deep in thought. Nobody really knows what's going on. Neither do I. And one day, this lot will leave me alone."

...

Scott: I don't know what he was thinking about, but he was thinking about IT.

...

Tango: It's like a Formula 1 pit stop crew, y'know?

...

*Grian holds up his spyglass to look directly into the camera*

...

*ominous music playing* Tango: Yesss. Etho: This feels very good to me. This is very natural. Tango: This is fantastic!

...

Lizzie: There's no such thing as an innocent piece of dirt on this server, Jimmy! You should know that by now!

...

Mumbo: Not really. *pause, Scar walks away sadly* Mumbo: *snickers* Scott: Oh.

...

Martyn: I don't care 'bout no reds! I'll fight a red! I'll fight a red! Hold me back! Mumbo, overlapping: You sure 'bout that? YOU SURE 'BOUT THAT? Martyn, overlapping: Hold me back! Hold me back! Jimmy, overlapping: I'm holding him back, I'm holding him back. Mumbo, overlapping: Oh yeah no this is bad.

...

Scott: Cuz, you know... *pause* Moss.

...

Scar, whispering: I have no idea how to kill people.

...

*Grian, Impulse, and Joel all screaming*

Grian: OH MY GOD! Impulse, overlapping: WHAT?! Joel, overlapping: OH MY GOSH!

...

Tango, singsong: Bdubs gonna diiiie, Bdubs gonna diiiie!

...

*a puppy chases after Bdubs*

...

Jimmy: Who are... the boys?

...

Ren: Excuse me, reds? Can we help you? *pause* Joel: Uh, yes. Give us diamonds.

...

Scott: Tango, what's happening? Tango: I've no idea.

...

Grian: It was stolen from me by you. Impulse, overlapping: I know, yeah, you were just getting it back. Grian: By YOU! *pause* Impulse, slightly sheepish: Yeeaaah...

...

Tango, high pitched: I hear voiceees!

...

*Jimmy stares in silence at Martyn, who turns and walks away from him without saying a word*

...

Lizzie: I've had a very bad day- Oh, Dragon!

...

Grian: WE JUST WITNESSED A MURDER!

...

Tango: Where's his house? Skizz: I dunno. Tango: I've no idea.

...

Impulse: WHY YOU GOTTA KEEP DOING ME LIKE THIS?!

...

Scott: Want some carrots? Scar: I'm gonna go- I'm gonna go cry.

...

Etho: I will give you Tango. Tango: WAIT, WHAT?!

...

Impulse: You wanted a campfire story, right? Now we have one.

...

Martyn: Okay, let's do it. Let's go blow up my tower. Tango: Woohoo!

...

Scott: Why are you the way that you are?! Stop it, Joel!

...

*Grian zooms in on Etho with the spyglass, who then creeps closer to him and gives him a fright*

...

Scott: IMPULSE, JUST DIE, MAN!

...

Lizzie: You know, I've always had a thing for... red names. Bad boys. Joel: Heh... Okay, um... Scar: That's awkward.

...

Scott: Oh my goodness, so fluff.

...

Tango: There was a bit of rage today! A bit! JUST A BIT!

[whiskehorange]

Domestic headcannons for the man, John and doom head?

The Man

Annoying. He's fucking annoying

He's relatively up to date with society and I 100% believe that he not only have social media but especially TikTok and Reddit. He looks like he uses reddit deviously

Anyways, despite what you might think, he's a homebody and would like to keep it that way. He doesn't like going out when he doesn't need to and thinks the same about you. Why you always going out all the damn time? Stay home with him

He's protective and obsessive, of course, and only really wants you home so that he could have you all to himself. If he has to go out he will, but he'll complain the entire time

The house is relatively quiet as well, only him being on his phone for the day with you laying by his side. Deep down he's a sucker for watching movies and shows with you though, he's just picky

Very much not girlboss

Gaslight and gatekeep though

Cannot cook and will not learn. He gets out of it every time saying that he'll watch and learn from you but he never does, in one ear and out the other

Same thing with cleaning, he just doesn't do it and when he does he doesn't do it right. Why the fuck are you even dating him? I mean, if the shoe fits, wear it I guess. Make him do something for the love of God

John

He's quiet and so is his life outside of that. It's comfy out there in the woods but sometimes the eerie silence can get to you if you don't occupy yourself

Uhm.. how do I put this? John is a family man but... it's just not in the ways we think, alright? He'll more than certainly take care of you and provide for you but seems very absent from the home in general

A lot of his time is spend outside and even maintaining the property throughout the day. Walking the grounds and removing anything that isn't supposed to be there, if you know what I mean. It would mean a lot if you did so with him though!

He's equally as unsettling as the silence too, but it's a little cute. You can catch him staring at you from in the yard at almost anytime of day. Other than that he's out and on his way

The two of you eventually manage to get decent enough cell service for him to have a phone, so expect really shitty accidental pictures and some high quality ones of scenery or foliage that he thinks you might enjoy

Sets gifts for you either on the porch or on your nightstand for you to wake up to constantly, how sweet

Doom Head

Domestic is not the right word for Doom Head. Off-duty is

There's also no way to write for this man in a positive light, have you seen him? Look at him and tell me he has even a single nice word to say? He's more girlboss than The Man though...

He's not up for the whole domestic life either, but you know it's what he needs. It's rare for him to really get the chance to relax formally when he's home anyways, but he'll admit you add a liiiitttle light to his life

You get compliments, sure! But they're not worded very nicely! He gives you a hard time and nags a lot, but you simply being allowed over is many times is a privilege on it's own, so don't push it

Doesn't really take you on nice dates very often or really ever, but will toss you a handful of cash if he really wants to get you out of his hair for the day. Go use it for whatever the fuck you want but just bring a case of beer back on your way home

Physical attention is scarce too, but when he does give you the half assed hug and forceful kiss it'll mean something. I mean half of his kisses tastes like beer and tobacco but you settled for this, so don't look at me with a scrunched nose

He's protective of you too, but it shows much differently than you might expect. He's not going to be your bodyguard 24/7 and go out with you on shopping trips or days out, but you'll have enough markings from him for people to get the point

Lester

Oh yeah, house wife Lester at your service

God, he's the most hillbilly you could get but he sure does love smothering you in everything he's got to offer. Do you know how long it's been since he's had someone who isn't a stranger not be mean to him or make fun of him? Just let him give you all of the praise and attention awkwardly as he can

Honestly, I can see the two of you starting a little farm that you tend to everyday. Lester has no problem with the dirt and you enjoy making it bright and colorful with different growing fruits, veggies, and flowers. Occasionally having to refill holes Jonesy's dug and buried something in

You get a lot of gifts from Lester as well, especially things that are specifically shiny and not as dirty that he finds while he's out. He'll come strutting over to you, smile plastered on his face as he hands you a respectively clean racoon bone. Sweet, just another one to add to the collection you involuntarily started

He loves making you laugh and going on trips with you. Anywhere you want to go is on him, just hop in the truck with him and Jonesy and he'll take you somewhere

When it comes it comes to his brothers, specifically Bo, he takes you side often when he's being negative or just rude. Lester isn't one for arguing, giving that he grew up with Bo and knows it's useless to do so with him but he doesn't like when it's about you or directed to you unintentionally

Picnics all the time. Doubt he even has his own dinner table anyways. Guess you'll just eat on the floor

[stina-is-a-punk-rocker]

jacqueline wilson’s ‘love lessons’

tw: abuse, pedophilia, characters making Bad Decisions, long unnecessary spiel about my childhood like I’m running a recipe blog

It’s funny how loads of the authors who helped shaped me into the vaguely humanoid being I am today have names beginning with the letter ‘J’; Judy Blume, Jeff Kinney, John Green, J.K. Rowling (yikes, I know) … and Jacqueline Wilson.

I’ve never owned a Jacqueline Wilson book of my own; they were always borrowed from a friend, or from a friend of a friend, or from a friend of a cousin- you get the gist. Her books, for me, come with an entire aesthetic: something reminiscent of yard sales, and reading under the covers with a flashlight, and being lulled into a false sense of security by the deceptively innocent Nick Sharratt illustration on the cover until someone’s best friend gets mowed over.

So I knew what I was getting into when I picked up Love Lessons. I knew this was going to be Fucked Up; and boy, was I right.

(Here’s the part where I warn you about spoilers.)

From an abusive dad to creepy child predator teachers to slut-shaming and victim blaming, this book has it all.

The main character is Prudence ‘Prue’ King, who is homeschooled at the beginning of the book, along with her sister, Grace. Their parents remain rooted in the early twentieth century, and are very strict about- well, everything. No TV, no computers, not a single mobile phone in the house; their clothing worse than the orphans’ from Annie; and their father remains distinctly distrustful of modern institutions like the school and the hospital; and so on, and so forth.

Daddy King suffers a stroke, and has to be taken to the hospital. Meanwhile, Mrs. King (a floppy, spineless woman who lives in fear and awe of her, frankly horrid, husband) sends the girls to school, behind the then invalid Mr. King’s back. Cue Prue and Grace being the freakshows of the school, with their strange clothing and overbearing mother.

Grace manages to make friends, but Prue remains alone. The kids are dicks, the teachers are dicks… well, all of them but one. And that’s the art teacher, Mr. Raxberry (I just couldn’t get over that name; it seems like something you’d name a mythical plant from Pixie Hollow or some shit. I’m assuming it isn’t an actual name, since the spelling & grammar check on my computer doesn’t seem to recognize it), or Rax, as he’s called.

Oh, yeah; Prudence’s favorite subject in school is art, and she’s a whiz at it. This is relevant, because reasons.

And here’s where stuff gets murky. Prue develops a crush on Rax- which is perfectly normal. I’m definitely no stranger to it; I’ve had crushes on my teachers, my mum admitted she used to think one of her professors was cute. And yeah, as I grew older, I grew out of those crushes and now have a markedly more refined taste in men (unless he’s 5’ 7’’, born in ’97 and named Bang Chan, I don’t want him); and my mum married my dad, so I’m assuming she did, too. Admittedly, now that my dad teaches at a university, it’s icky to think that there might be students who have crushes on him- but I digress.

My point is, loads of us have liked our teachers. But I doubt the majority of us have acted on it.

And Prue actively showing her interest in Rax isn’t the worst part. That’s a spot reserved for Rax reciprocating her feelings.

Guess Ezra Fitz and Ms. Grundy (yes, I watched Riverdale; please don’t cancel me) have a new addition to the Creep Club.

The age of consent in the UK is 16, if I’m not mistaken. Prue is 14. She’s just barely become a teenager, and she’s being preyed upon.

Because that is what Rax is. He’s a predator; he preys upon this vulnerable girl who’s never been in a relationship before- hell, she’s never even had friends- her father’s abusive, so she obviously doesn’t have the best experience when it comes to men- she’s unpopular at school, with the students and staff alike- and he lures her in. I don’t care how bloody nice he is to Sarah, or what a good dad he is (well, he’s really not, seeing as he cheated on the mother of his children WITH A BLOODY FOURTEEN-YEAR-OLD CHILD)- the guy’s a fucking pedophile.

I was staunchly stuck at a yellow light with him; like, sure, maybe Prue thinks he’s flirting with her- maybe she’s looking at this all wrong, she doesn’t know how relationships work- see, he drew a picture of Sarah, too, in his secret notebook- Prue’s just reading into this too much- up until he says he loves her.

Dude. Humbert fucking Humbert. She’s fourteen, for Christ’s sake, and you’re married. You have two children. She’s a child. She’s probably closer to your son’s age than she is to yours.

(This is the part where I bury my head in my pillow. And scream. Extensively, and with passion.)

The book does make some genuinely good commentary on slut-shaming and victim blaming and abusive parenting. And on one hand, I can see why so many people find issue with the romanticization of the when I kissed the teacher trope- but I can defend it, too.

The book is in Prue’s perspective. She thinks she’s in love with Rax, so obviously, she’s not going to throw in some valuable moral at the end- because she’s too young and inexperienced to think otherwise. And sadly, there are loads of instances of child abuse that go unreported because the victims just don’t know better.

What I have issue with is how the school dealt with it, ultimately. Prudence, a child, has to deal with the consequences of the actions of a literal child predator. Sure, Rax ‘clears his name’ by cooking up some bullshit story about how it was only a crush and he didn’t encourage it, but you’d think other adults would know better and, oh, I dunno- dig deeper into it, instead of blaming it on a child?

“She says you told Mr. Raxberry you loved him and he held you in his arms and fondled you.”

Which Prudence denies, because, again, she doesn’t know better. She then goes on to say that they did nothing wrong. To which the adult speaking to her, in this case, the principal, Miss Wilmott, goes on to say:

“I’m not sure that’s entirely true… I feel that there are some aspects of your friendship that could be considered inappropriate.”

FYI, lady, he kissed her- multiple times (not that kissing her once makes him any more redeemable), and told her he loved her, and admitted to fantasizing about running away with her and leaving his family behind. Fun fact: do you know Prudence is underage?

You’d think that Miss Wilmott would maybe give this whole fiasco a favorable ending, but it turns out she listens to school gossip;

“I haven’t been at all happy with your attitude. You don’t seem to understand how to behave in school. I’ve heard tales of unsuitable underwear and then a silly romance with one of the boys in your class. I feel that in the space of a few short weeks you’ve made rather a bad name for yourself… I don’t know whether you intend to be deliberately insolent but you certainly come across as an unpleasantly opinionated and arrogant girl… I can’t help feeling that you’ll be much better off elsewhere. I shall try hard to engineer a suitable transfer to another school.”

And then she comes out with this gem:

“If you won’t leave, then I shall have to ensure that Mr. Raxberry finds another position.”

“No, you can’t do that! He’s a brilliant teacher.”

“You should have thought of that before you started acting in this ridiculous and precocious manner. If I were another kind of headteacher, I would have Mr. Raxberry instantly suspended. There could even be a court case. He would not only lose his job, he could find himself in very serious trouble. Did you ever stop to think about that?”

Girlboss, gaslight and gatekeep. The fucking trifecta.

Also, by ‘another kind of headteacher’, does she mean the kind of headteacher WHO DOESN’T LET CHILD PREDATORS ROAM FREELY WITHIN THEIR HALLS?

This bitch is out here blaming a child, a literal child, for the crimes of an adult man.

The only time Prue seems aware of the fact that Mr. Raxberry is actually a very shit person is her immediate thoughts that follow after she tells Miss Wilmott she’ll take the fall;

I so wanted to save darling Rax- and yet why hadn’t he wanted to save me? Had he told Miss Wilmott it was all my fault, that I’d got a ridiculous crush on him, that I’d made ludicrous advances to him? … I wanted to tell this horrible, patronizing woman how hungrily he’d kissed me, but I couldn’t do it. I loved him. I had to help him.

NO, SWEETHEART; YOU MOST DEFINITELY DO NOT.

And maybe I’m going overboard with all these excerpts, but here’s what Rax has to tell Prue, after school, following her expulsion:

“I let her think the worst of you, the best of me, just to save my skin. I said it was ridiculous talking about a love affair between us. I said you simply had a crush on me, and that I was just trying to be kind… You were brave enough to stand up to me and force me to acknowledge the truth… I love you… That’s why I had to take a risk and see you this one last time. I didn’t want you to think I didn’t care… Every night when I close my eyes, I’ll think of us together in this car and how badly I wanted to drive off with you. I’ll imagine us walking hand in hand at the water’s edge… I wish I wasn’t such a coward.”

(I burrow into the pillow further. I’m trying to suffocate myself.)

And that’s where I think Wilson went wrong. Sure, Prudence getting expelled for something that was completely out of her hands is unfair, and horrible, but it’s real. That shit can happen.

What’s bad is showing Rax in a positive light after all that. If only Wilson had written Rax to not be the Romeo he thinks he is. Make him ignore Prudence, throw her under the bus in front of her face, instead of this star-crossed lovers bullshit it’s made out to be. Show your younger audience that Rax is not a good man. I’ve got a little over two weeks left for my twentieth; I can see why this is unacceptable. But I was a little younger than Prue when I watched Pretty Little Liars, and my only gripe with Aria dating Ezra was that Noel Kahn was so much cuter.

It shows when you scroll down the Goodreads reviews; you’ve got adults giving it one or two stars, and teenagers giving it four or five, with their biggest complaints being, “but Toby was cuter!!!”

Other non-pedophilia related complaints regarding the book include: Prudence being unlikable- which I didn’t really notice, considering she reacted to some people way better than I would’ve, even at 19 (which probably says a lot more about me than it does about Prue, but oh well). Still, Prudence obviously isn’t the most prudent of people- and again, she’s fourteen. Look me in eye and tell me you weren’t an arsehole at that age (unless you’re fourteen now, in which case, I assure you that you’ll look back on yourself someday and go ‘wtf was I thinking’). Bringing up Toby’s dyslexia in an argument was low, though.

There were people who thought the Kings’ almost-Amish lifestyle was exaggerated and unrealistic, but I assure you, it may very well be real. There are 8 billion people on the world- it’s fair to assume that several of them are complete weirdos.

Grace was a sweet character, and I adored her with every fiber of my being. As were her friends Iggy and Figgy. Honestly, I would’ve loved a book about Iggy, Figgy and Piggy’s (mis)adventures too.

[monstress]

thoughts on cowboy bebop 2021 under the cut

my expectations were LOW so like...the show isn't bad but it wasn't great either

cons:

the pacing is sooo slow why did they need to pad an original 20 min eps series to 40-60 mins??? after eps one, i played this in 1.25x speed and turned my brain off and it immediately became more watchable

speaking of padding, i was excited for more Julia backstory but not like THIS......ma'am im so sorry but you'll always be a bad bitch who had her own mysterious adventure outrunning the syndicate in my mind instead of gaslight gatekeep girlbossing your way to the top. spike was right...JULIA THIS ISN”T YOU!!!!

after the first eps, i do ffw every syndicate scene which isn't great since it covers half the runtime. i think what’s great abt the original is that much of the shadowy organization - its characters, relationships, and influence is left to the viewer’s imagination so like demystifying them diminishes their intimidation

the sexytumblrman-ification of vicious. why........

the writing is rough as hell and i deeply admire the few actors who could pull it off....

......which leads to the julia and vicious characters. oof wow. what was casting thinking. switch them with asimov and katerina’s actors and i’d might actually watch their Marriage Story b-plot

that fetishizing comment to jet like i cringed so hard but at least it had a cute moment of spike and jet laughing abt it afterwards but we could do without that

i know they changed gren’s plot bc the writers might want to avoid the bury your gays trope but i wish they were more essential to the plot and had more to do

oof i wished this adaptation was done by apple tv or amazon prime like netflix is cheap as hell for scrimping on the production budget for a show where it is all abt world-building and ~vibes

and the vibes were OFF...like choose a tone! choose a genre! what are u trying to say here! what is permeating and unsaid in every eps!

the Ed reveal...god that didn't translate well to live action....i was also like...who the hell is this pale child 😭 not this show going 2 for 2 on casting white ppl for lead roles originally of poc

THE ENDING??? et tu, julia? the last 10 mins sours the entire show mashallah what a disservice to spike, julia and vicious and abt how tethering yourself to ghosts while trying to survive in capitalist isolation will ultimately undo you

pros:

the music??? new Seatbelts???? yoko kanno i owe you my life

EIN....majorly underused but a delight everytime onscreen

sorry to my mans john cho but mustafa shakir is carryingggg this show i mean GET this man booked in every project like i’ve been saying since luke cage honest god he deserves it

john cho is great i like him he makes me smile like we as a society are overdue of him gracing the screen as THE sexy leading man (rip abc selfie...)

faye is gay and i knowww it’s because they had the mechanic substitute gren since they had so many changes to their character but the moment where she gets all emotional since it taps into something she hasn’t realized or FORGOTTEN abt herself like idk if im reading too much into it but i shall

when the bebop team bicker, banter, then work together...peace and love and friendship on earth and beyond 😇❤️

they actually bought the loofah on a stick T T the callback made me laugh and broke my heart at the same time

the flashback scene in eps 9...ok maybe i DO allow some syndicate scenes and julia & vicious can actually hv chemistry! just not with each other :/ 

eps 7 is the best eps. i did like the small alteration in faye’s backstory and u can’t play the scene of faye watching that tape of herself and not have me cry. that scene in particular is a standout it’s like the first time the show actually breathes and hv a quiet moment - letting the actors do their thing and hv the viewer emphatize with their reactions (gonna ignore the irony that the best part of this show is when there’s no dialogue slgsklgkslgkl)

tl;dr: not a good show, you can skip this even if ur not a fan. it’s fine and not as bad as ppl make it out to be but watching the og is a much better use of ur time.

[anonil88]

TFATWS SEASON 1 FINALE Liveblog

SPOILERS AHEAD.

Lots of action starting from jumping, i get that its necessary but some of it seems or feeld too long and drawn out.

I love Sam's winged captain America suit....mostly, that chin strap to ear cover thing looks weird to me outside of the comic books.

Does it even have a function? 🤨🤨🤨

Disney/Marvel is smart for during these flying and action scenes keeping the camera moving constantly because the eyes are less likely to pick up on what is real.

"MORGENTHAU!" Here comes great value super soldier ladies, gents, and those of the many varying gender identities......JOHN WALKER.

(Insert welcome to Walmart sound)

Him and his janky ass homemade shield that looks like a damn toy in this fight.

She said i don't give two flying fucks about you or your lil friend dude. RIP or whatever lmfao.

They are really jumping John like he's some guy off the street that stepped on their shoes.

Yay Bucky got to be the hero!!! And now he's back to kicking people in the chest. These flag smasgers lack fighting skills, all brawn and instinct with no skill. They keep going for Bucky' left arm not the right.

I really like that if you have closed captions on everytime Sam speaks it says Captain America. :)

Yea you bouta get ya ass beat mr. helicopter soldier.

Very smart planning Sam. 👏 👏

John might kill Karli but I want him to get his ass beat so badly.

Ayy nice kick girl nice kick.

If you really want to be a hero save these people.

Ayy here we.....go?

Oh it's Sam! When the hell did jet packs get strong enough to hold up an armored vehicle with people in it and a man in a full vibranium suit? Comic logic i guess haha.

Let me guess all this smoke is Sharon as the power brokers doing? Oh no maybe not.

They really forgot the power broker is looking for them in all of this.

We were right, she is the power broker that was obvious though.

Ah fuck she, Karli, shot Sharon no!

I hope Sam can get through to her even though his ass really can't fight at all.

I never thought John would be right about all three of them fighting on the same team but here we are.

Can John not make jokes...ever again....

Oh she wants a fight and he won't give it to her and that makes her so angry. Sharon to save the day but also Karli was just a very angry young person who the world fucked over so many times she thought anger was not only her purpose but her solution.

Aw Sam he actually cared about her though and shows up with her in his arms kid of like an angel.

Oh he is calling the politicians out too, in front of the press. Oh?

I wonder how the people will perceive him not as Sam, but as Captain America and Falcon for speaking his truth. He is a black man being the middle ground and mediator between those in power and the people.

Yea I really hate the goggles connected to the neck gaiter.

Bucky has a new Cap for a bestfriend 😭

Also, Bucky really loves being in the company of criminals i swear.

That movement is strong as hell now lol

Oh shit who is this old man? He just killed them all lmfao.

Ayyy the raft!

Oh that was Zemo's henchman lmfao Zemo planned it lmfao.

Time for US Agent to be shield's new personal attack dog.

Sigh Buck.... he has to let go of his old man friend. This older man does deserve closure and he will still have the girl to help him through his emotions. She didn't look upset at Bucky though which is good. No grudges just releasing the past.

Isaiah looks really good and just confident now maybe it is the a haircut. Awwww Isaiah and his grandson at the cap exhibit awwww they gave him a statue. This is making me tear up not gonna lie. Oof this man deserved and deserves so much better than how they treated him. Sam a real one for this.

Ay back in Louisiana!

Bucky looks mighty comfortable in this town full of black people...playing with the kids....helping out during the boil *sips tea* mighty comfortable ☕

Aw the change of the title 😭

Captain America and The Winter Soldier. I.E my captain America is black.

Post credit scene: THATS RIGHT MY BAD BIH AGENT SHARON CARTER BY DAY AND UNDERGROUND CRIME LORD BY NIGHT. "girlboss gatekeep and gaslight" lmfao

Overall thoughts: First i will start with my thoughts on the finale the first half with all the action was just okay in my opinion. I did not have many expectations high or low, but it was lacking something in all the action. Something that most of the other fight scenes had and have had in the MCU. I don't know what that spark is though (could be neat being tired) but it still felt underwhelming. Even Sam's speech was not the heroic candor or bold speech i expected. His talk with Isaiah was better imo. The second half of this episode really stood out for me though and had some very touching moments. Overall for the season, I really liked this show more than I thought I would and I wonder if we will see a season 2 instead of a movie spin off. Honestly from what I've heard from others that might be better if Disney/Marvel is going the route of deep dive with all of their characters. Bucky still has some things to work through but for now he is good and Sam has things to do as Cap so idk how much they would be able to tie together to make a season 2. I would be up for watching it though, really love the dynamic of these two on and off screen.

[furyfought]

abernathy is a small town, surely you’ve met AGATHA KLEIN ; they can be a little IRREVERENT & OPPORTUNISTIC but have no fear , the TWENTY SEVEN year old definitely makes up for it by being IMPISH & SENSITIVE . most of the time anyway .  they’re usually seen around KLEIN & ASSOCIATES, LLC , as a CRIMINAL DEFENSE ATTORNEY . you know, i hear they’re affiliated with the local mc, iron kings as an ATTORNEY . they’ve got this vibe of A HEART GROWN RAVENOUS, A CYANIDE CENTER ENCAPSULATED BY SACCHARINE FRUIT, AND A SOUL IN THE FORM OF A SCRIBBLE WITH FANGS going on , makes them easily recognizable.

loosely inspired by jennifer check (jennifer's body), wendy byrde (ozark), ginger fitzgerald (ginger snaps), elizabeth sloane (miss sloane), john silver (black sails), & BBHMM.

+ pinterest, stats.

hey, friends. i’m devin (or dev) & very tickled to be here. agatha’s a combination of two of my favorite muses, and i can only hope that you’ll love her as much as i do. 🤎

"𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄, 𝐈 𝐀𝐌 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒. 𝐍𝐎. 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐒𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓."

agatha’s story isn’t one that she likes to tell anymore. she feels it’s useless: to be defined by the actions of others, to attempt to battle the preconceived notions that run rampant regardless of what one says or does. she doesn’t want to beg for understanding anymore, or to claw her way from beneath the filth she’s made of her life. all that most know is all that she can bear to have known. the rest? it’s confetti; a meager concession in a game of chess. if you know her, is that a fact or a weapon to be used against her?

when it comes to the stories that can be told, however.. perhaps the most important is background. agatha’s an abernathy native: raised in grandiose park, flew the coop for college, only to settle back down in bordeaux apartments. klein & associates, llc. has been in her family for generations, each forefather serving increasingly questionable clients. agatha’s life, like that of many kleins before her, was already planned before she’d ever even been a thought in her parents’ minds. under her mother’s rule, there wasn’t any room for straying from that path. agatha would be smart; she would be clean; and she would be, without fail, someone. in other words, she would be her perfect replica. imagine the disappointment when agatha was anything but. 

agatha’s childhood can be summed up by three things: a door slammed shut in her face, an ear-piercing howl, and the chronic longing to go home — wherever that was. it’s another thing she doesn’t talk about, another thing she tries not to think about. those three things have followed her into adulthood, but they’ve taken different forms now. no longer is agatha a child screaming her throat raw — no; now, she cries out in other more productive ways. if you were to ask her, she’d tell you that she’s a woman grown; the past is behind her, buried in the sand where it belongs. the truth is trickier, less absolute. agatha is a child in the form of a woman; forever in the midst of a metamorphosis, unsure if for better or worse. she lacks foresight & lives largely in the now. she can’t imagine a future for herself and her choices in life reflect that.

agatha succeeds because she’s pretty, powerful, and convincing. wherever she falls short, her father is sure to more than make up for it. it’s amazing what people will do for the right price, and when they want to keep certain secrets from ever seeing the light. nepotism & immense privilege have done wonders for her, but she does.. actually work hard, too. she has an incredible memory & is really good at digging for more information & making her case. if she tells you that she’s going to do something, then she’s going to do it right no matter what. she’s dogged in that way, blinded to the outside world by her stubbornness. she works long hours & values her career above all else. she thinks it’s the only sure thing she has & views it as the one stable, secure thing in her life.

agatha is lonely to the point of defect. she lacks a sense of security in her life, which is why she’s so career-focused. she genuinely thinks that the only person ever looking out for her is her dad. she becomes very predictable once you realize that she will always pick the winning team; that she will forever follow the money; and that she is always going to make the decision that most benefits her. that isn’t to say that she doesn’t have any friends omg, but.. she doesn’t really trust easily. if she trusts you and considers you near and dear to her heart, then she’ll choose you. but until she has that reassurance? you’re on your own, bro. 

but like.. you literally would not know that unless you got burned by her. agatha is really good at listening and really good at playing parts for people. the thing with having no story is that she’s free to create her own. if you need a hero, she can be that. if you need a villain, she can definitely be that. she’s eerily good at getting chummy enough to make people think she’s close, only for them to realize.. they don’t actually know anything real about her? fun stuff. 

i think.. her entire life is a vie for power while also wanting to let go of that desire while also being afraid of what might happen if she were to let go of that desire. she’s not tht bad. she can play decent, be a guy’s guy. and she does come off tht way. it’s jus.. underneath there’s tht like .. tht rot tht she can’t scrub away. n it rears its ugly little head smtimes. but. :^) she can be cool n shoot the shit u kno.. heheh.

anyway.. lighter stuff<3 puts the gaslight and gatekeep in girlboss. talks just like her daddy, except for when she’s in the courtroom. egocentric without ever meaning to be. (spoiler: it’s a smoke screen.) she can, must, and will find a way to twist your words into something she can make sense of. believes in mixed drink supremacy. will absolutely smoke all of your weed + play dumb about hogging the blunt. plays dumb a lot actually, until it’s time to be smart. she’s touchy-feely, but freezes up whenever someone touches her. stares — a lot. can’t ever be the person to pick you up after a rough night out, because she’s likely there with you egging you on to do one more shot. every event is a tits out event / she has to be the most overdressed person in the convenience store at all times. can, must, and will be your unsolicited sugar momma. YOU SPIL-DBFDHFDJHBF LIPSTICK IN MY VALENTINO WHITE BAG? energy. thinks everything is a competition because it is. if she loved you once then she loves you forever. thinks going 20 over the speed limit isn’t speeding, actually. a bit of an emotional anarchist. can’t actually take what she’ll dish out. teases u if she likes u. teases u if she doesn’t like u. doesn’t care abt the feud as long as she’s gettin’ tht shmoney. big fan of an emotional sucker punch. 

"𝐌𝐘 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐄𝐄𝐌𝐒 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐈𝐓𝐒 𝐎𝐖𝐍 𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐋, 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐈 𝐀𝐌 𝐀𝐋𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐘 𝐀𝐍 𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐋."  + below are some ideas open to any & all muses no matter the age, gender, affiliation, etc !

i’ve left how she got involved with the mc totally absent from this intro bc i was hoping to plot it out! i’d love it if someone wanted to be her “in”. could be they were a childhood friend in need of help, a client she got close to, jus smth tht happened by chance.. whtever we come up with works! <3

if anyone needs an evil ex gf .. She’s Here. she will lie, cheat, scam, trash yr car, empty yr bank account.. whtvr you need, baybee<3

conversely.. not-so-evil ex gf? agatha can be nice & caring without there being a catch sometimes. maybe they still talk. maybe they’re friends. u tell me.

fwb / ex fwb? she do be sending them ‘u up?’ texts. 

someone tht agatha only got close to bc she wanted them to testify/be a character witness in court oopz<3

omg actual friends pls.. ppl tht Know her. tht See her. ppl tht she cares abt n would actually do anything for. friends!!!!!!!!!!!!

agatha has “get off my lawn” energy so i think it would be very funnie if someone needed a place to crash n she let them stay at hers thinking it was temporary n then they jus.. did not leave. n she’s like 🤨 hello?

an almost smth? anything weird n awkward n unspoken tht maybe fizzled out or maybe still lingers under the surface?

agatha doesn’t have a budding drinking problem but if she does no she doesn’t but if she does then<3 drinking buddy? someone that she’s gotten into questionable shenanigans with? poor bartender tht has to deal w her trying to “help” them as she waits for her uber to come? the possibilities are endless.

agatha’s all bark n very little bite but i still think it’d be funnie if she had a hateship. jus putting tht out there<3

if yr muse wnts an ego boost via unrequited crush.. lmk. i’m willing to hulk smash all of agatha’s dignity jus for u.

omggg a dealer? >.> who said tht omg #hacked.. 

on n off again thingz? lorde wrote tht "i am my mother's child i'll love you til my breathing stops / i'll love you till you call the cops on me" line abt her</3

budding friendships!!!!!!! ppl tht she goes to pilates or yoga with; people she gets brunch with; ppl she keeps running into n its like heeey u :); little platonic crushes jus . all of the cute platonic thingz tht make her go wtf is this 🤨. 

i mean.. if anyone wants a sugar momma.. I MEANNN..

college friends!! law school friends!! ppl she met over the summer while interning somewhere!! i left tht purposely vague, hint-hint.

tinder dates gone wrong. ghosted tinder dates. tinder thingz.

agatha’s been attending galas / banquets / office partiez for ages now so if anyone wants to be her plus one or her lil fake date... :^) could be cute. cld be angsty. world is our oyster. 

speaking of which.. coworkers n maybe even a lil personal assistant would be so sexie.