#josh is in alaska

[angelx1992]

[eclectic-collections]

niche special interest; paranormal reality tv

and documentaries

honorable mention since it isn't always inherently paranormal

recs welcome! might make a part 2...

also philo is a goldmine for these

[silks-up-my-sleeve]

Once again thinking of my old gvf moodboards :(

[mspi]

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It's unbelievable! Yet family thinks it's alright to use budget airlines still.

My goodness, SNL has every darn reason to rip on Alaska Airlines.

Gotta check this one out:

SNL's Alaska Airlines Commercial

-- dnagirl

06.02.2024

[mammalianmammals]

Ribbon Seal (Histriophoca fasciata), family Phocidae, Bering Land Bridge National Preserve, Alaska

photograph by Josh London

[whitetrashwarriorprincess]

[lemotmo]

Let's watch 911 7x07

All right guys, let���s do this. I’m finally able to sit down and watch episode 7x07. I'll type out my thoughts and feelings as I'm watching.

Disclaimer: This is a fictional show with fictional characters. These characters go through some of the wildest things. This time we have a cheating storyline for Eddie and while, in real life, it would be a big no no, on a TV show like this it’s a narrative I can get behind. These people need to go through dramas to come out on the other side as reborn. It’s what TV is for, an escape from reality. None of it is real. So yeah, while Eddie cheats on Marisol, I will still watch this show and I’ll still be intrigued what this means for him and his narrative. Ultimately this part of his story will serve a purpose and I’m here for that.

So, let’s go!

That first call going to Maddie. She is so damn good at her job.

Oh no, they crashed!

2. No no no, Chimney! An explosion! Stay away Eddie! Oh no, she’s burned badly, isn’t she? Inhalation burns.

Where is the baby?

Why is Athena the only police officer working these cases? There is never another police officer on call.

Where is the baby? Please don’t hurt the baby!

That poor lady.

Where is the damn baby?

3. That’s right, no screens during dinner. I have the same rule at home. My son is used to it by now.

Mara! Denny knows about her baby brother, Tyson. Oh that poor sweet girl.

4. Oh, the ice cream Marisol scene. I’m afraid now! Christopher really seems to like her. That poor kid is going to go through it, isn’t he. Another woman who will eventually leave him, for good reason I know, but still…

Ooooh, fake Shannon! Cue Eddie having a flashback of Shannon. Man, grief can be so hard sometimes. The moment you think you’re doing better, something happens to throw you back in the middle of it. Imagine seeing a döppelganger of your deceased wife. That has to be hard on anyone.

5. Hen is such a great mother. I love how she talks to Mara and really understands what is going on with her.

That’s right baby! Denny is nice. Of course you miss him.

Has he been taken by the foster system?

6. What do you mean her husband is in Alaska? Who is that guy? And where is the baby???

Oh Maddie, this has to be hard for her. All of those memories. That’s right Josh, talk some sense into her.

7. Foster families are important, but it sucks how siblings are separated.

Oh… Mara’s mother had an affair. Man, there is a theme running through this episode.

I don’t think the system can do a lot in cases like this Hen. Sometimes hands are tied.

8. The burn unit. Oh, that is Amir huh? 'The only one responsible is the driver, the rest of us are left to clean up the mess.' Auwch! This is the guy who is going to go after Bobby, isn’t he?

Side note: Theo Huxtable was my favourite on ‘The Cosby Show’. I know, I know, we’re not supposed to watch it anymore and shit, but I grew up with that show, so yeah.

He seems like a nice guy. Are we sure he’s going after Bobby?

Maddie, you’re a nurse… mask up when you visit a burn victim!

9. No no no, I don’t want to see this scene! No Eddie, don’t do it!!!

Of course fake Shannon would walk out to talk to him. I would! I mean, the guy looks gorgeous.

A candle? Instant stimulation. Noooooooo, don’t do it babe! On the beach with Shannon.

Ryan, the actor that you are. Your eyes speak to me!

Nooooo, you aren’t single babe!!!! Have you forgotten about Marisol without a last name? She was right there in the beginning of the episode, eating ice cream with you.

Edmundo… really? This harkens back to Ana times.

Fake Shannon is called Kim.

But really, Kim is the spitting image of Shannon. How can he resist this? All he’s ever wanted was to be enough for Shannon and now he has another chance. Of course he’ll take it. The loveable idiot!

The S keychain… I mean, Eddie babe, she isn’t Shannon. She’s another person. You can’t just replace your deceased wife with a new copy. It doesn’t work that way. She looks like her, but she’s a completely different woman.

10. Mommy and me classes. Hen and Karen stalking yet again another parent of one of their foster children. Well, not the real parent, but you know what I mean. They’ve done this before. This isn’t healthy ladies. I understand your motivation, but it just isn’t healthy. You’ll end up being kicked out of the system if you continue like this.

11. Maddie, stop obsessing babe. It isn’t healthy. Where is Chimney?

Aaaah, that’s right! He’s her husband now!!!! YAY!

Oh, Chimney, you are the best husband. You get it. You understand her so well.

This scene is gold! GOLD!

Oh, this guy isn’t connected to the lady at all, is she?

12. OMG! He’s the neighbour! He has to be.

That poor mother.

13. Wait… is that Shannon or Kim in bed with Eddie? Please let it be Shannon! I’m not ready for a full-blown sexual affair.

Side note: it is so weird that the women on 911 always have their bras on when they have sex. Meanwhile the TV-shows that get made in my country have full-blown nudity and very explicit unapologetic sex scenes, and no one bats an eye over it.

What is going on? Is it Kim? It can’t be!

Whose room is that? That isn’t Eddie’s bed, is it?

Oh, it’s a memory… or is it? I don’t think he slept with Shannon before she saw him at Christmas, did he? I remember that scene where they had sex upside down on the bed and then she quickly had to leave because Chris came home. This is so different.

O_o Dude! No! Marisol is right there. I have no love for this women, since I hardly know her, but this is a big no no! Not in front of her salad.

14. Oh, he was a handyman. A real stalker.

Maddie is calling the sister? Isn’t that against protocol? This show just throws every single rule into the bin.

Kyle had to make a fresh start from what? Oh no, his wife left with the baby. This guy is full on psychotic, isn’t he? He’s living in a delusion where the victim and her baby are his own wife and child.

What is he feeding that baby?

Oh no, this guy is crazy! A new mommy?

Maddie, you genius you!!! I love you! You understand creepy guys like no other.

Someone save that baby!!!!!! Nooo!

Chimney knows!

Oh Buck tackled that guy! His back has to be broken! That dude is massive!

The woman is safe!

15. Oh no, Amir’s eyes! He knows Bobby. Such a great actor.

Bobby is in trouble.

16. Tyson, yes. So happy that Mara gets to see her brother again.

Of course he remembers here. Kids always do.

17. Buck is cooking. I don’t want to watch the next scene, because I know what is coming. But okay.

This is so homey and cosy. The three of them together.

Smoke though? Foreshadowing?

Good cologne? We won’t wait up for you? Oh Buck… if you only knew what your best friend was up to. You could have stopped him to talk some sense into him.

This scene though. They’re a unit, the three of them. One day…

But first Eddie needs to deal with some of his demons. Let’s go.

18. Thank God, some Madney first. I need a little break before disaster strikes. Jee is sooo cute.

No more bad dreams tonight? Yeah, maybe not for Jee. I’m about to have a full blown nightmare in 3... 2... 1... and there it is...

19. Pffff, Eddie Eddie Eddie. I’m so disappointed in you right now. Don’t get me wrong, I still love you to bits and you’re still my fav on 911, but what are you doing? Not only to yourself, but to Marisol, Kim and Chris?

If you wanted to date this woman so badly, why didn’t you break up with Marisol first? It would have been the most decent thing to do for everyone involved.

Do you think this will bring Shannon back? It won’t you know. Kim is a different woman. Next to that, you are idealising your marriage to Shannon. It’s blinding you and stopping you from moving forward in life.

You need to let go of Shannon. Lay her to rest.

But I can see that you aren’t planning for that.

This is all going to come to a very messy ending and you’ll be left in the dust my friend. I just hope Chris doesn’t get pulled into this. I don’t ever want him to know.

Wait until Buck finds out. Not looking forward to that scene. It’ll be hard to watch.

I wonder if they are going to make this in a full-blown sexual affair, or an emotional cheating affair. And how long will it last? One episode? Two? What will make him see that what he’s doing is self-destructing? I’m convinced that this man is hurting deeply and he just wants to feel happy again, no matter the cost. He has this illusion that everything was perfect with Shannon, but it wasn’t. All of this will come crashing down and he’ll be left in the dust, alone.

If we have to believe Ryan’s interview, he’ll eventually crawl out of the pit of despair as a new man. Which is a good thing. But he’s going to go through it first and I’m here for it. I'll gobble up every single scene and the gut-wrenching heartbreak Eddie will go through the moment he will realise that he has f*cked up so badly.

Side note: We have now seen three people of the 118 cheat, in different ways, on their partners by now. I wonder if there’s something in the water?

[xplrvibes]

Thoughts on episode 2?

It was fine.

I just answered an ask where I kind of touched on the Cody and Satori thing, but it bares repeating - the more I see of that, the more I side eye the entire thing.

It's interesting, but I just...I don't know.

I will say that I find the Abigail ghost, whether real or made-up, to be the sweetest thing on earth with her little excited dances and her whole "yea, I'll protect you guys!" routine.

And, you know she's down to ride for these boys for life after she got hit with the full offensive of the Colby Brock Patented Charm™️, lol. "I know you're the protector of the house, I know you're the matriach, and we want to consider you that as well," with that intensely earnest stare right at where he thinks this ghost is standing.

Like, fuck yea, I will catch a paranormal grenade for you now, you are now my soul child for life.

The Estes Method is always fun, but it's less fun when you've now got TWO people who won't stop bombarding with the questions and the on-the-spot dot connecting. We need less of that. I would love for them to do the old school Ghost Hunters method of just doing this shit and then reviewing the footage later to connect the dots after the fact. I feel like it would be less chaotic and honestly, they'd probably see better results at the end of the day.

Couple of random things that I'll mention, but don't want to dive too deeply into:

Something is severely wrong with their core body temperatures if they can go out into the woods of Rhode Island in August and sleep bundled up like they're in Alaska in December.

The dancing on the grave thing - I feel like doing something like that is way more likely to get you cursed than looking at a factory manufactured reproduction of a doll, but what do I know (I'm sorry Robert, for speaking about your reproduction dolls without your permission).

The REM pod at the door of the library...honestly, I think even when they were standing way far away, it was picking them up. Colby closes the door, and it immediately ceased. I mean, come on.

It was cool that they caught the door opening on camera from two different angles. Getting it from one angle is one thing, but getting it from both sides of the door makes it so much more impactful. Multiple camera angles, boys. More of that.

Oh! The names in the sand thing. I can't believe they are still trying to push that as having been paranormal in nature. It pissed me off when they did this in the video from last year (for that review, feel free to browse my "snc video review" tag, I'm almost positive i talked about that one), but to bring it back and use the people who work in the house and their sort of sus knocking method to "confirm" that this was some lonely soldier ghost who wanted to get with Amanda? No. 0/10 right there.

To end these bullet points on a positive...the Josh shirt pulling thing was pretty cool.

So, the last 30 seconds of this video is not something I am going to discuss, because trust me when I say you guys do not want to hear my opinion on that. You won't like it, I won't like hearing about how you won't like it, and honestly, I don't even want to talk about it. Just know that it deflated my balloon, and let's leave it at that.

But, commenting on the 5 minutes before the last 30 seconds - if anyone ever comes in new to the snc world and asks for a summation of who snc are and how they function as a duo, I'm sending them the clip of Sam deciding to summon every the basement demon to the upstairs and Colby just giving him the most deadpan, "I'm gonna kill you when we get home" look and then popping out from behind a wall (when did he even get there) to start a "I told you not to do that!" argument with Sam right then and there. That was the most long-suffering married couple interaction I've seen them have in a long time.

And then Colby turned into a theater kid there for a few seconds, with that whole dramatic diatribe on the steps about the Perrons. That was...a choice he made, lol.

And then yea, the video ended right when Colby rolled under the table to sleep (cause that won't end with a concussion when you wake up in the middle of the night lol) and I left happy. Nothing happened after that. That's where the whole screen goes black.

I'm giving the video (minus the last 30 seconds that don't exist in my mind) a 6.9/10. It was fun at parts, there was some good evidence, I enjoyed it...but there were some things that didn't hit for me.

Anyway, reminder to all that the preceeding was MY OPINION, and MY OPINION IS NOT LAW.

[meiloorunsmoothie]

i found this on youtube, and it was so cringy, but jeremy was so funny (jessica was good too) O.o

also can we just appreciate:

that josh was basically just jeremy

jeremy talking about being from alaska with a slight texas accent

jeremy having emotional scenes with himself

[satans-helper]

Reaching for Stardust - Part I

Read Looking for Space here.

Listen to the LFS playlist / RFS playlist (all fic playlists get updated even to this day!!)

Word Count: ~3300

Warnings: none

A/N: Y'all...I'm so happy to be here, immersed in this new series. I began writing this back in April after I, seemingly out of thin air, came up with a foundation that seemed solid enough to even attempt writing a sequel to my beloved LFS. Ever since I finished that fic, I thought that one day, I might return for more. I have a very hard time letting any series go and LFS was truly a momentous project in my life--the fact that so many people have read it and continue to read it brings me so much joy, I can't even tell you.

Having been a fan of GVF for about five years now, I do feel a lot of sentimentality and nostalgia surrounding the band, the music and definitely my own fics, too, particularly all my series. I can still remember exactly where I was and what I was doing when I was mapping out certain pieces of them in my mind. I felt a huge rush of nostalgia recently when I revisited my city's planetarium for a star show, which was a huge source of inspiration for LFS, and I realized that it was literally this same month, August, in 2019 that I was just finishing up the first 8 chapters of LFS, not even planning on making it a 30-something part series (LOL!). You'll see, if you read, that some of these feelings find their way into RFS. This isn't because it's a self-insert fic, rather that's inspired by how much this fandom has seen, experienced and grown over the years. I imagine my friends and readers who were back there in the pre-pandemic GVF era can relate to some level of nostalgia. A big theme in RFS is change. I think we all can absolutely relate to that, too. One thing remains the same though--this is a love story, through and through.

This probably seems like major overkill to introduce fan fiction but this is how I feel. Many of my old GVF friends have moved on in some way or another and I've often felt alone the past few years with still being so tethered to this group of beautiful, silly, fascinating boys that spark so much joy and fantasy for all of us. So, as always, thank you so, so much for reading my fics. I really hope you enjoy

P.S. I am cross-posting to wattpad (comments bring me life!)

---

I was getting lost in the pictures of Alaska–deep, shiny blue water, towering, white-capped mountains, a vivid stream of neon green in the Aurora Borealis, lush green forests. Even enormous, graceful whales surfacing, their tails nearly popping out of my screen as I unconsciously leaned in closer, hovering over my desk. I blinked hard as I turned my attention to the next picture that had been emailed over to me–a huge white ship, lined with windows that seemed endless–and huffed, shifting in my squeaky second-hand office chair. I didn’t even have a true desire to go on a cruise or even go to Alaska, but the neverending research into foreign lands nagged at me, reminded me that it felt like a very a long time since I’d been anywhere new. At least not anywhere exciting, really. 

I grabbed my phone and opened the gallery to scroll through the last trip Josh and I had been on. It’d been a long weekend about nine months prior, which reminded me that it wasn’t all that long ago at all but it still felt like ages since returning to the normalcy of day to day life. It had been a gorgeous summer excursion where we’d had a comfortable, clean hotel room, a warm pool and three nights out all to ourselves, and I found myself yearning for that freedom and escapism again. Plus the sunshine and heat. Michigan winters persisted, long and brutal, and we hadn’t broken through into any real spring weather until just the past week, which had at least given Sam a nice birthday. Josh and Jakes’ birthday was coming up fast. I thought it’d be nice to do something for them, with all of us–go somewhere for real again, all four of us, run amok in a hotel or airbnb. Or just have a nice dinner together followed by bar-hopping. Whatever the twins wanted, really. 

The picture I’d secretly snapped of Josh in our hotel room wandering out of the bathroom completely naked save for a towel twirled around his head came up after a dual selfie of us at the pool and I laughed loudly to myself, throwing my hand to my mouth. I’d nearly forgotten about so many of the little moments. It was so easy to forget when time kept slipping by like the wind, each good moment gone in the blink of an eye and each bad moment suspended in the air until something else came along, and the minutes turned to days and the days turned to weeks and months and before I even knew it, years had gone by and it felt like nothing and everything had changed all at once. 

Next I scrolled to a picture of the best breakfast I’d ever had, this amazing brie-stuffed French toast with a warm berry compote and housemade whipped cream, then the picture of Josh’s breakfast, which had been a skillet full of chorizo, bell peppers, eggs and queso that he’d deemed to be “orgasmic.” My stomach clenched in response and I looked at my phone clock, suddenly eager for dinner once again. My hours were almost up with 5 p.m. creeping on me and my mind turned its attention to Josh and I’s relatively new Friday night ritual–binging on Chinese and watching the most obscure, nonsensical horror movie we could find. With that, I swiveled around to stretch my legs in the sun through the window and pulled up the menu on my phone, trading pictures of Alaskan mountains for pictures of fried dumplings and greasy lo mein; a few seconds later, a very appropriate text popped up:

Hey mama, I’m gonna be a little late tonight. Want me to pick up dinner on the way home?

Yes please. What’s your ETA?

8ish? What’s on the menu tonight?

I’m gonna do the orange chicken and an egg roll. Wanna share some crab rangoon?

yes I do. What about dumplings?

obviously! 

;) see you soon 

I’d need something to hold myself over until Josh got home, though I was glad to have this part of our routine to look forward to. Stability was important and even Josh had come to understand that more and more. I turned my attention back to Alaska, mulling over the images and cycling through words in my head that I could bring to the page and entice people with, as if cruises needed more promotional materials and marketing to bring in profit. They were relatively cheap, all-inclusive and easy for people to handle and reminding myself of this made me bitter all over again–why couldn’t my company make one of their perks a free trip for employees once a year? I didn’t know their exact state of finances but I bet it could be done. They just didn’t want to. And the irony was that they didn’t pay most of their employees enough to take extravagant trips of their own.

Whatever. There were other, more important things I told myself, getting up to stretch and find something from the fridge or snack cupboard. In 32 more minutes I could clock out and put these wild places out of my head for a bit–the weather called for a long walk somewhere.

It was the nicest day we’d had so far, which I fully realized once I was driving and headed out to a familiar, easy forest trail Josh and I often did together on the weekends. But we had a busy weekend coming up, actually. We desperately needed to stock up on groceries–my most recent find of an old packet of peanuts as my last snack was testament to that–and then the boys had a show at Waterstreet. Sunday wouldn’t be as fun–my sister was repainting the entire interior of her new house and had somehow roped Josh and I into helping, in part because we were just that nice, according to Josh anyway, and also because she let each of us pick one color for one room each. Josh had chosen a shade of dusky desert red for the den and I’d chosen something called “spring morning,” a pale lilac, for the powder room, which seemed pretty fitting for the time of year she was making these renovations. 

The trail was bustling, which I wasn’t surprised by, and much of my walk was spent nodding and smiling to other people passing by. The break in weather was infectious for all of us in the area–everyone seemed to be in better moods finally, myself included even despite the gripes I had with work and money and everything else. Sometimes it felt like just yesterday that Josh and I were lying on our backs in the deep black night, gazing up at infinite stars and trying to come up with material for that poetry class that had been the catalyst to bring us together. The warm sun above me while I continued down the dirt path also reminded me of days past, of the first hike Josh and I ever had together when we both stripped down to our feelings, laughed, kissed through sweat, and had decided that was it. We’d made a lot of decisions over the years, so many that I felt like I hadn’t even noticed some of them, but I’d never decided to let fog cloud my memories. I hated that it happened regardless. And sometimes I absolutely hated what changes all the decisions had led to. I wanted to go back in time every once in a while to relive those moments and those days and it made my heart ache to know I couldn’t. Josh would assure me that the future would be just as good–and sometimes even better–than what those memories had to offer. 

And he was often right. Life was good, and I reminded myself of that as I narrowly avoided tripping over an obtuse rock sticking out of the dirt, it was just more challenging now. There was no school to fall back on–I hadn’t realized how much of a safety net that had really been at the time–and less free time. There were more financial worries. More pressures in life. But if nothing else, I had the best people in my life possible; if nothing else, Josh and I were rock solid. He didn’t let a week go by without reminding me that we were soulmates and I agreed wholeheartedly–no matter what might happen, we’d have each other. 

After my walk, I thought about running our necessary errands on my own but ultimately decided that’d be a deviation in routine I didn’t want to make. Josh was the best person to go grocery shopping with, being surprisingly focused and deliberate in his choices. He also was the best at picking out produce, somehow always able to discern which fruit was just the right amount of ripe, and he was good at finding the best deals. He was the coupon cutter, which always made me laugh, and I was the one who followed instinct more than the list we mutually made the day before. I would get caught up in being frivolous, more often than not tossing special treats into the cart that I couldn’t excuse beyond something like, “Come on, you like them too” to which Josh would agree with his cheeky little grin. 

And that same grin was on his face later that night when he came home with the bag bursting with Chinese takeout. His voice and the smell of soy sauce and that syrupy orange stuff made me hop up from the couch, excited for all the things, but mostly him.

Josh gave a little groan as he headed into the kitchen, his backpack still over his shoulders while he carried the white plastic bag in his right hand and his keys in his left. “Sorry I’m late,” he said, shuffling and rustling all the way out of my sight. “Stephanie needed extra time–she’s having trouble with the new cameras. And to be fair, they do have a steep learning curve. You remember how much trouble I had with them last week?” 

I followed him in, taking the bag out of his hand so he could zip back out and discard his keys and backpack. “Which one is Stephanie again? The one who’s obsessed with ‘film noir?’” 

Josh chuckled from beyond the walls before appearing again, pink-cheeked and smiling. “Yeah, that’s her. And that’s another thing–I’m gonna have to review how these cameras even film in black and white because for the life of me I can’t remember right now.” 

“Does she have any movie recs?” I asked as I opened a cupboard to get plates. “We gotta figure out what we’re watching tonight.”

“What about Night of the Reaper? You haven’t seen that one yet.”

“Yeah, but you've seen it,” I replied, wagging a pair of chopsticks at him. “That’s like, cheating. We gotta watch something we both haven’t seen.”

“We’ll find something.” Josh moved in close and pressed a quick kiss to my cheek and my heart fluttered–it always did. “What about you? What’d you get up today in my absence?”

“I went to the Hemlock Trail. It was busy,” I told him while we both plated our respective dishes, my stomach growling. “It was nice though. Looks like we’re gonna have good weather for your birthday.”

“That would be ideal but I’m going to be cautiously optimistic. Last year we had snow, remember?”

“Yeah, like a dusting,” I said with a little laugh, purposefully knocking my hip into his. “I’m gonna be blatantly optimistic and say it’ll be good. And we still gotta figure out what you wanna do.”

“We'll figure it out, my love.” Josh led the way to the living room and sank into the couch which we could have probably done with replacing; he set his can of sparkling water on the end table then grabbed the remote. “I’m so excited for these dumplings. I don’t care if it’s cat food.”

“They do kind of taste like cat food, don’t they?” I concurred, settling down on the other side of the couch. I put my plate on the coffee table in front of us and pulled it closer. 

“They smell like cat food, too,” Josh said, picking a dumpling up between his pair of chopsticks. “I don’t mind. They’re fucking delicious.” 

“I really don’t get how you’ve always known how to use chopsticks,” I remarked, opting for a fork instead to pierce my own dumpling while Josh fished through the cushions for the remote as he chewed. “It’s not fair.”

“I’ve tried to teach you, doll.”

“And I haven’t learned, so either you’re a shit teacher or I’m a shit student.”

Josh laughed and swatted my arm with the remote. “Hush! I’ll have you know that my students love me.”

I nodded, chewing. “So I’m a shitty student after all.”

“You are not. There’s a learning curve to chopsticks too, ya know.” Josh took another bite of his dumpling then leaned forward, peering at the TV. “Okay, so–what’re we watching?”

I followed his scrolling through our shared list of choices while I tackled the orange chicken. “What about that one?” I asked when he paused on the title Devil’s Ground. “It looks pretty obscure. 1983, a director I’ve never heard of, looks grainy and weird.”

“It’s been on our list forever,” Josh said, clicking the play button. “Let’s give it a shot.”

The movie really did turn out to be obscure–the protagonist was a teenage girl who finds an old well in the middle of the woods and climbs down into it, for some reason believing that her missing brother would be down there. Josh and I chided about the already well-known fairytale parallels, except in this movie the girl encountered creatures in the world beyond the well even weirder than those in Alice in Wonderland or Labyrinth, and ended up having to get betrothed to some menacing demon, played by a giant puppet, to save her brother. Then she and her brother kill the demon and find their way out of the strange world and back in their world.

Josh laughed loudly as the movie came to an end. “That was ridiculous. One of the best ones we’ve seen so far.”

“Those puppets were something else,” I commented, watching the credits roll and hoping everyone on that production went on to do better things. “The little blue one with teeth was my favorite.”

“Why didn’t they just get a real actor for the demon?” Josh asked, shaking his head. “Good god. It was a travesty but also kind of brilliant. I could show this to my students to demonstrate the use of close-up shots.”

“The close-up on the puppet demon when he was being slaughtered seemed unnecessary.”

Josh got up and stretched, gathering all of our plates and silverware and his chopsticks. “It really was. You want me to do the dishes?”

I turned the TV off and followed him, carrying in our empty drinks. “I thought another part of our Friday night tradition was saving the dishes for the next day and we can argue about it then.” 

“No argument. You get to do them since I got the food,” Josh said as he set the plates into the sink with a clatter, then pinched my side. “Deal?”

I giggled, shrinking away from his ticklish touch. “Deal.”

“Anyway, my darling,” Josh began to say, twirling away from me and to another kitchen cabinet. I watched, amused at how he always struggled to reach far enough up to get the wine glasses. “There’s a full moon tonight. Let’s go see it.”

“What? There is?” I asked, trying to peek at wherever it may have been through the kitchen window, our third-story apartment giving us a halfway decent view of the sky most of the time. That was one of the few perks of this place–we’d moved in last year, sizing up so I could have my “office” and enough space in general for both of us to not be completely on top of one another–though Josh never complained about that–but the building was old and lacking a number of things, namely outdoor space. Our little balcony was all we had anymore. 

Josh trailed out, wine glasses tinkling in one hand while he held the mostly full bottle of red wine in the other, and I followed again, feeling a sense of eagerness for the night sky which I hadn’t felt in, well, about a month. Our life together was full of tradition, I had come to realize in time, and a viewing party of the full moon whenever possible was certainly one of them. I’d just been too wrapped up in Alaskan cruises to remember this one on the calendar. 

The night air was chilly–a tingle ran down my spine and Josh noticed this as I sat down next to him on the cushioned bench we’d garbage-picked right after moving in. He skillfully and quickly poured each of us wine, set the bottle down and wrapped his free arm around my shoulders, pulling me in close. 

“It’s gorgeous,” he declared, his voice as rich as ever but a softness brushed through those words. I always loved whenever he got so starstruck over something that he couldn’t help but be concise. 

“It really is,” I agreed, pulling my gaze away from Josh’s equally–if not more so–gorgeous face to take in the huge globe of bright cool white above us. “I can’t believe I forgot about it. Sometimes I feel like I don’t even know what planet I’m on.”

Josh laughed, light and affectionate. “You’re on planet earth. It’s disappointing sometimes, I know, but if we weren’t here, I’m not sure we’d be able to see the moon and the stars like this.”

I took a drink, already lulled by Josh’s voice and his warm, strong arm around me. He’d always been strong, considerable muscle secure beneath silky tan skin, but he’d gotten stronger still; the muscles had become even more obvious and I sometimes poked fun, and a little bit of envy, at him for being a “hard-body” because, well, he was. I’d learned to memorize the curves and lines of his body throughout the changes, tracing every plain and valley with my fingers whenever I had the chance.“Probably not, no. We’re really lucky after all, aren’t we?” I said, reaching up to stroke his hand over my shoulder. 

“I think we are. Especially if we can see the stars wherever we go.”

“Speaking of–earlier I was thinking about how it’s been a while since we took a trip anywhere.”

“Yeah? Well, where would you want to go?” Josh asked, bringing his wine to his lips. “Not Alaska, I assume.”

“No, not Alaska. But I don’t know, Josh, I feel like we should go somewhere soon.”

Josh took another drink, looking ahead through the darkness that was interrupted by various porch lights from the other apartments rather than up at the jeweled sky. I’d expected enthusiasm–he’d have more free time soon with the semester coming to an end and I still had a lot of vacation days left, making the whole thing easy in theory–but he was uncharacteristically quiet. 

“What?” I prodded, tugging at his wrist. 

“No, nothing,” he assured me, coming alive again with his body squirming beside me, his hand grabbing mine in reciprocity. “I was just thinking about it. We should both think about it some more.”

I returned my attention back to the moon and the stars and a memory overcame me so viscerally it actually hurt–the abandoned barn, the vast field, the endless sky hanging overhead the two of us. “Alright, let’s think about it,” I concluded, wishing that the place we could travel to was back in time. 

Josh sighed and curled around me. “I feel like a dumpling,” he said, lifting a hand to pat his stomach, and I laughed right into the night along with him.

---

Tagging no one because my list is so outdated that none of those people are even in the fandom or use tumblr anymore LOL please let me know if you'd like to be tagged in this series!

[dontmeantobepoliticalbut]

Senate GOP Leader Mitch McConnell bluntly warned Republican senators in a private meeting not to sign on to a bill from Sen. Josh Hawley aimed at limiting corporate money bankrolling high-powered outside groups, telling them that many of them won their seats thanks to the powerful super PAC the Kentucky Republican has long controlled.

According to multiple sources familiar with the Tuesday lunch meeting, McConnell warned GOP senators that they could face “incoming” from the “center-right” if they signed onto Hawley’s bill. He also read off a list of Senators who won their races amid heavy financial support from the Senate Leadership Fund, an outside group tied to the GOP leader that spends big on TV ads in battleground Senate races. On that list of senators: Hawley himself, according to sources familiar with the matter.

McConnell has long been a chief opponent of tighter campaign finance restrictions. But there’s also no love lost between McConnell and Hawley, who has long criticized the GOP leader and has repeatedly called for new leadership atop their conference. Just on Tuesday, Hawley told CNN that it was “mistake” for McConnell to be “standing with” Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer, a New York Democrat, in their push to tie Ukraine aid to an Israel funding package.

Hawley’s new bill, called the Ending Corporate Influence on Elections Act, is aimed at reversing the Supreme Court’s 2010 Citizens United decision that loosened campaign finance laws – an effort that aligns the conservative Missouri Republican with many Democrats. Hawley’s bill would ban publicly traded corporations from making independent expenditures and political advertisements – and ban those publicly traded companies from giving money to super PACs.

In an interview, Hawley defended his bill and said that corporate influence should be limited in elections.

“I think that’s wrong,” Hawley told CNN. “I think it’s wrong as an original matter. I think it’s warping our politics, and I see no reason for conservatives to defend it. It’s wrong as a matter of the original meaning of the Constitution. It is bad for our elections. It’s bad for our voters. And I just think on principle, we ought to be concerned.”

According to a list of Senators obtained by CNN, McConnell singled out a number of lawmakers who benefited from his outside group over the last three cycles: Mike Braun of Indiana, Kevin Cramer of North Dakota, Marsha Blackburn of Tennessee, Dan Sullivan of Alaska, Joni Ernst of Iowa, Roger Marshall of Kansas, Susan Collins of Maine, Steve Daines of Montana, Thom Tillis of North Carolina, Lindsey Graham of South Carolina, Katie Britt of Alabama, Lisa Murkowski of Alaska, Eric Schmitt of Missouri, Ted Budd of North Carolina, JD Vance of Ohio and Ron Johnson of Wisconsin.

In 2018, Hawley benefited from more than $20 million from McConnell’s group.

McConnell’s office declined to comment.

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Bill Bramhall, New York Daily News

* * * *

LETTERS FROM AN AMERICAN

March 5, 2024 (Tuesday)

HEATHER COX RICHARDSON

MAR 6, 2024

Possibly the biggest story today in terms of its impact on most Americans’ lives is that as part of its war on junk fees, the Biden administration announced an $8 cap on late fees charged by credit card issuers that have more than a million accounts. These companies hold more than 95% of outstanding credit card debt. Currently, fees average $32, and they fall on more than 45 million people. The White House estimates that late fees currently cost Americans about $25 billion a year. The rule change will save Americans about $10 billion a year.

The administration also announced a “strike force” to crack down on “unfair and illegal pricing.” Certain corporations raised prices as strained supply chains made it more expensive to make their products. But after supply chains were fixed and their costs dropped, corporations kept consumer prices high and passed on record profits to their shareholders. The strike force will encourage federal agencies to share information to enable them to identify businesses that are breaking the law. 

Banking organizations and the U.S. Chamber of Commerce came out swinging. Executive vice president Neil Bradley said that such regulation “to micromanage how private businesses set prices will have the same result: shortages, fewer choices for consumers, a weaker economy, and less jobs.” 

And in what perhaps illustrates why voters don’t appear to know much about what the administration is doing, these stories have gotten far less attention today than the primaries and caucuses. 

Today is Super Tuesday, when 15 states and one territory choose their primary candidates for president and for the House of Representatives and the Senate (although in Alaska, only Republicans vote today and in American Samoa, only Democrats vote today). About 36% of Republican delegates will be awarded today, and that’s the side people will be watching because on the Democratic side, Biden has a virtually uncontested lead with the exception of candidate Jason Palmer, who won the Democratic caucuses in American Samoa.

Trump is expected to win today’s Republican contests, but observers are watching to see what percentage of the vote challenger Nikki Haley, former governor of South Carolina, takes from him. As I write this, she appears to have won Vermont and run strongly elsewhere, especially in the suburbs. Three states conducted exit polls and they, too, show warning signs for Trump as 78% of Haley voters in the North Carolina primary, 69% in California, and 68% in Virginia refused to say they would support the party’s nominee no matter who it is. 

It is also notable that polls showed Trump with a much stronger margin over Haley than materialized today. As Josh Marshall of Talking Points Memo notes, it is not yet clear what that means.

Trump is on his way to becoming the Republican presidential nominee. On Friday the Republican National Committee (RNC) will meet in Houston to choose a new chair. The only people running are Trump loyalist Michael Whatley and Trump’s daughter-in-law Lara Trump, who hope to become co-chairs. Natalie Allison reported today in Politico that the RNC will not vote on a resolution that would have prohibited the RNC from covering Trump’s legal bills. 

Trump is certainly in need of money. Today, his lawyers demanded a new trial in the second E. Jean Carroll case, complaining that the judge limited what he could say, and asked for a judgment figure significantly lower than the $83.3 million the jurors awarded. By the end of Friday, Trump must post either the money or a bond covering it.

This morning, Trump told Brian Kilmeade of Fox & Friends that he was not worried about coming up with the money to pay the $454 million he owes in the New York fraud case, or the interest it is accruing at more than $100,000 a day. “I have a lot of money. I can do what I want to do,” Trump said. “I don't worry about anything. I don't worry about the money. I don't worry about money.”

Yesterday, Allen Weisselberg, the former chief financial officer of the Trump Organization, admitted he lied under oath during his testimony in that case. He will be sentenced in April. 

Super Tuesday is also the day that the 2024 presidential campaign begins in earnest for those who had not previously been paying much attention, and Taylor Swift today urged her 282 million followers on Instagram “to vote the people who most represent YOU into power. If you haven't already, make a plan to vote today,” she wrote.

The presidential contest is only one of the many contests on the ballot today, but most of those results are not yet in. 

Although the Arizona primary will not be held until March 19, we did learn today that Senator Kyrsten Sinema (I-AZ) will not run for reelection. Her exit will leave the Arizona senator’s race to election-denying Trump Republican Kari Lake, who lost the Arizona governorship in 2022 (although she continues to insist she won it), and Arizona Democratic representative Ruben Gallego. 

Just as voters don’t appear to know much about what the administration has done to make their lives better, a recent study from a Democratic pollster suggests that voters don’t seem to know much about Trump’s statements attacking democracy. When informed of them, their opinion of Trump falls.

Trump has called for mass deportations of immigrants and foreign-born U.S. citizens; on February 29, he said he would use local police as well as federal troops to round people up and move them to camps for deportation. Asked yesterday by a Newsmax host if he would “order mass deportations if you win the White House,” Trump answered: “Oh, day one. We have no choice. And we’ll start with the bad ones. And you know who knows who they are? Local police. Local police have to be given back their authority, and they have to be given back their respect and immunity.” 

On the one hand, caps to credit card late fees and an attempt to address price gouging; on the other hand, local police with immunity rounding up millions of people and putting them in camps, for deportation. And, in between the two, an election. 

People had better start paying attention. 

LETTERS FROM AN AMERICAN

HEATHER COX RICHARDSON

[northernexposureonly]

MORROW HAD A DIFFERENT ENDING IN MIND FOR JOEL

Morrow and Joel departed the show in February 1995. The final shot featured Joel on a boat in New York Harbor, insinuating that the doctor had returned to his pre-Alaska life. Morrow told People he considered a different trajectory for the doctor. “Josh [Brand] always felt that Joel would go back to New York and would step into the life he always wanted [as a big-city physician],” Morrow said. “I didn't care for that ending. He’s on a boat in New York Harbor in the last shot, but I think of it as mythical rather than literal. I’d like to think Joel moved on and didn’t go back to the life you expected.”

(from 10 Wild Facts About Northern Exposure)

[bbugyu]

no one could be prouder or more pleased to be by your side.

classic | epilogue

2.9k | joshua x afab enby!reader, fluff, humor, swearing, eating, josh is the literal sweetest human alive

this is a quick one! i've actually had this written for about a year LMAO but i never posted for some reason 🤕 anyhow, i threw together a title card and cleaned it up a bit to post as a thank you for 1500 followers! i seriously can't believe so many of you find me worthy of a follow, and i genuinely appreciate it so much. thank you! thank you thank you thank you!!!!!! also yes i pulled the name from THE 00s romcom of all time starring ryan reynolds and sandra bullock and YES i used a joshua picture from canada because that movie is set in alaska (it's as close as i could get without using the gum wall pics ok)

*

sometimes, days were just bad. there was no real cause, and nothing to be done about it, but sometimes small things piled up in ways that you couldn't stop thinking about. you stubbed your toe on the dresser first thing in the morning after not sleeping particularly well or long. your subway car was more crowded than you liked, and when you stopped at a cafe to get a coffee a block away from the studio, you realized you had forgotten the memory card for your camera and had to resort to filming on your phone instead. you only worked at maji studio once a week these days, and you were always excited to spend some time with yunhyeong, but he hadn't been able to make it in because his sister and her wife dropped in for a surprise visit, so you didn't even get to see him. it was slightly too hot for spring and you could feel it under your arms. the pollen count was too high and you could feel it in your nose. your shoes were too new to be fully broken in and you could feel it in your achilles.

all this, and one of your best friends had just gotten engaged.

it went without question that you were extremely happy for the couple, and absurdly excited to celebrate with them, but krys had asked her half-brother to be her "maid" of honor (leaving you relieved, karol indignant, and sending joshua into a manic and panicked research spree), and asked you to make the cake. she had shown you pictures of things she liked, you knew her color scheme, and you had spent the last four years getting to know her tastes, so all in all, she was going to be the easiest client you had ever worked with. however - and you would never let her know in fear that she would retract the responsibility - the added baking you had to do for the cake tasting appointment you scheduled with her put just enough on your plate to have a looming stress over your entire week. 

a recipe for disaster, as it were. and when you dropped your lunch leftovers on the sidewalk outside the loft, the pad see ew and swimming rama that you had ordered in an attempt to brighten your mood splattering over the concrete like a crime scene, you just let out a groan in frustration and planted your palms over your face.

"well, diaz-" you slid your hands down to view the source of the familiar voice, joshua walking up to you from where you saw his car parked down the street and studying the food, hands on his hips to imitate the tv detective from one of your favorite sitcoms. "looks like we got a homicide on our hands."

"fuck today," you whined, your foot stomping against the concrete in that cutesy way you only did around him, and he caught the glimmer of tears in your eyes, immediately dropping the joke.

"aw, baby," he cooed, stepping over the food and gathering you in his arms. "don't cry over spilled thai."

you choked out a laugh as you settled into the hug, sniffling and willing the tears back into your ducts. "i'm not crying."

"you okay?" joshua asked, hand rubbing up and down your back, effectively wiping away your stress with his touch. "do you wanna talk about it?"

you buried your face in his neck, fully succumbing to the embrace despite the fact that you were standing outside, and you had a pretty strict aversion to indulging in intimacy in public places. it felt too nice to let go, joshua's warmth and comfort a welcomed juxtaposition to your awful mood. you sighed. "wouldn't even know where to start."

he breathed out a laugh, squeezing you. "long day?"

"really long."

he pulled away slightly to waggle his eyebrows at you, and you laughed, swatting at his chest. he nodded at the door of your apartment building. "you go wash up. i'll deal with the crime scene."

you pouted at him. "are you sure?"

"of course," he said, letting you start towards the door despite holding onto his arms. "best boyfriend ever. don't you forget it."

you tried to hide a smile. "only because seokmin's a fiancé now."

he pointed at the door. "shut up and get inside before i change my mind."

you giggled at him, making him break and smile at you, but you took the instructions nonetheless, after planting a kiss on his cheek.

the shower felt like therapy, scalding water stripping your skin of grime and your brain of pressure. you took a little longer than normal, water dripping down your face from where it was spraying against the back of your head and neck, letting the incessant noise of it make your mind go blank. after your moment of meditation, you shut off the water and went to find something comfy to wear, but joshua intercepted you at the bathroom door.

"hey," he said, a gentle smile on his lips. "do you wanna go get something good for dinner?"

you blinked at him, towel wrapped around you. "like what?"

"well, i was thinking," he started, letting you step past him into the bedroom to begin digging through the closet. "you were telling me about that high end beef place in gangnam the other day-"

"woo tender?" you asked, eyes big. "isn't that a little fancy for a wednesday?"

he pointed at you. "i knew you'd say that. but i looked into it, and turns out they give free dessert if you get engaged during dinner."

you stared at him for a second, thinking about how you had told him in the past that if he even tried to ask you to marry him before year five you would break up with him, and the further caveat that if he tried to propose in public you would say no on principle. "joshua."

"not for real," he said, making a face like you were insane for even thinking he would suggest it. "i just thought you might like today more if we could put on the 'can't wait for marriage' act to get free food."

you pushed our lips to one side of your face, fiddling with your towel and giving him one of those looks that he could never look away from. "that actually sounds really fun."

he made a fist in victory, backing towards the door. "pick out something nice to wear, i'll match you. i have to make sure they have a table real fast. you don't happen to have a ring, do you?"

you looked over to the dresser, where a tray of jewelry sat. "yours wouldn't fit any of my fingers, huh?"

"well, it's only the one finger that matters," joshua pointed out, eyebrows raised, and you giggled at him. "it's fine, we can find a shitty one on the way."

that made you laugh out loud. "so romantic," you said, shoulder popping up to your chin sassily.

"only the best for you," he winked, finger gun being the last thing you saw as he left.

the statement was repeated later, joshua's tone facetious and teasing as he shoved coins into a gacha machine in your local mall, the pair of you being massively overdressed to be betting on which squishy gudetama your spare change was going to gift you. you wanted the rolled omelet - of course, who wouldn't? - but that was exactly why joshua was positive you would never get it. you had already placed the almost convincing ring that had popped out of the previous machine on your finger, it's greatest giveaway being the plastic seam you could feel between your knuckles, but glittered vaguely in the light in a way that you were sure emulated a real stone. if you kept moving, no one would be able to notice that the silver had no depth to it.

joshua sucked his lips between his teeth, exerting much more effort on the reusable capsule than one would think it needed. he huffed when it popped open, displaying the contents as you both peeked in.

"oh my god!" you giggled, immediately picking the little rolled omelet out of the capsule and tearing open the plastic packaging. "gudetamagoyaki!"

joshua stared at you. "that's insane. i've watched seokmin pull eight of the steamed egg squishes out of this exact machine."

you thought for a second. "well, yeah. we're each others' good luck charm."

he laughed, an endeared light in his eyes as he watched you gesture between the two of you. he put the capsule in the provided bin on top of the machines and fell into step beside you as you left the gacha arcade. "please elaborate."

"your promotion," you said immediately, hooking your arm under his as he took the inanimate animated egg from you to squish between his fingers. "you got the editor position because you came back for a proper kiss."

he turned his head to you, and there was a laugh just threatening to burst from his lips at the sight of your proud face. "right, nothing to do with my years of dedicated work, aggressive networking, and sheer ambition. not like i went to college for this exact reason or whatever."

"exactly," you agreed, as if he had just stated that the sky was blue, displaying your ringed finger in front of you as you exited the mall and headed towards the car. "and you were my first viral video."

joshua's head cocked as he stared at your hand. "now that's true."

you looked over to him. "so was the other one."

he smiled at you. "right."

you looked back at the ring. "this is so goofy."

he laughed as you pulled it off your finger, putting it in his outstretched palm as he led you across the parking lot. "it only has to be convincing for half an hour."

you chewed your cheek, spotting joshua's car right where the two of you had left it. "and i have to say yes to get the dessert?"

joshua rolled his eyes dramatically. "alright, you can walk home."

"i'm kidding!" you laughed, tugging on his arm, and he let a sly smile sneak through his annoyed facade, hand fishing in the pocket of his pants to unlock the car. "i won't be able to say no when you ask me for real, so i might not get the chance again."

a smirk stretched across his face as he pulled open the passenger door. "you act like we won't absolutely pull this scam again."

you laughed, telling him he was so right, and rewarding his chivalry with a quick kiss on his upturned lips before dropping into the car.

joshua's hand always found you. it wasn't even a conscious action for him anymore, you were pretty sure - a habit at this point, a natural proclivity to brushing his fingers over the small of your back to prompt you to distractedly step up in line at a café, or rubbing his thumbs into your shoulders when he checked on you while you edited on the weekends. today, his hand slid over your thigh as soon as he had navigated back to a main road, a sign that he had settled into the drive. he peeked over at you when you put your palm over his hand, squeezing at his fingers, and he squeezed your thigh back when you gave him a tiny smile.

"feel any better?" he asked, checking his side mirror quickly as he merged.

you let out a breath. "a lot better. thank you for this."

"i'm being selfish," he said quickly, making you sputter out a laugh that got him to join you. "have you seen their sweets platter? i need to eat those donuts." 

and while the dessert was the purpose of visiting gangnam on this particular wednesday, everything else about the meal was just as beautiful and delicious as you hoped it would be. you felt ridiculous, absolutely, spending way too much money for a gourmet meal on a random week night just for the idea of a free dessert, but perhaps that inside joke was part of what made the evening so fun. being able to make quick eye contact that only had meaning between the two of you, stifling a giggle that made him smile and clear his throat. the plates you had been sharing were almost empty, signifying a nearing end to your stay in gangnam and the question you had been waiting for all night.

"here," joshua said, pushing the entree plate towards you lightly. "the steak was good, you eat the last of it."

you pouted at him. "are you sure? you can have it."

he shook his head at you. "saving space," he said, hand on his stomach and giving you a subtle wink. you giggled and picked up your fork to make the last perfect bite. he watched you stab the last bit of greens and meat, scooping up as much of the sauce as you could before depositing the whole affair in your mouth, and he grinned when you made a noise of enjoyment. "it looks tastier when you eat, anyways."

"this is why i like eating with you," you said after you swallowed, fully savoring the rich sauce and tender meat. "usually i'm the one making other people take the last bite."

he gave you a look - the look, you realized, the one he gave you when he was about to say something brain meltingly cheesy that would always make you giggle and hit him playfully. your name dripped with honey, a sweet song from his lips, and despite knowing exactly what was coming, having already rehearsed your parts of the act in your head before getting seated, you couldn't help but feel slightly caught off guard, heart racing when his hand reached for you across the table and when his eyes met yours. "can you promise to share meals with me for the rest of our lives?"

you blinked helplessly at him, his smile widening at how shell shocked you looked. he slid off his chair, hand still holding yours as he gently got down on one knee beside your table. "joshua, what are you-"

"darling," he interrupted, eyebrows raised playfully at you, one hand reaching back to fish the trinket out of his sports coat's pocket. "i'll always let you have the last bite, so," he paused a second, looking up at you, and you could have sworn there was something genuine behind the almost awe struck chuckle that fell from his curved lips. "do me the honor of staying by my side."

your breath caught, and if you didn't feel the eyes of neighboring tables on you, you probably would have smacked the shit out of him for flustering you like that in public. but you fancied yourself an actor, so instead, you pushed your palm to your face as you conjured tears to your waterline. you even let yourself get caught up in the magic of the moment as he pulled the ring forward, the dim lighting of the restaurant making it even more believable than you had expected, your eyes flashing between it and joshua. you started to nod, small at first, then firmer when you finally laughed out a yes.

people were clapping, you were pretty sure, when joshua scraped the plastic ring onto your finger, grinning wide as you both stood, his arms naturally running up your body and catching you in the kind of hug that could make your knees go weak. and even though you had an innate distaste for the relationship checkpoints society projected on romance, and even though joshua had agreed instantly that he didn't think you were the kind of couple that needed a ring and a piece of paper to prove that they love each other, and even though this was all just a scam to get free dessert, you still broke your rule about public affection. your fingers combed through the hair on the back of his head, and you pulled away from the hug just enough to kiss him.

joshua seemed shocked for just a second by your vigor, and if he commented on it later you would absolutely tell him it was just for the performance, but he sunk into your lips, his hand running over your waist. 

he hummed when you pulled away. "that steak sauce was really good."

"gross, joshua," you laughed, gently pushing him back to his seat with a cheesy grin on his face.

it took less than three minutes for the prophesied dessert platter to arrive, complete with chocolate writing that congratulated you on your (fake) engagement and an assurance that it was on the house from the waitress - though joshua was more interested in the donuts than the sentiment. he immediately swiped the pastry through the chocolate ganache script for the flavor benefit, and for just a moment, a sweet thought floated through your head as his entire face dropped in shock before he solemnly told you they were absolutely insane. you giggled before selecting one yourself, swiping it similarly through the ganache, and though you would never say it out loud, there was no one on the planet you would rather devote the rest of your sweet thoughts to.

even if the engagement was a scam.

[cellythefloshie]

If you were on the bachelorette what hockey boys would you want to be able to date and choose from? And who do you give your final rose to?

Hey Nonnie! This question has to be the most fun question I have ever received in my ask box. I have put too much thought into my list and the reasons why certain players would not be the recipient of my rose from night one to the final rose. So buckle up dashboard, you’re about to watch an entire season of my Bachelorette season in one post. Disclosure: I have not watched the Bachelor/Bachelorette in a very very long time. This is based on faded memories and quick google searches. 

Meet the Contestants 

Ross Colton - of Robinsville, NJ. Currently bottom six forward of the Tampa Bay Lightning. 

Anthony Cirelli - of Etobicoke, Ontario. Currently top six forward of the Tampa Bay Lightning. 

Brayden Point - of Calgary, Alberta. Currently top six forward of the Tampa Bay Lightning. 

Andrei Svechnikov - of Barnaul, Russia. Currently tops six forward of the Carolina Hurricanes. 

Vince Dunn - Lindsay, Ontario. Currently one half of the top defensive pair of the Seattle Kraken. 

Adam Lowry - of Calgary, Alberta (I know he was born in St Louis but he was raised in Calgary, Okay?). Currently Botton six forward of the Winnipeg Jets (and hopefully the future captain). 

Timo Meir - of Herisau, Switzerland. Currently top six forward of the New Jersey Devils. 

Matt Martin - of Winsdor, Ontario. Currently bottom six forward of the New York Islanders. 

Anthony Beauvillier - of Sorel-Tracy, Quebec. Currently top six forward of the Vancouver Canucks. 

Mat Barzal - of Coquitlam, British Columbia. Currently top six forward of the New York Islanders. 

Tom Wilson - of Toronto, Ontario. Currently top six forward of the Washington Capitals. 

Matthew Tkachuk - of Scottsdale, Arizona (this man has lived in so many cities because of his dad). Currently top six forward of the Florida Panthers. 

Jeremy Swayman - of Anchorage, Alaska. Currently the backup goaltender of the Boston Bruins. 

Pierre Luc Dubois - of Sainte-Agathe-des-Monts, Quebec. Currently, desperately, trying to get traded from the Winnipeg Jets to the Montreal Canadiens. 

Nico Hischier - of Naters, Switzerland. Currently top six forward, and Captain of the New Jersey Devils. 

Brady Skjei - of Lakeville Minnesota. Currently a defenceman of the Carolina Hurricanes. 

Pat Maroon - of St Louis, Missouri. Currently bottom six forward of the Tampa Bay Lightning. 

Chris Kreider - of Boxford, Massachussetts. Currently top six forward of the New York Rangers. 

Pytor Kotchetkov - of Penza, Russia. Currently the goaltender of the Chicago Wolves (AHL) and a backup goaltender for the Carolina Hurricanes. 

William Nylander - of Calgary, Alberta. Currently top six forward of the Toronto Maple Leafs. 

Leon Draisaitl - of Cologne, Germany. Currently top six forward of the Edmonton Oilers. 

Luke Schenn - of Saskatoon, Saskatchewan. Currently one half of the top defensive pair of the Toronto Maple Leafs.

Josh Anderson - of Burlington, Ontario. Currently top six forward for the Montreal Canadiens. 

Auston Matthews - of Scottsdale, Arizona. Currently top six forward of the Toronto Maple Leafs. 

Brendan Lemieux - of Denver, Colorado. Currently button six forward of the Philadelphia Flyers. 

The First Night

At the end of the first night, the 25 contestants would become 15, with 10 NHL hotties failing to receive my affection in the form of a rose: 

Timo Meir - we know his reputation. This man is a womanizer, and it’s clear when he tried to go in for a kiss during our first conversation. But we’re here for love. For commitment. So he had to go. 

Pierre-Luc Dubois - speaking of commitment. This man doesn’t know the definition of that. He can’t commit to a team, he can’t commit to me. Au revoir.

Leon Draisaitl - this man is so intimidating to me. I wouldn’t have the confidence to pursue anything of any nature.  

Pat Maroon - his energy would be too much for me. Confident, successful, and ready to party. I wouldn’t be able to keep up. 

Luke Scheen - is a sweet guy, but wouldn’t do much to set himself apart from the rest. 

Josh Anderson - would have flashed his abs at least once during the night - and I would have noticed but it wouldn't be enough to set him apart from the rest of the guys who go the extra mile to set themselves apart. 

Nico Hischier - a sweet guy. Very gentlemanly. But he’s a little young for me so he doesn’t receive a rose. 

Auston Matthews - Auston would come in so confident he would come off as cocky. Would brag about his friendship with Justin Beiber and would come dressed in an expensive sweatsuit instead of a suit like the other contestant. Would not be a vibe. 

Brendan Lemieux - during the first night. Brendan Lemieux and Matthew Tkachuk got into a physical altercation regarding the biting incident with Brady Tkachuk. Production wanted to kick them both off the show, but instead, they were allowed to stay until the end of the night where Tkachuk was the only one of the two to receive the rose. 

Pytor Kochetkov - my sweet sweet Pytor. He would have needed Svechnikov to translate for him all night. So kind and sweet, but the language barrier was strong and Svechnikov would have needed to be a constant third wheel to make it work - plus he’s kind I can’t decide if he is baby brother vibes or not. He would not receive the final rose of the evening. 

Season Highlights

Andrei Svechnikov secured the first kiss on the first night with his charm, maturity and his kindness in helping Pytor through the night when he could have been selfish 

Andrei also received the first rose of the season before the first rose ceremony was held

Vince Dunn would be a quick fan favorite but not without controversy - there would be a call to action from fans that wanted him to be sent home but he would remain on the show after making a public apology at the rose ceremony

Anthony Beauvillier and Mat Barzal would go on a 2 on 1 date with me, some kind of outdoorsy thing with paddleboarding and it would have been a great time BUT they would both go home that same night after Beauvillier refuses the rose on the date. Their friendship ultimately gets in the way of their pursuit of love

Ross Colton would fail to receive a rose after a group date that involved an extensive hike in the wilderness

Tkachuk would continue to be an instigator for the season starting conflicts and pushing the buttons of other contenders. It would lead to Tom Wilson and Matt Martin not receiving roses but he would be the one not to receive a rose when a conflict with Lowry would arise. Lowry would receive the final rose that night, sending Tkachuk home. 

Chris Kreider would try to propose midseason and his eagerness and willingness to commit so early would be a red flag, he would not receive a rose at the following ceremony

After regret and complications, Ross Colton would be welcomed back onto the show as I would feel like failing to give him a rose was a mistake

With the welcoming back of Ross to the show, William Nylander would be sent home as a result

On a 1 on 1 date with Brady Skeji things would look to become more intimate than it actually was and viewers would be shocked when he would not receive a rose later than night

During what would be the rose ceremony that would bring it down to the final 4 it is revealed that it would be a final 5 with only 7 contenders remaining: Ross Colton, Anthony Cirelli, Adam Lowry, Andrei Svechnikov, Brayden Point, Jeremy Swayman and Vince Dunn

Viewers would be shocked when Anthony Cirelli would receive the final rose before the final four over Brayden Point who had been a front-runner for your heart since night one

The Final Five

Usually the final four, but would be changed last minute as I struggled to make the decision, it would be time to travel and meet the families of the final 5 contestants. 

Ross Colton - the trip would take me to New Jersey where I would meet his parents and his brother Rob. They would be welcoming, and kind, but it would be very clear how many worlds apart we are and it would plant some insecurities of just how well I would be able to fit into their lifestyle and expectations. 

Anthony Cirelli - back in Canada, I would meet his family, and very importantly Grandma Cirelli who is known for her tomato sauce. We would cook a meal together in their family kitchen - and she would approve of my cooking. 

Vince Dunn - A mere hour away from where we visited Tony’s family, I would meet Dunn’s. It’s a smaller city and feels familiar to what I’ve grown up in BUT everyone seems to know him there. It’s weird being there with a local celebrity because there is no just blending into a big city here. His family would be as kind and welcoming as the others, and I’d get to see more of his emotional side that we would have seen glimmer off throughout the season.

Adam Lowry - in Calgary we would meet his family, a very strong hockey family, with his dad having played and coached and his brother having played as well. It’s their lives, and will always be a part of it. We would see just how good he is with his nieces and nephews and go to see the mountains in Banff. 

Andrei Svechnikov - the final trip would take me to Russia where I would meet his parents, his brother and his brother’s family. It would be a breathtaking trip, one like any other seen on the show but it would be conflicting as his mother would show her concerns. I would not be what his mother imagined for her sweet boy, and her approval is very important to him. And the larger age gap would be revisited. 

After the trips, it would come to the rose ceremony that would bring the final 5 down to the final two. That night, Andrei would fail to receive a rose, the age gap and the pressure of his mother being too much. Ross, while an obvious favourite for the majority of the season would not receive a rose, the high maintenance feel of his family too much and too intimidating to commit to at that moment - and the goodbye is one not without tears. The viewers would be shocked again when Tony would receive the final rose, sending Lowry back to the off-season. His familiar pressure of their legacy all too much even though seeing him with his nephews would given me absolute baby fever. 

Then only two remained: Anthony Cirelli and Vince Dunn. 

The Final Rose

The final rose would be one of great controversy with lots of viewers seeming to think I was making a mistake moving forward with my final two. That I had greater chemistry with other players that I had sent walking and that whoever I chose would be a decision made in regret. But I was left to make the choice between the two final contenders. Anthony Cirelli. The sweet, respectable boy from Vaughn. Who maybe wasn’t as traditionally handsome as the other contestants - but I’m a sucker for those curls. Who loves Kygo and partying in Miami but will always value his family and their traditions above all else. 

And then there was Vince. The mildly problematic, handsome man - who also has those oh-so-dangerous curls and those bright eyes. He can be wild, but also sweet - and always so intense with emotions that you can see so clearly written across his face. A man who can enjoy the outdoors as much as a night at the club. 

And while Tony and Ross both very clearly have a piece of my heart I need a man who is going to be able to go out there and enjoy nature with me. Someone who won’t care that I don’t spend an hour in front of the mirror to do my hair and my makeup every day. Someone who will love my cooking, and isn’t afraid of his emotions or to have tough conversations. 

And for those reasons, I would have to give my final rose to… Vince.