#just a bit of steddie for the soul <3

[justmeinadaze]

Aftercare: Safeword (Steddie X You)

Warnings: Daddy Steve/Sir Eddie & Sub reader, SMUT, As the title suggests the safe word is used here, the smut they are engaging in isn't too rough she just feels uncomfortable mostly with how they are grabbing her and seem "not all there", choking, mentions of overstimulation without praise, brief dp, later on more romantic softer smut, dirty talk, etc, FLUFF, they love each other <3, aftercare after use of the safe word, ANGST, mentions of past toxic relationships, both boys talk about things that are stressing them out.

More than anything this is them teaching her more about aftercare and how there is nothing wrong with needing to use a safe word. That no matter what they still love her. That goes for you beautiful souls to! Its ok to use your word if you have one and if your partner gets mad at you for it, like Eleven says, dump their ass!

Word Count: 3779

Something was off. They both seemed out of sorts when they got home from work but you didn’t think anything of it at the time. You just did what you could to make them feel better. Eddie came home first and bypassed you entirely to fall onto his bed. You crawled in beside him and laid your head on his chest as he remained still, not even playing with your hair like he normally did. 

Steve soon followed, finding you both and curling up behind you as he threw his arm around your waist; his breathing ragged almost like he was angry. After a while, without saying a word, they tugged off your clothes, and began to use you. That was the best way to describe their desperate touches and rough kisses. 

Their vacant eyes rarely met yours as they made you cum repeatedly. You cried at the overstimulation and where they would usually coo and comfort you, this time they were silent.

They were both inside of you thrusting aggressively. You were already extremely sore and knew you would be for the next few days to come. 

You thought you could make it to the end and allow them to finish but they made you promise if ever you felt uncomfortable to use the safe word. Eddie’s fingers were gripping your bicep a bit too tightly and Steve’s hand around your throat was starting to cut off your air supply. 

You tried to say “red” but it wasn’t coming out loud enough to be heard. Going to plan B, you squeezed your eyes shut as you lifted your palm above you and smacked Eddie’s headboard three times as hard as you could. 

They stopped moving, freezing in place, and you tapped at the hand around your neck signaling the concern. 

“Shit. Fucking…Y/N, I’m so sorry.” He released his grip and gradually pulled out of you before running out of the room to the kitchen. 

Eddie pulled out as well, brushing your hair out of your face as you coughed trying to collect air.

“It’s ok, sweetheart. Everything’s ok.”

Steve quickly came back, sinking to his knees by the mattress as he handed you a glass of water. 

“Here, honey, drink this. Good girl. What else do you need, baby?”

It was then that you started to bawl and their hearts broke as you hugged your arms around your body. Eddie kept whispering that you were safe as he gently petted your head while Steve covered you with a throw blanket and rubbed your back. 

“I’m sorry.”, you whimper as you wipe your eyes with your fist. “I tried. I really did but you both were hurting me.”

“Hey, hey, hey. No reason to be sorry. We’re so proud of you for using the safe word and getting our attention. I know you said it used to be hard for you before, pretty girl.” Steve grinned at you comfortingly as he continued to try and calm you down. 

“I-I-I ruined everything.”

“No, princess. You didn’t ruin anything. You feeling safe and comfortable is more important to us than anything else.”

You softly smile at them as you slide to the edge and try to get up but your legs betray you as you fall back down. 

“Baby, we got you. Where are you trying to go?”

“Bath. Hurts.”

“Ok, I’m going to carry you. Is that alright?”

You nod as Steve lifts you into his arms and Eddie runs ahead to get your bath started in your bathroom since your tub is bigger (and cleaner) than his. The boy continues to hold you in his arms until everything is in place before gently lowering you into the water. 

Your eyes shift towards them before quickly looking away as your bottom lip quivers. 

“Talk to us, princess. What do you need?”

“Sit with me… hold me…hurting.”

They climb in without hesitation and promptly collect you in their arms. It was always slightly amusing for them to see how you behaved in this headspace. Eddie had only ever really dealt with brats who threw tantrums. You were far from a brat and due to your history with your exes, you seemed to close into yourself and close off. That was hard for them because they needed you to be vocal and tell them what you needed so they could help make you feel better.

They never wanted to push you this far and they knew they fucked up. 

Eddie pressed your head to his chest while Steve laid his own on your shoulder. You sat with them until the water got cold and even then they didn’t move till you said you were ready. They carefully dried you off before putting some baggy clothes on you and carrying you to the living room. 

“Are you hungry, baby? We have some frozen pizza in there I think.” The metalhead sighs when you don’t respond. “How about we make it and then if you’re hungry later at least it will be ready.”

Steve immediately headed for the kitchen and your eyes turn to watch him, noticing his hands shake as he carefully reads the box he’s holding. Eddie pushes some of your hair behind your ear before telling you he’ll be right back and heading towards his friend. They whisper to each other but you just barely make out what they are saying. 

“Harrington, you have to calm down. She’s not upset with us but herself. She thinks she did something wrong by using her safe word.”

“Eddie, she couldn’t even say the word because of me. I didn’t mean to hurt her.”

“I know and she knows that to but in her headspace right now she doesn’t understand that. She sees you panicking and she thinks it’s because you didn’t get to cum.”, he sighs. “Blame those fucking idiots she dated. I imagine if she didn’t know what aftercare was, if she had used the safe word with any of them they would have just left her there.”

Steve’s fist clenched at the thought but when his gaze shifted to you he noticed you watching them and flashed you a big Harrington smile with a wink. To his relief, you softly smiled in return. 

Eddie came back to sit beside you, grabbing the remote and turning on the tv.

“I don’t know what would be on right now but—” Your hand reached out to stop him and his smile grew when you curled up into his side. “’Unsolved Mysteries’. Let’s see who got kidnapped by aliens tonight.”

“Aliens aren’t real, Ed.”, Steve scolded as he came around the corner and flopped down on the couch. 

“Pfft. Non-believer.” The longhaired boy rolls his eyes as you grin but he doesn’t miss the slight wince when his fingers run down your arm. 

***

By the time the show ended, you had returned to your old self as you giggled at their banter and ate the food they offered.

“Steve, I agree with Eddie there totally is aliens out there but I’m going to need you to make sure if I disappear you search through the human world first! Don’t let him get distracted!”

“Honey, if you went missing I would move heaven and earth to find you.”

That made you genuinely smile as Eddie continued to play with your hair. The other man bounced back beside you, holding an icepack and gestured for your arm. 

“Oh, it’s ok. I’m ok.”

“Sweetheart, you’re right. It is ok. Let Stevie see your arm.”

“I don’t want you guys to be sad. You do so much for me…I can…I can take care of it myself.”

“My love, do you remember what we told you after we play rough?”

“But, but—”

“What did we say, Y/N?”

“Aftercare is important afterwards. Not just for me but you guys to. But, Steve, you guys made me cum so many times and neither of you got finish.”

“Princess, that is literally the last thing on our minds right now. All we care about is that you feel safe and that you aren’t in pain. You didn’t do anything wrong by giving us the signal and getting our attention. Can you say that for me?”

“I did nothing wrong by signaling for us to stop.”

“Good girl.”, Eddie kisses your temple. “You still deserve to be taken care of after no matter what, babe. It’s just a little bit different because Steve and I need to see you and hear from you to fully understand so this doesn’t happen again.”

You nodded in understanding as you lifted up your sleeve. “Eddie was holding me to tightly and it hurt.”

The metalhead shifted his body to sit across from you on the coffee table so he could get a better look before Steve covered it with ice. Purple fingerprints were starting to form around your bicep and he could see the little indents from his fingernails digging into your skin. 

“Sweetie, I’m so sorry. I didn’t even realize.”

You turned a bit and pulled down your collar exposing your throat a bit more. They could both see the imprint of where Steve’s hand had been. 

“I couldn’t breathe.”

“I didn’t realize either. Shit…I was so lost in my own head, honey—”

“That bothered me the most. You two were so quiet and your eyes seemed so vacant. Eddie usually you give me a kiss when you come home but you went straight to your bedroom. When we lay together, you play with my hair or touch my skin but neither of you did that. When you kept making me cum and I started to cry, you both soothe me or praise me but you didn’t this this time. It felt…weird like…I was with two different men.”

They both exhaled heavily as they absorbed what you were saying. 

“I almost got fired today.” You and Steve sat at attention at his comment. “Someone broke into the record store and stole a bunch of shit but instead of leaving it there they spray painted ‘Freak’ on the wall as well as some satanist symbols, I don’t even know.”, Eddie rolled his eyes. “My boss said this isn’t the kind of attention he wants and he may have to let me go. I had to beg literally almost on my knees for him to keep me on.”

“Baby, I’m so sorry.”, you comforted. 

“I hate this fucking town. They’re never going to see me as anything else than fucking trailer trash. I felt so helpless and I took that out on you, sweetheart. I am so fucking sorry.”

“My dad showed up at the video store today and embarrassed me in front of Robin. He said that if I couldn’t get into college then I should come intern with him and learn the trade. Like that asshole would ever hand over his company to me. I’m never going to be good enough for him.”

“You’re good enough for us, Stevie. You’re more than enough.”, you coo as you reach for his hand. 

“I took that out on you to, honey. I’m sorry. I needed to feel more in control and… God this fucking kills me.”, he sighs as his fingers trace the skin along your neck. “This is never going to happen again, Y/N. I promise.”

“Me to.”, Eddie follows. “And we are really proud of you for using your safe word and following those steps we put in place.”

“I love you.”

The metalhead climbs back on to the sofa as both boys wrap their arms obnoxiously around you making you giggle.

#################

The next couple of days they continued to look after you making sure you were alright and constantly trying to make up for hurting you. Steve came home one day with flowers while Eddie bought you a cute little silver bracelet he knew you’d love. 

That Friday evening when you got off of work, you walked into your apartment met with dimmed lights and candles lit on the table. 

“Um, what is happening?”, you smile as you walk towards the counter that has a note with your name on it. 

“Baby Girl,

In your room is present #1 of the evening. Go put it on, beautiful.

We love you. 

-Eddie X Steve”

You blush as you run excitedly towards your bedroom to find a flat box with a bow on top. Gasping when you pull it open, you hold up the gorgeous red dress with matching flats and spin around giddily as you quickly put it on. 

While you’re a adjusting your make up in the bathroom, a clearing throat grabs your attention. 

“Oh wow.”, you grin as your eyes fall upon Eddie in a suit. “You look handsome.”

“Thank you, sweetheart. I’m not as good looking as you though.” The metalhead extends his elbow and you gladly loop your arm through his as he leads you back out into the living room where an equally well-dressed Steve was waiting. 

“Oh, baby, you look amazing.”, you coo as he grins in your direction. 

“Me? That dress looked gorgeous in the store but it looks even better on you.”

He comes around to kiss your cheek before guiding you to your table that was fancied up with a white tablecloth. Beaming over at them, you watched as they moved about the kitchen, whispering to each other, and finally coming back to you with a plate of delicious looking food.

“Did you guys make this?”

“Princess, the apartment is still standing and isn’t on fire so no.”, Eddie chuckled. “We ordered it from your favorite place but instead of eating out of Styrofoam we upped the ante by putting it on plates.”

You giggled when he winked at you and patiently waited for them to take a seat so you could eat together. 

“Not that I don’t appreciate this but may I ask why?”

“We just…we love you and we wanted to show you how much we appreciate you.”, Steve smiles as he reaches for your hand.

“We also wanted to show you how proud we are of you. We know you’ve been through a lot, Y/N but you’ve come so far in being more open with us and you’ve even shown us some things as well. Like Harrington said, we love you…so much.”

“I love you to.”

The three of you continued to talk as you ate your meal. Eddie said he was able to smooth things over with his boss and stayed behind a few extra hours to help get his store back in order. Steve told his dad to politely fuck off and asked Robin to help him search for some career options that would work best for him. You were always so proud of them, never caring what they did for a living but just wanted them to be happy. 

“Thank you so much for dinner. It was really good.”, you beam at them as they clear the table and start cleaning up the area. 

“I’m glad you enjoyed it, honey. We were thinking once we get everything put away here, maybe, we could watch a movie or something.”

“Baby, we got all dressed up, you went all out on dinner, and now you just want to sit down and watch a movie?”

“Oh, um, I mean did you want to go somewhere, sweetheart?”

Leaning over the counter, you look up at them with big doe eyes.

“My bedroom…or the couch…Hell, even the counter here. I don’t care.”, you giggle.

“How are you feeling?”, Steve asks as his eyes shift towards your neck. The bruises had long since faded but you could tell he could still see them almost as if that image would never go away.

“Horny it seems.”, Eddie laughs making you smile.

Coming around to their side, the metalhead lifts you onto the island and you reach for the other boy, clasping your arms around his neck.

“I’m feeling much better, Daddy. I promise. You don’t have to keep punishing yourself for what happened. You both took such good care of me. Please, let me take care of you.”

As you bring his lips to yours, his palms slide down to the small of your back and pull you towards the edge closer to his waist. A whimper escapes your throat as the growing bulge in his pants steadily grinds against your uncovered core; the fabric of his slacks rubbing just enough on your clit to have you opening your legs wider to allow him more access.

“Does that feel good, baby girl? Fuck. I can feel you soaking through my pants.”

“Y-You should take them off then.”, you breathily laugh as he rests his forehead on yours, smiling at your neediness. “Please, Daddy. I want you so bad.”

A low growl emits from Steve’s throat as he quickly fumbles with his belt buckle and frees his leaking cock from its confinement. Your mouth falls open as you both watch him guide his length into you entrance and your hands cup his face as your legs wrap around his waist. 

“Yes, baby. You feel so good.”, you moan as your fingers unbutton the top half of his shirt so your hands can roam his chest, making him mewl as his head falls into your neck and he thrusts into you at a bit faster.

Eddie’s own fingers come from the side and delicately move your hair behind your ear.

“You’re so beautiful, princess. I like watching your face when we’re fucking you. I love that you’re ours.”

Your eyes fluttered shut as you hugged Steve tighter to your body. 

“Don’t—mmm—don’t worry about me tonight. I want you both to cum.”

Freezing completely, the man in your arms tilted back so his gaze could meet yours. 

“Honey, what do you think helps get us there? We like making you fall apart.”

“That’s an understatement.”, Eddie adds making Steve chuckle. 

“It fucking drives me crazy feeling your soft hands and nails drag along my skin.”, he whispers, gradually pumping into you again as his palms cling to your hips. “Those tiny whimpers you make when I hit that spot inside of you right there.”

Between his last couple of words, he thrust into you roughly making your toes curl against him. 

“That’s it, pretty girl. Cum for me. Cum for Daddy.” 

Going back his original rhythm, you nuzzled your face into his shoulder, muffling your moans as you did what he asked. 

“Fuck, Y/N. The way your pussy grips me when you cum.” Placing his hand on the back of your head and his other arm wrapped around your back, he presses you to him while chasing his high. Steve’s heavy pants warm your ear and both of you groan as he fills you up. 

Releasing you from his hold, he leans back to tenderly kiss your lips before backing away so Eddie could take his place. After light heartedly giggling through his teeth, he grabs a napkin off the counter and dabs at your forehead. 

“So sweaty.”

“Aren’t you about to make me sweatier?”, you tease.

Grinning, he takes you in his arms and carries you into the living room where he playfully tosses you down on the sofa where he lifts off your dress. 

“Wait.”, you plead as he began unbuttoning his shirt. “Leave it on like he did. It’s…kind of hot…makes me feel…small. In a good way!”

“Whatever you want, baby.”

As he takes a seat on the couch, he pulls down his pants and boxers enough to free his cock before motioning for you to come sit on his lap. After positioning you with your back against his chest and placing your legs on either side of his own, Eddie takes hold of his length as you lift your hips slightly and slide down onto him. 

“Oh my god.”

“Atta girl, princess. Fuck. So fucking wet and warm.”, he murmurs in your ear as your head leans against his shoulder.

Ring lined fingers dig into your thighs as your roll your lower body slowly, enjoying the feeling of his cock stretching your walls and rubbing your g-spot just so. 

“Ride my dick, sweetheart. Make yourself cum.”

Tilting forward, you balance your hands on his knees as you bounce on his lap. 

“Yes. You feel so good, Sir.”

“You know, Y/N, I love watching you come undone to. The way your body moves and trembles. The way you moan my name or title. How your pussy trenches my cock. Shit, baby.”

Tugging your hair, he yanks you against him again as he brings his fingers around to massage your clit.

“FUCK! Please, Sir, please.”, you beg. 

As your orgasm washes over you, his digits move faster as he roughly thrusts up into you to elongate your high. Falling limply against him, Eddie holds you to him until his rhythm starts to falter and you feel his spend warm your insides. 

While he tries to catch his breath, your lips lazily trail along his jaw line till he turns to meet your mouth with his own.

Lost in your bliss, you allow them to carry you to your bathroom and take care of you. As you stood in the shower your arms remained around them as they cleaned you and placed soft kisses along your skin. 

“Thank you for always listening and taking care of me. Even before we got together you guys have always been good friends to me.”

After changing your clothes and placing you under the covers in your bed, they climb in on either side of you and take you in their arms. 

“You’re welcome. I don’t know about Stevie but I wish I had told you earlier how I felt about you…could have saved you from a lot of heartache.”, Eddie sighs. 

“I was afraid you wouldn’t like me the same way and I’d lose you. That’s why I never said anything but, yeah, I wish I had said something sooner. I remember once you told us you thought you didn’t deserve to be happy and that just killed me. I thought ‘we could make her happy.’”

“You do…both of you…you always have. I know we can’t go back in time but I have you now and that’s all I care about. For the past view months, I’ve actually felt the safest I’ve ever been. Not just physically but mentally and emotionally. I can be open with your guys about anything and I know you still love me. I hope you know you can do that same with me. I’m always here for you no matter what.”

##############

@goth-cowgirl-03

Series here

[transmascsteveharrington]

steddie percy jackson au part 3 (part 1) (part 2)

The years come and go, kids grow up, teenage heroes turn into adult demigods, the wheel of time spins. They’re twenty-five by the time they decide to get married. Summer wedding at the camp. They both no longer live there, moved into a small but lovely apartment in Boston. But the camp is still the place they associate with home the most.

They get married at the lake, right at the edge of the camp border so that Wanye can come be a part of the celebration. Steve's dad, to no one's surprise, doesn't show. Steve can't even remember the last time they talked, isn't sure the phone number scribbled down on a half-dissolved paper is still the right one, doesn't really care though. His dad might be a no show, but his mom is here. Pretty in pink, celestial, soft eyes and even softer smile.

Steve is no longer just Aphrodite's little padawan. He is her child, her son. She's come down from Olympus to bless Steve's and Eddie's union. There still is not really a need for it, the red string tied around Steve and Eddie’s pinkies is sturdy as ever.

But Aphrodite has seen Steve and Eddie fall in love and be torn apart too many times before. She’s seen Steve get bitten by a venomous snake and heard Eddie sing in mourning, the sound beautifully that stones had wept. She’s seen Eddie lead Steve out of the underworld only to lose him again at the very very last second.

She’s seen them grow up together, not unlike now, boys easily falling into each other, body and soul. Boys being forced to go to battle, boys forced apart too soon. She’ll never unsee the harrowing fear in Steve’s face as Eddie bled out in his arms in front of the gates of Troye.

She’s seen them court each other, love each other, unaware of the looming shadow of jealousy whispering in the wind. She’s seen Eddie lose his life during a harmless game of discus, seen Steve try to preserve Eddie’s memory by turning him into hyacinths.

There are hyacinths all around during the wedding even though it’s been months since spring. A special gift from the dryads. Even after all those lives, hyacinths are still Steve’s favorite. Aphrodite thanks the fates for spinning a longer thread for Steve and Eddie in this life.

After the wedding, Steve doesn't see Aphrodite for a while. Another titan rising, another war, more loss, sometimes it feels like the fight is never-ending. But the gods and their children emerge victorious once more. Steve especially. He was the hero that got to slay the titan.

He gets called up to the Olympus to receive praise and honour and gifts from the gods. They haven't told Steve specifically to bring Eddie, but Steve doesn't go anywhere without his husband now a day. Especially not after almost losing him in the last war, a swarm of furies digging their teeth and claws into his torso.

"Not yet," Steve had sobbed on the battlefield.

"Not yet," Hermes and Aphrodite had whispered.

"Not yet," the Fates had agreed.

When they enter the Olympus, Aphrodite is the first to greet them. She rushes out of the throne room and wraps her arms around Steve in a tight hug.

"Hi mom," he says softly as he buries his face in her curly hair. Just like their little apartment, just like cabin at camp, being in Aphrodite's arms always feels a bit like coming home.

"I love you, Stevie," she whispers before she lets go. It feels final, like a goodbye, and Steve doesn't like it one bit. Before he can ask what's up though a thunderous voice calls out from the great hall, "Steven, come in!"

Aphrodite let's go of him, pulls Eddie in a quick hug too, before she turns to the great hall.

"Best not to let them wait," she says and it almost sounds like she is on the edge of tears.

She doesn't let Steve ask, just squeezes his hand before she slips through the door. Steve turns around to give Eddie a helpless look, Eddie looks back at him with the same confusion. Aphrodite is right though, best not to let the gods wait, no matter how beloved Steve is by them.

Something is definitely off, Steve realizes as they enter the hall and walk towards the front where Hera and Zeus are sitting. The other gods that usually smile at him look sour. Some bitter, some angry, some sad. Steve desperately tries to remember if he has done anything to earn their contempt, but he comes up empty. He literally slayed a titan for them.

The only one smiling at Steve is Hera, which, nothing against Hera, is low-key a red flag. Steve has never seen her smile reach her eyes, always empty, always put on, always pretend. Steve shivers as he reaches her.

“Steven.” Even the cheer in her voice sounds fake.

“My lady,” he says and bows. It’s odd that she is addressing him and not Zeus. Zeus is just sitting next to her, looking bored. Which is yet another red flag.

“You have done a great deed, Steven,” the goddess continues and Steve wishes she would just stop calling him Steven.

Only his dad called him Steven in the few blurry memories Steve has of him. Steve could really do without those.

A deed great enough for my husband to graciously forgive you.”

“Forgive me?” Steve frowns. He can’t remember a single thing he could have done to wrong Zeus. Sure, he once dated his daughter Nancy, but she was the one to break Steve’s heart. And Zeus never seemed to be upset with Steve for that.

“And he has allowed me to claim you,” Hera ignores Steve’s question. “For you are my child.”

The words my child echo through the great hall, reverb. It takes Steve a moment to take them in and then another to fully understand them. Child. He is Hera’s child Zeus isn’t forgiving Hera for having an affair. He is forgiving Steve for existing. Steve’s too familiar with that feeling, understands now how Hera might have fallen for his mortal father. They seem to be alike.

The joy that should come with your divine parent claiming you stays out. Technically nothing much should change for Steve. He no longer lives in the camp so he won't move cabins. Every little sacrifice he brings he now has to bring to Hera. In his moments of need he will have to turn to her. It sounds like nothing, but it's everything.

Because there is no way Zeus didn't know that Steve was hers. He must have known and he never threatened Steve, always was surprisingly kind to him. Even now he doesn't look at Steve with the hatred Hera claims her husband must have for her bastard child.

Steve doesn't buy it one second that only now Zeus allowed Hera to claim him. It's only now that Steve has slain a titan, has fought more wars than he can count, that he is good enough for Hera. She isn't claiming him out of love, she is claiming him to brag, to show him around like jewelry. He wonders for a econd if she even knows his husband's name. His friend's name, hell if she even knows that yellow and umber are his favorite colors. There is no love found in her gaze.

Steve is going to do something brave, something stupid, something based on all the love he feels. He turns to Eddie briefly, an apology in his eyes. But the way Eddie looks back at him means that he knows what Steve is about to do. And that two demigods might not do much against a whole pantheon, but Eddie will always have Steve's back. Steve tells Eddie one last time I love you with his eyes, before he turns back to Zeus and Hera.

"Lord Zeus, Lady Hera," he says already tasting blood in his mouth. "Thank you for the great honor, but I believe there has to be a mistake."

Eery silence falls across the large hall.

"I already have a mother," Steve says and holds up his wrist, Aphrodite's symbol etched into his skin.

The silence continues for a moment before Hera laughs. It's cold, it's cruel, downright sadistic. Everyone knows what happens to the people that wrong Hera. Steve just hopes it'll be painless and that Eddie will be spared as Hera strikes out.

Steve presses his eyes shut, ready to accept death with open arms. Only that the strike never comes. Confused, Steve opens his eyes again. Hera is up, arm stretched out, palm ready to slap Steve, but she is unable to. Two hands wrapped around her wrist.

"Don't you dare touch my child," Aphrodite hisses, her pretty face contorted like that of a siren that has stopped singing, eyes glowing red, yellow fangs flashed.

"What she said," Hermes, who the other hand around Hera's wrist belongs to, says with just as much anger.

He never asked Steve to devote himself to him, but Steve has spent his entire life living in Hermes' cabin, he's married to one of Hermes' favorite children. As far as Hermes is concerned Steve is as much his to protect as he is Aphrodite's.

"Traitors," Hera snaps. "You would start another war amongst us? For what? Some meekly, unimportant demigod? He's barely a hero."

"I would start a hundred wars for him. Because he is my son and I love him," Aphrodite grits back, her grip so tight it's going to bruise Hera's wrist.

Steve is not surprised. He would rather die for his mother's love before he worshiped a false goddess, she would start wars for him.

"What she said," Hermes confirms again and this time it does catch Steve a little by surprise.

"Wouldn't be much of a war though," a deep voice roars behind them.

When Steve turns he sees the entire pantheon standing behind them. Usually, they are never united, loyalties split between the big three, there were bound to be gods on Hera's and Zeus' side. But every single one is standing behind Steve and his family.

Because they too watched Steve grow, they too felt for he unclaimed child, they too felt touched by his love and they too want to express their thanks for Steve's heroism. As Eddie once whispered into the darkness of the night, arms wrapped tightly around Steve, so convinced that Steve had already been asleep: "It's impossible not to love you, Steve Harrington."

Hera falters slightly, looks at Zeus for help, but Zeus still looks bored.

"I believe the pantheon has spoken. You made a mistake Hera, the child is not yours," he says before he turns to Steve. "Your business here is done, you should leave."

Steve doesn't have to be told twice. He grabs Eddie's hand and pulls him out of the hall, away from the Olympus. They don't look back. They know Aphrodite and Hermes will wait for them when they come home. Hera might still try to come for Steve, but for this life, this love, the Fates have blessed Steve with a very long thread.

[laundrybiscuits]

Just curious and i like hearing your thoughts on this stuff. May i ask what aspect of steddie fanon you're referring to (which don't fit IRL queer culture so accurately)?

Ahaha...okay so. IMPORTANT NOTE: fandom is not that crucial, do whatever you want, run free through daisy fields of whatever headcanons and characterizations you please. Also, fic is not real life and that's okay!!

That being said, fandom can get slightly weird about sex, especially queer sexual cultures and especially historical queer sexual cultures. I mean, I get it! Our current hegemonic understanding of sexuality is actually pretty recent; I studied sexuality from a sociological perspective as part of my undergrad degree, focusing on moral panics (gosh I wonder why Eddie's character arc appeals to me! so mysterious!), and I know just enough to know that I don't know shit. So I certainly don't expect anyone to be doing paradigm-shifting sociohistorical research for a fic. That would be ridiculous.

All of this is leading up to say that based on 1) the relayed experiences of queer mentors who were in the scene in the 80s 2) the secondary sources I’ve researched 3) personally having many gay male friends who love oversharing through the last ~15 years, I believe that if canon-compliant gay Eddie Munson is a virgin, it’s largely by choice. 

I've seen it suggested that Eddie's poor academic performance and nerdy interests would be, essentially, a dick deterrent. And like...I enjoy Eddie’s weirdo loser vibe as much as the next fan. I fully support him not being in any way smooth or cool with boys. But even when I myself was in my late teens/early twenties, many of my closest friends were awkward nerdy twinks who absolutely managed to get laid every weekend because MSM* hookup culture is eternal. 

And in the early 80s, when Eddie would’ve been in his late teens, MSM hookup culture was at its peak. AIDS still wasn’t being taken that seriously, and transmission etc. wasn’t really understood because…well, you know this story. It’s not a good story. Fuck Reagan. 

In short, I really can’t emphasize enough how certain types of sexual contact were extremely available for men seeking sex with men. A pretty young thing like Eddie could have literally as much sex as he wanted. Nobody is asking him for a high school transcript or anything about his hobbies, they’re asking if he tops. 

Now, would Eddie actually participate in the hookup culture of the time? That's a more complicated and speculative question, and not actually what you asked, but I'm going to talk about it briefly anyway.

In the 'yes' column: he has his own vehicle**, zero supervision, and a penchant for risky behavior.

In the 'no' column: the boy has at least three extremely involved hobbies eating up his spare time and energy; he's also a not-so-secret romantic.

Personally, I can see the pseudo-intimacy appealing to Eddie's tendency to keep people at arm's length, and I think it’s very plausible for him to be curious and experimental enough to want to explore a bit. I tend to land on 'tried it a few times, doesn't make a habit of it' in my backstories. I also tend to hint at the softer, friendlier side of hookup culture in my fics, just because I don’t often see it represented. 

Of course it’s like any other scene, there are bad actors and generally shitty people/situations, and sometimes the MSM scene specifically can be a bit of a soul-draining meat market. (ETA, because I am not white and neither are the vast majority of my friends and I felt increasingly weird not mentioning it even though it's not relevant to Eddie's situation: the scene is often also super racist, among other things! But that's a whooole other complicated kettle of fish, and again, not relevant to Eddie's situation.)

But there’s also space for casual sex to be part of a friendly relationship, in a way that I don’t really see in hetero circles. It’s hard to explain. It’s one of those dynamics that basically never shows up in mainstream media at all, so I absolutely don’t blame fics that don’t show it either. It’s just one of those things.

This is a step to the left, but I recommend checking out Dykes To Watch Out For: it’s practically an anthropological document depicting dyke culture in the 80s, it’s often funny as hell, and it’s just a fantastically detailed and relatively accessible window into a particular way of life that doesn’t really exist anymore. 

*MSM = men who have sex with men. It’s a sociological designation; not everyone in this category identifies as gay, bi, queer, etc. It may be useful to think about sexuality as having three distinct components: behavior, identity, and desire. The term “MSM” puts focus on the behavioral aspect, because it’s most relevant in this context. 

**As someone who has experienced several other countries' driving cultures, I just want to emphasize to non-Americans how willing many Americans are to drive for multiple hours for basically any reason whatsoever.

[steddieholidaydrabbles]

Week 1 Masterlist

Week one is done and you guys have been doing an incredible job! Whether you pre-wrote and scheduled posts or have been writing every single day, you deserve a hug and forehead kiss!

Please check below for the full masterlist of week one. Check the tags on them (especially for Came Back Wrong day, that was a heck of a round of submissions) and don't forget to support writers and artists by reblogging their work!

DAY 1 - OPEN MIC NIGHT

a bit of tear inducing nerd music by @lingeringmirth | Rated G | no cw | tags: modern au, fluff, lotr references, steve harrington can sing, smitten!eddie munson, nerd!steve harrington

your heart sings to mine by @steddieas-shegoes | Rated M | cw: alcohol, implied/referenced recreational drug use | tags: mutual pining, idiots to lovers, love confessions in the rain

You Say Bark, I Say Bite by @thisapplepielife | Rated T | cw: language, smoking | tags: pre-s4, pre-steddie, platonic stobin, corroden coffin

checking it twice by @cranberrymoons | Rated T | no cw | tags: coffee shop au, modern setting, established relationship

Untitled by @redlegumes | Rated T | no cw | tags: open mic, karaoke, queer bar, holiday season, Christmas

A song for the night by @atimeofyourlife | Rated T | no cw | tags: pre-steddie

I want you to want me by @sidekick-hero | Rated T | no cw | tags: exes, open but hopeful ending

open mic by @yellowsweater-bluevest (art)

DAY 2 - CAME BACK WRONG

beautiful in all its wrongness by @lingeringmirth | Rated G | cw: kas!eddie, angst, self-sacrificing steve | tags: one-sided crush (or is it?)

hide away by steddieas-shegoes | Rated M | cw: mentions of blood, canon-typical violence | tags: vampire eddie munson, emotional reunion, soul bond

sometimes dead is better by @thisapplepielife | Rated M | cw: canon death, monster!eddie, body horror | tags: horror, hurt/no comfort, dark, pet sematary vibes, dead dove:do no eat, post-s4, steve pov

Untitled by @redlegumes | Rated T | no cw | tags: steve harrington has bad parents, found family, christmas cards, holiday cards, return to sender

In the ruins by @just-my-latest-hyperfixation | Rated M | cw: apocalypse, off-screen character death, imprisonment, body horror, blood and gore, hurt/no comfort, starvation, vampirism | tags: darkfic, came back wrong, vecna won, unreliable narrator

Break it first by just-my-latest-hyperfixation with art by @house-of-the-moving-image | Rated M | cw: mind-control, brainwashing, possessive behavior, referenced character death, aftermath of trauma, aftermath of injury, kidnapping | tags: kas!eddie munson, dark eddie munson

a small surprise by @atimeofyourlife | Rated T | cw: steve has bad parents, diet culture | tags: de-aged steve harrington

peppermint chocolate by @cranberrymoons | Rated M | no cw | tags: vampire eddie, morning fluff, established relationship

disoriented and afraid by @lingeringmirth | Rated T | cw: major character death, vampire eddie, dark, dead dove: do not eat | tags: post-s4

ruins of a future once held sure by @lingeringmirth | Rated G | cw: major injury | tags: hurt eddie munson, angst, grief, injury recovery, hopeful ending, pre-steddie, post-vecna

let the impulse to love and the instinct to kill entangle to one by @sidekick-hero | Rated T | no cw | tags: fluff, first kiss, kas!eddie

his lips still blue by @klausinamarink | Rated T | cw: hypothermia, supposed character death | tags: established relationship, supernatural/horror vibes

DAY 3 - MUTUAL PINING

Pining for the Fjords by @lingeringmirth | Rated T | no cw | tags: matchmaker robin, monty python references, getting together, kissing, bisexual steve harrington, eddie munson lives

if you call me back by steddieas-shegoes | Rated T | cw: angst with a happy ending, mention of being drunk | tags: mutual pining, long distance friends, friends to lovers

Loving from afar by @atimeofyourlife | Rated G | no cw | tags: mutual pining, pre-steddie

Obviously by @thisapplepielife | Rated T | cw: brief period-typical internalized homophobia | tags: dual pov, post-season 4, idiots in love, just make a move already, platonic stobin, eddie and gareth are best friends

Take my hand (we'll make it, i swear) by @just-my-latest-hyperfixation with art by @house-of-the-moving-image | Rated G | cw: steve getting vecna'd, some violent imagery | tags: idiots in love, fluff and angst

speak a little louder by @cranberrymoons | Rated T | no cw | tags: fluff, flirting, nerds in a basement

Stolen Pine by @redlegumes | Rated E | no cw | tags: idiots in love, pining, christmas tree without glasses, light theft

DAY 4 - MEET CUTE AT WORK

stumbling into you by steddieas-shegoes | Rated M | cw: sexual innuendo, semi-public handsy making out | tags: making out, getting together, rock star eddie munson, modern au

Art by @house-of-the-moving-image

Punch me out by @just-my-latest-hyperfixation | Rated E | cw: Blowjobs, dirty talk, slight degradation kink | tags: no UD au, company christmas party, bathroom sex

Get a Grip on Yourself, Munson by @lingeringmirth | Rated T | no cw | tags: transfem stevie harrington, trasnmasc eddie munson, dad eddie munson, everyone's bi, fluff, flirting

Baby, You Can Drive My Car by @thisapplepielife | Rated T | cw: weed, language | tags: mechanic!eddie, business guy!steve, fluffy meet cute

Cats know best by @atimeofyourlife | Rated G | cw: mention of animal injury and amputation | tags: pre-steddie

hey sweetheart by @cranberrymoons | Rated E | no cw | tags: modern au, line cook eddie, waiter steve, hooking up

There can only be one Santa driving a DeLorean by @redlegumes | Rated T | no cw | tags: mechanic au, matching sweaters, bad flirting

Love Over Box Labels by @klausinamarink | Rated G | no cw | tags: modern au, no Upside Down, the romanticisms of working at warehouses

DAY 5 - FREE SPACE (DOMESTIC FLUFF)

never take it for granted, this domestic bliss by @lingeringmirth | Rated G | no cw | tags: domestic fluff, singing, baking

won't ever learn by steddieas-shegoes | Rated T | no cw | tags: tooth-rotting fluff, established relationship, steddie dads

The biggest, brightest, gaudiest display in all of Indiana by @just-my-latest-hyperfixation | Rated G | cw: one slight mention of PTSD | tags: Post-Vecna, everybody lives, pining, steve harrington has a crush on eddie munson, christmas

A Solid Plan by @thisapplepielife | Rated E | cw: sexual content | tags: established relationship, teamwork makes the dream work, if you build it: he will come, idiots in love, silly sex mishaps, first apartment, flat pack furniture

the scrooge who stole christmas by @cranberrymoons | Rated T | no cw

Breakfast in bed by @atimeofyourlife | Rated G | no cw | tags: established relationship, fluff

DAY 6 - COOKING TOGETHER

powdered sugar nose by steddieas-shegoes | Rated M | cw: food as a way to flirt, allusions to sex, fade to black sex | tags: established relationship, fluff, subtle praise kink

Art by @house-of-the-moving-image

Hungry for you by @just-my-latest-hyperfixation | Rated M | cw: sexually explicit language | tags: No UD AU, modern au, record shop owner!eddie, restaurant owner!steve, sexual tension, top steve, bottom eddie

Mixing it up (Moving us on) by @katyawriteswhump | Rated T | cw: alcohol and drug use, implied chronic pain/illness, angst | tags: fluff

Catch Fire by @thisapplepielife | Rated M | no cw | tags: established relationship, idiots in love, first home, cooking mishaps

Life lesson: Never share a kitchen. by @atimeofyourlife | Rated T | cw: angst, ambiguous ending

have a cup(cake) of cheer by @cranberrymoons | Rated T | no cw | tags: future fic, rockstar eddie, teacher steve, evil pta moms

Tradition by @maxinemaxmayfield | Rated T | no cw | tags: first kiss, post-s4, getting together, friends to lovers

and they dance by @lingeringmirth | Rated G | no cw | tags: domestic fluff, established steddie

Crepes and Cake Batter by @klausinamarink | Rated G | cw: post-domestic argument | tags: stress baking, hurt/comfort, sad steve

DAY 7 - HANUKKAH

the fifth night by steddieas-shegoes | Rated T | no cw | tags: non-practicing jewish eddie, getting together, first kiss, flirting

You Know Why by @thisapplepielife | Rated T | no cw | tags: canon divergence post-s4, eddie munson lives, gift giving, mutual attraction, flirting and wooing

Kindling the light by @atimeofyourlife | Rated T | no cw | tags: jewish steve harrington

[fragilecapric0rnn]

tagged by my lovely friends @gothbat99 & @fastcardotmp3 ❤️

rules: post five of your favorite fics that you've written and talk about why you love them. tag some mutuals so they can do the same and we can all spread some positivity about our writing ❤️

in order from most to least hehe

Anyway, It's About Old Friends My (unfinished) magnum opus. My heart and soul on full display. I love this fic with all my heart. I love this Steve and Eddie with all my heart. Writing an AU based on my favorite movie of all time but staying true to who these characters are has been so much fun and honeslty has taught me a lot about how I write long winded stories. Writing their struggles, especially writing Steve in this fic has been such a joy and a pleasure. It's on a brief pause as I wait for the WHMS bug to bite me again (its coming on fall and winter so its bound to bite me any day now). But I love this story and will always hold it close to my heart.

Catch Me (I'm Falling) This fic. Lol. This FIC. I know, I know, she was offline for a bit BUT she's back baby! In a different sense, this fic is also my heart and soul on full display. A lover of romantic comedy, wanting to write something that brings light and joy and laughter, much like the romcoms I love have brought me <3 Also, one of my favorite characterizations of Steve that I have ever written tbh! Bitchy Steve you will be my muse in any and everything that I wriiiiiiite!!!! Writing this fic also taught me that burnout is real and that I need to re-fucking-lax, no matter how much a story excites me lol.

Faces Freedom With A Little Fear JJ Harrington, our communal wife 💗 No but fr, Steve Harrington has always given me younger brother of an older sister vibes. Idk if its because I'm an older sister of a younger brother or what, but it works! I also loved creating an OC that was pretty three dimensional on her own, but also added so much to the characterization of Steve! It was also a bit healing to write this, as someone who is in a similar situation as JJ. Wanting to live my life away but having someone at home who you just can't help but worry about. I can only hope there's no monsters or alternate dimensions involved in my case. I do want to continue this verse, I want to write more of JJ, she is too special to be a one-time gal!

you can take the heart from your chest to use as a compass when you are lost Missed connections fic 💗 I have a lotta feelings about this one. I was still figuring out my voice, my first long fic. Re-reading this is like looking at pictures of you and your friends from middle school. It's cute and sweet but at times it makes ya full body cringe. I would love to rework this, rewrite certain scenes, add entire scenes. But, I also love the idea of my writing acting as a time capsule, a snapshot in time of what my writing looked like at a particular time. And at the heart of it, it's a story about subjects that are super close to my heart. Found family, holiday angst, steddie getting together, and Thanksgiving belonging to friends who feel like family <3<3

words caught in my throat (who talks first?) LOVED writing this one and also love rereading this one! A lot of the story is told from Steve's head as he navigates a very awkward and difficult situation of being locked in a house with his ex. Of which I was able to work on a lot of prose, and as someone who's strength is in dialogue writing, was a real treat! This fic also taught me that I am not just a one trick pony in that I can write difficult subjects and its not all just goofs and romcoms and meet-cutes. The stepping stones toward writign a fic like Old Friends. Snowed in fic!!! I love youuuuuuuu!

Tagging some fellow writers<3<3

@cheatghost @figthefruitfaeth @kkpwnall @hellsfireclub @gideoncharov @judasofsuburbia @thefreakandthehair @sharpbutsoft @legitcookie

[steddio]

steddie vegas au part 5

part 1; part 2; part 3; part 4; ao3

(throws angst at you and runs)

-

Eddie wakes languidly, comfortable and sated. Last night had been far more than he’d let himself dream of when he’d handed Steve those tickets. Performing for Steve had felt like performing for the first time again, every lyric more meaningful, every guitar chord more sensual. Steve was magnetic, beautiful, addicting. Not to mention incredibly hot in bed. This train of thought brings Eddie’s awareness to his morning wood, and he turns, reaching for Steve. Only to find the other side of the bed cold and empty. 

His stomach sinks with a jolt, and he sits up, looking around for Steve in the bathroom, listening for him anywhere else in the suite. It’s empty, and Steve’s clothes are gone from the floor. Eddie tries not to panic. Maybe Steve is a morning person, maybe he went for a run. But there’s no note anywhere, and when Eddie checks his phone there’s no text from Steve. 

He feels tears well and tries to force them away. This is fine. He’s woken up alone before. There could be a thousand explanations. It doesn’t mean that he wasn’t good enough, that Steve suddenly hates him, that he got what he wanted and left, that–. He interrupts his own catastrophizing, anchors himself in his breath (Sharon should be proud of him for using that CBT shit). He briefly debates letting himself wallow in bed but decides that will serve no one and goes to take a shower. As much as he doesn’t want to wash the traces of Steve off his body, he’s a little bit (ok a lot) gross from performing and sex. 

When he emerges from the bathroom, wrapped in a delightfully fluffy hotel robe, he can hear rustling in the living room. He dashes out of the bedroom with a breathless, “Ste-” before he stops in his tracks, realizing that it’s Chrissy instead. She’s in her same clothes from last night and she looks at him with concern and worse, pity. 

“Steve’s gone,” he tells her brusquely. She nods, like she already knows this, and touches his arm gently. 

“Eddie, honey, there’s something you need to see.”

He tries not to react as his body fills with dread. Chrissy holds her phone out to him and he takes it. It’s opened to a tabloid site, and Eddie wants to scoff, because there’s no way the tabloids could do anything worse than how they covered every step of his addiction, his recovery journey, his messy breakup, and his relapse. He’s basically immune to it by now, just the counterweight to fame. But as he skips past the headline and straight to the photo, his soul leaves his body. Because sure, that’s him, whatever. But in front of Eddie, with his back to the camera, is unmistakably Steve. Dorky dad with a great ass, concierge, regular person Steve. Who never asked for all the shit that Eddie’s lifestyle brings with it. 

“Jesus H Christ,” Eddie groans. “Did he see this?”

Chrissy just looks at him. Of course. Of course Steve had seen this. No wonder he’d run, why would he want this, no sex is good enough to be worth losing your privacy. 

“I was, um, with Robin last night,” Chrissy tells him. He tries to paste on a smile, to congratulate her, and then realizes she’s not bragging. 

“And?” Eddie prompts. “Chris, I can handle it. Just tell me.”

“Well,” Chrissy hedges. “Robin saw the photo and kind of freaked out. I tried to explain that this is normal, that the tabloids always do things like this, but she kept trying to call Steve. I think–” she trails off.

Eddie is on edge, but tries to keep breathing, to give her space. Finally, she continues, “I think Steve’s daughter saw the photo and recognized him. Robin wouldn’t say much, but she was freaking out about that specifically, said that Steve couldn’t afford another, um.”

“Another what?!” Eddie is full-on freaking out at this point. 

“Well, fuck-up. Is the word she used.”

Eddie finally gives in and lets the tears that have been building fall. Of course Steve would think of him as a fuck-up. A mistake. Steve was so good, so clean. And it was Eddie who had pushed and pushed, trying to get Steve to drop the professionalism, to let go, to play with him. Of course he had pushed too far. It’s what he does, he can’t leave things alone. 

Chrissy stands on the couch, wraps her arms around his neck, and tucks his head against her chest, making soothing noises. He can’t even muster the strength to hug her back, just stands there crying, probably ruining her shirt like he ruins everything. They stay like that for a long moment, Chrissy rocking him gently.

When the tears finally subside, Eddie feels raw and swollen, like an open wound. He wordlessly climbs back into bed and throws a pillow over his face, wanting to lose himself in the obliviousness of sleep. But of course, sleep doesn’t come easily. Instead he lies awake replaying every moment from the night before. The way Steve’s eyes had gone from huge in awe to half-lidded in bliss. The way the sweat on his neck had tasted. The hair on his belly, his large hands in Eddie’s hair, his toothy smile. By the time he finally drifts to sleep, he’s half-hard and more than half-hating himself. 

He wakes up to Chrissy sitting on the side of his bed, handing him a chilled bottle of water. He forces himself to sit upright and drinks it all down in one go. His stomach rumbles in response and he realizes he hasn’t eaten since dinner last night.

“What time is it?” he mumbles to Chrissy. 

“It’s nearly three,” she tells him. “I ordered you lunch, it should be here soon.” 

“Have I ever told you I love you,” he says solemnly. Her soft smile sends a pang through his heart. What would he do without her? He reaches for his phone, hardly letting himself hope, but there’s no text from Steve. 

“Do you think I should–” he starts to ask, then stops. Looks at Chrissy with pleading eyes. She shakes her head.

“I don’t know, hon. I texted Robin once I got back this morning, and she says that Steve might just need time.”

“Do you think he’s… okay?” Even hurting like he is, Eddie can’t help but worry. Chrissy is stopped from answering the question by a knock on the door. She goes to open it, then brings Eddie’s lunch to him so he can eat it in bed. 

“I’ll be right back,” she tells him. “Eat.”

So he does. He swears a burrito bowl has never tasted so good, and he demolishes it in seconds, delighted when he realizes that Chrissy had also ordered him a churro for dessert. He’s just licking the cinnamon sugar off his fingers when Chrissy returns. Her brow is furrowed and he’s about to ask her what’s wrong when she blurts out, “Steve’s fine.”

He’s about to ask her how she knows when she says in a rush, “He’s at the concierge desk. He’s fine.”

The food he’d just eaten turns to lead in Eddie’s stomach. Steve is… at work. He’s fine, and at work, and he hasn’t texted Eddie. Because Eddie was a fuck-up. He wants to cry again but he feels numb, empty.

–

The numbness follows him through the next week. Through three video calls with Sharon, where they talk through breathing exercises and affirmations and mindfulness techniques. He’s numb through Saturday’s performance, through the massage appointment Chrissy set up for him on Sunday morning, and through five AA meetings. 

He’s numb until he checks his phone on Tuesday night after their show and sees a text from Adrian, and is flooded with feeling, as if the dam holding back all the hurt and betrayal and anger and sadness finally broke. Adrian, his last boyfriend of nine months, who’d wanted so badly to be a fashion influencer, and who’d used Eddie as free exposure. Adrian, who three months ago, had gotten a contract with Dior and had promptly broken up with Eddie, telling him that Eddie was holding him back, that he wanted to follow his career, that he didn’t need Eddie anymore. Adrian, who had triggered Eddie’s relapse into drinking after eight years sober.

He almost deletes the text without opening it, but the masochist in him lets curiosity win.

Adrian: I see you’ve downgraded to someone who thinks light wash jeans are still cool. Pathetic. 

Eddie hurls his phone across his dressing room. He feels pathetic, because the first thought that comes to mind is about how good Steve’s ass looked in those jeans. The second is a wave of self-loathing because Steve is anything but a downgrade. Steve is too good for Eddie, better than he deserves, a shooting star in the night that he was lucky to have seen. 

It’s self-loathing that has Eddie jumping up, sliding into his shoes, and bending to scoop up his phone from the floor, relieved that it’s only cracked a little. He’s marinating in it as he leaves the room, steadfastly not thinking about when he had Steve pressed against the door, and he’s relishing in it when he starts making his way over to the lobby bar. 

–

Steve opens and then closes his draft resignation letter for the fifth time in the last hour. He’d written it in a drunken blur on his day off yesterday, punctuated by crying bouts and skinny girl margarita straight out of the bottle. He loves his job, but if he has to spend one more day standing at a desk across from the elevator where he ruined his life he’s going to lose it. 

He tries to mentally backtrack. It wasn’t the elevator incident that had ruined his life. Despite his initial panic about his family seeing the photo, they had been wholly accepting if not slightly amused that after so many years in Vegas, Steve had finally been caught in a mild celebrity scandal. No, the elevator incident had been a high point, an undeserved moment of bliss. What had ruined his life was Steve’s stupid fucking overreaction. 

After leaving Eddie’s hotel room last week, he’d managed to drive himself home while dissociating and immediately called Nancy to apologize. She hadn’t picked up, and the longer he waited for her to call him back, the more he became convinced that the event that had driven him to Vegas, that had lost him his chance at a nuclear family, was happening all over again. 

By the time his phone finally rang, Steve was curled in the fetal position on the floor. It had taken Nancy an hour to convince him he had nothing to apologize for and to coax him into bed, and she must have texted Robin, because he woke up in the early afternoon to Robin in bed next to him, stroking his hair. They’d facetimed Max, who, in her classic teenage way, had spent only a minute teasing Steve for the photo before rattling on about high school drama, reminding Steve that sometimes what feels like the end of the world is actually a minor, solvable issue. 

He’d gone into work that evening determined to make things right with Eddie, but when Eddie finally came down to the lobby, he didn’t even look in Steve’s direction. When it happened again the next day, and then the next, Steve had resigned himself to the fact that Eddie wanted nothing to do with him. Maybe he’d even been glad that Steve had left in the morning, that he’d saved Eddie the trouble of asking Steve to leave. Who wouldn’t be embarrassed about their dirty little hotel secret getting out to the public?

He opens his resignation letter again. Changes the signature from Regretfully to Sincerely and then back again. He’s about to send it to the printer when the desk phone rings.

“Caesars Palace concierge, this is Steve, how can I help you?”

On the other end of the line, there’s a slight gasp and then silence. Steve waits a polite amount of time before repeating himself. When there’s still no answer, he breaks form and whispers, “Hello? Is anyone there?”

The only response is a hitch of breath. Maybe he’s delusionally hopeful, but Steve takes a chance. “Eddie?”

He hears a broken whisper in response. “Hi sugar.” 

“Eddie, hi, sweetheart, are you okay? I’m so sorry I left, I freaked out, and then I wanted to talk to you, but I couldn’t get your attention, and–”

Eddie cuts him off with a pained “Stevie” that has every one of Steve’s parental instincts on edge. 

“Eddie, what’s wrong?”

He hears Eddie take a deep breath. “I’m at the bar.” 

Steve’s stomach drops. “Oh. Okay. Did you– Did you order a drink?”

There’s a long silence. Then, “I did. But. I didn’t drink it. I think–” Eddie stops. Steve wants to scream into the phone, to run to the bar and grab the glass, throw it on the floor. But he forces himself to wait, to let Eddie take the lead. 

“I think I need to go to a meeting,” Eddie finally mumbles, and Steve is launching into action, pulling up the AA meeting list, the document that had started it all.  

“Okay, absolutely, I got you.” He scrolls frantically to the meetings on Tuesday and miraculously finds one starting soon. “Okay, Eddie, there’s a meeting in half an hour. We’re going to get you there.” When there’s nothing but silence and background chatter on the other end, Steve asks, “Are you there, sweetheart?”

“I’m here,” Eddie says weakly.

“Okay, Eds, do you want me to walk you to the meeting? We can go together.”

“No! No, I can’t–” Eddie hesitates. Steve wants to smack himself in the face. Why would Eddie want to be seen with him? After all the embarrassment he’d caused already.

“Okay, that’s fine, no problem. I’m going to give you directions over the phone, is that okay?” Steve barely catches a quiet “yes” in response. 

“Alright, Eddie, I need you to stand up. I need you to walk away from the bar. Can you do that for me?” Steve hears rustling on the other end, and then Eddie’s voice comes through clearly. “I’m walking out.”

“Great, sweetheart, that’s great. You’re doing so well, that was the hardest part.” Out of the corner of his eye, Steve sees a black-clad, curly-haired figure enter the lobby. He watches as Eddie makes his way slowly toward the front door of the hotel, looking determined, eyes never straying from his goal. His heart clenches in his chest like it does every time he’s seen Eddie from afar over the past few days, and it takes all his willpower to not run over to him.

“Okay keep going, Eddie, you’re going to go out the front door and turn left, and then walk two blocks.” Steve watches as Eddie follows his directions, listens to his quiet breathing over the phone.

“I’m outside,” Eddie tells him.

“How is it out there?” Steve asks to keep him talking. “Is it still hot as hell like earlier?”

Eddie tells him about the weather, about the slight breeze that’s picked up between the buildings now that the sun has gone down. For a moment his voice is drowned out by a siren, but when the noise fades Steve can hear his steady breathing and footsteps.

“Tell me where you are, Eds,” Steve probes gently. When Eddie tells him the cross street, Steve asks him about his surroundings, makes Eddie describe what he’s seeing to keep him grounded. 

“Almost there, I need you to cross to the opposite corner and then turn right.” Steve can practically feel Eddie rocking nervously as he waits for each light, but he dutifully follows Steve’s directions, tells him about the older couple dressed like they’d walked out of the 1960s, about the mom pushing her crying baby in a stroller, about the glimpse of the moon he can see as he looks down a side street. 

“You’re doing great, now we’re just looking for the rec center. It should be three blocks down on the left.” Eddie goes radio silent for a few minutes and Steve tries not to panic, listening to Eddie’s breathing to reassure himself.

Eventually he hears a quiet, “Steve? Are you there?” Steve tries to keep his relief out of his voice when he answers, “Yes, Eddie, I’m here. I’ll be here as long as you need me.” And he’s struck by how true that is, how he wants to be the person Eddie calls when he doesn’t want to be alone. 

On the line, Steve hears a squeaky door open and then echoing footsteps. “I’m at the rec center,” Eddie says. “I see signs for the meeting, I’m going to follow them.”

“That’s, that’s good, sweetheart.” A moment later, Steve hears someone greet Eddie and usher him inside. He’s about to hang up, thinking Eddie no longer needs him, when he hears a sharp inhale. 

“Sugar?” Eddie whispers into the phone. Before Steve can answer, he continues: “Thank you. Thank you so much.” And then hangs up. 

Steve takes a moment to just stand there, still clutching the phone and holding back tears. Eventually he comes back into himself. Takes a deep breath. And drags his resignation letter into the trash.

--

continue to part 6.

read on ao3.

--

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[rebel-walnut]

Let's Do The Time Warp Again

Steddie Season 3 time travel fic, long awaited part 9, enjoy like 10k words as an apology :)

Ao3, Pt. 1, Pt.2, Pt.3, Pt.4, Pt.5, Pt.6, Pt.7, Pt.8

Robin greets them at the door as she flings it open and Steve can only imagine the sight; a few disheveled preteens holding up a very passed out El, and two of the worst interdimensional babysitters known to man that probably still have blue gunk and trauma in their hair. 

Her mouth is still slightly agape as she motions them in, but Steve can tell it's a respectable amount of agape-ness and that she's doing everything in her power to hold back approximately a million questions. She lays a hand on Steve's shoulder as he walks in.

"You're okay?" It's half a question and half willing it into existence, but Steve does his best to give her a reassuring smile and pulls her hand into his own, giving it a quick squeeze.

"Everyone's good," He says and squeezes her hand again before letting go. The door clicks shut behind them as Max and Dustin shuffle El to the couch and flop her down, Max paying absolutely no attention to Robin and opting instead to sit on the armrest of the couch by El's head. Dustin sits at the foot of the couch between El's scrunched up legs and the other armrest and matches Max's trained gaze on El. Dustin, having always been more socially inclined than Max, shifts on the couch to face Robin and flits his gaze between Robin and El, then Robin and Steve, and Steve can see him mentally order his questions from most to least important.

"What is-" Dustin starts but is immediately cut off by Robin.

"Not now, squirt. Me first. What the hell is going on Harrington?" Her pitch crescendos near the end of the sentence and her eyes are wide like a startled doe as she stares into Steve's soul, back to her usual level of intensity. Steve sighs and lets his head fall forward, hands going to his hips out of habit. Dustin scoffs.

"Me and Eddie had another episode. El fixed it but it was connected to the pool somehow, the gate got activated or something. Whether by me and Eddie just being out there, or…" He shrugs a bit and leaves off the end about Barb, but sees Eddie catch his gaze from where he's still situated by the door. Robin nods and scans over the kids by the couch then over to Steve and Eddie, her hands wringing over themselves. She pats the back of the couch and Max and Dustin turn to look at her.

"You gremlins doing okay?" Her tone is somehow gentle and frantic. Max snorts a little.

"No thanks to Munson's flamethrowing skills."

"Hey! I'll have you know that lighter is finicky."

"Not for me it wasn't. You'd think someone who dresses like they'd outsmoke my own mother would know how to handle a lighter."

"I had been recently possessed, what more do you want from me?"

"Possession is a bit over dramatic. Call me when you start levitating."

Eddie chokes on whatever comment he was about to throw at her next and Steve sees the blood drain from his face in real time. Max either doesn't notice it or doesn't care, just turns back to Dustin and El and accepts her win. Eddie stares at her long after Max turns her head with a dropped sort of stare, and Steve imagines he's making a similar face. Eddie's still positioned awkwardly just inside the door frame and has been making limited eye contact with Steve since they left his house, but Eddie's stare snaps to Steve mimicking the same guilty recognition sitting deep in Steve's throat. 

Steve's entire body flushes in a wave of anxious heat and tension as if at any moment someone's bones will start snapping and never stop. He's not entirely sure his body's over reacting. The rush hits his head in a wave of vertigo when Eddie looks away, and his vision tips sideways for a moment though he's sure his feet haven't left the ground. 

His mind has been on a constant loop since earlier with El in his living room, and everytime he looks at Eddie he feels his footing stumble a little more. Steve's feeling his time slip away every time Eddie blinks, feels the blood pour from Eddie's wounds still hot and slick on Steve's hands and Steve can't stop reaching for his pulse from across the room. He doesn't know how to save someone from a death they've already died. His only option is to make sure it never happened in the first place, but every time he tries to get to even the first step of a plan he sees the look on Eddie's face when El tells him he died. 

He sees the black pooling out of his mouth in the tub. He sees the blood spilling over his shirt. He sees Eddie's foreign smile saying he's resigned to it. He sees Eddie trying to slam his stupid expensive doors, and Steve wishing Eddie would just throw a punch and shatter the glass anyways, because if Eddie's still here and he's still making noise then he can't have died. He sees Eddie next to him by the pool, tears in both their eyes, and Steve wondering how the man in front of him could possibly be dead if his cigarette was still burning and his skin was still warm under Steve's palm and their tears tasted like the same salt water. He sees Eddie's lips and his burning eyes and something like fire, something like life between them, and he wonders how Eddie could already be dead. He sees Eddie standing closed off around the corner in Steve's kitchen where Steve's words get caught halfway up his throat because he didn't know how to speak without every second word being a beg for reassurance. He sees Eddie in Robin's doorway, haunted by a girl who doesn't remember him and maybe never will.

Steve swallows down the vertigo and clamps his hands to his side to steady himself. He pulls his gaze from Eddie and looks to Robin instead who's looking at him like she's seeing through every one of his layers. She tilts her head as another wave of dizziness rocks through Steve and he careens forward a bit, Robin making quick work of getting over to him to steady Steve by his shoulders. He swallows down the vertigo again, this time with more success, and Robin rubs a trail up his arms and back down like she's trying to warm him up.

"Let me know if this is making it worse. My mom used to do this for me when I got anxious as a kid, but sometimes it just made me warm instead of grounding me, which was nice on occasion but usually just made me feel like I needed to throw up," She rubs a little lighter and barely breaks for a breath, "So I guess let me know if you think you're gonna yarf, this is a new sweater and I don't know how to get time vomit out of wool," Robin keeps trailing up and down his arms, and Steve's not sure if Robin petting him like he's an overexcited dog is helping, but it's not not helping so he doesn't tell her to stop. 

"I promise I'm not gonna vomit on your sweater, Robin. I've ruined more sweaters with blood than vomit anyways in the recent past, so you've got nothing to worry about," He tries to say it as a joke but his voice comes out weaker than he expects, so it lands more as a pitiful statement than something funny if Robin's polite grimace is anything to go by. 

Steve gently nudges at her hands after a moment once he feels mostly steady again and gives her a nod when she's hesitant to pull away. Robin gives Steve another once over then does the same to Eddie who's looking generally miserable and pale while he's crumpled against the door frame, then over to the toddlers with loud opinions on the couch that are still watching over the passed out superhero.

"You guys need to get back, like, now, huh," Robin says, and it's not really a question. Steve nods anyways. The motion sends a twinge up the back of his neck and shoots through his temples causing him to jolt. His vision crackles as he blinks, and Steve hopes for the first time in his life for a migraine and not for this to be another episode brought on by supernatural sludge.

"I'm just gonna," Steve shoots a thumb over his shoulder in the vague direction of the bathroom and Robin doesn't question how he knows where it is as he walks off. 

The bathroom is the same as it is in '86 except for the different brand of soap sitting on the counter. The walls are painted a blush pink just bright enough to be out of the norm and if you look close enough you can see each brush stroke. The first time Steve commented on it, Robin had told him about her mom's eclectic tastes and how she had painted the whole bathroom on a whim with leftover paint she'd bought for a project she'd never started and a singular brush she found in the depths of their garage. As comforting as the memory is, the colour is currently cutting into Steve's retinas and doing nothing to ease the pain creeping through his skull.

He opts instead to twist the faucet as cold as it will go and dunk the back of his head directly under the stream, craning his head just enough to not brain himself on the tap or send another twinge up to his head. The effect is immediate on the pain, the water seeping into Steve's hair and dragging it to curl around his jaw. The sharp cold is the only welcome sharpness he's felt since this all began, the water dissolving the twinges and cramps that spread along his skull. He lets himself breathe into the relief and relish in it.

Steve pulls his head from the sink once the throbbing headache soothes to a dull and grabs a hand towel with delicate embroidered daisies off the rack of mismatched and brightly colored towels. He's scrubbing it through his hair when he hears two gentle taps against the door.

"I'm okay Robs, just needed a breather," Steve calls through the door and finishes scrubbing the towel across his neck. He drags it up towards his bangs and the latch clicks open to his right.

"Hate to admit it, but I'm not Buckley," Eddie's voice is quiet and low as he slides around the door and shuts it behind him. The bathroom's small and not quite meant for two people, but there's still enough breathing room between them with Eddie leaning against the door and Steve leaning against the far side of the counter as he folds his towel back up. 

Steve steps away from the edge and Eddie tracks the movement, his eyes moving from where Steve left his towel on the counter, up to the soaked neck of his shirt and the drips on his chest, the tangling damp curls falling from behind his ears, the curl falling over his left eye, and then finally resting at his eyes. Steve feels like he's on display with the way Eddie scans him, feels like Eddie's seeing something he shouldn't with the way he's staring into Steve's eyes. Out of nervous habit Steve's tongue darts out to wet his lips. Eddie follows the movement down, barely makes it back up.

The whole ordeal makes Steve shiver. He blames it on the cold water. Steve lets his own gaze dip and notice the way the center of Eddie's lips are always a little chapped, lets himself wonder how rough they would feel. 

And. Look. It's not like he's never thought about it. He's not blind either. Maybe he didn't notice, or rather, didn't bother noticing the way Eddie looked at him before, but he had bigger issues than whether or not the guy he's trapped in time with was staring at him in a flirty or friendly way. But he's noticing now. And Steve's reputation wasn't for nothing- he knows when he's being flirted with. And maybe he's reading this wrong, maybe whatever almost happened by the pool will never be more than almost. A lapse in judgment during a time of grief. But he looks at Eddie, and he's back to looking at Steve's lips with a half lidded gaze. 

Eddie's still looking at him, and Steve feels pinned in place by his stare, and he's struck with how much he wants. He's let himself want before; let himself want Nancy and her bravery and her hard edges, let himself want random girls like Linda or Jess or Stacy just for a night or a week or a month, let himself want the warmth between their thighs and their cherry stained smiles.

This though. Wanting this is different. Steve knows that wanting this- wanting Eddie- and having it crosses some sort of line or boundary that he can't come back from. Maybe it's just end of the world insanity (if they make it out of here he'll have to apologize to Nance for his speech in the Winnebago) (and again for his speech in the woods) and Steve's doomed to forever latch on to the person in the closest proximity to him every time there's a world ending threat, just a cycle of speeches and stolen kisses and almost dying. It's all too complicated when everything is interlaced with the threat of death around every corner, every chance being your last. It's different when what you want might only be linked to the fact that you can't have it. That there's a time limit. That there's a very real possibility that the person you want is already dead, that even though you refuse to accept it, it still hangs over both of you like a promise.

Maybe it's just that. But a larger part of himself knows that it isn't. Knows that the way he looks at Eddie, or really the way he looked at the guys on the team in highschool, or the men on the covers of the magazines by the checkout at Family Video, or Han Solo during the Star Wars marathons with Dustin he pretended to hate, it's all more than just a coincidence during near death experiences. More than wanting someone to live. Steve's pretty sure he can tell the difference between wanting Eddie to live, period, and wanting Eddie beyond just having him alive. He thinks he recognizes the pure want. Knows it's not a regular sort of urge that everybody has. And whether that makes him gay, or still straight with a little bit of something else going on, or a different thing entirely, Steve's not very sure. He doesn't think it really matters if he's being honest, labels seem like the least of his concern for the near future. What does matter is that Eddie is still staring at Steve's lips, and he's worrying that chapped center point on his bottom lip between his teeth. Steve can't stop staring at it, and maybe the grief and the mangled future between them and 1986 is acting as some sort of catalyst to speed up the process of Steve choosing to do something about it, but for a split second his brain isn't caught on the timing and the uncertainty and the future of it all. For a split second, he feels utterly sure.

It feels like he's crossed that line- boundary, whatever. Eddie feels like something he's not going to be able to come back from. And maybe Steve should be freaking out about this revelation more or maybe he should have already had this revelation years ago in packed locker rooms, but now feels like as good a time as any to make the active choice to step over the line. He wants Eddie. He's going to let himself want Eddie. Everything else can come after. Everything else can be fixed after. For now, all he has to do is focus on this one thing. 

Eddie's tapping his fingernails against the laminate counter and his eyes (half-lidded and still lost in thought) are flitting between Steve's lips and the floor, his own lip still caught between his teeth. His lip is almost white in the center where Eddie's biting it and Steve's sure he must be drawing blood. 

"You're gonna bleed," Steve says, dumbly, because half the things he says are well thought out or at least slightly thought out, and the other half are things like saying 'you're gonna bleed' without context to a man in imminent mortal danger, in a way that doesn't discern whether it's a threat or just strange commentary.

Eddie pops his gaze back to Steve in a surprised frown as if he somehow forgot Steve was both sentient and already staring at Eddie. His fingers stall on the countertop and he releases his lip, the colour springing back to the center.

"I'm huh?" Eddie says and quirks a confused brow at Steve. Steve gestures half heartedly to his mouth.

"Your lip," Steve taps a finger against his own lip in emphasis and tries not to blush when Eddie's eyes follow his finger.

"Oh," Eddie breathes and his eyes languidly meet Steve's again for a second before Eddie tears his gaze away to the floor and shuffles back despite his back already being to the door. He clears his throat.

"So, uh, you're okay? Not like, passing out again or anything?" Eddie still isn't meeting Steve's eyes, and Steve tries not to let it twinge in his chest. Steve pushes back to the corner of the counter and folds his arms across his chest, letting his own eyes drift to the floor. He swallows down the want, clamps down on disappointment.

"I'm fine, just thought I was getting a migraine. Plus, you know," Eddie's eyes shoot up and back down immediately as he nervously gives a few quick nods.

"Yeah, 's hard with Red," Eddie's voice is thin and trails off near the end, and all Steve can hear between their silence is the static in his ears. Eddie taps his fingers in a quickening rhythm against the counter a few more times before giving an awkward cough and pushing off from the door. "Well, if you're okay then I'll just…" He gestures over his shoulder and leaves his eyes trained on the floor, refusing to acknowledge Steve and turning to face the other way. Steve wills back the sting of shame prickling at the surface of his face.

"You know you can just talk about it, right?" Steve asks, looking at his shoes. Eddie sighs and lets go of the door knob.

"Talk about what, Steve," Eddie says with a mixture of exasperation and nerves in his voice. "There's nothing to talk about. Nothing happened."

"I thought something did," Steve says and Eddie raises an eyebrow, the rest of his face evenly blank. "Almost," Steve adds, feeling suddenly dumb for bringing it up. 

Eddie stays silent, just watching Steve from the other side of the too-pink bathroom, expression daringly neutral. 

"We don't need to talk about it." Eddie says. Steve tries to swallow.

"I know we don't need to, but you've hardly looked at me and-"

"Fucking H. Christ, Harrington! We don't need to do this!" Eddie's voice echoes raw around the room and settles deep in Steve's chest. Eddie tears a hand through his curls and yanks it on the ends as it tangles, ripping it through again and then opting instead to press his fingers into his brow. His eyes are clenched shut and his voice is all shaky grit.

"I don't need you to do this, okay? We can go back to being strictly time traveling buddies in which only one of us makes it out of this alive, and I can go back to making cynical yet comedic remarks, and you can go back to being the golden hero, and we never have to talk about any of this ever again," Eddie's voice crackles between them and Steve holds back a wave of icy hot self-pity. He's caught in the seemingly never-ending cycle of being so viciously sure, followed by being so viciously wrong. It's an embarrassment and an anger that burns deep in his stomach. He's sure his face is flushed from both.

"Well if you feel so fucking strongly about it," Steve's spitting the words, drawing on old habits, "then leave already, I don't need you here just to kick at me," Steve's not sure if it comes out angry or hushed, but Eddie rolls his eyes anyways. 

"If I feel strongly about it? You're the one who couldn't spit out enough words in the kitchen to just let me off the goddamn hook," Eddie scoffs and the cruelty hits Steve like a slap in the face, "And you're the one who wanted me to talk about it even though I'm the one who's made it pretty fucking clear where I stand," Eddie's cheeks are flushed and his hand is gripping at the edge of the counter, his knuckles going white.

"Okay I fucking get it, alright? Fuck, just-" Steve chokes on the mix of Eddie's bitterness and his own prickling dread. "Just maybe don't go for the kill the next time someone tries to tell you how they feel." Eddie laughs, hollow and dry.

"I'll keep that in mind for when a guy makes me give me my own rejection speech again," Eddie's shaking his head at the ground, one hand still gripped on the counter.

"Rejection- Eddie, how is that at all-" Eddie's eyes snap up and his neutrality and cruelty break.

"Don't do this to me, Steve," His voice is the softest it's been the whole conversation, and the sudden change melts away any words Steve had planned to say. "Please just pretend I never would have taken it past 'almost,'" Steve gets caught on the word 'pretend.' He rolls it around in his head and replays the hushed way Eddie said it. It doesn't fit. Eddie wouldn't have taken it past almost. He just berated Steve for thinking he would. 

"Eddie, I'm sorry," Eddie's sigh is as broken as his stare and Steve can't shake the feeling that they're both missing something. "I didn't plan for any of that to happen, the 'almost' or anything after," Eddie tucks his arms across his stomach and Steve can't help but mirror it. "I just know I wanted to," It comes out barely above a whisper, but Eddie's eyes shine a little wider anyways.

"Steve, you can't do this to me," Eddie's folded in on himself in the corner and it makes him seem smaller, like he's carrying less of his soul. There's heat prickling in Steve's eyes.

"I'm sorry," Steve chokes again, "I didn't mean to end up liking you, or, wanting- whatever. It's all bullshit anyways, right?" He gives Eddie a smile that was supposed to come off less broken and small than it felt, but Steve's not sure it worked out that way. He laughs anyways, quietly and morosely as he mentally checks off his list of unfortunate romantic patterns. Bullshit, check. Bathrooms, check. Armageddon confessions going wrong, check. Eddie staring at him wide eyed, his mouth falling open just a little? Well, new, actually. 

"Steve- you don't-" Eddie gestures a little in front of him. "Are we being idiots or are you fucking with me?" His voice is still soft, but this time more disbelieving than broken. "Cause I can't do this if you're just fucking with me, I'm not letting shit like that happen to me again." Steve doesn't even know what he's saying.

"I'm not," Steve says, unsure of anything else to say when he's not even fully sure what Eddie's getting at. Eddie laughs in a short way that's more air than voice, and scrubs both his hands down his face. 

"I wanted to kiss you. Outside," Eddie says and it strikes Steve between the ribs. "In case that wasn't clear."

Steve breathes. At least he's pretty sure he does. He breathes, and he mentally rips this whole conversation from his head for examination later, and simply accepts that he has no idea what just happened. He breathes, and he lets Eddie's words settle between them. He lets the conversation sit, and picks up only Eddie's last two sentences. 

"It wasn't clear," Steve says, and pushes out of his corner. "Or I'm an idiot," Eddie watches Steve's hand fall from the counter and trails his gaze up to Steve's eyes. Eddie unwraps his arms from around his middle and sways into Steve's space with the movement, the two less than a breath away from each other.

"They don't have to be mutually exclusive," The corner of Eddie's mouth tugs up into a quiet smile, and Steve wants to know what it tastes like. It should maybe be a more startling thought than it is given how fast he ran through this realization, but looking back it doesn't feel like the first time Steve's thought about it. He leans half a step forward, just far enough that they're not touching yet, but close enough that if they both inhaled at the right time, they would be. Steve raises a hand and hovers it just to the side of Eddie's curls, Eddie just staring in response, then tilting his head towards Steve's hand so subtly Steve would have missed it if all his senses weren't already tuning out anything that isn't Eddie. 

Steve gently pushes his fingers between Eddie's curls and wraps one around his forefinger, Eddie fluttering his eyes shut with a sigh and a scrunch of his brow. His face crumples into hard ridges at the end, and he wraps a hand around Steve's own.

"You have to mean this," Eddie breathes between them, his eyes pulling open to fix Steve with a deep stare. Steve tightens his fingers in the roots of Eddie's hair, Eddie consequently tightening his grip around Steve's hand. He tugs a little, just as a test, just to see if Eddie will follow the pull forward. 

He does.

Steve melts at the feeling of Eddie's breath on his skin, dusting across the tip of his nose and tickling his lips. It's as enticing as it was the first time. He guides Eddie forward again with another small pull, Eddie's eyes falling nearly closed and his breath hitching just behind his teeth. Steve tilts his head just enough to bump Eddie's nose a little with his own, a repetition of how he'd pulled Eddie in by the pool. Steve noses at the crease where Eddie's smile would sit in his cheek, relishing in the chilled scent of his skin and the way his breath jolts just a little under Steve's gentle touch. He dares to brush the edges of their lips together, barely touching. He brings them back to the brink of almost. 

Eddie's lips form the shape of a word, no breath leaving to say it, but Steve recognizes the way his name looks in Eddie's mouth anyways. He hears it for what it is; a last chance to bail. To leave them at almost, leave them perpetually on the cusp of something. Steve tightens his grip and shuts his eyes, tugs Eddie right into him instead.

He swallows Eddie's gasp at the contact and lives in the sweetness of finally tasting his breath, finally feeling the warm press of Eddie's lips against his own. Eddie slides his hand from where it's covering Steve's to down his arm, then up his shoulder and neck to cup his cheek. They press closer to each other, hands light and cautious as Steve pulls on Eddie's bottom lip, Eddie's head falling forward with the motion. Eddie's other hand finds Steve's face so that he's cradled between Eddie's touch, Steve keeping one hand tangled farther in the back of Eddie's hair and sliding the other up from by the counter to pull him in by the waist. 

It's gentler than Steve thought it would be, is the first thing he realizes. For all of Eddie's dramatics and hard exteriors, he's kissing Steve like he's made of spun glass; like any harsh movement would be enough to make him crack or shatter. Eddie kisses along the seam of Steve's mouth, drawing a line from one edge of his smile to the other in languidly soft presses and pulls, as if trying to commit it to memory by touch alone. Steve scratches at Eddie's scalp and simultaneously pulls at his hips, the movement drawing a hum from Eddie's throat that reverberates into Steve's lips. He tugs on Eddie's lip just enough to get another hum, still letting everything sit in the gentle slowness they're shrouded in. 

Their lips slide together and Steve feels the flutter of Eddie's eyelashes brushing at his cheek, tickling his skin in the best sort of way. Eddie kisses his way to the edge of Steve's mouth again, Steve getting lost in the gentle slide and pull and the way every nerve in his body can only feel Eddie. Eddie hums and huffs a small breath through his nose, and the sound only makes Steve tug Eddie impossibly closer.

The pressure on his lips dissipates as Eddie pulls away with a small popping sound, Steve's eyes flitting open to take in the way Eddie's eyes are gleaming against his flushed cheeks. He's panting a little despite how gentle the kiss was, and his lips are spit-slicked and reddened. The sight sends a rush through Steve's spine, and the recognition that he did that flushes his cheeks with heat. Eddie's still holding him close, their faces only an inch apart but Eddie's eyes darting across every section. His eyes are blown wide and glassy with his eyebrows scrunched down a little, and Steve realizes Eddie's waiting for him to react. 

"I meant it," Steve is quick to say, staring Eddie down and injecting as much sincerity into the words as he can. Eddie blinks, but his expression doesn't change. "I do. I mean it," Steve says again, and grips at Eddie's hair in emphasis, his other hand digging into Eddie's hip. Eddie mirrors the change in pressure and digs his thumbs slightly into the jut of Steve's cheekbones. Eddie's eyebrows drop and his gaze is lidded, an easy smirk that's somehow both sharp and gentle pulling at his shining mouth. The expression is so fervently Eddie that the weight of it settles through Steve. Eddie leans in and nudges at Steve's nose.

"You fucking better," Eddie growls the words against Steve's lips and crashes their faces together, this time diving in teeth first. Ah, there you are, Steve thinks, and nips at Eddie's lips. This time Steve feels the roughness he was expecting from Eddie's chapped lips, gets all the grit and enthusiasm and teeth he was expecting from kissing Eddie Munson.

It's all eagerness and hunger as Eddie hooks a hand farther around Steve's jaw and slides his fingers behind Steve's ear, pulling them closer until it feels like every part of their faces are touching. Eddie's grip is harsh yet soft, his fingers circling and pressing into the side of Steve's head everytime Eddie moves his jaw. He bites down hard on Steve's lip and sends a jolt through his spine, Steve abandoning his vice grip around Eddie's waist to dig both hands into his curls. Eddie gasps against Steve's tongue as he gives him a sharp tug at the roots of his hair and curls his fingers in deeper. 

Eddie's jaw juts forward and Steve feels Eddie's tongue flick against his lips, poking and exploring against the seam. Steve wastes no time tilting his head and guiding Eddie into a hungry opened mouthed kiss. They're holding each other around their heads, hands bracketing their faces and fingers tangled in hair and pressing into cheeks. It's the most urgent a kiss has ever felt to Steve, with the way they're pulling and pushing against each other and every press of lips feels like both a warning and a promise. Eddie's licking into his mouth and dragging his jaw across Steve's like it's the only thing keeping him alive, and Steve can't help but do the same. It's the end of the world. 

It's the end of the world, and Eddie's thumbs are pressing into Steve's cheeks like Steve will disappear without a tight grip, and he's kissing him like it's his only chance to memorize the way Steve's mouth can be traced with the tip of his tongue. Every inch of Eddie that could possibly be touching Steve is touching Steve, and Steve's leaning and pulling and grabbing in response, just trying to keep Eddie alive under the warmth of his palms and the slide of his lips. 

He's trying to think of whether this would've happened if they weren't stuck in time together, or how long it would have taken for him to realize he even wanted this to happen, but then Eddie sucks at his tongue and all of Steve's thoughts are wiped from his brain and replaced by a groan in the back of his throat. He surges forward against Eddie's lips and it's a hiss of hunger and teeth, Eddie's head (and Steve's knuckles) knocking against the door with the motion. The noise reverberates through Steve's jaw and he gives Eddie's hair another tug before dropping his hands back to Eddie's waist and pulling him away from the door. He turns Eddie's hips and spins him so Eddie's back is to the counter, refusing to break the kiss in the process. 

Steve surges into him again, and one of Eddie's hands falls from Steve's face to catch his balance against the counter. Steve goes with the momentum and leans Eddie farther against the ledge, sliding his hands down from Eddie's hips to just under his thighs. The kiss breaks with a wet pop as Steve hooks his hands tight under Eddie's legs and hoists him up to sit on the counter. 

"Jesus fuck-" Eddie curses and wobbles as Steve sets him down, Eddie now just above Steve's eye level. The space between the sink and wall isn't much, but it's enough that only part of Eddie's leg is covering the sink. Eddie's eyes are blown wide when Steve looks back up, their lips only an inch apart. He slides his hands up the sides of Eddie's legs, stopping to pinch at the side of his hip.

"Okay?" Steve asks, and Eddie gives the sides of Steve's neck a short squeeze.

"God, yeah," He breathes, and dives back down to Steve's mouth. Steve makes it messy and open immediately this time, reveling in the warmth when Eddie's tongue swipes across his bottom lip, followed by the immediate chill from the air. Steve skates his fingers under the hem of Eddie's (Steve's) shirt, feels the way his muscles twitch under Steve's touch. 

He slides a hand around to Eddie's back and drags a hand up his spine, Eddie dragging his teeth across Steve's lip in turn and arching his back forward ever so slightly. He groans into Steve's mouth when Steve drags his nails back down the notches in his spine, his other hand tracing circles across Eddie's front from under the heavy Van Halen print. He feels nothing but smooth skin and light dustings of hair under his fingertips, no marred scarring or puckered wounds.

The thought makes him press in harder just to be sure, tongue slipping deeper between Eddie's lips and fingers grabbing hard against his skin. Eddie gasps against his lips and Steve feels him bring his legs up to wrap around Steve's waist. Eddie drops his hand from Steve's jaw to wrap an arm around his neck, the other lifting from the counter to do the same. Eddie's pulling Steve in and wrapping him tight, every limb pressed against Steve's and holding him close. Eddie's arms slide between wrapping around the back of Steve's neck to scratching at his scalp to holding his jaw as he kisses him, and Steve can't get enough of any of it.

He drinks Eddie in, lives in the sensation of his lips pulling at Steve's and his heels digging into Steve's back and his hair falling against Steve's cheeks, pulls and grips and tugs for more. He wraps his arms around Eddie from under his shirt and pulls, just enough to tug Eddie to the edge of the counter and press their chests hard together. Eddie gives a surprised little yelp into Steve's mouth and drops a leg to the floor, the other staying glued to Steve's back. Every pull and kiss and slide feels like reassurance from each other that they're alive, that the person in their arms is actually here. Eddie thumbs around the circumference of Steve's neck and Steve knows it's the same sort of compulsion that keeps Steve's fingers glued to Eddie's side. It's hunger and want and lust, but it's also reassurance and safety. It's holding onto reality. It's holding onto life.

They're pressing fingers into skin, and tongues into lips and teeth, both learning the way to draw gasps and twitches from the other. They map out what they can reach of each other, grabbing at phantom injuries and kissing lips that stayed the same. Eddie bites at Steve's bottom lip and pulls, pulls with it a noise Steve didn't know he could make. Eddie lets it go and Steve takes in a sharp inhale, looking up to see Eddie giving him a little eyebrow wiggle and a smirk. It would be enough to make him laugh, but it gets caught halfway up his throat as Eddie leans in and ghosts a kiss off the corner of his mouth, then trails along his jaw leaving quick peppered licks and bites before attaching himself to the junction of Steve's neck and shoulder just above his collarbone.

Eddie yanks down the collar of Steve's shirt with one hand and cradles the back of his head with the other, tangling a hand in his hair and tugging just as Steve had earlier. The combination of Eddie pulling at his hair mixed with whatever vampire-esque mark he's leaving on Steve's neck makes Steve's vision white out. Eddie bites over the notch in his collarbone and Steve feels the muscles in his legs give out as he lets his forehead drop to Eddie's shoulder with a shudder. 

Eddie soothes the bite with a swipe of his tongue and pulls off, tilting Steve's head back and off his shoulder to look in his eyes. Eddie's cheeks are flushed and his lips are this plump sort of shiny red that has Steve swooning all over again, his eyes somehow deeper and darker than they were before. Eddie flits between Steve's eyes and his lips for a breath, before he leans in for another kiss.

This one is shorter and gentler, closer to their first kiss than whatever just happened between them. Steve can feel Eddie's smile against his lips this time, and he can't help his own upturned grin as they pull apart. Eddie keeps a hand loose in Steve's hair and plays with the ends as they stare at each other, both letting their ragged breaths slow in the air between them.

"Believe me yet?" Steve says, his breath quiet and hoarse. Eddie huffs a laugh.

"With the way you manhandled me into the sink? Yeah, Harrington. I believe you," Despite the joke, the second half of Eddie's words land remarkably soft in Steve's ears. He pecks another kiss on the corner of Eddie's mouth and Eddie just laughs. "Fuckin' crazy," Eddie mutters.

"What is?" 

Eddie levels him with a flat stare and gestures between them, then seems to think better of it and quirks his head to the side and sweeps his hand out towards the door.

"This. You, mostly. But also like- all of this. Me doing the Time Warp with Steve Harrington and all that junk."

"Time Warp?" Steve asks and Eddie drops the hand that was carding through Steve's hair to his shoulder, giving him a theatrically flat stare.

"You cannot just kiss me within an inch of my life and in the same breath tell me you've never seen Rocky Horror."

"I don't even know what you're talking about."

"Furthering my point, actually. I assumed Buckley was better than this."

"Why would Robin have anything to do with this?" Eddie narrows his stare and shifts back a little, like he's just been caught with something. Steve narrows his eyes back. "Is this like- about this? Like- It's different," Steve gestures between the two of them, stumbling through his sentence by trying to convey enough without blatantly saying it. Eddie's eyes go wide for a split second before he catches himself, but it's enough for Steve to put the pieces together. 

"I know about Robin," He says, and Eddie visibly relaxes. "And while I'm not really sure how you know about Robin, I'm pretty sure we're on the same page," Eddie snorts and reaches behind him to his left side, then catches the cotton of his sweatpants instead of harsh denim and jerks his head to look behind him.

"Forgot I wasn't wearing my jeans," He murmurs, then turns back to Steve. "Anyways, dear old Buckley was actually the one to make friends with me. Apparently she saw the bandana hanging out of my pocket and put it together with my frequent talks of freaks and outcasts and general nerdiness, and called me 'brave yet slightly unhinged' to be wearing a black bandana in Hawkins of all places, then tapped at a little pink triangle pin on the front of her jacket," Eddie laughs and lowers his air quotes before continuing. 

"Of course, I had no goddamn idea what she was talking about, told her this was just a metal thing. I didn't know how she had somehow connected my bandana to my affinity for the male gender and consequent queerness," Eddie mimes tapping at his chest where Robin's pin would be, "But somehow she figured it out. As it turns out, there's such a thing as flagging. Hanky code, if you're a guy," 

The words hanky code draw a faint memory from Steve of him and Robin going through a magazine and a pamphlet she had managed to smuggle from her trip to California over Christmas with her parents. Most of the words were just swimming across the page for Steve, but Robin had gone on about this whole system that gay people use to signal to each other, diving into the different meanings of colors and placements of bandanas, carabiners, pins, everything. A whole new language, she had called it, then joked about learning to be fluent in Lesbian. Steve wonders how much of that this version of Robin knows.

"So she tells me what exactly my hanky means, and Jesus H. Christ I was not prepared to hear the message I was apparently putting on full vulgar display for the population of Hawkins. Very shocking to hear when your experiences are limited to sucking face with random guys in the bathroom of the hideout and behind your trailer. Luckily, it seems Buckley's the only one who noticed, or maybe even the only one who knows, but I haven't gotten around to changing it and I figure it passes enough as just an accessory that it'll signal enough to the right people, and be mundane enough to keep me discreet. So there's our thrilling backstory," Eddie finishes with a flourish of his hands, resting them at the edge of the counter after. 

"Well now I kinda wanna know just how badly you embarrassed yourself," Steve smirks and pokes at his cheek, Eddie batting his hand away.

"You can ask Buckley when you get back," Eddie says softly, and catches Steve's hand as it falls.

"You mean when we get back," Steve says and Eddie sighs. He squeezes Steve's hand, shaking his head as it falls forward with his eyes pinched shut. Steve's stomach bottoms out. "When we get back, right?" Eddie tugs on Steve's hand but keeps his head turned to the floor and his eyes closed. Steve lets himself sway forward.

"Steve."

It's somehow entirely different and exactly the same as the way Eddie had said his name earlier by the pool and between kisses just now. It's desperation, but also the melancholy that Steve had been trying to look past. It's harder to ignore now. 

"You're getting out," Steve says and tries to leave no room for discussion. Eddie's nose scrunches up. "What happened to trying?" 

"What happened to trying?" Eddie snaps, but there's an undertone of exasperation. "You think I want to go back to '86 just to die surrounded by bat corpses and chunks of my own flesh? Fuck, Steve. You heard El. There's no way out of this one," Steve grips harder onto Eddie's hand and wills him to look back up.

"That's not what she said," Steve says and Eddie scoffs. "She said that's what happened, but that doesn't mean it needs to happen again, it won't-"

"Like fuck it won't!" Eddie rips his hand from Steve's and it feels like the same sort of rage that burned in Eddie's fingertips in Steve's living room. He drops off the counter and pushes Steve back somewhere between a nudge and a shove, Steve trying not to choke on the feeling of Eddie's elbow shoving at his chest. "I'm not making it back, and I'm tired of everyone trying to tell me otherwise by walking on eggshells around me. Either I die in '86, or I die here within the next day or so. I'm breathing on borrowed time, and I don't need you trying to change my mind about it," Eddie's backed himself against the door with his arms folded across his chest, chin tilted up in defiance. It's a fighting stance, Steve recognizes. He's used it enough himself to know how to make himself seem untouchable. It's so different from how Eddie was sitting a second ago that it burns a hole in Steve's stomach. He knows his anger is misplaced, knows this should be the last thing he brings up, but he can't stop the words in time.

"So, what? This," He gestures between them and ignores Eddie's flinch, "Really was just a kiss at the end of the world for you? What about meaning it? You were just gonna, what- use me to get off and then fuck off to die without a second glance?" He didn't mean to say that. Steve knows it was absolutely the worst thing to say when Eddie's eyes turn cold and his laugh comes out cruel and dark and mangled. Immediately all his anger is replaced with icy regret.

"Go fuck yourself, Harrington," Eddie spits it, and there's nothing left from the man who's hands were tangled in Steve's hair a minute ago. He reaches for the door knob but Steve slaps a hand over it to stop him. Eddie's eyes snap up to him, vicious and possibly murderous.

"I'm sorry, that didn't come out right, I didn't mean-"

"I don't care what you meant. You said it. You just assumed that I'm a piece of shit with a death wish who likes to fuck with people in the same way that I've been fucked with my entire life," Eddie decidedly shoves more than nudges Steve away this time and cranks the handle open. Steve lunges forward and holds the door shut and Eddie all but growls.

"I need you to know that's not what I think of you," Eddie rolls his eyes, likely hard enough to hurt, and seethes at Steve but ultimately relents to not leaving the bathroom.

"That's not what it sounded like."

"I know. I'm bad with words," Steve says and Eddie laughs, but it's still mean and cutting.

"You mean you don't always tell someone you're into them and then immediately accuse them of using you for- what was it you said again?" Eddie mockingly taps his fingers against his chin before dropping the pantomime sarcasm in favor for a dead stare, "using you to get off and then fucking off to die?" Steve cringes.

"I shouldn't have said that."

"Yeah. No shit."

"I just thought…" Steve takes a moment to try and piece the words together. "I thought by 'meaning it' you meant meaning all of it. Us, but also getting out. Having the chance to be an 'us' in '86," Steve speaks slower this time, giving himself time to correct his words if he slips up. The anger in his throat has long since faded, and he watches Eddie's still burn bright in his cheeks. 

"I don't get that choice, Steve," Eddie's narrowing his eyes and Steve already knows he's going to sound like a broken record.

"You don't know that."

"I fucking well do! You were there when El said it."

"And I keep saying, that's not what she said!"

"She should have!"

"She didn't-"

"It would be easier if she did!"

There it is. Eddie deflates and slumps a bit against the door, more so simmering now than boiling. Steve doesn't say anything, just lets it hang between them for a second.

"I-" Eddie cuts himself off and grimaces, wiping his wrist across his forehead with a sigh. "I just don't want to hold onto hope that isn't-"

There's a shout from outside the door followed by a crash and a mix of voices all talking over each other. Eddie's head shoots up and he cuts a glance over at Steve before wrenching open the door. Immediately the noise becomes louder, but with it comes the sickly hum in Steve's veins that he's been hoping would leave him alone.

“What fresh fucking hell-” Eddie mutters as he throws himself out of the door way and around the corner back into the living room, Steve only a step behind. 

“-the fuck out of here!” Robin's voice carries high above the rest of the group, clear over the low thrum of the kids demanding over each other. Steve and Eddie burst into the living room at the crescendo of Robin's screech as another crash echoes through the room, this time a lamp off the side table next to the couch. The stained glass of the lampshade crackles as it hits the floor, a few of the sections shattering and littering the hardwood. The sound gets stuck in Steve's brain and warps into a buzzing and a high pitched shriek, drowning out the voices folding over each other. The pitch burrows into his skull and he pinches his eyes shut as it worms its way past his ears and into his eye sockets. It's buzzing and shattering and screaming all over again, an endless cycle that leaves no room to hear anything but screeching and his own panic.

“Ah, our newest additions. We're so glad we finally found you,” The shrieking stops, or rather it dulls, and gives way to a single voice that seems to be speaking straight through to Steve’s head. It's familiar in a way, but clipped and strange as if the voice isn't used to itself. The pressure in Steve's head lifts in an instant and the chittering becomes more of a high thrum instead of a sting, still blocking out the rest of the noise but somehow also quiet. He gasps in a breath and blinks his eyes open.

There's a man standing in the doorway to Robin's house with his hands folded at his front, his posture relaxed yet rigid. His eyes bore right into Steve's as he tilts his chin up as if challenging Steve to defy him. The action sends a wave of nausea rolling through him while everything clicks into place, the hum in his ears still blocking out the cacophony of voices and leaving only Robin's frantic waving to keep the kids back despite Max desperately trying to lurch forward to shove the man back out the door.

Billy Hargrove doesn't react to her, just lets her alternate between pushing at his shoulder and being reigned in by Robin and Dustin who are trying to shield a mostly unconscious El. Steve knows it's not Billy- the difference in his voice is more than just distortion from the ringing in Steve's ears. His cadence is off, his stance is off, the way his face smooths out instead of contorts and pinches is off. He's somehow already too far gone and is just a vessel in this moment, but the Billy Hargrove warning bells have already gone off in Steve's brain and he jerks a hand up to cover the scar just below his hairline from the plate anyways. It stings when he touches it, and he's not entirely sure it's placebo. 

Billy coolly cuts his gaze over to Eddie, narrowing his eyes as he does it. He blinks and a surge shoots up the side of Steve's neck in a flash of cold and grit. He sees Eddie flinch out of the corner of his eye, both of them glued to the spot from the chittering thrum and the ice in their veins. The whites of Billy's eyes darken from the edges as streaks of black start to shoot out into the centers and extend out to the veins just under his skin. They trail under his cheekbones and jaw, pulsing as they push across seemingly his whole body until there's a map of roots under Billy's skin growing darker by the second. 

Steve feels a similar pulse growing behind his eyes and tries to blink back the icy burn that seems to cut under his skin, but his body won't hear him over the drum of panic and ringing and slicing roots. Billy smiles at Eddie and him, and it's a look Steve has never seen Billy wear before. He tries to tear his eyes away but they're glued in place. The only thing that moves is the steady thrum of veins building under his skin. His throat barely contacts to breathe, much less to scream. 

He thinks Robin is grabbing his shoulder, but all his energy is being sucked towards the doorway instead of the warmth on his arm. His attention slips towards the creature in front of him, pulling out his consciousness like a spool of thread with every sickly pulse.

“You were not meant for us here,” The voice booms through his head and settles, suffocating the ringing and leaving only itself to be heard. “But we will have you anyways,” The words are sucked through the pulse under his skin and burrow into his cells, eating away at whatever was left of his warmth. “Now go.”

The ice in his veins shatters under the last command and floods his system, the only thing in his brain becoming cold, and us, and go. 

They feel themself move, attached through a line that pulses between them and the others. It hums under their feet and through the ground, spreading and branching like catacombs. Now though, they focus on the pulse in this space. 

It thrums between their flesh and the other two pieces, the other two connections. Take, the pulse beats. Grow, it says. They feel it all the way through to their ends.

The warmth is easy to find. They will make it easy to take. The warmth is bright and full, so ready to become part of the cold. There is warmth on their left. It is trying to cling deep. The warmth is ready to give. And so they are ready to take. 

They dig into the warmth. The other two pieces do the same. They can feel the other two. They stay with the warmth. They let the pulse grow. They let it extend. The warmth struggles. It tries to flee. They find it. There is other warmth in this space. 

They will grow.

They will find.

They will take.

They hold a different warmth. This one is smaller. It is easier to send a pulse. The warmth sits with their cold. It has nearly grown. 

A piece becomes severed, the pulse screeching and wailing and grieving as it strikes through them. They scream and shriek with the pulse, the remaining piece wails with them. 

They claw for warmth. The pulse cries. 

TAKE. FEED.

The pulse cuts into their core. It thrashes and shrieks and rings through them. It demands and steers and writhes from the depths. It rips at their seams instead of sews.

YOU MUST TAKE.

The pulsing cold is struck with a quake of fire. They scream. Their insides crackle and their breath is flame. The pulse and the writhe shrivels and screeches and bites. It claws at the cold, attempts to hold but only tears and rips. 

They are burning. The pulse is severing and they are burning through their core, shriveling up with it. They lose the other piece. They are left on their own. 

They are on fire.

And then they go black.

__________

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[azrielgreen]

So I've been rereading Prism again and wanted to mention a couple of things that I was just floored at when I caught them.

right at the end of Ch.2, Billy asks why Eddie got locked up, ‘Little trouble at a bar.’ Then he turns to Billy and smiles. ‘You know how it is.’ IS PURE EVIL OMG‼️ I think one of my favorite moments in this entire story is Eddie's reveal to Billy (as well as to the audience how long he's been keeping tabs on steve/orchestrating everything) & to reread this and see how EARLY ON, me as a reader, can witness Eddie being so patronizing/digging at Billy's trauamtic past is so chilling. it's such a short and sweet interaction that you wouldn't even really remember if not for a reread, SO GOOD!!🖤✨️

Also, in chapter 6 or 7? When Steve runs away from Billy and runs into Eddie in the woods, he age regresses and they have this moment where Steve calls Eddie his wolf and that he remembers him. Did he age regress with Eddie before Steve and Billy got together? I just wanted clarity on this bc I know little Steve does have moments of lucidity in remembering stuff that is currently happening but a lot of the time he /is/ just in the state of mind of the age he regressed into. I'm just slightly obsessed with the idea that Eddie and little Steve had a moment years before where Steve, even then, felt comfortable to regress since he really only does it around Eddie!!

Also on a more personal note, Prism Ch.16, you write about Steve and Eddie being made from the same star. When I was 14 and got into my first LTR, I told my partner that. and it's something I've said to maybe only two people, people who I feel innately connected to, soul mates, that we're made from the same star. And I've also always written that same sentiment into my fics as well as an adult now so I really connect with that so much. So it's just a fuzzy warm feeling to see steddie feel that way about each other but also that as writers even without knowing each other we can have a sort of connection through that as well and I've always just adored how you make connections to the moon and sky and weather in your fics anyway so when I read that my heart clenched UGH SO GOOD!!!!🖤🖤🖤

Thanks for sharing your stories! So excited for Prisms return!!!!🖤🥹✨️

MY DARLING??! These asks mean the fucking WORLDDDD to me, you have no idea!!!!??! 😭😭✨️😭✨️ so - first off THANK YOU! One thing about Prism is that it really does benefit from rereads. We wrote 80k+ before we ever published it so we had the opportunity to seed and foreshadow along the way a WAYS back, even chapter one. It always makes me so happy to see someone catch something!!!

Now, the "You're my wolf" thing with Little Steve gets asked about a fair amount and to avoid spoilers, I only ever answer vaguely and say that Steve's regression is a trauma response and that it's definitely happened before around people he felt a little bit safe with (it's never really happened with Billy) and that we will absolutely be exploring that more in the next 2-3 chapters leading up to the finale of Part 2. There are specific hints Little Steve mentions, tiny elements that will make sense later on but for the most part his recognition of Eddie comes from a place deep inside Steve that believes Eddie wouldn't hurt him.

This is such a beautiful, wonderful and affirming thing to share and I treasure it, thank you again.

All my love, Azriel

✨️🖤✨️

[wuffgang-ameowdeus-moozart]

steddie tbhk au. kinda. pt. 2.

---> part 1 :)

Read on Ao3 <3

Here is a short and comprehensive list of things Steve had been willing to give up when he decided to let the supernatural resolve all his problems:

- his free will (he didn't seem to make a lot of sensible decisions anyway)

- a painless existence (not like he wasn't used to it)

- never falling in love again (something he can't imagine himself doing anyway, he has never felt romantic feelings for anyone before Nancy before and the thought of feeling so strongly for anyone else seems ludicrous)

- his life (this one he'd have to think a bit on. Like, depends on how much time it wants)

Here is an even shorter and more comprehensive list of what he WASN'T willing to give away:

- his peace of mind

And yet. AND YET.

"Master! Master! Master of puppets is pulling your strings,,,,,dundundundun"

Steve feels almost sorry for whoever wrote this song. They don't deserve the pure burning hatred he feels for them considering he has never actually listened to it properly. Who knows, maybe he would've liked it if he had had a less atrocious introduction to it.

"MASTER! MASTER! Just call my name cuz I'll hear you scream! Master! Master!'

Hanako continues his riveting one-man performance. He slaps the teacher's butt when she turns around to write on the blackboard. She doesn't notice, of course, because Steve is the only one who is unlucky enough to be able to hear and see the menace. He is this close to exchanging his soul for some fucking peace.The whole thing would be a lot more amusing if Hanako wasn't also successfully covering the blackboard which contains everything he needs to know for the exam next week.Thanks, dude.

Laughing at my cries indeed.

But now Steve perks up. This is the only part from this wretched song he looks forward to. Because after that blessed line that hits a bit too close to home, comes the solo. Which means Hanako will be so focused on his air guitar, he will forget to screech around like a tortured banshee.

When Murray had warned them about "the dangers of the supernatural", this probably isn't what he'd had in mind. Regardless, Steve has received the message loud and clear: do not mess with the supernatural if you want your sanity to remain intact.

Unfortunately for his new ghostly acquaintance, Steve has been beat down by things outside of his control way too often not to take the rare chance to strike back. (He refuses to call them friends because: a) he is so obnoxious that his presence causes nothing more than deep annoyance and the occasional headache; and b) if Steve were to admit that they were anything more than that, that would mean that his only real friend is literally dead and can't be seen by most of the population, which would honestly just be extremely sad.)

When the solo seems to have reached its peak (the spirit dramatically headbanging as if his life depended on him, pun fully intended) Steve accidentally let's his eraser slip. His eraser that - on complete coincidence of course, Steve being captain of the basketball team has absolutely nothing to do with this - hits Hanako square on the face. Steve had expected the eraser to fall through him, maybe to irritate him at most. So it comes as a welcome surprise when his projectile actually hits his target in the face, Hanako apparently solid for some reason. Score. (He would later find out that the reason is that "it isn't a real headbang if you can't feel the whoosh whoosh of your hair")

The entire class turns to him at this sudden interruption, but Steve only has eyes for one particular menace. "Whoops, I'm so sorry", he says in his most insincere tone. It is a true tragedy when said target dramatically let's himself fall through the floor. Yeah, through. Can't even leave the classroom like a normal human being. What a dramatic bitch.

(No, he is not extremely bored afterwards. And he also doesn't hum the damned song under his breath. Shut the fuck up.)

--

Steve and basketball is a bit of a complicated thing. He may have first started because his father insisted, but he stayed out of his own volition. He liked the thrill of never knowing whether the ball would land until the last second. He liked the pleasant burn in his muscles after a harsh training. He liked how there was a camaraderie in the team that could only be forged by the ups and downs of a game with high stakes. And when he got made captain, he found that he loved that, too. He liked getting to know his players. Enjoyed how he could make up for their weakness and praise them for their strength. And he would be lying if he said that being looked up to - not being questioned on his every fucking decision for once - was a big fucking plus, too.

Times change. He has long learnt not to care about his parents opinions anymore. The thrill of throwing a ball pales a bit in comparison to the adrenaline rush of a real life or death situation. The camaraderie he had always felt at home in vanished along with his popularity.

But despite all that, he still loves the sport. Being captain of the team became his refuge from real life. Sure, Tommy who used to be his right hand man doesn't respect him anymore and has tried to start more than one mutiny (it is kind of hilarious to watch to be honest), and it is an understatement to say that the way the new Hargrove kid keeps intruding his space is disconcerting. (Or, according to Hanako, Gay with a capital 'G'). But this is something he has control over. This is something he knows he is good at. This is something that won't end in death if he accidentally makes a mistake.

He doesn't know why he is surprised when the coach calls him to his office on lunch break. His dismay worsens when he sees fucking Billy already waiting there. For a moment he wishes Hanako was here, if only to provide a distraction. He isn't sure where he disappeared to and to be quite honest it's making him a bit nervous. This isn't the first time he has thrown objects after him (more than one teacher already told him to get his "clumsiness" under control), but he has never stayed away for such a long time before. He had thought that that was their established dynamic: Hanako sings obnoxious songs and Steve hits him with a variety of projectiles. Which, thinking about it like that, does sound kind of bad...

The coach calls them in. Billy looks at him with a raised eyebrow and a mean grin, which could either mean that Steve had missed a jab at his expense, or could also just be his normal expression. To be honest, he doesn't care. Thank god that Hanako can distract him without physically being there. Which, technically he never actually is, but that isn't the point right now.

Coach looks at Steve in what he swears is disappointment and his heart drops. He knows his performance has suffered greatly the last few months. He knows he has had to sit out more and more because of injuries (most notably: a broken leg when he had to save one of his teammates from the monster living in the second shower stall, a concussion from when he accidentally stepped onto the fourth step of the stairs near the art room due to said broken leg, a bad cut on his right arm from when he fought against the bitter teacher that had died by the hand of one of his own students and thought the best way to get revenge was to keep ringing the bells 24/7 - something Steve normally would've just waited out until the ghost realized how futile that was, but had been absolutely unbearable because of his concussion. And so on and so on.)

As soon as they are released Steve walks away. No need to rub salt into the wound by looking at Hargrove's shit-eating grin. His legs automatically make their way towards the old moldy girls bathroom everyone does their best to avoid (short OMGBEA, or just OMG. Hanako finds himself absolutely hysterical). For a moment he considers finally cashing in his wish and make himself captain again, but realizes how ridiculous that it. It wouldn't be right, he'd feel like a fraud the whole time. It's just so fucking stupid. Yes, Billy is a better player than him, he can admit it. He definitely has more hoops than Steve and if you are the unfortunate soul he has decided to block, there is no way the ball is going anywhere (as he has experienced many, many times before). But Hargrove doesn't care about the team. He doesn't care about trying to turn his teammates into the best players they can be. He doesn't care about encouraging them or patiently explaining over and over again what they are doing wrong. Billy Hargrove is a selfish prick with zero patience, and Steve doesn't understand how coach can just not see that.

(No. Steve isn't crying. That would be stupid. Shut the fuck up.)

--

The bell rings.

Steve makes the executive decision that he doesn't fucking care. Not like he is going to make it far with his grades either way. His already dim chances of a sports scholarship were eradicated along with his title as team captain, might as well buy the alcohol and his seven cats while his parents are still financing him.

Somewhere between break and the end of first period Hanako appears. Steve is amused to find that he is just as extra when he believes to be alone. He stomps from one side to the other and runs his fingers through his already messy hair. Steve is pretty sure the only reason he is corporeal right now is for the satisfaction of hearing each step echo through the room.

"What the fuck- I know this fucker has chemistry, what the-"

"You know my timetable by heart?!"

Hanako looks up. His eyes are burning. Steve unconsciously takes a step back. Hanako follows. He takes another. Hanako does, too. They continue this little game until Steve's back hits the wall, and suddenly he is almost squeezed to death.

"OH MY FUCKING GOD I THOUGHT YOU WERE FUCKING DEAD YOU ASSHOLE"

Hanako let's him go for a second to punch him in the arm, only to dive back in immediately afterwards.

Steve still isn't quite used to it. Touching. He has never been very touchy feely with people. Or perhaps it would be more apt to say that people were never very touchy feely with Steve. When he was still together with Nancy, they mostly touched when they were making out or holding each other's hand in the hallway. But now with Jonathan? They hug and she pecks his cheek and he gives her piggy back rides and it fucking hurts. Not just that the girl he loves broke up with him, but that she is obviously so much happier with Jonathan. When he'd still been friends with Carol and Tommy, the two had always shared casual little touches between them that he could never partake in - even before they had gotten together. Maybe he had a huge sign on his forehead no one told him about: CAUTION! THIS PERSON WAS NEVER HELD AS A CHILD! SIDE EFFECTS OF CASUAL TOUCH MAY INCLUDE: BURSTING INTO TEARS

Maybe that is a warning only provided to the living or maybe Hanako just ignores it like everything else Steve tells (begs) him to, but fact is he is always touching him.

Steve will be trying to concentrate on a pop quiz, bending over the page in the hopes that the teacher can't see his increasingly desperate expression, when cold fingers appear in his peripherie and gently tuck back the strands of hair that had fallen into his eyes. Sometimes a whispered answer to a question will follow, but unless the subject is maths Steve has learnt the hard way that it's better to ignore that part. Or it will be a normal boring school day and suddenly Hanako will see it fit to sprawl himself all over Steve's shoulders. It could almost be considered a hug, except that one of the participants was mostly unwilling and what the other was doing could more accurately be described as "laying". Steve knows that Hanako can float, so he only puts his entire weight into it because he is a little shit. (He tries not to think about how it feels so fucking good)

It is truly an evil thing he is doing. Putting his head on his shoulder and hugging him from behind and being so fucking gentle it made him want to cry. How dare he make him realize how much he wanted this. How needy he is. And he knows that the fucker knows it, because sometimes he needs to run to the bathroom so he doesn't implode in the middle of the classroom and the motherfucker who is the entire reason for this situation will be laughing his ass off. (He is kind of scared of how used to it he is getting.)

Steve was not mentally prepared for the actually pretty painful punch to his arm that followed. Again. Couldn't even choose the other one.

For a second it looks like his same arm is going to be punched AGAIN, so he quickly traps Hanako's fists in his hands before he can go through with the unsaid threat.

"Why were you so sure that I'm dead?"

"WHY WEREN'T YOU IN CHEMISTRY FUCKER"

"I don't know, I think we have quite the chemistry between us-". It looks like he is going for a headbash him "I mean. I. Wasn't. Feeling like it."

"What do you mean you weren't feeling it"

"And I'm sure you always went to all your chemistry lessons mister carbon dioxide only has one oxygen molecule"

"When are you going to stop- wait. Were you crying?"

"I...No." Here is a fun thing you should know about Steve Harrington that makes his life stupidly harder: he is an awful liar.

"Did someone do something? Do I need to kill them? That's a rhetorical question, of course I have to"

He can't help but laugh. He knows the other is kidding. Probably. And he also doesn't think that sending Hanako after the coach is going to do much good. But the though it still amusing.

Steve had had full intention to not say what was actually bothering him. The spirit already teased him for being a jock, admitting he was devastated because he lost his position as team captain would just be giving him free fuel. He survived an entire school week of the other singing the entire Metallica discography on repeat. Everything he has suffered so far was so he could prevail now, and he would make sure it hadn't all been for nothing.

What he did not expect were the puppy dog eyes. Fuck. And as if that wasn't bad enough he invades his space and puts in the cutest fucking worried pout and FUCK.

Sometimes you need to be the bigger man and admit defeat. And as Nancy graciously reminded him again and again, true men DO cry instead of suppressing all their emotions. Fuck, it's so hard vocalizing things sometimes. He hates talking about his emotions. Ew. Maybe he should wish to become mute. Jesus H Christ.

"Wow you- uh you really care about...basketball. Don't you?" Hanako says the word 'basketball' as if it were a slur. Steve can already feel himself becoming defensive.

"So what?!"

Steve expects him to tease him. Make fun of him. But maybe he misjudges him because he...doesn't. Instead he tells him about D&D. To be quite honest, most of it goes right over Steve's head. He does gleam that the game has an awful lot of maths for something that is supposed to be fun, and that there is an entire vocabulary of acronyms his counterpart seems to think is common knowledge. But Steve doesn't mind. He has always loved watching people being passionate, loves the way their eyes will light up and their voice will fill with excitement. Hanako is no different.

The bell rings. Both boys ignore it. The spirit slowly loses steam and after a while both are laying on the dirty floor in silence. It's funny, they've never just been quiet together before. It's comfortable.

But there is one thing that won't leave his mind.

"Hey. Why...why were you so scared. When you didn't find me?"

"Can't I be worried for a friend? You know, you made quite a name for yourself in the supernatural community. That is not a place you want to be well-known in.".

"Bold to call us friends when I don't even know your name."

"It's...it's Eddie. Eddie Munson."

"Just Eddie?"

"I like to keep people guessing"

"I bet you're called like. Edwin or some old people shit."

"Yeah sure Steve Harrington"

[frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe]

destiel!steddie pt. 5!!

Pt. 1 | Pt. 2 | Pt. 3 | Pt. 4 | AO3: you can hear the call (when trouble's on the way)

‘We really shouldn’t be spying on him like this, you know that that’s not normal human behavior, right?’

“I am aware. I am merely making sure he’s safe.”

‘He’s in his bed, fast asleep. If anything, you should be standing guard outside. Standing over him like this is totally not creepy at all.’

The angel can hear the weird tone shift in Steve’s words, even when coming from inside his own being, but can’t quite remember what about the tone is supposed to indica–

‘It’s sarcasm, man, we’ve gone over this.’

Ah, that is what it was. “I will learn eventually.”

The human soul within him is silent for a bit longer, could’ve been hours, could’ve been just moments, but eventually speaks up again.

‘I gotta ask, is your obsession with him actually yours, or is me having the hots for him influencing things?’

He thinks on that for a while. He had been the first to jump at the chance to see Earth like his brother once did, wanting to know what it was about humans that had caused Castiel to forsake his kin.

It’s not hard to admit that what he had seen of Eddie before and after being pulled from hell was…significant. He was a beautiful soul. One that’d shone near blinding as he’d worked to piece him back together.

Eddie’s concern for others, his overwhelming love for his uncle and late mother, the scars of hurt the angel had found patched over already (though hastily, and with not as good of a seal that may have come from real healing, but something to be admired nonetheless)...

“It is not just you.”

‘...I can tell.’ Steve sounded breathless at the memories.

“He is a beautiful soul, and an admirable human.”

Another stretch of silence waned with another question from the soul within him. ‘Do you know why he’d gone to hell in the first place?’ Steve asked quietly, like he was afraid of the answer.

“He was there as a result of a deal with a crossroads demon.”

‘What’d he make a deal for?’

“He happened to find some of his Uncle’s medical paperwork. Made the deal not a day later.” He pauses. “His uncle didn’t find out about the deal until after Eddie’s year had expired, when he came home to find his nephew’s body, shredded by hellhounds.”

Steve’s heartbreak for the older Munson washed over the angel like a cold wave.

“They are alright, though I don’t think Wayne has fully forgiven his nephew.”

The two beings fall silent once again, staying invisible to anyone on the physical plane. It had admittedly been a bit of an adjustment to accommodate keeping Steve with him after visiting Hawkins, but the angel found he quite liked the human soul’s company. 

Since leaving Hawkins, watching over the Munsons like this over the last month and a half or so and helping Eddie on some cases too (the tulpa in North Carolina was definitely more of a pain than he would’ve liked), Steve has made understanding human idiosyncrasies much easier.

“I think you are right, Stephen, Eddie will be fine. We sho—” he’s cut off by a snuffling sound from Eddie, who rolls from where he’d been laying on his left side, to his stomach. His right arm comes up under his head and pillow, while his left is held loosely off to his side.

His face is turned to the left as well, and where they would have a clear view of his face, they only see Eddie’s wild head of hair.

Without thinking about it, the angel steps forward and gently pushes the hair away from the human’s face. 

‘He’s so pretty.’ Steve sighs from within.

“He looks…ethereal.”

Steve’s bubbling laugh tickles up the back of their head and they step back again from Eddie’s bedside. ‘Says the angel.’

They both admire the man for a moment longer before the angel steps back to take flight.

His wings are spread when they’re interrupted once again.

“Mmhmm…Steve..”

They both hold their breath.

‘Did he..?’

“Stevie..a–ah..”

Eddie is calling out for him; he needs them.

‘NO! Nopenopenope, time to leave!’ the human shoves at him internally.

“What do you mean? He is calling for us. I told him we would be there if he ever called.” He moves to step forward back to Eddie, but is surprised that he’s wholly unable to. “How are you–nevermind, let us go! He’s convulsing!”

Eddie continued gasping and writhing, though his movements seemed to be more rhythmic than anythin–

Suddenly, they are standing outside in the middle of the Munson’s junkyard.

“How–? Steve? How did you do that?”

‘Sorry, sorry, I had to get us out of there. That was definitely not something we should’ve seen.’

“I do not understand.”

Steve sighs internally. ‘I just know these things, okay? It’d be very embarrassing for him if he’d known we were there. Trust me.’

The angel’s thoughts reeled. “But he called for us.”

This time, Steve’s frustration with him came out as a loud groan, ‘He was dreaming of us. Probably an embarrassing sort of dream. One that should NOT be mentioned to him in person.’

“I do not know quite what you mean but–”

His mind was instantly inundated with images of He and Eddie in very compromising positions.

The angel felt hot all over. Strange, the weather hadn’t changed.

Steve chuckled at him, ‘It’s not the weather, it’s me–well, my body. You are reacting to what I showed you.’

“Oh.” It wasn’t a bad heat, though he did feel an added tightness along with the heat a bit lower down on his borrowed body.

Steve laughed again, ‘Yeah, “Oh.”. C’mon, let’s get out of here before you embarrass us or Eddie…go check in on Dustin or something.’

He still didn’t quite understand how having a dream like that may make one feel embarrassed, the act within Steve’s fabricated scenes seemed quite lovely, but He didn’t want to upset Eddie.

‘You’re something else, dude.’ Steve chuckles again at His thoughts as they fly back to Hawkins once again.

—--

From the moment Dustin wakes up, he can tell there’s something off. In a good way, though.

For one, he slept a lot better than he had in a while and two, his covers were actually still on him. Usually the nightmares of falling down cold elevator shafts and running through drafty underground tunnels cause him to throw them off the bed sometime in the middle of the night.

It really gave him a little extra oomph, which was good; his mom is going to drop him off at Will’s after running a couple errands and he had been doing his best not to be as much of a Debbie Downer around the other party members. 

So he gets up, makes his bed for once, brushes his teeth, and heads downstairs.

They’re done with their errands much quicker than he thought, and in no time at all he’s knocking on the Byers-Hopper clan’s front door.

“Hello Dustin.” El greets him, opening the door much wider than it needed to be.

“Hey Ellie, Will in his room?” He asks as he steps in.

“Yes!”

“Cool, cool, hey Ms. Byers!” he calls in greeting as he jogs through the kitchen and down the hall.

–

Dustin had gotten lost in writing up a backstory for his new character (a dwarf fighter this time, thought it’d be cool to run something out of his norm, okay?), when he looks up and sees Will adding some detail to a page in his sketchbook.

“Oh cool dude, you’re drawing again?”

“Yeah! I’ve got this new character I’ve been thinking about a lot lately.”

“That’s cool man, I’m glad you’re getting inspired again after everything.” He lets that sit for a bit before asking, “Can I see what you’re working on now?”

Will flushes. “I um….”

“No worries if you don’t want to show me, man, I’m cool.” Dustin holds up his hands in mock surrender.

“No, I…I want to show you, I’m pretty proud of this one, but it’s...just kind of embarrassing.”

“Ohohoho! Is it about your super ”not actually a crush” on a certain dark-haired friend of ours whose name rhymes with Bike Mealer?” Dustin grins widely, teasing his friend.

Surprisingly, some of the flush falls away from Will’s face as he laughs, “No, no, he’s not in this…yet.” Will smirks. “Also, how can that be the embarrassing part if you already know about it?”

Dustin just shrugs, “I dunno, man, that was just the first thing I thought of. Now lemme see!!” He makes to grab the sketchbook from Will, who holds it out of his reach easily with one long arm. 

Damn his growth spurt.

“Okay, okay, hold your horses!” Dustin sits back against the side of the bed. “Fine, you can read it. IF!” Will moves to hand it over, but pulls it away at the last second. “You promise not to make a big deal out of it, okay?”

Dustin nods enthusiastically, taking the offered sketchbook from his friend, though his face starts to fall as he takes in the pages in front of him.

“I didn’t really want anyone to know, but it’s been…healing? I guess? Making up stories for all of us after everything happened. Like, obviously it’s all completely unrelated to everything that’s happened, and it’s really dumb to pretend like Steve’s an angel now,”

Will glances up at Dustin briefly at the mention of Steve. ‘Shit, steer clear of that, c’mon keep rambling about something that’s not Steve!’ He yells at himself internally.

“B–but the real premise is based off these old books called Supernatural by Carver Edlund and I thought it’d be fun if we met a hunter too, like Sam and Dean in his books. As if that was the reason for the suicides at the high school, a-and Nancy is a badass so I’m thinking she ends up joining Eddie on some more hunts later, and…” Will stops as he registers the look on Dustin’s face.

Panicking, he tries to grab it away from his friend. “Okay, that’s enough,” but Dustin keeps it out of reach. “Dude, seriously, give it back, this is what I was worried about..” he makes another grab for it.

Dustin keeps it from him once again, but what he says next makes him freeze. “How the hell do you know Eddie?”

Will blinks at him owlishly. “What do you mean, ‘how do I know Eddie?’. He’s my character! I made him up!”

Dustin tears his eyes away from the page, meeting Will’s gaze. He looks like he’s about to pass out.

“Wait, how do you know about Eddie… Did you go through my shit??” Will manages to snatch the book back, though it’s most likely due to whatever state Dustin’s got himself in.

“...No.. No, I–” Dustin’s gaze is a thousand miles away. “I need to call Nancy.” He scrabbles up the bed and launches himself over Will and out the bedroom door. 

It takes Will a couple thumps of Dustin’s feet in the hallway for him to also spring up and follow his friend to the kitchen.

Dustin’s already dialing on the old home phone when he gets there. “Why do you need to call Nancy?” Dustin just waves off his question.

“Dust, seriously, you better not tell her about–” he’s cut off when Nancy evidently answers.

“Nancy! Nancy, it’s Dustin. Yeah, I’m fine; listen, I’m at Will’s and he just…I saw…” Dustin looks over and down at the sketchbook in Will’s hand. “No! No, he’s okay, you just…OK, you’re not gonna believe this, but he knows about Eddie! Yeah! And his uncle too.”

“Wha–how’d you know that was his uncl–”

“Yes, I’m sure, he freaked out when I asked him how he knew Eddie. No, that’s the thing, Will says that Eddie is a character he Made. Up.” Dustin emphasizes the last two words.

Until now, Will could faintly hear the elder Wheeler’s voice responding through the receiver, but at that. She was silent.

“Nance?”

Her voice came through once again, before Dustin was saying his goodbyes. “Okay, yep. Yep. Should I tell him?” Dustin looks at Will again. “Yeah, I’m going to. Okay. Call me as soon as you hear back. Ok, bye.”

Dustin turns back to will as soon as he hangs up. "Dude, you are not gonna believe this."

—--

Eddie wakes already mourning the loss of his dream from the night before.

It must be late morning by how bright it is in his room, but he really couldn’t care less. He’s too busy replaying the last bits of it he can still remember.

The feeling of Steve’s breath on the shell of his ear, the soft grunts that accompany each one, the sting from where Steve’s hand gripped into the hair at the back of his skull, in the feathers at the base of his wings (Wings! Again!), how entirely full he’d felt with Steve fully inside h–

He’s interrupted from his thoughts when he hears the landline ring downstairs.

“Damn, it’s only 11, let a man sleep in, huh?” Eddie grumbles as he throws off his comforter and stands, adjusting himself through his boxers.

He makes it downstairs, his dreams fully falling out between the slats of his brain like sand, finally answering the line on its second go around. “Munson residence.”

“Finally you answer, you need to get to Hawkins”

Eddie’s immediately 100% more awake and 110% less hard. “Nancy? Is everyone alright?”

“Yes, everyone’s fine, it will just be easier to explain if you’re here.”

“Okay, okay, I will head out now, let me pack and leave a note for Wayne.” he says, though he’s already grabbing up some laundry from the dryer, the phone’s cable stretched nearly as far as it would go.

“How long until you’re here?”

“It’d normally be, what, 14 hours? But I drive fast.” he shifts his hold on the phone so it’s shoved between his ear and shoulder as he attempts to dress himself and stuff clothes into his duffel at the same time.

There’s silence on the other end.

“Nancy? What is it?”

“Are you able to call Steve? He’ll probably want to know too.”

Eddie pauses, grabbing the phone again from his shoulder. “The angel or the man?”

“...Yes?”

He chuckles at that, “Yeah sure, I’ll ask Steve if Stevie wants to come along.”

“Come along where, Eddie?”

“FUCK–” Eddie jumps at the angel’s arrival “Damn it, I keep forgetting about that..”

“Eddie? Everything alright?”

“Yeah, yeah Nance, I’m fine. Steve’s here, so I will pack him up into the car too and we’ll be on our way.”

“See you tomorrow then? 8?”

“Sure, I’ll meet you at the diner, bye Nance.”

“Bye Ed.”

He hangs the receiver back on its cradle and drops his bag on the kitchen table, heading to the fridge and buttoning his pants up the rest of the way.

“Well, Steve? You up for a road trip?”

“Where are you going, Eddie?”

Eddie pulls the fridge door open and grabs up everything he’d need to make some sandwiches for the road. “That was Nancy, something is happening back in Hawkins. Wanna come?”

He whips up a couple bologna and mustard, and a couple good ol’ fashioned PB&J while the angel thinks it over.

“Very well Eddie, I will come with you. You are leaving now?”

“Yep! Well, as soon as I pack up some more road snacks. Those are very important.” He wraps the sandwiches in paper towels and throws them in a nearby cooler tote. “Grab some pop outta there, will ‘ya?” He gestures toward the fridge with his chin and grabs a couple more snacks. A bag of popcorn here, some leftover halloween candy there…is that expired?

“Steve said this is what you meant by ‘pop’.”

Eddie looks over to the angel who is holding a single can of Pepsi and chuckles.

“Yeah, that’s pop, bud. Can you grab like one or..12 more of those? Thanks.”

He goes back to what he was doing but something clicks.

“Wait, did you say ‘Steve said…’?”

The angel turns back to him, one arm miraculously full of 12 loose cans of cola. “Yes.”

“Steve. As in our Steve? He’s still in there with you?” He holds out the cooler for the cans which go in haphazardly at best. Damn now his sandwiches will be flat.

“Yes, your Steve. He..decided to stay with me here in his body.”

Eddie blinks once. Twice. “That’s such a paladin move.” he shakes his head and zips up the cooler. “Ya hear that Stevie? You don’t need to protect everyone all the time, doofus!”

The angel is silent, but tilts his head. “Steve says ‘That’s Dingus to you.’. Does that mean something?”

“Nah, that’s nothing to worry about.” he chuckles. “You ready to go, angel?”

“I am ready…human.”

Eddie’s brows shoot up into his hairline. “Did you just make a joke?”

“I did, yes.” The angel’s hand comes up to touch Eddie’s forehead with his first two fingers but he waves him off.

“Nuh uh, Big Boy, last time you zapped me somewhere I didn't poop for a week.” Ugh the dreaded week post Carolina tulpa hunt. Eddie shudders at the thought. “Nope. Never again. We’re drivin’.”

Eddie nudges at the angel to head out the door, hitting the lights and locking the door behind him as he goes. He turns around to find Steve still standing on the porch.

“Let’s go! Let’s go!” He shoos him toward the passenger side. “Get your fine, feathery ass in the car, Steve.”

“What is my rear fine for?” Steve asks him over the roof of the Impala, head tilted as usual.

Whoops. “Hopefully it’s fine for sitting. Now hurry up and use it to sit upon thine seat so we can go!” Nailed it.

—

They settle into the drive, Eddie immediately starting in on the ‘road snacks’ he’d packed at the house. They’re listening to Dean’s old cassette tapes, and the angel finds he quite likes the metal and hard rock, much to Steve’s dismay.

He’d been focusing on bobbing his head along to the sounds like Eddie had been when the other man turns down the stereo’s volume.

“So, you’ve got Stevie in there with you, huh?”

“Yes. He has been helping me understand human actions and emotions better. It makes it easier having him within my own head to…translate, I suppose would be the best way to put it.”

“Oh yeah? What is your favorite humanism so far?”

The angel thinks on that for a moment. “I would like to say it is your sarcasm. How you are able to communicate the complete opposite of what you are actually saying just by the tone of your voice, and that most everyone understands the same tone; but it, in of itself, is hard for me to catch onto so it is hard to say that it is my favorite.”

Eddie nods along to that. “Makes sense.”

“I think my favorite thing is when humans make up words on the spot for particularly difficult things to describe.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

“Well, you did just ask me what my favorite ‘humanism’ is, and I don’t believe that is a real word; though I did understand what you were trying to ask.” Steve acquiesces with a small smile in return.

“That’s a good answer, angel.” Eddie turns his head from the road momentarily to smile at him and the borrowed heart in his chest squeezes at the sight.

“So you said you have many siblings, are you close to any of them?”

“Only to Levanael, she is…to humans, she’d be my twin.”

“Steve has one of those!”

“Steve does not have siblings.”

Eddie scoffs, “Try telling that to him and Robin.”

‘Don’t actually try, I know she isn’t actually my twin.’ Steve says from within, in a tone that betrays the smile he’d wear if he had one. ‘He is only trying to relate the similarities between us.’

They talk on and off for the next several hours, and though he already knows everything there is to know about Theodore Munson, the angel listens intently for Steve. For him to learn more about the hunter.

It’s nearing 6pm when Eddie starts taking wide cracking yawns.

‘He’s barely been singing along through the last tape.’

“Are you alright, Eddie?”

“Hm? Oh, yeah, just didn’t sleep too well last night. I’ll be fine. Only about five or six more hours to go.”

“You were sleeping just fine when--”

‘Shhhhh! Shush!!’

Eddie’s eyes open noticeably wider, though still locked in the road in front of him. “When?”

“When I checked in on you last night.”

‘Damn it, shut up!’

“You called for me in the middle of the night, so I came to check on you. Steve said you must’ve just been sleep-talking so I left.”

Eddie relaxes minutely hearing that.

‘Nice save. Now ask him if he wants me to drive so he can sleep.’

“Would you like Steve to drive?”

“No, no I’m still good. Promise.”

‘Liar.’

“Eddie, you are swerving off the road. Please allow Steve to take over.”

Eddie yawns another huge yawn. “Fine, fine, you win. Don’t crash her.”

“Who is ‘her’?”

“Nevermind, angel.” Eddie shakes his head with a short laugh, pulling off to the side of the road and parking the car.

The angel closes his eyes and retreats, allowing Steve to take back over his body.

Shrugging back into control, Steve gets out, leaving the passenger door open for Eddie.

Passing the other man around the hood, Eddie says, “Hey, Stevie, missed you.” before he devolves into another long yawn.

Steve chuckles, “I missed you too, Eddie.”

He climbs into the driver’s side and closes the door, a comment about the hilariously butt-shaped indent on this side of the wide bench seat on the tip of his tongue, only to look over and find the other man already snoring softly where he’s leant up against the passenger door.

“Sleep well, Eds.” is what he says instead, pulling back out onto the highway.

—-

Eddie dreams of arms around him, carrying him.

He’s also in pain, surely in the dream only, but it’s agonizing nonetheless.

He manages to open his eyes, to find Steve above him. Hurt and worry really don’t suit his features. A face like that only ever deserves to have calm and happy emotions painted across it.

Eddie hurts, he feels heavy with the pain in his sides, his chest, his face, but he needs to help Steve. Take away his worry.

He moves his arm so he can cup Steve’s face but It’s slow going, as if he’s fighting through molasses.

He finally manages it though, and Steve looks down at him in surprise. “Hey Stevie..” Wow, his voice sounds wrecked.

“H–Eddie? Hi Eddie, stay with me, alright? We’ll get you out of here. Don’t worry.” Steve’s voice is shaky. Where are they anyway? He’s only looking up at a sky; a dark, dark, sky whose clouds are illuminated every once in a while by flashes of red.

Damn, his imagination is something else.

“No worries, b-big boy, you’ve got me now, huh?” He tries to grin, smile at some inside joke (he couldn’t quite say where from), but the motion stings the left side of his face.

Steve chuckles faintly though, so he counts it as a win. “Yeah Eddie, Harrington’s gotcha. I’m not gonna leave you here.”

“S-sweet. I’m just gonna…take a quick nap, ‘kay?”

Eddie doesn't manage to hear Steve’s response to that though, as he’s woken up by the sharp pinging of his alarm. 

“Wazzat..?”

“Hey, Eds, you good over there?”

Eddie rolls over to the sound of a voice, “Steve!” He says once he’s blinked the sleep away from his eyes enough to recognize the yellow blur seated at the end of the other bed.

“Hey, Eddie.” Steve smiles warmly at him.

“I was just dreamin’ about you.” Eddie rolls back over and presses his face back into his pillow.

“Only good things, I hope?” there’s still a smile in his voice.

That gives Eddie pause. “No, actually,” he rolls back over and sits up fully. “You were carrying me, and I must’ve been hurt pretty bad, we were both covered in blood and…you looked so sad, Stevie.”

Steve’s got a sad, worried frown on his face.

“Yeah, just like that!” Eddie points at him accusatory. 

“Well of course I’d be sworried. I don’t want to lose you!”

“....Did you just combine the words ‘sad’ and ‘worried’ into ‘sworried’?”

Steve says nothing.

“Fuck, that's adorable.” Eddie mumbles (mostly) to himself and pushes himself up off his bed. “How’d I get in here, anyway? I don’t remember walking.”

“I carried you in once we got here.” Steve hands him a pair of jeans and a henley, “Hey, maybe that’s why you had a dream about me carrying you.”

Eddie just shrugs, and pulls on the offered clothes. “Makes sense. Alright, let me go do the patented Munson three-step beauty routine and we’ll get outta here.”

Steve smirks at him. “Three whole steps, huh?”

“Shit, Shave, and Sh-brush my teeth.” Eddie counts out on his fingers.

He really, really, likes the sound of Steve’s laugh.

Pt. 6 here!

wooooo part 5!! I don't think I have any notes for this one, onto the tags!: @undreaming-rambles, @thefreakandthehair, @potentialheartofdarkness, @munsonfamilyband, @evix-syne666, @mightbeasleep, @hardboiledleggs

[justmeinadaze]

We're A Family Part 9 (Steddie X You)

A/N: Ok, I did warn you people so don't come at me lol Good feels and bad feels abound. Idk where this came from. Probably from some person stuff Im struggling with. But alas...Enjoy!

Warnings: Smut, ALL the angst, and fluff at the beginning and end to warm your souls, Someone from Eddie's past comes into play so his trauma is mentioned (i.e Child abuse and his mom leaving), Dylan talks a bit about his feelings with Charlie. I think those are the big triggers here.

Word Count: 4127

“I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream I know you, that look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam And I know it's true that visions are seldom all they seem But if I know you, I know what you'll do You'll love me at once, the way you did once upon a dream.”

You grin from your place on the floor as you watch Eddie strum his guitar and sing as Steve holds her hands while she tries to balance on her feet. 

Aurora’s first birthday was coming up and you felt like time was just flying by. Steve had started school, choosing to utilize the night program so he could at least spend time with the kids while they were awake if he was off that day. Eddie had just recently been promoted to manager at the auto shop which he had originally accepted because it paid more but found that he actually enjoyed the work it provided. 

Dylan seemed to be getting along ok and was his usual happy self. While he still loved playing the guitar, he asked you if he could sign up for the Hawkins little league team and had steadily grown to being one of the best players on the team. When you picked him up from practice one day you noticed how his face changed as he hit the ball, like he was letting out all his frustrations with the tiny bat in his hands. 

After what happened your son barely brought up Charlie, following through with calling Steve and Eddie “dad” whenever he addressed them. You sent him texts of updates regarding Dylan but Vivian was the only one to ever reply and usually it was something simple like “Thank you.”

“What’s mama concentrating so hard on, huh?”, Eddie smiled as he looked your way.

“We’re going to have her birthday here, right?”

“Yeah, why not. Wayne said he’d be able to make it and I have the day off.”

“Me to. I made sure to ask for it like 3 months in advance.” Steve flops down on the floor, Aurora wiggling out of his grasp to crawl to the metalhead as she pats on his guitar. “My mom will be swinging by. I assume Robin and Kierra to, of course.”

“I have some friends at work that want to come and bring their kids. Dylan knows a few of them.”

“That will be fun for him. Maybe I can invite the guys. I know they’ve been wanting to see her again.” Eddie leans forward and kisses the baby’s cheek making her giggle. 

You stretch out on the floor in front of you and she promptly crawls towards you bumping her head into yours. “Ow. You have a hard head.” You reach out to mess with her curls the way they do. 

“She’s a headbanger like me. Yeah? Just like dada. Dada?” Eddie chuckles as she falls back on her butt, watching him speak before looking over at you. 

“Dada? Can you say that? Say I’m just like dada.” Both men laugh until a breathy sound escapes her tiny mouth. You grin at her encouragingly as they completely freeze. “There you go. Come on, baby. Dada.”

“Da…da.”

“Oh my god.” Eddie quickly picks her up and places her on his lap as Steve pulls out his phone. “Can you say it again? Who am I? Am I dada?”

“Da…dada.”

He hugs her to his chest as the three of you smile excitedly. “That’s right, princess. I’m your dada.” He turns her around to face Steve. “That’s your dada to.”

You scoot towards the other man and point at his chest as her wide eyes watch you intently. “Dada?” She follows your finger as you point between them repeating the phrase hoping she doesn’t get confused. Her little hand reaches towards Steve’s phone and he pulls it out of her reach as she crawls towards him, headbutting his chin before he places a kiss on her head. 

“Da…da.” She falls onto her back looking up at him as she reaches her hand out again. “Da…da…da.”

##############

“No, she can’t be talking yet.”, Wayne grins as he bounces the baby on his hip. “You need to stay a baby as long as possible. Your dad grew up too fast and I hate it.”

You grin at him as Dylan and the other kids run past you out to the backyard where some of your friends were sitting on the patio talking amongst themselves. 

“Yeah, Steve went from toddler to high schooler in the blink of an eye.”, Mrs. Harrington smiled from her place at the table. 

“Stop it, both of you!”, you giggle. “I still haven’t accepted that this year my son will be 9. I can’t even think about high school.”

The boys were both outside entertaining the older kids while you started cleaning up some of the plates from the table and putting away the left-over food. A knock on the door startled you as you looked in that direction. 

“That’s weird. No one else should be coming…” Drying your hands, you head towards the front door. A beautiful, older woman a bit younger than Wayne stood before you smelling to high heaven like cigarettes. Her long black hair cascaded down her shoulders over a Van Halen t-shirt and some obnoxiously tight blue jeans. There was something familiar about her but you couldn’t exactly pinpoint what it was. “Can I help you?”

“Hi. Uh, does Edward Munson live…here?”, she asked as she looked around behind you. 

“May I ask what you need with him?”

“Or even Wayne… I recognized the truck outside…”

You leaned back, gently calling for the man as he strode over. He froze in place when their eyes met. 

“You can’t be here.”

“Wayne, I need to talk to my son.”

“You should have done that 15 years ago, Lynn, when you left him on my doorstep.” He frustratingly sighed as his eyes met your panicked ones. “I got this, Y/N. Go ahead and get back to your guests.” Wayne stepped further out and closed the door behind him. 

Numbly, you headed back to the kitchen where Steve was talking with his mom who was holding Aurora. He noticed immediately something was off, running to your side. 

“Baby, what’s wrong?”

“We…we need to keep Eddie outside.”, you whisper. 

“Honey, why? What’s wrong with Eddie?”

The man himself comes in holding Dylan upside down in his arms as the small boy laughs. You both meet his eyes and he blinks as he flips his son back around, placing his feet on the ground.

“What’s wrong?”

“Eddie…I…”

“No, Wayne! I have every right to at least talk to him!”

“Lynn! This isn’t your house!”

Eddie’s mom rounded the corner, her eyes locking with his. “Edward.”

“Mom?”

################

You and Steve busied yourselves around the living room, cleaning up from the party. Everyone had gone home and Dylan had taken Aurora up to her room before laying on the floor to keep her company while everything unfolded. 

“Why don’t you go upstairs to, Y/N?”, Steve whispered. 

“Steve Harrington, if I didn’t leave you alone with your father what makes you think I’d even consider leaving him here with her.”

“Because Wayne and I are here to keep him safe.”

All three Munson’s sat at the dining room table silently as Eddie glared into the void with his arms crossed, his leg bouncing under the table. 

“Whose birthday is it?”, she asked, sighing when no one answered. “I’m going to guess from the pink cake I saw that woman put away it’s the baby girls?”

“’That woman’ is my wife and ‘the baby girl’ is my daughter.” Eddie’s tone dripped with venom and it killed you. Eddie rarely ever got angry and even when he did it wasn’t anywhere near the level Charlie had gotten to more than a few times. The only time you ever heard him really scream and shout was during D & D or on stage. 

“Um, can I smoke in here or—”

“No.”, everyone responded in unison.

“Jesus, fine. It’s not a big deal, you know. I used to smoke around Edward all the time.”

“Yeah, that’s why I’m so well adjusted. Either that or the abandonment.”

“Look, Lynn, just tell the boy why you’re here so you can be on your way.” Wayne seemed more in control than his nephew but his anger was just as strong as he glared at the woman across from him. 

She exhales as she straightens up in her seat. “I, uh, have you spoken to your father?”

It was Steve’s turn to sigh as he sat at the foot of the stairs, you leaning against the wall in front of him where you could still keep an eye on everything. 

“What reason would I have to do that?”

“Because he’s your father.”

“Oh, fuck you. Do you really want to play that game right now?!”

“Eddie!” Wayne extended his arm towards the boy, gesturing for him to calm down. “Get to the point, Lynette.”

“He needs help. Your father has an opportunity to get his sentence reduced but he needs character witnesses. We thought…maybe…”

You growled as you began stepping forward, Steve immediately reaching out to grip your arm and hold you in place. 

“I don’t think my testimony would help. ‘Yes, your honor, he may have taught me how to boost cars, threaten people, and beat the shit out of me but I assure you he’s a really great guy!’”

“Eddie, he wasn’t perfect but he did the best he could.”

The metalhead chuckled as he rose from his chair, clenching his fists as he paced in place. “Best he could… Wayne did the best he could. I fucking do the best I can for my kids. Dad did jack shit for me and I still haven’t gotten an apology…from either of you!” 

Your heart breaks as you watch him get slowly wound up.

“Is that seriously all you showed up for after all these years? To ask me to lie for him? You seriously are amazing. You hunt me down, show up at my daughter’s birthday party, barge into our house… you don’t even bother to try and get to know me or my family…just thought ‘hey I’ll see if he’s available to lie to a judge. He definitely has nothing to lose.’”

“How did you know where he was?” All heads turn to you as you step into the area turning to face his mother. “Who told you where to find him?” Your eyes meet as she sighs again. 

“Jesus fucking Christ, Lynn.”, Wayne groans. 

“He still has friends in town including some that work at the plant with his uncle…”

Eddie’s gaze shift between the three of you trying to figure out what you all know.

“How long have you been talking to him?”, you ask. When she doesn’t answer the anger in your body starts to boil over. “Eddie has a right to know especially since he never even got so much as a fucking postcard! Yet you can keep in touch with his asshole dad.”

“Allen is my husband—”

“And Eddie was your son! How fucking dare you—”

“Baby, come on.” Steve comes up behind you and tugs you to him. “Remember, there are kids in the house. Calm down.” He reassuringly rubs your arms as you aggressively huff in his chest.

“How long?”, Eddie asks. “Since he went in?” He laughs when she nods. “Get the fuck out of my house.”

Her jaw tightens as she stands, reaching in her pocket to place a card on the table. “I’ll be in Hawkins for the next month or so. If you change your mind, just call me here.” 

Wayne walks her out as you and Steve watch the metalhead continue to fume.

“Eddie…”

“No! No one come near me right now!”

He continues to bounce on his toes as his fingers run frustratingly through his hair before abruptly hurling his fist through the air and punching the nearby wall. 

############

“Where are we going?”

“Oh, come on, Ed. You know by now 90% of the time we all get into a car, it’s bound to be a surprise to at least one person.”, Steve grins. “And like always, Dylan is the mastermind behind this venture.”

You son smiles from his place in the back seat as the other man pulls up into a parking lot. 

“Aren’t these the batting cages he practices at?”

Dylan hops out of the car, ushering for Eddie to do the same as he takes his hand with Steve following behind. You linger back to gather Aurora and allow your son to work his magic.

He leads the metalhead towards an empty area explaining to him why the helmet is important and which type of bats he prefers while his other dad finds a bench near the cage, motioning for you to sit beside him. 

“Ok, so when the ball comes, you’re going to want to swing as hard as you can.” Eddie understood enough about sports to get that was a given but, for Dylan, continued to react like this was all new information for him. 

When the first ball shot out, he swung and missed. 

“No, dad, that’s ok. I know it can be a bit fast. You have to try and keep your eye on the ball as it comes towards you and lower your hands a bit.” 

The ball shot out again and this time Eddie hit it, sticking out his tongue towards you and Steve as you both cheered in your little area. Aurora noticed and began pressing her hands together as she smiled, pointing her tiny fingers in his direction. 

The next few balls that head his way, he hits and sends towards the net on the other end that makes your son smile with pride. 

“Now, when I play, sometimes I think about… my other dad…how angry he makes me.” Eddie’s eyes meet his as he continues. “I think about how he left and how he treats my mom. How he never wanted to spend time with me like you guys do…”

Steve reached for your hand when he noticed your body stiffen as you watched them. You couldn’t hear what your son was saying but he looked so heartbroken. 

Eddie took his stance again, images flashing through his mind of his parents and how they treated him when he was a kid.

“Jesus Allen, how am I supposed to send him to school looking like this?!” His mother gestures towards the fresh welt on Eddie’s face from where his dad had smacked him. 

“Look, the little fucker almost got us caught! He cut the wrong wire and the fucking car alarm went off.”, his dad growled. 

The crack of the bat hitting the ball made you jump as he hit it harder than he had before. Over and over again, Eddie swung as hard as he could, not thinking about form or how his hands should be. With each memory he let loose, feeling the weight of the last few days lift off him. 

The machine tossing the balls whizzed to a stop as the metalhead panted, trying to catch his breath. 

“Dada.” Aurora reached his way before clapping like she had seen you do.

Eddie’s head hung as he began to cry, wrapping his arms around Dylan’s shoulders as he came to hug him. Handing the baby to Steve, you entered the cage tugging them both into your embrace. 

############

That night Eddie crashed between both of you, you clinging to his back as his head rested on Steve’s chest. While you two slept, Steve laid awake thinking about the last few days and everything the man he cared about was feeling. He hated that he couldn’t wave a wand and fix the pain the metalhead was feeling. Even though he had a much more violent up bringing in the beginning than Steve ever did, he knew what it was like to feel that abandonment when it came to both his parents. He was so grateful that his mom was being more present while trying to be better and he so desperately wanted that for you both.

Eddie’s palm moved against the boy’s chest as a tiny grumble left his lips. 

“Steve? Why are you still awake?”

“Thinking.”

“Hm. Well stop it. You have work tomorrow, man.”

“Ed, you know I love you, right? You can talk to me about anything…”

“Geez, you’re starting to sound like Y/N. ‘Would you still love me if…’”, he changes his voice to sound like yours as he smiles. 

“I’m serious, Eddie.”

Eddie opens his eyes fully as he pushes up on his elbow to look down at Steve. “I know. I just… Honestly, I thought I had left all that in the past.”

“What triggered everything these past couple of days? Was it just seeing her again?”

“Partly. Most of it was finding out she had still been talking to my dad. Couldn’t manage to pick up a fucking phone to call me but can take the time to write letters to her abusive, criminal husband. It just made me feel like I was ten all over again being left behind.”

Eddie felt your arms tighten around him as you nuzzled into his back between his shoulder blades. 

“Are you going to talk to your dad?”

“Wayne is my dad.” Steve nods in understanding before rolling on to his side to face the other boy. “Thanks, Steve. I, uh, I know we don’t…do the whole romantic thing like we do with Y/N but I do know you love me and, of course, I love you.”

“Of course.”, the boy chuckles as he reaches for Eddie’s face pulling him in for a gentle kiss. 

The other man giggles as Steve’s kisses get bolder and more passionate. “I’m kinda limited with this seatbelt around my chest.” His grin grows when he feels you hug him tighter before kissing his shoulder.

“You like it.”, you mumble with a smile as you release him from your hold and stretch. 

Steve pushed Eddie on to his back, immediately attaching his lips to his neck as he sucked and nibbled on the metalhead’s sweet spot. He lightly moaned as he turned to meet your soft but worried eyes. 

“You okay, baby?”

Eddie nodded as his thumb reached out to glide along your bottom lip before he pulled them to his own. He needed this, needed to feel and taste you both; the two people in this world that loved him unconditionally. 

Steve placed feathery kisses down his chest, reaching down into the boy’s shorts to pull out his cock. After scooting down the bed, you grab the waistband around Eddie’s hips, removing the garment to allow for more access. 

As you run your fingers through Steve’s hair, he leans down over the man’s length and a long line spit falls over the tip. Eddie groans as he strokes it with his palm, coating him with his saliva before taking him in to his mouth.  

Tilting your head, you drag your tongue along the parts of his cock he isn’t able to reach as one of your tiny hands reached to massage his balls.

“Jesus… that feels…feels so good.” 

Steve’s mouth came off him with a pop, his own tongue tracing the veins to his shaft where it found yours. Eddie perched up on his elbows, watching as you two kissed with his cock between your lips. You took over so the other man could hastily remove his boxers.

Eddie sat up, grabbing your jaw and pulling you in for a sloppy kiss before falling back down to his pillow with you in tow. 

“Turn, princess.”

When he released you, you tore off your shirt as you rolled over so your back was flush to his chest. He roughly yanked off your underwear, mewling as he glided his tip through your folds. 

“Take whatever you need, Eddie. I’m yours.”

You both moaned as he pushed himself into your entrance, kissing your neck as his arms held you tightly to him. 

The bed moved slightly as Steve laid behind him, gripping his hips as he guided his cock slowly into him. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck…”, Eddie panted. The sound of their heavy breathing was driving you crazy as your pussy clenched around him. “Ha-harder, Steve.”

As he honored his request, you push your hips back against his own, meeting each thrust with a moan that had Eddie’s eyes flutter closed. You clung to his hand as you craned your neck as much as you could to see their faces. 

Steve abruptly pulled out, grabbing Eddie’s waist and tugging him out of you and onto his hands and knees. The metalhead’s hair hung with his head as the other boy thrust back into him, one of his palms reaching out absently for you. 

Sliding underneath him, he lifted his arm so you could find his cock and guided it back into your dripping cunt. With this new position it gave him more leverage to utilize his hips he pumped into you and pushed back onto Steve. 

“God, you both feel so fucking good.”

You whimpered as you felt the coil winding in your belly, extending your hand between you as you rubbed your clit. 

“Eddie, yes. Please… don’t stop.”

The boy pushes up on his knees and Steve wrapped his arm around his chest to keep him steady as he pounded into you. You glance up at them with admiration as Eddie’s eyes close and Steve’s head leans against his shoulder. How did I get so lucky?

“I love you.”

Both sets of eyes look down at you as you softly smile before covering your mouth with your palm, your back lifting off the bed as came. Eddie’s face scrunches in pleasure as he grunts and cums inside of you. Steve tilts him forward slightly, gripping his shoulder as he thrusts his seed into him. 

The metalhead lifts you, bringing you back up more comfortably towards the pillows and settles beside you. You play with his hair as his head rests on your chest, his arm and leg slung over your body.

“I love you to. I’m sorry if I’ve been kind of out of it these past couple of days.”

“Eddie, baby, you don’t have to apologize for something like that. I…we just hate seeing you hurt, ya know?” His mess of curls graze your chin as he nods. “I heard you answer Steve’s question but if you change your mind, we’re here for you.” 

You giggle when a shirt hits your face. “Your daughter is babbling. Clothes, beautiful people.”

You and Eddie playfully whine as he pulls on his shorts and you throw on his shirt right as Steve bounces in with a bright eyed one year old. 

“Ma’am, it is 4am. Why are you awake?” She grins as she reaches for you. “Is it because daddy let you take a nap?”

Steve holds up his hands defensively. “Okay, okay. I get it. I messed up.”

Aurora smacks Eddie’s chest and he pretends to wince. “Ow, child. I’m fragile.”

“Dada.”

“Ok, princess. You mastered dada. What about the person that pushed you out, huh?” You laugh as you lean on his shoulder. Steve climbs beside you, tenderly reaching out to smooth her hair. “Mama? Say mama?”

She rubbed her eyes as she looked around the room babbling incoherently. 

“Yeah, that’s about right.”, he chuckles. Both men try to mimic what you had done before pointing at you and repeating the word. 

There was a small knock on your door and as soon as you granted permission, Dylan’s sleepy frame came into view. 

“Why are you up, weirdo?”

“I had to go pee—”

“Thanks for the update.”

He lazily smiles at Eddie. “AND I heard you talking to Ro.”

Steve gestures him over and helps lift the boy onto the bed. “We’re trying to get her to say ‘mama’.”

Dylan grins, poking the baby’s nose making her laugh before he does the same to you. “Mama.” Her eyes widen as he does it again, absorbing his motions. Your son repeats the action, this time saying nothing when he touches your nose. Aurora’s face scrunches just like yours when you’re annoyed. 

Her tiny finger reaches for your face and you lift her to her feet as she pokes your nose like he did. 

“Ma…ma. Ma.”

“Well shit.”, Steve chuckles.

Dylan smiles in triumph as he kisses his sister’s cheek. “Dad! You can’t talk like that. We have a baby in the house.”

############

@adequate-superstar @kalinaselennespeaks @alienthings

@notasimp4joey @manda-panda-monium

@decadentwombatmiracle @katie-tibo @marsupiooo

@local-stoner-bitch @steamystrangerfics

@lunatictardis @adaydreamaway08 @hazydespair

@actuallyspencerreid @moviefreak1205

@waylandmorgernsternherondal-blog

@kik51199 @strngrlytn @idkidknemore @damon-loves-pie

@k-k0129 @micheledawn1975 @eddie86baby

@justmeandmymeanderingthoughts

@3rriberri @sashaphantomhive @chelebelletx @big-ope-vibes

@munsonzzgf @sidthedollface2

[unattainablesongs]

i need to write a little steddie thing and im feeling in the mood for a bit of sleepy morning kisses + one of them is sick.

Eddie's sick and they're cuddling in bed with some shared kisses, just two cutie pies being cuties with each other <3

when Eddie is sick, he can get a bit needy, but that's only because he had a target to be needy to now - sweet, handsome, darling boy Steve Harrington.

they're both at the Munson trailer and it's well into the afternoon, the sun is slowly setting and its rays hit the warmth just right through Eddie's bedroom window.

the golden ray lights Steve's hair in such a way that makes Eddie's soul etch lyrics and poems, harkening Steve's beauty, into his heart. if only Eddie isn't coughing up one of his lung, then he can show Steve which of his freckle Eddie would kiss those sweet nothings into.

sick as Eddie is though, he's managed to find some energy and roll over on his bed to pepper kisses into Steve's neck.

"Eddie...? you're up?" Steve says and proceeds to stretch, pushing the entirety of his body into Eddie's side.

Eddie takes the opportunity to wrap his arms around Steve and nuzzles into his middle, smelling the wonderful maleness of his boyfriend.

"Yeah, but i'm still feeling a bit..." Eddie doesn't finish his sentence and hacks out a cough, moving away from Steve as to not get his grossness on the other man.

Eddie finishes and whimpers when he rolls back over to hug Steve, nuzzling his face even deeper into Steve's chest.

"still feelin' a bit tired, sorry baby."

Steve smiles softly. he moves away from Eddie a bit just to sit up straighter on the bed, then returns Eddie's arms from where they were hugging him on his waist. Eddie gets himself comfortable again on Steve's body, letting his warmth radiate off his body and onto Steve.

his boyfriend wraps his arms around Eddie's head and back, as he slowly starts to pet his hair and rub and scratch his back.

"nothing to be sorry about. people get sick all the time." Steve whispers as he scratches down Eddie's back with his blunt nails and he can hear Eddie almost purring into his body.

"how'd i get so lucky?" Eddie says, voice a bit breathy, yet hoarse. "i feel so gross, but you're still giving me hugs and shit."

"let's not count ourselves short here, we've been through grosser shit," Steve says and laughs, snuggling even closer to Eddie, "besides, you're super cozy right now and it's really doing something to me."

"ugh, Harrington, i'm sick." Eddie says, fake disgust laces with love in his tone.

"and so comfortable." Steve exclaims before diving down to kiss Eddie on his fever-heated lips, uncaring of the illness passing between them. worse things have happened, who cares if a little sick-riddened kiss gets exchanged every now and then.

Eddie lets out a soft moan as Steve slips his tongue further into the warmth and licks his boyfriend's pliant lips and pillowy tongue. Steve pushes Eddie down under the covers, lips still attached, and wraps his arms around Eddie's waist, getting even closer to the other man's body.

Steve lets go of Eddie's lips, but not without leaving a couple more stray kisses around his mouth and his nose and his eyelids and his forehead. Eddie whimpers and sighs.

"it's so warm in here..." Eddie whispers and little sighs and moans slips out of him as Steve coils himself even tighter around his body, welcoming the pressure.

"let's go back to sleep..." Steve yawns and lays his head down on Eddie's chest.

"mmkay." Eddie sighs one last time before he hears Steve's soft breaths lulling him to sleep.

[2btheanswertothequestion]

Tagged by @stevethehairington 🖤

RULES:

Post up to five (5) filenames of your WIPs; not titles, file names.

Post a snippet from one of them. Snippet must be words you wrote in the last 7 days. We’re posting progress here. If you haven’t made any, go make some and come back to post.

After you’ve posted, people can send you an ask with one of your file names. You must then write 3 sentences in that file.

That’s it! You can invite others to join in or just post.

WIPS:

High school reunion

Breathless (Buckingham, Steddie)

(medieval?) outlaws

Cheating Douchebag notfic

fleabag_ask_steddie_angst

SNIPPET:

High school reunion (long, but this is the entire last bit I wrote for it)

Chrissy jerked upright.

"Oh my gosh," she said, wide eyes trained on something behind Eddie and Jeff.

They turned just in time to see Steve Harrington walk in, fashionably late, with a beautiful woman on his arm.

Contrasting the majority of their once-popular peers, Steve wasn't looking washed up or miserable – he looked as amazing as he had in his youth. That fact filled Eddie with as much ire as it did relief. Like most of the men, Steve was wearing informal attire, but he wore it better, the silver suit and indigo shirt fitting his body so well they had to be bespoke. The way he carried himself had evolved from obnoxious cocksureness to poised and mature confidence. And, of course, the hair.

It was shameful, but Eddie stared. Fortunately, he wasn't the only one – everyone stole at least a glance of their former ruler. Yes, even ten years later, King Steve was the center of the room. He seemed to barely notice it, too preoccupied by his companion. She was almost as tall as he, and the cut of her emerald jumpsuit elongated her legs while her pixie cut displayed an elegant neck. They resembled a pair of super models.

"What's he doing here?" Jeff murmured. "He didn't graduate with us."

"I think his… wife? I think she did," Chrissy said. "I recognize her."

"She's the girl he drove to school every day the year after he graduated," Eddie said.

Chrissy gasped.

"That's right!" she hissed excitedly, thankfully not questioning why the fuck Eddie knew that (he still cringed at himself). "She was in band? What was her name… Roxy? Roslyn?" She frowned and shook her head. "Anyway, everyone was gossiping about them."

"Everyone?"

Chrissy awarded him the kindest eyeroll of his life. "Everyone in my circle. No one knew what their deal was – they seemed close, but he dated other people and she didn't date at all. It started after he and Nancy broke up, and… I guess she was waiting for him to notice her like that." Her gaze followed them as they made their way forth, making pleasantries with the brave souls who dared to approach them. "Seems like she got him in the end."

Chrissy sighed dreamily, like it was the height of romance. Eddie was inclined to agree. After being dumped and nearly dethroned, the most handsome boy in town befriended this ugly duckling who helped nurse his wounds and his heart. Staying by his side, a loyal friend even when he courted others. Quietly hoping he would open his eyes to what was in front of him all along. And at last, her patience was rewarded, and he realized it was her he wanted.

A clichéd, juvenile, teenage dream. A fucking fairytale. But a romantic one.

"They're a good fit, aren't they?" Chrissy mused.

"You think?" Jeff said.

"Yeah. He's always been gorgeous and she's stunning." She rested her chin on her palm, drifting away with a smile. "She looks kinda tough. I bet they're a total power couple."

"No Pressure" tag list: @spinmewriteround, @madaboutmunson, @metalhoops, @loveinhawkins, @anything-thats-rock-and-roll

[luvbuggyyy]

hey there! I’m bug, she/they, 18+ and I’m knee-deep in steddie! I made this blog in case anyone wanted to screech at me about my fics, but also just to have a space dedicated to my current hyperfixation! I’ll update this lil pinned with my current works and my WIPs as they change :)

uhhh I don’t have a DNI or anything but just. Be kind to me and each other. That’s pretty much it.

Disclaimer (which is also posted on all of my fics lol): I haven’t actually seen a lick of stranger things (yet). I’m insane. Sometimes my writer brain and neurodivergence fuse and let me understand 70-85% of a character without even glancing at their source material. I just know actually watching the show will make me worse. I do intend to watch it, but I’m trying to get the hyperfixation to calm down a little before I even attempt it. Regardless, if you give my fics a chance, I hope you enjoy them! I have fun writing them. Check em out below! 

Last updated: 12/16/22

ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luvbuggy/pseuds/luvbuggy

In Progress

girl, put your records on - currently two chapters, 11k+

“Off the Record,” Eddie groans, slapping his hand to his face. “If that’s not the cheesiest shit I’ve ever seen—“

“I know, but you’re gonna love the employee discount.” She pulls on his arm until he stumbles after her.

They peruse the store for a bit. They’ve got Wham playing on the overhead speakers and while Eddie does manage not to vomit, he doesn’t bother suppressing a giant eyeroll.

He’s gonna be a snob if he works here. He knows it. He’s right to be a snob. Music is for everyone in theory, but it’s supposed to have meaning and soul, not just a catchy chorus or synth or whatever the fuck. It’s supposed to have a message. People don’t get that anymore. What’s the point of music if it doesn’t rock you to your core? A good song changes the world. Music is the universal human connector.

But, here’s the thing. He has a heart. And Chrissy’s beaming at him with wide, sparkling eyes, an ABBA record in her hands, and his heart tells him to do whatever the fuck she wants. Even if it means choking back his snob-hood. Normal!AU where Eddie would follow his best friend anywhere, including into hell--AKA Starcourt.

in the dead of night (love bites, love bites) - 3/8 chapters, 29k+

Steve bolts upright as his breathing kicks into high gear. His hand finds his bat’s handle and within seconds he’s creeping further into the house. Everything is still dark and empty, just as he left it. He creaks down the stairs.

Thud. Thud.

The front door.

He gives the bat a quick spin, warming up his wrists. No way it’s Robin or any of the kids, they would’ve called or been yelling for him by now. There’s nothing outside but silence and the dull impacts, like something heavy’s relentlessly colliding with the door.

He tiptoes down the stairs. The door shakes in its frame. He gingerly undoes the latch, takes a few quick breaths, and throws the door open, raising his bat to swing.

Standing in the doorway is a creature that looks frighteningly like Eddie Munson.

WIPs/ideas bouncing in my brain like the windows screensaver

- future fruity four (ronance + steddie) where they get married to beard for each other. exploring what it means to build a home with and for the ones you love. normal au romcom vibes + background drumcheer - in progress

- first kill au (i’m insane for this one truly). not a one to one au but more the vibes of their universe. undercover legacy vamp eddie falls head over heels for monster hunter steve, sworn into the guild by adoptive dad and hunter Hopper. background ronance ft werewolf robin. modern au. - still cooking

- peter pan pirate au (sighs loudly). Prince Steven’s shitty little life turns upside down thanks to a mischievous, handsome Devil of a pirate and his band of scrappy thieves. ft ronance - in progress

[aratinatophat]

I posted 4,403 times in 2022

That's 4,155 more posts than 2021!

208 posts created (5%)

4,195 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@transs3xualmagg0t

@ukulelekatie

@lobster-child

@xxriotgrrrlb0yxx

I tagged 849 of my posts in 2022

#tophat talks - 40 posts

#mecore - 22 posts

#art - 17 posts

#myart - 17 posts

#bowuigi - 14 posts

#blorbo - 13 posts

#digtal art - 13 posts

#artists on tumblr - 12 posts

#prev tags - 10 posts

#oc - 9 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#anyways i’m going to stop because i am imagining myself as a drunken guy you’d probably meet in a pub somewhere just rambling about whatever

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Hey tumbleeesss how you tumbling, it’s time for your randomly dished out dose of my silly little art!

Ok so, this time I did a little bit of a challenge, I saw this on Drawfee. I’m sure you know who they are but if you don’t they’re this art challenge channel with great, lovely personalities they all seem really cool and not to brag but Jacob once liked my art on Twitter, I know, I know, I’m so cool but anyways.

The main gist of this challenge is:

You roll your music playlist, the first song is one character. You roll it again and the second song is a second character. AND THEN, THE 3RD SONG IS THEIR RELATIONSHIP. This can be platonic, romantic, indifferent etc etc but it’s so fun!

So this is what I rolled:

1: Clown by Updog

2: The Fall by Lovejoy

3: Tranz by Gorillaz

I had to figure out what all of these very different songs meant, how to turn them into characters, and how those characters/relationship look/feel like.

Clown is about this guy calling out this other obviously pretentious guy. So I started to think, who would call someone out no matter what, who would know so much about someone to be able to do that. Maybe a childhood friend? But that doesn’t give me a lot to work with. I’d watched a Monster Camp playthrough recently, the guy in it romanced the death reaper, so THAT got me thinking. I ended up settling on this clown (get it? Like the song name) demon who takes souls to the afterlife via travelling through their whole lives with them.

There’s the character designnnnn I love it it’s so cute yet menacing, NOW ONWARD TO THE FALL.

The fall was a bit more easier as I’d started to imagine it as a character before. It mainly helped with the colours but it also helped with the current falls “origins”. Tw for abuse for this next section, I’ll put it in red and make it small so you can skip it. So my idea for the fall was an abused person going on a roadtrip to nostalgic places as a break from their current toxic relationship. The nostalgic road trip backfires though and just reignites disgusted and angry feelings towards their parents due to y’know the abuse. So it’s safe to say the fall’s a very unlucky human being, THEY DESERVE BETTER. In my mind the song’s from their point of view addressing to herself as “we” sometimes to give her a better more authoritative and decisive look on things when it is necessary to her well-being. I made them look like this!

See the full post

12 notes - Posted May 25, 2022

#4

My family is officially a Steddie household. My brother is watching Steddie tiktoks. I’m drawing Steddie fanart (keep an eye out for that). We’ve been taken over by Steddie

25 notes - Posted July 13, 2022

#3

What if part of Mumbo jumbo became apart of the rift? The mumbo moustache was consumed and the Jumbo was taken over the process of a month. And because of this the rift protects Grian because friendship and this is why mumbo decided to build so close to the rift? But hey thya’s just a theory, a me theory

47 notes - Posted May 6, 2022

#2

Maya Hawke is the queen of codependent friendships, first Robin and Steve now Eleanor and Drea. In this video essay I wi-

61 notes - Posted September 21, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Oliver.png

Gnarly man (ignore the fucked up hand)

120 notes - Posted May 15, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[voidpacifist]

strap in, assholes, I've thought of another Deaf Steve AU for your consideration

(ps the steddie on this one is very brief, I haven't thought that part out too thoroughly just yet)

this takes place in like, early to mid 2000s

so in this universe, there's no catastrophe, no major physical traumas, no sickness, etc. steve is simply born without his hearing

his parents are not only rich, but are also super super concerned with appearances and because they're negligent assholes about it, they get steve fitted for hearing aids as soon as he's old enough to realistically begin talking

the hearing aids really don't do much for him, but the harringtons don't wanna worry about more surgeries or medical stays or being held back from their business trips/work holidays. you catch my drift. they forego the cochlear avenue but still hold out hope that steve will be "normal enough" with the "help" of a pair of hearing aids

and because the hearing aids only give him back so much, his oral language skills develop differently and at a much slower pace. it's not that he doesn't have the intellectual capacity — he absolutely does, the setting he's in just doesn't accommodate his needs

I imagine by the age of three or four, a nanny starts staying with him during the long weeks that his parents are gone. I also imagine that one of these nannies knows Sign and sees steve drifting without any communication that's suited to him, so they take it upon themselves to teach him

this goes on for years until one day, there's a phone call or an in person message or something that indicates that mr and mrs harrington have been in a traveling accident. this leaves steve parentless

he's immediately put into foster care, and from there, things go downhill. he gets into fights at school, becomes distant at each new place he stays at, and continues to isolate himself. he develops a very stubbornly independent approach to things, teaching himself to sign, speaking up for himself even if he can't hear how alien he sounds to the other students or adults at school

he keeps going from home to home until he lands at the home of tim and marissa buckley. marissa teaches a special ed class at a local middle school, and tim is a general contractor. they have three kids — a girl named robin, who's a year younger than steve, and twins dexter and benjamin

and steve is shocked by the patience of the parents, and also shocked by the fact that mrs buckley seems keen on connecting with him. the rest of the family is also learning Sign, but steve latches onto marissa the quickest because she reminds him of his nanny

tim ends up being the one who takes steve to most of his audiology appointments, or just other places he needs to be, and though tim doesn't know as much Sign as his wife, he still tries to cue steve in on conversations. just small talk about school or what steve likes to do or just "boyish" banter

dex and ben don't interact with steve much outside of bugging him to play like,,fucking kickball in the backyard, but they still form a tentative bond

robin is the hardest nut of the bunch to crack, and steves not too determined about actually becoming friends with her. in fact, most of the time, he's just waiting for the other shoe to drop with these people so he can be spat out again to the next family until he's kicked out of the system for good

even when he's getting his act together, he's still just waiting for it to happen. soon like four months have gone by and there's still no sign of the buckleys kicking him out or announcing that another family would be "better equipped" for him

here's a fun fact though: middle school kids are really fucking mean. and robins one of the only openly gay people in her grade. steves heard rumors that she's been bullied, but then he sees it happening in real time and he just. is seeing absolute red about it

he seeks out the fucker who graffiti'd her locker and lo and behold, gets into another fight at school

he's so Sure that this is the breaking point, but after his suspension is declared, marissa and tim sit him down not to scold him, but to wrap his knuckles and tell him how proud they are that he stood up for robin

and speaking of robin, steve's cool status with her just tripled easily. they start to become so close that at school, gossip starts that they're an item. one day someone flat out asks and robin, while signing, just says, "oh no! he's actually my big brother."

(if steve cries about that later by himself, that's his business)

there's still one dilemma steve has yet to get over though, and that's passing eighth grade. the constant moving and fighting has finally caught up to him, and he's forced to sign up for peer tutoring

this whipsmart, firecracker of a seventh grader, nancy wheeler, not only agrees to learn Sign, but also to help steve pass his classes

he's so fucking in love with nancy its not even funny. but the more they hang out, the less he wants to be with her and the more he wants to just be friends with her. plus, he doesn't miss the way robin ogles nancy when she thinks neither of them will notice

may/june rolls around and steve ends up with solid Bs in most, if not all, of his classes. he's on track to staying on track and the buckleys are ecstatic about it. marissa and tim find a cake at the grocery and have it say, "congratulations steve!" on it in big, loopy writing. they sign it to him as soon as he gets home from his last day of school for the year

after the weekend comes and goes and the celebration dies down, the two sit steve down and his initial thoughts are, "oh shit, my stay here is over." which majorly sucks, because the buckleys are the first family he's stayed with in a while that he's actually enjoyed staying with and getting to know

he's bonded with robin. he's bonded with ben and dex. he thinks maybe the same about marissa and tim. and he really really really doesn't wanna lose that. because not only has he come to think of them in a sort of pseudo-family sense, but they also have done and continue to do so much to accommodate steve and try to help him thrive and have resources as a young, deaf kid

so you can imagine how elated he is and how surreal it feels when they ask him flat out how he'd feel about being steve buckley. about officially being their son

years go by, until steve is in his senior year. he and robin have frequented several jobs together already, and this is the first year they've let go of their overprotective sibling instincts with one another and have gone to separate venues of work

steve ends up working part time at the library, while robin ends up at the video store

and one of steve's classmates from school (who he's 99% sure is redoing senior year) comes in pretty often. they don't talk at first, but every night, steve comes home and vents to robin about this really pretty classmate of his who plays in a thrash metal band and has far too many overdue fees

(and, if we're considering the library au, maybe steve pays off those fees and eddie ends up asking him out)

((like, he takes the time to learn as much basic Sign as he can within like a week of time, and the pulls steve aside after the library closes for the evening and just flat out asks))

robin is cautiously optimistic about this new guy that steve has a thing for, but she also knows eddie from drama club, so she not only has a good radar for the kind of person he is, but also knows exactly where to find him if he fucks things up with her big brother

cause listen — steves not immune to having experienced not-so-good encounters with a hearing partner. she's seen the way he or his deafness have been treated like a burden or a commodity, and she's very much hoping that's not the case with eddie

spoiler alert: eddie's very visibly autistic, so he knows what it's like to have been treated in a similar fashion. he has no plans to be that kind of an asshat to steve (and he very much is not)

but yeah long story short, give me deaf steve with a healthy sense of family and a willingness to be cared for thank you and goodbye