#just another disabled person renting

[yeeiguess]

Sometimes the thing that helps is actually physical exercise and that fucking sucks. How is my body able to make my lungs breath and my heart beats all right but I don't naturally have enough core strength to stay upright for ten minutes ?

[reflectionsofgalaxies]

.

[natalieleif]

Seeing a steady rise of people using the library as we carry through summer break, so here's a quick thread from a staff member on little things you can do (for free!) to make life easier on staff. Let's go!

If you want to put a book back, DON'T put it back on the shelf! Put it on the return cart or bin, or give it to a staff member. Not only does this make it MUCH easier to catch misfiles and gather abandoned books in one trip, our budget is literally based on returns. Putting it on a cart gives us more money!

(To expand on the above: not only do we get paid more based on more returns, our book-buying budget for next year is based on what titles seem popular. Even if you don't check out a stack of books, putting it on the cart lets us know there's an interest so we can order more in that genre and support that author.)

Conversely, if you see a cart already full of books being pushed around by staff, PLEASE don't yank books off it or loiter around it. Carts are unwieldy and returns can build up quick, so let a shelver have space to move around and do their job.

(Again expanding on the above, especially please don't yank books off a staff person's cart if you see them pulling books off the shelf instead of putting them back. Books are pulled for a reason--hold requests for another patron, damaged, need to be relabeled, etc--so taking one can really throw off our list.)

If you rent a DVD and notice it's scratched or doesn't play, please tell us! We don't have the time or resources to watch every returned DVD, so we rely on patron feedback. Even a note tucked inside the case helps it get flagged for damage inspection when we're processing returns.

Pay attention to news related to your local branch! The VAST majority of book-banning demands we get are bulk lists from only one or two people--which means contesting them (or requesting a challenged book) also only takes one person.

Remind your friends that most libraries don't do late fees anymore! We want to be a safe haven for low income and disabled/nd people, so don't let being late or disorganized or poor or anything else discourage you. Bring your books back whenever you can, or just mention to a librarian if you lose it, and you're always welcome to come back.

[princessmyriad]

So of course on the day of the first job interview ive had in three years i have a pain flare up and cant fucking walk, cant even stand for long enough to shower.

I feel like a failure, i feel like ive let everyone around me down even though logically i know this isnt something i chose or have control over. But my dad who helped me pick my outfit and my partner who gave me bus money to get there and myself who ripped my pinky nail in half so my silly halloween falsies werent seen as unprofessional or hinder any typing tests i might have to do. It all feels for nothing, it feels like ive asked everyone to put so much effort into helping me prepare for this thing and ive just squandered the opportunity and wasted their time 😔

Ive left a voicemail to explain, i hope they hear it and allow me to reschedule. I owe more in bills than i can afford to pay back, i really needed this to go well

[lakeinstillness]

I think Im not afraid of being a full time or most-time chair user, but its the lack of accessibility and loss of options that is scary. I think I can make peace with the idea that I might need a chair much more often than I do now, but even now I still struggle getting into certain buildings and just shopping in general when in my chair.

[yeeowch]

pls pls pls help a crippled trans woman eat this month

hey everybody sorry to do this again but my job is discriminating against me pretty bad both for being trans and for being disabled. they frequently let me know they do not like me and to make it hurt more they cut me down to 16 hours a week. i just lost a roommate too and my rent is now up to 850. im rly running out of options here. i feel so scared that i wont be able to eat this month. im begging yall for some help here until i can find another job but rn this is my only option. finding work that an able bodied person could do is hard enough, but the pickings for someone with a cane are very very slim.

pypl: anafenza

vnmo: glassspitter

if i could get at least 600 to pay for bart + insurance + groceries i would be eternally grateful i know its a lot but me and my partner would rly appreciate the help

[halflife2dotnet]

can you help me with the funds to get out of this house or at least get a car and the necessary classes to use it so i can go to work and escape if i need to? If you can please read ahead.

it is time sensitive, but i don't know how much time i even have.

i'm living in america as a disabled chronically ill transmasc thing in my mid 20's and i am choosing not to publically disclose any of my names. ive been living with an abusive family my entire life and it's getting worse. that really doesn't even begin to encapsulate what is going on lately. over the past several months i have attempted to overdose several times.

i'm coming home to violence and the impending threat of homelessness while trying to hold down a job my body can barely handle and while suspecting that i have frontal lobe epilepsy after having a really fucked up episode of seizures earlier this year that are still affecting me, it is not tenable. i don't feel comfortable going much further into details other than saying: i am watching one of my parents dying (possibly from cancer) and becoming more volatile & abusive.

death is in my future no matter how far i get away from here and i'm coming to accept it. i can't accept not having any autonomy in the face of death.

i really shouldn't drive but i have no choice. i need to at least be able to carry myself where i need to go, alone, without people who just use me in one way or another. i can no longer bank anything on the person who drives me to work being alive in a few months time either.

my job is not pulling in enough money to help me get a vehicle while also paying for rent and evrything else. i have set a goal at 8,500 USD.

i urge you to please reblog this, send it to whoever you want. if 500 people each sent in just 20 dollars that would put me beyond my goal. even if you can only do 5 or 10, it always matters. 🤍

[thelordfool]

HELP ME PLEASE!!!!!

Long story short: I'm unemployed and will not, unlike what I originally thought, qualify for unemployment benefits.

Please read the readmore for additional context on why I'm unemployed. This post is basically a continuation/update/redo of this post. I'm suffering a sickness with no medicine the past week, applied for almost 100 jobs the last two weeks, am disabled/queer/nonbinary/tired of ebegging. I'm also in the negatives in my bank account because my car payment came out, so I need to get that covered.

pp/vm/ca

$250/$1151.51

i need at least $511.51 of this by the first. please spread if you're financially unable to help, every person this reaches helps! here's the breakdown of the costs: $640 - car payment + late fees $380 - rent $131.51 - negative amount in bank currently

Oh hey thanks for stopping by to read this annoying tale of woe and being angry at capitalism. Prepare for wall of text.

I once had two jobs. The first job, at a chain restaurant, was a bit of a clique-y experience where I was working my damndest to be the best bartender they ever had. I still have all the cocktails memorized. However, I continually faced discrimination in the form of severe misgendering, no matter how often I corrected them. I was also set up for failure. Usually, when someone gets hired for a position, there's some amount of training to be done, no matter how experienced they are, right? I was going in nearly entirely inexperienced into the role. I knew how to make cocktails, sure, and was and still am very good with people and selling. But I was trained for two days. Two. Then, on my first night alone (a Friday), I was watched by one of the bigwigs at corporate who saw every little flub and failure. This caused a demotion-ish. I was demoted to barback but was allowed the same privileges. Until their next visit. That upset the hell out of me - I was well trained by that point and could do it all, with one hand tied behind my back. I digress. It was about 2 months following my demotion when i finally walked out. A new bartender had been hired and she thought I was being a total creep by looking at a ticket that had just come in. She stormed off to report me to the manager who, even after hearing my side where I had asked her if there was anything on the ticket that I could grab, said that I "needed to communicate better," and "you should be learning from her," and "you're a grown man, you should know better." I don't think I need to explain why that was so upsetting.

But I didn't report them, because I just wanted to be done with it. I was also working another bartending job, and everythign was literally perfect other than the hours, honestly. I loved the product the distillery made, I loved the people I worked with, and most of all: I had my own regulars. Last month, they hired a new hospitality director, who announced there would be some restructuring, including getting rid of servers while also making a full dinner menu to serve alongside drinks. I said nothing of it, despite my disagreements, and she assured us all that no one would lose their jobs, but just moved into different roles. We all kinda grumbled about it, and I told her that under no circumstances would I work back of house. Easy peasy. Till it wasn't, and I came home to a voicemail while on break with my partner that I'd been let go due to the restructuring. So much for no one losing their jobs, right? I hadn't been the only victim of this. I have my suspicions as to why the new hospitality director did these things, but I've no energy to throw around conspiracies. All I know is that I was shafted by both of these places and I'm tired of being broke. I'm applying, still going to fight, and... sigh.

tl;dr (why did you click the readmore?): i left a job due to discrimination and lost another due to company restructuring and i'm tired and sad and aaaaa.

[cy-cyborg]

It will never not be frustrating to me that amputees appear in fiction ALL. THE. TIME. and yet they're almost never acknowledged as such. The Cyberpunk genre is especially guilty of this: amputees and prosthetics becoming a normalised part of life are a defining part of the genre/aesthetic and yet no one even consults with any amputees about how we get represented there. Most writers in those genres don't even consider that giving your characters cybernetic arms and legs means they're an amputee.

CW: Ableism, dehumanisation

This makes it REALLY uncomfortable to engage with stories in the genre because another common aspect of cyberpunk is the idea of losing yourself and becoming something distinctly not-human anymore because you have too many cybernetic augmentations/implants. Shadowrun even has mechanics for this, which state if you get too many prosthetics, which is what cybernetics are 9 times out of 10, your character becomes a monster. These mechanics and discussions surrounding "how many robot bits make you not human anymore" are really, really uncomfortable when you remember this isn't something that's unique to a far-off future setting. Those people you're discussing the humanity of already exist. They're called amputees. If you reframe the question as "how many amputations can you have before you stop being a person" I hope you can see why an amputee like myself is not going to feel safe around you or in your fandoms.

And it's a shame, because I REALLY want to like Cyberpunk. I really, honestly do. I love the aesthetics, I love the idea of big corporations being the villains and the anti-capitalism at the heart of the genre, and I love the idea of prosthetics being not only destigmatised, but desirable. When written from a disability-inclusive lense, it honestly has the potential to be an incredibly uplifting and empowering genre. but as the genre stands right now, it's actively hostile to the very folks who are usually the stars of its stories: amputees, all because people just refuse to acknowledge us.

Cyberpunk isn't the only genre guilty of this, it's common all throughout sci-fi as a whole, but Cyberpunk is the only one where it starts becoming a serious issue due to its rampant dehumanisation of a real group of people. In other sci-fi settings, it's just kind of annoying and while it can be a form of erasure, it's not usually harmful, just...frustrating. Fantasy does it on occasion too, think pirates with a hook and a peg leg, but nowhere near as much.

If you, as an author or creator, use any of these words to describe a character or their tech in a sci-fi setting:

cybernetics/cybernetic enhancements

bionics

robot limbs

cyborgs

augmentations

You are probably writing an amputee. Please, at the very least, acknowledge it, and be mindful that those are real people who actually exist, not just a fantasy group you can speculate about.

edit:

I originally posted this article on my old Tumblr account and lot of people commented/reblogged to tell me that originally in cyberpunk, the "less human the more robot bits you have" only applied to people who opted for their limbs to be replaced by cybernetics, because it was seen as "renting out your body to corporations for money" but people who had to get cybernetics out of necessity weren't impacted. The thing is though, I really don't think that makes it better, for a few reasons. For one, where do you draw the line at "opting" to get a cybernetic prosthetic? This isn't a black and white thing, even in real life. Most amputations are done out of necessity, but there are situations where it's not the only option, just the best one. Talking from personal experience, I lost both my legs below the knee as a baby, that was a pretty clear cut case, I had a blood infection and gangrene and they had to act fast. But the infection caused lasting side effects and impacted my physical body's development and growth. By the time I got to my early 20's it was causing a lot of pain in my right leg, in my knee specifically, and when I got a bone infection in the end of that stump, I chose to have the whole thing amputated up to the knee. They only needed to take a few inches off the end of my stump, but I asked them to go higher, because of the ongoing issues in that knee, issues that would have been made worse by the shortening of the leg. I choose to remove the whole thing, knowing the joint was degrading and I probably would have lost it later in life anyway. Even if it was salvageable, it would mean much more surgery, and I've had enough of those. A boy I played wheelchair basketball with was born with a partially formed leg, it was half the size of his other leg and he wasn't able to use it al all, it was just dead weight, so he opted to get it amputated too for convenience and so he could use a prosthetic on that side. I worked with a girl who's hand didn't form properly in the womb, resulting in a normal palm, but tiny "finger nubs" (her words) with no bones inside. They weren't actively harming her usually, but she opted to get them and the top of her palm amputated after an incident at work where we were tying balloons and one of her nubs got stuck in the knot. She decided to get them amputated because it meant accidents like that would be less likely, and she could use a prosthetic more comfortably. All 3 of these are considered "optional" amputations, so would people like us be penalised in your setting? does it make sense that the technology in your setting can tell the difference, or that corporations would care about the how and why? Even stepping away from medical grey areas, if your character opts for a cybernetic arm because the corporations will financially reward her, and she's struggling to put food on the table without that help, is that really optional?

Don't get me wrong, I do think that idea could work but it would take a lot of work to do well, and most works I've seen don't do the work. Even if they did though, it doesn't change the fact that most modern uses of this trope don't mention that bit or actively ignore it. It doesn't matter in most cyberpunk works I've seen if the amputation was optional or out of necessity, they still are more prone to being seen as "less human" and in most of the sci-fi writing communities I've been part of, the authors are genuinely shocked when I ask them to remember "people with cybernetics are real people already, they're not some far-off-distant future fantasy group, they're just called amputees". Like it didn't even cross their minds. These are the people creating the works in this genre. Even if it wasn't the original intention of the genre, it's still an issue in the modern version of it. Edit 2: Elaborated a little more on why I don't think the "only people who choose it" argument works in the edit. Also, please stop telling me that old cyberpunk doesn't have this issue, I literally address that in the post lol.

[zootycoons]

Hello!

It's Margie again. I need to make a more comprehensive post for this mess. So I'll start with the key points of why I need help blah blah blah.

😆 I have cancer and a total hysterectomy scheduled for October 17th becuz I have atrophy and decay. I also have a problem with a vein around my kidney instead of where it's supposed to be.

😂 My wife also broke her ankle and cannot go to work, walk, drive, or even go down the stairs for 4 to 12 weeks. We live on the second floor. We have to call EMT if she needs up and down the stairs.

🤣 I quit my job for incredibly personal reasons including the first point above and ✨retaliation✨ YIKES. I'm getting another job but that leaves at least a week and a half I didn't work and earn this month all becuz my body is dying and men with power should be eaten alive.

😀 I have two cats one of which is old and disabled so I don't just feed my family of four I feed them too. I have no food stamps left. Or money ATM. To feed my family of four.

😐 My electric is due by the 26th and my rent is due by the 5th. Which all together amounts to about $500. I'm gonna do everything I can to make money but it'd be such a relief to not have to be scared about housing and electric. So I honestly wouldn't shy away from dnations right now. Share if u can't thank u.

Pypal Kofi

[applesdotexe]

asking for help : the big ask

hey, it's me, apples, again. physically disabled person who has moved house twice in the last year due to unstable housing and having to blow my scraps of savings on moving to my current spot (a friends basement)

i am being redirected bills from my last rental -- i had to leave on a sour note, i had been covering rent and bills on my own for over half a year and i really got into the hole fiscally just to keep afloat. i cannot take care of this as i am facing another hour cut at my job (i work ten hours a week at most) and i already went deep into debt at my previous spot.

i cannot contact family for assistance, as i went no contact with my family when i initially moved away due to them urging me to live with and forgive my abuser. as such, i moved before i was fiscally in a place to do so and scrapped along for months as my family threatened me with anything they could if it would prevent me from talking about being abused

i really just want to get all this garbage taken care of so i can try starting over with a clean slate. im frustrated, im exhausted, i've spent the past many months asking for help cause it's all i can do at this point.

0 / 200

thank you for reading and boosting

[esggs]

College Major Headcanons:

[Extra content for Capital - noritoshi kamo x reader, cute college au]

Yuuji Itadori - Media Studies, on a full sports scholarship even though he's not too interested in sports. He doesn't show up to practice that much but carries the team in tournaments. Not really very academically inclined but everyone he meets loves him so much that he's gotten a shit ton of internships and work experience just cuz he's nice to work with. Stays on campus dorms.

Nobara Kugisaki - Fashion Merchandising (yay legally blonde). Another one who's not very academically inclined but does great at the practical aspects of the job. Gets 40% off on tuition, but has some funds from her grandma. also gets money from her fashion blog, part-time jobs at fashion mags, and manages clothing for photoshoots on a freelance basis (if she commits she commits). Saves on residence by renting with Inumaki and Panda.

Megumi Fushiguro - Computer Science with a minor in Math. Full scholarship and bursary grant by the college due to his shitty financial conditions (orphaned and destitute at a young age). Prof Gojo is his legal guardian. grew up in and stays on campus dorms.

Maki Zenin - Star Athlete, literally training for the Olympics. Her degree is in Mass Communications but she doesn't actually have to attend classes cuz the Uni wants her to focus on sports. Disowned by her family. Full sports scholarship and occasionally gets sponsored by sportswear companies. Trying to go pro.

Yuuta Okkotsu - Sociology and Anthropolgy. He enjoys talking to and meeting people and works as a part-time Journalist for local news channels to bring attention to issues like poverty. Gets a bursary grant from the uni, gets paid for and is decently recognized for his journalism work. Both Geto and Gojo want to mentor him. He talks to himself when he's alone but that's a secret.

Toge Inumaki - Architectural Design, chose this degree just for the hell of it, is a solid B+ student. Has a YouTube gaming and ASMR channel with 200k followers but is struggling to monetize it profitably. Got in on legacy admissions but gets a sports scholarship of 30% (he's pretty good at athletics)

Panda - ???

Noritoshi Kamo - Economics and Finance, specializing in Private Equity and Investment Banking. he's the heir of the Kamo Conglomerate. Full legacy admission even though he graduated valedictorian of high school and is the captain of the Archery team.

Todo Aoi - Quantum Physics. he's literally the top student of every class he takes. he keeps taking random other classes from different majors based on his whims. his genius was recognised and personally mentored by Yuki Tsukumo, but is now undergoing formal college education for the certificate even though he already knows all this and more. he spends half the day in the gym and the other half streaming Takada-chan variety clips.

Mai Zenin - Economics and Finance, her family made her take it. good at academics even though she's not super into it. legacy admission.

Momo Nishimiya - Literature and Creative Writing. She posts regularly for a gender and sexuality magazine. loves nobara's blog.

Miwa Kasumi - Computer Science with a minor in Software Engineering. She just wanted a degree that would lead to a well-paying job. Cabinet Member of the Student Council. She vouched a lot for Mechamaru/Kokichi to get disability-friendly accommodation. she struggles a bit with academics but pulls through with A- all around. Kokichi/Mechamaru helps her if she finds something particularly difficult to understand. has her own campus residence but has practically moved in with Kokichi.

Arata Nitta - Health and Medicine, focusing on Emergency Care Medicine. he TAs for Prof Shoko's classes. his sister works in college admin office. has campus residence but mostly stays in the college affilitated hospital, bit of an over-worker.

Mechamaru/ Kokichi Muta - double major in Computer Science and Mechanical Engineering. Another top student of his classes. Found it a bit difficult to adjust to campus life at first (not enough disability accommodation) but with Miwa's help he got around. campus dorm with Miwa.

Professors!

Gojo Satoru - graduated from top Ivy colleges, has 5 PhDs, and wrote 1000 papers and books, and is the one of the most respected physicist in the world but insists on teaching Intro-level Physics and Math. drives a Bugatti to college. highly competitive relative grading. prescribes his own books for his class. expect a problem set every day after class. gives a lot of individual attention to students tho, n is very nice in general. he'll accept a late submission if u bring him sweets. his lockscreen is prof geto?

Geto Suguru - teaches one class named Ethics, Philosophy and Law every semester. doesn't answer questions over email, only during Office Hours. great at explaining difficult concepts, his course is the one students fight to get into and say "opened their eyes". has a devoted cult of worshipping students, voted student favorite every year. his adopted daughters took a gap year to travel abroad and he talks about them in class. he always has sweets in his pockets?

Utahime Iori - teaches modules on Economics, Politics and Philosophy courses. great teacher, very clear explanations, bumps up the grading slightly (absolute grading) and is very accommodating as a prof. hates getting emails at night tho.

Shoko Ieiri - Shitty ass prof tbh but everyone takes her class cuz she gives everyone an A. teaches Surgical Anatomy. focuses on practical experience rather than theory. she has a no attendance policy and takes few very exams or assignments.

Yuki Tsukomo - Visiting Faculty, takes one super high level class Quantum Physical Theory one semester and comes back after 4 years. Independent researcher funded by the uni.

[lordelmelloi2]

we need help again...

I hate hate hate hate to make this post but we could really use some help. Mostly because I am uninsured until my job opens enrollment for its health insurance in June and on the eve of us signing the apartment lease tomorrow, I have contracted strep throat from my coworkers. Hooray!

I'm gonna try and get an appointment at the community health center doctor's tomorrow because I straight up don't have the money or time to go to the CVS minuteclinic across the street. They said it was $139 for a strep appointment without insurance, I said hell no... If I wait another day I can try and get a sliding scale $40 appt at the doctors. Right now is just stressful because we need money and because they didn't give us our security deposit back I'm not going to have enough money for my bills the beginning of the month. Plus there are literally THREE prescriptions I have asides from however much a Z pack will likely cost and one of them is an ointment from a compound pharmacy that I don't have money to pay for~!!!! 😭😭😭

Asides from that I am afraid that we miscalculated how much we have for rent for May so I'm trying to see about covering those costs so we aren't paying 3 days late into the month of May for our May rent first month. I really don't want to have a bad first impression with these people. They've been very kind to us so far with renting this new place but I don't want to push the limits.

I've already asked my dad for help but he wasn't able to spare enough for us to be totally covered + he needs me to pay him back by August. During the month of April I also applied to multiple credit unions for personal loans and got rejected...

So my total expenses are:

- Medication/Doctor's visit (including pre-existing prescriptions that I haven't had the money to pick up) ($160)

- Phone bill ($75 for this first month, should be going down next month as verizon charges my account with different coding)

- costs for rent/move (like hopefully $200 idk. I think we can swing the last hundred)

In addition: Because of my history of struggling with commissions due to my psychiatric disability, I don't really want to do this but if you donate a sum above $100 you can ask me to digitally paint something for you. Please no complicated requests or anything since I've been struggling with art for years now from depression/anxiety etc. but I would feel indebted to you if I didn't do anything. If this is something you'd like please DM me/send me an ask off anon.

* As for why we have been so financially fucked this month. Our current apartment complex (yes the one with the leaks, roaches, harmful construction noises etc.) has kept our security deposit which has us out $300 that we could've used towards the new place. They have fucked us over one last time.

My paypal as always is at: paypal.me/roseod

And please share if you can. Every reblog/donation of even a small amount is appreciated. Thank you all so much for supporting me.

[beyondthisdarkhouse]

My mom comes over a couple of times a week to help me keep the apartment tidy and to body-double so I can focus on work.

"Mind if I open this?" she asked me this morning, holding up an envelope I'd tossed onto a pile of clutter the week before. I hadn't opened it because I already knew what it was—the decision of my appeal against being judged "medically ineligible" for permanent disability benefits, which are almost double what I get now and would cover rent and food. Absolutely everyone, from disabled advocacy groups to the legal aid lawyer who helped prep me for the hearing, told me that there was basically no chance I'd get deemed eligible on the first appeal. Normally it takes 2 or 3 application-appeal cycles (9-10 months each) for people to get into the program.

"Go ahead," I told her, and then turned back to other work. I've got a lot to do given how well my Kickstarter is doing, whether it's setting up the behemoth new printer I got off Kijiji for 10% of its original value, to scheduling work meetings with my newly-hired personal assistant. I've always got so much on my plate, and the number of hours in the day I can focus on it is countable on my hand that's missing fingers. And I'd love to get a sewing pattern out for my "just the sleeves, please" costume idea out in enough time for people to use it for Halloween, but I still need to make mock-ups and hire someone who's used to producing digital sewing patterns.

"I think," Mom said quietly, leafing through the letter, "that you won."

The letter ends like this:

Conclusion: The Panel finds that the Appellant meets the definition of "severe handicap" as is set out in the Regulation and therefore reverses the Director's decision.

Yeah. It means I won.

The benefits program will require another eight weeks to double-check my financial eligibility using information they already have, and to process my new program status to reflect an increased benefit rate and a different health insurance program.

Right now I'm really feeling this line from Komarr, by Lois McMaster Bujold: "But do you know--well, of course you could, but… the business with [throwing yourself at] the brick wall. Failure, failure was grown familiar to me. Comfortable, almost, when I stopped struggling against it. I did not know achievement was so devastating."

It felt like my whole life ended in a flaming wreck when I had to give up counselling. I lost part of who I was when I did that, and spent years telling myself I'd pull up my socks at any minute and go right back to it. But the truth is, I am not capable of doing that job as well as it needs to be done, and it's one of those jobs where you half-ass things at the peril of the vulnerable people who trust you.

And what if... the worst had happened, and I lost it all, and then in clawing my way out of the pit, trying to get purchase on absolutely any kind of survival I could, I found my way to something new and solid and real. What if it was okay after all?

I'm still having trouble believing it, but the letter keeps saying what it said.

I'm gonna go sew things, and see if it feels any more real in the morning.

[autistic-danvers]

Since my blog has become one long mutual aid request the last month or so, I thought I’d go into a little more detail about my situation this time around.

I lost my disability at the beginning of the year and am unable to work bc of chronic illness and a host of mental issues on top, so my wife and I have been relying on her income while I work with a lawyer and all my doctors to try and get it reinstated.

That alone was more than enough to knock us totally off stable ground but on top of it, also at the start of the year I had a family medical crisis that has caused me to have to come back to my hometown and take care of my father for at least the next 6 months and now, not only are we down to one income but we have bills in two separate states along with trying to be able to see each other every once in a while.

My wife’s family has been helping us where they can but they’re also not very well off, and on my side the only family I have is my father who cannot help in any meaningful way either.

I guess this is just one of those things where one disaster after another keeps hitting and I’m struggling to just keep my head above water. Almost 10 years on this site without ever engaging with calls for mutual aid and now I seem to need it constantly; as much as I know it shouldn’t, it feels very humiliating to keep begging for help from people but I’m at a loss for what else to do.

Rent is coming up soon along with trying to get groceries, my phone bill, and utilities taken care of, so I’m going to once again post my PayPal here and pin it to my page, along with my heartfelt gratitude to every person who has helped me recently even just by reblogging my posts. If you have even a couple dollars you could spare to help me reach my goal of $500 for the rest of march and april, you’d certainly be helping me survive.

446$ out of 500$ ❤️

[thornsinmycrown]

PROTECTION | HEADCANONS

YANDERE!Mike Schmidt x GN!BABYSITTER!READER

warnings: [ MDNI +18 ] kidnapping, yandere, obsessive, isolating, stalking behavior, mention of sexual themes. word count: 731

summary: he just wants his little sister's babysitter to be safe.

He totally has a "crush" on you, something innocent at first. It's undeniable to this point, Abby draws you with them and her friends, there's a big wall wrapped in her drawings like wallpaper, her big brother and yourself holding hands with cute little red hearts all around you.

He talks about you at dinner time, asking Abby how did you treat her and if you were nice for the day, he promised her that you will always stay with them, that he would find a way to make you stay forever.

You know he hasn't had an easy life, talking to you in confidence about Garrett and how he couldn't save him, the way he feels about failing his own family and you admire his compromise over Abby.

Sometimes he takes it to extremes, overprotecting her and doing what you and the little girl consider dismissing fun time.

At first it seemed to be something normal to you, she was the only of his family left, the constant reminder of how lonely and how lucky he was to still have a bond with his parents at the same time, but with time you grew tired of wiping Abby's tears that were actually cried over nothing.

The first time you two had the talk and spoke about it, he was in denial. Mike assured he wasn't controlling Abby's life, he was keeping her safe from the dangers of the world.

You try to remind him what is obvious, that she is a kid and kids need to play and make friends, have fun and enjoy childhood.

He immediately felt bad watching you yell at him to make him take in count the child's feelings, and that's when he realized how important you were — how much of his tiny family needed a mediator like you.

He resents —and admires— your humanity. He is aggressive, cunning, rough to any edge, and deep down he knows you are too, except you don't let that take away your compassion.

Mike yearns for every piece of you now, any kind of affection is well received, whether it is a simple greeting or a friendly waving hand, he even prepares himself to gently smile no matter how awkward it feels, your small confused nodding gesture gets him every time.

You don't judge his incapacity to retain any job and he feels maybe you're the only person in the world who actually understands his struggles — his failures.

When he starts working at Fazbear's he fears he could be loading you too much responsibility, working the night shift wasn't his ideal and, though you'd never let him down, he felt worried you two were going to be alone for so many hours.

The first three nights everything was alright, until the fourth happened.

Animatronics chasing down his little sister was the last straw, it made him snap inevitably, you and Abby weren't safe at all, any time you could be murdered by any of them and there wouldn't be a way to save you.

He fears losing you, what would he do without you?

You help him get rid of them for the little girl's sake, temporarily disabling the animatronics like Vanesa instructed, but you get hurt in the process.

The yellow bunny twists the knife inside you, you let him in order to protect Abby, and it doesn't cost you as much as it costs Mike.

The idea of your loss only fuels Mike's grief, it's like losing his family all over again, but this time will be different — this time he has the chance to change the ending.

You wake up in a hospital bed, your ribcage hurts and you have an injured leg, the first thing your eyes see are his, red puffy eyes full of pain.

A week passes so you can leave the hospital, and he has a room for you in the house.

You try to explain to him you have a place to live since you rent a shared room with another person, but he insists you're not safe there.

"What if he comes back and tries to hurt you again?" "What if this time he—?" He cannot even end the sentence, he can only imagine the worst.

You agree to stay for a couple of days while your injuries heal, yet the unsettling part is just about to begin for you.

Author's note: I had in mind this headcanons since the first time I saw the movie and once I left the theater I started working on them but just release them now because I couldn't finish them in a way I like until today. I'll do a second part to this just because I think it has more potential to add to his character.