#just got past coda

[theartingace]

so I saw one interesting comic about a podcast and accidentally have been binging it for nearly a week straight, it had me thinking of nothing else within 30 seconds of episode 1, Love this poor sad dishrag of a man and his poetry loving passenger <3

[aroeddiediaz]

7x04 Coda

Sprained ankles hurt. Eddie shouldn’t be as surprised as he is by the pain, because he knows all too well that the amount of pain injuries feel like is almost inverse with the actual damage they cause. A shot from a sniper felt like almost nothing, while a stubbed toe sends ricochets up his spine.

But that’s nothing compared to the encroaching feeling of dread as Eddie thinks back on his interactions with Buck over the last two weeks, and what might have caused his best friend to lash out at him.

“I think we fucked up,” he grumbles to Tommy, who gives him a quick glance before returning his attention to the road.

“You mean with Evan?” Tommy says.

Evan. That was kind of weird, right? Eddie had only ever heard Buck’s sister and parents call him by his first name before. He’d only used the name once himself, when he told Buck about his will.

But Buck hadn’t corrected Tommy on it, so he must not mind, Eddie supposes.

Eddie shakes that stray thought away.

“Yeah,” he continues, even though talking kind of hurts right now. That didn’t seem fair, it’s Eddie’s ankle that’s injured, not his lungs. “I mean, with me kind of blowing him off to come to that karaoke night… and the UFC fight in Vegas… and the pickup game…”

Looking back on it now, Eddie’s not sure when it all got so out of hand. He and Tommy had hit it off on the Coast Guard ride back to LA, while Buck was off checking in with Bobby and Athena. He’d been so excited as they shared their similar interests and history- army, MMA, old cars- that he’d immediately made plans to hang out. When Tommy mentioned that he could get them rinkside tickets in Vegas, Eddie had jumped on it immediately. He didn’t even think about mentioning it to Buck.

And the babysitting thing… Eddie kind of wants to curl up thinking back to the strange face Buck had made when Eddie asked him to watch over Chris. Buck usually loved hanging out with Chris, even volunteering for it when Eddie mentioned having plans, so he didn’t think twice about asking it of him. He should have known.

“Ooh, yeah.” Tommy lets out a whistle. “We did fuck up, huh. Could have at least invited him to muay thai after the match.”

Eddie laughs a little, strained by the pain and the stirrings of shame. “Buck doesn’t know muay thai. Just boxing.”

“Yeah?” There’s a funny tone to Tommy’s voice. “Maybe we should teach him.”

Eddie does a careful rotation of his inflamed joint. The stretch does help ease the pain a little. “Maybe you should offer him lessons,” he says. “I’m gonna be out of commission for a little bit.”

Tommy glances at him again. A slightly longer one, with them stopped at a red light, kind of searching. “You think he’d be interested in learning from me?”

“Oh yeah. You’re great. And Buck’s a quick study for sure.” Eddie glances out the window, and sees the urgent care clinic sign just past the intersection. “Actually, you think you could do me a favor?”

The light turns green. Tommy drives forward. “Of course.”

“Could you talk to Buck for me?” Eddie asks. “I’m sure he’s feeling all sorts of guilty right now, and it’s not his fault. He just got a little too aggressive at the game.”

It’s really too bad. Buck’s really good at basketball, for someone who hates the game so much. Eddie’s sure he’ll never get Buck to touch a ball again.

“Uh, yeah,” Tommy says, slowly, as he pulls up into the parking lot. “If you’re sure you want me to speak with him.”

Eddie nods. “He’s probably licking his wounds at his loft right now, and he’ll need a bit of a kick in the pants before he comes to see me. I trust you.”

Tommy chuckles a little. “Alright, then. I’ll swing by his place in the morning, before my shift, check in on him for you.”

That’s a relief. They find a parking spot close to the clinic entrance, and Eddie hisses a little as he opens the door and swings his legs out. He needs to be more considerate of Buck’s feelings, going forward. He has the sinking feeling that he’s started to take him for granted.

He’ll have to pay him more attention.

[wildlife4life]

Fuck-It Friday Coda

Tagged by the amazing @hippolotamus @jesuisici33 @wikiangela and @tizniz (who dropped a whole new fic!) Thank you so much! Hope you all are just as hyped for bi-buck as I am!!!!!!! Not much to say than what's being said everywhere for 7x04. Here is my coda this historic episode and it can be read on ao3 as well. Enjoy!

It’s never really a surprise anymore whenever Buck runs into Tommy at the 118’s favorite hook and ladder bar. Hell, before they broke up, Tommy took him to this bar on a couple dates. Awkward dates but dates all the same.

Buck is waiting for the latest rounds of drinks at the bar when a familiar hand lands on his shoulder, “Hey Evan.”

He whirls around and comes face to face with the very man that opened Buck up to whole new world. “H-h-hey Tommy.” He greets nervously, gaze flickering over to where his team, Maddie, Athena, and some friends from dispatch sat.

Tommy catches it and smirks, “Here with the entire crew huh? What’s the cause for this meet up? Didn’t see or hear about any big Buckley heroics over the radio waves.”

Buck finally catches Eddie attention, and his partner stiffens slightly at the sight of Tommy. They were all still friends, mostly, but after the pilot ended things with Buck, sides were taken… in more ways than one.

“You lied back then. In your loft, before I kissed you.” Tommy stated, staring out the hanger doors, hands shoved deep into his flight suit’s pockets.

Wretchedness gripped Buck’s throat tightly. He knew where this was headed, and for just the briefest moment he wanted to fight it. Fight for what he and Tommy had. “I didn’t lie. I wanted to get to know you, I thought-I still think you are cool, and I just wanted you see that.” His voice was high and tight with the brittle lie.

Tommy shook his head and Buck caught his grimacing smile, “Buck you need to stop lying to yourself and open your damn eyes. I have and you want to know what I saw?” His voice cracked with anguish.

Buck’s lower lip trembled, and he could feel the prickle of tears. He didn’t want to know. He didn’t want to face it. Because if he opened his eyes to what Tommy is seeing, the despair would be 10 times worse than what he’s facing at the time.

Always the bravest of two of them, Tommy scoffed at Buck’s silence and pushed on, “You weren’t vying for my attention. You never have. Evan you never did any sort of chasing in this relationship, I did. I so was blinded by how endearing and open you were about your best friend, that I failed to see you misplacing you’re confused emotions onto the nearest person showing you affection. Me.”

The tears began to flow when Buck shook his head, “No Tommy. I liked you; I just didn’t know about that part of myself until you showed it to me.”  He tried defending.

His boyfriend snorted, “Liked. Past. Not present.”

And Buck’s heart dropped into his gut.

Finally, Tommy looked at him and everything in his stomach becomes rancid at the utter heartbreak on the older man’s face, “I’m glad I could help you embrace your bisexuality. Truly I am. I know how freeing it can be.  But Evan, those feelings you’ve have for men, for that one special man have always been there and instead of facing them, you took the easy way out with me. And fuck man, it hurts. It really does.”

“Tommy…” Buck started, but Tommy’s hand gripping his wrist silenced him.

“Evan-Buck. Its-well it’s not entirely okay, but you didn’t know or see and neither did I. At least not until you came back from Chim’s bachelor party. You two couldn’t even look each other in the eye and you’ve been off since.”

That’s because he and Eddie got into the biggest fight of their lives during Chimney’s bachelor weekend.  Because Eddie had been acting off since Buck came out, even though he promised nothing would change. Because Buck once again became enviously green when Eddie kept his attention on the private bar tender. Because Eddie looked Buck in the eye and asked, ‘Why does he get that part of you?’ in the middle of their screaming match that Buck still has no idea how it started but ended there. Because they both walked away, too scared to confront any of those feelings. Because Buck knew deep down, he wanted to give everything he was giving to Tommy, to Eddie and so much more.

“You are such a wonderful man Buck and I know it was never your intention to hurt anyone. But us being together, it’s destroying me and you and...” Tommy sucked in a sharp breath, “And Eddie.”

And there it was. Everything that Buck has been denying since Tommy confronted him in his loft.  The person who was really behind Buck’s complex and confused emotions those few months ago. It was time Buck accepted it. It was time to open his eyes. It was time to let Tommy go.

Buck let out a sob and tugged Tommy into a tight embrace, “I’m sorry, I really am.”

Tommy sniffled, “You have nothing to apologize for Evan.” He pulled back and put Buck at arm’s length, giving him a wet smile, “I was more than honored to be your queer awakening and guru.”

Buck barked out a soggy laugh, “You turned my entire world on its axis man, but in the best way possible.”

“You’re a special one Evan and Eddie… god what you two have and what it can be.” Tommy shook his head chuckling, “I can’t stand in the way of that anymore.”

The younger firefighter stuttered out a breath, “I think that’s more on me than you.” And gets a hum of agreement from his now ex-boyfriend. He stuck a hand out, “Friends?”

Tommy didn’t even hesitate and slapped his own hand into Buck’s, squeezing tight, “Absolutely. Just give me some time, and yourself as well.”

Buck took two days after the break-up to mourn what had been his best relationship to date, to wallow in his unknown carelessness, and to confront those mixed emotions that drew him to Tommy in the first place. Then he packed his duffle and went to work.

Chimney was the first to confront him since Tommy turned down a night out at the karaoke bar and explained that he and Buck broke up. Hen followed because those two paramedics tell each other everything. Bobby reminded Buck that he was willing to listen before giving his shoulder a squeeze. Ravi seemed, relieved, but sympathetic. And Eddie pulled him into the tightest embrace asking, “Why?”

Buck didn’t give him the entire answer. Simply stated, “It wasn’t working.”

Months later Buck gave him the entire truth by taking a page out Tommy’s book and kissing Eddie senseless with a firm grip on his chin.  Eddie, who was babbling away in his kitchen about not seeing what was in front of him and desperate to know if Buck is willing to give Eddie every part of himself, kissed Buck back with ferocity. When they pulled apart Buck finally told him why Tommy ended things, “He saw what we were all too scared to look at.”

That was almost a month ago and Buck is deliriously happy with his life, with his boyfriend, with Eddie. He doesn’t need to be weird or nervous around the man that helped lead him here.  So, he winks at Eddie, telling him it’s all good, and gives his attention to Tommy. “No big newsworthy rescues. Though Chimney did rescue his 100th cat.”

Tommy shakes his head laughing, “An almost impossible feat.”

“Very much so.” Buck comments, “We’re here to celebrate Maddie’s promotion at dispatch. Officially a supervisor.”

“Hey good for her!” Tommy exclaims, “Honestly surprised it took this long. Her voice seems to be on all the major calls lately.”

Buck nods, “Yea. Would have been a different ending for all of us after the bridge collapse last year if it weren’t for my sister.”

“Man, you Buckley’s and your heroism.”

Buck blushes, Tommy Kinnard always the charmer. The other man smirks, knowing the effect he has on him still. “You look good Buck. Happy. Wouldn’t have anything to do with a certain firefighter that’s all over your Instagram lately? Hm?”

As if summoned by Tommy’s mere mention of him, a red Henley covered arm snakes its away around Buck’s waist and warmth lines up along his back. “Hey Tommy, good to see yuh man.” Eddie greets smoothly before nuzzling close to Buck’s ear, “Get that drink order in yet babe?” He asks just loud enough to be overheard by certain people close by.

The pilot’s smirk broadens, but gives a friendly slap to Eddie’s back, “Good to see yuh too Diaz. Been a minute.”

Eddie nods and his nose moves along Buck’s jaw at the movement, making him tremble, “It has. Maybe we can meet up to spar sometime.”

Before his bisexual awakening and the admittance of his true feelings, hearing his boyfriend make plans with another man would have sent him on a downward spiral. Now, thanks in part to Tommy, Eddie, his sister, and the entirety of the 118, but mostly himself, Buck is secure and at peace with his place in their lives, in Eddie’s life.

But that still doesn’t stop his big hearted, ever thoughtful boyfriend from asking, “I know I’ve only taught you the basics, but you could join Evan.”

Buck leans back into Eddie’s embrace and brushes his lips against his partner’s cheek, “Hmm. I’d rather go for the title on more equal grounds, and I really want to save myself the embarrassment of Tommy seeing my ass get kicked.”

His ex snorts out a laugh, while Eddie’s cheeks pinken at Buck’s innuendo of the actual kind of sweaty, half naked situation they want to be in. “Still shameless as ever huh Evan?” Tommy comments.

Buck shrugs, “Nothing to be ashamed of. My boyfriend is hot and I prefer to have my ass handed to me in more intimate ways. But you two can kick, spin, and punch your little hearts out. I’ll enjoy some time with Christopher, maybe even take him to a field and play the much superior sport, football.”

“God you really do not like basketball huh?” Tommy retorts with a shake of his head, probably remembering the first and last time they played, ending with Buck almost breaking Eddie’s ankle in a confused jealous rage.

“I won’t let him near anything orange and spherical.” Eddie jokes giving Buck a tight squeeze. “But if you are up to it, I would love to come over and go a few rounds. You do have a pretty sweet set up.”

The LAFD piolet grins, “Bring the Chevelle too, we can give it a once over.”

Buck makes a mental reminder to give the back seat of said car a good cleaning because the last time he and Eddie drove it out, Buck took Eddie apart in back seat and a t-shirt wipe down definitely did not suffice as ‘clean up’.

Eddie clears his throat, and his blush deepens. Yea, he’s thinking the same. “Sounds good. I’ll shoot you text and set up a time.”

Knowing the conversation is coming to an end, Buck flags down the bar tender before looking over at Tommy, “You should join us. Drinks are on,” He pauses trying to remember who lost the credit card roulette and laughs when it comes to him, “Drinks are on Josh.”

Tommy softens at the invitation, “Drinks with the 118, haven’t done that in a while. I’m in. Miller lite to start.”

Buck laughs, “Yea I know. Go join the others, Eddie and I got this.”

“Yea, I know you do. BuckandEddie, the dream team. Happy for you both, truly.” Tommy kindly states, then gives a shoulder pat to the two of them before strolling away to join the 118 and dispatchers. They faintly hear loud cheers and greetings when he gets close, their friends and family always happy to see the man who put his life and career on the line for them.

Buck places their drink order and when the bar tender slides away, Eddie pulls him back into his chest and growls into his ear, “You may not be green with envy anymore, but I sort of am.”

A shiver runs down Buck’s spine at his boyfriend’s possessive tone and knew all too well that their time at the bar was going to be short lived…unless.

“It’s no Chevelle, but the jeep is parked pretty close.” Buck breathlessly tells him.

Eddie gives him a wicked grin, “You want to take me in the jeep?”

“Wanna go for another title?”

I put in so many references from the episode and previous episodes too, as mini celebration to the 100th episode. Hope you all enjoyed! If you want to know when I drop coda fic go interact with my pinned post. Tagging (no pressure): @try-set-me-on-fire @devirnis @bi-buckrights @exhuastedpigeon @cal-daisies-and-briars @bidisasterbuckdiaz @rainbow-nerdss @daffi-990 @dangerpronebuddie @theotherbuckley @watchyourbuck @perfectlysunny02 @aroeddiediaz @loserdiaz @diazsdimples @fortheloveofbuddie @rogerzsteven @lemonzestywrites @evanbegins @bi-buck-coded @glorious-spoon @thekristen999 @spotsandsocks @sunshinediaz @lover-of-mine @hoodie-buck @elvensorceress @bucksbiawakening @giddyupbuck @goforkinard @bekkachaos @thewolvesof1998 @eddiebabygirldiaz @spaceprincessem @bibuckbuckley @honestlydarkprincess @doublecheekeddiaz @prosperdemeter2 @transboybuckley @nmcggg @monsterrae1 @missmagooglie @bigfootsmom @911onabc @911-on-abc @homerforsure

[sebastianswallows]

The Little Death — 3. Strengthen what they would prohibit

— PAIRING: Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x Bene Gesserit!Reader

— SYNOPSIS: A Bene Gesserit gets left behind in the Arrakeen palace. When Feyd becomes the Planetary Governor, he finds her there in hiding. The Harkonnens don't traditionally keep them as truthsayers or concubines like other Houses do, but Feyd might have a use for her. After all, he's never had a Bene Gesserit of his own before.

— WARNINGS: just a bit of smut

— WORDCOUNT: 2k

— TAGLIST: @elf-punk @lowlyloved @pomtherine​ @localravenclaw​

Laws to suppress tend to strengthen what they would prohibit. — Bene Gesserit Coda

Sleeping was sweet. At some point indistinguishable from oblivion she became aware of not being aware of being asleep, but she wasn’t ready to wake up yet. The tendrils of her mind touched only shyly the membrane on the other side of which reality was waiting. And even though her feet were cold and her head felt heavy, she felt as though she was floating in the air, held by some invisible force in perfect safety.

A sense of urgency tugged at her, and with reluctance she let herself be pulled. Gradually she realised that her neck hurt from the awkward pose she’d fallen asleep in. That she was sitting on the floor, her legs curled under her and stiff. That his hands were feeling up her body.

Her eyes opened to the sight of her new master sitting on his knees before her. Feyd was still completely naked, and his body dared to have a rosy flush from sleep across his pale white skin. He held a knife to her, slicing through her shift to part it from her body, smiling as if he was opening a gift. He paused at her chest and slid his hand across her skin — the one that wasn’t holding the blade, mercifully — and gently cupped her breast, holding it in such a way that her nipple was caught between his index and his thumb. A practised hand. She reacted before her body rebelled and responded to him.

“Get off of me,” she hissed, and in one motion she slapped his groping hand away and gripped the knife out of the other.

He looked at her in excitement for a moment, or perhaps his mind had not caught up to things and was still tasting her body. She flung the blade away before she could find out which. Feyd pouted like a spoiled brat.

“Yesterday, you agreed that —”

“I’m a Bene Gesserit, not a concubine,” she said as she pulled the tatters of the shift around her and moved further away.

Feyd was still processing the novel information that there was a difference when he got up to his feet. She busied herself with her ruined clothes and tried to ignore that his cock was right in front of her. He looked down and seemed a few times to want to say something, or ask, but then his mind was made up and he walked right past her. Oh, he just went to pick up his blade.

She took this opening to move away and gathered up her clothes.

“Won’t you dress me?” he asked, turning to her with a puzzled expression.

“No,” she said, plain as can be, and slipped into the washroom. She only caught him muttering something about her being useless as she shut the door.

He was gone by the time she came out again.

It crossed her mind that she might have hurt his feelings. After all, he can’t have been used to women slapping his attention away like that. He’d even been fairly considerate, for a Harkonnen. No blood drawn.

But in hindsight, she recognised her instincts were correct. She was the kind of toy he’d never had before. Nobody had ever treated him that way, and now he was going to spend the whole day trying to understand his own emotions, spilling his poison on the other staff no doubt.

She walked through the palace with newfound confidence, and even when eyes turned to her, followed her quick steps and the flowing of her gown, nobody dared question her. Quite efficient in communications, these Harkonnen. They already know who I am, she thought with reserved admiration.

Her first stop was the laundry to replace her ruined clothes and get a couple more. She would need them, living with Feyd-Rautha, it seemed. She ate later, quickly and in the most unassuming part of the canteen. Arrakeen gruel with a Harkonnen twist, dry and oily with a sprinkling of melange on top. It stuck in her throat and there was only cactus juice to wash it down with.

It was only during her noon meditations, on a lonely rock outside the southern wing, that the impact of everything that happened finally came upon her. She shivered terribly, felt tears bead at the corners of her eyes, and breathed deeply to steady her pulse. Fear had passed through her, and death, and she was still left standing. It was a very precise part she had to play, and for all her training and prescience, the spice could only show her certain futures.

Rejecting his touches had been the right choice. Refusing to look at his body had been the right choice too. She teased both him and herself, and the natural energies that flowed between men and women would do half the work for her, especially with such an excitable specimen as Feyd-Rautha to work with. Now all she needed to do was reward him.

She thought back to his nightmares, those twitches and struggles in the dark, alone, and she remembered the instincts of her body: to hold him, to comfort him, to feel his naked skin on hers and let them melt into each other. She smiled, thankful for the infinite genetic wisdom, guiding her path through this most dangerous of circumstances, because now she knew exactly what Feyd wanted.

“Terra firma,” she said to herself. “Something firm and unyielding. Capable of giving him both punishment and pleasure.”

She waited for him in his chambers by the window, sewing that morning’s ruined shift. Her mind was split between that task and meditation, letting her consciousness drift through the environment, expanding to the outer halls. There was a slight commotion in the hidden room next door, and she felt the unmistakable presence of Feyd there. He wasn’t alone. But he felt happy, confident, but with some restraint still in his manner. She could hardly grasp the threads of his thoughts before he moved too far away from her senses.

He entered the room not long after, stopping in the doorway when he saw her there.

She held his gaze, allowing her eyes to say nothing while his told her everything. He was apprehensive, excited, fearful, and fought against an inner urge to see in her a motherly figure — after all, she’d chosen to be seen sitting quietly in the pale light sewing quite on purpose. Her lips were set in a line that wasn’t yet a smile.

He shut the door behind him with finality and walked toward her.

“I hope you had a good day, my lord na-Baron,” she said, getting up to her feet to lightly bow.

“We started harvesting the spice again today,” said Feyd. “The first batches have already started filling the silos.”

He wanted to be praised…

“A great achievement. Your uncle must be pleased,” she smiled.

“Well, he’s always been easy to satisfy.”

Feyd stopped before her and shamelessly looked down her figure. He smelled of sand and sunlight, and a hint of cinnamon. She could almost feel the warmth radiating from his suit. Without asking, he reached for her hand that held the needle and let his finger trace its length. It fell off the sharp tip without breaking his skin.

“Fixing what I broke this morning?” he chuckled.

“Yes. I have the impression there will be many more mornings like that.”

“Not if you do as I say,” he rasped.

“I can not sleep naked as you do. The nights in Arrakeen are too cold.”

“Funny,” he said with a playful tilt of his head and a smile. “You didn’t seem to mind seeing me. Yet I can’t see you?”

She hardened her expression deliberately, chastisement evident in her every muscle. “No,” she answered.

He nodded and tried in other ways to seem indifferent, but he couldn’t hold it up for long. He gripped her sewing hand again, but this time harder, and without giving her the option to protest, he tore the shift from her hands and threw it down behind her.

“If you live to serve,” he hissed, “you serve.”

“That’s not what —”

“I don’t care.”

“You should.”

She didn’t stop him from unlacing her dress, although her every muscle shouted at her to. His fingers were more careful than she thought, and he made short work of it. Then, without daring to look into her eyes, he grabbed her shoulders and turned her around. He wanted to take her black veil off by himself… Of course.

He felt at first how it was held — pinned within her hair from both sides. As gently as a bard unboxing his instrument, he uncovered her, letting the veil fall to the floor, then his hands went to her shoulders and pushed the dress down her limp arms. It went down to her waist where a narrow belt held it.

She was surprised to feel a touch upon her back, careful and precise, but harsh. If she focused, she could almost hear his heartbeat, hear his breathing, see behind her closed eyelids the expression on his face. His presence was as intense as when she’d first seen him take his first steps on Arrakis. He was not someone who liked to be ignored.

She turned to find him smiling, and couldn’t help a shiver of pleasure to find him happy from so small a thing. She realised then that what he’d been enjoying was the way tendrils of her hair fell on her skin. She held his gaze and, as if it meant nothing to her, took out the pins that kept it all together. It fell in waves around her shoulders and framed her breasts in teasing curtains, her hardened nipples just barely peeking through.

Feyd drew a sharp inhale and smiled as if he’d just received a present. Even his eyes looked innocent for a moment as if all power and control were drained from him, rendered unnecessary, because he’d just gotten everything he wanted. And then she slapped him in the face.

It was probably the hardest hit she’d ever given, and it still wasn’t enough to move him. He didn’t even waver on his feet. But his expression fell from pampered to petulant. It took a moment for his anger to be summoned up, and he flashed his black teeth at the sensation, cupping his cheek to soak the feeling in. He blinked and frowned at her — confused, perhaps, as to why she didn’t seem afraid, or why she dared to do it in the first place. But she saw in his expression a similar sort of thing to what passed across the eyes of sisters who accessed genetic memories. In his case, it was probably half-forgotten recollections from his childhood.

“You want it harder?” she asked with a deliberately indifferent tone.

Feyd didn’t waste a single breath. He gripped her throat and started squeezing, but she was unshakable now. Beneath his skin, she knew, her slap still sang throughout his blood. She stood before him half-naked, and he was the vulnerable one.

She slid her hands out of the sleeves of her dress and gripped his wrist — not to push it away, but to hold it — and dipped her head to bite into the flesh between his fingers. Feyd breathed in but let her do it, a shiver of pleasure running up his arm. He moaned, and immediately she felt his blood against her tongue. Pretending to enjoy it, she closed her eyes and drank it down. Then, with a kittenish lick at his wound in parting, she raised her head and started walking.

“You say I’m here to serve,” she whispered, pushing him toward the bed. “I know just how you want it.”

She brought him to the edge of the mattress and kneeled, forcing him to sit down. He did it as if mesmerised. As reward, she kissed him where his skin was bleeding, then sank her teeth in it again.

[hippolotamus]

another installment of what I'm calling the cleopatra series. this time from Eddie's POV because I got in my Buddie feels. part 1 here 💙

late for the love of my life | 7x06 Coda | 912 words | G

“Hey, how was it?” Marisol wraps her arms around his waist, giving him a peck on the lips. 

Eddie barely suppresses the urge to flinch and turn away. Which is maybe a tad dramatic, except for the way it isn’t. Because the past 24 hours have held more than a few revelations. None of which Eddie is ready to share. 

Despite the layers of clothing between them, his skin tingles and crawls where she touches him. If he didn’t have years of experience being exposed to fluids, substances and people he didn’t want anywhere near him, he thinks he would have wrenched away from her by now. No, he definitely would have. But he’s a professional at hiding his personal reactions, both on and off the job. 

Yes, he’s made progress in therapy, but the instincts to hide himself, to put up walls and masks, are still easily activated. Handy for moments like now, when he can’t escape his girlfriend. Or when he has to smile big for the crowd and pretend the perpetual feelings for his best friend don’t exist when said best friend barrels back into the room all lovestruck and covered in soot from his boyfriend. 

“It was good. Really nice, actually.” That much is true. Because it was. Honestly, the whole hospital room chic was perfectly Maddie and Chim. 

“Nice?” She asks in a teasing tone, squeezing tighter and clinging to his torso like a koala. 

His breathing is acceptably even but the urge to peel her off, to tell her that she should probably go home because his heart rate is skyrocketing, his fingers and toes are tingling, and he’s beginning to feel claustrophobic is anything but. His built in panic mode suspects there isn’t enough Jell-o in the universe to undo this. Again, dramatic, but he thinks he’s within his rights to think so right now. 

“Yeah, I-” He pinches the bridge of his nose, squeezes his eyes shut and inhales as deeply as he can manage. “Y’know, I’m, uh, still feeling a little worse for wear from last night. I should-” He doesn’t even finish the sentence, just points vaguely in the direction of his bedroom. 

Marisol’s relaxed ‘welcome home’ look turns concerned as she furrows her brow and holds the back of her hand to his forehead. “Are you okay? Do you want me to stay? I should probably stay over in case you need–” 

“Really,” he interjects, backing out of her hold, “I’ll be fine. Just need to sleep it off, I think. You should go. Home. To your place.” Smooth, Diaz. “I mean, because I’ll probably be restless, y’know?”

“I can sleep on the cou-”

“No,” he says more forcefully than intended. He should be grateful she wants to stay and take care of him. He should. He is. But not the couch. Not… Buck’s bed. His place. Their place.

“Oh.” She takes a step back and he should probably feel worse about the way she looks so dejected. “I, um, I understand. Talk tomorrow?”

“Yeah, talk tomorrow.” 

Tomorrow when I’ve had a chance to reset. When the twin alcohol and love hangovers have hopefully, finally died off. When I’m not seeing an endless mental projection reel of reminders like Or, y’know, you could have mine. Then why are you in hospital jail? Stay with me, Buck. Him choking on blood. You saved him. Abby. His fiancee is Abby. Showoff. My blood on him. Hey, Buck. You think you’re expendable. They’re all dead. I, uh, misunderstood the assignment. Three minutes and seventeen seconds. She sees me. It was a date. 

The front door clicks in the latch and he immediately turns the deadbolt, noting how his pulse drops to a debatably more normal range. He wants to settle on the couch, under the covers in his bed, both and neither all at the same time. In the end he migrates to the kitchen, which really shouldn’t surprise him. 

He runs his fingers over the backs of the chairs, circling around until he’s standing between the table and main counter. Am I one of the things that makes you sad? So now am I allowed to ask how you are? But you do eventually - you process it? 

Eddie turns toward the fridge, drawn to Shannon’s photo. He plucks it from under the magnet, running his thumb over the glossy print. 

“Can never quite get my timing down, can I?” He huffs out a wet chuckle. “God, I wish you were here right now. I could really use someone to talk to.” 

If it wasn’t after midnight he would probably drive himself to the cemetery to sit on the stone bench. To talk to someone that can’t talk back but would nonetheless tell him what an idiot he is. To unfairly water her grave with tears shed because he always thinks he has more time. You might have noticed I almost died. Again. And then I thought, this is it. This is the last day of my life. We’re all going to die alone. That’s what she said to me and Hen. 

Truthfully he’s not sure who he’s thinking of more — Shannon or Buck — as he slides to the floor, still clutching her picture, beginning to sob and shake as the words I love you so much flash like a neon reminder of his poor timing. Does it really matter? Because either way he’s missed his chance. 

But I guess it’s your mess now. 

Part 3 (Buck's POV)

[inawickedlittletown]

Aftermath - 7x09 Coda

Knock. Knock. 

Tommy looked towards Evan. They had started the evening by cooking together, but after dinner, they had put on a movie. Evan had actually seen very few movies and Tommy was doing his best to rectify that especially since Tommy was a bit of a sucker for rom coms. You’ve Got Mail was on the screen and they weren’t even far in. 

Knock. Knock. 

Evan groaned. 

“Are you expecting anyone?” Tommy asked as they detangled themselves from each other. 

Evan shook his head, pressing pause on the remote. Tommy followed him to the door. 

Christopher stood on the other side. He looked awful. Eyes red, glasses askew, and lips turned down. He looked nothing like the kid that Tommy had last seen in Howie’s hospital room.

At first, Tommy was worried that Christopher had somehow gotten there on his own,  but just a bit behind him was Marisol. She didn’t look all that great either. 

“He wanted to come here,” Marisol said. Her voice was weak and small. “Least I could do.” 

Christopher didn’t even wait to be invited in, he just walked past Evan, barely glanced at him or Tommy. Tommy caught Evan’s eye and Evan gave a nod, so Tommy followed Christopher inside. He heard Evan talking to Marisol, but not all the words or even what she said back. 

Christopher had settled himself into Evan’s couch. He looked small, shoulders hunched over and his arms crossed. 

“Hey,” Tommy said gently. “Are you okay?” 

Christopher shook his head. No words.

“Do you need anything? A drink? Food? Blanket?”

No response. 

Tommy wasn’t used to kids. The one time he’d met Chris before that time at the hospital, it had been at Eddie’s house and Christopher had led that conversation by being interested in Tommy being a pilot and asking a bunch of questions. 

“Look, I don’t know what happened or why you’re here. I don’t need to know. But you’re safe here, okay?”

At that he got a nod. 

“Is it okay if I leave you here on your own for a few minutes?” 

Another nod. 

Evan was still at the door. He joined him and found Marisol still standing at the other side. She’d started to cry, big tears that rolled down her cheeks and that she was angrily wiping away. Her arms were wrapped around her middle. 

“I’m sorry,” she said, a sob breaking through. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Evan said. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Do you want to come in? You shouldn’t be driving. Eddie would—”

She made a noise at Eddie’s name and Tommy winced. 

“Sorry,” Evan said, hand reaching out to Marisol except she stepped back. 

“Did you know?” she asked. 

Tommy could see Evan’s indecision. He could see how he shifted his weight as he gave a small nod. 

“I confronted him about it a few days ago,” Evan said. “Right after I found out.”

“She looks like his dead wife,” Marisol said and it came out strangled. 

“I know,” Evan said. 

She rubbed at her eyes. “How could — no…no, I can’t deal with this right now. Take care of Christopher.”

Tommy jumped forward. “Hey, I can drive you if you—”

She shook her head. “My brother’s picking me up. He should be here soon.” 

Marisol looked like she wanted to say something else, but she shook her head and then turned and left. They were left watching her go. 

“Chris?” Evan asked. 

“Is okay. Upset, but okay,” Tommy said. “Did everything blow up on Eddie?” 

“You could say that,” Evan said. “Marisol said they walked in and the doppelganger and Eddie were there. Chris thought it was his mom.”

Tommy felt his heart break. He could never fully understand Eddie’s grief — hoped he never would. When Evan had told him about Kim he hadn’t known how to react because it was just so out there and messy and insane. But to have it affect Christopher…well, that was something that Tommy could understand. His parents had disappointed him enough…he knew that disconnect between loving someone and feeling completely betrayed. 

“What now?” Tommy asked. 

“Well, first I’ll need you to text Eddie that Chris is here and that he’s staying the night.” Evan smiled a tight sad smile. “Next we give him somewhere to feel safe until he’s ready to talk to his dad.” 

“Of course he feels safe,” Tommy said. “He came to you.” 

Tommy pulled Evan into his arms and he felt Evan sigh against him, his arms coming around Tommy as well. He pulled back too soon, but with a new found determination and Tommy could only watch as his boyfriend headed towards Christopher and despite everything, he was warmed when Christopher wrapped his arms around Evan’s waist, head buried on Evan’s chest. 

[lemonlyman-dotcom]

Redemption fic recs [previous fic recs can be found here🍋]

Sharing some of my favorite fics related to redemption and/or Owen & Tommy for @lonestar-s5countdown

Blood on the tracks, fire in the hills by thenorthface - An AU where the winter storm/ice pond rescue never happened -

Carlos made his way to the victim’s bedroom, located down a narrow corridor, across from an equally cramped bathroom. The very first thing he saw after stepping through the doorway was T.K. Strand, slumped in a chair in the corner of the room, drenched in blood. Carlos’s knees gave out so abruptly that he had to grab for the frame to catch himself before he hit the ground. “No,” he heard himself say, in a voice that didn’t sound anything like him

How I linger to admire by @ladytessa74 - In which Carlos tries not to get lost in grief, learns what makes a good husband and solves his father’s murder.

anger has told me her real name is grief by @alrightbuckaroo - Carlos is letting his grief manifest into anger; no matter how much he doesn't want it to.

Sweet Dreams and Flying Machines by @carlos-in-glasses - The past becomes a thunderous echo when TK misses his mom’s funeral after his plane makes an emergency landing, while Carlos spirals thinking he’ll never see TK again. Safe on the ground, TK and Carlos hold each other up as they face the day’s trauma and begin a future that is somehow even more crowded with love.

tried and true blue by @reyesstrand - "She knows," Owen says, his eyes almost too sincere for TK to handle. He clamps his molars together and just stares at his father, because if he lets himself think too hard about all the ways his mom is still here, somehow, he'll probably burst into tears. Owen gives him a sad smile. "She does, TK. She used to talk about when you'd get married all the time." There's a pause, and TK curls his fingers tighter around his mug, letting everything simmer between them. "When I got married," TK quietly repeats. "Not if?" * Or, a 4x08 coda.

Tagging some folks in to make some recommendations of their own if they’d like: @thisbuildinghasfeelings @ladytessa74 @carlos-in-glasses @emsprovisions @eclectic-sassycoweyes @alrightbuckaroo @bonheur-cafe @chicgeekgirl89 @decafdino @certifiedflower @guardian-angle22 @goldenskykaysani @herefortarlos @just-inside-her @firstprince-history-huh @kiwichaeng @literateowl @messymindofmine @never-blooms @reeeallygood @she-walked-away @whatsintheboxmh

[nobigsecrets]

(Not) The Right Time

Inspired by @creativepromptsforwriting Prompt #1085: Maybe this was not the right time. But maybe if he didn't try now there would never be time for it again. Fandom: 9-1-1 Rating: T Summary: Tommy's side of things between cutting short the first date and agreeing to the coffee date. Coda to episode 7x05.

Read on AO3

Tommy's phone started ringing just as their latest call came in. He fumbled it out of his pocket on the way to the pre-flight briefing and then stopped dead in his tracks once he got a look at the display.

Evan (118), it said and Tommy stood in the middle of the hallway, the phone buzzing away in his hand and his thumb hovering over the display indecisively. Unbidden, his mind produced an image of the last time he'd seen Evan, last night to be precise, when Tommy had left him standing at the curb in front of the restaurant. At the time, he'd been convinced that cutting their date short was the safest thing he could do. For both of them. That it was just as much self-preservation as the need to make sure he didn't push Evan into things he wasn't ready for.

But the way Evan's face had fallen in disappointment when Tommy had left had followed him all the way home and through the rest of the night. Looking back at it now, Tommy could admit his decision had been a little rash. Maybe even unfair. He liked the guy—

Before Tommy could make up his mind about accepting or declining the call, it went to voicemail and he felt like catapulted back to the present from his memory. Suddenly he was acutely aware of the bustling of the station all around him, of the engine noise in the distance, of someone walking past him in the hallway, a brief touch to his shoulder, "You coming with, Kinard?"

Tommy sighed and shoved his phone back into his pocket. Maybe it was for the best. Maybe this was not the right time.

He sat through the briefing, absorbing all relevant information on the requested flight, which was basically a standard air ambulance transport. Not an emergency per se, but the transport of an intensive care patient from a hospital in the suburbs to a specialized and better equipped clinic downtown. He checked the given coordinates, plotted the route in his mind, added weather conditions and looked for potential risks, not finding any.

Halfway through the meeting, Tommy felt his phone buzz again inside the pocket of his flight overall, with, what he supposed, was an incoming text message. It could be anyone sending him a text, he tried to reason with himself, but he couldn't quite shut up the part of his mind hoping it was from Evan.

He forced himself to listen to the additional information and medical requirements of the flight, even if they were more relevant to the attending aeromedic than to the pilot. He was nothing if not one hundred percent professional, but he couldn't shake the antsy feeling crawling up his back and the way his phone seemed to burn a hole through his pocket.

That was why he found himself lingering after the briefing, pretending to check the weather charts again when in reality he was waiting until everyone else had cleared the room. When he pulled his phone from his pocket for a second time that evening, he was surprised to find an actual voicemail waiting for him instead of the expected text. Tommy hit call, trying to ignore the rush of anticipation that seemed to hit him out of nowhere—

"Hey Tommy, it's Buck— uh, it's me, Evan," the message said and Tommy had to grin despite himself. He'd meant what he'd said, Evan was adorable and just hearing his voice shook up his resolve pretty hard. "Listen, I assume you have a shift and I don't want to bother you but, uh, I just wanted to talk to you. Call me back? Please? I don't have a shift until Monday night. Okay, uhm. Take care."

By the end of the message, Tommy's grin had transformed into a fond smile. Fuck, but he really liked the guy. He ducked his head and closed his eyes for a moment, phone tipped against his forehead in thought.

It would be a lie if he said Evan's words hadn't hurt. While it had been somewhat cute that Evan had called himself an ally after he admitted it was his first date with a man, the denial of their date a few minutes later and the blatant lie towards Eddie had stung.

Tommy sighed, looked back at the screen with the weather forecast as if it held the answers he was looking for.

He'd told Evan that he didn't think he was ready, but maybe it was more the other way around? That Tommy didn't know if he was ready to deal with the whole process of coming out and coming to terms with who you are again?

Because Tommy understood just too well where Evan had been coming from. He remembered too well how he had felt when he'd been in Evan's place. The feeling of being torn between who he thought he needed to be and who he really was. The lying, the hiding, the guilt, the constant fear. It hadn't been a good place. And it had taken Tommy so many years, so much time and work and effort to build himself a place where he finally felt comfortable—

Maybe this was not the right time.

But then he remembered Evan's bashful smile when he'd admitted "because trying to get your attention has been kind of exhausting", and how sweet his kiss had tasted and how surprised, how pleased he'd looked after. And the point is, Evan had really made an effort, had really wanted to get to know him, and Tommy can't remember the last time someone had gone out of their way for him like that. Sure, Evan hadn't been aware of his own intentions, and sure, Tommy had felt flattered by his attention but it had also felt—special.

And now Evan was reaching out, again, even after Tommy had basically dumped him halfway through their date. And despite all his own insecurities, and Evan's insecurities, wasn't it worth a try? Shouldn't he, after everything he's been through himself, offer Evan the kind of understanding and patience and support that he never got?

There were footsteps in the hall and Tommy snapped back to the present just in time for Martinez sticking her head inside the room, face lighting up at seeing Tommy.

"Hey, Kinard, here you are," Martinez said. "I've been looking for you. You coming?"

Maybe this was not the right time.

But maybe if he didn't try now there would never be time for it again—

"Yeah, sure, I'll be right there," Tommy said, "need to make a quick phone call first."

[bestmusicalworldcup]

Best Act I Finale Song Tournament

As a prelude to the Best Musical World Cup 2024, this tournament will find the best Act I Finale song in musical theater.

The tournament begins on 8 October 2023.

Details on the tournament format are here.

Submissions are now closed!

Additional notes: If a musical has had multiple Act I Finales over the course of its history, all of them will be eligible to compete. If a musical's Act I Finale is not a song but a scene, than I will accept the last song performed in Act I. Finales of one act musicals are not accepted.

List of Entrants below the read more link.

One Day More Defying Gravity Nonstop Why We Build the Wall Tonight (Quintet) All I Ask of You Reprise La Vie Boheme Ever After The Ball Coda (Act I Finale) My Own Best Friend Esmeralda Father to Son Tomorrow Belongs to Me A Little Priest Climb Ev'ry Mountain So Much Better Memory (Prelude) Happy Ending Blackout Bottom's Gonna Be On Top I Believe Marry Me A Little Elephant Love Medley Alive Reprise Bad Idea A Light in the Dark Santa Fe The Torture Tango The Last One You'd Expect Morning Glow The Night Belongs to Us Before the Parade Passes By Along Came Bialy Tomorrow Is Anthem Till We Reach That Day Je dors sur des roses Gold Damned For All Time/Blood Money Sunday Day-O (The Banana Boat Song) Our Love is God Journey to the Past Killer Quest! Singin' in the Rain Impossible/It's Possible One Seventeen Your Wagon is on Fire Status Quo Run Away! I Am What I Am Act I Finale (Urinetown) A New Argentina Loser Geek Whatever Upgrade This World Will Remember Us The Riddle The Impossible Dream Tonight Belongs to You Momma, Look Sharp Jimmy Autumn/Finale You're Nothing Without Me Me Myself and I You Will Be Found The Name of Love and Moonfall Who I'd Be If I Can't Love Her Out of My Dreams Final Storm Ich Gehör Nur Mir Reprise Fearless Finale Erster Akt Right This Way Now You Know Hell to Your Doorstep Dear Friend Stronger Soliloquy Be Back Soon One Day It's My Life The Gods Love Nubia Wie wird man seinen schatten los Sirens Somebody Will Do Something I Hope I'd Give My Life For You Aimer Natalya Daffodils The Beauty Underneath Pretty Funny Rush of Blood to the Head Starlight Express Say it Somehow Toledo Surprise A Man's Gotta Do (Reprise) I Got Rhythm What is it About Her? Defense Comfort and Joy Let it Go Just for Tonight It Must Be Believed to Be Seen Full Disclosure (Part 2) Until Tomorrow Monsters and Men Bright New Day Night of Our Lives Bugsy Malone (Reprise) It's A Grand Night for Singing The Trolley Song Cookies Woman Is Falling into You Before I Gaze At You Again Different I'm the Bravest Individual Crazy World A Blank Piece of Paper On the Verge My Favorite Time of Year The Plagues Bamboleo/There's a Tale Sunflower Bedknob Spell (Reprise 4) Interrogation Room / 취조실 / 取調室 It Is Not True! The Truth / 真相 Something is Starting to Change / 何かが変わり始めている

[spaceprincessem]

another lil coda for day 4 of robstar week. i kind of re-imagined the time during the brotherhood of evil plot where the titans were split across the world. loved the idea of the team having lil meet ups and late night calls and just taking whatever they can get to be with each other @robxstar

day 4 - downtime

how we touched and went our separate ways

The hot Nevada sun is just beginning to set beyond the horizon when Robin parks his motorcycle outside of a small diner. There’s a sign right off the road letting passerbyers know that Las Vegas is only 60 miles southeast and Death Valley 50 miles west. 

It’s one of those places no one really notices; a last chance run of the mill restaurant to get something decent to eat before you’re stuck in the middle of the desert. Beast Boy swears by their mac and cheese and rhubarb pie.

(Robin’s not really sure where the hell they get the rhubarb though, but the diner is sitting at a crossroad and stranger things have happened.)

It’s the closest meeting point for the whole team, and despite the short window of time they have before their (seemingly) never-ending mission to unite Titans across the world against the Brotherhood of Evil, they take whatever they can get to see each other.

It’s difficult getting all five of them together. 

The past few weeks have consisted of quick dinners or a few stolen hours in each other’s company. Robin was lucky enough to see Raven a few days ago when they passed through the same town. They got coffee and video chatted with Cyborg before their missions called them away again. 

He hates the team being so divided, but the quicker they get this done the sooner they can all go home. 

And Robin really misses being home. 

They’ve all opted for street clothing in their public meetups, not wanting to draw attention or risk the Brotherhood attacking them during their small moments of peace. 

He’s pretty sure he’s a little early, possibly the first one there until he looks up through the window and spots Starfire sitting at the counter sipping a milkshake. She’s dressed in jeans and a colorful crop top sweater with space earrings Beast Boy gave her as a gift from a shop near Area 51.

Robin swallows the sudden flutter of nerves that never cease to leave him be when he sees her. His heart is equally traitorous, thumping against his chest, pulling pulling pulling him to her. He follows the tug, easily falls into her gravity — her magnetism — like he was born for it.

And sometimes he thinks he was.

They may be from different worlds, but whatever stardust made them is one in the same.

Some Journey song is playing on the Jukebox — Separate Ways (World’s Apart) — and Robin smiles at the irony of it. Starfire is tapping her finger against the glass in time with the music, her focus lazily held by two dude bros tripping over themselves to talk to her. His fingers tap the small of her back and stay there like a warning that the boys clearly take heed of. 

Starfire turns, lips spreading into that dazzling smile as she leans into him, like maybe she’s caught in his gravity too. 

“Hi.” He says, softly.

“Greetings.” She replies, gently laying her hand on his arm.

Being here now, so close and yet never close enough, Robin realizes how long it’s been since they’ve seen each other.

He realizes how much he fucking missed her.

He wants to touch and take and taste every part of her, like a man starved for oxygen. With the way her eyes sparkle in the orange hue of the setting Nevada sun he knows that she feels the same.

He’ll never forget the first time they kissed.

It was just after one of their more dangerous missions that required a tag team. The appearance and sabotage of Madame Rouge quickly complicated things and it was one of those rare times they barely made it out alive. 

Robin can still sometimes feel the way his heart ripped right out of his chest when he thought he lost Starfire. When she appeared at his side seconds later, bruised and bleeding, he didn’t stop to think; he simply let his instincts — his wants and desires take over. 

Her blood was sharp and strangely sweet on his tongue, the taste of her seared in his brain forever. The hunger, the dire need to take more more more somehow melted into soft sacredness, like something holy. Robin wanted to take his time memorizing the way her lips perfectly slotted against his own and how kissing her was the easiest thing in the world.

Like they were made to fit this way.

Of course, they couldn’t keep the hunger, the animal desire, at bay for long. He needed her in every way imaginable and she needed him just as much.

They haven’t had time since then to just be. To be around each other and hold each other and enjoy this new step in their relationship. They’ve survived off of late night calls and text messages when they can help it.

Robin’s known for a while that he loves her; something he’s not allowed to say or even think about for too long right now.

Maybe someday. 

Someday.

“Beast Boy will be mad if we order pie without him.” Robin finally says as he takes the seat next to her.

“I have been patiently waiting for you all to arrive.” Starfire chides gently, but her smile takes out any of the heat in her words.

“Here I was thinking I was early.” He grins, leaning in for a quick, soft press of their lips.

Starfire tastes like chocolate malt and whipped cream and something so magical it simply is not made of this earth. She hums against his lips before moving to press her own against the corner of his mouth.

“I believe flying is faster.” She teases.

“Well Raven can teleport,” Robin pouts, “and she’s not here yet.”

As if summoned by her name the small bell on the door rings and they both turn to see Raven heading over to where they are seated.

“I’m right on time.” She says, taking the other seat next to Robin, giving him a pointed look.

He withers a little under her stare, but it’s cut by Starfire’s giggle and Raven eventually giving in by smiling. Cyborg and Beast Boy join them just as the waitress pours Robin a fresh cup of coffee.

“I’ve really missed y’all,” Cyborg says after their order’s been taken. “I’ve even missed BB’s bad jokes.”

“Don’t get him started,” Raven says flatly, but the pink tint to her cheeks gives her away.

“Cyborg,” Beast Boy says dramatically, “have I not added you to my meme chat? I’ll have to amend that immediately.”

Cyborg’s phone pings and he quickly scrolls through it, his shoulders shaking as he tries not to laugh.

“This is just you trying to teach Star how to use memes.”

“And,” Beast Boy grins, “it’s working.”

“Beast Boy recommended we all watch the, and I quote,” Starfire says somewhat seriously, “the cinematic masterpiece that is Shrek when we all get home.”

“Lord help me.” Raven mumbles.

Robin joins in with Cyborg’s laughter as Beast Boy scoffs in Raven’s direction. Starfire just watches with amusement, her fingers catching Robin’s under the counter for a moment.

“Movie night when we get home,” Robin says, as he picks up his fork with his free hand, “sounds like a good plan.”

His friends all smile in return and they all take their time eating, wanting the night to last just a little bit longer.

“Does anyone know how the hell they get all this rhubarb out here?”

[sibylsleaves]

all at once you are the one i have been waiting for

7k | rated T | read on ao3

Days after the lightning strike, showing up at Eddie’s door, falling asleep on his couch. Buck had come to him. And Eddie had thought, maybe. Had thought, it’s almost time. And so he’d gotten him all dressed up and taken him out and they’d had fun and they’d laughed and maybe even flirted and Eddie had been so goddamn happy, so excited for what the future held. They were right at the threshold, he’d thought. No more doubts, no more fears, nothing holding them back, just the two of them stepping forward together. And now this.

He doesn’t understand how he could have gotten it so wrong.

or, Buck and Eddie are finally on the same page--until they're not. (A coda for 6x13 and a sort-of spec fic for 6x14/6x15)

When Eddie walks into the kitchen, Buck is pacing, phone clutched to his ear, stuttering and stammering his way through what sounds like the most awkward phone call anyone has ever experienced.

“No, it’s not a dare,” Buck says into the phone. “No, I just—I wanted to know because—statistically speaking—”

His face scrunches in a way that’s definitely not adorable (who would ever think that?) and then he lowers the phone from his face just as he turns and finds Eddie leaning against the kitchen counter.

“She hung up,” Buck explains needlessly, dropping his phone onto the counter.

“Imagine that,” Eddie replies dryly. “Have you been calling women all afternoon?”

They got off shift hours ago, and Eddie took Buck back to the Diaz house where they both crashed out for a well-deserved nap after a busy twenty-four. It’s early evening now, and Eddie just woke up. From the looks of it, Buck’s been awake a lot longer.

“Uh,” Buck says. “You want a beer?”

He pulls two out of the fridge, pops off the tops and comes around the table to hand one to Eddie. He leans up against the counter next to him, so close their shoulders brush. Eddie hides a fond smile by taking a sip.

“Can I ask you something?” Eddie asks after a minute. Buck looks at him, eyebrows raised in anticipation. “What the hell are you doing?”

Buck freezes for a second, looking caught-out, and then he ducks his head. “It’s stupid, I know. But you heard that guy…eighty per cent of—”

“Yeah, I heard him,” Eddie agrees. “But how exactly does that lead to you calling up every woman you slept with years ago to see if they had a good time?”

Buck ducks his head again, blushing. “Doesn’t every guy want to know that he satisfied his partner?”

“Sure,” Eddie agrees. “But Buck—”

“I know it’s stupid,” Buck admits, looking down at his beer instead of at Eddie. “But I just…I hate the idea that I didn’t…that I wasn’t…” He swallows. “Good.”

All the amusement and confusion leaves Eddie like an exhale. Because this isn’t about sex, or those women, not really. This is classic Evan Buckley self-worth issues, rearing their head just when it seems like Buck is finally moving past them.

Eddie sets his beer down on the counter behind him and turns so he’s facing Buck completely. “Let me ask you something.”

Buck angles toward him.

“How did you feel about those encounters?”

Buck blinks at him slowly, as if this question has never crossed his mind before. “Well, I…it was fun, you know? It was a release. Got me out of my head.” He takes another sip of beer and then continues, “Looking back, I guess it seems shallow. But at the time…I don’t know. I was so lonely. I wanted…something. Attention. Affection, maybe? I just wanted to feel wanted, for once. Maybe it’s sounds stupid, but even if they were just one-night stands or hookups or whatever, it felt like…a connection. Like I wasn’t completely untethered to the world.”

Eddie has to fight down the feeling that rises in him at Buck’s words, at the vulnerable expression on his face. An ache threatens to swallow his chest, thinking of Buck the way he was then, before Eddie even knew him, just a lost, lonely kid who felt like there was no place on earth he belonged. Eddie’s seen glimpses of that Buck—the one who squared up to him when Eddie first joined the 118 because he felt like his place there was threatened. The one that withdrew into himself and tried to sue his way back into a job that he felt like he was nothing without. 

The one that looked Eddie in the eye in a hospital room and said, I think it might’ve been better for him if I was the one who got shot.

“It doesn’t sound stupid, Buck,” Eddie says softly. “I get it, actually. You know, when things really broke down between Shannon and me, sex was the one thing that still made me feel connected to her. Even if I was hurt and couldn’t trust her, it was the one way I felt like I could hold on to her. So I do get it.”

“That’s different,” Buck says, gaze dropping back to the ground. “I mean, she was your wife. I thought I was finding connection with those women but it was only when I was with someone I really cared about that I realized how different it was. When the connection was real.”

“With Abby, you mean,” Eddie says, and he can’t quite keep the bitterness out of his voice completely.

Buck just nods. “Yeah. And after her, I knew that any hook-up would only make me feel lonelier. And that was also when I finally…felt connected to the world. To people. Our team. Maddie.” His gaze slides over to Eddie. “To you and Chris.”

Eddie takes a careful breath, holding Buck’s gaze.

“So it felt like I didn’t…need it, the same way. But I guess I do miss it, you know? Not—not sex, exactly. But feeling completely and totally connected to someone in that way.” He drops Eddie’s gaze again. “But part of me also wonders if I’ve ever really had it at all. I felt a connection with Abby. I did. And Ali. And Taylor.”

Eddie seals his lips together to stop himself from making a noise, or a face, that will give him away completely.

“But there was always some part of them…or part of me, that stopped us from having that complete, total connection. Where there are just…no walls, nothing holding you back from each other. Where it’s just total trust, and safety, and…” He stops, like he’s biting back the words he wants to say, and then shakes his head. “So I just wonder, sometimes. What that would be like. Especially now.”

“Now?” Eddie asks, his voice coming out rough.

Buck looks back up at him. Holds his gaze. “Now that I’m finally ready for it.”

(keep reading on ao3)

[dnfao3tags]

Monthly Fic Roundup - January 2024

starting the new year off with a bunch of bangers!

make sure to leave some love :]

— things that stand to reason by tippysleeps (expl. | comp. | 4k) ; alpha x alpha

And then he’s coasting past twenty, and he’s trying hard not to imagine Dream as some faceless alpha who would grip his hips and fuck him like he’s chasing George’s approval. And then he’s almost twenty-one, and he wakes feeling like his whole body is on fucking fire, and his cock is leaking all over his sheets, and he starts rutting into the mattress like it’s the only thing he knows how to do. And he’s a fucking alpha. And the world crashes down around him.

— moss and porcelain by pondsofkoi (gen | comp. | 1k) ; scar fic

“Can I look at your scar?”

— Him Whom My Soul Loves by definitelynotczargasm (expl. | comp. | 61k) ; 18th century!george x modern!dream

DNF Time Travel AU

note: was published in nov but it was completed in this month so im gonna include it anyways!

— Remember When by minecraftsteve42 (mat. | comp. | 24k) ; jealous!george

Dream starts dating again and George realizes he's not over the fling they had. Can they repair their relationship or did they ruin it forever?

— private religion by 21questions (teen | comp. | 8k) ; band au

The European leg of Dream's tour brings a little more than just revenue and jet lag.

— Omission by VeggieHarumaki (mat. | comp. | 8k) ; siren!george

There has been a warning on every community board, every public building, and every post in this town for as long as Dream can remember. Do not speak to the siren.

— hanging out in my room by nervouswaltz (gen | comp. | 3k) ; milo shits the bed

“And you can’t sleep in the guest house?” Dream deflates, pathetic.

— stay the night by cqfnce (teen | comp. | 3k) ; milo shits the bed

inconveniences and idiots in love

— let it flood, let it flood by sappymix1 (mat. | comp. | 3k) ; established relationship

it's a new year, and they shower.

— Somewhere on a Plane Over the Atlantic by Scoops (consciousness_streaming) (teen | comp. | 3k) ; coda to Curse and Cure of the Internet

George wakes up ready to move to America with a "Right Hand Man" downloaded on his phone.

— love you always by hardtofindneuro (expl. | comp. | 56k | cancer fic but not mcd)

George takes care of Dream. I have cancer. Those three words changed George’s life.

— that got weird by dizzy (mat. | comp. | 1k) ; dreamnap bonding

Dream and Sapnap wait for George to get home.

— The Remedy to Everything by Simplysmitten (expl. | wip | 22k+) ; omegaverse + fwb + meetup

After nearly a year of waiting for his visa, George is finally allowed to go home. Home, meaning a house in Florida that was already inhabited by his two best friends, Dream and Sapnap. Being an omega, George feared what trouble moving in with two alphas could potentially create. He never expected that trouble would come in the form of soft curls and green eyes, sparking something irreversible inside himself.

— we need to talk by womanhunt, wooowriter (mat. | comp. | 7k) ; sapnap-centred + secret relationship

Sapnap is an oblivious idiot.

— More Convenient (An Arrangement of Sorts) by Simplysmitten (expl. | comp. | 7k) ; fwb

Dream can't get off without having a partner to please, but luckily for him, George just moved to America. (also they are idiots in love they are so dumb and so in love but not in an angsty way just a "they're so stupid" way)

— pride (n.): undefined. by Anonymous (gen | comp. | 4k) ; sexuality related + demisexual demiromantic gnf

“D’you wanna go to Pride with me?” Dream asks, out of the blue, on a Tuesday like any other. George looks up, putting a stop to his mindless scrolling and letting his phone fall by his hip on the mattress. Dream is looking at him, expectant, with a brow arched so high it nears his hairline. George isn’t sure he heard him right.

— I Read My Self-Insert Fanfiction to My Boyfriend by thiswasamistake (teen | comp. | 2k) ; established relationship

Dream and George watch and read Percy Jackson together.

[wildlife4life]

Seven (+) Sentence Sunday

Tagged by the super lovely @prosperdemeter2 @gayedmundodiaz @lemonzestywrites @rainbow-nerdss @devirnis @cal-daisies-and-briars @buddierights @disasterbuckdiaz @exhuastedpigeon @dangerpronebuddie @daffi-990 @tizniz @try-set-me-on-fire and @rogerzsteven Thank so much! Go check out all their snippets and works!

Well would ya'll look at that... I'm actually participating in a tag day with an actual wip and not a coda. Whoa. And even better... Its an NFL Buck snippet! WOOOOO! Want to see more NFL Buck? Please check it all out here!

"So." Karen begins, pulling Hen's attention from the book she's been trying to read for the past week. She quirks an eyebrow at her wife, "So?" "So my boss's son's, partner broke their leg Tuesday after tripping over their 15 year old terrier." Karen explains and Hen can't help but look back towards where Paisley is lounging on the arm chair (Hen's favorite seat that she has lost to that sassy fur ball) with worry. Her wife chuckles reading Hen's internal concern, "Babe, Paisley is as pure bred as they come. We'll be lucky if she makes it to 10." "That pure bred survived an earthquake and a collapsed building. I wouldn't put it past her to make it way past 10 out of spite alone.” Hen remarks, turning back to Karen. Karen rolls her eyes, but gets back on topic, "Anyway. Harris, that's the partner, got their hands on some passes to that super exclusive gay club, The Green Carnation for this Friday." "You mean the place that runs a background check rivaling the FBI, makes every patron sign NDA's, and will blacklist a person from every gay bar from here to Vegas if they break said NDA? The place that is rumored to host not only out celebrities, but also the deeply closeted, tilt the world on it's axis if they ever came out, big names? That gay club?" Hen questions, her excitement starting to rise. Her very sexy and somehow very connected wife smirks, "The very one. And poor Harris just can't fathom trying to hop around on one leg and not drink thanks to their newly acquired pain meds. So they had their partner-" "Your boss's son." Hen remembers, leaning towards Karen, who instinctually gets closer as well. "Karson, with a K, starts to asks around his dads work because you know, we're literal rocket scientist working on very classified information." "Who better to invite to a secret club than those who work on secret projects." "Exactly." Karen's smirk becomes wicked (and very sinful), "And wouldn't you know, the only non-straight and married person around is yours truly." Hen honest to go squeals, loud and bubbling with elation, "You got us passes to The Green Carnation?!" "With a pre-paid drink package. All we have to do is agree to the background check and sign the NDA." Karen replies with a broad grin. Hen can no longer hold herself back and practically tackles her wife with a teeth clattering kiss. Karen, as always, catches her and kisses back 110%. ("So, my 48 off falls on the weekend." Eddie states and he takes notice of Buck's sly grin forming, his boyfriend most likely on the same train of thought, "And since it's still your bye week..." "You want to dance the night away with other secret gays." Evan finishes. Eddie smirks, "And get a private room blow job." The quarterback's smile is almost feral like, "I'll make the reservation." And Eddie watches Buck tap on the contact Florists with the green clover next to it. The phone rings twice before a deep voice comes through the speaker, "State your member id." "Buckley, 201-09-18." "Diaz, 201-09-19." A quick moment of silence, then, "What can The Green Carnation do for you today Mr. Buckley and Mr. Diaz?")

Hmm... Is a certain run in going to happen???? We'll see!!! Hope you all enjoyed!

Tagging (no pressure): @hippolotamus @theotherbuckley @watchyourbuck @perfectlysunny02 @aroeddiediaz @loserdiaz @diazsdimples @jesuisici33 @fortheloveofbuddie @evanbegins @buck-coded @glorious-spoon @thekristen999 @spotsandsocks @sunshinediaz @lover-of-mine @hoodie-buck @elvensorceress @gayedmundodiaz @giddyupbuck @goforkinard @bekkachaos @thewolvesof1998 @eddiebabygirldiaz @spaceprincessem @eddiiediaz @honestlydarkprincess @doublecheekeddiaz @transboybuckley @nmcggg @monsterrae1 @missmagooglie @thebloomingheather @bigfootsmom

[peachpety]

Upon reflecting this past year, I’m reminded of one area as a fandom citizen that i am lacking - reading fic. And so was born an idea to canvas my fandom family and friends to share with me a fic they've written, art they've created, a podfic they've recorded in 2023 of which they are most proud.

This two part 'rec yourself' list is the result.

Part One features Drarry creations (heavily featured since that's my OTP). Part Two (here) includes a kick-ass mix of various HP ships and ships from other fandoms, including Carry On, Check Please!, Good Omens, Teen Wolf, and Stranger Things. Also, and most importantly, each entry presents a smol blurb from the creator about why they chose their particular piece as their 2023 favorite.

For ease in reading, I've also placed all submitted works posted to AO3 into a filterable bookmark collection, Rec Yourself 2023. Be aware that there's a range of ratings and archive/creator tags, so please, take appropriate responsibility for your personal consumption. And please also be sure to shower the creators with kudos and lovely comments.

Y'all. This endeavor has been a fucking blast. One thing's for sure, I am blessed, humbled and honored to know a whole bunch of fantastic, brilliant, fun folks. Big love to you all, and thank you for participating.

So go forth. Indulge and enjoy! xo peach

* * *

✩ @pato-roldnart ✩ Quiet as a mouse HP | Viktor Krum x Ron Weasely | ART | G rating | Unleashed!Fest 2023 I'm quite proud of this one, I don't know how I made it, I had never drawn them before! My mind went full "oh yeah ronvik " Also, I like the idea of them bonding over their pets and Ron seeing that Viktor cares about something else that is not Quidditch.

✩ @tontonguetonks ✩ Coffee and a Croissant HP Next Gen | Scorpius x Albus | 903 FIC | G rating There are parts of myself and my lived experience in every story and character I write—how I socialize, how I take my coffee… I can’t help it. In *Coffee and a Croissant*, I put a lot of myself in my ace and autistic Albus. He is very dear to me in this story, and in my Fizzy Lifting Drinks drabble. The fic is just a toe-dip in the Soulmate waters where Albus grapples with what to do if he is someone’s Soulmate, but they’re not his. Parts 2 and 3 are in the works, but there is no timeline on either of them. Maybe in 2024?

✩ @crazybutgood ✩ I Bloom Pink For You HP | Narcissa Malfoy x Pansy Parkinson | 993 FIC + ORIGAMI COMIC | M rating | HP Bodice Ripper Fest 2023 This whole idea came about because I got so excited to fold a corset for hp bodice ripper fest, realised I couldn't just submit that one thing, and started brainstorming more loose ideas. It all clicked together when I was inspired by a fic by @schmem14, whose writing I adore. I was so grateful and even more excited when Em gave permission to make this. From there started the self-indulgent process of folding fancy things with fancier papers for this origami comic, and I couldn't have done it without Em and my lovely support team.

✩ @seekercass ✩ Something Cosmic HP | Cedric x Draco x Harry | 1.7k FIC | M rating | Polyship Week 2022 A self-rec that I am still extremely proud of is a short fic written for Polyshipping Week 2022 called Something Cosmic. It's a small coda to Something Good to Always Keep, another fic that I wrote for Quidditch Fest 2021 that I cherish very much. Even though writing is still hard for me these days, I often think about this 'verse and what life is like for Harry, Draco and Cedric after they graduated from Oxford. These three and slice of life bring me such joy. I hope to write more of them.

✩ @roseharpermaxwell ✩ Sounds Worth It HP | Hermione x Draco | 5k FIC | T rating | D/Hr Advent 2023 Being nominated for d/hr advent was a sweet surprise. It gave me a good excuse to remember how to write and the nudge I needed to create something this year.

✩ @basicallyahedgehog ✩ (They) Keep Me Warm HP | Hermione x Harry x Ron | 5.8k FIC | E rating | HP Trans Fest 2023 This was my transfest fic - I wrote it as a love letter to all my trans and Enby friends and as a way of processing some of my own feelings. It’s my first (and so far only) foray into poly golden trio and I loved playing with their dynamics with that added layer to their relationship.

✩ @lumosatnight ✩ For I Have Found Salvation HP | Harry x Severus | 7.1k FIC | E rating | Snarry AUctoberfest 2023 Although this is a smut fic at its core, I tried really hard to make the pacing flow, bringing in background characters, and creating memorable imagery. I am very proud of how it turned out. However, this is probably my favorite fic from 2023 simply for the fact that I had the most fun writing it!

✩ @sugareey-makes-stuff ✩ Feel You Breathing Teen Wolf | Derek Hale x Stiles Stilinski | 8.4k TEXTING FIC | E rating | 2023 Year of the OTP This is my fav 2023 piece because I learned how to create a custom text message AO3 skin, stylize things for plain text reading, and I wrote a whole story  that had some plot that was told through text messages. Also, I did not know I could achieve so much spiciness and throw in so many bad pick-up lines through this medium, but hey, the more you know! XD

✩ @schmem14 ✩ Mastermind HP | Harry x Ron; Draco x Harry; Ron x Draco | 10.7k FIC | E rating | Dronarry Fest 2023 This is one of the few times a story just flew out of me. Possessive stalker Draco sets out to win over Ron in this creepy thriller, but there’s a catch: Ron is already in love with Draco’s boyfriend, Harry.

✩ @drwhoisginnyholmes & @fledglinger ✩ Not Bad, For A 6000 Year Old Classic! Good Omens | Aziraphale x Crowley | 11.8k FIC + ART | E rating | DIWS Reverse! Reverse! Mini Bang

✩ @sniperjade ✩ The Sounds of Us HP Marauders | Regulus x Remus | 20.4k FIC | M rating | Remus Lupin Fest 2023; HPFC Spring Fling 2023 I've been thinking about this for a couple of days and whilst I would really love to say it was the drarry I wrote for this fest last year my favourite would have to be this moonseeker I wrote for Remus Lupin Fest last year. It's my favourite because I lived this fic. It became the entirety of my personality for a whole month because I desperately needed to get to the chapter where Regulus was riding on Padfoots back, through the forbidden forest, with only the light of the full moon to guide them, just to try and help Remus. It's also just because it's very musical and I'm very musical so that makes me love it all the more.

✩ @ghaniblue ✩ Sleeping With Ghosts HP | Regulus x Draco x Harry | 21.9k FIC | M rating | Harry Potter Rare Pair Fest IV I posted a Regulus/Harry/Draco fic last month that I'm very fond of. I started writing it more than 1 1/2 years ago, before I ever read a single Regulus fic. It's triad fic, and I'm pretty proud of the way the individual relationships develop. That was important to me, and I think I succeeded. Posting the first fic on ao3 with this triad tag doesn't hurt either.

✩ @celilasart & @wolfspurr ✩ Shifted Teen Wolf | Derek Hale x Stiles Stilinski | 25k FIC + ART | T rating | Sterek Reverse Bang This work was created for sterek reverse bang, a collaboration fest where the artists create first and the writers write second. wolfspurr and I just clicked when we talked about my art and the things that it inspired in their writer brain ;D the result is just an amazingly sweet and wholesome fic, that is still set in the teenwolf universe as we know it. but unlike many other fics which are full of violence and danger, this one starts with a bang and then it is a beautifully woven story of two people who just complete each other. also... the working title for my art was: tiny fox & sour wolf.

✩ @orange-peony ✩ At the speed of light Carry On | Basilton Pitch x Simon Snow | 26.3k FIC | E rating I picked [this fic] because I had a lot of fun writing it! It started off as a drabble and ended up 26k because I just had a blast writing it and the fandom support was so lovely. Last but not least, Pato made an absolutely stunning art piece for this fic, and it was the best present ever.

✩ @wynnyfryd ✩ i don’t know, you figure it out Stranger Things | Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson | 35.4k WIP FIC | E rating bragging about yourself is difficult, but i’ll just say it’s my favorite because i’m proud of myself for sticking to one project for this long, i love all the artwork the fic has inspired, and i just think the line “the river styx must taste like pennies” fucks severely lmao.

✩ @decaflondonfog ✩ growing pains Check Please! | Eric Bittle x Kent Parson | 50k FIC | T rating i am not usually a long fic gal, which i think is in part lack of patience, but also how attached i get to a universe if i’m working on it for a longer period of time. i finished writing this back in june but this fic felt very “me” in many ways and i think about them so often still  so it’s definitely my 2023 creation i’m proudest of!

[happilylovingchaos]

Sorry again about my past rant, @lonestar-s5countdown… this is early but I had a lot to look for on AO3.

And oh boy. This is my only reaction to how deep the grief/ mourning tag is:

Judd:

3 am by Annide: Judd and TK spend a sleepless moment bonding over the things that keep them up at night, with the former thinking on the old 126 members.

Grace and Judd One-shots by ExpectSpellingErrors: Exactly what it says in the title. Go one at a time, though— there’s 751+ stories as of Aug. 3 this year!

Sometimes by Multifandom_damnation: Judd and TK aren’t that different in their respective trauma-scarred self-esteems. They just need to clear up their clouding pride and pain to understand that.

Nothing lasts forever by lydiamxrtin: Judd takes TK horse-riding, vís-a-vis 1x02.

Southern comfort by Araloth: Judd shows the new 126 what barbacoa is, resulting in a Southern dinner.

Hands over pulse points by isnt_that_wizard: An AU where Judd and Grace allow Tarlos to stay with them after they lose the townhouse.

Grace:

Of grief and grace by @AliceSchuyler: Grace loses her father earlier in this story, before he gets to meet her baby.

Ladder 126, please respond by trashpup: Explores further the devastation that followed Grace on the other side of the fertilizer factory.

911 Dispatcher’s week by SneetchesToo: Grace showing in canon and fanon why she’s the steady voice on the other end we know and love. Some comedic shenanigans ensue.

Wake me up by @AliceSchuyler: An Avicii songfic that follows Grace’s perspective and flashing moments of meeting Judd during the car accident on the bridge.

I could hold on forever by DoubleL27: It’s Judd’s turn to be there for Grace when she starts having bad dreams of her own.

Like a wrecking ball by machtaholic: Taking place sometime during 1x09, Grace visits TK to give him a self-care day.

This love we carry by fiddlersgreen: After he learns his lesson in 3x13, Carlos and Grace discuss their shared experiences of seeing their life partners in the worst pain possible: that of unimaginable loss.

Deep Dive for Grief: Will be split into different sections depending on the canon-compliant/ AU types.

Canon Codas:

Grand gestures by @lonestarbabe and Pigeonsplotinsecrecy: TK processes his breakup with Alex badly, leading into the drug overdose we see in the pilot.

@heytheredeann wrote 4 works, and all took place in Texas, all in Judd and Grace’s POV, all after the fertilizer factory explosion. I kinda can’t believe it isn’t already a series.

Those were the days by benjaminrussell: Judd has a bittersweet dream. Takes place before the Strands arrive in Austin.

In a world like this (I’ve got you) by @lire-casander: A 5+1 coda that sums up his POV of the events of season 1, and early season 2.

Teach me what I need to know (to be strong enough to let go) by hollyhobbit101: After 2x13, Tommy continues to mourn for Charles, but she’s got Grace to help her through.

No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear by lydiamxrtin: So far unfinished, but it explores how deep TK’s grief for Gwyn goes and how profoundly it changes everything in his life— not just how it’s broken, but how it can be put back together. Even if there’s a mother-sized hole left.

Let me by @heartstringsduet: A realistically sweet look at how TK and Carlos’ intimacy weathers the loss of Gwyn.

Both your smiles were twice as wide as ours by daisieflowers: A low-key one-shot of Alex’s reminiscence, some hints of grief, and remaining ambivalence toward his ex-boyfriend. It’s a little melancholic, but there’s catharsis in learning how one’s faring from the end before moving forward.

Tales of love and loss by micaurel: The 126 celebrates Dio de Los Muertos to grieve, commemorate and celebrate the lives of people they’ve known and loved.

Lou 2: Lou-o-ween! by @dragonbinx: As a Halloween get-together featuring Tommy’s girls and an escaped Lou 2 goes a bit awry (like it does), Tommy and Carlos reminisce on their own celebrations with the two people they loved.

Light the shadows on your face by @lire-casander: Not quite grief-focused, but it does feature Michelle saying goodbye (for now).

Tribute by ThirteenRedVampireBites: A 1x10 coda that follows up on the International Space Station loss. I think the fandom probably doesn’t know how badly needed this resolution was, especially for Grace and the astronauts’ families.

Grieving for Owen AU:

The last goodbye by buckdiaz: TK goes into hard denial when he learns why Owen hasn’t reported into work.

Long way to get by meditatinghoneybadger: Owen’s sudden death on the job causes TK to relapse in his grief. The rest explores how he and Carlos try to get through both his rehabilitation and the process of forgiving each other.

Taken by @whumpkeys: Another version of 1x04 when Owen doesn’t make it out of the crumbling house.

Grieving for TK AU:

Quédate by hollyhobbit101: A truly bad-future for Tarlos. I cried at this just as much as I did for Gwyn’s canonical death.

I got a feeling that it’s time to let go by @marjansmarwani: TK gets really close to death (like he kinda does), and the last one is still sad (spoiler alert) but there’s a different reason now for Owen to grieve.

Shut your eyes and fall apart by @marjansmarwani: TK dies for real, and the 126 comes together to grieve together.

Grieving for Tim Codas:

Who cares if one more light goes out in a sky of a million stars (it flickers, flickers) by gapsinthedays: Nancy copes with Tim’s death, horribly.

Reaching, there is nothing left by tiniestmite: A harrowing POV of Tim experiencing his own death.

Grief is a lantern by Pigeonsplotinsecrecy: A follow-up to the mourning montage in 2x02.

Not one or the other by @maxbegone: While honoring a friendship tradition, Nancy processes the traumatic events from the previous months in season 3. There’s a mention of TK’s NDE but it is also half-Tim-centric since he’s the first work friend (as far as canon is concerned) that Nancy had.

Every second chance (that changed its mind on me) by @lire-casander: It’s a nightmare, and the pain from it will still make itself known sometimes. But throughout this interpretation of how Nancy moves forward in season 2, it’s possible to wake up.

[allbridgesburn]

Hello everyone! Some updates, because I know I've been an awful blogger these past few weeks (again, i'm more active on twitter, i recc looking for signs of life over there).

AO3 user GoldenKanekalon wrote a wasteland fic!!!! (i am still not over it, i may continue fangirling over this fact until I'm old and gray). It's a Mallory POV after chapter 8, with a delicious gothic vibe and a messy girl-dad Coriolanus Snow that had me shedding some tears. Please check it out and leave a kind word, because it's truly a GREAT PIECE: Paint the Roses Red by GoldenKanekalon💙 🥹

I've finally started writing chapter 9 (yes, it does seem like my main incentive for writing is audience interaction. who would have THOUGHT). I've had a terrible case of writer's block these past few weeks ngl, but I think I've managed to conquer it for now. It sure feels good to be finally moving forward with the fic!

I'm also almost finished with a oneshot of a Coryo POV of one of the scenes from ch8 (i thought picking through his psychotic brain would help me finally pick up the pen--uh, keyboard, again, and it worked! thank you LOSER!). I might post it this week - probably as a 'sequel' work connected with the main story, as I have some other wasteland related oneshots / codas I'd like to tackle in the future, so it may be a good idea to just keep them all in one place.

To answer the messages I got about abandoning wasteland - I assure you, again, I /am/ going to finish this story. I know it's been a long time. I hate it too. But we will get there, I promise!

And to everyone who's been supportive of this project and who's been listening to me moan about it on twitter and patting my back - thank you! You are the gems that make me want to keep writing 💙