#just relationship advice in general

[sporeclan]

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First moon(s) of 2024!!! WOOO!!!

[aardvaark]

i don’t think we talk enough about how sophie copied her life philosophy from a kenny rogers song lmao. how many times do the leverage team pick her up on trying to pass off song lyrics as advice? or plots of films and books as Definitely Real Anecdotes. like they’re all at the bar telling some scary stories that happened to them and suddenly someone interrupts her like "ohhh fuck you that’s The Cask of Amontillado" and everyone groans. hardison sees parker’s notes from being mentored by sophie and about half of it is (admittedly applicable) paraphrased song lyrics.

[beneathsilverstars]

i feel like there's GOT to be a genre of blog that collects posts that are great blorbotagging bait but i do NOT know how to find that kind of thing

[whynotfabulous]

If there's a piece of relationship advice that I would recommend to avoid conflict, it would be to tell your partner when you're grumpy. Not necessarily when you're upset with them. Just "Hey, I'm grumpy right now for no reason/ x reason." It really is a game changer.

We all get grumpy for no reason and sometimes we take that out on the people we love because they have committed the sin of simply being nearby when we're upset. So just tell them you're feeling grumpy. If they love you, they'll get it.

It prepares them for a not 100% considerate and thoughtful you for a period of time. It can change the context of a statement like "ugh. The dishes aren't done" from "I am upset with you for not doing the dishes" to "I am already grumpy and I just noticed the dishes and am annoyed by their existence." Makes everyone feel better and prevents a conflict that no one really means.

Now, it's not a "get out of being an asshole free" card and it's best to say you're feeling grumpy as soon as you recognize it and not to immediately preceed yelling at someone or use it as an excuse, but I find that telling your partner about your emotional state saves a lot of miscommunication.

[automaticsoulharmony]

I feel like we NEED to discuss this more

[thepoisonroom]

was listening to an advice podcast and a letter writer opened by saying she realized a few years ago that ALL her friendships were Toxic and ended ALL of them and now she wants a "chosen family like the lgbtq community has" my eyebrows shot UP

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

So, if I start reading translations online for chapters, do you think I have to start over from chapter 1, or do you think that knowing changes that were made, I won't lose much if I start from where I last finished in playing in the EN version?

I think EN is mostly the same as JP, but key parts of the experience definitely get left out in EN. It’s fine to just play through the localization if you’re looking to generally understand the story. You don’t need to start from the beginning to follow what’s going on. I suggest reading translations if you have the time for it or just cross referencing them if you sense that something feels “off” in the EN version.

There is no comprehensive compilation of all differences between JP and EN; it would be very difficult to search up and educate yourself on every localization change. However, I encourage you to go out of your way to look into these differences when possible; it’s an interesting study of our cultural differences.

Please also note that there is considerable cut content from episode 5! You’ll need to search up the missing scenes on Youtube for the “full” TWST experience.

See the tags for a surprise—

[wildflowercryptid]

i'd still love to see a farming sim introduce a rival marriage system that let's you influence who gets with who (à la fire emblem awakening or fates' pairing system.) i think a wonderful life would've been a great game to implement that in bc i feel all the marriage candidates could interact with each other in really interesting ways, especially if that marriage system also allowed for same sex relationships.

[nymphoutofwater]

this might be a little silly, but does anyone have any general advice on how to be a better friend to people?

[wawek]

Boundaries are really important to respect unless theyre mine bc mine are really confusing and normal people dont have issues with stuff like that

[wordsandrobots]

Right. Again, not intending this blog to offer advice on the regular but I think a bit of basic analysis guidance is on theme. So:

If a text does not target its criticisms towards the profit motive and private ownership of the means of production, it is not meaningfully critiquing capitalism.

Capitalism is not 'there are rich and poor' or 'greed is bad', or even 'money motivates people to act'. These existed prior to the capitalistic revolution and could very well endure under any successor systems. A text that deals with them alone -- without targeting the way the pursuit of profit *specifically* leads to distorted social priorities (like running healthcare as if it should generate more money than is put in) and how this manifests when things everyone on the planet needs are controlled by individuals -- is not making an effective argument against the economic arrangement currently buggering us all six ways to Sunday.

This is especially important to bear in mind if dire consequences are presented as a result of 'human greed', because doing so abstracts the problem away from its technical causes, which is one of the key ways capitalism diverts attention from its flaws. If the issue is merely people being 'greedy', then we just need to operate with more checks and balances. No need to tackle the core concept of a system geared to maximise profit over everything else . In fact, maybe capitalism is simply an extension of human nature and therefore *can't* be changed. Isn't it comforting, to know this is just what we're like?

(Urgh, what's the keyboard equivalent of washing your mouth out?)

A story isn't doing anything wrong if it does not concern itself with capitalism as a system. Heck, there's not anything wrong with grappling with the question of greed in general, because that is indeed something we need to grapple with: what does it mean, how does it work, how can we best mitigate it and the other worst aspects of ourselves? Many stories do exactly this while clothed in the aesthetics of capitalism and its many, many horrible outcomes.

But aesthetics are not an argument. And getting mad about social inequality and wars ignited by the whims of the rich is not the same as zeroing in on capitalism as the major cause or catalyst. It is in fact quite common to hate all the consequences of private ownership and the profit motive while still believing those things in and of themselves are neutral, normal ways of organising the world. This filters into fiction, producing ultimately toothless attacks on 'big business' or 'corporate greed' or even just the insidious idea that if we put the right people in charge of the system, everything will be OK.

(I cannot think of a better example than the first Iron Man movie, an almost pathologically deflective piece of cinema.)

Take the time to consciously read fiction through a capitalistic lens! Pick apart how it reflects the world at the point the story was written! Ask how the author approaches the issues they raise!

At the same time, avoid crediting them with an argument they aren't making. Identify what they actually say above all else and check it against the definition of the things they evoke. Only then will you be on solid ground to state whether or not they are attacking capitalism.

To beat a favourite drum, words have meaning. That matters quite a lot when talking about the meaning of a story.

This has been me vague-posting at the entire Gundam fandom. You're generally lovely but I do occasionally feel the strong urge to start pelting you with dictionaries, and burying this point in an essay about McGillis Fareed was apparently not enough to sate my need to grumble about it (c.f. section A digression into narratives about capitalism).

Thank you for your time. I shall be standing by the position that Iron-Blooded Orphans is the only solid critique of capitalism the franchise has produced (as a subset of exploring exploitation in general) until further notice.

[xoshepard]

fucking vindication man

my sister was just minding her business in the basement eating breakfast and my stepdad came down and asked "why do you have the light on" and she was like "so i can see?" and the thing about my stepdad is that he's incapable of softening his tone (and will pretend he doesnt understand that his tone is aggressive even though he can understand when YOUR tone is aggressive/rude) so even an innocuous question like that sounds like an attack, so my sister's response was also super subdued and irritated. this isn't the first time an exchange like that has happened but it was the first time that he kinda hesitated and was like "wait what did i just say that upset you?" and she started to speak like she was going to explain, then thought better of it and just said "it's nothing"

LIKE YEAH DUDE. WHEN YOU CREATE AN ENVIRONMENT WHERE PEOPLE FEEL LIKE THEY CONSTANTLY HAVE TO EXPLAIN THEMSELVES TO YOU AND AT THE SAME TIME THEY CAN'T BE COMFORTABLE BRINGING UP THINGS YOUVE DONE OR SAID TO UPSET THEM WITHOUT YOU JUST ARGUING WITH THEM TO JUSTIFY HOW THEYRE WRONG FOR BEING UPSET AND YOUVE NEVER DONE ANYTHING WRONG, THEN PEOPLE ARENT GONNA FUCKIN TALK TO YOU. ITS SO SIMPLE.

[daisyachain]

so Momoe has a mysterious past. Deliberately obscure. Occupies an odd role in the gender-segregated world of sports. Seems to have had a clean break after junior high. Experienced with the medical system. Bonds quickly with Hanai ‘don’t call me Azusa’ Lastnameonly and Tajima ‘I hate tall guys’ Yuuichirou. Mentorship of Hanai carries clear undertones of seeing herself in him.

[vincentspork]

Literally all day yesterday I was brewing thoughts in my mind along the lines of "it's very odd, and long-term, harmful, for us (lgbt people) to insist that our love is deeper, more pure, or genuine than that of cisgender heterosexual people bc it's very presumptuous of how they feel about and navigate their own lives, ntm it completely glosses over toxic relationships that can happen between lgbt people. Not a fan of this" and then my coworker walked up to me and was like Kat, As A Woman - Never Underestimate How Much Your Man Will Appreciate You Making Him A Sandwich! Like girl I was batting for you and then you come and say this corny shit

[vio1315]

I love psychology actually

but doesn’t mean I have to love everything done in that field or even see it as good or ethical

or assume everything done under that label is well thought out

[mejomonster]

Trying to date makes me so sad...