#kill bill sirens fr

[uncriticalbunny]

me whenever I see people desperate for the writers to make sydney asexual and/or a lesbian.

long post ahead.

as a black woman who is ace, I don’t think sydney being asexual would be revolutionary or interesting. it would actually be so incredibly, hugely, profoundly... boringggggg. and people who insist on sydney being asexual get a massive side eye from me. especially white asexuals, because fuck your representation, and cishet people because who the fuck are y’all? 

so rarely are black women in tv and film treated with respect and nuance, much less when it comes to romance. so rarely are we treated as a person to be desired. to be loved. openly. warmly. carnally. even less so when it’s a darkskin black woman. writers pick from one of two things when it comes to black female characters: hypersexualized vs desexualized. superficially, for all outward appearances, there are lots of asexual black women in media. that is to say, they are certainly almost treated that way. unintentionally. intentionally. maliciously. void of sexuality or sensuality. no romance because she’s a Strong Black Woman who doesn’t need a man. or a relationship so pathetic that it can hardly be called a romance. would it be nice to have an asexual black female character who has a storyline that treats asexuality with respect? yes, yes it would. but that’s not really the point of this increasingly wordy essay. if the creators/writers are to be taken at their word that sydcarmy is strictly platonic, and they had her reject marcus because he misread their interactions, then it just shows they’ve developed nothing for sydney romantically. all the shots of carmy looking at her like she hung the moon and the stars are simply because she's his #bro. marcus really only liked her for her personality and simply confused that for romantic longing. platonic connections and a one-sided pursuit with zero heat. how groundbreaking. 

every fucking white character can have all of the romance-related things though. they can kiss each other, be shown as desirable, etc. etc. nat can be cuddled and cherished by pete. richie can go on dates in a nice suit with dirt caked under his nails, be loving with his then-wife, and ostensibly be wanted by jess. tiffany can still be yearned for by her ex-husband as she prepares to marry a new one. carmy can skip around like he’s in a romcom while neglecting his responsibilities to make out with claire and call her beautiful. claire can be shot in soft, dreamy sequences with closeups of her face and have a convo with her ass out for no reason other than to say she’s desirable and fucked carmy. claire and carmy can have screentime set aside for their relationship and a tender lovemaking scene. it’s expected for white people. it’s the norm. no romantic love for sydney though. because she’s driven. because she deserves better. because romance is unimportant. because she wants that star. because she can have no distractions. because asexual. because representation. [audience cheering]

sydney being a lesbian would also bore me immensely. too often are black female characters treated by writers as russian dolls with every diversity point they can think of. books, comics, tv, film, etc. she’s black, she's lesbian, she’s trans, she’s disabled, she’s poor, she’s this, she’s that. the diversity and representation everyone wants. why is every other character surrounding this ~pinnacle of diversity~ straight, or white, or a man? yes, because that’s who’s mainly writing and casting and greenlighting these things and maybe it’s silly to expect otherwise, but still, what the fuck? congrats on being represented by this fictional character. but it doesn’t feel genuine; it feels spiteful and lazy and self-congratulatory. like where's the other black women and diverse characters lmao. to be clear, I do want to see all the black lesbians in media because there's still not very many. and black women with one, or two, or all of those “diversity points” do exist in real life. we are lesbians, we are bi, we are disabled, we are trans. we're all of those and more. and we are loved and adored. on screen? maybe with a nonexistent or poor romantic storyline. or perhaps a decent and maybe even good storyline that eventually crashes and burns. there's a popular twitter thread right now about the disposable black gf trope and the examples that keep pouring in are bleak af.

the black lesbian character headcanon/canon increasingly feels like just another way to fridge us romantically. #notalllesbiantruthers but too many tbh. a black female character will simply exist without uttering a word and a slew of white women will be there to loudly proclaim her as the lesbian representation they want, need, crave, and adore. especially if there’s zero indication of the character being a lesbian. just stereotypes and vibes. hollow, insincere proclamations. bi black women don't even exist in their world. all these things I’ve observed with sydney. she's a bro, she's butch, she's a top, she's so husband-coded. babygirl is only reserved for the most woeful, pitiful white male characters. it's hilariously #coded. and no one will push back because after all, any gay representation is a good thing.

you’ll see hit tweets about how they know deep down sydney's a lesbian or how it will be so funny when the writers make her one. really, why is that? she can't be bi lest she actually gets with carmy. carmy can't be gay because they want to fuck him too badly. yeah I’m not so convinced all the lesbian sydney truthers earnestly want to see her loved, adored, cuddled, kissed, or fucked by another woman. because would that really be the writers’ objective or finished product? or will they just make her a lesbian and pat themselves on the back for doing only that. a throwaway line? maybe give her a cute romance built largely off-screen? lesbian sydney is a win for diversity and that’s enough. and who really wants to see sydney loved on loudly or be sexual anyway? that's not who she really is! she wears minimal makeup and oversized shirts and sweaters. let’s just focus on her working herself to the bone and getting that star. and I think deep down a lot of these truthers know her storyline possibly wouldn't be done justice. that's why it's going to be so funny to them when they make her one.

it all feels so shallow. fanfiction of sydney x fem!reader or original female character or nayia (the gorgiana black chef from s02ep03) is quite literally nonexistent [!!!]. sorry, y'all are not progressive or galaxy-brained. we get a black female character who’s multifaceted and fascinating, a deuteragonist even, in a show with a fandom that barely considers her as a person, and you’ve set your grubby paws upon her to be shelved romantically. bffr, the writers are already flailing romance-wise when it comes to sydney; they would not do an asexual/lesbian storyline justice. and even if they somehow make a halfway decent attempt, maybe they should have made it clear from the very beginning. not in season 3 or 4 or 5 or wheneverthefuck after they’ve given all the white characters romantic angles and developed her strongest and most important relationship with carmy, the main white guy or possibly because they hate the fact that people ship her with the main white guy. because then it just feels reactionary. and spiteful. and lazy. anyway, this ended up being way longer than I wanted. thanks for reading. fin.

[florbelles]

okay. the line “but the judge that was promised had come home at last” RIPS brother. so sexy fr

ugh ty beloved. sorry to joseph for the kill bill sirens

[birdmans]

Come on, Roman. Let's get away from these fucking Jacobins. I've got you. Come on, let's discuss. Hey, Dad, I... I know what he said, I was there, but, um, really, with Matsson calling the shots, we're... we're strung up in the town square.

[ymorii]

google why do i relate to the stinky blue flame man

[musingsofvenus]

Also available on AO3. I update on Fridays!

[olessan-lokenosse]

Flight Rising: [ambiguous teaser in the same format as the gaoler teaser] :)

FR userbase: [positive kill bill sirens]

[airtouched]

     I’m gonna come out and say it--- the fashion in Frozen is a trainwreck when looked at from a historical angle. Absolutely gorgeous designs and beautiful to look at but makes everything a bit fucky timeline wise in trying to figure out the era

[sodrippy]

good lord im really spinning out over this. i just really like my coworkers and all that stuff but right now im fully having a This Is Your Life flashback montage of the past few months and jesus christ yeah a MAJORITY of what i say are funny lines that make fun of whoever im talking to. oh jeez.

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

More shitposts abt Comte bc what else am I really good for

Since I’ve finally recovered from the last event story released for him.....oh my godkhlkjshgkjdshkja the fucking BOSS MUSIC emanating from this man. The absolute possessive insanity throbbing in his skull--it’s killing me!!!! Sir!!!! On what planet!!!! Does a person get jealous over shoes!?!?!?!?

I just. “to bestow you with a gift without consulting me first.” Is where I first heard the Kill Bill Sirens. My god. I was like he’s taking this wel--. He is not taking this well. Abort mission. I--

Fr good luck to that boutique owner I don’t even want to imagine what kind of reprisal is waiting in store for that man. I may be stupid but I’m not an idiot I would never pick a fight with Comte if someone paid me that man does not fight to get even ;;;;;;;;;;; he fights to cripple his opposition forever, holy shit

Anyway framing this one screenshot as I downspiral into Comte-loving madness: 

Oh to be an oblivious fk in love with Comte...

[eyeslikefoxglove]

Episode 11 - The Yunmeng Sibs have shitty parents & *Screams in Doctor*

Hello hello! Long time no talk, who’d thought finishing med school wound not free my schedule up? Not me that’s for sure. Btw I have an iPad case (where I’m watching and writing) that can turn into a stand so the screen is upright. HOWEVER the lower flaps that hold the iPad in the case broke so it just keeps sliding down and giving me heart attacks, you’ll hear me screaming about it further down I’m sure. So enjoy my pain.

This farewell scene is fucking me up tho. Why do you want tears so early in the episode screenwriters? Why? (Also, MY STILL HAS NOT HAD TREATMENT FOR THAT STAB WOUND)

Aw my One Braincell Trio worries about MY is adorable tho (yet another missed opportunity for him to make actual friends who care about him and not end up as JGY)

I’m sorry for the thirst but HOLLY SHIT WANG ZHUOCHENG’S BONE STRUCTURE.

That’s it. I’m going to stop the tv series here when they’re in Lotus Pier and everything is fiiiiine. Btw watching that servant girl run through the place has convinced me that I 100% would trip taking a corner and end up in the lake.

YUNMENG SIIIIIBS

Ok, pause to say: I do think Madame Yu is a BAMF. I also think that’s literally her only redeeming quality. I don’t like Mme Yu and I don’t like JFM and y’all are gonna have to endure my ranting.

This woman is just spoiling for a fight isn’t she?

Ok, the first time I saw this, I was willing to be on her side. My mum does the same thing where she rants when she’s worried and my dad is more phlegmatic (until he snaps then they just scream at each other and I eat popcorn). The instant I decided that she could go hang was when she started being an asshole to her kids. And they just take it, so it is clearly not the first time she’s called her daughter a mildness follower and her son idiot and useless fuuuuck her.

And of course JFM goes and pulls the “man from way back when” misogynistic bullshit and tells her to go rest. Why would he either try to not have this conversation in from of their children or stand up for all of them.

Ok. How did LWJ not get a massive footprint on his PALE BLUE clothes from WZL’s kick?

Also, let me go down the clothes, or rather footwear, rabbit hole for a second. Those fucking boots can’t be comfortable. I know that’s the shape they had and whatever but they don’t move when you walk. My god, I own 12 pairs of Doctor Martens, I did pointe in my ballet class for years, I know a lot about unyielding shoes and I can tell you, that walking without being able to flex you foot is horrendous. How. Why. Am I missing something that’s common knowledge about those boots by virtue of not being Chinese? (And having almost zero knowledge of traditional Chinese clothing)

Alright, back to the show LWJ about to throw hands at WC (not with, WC is too much of a coward).

Yay the butterflies!

My one track mind: *takes note of the fakeness of the fake blood*

Xichen bb noooooo.

Wait wait wait. Assuming the Cloud Recesses siege and the conversation when JFM tells our boys they’re leaving for Nightless City in three days are happening simultaneously that means LWJ fucked off to indoctrination ON A BROKEN LEG. And he got there only a bit before the people from Yunmeng, however Cloud Recesses is further away than Lotus Pier, so he was fucking rushing, ON A BROKEN LEG. Please tell me he was at least wearing plaster under his clothes (no he wasn’t, at least not in the Murder Turtle cave) *Screams in Doctor*

(But FR, don’t pull that kind of bullshit, walking around on a fracture can cause the bone fragments to shift, compress the blood supply to your foot and you can loose it)

Look, this idiot is back. Again, if you see random bouts of screaming is just me not wanting to listen to Su She.

Ok, ok I’ve got a bone to pick here. I’ve seen some people say that Su She cracking and telling the Wens how to get in is less about him being an asshole and more about he not wanting to die. Fair enough, wanting to survive is natural. HOWEVER, my problem with this situation in particular is that, as long as he saved his own skin, he didn’t give a fuck about all the people who were going to get murdered. That’s a dick move.

And before anyone can tell me that’s not how regular people work, my building caught on fire about a year ago, my first instinct after putting my cat in his carrier by a fresh air source was to leave my flame-free flat to go check on my neighbours. I don’t know my neighbours, hell, our relationship consists on them letting their kids scream until past midnight and me blasting death metal at 6am the day after in retaliation. (They were gone for the weekend and both me and the cat were fine, thank fuck for skylights). I know it isn’t the same stakes as being held at swordpoint but, my dude, human decency is human decency.

Su She: people like LWJ look down on us outer disciples.

LWJ: *literally gets his leg broken bc he saved Su She’s life*

My one track mind: where’s the arterial spray?

Every time I seen Yunmeng disciples shooting kites I start hearing Kill Bill sirens.

Speaking of shooting kites. I don’t think JC has ever actually been jealous of WWX like sometimes I’ve seen mentioned. He clearly encourages him to best his shot in front of all the disciples knowing he’ll make it. He’s had his mother’s poison and his father’s indifference poured in his ear since he was a child, if this really was a Thor-Loki/Scar-Mufasa/Cain-Abel brother dynamic those tiny little gestures wouldn’t exist. JC could not give less of a fuck that WWX is “better” than him, it has been, however, used to hurt both of them; and that’s what pisses him off. Not that he’s compared to his brother, but that whoever is doing that comparison explicitly seeks to hurt. Also, knowing that you baby brother (I don’t care WWX is older that JC, he’s the baby in this relationship) is a prodigy, and yet he’s in such deep shit he probably won’t be able to get out, and what can you, not a prodigy, do to help him out? Nothing. That’s terrible, that’s painful and as we all know JC only emotes in anger.

SOMEONE HUG NHS PLEASE HE LOOKS SO SAD.

Oh I’m living for Peacock’s facial expressions.

Ok, listen, listen. That whole scene where WWX turns around, LWJ is looking gorgeous dressed in white, flanked by the two Wen soldiers walking down the aisle to joint the front of the queue reads too much like a Western wedding for my poor heart to not make the connection. Also, LWJ (in white) is walking towards WWX (in black) which is usually the positions and colour schemes of an heterosexual version of those weddings and as much as I say fuck gendering WangXian (ppl calling WWX mother or wife makes me homicidal) you will pry those parallels from my cold dead hands.

I can’t even make fun of the *Bichen grip* because my taciturn bb is so hurt right now.

Thanks for reading!

[zeleniafic]

Bio tag game!

Name: well. I go by Zel usually here BUT my irl name is Callie and LEMME TELL YOU... it’s just uncommon enough that I can count on one hand the number of other Callies I’ve met irl so I never had to get used to hearing it used when NOT in reference to me, and a few people have OCs named Callie now and it absolutely throws me for a loop every single solitary time I see it in a post???? it weirds me out SO MUCH bc I am just not used to it at all. Idk how ppl with really common names do it bc every time I see “Callie” written in reference to anything other than me my brain is just like............... *kill bill sirens* THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE

Gender: female

Height: 5′0

Star sign: Taurus

Sexuality: ahahaha I would also like to know that lmfao I identified as bi for a long time but uhhhh I’m in an ongoing identity crisis over that bc idk anymore so!!!!! I am........ Some Type of Queer (TM)

Hogwarts: Slytherin pride bby hiss hiss. 🐍🖤💚 Pottermore (which is a super shitty test ANYWAY, in my opinion) has sorted me into every house at least once though lolol when I was a kid I took the test and got Hufflepuff, was FURIOUS (sorry y’all I appreciate you now!!), retook it and got Ravenclaw, and then after numerous attempts I googled a cheat sheet to get the house I wanted, which was, of course, Gryffindor. Which... in hindsight, that entire saga was a very Slytherin thing to do, wasn’t it? lmfaoooo

Average sleep: like... 4-5 ish hrs prob

Favorite animal: god I hate this question wolf-horse-fox toss up that’s my final answer sorRY

Tagged by: @a-song-of-quill-and-feather​ thank you!! <3

Current time: 9:38 PM

Blankets you sleep with: uhhh it’s summer and I’m in the south and this house has no AC so currently NONE

Dogs or cats:  B O T H    FINAL  ANSWER

Dream job: astronaut like fr that was my planned-for career goal for a long time until I found out I’m TOO. FUCKING. SHORT. to be a candidate :))))))

When I made my blog: This one last year, but a previous version of it as a sideblog in like 2018 I think? But I’ve been on tumblr in general since like 2011 or 2012 and BOY isn’t that scary

Why I made this: to reblog fanfic/OC related content specifically

Reason for URL: Oh lord. Okay so my name is zeleniafic here because my name on ff.net has been SilverZelenia for the better part of a decade... and the reason behind THAT is a real doozy. The first OC I can remember making was an Inuyasha OC as part of a collaboration with my friend, and her name translated to silver moon (I was 11 pls cut me some slack okay) so when I made my account... I found Zelenia, which means “the moon” in Greek according to the wikipedia baby names list I remember reading back then. So... “Silver Moon” but fancier. I have no idea if that’s accurate now and BOY am I embarrassed by this origin story but I’m a nostalgic ass bitch and I got sappy and chickened out when I went to change it, so. My 6th grade brain will forever haunt me I guess.

Tagging: @lorettastwilight​ and @butcherofblackwater​ if you guys are so inclined! Absolutely no pressure bc I completely understand not wanting to put personal details online LOL