#kind of got them tonight from my gf and my friend

[cantsaythetword]

Also I got a recommended post on insta about how to give back massages and it gave off SERIOUS tword vibes like omg it got to me worse than any gif or video I've seen in ages

[tootiecakes234]

Warnings: cheating Katsuki (not on you tho, but with you, eventual smut next part)

Bakugo’s POV

I hate her. I hate her, yet she’s always around. She’s raccoon eyes’ best friend so that means she at every party, every hang out, and every sleepover. I can’t fucking escape her.

She’s so goddamn annoying. Always starting up conversations with me about shit I don’t care about. She laughs at the shit I say, but I’m not being funny, I’m being deadass serious. And don’t get me started on the way she laughs. She does it with her entire body and it’s loud too. Pisses me off so bad.

She’s a problem for me because the more I hang out with her, the more I can’t stop thinking about her.

I have a girlfriend. A great fucking girlfriend. She’s sweet, too sweet to be dating me, and kind. Probably the most thoughtful person I’ve ever met, so explain to me why when I’m with her and I’m thinking about Y/N. She’s literally invading my waking thoughts as well as my dreams.

I’ve tried distancing myself from her and being more of a jackass hoping she’d get fed up and just leave me the hell alone but nothing works and I’m running out of options.

We were having a movie night at Kaminari’s apartment tonight. I was in the kitchen cooking dinner, by myself, the way I prefer it.

“Heeey. How’s it going Kit Kat”, she was all cheeks and smiles

“I told you to stop fucking calling me that you idiot.”

“But it’s the cutest nickname I can think of. You have any other suggestions??”, she looked at me like she was being serious.

I turned to her, giving her my full attention so she knew I was being serious, “Bakugo. You can call me Bakugo like everybody else.

“Your friends don’t call you Bakugo, they all call you Katsuki.”, the insane woman still had a warm smile sitting on her lips. There was also a really shiny lipgloss on them too. Did it have sparkles in it? Why did her lips look so-

“Hello?? Are you ok?” She started walking towards me.

“I’m fucking fine. I’d be better if you got the hell outta here.”, why the hell was she even in here. “ and yea my friends call me Katsuki, you’re not MY friend. You’re Mina’s friend. Speaking of which don’t you need to get back to her.” The last part came out more grumbled than firm the way I meant it to.

“No, she’s flirting with Eiji rn and I don’t wanna be a third wheel. Well I guess a fourth wheel cuz Denki is third wheeling.” Apparently she thought that was funny because she started chuckling to herself.

Her hair was all wild, framing her face and her cheeks… fuck me I don’t know what it is about her cheeks plumping up when she smiles or laughs.

“Well then go be a fourth wheel or whatever the hell. I’m cooking and I don’t like other people in my kitchen.”

“Your gf usually sits with you in here. Speaking of where is she? I haven’t seen her in forever and we need to catch up . She always gives the best gossip on you.”

“She had other shit to do and what kind of gossip does she tell about me???!”

“ oh nothing really”, she leaned over on the counter and her fucking tits were smooshed in between her arms.

“For the love of god can you please just get the fuck away from me?! How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t like you. I don’t wanna be your shitty friend or listen to whatever the hell it is you constitute as jokes. Just get the fuck out!”, that last part was a hell of a lot louder than I expected it to be.

That’s when the tear fell. What the hell had I done?

She reached up quickly and wiped it away.

“Hey, why are you yelling at her like that you jackass? Y/N are you ok?”, Mina was the first one in the kitchen. And the rest of them followed suit. All asking question I didn’t have answers to.

“You guys I’m fine. Really. We all know how he gets when he’s cooking. Let’s just go back in the living room and let him finish.”, she smiled again but it didn’t reach her eyes. Damn it all to hell I felt like worst person to ever exist.

“Are you sure you’re ok?”, Mina asked her again as everyone started retreating the the living room.

I wasn’t able to hear her answer. I tried to put the whole thing outta my head and finish what I was doing but I couldn’t. It kept replaying in my head.

My phone brought be back to the present. Who the heel was calling me? When I looked down at the contact my girlfriend’s name was sitting there. Perfect fucking timing.

“Hello”

“Hey baby. What are you up to”, she sounded giddy.

“Im finishing up dinner, where are you?”

“On the way back my friends house. We are having a slumber party.”, he words were a little slurred.

“So I guess you guys have already started drinkin.”

“Haha yep.”, I heard someone in the background telling her to get off the phone. No boy calls at girls night. “Well I gotta go doll. My friends are getting upset with me. Love you!”

She hung up before I could even say it back. Women.

I had everything ready to go now, so I went out to tell the idiots it was time to eat.

She was gone.

“Is Y/N in the bathroom or something??”

Mina looked at me like she was ready to murder me, “ no she left. You yelled at her and hurt her feelings and she didn’t wanna stay. We tried to convince her.”

“Yea bro I think she was about to start crying. Why’d you yell at her like that?”, Eijirou said.

“She’s so cool. I don’t know why you don’t like her. You’ve been mean to her since she started hanging out with us.”, Denki chimed in

“Mina send me her address.” I grabbed my keys and started heading for the door.

“Why would I do that when she’s upset with you? You gonna go over there and yell at her some more cuz let me tell you-“

“I’m going to fucking apologize, so just send me the goddamn address.”

I got in my car and started driving. What the hell was I doing? Why am I going over here? I could give a rats ass about hurting someone’s feelings but here I am with my GPS on looking for her apartment building.

I got up to her door and paused because I knew that I should turn around. I knew I should just let the whole thing blow over but like the idiot I am, my hand starts banging on her front door.

I hear muffled through the door, “coming”

She opened the door and looked at my face. Had my foot not been in the door, she would’ve slammed it close.

“Move your foot before I stomp the shit out of it.”

I could feel the smirk pulling at my lips, “these are steal toe boots. I’d like to see you try.”, I told her.

“What do you want Bakugo? Why are you paying unwanted visits to my house? How did you even get my goddamn address?”, she looked disgusted with me. That’s fair. Also didn’t miss that she was calling me by my last name.

“Mina gave me your address. I’m coming to bring your back.”,

Part 2

[eeulysian]

hm enough smut for today, i kinda got tired of it.. sigh, maybe i ate too much. anyhoo, what do u feel about [insert charac] x shy!reader? ^_^ lllike imagine chRCter being all extrovert, party addict, and fun then there's this little lost zoul clinging on the charactwr's arm TT it's be such a cute relationship i swear.

idk what character that would be fit for this role...

reader being shy and possessive after the party (overthinks a lot as well.. im not romanticizing that btw) AKSJDHJEBDHEHEJWHEHU——

“you were talking to them the whole time, u shouldn't have brought me here with u.. they didn't need me there anyway,” tsk. tsk. character ends up cimforting and doing whatever reader wants becuz they neglected them wayy.. too much. (if this even makes sense, im half asleep writing this)🦈🦈🦈🦈 ermm.. im not requesting a fic btw! ur free to make it into one tho. :D

I LOVE THIS TROPE SOO MUCH. its one of my favourite tropes. its like, in terms of animal tropes, it would be golden retriever x black cat. the characters i have in mind for this areeee.... topaz, serval, bai yi, beidou, elysia and kafka. i think all of them would definitely be a perfect fit for this kind of trope. not a fic but just a little short imagine!!

forced to be invited to this rich kid's mansion party by college gf!(char) because she wants to taste the drinks there, eat the food and have fun with other people. you kept refusing at first, because your introverted ass cannot handle crowds. you'd look like a small, crying kitten in the midst of the crowd. you know you'd be pushed here and there, hearing crazy screams and shouting, with rave music in the background and you hated it. in the end, you gave in and was dragged to the mansion by (char). in there was so many people, chatting, laughing, having fun and dancing to the music. (char) saw a friend and ran after them, forgetting you were there with her. 30 minutes passed, you were standing in a corner, a little further from the crowd and you started getting anxious, wondering where she is and why she just left you like that. you decided to just swarm and squiggle into the crowd to find her, feeling your social battery get drained even more. and you spotted her talking with her friend, because her hair color just stood out alot. you ran after her and shyly hugged her from behind, trying to silently tell her that she forgot about you and that you're still here. she flinched a little, but knowing it was you, she gave you an apologetic smile and told her friend that you're her girlfriend in case they were confused.

"y/n, i'm sorry i accidentally left you behind. it wont happen again, i promise", she told you, but you still felt a little insecure that she just... left you like that for a friend. "no it's fine, maybe i shouldn't have been here anyways if i wasn't so important. i don't like parties anyways." you blurted out. she noticed you looked and even sounded sad from that tone, she knew she was going to have to make it up to you with hugs, kisses and snacks when you two get home tonight. she apologizes once again, and tells her friend that she'll be going home earlier to avert her attention more to you. she feels guilty, but she knows you meant no harm and you can't help feeling like that. but she just loves taking care of you and reassuring you anyways, no matter if you guys have huge differences, contrasts and are considered total opposites by others. they say opposites attracts anyways 🤭

[honeys-hotties]

I love your writing omg, I was wondering if you could do like some head cannons about jb dating a singer as big as Taylor swift (and with music similar to hers), maybe even when shes doing a tour like the eras tour

yes yes yes i love this!!! i've been a swiftie forever this is so fun! this is kind of short but i wanted to get something out for you tonight!! xoxo

okay so julien has been a fan for YEARS and thinks you're basically the most incredible singer ever

i'm writing these thinking jb and you got together in like late 2022 early 2023? so she def watched you go through all of the shit with management and watched everyone turn on you and it broke her heart

you had worked with phoebe in the past and knew of lucy and julien but had never met them UNTIL an event you were all at

you guys went to the afterparty together and julien confessed she was such a huge fan of yours

you guys were friends for a while but were hiding feelings and it literally took someone else pointing it out for you to realize

you're both so insanely proud and supportive of each other's careers

awards show dates<3

matches her tie to your dress/outfit!

one million percent writing songs for each other

after everything that you went through she is so SO protective of you

she is as excited as you are for the eras tour and is so in awe of you as she watches the entire world lose its damn mind over you

just so incredibly in awe of you at all times, she is absolutely enamored

she helps you rehearse and choose the setlist for the tour, and helps you choose all of the surprise songs

surprising her with the outfits and her just absolutely losing her damn mind

keeping the vigilante shit choreo a secret from her until the very first performance and poor jb, her eyes are bugging out of her head she can't keep her eyes of you

def gets a little possessive as a joke, like, "babeeee only i get to see you like this"

maybe you do a little one on one show for her to make up for it...

is just obsessed with you and your stage presence

sometimes she can't believe how many people your music affects and she is so incredibly in awe of you and the impact you've had on people across the world

she comes to as many shows as she can and there are SO many videos of her watching you like you hung the moon

munagenius teases her constantly about you, saying she has to share her girlfriend with the rest of the world too

they all love you SO much and you guys are all constantly hyping each other up and promoting each other's music

going to her shows but trying to be discreet

SO many paparazzi photos of you two just being incredibly in love, holding hands, going on walks, all of it

you include her in all of the hints and easter eggs for re releases (rep tv when????) and she loves helping you troll your fans

she has so much respect for everything you've been through and everything you sacrifice to make music

helps you write songs and come up with music

always looking at you with the biggest heart eyes, she tells you all the time she can't believe you chose her and you tell her that YOU'RE the lucky one

lots of affirmations and reassurance

she's just so amazing and in love and now i want to be a taylor level singer with jb as my gf<3

i hope you liked this babe!! let me know if you have any more requests!! love you all with my whole heart

[djljpanda]

Hello May you please write about Wednesday’s shy sweet gf who loves cute things but has a soft spot for her even thought she despises that kind of stuff such as affection and being madly in love ( and added jealousy lol pls 😩🥀💗🖤

No worries.

Wednesday was so protective over you as if someone could just think one thing bad about you Wednesday already planned to dump their body.

Wednesday loved how innocent looking you were and how sweet you are.

It still amazes her on how she grew to love the thing she hated.

But to her displeasure shw isn't the only one who loves you sweet shy charms.

Many students in the school were also in love. Her jealousy grew more during the next dance that was going to happen. Many have tried to ask you out to the dance but you turned them all down with a sorry.

But as the dance was coming closer Wednesday had came up to you during lunch and led you outside where she had started to say that you and her are still going to the dance. "We still are but if you don't it us alright-" "No need to tell me all that nonsense I just had to make sure that you know we are going to the dance". "Well don't worry, we will go together I promise", you had said with a sweet smile in the end.

At the dance you both came in as total opposites you dressed out in pastel pinks and whites while Wednesday was in all black. That whole night you both talked you even got Wednesday to dance with you.

But as the night was close to ending you were getting some punch for you and Wednesday as siren student came up to you asking if you had wanted to head to their dorm after the dance.

"Oh sorry I was gonna go with my girlfriend and her friends after this, sorry" "But are you sure", said the siren student as they started to get pushy. Once you saw they were about to use their ability Wednesday came in taking you away from the scene after sending a death glare towards the siren.

Wednesday had taken you and her into the halls of the school. "Are you alright I saw that filthy siren near you" "No I'm fine dear, really I am" "You have to stop this whole shyness as what if I wasn't there they would have use there siren call on you" "I know and I'm sorry. I promise I'm trying but-".

As you went on tears had started to build up in your eyes. Based on being scared of what the soren could have done, being talked strictly by Wednesday, the felling of being useless and weak, and the fear that one day because of your shyness something bad will happen.

Wednesday notice your tears as she put her hand on your shoulder giving you a signal that you can go in for a hug. You hugged her tightly as tears streamed down your face. "Mi amour you are to cute cry, it is also not your fault this is who you are amd I love you for that but don't feel like your shyness is pushing you back. I'm sorry for making you feel that way" "I forgive you Wednesday but is there anyway you can help me become more confident?" "I will help in anyway you need but don't feel like i'm pushing you to do this" "No but for tonight let's just enjoy this" "Alright" "But we should be going your friends are probably trying to figure out where we are". "They are not my friends" "Really Enid would not like to hear that".

[dizzyjelly]

A Night In

Word Count: 1.9k

Summary: you're at a dinner party with Abby(gf) and her friends when you get your period so you have to leave. You're worried you ruined the night, but Abby reassures and comforts you.

Cw: periods, brief mention of blood, usage of pads, medication(ibuprofen)

You sat at the table with a grimace on your face as you felt an all too familiar sharp, intense cramping in your lower stomach. Letting out a small sigh through your nose, you gripped Abbys forearm from where she sat next to you. She was laughing and chatting with her friends, who had been so kind to invite the two of you to a dinner party tonight.

You tugged at her shirt a bit, and immediately she could tell something was up.

"What's going on, babygirl?" She leaned to your ear to whisper.

"I think I got my period, can you come to the bathroom with me?" You whispered back, feeling embarrassed.

"Yeah, of course." She smiled at you before kissing your forehead, then she stood and held your hand.

"Excuse us for a moment." She announced to her friends, thankfully leaving out your embarrassing details.

She walked you to the bathroom with her hand now finding its place on the small of your back. You got in there and she stood near the door as you sat at the toilet, pulling your tights and underpants down. You groaned as there was a red spot soaking your underwear, throwing your head back in frustration.

"Ugggh. I swear I'm going to die." You complained, clutching your stomach as you felt another wave of intense cramping.

"Hey, it's gonna be ok babygirl. Did you bring anything in your purse, pads or tampons?" She asked as she dug into your black purse on the countertop.

"No... I wasn't supposed to get it for two more days." You admitted, knowing it was probably stupid and you should always have that stuff on you, "God I'm so stupid." You voiced your thoughts.

"What! Don't say such things about my sweet girl. You're not stupid." She immediately contradicted you.

You just smiled, but not for long because you just realized you'd bled through to your tights. They were new as well, you'd gotten them just for tonight. You sighed, putting your elbows onto your knees and dropping your head into your hands with a frown.

"Baaabe my tights. They're ruined." You complained, still not bringing your head back up.

Abby tsked,

"Hey, hey, it's all gonna be fine. I've got some pads in my bag just for emergencies and we'll deal with the tights when we get home. Everything's ok." She reassured you, handing you a pad from her bag.

It was your favorite, go-to brand. She had those in there just for you, you knew this because she used tampons. You muttered a small thank you and put it on before finishing up your business then washing your hands.

"Wait, we're leaving?" You asked, feeling guilty.

"Yeah, I wasn't gonna make you stay and sit in your own blood." She stated as if it was obvious.

"Well, you should stay" You suggested, but Abby shook her head, "come on, I don't wanna make you leave." You held her hands in yours, leaing forward to rest your forehead against hers.

"I don't wanna be here if you're not. The whole point was for you to meet my friends, it'd be silly if I just stayed." She explained, rubbing your hands with her thumbs.

It took you a minute, but you would eventually agree. You felt terrible, her friends were so kind to invite you and the food was delicious. Why did your body have to conspire against you?

"Ok, finee." You spoke reluctantly, still not wanting to make Abby go home with you.

But she would insist, and in the end she'd always win. She just had a way about these things, and you knew she probably wanted to take care of you. The both of you returned to the dining room, everyone was just chatting.

"Hey guys, were gonna head out." Abby told her friends.

"Oh, is everything ok?" Manny asked.

"Yes, everything's fine. We're just not feeling well. I'll see you guys later, yeah?" She gave a small explanation, keeping it vague.

"Uh, thank you guys for inviting us, it was lovely meeting all of you. And your food was amazing." You spoke with a smile, even though you wanted nothing more than to cry.

You said goodbye to everyone, Abby gave a few hugs, but you weren't all that into physical touch with people you didn't really know. Once she was done, you walked out to the car together. Just before you were going to get in, Abby brought her arms around you from behind. She placed light, tender kisses to your neck and collar bone as she hugged you. Then, without a word, you guys got into the car and she began the drive home.

It wasn't too bad, only about fifteen to twenty minutes. During the first few minutes of the ride, you were able to stay calm and collected. Abbys hand rested on your thigh, as it always did whenever you rode passenger seat with her. But after a few minutes passed, you turned away from her to look out the window as you chewed at your thumbnail. You'd only chew your nails if you were feeling anxious or upset, and right now you felt both those things.

While she probably wouldn't ever be angry at you for what happened, you worried Abby might get mad. And you were upset because you still felt bad for making her leave the party. It was a really nice dinner party, and she should've gotten to stay until it was over, even if you didn’t.

Of course, Aby noticed something was off. Just by the way you weren't saying anything, no complaints about your cramps or asking to get food even though you just ate. She got out of the car and walked over to open your door, grabbing your hands and pulling you up and out of the car. Then, she grabbed at the bottom of your thighs and pulled you up so she held you as you walked inside.

"C'mere." She muttered as she picked you up.

You wrapped your legs around her waist and your arms around her neck, nuzzling your face in the crook of her shoulder. It never failed to surprise you at how strong she was, not that you were too heavy, but still. The feeling of her strong biceps around you was always comforting. It didn't take long before you could feel tears streaming down your face and onto her as she opened the front door.

Soothingly, she ran a hand up and down your back as she walked over to the couch, sitting down so that you were on her lap straddling her. She sighed as her brows furrowed. Slowly, she pulled your head from where it lied on her shoulder. She held your face with her hands, rubbing away your tears with her thumbs.

"Babygirl, what's up? Come on, you're too pretty to cry." She gave a small smile, but it was hard since she hated to see you cry.

"I- I just f-feel bad. I r-ruined our whole night." You cried as you stuttered, then dropped your head to Abbys chest as your tears wet her shirt.

"What! Nonsense, our night isn't ruined! Come onn, you know I love a night in. We can watch a movie, cuddle, have snacks... and candy." She rubbed her hand up and down your back again, wanting nothing more than to comfort you.

A small smile crept onto your face, snacks, candy, and cuddling did sound pretty nice. You lifted your head to look at her, and she smiled ten times as big when she saw you were smiling.

"There's my girl!" She exclaimed, bringing her hands to hold your face again before pulling you in for a kiss.

You held her by the back of her neck, the kiss was sweet and lasted rather long. It was only after a minute you pulled away, resting your forehead on hers.

"You promise I didn't ruin it?" You asked, still feeling some guilt.

"Yes, here" She brought her pinky and wrapped it around your own, "pinky promise." She smiled before placing a kiss to the tip of your nose.

"Well, now I know you really mean it." You joked, letting out a small giggle.

Abby laughed as well, her mood shot up instantly when she knew you were ok. And your laugh always made her laugh.

"Why don't you go get changed and I'll go out and get us some snacks. Take some ibuprofen for your cramps." She suggested as she peppered kisses over your cheeks, nose, and chin.

"Mkay. You don't want me to go with you?" You asked.

"Do you wanna come with?" She asked in return.

You shook your head no and she just nodded, pulling you in for a warm embrace before giving you a light peck on the lips then setting you down on the couch next to her. She got up and left, off to get snacks. You went upstairs to your shared bedroom and pulled your dresser open.

You grabbed one of your pairs of granny panties and a t-shirt of Abbys before going into the bathroom. After getting changed, you brought your stained panties and tights to the laundry room and set them on top of the washer. You made a sour face at them, those were really fucking cute tights.

Sighing, you exited the laundry room and made your way to the bathroom. You pulled open the medicine cabinet, grabbing the ibuprofen and taking your usual dosage with some water from the faucet. Then you placed the bottle back, closed the cabinet, and went back to the living room.

You'd brought down your favorite blanket from you and Abbys bed, getting comfy on the couch as you turned the TV on. You browsed a few different streaming services for a movie before you ultimately decided on 10 Things I Hate About You, it was a classic and one of your favorites.

During the ten minutes you waited for Abby to return, you scrolled through pinterest on your phone and checked Instagram a few times. Once she got back, she held two bags full of your favorite candy and snacks as well as some of her own favorites.

She kicked her shoes off then rushed over to sit beside you on the couch, leaning over to place a kiss on your cheek as she set the bags down beside her. You smiled and leaned into her kiss, then lifted up the blanket so she could share it. It wasn't huge so you'd ended up sitting on her lap as she held your waist. She grabbed the bags and dumped them both out onto the couch and your eyes lit up.

Immediately, you reached for your favorite chips and opened the bag before you started munching on them. Abby started the movie before going to town on one of her favorite candies. You let yourself sink into her embrace, enjoying the movie and the snacks. It didn't take long for you to drift off into a peaceful sleep, Abby smiled to herself as your head fell back onto her shoulder, light snoring coming from you.

She'd only watch about five more minutes of the movie before carefully picking you up and carrying you to your bedroom bridal style. She wrapped you up in the blanket, lying you down on the bed before climbing in herself. You slowly stirred awake as she was getting comfortable, you turned to face her.

"Hold me." You whispered, so quiet she almost didn't hear you.

You snuggled into her side and she wrapped her strong arms around you, lightly playing with your hair with one of her hands as the other sat at the small of your back. You sighed contently, your head resting on her chest as you held her with your own arms. They weren't as strong, but they were just as loving. You both would fall asleep shortly after.

[ilovetulips]

saw ur reqs are open n i was wondering if u could write s1/2 steve just spoiling his gf?? hes kind of like an accidental sugar daddy😭

steve harrington x fem!reader

its an average day in hawkins, not too warm or too cold. well, as average as this town could get after having an inter-dimensional leak into the confines of the town. however, now there is more reason for the ‘gang’ to actually become friends — despite one member being more than just your friend already.

steve harrington waits around the corner from your locker, eyes patiently scanning the rusted door and looking up every time it releases a god-awful screech. he knew how the whole ‘battle with the demo-dogs’ had affected you, how the loss of bob had affected you, and he wanted to make you feel special. you were his girlfriend after-all, and you were so very special.

as steve continued with his patient waiting, occasionally waving and smiling lightly at people who’d greeted him, you had finally stepped through the doors. you didn’t look like you belong in a solemn place like this. you were a beacon of light, a beacon of hope for dear old steve harrington. your hips swayed in your skirt, juxtaposing your stiff arms placed rigidly around your folder; ensuring it wouldn’t be dropped at all.

your plan was unsuccessful, however, when your boyfriend grabbed your waist as you opened your locker and hoisted you up into the air. “steve! for fucks sake my heart just dropped.” you screamed, hand clutching your chest as you lean down towards your folder on the floor. the small skirt revealing too much to the people watching in the halls for steve’s liking, stepping behind you and holding your hips to make sure what is his, stays his. he ensures that nobody can look up your skirt while he stands behind you.

“well g’morning to you too, sweetheart. really gave me a wake-up call there with that voice of yours.” he smirks, that famous slanted posture his lips take shape into that everyone knows.

you smack his shoulder playfully. “well maybe if you weren’t such a lovesick douche, i wouldn’t be so scared to walk around and shout at anyone who tries it on, now would i?” you pout up at him slightly, him meeting your face and placing a comforting kiss to your plush lips. it made your head spin, it was such a delicate kiss yet so passionate in the sense of familiarity and solace.

“haven’t even seen the gift i got you yet, and you’re suckin’ my face already? maybe you’re the lovesick one.” he mumbles against your lips, pressing one final peck before leaning backwards with his arms crossed upon the locker next to yours.

“gift? what’re you on about?” you say staring at him with furrowed brows, not focusing on pulling out your necessary books for the day until the hard feelings of their spines were replaced by soft layers of… petals?

you spin your head towards the locker itself, overflowing with bouquets upon bouquets of red roses, petals spilling out upon the floor and slowly dancing in the small breeze that flittered through the halls after being invited in from that damned rusty door. you don’t even know how to react other than a sharp gasp, and hands flying to your mouth.

the noise had made people grow curious, a gathering forming in the hall around you two as whispers grew. “that’s so romantic…” “why don’t you do that for me?” “he’s so sappy… harrington’s gone soft.” yet the sound of them only entered your ears as white noise, the only thing in your focus was your boyfriends face; flushed with a light pink blush from all the attention and small tugs at the corners of his lips.

“steve! you shouldn’t—“

“hey. none of that, ‘kay? wanted to spoil my girl after everything. and if you think this is all i have for you, you have some preparations to be doing doll. got dinner at your favourite diner tonight, and more presents sittin’ in my car. want to show you how much i love you.”

you grab his face, and smoosh his soft cheeks in your hands before kissing every inch of his face. his nose, forehead, even eyelids. everywhere and then finally focusing in on your favourite part of it all. his kiss tasted of mint gum and cherry chapstick, a combination strong enough to leave a tingle on your lips when you pull away. “i love you, harrington. my favourite boy forever, thank you so much. don’t even know what to say.”

“don’t have to say anything, sweetheart. jus’ let me spoil you.” he holds your hip as he guides you down the hall slowly.

“you’re like my sugar daddy yaknow?”

“watch that mouth pretty girl, you’re pushin’ it now.” he says as he clutches your waist, walking you down the hallway towards your next class before kissing your forehead goodbye.

[wooziorgans]

fic updates!!

hi gang uh. it’s been a while, so here’s a full list of things that are currently in progress.

please let me know if there are any works that should be prioritized!! I think suck it and see is gonna be first up. no set dates quite yet but,,, that ones short so I’ll probably just drop it unannounced. also most of these are nsfw works. so mdni.

ALSO MY REQUESTS ARE OPEN FOR SMALL THINGS. PLEASE FEEL FREE TO SEND THEM IN!!!

BULLET POINT IDEAS:

if u saw me reblog a post by @sunshinedeekay , you’ll definitely have seen some of these ideas in their post. it’s not plagerism, we talked abt these ideas together, and my take on them is veryyyyyy woozi centric cus hes the loml.

TTT - couples retreat

joining jihoon and the rest of the members and their partners in a ttt episode of gose

campfire (woozi centric)

sitting around a campfire with svt because it’s that time of year.

grocery store au (woozi centric)

svt members position working at a grocery store.

manager jihoon having such a soft spot for the students working for him.

bss fucking around and breaking a jar of pickles.

SHORTER WORKS:

suck it and see - bf!jihoon x reader

summary: all jihoon had was a simple meeting. the problem is, he looks a little too good in his button up.

warnings: (recently) established relationship. first time together in any sexual way. oral (m. receiving). woozi in a white button-up with his sleeves rolled up. wonwoo and mingyu are kinda?? idk how to explain it but you’ll see. chan has a gf n she’s just kinda there. possessive (but in a healthy?? way?) jihoon. a little throat fucking. hair pulling.

“Y/N,” Jihoon hisses. Y/N whines softly as his grip on their waist tightens. “Angel, I think we should head out.” He says softly, still trying to hold his composure. If there was one thing he wasn’t about to do, it was pop a boner in a room full of his friends. He’d never hear the end of it. But the way Y/N sat so nicely on his lap, with their ass rubbing against his cock every time they moved— god, it was so hard to keep his hormones in check.

It wasn’t like they hadn’t talked about sex before. They had, multiple times, when make out sessions got a little too heated and Jihoon was left hard as a rock. The relationship was a little too new for them to ever get farther than feeling each other up. It was a very hard line that Y/N chose to draw in the sand, and Jihoon respected it. Something about tonight was different.

Y/N’s grip on his forearm tightened, thumb brushing against the fabric that had been rolled up. “Am I making you uncomfortable?” They ask quietly, answer given before it’s even verbalized in the way his thumb circles their hip.

“No, god, never. But I’m thinking about things that would get me put on a watch list so that I don’t… y’know.” Jihoon presses a soft kiss to the base of their neck. “I just don’t want to be like this around the guys.” He laughs, but it’s strained. Just like how the fabric of his pants has started to feel. Y/N shifts again to test the water, and boy, is it tested.

when? - geto!woozi x ex jujutsu sorcerer!reader

summary: it’s been ten years since jihoon was banished from jujutsu tech. it’s been ten years since he slaughtered an entire village at the age of seventeen. it’s been ten years since y/n last saw him.

warmings: angst. hurt/comfort. jujutsu kaisen au. kind of post-breakup au. a little bit of a soulmate au if you squint. mega jujustu kaisen spoilers. woozi as geto. long haired woozi. mentions of massacring a village (if you’re familiar w jjk you know what im talking about). unresolved issues. unrequited love (kinda?). attempted murder kinda. hoshi as gojo. dialogue heavy.

The deep swell of the clouds overhead black out the sky. They swirl, angry, as they weep. A storm is brewing deep within them. The low rumble of thunder shakes the apartment building. Tonight is a night full of pain for the sky.

It’s equally as painful for Y/N.

The sharp knock on the door this late into the evening disturbs them. Y/N holds the cup of tea they were in the middle of making as they walk towards to door.

It’s most likely a solicitor, but to be out in this weather? They must be desperate. The knocks sound again; they must be really desperate. “One second!” Y/N calls, walking the few feet to the door. They swing it open forcefully, pissed off as the knocks echo once again.

Lee Jihoon stands on the other side of it. He looks older now. Out of reflex and shock, Y/N moves to slam the door closed. Jihoon slides a foot into the crack. He winces as it slams into the side of his shoe.

“Can I come in?” He’s beaten to all hell. Scratches cover parts of Jihoon’s face and arms, the blood flowing out of them mixed with the rain. He’s soaked, shivering softly with hair stuck to his forehead.

Y/N nearly drops their cup of tea, hand tightening around the door handle. It shakes as they pull it open more. “Um, yeah. I guess.” Jihoon slips inside, feet tracking in water. He’s considerate enough to slip his shoes off, but his socks are equally as wet.

lunch - seokmin x reader

summary: listening to an album with y/n’s boyfriend unlocks something in him. something almost dangerous for seokmin, and the best possible thing for y/n.

or, seokmin wants to be a better boyfriend. he’s fine as is, but it doesn’t hurt to start taking his partner out to lunch and craving a second course once they’re at home.

no teaser available at the moment but…. u get the idea.

drown - wonwoo x reader

summary: wonwoo wants to help his best friend; he really does. but things are so much harder to understand with a heavy heart of his own. so y/n explains what’s going on in terms he’ll get.

tags: angst, hurt/comfort, best friends to ???. mentions of others drinking (specifically chan. this is not an accurate representation of how i see chan, i love him). brief mentions of reader n chan in a rlly complicated situation ship. stress, feelings of depression, etc. just both of em going through a rlly hard time :((( reader n wonwoo r passing a vape back n forth throughout this.

“Woo,” Y/N exhales, pulling the blanket over their chest, “I don’t even know what to say.” They lay their head on his chest, closing their eyes softly. They try to push back the tears, but the pressure is overwhelming.

“It’s okay. Take your time.” Wonwoo coos, wrapping his arm tighter around their shoulders.

“I just— I feel so stupid for even thinking that I had a chance.” They exhale slowly. “Like, I can never be first place against someone who doesn’t even care about him.” The tears they had been holding back for the last ten minutes slowly begin to fall as they open their eyes again.

Immediately, Wonwoo knows what Y/N is talking about. Their over complicated situation-ship had been a heavy topic that hung in the air for most of the last week. Wonwoo knew as soon as he entered the apartment that something was off. When the soft, hesitant knocks bounced off his door into his room, he knew.

He opened his door; to the soft call of his name from a shaking voice, and eyes that seemed to be brimming with tears. His body moved to usher Y/N into his room, to bring them to his bed and tuck them in as they both leaned against the headboard and held each other.

“Chan’s on the phone,” Y/N said flatly, face burning red as they struggled to speak.

“I know,” Wonwoo whispered into the air.

“With her.” They closed their eyes, suddenly hyper aware of their own heart beat.

“I know.” Wonwoo sighed, arm wrapping around their shoulders. He hated this; this look of pity on Y/N’s face, their eyes so wet from holding it together. The hesitance in their voice; something Wonwoo never heard in it. They were always so confident, so optimistic. It was gone entirely.

FULL LENGTH FICS:

abstract - idol!jihoon x reader

professor lee is a fantastic teacher. above all, he is a knowledgeable old man who is incredibly passionate about his job and his students. he enjoys dancing, bad karaoke, eating lunch with his students, writing with expensive pens, teaching and talking about his family. and he is about to give his last class, not because he’s retiring, but because he’s terminal. he doesn’t expect to make it to the end of the semester. y/n loves the philosophy class taught by professor lee. this year’s class is different. this year, the students enrolled in professor lee’s philosophy classes will learn about life and death, but the most important lesson y/n learned comes in the form of their professors son; jihoon.

current warning list: gn!reader. afab!reader. implied bi!reader. very brief reader x female oc. college stuff (academics, drinking, jihoon smokes cigarettes). mentions of issues with food/not eating. major character death. homophobia, heartbreak, life lessons. philosophy talk. grieving. hella hurt/comfort. this has a happy ending i swear.

The earth seems very far away. Wherever the two of them are right now, home seems so far away. It’s a very small dot compared to the rest of the vast and dark universe. Whatever is here, it shares the darkness and the emptiness of the vacuum of space. Whether it was a moment of total dissociation, or just shock, nothing seems quite real to Jihoon. The room is no longer spinning, but it feels just as fuzzy. His eyes feel bleary and heavy from crying, which he has also stopped doing. He watches from the front porch as his father is carried into the back of a hearse, Y/N held tightly to his side.

It’s cold, and the sun has begun to set. The glow of the afternoon is long gone. His mother and cousin are almost nonexistent in this moment. The only thing that really grounds him to the earth is the warmth of Y/N’s body inside his jacket. Their arms are crossed to keep the heat in. Jihoon tightens his hold on their bare arm.

It’s beautiful, he recognizes. The clouds are deep shades of purple; it’s an unusual occurrence for this time of year. ‘It’s just like him,’ He thinks, ‘to pick the most beautiful day to die.’ The hearse drives off and no one moves. No one speaks. The wind has even seemed to stop blowing; the earth has gone completely silent.

end of beginning - fbi agent!jihoon x detective!reader

summary: decorated detective Lee Jihoon transfers to the NYPD to catch yet another deranged serial killer. The only difference this time is his set of colleagues, and his unbridled hatred for one of them.

warnings: jun is dead as hell in this fic (he was readers old partner n died in a shootout) I am so sorry for this one seriously oh my god. if it’s any consolation, it’s only talked about n he doesn’t die during the fic. GRAPHIC depictions of violence, murder, bodily mutilation, getting shot; generally pls just be aware that this is a fic abt chasing down a serial killer in new york. woozi is such an asshole in the first little bit of this fic but he has his reasons. enemies to lovers. coworkers to lovers. ANGST. smut. fluff.

“You want me as an equal? Then start doing half the fucking work!” He snapped. God, how easy it would be to draw their gun right now and take him down a peg, Y/N thought. The intrusiveness of the thought made their body run cold.

Sure, Jihoon has always been an asshole, but shooting him? I’m getting far too invested in this. Y/N thought again, swallowing harshly. They let out a shaky breath, deciding to not say anything to counter him. This profile was hard. It had been two months, with five separate incidents and they had nothing.

“What? Nothing? Have I finally gotten you to shut up?” Jihoon sneered, a smirk falling onto his face. Any chance at silencing themselves was gone now.

“I really, really fucking hate your guts Lee. If it wasn’t for this fucking case I would happily never see you again. You’re self-centred and cocky, and frankly, you’ve contributed fuck all to this investigation. We’re two months in, both of us of the two most decorated detectives in North America. We have nothing. Don’t you dare fucking lecture me about putting in the work when the stakes are so high.” Y/N’s hands gripped their hair, pulling it harshly as they paced to the other side of the room. “I’m not about to lose another partner, not again.” It sounded like a sob.

“Feelings mutual.” Jihoon states, pushing open the glass door of the room and leaving. He swallows harshly as he exits, running a hand through his hair in frustration. He’d gone too far, and for the very first time, his argument with Y/N had left him with a sour taste in his mouth and the all too familiar feeling of guilt in his stomach.

when we’re both thirty - producer!jihoon x reader

summary: after writing a contract while drunk in college that detailed if both parties were still single by the time they were thirty they would get married, jihoon and y/n forget about it. nine years and one divorce later, jihoon finds himself on y/n’s doorstep begging for forgiveness and a place to stay. the only issue is, he realizes his feelings four years too late.

current warnings: so much angst. unrequited love. friends to strangers to ??? to ???? to lovers. four years of silence from jihoon. broken heart syndrome. reader struggling hardcore w depression after the unofficial official breakup. bss bestie shenanigans. hoshi is the mvp here. hoshi calls jihoons ex wife a whore at one point. (more to be determined. this one is still in the beginning stages)

“I’m taking Y/N home.” Soonyoung pats his friend on the shoulder twice. Jihoon’s mouth falls open softly, a look of confusion on his face.

“Why? Is everything okay?” He can’t help but worry, despite his new bride glaring at the concern on his face. “Are they okay?” Soonyoung nods curtly.

“Um, they just don’t feel well. They’re in my car right now.” It wasn’t a complete lie, but the tears they had been holding back all night were getting closer and closer to spilling. The last thing Y/N wanted was to be accused of ruining Jihoon’s wedding by crying.

He was still their best friend after all. Even if being in love with him felt like getting their heart ripped out through their throat, it was still his big day. Even if Seokmin had to calm them down in the bathroom, the family bathroom, and they received strange looks from the group of strangers who saw both of them exit it, it was Jihoon’s day. Y/N wanted nothing more than for this day to be a happy one, to be the last day where they could say they loved him.

But things didn’t work out like that.

All it did was twist the knife deeper, puncture holes in their lungs that made it impossible to breathe.

pride and dignity - idol!jihoon x male!soloist!reader

summary: jihoon’s managed to keep his private life out of the media for the last ten years. however, his first ever scandal is a dating scandal; and even worse, one with another man. with the mistake of going out for drinks and getting a little too touchy, jihoon has to navigate all of the speculation on his sexuality, and his growing feelings for the other person caught in the middle of it all.

warnings: m!reader, but i use they/them for reader in this fic bcs it’s easier to distinguish reader from woozi that way. i grew up writing gay fan fiction, i am using they/them for reader out of pure convenience to keep my shit straight. hoshi n lee soohyuk r together. woozi is gay. he likes men in this bad boy. dating scandal. mild homophobia. lots of sex talk. this is really just porn with a lot of plot. plot with a little porn??? idk. this is so angsty my lord. woozi is a TEASE in this oh dear. a little dialogue heavy in some places. soft n tender woozi makes his return!!. reader has a little bit of anxiety. did i mention angst. angst. pledis statements. that’s a warning in and of itself.

Jihoon’s heart beats wildly in his chest as he stares at his phone. The photos of them that were leaked looked incredibly intimate. Jihoon’s arm is wrapped around Y/N’s waist, a tender smile on his lips. He looks like he’s in love. He was just drunk.

Still, the soft expression on his face is noted in the headline of the article. Woozi and Y/N Entangled in Gangnam. Jihoon feels sick.

Entangled. That they most certainly were. This is what he was afraid of: his personal life intertwining with his professional career.

The call from his manager comes soon after. Jihoon sinks into his couch as his manager rambles on about how detrimental this scandal could be to his career. Jihoon knows. He knows better than anyone what this could mean for not only him but Y/N.

Y/N’s in a much worse position; they said it themselves, being gay is a death sentence in the K-Pop industry. Especially when you’re new to it.

“I can confirm that the person in the photos is Y/N. As for the circumstances surrounding the photos, I won’t comment on any rumours or speculation. All I can say is that Y/N and I remain committed to our work and professional relationship moving forward.” Jihoon keeps his words calculated and careful as his manager asks for an official statement. Pledis was taking a new approach with this scandal, and hearing from the source was what they deemed best.

He had no idea how Y/N’s company would handle it. Jihoon only hoped that they wouldn’t be too hard on them.

But he knows.

He knows any way it’s dealt with will hurt Y/N’s career. Jihoon feels like he’s going to throw up.

statute of limitations - criminal defense lawyer/single dad!seokmin x neighbour!reader

summary: getting a new neighbour is always an experience. getting a hot single dad right across the hall I n even better experience.

tags: jeongcheol canonically. lawyer/roommate!jeonghan, mentions of wack crimes/assault (cus they’re lawyers). more tags to be added here as well.

“Hi.” He smiles, opening the door wide enough for Y/N to step into his apartment. “What brings you here at this hour?” His smile is still so bright, despite the fatigue on his face and the hour of the day.

“Sorry.” Y/N looks down. “I needed to get way from Jeonghan for a bit. Is it okay if I come in for a bit? I promise I won’t keep you up much longer.” Y/N looks back up at him, smiling softly, eyebrows raised slightly to make their eyes look bigger.

“Course,”

“I seriously thought about strangling him. He just gets on nerves about certain things and it’s so—“ Seokmin laughs.

“I’m not too sure if you should be confessing your violent impulses to a criminal defence lawyer, angel.” He coos, setting the glasses onto coasters on his coffee table. He grabs his glasses from the table, slipping them onto his face before he finally leans back onto the couch. There’s very little space between the two of them.

how do you talk to a star? - PREQUEL TO HOW TO KILL THE SUN

summary and tags are a work in progress so here is a little teaser.

Ah, yes. The origins of the nickname angel.

Jihoon was babysitting once again as the rest of his friends drank. The booth in the bar was crammed full of people, most of them eating half as much as they drank. It was one of the rare times he had agreed to go out without being forced; this making it a cause for celebration.

“You’ll babysit me, right?” Soonyoung asked, an hour earlier when he wasn’t drunk. Jihoon huffed, nodding reluctantly. He rolled his eyes, not exactly happy to spend his Friday night watching Soonyoung cry in another alcohol induced breakdown.

A gentle pat to his thigh pulls him out of his dissociation. “You okay?” Y/N asks, nursing another glass of god knows what. He looks up from the table to them. He hums softly.

“Mm, yeah. Just spaced out a bit.” He laughs quietly, thought it sounds a little forced.

“You sure? You’ve been spacing out a lot recently.” Y/N rests their hand on his thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze. Jihoon’s heart swells a little at the action. Most people leave him to his own devices in situations like this. They let him deal with the overstimulation on his own. Y/N? Y/N’s a little different when it comes to these things.

“Yeah. Just a little tired.” His hand slides over Y/N’s, giving it a soft squeeze.

“If you want, I’m sure no one would be upset if we left.” Y/N starts, brushing the fabric of his jeans in an attempt to soothe him. It works.

“No. You’re having a good time; I’m just a little spaced out but I’m fine here.” He gives a small smile to them as they rest their head against his shoulder. It was definitely the alcohol in Y/N’s system that made such an action so easy for them.

role model is also on this list. i got extraordinarily busy and didn’t end up finishing it on time, and life kinda got busy and i couldn’t write anything happy for a while but i swear i will finish it!

these won’t be out for a while, I think this is my fic plan for the rest of the year tbh. but if anyone has any suggestions or requests for something shorter that they want to see, again, please feel free to send them in!!!

[jennyandvastraflint]

Xena Reactions S2Ep12

A TWO PARTER

"I think you should stop punishing yourself for what happened" AHHHH This sounds like it'll be an episode that'll make me cry

"Now it's full of beauty and life, the same kind of change has happened to you" AHHHH, THE LESBIANISM

Gabrielle waits 😭

Uh oh she's having PTSD flashbacks

"Why?" ough

OH NO IS GABRIELLE GONE D:

NOOOOOO

Uh oh.

Yay they're all free again. Runnn

"Wait stop I think I heard Xena"

THE ONE KID SNEAKING AWAY

I think I've said it before but a lot of the villainised characters are pretty racist caricatures...

NOOO XENA GOT HIT

GABRIELLE. HE Hurt her...

Oh god this is really gay. "Wake up. Wake up." If I had a nickel for every-

GABRIELLE STROKING HER CHEEK

Xena my poor babygirl 😭 She's BADLY injured

Ten years earlier...

Oh she was ruthless. Kinda sexy of her tho. I love morally complex characters

A roman nobleman sdjdhs

Can this shit stop insulting the guy.

CAESAR SJFJSBD 23 KNIVES

They're so gay, poor Gabrielle is so worried about her gf

Damn they're skied. Knocking everyone out. Does Xena learn the bloodflow stopping from them

Oh definitely. They're HECKING skilled

Oh wow. She's GORGEOUS. And amazing

Oh this woman as the same symbol on her necklace as the kid from the village

Oh they still have Caesar with them

Yeah I 100% understand why you'd stab this guy 23 times.

She'll eat with him and probably tell him to teach her Gaelic

AHAHA SHE TRIED TO BREAK OUT

Xena is in awe of this woman

Xena on her knees begging? For a beautiful woman? 👀

Okay ngl this is kinda homoerotic...

UM. XENA.

"Where did you steal that dress" sjdhdbd Caesar is an ace bi guy in my head.

Is Xena trying to seduce Caesar

Aha. A kiss.

He'll use her won't he

Dolphins! Sea psychopaths!

OOOH SHE'S STILL THERE. AND SINGING. BEAUTIFUL

"It's Caesar" oh she knows he's no good.

Damn. Night shots where you can actually see something. Wish media today would do that...

I called it

"This is my destiny" oh piss off

Ew. Disgusting.

"Among my conquered" oh go see a therapist you arrogant piece of shit

ARE THEY TRYING TO CRUCIFY HER

Nah this is fucked up... What the actual fuck. All the soldiers

"Break her legs" WTFFFFF

Her friend is gonna save her

Nice winter shots

GABRIELLE!!!

SHE'S SO EXHAUSTED POOR GIRL

THERE SHE GOESSSS I love this woman.

I fucking hate Caesar...

She takes her to a healer

THE SAME HEALERRRR

"Let me go" absolutely not

M'Lina <3

ARGHHHH I'M NOT CRYING YOU ARE

"You I can do something about" T_T Xena can't DIE

"You had no reason to save me but you did"

NO NONOOOOO!!!! M'LINA I LOVED YOU :(((

Oh they unleashed her...

"SHE CAN'T BE GONE"

A new Xena's born tonight 👀

THE CUT BETWEEN THE TWO

"WAKE UP" NOOOOO MY POOR GABRIELLE

Is her soul leaving :(

"When the living think of the dead they can hear their thoughts"

NOOOO SHE HEARS GABRIELLE AND ONLY GABRIELLE

"This world needs you. I need you" I'm not sobbing you are

[vinhteer]

Hummingbird (by Metro Boomin and James Blake) kind of sounds like a Funalec song (delusional)

(basically me OVERANALYSING a song about gw/n and mil/es from spderverse and spinning it into a silly Funalec song)

(I'm also censoring the names and all because I don't want this post to appear under the movie's hashtags. This means I won't clutter them with this long ass essay)

[ACROSS/INTO THE SPDERVERSE SPOILERS]

for context, since this song was written for the movie: from what I understand, it's about gwn's and mles' relationship; it also gets very literal bc this song is played when gwn opens the portal to mles' universe.

"In here, paper walls are

Pushin' back on you like

Eventually you push through

The moment that you realise"

So to briefly summarise the song, it's about wanting to feel connected to this girl whom the singer feels comforted by; "love is unconditional''. The singer feels full of life with them, and it goes on. From what I see it's about mles wanting to see people who understand him as much as his friends do. They're all spider-people, and they all long to be understood. It's a normal human thing to do.

But if we spin it Funalec style, I think it could work especially if we take this song from Alec's standpoint. We actually don't get a lot of Alec content in the canon but mc's fanfic did succhhhh a good job at developing his character; I talked about that in one of my posts (can't be bothered rn), but to summarise it: Alec, like Yumi, never got the love he deserved as a child and thus has to work through life without any of it. He doesn't get the purpose of love and decides that it isn't for him. It didn't work with his family, his friend, his first gf (winking at Emcee)… So why would it work, suddenly? Incoming Funneh banging at his door. Let's get to the actual song:

The song starts with a filtered version extract of the song "Tonight You Belong To Me" by Patience & Prudence. I headcanon Yumi to LOVE romantic songs from the 60s so this 100% works. I can imagine Yumi playing this silly song (/lh) all the time and Alec gets sick of it. Every time he hears it, the track reminds him of Yumi freaking out and getting angry over some random girl at 3AM. In Hummingbird the sample fades away, like it's flying over Alec's head. The sample could symbolize Yumi to him, which just means that he's slowly prioritizing what he wants (being with Funneh and his friends).

"Hummingbird, summer song"

Throughout the song, the singer calls this person a hummingbird, and relates this track to summer. I always found Funneh x Alec to have summer vibes since you kind of relate this season with happiness? It's also the period in which the sun is the most active; so nature gets a lot of energy from it to support life etc !! Also, hummingbirds symbolize (from what I've seen on the internet) in indigenous cultures a messenger of joy. So you could say that Funneh is Alec's hummingbird (?). And maybe Funneh represents summer to him?

"Has it brought my life back?

Hangin' in the balance

Have you brought the light back?"

Before Alec found his friends (Funneh, Kyran and Gold), his life consisted of getting a quick buck from our GENEROUS murderous neighbour Yumi, taking care of his sister and trying to stay afloat. But when he met them, they balanced out the good things and the bad things in his life ("Hangin' in the balance"). It made him actually enjoy things in life; wanting things, needing things, enjoying things... ("Have you brought the light back?")

"Pen pal on a night shift

She's who I get away with

Realising she might

Be all I need in this life"

You could say that... Funneh is his pen pal ig? THROUGH... TEXT? They don't meet very often in canon but they still hit it off every time.

"When I saw a cold snap

I wasn't with the season

Tag was on the ankle"

"When I saw a cold snap" Being without his friend just feels extremely cold and devoid of life (especially with Yumi). He isn't with the season (summer in this case) because he always has to get away from Funneh and his friends.

Also, to bring back the idea that he's prioritizing his needs over being Yumi's henchman, the cold snap could symbolize he needs to remind himself that he is still tied to Yumi.

"Tag was on the ankle"; Well this could mean 2 things.

1. an ankle tag is "an electronic device that is fastened around the ankle of a person who has committed a crime, so that the police know where that person is". This line could mean that he already know what his fate is.

The previous verse could also add another layer; his friends are truly the only place where he gets to be happy, because he knows that he already threw away his life and his future.

2. The tag on the ankle could just be a leash because he's deeply tied with Yumi. It also kind of fits bc the 2 previous lines are (imo) about his situation with Yumi and his life.

"And hummingbird

I know that's our time (That's our time)"

"I know that's our time" It sounds like he's about to leave? Like they're having a nice moment but he can't stay for too long. Flashback to the moments this mf had to leave his friends bc of Yumi (AKA THE OCEAN METAL CONCERT).

"But stay on

Stay on, stay on with me

And hummingbird

I can never unsee

What you've shown me

Stay on, stay on with me"

More pining. He wants Funneh to hold on to him, because he needs her in his life and she showed him so many things; what love means, what life has to offer, having wants, having needs...

Also, the chorus starts at "and humming bird..." to "stay on with me.". It is sung multiple times in the track; he loves her, but he can't stay for long. And this cycle happens SO many times.

"The moment when you realise

There's someone there that needs you

Lap band on the feelings

I tax them for no reason"

Imma be honest. I don't know what's up with the lap band and THE "taxing them" but I'm going to speculate anyway. A lap band is an inflatable silicone device placed around an area of the stomach to treat obesity by slowing down the consumption of food and thus the amount of food consumed. So if you're putting them on "feelings", it's to filter said emotions to slow down said sensations; which means you basically have a hard time processing your feelings to the point that you need a metaphorical device to nullify it? And then there's this line "The moment when you realise / There's someone there that needs you" with "I tax [the aforementioned feelings] for no reason". Alec is taxing these emotions; so he's feeling heavily burdened by these feelings to the point that he's demanding some kind of compensation. He is scared that Funneh (and his friends) need him. He is now important to them. He can't back down anymore; he can't leave, because it'll hurt them. ("The moment when you realise / There's someone there that needs you")

"I added love 'cause love is unconditional

I count on love, I count on love

'Cause love is unconditional within reason"

This line contradicts my ideas for the previous verse but whatever. I guess you could say he both finds these feelings burdening but he also cherishes it and finds it important. AND LAST THING!! Alec didn't get love, but now he does; he knows that love is unconditional within reason thanks to Funneh (and his friends but this is abt her). He counts on love, it sounds corny but it's truly what drives him to keep going in his life!

"Would I sign up again?

Would I sign up again?"

You could interpret these lines as Alec hesitating on whether or not he should continue hanging out with his friends again, since well... He can't back down anymore, since it'll hurt him and Funneh, Gold and Kyran as well. Also I love how the beat here sounds like irregular heart beats OR slowed-down flying hummingbird sounds (a fluttering heart and a bird fluttering their wings).

"And the night was so strong

Forget the time like life is long

Wings beating a thousand strong"

The last two lines really shows that time is very relative. Time feels fast when you're with loved ones, but in the moment, it feels slow. It's the juxtaposition of wanting to stay with someone forever and the wing flapping of a bird LMAO (hummingbirds flutter their wings 80 times per second).

"Would I sign up again?

Would I sign up again?

And the night was so strong

Forget the time like life is long

Wings beating a thousand strong"

So the singer (Alec... in this case?) sings this verse twice, like he is contemplating on his choices as he's spending time with his friends. For the 2nd time though, he sings this:

"Unconditional within reason"

This line calls back to the fact that he deems love to be unconditional. So this could mean that based on his choices, he decides to stay with her. With his friends. IG THIS IS THE GOOD ENDING LMAO IDK IF WE WOULD HAVE GOTTEN THAT IF YHS WAS STILL RUNNING BUT YK....

Anyways, this is all I have to say. Someone should teach me how to analyse an art piece without sounding like I've had a stroke writing it.

Overall, this song really captured Alec's character in my opinion; From being dragged by Yumi since age 12 or so, learning what love is and tip-toeing between running away from the things he loves and staying with his friends.

[summonerluna]

❄️| 🌈 | ☔

Putting this under a cut because it's long!

❄️Share a snippet from a WIP of your choosing.

From a New Orleans-style Irvine fic I started awhile ago. Vampires, Selvine angst, and GF lore with my love of the NoLA aesthetic mixed in.

It’s easy to get lost in this town. The streets are filled with more people than cars, people whooping with joy mixed with shouts from anger and intoxication. On the corner is a busker, trumpet blaring out Estharii jazz, and he can hear a group of kids playing plastic tub drums one street over. Music drifts in and out of shops, and the balconies lining the street are filled with people in restaurants or homes, commercialism and community and excess and poverty blending seamlessly in this place of old world architecture and new world technology. 

Rinoa leads them into a small cafe and Irvine buys her the promised coffee, and she takes his hand when they walk back onto the street. 

It’s comfortable, with Rinoa. 

They have always been the outcasts, after all. The ones with their memories, the ones without SeeD. In the early days, when everyone was still at B-Garden and they were in the hazy afterglow of the war, she got it into her head that she was going to make everyone the ham and cheese sandwiches Deling City is famous for; stuffed with horrible smelling cheese and smothered in some kind of sauce Irvine could never remember. And it would have been good—Rinoa was a surprisingly good cook—except Balamb’s markets were not exactly known for the rich ingredients most Galbadian cooking required. The result may not have been recognizable in their hometown, but Irvine appreciated her efforts nonetheless. He hadn’t realized he was homesick until he walked into the guest dorm she was staying in and was immediately hit with the smell of the countless food trucks he walked past every day during breaks from Garden. 

That was the first night he knew that SeeD was not for him. 

It was also the first night with Selphie, when he walked her back to her dorm, like he always did, but this time she invited him in. 

Now, he and Rinoa walk the ancient city streets, wandering in and out of shops, laughing at the overly commercialized attempts to profit off of the city’s sorceress legacy. Rinoa finds it amusing, the number of people crowding in, hoping to buy charms or spell bags, to take some of the Old City magic home with them, without realizing a genuine sorceress is standing right beside them. Irvine thinks they should really mess with people—that she should set some crystals aglow, or throw a little wind into the rafters and get the chimes and bells ringing, but stops when a dark look crosses her face, and she reminds him that not everyone is here to tap into their own magic; there are plenty who think they’ll be the ones to find a true witch and take her for ransom. 

Hours pass. It’s dark, and Irvine is tired, and they make their way to the waterfront. Rinoa is on her third coffee since leaving the restaurant, ice melting in a cut sitting beside her where she lays with her head in his lap, so fully engrossed in her book he thinks she has forgotten he’s even there. Irvine drinks a cocktail from a styrofoam cup and just watches the water, listening to the wind in the moss hanging from the massive oak above them. He is half asleep when Squall and Selphie finally return. He can’t get a read on them, can’t tell if their mission was a success or not. Squall looks tired. Selphie looks bored. Rinoa stands up and runs to Squall, and Irvine feels that same twist in his stomach he felt at dinner when Squall leaned in to kiss her. 

Selphie drops into his lap before he tries to stand, and he pushes the pangs of jealousy away, switching to a laugh instead, asking obvious questions he knows she can’t answer, and playfully kissing her neck while she laughs. 

“They’re leaving tonight,” she says, nodding towards their friends. “Squall needs to get back to Balamb. Think we should order room service on his account in the morning?” 

“Why wait until morning?” Irvine grins. “You never got to finish your dessert, after all.” 

“Is that a euphemism, Mr. Kinneas?” 

He winks and kisses her and starts to think that maybe Rinoa is right. Maybe it’s not silly to ask her to move. Maybe... 

🌈 Share something soft/fluffy from your WIP

Y'all know I don't really do soft and fluffy so this one is a bit of a challenge! But gonna go with a LoZ thing I'm working on:

When Link comes back to the fire, he crouches beside her instead of sitting, and she immediately recognizes the look he gets when he wants to ask something, and is arguing with himself over whether or not he should.

“What is it?” she prompts, smiling at him. 

“Do you want to go for a walk? It doesn’t have to be far. I know it’s late.” 

It isn’t that late of course, but she appreciates his concern for her stamina. “Yes,” she says. “I think I can manage a walk.” 

He stands up and extends a hand to help her to her feet. She shivers again as the blanket slips from her shoulders, and the ground has grown cold while she sat–and slept–beside the now-dying fire. Link catches the blanket before it falls and adjusts it so it covers her again, and she is once again acutely aware of how close he is. 

“Here,” he picks up her cup of tea and hands it to her, and takes a couple of steps, waiting for her to follow. 

He leads her around the small paddock set up for Saria, along the edge of the cliff that drops down into the creek. It’s dark, and more than once she worries she won’t see the edge of the cliff before she walks off of it. Link of course, won’t let her; it’s clear he knows the terrain with or without light. He reaches for her at one point, his fingers taking hers and steering her to walk beside him opposite the drop, and it’s a gesture so familiar, something they repeated so many times before, and she wonders again if this is something he remembers, or if the years and trauma between them still aren’t as strong as this natural pull to help each other.

“There,” he says, coming to a stop, and she stands beside him. Their hands are still touching, a couple of fingers interlocked. She can only just see the outline of his face in the distant glow of lights coming from his house, and he is looking out into a greater sea of blackness, at…

“Luminous stones!” she cries. Bright green and blue lights, most of them so far away, dot the valley otherwise hidden in darkness. “There’s so many of them! Oh, they’re beautiful.” 

She counts them, three here, two there, trying to gauge how far away they are. Certainly too far to get to tonight, but maybe soon…? She wonders if he remembers how excited she got, whenever they were traveling late enough to see the glowing stones. Is that why he wanted to show her? Or does he just enjoy coming out here to look, and thought she might as well? 

☔Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it?

The first long fic I ever started trying to write for VIII, was a post-game thing that ultimately formed a lot of my headcanons, but never made it past a bunch of scattered chapters, many of which later got frankensteined into things I have written since. But some of the main points from it were:

-A strong focus on Seifer and Rinoa, and their opposing post-game journeys. He ended the game a villain and her a hero, but mostly the fact that his dream had always been to be a Sorceress' Knight--they had been a couple, and in pursuit of his dream his lost her and then she became the sorceress, and Squall got everything Seifer wanted without even trying (in Seifer's mind).

-A big theme for me with Rinoa is that she left a life of privilege to fight for the oppressed, and then she ended up inheriting these powers that in recent history have only been used FOR oppression. Squall can't entirely see how hard this is for her, because he just sees her, and it can be a point of conflict between them (ironically he is the one guilty of almost toxic positivity, though it's mostly rooted in his fear of losing her)

-In contrast, Seifer is in need of a redemption arc, and this results in him being the only person Rinoa can confide in, because he's the only other person (save for Edea but the only person her age) who has had Ultimecia in his head, and really understands her terror. So he and Rinoa end up with this cross-fade between them, as Seifer moves away from his role and she doesn't exactly sink down, but she struggles and it causes problems for her.

Other things I wanted to include:

-At one point Squall assigns a blind contract to Irvine, and it turns out the contract is an assassination hit on Rinoa. Irvine "forgets" to block the sun from reflecting off his sights so Squall has a chance to react and blocks the shot (but is injured). It creates obvious tension between them, and sends Squall into a slight panic of realizing how easily that could happen again, and what the future of Garden and SeeD is, playing on his "I used to keep myself isolated because people might leave me and now I have people I care about and have to try and control everything I can so they don't die" struggle.

-Wimbly Donner is somehow involved because it's funny

-This fic also was where my Seifer/Ellone ship first came from, since Seifer first shows up after Squall is shot in the assassination attempt, where he has been in Esthar with Ellone and Laguna, and includes a scene that is VERY clear in my mind of Squall having a Ross Gellar "WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY SISTER" moment when he realizes Seifer and Ellone have gotten together.

A lot of these ideas have turned into other things, and there are some scenes I wrote that I really like and may eventually just share them as scraps. This story also taught me a lot about myself as a writer, and how I am just not someone who writes plot-driven stories. This story was way too much plot! I like character interactions and dreamy descriptions of place, and just couldn't figure out how to get my writing style to work with this many moving pieces.

[shin-thalia]

The Five Nights at Freddy's movie.

Holy SHIT!!!!!

I saw it on Thursday, and rewatched it with friends just tonight.. I can safely say EVERY SINGLE THING I HOPED AND PRAYED FOR IN 2015/2016 WAS IN THIS MOVIE AND MORE

I genuinely could not be more satisfied with it aside from them adding a power-outage Toreador bit.

SPOILERS BELOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!

!!

!

Holy holy fucking shit in hell I was waiting and hoping for a Springlock Scene in any capacity outside the original minigame for EIGHT YEARS. And I finally got it. In a FNAF MOVIE.. played by Matthew Lillard.

Genuinely peak cinema. The credits of the living tombstone's fnaf song made me almost weep, followed up by THE MUSIC BOX with SAVETHEM minigame audio... except now it reads C O M E. F I N D. M E.

Come find me?? Overlayed on the puppet's music box?? With a BALLOON BOY JUMPSCARE post credit scene?? The THIRD APPEARANCE of him in the film???

Genuinely I love it so much I gotta analyze some things quickly.

1. The hole which the Cupcake bit into Afton's suit directly creates the gut-window we see in the games

2. When Spring Bonnie himself shows up, the INSANELY BADASS theme rises four times. Four main kids, plus GF.

The four rises of the music are replaced by a quiet stringed instrument, which is a polar opposite to how the Missing Children act. Four quiet individuals and a talkative fifth, contrasted by four loud crescendos and a quiet followup mediator before the Fazbear's Motif kicks in again. Because Afton's influence makes the kids act the opposite of how they usually would. His presence drives the usually kind spirits to madness and gives him total control to manipulate them horribly its so GOOD

TO SUMMARIZE- I love this movie with my whole heart and it's absolutely everything I could have ever wanted from a Five Nights at Freddy's film.

Also William Afton is incredibly badass as Spring Bonnie. My 8 years of loving his character design, and almost daily routine of roleplaying as him at recess in third grade have both culminated in finally seeing my favorite character from the franchise in action before suffering the violent mutilation I've been hyping up in my mind for almost a decade.

Remember... he always comes back.

[queenofbrooklyn]

ok my thoughts from this episode which was kind of filler imo

- I need spencer to go away, I’m sorry but I wouldn’t mind him if I thought he genuinely just wanted to just be Alice’s friend but it’s clear he likes her and frequently acts like his gf doesn’t exist and you’re right they’ve made Nick so darn likable that I have no interest in any other love interest

- I love del but she’s a horrible liar 😭 with the note, I’m thinking maybe colton? was involved in something shady or he thought he had a lead regarding Jacob that didn’t pan out. idk but I did notice him getting a beer when arguing with del so more crumbs to add to my theory of him possibly being drunk at the time of his car accident

- I hope season 2 will focus more on the white witch stuff so we can kind of understand the why behind all this. is the time traveling a Landry thing? is it that the pond chooses people? also I hope we see some stuff from the early 1900s and I’d love to explore the future as well

- with the Nick and Alice stuff, I was thinking the only way something could happen is if her future self were to come to the present. Obviously Alice can’t stay in the past long term but the future hasn’t happened yet so maybe her future self could come to the present. Also I wonder if her bringing the hook back to the present would possibly cause an issue. maybe it would make nick recognize her or something in the present? Since in my head, I was thinking all this time that nobody was really clearly remembering Alice and what she looked like. Like their memories of her were fuzzy

- elliot and kat… idk how I feel about that. I’m not the biggest fan of friends to lovers but I’m interested to see what the writers do with them.

- I agree with your hope that maybe jacobs anniversary will bring some more answers (and probably questions 😭) if Jacob were to appear as having time-traveled, would you rather it be young Jacob or an older version?

(I lost this in my drafts I’m so sorry)

Okay yes, Spencer is starting to get on my nerves. At first I really thought he was just trying to be nice and help Alice fit in, but this episode’s interactions were clearly more than that. What about Zoey?? Does she mean nothing? Like I know we haven’t seen her that often but it doesn’t make me like Spencer to see him pushing her off in favor for Alice. I don’t know if they just wrote themselves into a hole and accidentally made Nick too likeable? I think they must have a plan but if it’s substituting Spencer for Nick I’m going to be really mad lololol

I bet you’re right about Colton and the drunk driving. I was SO sad that he apparently was cheating on Del but I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised there was going to be more to his accident/the disintegrating of their family.

I ALSO hope season 2 will go further back and figure out some white witch stuff. Right now I think it’s Landrys only that can travel, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they pond picks specific people. I keep thinking Del is going to time travel but I suppose she’s only a Landry by marriage, so if it’s a family line, it might not apply to her…

So I’m banking on Nick being in tonight’s episode. I’m pretty sure it’s all going to hit the fan tonight. I LOVE what you said about the hook though. I think it would be so smart if that broke something, cause I don’t think she’s brought anything back that isn’t hers before. I don’t know what would be worse, Nick not recognizing Alice and it just breaking her heart, OR Nick recognizing her and it kind of ruining everything. I’m GUESSING that Nick will recognize her and she’ll have to say something like “I’m not Alice. Alice was my mom. I’m ….. somebody”.

As far as Elliot and Kat, I didn’t really ship it before the last episode. It was the scene of them singing in the car that got me. I’ll be happy if they end up together but I’m not pining for it yet. He’s better than Brady though haha.

I’ve been really on the fence about the whole age thing when it comes to Jacob. I think both options are kind of devastating in their own way. If he comes back as a nine year old- that’ll cause major trauma. His dad is dead, his mom is like 60, Kat is older, his best friend is unrecognizable. Only Alice would look the same, and he only knew her for one summer. That would HURT. So right now I’m thinking they’ll go older, but I kinda wish we could deal with the fallout of him coming back as a kid.

Thanks for sending your thoughts friend and I can’t wait to see what happens tonight! (I actually can’t watch until tomorrow so I’ll live blog some then but I hope you enjoy it tonight!!)

[lovecolibri]

SaL anon here a bit early bestie, ostensibly to wish us luck for tonight's LS episode which will finally give us a Grace storyline but is tragically coupled with yet another Owen's sex life storyline which I could not give a fuck about and OMG last night's episode was SO FUCKING GOOD!! Finally we were fed well with the Chim content, and he really did get to shine. Pairing him with Ravi, getting him to be the one to push Ravi back out there the way Bobby kind of did for him, I loved every second. We even got spoiled with some Buckley-Han family crumbs that were absolutely adorable!! Loved seeing Bobby desperately looking for criticism from his team and every one of them just noping out (again LOVED Chim finally giving in at the end with the "why don't you just tell us?!!"). I did appreciate that if they are determined to do this whole Nathaniel thing they're following through, though I'm a little 😒 at the way it was shoved in at the end). And God the Eddie "dating" stuff was so much better than I was expecting (ignoring the utter and complete lack of setup). Ryan's face the entire time was just priceless, if these aren't choices on his part like what are his scene notes?? Eddie looks at Buck *look like you're Cinderella and the prince just asked you to dance*. Eddie looks at or talks about a date *look somewhere between panicked and like you have an ulcer*. We'll see how this goes since there's not much season left but at least for this episode I had fun. We got, at least for one glorious episode all the firefam feels and I'm taking the win!! Maybe even with a song...

Oh yeah, uh, good luck watching LS (guess I should have saved the scene muting comment for this episode and Owen) 🍷🍷🍷!!!

Yes yes, very excited about Grace as always, and Owen is...whatever. Though the compressions on the frozen guy could at least be interesting for emergency related fun stuff.

ANYWAY, HOW ABOUT THAT EPISODE LAST NIGHT?!?!?! The TVFanatic review was absolutely spot on with my issues in regards to Eddie's storyline, as well as wondering if it will ultimately turn out well, but it was SO much better than I was prepared for. And while the message of "Eddie has no gf and therefore MUST be lonely" that was being pushed on him was very 😒 it was shown to absolutely be coming from a place of love. (Eddie is the favorite grandson and nephew, you cannot change my mind.) Ryan's choices have been very...loud, not just in his scenes with Buck but how he's approaching this whole dating thing so we'll see how it turns out! (Maybe we'll get lucky and they'll cut the Folger's girl stuff? It's never too late to manifest!)

The Bobby stuff this episode was EXACTLY the kind of fun firefam stuff we needed while still serving a purpose, and it really felt like old times, and it was so good seeing Maddie back at work even briefly. And I know some people found it cringy but I too could not help but sing along if I heard music so 🤷🏻‍♀️ I get it, kid! I think the Nathaniel stuff will probably end fine, but again we have another bungled set up that really just needed a touch of tweaking but at least we got a Hen/Athena talk out of it!

Every. Single. Second. of the Ravi and Chim stuff was RIVETING and felt so much like home. It was so so so good and I petition for Kenny to have more storylines and do more interviews! I am sooooo happy to have Ravi back home again (even if they could have given a crumb or two instead of erasing him from the show for almost a whole season and bringing him back with no warning), and I'm excited to see how the big emergency in the finale plays out.

Cheers friend, and I can't wait to hear what song you've got for us!

[elytrafemme]

uhm 👉🏽👈🏽 so okay uHHH number 10 and 60 ( my question is: what’s something positive that’s happened to u recently :D )

10. Do you friends or family know about your Blog?

So one of my IRL friends, my best friend of like fuck it must be 7 or so years by now maybe 6 probably something like that, follows this blog but xe is literally never on tumblr so xe has not seen any of my inane ramblings. I should text xem I'll do that in a sec

Aside from that my GF knows that I have a blog but I havent said the URL so when we want to send tumblr posts to each other we just take shitty photos of our laptop screens so its all pixelated and shit then text one another

everyone else no no no no NO aboslutely NOT

60. What's something positive that's happened to you recently?

hm. huh. well I wrote a lot of words for CS today which was really nice and yeah I had other shit to do but the amount I wrote means I'm pretty much clear from having to stress about CS for at least a few days so I'll have time to do other stuff. so that was pretty lovely.

i dunno dude. I think everything is positive pretty much. I've been in a weird space bc being slightly off physically kind of does that to you, at least to me, no matter how frequent it happens I sitll get thrown off when I'm physically unwell. but like. there are birds outside and lovely songs to listen to and I was on a VC with some friends yesterday and I got to just listen to them tell stories and I really love when people tell stories. and my mom folded up a pair of linen pants I really like when I threw them off yesterday presumably delirious and my sister helped me open up a box of pudding and my mutual texted me a link to a really beautiful play. and it was sunny this morning and it might be sunny tomorrow but if it isn't than the flowers will be full of water and keep living. I haven't given up on learning the guitar yet. mother just came in to tell me what pain meds to take tonight

anyway point being. I dunno how to answer that because it doesn't always feel like something strongly positive has stuck out to me but like everything is positive. the shitty things are negative obviously but there is positive stuff in every corner. and there's only shitty stuff sometimes. and the positive stuff doesn't go away when it gets shitty. so no matter how apathetic I get there's a lot

sorry this is a very philosophical answer I dunno I just have difficulty naming one positive thing that's happened. I've been thinking about how much I love my friends and how painful and lovely that is it's like breathing you know? maybe that's my no. 1 positive thing. I guess I just hope they know and maybe they don't yet but either way it's good. we'll all get there eventually.

also extra positive thing but you've said like just a few days ago you were a bit intimidated interacting but you've been in my asks a LOT and that's been really nice so that's extra good. one of my favorite things in the world. when people see me as the circus clown fool i am and are less afraid. i dunno I think you're cool I think the world is cool we should all go to a river and skip some stones Im very bad at that though.

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary239

5/13/24

monday

home from my trip!

i'll talk more about it tomorrow. i met a friend from online!! she was awesome, and i met her housemate who turns out to be my gf's old friend from gaia online!! they were awesome too. really good to meet them, and we traveled with my friends which was nice but also stressful and i feel bad for them because 2 of them seemed rather anxious and depressed the whole time and stuff and idk what to do about that, or how to help anyone, is what i feel sometimes.

the friend i have from online, though, one crazy thing is she knows so many people and things, people i didn't expect her to know, like a person i know specifically, super funny stuff to me.

anyway, the trip only having one whole day in la, it wasn't really enough time i think. i would have liked to have been there longer, because honestly it's been a few days since i've really gotten what feels like good sleep, from work to the trip, the days of parties. guh.

i need to send the pics i've taken of myself/otherwise and see what i want to/can post here, there's some selfies from a few days ago i want to put up and stuff, but that'll have to wait.

i listened to a good chunk of the album tonight also, and i like it! basically i still need to get the treble down a little, remove sibilance from my vocals in places, and then do some stuff to the drums, mess with guitar eqs in places (basically wherever, honestly) and turn a couple tracks up. otherwise it's in a very good place.

this is a short entry cuz i do have to sleep to go to work tomorrow for 7.5 hours. how horrible of them. i am leaving soon though. terrible terrible.

i am, oddly, really excited tomorrow to listen to the music i want to listen to, it's been a bit since i've really had the ability. i kind of want to run through some hardcore/grindy/pv-y screamo stuff. and then idk, the spazzy post hardcore stuff.

this is finally clicking, just really enjoying the vocals this go around.

i will talk more about the trip tomorrow maybe, i think, possibly. it's not like it was a very eventful 3 days honestly. i liked seeing the landscape on the drive, we got to see redondo beach which was interesting for me. i loved seeing the sea creatures in their tanks, waiting to die sadly, some obviously unwell like this lobster i saw. i walked up to a pelican and it made a funny noise, it clapped its beak at me!! i felt ugly the whole time though. work makes me feel ugly, hard to keep to my rather strange routines i guess. but it's just unfun to feel ugly meeting new people, thinking about looking ugly, bad impressions, whatever.

anyway, i need to sleep now/soon, so:

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!