#league of legends reaction

[bewitchedleague]

How would Jhin, Pyke, Yone, Sett, Thresh, Kayn and Viego react to you feeling insecure?

    There was no such thing as insecurity to him. What could you possibly be insecure about? His muse. His whole museum. No, there must be something - someone, tainting your image of yourself. In his twisted mind, he would think, perhaps he hasn't worshiped you enough, or paid enough attention to his surroundings to the point someone had gotten close enough to hurt you this way. Jhin would obsess over you, reminding you that every curve of your body was pure art - obsess about your house, there must not have a single thing in that damned place to make you question your worth. With his mask pressed against the side of your head and arms around your figure, a familiar humming soon was escaping Jhin, his soft song bringing you comfort. He will make sure you knew your worth, one way or another.

"Flaws? There are no such things when it comes to you. Can't you see, darling? You're my greatest achievement, no one, not even you - is allowed to say otherwise."

    Insecurity? Pyke would hum at your words, mind working to think of what to do. This wasn't a everyday situation, and while your presence was also fairly new, he was completely lost about this. For the most part of his undead life, all that he would ever think was about his list - all the names, all the killing. This whole... feeling thing, was rather confusing. Pyke would approach you slowly, almost as if scared of further elevating your anxiety, and he would ask you how could he help you, if there was anything he could do for you. Once you tell him, he'll know by heart and you won't need to tell him again - he works with experience, and the more he comforts you, the better he gets at it.

"How... can I help you? D-don't look at me like that! I'm just trying to... figure out how to make you feel better..."

    Almost as if he had done this already for you, Yone would be a master at comforting whatever doubts and fears your mind would be stressing about. His experience in being a older brother to Yasuo made him very accustomed to anxiety and mood swings, as he was always there to try and help his brother with whatever he was dealing with. Yone would give you a soft kiss on the forehead and pull you into his arms while simultaneously whispering just the right words you needed to hear - whatever you wanted, if it was in his power, would be yours. Gentle touches combined with sweet words, the perfect medicine for your troubles, what else would you really want?

"My love, whatever troubles your mind, I wish to help you in any way I can. Please, what can I do for you?"

    With a laugh and a tap on your back he would say something along the lines of 'what a good joke'. Once he realizes the tears on your eyes and the disappointment mixed in, probably because of his reaction, Sett's ears instantly perk up. How could you feel insecure? Someone so pretty such as yourself? Would embrace you in his arms, almost suffocating you from how tight he'd be holding you. A quieter lover when it comes to these types of situations, depending heavily on physical affection to get his words across. Head pats and small groans to remind you he's there and listening to whatever you have to say, or your quiet sobs. A quiet apology about his behavior at first would fall from his lips quickly, voice quivering like he was afraid that his demeanor by itself further upset you.

"... I'm here, I'm here, okay?"

    As sadistic as your lover could be, he had an undeniable and overwhelming soft spot for you. There was nothing in Thresh's mind but to keep you away from any harm, any pain that this forsaken and cursed world was capable of. The warden would be by your side in no time, wiping those tears off your cheeks with his clawed fingers - softly, and gentle as if you were made of glass. Would have his lantern show you the happy times of his imprisoned victims to try and cheer you up, any story you wanted could be played by his lantern. With a hand on your back, would slowly pull you to him - the coldness of his body creating a nice contrast to your hot face. His deep voice whispering sweet, seductive words of comfort, making you wonder just how many souls had he reassured before cruelly taking their life.

"There is nothing to fear. I'm your protector, I will not let anything happen to you or to us. I'll damn any soul that tries to get in between us."

    Now, don’t get too sad when Kayn awkwardly inches close to you and simply sits next to you. All his life he was trained as a child warrior, everything he knows about is related to war, so his whole body is tense on this situation as he keeps you company - gets even more tense when you lean on him or hug him, slowly calming himself down and hugging you back. Tries to remember the times he was in this situation and you reassured him, decides he’s going to do everything. Heats you a hot bath, cooks you something simple, puts petals in the bathtub - all while Rhaast murmurs how annoyingly irritating human relations and emotions are. Kayn ignores every single word from Rhaast, knowing whatever you’re going through he had to help you with it, as your lover, he wanted to be someone you could trust without fears.

“How... unnecessary is this. Surely they know how to deal with this themselves.”

          “My love... I made you a bath! There are also some snacks in there, if you want I could join you and I’ll let you do whatever you want with my hair!”

          “Ugh, humans...”

    The King himself could not understand where your anxiety came from, but he didn’t necessarily care. In his eyes, this was a test to prove to you just how devoted and loyal he was - and he would do an excellent job at doing so. Anything you wanted, would be yours. While kneeling in front of you, he would ask you to assign him a duty that would make you feel better. If he discovers this anxiety and your pretty tears were caused by a third-party, there will be no tomorrow for them if you allow him to take vengeance in your name. Now, your lover would not argue if all you wanted to do was have him embrace you and whisper sweet nothings in your ear to calm you down. Viego is a devoted man, he will not leave your side until you’re back to normal.

“Anything you wish for, it’s yours. So please, give me purpose and allow me to give you something that will make you feel better. Anything.”

Do not copy or translate my works.

[v33-art]

memories of another life

[chaiteahd]

@Hafoeuvre Via Twitter

https://x.com/hafoeuvre/status/1786090423200457188?s=46&t=vEP_Wh-oIj3-WaJvtMkB7A

This is way too good to not be in Tumblr

[gregrulzok]

Rewarching Arcane and man, I'd totally forgotten that the only reason Jayce is alive is because Viktor actually deadass 100% non ironically pulled a "Nooooo don't kill yourself you're so sexy aha"

And then proceeded to insult him into developing feelings, apparently

[leggo-my-aego]

MY HONEST REACTIONS TO THE **HEARTSTEEL BOYS** PLAYLISTS FROM SOMEONE WHO HAS BARELY CONSUMED LoL CONTENT (PART 1/2)

note: i am SO sorry if i accidentally mischaracterize but these r my opinions based on VIBES i get from the media ive consumed of these 2D men

note2: will NOT be rating cuz music is SUBJECTIVE and i love ALL OF THEM (k`sante has my fav songs of everyone tho 🫶)

Aphelios 💙

>the description is so cute w him just monologuing ab going on a walk with his sister 😭 like sir, this isnt twt but thnk you bbg

>THIS MAN IS ME WHEN I WAS IN MY INDIE/TECHNO ERA LOWK

>like deadass think hed be the type to listen to vaporwave/those mixes of songs w homer simpson high in the background (plz ppl know what im talking about) or like Slow Dancing in the Dark by Joji, idk

>gives the vibe of being out at night w headphones on; in your own world; surrounded by the city environment (neon lights and multiple cars passing by). getting off of work from a late shift and taking your time getting home cuz you wanna enjoy the commute alone

>definitely had a soundcloud before he had a spotify and still is active on it

>also seems like he'd def vibe to video game music from like persona 5 or smn

>also also everyone stream the fanmade song Lost in Silence by Marcus Skeen, its out on spotify!!!

> Personal Song Reccs based off this playlist💙:

• Breathe - Dahlia Sleeps

• rock + roll - EDEN

• Time to Heal - Slowtide, Idune Nicoline

Ezreal 💚

>this man is GAY, sorry dont make the rules. literally has Conan Gray and Troye Sivan in his playlist (I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE), may aswell add mitski 🙄

>rlly tho, Washing Machine Heart started playing after this and i didnt even question if it was part of the playlist

>anyways, very good vibes!! would def be a playlist id have playing in the bg if i was just hanging out in the living room or in the car with friends

>would give aux for a sing a long kind of ride where we're too engrossed in karaoke to pay attention to the road and accidentally start speeding down the lanes c:

>also someone equated him to baby-justin bieber kind of famous in this world and i can only think of howd he would definitely be unironically listening to that song as a guilty pleasure or Taylor Swift, idk

> Personal Song Reccs based off this playlist💚:

• God of Music - SEVENTEEN

• NO SZNS - Jean Dawson, SZA

• summer - keshi

K'Sante 💛

>UNDERRATED PLAYLIST, WHY DOES HE HAVE THE LEAST LIKES OF EVERYONE ???

>no notes, has my fav kinds of vibes of RnB and hiphop. like yes. ily k'sante 🫶

>this is what i listen to at night to keep me motivated with my work, very good vibes if you listen to ppl like UMI or SZA

>like omg will i get high and just chill in the house listening to this.. currently have it low on speaker with just my lamp illuminating my room with the sounds of the city in the distance and i am living for it

>would trust with my drink at a bar

> Personal Song Reccs based off this playlist💛:

• My Own - H.E.R.

• Everbody Business - Kehlani

• Irresponsible - Kiana Ledé

[sensationalstardust]

"Well you didn't say it was animated!"

"What difference does that make?"

"What diifference- It's for kids!"

".......I like the show"

[trans-mordekaiser]

one (1) mordekaiser lore breadcrumb per year quota filled

[thethirdbill]

I listened to the music of Arcane for the first time with no context! I hope you enjoy my thoughts and reactions if you check it out!

[twinktosterone]

got clocked as a league player i am going to murder caitlyn from league of legends

[justaghostingon]

Room if Swords Reactions:

Gyrus is Mr. Steal Ur Kill

[drumkenz]

(via GIPHY)

[givemegifs]

[adascore]

Have I Not Given Enough

pairings: arsenal wfc x young!reader

warnings: crying. self-blaming. teen!reader reacting to losing against wolfsburg.

author's note: oh to be comforted by the arsenal girlies...

masterlist

•••••••

''We'll come back stronger, kid. Only the start for you.'' Caitlin patted her back before making her way to congratulate the Wolfsburg players.

The Arsenal striker stood on her own now, bathing in the misery of defeat. The worn pitch beneath Y/N's boots felt colder, a stark contrast to the warmth of anticipation that had filled the air just hours ago.

This wasn't how it was supposed to end. The set-up was perfect; Arsenal making it into the Champions League finals for the first time in over 15 years at a sold-out Emirates Stadium.

Bremer's extra time goal had ruined it all. The cheers had been replaced by a haunting silence, broken only by distant celebrations from the victorious Wolfsburg team.

The teenager was a sad sight as she tried not to burst out in tears, standing all on her own by the opposition's goalposts. The gravity of the loss weighed on her shoulders

Somehow she managed to move her feet towards the other players, going through the post-match routine: congratulating the Wolfsburg players, who in return offered their solace.

It was nice to have players like Popp express their admiration for the youngster, but in the moment she couldn't bring herself to care one bit.

''Nice goal, kid.'' Ewa Pajor patted her head, praising her opening goal of the match, the one that had kickstarted the long, grueling fight between the German and English team.

Y/N managed a weak smile, grateful for the acknowledgment.

''Hey, hey, Boneca!'' Rafaelle approached her. ''You should be proud of yourself, okay? Remember the noise in the stadium when you made that goal? Savor that feeling.'' Her Brazilian teammate told her, holding her close.

Katie noticed the interaction and decided to join them, leaving Teyah and Lia behind. ''Hey, girlie. Why the sad face? You've just made yourself a legend.'' The Irishwoman managed to genuinely laugh.

''We lost, Macca.'' A few tears escaped, but they were immediately wiped away by Katie and Rafa.

''Yeah, and it hurts. But you, baby goat, just scored in a Champions League semifinal against a club that has won this thing 2 times.'' She grinned, the pride she felt beaming off of her face as she used the playful nickname.

Y/N was pulled into a supportive hug by Katie, providing much comfort. Rafa affectionately pinched her cheek before making her way towards their other teammates.

As the huddle expanded, more teammates joined them, forming a circle of support around the young player who felt this loss harder than anyone else.

Jen held her close to her body, as if shielding her from the harsh reality of the defeat. The Scott wasn't telling her anything, just holding her as their teammates tried getting a smile out of her.

''I was like ''Yeah! Woo!'' The atmosphere was insane!'' Manu did an impression of her reaction to Y/N's opening goal.

''It's like the stadium came alive, it was so fucking crazy!'' Kaylan exclaimed, with animated hand gestures.

Y/N appreciated her teammates and their consolations. However, she couldn't escape the weight of disappointment that she felt within her. Despite their genuine efforts to coax a smile, the young player found herself unable to entertain them.

''Oh my god, you did so well, Y/N. You were amazing.'' Victoria hugged her as Jen let her go.

''Thanks, Vic.'' She mumbled on the Dutchwoman's shoulder.

The midfielder swung her from side to side. ''Don't cry, it's okay.'' She tried to comfort her younger friend.

Y/N felt another pair of hands on her back, hands that belonged to another Dutchwoman, although, this time it was not a teammate.

''Hey, meid.'' Jill greeted her, and Y/N pulled away from Vic, who said something in Dutch to her patriot.

''There's gonna come a day where you're gonna lift that trophy, okay? You've grown so much.'' Her former teammate praised her.

The teenager nodded. ''Thanks, Jilly.''

Jill planted a kiss on her head, bidding goodbye as she joined her teammates again in their celebrations.

As Victoria pulled Y/N back into her embrace, the teenager's gaze caught sight of the approaching figures of Kim, Leah, Beth, and Vivianne.

The teenager skillfully transitioned from hugging Victoria, gently slipping away as the crowd dispersed. She made her way to the bench, where the atmosphere was more peaceful as most people were scattered around the pitch.

As she settled on the bench, Y/N took a deep breath, her emotions threatening to surface. Before she could fully let herself go, a familiar voice interrupted her thoughts.

''Hey, what's going on?'' Steph, observant as ever, approached with concern etched on her face.

The striker tried to mask her emotions with a forced smile. ''Just disappointed.''

Steph nodded understandingly. ''I get it. But you got us through this match, and I'm very proud of you.''

''Thanks, Stephy- you were amazing too.'' Y/N quickly reciprocated the compliment, her eyes darting around.

The Australian noticed a frown on her face. ''Hey… you okay? You look like you're having panic attack.''

At her words, Y/N looked her straight in the eyes. ''No, no! I just wanna go home, to be honest.'' It wasn't a lie. All she wanted to do was to get in the car, and lie in her bed until it was time for the next match.

Steph nodded. ''Take your time, sweetie.'' The defender joined the squad on the pitch again, leaving the young one alone.

In the distance, Beth approached Jen, her expression reflecting concern. ''Hey, Jen, have you seen Y/N?''

Jen furrowed her brow, scanning the surroundings. ''Uh, she was with Vic like a minute ago.''

''Oh, alright. How was she doing?''

The Scott pouted. ''Looked pretty torn up, as you'd expect. Some of us were trying to cheer her up, but you know the kid…'' She made some sort of gesture that indicated she was not taking it well.

''Poor thing.'' The Brit sighed.

Back on the bench, Y/N remained in solitude, staring mindlessly at nothing.

''Hiding?'' The sudden voice of Rose, their physiotherapist, made the youngster flinch.

''Jesus, Rose!'' Y/N exclaimed, her hand on her heart.

Rose chuckled, unfazed by the reaction. ''Sorry, didn't mean to startle you. You looked like you needed a moment.''

''Yeah…''

The older woman nodded at her lack of words. ''It's okay. Take all the time you need. We're doing the huddle in a minute, though, so you might want to join that.''

''Yeah, I will.'' Y/N replied.

Contemplating the upcoming huddle, Y/N's unease heightened when her eyes locked with Kim's on the pitch. The captain started walking over to her with an unreadable expression.

Unable to face the captain she respected so much, she rose from the bench, pretending she hadn't noticed Kim's approach.

Rose watched as Y/N escaped from the interaction with Kim, giving the captain a sad smile.

The teenager's eyes scanned the pitch, Gio's friendly wave caught Y/N's attention, and she decided to make her way towards her friend.

''Tough match, huh?'' She said, trying to offer some solace.

''To say the least.'' The Brit sighed, glancing down at the ground.

''You okay?'' The Brazilian asked, Y/N's darting eyes were anything but subtle.

''Yeah, I just… yeah, I'm fine.'' She stuttered, not having the heart to actually say what she was doing.

Gio could sense Y/N's unease. ''Should I get Beth or Viv?''

''No, no! Just… I don't wanna face them right now.'' She admitted.

''Why?'' The forward didn't understand, knowing how close she was with the couple.

''I just… I- I can't do it.''

Gio nodded anyway. ''Okay, stay with me then. We'll hang back a bit.''

Kathrine joined them as well, the three youngsters keeping each other company while waiting for the entire squad.

In the huddle, Y/N strategically averted her gaze, fixating on the ground beneath her feet.

As Jonas addressed the team, the weight of disappointment pressed heavily on her shoulders, and she struggled to engage fully in the moment.

''I'm proud of this team. We're standing here in a sold-out stadium, and we gave them a fight. We didn't give up and we gave our everything until the end.''

The Swede's words were a mere distant hum. Her mind replayed all the crucial moments of the match, each missed opportunity being screened in her mind.

While the team absorbed Jonas's encouragement, Y/N continued to bear the weight of her perceived failure, the applause and cheers around her a muffled backdrop to the cacophony of self-critical thoughts.

Afterwards, Lotte pulled her in an embrace. Her England teammate's presence being a source of comfort.

The Arsenal homegrowns' moment was interjected by someone grabbing Y/N's arm.

''A goal against Wolfsburg or what?'' The England captain said.

The attempt at light banter didn't quite reach her heavy heart, the teenager simply shrugging her shoulders.

Leah, perceptive as ever, sensed her teammate's unease and tried to give a sense of perspective. ''Hey, you have so much to be proud of. Look at this stadium! This is only the beginning.''

Despite the skipper's encouraging words, tears welled up in Y/N's eyes once again. The disappointment was cemented in her mind.

In the midst of her emotional turmoil, Vivianne and Beth approached, their expressions reflecting heavy concern.

Beth's eyes softened as she pulled Y/N into a gentle hug, aware of the unspoken pain lingering in the air. Vivianne placed a reassuring hand on her back, silently offering support.

''Hey, kiddo, you were absolutely brilliant.'' The elder of the two said, caressing the back of her head.

At the lack of response, she continued. ''It's okay to be upset, sweetheart. You're feeling a lot, aren't you?''

Y/N nodded, her voice catching as she struggled to articulate her feelings. The couple exchanged worried glances, realizing the impact the loss had on their young teammate.

''I'm so proud of you, you gave it your all.'' As Vivianne expressed her pride, Y/N's emotions reached a breaking point.

Sobs escaped her, and she clung tightly to her mentor, seeking refuge in the strength she had always admired.

The Dutchwoman took over from Beth, pulling the youngster even closer to her.

''I'm so sorry, Viv.'' Y/N apologized, full of guilt for not bringing the team to the Champions League final.

As she continued to apologize, Vivianne gently cupped her face and whispered reassuring words. ''Don't apologize. It's not about the result on the scoreboard. You played with your heart, and that's the most important thing.''

Y/N, overwhelmed by emotions, couldn't shake the feeling of letting down those she admired the most. ''I wanted us to win, especially for all of you who couldn't play.'' She mumbled.

''You've made all of us super proud, lieverd. It's a journey, remember? You still have a long way.'' She whispered, her own tears betraying the depth of her emotions.

Leah reached out to rest a hand on the teenager's shoulder. ''Darling, you were without a doubt one of the best players on the pitch.''

''I missed so many shots.'' Y/N stated through a sob.

''And so did the others. Don't carry this on your own, my girl.'' Leah retorted.

Beth and Lotte, recognizing the rawness of Y/N's emotions, instinctively moved to shield her from the intrusive gaze of the cameraman. ''Can you not?'' The defender furrowed her eyebrows.

The players didn't want their teammate's vulnerable moment to be exploited. Fortunately, the crew listened and moved further onto the pitch.

''I made so many mistakes.'' She continued crying. The floodgates had opened and closing them would be a difficult task.

''You didn't, darling. Like Beth said, you were brilliant.'' Leah's own eyes were now being filled with tears, Y/N's self-blame making her emotional.

Y/N shook her head at the skipper's words, hiding her face in Vivianne's neck. ''You were, listen to Leah.'' The Dutchwoman muttered, caressing her back.

''Hey, Y/N. Hey.'' Kim's voice sounded out of, seemingly, nowhere. Leah moved out of the way so the captain could get closer to the teenager. ''You've got nothing to be sad about. You played a fantastic match. Yeah, we didn't get the win, but you've made the club so proud.''

Her voice was stern, but it was a loving sternness. ''Let's go and thank the fans now. They deserve a proper thanks.'' She urged the entire group to do a lap of the pitch.

As the squad gathered together and walked around, the players waved and applauded the fans. The defeat stung, but the bond, not just between the players, but also between the players and the supporters is something special and unbreakable.

Regardless of the result, they're celebrating the players as if they did win and Y/N felt herself smile as she looked into the crowd, and seeing the Gooners experience this with them, with her.

In a quiet moment, Kim approached her again. ''You're creating something special here, Y/N. The way you've got the fans behind you… you're like their own personal star girl. Please, enjoy it,'' the midfielder patted her back, ''because this is what I want you to remember from this match.''

A teary-eyed Y/N, managed to nod her head in appreciation. ''Thanks, Kimmy.''

The pair found themselves holding hands as they continued thanking the fans. It was a beautiful image as it represented the older and new generation of Arsenal; Kim, a captain with years of experience, comforting Y/N, someone who undoubtedly was the future of the Gunners, and could potentially become a skipper in the distant future.

[miastideclock]

name playlist, "grace."

staytinymoagene asked:

Hi! Idk if you still do these but if you do could you make me a name playlist? My name is Grace

-

i was like closing my laptop to go to sleep when i got this notification, but i love making name playlists so much!! so here we are!!

G - GIANTS by True Damage, Becky G, Keke Palmer, Jeon Soyeon, Duckwrth, Thutmose

R - Rock With You by SEVENTEEN

A - All In by Stray Kids

C - Cassette by ayokay

E - EVERYDAY by WINNER

hope you liked it! feel free to request again! -bennie ♡

[jayflrt]

𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝟕𝟖𝟔 19. attention seeker

welcome to the second act. warnings for this chapter include depictions of alcoholism and family issues

'BEING AN INFLUENCER WAS A REAL JOB THAT REQUIRED A TREMENDOUS AMOUNT OF WORK.'

Yeah, right.

Shin Yuna heard phrases along those lines all the time. Whenever she watched other people's content, a good majority of the influencers would rant about how difficult their life was, or how stressful their workload was when it came to recording and editing.

Sure, it took some effort to edit and upload new content. Yuna allocated several hours a week to do so, but all she had to do was set up a livestream for the cash to start rolling in. Wear something skimpy. Bat her lashes at the camera. Pout a little. Play up the damsel in distress act. It was simply too easy.

princessval***: omg girl pls stop drinking 😭 onlyyuna03: she's so messy i love her luvyuna***: you're back already? i thought you were taking a break onlyyuna03: @luvyuna*** you must be new LOL she always does this

But this—the flood of comments that poisoned her screen—was the curse of putting herself on the internet.

It wasn't like this during her first year of streaming. Back in high school, Yuna's parents were fighting every day, and since she didn't have any friends to talk to, she turned to the internet. She would stay up all night in random Discord servers, chatting with strangers and confiding in them about her family issues.

Naturally, these chats turned into voice calls, which later turned into video calls. Initiated by her, of course. No one else had their cameras on, though; Yuna quickly grew comfortable being in the spotlight, basking in the glow of praise from strangers. Comments like 'you're so gorgeous' and 'you should be a model' made her forget all about her family issues for a split second. Like that, it became like a drug for her.

Yuna, who was starved of attention, relished in the validation she got from online strangers. Strangers who wouldn't even share any personal information about themselves, going by fake names and hiding how old they were.

Soon after, she made her own Discord server, inviting everyone who wanted to see her get in front of her camera and talk about her day. She knew how to play her angles well, acting as if she was everyone's girlfriend while using them to satisfy her need for attention. It was a classic marketing strategy: Yuna knew her asset was her beauty, so she used it to her advantage.

All she had to do was send a picture of herself or talk in a cute voice, and everyone would fawn over her in seconds. In a life where Yuna's own parents neglected her, she found people who cared. Maybe their intentions weren't in the right place, but they were present and ready to listen to whatever she had to say.

She got ambitious, deciding to start live-streaming to a wider audience. Yuna started on Twitch, playing various games like Overwatch and League of Legends. She didn't have to be very good as long as people liked her face and stayed for her reactions.

As she grew a following, she moved to YouTube and TikTok, doubling her follower count in only months. Before, she would be talking to an audience of around 20 people, but now she was racking in thousands as soon as she went live.

Of course, there came drama, too. And Yuna found it exhilarating.

If someone called her out on something, all she had to do was come up with some sob story about how she didn't deserve to hear that, and everyone would come with pitchforks to defend her. She was very calculative in that way, knowing exactly when and how to turn the tide if it wasn't in her favor.

For some reason, that never seemed to work with her parents.

"You're a disappointment," her father spat at her the day she showed him her Yale acceptance letter. She had sparkles in her eyes and a bright smile all day, only for her to feel completely crushed. She couldn't understand why; it was her father's dream for her to get into Yale, after all. "This is the only acceptance letter you've got, huh?"

Yuna hesitated. The competition for all of the Ivy League schools was rough this year; she had been getting rejections left and right, but she thought her family would be satisfied with Yale. After all, it was her father's alma mater.

"Yeah," she answered in a small voice. She looked down at her acrylic-damaged nails, neglected from years of biting the skin until they bled. "I thought you'd be happy with Yale."

"Happy?" Mr. Shin barked out a laugh. "You didn't actually get into Yale on your own, you know that, right?" He scoffed when Yuna gave him a confused look. Then, Mr. Shin slammed his phone against the dinner table, causing his wife and daughter to flinch. "Five hundred thousand. I paid five hundred thousand to get you in. Mr. Nakamura only paid two to get Kazuha in, but I had to pay five. That's how useless you are."

"Sunoo? You know my old boss's son?" he would provoke her for the rest of dinner. "He got in all by himself. You know Hyejin's son—Anton—he got into Yale and Brown on his own, too."

"You need to work hard, Yuna," Mrs. Shin said before stabbing at her salad. "Your dad could only get you in as an undeclared major. You need to get into pre-med on your own."

Tears prickled her eyes, but she stayed silent. Even her college acceptance was a fraud; she had done nothing out of her own hard work.

Except her skyrocketing career as an influencer.

The high of her fame only lasted a short while, though. During the summer before her freshman year of college, Yuna's parents discovered what she had been getting up to on the internet.

Shameful, they called it, as if Yuna was committing a crime.

Yuna's parents were surgeons, and rather good ones at that. They both got their undergraduate degrees at Stanford, and then their doctorates at Harvard. The two of them became neurosurgeons after their residency and board exams, and then transferred to Mercy Health where Mr. Shin became the Chair of Neurological Surgery, which set the bar a little high for Yuna.

She was never spectacular. She was always more interested in makeup and clothes instead of science and medicine. Yuna would've rather worked toward a career as a fashion designer, often dreaming about fashion shows she could design for. She knew she would make it far, too—even Donatella Versace told her backstage during Paris Fashion Week that she had an eye for fashion, and that she could go far.

The few times she visited your house, she remembered meeting your mom, a well-known fashion designer herself, and showing off her sketches. Yuna distinctly recalled her words of approval, and she had to bite her tongue whenever your mom would offer to take Yuna on a tour of her studio, only for her parents to turn down the offer.

Her parents were so adamant about Yuna following their path to becoming a surgeon that they threw away all of her sketchbooks and colored pencils when she showed them her work. Even when she got the opportunity of a lifetime to be taken under Vivienne Westwood's wing, her parents crushed her dreams under their heels.

From a young age, she knew that hard work was only determined by her parents. Her true efforts were simply considered a waste of time.

Naturally, Yuna let out all her emotions when she live-streamed. It just so happened that her parents found out through the families of people who knew her. First, she would be grounded. When that wouldn't work, she would get all of her devices taken away. When she found a loophole around that, she would have to endure her father's rage.

Halfway through her first year at Yale, her parents disowned her.

She was on academic probation after her first semester. While she was trying to file a restraining order against someone who was stalking her (who claimed to be a fan), her grades managed to slip until she failed most of her classes. The worst part was, she had been expecting her parents to worry about the stalking incident, but they only cared about her GPA. Casting Yuna away was just protecting the Shin family's shiny status.

Everything was gone. Yuna was no longer part of the world you and Sunoo lived in. All her connections to the medical field, all her connections to the fashion industry—all out of her grasp. Still, maybe it was her flickering hope to somehow please her parents that kept her on the path to become a doctor. Not that it something she was genuinely interested in, but she knew it was the only way her parents would take her back.

Now she had to keep up her influencer career to support herself financially. There was no way she would be able to pay off tuition, even if Sunoo had generously paid the deposit for her small apartment. She had to keep up with bills, rent, and utilities all at once, and it was all too much for an eighteen-year-old to handle.

She got used to accepting help because of that. You helped foot some of her bills, Sunoo helped with tuition, Anton helped make sure she was eating, and the money she got from streaming and posting videos was enough to cover the rest of her expenses.

Even with an outlet to express her concerns to her fans, though, Yuna was struggling with barely making friends. You, Sunoo, and Anton were the only ones who lent a shoulder and an ear for her to dump all her pain and worries to. But she still had to hold them at arm's length. After all, all of their upper-crust families were in close contact with each other.

And then there was Lee Heeseung.

He was a new face in the socialite scene. No one had heard of him or his family before. Heeseung was probably Yuna's ideal type—handsome, intelligent, popular, and someone who hadn't been sucked into her world yet. Although he was alledgedly close to you and Park Sunghoon, no one else had any idea of what his family did.

Over the years, Yuna was terrified that she had built a reputation among the rich families that were in her circle. She could feel the disdain in their eyes when she was at social events, steering clear of every adult that looked as though they wanted to probe her for information about her college admissions.

Heeseung, however, was like a breath of fresh air. There was no judgment in his eyes when Yuna spoke to him, and that might have been the very moment she fell for him.

He was different. He didn't have any expectations of her nor did he feel uncomfortable when he found out she was a streamer. She liked that he came from a humble background, and he never judged her from where she came from. Even when Yuna confessed that she had been disowned, Heeseung never looked at her with pity in his eyes. He simply told her that he would be there if she ever needed him, and he left it at that.

She tried her best to get close to him, but the closer Yuna got, the more she saw under the surface—the more she realized she was heading toward heartbreak. It was clear as day that Heeseung was deeply in love with you, and it seemed as though he had no intention of considering any other woman. Even Yuna could tell he would give up everything in a heartbeat for your sake.

Yuna did her best to avoid conversations about Heeseung with you. She figured that if they never brought him up, then you wouldn't start to feel differently about him.

To her relief, you started dating Park Sunghoon.

Yuna used Heeseung's vulnerability to her advantage. As much as she liked him, he was a coward when it came to his own feelings; Heeseung could only bring himself to come clean about how he felt for you after you started dating another man. Of course, he was turned down—ignored, even. In your mind, you just wanted to keep up the fantasy of having a close childhood friend to the point where you had Heeseung bottle up everything he felt.

Yuna thought you were cruel back then, but she was even more so.

She knew that Heeseung couldn't do anything about his feelings no matter how much it ate at him, so Yuna pretended she wanted to listen to him go on and on about how miserable he was. It was all because of you, and, for a period of time, Yuna despised you for it.

Months rolled by, and Yuna found herself going over to Heeseung's dorm room nearly every day. They talked about anything and everything, and then the conversation would eventually shift to you. Yuna felt something chip at her heart every time he mentioned your name, but she braved through it all.

"Thanks for coming over," Heeseung murmured, running a hand through his already-messy hair. Yuna could smell the alcohol on his breath when she sat down next to him on the floor. Heeseung laughed. "One-month anniversary. Y/N always told me she found those stupid."

Yuna pressed her lips into a thin line. She remembered walking to class with you last week and hearing you gush about everything you bought Sunghoon for your one-month anniversary as a couple. She thought it was sweet back then, but hearing it come from Heeseung made Yuna feel sick.

"You don't have to thank me," she said, hugging her knees to her chest. "I just wanted to be here for you."

The first time she tried to kiss Heeseung was that night.

The first time Heeseung rejected her was right after he stopped her.

"I can't," he said at the time, drawing away from her. "I'm sorry, it's just—"

"You're not over Y/N," she finished for him with a twinge of bitterness.

He shook his head, saying nothing. Yuna felt a surge of misdirected anger.

Yuna knew from the moment she met you that people like you were the shiny gold coins that everyone wanted to have, and people like her were rusted-over pennies on the sidewalk to be stepped on and forgotten. She was a fool to think that Heeseung would see past that.

"I know that." Her tone was sharp as she got to her feet, and Heeseung followed suit right after. "But I suggest you get over her soon because it's not gonna happen."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Exactly what I said. Y/N would never go out with you. She already turned you down, anyway."

"Is that so?"

When Yuna turned around to look at Heeseung, his expression was like stone. Something ugly was twisting its way around her heart, squeezing out every semblance of affection she ever had for you.

"Yeah," she replied with a simpering smile, "because she's just too nice to choose the guy who broke her friend's heart."

"Broke—?"

"And," she said louder, cutting him off, "Sunghoon doesn't know, does he? Wouldn't he feel really betrayed if he found out?"

Heeseung kept his face impassive, but Yuna could tell he was seething. She cornered him quite well.

She kept that farce up for years. It was easy keeping Heeseung in line when you only had eyes for Sunghoon, and Heeseung was just so easily discouraged by Yuna's words. It was almost like he had no hope that you would take his word over hers, and that sent Yuna on some sort of power trip.

Her relationship with you was strange. Maybe it was at that moment when she realized that she was someone important to you, and that made her feel invincible somehow. She could do anything as long as you were on her side.

She liked drinking. Not because she particularly liked the taste of alcohol, but she loved the feeling of forgetting all her responsibilities. Every rotten memory of her parents would bury itself under the sand for the time being, and all she could feel was adrenaline pumping through her blood.

But she was never exactly in control. It only took a year to slip up in front of her friend group (thankfully when you weren't around), so she begged Karina, Yeonjun, and Giselle to keep quiet about her crush on Heeseung. They weren't even extremely close at the time, but they knew better than to tread on a situation between you and Sunghoon, whose parents were far more influential than theirs.

"It's only gonna cause more problems if she finds out," Yuna told them through choked sobs. "If Y/N finds out, things will never be the same between us, and Sunghoon doesn't even know that Heeseung has feelings for Y/N." As Giselle stroked her hair gently, Yuna said, "I can get over him on my own. Just please keep this from Y/N."

Karina and Yeonjun exchanged nervous looks before they reluctantly agreed. She had always been wary about Karina. Giselle was overly-empathetic to her situation, Yeonjun was a good listener because he thrived off of drama, but Karina had always seemed more skeptical.

And, as Heeseung knew, Yuna always found a way to silence people who she felt she couldn't trust, so she played dumb when she outed Karina on live.

It was a stupid move on her part, to be fair. Yuna deeply regretted it as soon as she realized what she said. Karina iced her out for months, and everyone else was on the colder side—even Sunoo, who had been her close friend for so long. She always felt strangely jealous of Sunoo, who got the approval of her father when she couldn't, but seeing him give her the cold shoulder nearly sent her over the edge.

"I apologized so many times!" she cried to him. Sunoo kept his guard up, but he always heard her out when she needed him. "I just don't know what else to do. I keep fucking up."

Sunoo frowned. "Do you even feel bad about what you did, or do you feel bad because you were caught?"

Yuna didn't respond to his question, but she knew exactly what the answer was. Was she pathetic? Probably.

She ruined everything. She always ruined everything.

Maybe it was just easier that way. Yuna knew that if she tried her best to please everyone, it would still never be enough. Hurting them before she cared too much was just a defense mechanism, as selfish as it sounded. If you chopped down the tree before it grew too tall, it wouldn't hinder the plants under its shade from growing.

The thing was, Yuna received blow after blow all her life without any acts of mercy. She was struck over and over again, and no one delivered the final coup de grâce.

Naturally, Karina came around and forgave her. Another missed blow. It was like Yuna was drunk off the drama itself because if she kept acting out and causing all these problems, then she could keep everyone's attention on her.

And then she wouldn't have to be so alone.

But the cycle went on and on, so when Yuna found herself texting Jay and Sunghoon in her drunken stupor, she hardly considered the consequences when she mentioned the long-kept secret of Heeseung's first love. You trusted her to keep your conversation with Jay about breaking up with Sunghoon to herself, but she violated that as soon as she could, too. She wasn't sure what it was, but whenever she looked in the mirror, all she saw was that she was as bad as her parents.

Yuna was fated to fall into the same destructive cycle over and over again until it stabbed her in the back for good. Until she bled out, though, everything was fair game.

prev | masterlist | next

SUMMARY ▸ private investigator jay park just wants to complete his mission quietly and move on with his life. you, his new assignment who keeps consuming his thoughts, don't make that very easy for him.

TAG LIST ▸ @zdgx1 @smouches @heesdazed @teawithbucky @leep0ems @peachpie4you @niniissus @kgneptun @jaeyunluvr @hooniesuniverse @zerasari @enhalov @sophiko22 @iselltulips @hoondiors @baekhyunstruly @jays-property @woninluv @heerinnie @fakeuwus @yizhoutv @en-happiness @theothernads @y4wnjunz @dammit-jjk @en-happiness @mari-oclock @enhypens-baby @soonyoungblr @jakeslvt @taetaenic @jebetwo @fairysungx @hsgwrld @shmooooo @ineedsomezzz @mrowwww @enha-stars @isawritesss @seongclb @lockburn-castle @alyssajavenss @enczen @calumsfringe @w3bqrl @luvyev @uhsakusa @luvnicho @wildflowermooon @navsnct