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lookismaddict · 2 years

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Lookism: Rendezvous 🔞 (Ch. I) || Gun Park x Fem! Reader ♡

Author’s Note: Hi, I hope everyone is doing ok! If you’re reading this right after the Intro, I’m so sorry that I wrote such a long part for just an introduction to the story. I just wanted to provide the MC’s backstory so that it’ll help you guys understand where the story is going. But I do hope that you guys enjoyed the Introduction, and I hope you’ll like Ch. I as well!

NSFW Warning: Violence, strong language/cursing, and light sexual content (?).

Story Summary: You traveled abroad to help support your mother who is sick, back home in Japan. However, once you reached Korea, everything went downhill until you met a stranger who offered you a deal that could benefit you. But who knew that this special encounter would turn your whole life around…

“I’m sorry… what was that? You want me to be your what?”

Gun leaned against the wall that was next to him then lit his cigarette once more. “I said that I’ll turn you into one of my greatest masterpieces. You got potential to be a great fighter. If you get proper training from me, then I’ll make sure that you’ll develop into a pure unstoppable force.”

You crossed your arms while you scoffed to the side. “What? So… what are you implying? That I LIKED fighting? Haha sorry to burst your bubble, but I only did that by chance just to survive. Hell, that was actually the first fight I had. I’ve never fought in my life. I’m not a thug.”

Goo crossed his arms sternly. “Sooo… you mean to say that you’ve been a pacifist until now? I don’t believe that one bit sweetheart. You better be honest with us now or else I’ll have to find out through my OWN way.”

You took a step back wearily while holding both of your hands out in front of you towards Goo, trying to stop him from coming any closer to you. “I swear! Why would I even lie about that? Besides now I have another problem. I don’t know where the hell I’m at right now. I just lost everything that I had. And plus, I have nowhere to go, and now I’m stuck with you two lunatics!”

Goo was just nodding while listening to you rant away. On the other hand, Gun’s face remained expressionless. His mind was wandering somewhere else, trying to put the pieces together in his head. Like he was trying to calculate some sort of big equation. “Hey.”

You stopped blabbering your issues to Goo as the both of you turned to Gun who seemed to finally get what’s going on. “You weren’t a fighter from the beginning. Yet, you somehow knew how to fight. So, if you didn’t have prior knowledge about fighting, then you must’ve gotten them from somewhere. Have you been exposed to someone doing some type of martial arts training recently, or have you watched some type of show or documentary on it?”

You thought about it for a minute until you realized…

Yes, I have.

“Ah, well… Back in my hometown, I used to work part-time at a small karate school. My job there was to just bring materials during class. Like wooden boards, and planks, and all that. I didn’t really get to participate physically, but I always watched the students being taught by the head master. I’ve always found it really fun just to be there, and watch how karate was taught by professionals.”

“Then that’s all I needed to know.” Gun smirked, making his way back towards the exit of the alleyway until he paused at his tracks. “Oh I almost forgot to ask.” Suddenly, he turned his head back towards you. His gaze was so sharp that it pierced right through your whole body, which sent shivers down your spine.

“What’s your name?”

Your eyes, barely hanging onto his gaze, didn’t blink once. “It’s (F/N) Sasaki.”

“I see.” He turned his back towards you once more before continuing to exit out of the alley. “Come on, I’ll drop off Goo first before I figure out what to do with you.”

Goo raised an eyebrow. His eyes switched from Gun, to you, then back to Gun again before chasing after him. “Hey, wait up! What was that just now, you checking her out or what?” You heard his laughs bounce off the walls around you, as you stood there still trying to process what just happened.

What’s going to happen to me now?

You sighed as you willingly followed both of them out of the alley. It’s not like you had a choice to go with them anyways. When the streets were finally in view, you saw Gun and Goo both hop into the front seats of a black expensive Rolls Royce car parked on the other side of the street. You looked both ways before crossing the street, heading over to where they were at.

You got in the backseat of the car, shutting the door behind you. You buckled up and let Gun take the wheel to drive to Goo’s supposed destination. You leaned against the side of the car door next to you, staring at the street lights passing by. At the same time, you listened in on Gun and Goo’s conversation as they exchanged words in hushed voices.

“Gun, what made you decide on taking her under your care? I’m guessing it wasn’t just because you think that she’s a good fighter. Right?”

“Well, think about it. She said that she’s been watching people do karate for a while. We don’t know how long she’s been doing it for, but we now know where she got her new skills from.”

“And? What does that have to do with your verdict?”

“You’re not thinking any harder dumbass.”

“Hm…” From the right side-view mirror, you watched Goo close his eyes. He was pinching his own chin in between his two fingers, trying to concentrate.

The car filled with a long minute of silence until his eyes shot open like a light bulb just lit up above his head. He then turned to Gun with a mischievous smirk saying, “Ohhh, I get it now. She reminds you of Daniel Park, huh?”

Gun’s mouth curved devilishly, returning a smirk back to Goo’s realization. “That’s right.” His eyes seemed focused on the road in front of him, but his mind was somewhere else. Both of his hands were steady and firm on the wheel, like he just had a clear goal in mind and now he is willing to fulfill it no matter what.

Daniel Park? Who’s that?

“I did confirm that Daniel had the Copy Ability, like Johan Seong, the Copy Genius. Both of them would have turned into monsters if they were to have accepted my offer, but no matter. At least now, I have a secret weapon in my grasp. I got lucky this time.”

“Tsk, tsk, tsk. What are you saying? I was the one who found her first. She’ll be besties with me in no time. Right, (Y/N)?”

You jumped in your seat and quickly pulled your eyes away from the two of them, pretending that you just didn’t get caught listening in on them. Your eyes became so focused on the window, staring intently at the plain street lamps above you while the car drove by.

Crap. I wished I accidentally fell asleep in the car instead of eavesdropping on them like this.

Goo chuckled to himself knowing that he had been watching your movements ever since you got in the car, from the side-view mirror on his side.

As the expensive luxury car sped through the night, your eyes started to close little by little, drifting off to a long and lulled slu-

“We’re here.”

Not this time Satan.

Thank god, you were alarmed by Gun’s call. While you were rubbing your eyes to cease the sleepiness, you looked out the window until your jaw dropped. You couldn’t believe your eyes as they trailed up towards the top of a very large building. Large letters that said, “One MCN,” stood at the front of the building’s entrance. You wondered what type of company owns the building in front of you and what business does Goo have to be going to such a place.

Goo stretched in his seat then whipped around to turn to you. “(Y/N), have you thought about what we talked about?”

Is he talking about the “secret friend” thing?

You slowly nodded. Goo smirked and leaned in closer to you while clinging onto his seat. “So what will your answer be? Will you accept?”

You thought about it for a second, but you already know what the right answer would be.

You leaned in closer to him then whispered into his ear…

“No.”

Goo clicked his tongue with slight annoyance. “Ah, so that’s your response huh? What a shame. I hope you won’t regret it later on in the future.” He gave an ominous smile to you before turning back to Gun. “Well I’ll see you whenever, regardless of what comes up in my schedule. I’ll be looking forward to what you have in store for (Y/N).”

Gun clenched the steering wheel in annoyance that you could’ve sworn that you saw the veins from his hands popping from high blood pressure. “Yeah, yeah, just get out of my car already. And remember, you owe me next time. I already repaid you just by being your driver for today. You know how much I hate being in Gangnam.”

Goo grinned at Gun while slamming the door right in front of him, silencing Gun’s nagging. “That bastard.” Gun muttered under his breath. As he switched the car’s gear stick to drive, he hit the gas and sped away. Startled, you turned your head around and watched Goo’s figure getting smaller and smaller as he stood in front of the building’s entrance waving goodbye at you. Your heart was still palpitating quickly from Gun’s acceleration, but you swore that you caught a glimpse of Goo’s eyes for a split second. His eyes gave off such an uneasy vibe that you didn’t stare at him for too long, so you turned back towards the front of the car.

What did he mean when he said that I might regret my decision in the future? Was that an actual threat from him?

The thought of crossing him again made your palms sweat nervously. Well now, at least you don’t have to deal with two intimidating men. Now it’s just down to one. Although you were relieved to see Goo go, Gun’s presence still made you a bit uneasy.

However, just watching him drive seemed to have calmed you since your eyes have been scanning him for a while. You checked out his face from the backseat through the rear view mirror, looking as sharp as ever. Since you were closer to him now than when you guys were outside, you can smell a whiff of his musky cologne that must’ve been expensive. Your eyes moved to his broad shoulders and his muscular build underneath the multiple layers of clothing he had on was visible, which surprised you. This made you wonder how strong could this man be if he were to remove each layer, piece by piece…

“Have you eaten yet?”

“No, I hav- . . . Eh?”

Your words seemed to have gotten stuck in your throat until you realized that those words that he just spoke weren’t in Korean. They were in Japanese.

(Now speaking in Japanese)

“EHHH?! Did you just speak to me in Japanese???”

“Yeah, why are you so surprised?”

“Well, I didn’t know that you’d actually speak in Japanese. You caught me off guard! But wait a minute. How did you know I was Japanese?”

“You told me your name, remember? Your family name is obviously Japanese. Plus, no Korean woman who’s a local around here would be at that place where we found you, at this time of night. Unless, you’re a prostitute…”

Your cheeks flushed in deep scarlet, making you cross your arms and looked away in embarrassment. “A PROSTITUTE?! ARE YOU SERIOUS?! No way! And even if I was a prostitute, what kind of prostitute would beat up her own customers?”

Gun flinched from the loud tone of your voice just now. Afterwards, he shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly while his hands were still on the steering wheel. “Alright woman, I get it! You didn’t have to be so loud. But I don’t know, you tell me.”

You were so furious that you were about to retort back at him, until you were reminded of your belongings still back at that shady bar. “We need to go back...”

“What?”

“I said, we need to go BACK! That asshole still has my luggage bag!”

“What asshole? The hell are you on about?”

At this point, you gave a brief summary of what happened, to Gun. You explained what started the fight you had with one of the two maniacs in the first place and what your first experience was like when you first arrived in Seoul.

Gun suddenly hit the brakes in the middle of an empty street. Good thing there weren’t any cars around during this time. His head turned around to look at you, with such intensity. You weren’t sure if it was due to irritability from having to go back and get your stuff, or anger from the assholes who happened to manage to pull something off like that. At that moment, you didn’t want to question him any further.

“Where’s the place at?”

You tried recalling what the bar was called from your memories until you remembered, “Venus’s Paradise.”

Gun stepped on the gas, as he made a sharp U-turn back towards the place where you first arrived in Gangnam. The U-turn was so sharp, that you could feel the force from the acceleration weigh down onto the side of your body, squishing you onto the side of the car door that was next to you.

About ten minutes later going about sixty-five miles per hour through the empty streets of Gangnam, the two of you finally pulled up in front of the dirty bar. Gun immediately unbuckled his seatbelt then turned to you, making sure you understood his instructions carefully.

“Stay here. Whatever happens, don’t get out of the car.”

And with those words, he slammed the door right behind him and made sure that the car was locked. You anxiously watched him walk into the bar alone, worried that he might not come out of that bar alive.

Fifteen minutes had passed and you were starting to worry even more. Your hand nervously pressed against your chest, feeling your heart hammering through your chest. At that point, you were debating to yourself whether or not you should go into the bar to retrieve him. You hugged your knees inside the car then laid your head onto your knees sighing. “I hope he’s ok.”

All of a sudden, you heard yelling getting louder from inside the bar. “What’s going on in there?” The front door suddenly bursted open, as a guy came running out from the bar full of blood from head to toe. You realized that the guy was actually Tae. His face was all bruised up as his left eye looked swollen and his bloody nose was left crooked sideways. His uniform was ripped almost to shreds. The stitching on one of his arm sleeves seemed to have been torn right off and one of his pant legs was barely hanging on. Your eyes widened at the sight of Tae quivering in fear on the ground next to the car that you were in.

A loud bam was heard as the door to the bar swung open violently. Another guy flew out through the door then landed flat on the ground, now unconscious. That man had on a brown leather jacket and underneath was a long sleeved cheetah-printed polo shirt. Golden chains were wrapped around his neck and the sight of him reminded you of Ryuji, since they both looked alike. His body was also covered in bruises and stains of blood.

Who could have done this? Wait, it couldn’t be-

The bar’s front door suddenly flew open once again, as you saw someone kick the door open. Outside, came Gun walking out of the bar without a scratch on him. However, a bit of blood splatters was stained on his clothes, his face, and on his hands. While making his way back towards the car, you noticed that he successfully managed to get your luggage back!

Tae’s eyes widened at the sight of the unconscious, bloodied man in front of him being stomped all over by Gun. His body was being walked all over over by him without remorse like he was just some insect. Even while he was rolling your luggage bag behind him, the man on the ground remained unfazed when his body was being violated by your big luggage bag. Tae slowly backed away from Gun as much as possible, until his back met the car door where you were sitting behind it, watching their every move through the tinted window.

Gun stopped in front of Tae. His eyes glared down at him with such a threatening look that it almost caused Tae to urinate in his pants. “Move.”

Tae quickly nodded as he scurried away down the street, yelping like a scared chihuahua. Gun then took your luggage bag and stuffed it in the back trunk of his car. Afterwards, he made his way back to the driver’s seat then closed the door on his side before starting the car.

You were curious about how he managed to even get your belongings back so you asked, “How did you do that?”

Before he started driving again he lit a quick cigarette, with a soft exhale of smoke escaping through his lips. The smell of smoke filled the inside of his car, making you cough a bit but you didn’t mind.

“I just went in there, and spotted that big suitcase of yours from across the bar. That last guy that I just saw was holding onto it while he was talking with his buddies, so I went up to him and just beat him up. It wouldn’t change a thing if I just asked them to hand it over.”

He then switched the gear, then started driving off, heading back towards the direction that he was supposed to go to before he got side-tracked. You just sat there in the backseat trying to process what he just explained. “All you did was just beat him up? But what about the rest of the guys that were with him? Wouldn’t they have done something to you too?”

“They tried to, yeah. But I had to take care of all of them as quickly as possible, since I got other important matters to take care of. There wasn’t much that they could’ve done though. They were all weak in the end anyways.”

“W-what…?”

They were all weak? Who is this guy? And what incredible strength he had. How could he have beaten all of them at once? He was up against so many guys, yet he came out of that alive?

“Then, what happened to their boss? Did you have to fight him too?”

Gun sneered, as he took the cigarette out of his mouth then extinguished it onto the ash tray that laid next to him. “Did you see that other guy that was laying outside of that bar? He made such a good carpet.”

You gasped, clasping your hand onto your mouth in shock.

That was HIM?! Who the hell is this guy, Iron Man? Or- THANOS?!

You weren’t aware of it, but Gun was watching your reaction from the rear view mirror while he was driving. For a split second, he couldn’t help but smile in amusement from your animated facial expressions. “What an amusing woman.” He whispered to himself before his smiled faded back to his original stern face.

The tinted Rolls Royce car sped throughout the night, zooming past every obstacle that couldn’t dare touch Gun’s beloved car.

Finally, the two of you arrived in front of a large modern-styled mansion as he drove through an iron gate that automatically opened on its own. The driveway to his house was very wide and openly convenient. There were short marble steps that led you up towards the door of the mansion, which was accompanied by small traditional Japanese trees on the sides of the steps, that were probably imported from Japan. From above, there was an outdoor balcony that overlooks the open surroundings of his house with a nice view that was probably to-die-for.

The architecture of his home made you gawk widely, fascinated by how large his home was as he parked the car right in front of the driveway. His garage was already filled with other expensive luxury cars, so he decided to park his favorite car in front of his house.

Wide-eyed, your eyes enveloped the scenery of such a lavishly polished home. “This place is so stunning…” you murmured in awe as you exited the car. Gun got your luggage bag from the back trunk then handed it to you, for you to stroll yourself. “This way.” He said in a commanding tone while walking towards the door.

You followed him, still starstruck at how amazing his place looked. You halted right behind him, when he stopped in front of the door to unlock it using a touch-screen passcode lock. When he heard the small door beep a few times, he opened the door to let you in. “Excuse me…” you politely said as you entered the house.

Mother. Of. God.

And you thought the outside of his home was marvelous? Oh, no honey. That was just the cherry on top. The interior was on a whole other level.

It was wide in space. The floor was made out of smooth wooden mahogany planks. A simple wooden staircase stood on the side of the wall, that led all the way up towards the second floor with a steel railing following alongside it. The balcony of the second floor was completely see through, made out of tempered glass, one of the strongest glasses ever made. If you were to look below from the balcony, you could see almost everything from the top floor.

Further down from the front door, there was a lounge area. You would be greeted by a mini bar with high quality alcohol displayed in glass shelves behind the counter. Fancy glass cups were suspended above the counter, glittering spotlessly. Right next to the bar were two pool tables centered behind a big leather sofa surrounding a flat screen TV.

As you made your way past the lounge area, a long rectangular dining table with 12 seats surrounding it stood there in the dining area. A few meters away, was the kitchen. Everything was mostly covered in black and white. The counters. The high-tech stoves. Everything was sleek and clean.

After Gun gave you a tour in the first floor, he took your luggage for you then made you follow him up the stairs. The man was literally carrying your suitcase over his head like it was nothing, which impressed you. He did seem like a gentleman at first, but you couldn’t help but remember that he is still a very dangerous man.

On the second floor, he guided you into an empty room that didn’t seem to be touched at all but was still kept clean. There was a big queen-sized bed with a huge window next to it where you could view the scenery. However, the window was covered with dark curtains that could be pulled back anytime. There was a small wooden bedside table on both sides of the bed, with two lamps on top of them. Right near the door, was a slide-in closet. Across the room was a door that led you into a personal bathroom, which you find very convenient.

Gun set your luggage down next to the closet, then leaned against the wall while crossing his arms. “Alright, time to discuss what you’ll be doing for me while you’re here.”

You sat on the side of the bed, while you curiously stared at him wondering what he had planned for you.

“Tonight, I will work on the contract that I’ll be giving you later on. However, I’ll lay the rules out for you right now. While you are here, make sure you follow my rules, and MY rules alone. No one else’s. Since I have accepted you into my own house for the sake of making you stronger, consider yourself lucky. I wouldn’t have done this in the first place if I thought of you as a nobody, so don’t waste my time. I believe that you have what it takes to be one of the strongest, if you polish your skills the right way through my guidance. While living here temporarily, don’t be loud, don’t annoy me, and don’t cause any trouble. In addition to you staying here, you are not allowed to leave this place unless I give you permission to do so. There will be times when you will be fed breakfast, lunch, and dinner everyday, so make sure to be awake at those times or else you won’t be getting any meals at all. Make sure that you are ready when I get downstairs for your training sessions, which will always start at seven in the morning. Also, don’t let anyone into this house unless I inform you to do so. There will be times when I won’t be home, so even if they do say that they’re associated with me in any way, don’t let them in. And one last thing. Don’t touch anything that belongs to me, except for when you’re in the lounge area, when you’re in the dining room where food will be given to you, or anything else given to you by me. Lastly, don’t ever tell anyone about what happens in this house. Never tell anyone about what you’ve been doing and what our plans are. If you break any of these rules, always expect that there will be consequences. By tomorrow you will receive a physical copy of the contract from me once it has been finished. You’ll have to wait for it so it can be signed properly. Any questions?”

You yawned while nodding.

“Hmph. What is it then?”

“What if I get hungry during times when it’s not even breakfast, lunch, or dinner?”

“Then control your hunger.”

You pouted, while crossing your arms. “So I’ll just starve?”

“You’ll get used to it if you don’t rely on your appetite whenever you have a sudden urge to eat. It won’t be good if you eat regularly whenever you’re not hungry since it’s just going to ruin your appetite.”

“Oh okay. Oh and I have other questions. So, you already know right? The reason why I’m in Korea in the first place was to make money. How can I earn money in Korea if this will be my life temporarily? And why do you want to take me in so badly? Like what’s in it for me? You literally just forced me to be here.”

Gun smirked before closing the door behind him. “Wouldn’t you like to know ‘so badly’?”

Slowly, he made his way towards you in such a sly manner that he made you back up immediately into the bed even further. As he stood closely in front of you, he leaned in closer to you. Both of his arms now pinned onto either side of you on the bed, while trapping you in between his arms. You could feel almost feel his hot breath touch your skin, which smelled of nicotine. He took off his glasses revealing what lied underneath, and your eyes finally met his.

Underneath his glasses were pitch-black orbs with white pupils centered in between each eye. There was a huge scar that ran across his eyes, which must’ve hurt greatly from the looks of it. Stunned, you were left speechless. You couldn’t get a word to escape from your mouth as you stared up at him. It was like you were caught in some kind of spell. You were so drawn to his eyes that, unconsciously, your hand reached his face and touched his cheek. But with fast reflexes, it didn’t even take a few seconds until he grabbed onto your hand then pinned it over your head. Your other hand laid dead still and you felt that hand starting to sweat onto the bed. His right knee was also pinned in between your legs, trapping you under his body.

“What are you trying to do now? Seduce me?”

You quickly shook your head in response.

“You know, I’m starting to think that bringing over a stranger might be bad for me, so listen closely.”

He leaned in very close to your ear, that the side of your heads were parallel from each other. Your heart started beating quicker and quicker every minute that you think that even Gun could hear it from where his face was at. He tucked a few strands of your hair behind your ear for you to listen carefully.

This position…

His forearms were pinned on the sides of your head. His scent made you feel light-headed. His chest was barely touching yours and you felt his breath even closer to your ear that it made your body tingle all over. You could even feel his leg graze slightly against your private part in between your legs, which made your legs all stiff. This was the first time that you’re on a bed with a man that it made your cheeks hot and red like twin tomatoes.

“Think of it as kind of a. . . You-Pay-Me and I-Pay-You situation. The outcome will be Win-Win if we both cooperate with each other. You will help me bring down four of the major power groups in Korea. In exchange, I will grant you anything you want. It can be money, fame, designer clothes, you name it. I’ll turn you into an unstoppable beast. You will even be known as a legend in Korea too.”

“I don’t really care much about all of that, except for the money. But… how will that benefit you?”

He stared deep into your eyes then smirked. “Money and power is all it takes to become the strongest. Once I have destroyed them all, there won’t be anything left for them in which I will be the one to rise to the top. I will shape you into one who’s worthy of fighting. My ultimate secret weapon. They won’t even know what will hit them. Once you have become one of my greatest masterpieces, money won’t be a problem for you anymore.”

Again with the “greatest masterpieces”. Will this really be the best option to help out mom?

“If that’s the case, then you can count me in. I’ll become one of your greatest masterpieces.”

“Finally, then it’s been decided. I’m glad we see eye-to-eye. We’ll negotiate on how much you’ll be given each month tomorrow after our first training session.”

He leaned back and retreated from the bed, leaving you to stare up at the ceiling in a daze. He retrieved his glasses then put them back on. While making his way towards the door, he stopped in front of it while he grasped the door knob.

“Oh, and one more thing. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask. I’ll mostly be in my room, so knock if you need to. Also, give me your phone for a second. I need to give you my number.” He let go of the door knob as he returned back to you.

“Ohhh… right.”

You quickly sat up from the bed then took out your phone from your pocket. You unlocked it before handing it to him, so he could add his number to your contacts. “I’ll need your number too.”

“Ah… alright.”

After the both of you exchanged numbers he said, “Contact me if there’s an emergency.” You nodded when he handed your phone back to you.

Right when he was about to leave the room, the last words he said to you that night was, “Go ahead and get some sleep. It’ll be a busy day for you tomorrow.” Then shuts the door behind him.

Exhausted from everything that has happened that day, you collapsed back onto the bed and sighed.

Ah, I’m such a fool.

Out of nowhere, your belly started grumbling. You forgot that you haven’t eaten anything yet since you arrived in Korea. You sat up once again, then stared at your phone in your hand.

“Is hunger considered an emergency…?”

[End of Ch. I]

203 notes · View notes

m1ckeyb3rry · 2 months

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SHSHSHS HONORARY MUTUAL SHUT UP IM SO HONORED!!!! Also @/i-am-so-strange you’re too kind!!!!! Hsjshsjs always happy to provide more bllk content hehe but also thank YOU for supplying us with that glorious art I really got a kick out of seeing that LMAO I’m ngl stressing hiori is one of my favorites HAHAHA

BRO I LOST IT AT THE YUKI MARIOKART!!! We’re literally being stalked it’s insane….yes Reddit is definitely….a place…..honestly I only really use it when I wanna see non bot reviews for things and occasional bllk news because there’s usually at least one chronically online member active whos posting the latest stuff….

LMAOOOO NO ITS SO FUNNY HAHSGSHAAH ok but that makes more sense I feel like it’d be hard to expand too much on a request like that!! I love how it coincidentally lined up with Isagi being difficult/not as interesting to write about though LMAO

Wait that’s a good point HAHAHA maybe your inner tabieitaken agenda seeped out and you attracted side character enjoyers (me)……is that a sign to slide in secondary main character thoughts /j that is pretty hilarious though……I mean granted I also contributed to the hiori pile a bit when I sent in that like…(wanted to put this note in here that I straight up FORGOT what I wrote omg let’s see how long it takes me to scroll and find that ask I could’ve sworn I wrote it down somewhere but the fact that I don’t remember exactly what I wrote down is kinda embarrassing LMAO)

LMAOOO no because I love the idea of building up ego nation and just leaving like idk those cheesy stories where the lore is like yeah our great founders/creators one day disappeared HAHAHAHAAH I forgot that the man canonically doesn’t do laundry or cook decent food so that’s true too I’m here for the long ride though if you do end up writing that at some point then we can truly become the fake ego nationals LMAOO

MEGUMI I love megumi too omg bruh the recent events in jjk are really not good for the soul someone bring back megumi and his shadow animals :( Ah yes very brief Yuta interlude LMAOO (pi slapped so hard) also SHDJSH GET OUT SHIN AHS MY FAV TOO I also really liked Kija too!! I’m still sad that they didn’t continue with the anime though I heard it’s because it was just promo for the manga? Man. Ok but being converted by content is a little too real it happens to me too often….you know what’s funny. I saw a tiktok roasting Karasu for being number 3 and then like disappearing and I remember saying to my friend “yikes I don’t even like Karasu but why’d they do him so dirty” haha. Ha. I have no idea how it spiraled from there but it was quite literally shortly after that moment. But yeah I’ve definitely been converted by a good edit or piece of art! I’m pretty certain I started liking chigiri after seeing some fanart someone showed me LMAO

No I have full faith in you….you’re cooking in Michelin chef mode…so take your time LMAOOO it really does make me realize yet again that no one is serving Karasu nation like you s2 bring my man some justice….ok genuinely crazy has me really curious like if we’re talking genuinely crazy via Mira standards I’m eyeballing something around 30k (don’t say anything to this LMFAO)

WHEN I TELL YOU I LAUGHED SO HARD “I’d stay downstairs when my brother has friends over” IS SO FUNNY??? I’m actually crying but also agree!! I usually don’t watch as much slice of life to begin with so

the oikawa thing is actually so funny as a running joke now but I think (I’m also not a hardcore hq fan nor have I dipped my toes in the hq circles on social media) it stemmed from people actually thinking oikawa was really mean…? Maybe?? But if that was the case I’m like…..he seems pretty regular to me….seeing people put him next to like Sukuna and Kenjaku though is so hilarious LMAOOO

“#unfortunately idt I am built for the sports manga/anime life” AHAHABAAHHAAHAH you really were in for it LMFAOOOO

The soccer dudebro side of the fandom…ah yes….you know sometimes I forget dudebros actually watch and then I’m painfully reminded by some power scaling tiktok…this is also oddly specific but I remember seeing Maddie on tiktok talk about how she traded some blind bag keychain pull with a dudebro and gave her Kunigami to him for nagi or Reo or some Nagi Reo combo keychain and I really thought to myself like wait dude bros watch and buy merch?? Then I realize it makes sense that he wanted Kunigami LOL

HAHA Honesty translating is so fun and gives me more opportunities to use the target language too so I got you!!! <3 Classic Otoya activities indeed….CHATTER X CHATTER CHEMICAL REACTION IS CRAZY guys we are devouring bllk itself we devoured kaneshiro now he’s gotta give us his seat as bllk creator!!!!!! And also ok good I’m glad LOL I didn’t want to be like rapid fire pinging your inbox and messing up anything HAHAH

Oh…omg…….wait I hope that all worked out ok for you because omg….yeah that’s so awkward and honestly sounds like a nightmare…..hoping you get some platonic male irls too!!! Maybe you just have too much rizz LMFAO well….at least you didn’t find out during the actually dinner ig!

-Karasu anon

LMAOOO idk if i follow you or not but trust i would if i don’t…you’re like one of my tumblr besties atp HAHAHA one of my elite employees 🫡 and YES that art cracked me up poor hiori was struggling

to be honest if i’m looking smth up or i have a question i always go straight to the reddit results…truly it’s the best place for research questions because you can tell by upvotes how accurate smth is and especially if you’re looking for an answer about the contemporary world it’s better to get answers from people who live that experience vs study it!! so i can never be a full reddit hater even if some sections of the community are horrific

HAHAH i think a more focused prompt like that might’ve made me struggle for ANY character but yeah it coinciding w isagi definitely made me do a double take…although i would def write for him again if anyone else ever requested for him LMAOO i just wouldn’t seek out writing him on my own the way i do w tabieita and nagi

LMAOOO i give off a general aura of side character enjoyment 😩🙏🏻 that was back when my blog was only nagi themed too and he’s pretty popular so i’m surprised i didn’t get more reqs for him too!! you can always slide secondary main character thoughts my way 😋😏 but yeah i just found it funny that i’ve gotten more reqs for karasu than literally any other character…maybe too it’s because once i wrote for a side character the people who are into more random characters realized i would write for them and came to req?? vs people who like more popular characters have a wide range of people they can req/read from so they might not even see my blog in the results compared to me being one of very few authors who writes longer fics in the hiori/karasu/otoya/etc tags…idk if that makes sense but it could be one explanation

no because idk if you saw the vol30 color spread with the coaches but why is ego looking lowkey kinda…like sure i’ll join ego nation myself if i must HFJDDNJSSN

OMG YONA OF THE DAWN FAN???? you are officially my fav person ever I LOVEEEE YONA OF THE DAWN I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU ALSO LIKE SHINAH BCKDNFJSDJDMSN WHY ARE WE THE SAME PERSON 😭😭😭 he’s my fav ever omg…besides him i rlly liked hak and soowon 😓 but shinah is my number one my bae my man 👹 forever hoping for a reboot of the show because from what i’ve heard the manga is sooo good and yona is such a well written fmc!! i need them to get mappa level animation and finish the whole show 😔 i’m surprised they haven’t yet it’s one of the most popular mangas i’ve heard?? i know SOOO many people would watch it if it came out plus it would appeal to such a broad audience because it truly has everything 😩 okay sorry for the brief rant i just love yona of the dawn i wish the fandom wasn’t NONEXISTENT because it has so much potential for fics art and analysis!!

i’ve learned to never say i don’t like a character because almost immediately after i WILL fall in love with them!! idek how i started liking karasu because after season one i could not tell you who karasu otoya or any of the others were (i did remember liking yukimiya though)…after i finished the show i was SET on not reading the manga because i thought it wouldn’t be as fun as watching it animated but the same mutual who convinced me to watch the show told me to read the manga and eventually i caved 😩 and that was when i was like “ok lowkey why is karasu so fine…” but it wasn’t until i took a break halfway through third selection to read epinagi that i really became a FAN 🤔 at least i think that’s how it happened HFJDJSN i don’t remember it as well as i remember becoming a fan of nagi (didn’t gaf abt him until i realized i was lowkey giggling at his scenes in team z vs team v…tried to hold out as a rin fan throughout second selection but it was impossible and then i was the number one nagi fan before i knew it)

i will not comment on your prediction 🤐 but michelin star meal OMG i can only hope it’s that good…truly i am doing what i can for karasu nation 😭🙏🏻 laying a foundation for those to come after me (aka his fandom which will surely grow after s2) 🤞🏻 i wonder what his fanon version will look like actually 🤔 are we going to get fboy tabito??? hopefully not because aiku and otoya are right there but bby karasu is a sarcastic dark haired handsome asshole who’s secretly a sweetheart so i do fear he’s going to be bastardized a la the itoshis a bit 😔 at least i can imagine him being flirty even if i do think he’s too much of a loser and undercover loverboy to ever sleep around or anything

i guess by slice of life/chill anime standards oikawa might seem mean?? like he’s nothing compared to sukuna/kenjaku or even kaiser but in comparison to others in the show he might be ruder hence the general perception of him being as such…no idea though 😩 i agree it is funny seeing him in the top villain compilations

LMAOOO I HAD NO IDEA WHAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN TO ME TRULY now i’m in so deep but like i love it…the bllk community on tumblr is also rlly fun and i’ve made so many mutuals/friends because of being active in the fandom which has been awesome!! no regrets for sure

PLEASEEE the dudebros are awful but also hilarious to me like lowkey i love them because they simply are so unreal like NO ONE irl talks like that 😭 one time i commented on a bllk dudebro’s tik tok and my comment was the only one he responded to despite how many of his fellow dudebros also commented…tell me that was the most interaction you’ve had w a woman in weeks without telling me 😓 but also omg the chokehold that kunigami and barou have on dudebros HAHAH i’m always scared to say i like barou because i need to specify it’s NOT in a dudebro way it’s in a “he’s my housewife and i love him very much” way

PLS WE DEVOURED KANESHIRO FR entering destroyer mode now…watch out the tongue’s abt to make an appearance 😩

unfortunately i have a lot of accidental rizz 😔 one time i actually didn’t realize i was on a date (i thought it was a family hangout) until the guy’s mom told us she was leaving so she didn’t third wheel us and then i had to pretend i had a boyfriend so i could escape 😭 that was a crazy day because that guy knew i was in love with his best friend?? so idk what he thought he was doing there…anyways this time i just pretended like my father wasn’t allowing me to hangout with anyone so i got out of it 😪 unfortunately no matter how hard i try to have male friends irl it inevitably ends up with them asking me out and me saying no 💔 one day it will be different i hope 😩

#answered asks

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tinybed · 2 years

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@troll-star atted (@‘d) me for this screeeee (mouse scree) so i will go ahead and @ some of my buddies/ppl i remember : @scalded @gooeykit @unrelenting-usurper @turin-et-geschwind @gelfling (thinking of your fraggle rock posts daily) @lemonmoonlimestar @1teeth @mosquitogirl and if i forgot anyone else its prob cuz your url just didnt come to mind but any1 who sees this can @ me and i’ll read theirs 🐼🎋

Relationship status: i have a boyfriend :)))))) his name is charlie i think some ppl know him already. this morning i was having a really complex nightmare where i was hiding under a chair, then the chair moved and i was like omg thats charlie, not a chair, and i woke up to him hugging me :)

Favourite colour: black, light pink, light blue, seafoam green… and every color that the sky makes

Song stuck in my head: Too Much by J Dilla but now its that song Regulate by Warren G Lol

Last song I listened to: Regulate by Warren G right now i just put it on heh

Three fav foods: strawberries, burger, soup, but recently i’ve been enjoying berries in plain yogurt a lot

Last thing I googled: “hikari name meaning”

Dream trip: i really want to visit japan and see many onsens which i have been wishing for since 2018 when i checked out a book called “onsens of japan” from the library. also i’d love to visit the colloseo in rome because i played assassins creed brotherhood a lot and i just want to see it in real life… haha ^_^

Anything I want right now: i want a puppy i cant stop thinking and talking about it x( and i want some new socks. and an apron. and lots of money to buy my bf shoes LOL (he has some already but i think if i could buy him any pair he wants then i’d be quite the Baller)

ok thanks ✅🎀👭

#@gelfling you might not have been the fraggle rock poster i cant remember but i still remembered U :)

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pinkmoondoll9shihtzu · 5 months

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Hello there 🙏🫶 I just want to share this rn with you..... 💌 Recently i have developed a crush on a girl. She is so wonderful and we talk every day & i feel so giddy LOL. I don't even know her face😭 I am so unsure over alot of things & it is both mortifying & exhilarating to experience .. & thats the fun if it..omg.. recently i feel like so many friends are having crushes i wonde r your thoughts on this..

also i forgot how to flirt entirely so i dnt even know if its noticeable to her at all that im interested that way since i havent been bold enough LOL any advice on signaling this to her is appreciated i feel like13 again likeso clumsy LOL its so exciting too omg wishing you a beautiful day when u reaD this i hope it;s fine to send this to u i know u like your inbox used as a confessional but i'm still shy HAHA

🙏🌞🫶🫧🌈

AWWW💞💞💞 happy for u Anon :]....Ues it seems lately many people have been finding new love, i noticed it too the past few weeks :o I've only had that feeling a handful of times over my life, its a special one cus it can be quite fleeting depending on how fast things move, treasure it🌟 altho W/ me and slimbo it lasted ages so by the end of it when we finally confessed love i was FRIED from haveing butterflies in my stomach for so long lol i was losing my marbles over it. anywyas--

Honeslty im BAD at flirting like. i have noooo idea how to make a move , slimbo n i both tried to keep it .pokerface. for years because we're like, i dont even know, we're stupid we were almost enemies for a while. there was a timespan where we were SOOOO competitive and whenever we tried to play games we'd fight so much and i'd end up crying LMAO im laugjing so hard typing this cus we're not even like that now. Like as soon as we got together we became the ultimate harmonious team of considerate affectionate lovers but the courting phase was such a trainwreck lmao. i love it like its beautiful it all worked out, but yeah i suck at flirting i am swagless in that position🧎‍♀️

Altho when it's irl i definitely at least try to Thot it Up, concoct minxy outfits , move in a charming way, one of my most successful tactics has been attempting to orchestrate accidental voyeuristic scenarios for them to catch in their peripherals lol. but you have to be reeeeally subtle to pull that one off ;] i guess mostly i just try to talk to them a lot !! and be thouggtful. send telepathic uncondtional love. SHOW THEM SONGS!!!!!!! if its an internet thing, maybe u can watch movies or youtube videos together. be inquisitive and ask her lots of questions ^_^ one thing that always drew me to slimbo is how curious they are and their #intellect.. But everyones different so just feel it out day by day thru communication💓💓💓

hhope that helpes in some way.. its ok to feel giddy and clumsy im sure ur crush just wants to get to know the most authentic -you- so dont stress too much about specifics ^u^ Enjoy your weekend love ~ ~ ~ P.M.d.9

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bentosandbox · 1 year

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hoshi headcannons GIMMIE [pwease im starving]

woah how did you know i had some (more) bubbling in my head recently after reading the mh collab (not that she appears in it :( but…yato does) also perfect timing since hoshi module Y is about to drop just dropped on EN

read it NOW!!!!

ok so . shes basically like an old salaryman to me just look at that bow (salute emoji) and with all the salarymen traits that come with that like terrible work life balance(well they are all office workers so. all have this but shes like, THE salaryman you know) nomikai addict (kind of real) and a super yes-man except..nobody dares to even make her do something she wouldn't do herself, and not out of fear(well maybe a little for some) but out of respect (probably saved every officer at least once), and being a senior (since she's been with the lgd since day 0) she could technically treat people like they're beneath her (true) but instead she goes super formal-mode the gapmoe(?) is so endearing its like . suddenly thought of the mc from vinland saga whos like ^_^ im so harmless i wont harm anyone (havent not caught up with it for very long though idk if it's still like that)

she likes to (Module X spoilers I guess) idk roleplay being a pushover??? in that story she tl;dr comes to the rescue of a colleague who is like 'ty oni-sis but you should just leave me here 🥹 and she's like (tanks like a champ getting her ID card cracked in the process module.jpg) and goes 'haha sorry that request is a bit too hard why not i uhh help you apply for a bonus instead' it was here i was like ok hoshichen (in that order) is dead to me she would never yaoitop chen !!!!!!!!!!!!!! basically could be left.jpg but is right.png most of the time

she's old… but how old?? I guess touhou type of old…? the other two are like kids to her at times, maybe sometimes she does an old man act to get them to stop quarrelling like sitting at the window and with a coffee and reading something and telling them 'ok im just going to sit here until you two sort it out ok take your time' (they instantly stop)

her and chen: i think i mentioned this somewhere before but chen = wuxia protag hoshi = her mentor (in some capacities since technically wei was her [absent] mentor) she has all the qualities you would want except like in standard mentor fashion, a little conservative (i really do like this…flaw? because to be content with how the LGD operates, it makes you wonder how things were like before…)

her and swire… i like to think sometimes swire brings That Day up and hoshi is just ^_^ i see! and then after chen is gone maybe swire has some difficulty cleaning up the mess and at times takes out the badge to have a 'what would mysterious officer x do' moment and one time hoshi catches her doing that and uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh omg forgot what i wanted to write here

her and lin: man…………….they didn't seem that hot in ch7 but man the potential interactions of an ex-underworld lackey and current underworld heir where is my food hg where are the ingredients i will cook the food myself but i need the ingredients to start with that one interaction was not enough

(quick spoiler warning for monhun collab) basically only the el gatos and rathalos got isekaid so the village is all higashinese and not like a MH village so you get sprinkles of higashi lore

i bring monhun collab up because yato and noir used to be an assassins but they quit da life and yato mentions 'killing your own kind', talks about her last hit she flaked out on but that that another assassin simply killed the mother and daughter duo she was supposed to kill so i was like damn what if hoshiguma also…?? (they are all oni and we all know she's ex-yakuza) or what if… she was the one that had to do yato's job, the hoshi/yato yaoi would be UNREAL but i dont think HG has the guts

also she and yato are ace because uhhhhhh i said so my rhodes my rules no joke i had wanted to do a hoshiguma dating sim for this year's april fools (with a bunch of other ops too but she would be the 'main' route even though there's no 'good' end) but then uhhh time issue anyway don't forget to set the LGD trio's voices to cantonese

#bentoask #Anonymous #bentotexto #because this one got long

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starsunfirelight · 9 months

Text

Ok so

I was too scared to post this before, but I think I'm going to do it now:

inspiration to finally post this:

youtube

a channel I watch all the time at the end of the year/when I remember/when it gets recommended to me lol

finally validated my opinions, when I thought I was alone

then someone in the comments mentioned a different channel so I thought i'd check it out:

youtube

and things started making a lot of sense. it's like this one person had the common sense that I could feel was missing from seemingly everyone I interacted with (watch videos) on the internet.

So I watch this:

youtube

after another video, and it's one I'd been meaning to watch a lot sooner, but it's been in my watch later for a long time and I guess it just got buried and I forgot about it lol

I never really check the watch later playlist unless I'm really bored and it's something I remember

(I am 100% a Spooky girl by the way (though for a different- I guess not directly but I have the vibes and those are things that I would do if it wasn't for the fact that I can't for some reason (yes I see the hypocrisy here but trust me on this)) and have been aware of it this whole time and it's also the exact type of person that I really hate and I think the word for it for the general public is "poser") (which is way more accurate to what I am imo)

(but like I get where they're all coming from and hope that they can all move on and get a more happier life where they can commit :> not sure what (face expression in the form of an emoticon/emoji) to put here but oh well )

but anyways, here we go!

(copy and pasted from my notes app) (wrote in the style of a YouTube video (at least at first) bc I am not original or creative but I just wanted to have fun lol) (more like have fun complaining and it was really bothering me and I just had to get it out there somehow) (I legit listened to this song for like 3 days straight until I had memorized all of the lyrics before the song would finally leave my head. :[ ) (again with the face thing, wanted to indicate mildly sad but frustrated not disappointed)

thoughts from today:

(the sentiment is totally taken straight from the comment section of the above videos and her performance with the cake being all messed up on SNL recently)

oliv (sic) is good and bad at the same time, but she’s getting better :)

I got target audience hit so hard like wow

olivia needs to learn to “kill” what she doesn’t like and go all in on being herself, :) it’s already happenin :)

still totally hate her producer by the way, if not specifically for these songs

like Blake put 90's(? idk I forget exactly it's been a while since I went obsessively looking for every single reaction video to her new song to see if anyone out there had the same opinion as me, but more as a way to see what opinon I "should" be having which sounds insane, I know, but I can't/ok couldn't help it and now I realize this is just high school glorified 😔 (ok real last edit so far (haha take that edits later) this was something I only begun to notice starting from Casually Explained's video (found via a hasanabi clip on my recommended who I clicked on bc of QT(he's a podcast host with her and his takes are so bad they're funny but I only know found out (have a better idea of now that I grew up more) they're bad because of other streamers but anyways-) https://youtu.be/MspHbnfEGno?si=KiiMRDYPIc9TK-TF) (here's a link to the original full video: https://youtu.be/l4Ioj4BA6N0?si=gUQ3ZeoyZ3DcGXLy) and then this one https://youtu.be/pII6mLdNawk?si=EWSF_g8Pl0fLOXHG and finally make the connection here myself lol)) but anyways put those drums on the track as a backing and it sounded SO MUCH BETTER than the original

so like yeah she definitely has the spirit, she just needs to talk to the right people, trust and learn from them, and have more people say "no" to her.

like seriously, and then she'll be really good!

like I mean it, her tracks are SO CLOSE to being really good, and I can see the idea behind them, that it makes me a little mad

all it needs is just a little creativity, or at least someone who really knows what they are doing and how to best implement it

like people think the production on the 1989 vault tracks left something to be desired and started making their own mixes, and I think that's what people should do with some of olivia rodrigo's music too! ok but like pretty isn't pretty was pretty much perfect so don't mess with that one lol

and also why I think the live performances sometimes sound so much better than the recorded version lol

y'know what? that could be a solution right there!

If you're bad at mixing, just do it live! Then it's all better anyways lol

haha ok time to let you guys see what I wrote when this song came out lol

like I really didn't want to be "that person" who complained about the thing that every teenager loves right now, but now I see that my complaints were valid because it's just a matter of opinion, and it's not the reason I was so mad lol (ok maybe like 0.01% but like I've been through this before and didn't hate the thing that was popular, maybe I was jealous? idk but still my complaints were mostly not for that reason, let's say lol (was looking for 😥 but couldn't find it lol - me from later, still editing this by only adding comments as I think the original should be preserved as much as possible bc it's interesting to look back at ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) 😓😢😭💀👍🙂🐛✨ (man your recently used emojis really tell you a lot about your personality huh))

ok but anyways

here we go lol

the time is from when it was last edited on the notes app

August 3, 2023 at 18:10

hey guys! So, today we’re going to be talking about 4 time Grammy winning musician Olivia Rodrigo’s latest hit single, vampire. This song reached number #1 on the Billboard hot 100 last week, and that’s almost to be expected of an artist like her. It also took YouTube by storm, (since it was sponsored, in part, haha, though I doubt it wouldn’t have blown up anyways) and I’m pretty sure it’s really popular on TikTok as well. (though I wouldn’t know, because I spend all of my time on YouTube shorts instead, lol) Ok now, personally, I liked her last album Sour, so I was excited to see what new song she came up with next! So, curious to see what it was, I checked it out on the trending page and… suffice to say, I was a little disappointed. I mean, it had such good parts, and musically, it was nice and I could tell what she was trying to do, but I mean, lyrically, I just felt like it could be better. Like, I’ve heard Taylor Swift songs in the past, and even if you don’t like her style, you’ve gotta admit she’s really good at writing lyrics. Not only does she convey her thought with such vivid imagery and a poetic stricture, but the words sound really nice to listen to as well. I’m not an English major, so I can’t go into too much depth there, but I’m sure there’s a lot of videos out there that can explain what I mean here. And as a personal anecdote, my 7th grade class was given her lyrics to Red to analyze for an assignment lol. So I mean, there’s one frame of reference for you guys, haha. But getting back to Vampire, her lyrics on there just don’t feel the same. I know they aren’t supposed to, but in its place they should adopt her own style. But to me, it just feels a bit… idk childish? I know I’m not that much older than her, but still. (Turns out she was 19 when she wrote this, which makes so much sense now, and that’s basically still a kid lol.) Taylor and Demi Lovato have both written great lyrics when they were both around her age. But, Taylor is kind of a lyrical poet, and Demi probably had a lot of help, since I looked on the Genius page and it said the song I want to compare later was cowritten by Nikki Williams, who was 25 at the time. So it’s a bit unfair to compare, but we’ll see.

Musically, I maybe I just don’t get pop opera, but I think the transition from piano to full on pop song is cool, but feels a bit misplaced. Like, it sounds like a good idea in concept, but I don’t know if it translated well. (as maybe she or the producer might have hoped.) But aside from that, maybe it’s just me but I think she liked the bridge-like(? idk just guessing here based off of my own feeling) chorus a bit too much, that she ended up relying on it to make the song great. Don’t get me wrong— musically, it’s a great part, and she should definitely be proud of herself for coming up with it as she did, but do you really have to repeat it 3 times?? I can definitely say that that it’s the key defining highlight of the song, but when you repeat it so much, it sounds tiring and overused. Imo People don’t care if you repeat the chorus a lot, because the chorus is almost meant to be repeated, but I really think that it sounds a bit too same when it’s repeated in this context. The beginning too, now that I mention it. But hey, this part could just be my own personal preference, and that’s valid too, I guess, since it’s just my opinion lol.

And also, I heard someone say that the instrumental at the end left them wanting more, and I agree that it felt like it ended abruptly, and either it should have ended sooner, or maybe padded out a bit more? idk, but the ending just felt abrupt.

But I do have to say, I really liked the bridge part, and the rest of the song after. I just wish the whole song was good! I mean, imo they should have gone harder on the dramatic angle of it all, like maybe have her in black and white with red lipstick at the piano or something. Extend the craziness of her mind, even if she wasn’t? I don’t know haha, I don’t relate to the song, so this again this is probably just a personal preference. (lol Otto)

Especially the “girls your age know better” part was fire!!!! :)

Also, it sounds kind of like her previous songs, but that’s not really anything to worry about imo, because all artists are a bit privy to that, she said that’s what she was going for, in which case she nailed the “same but kinda different” kind of thing, and it’s not a bad thing imo.

But, I guess, now it’s time to look at the ;lyrics. (warning, I think some of it is childish and a bit cringe. if not, just hoping it could be better :(. )

Now, I know that writing good lyrics really doesn’t have to do with age, but more about your own maturity, and your maturity as a writer. I know it’s a bit unfair to compare as I made those comparisons before, but if you look into the lyrics a bit, hopefully you’ll start to see what I mean.

without further ado, here we go…

I ʜᴀᴛᴇ ᴛᴏ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴛʜᴇ sᴀᴛɪsғᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ Asᴋɪɴɢ, “Hᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴅᴏɪɴɢ ɴᴏᴡ?” “Hᴏᴡ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀsᴛʟᴇ ʙᴜɪʟᴛ ᴏғғ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʀᴇᴛᴇɴᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴄᴀʀᴇ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ?” Jᴜsᴛ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ Lᴏᴏᴋ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴄᴏᴏʟ ɢᴜʏ, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ

Ok, so this isn’t too bad, (now after listening about 100 times I like the first 4 lines! :D) but “Lᴏᴏᴋ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴄᴏᴏʟ ɢᴜʏ, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ” sounds a bit playful, if not childish. If she’s taking on a childish tone on purpose because she’s still very “naive” as she mentions later, then I have to commend her for her genius. But also, it might show up unintentionally, as she mentioned that this song just came out of her head one day after a bad experience, so as a child, this might be just how she thinks, and on the spot, this is what she thought of. It makes me kind of miffed, and it’s a bit hard to listen to, but you can’t really blame her at the end of the day. Plus it sounds kind of cool! :D lkokolololol <- me on no sleep

I sᴇᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴇs ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅɪᴀᴍᴏɴᴅs sᴏᴍᴇᴛɪᴍᴇs ᴡʜᴇɴ I ᴄʟᴏsᴇ ᴍʏ ᴇʏᴇs Sɪx ᴍᴏɴᴛʜs ᴏғ ᴛᴏʀᴛᴜʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴀs sᴏᴍᴇ ғᴏʀʙɪᴅᴅᴇɴ ᴘᴀʀᴀᴅɪsᴇ I ʟᴏᴠᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʀᴜʟʏ Yᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛᴛᴀ ʟᴀᴜɢʜ ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛᴜᴘɪᴅɪᴛʏ

Yo, can we take some time to take in the scenery? No? Ok, I guess that’s ok, and I’lll be in my own corner doing that I guess, lol :D (also comes up later, but that point it’s slow and I think it’s— you’ll find out later :))

Again, it’s fine, maybe trying a bit too hard, but the one thing that makes me mad is “stupidity”. It sounds so childish compared to the rest of the lyrics there, and I can’t think of a better lyric off of the top of my head, but I just know I wouldn’t use that word there— it gives me the ick, if you know what I mean.

it has real “they ask you how you are, and you just have to say you're fine when you're not really fine, but you just can't get into it, because they would never understand.” vibes lol.

here’s the chorus!! (though it feels like a bridge imo until the last two lines, but maybe that’s just the genre haha)

<3 love it sm omg !!! heart heart heart!!! :)

‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ

mentions the theme at the end, yay! lol like it wasn’t present before haha

and here comes my theory that the management wanted this part to take off on TikTok all along, because it’s really good (musically imo) but didn’t really put as much attention on the rest? Like girl, I thought we were on the same page about hating songs only made for TikTok! really short, and only having one good part, like you can tell!

Like “If We Ever Broke Up” by Mae Stephens is the perfect _counter_ to this argument, because it got popular on TikTok and every part of that song is catchy and good, and I think the whole song is perfect. But then again, it’s also kind of short, but also I don’t think it needs to be longer, because then it’s overdone.

But maybe the way Vampire was written was just because it was difficult to come up with! Idk, but I think it could really be due to anything, and I can’t say for sure, I know that. But anyways, I think lyrically, it’s a bit weak. and the ending made me want to listen to it more, which is a TikTok move, but also just because the song has some really good parts in it, which is just because the song is nice and not a TikTok move I don’t think haha :)

Honestly, “‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs” has kind of the same energy as “For one day, one day / I was really, really, really, really sad” by One Whole Day by Dixie D’Amelio. And she didn’t even write that song!

and so every time I hear that lyric, I get kind of cringe, it’s a bit sad. :( lol

but now I don’t mind after listening to it for like the 100th time lol

Moving on…

“Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ” this line is fine, and it would probably be fine among a sea of other lines that are better, but even still, it would be the weakest out of those lines, but satisfying nonetheless.

This song may be musically satisfying, but lyrically, it’s not. (edit, again, after listening to it about 100 times, I now don’t care about most of it but “dream crusher” still sounds cringe, but the go version probably isn’t.) I may not understand the pain, and I understand that in the middle of writing this song, she was probably thinking about her own emotional pain and not really caring about the lyrics, so I get why it’s like this, and I don’t mind one bit, because that’s her song. And, I mean, She probably wouldn’t have released it of she didn’t like it. haha, unless she was rushed? idk. probably not though!

But still, if you take that aspect away, it’s a bit hard to visualize, appearing weak at times, with a tell not show kind of approach, and at other times it feels like she’s trying too hard, giving the whole song an amateur kind of feel. But Sour wasn’t like this, and I just can’t get why. Like good 4 u had a lot of repetition too, but that was fine, because it felt like that part that was repeated was _meant_ to be repeated, and it was satisfying when it did. You knew what to expect, and it was a little predicable but that was fine. It was nice, even. But this song feels predictable in a kinda bad way, and I don’t really understand why. :(

Ok, back to looking at the lyrics, lol.

“I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ”

These lines are fire, and I like them. :) Not trying too hard, but not too weak either. It’s great :)

“I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ”

These lines make it sound like she still is very much naive, even if she didn’t mean it to sound that way. It’s also very her, especially in the way that she phrased it while singing, so I have to give her credit for that. Maybe this one is just a personal preference, for me lol Like maybe it rings true for her because it was and it’s just something that I’ve never thought about lol :)

Listening back, it sounds more like a facepalm than anything.

More lyrics…

“Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ”

Ok, this part just sounds like she is trying too hard, which just makes me sad :(

Like I get imagery, for imagery’s sake, and like she really wanted to make this work, but still, I believe you’ll find the right balance someday as you mature as an artist and a person! :D I believe in you!!! <3

“Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ”

“Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ”

I like this part, especially the rhythmic feel to it as the song speeds up later. I think the clean version is a bit silly though, and having the not clean version in the second line really delivers the impact. Though that same impact isn’t really felt for me in the first line, and “ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ” had more impact than when she used the bad word I think trying to have an impact (but that could also be just because I don’t know the context of that word, or it just sounds weird coming from a child like her, not really understanding the power that that word holds, but still wants people to take her seriously and think of her as a person who uses that word like “I’m not the kid that you think I am”). Haha, at this point I think she has more impact when she writes from the heart and isn’t trying lol. But that could be totally untrue, but it would be funny lol.

“Aɴᴅ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ɢɪʀʟ I ᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴛᴀʟᴋᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ Tᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ʙᴀᴅ, ʙᴀᴅ ɴᴇᴡs Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ Gᴏᴅ, I ʜᴀᴛᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ I ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ ᴛᴏᴏ Yᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ sᴏ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄɪɴɢ”

This sounds like classic high school drama from one perspective, but like her friends really care about her, from another.

Musically, I wish it was more different than the opening, but I guess changing the beat kind of does that haha. It’s not bad, I guess. :0

“Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜᴏᴜᴛ ғʟɪɴᴄʜɪɴɢ?”

What does this mean? Is this just there for the rhyme?

Like, if you’re only going for rhyme, I found this in the BuzzFeed article I was reading earlier of of curiosity “"Maybe then we could pretend / There's no gravity in the words we write / Maybe you didn't mean it / Maybe "blonde" was the only rhyme."” -Skin by Sabrina Carpenter

which I thought was way better lyrics than most of Olivia Rodrigo’s entire song Vampire. Just looking at the lyrics, and has nothing to do with their personal relationship, as I don’t really know about that.

But then again, maybe I was just too harsh, and this is just a reference to something that I don’t understand. Like I wouldn’t personally think about “flinching” when it comes to lying unless it was under a very specific context, but maybe that’s what Olivia Rodrigo is hinting at here, without explaining the whole story.

“(Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ?)”

Initially I thought Again, trying a bit too hard here, or maybe it didn’t really come across, but I like the idea that they were going for.

But after reanalyzing the line before this, it makes more sense in that context, and also explains why she would be really hurt here. Especially because she repeats the line a lot, maybe meaning that he lied multiple times and really hurt her to make her want to repeat that line that much.

“Oʜ, ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴍᴇsᴍᴇʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴘᴀʀᴀʟʏᴢɪɴɢ, ᴛʀᴀɢɪᴄ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛʜʀɪʟʟ Cᴀɴ’ᴛ ғɪɢᴜʀᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏ ɪᴛ Aɴᴅ Gᴏᴅ ᴋɴᴏᴡs I ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴡɪʟʟ Wᴇɴᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ʜᴇʀ ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ɢɪʀʟs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀɢᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ”

This part is nice, “Oʜ, ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴍᴇsᴍᴇʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴘᴀʀᴀʟʏᴢɪɴɢ, ᴛʀᴀɢɪᴄ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛʜʀɪʟʟ” is kind of a lot to say at once, but I can respect it, it’s kind of like a emotion cake lol. “‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ɢɪʀʟs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀɢᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ” :) those two last lines remind of her last album, and she does it so well here. :)

The bridge and chorus again sound epic with the increased tension from the instrumental :)

“Yᴏᴜ sᴀɪᴅ, “Iᴛ ᴡᴀs ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇ”, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅɴ’ᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʙᴇ ʜᴀʀᴅ? Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ, ‘ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴍᴇᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ I ᴛʀɪᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴇʟᴘ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏᴜᴛ, ɴᴏᴡ I ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ I ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪɴɢ I’ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ”

Now this really feels like her old album, and I really like this part :)

It’s really good, maintains her style lol, and no notes from me here :)

this part emotion makes up for aaall of the lyrics haha :)

or maybe that’s the lyrics? rhythm? idk, I just like this part, haha :)

“Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ, ‘ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴍᴇᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ” especially goes hard, and she’s finally writing in a way that’s not only really good poetry but sounds good to hear! I’m so glad! But she doesn’t have to do this if she doesn’t have to, I just think it’s cool that she did it here, haha

At first I was like did you really have to repeat the iconic part a third time? or is it the chorus at this point? Or was it all along? (yes) :thinking: emoji, but after a while, it’s not that bad. It rocks! And only listening to the last part of the song is epic!!!!!! :D the leadup, however it was executed, was worth it, haha :)

Overall, this song is not bad, great at times, even, but I just wish it was better because I get frustrated at its potential, especially because it reminds me of other songs that are really great at times like Heart Attack by Demi Lovato, and I really love that song, and it makes me frustrated that this song isn’t that one :(. After the “‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪɴɢ I’ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ” I’d often go into the chorus from Heart Attack lol :).

But seriously, Like, I get your range is limited, and it’s all about holding in that tension and not letting it go until the line drops (you know the one), but would it kill mainstream music to not hover around the same three notes every time? I’ve noticed it was a problem since Halsey’s “Without Me”, where I really felt that, (editor me from now stepping in to say that I didn't think of this, I just held it in my brain from another youtube video that I had watched years ago but then thought I should "agree" with it without really knowing about what I really thought (based on actually listening to the music) myself lol but then again I did notice it a bit more after I had it pointed out to me, mostly in Halsey - Without Me and Katy Perry - Never Really Over but that last one kinda I had the thought myself a bit at first but then I watched another youtube video and they really pointed to it there as the "death of pop music" but maybe not necessarily with the repeating/range I think idk it was a long time ago and I also liked Paramore - Hard Times a lot at this time but anyways) but maybe it’s just a stylistic choice that I got frustrated by lol, and in general all music isn’t like that. idk about this to say any more.

alright, I think that’s all of my thoughts about this song. ok bye! have a good night/day! :)

Oh wait one more thing. I want to address stan culture, the thing that I wanted to make this video about the most. You see, if you’ve noticed, on the comment section of this song, in most places that I looked, it was hard to find a single comment that was even sightly negative. Now, this could just mean that it’s a good song, but given the complaints I just had that I talked about earlier, it was hard for me to believe that was the case. In fact, that was what kind of started this whole thing, lol. But then, as I looked a bit further on the reviews for the iTunes store, I saw that there were a few people that had the same complaints as I did. There were very few “nope”/“bad song”’s. You don’t like the song? Maybe you’re just not a fan of the genre as a whole, and that’s ok. It’s always (I think) ok to have an opinion. It’s too “copy and paste”? Not original, but still good? Yeah ok, but still, they didn’t comment on whether it was bad or good, and the others admitted it was still good. idk if it’s good to copy and paste or not, but it might e subconscious, and imo who cares (besides the record labels) (as long as you give credit) because it can end up with some really fun music out of it! :) The other comments said it was rushed and it sounded like an amateur. This is something that I kind of talked about in the section before, and if it’s true then I really hope she gets better! :) And a few people were like “meh”, essentially, and still though admitted it was good in some way. So, I guess most of the internet agrees it’s good, just some of us hoping for better.

Now, the really interesting part happened when I looked at another video by a different artist, for just another reason, not really related to this, just kind of happened to see it by chance. It was Taylor Swift’s Anti Hero lyric video, and in the comments, most of them were positive too. But, they were positive in a different way. Both positive, don’t worry :)

Taylor: I love the lyricism, even if you don’t like her you gotta admit it’s good, I relate heavily to this, and just generally pointing out a certain lyric that they like, with some fans just being a fan of the artist. But most people I think were there just () for the song.

Olivia: Kind of the same vibes, but more people liking “omg olivia you’re awesome I can’t believe you did this so proud of you!” which is great but also can lean towards stan behavior (:/), and also “I just love how she sings with emotion”. :) and occasionally “that one line hits really hard.” (hey, I said that too! glad we agree :)) (editor me here to say that I took those comments to heart and formed my own opinion after hearing theirs) But there were also people who were like “I really resonate with this song” “thank you for helping me get through a tough time” and feeling cathartic, which is really nice to see :’)

So, future fans, I advise you to be civil, and maybe not just blindly support your favorite artist because you like them as a person or like their past work. This is just a reminder, just because you like an artist, or even just one song by an artist, doesn’t mean you have to like every sing one of their songs, or go to great lengths to defend them of any wrong lol. You should personally not be responsible for the financial success of your favorite artist. Just tell your friends, but if they’re not into it, leave it alone, chill. If you like it, then you buy the song. If you like it, you listen to the song. that’s really it.

just be happy :)

just be you :)

it’s ok to have an opinion! even if it’s different from people that you love! (unless it’s a super serious important one that’s just mean or something, then hopefully you can try to respect others even if you don’t agree, and try to see other’s pov I hope again unless it’s really bad)

otherwise the world would be boring lol (I mean about having different opinions from one another)

also absolutely no hate to the teens and people that needed this song the most <3 hope you’re ok 😭👍

ohh maybe

(I feel a disconnect with this song) bc teens relate to this song and I’m not a teen anymore. ok, yeah, that explains a lot haha. :0 :)

I’ve always wanted to let the world “let teens be teens”, and give them a lot of love as they grow up, and it looks like it’s finally happening :)))

this song is addictive fs, at least it definitely is/was for me

also it’s funny how she was a fake celeb and now she’s a real internet celeb, and that’s funny lol

I don’t have to like this song, nor do I have to force other people to like it too.

teens like it. let em be.

(ok editor me here, this is the part where I was jotting down random thoughts as I had them, kind of like a notebook lol)

y’know I like this song but I feel like it’s missing something…

I just feel like if she used jazz chords instead of the normal boring generic ones she’s already used before, it could be a much cooler song! Like driver’s license was meant to be generic, and the chords work well there, but this feels like it could use something more!!!!

Oh, ok, I see the Queen inspo now. (editor me, this was in response much later to reading a comment that said so lol, bc I didn't hear it at first lol)

Also explains why everyone likes it, haha xD

it’s like her own style combined with their’s

Like songs

Heart Attack

Some piano ballad - Queen, Taylor Swift

Senorita

Paramore

Avril Lavigne

Gothic/Victorian

Emo - the last two lines of the chorus

Birthday - Katy Perry

ABBA, duh!

Miley Cyrus

BTR (I think, probably just the vibes of the genre)\

Lewis Capaldi

used to ba a sad boy with (idk just lyrics) are jepson era

Without Me - Halsey ^

Pink

Linkin Park

it needs more 💖aesthetic 💓💝💘!!!! ❣️💝❤️‍🩹(couldn’t find the sparkles lol)

Piano Ballad/Queen

(editor me, this is where I pasted the original lyrics and jotted down some of my thoughts there lol, so it's kind of like a "behind the scenes" of the YouTube video lol)

(editor me, but also more of in the notebooks vein where it's what I "cut out" from the video lol to stay on topic/not make it too long winded but here I am writing about it here lol (gosh I really hated part of this song, and I still kinda do, and I'm not going to deny it/hide it anymore because that is what I feel is the right thing to do) (but like not going to bring it up when nobody asked lol, except I guess this could be different lol since _I_ asked and I can post whatever I want as long as I think it's ok and hopefully not being unfair/mean 😥))

(editor me here, also this was me desperately trying to find what this reminded me of, and I was struggling really hard here lol (still am kinda miffed about that, but I chose to accept it and move on after I calmed down caring about this song lol, who knows maybe I'll start looking again by listening to more songs about (I mean in!) that era, haha (*insert indescribable emotion here*) (by me rn at least, :/)))

(editor me from a little later, also went back and saw that I was trying to improve it, so I guess that these were my initial frustrations with the song, or might have been from either before or after or both from when I wrote the whole YouTube video

ok I definitely remember coming back and adding to the list OFTEN as I thought of more, plus I looked up the lyrics in the process of writing the YouTube video, so I guess it was after, after all :) (me being happy I figured it out, NOt being happy about the song >:( ok I'm not that mean (or am I? 🤨 sounds fun actually lol) but didn't want it to be the sad emoticon :( <- ok now I'm a bit sad about the situation, again not the song lol (I don't think? maybe? I mean I suppose since I did say I was a bit sad earlier and I think I still feel that way about the song plus it's a "sad" song so...) (ok stop writing now the sleepiness is really kicking in right about now) )

)

(editor me again, I know you said stop but this is the last one I think, yeah I definitely found the lyrics again and pasted them here _after_ I was done writing my whole video up there, just so I could analyze them in the way that I mentioned before lol)

(still editor me here yeah and I would re paste certain parts and they reminded me of things, as I saw fit) (mmhm yes I am aware I sound like a derange obsessed lunatic and that's because I kind of was) (editor me still, don't worry now I have a love hate kinda thinking towards her lol, and have grown up a bit and try really hard not to be like the fans here, y'know fandom rememberings and what not sheesh the name-shall-npt-be-mentioned fandom is like REally bad and is like this one but like is just BAD on a lot of levels, I think it's worse (than this) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0a4yt5h5rRg like the problem is their behavior, not the content or I'd argue even the fans themselves, necessarily, the problem is when it goes too far 🙁 bit a bit more ^, like 😕 one side for both (the aforementioned side could be either, depends on the mood but both are ok ), slight frown :/)

(editior me, ok this is last now, please, yeah it's just me basically trying my best to improve the song, I think, or at least that's how the latest draft of all this reads to me anyways lol)

(still editor me, like at the time I didn't know if I wanted it this way because it was what I stereotypically "expected to hear", or just because it sounded cool (anyways it was still what _I_ expected to hear/would do, given the opportunity, I was really thinking of what would make me happy here, looking for outside influences on top of that + seeing if they match what I hear/the vibe I'm going for in my head like yes! no, maybe and all that))

Same, bit of Taylor Swift, especially in the chords

but also her own style I guess

Definitely her own style, or I just can’t tell what it’s copying (opera!!! :))

I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ

Paramore Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Avril Lavigne

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ

Her style, more tension rising buildup in the instrumental, pop ->

This is something but can’t figure out what it is

“(Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ? Hᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴇ?)”

More emo? idk leading up towards a genre change (makes sense from a theatre perspective) (editor me, I had just heard a comment/maybe it was a (reaction?) video or both say that this was inspired by theatre and was like ohhh, that makes a lot of sense actually)

“Oʜ, ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ᴍᴇsᴍᴇʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴘᴀʀᴀʟʏᴢɪɴɢ, ᴛʀᴀɢɪᴄ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛʜʀɪʟʟ Cᴀɴ’ᴛ ғɪɢᴜʀᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏ ɪᴛ Aɴᴅ Gᴏᴅ ᴋɴᴏᴡs I ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴡɪʟʟ Wᴇɴᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ʜᴇʀ ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ɢɪʀʟs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀɢᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ” -add a sick drum line after this

Victorian/Gothic (imagine the background music and she’s running away) (or else if it’s positive it could pass as emo)

either way this part sounds cool, because of the way she sings it and builds the rising tension

‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ -> hit the minor key or the 2nd or the 5th or the 7th or sustained or whatever that chord is, like I said, makes the song cool! I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

Paramore Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Avril Lavigne

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ -> country? for some reason? :)?

This is classic her style, I would say Taylor Swift but this is her style that’s inspired

“Yᴏᴜ sᴀɪᴅ, “Iᴛ ᴡᴀs ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇ”, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅɴ’ᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʙᴇ ʜᴀʀᴅ? Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ, ‘ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴍᴇᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴅ ᴀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ <- expect a run here for some reason, but then it’s cool but not her style? I ᴛʀɪᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴇʟᴘ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏᴜᴛ, ɴᴏᴡ I ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ I ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ <- a darker sound? ‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ’s ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪɴɢ I’ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ”

Now this is more pop/emo/her style, which is cool because it’s like the final act of the play, ABBA! :)

‘Cᴀᴜsᴇ I’ᴠᴇ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ sᴏᴍᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʙɪɢ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇs -> piano glissando, elton john, very dramatic Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ғɪɴᴇ -> twist a crystal ball that’s dark blue as the protagonist runs away in fear I sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ’ᴠᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ɪᴛ ᴡᴀs sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ Yᴏᴜ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀᴛ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ Tʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛs -> sees shadow As ʏᴏᴜ sᴜɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ -> shadow

Paramore Oʜ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅsᴜᴄᴋᴇʀ, ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴄʀᴜsʜᴇʀ

Avril Lavigne

Bʟᴇᴇᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅʀʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ … ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ

end on cymbals + and a guitar

hmm “play”…. it sounds theatrical, I guess :)

Someone analyze this further please TT hands /\

https://youtu.be/PdTg-JT8FPM is pretty good :) but not complete, more could be said!!!

>hates song

>proceeds to listen to sing for 3 consecutive days

(now 4)

I appreciate the lyricism, it works wonderfully on the stage :) (red curtains emoji)

haha kool-aid is funny

“Lᴏᴏᴋ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴄᴏᴏʟ ɢᴜʏ, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ”

“I ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ I ᴡᴀs sᴍᴀʀᴛ Bᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋ sᴏ ɴᴀɪ̈ᴠᴇ”

most of the song is just her being helpless(not really), sad, and most of all confused, but this really proves her innocence, and that she’s a good person, (editor me, clear projection here, if it just wasn't _me_ being naïve, if that wasn't already obvious lol) because maybe they would say the second lines, but they would never say the first line even as a joke if they were not a good person

mean TT

where’s the 2000’s drums at???

what on earth is rocky horror picture show

ok so the final genre is rock

it makes sense now, and is not in fact repetitive

paid(editor me, this was an autocorrect of p!atd though I don't think I saw the autocorrect until now ) vibes apparently -reaction video from a video with two people (editor me, I think it was one where they were old white dudes with a purple background who listened to mainly metal, but I could be wrong on this)

playlist is 2000’s indie (editor me, I was researching olivia's inspiration and she said her playlist was this lol or at least the comments did, lol)

its in minor

all of this could have been summed down to “I don’t like the new drummer”.

the parts that aren’t her sound like Selena Gomez :) Like, they could collaborate and it would be neat :)

I guess I don’t like the vocal technique because even if it wasn’t billie’s style I thought it sounded more mellow? idk

Lorde??? I guess, but don’t really see it much beyond the opening/structure of things (editor me, yeah, this was definitely a reaction to a comment and I see it now haha)

Songs that belong on a playlist

Vampire

Better Than Revenge

good 4 u

paid or something paramore???? idk just what was on the radio

oh, that one similar song, ok

enchanted to meet you

rolling in the deep? idk

mine tv

icona pop “i don’t care”

taylor swift look what you made me do (on spot/hits the spot/pinpoint accuracy)

tove lo

katy perry - teenage dream

needs more guitar

"the song was a tissue of threadbare clichés" -google for threadbare (editor me I think I miiiight have read this on a comment on apple iTunes reviews, because I definitely did not know that word before)

nice lol haha totally not this one amirite :) (ominous smile) (you should be concerned) (about me, not you) (thankfully) haha

ok I made a playlist on spotify ✨nuf said ✨💐🪷

this is tearing my soul away :D (never thought this was possible, so this is cool lol)

—the centrol theme is people sobbing in their songs—

also teenagers being teenagers, or at least music targeted towards them

why hate?

-emo

-billie eilith

-teenagers

-almost sampled but not quite

-the way words are pronounced

-straight up the production

-“cool” = cringe? (to adults? lol haha)

-maybe that last point is really it :)

-“look at me I’m important”

-fire this drummer

-also consider help for the producer

-overused, cliche, generic, boring <— this is it for sure, I think

-not enough out of the ordinary/expected

-make it stop pls

-imo the last part is better bc she has more confidence :)

-Olivia Rodrigo Vampire - Creativity Don't Pay Reaction I agree it’s trying too hard and going nowhere

-also on the fact that it appears that she’s trying to be edgy - “The swearing to me seems forced and unnecessary and trying to be edgy.” also see “I'm ancient so not the demographic it's aimed at.” “ I maintain that it's not particularly inspired songwriting or production in my opinion.”? “ it's an unfair comparison,” also true

no hate

-but she’s got a good spirit :)

#olivia rodrigo #vampire #Youtube

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weaksspot · 1 year

Note

I have been enjoying your live blogs immensely even though i myself don't have enough context for late late seasons. Since you've been going through it recently, I am curious to know how you view early s13 episodes that get called "widower arc" by d/c shippers. They really bring it as the proof that Dean CANNOT live without Cas, while he can move on from Sam but now that I'm reaching there, I'm a bit confused 'cause Dean lost more than just Cas at end of s12? I would love to know your thoughts on this part of the show because I still get a bit of anxiety about watching any further...

hello beloved anon omg i'm so pleased someone is getting something out of my liveblogging <3 haha. sorry it took me a little while to get to this - it feels like actually forever since i watched 12/13 and i'll admit right now that i was not watching them with my full focus. so take that into consideration haha

but okay i would not worry about watching further. the show does not suddenly become a destiel fest in late late seasons - if anything i feel like it's this strange combination of "ah shit we should do something with castiel" and "we can't actually think of anything to do with castiel" so he's THERE, but like, irregularly. and while NOW, in 15 (maybe also late 14? they blur) there is starting to be some "ok they're setting up for cass to have confirmed romantic feelings for dean" it's very much... uh... in the background. genuinely doing my best to be objective and use neither my wincestie goggles OR my destiel-hater goggles but silly domestic brothers are definitely still at the forefront and i assume that will remain the same up to the finale.

as for a widower arc... um, well, again my memories of early s13 are not super crystal clear. i actually had to go back and rewatch a little to remind myself what was going on because i forgot cass even died then lol. you know where my focus is. but like you said anon dean lost so much at the end of 12 and like, in general that whole season was kind of a headwreck. i think he was already in a bad place and then lost yet another person that had been in his life long-term. we KNOW dean doesn't do well losing anything that's been in his life for a while which makes complete sense given, you know, his life. lol. he's cut up about cass because he has lost yet another friend. nothing about it suggests "widower" to me - ESPECIALLY not compared to how he "coped" whenever he lost sam. again, trying my best to be objective but i don't see it, lol. i think it's a fanon interpretation that suits the ship, which is fine if you're into it but if you're not - like, i wouldn't be watching it going "god damn, i wasn't a destiel believer before, but dean is clearly grieving him like a widower! the scales have fallen from my eyes! deancas forever" lmao

also, like, when they ARE reunited the response is kind of tragically one-sided dkfjgh. dean is happy to have him back clearly but their relationship settles down again very fast and dean goes back to like. uh. what i personally can't read as anything other than viewing cass as one or two shades more important than like, the family dog. SORRY i know that's harsh and they are friends. but their interactions are so sparse and dean is so unbothered lately lmao which you cannot convince me is down to repression. he just has other priorities!!!! (sammy)

okay i hope this wasn't too incoherent. don't worry about watching further!! there are tangents like there have been for the last like, 10 seasons but all in all. it's brothers front and centre forever. and there are enough sweet moments imo to keep you going even when the show is not so good (been saying this to myself since like, s7. if i can do it anyone can do it). just think of the 14x12 hug. all things are possible through the power of the 14x12 hug

#asks #thank you love you<33

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pesterloglog · 7 months

Text

Roxy Lalonde, John Egbert, Harry Anderson Egbert

Candy, page 38

ROXY: sup john

ROXY: long time no see

ROXY: well alright then pal

ROXY: i do believe u know the way to the living room

JOHN: yeah, yep.

JOHN: thanks.

JOHN: sorry for staring like an idiot.

JOHN: it’s...

JOHN: i just got done with a whole week of feeling weird about hanging out in my dad’s old house again.

JOHN: I kind of forgot to think about how it would be surreal coming back here, too.

JOHN: some kind of nostalgia whiplash, i guess.

ROXY: fair enough yo

ROXY: harry andersons out if u were wonderin

ROXY: hell scoot back home later so if you make it thru round 1 of awkward ex-family convos im happy to say you can be rewarded with another

JOHN: oh, cool.

JOHN: i’d like to see him, if…

JOHN: if it’s okay with both of you.

ROXY: ya we chatted bout it

ROXY: but like i said

ROXY: one thing at a time

ROXY: lets me n u tear this ol egbert/lalonde estrangement band-aid right the fuck off n see what we got goin on underneath it

JOHN: sounds like a plan.

JOHN: so, uh.

JOHN: i’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently.

JOHN: and i’ve realized some things.

JOHN: some stuff that involves you and some that doesn’t, but all things i think you deserve to know.

JOHN: whew.

JOHN: ok lemme think where to start...

JOHN: you know how jake left jane?

JOHN: i mean, i assume you know.

JOHN: though, uh, no offense, but jane’s version might be...

JOHN: skewed.

ROXY: oh lmao nah i didnt hear it from janey

ROXY: harry anderson filled me in on wat he got thru the teen grapevine

JOHN: oh!

JOHN: are you guys not...

JOHN: nevermind.

JOHN: i’m sorry, i came to apologize for my shit, not pry into your business.

JOHN: we don’t have to talk about jane if you don’t want to.

ROXY: janey n me havent been super tight of late

JOHN: ah.

JOHN: what about politics not coming between friends and all that?

ROXY: lmao well turns out sometimes someones politics make it p clear what kind of friends they value

ROXY: or dont

ROXY: and idk sometimes people you used to like when you were a teen grow up to be assholes or w/e!!

ROXY: i think i was clingin to somethin just to prove to myself that i was doin stuff right

ROXY: ol rolal

ROXY: hella normal

ROXY: v good at sticking with friends

ROXY: the more i thought abt it the more i figured holdin on to that one thing made me lose out on some other shit

ROXY: u might relate

JOHN: haha, you got me there i guess.

ROXY: anyways

ROXY: im not tryna take up all ur big speech time w/ my stuff

ROXY: you were tellin me about how jake n janey finally went splitsways and how it gave you some kind of epiphany

JOHN: no, it’s cool!

JOHN: i’m glad to hear it.

JOHN: we can come back to your shit after my shit, maybe.

JOHN: but yeah, jake, he uh...

JOHN: he and tavros are living with me now.

JOHN: i think for the foreseeable future. we were expecting jane to have kind of a fit about it, but all we’ve gotten so far are some divorce papers.

JOHN: if she knows where jake is and she hasn’t had a drone fleet dispatched to nuke my house off the planet i think that’s a good sign she’s actually just letting them go?

JOHN: which is kind of surprising, but, uh. good, i guess.

ROXY: ok ill b the first 2 admit that janes turned into kind of a jerk lately but u no shes not actually like

ROXY: literally evil

ROXY: lol

JOHN: that’s debatable!

ROXY: sry to disappoint but janes just a person and you cant actually blame her for everything that went wrong in our marriage like i was her helpless thrall or somethin

JOHN: that’s not what i was saying...

ROXY: ok neither of us came here to argue about janey did we

JOHN: you’re right. let’s just not talk about her.

ROXY: yea

JOHN: anyway...

JOHN: i’ve been doing a lot of thinking about how things got to be like they are.

JOHN: i guess i’ll just come out and say it.

JOHN: i completed fucked up your entire life.

JOHN: i’m not going to pretend like there are two sides here. it’s my bad, totally.

JOHN: like, not just what happened to our marriage, though it’s also true that that’s completely my fault.

JOHN: but even before that...

JOHN: i think i fucked up on just this massive, fundamental level, and it’s what i did—

JOHN: or, well, what i didn’t do—

JOHN: that caused every stupid bullshit thing about the way this world is.

JOHN: none of this was supposed to be this way.

JOHN: honestly, it doesn’t feel right that we got married at all, does it?

JOHN: your life was heading in this whole other direction with callie, and i just...

JOHN: i dunno. i just kind of took that from you.

JOHN: i think i ended up taking a lot of decisions from a lot of people.

JOHN: everything took a backseat to what i wanted.

JOHN: whatever cosmic significance the lives here do or don’t have, all the pointless suffering i’ve created is... inhumane. and—

ROXY: oh nah ill stop u rite there my man

ROXY: im sorry john ilu but this is some hot steamin horseshit

JOHN: what?!

ROXY: its some real jerkoff emoji stuff is all im sayin!!

ROXY: you think you choice mattered so much that no one elses could measure up?

ROXY: n then what

ROXY: did u get what u wanted?

ROXY: did your life end and the points got tallied and you came out on top or like what?

ROXY: still p much seems like were movin to me

ROXY: and you sure dont seem like ur winnin so wheres all this good shit you got that you gotta go around handin out apologies for?

ROXY: also damn dude while were at it!!

ROXY: u forgot to actually say sorry in that apology!

JOHN: no, i didn’t — i just meant...

JOHN: i’m sorry for fucking up your life, or making it not—

ROXY: i like my life!!!

ROXY: i mean it aint perf and i got my share of fuckups n mistakes in there but you dont get to tell me its fucked up

ROXY: or that it isnt real or somethin

ROXY: its mine!

ROXY: i mean i felt... somethin i guess

ROXY: but its not just you

ROXY: youve never been the only player in this game u kno

ROXY: do u not remember who all was there when this all kicked off?

ROXY: me n callie wouldna told u u had a choice if it was all just some meaningless bs

ROXY: its not like i was ever some master seer of all that ever was or will be but i do know a lil bit abt what coulda gone down if things were different

ROXY: and u know what

ROXY: i like the way things turned out just fuckin fine

ROXY: so maybe u could stop wastin precious eternity thinkin ur so special that its ur fault everyones not perfectly happy

JOHN: i just kept wanting to find ways to make everything make sense, you know?

JOHN: but maybe it just fucking doesn’t.

ROXY: i know we became grownups in a world built specifically n cosmically for us

ROXY: so i get wanting to find a pattern in everything

ROXY: but not everything has 2 b that deep

ROXY: n when u think abt it

ROXY: lookin at it that way, like evrythin has to be this elaborately purposeful heroic design to be worthwhile

ROXY: is actually p shallow

JOHN: oh.

JOHN: yeah, i guess.

JOHN: i’m sorry. it’s just so hard to not feel like a total asshole.

JOHN: maybe i’m not some grand vizier of destroying time and space or whatever.

JOHN: but we KNOW that there’s a canon timeline out there.

JOHN: and it seems really obvious to me that we aren’t in it anymore.

ROXY: so what

JOHN: “so what”???

ROXY: yea

ROXY: so what

ROXY: tf do i care that theres some other reality out there some1 arbitrarily decided was the “real” one

ROXY: whats that have to do with the life i have now

ROXY: what is there actually that makes this one mean less than that one to the ppl who r actually in it

JOHN: you never feel like it would’ve been better if things had gone a different way?

JOHN: magic or no, i could have done a lot differently, for you especially.

JOHN: stuck around, or... fuck.

JOHN: stayed out of your way to begin with.

JOHN: let you and callie do your thing, or do whatever it was you seemed to be headed off to do.

JOHN: i just didn’t expect it to be me, after...

ROXY: nah dont say that

ROXY: i mean i accept ur apology this time but

ROXY: theres obvs all kinds of ways shit coulda gone

ROXY: and tbh back then

ROXY: with her...

ROXY: mostly i think i just wanted to do stuff right

ROXY: not that i knew wtf that even meant lmao

ROXY: which was prob the problem lmao lmao lmao

ROXY: just like

ROXY: we had this big fresh as hell start at bein people!

ROXY: i had all these conflictin thoughts abt how to be me in the first place

ROXY: like what it meant to date a beautiful skull alien

ROXY: sexualitywise and genderwise and person in generalwise

ROXY: for a while there i didnt know if i wanted ppl to think of me as a woman at all

JOHN: ah, i didn’t know.

JOHN: well, i guess maybe i wondered?

JOHN: but the way young idiot me would have wondered, so not that deeply.

JOHN: and it seemed like you’d forgotten all about it when we got together.

ROXY: i hadnt forgotten about it

JOHN: do you want to talk about it...?

ROXY: i coulda told you then but i kinda felt embarrassed abt flip floppin with my identity i think

ROXY: mean it isnt like i grew up with big airquotes society tellin me what was right n wrong like u did

ROXY: so it wasnt any kind of shamefest

ROXY: just a lot of abstract hypotheticals wed only just started talking about and never got very far into

ROXY: just idk i thought i might do things one way but then i stopped hangin out with callie as much

ROXY: its not like i stopped thinkin abt it

ROXY: or her

ROXY: but it never rly came up with anyone else and i didnt rly feel like i could talk abt it with you so i never brought it up again

JOHN: i’m really sorry you felt that way, roxy.

ROXY: its ok its not ur fault

JOHN: but you don’t regret it?

JOHN: not going for that stuff, and instead just... marrying me?

JOHN: i’m not asking so you can absolve me, i’m just impressed.

JOHN: how do you not second guess every choice you make?

ROXY: i havent stuck my head in the timeline vortex like u have so i dunno what its like to see other options

ROXY: i just do things the best way i think to do em and then shrug n hope it works out?

ROXY: i dont think i can regret anything

ROXY: theres not only one right way to be me imo

ROXY: i like the me i am

ROXY: its not like i went n decided “actually hell ya love to be a woman n do all the shit on the woman checklist”

ROXY: i get that thats prob what it looks like outside of my own self but i dont care abt that

ROXY: sorry lol im not good at this whole explainin what transpires in my brain thing

ROXY: idk this life ive been livin gave me harry anderson

ROXY: that kinda outweighs anything else just for me personally

ROXY: n its not like i ever totally quit thinkin abt that gender stuff

ROXY: i just found a different way to work it out than maybe i was originally gonna

ROXY: i...

ROXY: but lmao john were just adults

ROXY: were not dead!

ROXY: idk i mean were only what... barely middle aged in regular human years?

ROXY: we got all kinds of hypothetical but still prolly finite eternity to work our shit out

ROXY: who tf knows

ROXY: its not like you figure out who you are when youre 23 and then the rest of ur whole life is just sittin back watchin ur shit fall apart or not

ROXY: i mean maybe thats been it for u so far

JOHN: haha. ouch.

ROXY: i just dont think im anywhere near done buildin those roxy self actualization train stops

ROXY: who the fuck can say how many more i got lined up

ROXY: same goes for u

ROXY: if youre willing to look at this life as more than a cosmically pointless dead end failure that is

JOHN: i guess...

JOHN: there’s literally nothing to do but keep moving forward.

JOHN: i may as well not be a big fucking downer about it if i don’t have to be.

ROXY: thats the spirit

ROXY: weve got a million billion lifetimes ahead of us john

ROXY: u dont even KNOW all the ways u got left to fuck up in!!

ROXY: hows that for some inspiration??!

JOHN: it’s...

JOHN: it’s pretty fucking inspirational, roxy.

JOHN: thank you for trusting me with this personal stuff.

JOHN: i know partly you were telling me all that to kick my sadsack ass, but i know you don’t talk about this kind of thing every day.

ROXY: to be real i hadnt even let myself think abt it every day

ROXY: so thanks for lettin me ramble at u out loud instead of just almost thinkin abt it once every few years

JOHN: i guess sometimes it takes hearing the same shit over and over until it sticks.

JOHN: that’s mostly an own on myself by the way.

ROXY: lmao were just rippin off those bandaids left n right over here

ROXY: a coupla professional issue discussers

JOHN: yeah, i’m frankly baffled by how fucking good we are at this?

JOHN: where was this when we sucked so hard at being married?

ROXY: buried under a shocking number of issues is my guess

JOHN: well, it’s nice to throw a few off, for once.

ROXY: feel free to communicate with me instead of spendin the next 300 years in a silent prison of your own making if u so desire

JOHN: hey harry anderson.

JOHN: it’s really, really good to see you.

JOHN: do you wanna go for a drive?

HARRY ANDERSON: yeah, dad.

HARRY ANDERSON: that could be cool.

#homestuck #homestuck epilogues #roxy lalonde #john egbert #harry anderson egbert #candy epilogue #page 38

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rose-remnants · 1 year

Text

Oh, the magic.

The month of May was incredible & June is going to be even better.

I literally cannot even explain all the incredible shifting I'm experiencing. It is beyond words. But I just had the most magical moment that brought me to tears.

I was sitting in the river doing the 9 breath technique. I started off laying down for the first set, then sat up. Second round, was thinking the affirmations 'I am pregnant with all the possibilities of my most beautiful reality. Every day in every way I'm getting better & better'. AND A MAMA DEER WITH A FAWN JUST WALKED DOWN FROM THE HILLSIDE & UP TO THE EDGE OF THE RIVER!?!! Looking at me. Like the beaver! I was in awe.

This is the second time recently I've seen two deer together (third time seeing deer total, after telling Dears that I literally never see deer in our yard lol). I had noticed the tracks down here the other day & found that very interesting. I followed them a ways & thought about how I never see deer tracks down here. (Oh, I also almost forgot. The whole reason I went down there was to meditate/breathe because I found a sticker that said "breathe" but it was messed up & my breathing has been bleh because of being sick haha so I thought well ok I haven't done the breathing exercises in a while, why not.. )

So. I watched them & pondered on why they came forth. I felt such a gentle, lovely energy. & it felt like such a gift. I thanked my guides & spoke my feelings aloud & cried tears of joy & gratitude. In that moment I was just so overcome by the realization that I almost didn't make it through the last few years, I really believed nothing would be good again & that life had lost its magic & that I was completely lost. But here it is. Here I am.

And then I thought of Artemis, & suddenly felt such a strong energy/presence come in from the left. So tingly & buzzy, warm & gentle yet wise & fierce, cutting when necessary. Could almost see her. Feel her smiling & strong. I feel blessed. Like her energy merged with mine. I feel like she's still with me, & as I was thinking that I felt the tingles & smile energy again.

I asked what offerings she likes.

Sunflowers. Coffee. Tea. Focus. Discipline. Writing. Crystal grid? Sing. Gentleness, but strength. Tending to animals.

Dragonfly just landed on the left side of my head.

When I was leaving the bank, saw a large spider missing legs! 2 on one side, 3 on other.

I was also thinking, hey isn't Artemis associated with Sagittarius (full moon in Sag tomorrowwww. At the very least, they both have arrows. Oh. You know who else has arrows :| surely not) so I did a quick search.

lolwhat. This (part) hound dog thinks she's mine. Always following me around, trying to protect me, laying as close to me as she can.

I didn't want a dog. I didn't want a cat. And I didn't want butterflies.

And yet...

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st0ryf1lms · 2 years

Text

dancing with our hands tied ➳ stephen strange

pairing: stephen strange x reader

word count: 1.9k

genre/warnings: NO SPOILERS FOR DSMOM IN THIS FIC, 50% angst, 50% fluff but its happy ending, just one 'asshole' there & no more, toxic family & friends, stephen & reader have an age gap maybe 5-10 yrs at best, typical stephen being an ass HAHAHSHS, stephen might be a little ooc

synopsis: after receiving too many comments about you & stephen's relationship, you just had enough of it and burst.

a/n: the synopsis doesn’t really do the fic justice im just really bad at making synopses im so sorry 😭 but anyway, this is my first mcu fic in this blog yay! i’ve been thinking abt it for a long time now & i finally did it! i hope yall enjoy it as much as i super LOOOOOVED writing it hehe ok i’ll stop now happy reading!!

edit: this is now cross-posted on ao3!

"Y/N, c'mon, he's older than you. You can do better than this."

"Oh, come on, Strange. Really? A kid? She's young, she's still got a lot to see in the world. You could do better."

"You can do better."

You tossed and turned in your bed, trying your very best to drift off to a peaceful slumber without any interruption. You took in a deep breath and let out a big sigh before pushing yourself up to sit up on your bed. Apparently, the words of your family members and their friends had gotten their way to you and you asked for a break with your lover. You felt guilty, of course, who would want to push the love of their life away for a bunch of gossip and hearsay?

Last week, you came to your annual family reunion held at your grandparents' house. You went without Stephen because he didn't want to intrude into your family's traditions. The moment you arrived, you were bombarded with so many questions not even a celebrity surrounded by paparazzi could handle. They took the opportunity of your boyfriend's absence to ask you all about him. Questions that included "Y/N, honey, I don't like that boy", "are you really sure about him?", "is there no way we could change your mind? There are other men out there, my dear", and the one that struck you deep like a knife — "Y/N, sweetie, you could do better than him."

Stephen had been receiving a lot of those comments as well. He recently attended the wedding of Dr. Christine Palmer, who felt ecstatic for the sorcerer because he finally found the happiness he deserved. He can't say the same about the other doctors, though. Every time they approached him, they would ask him — "why her?", "Stephen, she's so young for you", "she could leave you for a younger man for all we know", and that one six-word sentence, "you could do better than her."

Stephen went back to the Sanctum, exhausted and drained, not wanting any more contact with the world outside. You, unsurprisingly, decided to go and stay at the Sanctum as well — wanting to see your lover's face for comfort. He'd always invite you to move in with him for easier access to him but you'd always reply, "c'mon, Stephen, where's the fun of getting married when I've already moved in with you while we're still dating?"

"Honey, I'm home!" You called out to Stephen which erupted a chuckle from the said man. "You always love to do that, don't you?" He made his way to you, arms partially spreading out which you took as an invitation to jump into. "That bad, huh?" He asked, burying his head and hands on your hair. "Oh, God, you wouldn't even wanna know." You groaned. "But, how about you? How was Christine's wedding? You gave her my greetings, didn't you?" You asked continuously. Stephen gave you a small smile in which a sigh followed. "It was okay. Just exhausting. You know, pictures and stuff." He said, shoulders slightly drooping.

"Oh, yes, I forgot. I was dating the most famous sorcerer in the world." You mockingly rolled your eyes with a chuckle. "Haha, funny. C'mon, honey, let's get you to bed." He retorted back before dragging you into his bedroom.

The next week after the wedding and the reunion turned out to be the best and worst week of your almost two-year long relationship. You had decided to stay the week at the Sanctum, mainly because 'you just wanted to' although your boyfriend didn't buy it, he still believed you. What he didn't know was you wanted to stay because your family's words was already getting to you. Multiple messages from your aunts contained them getting you multiple blind dates with other men even if you said you didn't want to, they still tried in case you'd ever change your mind.

You wanted to prove to yourself that this was just one of the few challenges you and Stephen would face. You wanted to prove to yourself that your love for him was stronger in spite of your deep fears that the world would divide you. Every morning, you'd make breakfast — even cook lunch and dinner enough for the both of you and Wong. Every night, you'd have deep late night talks about the most random things — turning the bedroom into a sacred oasis for the both of you. So, yes, you were a mess.

You were able to keep that mess at bay until that fateful Friday evening.

"Auntie, please stop. Please! I don't want any of them. I am more than satisfied with Stephen, I don't need anyone else." Stephen heard you arguing with your aunt on the phone in the kitchen above his office upstairs. He went down to see you and immediately rushed down to your side when he saw you sobbing on the floor with your head buried in your arms and knees.

"Honey, you okay?" He asked gently. "No." You replied, voice muffled. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asked again, more carefully than the last one. You finally lifted your head up, revealing your puffy red eyes and tear-streaked face. You let out a shaky sigh, before speaking. "It's just that, my aunt has been forcing me to go on these blind dates with men my age, thinking that you're not good enough for me." You said with a whimper in your tone.

"Well, what did you say?" He asked. "I told her, no. I don't need those. But she kept on insisting and, I don't know, I just burst out, I guess." You cried out. "Oh, I see. Do you need time off then?" Stephen asked out of the blue. Your eyes widened in disbelief and horror, still not processing completely what he said. "W-what? Stephen, what are you saying?" You asked him tearfully. "Y/N, I think you need some time to think about it. Now, I'm giving you the time you need." He said it like it was nothing. Now, the tears had started rolling down again.

"Stephen Strange, how dare you?! I fought for you, now this is the treatment I get?!" You stood up and so did he, shouting at him at the incredulity of the man that stood before you. "Y/N, I'm just saying that maybe you need to think about what your aunt said." He attempted to clarify himself but it was to no good. You had been looking at him a look of hurt and terror in your face, unable to comprehend the words that had just come out of his mouth.

"God, you're such an asshole, Strange! If you want that, then so be it!" He flinched at the use of his last name, you never called him that. You stormed out of the Sanctum and went back to your apartment.

Which is where you are now. At 3AM on a Sunday, facing your phone at the nightstand — wishing it would light up with a text from your lover. Thinking it would be useless to wait for a man with a pride higher than the Burj Khalifa to show up, you faced the other side — hoping to at least get a reasonable amount of sleep.

Just as you were finally about to get a blink of sleep, the doorbell to your apartment unit rang. Muttering a string of curses to the person who rang your doorbell at the wee hours of the night, you got up from your bed and walked over to the buzzer.

"Who is this?" You asked groggily. "Y/N, it's me. Could you buzz me in, please?" A voice you knew all too well replied from the other side. That same baritone voice you grew to love so much that also turned into one that you so deeply despised. Upon hearing his voice, it seemed like all forms of sleepiness was knocked out of your body. You took a deep sigh and closed your eyes, thinking you were dreaming and this would all go away if you opened them again.

"Y/N, are you there?" The voice spoke up again, startling you, causing you to open your eyes and groan loudly because it, in fact, wasn't a dream. "Stephen, what are you doing here? I thought you said you wanted to give me time." You said exasperatedly, just wanting to go back to the comfort of your bed. "Y/N, please, just give me 5 minutes of your time. After that, I'll be gone." Stephen begged one more time and even through the speaker, you could see the look of desperation on his face. Feeling pity for the man on your porch, you decide to buzz him in and sat down on the sofa of your apartment's living room — waiting for the sorcerer to knock on your door.

Not long after, you heard a knock on your door just as you expected. What you didn't expect though, is to see him appear ragged, eyes surrounded by dark circles most likely due to lack of sleep, and even puffy red eyes. His look is almost identical to yours, only difference is you looking more haggard than he is. You stepped aside, signaling him to head inside your apartment. He sat down on your sofa as you shut the door behind you.

"Want anything? Coffee, tea, perhaps maybe beer?" You asked your guest. "No need, Y/N. I'll be gone after a while anyway." He, to your surprise, politely dismissed your offer. "Alright. What's your business here, Stephen?" You asked him straight to the point, sitting across him in one of your beanbags.

"Okay. Firstly, I want to apologize." He started off, pausing for a while to let you speak if you ever have anything to say but is met with your unwavering gaze and crossed arms to your chest. "Y/N, I am so, so, so sorry to have said those things to you. I know it's a very asshole thing for me to say, especially right after you risked your relationship with your relative just for me. I really am truly sorry." He continued.

"Believe it or not, I've been experiencing the same, too. At Christine's wedding, the other doctors there were also telling me to find someone my age and that you were too young for me. It definitely took a toll on me and I took it out on you which was wrong and I shouldn't have done so. This past week without you has been the absolute hell and I know now that you're worth more than what others think and I've lost you to those. So, I understand if you choose not to accept this apology. I'll just be on my way." He finished off, standing up and preparing to leave.

"Stephen, wait." You spoke, stopping him on his tracks. "I'm sorry, too. I should've been there with you and we should've faced this together as one and not divided. This isn't a 'you' nor a 'me' problem, but an 'us' problem. We should've dealt with it that way. So, yes, I accept your apology and I hope that you accept mine, too." You said, standing up to face your lover by the door.

You made your way to him, cupping his face in your hands and pressed your forehead to his before whispering a small "I'm sorry, love." He gave you a small kiss on the lips as he said, "It's alright, honey. I forgive you. Let's go home, yeah?"

He pulled you out of your apartment, holding each others' hands with smiles plastered on your faces.

#dr strange #doctor strange #doctor stephen strange #stephen strange #dr strange x reader #stephen strange x reader #dr strange imagine #stephen strange imagine #dr strange angst #stephen strange angst #dr strange fluff #stephen strange fluff

1K notes · View notes

labomi · 4 years

Text

selfish | one (18+)

Summary: You're a former coworker of Kento Nanami back when he was just an office worker. You accidentally run into him at a bakery many years later which gives you a second chance at getting to know the man who had always caught your eye.

Pairing: Kento Nanami x f!Reader

Words: 11.1k+

Warnings: Explicit sexual content, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, oral sex, creampie, explicit language, attempted sexual assault, kidnapping, canon-typical violence, alcohol

Note: Read on ao3 here! I’ve been on tumblr on and off for about 10 years at this point (yikes), but I recently decided to start a new one as sort of a writing blog with a lot of anime gif reblogging on the side as well haha. Kind of nervous to post my first fic on tumblr for some reason, so I hope you enjoy! Thank you for reading!

Index: [Part One] [Part Two]

“Nanami? Kento Nanami? Is that you?”

You couldn’t believe your eyes. It had been years! Was that really him?

---

The night you accidentally ran into Kento Nanami started off like any other night in your life. After an exhausting day of work, you decided to treat yourself to some sweets at a nearby bakery. The small chime on the door signaled your entrance with the lone employee warmly greeting you.

“Welcome!”

There was only one other customer in the small shop. A tall man stood at the cash register.

Hmm.

There was something strangely familiar about the man’s demeanor. Curious, you drifted over to the display case next to the register to try and sneak a peek at his face. While admiring the delicious-looking pastries on the counter, you listened in on the conversation between him and the cashier.

“That will be 2000 yen,” the lady said.

“I’ll pay with card.”

You stiffened slightly, eyes widening in surprise.

That voice!

You recognized that voice!

The man shifted his face towards you as he reached to grab his wallet from his pocket. You were finally able to get a glimpse of his face.

You gasped.

“It is you!” you exclaimed in surprise. “Nanami!”

He looked as prim and proper as ever. The man still wore a suit and tie with his hair neatly parted. The only major difference in his appearance was the sunglasses that now completely shielded his eyes.

“It’s good to see you again! How have you been?” you asked eagerly.

Nanami looked at you silently, trying to recall where he had seen your familiar face before.

Then he remembered.

A flood of memories from a different life overcame him. The man hesitantly said your name, like he couldn’t quite believe your unexpected appearance before him. You nodded enthusiastically while he absentmindedly handed his credit card to the cashier.

“Oh wow,” you breathed, feeling a little giddy. “I haven’t seen you since you quit all those years ago. What are you doing now?”

Nanami seemed to pause for a second, adjusting his sunglasses. “I work at a school.”

“Oh! As a teacher?”

“No, just as staff.”

“That sounds nice. What school?”

“It’s a private religious school in the mountains. It’s not particularly well-known,” the man replied vaguely.

“Oh, I see.”

A loud beep of a cell phone interrupted the conversation. Nanami reached into his other pocket and took out his phone. He frowned, looking at the device. “I apologize, but I have to go immediately.”

“Oh, uh, ok,” you said, feeling slightly disappointed. You barely had any time to catch up with your former coworker. Nanami grabbed the bag from the counter and swiftly exited the store. You watched him walk away with a sigh. What were the chances that you would bump into him again? You pouted, upset that the circumstances hadn’t exactly worked out in your favor.

“Oh no!” the cashier suddenly cried out. “He forgot his card!” She pointed at the blue credit card on the counter.

“Lemme see if I can catch him!” you responded, already running out of the bakery. You pushed open the door and ran in the direction you saw the man leave. “Nanami!” you shouted. Other pedestrians looked at you curiously, but you couldn’t see the tall man anywhere. You walked around a bit further out, continuing to call his name but to no avail. Sighing, you headed back to the bakery.

“No luck,” you said to the cashier. “He’s gone already. I have no idea how he disappeared so quickly.” Crossing your arms against your chest, you looked at the forgotten card in frustration. “What should we do now?” If only you had his number!

“I guess I can keep it here in case he comes back,” the lady reasoned.

Hmm.

An idea popped in your head.

A selfish one.

“Wait! How about I take it and return it to him?” you asked. Then you realized that your request might come off as suspicious. “We used to work together, I promise I’m not trying to steal it or anything.”

The cashier smiled at you softly. “I trust you. You come in here quite a lot and that man did say your name, so I know you’re not lying.”

You sighed in relief.

Thank goodness.

After buying some pastries for yourself, you walked out of the bakery holding Nanami’s credit card in your hand. You carefully stored it in your bag before beginning the walk back to your apartment.

A private religious school in the mountains, huh?

It shouldn’t be too hard to find.

---

You groaned, fighting the urge to pull your hair in frustration.

How hard was it to find this damn school?!

You were sitting at your desk in the dark. The only light in the bedroom came from your laptop screen which was full of search engine results for “tokyo private religious school”. You were on page 15. Not a promising sign.

Recalling your conversation with Nanami, you remembered the man said he worked at a religious school in the mountains. However, none of the private schools you had found so far were located in the mountains. You frowned. Had Nanami been lying?

You shook your head to yourself.

No.

He’s not the type to lie. He did say it wasn’t well-known.

You scrolled further down and clicked on the next page. Quickly skimming the results, you finally found something that caught your eye.

Tokyo Metropolitan Curse Technical College.

Huh. What a strange name for a school.

You clicked on the link. It brought you to a strange forum that looked somewhat sketchy and unreliable, but someone had at least posted an address for the school. You grabbed your phone and immediately plugged the address into the map app.

You punched the air in triumph.

“Yes!” The dot was located in the mountains by some Tokyo suburbs.

This has to be the place!

Luckily, tomorrow was Friday which meant you had no classes, and you weren’t scheduled for a shift at work. You were free to find the school and return the card to Nanami in person.

“Ok!” you said to yourself, rubbing your hands together. “Now to find out how to get there.”

---

You looked at the dot of your current location on your phone and then back at the vast empty woods in front of you.

This can’t be it!

You groaned out loud in frustration, stamping your feet in a little tantrum.

Why is it still so hard to find this damn school?!

Looking at your phone again, you double-checked the map to see that you were in fact at the exact location of the address you inputted, but nothing was here. It was just trees!

You sighed in disappointment but refused to give up right away. Maybe your phone’s GPS was off because you were so high up in the mountains and the signal was bad. You decided to follow the road that led up the mountain with the hope that you might accidentally stumble across the school. If there was a road, it had to lead somewhere! But strangely enough, you hadn’t seen any cars, buildings, or pedestrians since entering the area.

After walking around for almost an hour, you decided to take a break. Sitting in the shade of some trees by the side of the road, you took your water bottle out of your bag for a quick sip. You admired the beautiful, quiet scenery in front of you.

Maybe this was a bad idea.

You were currently lost in the mountains of Tokyo looking for a school you weren’t quite sure actually existed. And it was all because you were selfish and wanted to see Nanami again. Your old coworker.

You hadn’t been particularly close to him at work, though he didn’t seem overly friendly with anyone in the office. Nanami was the stoic and serious type. He didn’t talk much with the team, but you could tell he worked hard. He was always one of the last people to leave the office for the night, if he did leave. On many occasions, you found him dozing at his desk in the morning when you arrived early to work before everyone else with the sneaking suspicion that he had spent the entire night in the office.

Unlike most of the other employees and especially your boss, Nanami seemed to still care about the clients instead of just the company’s profits, judging from the small snippets of conversations you overheard from him. You had always wanted to get to know him better, but he didn’t particularly have an approachable demeanor. At the time, you were just a young, newly graduated woman who was afraid of everything and everyone. So you often just kept to yourself.

You sighed, looking down at the ground. Taking Nanami’s credit card hostage was a pathetic way of trying to rekindle a relationship that never existed in the first place. You made up your mind. It was time to head back home and drop off the card at the bakery so he could pick it up himself. Today’s excursion was just a giant waste of time much to your disappointment.

“Excuse me, miss. What are you doing here?”

“Huh?” A man was hovering over you. You swore he hadn’t been there a second ago.

You screamed. “P-please don’t hurt me!” You put your arms out in front of you, shielding yourself from any potential harm. “I don’t have much money, but you can have it all!”

The man burst out laughing. You slowly lowered your arms, hoping that his laughter meant he wasn’t going to attack you.

“I’m not going to hurt you, and I especially don’t want your money.”

You let out a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness.” No longer afraid, you took a closer look at the stranger. He was tall. Very tall. Wearing a black outfit and a matching blindfold that spiked up his white hair.

What a strange appearance.

“Well, I won’t hurt you as long as you tell me what you’re doing here.” You gulped, hearing the silent threat in his words.

“Umm, umm, well, you see I-I got a bit lost and w-was just taking a rest,” you stuttered nervously, fiddling with your hands. “I heard there’s a private school around here and I’m trying to find it, because I know someone who works there. His name is Kento Nanami and we used to work together many many years ago and I just happened to run into him last night at a bakery but he left his credit card there and I wanted to give it back to him in person, so I thought it was a good idea to deliver it at his workplace but this school is so hard to find I have no idea where I’m going and-and I think I’m just going to leave now actually.” You realized you were rambling, so you forcibly shut your mouth to stop yourself from looking like a complete fool in front of the stranger.

The man hummed in thought for several seconds before suddenly grinning and chuckling to himself. His demeanor no longer felt threatening.

“Kento Nanami, huh,” the man said, still smiling happily.

“Oh, you know him?” You perked up, suddenly hopeful.

Maybe they work together!

“Leave it to me!” the stranger cheered, giving you a thumbs up. “I’ll escort you to the school and make sure you hand-deliver that credit card to Nanami!”

You felt relieved, tears almost prickling your eyes. “Oh thank you so much!”

---

“Satoru.”

“Mm.”

“Can’t you tell there’s a human who has been wandering near the barrier for quite a while now? It looks like they’re trying to find a way in,” Yaga commented.

“Well, they can’t. Isn’t that the whole point of the barrier?”

“I know that!” the principal grunted angrily. “But since you’re just lounging here around doing nothing, go check it out.”

“Fine.” Gojo got off the couch and headed outside, wondering how a human accidentally wandered this close to the school so far up the mountains.

---

It only took several minutes before you and the strange man found a path leading to the school. You blinked in surprise. You felt like you had walked by this part of the road earlier but had seen nothing.

Walking alongside the man quietly, you suddenly realized you had completely forgotten your manners. Quickly bowing to your escort, you introduced yourself and thanked him for taking the time to safely bring you to the school.

“It’s no problem. Any friend of Nanami is a friend of mine. Oh, and I’m Satoru Gojo by the way. I’m the first-year teacher here.”

He was a teacher? This man wearing a blindfold in broad daylight? You swallowed nervously. You wondered what kind of school Nanami was working for exactly.

Once you finally reached the main school grounds, all of your reservations immediately melted away. “Wow!” you breathed. The campus was absolutely gorgeous with beautiful statues, shrines, and gates. You couldn’t help but stop and admire your surroundings. “This school is beautiful.”

Gojo brought you to the teacher’s lounge and gestured for you to sit down. “So, tell me again how you know our dear Nanami?”

---

Nanami had just finished a mission when his phone chimed, signaling a text. He finished wiping his blade clean before grabbing the device. The message was from Gojo.

Gojo: Come back to Jujutsu Tech. Your girlfriend is here ;)

The sorcerer stared at the message.

Nanami: I have no idea what you mean.

Gojo: ( ˘ ³˘)♥

He angrily shoved his phone back in his pocket and walked over to the car where Ijichi was waiting. He entered the back seat before closing the door behind him. “Hurry up. I need to find a certain white-haired idiot and destroy him.”

---

Nanami was walking towards the teacher’s lounge when he heard your bright laughter. He froze for a couple of seconds.

What were you doing here?

He picked up the pace, quickly entering the lounge to see you giggling on the couch next to Gojo. For some reason, it bothered him to see how close the idiot was to you and how happy you looked in his presence.

“Nanami! You’re here!” Gojo exclaimed, immediately noticing the other sorcerer’s presence.

You turned your head quickly towards the doorway with a bright grin. “Oh, Nanami! Hi again!”

Nanami observed the scene, trying to figure out what was going on, but he was drawing a blank.

First of all, you weren’t a sorcerer. How did you enter the school grounds?

Second, did you know Gojo? The two of you seemed quite friendly on the couch together.

Third, was Gojo implying that you were his girlfriend? That was absolutely ridiculous.

“What are you doing here?” Nanami asked you cautiously, adjusting his sunglasses.

“Oh!” You dug around in your bag, pulling out your wallet. You removed a blue credit card. “You left this behind at the bakery yesterday. I tried to chase after you, but you disappeared so quickly. I had the day off today, so I thought I would try to find your workplace and give your card back to you.” You got off the couch, approaching Nanami and handing him the card.

Nanami took the card from you before placing it back in his own wallet. “You didn’t have to do this. How did you even find your way here?”

“I found her wandering nearby!” Gojo jumped in, grinning at the other sorcerer. “Imagine my surprise when she said the two of you used to work together back when you were just a salaryman. I just had to invite her back here. You never mentioned you used to work with such a lovely lady.”

You visibly blushed at Gojo’s words which just bothered Nanami even more. “Thank you for returning my card, but I think it’s about time y—”

“Nanami. Nanami. Namami,” Gojo said in a singsong voice. “You’re all work and no fun. It’s been years since the two of you have seen each other, and you’re already trying to get rid of her? Don’t you want to catch up a little bit?”

You played with your hair, a little nervous. “I mean if you’re busy Nanami, I can go. But I was hoping we could talk a little bit.” You looked up at him with bright eyes. “I want to hear how you’ve been doing.”

Nanami took one look at your hopeful face and immediately gave in. “Alright.” He gestured for you to sit back down as he walked over to one of the armchairs. The sorcerer pretended like he didn’t see your little jump of excitement as you hurried back to the couch with Gojo.

Once the three of you were all seated comfortably, you brought up what you had been previously discussing with Gojo. “I didn’t know you’re teaching at the same high school you went to as a student. That’s pretty cool!”

“He was one of the few students who graduated and decided to leave the community,” Gojo pointed out. “Most of us stay here and continue working for the school.” Nanami subtly glared at the white-haired sorcerer, wondering how much he had told you about the jujutsu world.

“Why did you decide to come back then?” you asked curiously.

“I changed my mind,” Nanami simply stated. “I realized I would find my career slightly more rewarding if I worked for the school than that company.”

You nodded in agreement. “That makes sense. I’m glad we eventually both left that job.” You slightly grimaced, just thinking about your past. It didn’t go unnoticed by Nanami.

“When did you leave?” he asked.

You hummed, recalling the past. “It was probably a couple of months after you left. I, uh, messed up something really badly and I got fired.”

Nanami raised his eyebrows in surprise. You didn’t seem like the type to make big mistakes. He remembered you as quite the careful and diligent worker. He narrowed his eyes slightly, wondering if you were being deceitful.

“It’s ok though,” you continued. “I worked a couple of odd jobs afterward to keep up with the bills until I decided I wanted to become a nurse! So I’m actually back in school now and working part-time to help pay tuition.”

“A nurse, huh,” Gojo remarked. “What a noble career choice.”

“Ahh, I wouldn’t say I’m noble or anything. I just think I would find my life more fulfilling if I was actively helping people,” you explained. “Probably similar to how you felt when you switched careers, Nanami.”

He nodded at your words.

uThe three of you chatted amicably the rest of the day. Gojo and you mostly carried the conversation, but Nanami would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy listening to your voice. After he ran into you at the bakery last night, he couldn’t stop thinking about you. It was the first time he was confronted with his old life after deciding to become a sorcerer again. Part of Nanami wanted to never look back on that phase of his life again, but perhaps it wasn’t all bad. Sure, he hadn't particularly liked anyone from that office, but he didn’t mind you. You had always been quiet, polite, and hardworking.

Nanami still remembered his last day at the office. You had organized a surprise farewell party just for him with a cake, balloons, and everything. After everyone had their fill of free food and left the conference room, you had shyly wished him luck in the future and said you would miss seeing him in the office. All those memories came rushing back after encountering you in that bakery.

The sun started to set when you finally noticed the time.

“Ah! I should probably go,” you announced, checking your phone. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to overstay my welcome.”

“No, no,” Gojo assured. “You are very much welcome here. Like I said earlier, any friend of Nanami is a friend of mine and all my friends are welcome here!”

“How do you plan on getting home?” Nanami asked, mildly concerned.

“Don’t worry!” Gojo said. “I got it handled. Ijichi will drive her back.”

“Huh? No, it’s fine,” you tried to argue. “I can get back by myself. It’s not a problem.”

“What kind of gentlemen would we be if we didn’t ensure you got home safely? Ijichi is our finest chauffeur,” the blindfolded man insisted. “He will take care of you.”

You looked at Nanami who simply nodded at you, encouraging you to accept Gojo’s offer. Sighing, you crossed your arms over your chest with a pout. “Alright. Thank you.”

The two men waved goodbye as you left in Ijichi’s car to head back home.

“Was it really wise to have her on the school grounds?” Nanami asked.

Gojo hummed. “It’s fine.”

“No, it’s not. Normal humans aren’t allowed here for a reason.”

The blindfolded sorcerer didn’t reply. Instead, he took out his phone and started tapping on the screen. Nanami’s phone chimed. It was a text from Gojo. Opening it, he saw it was a string of numbers.

A phone number.

“You should call her sometime,” Gojo said. “She likes you.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yes, I do. What kind of woman travels to the mountains on her day off to try and find a publically non-existent school to return a credit card to someone she doesn’t like?”

Nanami remained silent.

“Just because we’re adults and jujutsu sorcerers doesn’t mean we aren’t allowed to have some normal fun. It’s alright to be selfish every once in a while.”

How badly Nanami wanted to believe Gojo’s words.

---

You heard the door open and close.

“Hello! How many I help y—Gojo?”

You blinked in surprise, not expecting to see the teacher at your workplace. While taking classes to become a nurse, you worked part-time at a small boba tea shop. You had just finished serving the flurry of college students who needed a midday pick-me-up when Gojo appeared. Several of the seated patrons whispered and pointed at him, wondering why he was wearing a blindfold and how he could see.

“Thought I would drop by and say hi,” he said with an easy grin.

You returned his smile. “Is Nanami with you too?” you asked, trying to sound casual.

“No, not today, unfortunately,” he replied. You tried to ignore the flash of disappointment you felt. “I’ll bring him next time.”

You perked up at Gojo’s promise, nodding eagerly. “Sounds good. So, would you like something to drink?”

The man ordered a large brown sugar milk tea with extra sugar. You looked at him, mildly concerned. “You sure you want 120% sugar? It’s pretty sweet to begin with. Trust me.”

Gojo nodded. “Yup!”

“Alright,” you said with a shrug. You did try to warn him.

You finished preparing Gojo’s drink and handed it to him along with a straw.

“Hey, do you mind if I borrow your phone for a second?” the teacher asked.

“Oh, sure,” you said, grabbing your phone from your back pocket.

Gojo took the device and opened the camera app. “Smile!” That was the only warning you got. He had taken a selfie of the two of you together. You weren’t even smiling in the photo, completely caught off guard. But Gojo was at least prepared, grinning happily and showing off his milk tea in one hand. You watched as the man repeatedly tapped on your phone screen.

“What are you doing?” you asked hesitantly.

“Here!” Gojo handed the phone back to you. Looking at the screen, you saw that he had sent the selfie of the two of you to a random number with a text that said “Having fun without you!”

“Um. Who did you send this to Gojo?”

“Nanami, of course!”

“Oh,” you said quietly, feeling butterflies in your stomach.

Nanami’s number!

You finally had it!

Gojo chuckled to himself as he saw the way your eyes lit up.

“Oh, by the way,” you said, looking up from the phone. “It’s my birthday next weekend. I’m going out with a couple of friends on Saturday at 8pm at the bar around the corner, and I was wondering if you and Nanami would like to join? You should bring Ijichi too and anyone else from the school! Only if you want though. It’s ok if you don’t want to come or you’re worried about being awkward with my other friends even though they’re super cool and encouraged me to invite you guys and I promise I won’t be upset if you can’t make it because this is kind of last minute and I—”

“Sounds great!” Gojo interrupted your rambling. “I’ll be sure to pass along the information. We'll be there.”

“Really?” You grinned at the teacher. “Awesome! I guess I’ll see you then!”

Gojo waved at you goodbye as you tried to compose yourself before the next wave of customers arrived.

---

“Ahh!! You guys actually came!” you squealed as a group of individuals approached your table in the bar. You stumbled out of the large booth where your other friends were seated, already several shots in for the night. You clumsily hugged Gojo without thinking. Releasing him, you took in his new appearance.

“You look so different!” you commented. “But not in a bad way!” The man had traded in his signature blindfold for a pair of sunglasses that still hid his eye. His hair was lying down flat instead of its usual spiked-up look.

Behind Gojo, you saw Ijichi with a woman you didn’t recognize.

“That’s Shoko Ieiri,” Gojo said, following your gaze. “She’s the doctor at our school.”

You happily greeted both of them, thanking them for coming.

And finally, you saw the person you were looking forward to seeing the most. Nanami looked good as always. He was dressed a little more casually for the night without his signature jacket, tie, and sunglasses. Instead, he wore a crisp, blue button-up shirt with the top few buttons undone. You tried not to stare too much at his revealed skin.

As you approached Nanami, you reached out to hug him but you managed to stop yourself in time. You were worried about coming on too strong and opted for a small wave instead.

“Thanks for coming, Nanami! I’m so glad you came!”

Sitting at the table altogether, your other friends immediately fawned over Gojo. One of them grabbed you and whispered in your ear.

“What the hell? You didn’t tell me one of your friends was incredibly hot?”

You shrugged and ordered another round of shots for the whole table. Gojo ended up passing because he didn’t drink, so you took it upon yourself to finish it for him.

Nanami quietly nursed a beer as he observed the scene. He didn’t typically like crowded, loud bars like this, but he would make an exception for you. Gojo had also been extremely intent on making sure everyone from the school attended your little celebration. He managed to get Ijichi to come along only after getting Shoko to agree by bribing her with free alcohol.

Nanami was currently sitting across the booth from you, watching as you chatted with your friends. You were wearing a dark red dress that perfectly showed off your curves. The left strap of your dress was a little loose and it kept falling down the entire night despite you constantly readjusting it, not that Nanami had noticed.

You looked so carefree and lively in this atmosphere. Every once in a while, you caught Nanami’s gaze and beamed at him happily.

At some point during the night, you left the table to go to the bathroom. It was only once you tried walking back to everyone that you realized how drunk you were. Stumbling a bit in your high heels, you leaned against the wall by the bathrooms for stability.

“Excuse me miss, are you alright?”

A man approached you, but you instantly waved him off. “Mmm, I’m good,” you replied. “Thanks though.” You were determined to make it back to your friends on your own, but as soon as you took a step away from the wall, you tripped. The man caught you before you could hit the ground. He had a tight grip on your waist.

“You don’t seem good,” he chuckled softly. “How about I help you?” You could feel his hands starting to go lower, and you quickly latched onto them and tried to pry them off you.

“I said no,” you said firmly, but the man ignored you and pressed you against the wall. “Get off!” You struggled against him but to no avail.

Suddenly, the weight of the man was lifted and you felt like you could breathe again.

“Are you alright?” a smooth voice asked.

You looked up to see Nanami in front of you. You nodded silently and admired his strong jawline and sharp eyes in the bar’s dark lighting.

“Can you walk?”

You nodded again. Taking a step away from the wall, you immediately staggered again much to your embarrassment. Nanami grabbed your arm and lifted you up until you were half leaning on him for support. Inhibitions suddenly gone from all the alcohol in your system, you wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders and gave him a hug. The man tried to ignore the shiver that went up his spine when he felt your warm, soft body pressed up against him. He didn’t want to admit it, but he was quite jealous that you had hugged Gojo when they first arrived. What was so special about that idiot anyway? Nanami slowly wrapped his arms around you, indulging himself for once and returning the hug.

“I’m so glad you came,” you mumbled against his chest. “I was so happy that I ran into you at the bakery that one night. But I was afraid I would never see you again.” You paused. “I really wanted to see you again.”

Nanami didn’t know how to respond to your words, so he gently rubbed your back instead. You leaned into his touch happily.

“Let’s get back to the others,” he said gently. You sighed and reluctantly removed yourself from the embrace. Nanami half-carried you back to the table and carefully deposited you next to your friends. To your disappointment, he didn’t sit down next to you and instead headed towards the front doors.

“Nanami? Where are you going?” Gojo asked, eyebrows raised.

“I’ll be back.”

When Nanami exited the bar, he was greeted by several couples who were taking a smoke break. He walked a bit further away, so he could be alone. The sorcerer leaned against a random building, taking a deep breath and trying to calm himself down.

Nanami felt quite ashamed of himself. Acting like a hormonal teenage boy just because he briefly held you while you were wearing that damn dress. He tried to ignore the way his cock was straining in his pants. Gritting his teeth, he willed his body to relax. Nanami refused to let you see him so worked like this. He especially couldn’t let Gojo see. He could only imagine the endless teasing he would endure from the blindfolded idiot.

Inside the bar, you watched sadly as Nanami left. You wondered if it was something you did to scare him away.

Gojo sat next to you and handed you a glass of water. “Drink,” he commanded.

You did as you were told, keeping an eye on the doors to see if Nanami had come back in yet. “Does Nanami not like me?” you asked Gojo quietly with a pout.

The man chuckled. “I assure you that’s not the case.”

You turned to look at him. “How do you know?”

Gojo lowered his sunglasses slightly, and you were able to get a glimpse of his gorgeous blue eyes for the first time. “Trust me. I have good eyes.”

---

Nanami ended the call with Ijichi. He leaned against the wall of the bathroom with a grimace. He was still applying pressure to the wound he had received from Mahito. The sorcerer scrolled through the contacts list on his phone. He found himself hovering over your name.

Yes, he did save your number from Gojo’s text. Why wouldn’t he? It would be frivolous to ignore that kind of contact information.

Nanami grabbed another wad of paper towel to replace the one that was already drenched in blood. He grunted in pain.

A nurse, huh.

He wondered what you would do if you saw him right now. If you fuss over him and take care of his injuries yourself. Nanami sighed. He wouldn’t mind that. Would you carefully unbutton his shirt to get a better look at the wound? He could almost imagine the way your fingers would ghost over his stomach.

With a groan, Nanami banged his head against the wall. He couldn’t believe he was fantasizing about you while profusely bleeding in a public restroom.

The sorcerer cleaned up his blood all over the sink and threw out the dirty wads of paper towels. He went outside to wait for Ijichi to bring him back to school for proper treatment.

---

“I’m going to take my break!” you announced to your coworkers as you exited the bubble tea shop. You decided to go outside for a quick breather because it was such a nice, sunny day. Avoiding the crowds, you headed over to the alleyways near the shop to scroll through Twitter in peace.

You were so engrossed by your phone that you didn’t notice the presence of someone next to you. It was only when you heard them clear their throat that you looked next to you to see a man wearing sunglasses and a hat.

“Oh, sorry. Am I in your way? I can move.”

In the blink of an eye, he held a knife to your neck. You felt the cool blade lightly press into your skin. You held your breath, afraid to react in any way.

“Don’t scream. Don’t move,” he hissed.

Your eyes widened in shock.

That voice.

You recognized that voice.

The man grabbed you by the back of the neck and pulled you in the opposite direction of the busy street where unaware pedestrians were still walking by. He pressed the knife against your side now, digging it into the thin t-shirt you had to wear for work.

“Walk.”

He led you to an abandoned building several minutes away. Once you were inside and the door closed shut, he roughly shoved you to the ground.

You landed in a heap, groaning in pain. Turning around, you finally faced your captor.

“It’s you, isn’t you,” you said evenly. “Boss.”

The man chuckled, removing the hat and sunglasses. It was your former boss from the company where you and Nanami had once worked together. You dug your nails in the palms of your hands. If he was here, you knew you were in trouble.

“You called the cops, didn’t you!” he yelled at you, pointing the knife at you menacingly.

Cops? What was he talking about?

“No, I didn’t,” you replied honestly.

“You BITCH! Don’t lie to me.” He waved the knife closer at you.

“I promise! I didn’t tell anyone!”

With a shout, the man grabbed your hair and held the knife to your neck again. You squeezed your eyes shut and couldn’t help but let a small whimper leave your lips.

The truth was you weren't just fired from your job. You were threatened. When numbers weren’t adding up, you realized that your boss was embezzling money and had been doing so for a long time. He found out that you knew the truth and protected himself by forcibly ousting you from the company. As a young professional, you knew better than to fight against a big shot financial executive. When he warned you to stay quiet or face his wrath, you were wise enough to shut your mouth, clean your desk, and leave the building immediately. True to your word, you had never mentioned your boss’s crimes to anyone. You thought you were safe to move on with the rest of your life but apparently, that was not the case.

The man spat at you before roughly kicking you away. He started pacing as you wiped his spit off your cheek with a disgusted groan.

“This can’t be happening. This can’t be happening. I’m about to lose everything. EVERYTHING!”

As he muttered to himself, you tried to survey your surroundings and determine if there was a way you could safely escape. Before you could figure anything out, your old boss approached you again, knife still in hand. He seemed to have made up his mind about what he was going to do.

“You’re going to fix this. Yea. This is your fault. I’ll pin it all on you. You’ll go down for this, not me!”

As the man ranted and raved at you, something appeared in the shadows behind him. There was some movement. You blinked your eyes, wondering if it was just a trick of your imagination. But to your horror, a green creature grew larger and larger in the background. It had three heads, each with multiple eyes and giant drooling mouths with huge teeth. The monster raised its multiple arms, hovering over your boss with all eyes fixed on him like he was a piece of prey.

“Scared, aren’t you?” the man commented with a chuckle. He was misinterpreting the horrified look on your face. “This is what you get for messing with the wrong man.”

You shook your head slowly and lifted a shaky finger to point behind him.

He turned around, dropping the knife in shock.

The weapon clattered to the ground.

Your boss screamed. He immediately tried to run away, but one of the monster’s arms snatched him in a tight grip. The three heads fought with each other as if deciding which one of them would get to swallow the prize. You took that as a cue to start running.

The monster was blocking the way you entered, so you ran towards the only other door you saw, which led to a stairwell. You ran up a couple of floors before hiding in a small closet you found. It was cramped and dusty but you hoped it was enough to hide you from that creature.

Sitting on the ground, you took out your phone shakily and called the police.

“Hello, what is your emergency?”

“I’m trapped in an abandoned building, and there’s a monster here.” You realized it sounded ridiculous, but you didn’t know what else to say in the moment.

The dispatcher groaned. “This is the last time! You kids have to stop with the prank calls. This line is for emergencies only!”

They hung up on you.

You stared at your cell phone in disbelief.

Shit.

Instinctively, you scrolled through your contacts list until you found who you were looking for. You pressed the call button.

Please pick up. Please pick up.

It went to voicemail.

You cursed to yourself again.

“Nanami,” you whispered quietly, voice quivering. “I don’t know when you’ll listen to this, but you have to believe me. I’m in an abandoned building near my job, and I swear there’s a monster here. I-I think it might have killed our old boss. I don’t know what to do, I tri—”

There was a loud bang. You quickly hung up and pressed the phone into your chest while you covered your mouth and nose with your other hand to quiet your harsh breathing. The sounds got closer and closer until it sounded like it was right outside the closet door. Your heart was beating so loudly you were worried the monster would hear it. But luckily, the noises started to become fainter. Eventually, you heard nothing even after a long time of terrified waiting.

Once you were reasonably convinced the coast was clear, you quietly opened the closet door and peeked out. The hallway was empty. Maybe this was your chance to finally escape the building.

You carefully climbed to your feet and tiptoed your way back to the stairwell.

Your phone loudly chimed. The noise echoed throughout the empty building. It was a text message from your coworker asking where you went. You had forgotten to turn your phone on silent.

Almost instantaneously, the monster started roaring from the floor beneath you. You barely caught a glimpse of it before running up the stairs again until you reached the top floor. Exiting the stairway, you ran through the hallways until you reached a dead end.

Back pressed up against the wall, you watched in horror as the monster let out a sharp laugh as it approached you. There was blood dripping out of the mouths of all three heads. You didn’t want to think about where it came from. With no other options left, you weakly held your arms up in front of your face and squeezed your eyes shut with a whimper.

Suddenly, there was an angry shout and a loud splat.

You felt some sort of liquid splash all over you. Lowering your arms, an unexpected sight greeted you. It was the body of the monster all chopped up into pieces. You realized you were covered in its blood.

Behind the monster’s corpse stood Nanami. He had a covered blade in his hand that was also stained with the creature’s purple blood.

“N-Nanami?” you whispered hoarsely.

You couldn’t believe your eyes. Did he take down that monster? With a sword?

Nanami wiped the blood off his weapon, putting it away in its holster. He approached you as you shuddered violently, still in shock.

“Are you hurt?” he asked gently.

You shook your head no, wrapping your arms around yourself.

He kneeled down in front of you, taking out a handkerchief from his pocket and wiping the droplets of blood from your face.

“What was that thing?” you whispered.

Nanami sighed, twisting the handkerchief in his hands once your face was relatively clean.

“A curse.”

You gave him a confused look.

“It’s a long explanation.”

“Yo!”

You flinched as Gojo suddenly appeared out of nowhere in the hallway. You instinctively grabbed onto Nanami’s arm in fear. He glared at the blindfolded sorcerer in anger for startling you.

“Oh, you’re already done here? I thought I’d check up on you two to make sure everything’s okay.”

First, your boss had threatened you with a knife. Then, a giant monster, no, curse appeared and attacked both of you. Nanami killed said curse. And now Gojo had appeared out of thin air. Your brain was officially broken. You just wanted to go to sleep. Surely this had to be a dream. You would wake up and everything would be normal again.

“We should probably bring her to Shoko just to make sure she’s fine and clean her up,” Gojo said, observing how your eyes were starting to glaze over.

Nanami nodded in agreement. He lightly touched your shoulder, but you hardly reacted. He said your name quietly. Blinking slowly, you finally turned to acknowledge him. “I’m tired,” you mumbled.

“I know,” Nanami said gently. He picked you up in his arms. “You can go to sleep. I’ll keep you safe.” With a sigh of relief, you closed your eyes and surrendered to the darkness.

You woke up in a small room, tucked under the covers in a warm bed. Nanami was silently sitting in a chair next to you. You let out a deep breath and turned towards the man. The rustling of the covers alerted him that you were finally awake.

“Why was the boss with you?” Nanami asked suddenly.

So it wasn't a dream.

“Oh. He was trying to threaten me,” you explained. “I didn’t lose my job because I made a mistake. I found out he was embezzling money. He said the cops were starting to question him, so he accused me of reporting him.”

Nanami clenched his fists in anger. That bastard.

“Is he alive?” you asked.

“No.”

“I figured.”

You quietly observed Nanami. He had taken off his sunglasses and blazer. You admired his wide shoulders and the way his tie was slightly loosened.

“Nanami. What do you actually do?”

He shook his head. “I don’t want to tell you.”

You gripped the covers. “Why not?”

“Because,” Nanami sighed. “It’s a dangerous profession. You don’t need to be dragged into this world for no good reason.”

“What do you mean?” You didn’t understand what he was saying. “I do have a reason. It’s you.”

The man didn’t respond.

You sat up in bed suddenly. “If you won’t tell me, I’ll ask Gojo.” You started to climb out of bed, but Nanami stopped you.

“Fine. Fine. I’ll tell you. Sit back down.” He let out of a deep breath, rubbing his face.

You silently listened as Nanami discussed the existence of curses, the theories behind cursed energy, and the role of jujutsu sorcerers. He explained how the school’s true purpose was to train the next generation of sorcerers and act as the main headquarters for all jujutsu-related activities.

You only asked one question. “Why was I able to see that curse?”

“Regular humans can see them in life or death situations.”

“I see.”

Nanami was surprised at your reaction to learning about cursed spirits thus far. He expected you to ask more questions, to be more doubtful, to laugh and call him an idiot, or to scream and accuse him of being crazy. But you did none of those things. You just listened quietly and accepted everything he said as true.

In your heart, you knew there was no reason to doubt Nanami. You were trying to wrap your brain around the existence of curses you couldn’t see, but you didn’t consider that the sorcerer was lying to you for a single second. He wasn’t that kind of person.

Nanami abruptly stood up. “Ijichi will drive you back home.” He started to walk away from you, but you quickly grabbed his wrist.

“Wait, don’t go,” you pleaded, eyes wide. “I haven’t thanked you for saving me yet. Thank you, Nanami.” You didn't want him to leave you. Not yet. You didn't want to be alone.

The sorcerer refused to look at you. “I think it’s best if you kept your distance from Gojo, me, and this school.”

“What?” you breathed. “What are you saying? I-I won’t tell anyone about curses or that you’re a sorcerer if that’s what you’re worried about. I promise.”

“That’s not it. I already told you. This world is dangerous. You should stay away.” He paused. “Stay away from me.”

You flinched, releasing Nanami’s wrist. The sorcerer walked out of the room without another word. You didn’t call out after him.

As Nanami walked away, he knew he made the right decision. There was no reason for you to get involved with the jujutsu world. He wanted you to live a normal life, not one plagued by constant death and despair. He was doing this for you. For your future and your safety.

“It’s alright to be selfish every once in a while.”

Gojo’s words echoed in his mind.

No. This wasn’t about him. It was about you. It wasn’t right for him to drag you into his world. He should be happy. Happy that you would eventually move on and live a long, successful life.

But why did he feel so sad instead?

---

Numerous opened textbooks and notebooks were scattered around you on your bed. You had an upcoming exam at the end of next week and were in the midst of cramming a semester’s worth of information in your head.

There was a knock on the door.

You frowned, carefully getting off the bed and walking over to the door. You weren’t expecting any visitors or a delivery today. Looking through the peephole, you gasped. You clutched your hands against your chest, trying to calm your frantically beating heart.

What was he doing here?

You hadn’t talked to or seen Nanami since your last conversation with him at Jujutsu Tech. And that hadn't ended well. You respected his request to stay away from him and Gojo, making no attempts to contact either of the two sorcerers. Instead, you had thrown yourself into your schoolwork and picked up some extra shifts at the boba shop. The less free time you had to think about your emotions, the better.

But now the man who still weighed heavily on your heart was at your doorstep. You wondered whether or not to pretend you weren’t home, but you couldn’t bring yourself to turn him away. He had clearly come here for a good reason and you wanted to know why, especially because he was the one that told you to keep your distance from him.

You unlocked the door and opened it slightly.

“Nanami.”

He said your name quietly.

The two of you looked at each other in complete silence. You waited for him to say something, but the man just continued to stand there without a word.

“Umm, well, I have an exam I need to study for, so if you have nothing to say I’m just going to g—”

Nanami suddenly pushed the door open wider, shoving you into your apartment. You stood there in shock as the door slammed shut behind the sorcerer. His unusually aggressive behavior had you baffled.

“What’s wrong with you?” you asked sharply. The man told you to leave him alone but then showed up at your apartment and invited himself inside without a word. You couldn’t help but feel a little irritated. “What are you do— mmph!”

Nanami had pushed you against the wall and kissed you.

You froze in surprise for a second before immediately kissing him back fervently.

One of his hands had settled on your waist while the other was pressed against the wall by your head. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pressed him closer to you, unable to get enough of this man. Nanami eventually left your lips, causing you to groan in frustration before he attacked your neck with wet kisses. You panted heavily, brain suddenly fuzzy as you tried to process that this was actually happening.

“W-what happened to staying away?” you breathed as Nanami sucked on a particularly sensitive spot that left you weak.

“I changed my mind,” he muttered against your skin before continuing to attack your neck.

After Itadori had saved him from Mahito’s domain, Nanami realized he had been given a second chance. He didn’t want to live a life without regret, especially as a sorcerer. So he decided to heed Gojo’s advice for once.

He wanted to be a little selfish.

He wanted you.

Nanami pressed his forehead against yours as he rubbed his hands up and down your soft curves. You breathed heavily, trying to catch your breath as you got lost in his dark gaze.

“Bedroom,” you whispered. Nanami nodded and quickly released you, so you could guide him to your room.

As soon as you entered the bedroom, you inwardly cursed. In the heat of the moment, you had completely forgotten what you had been doing before Nanami arrived. “Uh, sorry, let me clean up real quick.”

What a way to kill the mood!

Nanami didn’t seem to mind. He looked fairly amused as you swiftly closed all the books on your bed and haphazardly tossed them on the ground. Once the bed was finally cleared, you turned around to face Nanami, but he was already one step ahead of you. He gently pushed you on the bed, so you landed on your back as he hovered over you. Your breath caught in your throat as you admired the man in front of you. He was absolutely perfect.

Nanami played with the hem of your shirt. Taking the hint, you sat up a little and swiftly removed your shirt and bra, throwing them in the corner of your room. Nanami let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding as you took in your body. You fought the urge to cover yourself, feeling slightly embarrassed at how intensely the man was looking at you.

“You’re beautiful,” he breathed as you flushed in response. He reached out with both his hands to start kneading your breasts. You moaned as he began playing with your nipples that were already hard from excitement. Nanami removed his hand from your left breast and replaced it with his mouth. You squirmed underneath him in pleasure as he lapped and sucked on your nipple. Once he was satisfied with his work, the sorcerer switched to your other breast to give it the same treatment. With every flick of his tongue, you could feel electricity run through your body. You only craved his touch more and more.

Nanami started kissing down the valley of your breasts to your stomach. He eventually reached the hem of your shorts. “May I?” he asked.

You nodded, unable to trust your voice at the moment.

As he started tugging down your shorts, you lifted your hips to assist him. The garment was carelessly tossed to the ground. Immediately, Nanami could see how soaked your underwear was with your own arousal. His dick twitched in his pants. The sight of you so wet and eager from his touch alone only heightened his lust for you.

You practically sighed in relief when Nanami removed your underwear, fully exposing yourself to him. The heat from your core was overwhelming. You needed him to touch you and relieve some of that pressure before you lost your mind. A single finger stroked your folds, already slick with arousal. You gasped while Nanami groaned, enjoying how wet you already were for him.

“I’ve barely touched you and you’re like this already,” Nanami teased. You panted, trying to grind yourself on his hand for more friction, more pressure, more anything. He chuckled seeing how desperate you were for his touch. The sorcerer finally reached your swollen nub and rubbed it leisurely. You immediately cried out, arching your hips into man’s touch.

“Fuck,” you cursed as pleasure surged throughout your veins. Your eyes were squeezed tight as Nanami continued to play with your clit. You were so distracted by his fingers that you barely registered the hot breath near your entrance. It was only when a wet tongue began to prod into you that you realized what was happening.

With a gasp, your eyes flew upon to see Nanami’s head comfortably settled between your legs as he licked at your cunt without restraint. The sight of him eating you out only stoked the raging fire inside you. You buried one of your hands in Nanami’s hair as he worked diligently to get you off. The way he lapped at your fluids and sucked at your entrance had you moaning and quivering uncontrollably.

“You taste so good,” he groaned against your folds as you barely registered his words.

A familiar pressure was building in your body. As it got stronger and stronger, you couldn’t stop your legs from thrashing about. With a growl, Nanami locked his arms around your legs to keep them as still. It only took a gentle suck to your swollen clit for the tension in your body to finally snap. Mouth opened wide in a silent scream, you writhed around on the bed as you finally reached your peak.

Your mind was completely emptied while white-hot pleasure overtook your entire body. You swore you could see stars behind your eyes. As you rode out the last waves of your orgasm, Nanami eagerly slurped up your release, refusing to let a single drop go to waste.

Once you came down from your high, you released Nanami’s hair and laid back on the bed with a sigh. He removed himself from between your legs. Your fluids still covered his face, and his normally styled hair was a complete mess from your grip. Just the sight of him was enough to cause another spark of desire to flare between your legs. This man was going to be the death of you.

“Holy fuck, Nanami,” you breathed.

“Kento,” he replied, wiping his mouth clean on his sleeve. “Call me Kento.”

You flushed. Saying his first name felt incredibly intimate.

“Kento.”

He grunted with approval and then began to unbutton his shirt. You licked your lips as his broad shoulders and wide chest were finally revealed to you. He was incredibly well-built with defined muscles and abs, but a number of scars littered his body. Some looked quite fresh while others were old and almost completely faded.

This was the body of a jujutsu sorcerer.

You now understood why Nanami warned you that the jujutsu world was unsafe. You couldn’t imagine the suffering behind all those wounds. Perhaps one day he would be willing to share his pain with you, so you could understand his world.

You wanted to rub your hands up and down Nanami’s bare chest, but he moved out of your reach to start fiddling with his belt. Eyes lowering, you swallowed nervously as you stared at the large bulge that greeted you. Nanami slid down his pants and underwear in one go, erect cock finally released from its confines and bobbing in the air slightly.

The sight of him was both mouthwatering and intimidating. You admired the bulging veins and the bits of pre-cum that were already leaking out from the tip. He wasn’t excessively long, but he was incredibly thick. You nervously wondered if you would be able to handle his impressive girth.

You wanted to touch and taste him, but Nanami wasn’t interested. He gently pushed away your eager hands and instead spread open your legs once again. At the moment, he was more concerned about prepping you than chasing after his own pleasure.

He pressed one finger into your entrance, groaning as your walls greedily sucked him inside. You gasped, clenching around him. With how easily you were able to take one finger, Nanami slipped a second into you. It didn’t hurt, but you could feel your cunt stretching around them as they thrust in and out of you. Nanami’s fingers were so thick and long that you already felt so full.

“You’re so tight,” Nanami hissed as you got lost in pleasure once again. He pushed those two fingers in and out of you, occasionally scissoring them to loosen you up. You could hear how wet you were as he continued prepping you to take his cock. Nanami moved his fingers at just the right angle to hit a spot that had you instantly moaning and clenching around him. But he suddenly removed himself from you which had you whining at the sudden loss of contact, feeling empty. However, you stopped complaining as you watched Nanami stroke his dick, spreading your fluids and his pre-cum all over himself.

“Are you on birth control or do I need a con—”

“I’m on birth control,” you cut him off impatiently. “Hurry up. I want you inside me.”

Nanami didn’t keep you waiting much longer. He lined himself at your entrance and slowly began to push in. It wasn’t painful, but you still gasped as your walls stretched to accommodate his girth. The sorcerer immediately cursed when his tip entered you. You were so hot and tight around his cock that it took all his self-restraint not to immediately ram his full length into you. With slow, shallow strokes, you were able to accommodate more and more until his entire cock was buried inside you.

You felt so incredibly full. Your hand gripped the blanket on your bed to anchor yourself as you tried to get used to the sensation of being stuffed with Nanami’s dick. He tried to remain still above you, waiting for your signal. Eventually, you met his gaze and gave a little nod. He sweetly kissed you on the lips before he started to move.

Nanami started at a slow pace afraid to hurt you at first, but he eventually settled into a rhythm that had you moaning his name over and over again. You were so wet that he slid in and out of you effortlessly, rubbing against your walls in a way that had you seeing stars again. You had wrapped your legs against his waist, allowing him to enter you even deeper.

You were almost babbling nonsense at this point, unaware of exactly what you were saying as your mind was just consumed by pleasure. “Fuck. Kento. You’re so big,” you whined. “Faster. Harder. D-don’t stop. Please don’t stop.”

Nanami adjusted the angle of his thrusts until he finally found the spot that had you gasping and clenching down on him again. He groaned, making sure to continue hitting the same exact spot with strong, fast thrusts at just the right tempo. “You’re so perfect. Looking at you, taking my cock so well,” he growled.

The pressure was building again. Everything was so overwhelming. The lewd, wet noises of your bodies moving together. The way Nanami growled praises of you in your ear. The muscles on his back rippling with exertion underneath your wandering hands. You just needed that one final push.

One of your hands sneaked down to rub your clit, but Nanami pushed it away and pressed his thumb against your swollen nub instead. Just a couple of strokes had you reaching your peak again. You clenched down so hard around Nanami that his hips stuttered, groaning loudly in your ear. You were completely consumed by wave after wave of pleasure. You couldn’t think. You couldn’t hear. You couldn’t see. All you could register was the pure bliss that racked your entire body, leaving you gasping and shuddering.

Nanami continued to fuck you through your orgasm, ramming his cock into you over and over again. His thrusts had become more frantic and uneven, chasing his own climax after you started to come down from yours.

“Where should I cum?” he groaned with gritted teeth.

You wrapped his arms around his neck and pulled him down closer to you.

“Cum inside me,” you panted against his ear.

He groaned. You were perfect. Absolutely perfect.

With a couple of more thrusts, Nanami completely buried himself inside you when he flooded your cunt with his cum. He remained inside for several more moments to catch his breath before finally removing himself from you. You slightly winced as his cock brushed past your sensitive walls. Nanami couldn’t help but admire the way his cum slowly dribbled out of you.

He laid down next to you as you both began to calm down. No words were needed between the two of you. The silence was comfortable as you cuddled against his chest. Nanami rubbed your back absentmindedly as you hummed in delight.

Eventually, the two of you got out of bed and cleaned up. The textbooks and notebooks haphazardly thrown on your floor were ignored for the rest of the day. You thought you deserved a break anyways. The two of you ate dinner together, cuddled on the couch while watching a movie, and went at it again for another round before settling down to go to sleep.

You were passed out next to Nanami, completely worn out from the day’s activities and normal sleep deprivation you had as a student. Your heavy breathing was the only sound in the tiny apartment. It strangely calmed Nanami just listening to you. He turned towards you and stroked your hair affectionately.

A part of Nanami still worried if he had made the right choice with you. He was still concerned about your safety and well-being. Would he only bring you more grief if you constantly agonized over his dangerous missions as a jujutsu sorcerer?

He let out a quiet sigh. He knew he would have regretted it if he continued to push you away. And if he was going to be a sorcerer, he wanted to be a sorcerer with no regrets.

Nanami only hoped that he would never cause you any pain and anguish because of his profession. It was rare for sorcerers and non-sorcerers to find happiness as a couple. But perhaps the two of you would be an exception.

He prayed the two of you would be an exception.

---

“Welcome! How may I help y—oh!” You blinked in surprise as three individuals walked into the small boba shop.

Gojo waved at you with an easy grin. Nanami stood next to him as handsome and stoic as ever, but there was a new face behind them. He looked like a high schooler.

The blindfolded teacher wrapped his arms around the boy’s shoulder and pointed at him. “Meet Yuji Itadori! One of our first-year students!”

“Oh, it’s nice to meet you,” you said introducing yourself.

The boy tilted his head, looking at you curiously. “How do you know Gojo-sensei and Nanamin?”

Nanamin?

You chuckled at the cute nickname.

“I told you to stop calling me that, Itadori,” Nanami replied, clearly bothered.

“Well, I’m…” you hesitated. You didn’t know what to say. A friend? An ex-coworker? A normal person who couldn't see curses but knew about their existence?

“She’s Nanami’s girlfriend!” Gojo exclaimed to your horror. You immediately flushed and looked to Nanami for him to clarify, but he didn’t react. He glared at the blindfolded sorcerer as per usual but didn’t refute the statement. Your eyes widened in realization.

“Uh, y-yeah,” you stammered. “I guess I am.”

“Nanamin has a girlfriend!?” Itadori gasped. He had even more respect for his mentor now.

“Don’t sound so surprised,” Nanami growled much to your amusement.

You took their orders and began to prepare the drinks. Nanami and Idatori were talking in the corner while Gojo hung out at the counter near you. You had just finished sealing the drinks when the teacher explained something to you.

“Oh, by the way, Yuji is supposed to be dead so be sure to not mention his existence to anyone else.”

You almost dropped the drink you were holding. “Um, okay.” You thought it was better not to ask questions.

Gojo thanked you as he took his drink from your hand and grabbed a straw for himself. “Yo! Nanami! Yuji! Grab your drinks and let’s head out!”

Itadori followed Gojo out the door once he had his milk tea, but Nanami stayed behind.

“I meant it.”

“Huh?” you asked, cleaning the counter with a rag.

“I want you to be my girlfriend.”

You blinked, processing his words. A bright smile grew on your face. “Well, according to Gojo, I’m already your girlfriend.”

Nanami let out a rare chuckle and flashed you a small smile. “I’ll see you tonight.”

“Goodbye!” You waved as he left the shop.

Your coworker came out of the back room, looking at you suspiciously. “Why are you so smiley?” She looked around the empty shop. “There’s no one here.”

“Oh, no reason," you replied with a hum.

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