#like be so fucking serious. that's so goddamn funny

[elytrafemme]

finished watching fight club. i've got a lot of thoughts that can be summarized into "holy shit. faggot behavior. good fucking movie." but one thing i won't be spilling to my college friend masses is that this movie is like. scary close to what it was like interacting with nightshade and dahlia for the first time. did i ever fucking talk about them? obviously the second one but. christ. like i truly cannot express to you how fucked this is from an integrated (?) system (?) perspective.

[lowpolyshadow]

Something i don't really agree or get is fandom perspective of shadow being lame,cringe and bastard meow meow cus that's not really it either(surviving and trying to cope with the horrors? The coolest thing), more like a modern distorted loved notion of people, yeah is funny but also projected and kinda westernized(the inaccurated dub versions and dialogue), leaning away from the original cultural backgrourd that get's sleep on and puts a more nuanced perception of the games. Idk where im going with this but i don't get people popular perspectives idk sorry im a killjoy i just love the fucked up aspect of this silly franchise and it's characters(i wish it could get that deep again).

theres a lot of things that indicate shadow is a cringe little bastard from jp to eng, it’s like his whole. Thing. the fanon flanderization of shadow is crazy but the part where he’s a bastard is pretty blatant in canon

like, he’s genuinely cool and stuff, he has a lot of fantastic moments (if the world chooses to become my enemy i will fight as i always have, the entire somewhat ridiculous yet awesome finale of shadow the hedgehog, sa2’s ending literally cemented his popularity so hard he came back to life in heroes because people thought he was fucking awesome and compelling), but a big appeal is the fact that he’s also still a silly guy in a series full of whacky silly guys

the eng and jp dubs have their differences in tone in a lot of ways, and eng is not incredibly accurate bc of it, but shadow even in jp is still like. a loser (affectionate)—he’s constantly talking about how much better he is, he insists on showing his dominance over sonic (and others, but especially sonic) even when it doesnt fucking matter ala tsr, he constantly FULLY believes he is the most correct person in any and all situations, and that his actions are always the best way to go about it even if it’s reckless or sometimes unnecessary (the mow things in my way down solution)

he’s so earnest in everything he does, in his own special cringe little way, where he’ll say factually correct statements in a blunt manner, but also not quite … ? he’s very honest. he’s incredibly straightforward. every single comment he says, no matter how fucking absurd or edgy or funny, he truly means it. thats his APPEAL he says shit like “ive hit the ultimate jackpot!” and “this is like taking candy from a baby, which is fine by me!” and somehow also “no one else should experience the things ive gone through” and thats all FANTASTIC

i like this twitter thread and a lot of jib’s threads on shadow, bc they know a lot more about the jp side of things, but tldr: shadow is my funny little guy. my stupid little pogchamp. my cringe little bastard boy who is the coolest and also the lamest motherfucker ive ever witness. i’m going to dribble him like a basketball

[froggyrights]

are you leaving? sorry for asking :/

Not sure yet :') being in this fandom takes such a huge toll on me when shit hits the fan that i cant really justify to myself staying and being invested in the same capacity as I have been. However I love my mutuals and this community too damn much to just up and leave completely 😭 for now im gonna take a break from tumblr and just give it some time. I could never leave tumblr fully though I fear I'm a yapper at heart so maybe I'll just end up posting about whatever. I really don't know ! I'll figure it out !!

[possiblytracker]

gods wettest saddest most pathetic creature wandering despairingly through long cold airport corridor to find exit after dropping off beloved friend and grappling with the realisation that this feeling is going to recur throughout the rest of their life forever and ever but maybe the incredible lifechanging love and companionship they have and will get to experience along with it makes it all worth it now and for the future. even if right now in this corridor it still hurts like a motherfucker

[crowholtz]

Helene's stats are just so funny to me. That Charisma is delightful.

[literallysatanofficial]

well dennis losing the titty poll made me watch all the way up to mac and dennis move to the suburbs, i didn't mean to binge that much at once but honestly kinda hate most of 11 anyway so i had to keep going,,,

[feline-evil]

So the mtl s2 finale really grabbed me by the bawls full force goddamn

[thecherrygod]

i love meeting weirdos and freaks on my phone bc i feel i cant be like that with people i meet irl. i have a friend and sometimes we send eachother shit and hes like "this is weird/fucked up/dark humor" kinda thing and like... for the first two its never like that but like whatever we dont know eachother enough to know the limits, and the dark humor isnt exactly funny imo.

idk how to tell this guy, that ive met in class, that im just a kinda horny dumbass and that my sense of humor relates to that. like babygirl id send you that blowjob ninja post i rbed not too long ago but yet again whats the fucking limit

[synthetic-sonata]

it is so fucking hard to rp when you have anxiety this shit sucks

[sinning-23]

Calling Them By Their Full Name

OPLA Headcannons! I thought htis was a funny little thing lol. Anyway enjoy

Warnings: slight mentions of nsfw topics but nothing too serious

Sorry for any spelling errors!

Luffy

-ohhhhh that did not sound like your usual happy, loving voice.

-he knows he fucked up and now he’s hiding from your wrath.

-“MONKEY D. LUFFY, GET YOUR ASS IN THIS KITCHEN. NOW.”

-you could hear a pen drop from how quiet the ship got

-ok so maybe he ate that super expensive, super special dessert you had been saving for a while now. And like, it was going to go bad! All he wanted was a little taste! Than a taste turned into accidentally eating the whole thing.

-He was gonna tell you, honest! But it had proven obvious you found out before he could. He seen you round the corner with RAGe on your face and tears in your eyes.

-"TRAITOR!" You yell, throwing a tired punch to his chest.

-“I’m sorry mami, I’ll find you another one. Promise.” He hums, peppering your face with kisses, squeezing your face between his palms when he did.

-There’s no way you could stay mad at him for long

Zoro

-whoa whoa whoa why are you so ANNNGRY

-hated when you call him by his full name like that, makes him feel like a child being reprimanded

-“RORONOA GODDAMN ZORO.” You boom, Nami’s jaw dropping at the sound. Even she could tell you were pissed

-he’s the sassiest mf alive so he’ll probably just be like, “who the hell are talking to woman?!”

-“You’re a real piece of work you know that??” You’re still yelling and he wastes no time rolling his eyes at you and grabbing you by your waist, the action shutting you up.

“Wanna stop yelling and be a big girl and tell me what’s wrong?” He teases, that stupid smirk you love falling over his features at your speechlessness.

-It’s not often you say his full make but when you do he makes sure you’ll never forget it that same night.

-“Say my name baby, real loud.” He groans, a hand around your throat to steady spent body as he slams back into you

Sanji

-I know thats not a cigarette i smell Vinsmoke Sanji."

-awe hell. Yout tone is deadly. he tried he damndest to stomp it out before you rounded the corner but nope.

-You never use his full name like that. Never.

-did he just get chills?

-"Of course not my love!" He lies throigh his teeth but before he can say anything ese you re lips are on his, you fist gripping the fabric of his shirt.

-He knew he was caught, the taste of tobacco mixing with your usual mint. You pull away, smoothing his shirt out with a warning smile.

-"Don’t lie to me again, I’ll always know when you do, Black Leg." You explain , taking the small cardboard box from his pocket and walking off.

-Even though it was ment as a threat, he couldn't help but feel hotter than ususal. God he loved it when you talked all serious to him.

Bonus: Mihawk

-You know better than to use his full name. Orr to even call him anything besides the usual endearing pet name.

-So when he hears his name called with nothing short of rage, hes trying to figure out who you think you’re talking to.

-"Dracule. Mihawk." You spit, holding the empty bottle in your hand

-Ok so your rage was warented cause he managed to drink the entire vintage bottle of wine you'd been saving...it wasn’t like it was on purpose!

-He doesn’t even bother to look up from his book, just barely giving you a slight glance when you were right in front of him, pointing to the bottle.

-"Id watch your tone darling." he warns, smirking at the way you purse your lips and turn away with a fierce attitude he'd be sure to deal with later.

-“Oh shove it up your ass Dracule.” You scoff, trying to quicken your pace but failing when he’s already behind you, his much larger hand holding your wrist as you yelp.

-His look says it all. You’re screwed.

-So now you’re sitting pretty, bent over and counting each time his hand meets the sore and slightly reddened flesh of your ass.

-“Now, what’s my name again darling?”

[eldritchdilf]

Every other episode House is literally just out there loudly proclaiming the most unsubtle limp-wristed shit like "I carnally desire James Wilson from oncology and I wish he'd just take me out for a goddamn candle-lit dinner at a French bistro" and everyone just goes "Greg please be fucking serious" before shoving shit in his face like diagnostic charts and court papers and it's just. It's so fucking funny how he's just been dead-serious from the start he's got the most potent case of boy-who-cried-homo and it's taking me the fuck out

[chimaerra]

something excruciating about having so many things that are so mine and only mine and my best friend keeps well meaningly taking them

[sam24]

Man on a Mission

Summary: Apparently, someone called Bucky's girl a whore. He has now made it his life's mission to find out who.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!reader

*****

Bucky sat at the kitchen island, eyes narrowed, leg bouncing, and the same scene from last night replaying in his head.

Bucky drew random patterns on your bare shoulder, his nose buried into your hair. You were being quieter than usual, but he knew you were awake as he could feel your hands fidgeting.

He didn’t want to press you to tell him about it, so he settled on making you feel as loved as possible, pressing kisses into your hair.

Suddenly, you broke the silence, taking Bucky by surprise.

“Buck . . . do you think I’m a whore?”

“Wha-” Bucky lifted his head immediately, trying to look at you. But you hid your face in your hands, turning away from him.

“God don’t look at me. Fuck, this is so embarrassing,” You groaned into your hands. “Forget I said that.”

��No, honey, look at me please,” Bucky gently pulled your hands down, cradling your face. “Who called you that?”

“No, no, no one,” You shook your head frantically. “I’m sorry, just forget I said anything. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“No, sweetheart, who- okay we’ll get back to that later. But you are not a whore, okay? No woman deserves to be called that in the first place. Who-”

“No, no one. I was just . . . I just randomly thought of it.”

Bucky wasn’t convinced, but he let it slide.

For now.

“Well, I don’t want you thinking these things about yourself.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead. “Okay?”

You nodded, seeming relieved and a little surprised that he dropped it that easily.

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

It was now the next morning, and you were at the gym with Natasha, which gave Bucky the perfect opportunity to figure out who to murder.

Steve walked into the kitchen with Sam trailing behind.

“Morning Buck.” Steve greeted. His head stuck into the fridge, trying to look past the shit ton amount of edible cookie dough you had made a couple days earlier.

“How come you didn’t come run with us, you lazy fat ass.” Sam teased, leaning on the island.

“Didn’t feel like it.” Bucky narrowed his eyes.

Suspect 1: Sam Wilson, The Most Annoying Bird Alive

Sam had a tendency to poke fun at people, but some might not take it as well as others. For example, when a barista burst out in tears last week when Sam joked about her being “all over the place” with all the orders coming in. (He came in with flowers the next day)

Bucky wondered if Sam had said something that was supposed to be funny, but you didn’t think it was and got upset.

A part of Bucky wanted to settle on Sam so he had an excuse to beat him up, but the more rational side of him realized that you had gone on one too many missions with him to think he was being serious about anything he said.

Tony then came in, holding a bunch of empty coffee mugs in his hand, practically throwing them into the sink.

“Bruce said my mugs were ‘taking up too much room’ in the lab,” Tony rolled his eyes. “Well why doesn’t he try being the goddamn genius backbone of this team.”

Bucky stared at him intently.

Suspect 2: Tony Stark, The Dick Who Can’t Set His Metal Rock Music Lower Than 98

Tony had a tendency to snap easily, especially when he was low on sleep (which was basically all the time). Everyone usually steered clear of Tony when he was moody, because he would most definitely say the meanest things, but not really mean any of it.

Bucky tried to think if it was logical that Tony would snap at you and say something. However, he came to the conclusion that even if Tony had said something, you had known him for too long to take his sleep-deprived words to heart.

“What are you looking at, Winter Schnitzel?” Tony challenged, noticing Bucky staring at him.

“Nothing.” Bucky replied, his stare shifting over to his best friend, who was grinning in amusement, but still trying to find something to eat that wouldn’t give him diabetes.

Suspect 3: Steve Rog-

Bucky stopped himself, almost laughing at himself for thinking Steve would ever call a woman a whore.

Even though you always kept the fridge full of random items you would make, Steve would never say a single bad thing about you.

For now, Bucky was stuck.

⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃

6 hours later, and Bucky was still stuck.

You and Peter were out (God knows where), which was another perfect chance for Bucky to think.

But the problem was he couldn’t think of anyone.

Everyone in the compound adored you, so Bucky couldn’t figure out who the hell would deliberately say something to make you upset.

He dragged his shoes across the floor, cursing Steve in his head for making him go on a “stroll” because he apparently looked “pent-up”.

There was no way in hell Bucky would walk around outside, so he opted to take a walk inside, using Mother Steve’s demand to his advantage to scout out potential targets.

He halfheartedly glanced around the floor, stopping when his gaze landed on you.

He immediately grinned, not caring about the fact he probably looked crazy, and started his way over to where you were.

You were talking to someone with a bag in your hand. Bucky remembered you saying something about picking up a dress from the store for your friend. Peter was next to you, and for some reason, puffing his chest out?

But, as Bucky got closer, he realized you were talking to Jacob, the little dickwad who couldn’t take no for an answer,

“How many times do I have to tell you? Get out of my way. I’m trying to get this to someone.” Bucky heard you snap, tuning in with his enhanced hearing.

Bucky stopped, trying to assess the situation and figure out if you would appreciate him stepping in or not.

He knew you didn’t need anyone to stand up for you, but his overprotective side rippled through his body, his jaw clenching and fists balling.

“Baby, stop acting- “Jacob was cut off with a sharp slap.

The little bastard was taken by complete shock.

Meanwhile, Peter was still trying to look as intimidating as possible.

“Jacob, what the hell is your problem? I’ve told you to leave me alone more times than I can count. How fucking thick is your skull?”

Jacob was about to reply, with probably something bitchy, but he caught sight of Bucky in the corner with the most murderous glare and stopped himself.

He instead looked down and stepped to the side, giving you and Peter room to go.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. Beat it.” Peter growled in the most non-threatening way possible as you two left, giving Bucky the perfect chance to slide in before Jacob could hightail out of there.

“Barnes.” Jacob greeted, clearing his throat.

“Callaway.” Bucky’s blood boiled at how differently he treated other men than how he treated women. “Didn’t your mother ever teach you to respect a lady?”

Before Jacob could reply, his equally dumb friend, Brody, walked past the two men.

“Damn, Jake. Barnes finally here to beat you up for calling his girl a whore?”

Bucky and Jacob both stared at Brody.

Jacob looked sickly pale, and Bucky looked calmly terrifying. Clear sign he was fucking enraged.

“Oh shit-” Brody finally put the pieces together, practically sprinting away.

Bucky turned back to face a petrified looking Jacob.

“So,” Bucky reached out, fixing Jacob’s tie and smoothing down his collar. “It was you, huh?”

Jacob tensed under Bucky’s touch.

“Chill pal, I just wanna talk.”

⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃⭃

A bruised cheek, wet underwear, and hurt ego later, Jacob’s talk with Bucky was over.

Bucky threw his feet up on the ottoman, but not before telling Friday to make sure Jacob was apologizing to you, as instructed by Bucky himself.

He patiently waited for you on the couch, a wide grin appearing on his face as you walked in and cuddled up next to Bucky, but not without pressing a kiss to his lips first.

Halfway through the movie, you turned to look at Bucky.

“Thank you,” You smiled.

“For what, doll?”

You turned back to face the movie, a smile playing at your lips. “C’mon. I know that was you. He would never apologize on his own will.”

Bucky laughed, turning you around once again to pepper kisses all over your face.

“I love you, my little smartass.”

“I love you too, pops.”

Mission accomplished.

[podcastenthusiast]

I know the show's creator didn't intend for Edwin to be autistic, but that's the guy they ended up with so... I think more of those "the boys are alive temporarily" fics should deal with what a fucking sensory nightmare it would be for Edwin.

I mean, outside of Hell he hasn't really felt anything for decades, and suddenly there's so many goddamn textures and smells and even the clothes he wears like armor don't feel quite right against his skin, probably because they feel at all. Plus he has to eat now?!

Charles would be so keen for him to try all sorts of foods but being so overstimulated I doubt Edwin could really handle more than like a tortilla with some peanut butter on it initially. He doesn't want to ruin this for Charles though, who hated being dead, so Edwin really does try his best to enjoy the time they have alive, but it's all just too overwhelming and he ultimately sends himself into a bit of a meltdown.

Even worse, now they have to serious talk about not ignoring your own needs because you think it will make your best friend happy ("that's my job anyway, innit?" Charles jokes, which Edwin doesn't think is very funny.)

[steddielations]

Steve doesn’t know if he should say something.

He knows, he obviously knows that Eddie’s been taking his clothes.

It’s like a routine at this point. They’ll be hanging around Steve’s pool or up on his roof getting high, Eddie will say he’s cold no matter what he’s wearing or how warm it is. And if Steve’s not wearing a jacket to give him, Eddie will go ruffle through Steve’s closet and at the end of the night, he always “forgets” to give it back before he leaves.

Steve’s not sure if Eddie’s just doing it to fuck with him or if it’s an actual reason. Like Eddie doesn’t have clothes, or his washer is broken and he can’t afford to fix it, or he doesn’t have money for the laundromat or something serious that Steve does not want to be insensitive about, but he’s seriously running out of clothes.

For fuck’s sake, he’s wearing his Christmas sweater from two years ago, he literally had nothing else in his closet.

He’s starting to think that’s the endgame here, that Eddie’s just waiting until Steve shows up bare ass naked so he can laugh in his face.

Finally, Steve decides to get some answers while they’re hanging out in Eddie’s room, wearing his too-small Christmas sweater that Eddie’s already teased him about.

“Eddie, is… is everything like… okay?”

Steve asks carefully, picking at threads on Eddie’s comforter.

Eddie’s fingers pause on his guitar strings, joint hanging out of his mouth as he gives Steve a curious look.

“You mean just in general or…? Because I’m far from what someone like yourself would consider “okay” but that’s normal for me.”

Steve looks around the room, noting the usual piles of Eddie’s clothes, recognizing a lot of his own. Doesn’t seem like Eddie’s in any shortage of things to wear, and his laundry always piles up. Nothing looks out of sorts, maybe he just hasn’t felt like doing it lately, and Steve doesn’t want to be insensitive if that’s the case either.

He minds his words, “I mean like, are things okay for you? Like around the house, your refrigerator’s working, your washing machine isn’t broken or anything?”

Eddie smirks, “What if they’re not? Is Handyman Harrington gonna put on his little toolbelt and fix it all up?” He always makes light when he senses something uneasy coming.

“Real funny. I’m serious, Eddie. Is there a reason you haven’t done laundry? If you’re not feeling up to it or something, I don’t mind helping.”

Eddie sobers a little then, putting his guitar down and dabbing out the joint in the ashtray on the bedside table, “Yes my washing machine works. Yes I can do my laundry, I’m just lazy as shit and letting it pile up. What’s this about, Steve?”

“Because you—” Steve runs his fingers through his hair, pulling it, flustered, “I’m literally wearing my Christmas sweater in goddamn October because you have all my clothes, dude.”

Something registers in Eddie’s gaze but he quickly deflects, laughing, “Oh is that why? I thought you just pulled out that little number ‘cause it's skin tight, you minx.”

“Is everything okay?” Steve doesn’t let him change the subject, offering gently, “If you need to borrow some money or use my washer or something then—”

“No, no that’s not it,” Eddie shakes his head, smile gone, seeming kind of nervous now, “I don’t need anything like that, Stevie.”

Steve sighs, at a loss, “So why do you keep taking my clothes, Eddie?”

Eddie lets out a small laugh, almost sad, a little bitter, “You’re really gonna make me say it, Harrington?”

“Say what? You can tell me,” Steve scoots closer to him on the bed. He tries to meet Eddie’s gaze, to make sure he knows he can tell Steve. Fuck, they saved the world together, they almost died together, he knows he can tell Steve anything.

So it sort of hurts when Eddie won’t look at him, or answer him, but Steve tries to be understanding.

“Okay,” he sighs, resigned, “It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me, but I’m just gonna need some of them back if that’s alright—”

“God, you really are something,” Eddie gives that same bitter laugh. It hurts, mostly because Steve knows there’s something deeper here, something’s hurting Eddie and he won’t tell Steve. “Of course, it’s alright. They’re your clothes, it’s not even… Fuck, it’s not even about the clothes.”

“So you were just fucking with me then?”

Eddie shakes his head, hands tugging his own hair, the way he does when he’s anxious, “No, it wasn’t a prank Steve.”

“You’re trying out a different style?”

“Definitely not.”

“Dustin dared you, or something?”

“No, it’s not like that—”

“So then why did you do it? I don’t—”

“Shit, Steve, I’m— I took them because they smell like you, alright?”

Steve’s mouth opens and closes several times.

“I… You… What?”

Eddie won’t look him in the eyes, sighing sharply down at the bed, “Don’t make me say it again.”

Steve blinks, asking slowly, “You… like the way that I smell?”

Eddie finally looks up at him, a heavy cloud behind his dark eyes as he admits, “Yes I do and not in a friend sort of way. In a way that I’m literally stealing all your clothes like a fucking weirdo just to feel like I’m hugging you at night, or something— I dunno, Steve. It helps with the nightmares.”

Steve’s heart is sort of doing flips in his chest.

That’s another reason why he waited so long to say anything. He doesn’t mind Eddie taking some of his clothes. He likes the idea of Eddie wearing everything that’s his, and not just as a friend helping out another friend. In a deeper way, in a way that he’s been suppressing because he didn’t want to ruin things with Eddie.

“That could still be a friend thing,” Steve says carefully, hoping that Eddie disagrees.

“It’s not a friend thing,” Eddie shakes his head, starting to move away from the bed and Steve’s stomach drops, “I don’t have ‘friend’ feelings for you, Steve. So I get it if you wanna walk out that door and never talk to me again. I’ll give all your clothes back, I shouldn’t have—”

Steve’s hand shoots out to Eddie’s knee, stopping him, rushing to say, “I don’t like you as a friend either.”

Eddie quickly looks up, expression careful, confused, “You— huh?”

“Fuck, that came out wrong, I just…” Steve sighs, bolsters himself up and rubs Eddie’s knee softly but with intent as he asks, “Eddie, can I hug you in a not-friend way?”

Eddie’s eyes flick up and down between Steve’s hand and his face about ten different times, gaze utterly wild, “Are you saying you have feelings for—”

“Just get over here and find out.”

Eddie’s grin mirrors Steve’s as he crawls across the bed. He’s tentative still, careful, so Steve just goes in, wrapping his arms around Eddie and pulling him against his chest. Eddie goes willingly, sliding his palms across Steve’s stupid Christmas sweater, his nose at Steve’s collar, breathing in deep.

Steve chuckles as Eddie burrows in, mumbling something about how good he smells.

Steve loves the way Eddie smells too, nuzzling into his hair, breathing in a hint of shampoo, smoke and something earthy, something Eddie. Steve loves the way he feels too, wants him impossibly closer.

“So why did you need so many of my clothes?” He asks softly after a while.

Eddie doesn’t lift his head when he replies, “Works best when the Steve smell is still strong. Had to get more when I sniffed it all up.”

Steve rolls his eyes, something like fondness tugging at his lips.

“You said it helps with nightmares?”

Eddie nods against him, admitting quietly, “On nights when my uncle works, it gets kinda creepy being alone here. Just having something that smells like you makes it feel like— I dunno, like you’re here with me. It’s weird.”

“It’s not. I wish I would’ve thought of that when my nightmares were bad,” instead of just not sleeping, or calling Robin all hours of the night. “Your uncle works tonight, right?”

“Yeah, he… yeah.”

Steve feels like he should be more nervous than he is, but Eddie hasn’t let up since the second Steve pulled him in, so he feels like he’s on the right track here.

“What if I stayed over? I have a feeling you’ll like hugging my sweater even more when I’m inside it.”

That makes Eddie burrow further into his neck, pressing a smile there.

“Already trying to get into my bed, Harrington? Should wait until at least the third hug for that,” playfully, Steve gives his side a little pinch, both of them chuckling, “Yeah, I’d like it if you stayed.”

Satisfied with that answer, Steve takes a risk, carefully wraps his hand around the back of Eddie’s legs, tugging a little to pull Eddie into his lap. Thankfully, Eddie wants it too. He sits atop Steve’s thighs and just melts into him, both of them sighing against each other.

Steve rubs broad circles across Eddie’s back, soothing the fabric of his yellow sweater that seems to be Eddie’s favorite to steal. He smiles into Eddie’s hair, feeling so warm and buzzing pleasantly all over.

It could’ve been hours gone by, Steve basking in Eddie’s body heat, in the weight of him, condensation forming against his neck where Eddie’s breathing him in. He pulls back a little, studies the blissed out look on Eddie’s face.

He blinks slowly at Steve, “Hey.”

Steve shakes his head, chuckling softly, “Hey, dummy.”

“Dummy?” Eddie parrots, grinning.

“Yeah. You’d rather steal my entire wardrobe than just give me a hug?” Steve squeezes him a little, “What if you wanted to kiss me, hm? Would you steal my chapstick?”

He lets his eyes linger on Eddie’s lips, hoping he gets the hint, takes the subtle offer.

Eddie’s finger toys with his collar, brushing the bone there as he murmurs back, “If you’d just kiss me I wouldn’t have to steal your chapstick to know how you taste.”

Steve tips his head back with a soft laugh before cupping Eddie’s face, “God, c’mere, you idiot,” then leans in and presses their smiling lips together.

It’s sweet at first, just gently pecking each other. Then the kisses last longer, grow deeper, tasting each other. Steve’s mouth falls open in a sigh, letting Eddie lick inside, sucking lightly on his lip.

Kissing Eddie is everything, a deep warmth simmering in Steve’s bones that he can’t get enough of. He wants it all over him, wants to clothe himself in it, burrow inside Eddie and never come out.

He leans back against the pillows, taking Eddie with him in his lap. The movement makes them rub together in a way that has Steve humming against Eddie’s lips, gripping his hips as a new kind of pleasure lights inside him.

Eddie pulls back then, laughing breathlessly.

“Okay,” he nuzzles their noses together, grinning as he mumbles, “We gotta relax or I’m gonna have to steal another pair of your underwear too.”

Steve playfully rolls his eyes as he moves his hands elsewhere, wrapping them around Eddie’s back.

Then, a beat later, it clicks and his brows furrow.

“Wait, what do you mean another pair, Munson?”

Eddie laughs and quickly dives back in for another kiss, silencing any more questions from Steve.

Ao3 Link

[theemissuniverse]

DEAF! LESBIANFEM!READER WITH MK 11 CHARACTER INTROS

SUMMARY : You’re a deaf kombatant that can read lips extremely well. Your power is all knowing. You are half Earthrealmer and half Outworlder. (You mainly grew up in Earthrealm though) Everyone in Outworld knows sign language. Some Earthrealmers also know sign language or at least a little bit.

This is more an x reader with Cassie Cage, Kitana, Jacqui Briggs, Mileena, and Skarlet but with funny intros with other characters

Also love friendship between Kano and (Y/N) in this

WARNINGS : suggestive

MASTERLIST 1 , MASTERLIST 2

Italics mean the reader is signing. Not speaking

Cassie Cage : You know, I just got the perfect man for you

(Y/N) : If you say Kenshi I will strangle you

Cassie Cage : Sheesh. Nevermind

Cassie Cage : So tell me why you and Kenshi won’t work again?

(Y/N) : I am deaf…he is blind…how will he be able to see me sign to him?

Cassie Cage : Well now that you mention it…

(Y/N) : Why are you so persistent to set me up with someone?

Cassie Cage : Okay, I know the Kenshi thing was stupid but Takeda? He’s right for you

(Y/N) : His son?!

Cassie Cage : Um, why didn’t you tell me you liked girls?!

(Y/N) : You didn’t ask me

Cassie Cage : We’ll, guess I gotta call off the date I set up with you and Takeda

Cassie Cage : Wait. If you’re all knowing then does that mean you know-

(Y/N) : That you have a crush on me? Yes. Very much so

Cassie Cage : Goddamn it!

Cassie Cage : If you’re all knowing then does that mean you’ve seen me naked?

(Y/N) : It does not work like that but you can give me a demo if you want

Cassie Cage : *nervous laugh* Is it getting hot in here?

(Y/N) : I’ll whip you with your own pistol

Erron Black : If you’re doing it then I’m into it

(Y/N) : I gotta start off conversation saying ‘I like girls’ when I battle you people

Jacqui Briggs : If you’re all knowing then who’s gonna win the fight?

(Y/N) : Me. Obviously

Jacqui Briggs : Are you just saying that because you’re a bitch or are you serious?

Jacqui Briggs : Takeda is mine, (Y/N)

(Y/N) : I’m more interested in you

Jacqui Briggs : Oh shit-

Jacqui Briggs : I’m taking you out, (Y/N)

(Y/N) : I’m flattered but Cassie will be crushed

Jacqui Briggs : What? That’s not what I meant -

Jax : If you knew about other timelines, why didn’t you say anything?

(Y/N) : Nobody asked me

Jax : That’s the stupidest thing I ever heard

Johnny Cage : So why do you gotta be mute and deaf?

(Y/N) : You are a fucking idiot

Johnny Cage : I’m a fucking idiot? Well-can’t argue with you there

Johnny Cage : If you’re deaf then how come you can read my lips?

(Y/N) : I’m deaf. Not blind you idiot.

Johnny Cage : All I got from that is you calling me an idiot.

Johnny Cage : Okay, this sign language thing is hard

(Y/N) : How did your daughter pick up on it and you didn’t?

Johnny Cage : Yeah. I didn’t understand a word you just signed

Johnny Cage : Stop flirting with my daughter

(Y/N) : Trust me, a Cage is not my type

Johnny Cage : I don’t know if I should be offended by that

Kabal : Kano’s gotta soft spot for you

(Y/N) : Of course he does. Have you seen me?

Kabal : I don’t see the hype

(Y/N) : I am surprised you of all people know sign language.

Kano : You think I don’t do my work with deaf people? I’m not an ableist. Murderer yes but not that

(Y/N) : Dear God…

Kano : How can you tell I have an accent?

(Y/N) : Your mouth moves different than an American

Kano : That’s fucking cool

Kano : Come join the Black Dragaon, love

(Y/N) : So I can run from an ugly blonde with a gun? No thanks

Kano : She is ugly isn’t she?

Kitana : You know that I’m with Liu Kang, (Y/N)

(Y/N) : Ugh. Mr. Chosen one. Come be with a real woman

Kitana : Find her and I’ll be with her

(Y/N) : Liu Kang can’t handle all of that.

Kitana : *laughs* And you can?

(Y/N) : Very simple. Yes.

(Y/N) : I’m standing in front of the embodiment of beauty

Kitana : Flattery will not save you in this fight

(Y/N) : Well I tried

(Y/N) : He can’t give you what I can give you

Kitana : You know if you’d just asked me out before him then I would’ve been with you

(Y/N) : Wait…I actually had a chance??

Kitana : Skarlet is bad news, (Y/N)

(Y/N) : At least she actually likes me

Kitana : I did like you

(Y/N) : Your sister is obsessed with me

Kitana : She is hardly my sister

(Y/N) : Mileena was right. You are annoying

Kung Lao : You know you like me

(Y/N) : I tolerate you

Kung Lao : In my world, that’s the same thing

(Y/N) : I’m not interested, Kung Lao

Kung Lao : Kitana will never go for you

(Y/N) : I don’t need second rate monk to tell me that

Kung Lao : Why didn’t you just say you liked girls?!

(Y/N) : Even if I did like men-you would not be my type

Kung Lao : I’m everyone’s type

Kung Lao : So say if you did like men…who are you picking? Me or Liu Kang?

(Y/N) : You really want me to answer that?

Kung Lao : *sighs*

(Y/N) : Your friend may not pick up on my signing but tell him I am not interested

Liu Kang : Oh he knows but that won’t stop him

(Y/N) : Let’s see if a grave does

Liu Kang : I heard you have affections for Kitana

(Y/N) : Does that bother you, monk?

Liu Kang : I mean this in the humblest way possible, I am not threatened by you

(Y/N) : Mr. Chosen One

Liu Kang : You were always jealous of me, (Y/N)

(Y/N) : I wouldn’t be jealous of you if it bit me on the ass

Mileena : I can treat you better than my sister

(Y/N) : What are you gonna do? Eat me?

Mileena : Isn’t that what you’re interested in?

(Y/N) : Tell your father that I’m not joining his concubines

Mileena : None sense. You will be mine

(Y/N) : Holy shit

Mileena : My sister is missing out on you

(Y/N) : You’re implying that you have me

Mileena : Soon I will

Mileena : If I were Kitana, I would’ve picked you

(Y/N) : Smart and…a little freaky looking. I like it

Mileena : You will like more

Noob Saibot : We admire your skills in kombat

(Y/N) : Thanks dark shadow thing

Noob Saibot : But they will not save you from me

(Y/N) : People doubt me because I am deaf

Raiden : That is the advantage you have

(Y/N) : They won’t ever see me coming

(Y/N) : How come I wasn’t the chosen one?

Raiden : Are you prepared for-

(Y/N) : That sounds like too much work

Shao Kahn : You will join my concubines

(Y/N) : Read my hands. Hell no.

Shao Kahn : I wouldn’t be so convinced

Skarlet : You have infinite knowledge

(Y/N) : A blessing and a curse

Skarlet : Feed it to me

Skarlet : Your affections for Kitana are ridiculous

(Y/N) : Enlighten me

Skarlet : There are far better women in front of you

Skarlet : Your skills are far greater than a regular warrior

(Y/N) : Aw. You flirting with me, Skarlet?

Skarlet : I cannot resist

(Y/N) : Not gonna lie, you do look good in red

Skarlet : I am flattered, Psychic

(Y/N) : Baby, I can give you more than flattery

(Y/N) : Keep your boyfriend in check, Blade

Sonya : Keep your ego in check, deafie

(Y/N) : You did not just call me that

Sonya : Stay away from my daughter, (Y/N)

(Y/N) : She’s the one glued to me, moron

Sonya : I don’t know what you just said but I’m gonna kick your ass anyway