#like sir forget your punching bag im right here

[saninthebuilding]

think i'm starting to understand the aggressive fangirling behaviour...

like sIR RESPECTFULLY RUN ME TF OVER WHAT-

[n1k1tty]

kiss me ! part 2

“hawaii!” niki yells, throwing as fist in the air as he enters the van “riki, it’s 3am in the morning, please shut up” jay retorts, going back to sleep as he leans on the window

as if it was almost planned, you and jake sat beside each other at the furthest seat. it was complicated, you didn’t know if you were comfortable or not, you felt tense, afraid of jake’s teasing if you touch him even the slightest. yet you also didn’t want to leave your seat.

you let out a huff, trying to find a position where you could comfortably sleep in. you were spooked at the sudden hand that leans your head on their shoulders “you can sleep on my shoulders, it’s alright” jake chuckles, already drifting to sleep the second after he did that “thanks” you mumble, easing into his warmth.

you laugh a little at his aching figure “this is funny to you? after i’ve been so kind to let you sleep on my shoulder?” he pouts “i deserve a long massage during our flight” he jokes, continuing to carry your bags.

dumbfounded by the fact that you stayed with him, giving him a glance filled with guilt “y/n seriously, i’m fine. it’ll go away sooner or later” he reassures you, his heart exploding at the sight of you with glimmering eyes, feeling the guilt you expressed them with.

“what do you wanna eat for breakfast?” you mumble, taking the luggage cart from his grasp. he laughs at your attempt to make him feel better “sorry? didnt quite hear that well” he teases, making you give him a glare, almost forgetting that he was ‘injured’ you raise your hand to almost give him a punch “good thing you’re hurting or i would’ve punched your ass back to australia” you roll your eyes “you heard what i said!” eyebrows frowning as you look away “alright alright, i’m fine with coffee really—” he lets out a breathy chuckle, dragging his feet as he follows you around “—nonsense! breakfast is important. don’t give me that type of bullshit sim” you cut him off, stopping by a little restaurant as you tell the other members to go ahead “im getting you pancakes. better finish it or you’re not living to see another day”

he laughs “this is quite a unique way to care for someone don’t you think” you roll your eyes "eat the damn pancakes sim jaeyun"

"yas ma'am"

--

after everyone had met up, you all started finding your seats. you were bewildered, somehow, because now you found yourself wanting to switch seats with sunghoon for obvious reasons. but of course, you --again, didn't have the guts to do so.

a few hours into the flight and a few glances from jake here and there, you received a message

jake :):

hey pretty girl, do me a favour and go to the washroom behind you

you:

and why exactly?

jake :):

no questions asked. i just miss you ;)

you swore you wanted to jump off the plane. pretty girl?! he misses me?!. you feel the heat creeping up in your face as you asked jungwon "hey, could you get up of a sec. i gotta go to the washroom" you whisper, mumbling a small 'thank you' before you walked to the washroom.

you felt a hand pull you "hey" he giggles, arms wrapped around your waist "you scared me! i thought i was getting abducted" you slap his shoulder. although you would be lying if you said you didn't want to just grab him and kiss him right at this moment.

he looked so good with his button up shirt, showing off his collar bones, neck wearing the beaded necklace you made for him during the summer and your birthstone necklace. his hair was messy, and you couldn't deny how hot he looked with his glasses on.

"you should consider buttoning up" you hesitantly say, looking anywhere but his eyes. of course he catches on to your intentions, but he felt like pissing you off "why? i'm showing off your necklace" he giggles "i even bought your birthstone" he grabs the necklace with his thumb, making you roll your eyes as you cross your arms, making sim jaeyun giggle.

he places his hand under your chin, finally letting you looking at him "switch seats with sunghoon please. i don't think i like the sight of you sleeping on jungwon's shoulders" now it was your time to piss him off.

"why?" you pout, "his shoulders are so comfortable, and we don't want your shoulders aching again now do we?" you give him a slight smile, well it wasn't like you weren't planning to switch with sunghoon way before the flight even started anyway.

jake rolls his eyes "that leaves you no choice--"

"can y'all hurry up? i'll switch with you y/n gosh! just let me pee!" sunghoon bangs on the door, making jake laugh "well that was easy"

--

oh how you regret changing seats.

because now you get to fully witness the flight attendants obviously flirting with him.

"good morning sir" she annoyingly giggles, biting her lip as she leans in way too close. jake leans back, letting out a small laugh out of politeness "hi, yeah i'd like..." he orders his food while you glare at the girl who's been displeasingly close to him "what can i get for you ma'am?"

"oh my girlfriend would like the same thing" jake interrupts, giving you a sly wink after placing his hand on top of yours. you let out a small scoff after seeing the disappointed look on the girl as she hands you the food. your skips a beat. girlfriend? you thought

now he was starting to piss you off. he was doing everything but ask you out. and with every ounce of pride you had in your soul, you hated to admit that you were starting to get really impatient. were you not obvious about your feelings? was the handmade necklace and the concern you have for him not obvious enough?

"ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Hawaii" the pilot announces, after you got your hand carry, you didn't even bother waiting for jake. immediately walking out of the plane, causing him to tilt his head out of confusion.

he didn't get a chance to talk to you, i mean, how could he when you would immediately start walking away from him whenever he tried to walk towards you.

as you sat beside jay in the tour bus, he gives you a weird look "why are you here" you give him a lost look "can i not...?" that's when he knew something happened between you and jake "y/n if this is because of jake--" you place your hand on his mouth, leaning way too close. but luck wasn't on your side today, because jake saw.

"shut up please! and yes! it is about him. so please spare me and let me sit here for the meantime" jay chuckles, "jake's going to kill me for this" he mumbles, leaning back to the chair "what?"

"nothing" he gives you a grin

--

after you guys arrived to jay's beach house you immediately grab your bag before jake could help you

"alright riki and sunoo are sharing a room, jungwon and heeseung are sharing, and...." jay looks at you, sunghoon and jake, not knowing what to do "you three figure it out. i'm just letting you know one gets to have their own room" jay starts to head to his own room, shrugging his shoulders as he walks past you with widened eyes.

"we already know what's about to happen. i'm getting my own room-"

"no!" you yell

"yes!" jake yells in unison,

"well......" sunghoon stood there, waiting for the both of you to talk "well, i just think i should get the room since you know-- i'm a girl and-- you and jake are best friends so you should be roommates" you explain, giving sunghoon an awkward smile "yeah sure whatever- ow!" jake hits sunghoon in the arm "you idiot! take the goddamn room!" jake grits through his teeth "you know what y/n! i change my mind. i uh, i think im going to take the room"

"why?!" you whisper with a harsh tone. poor sunghoon "IM GOING TO JERK OFF OR SOMETHING I DON'T KNOW" he yells, although he regrets it after the maids give him a weird look "ayo what?" heeseung peaks through the door "nothing! i didn't mean that. just --ugh! i'm heading out" he grabs his luggage, stomping through the hallways as he walks to the room. leaving you with jake.

--

you were about to have a mental breakdown "jay! you're seriously not helping me at all!" you give him a shove "ow! you need to control your strength sometimes! and i'm sorry okay? i just panicked, and i think you and jake being roommates wouldn't be a mistake. it's better to fix your problems instead of just sweeping it under the rug. you can't avoid him forever y/n" he was right. and you knew that. but you couldn't bring yourself to tell jake what was bothering you. even the thought of it was embarrassing, because what if he wasn't even intending to date you at all?

you walk back to the room, hesitating whether you should open it or not. but after hearing no noise, you open the door "AH OH MY GOD SORRY--" there you saw a shirtless jake, hair wet and his glasses having a few drops of water from his hair. he grabs your hand before you could walk out again "y/n, please talk to me" he places his hands on both sides of your shoulders "did i do something wrong? whatever it is, i'm really sorry" he panics, slightly pouting at the silent treatment you gave him "jake i-"

"dinners ready!" riki barges in, freezing at the sight of you two "oh- hey! riki, let's go!" you grab his arm, walking towards the dining room "please don't mention it" you whisper, sitting in between riki and jay.

jake later follows, now in his grey shirt and the checkered pajamas he wore earlier, he gives you a small smile before sitting next to heeseung.

"so, sunghoon. did you have fun?" heeseung teases

"shut up!"

--

"this wasn't going as planned anymore!" jake groans, he was currently in jay's room, ranting his frustrations out while jay listened. when jake had heard about the trip to hawaii, he originally planned to confess when you guys went to the party, it's not like the party had already happened, but it was already tomorrow "i already apologized, yet she still wouldn't speak"

"do you even know why she's mad?" jay asked, leaning on the bad with his arms as he watched jake pacing around his room "...no?"

"jake sim you idiot"

it was 1 am in the morning and you finally finished playing games with riki and heeseung. you were hesitating to open the door once again. afraid of letting the incident happen once more. you knock lightly, hoping that he was there and you could finally make up

but before you could open the door, jake already opened it. immediately embracing you "please talk to me" he whispers gently in your ear. you couldn't help but burst out crying, causing him to panic, he caresses your hair "let's go for a walk yeah?" he grabs your wrist, his touch so gentle as if you were fragile.

he wipes your tears as you walk along the shore "i missed you. you know?" he holds your hand as you both drag your feet along the sand. you hit him on his shoulder "ow!"

"that's what you get!" you sniffle, looking at the reflection of the moon on the sea "what did i do?" he chuckles, searching for your eyes. he tilts his head when you don't respond "hello?"

"cause! you always flirt with me, calling me your girlfriend and hugging me! i hate it! i hate it because my heart always skips a beat every time and i always expect you to ask me out soon yet you never do!" you yell, your skin was glowing under the moonlight. jake was in awe the moment he saw your glistening eyes that had tears threatening to fall.

he had the sudden urge to kiss you and tell you how he felt.

and he did. because jake was a man who never doubted his feelings when it came to you.

he pulls you by the waist, causing you to let out a yelp. his lips touches yours, and it stayed like that for a while, to make up for the moments he wasted without you this whole vacation. you wrap your hands around his neck, playing with his hair

"can i be your boyfriend?" he cheekily says, his smile making you smile as well "suck my ass. sim jaeyun. yes, i'd love for you to be my boyfriend"

"i'd gladly suck your a--"

"sim jaeyun!"

--

[bonus bcs i haven't posted in a while]

it was the morning of the party, you were in jake's arms "finally you're awake! good morning!" he excitedly says, peppering you with kisses "the guys are in the pool so get changed" he informs you, smacking your ass as soon as you got up "getting too comfortable for our first day aren't we?" you tilt your head, giving him a smirk "can't help it" he send a wink your way.

as soon as you got out in your swimsuit, jake's mouth drops "do a little turn for me" he smirks, twirling you around as he hypes you up "holy shit! i'm so lucky aren't i" he checks you out, earning a smack from you "ow! alright but i'm not letting them check you out like that! wear my shirt"

(he didn't let you go from the jacuzzi after heeseung hyped you up lol)

--

[party]

you told jake to go ahead, wanting to surprise him with the dress you bought.

after arriving to the party jake almost dropped the drink he had in his hand after he saw you. he was smiling so hard when the little girl put a Lei (flower neck lace) on you. he felt so proud when the other men at the party look at you giving him a hug

"that's right, she's mine" he thought

after you walked to wards him he grabs you by the waist "you look so pretty in red" he says, hugging you tightly "is that so?" you ask, giving him a chaste kiss on the lips, making him all giddy

--

part 1

taglist: @zylenes @hwalllllllelujah @theskzvibe

HI GUYS :D. i will be posting the visuals for this fic so pls wait :)

[princecharmingwinks]

i cant believe you said you dont write for fandoms!! these are ending up AMAZING! have another fail date for you to make better: we went four-wheel driving over the dunes out bush, we took my car but he drove because he's done the route before. we were the second car in the convoy and because my car is a little smaller than the others it couldnt make it up the last dune! it nearly made it over before sliding back into the sand and ended up half buried! (1/2)

(2/2) the rest of the group had to drag and push us out with planks and chains etc while we were stuck inside because no way in hell i was opening the door to let the sand in! so three wheels in the sand, waiting on our rescue, irl it was a bit awkward but im hoping you'll rewrite a better ending <3

Awww concussed dragon, you are sooo sweet! Thank you! Your unique failed dates are great to work with. Alrighty, let's get into this one! So the pack got big in this one and while most don't have lines, I liked the idea of everyone being there (or almost for anyone I missed haha). I left some of the couple combos up to interpretation so feel free to ship at your leisure.

---

The pack, after much pestering from a certain human/spark, were finally going on their camping trip. The alpha had finally conceded when Stiles had shot him a pout and hopeful eyes. Derek had reluctantly agreed and ignored the snickering of his betas in the corner of the room.

On the morning of the trip, everyone was pairing up into groups of drivers and passengers so no one drove alone and there were less cars.

Derek and Stiles were the last members out of the rebuilt Hale House. Derek had been locking up and Stiles was finishing off some wards to ensure there were no unwanted visitors while they were away. He was still learning to harness his spark but small wards of protection were easy enough. Defensive magic was easier, offensive was another story.

Stiles threw his bag into the back of the jeep and glanced around.

"So, who's joining Roscoe and me?"

Erica snickered, "Derek."

"What?" Stiles and Derek snapped in unison. Well at least Stiles had a punctuation mark, Derek's not so much.

"I'm with Danny, Lydia and Jacks." Kira spoke up. "Scott, Malia, and Isaac are with Allison."

"I'm obviously with my boy." Erica jumped onto Boyd's back, who was used to his girlfriend's antics and easily caught her. "And Theo is meeting us there after picking up Liam from work. Everyone's paired up so that just leaves you two."

Stiles felt his heart flutter but managed to keep his voice even as he spoke, "Alright Alpha My Alpha, let's get going."

Derek didn't say a word as he slid into the passenger seat of the jeep. Everything would be fine.

Everything was not fine. Stiles was definitely going through a quarter life crisis at the realisation most of the pack were in couples. How did he not realise that? When had it become a prerequisite to start dating a pack member? And now it was just Stiles and the alpha. The alpha he had been in love with for years. Great...

"What's wrong?"

Stiles was pulled out of his internal panic by said alpha's soothing voice. Derek had softened over the years, showing care and concern for each member of the pack. He now bought scent-free nail polish for Erica (so the acid smell didn't upset all the were's noses), stocked Isaac's favourite gummybears and even hugged Kira willingly at her university graduation. Derek Hale was a softie.

"I'm fine, nothing wrong here, no sir." Stiles prattled. Even he heard the blatant lies without supernatural healing. He glanced to his side and was greeted by raised eyebrows.

"Ok, so I may have just realised how paired up everyone in the pack really is."

"Except us."

"Yeah," Stiles sighed. "Except us. Do you ever think about that? Like, why you haven't dated anyone since..." He trailed off. Derek didn't have the best track record for his love interests but he hadn't even been on a date for more than 3 years.

Derek looked out the window at the scenary, they were driving into the sand dune part of the journey, and for a moment Stiles thought he wasn't going to answer.

"I've been waiting."

Stiles blinked. Huh?

"For someone so smart, you're really clueless sometimes." Derek huffed, glancing back at Stiles.

"What have you been waiting for?" Stiles dared to ask. They had paused to allow Allison's four-wheel-drive to roll up the last sand dune, waiting for their turn. Roscoe would be the last time to make the climb.

"I thought it was my imagination at first but then you kept coming around and..."

It was Roscoe's turn now and Stiles slowly prepared for the final climb of the dune. He tried to keep focused on the task at hand, allowing Derek to speak his thoughts. You never rushed the alpha when he was being vulnerable.

"I know you kind of like me?" Derek voiced it as a question but all Stiles heard was sirens in his brain. Derek knew? Stiles' foot slid off the peddle and they immediately started rolling backwards, fast.

"Shit! Shit, shit shit." Stiles acted quickly but it wasn't enough. Roscoe descended the sand dune and sank, refusing to move. Sand on either side of them blocked the bottom of their doors. They were officially stuck.

Stiles rested his head on the steering wheel and slowed his breathing. There were multiple crises going on but most had solutions.

The others would work out they hadn't made the climb soon enough or Theo and Liam would find them on their way through. So either way, Roscoe being stuck wasn't a massive deal. The real dilemma was Stiles' outed feelings for Derek.

The same Derek that was eyeing Stiles with concern as he called Kira to request some assist. Stiles heard him hang up before the sound of a door handle being jiggled. He snapped his head up.

"Whoa there sourwolf, there is to be no sand storm in this car, thankyouverymuch." He reached out and tugged the alpha's hand away from the door.

"I figured me getting out and pushing was the preferred option to sitting here with you in a state of panic at my assumption."

Stiles pulled his hand back. "What?"

"Look, we can just forget I ever said anything, alright? I get I'm not the most desirable crush to have. It's probably just familiarity and your sense of loyalty that's fueled your scent around me anyway. Don't worry about it."

Stiles shook his head, "Oh no you don't. You opened that can of worms and I'm no coward." The spark met Derek's gaze. Had he been planning on ignoring his feelings for the alpha? Sure. But was he going to run away from a moment like this? Nope. Stiles Stilinski was a lot of things but after running with wolves and other supernaturals for most of his life, he knew when he needed to tackle something head on.

"Now, before you go down your rabbit hole of I'm-not-good-enough crazy talk, I've got something to say."

Derek nodded like the soft alpha he was and turned to face Stiles more fully.

"You, Derek Alexander Hale, are amazing. A little on the martyr side but that's because you are so protective of your pack. I'd be crazy to not fall in love with you. That's right, love not like. I've been in love with you for years but how was a kid like me going to catch the alpha's eye? I didn't want to ruin our friendship. This," He gestured between them. "This is important to me. I don't want to ruin it."

Derek released a sigh of relief? Stiles couldn't read his eyebrows which was disappointing when he was the most expert at interpreting the alpha's facial expressions.

Then Derek was darting forward and claiming Stiles' lips in a searing kiss. Stiles went with it, almost unbelieving that any of this was happening.

Derek eventually pulled back and rested his forehead against Stiles'.

"Worth the wait." The alpha whispered, grinning, bunny teeth all on display.

"Two way street here. You could've said something too. How long have you liked me?"

Derek blushed and it was only because they were so close that Stiles saw the pink of his cheeks and ears.

"I've always liked you, even if I didn't always show it. But love? I think I've loved you since you woke me up on an elevator floor by punching me. You could have left without me but you didn't."

Stiles pouted, "Since then?"

Derek raised an eyebrow, "What's wrong?"

Stiles pushed Derek back and clumsily crawled across the gear stick to straddle the alpha's lap.

"We could have been having the best sex of my life for years, Derek! Years! We've got a lot of making up to do." Stiles dove in to kiss Derek this time. The alpha happily drew Stiles in closer, curling his arms around the spark's slim waist.

A knock on the window, interrupted their make-out session. Boyd's face appeared with judging eyebrows to rival Derek's.

"Heard you needed a hand." Boyd spoke loudly with a smirk as Derek's hand moved away from Stiles' ass to rest safely on his back.

"What's Erica doing?" Stiles asked, leaning over Derek to squint at the blonde chatting wildly on the phone. Derek focused his hearing.

"Turns out I'm not the only one who was waiting." Derek grinned, "And everyone apparently owes Lydia money."

They did eventually get Roscoe out of the sand dune thanks to the advantages of going camping with multiple supernatural creatures. By the time everyone was settled in the camp and Erica had informed Theo and Liam on the events of the day, Lydia was a very rich woman.

Stiles couldn't complain though. Not when the alpha was snuggled between his legs as Stiles sat on the log and Derek roasted them marshmallows. Apparently no one trusted Stiles near an open flame following the incident with that vampire clan. Stiles combed his fingers through Derek's hair and looked around at the pack. This camping trip was the best idea ever.

--

Ok so I must confess I do not camp like...ever and have no idea how four-wheel-driving works so please forgive any major errors in that department. I tweaked things a bit from your prompt sorry. I just couldn't imagine Stiles letting anyone else drive Roscoe. Hope you enjoyed! Thanks for popping in!

[albino-whumpee]

The redhead

Ok, so. This story has been cooking on my head for such a long time now and Im gonna be clear with you: I´m aware this first installment and maybe the next won´t be of many people´s liking, so if you don´t like seeing the whumping of minors, I advice you to stay away from this series.

There won´t be any noncon here, but there will be lots of other hurt/comfort tropes and many creepy whumping from multiple whumpers to a pair of whumpees, one adult and one a minor.

I´m also gonna say this is the backstory of one of Albus´s story characters.

I remember sending you an ask @deluxewhump about some ideas for this story and you wanted to be tagged, But, I can´t find them and well. Wanted to give a heads up of what it could contain.

Taglist: @whumptywhumpdump @grizzlie70

CW// Pet whump, whumping of a minor, modern slavery, human trafficking, collars, dehumanization, it as a pronoun, implied death, creepy whumper, conditioning, captivity whump and angst. (ask to tag if I missed something)

House looked like an ordinary orphanage from outside. It had big halls with bunk beds and slim metal closets next to them. Shoes tossed under the beds along with any trinket the children wanted to hide from curious or severe eyes. Beds neatly made early and kids off to the classes on other rooms. There was no need for them to learn to read or write however, so there were no books that weren’t for coloring.

Many of the lessons were taken outside, along buckets and brooms they swiped dutifully, or inside kitchens learning to identify tools and vegetables and memorizing the measurements needed of each ingredient on what recipe. Children did everything under the scrutinizing eyes of teachers who were so, so difficult to appease, but yet again, tried hard to earn their comfort and approval.

So they could graduate and leave.

The very best left early and the not so good would leave bordering their 12. There were only a few that left on their mid teens, and so, the ginger kid wearing the sandy jumper of House’s uniform, coloring with a green crayon the feathers of a toucan, had decided he didnt wanna be like that a long time ago.

He would graduate and leave house and go with a loving family that would take him, that would really love him, just like the teachers told them they would sometime soon.

It was his dream. As it was every child´s wish in House. So, he did as he was told. He cast his big green eyes down when talked to, kept quiet until he was spoken to, paid attention to class and did his tasks before the day ended. He took all the punishments while training, too. Even if he tried to keep it to a minimum, there would always be something that pissed the Teachers off.

For example, dumping the trash. Having to go to the back of the one store building, close to the one beyond the thick brick wall, with its narrow barred windows -just like House´s windows were- from where phantasmagoric sobbing and pained screaming would come through, was the most loathed chore at House. Whenever he was on duty, the little boy shook like a leaf with the heavy plastic bags dragging behind, before throwing them and run back to the building.

One time, the kid saw a pair of thin hands wrapping around the window bars and saw a woman peeking from it, hands shaking with the effort when she panted a wheezy, “help me”

The little boy had never screamed so hard in his short life.

The teachers had been mad at him, but not enough for a crate training reinforcement. He was relieved, to a point, when they punished him to clean the bathrooms alone for a week instead.

As he swiped the floor in the middle of the night, he promised himself he would get out soon. Sooner than his brothers and sisters who wouldn´t dare to defend him, saying outloud how scary the other building was and how some of them couldn´t sleep because they heard the people trapped there scream and beg all night long.

Of course they wouldn’t. Excepting a few who unknowingly shared blood, nobody shared anything but the wish to get out. If you tried to fight the Teachers, it would just delay it further. Every kid knew not to get on their bad side. It was also part of their training to see them as their preliminary Masters. A drill, of how it would be once out.

So when one finally received their collar and graduated to go to the family who had chose them, only the brave ones would wave goodbye. Jealousy taking the better of some, meanwhile others would only feel fear.

He wouldnt be like that either.

The brother he had gotten the most close to, the one who actually did protect him from the other kids bullying, had graduated months ago. Taller than normal for any kid from House -the little boy had heard the teachers say once- the brown kid and black curls with a smile sitting on his face at all times, had been his best friend.

They didn’t have names and they weren´t given one until they graduated. The Teachers used nicknames like “ginger” or “mole” or “mousy”, but that hadn´t stopped them from calling each other a secret name. A name they used only for each other and secretly, considered their true names.

“Are you happy for me, Robin? That I will finally go” Hawk asked him once, while playing on a sunday. The Kid´s free day to go anywhere they wished inside the estate´s perimeter. Close to the brick fence, a river flowed through iron bars, not letting anyone in or out.

Robin shook his head, red hair bouncing at the motion. Hawk giggled with that weightless sound, throwing away the stick on his hand they had used to play as if they were two princes in duel a few minutes earlier.

Robin stopped walking when Hawk put his hand over the wall, looking at it with conflict on his face.

“I heard the Teachers say my new Master will take me over seas” Hawk admitted. Robin didn´t understand the reason for such a long face. That only meant he would see the sea! Wasn´t that cool enough? However, the small kid kept listening. “They said he specifically requested me. But…” he punched the wall suddenly, making Robin jump in reflex “They said because I was problematic, I would be getting extra training in something called WRU”

Robin didn’t know what WRU was yet. They barely knew what was beyond the brick walls surrounding House, but it couldn’t be much worse than House, could it?

“I´m sorry. You always ended up on fights because of me…” Robin started clenching the stick on his hands tight as Hawk turned to him.

“C´mon. We´ve been over this, Birdie. It´s not your fault” he said, watching the small readhead lift his glassy eyes up “Besides, you know what to do now if they pick on you, right?”

“But I´m not as strong as you!” The boy argued before feeling the big hand of his brother ruffling his hair.

“Maybe just not yet” he said with that innate warmth of him. Like the times the other kids gathered around him late at night, hearing him talk about what one of the Teachers, one that was so close and nice to him, they had thought he would take Hawk home, had taught him after class. About all the different animals that existed, about science, about the world outside of the thick walls.

It dawned on him then, no kid would have those stories anymore, nor would he laugh first thing in the morning seeing the nest his hair was.

The child jumped to hug the older boy at the waist. “But, but, even if you go, you won’t forget us, right? If I graduate soon and our Masters meet, even if I´m already an adult, you will recognize me right?” Robin asked him, feeling the other boy’s fingers card through his short hair before squeezing him tight.

“I promise I won’t, Robin”

“I will keep the name you gave me” Robin said urgently, clenching hard so Hawk wouldn’t let go just yet. Hawk sighed quietly before burying his face on the boy’s shoulder.

“They’re ours”

“Ours alone” Robin finished.

The next day, Hawk’s new Master came for him in a black suburban with polarized windows and a few scary looking men by his side. Hawk bowed to him before the teacher ordered him to, as a perfect obedient Pet from House did before graduating. The other boys were lined up in their Sandy uniform, maybe in hopes the man would take another boy or girl, but he was completely entranced by Hawk’s face. He had lifted his chin to have a better look at it and then ruffled his hair with a big smile.

Then, the man gently buckled the new collar around Hawk´s neck, clipping the leather leash with the outmost gentleness. The man only tugged on it to test if the boy would walk forward, and when he did, he passed his hand through his hair.

Robin couldn’t hear it, but Hawk glowed at the praise his new Master gave him before giving the Teachers the ceremonial thick envelope. While the transaction happened, Hawk sneaked a look back at Robin and smiled.

“Bye, Robin” he mouthed, before feeling a pull from his neck that told him to follow his Master to the black van.

Right before the car trunk’s door closed, Robin waved goodbye with tears in his eyes the other kids didn’t stop teasing him about for weeks.

Four months after Hawk’s graduation, a few weeks after his twelfth birthday, Robin was standing in front of the building again. Now, it was his turn to graduate. His new Master was an older man that came out from a car you could smell the stench of gasoline from miles away.

“Skip the formalities. Where is it?” The man asked one of the Teachers standing next to him after the boy bowed. The woman in white clothes simply pushed him forward. Robin looked down at his shoes, so old looking against the shiny, cared for shoes of his would-be Master. The man wasn’t gentle when he fisted on the ginger’s head and forcefully lifted his face for him to see. He was better trained than to let out the pained groan bobbling up on his chest. The man hummed, pleased with his silence. “Yeah. You will do. How much for it?” The man said letting him go and quickly taking out the thick envelope from his jacket.

“I see you didn’t bring your own equipment for your new Pet, Sir. Would you want me to add the collar and leash to the sum?” The Teacher asked to the man, who grunted, too annoyed, like it was a waste of his time to ask.

“Yeah, sure, whatever” the man said without looking at Robin “It´s not for me anyways”

The small boy gripped on his uniform tight. The distress of not knowing how his real owner looked like suddenly settling in with fear when suddenly his not-Master asked the Teacher for a transport crate.

“Of course, sir. We will prepare him right away” the woman said with a wide grin as two other teachers pushed Robin to the garage. The boy´s heart leaped, but he gulped down the fear and allowed himself to get dragged. As he walked through the mocking and confused stares of the other children, he heard the woman continue to speak “If you would be so kind to accompany us to the office so we take the information needed for his shipping”

The man cursed under his breath, “Make it quick. Hearst is already pissed at me for messing up his pair”

Robin didn´t hear her reply.

The next thing the boy knew was that he had wrapped around his neck the price leather collar- the one the Teachers would only put on when they had earned a people´s meal from good results on training- with a large paper tag on it. He couldn´t know it said the name and address of his new Master, but he was static as he crawled into the plastic crate with the blue blanket on the corner he quickly wrapped around himself as he was rolled to the man´s stinky car. Maybe, if he was lucky, he would be able to catch a sight from the sea. Or maybe, from the sky above, if they went on a plane.

The car´s doors closed and he was drived out of House´s property, through the bricked fence and so, as his world, that had been confined to the same three square kilometers, suddenly grew infinitely big, filled with infinite things to see.

The man´s laughter on the driver´s seat abruptly stopped his awe.

“Enjoying the view, Pet?”

“Y-Yes, sir. Very much, thank you” Robin quickly replied.

“Well, you better burn the image to your memory, because with Hearst, you won´t be seeing anything but a kitchen and dirty restrooms” the man laughed.

“Yes, sir!” Robin said before looking out through the bars on his crate. To catch the green land and the sea expanding beyond. The man rasped his throat, muttering something under his breath.

Although he could hear him say “That´s why you wanted him young?” Robin didn´t understand and put his whole mind into catching every last detail he could get of outside.

Robin held to the image of the small houses with red ceilings surrounded by a vast blanket of green even as he was processed to go back on the cargo at the airport. They took him out of his crate to check the tag hanging from his collar and stick some papers into his uniform before pushing him back inside.

Two workers in blue jumpers, loaded him with the rest of the pets. There were some cute dogs Robin had never seen but in his coloring books and even some older Pets with the same tags hanging from their necks. All of them, including him, were wrapped around a fuzzy blanket inside their crates.

Robin was dissapointed when he found out there were no windows inside the cargo, but the feeling of being lifted off the ground, of flying, even if he slammed himself against the metal door of his cage, was completely worth it.

During the long ride, he wondered if Hawk had gone on an airplane too. What he would´ve said of that weightless feeling as he curled tighter into his blankets. The sound of paper getting scrunched was muffled with the engine and the other pets conversations between them, but Robin closed his eyes and hoped, prayed, his new Master´s family allowed him to see even once more, the world he had dreamed of seeing.

And if his wildest dreams as he was rolled off the plane, abruptly awake when his cage was thrown around and rolled by Not-Master outside where it snowed, he hoped he could see Hawk once more.

“That´s our new addition, Charles?” a man´s voice said as he stopped rolling. They seemed to be on the parking lot now. Next to a black shiny car.

“It was a nightmare, but told you I would get a replacement for Shirley. It even has red hair” The man said patting the plastic cage´s ceiling.

The man didn´t reply immediately, but Robin had crawled slightly closer to the door, to catch some of the man´s incredule face.

The man’s low, almost amused, laughter hit him like a soft salty breeze, warm and gentle. “Well, let´s see Isaac’s new partner, Let´s see what you got us” the man said before he knelt before Robin´s crate.

The wished he could say his Master had looked kind, gentle even, that first time they locked eyes. But in reality, Robin couldn’t help but think his new Master’s eyes were so much like a cat’s. A pair of narrow, clever honey colored eyes stared at his wide greens for a moment, before he copened the door and pulled him out with a swift pull on his arm. Robin´s face scrunched at his Master´s grip, cracking a smile on the man´s as he let go “How old are you, boy?” The man asked him.

He bowed instinctively before answering, “Twelve, Sir, Master”

“I see” The man´s smile hung on his face as he said “Not old enough to be on the front then” His new Master then turned to the man “Thanks for fetching me a new one. The kids are very sad without Shirley but the worst must be Isaac. He just refuses to work now”

The man grunted as he saw Hearst open the trunk of his car. “I already apologized, Will”

“What´s one more “I´m sorry, Mr. Hearst”? My slave hasn´t even eaten because of what you did to his partner” he said before turning back on Robin, expecting “Do I have to put you in myself, boy? C´mon, up you go” he said snapping his fingers in front of his face. Robin´s body moved before he was aware he had crawled inside, then laid down on his side as the man put his hand back on the door  “Watch your head” he said before closing it, letting Robin in complete darkness.

It took a moment of hearing only his breathing to for him to finally sense the car moving. He was with his Master now… but he was shaking like a leaf. He didn´t stopped shaking, knowing deep on his bones, this Master would be the severe type.

It wouldn´t take him long to know he was right.

[ajokeformur-ray]

✨ Unfiltered Joker thoughts ✨

I watched Joker with a bunch of lovely clowns on my Discord and while they werewolf’d in the chat, I typed out my thoughts here as they came to me. These are unedited, unfiltered, and exactly as they were in my head. I don’t know who’d be interested in this but 🤷‍♀️ who doesn’t love unfiltered thoughts about our man? NSFW ahead in places, lmao and some self-ship elements because it’s always on my mind.

There are Controversial Things within, I’m sure - be nice about it if you wanna comment, or unfollow/block etc. if it bothers you I won’t take it personally. I will take it personally if I’m sent a rude message, though. Fair warning. You curate your own online experience so scroll past silently if you gotta!🥰🥰🥰🥰

Tagging @arthurflecc @jokerownsmysoul @daincrediblegg @sweet-nothings04 bc they were in the chat and missed me there!! 

 Word count: 4, 597.

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJO -

*Presses play*

OMG THERE HE IS BABYYYYYYYY ~ 

Ugh that white shirt... 🥵

“paint me like one of your french girls” 👀

oh, honey, no. 

Don’t force yourself to smile, my love, it’s okay. you can be hurting.

sweet angel who can do no wrong asdfghjkl

wanna kiss that tear away...

CARNIVALCARNIVAL CARNIVAL *STARTS SWAYING IN MY SEAT*

jaunty piano to juxtapose his shitty mood

you spin me right round, baby, right round...

ohhh, baby 🥺🥺🥺

someone’s honky lmaoooooo ~ 

that cello

Ohhhh, darling man.... i’m so sorry. I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry

WOOPS CRYINGGGG ~

sweet angel love still tryna be funy with the flower squirting...

what else will squirt tonight???👀

ohhh, darling. deep breaths baby. it’s okay. you’re okay.

CRYINGGGGG

ohhhh baby boyyyy....

legit just cooed aloud

oh angel <3 

“is it just me or is it getting crazier out there?”

it is my love... it is. 

let me sit on your lap and still the shaking of your legs

ohhhh my love. you’re okay. just breathe.

Dr. Kane was doing her best but you’re beyond what she can handle

you deserve better, sweetheart.

my love, my life.

I JUMPED WHEN HE HIT HIS HEAD IN ARKHAM

“who knows?”

yeah me too, my love. me too. 

“i just dont wanna feel so bad anymore”

oh baby.

i know, my love. i wish i could hold your hand and stroke your hair and kiss your cheeks 🥺🥺🥺

had a shitty day but wants to comfort a child on the bus. thats my manssss ~ <3 <3 <3 

okay but his peekaboo makes me giggle please do that to me when im sad

“‘cuse you bitch?”

the greasepaint still on his face is endearing omg 

GIVE HIM BACK HIS CARD OR IMMA RIOTTTT

CRYINGGGGG 

ohhhh baby. no. deep breaths. i’m here, my love. not going anywhere

those fucking steps

me too, darling. i feel your exhaustion like it’s my own and i long to take it from you without changing a single thing about you.

my love, my life

the weariness of an unchanged routine is a paralysing one

wanna rub cream on your bruises

“yeah, mum” so soft im cry

“eat. you need to eat” i hear you in my head when i wanna skip meals and it helps me.

“oh yeah? who do you talk to?” YES SASS HER

“yay murray” ohhhhh angel you’re so cute I’m cry 🥺

murray you wankstain - old and crusty 🤮🤢🤮🤢

arthur’s laugh in his daydream 🥺🥺

“i love you murray” // “you’re awful murray” baby noooooo

“theres something special about you arthur” the only real thing murrat ever fuckin said AND IT WASNT EVEN A REAL THING IT WAS IN HIS HEAD

“I TAKE GOOD CARE OF MY MOTHER” YEEEES BABY YOU DO! SO PROUD OF YOU!!!

just wantin recognition in your daydreams bc you dont get it in your real life

YOU SWEET THING

HIS SWEET SMILE AND THE CELLO OH BABY 🥺😭

YOUR BACK 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

shoes are too tight so you gotta stretch em 

can you stretch me too???👀🥵💦🔥

“chuckletown” RANDALLS LEGACY AND WE TURNED IT INTO SMTHN LOVING AND NOT SARKY LIKE HE INTENDED LMAO FUCK YOU RANDALL YOU PIECE OF SHIIIIIIIIT

arthur’s hair in the sun omg like a halo

randall fuck off fucking fuck off go aWAY LEAVE MY ARTHUR ALONE

you asswipe

arthurs shy and nervous lil giggle omg baby say no give the gun back its not well intended 

“my boy”  AHA LMAO HE DOES PAY YOU BACK BUT NOT HOW YOU EXPECT LMAOOOO YOU GET WHAT YOU DESERVE

THOSE CURLS

arthur’s sweet little lilting voice in front of his boss omggggg ~ 

HOYYYYYYT 

his logic makes no sense wtffffff ~ 

RETAIL SMILE LMAO THATS A MOOD 

brewing insanity..... 

POUND ME LIKE THOSE TRASH BAGS

RUIN ME AND THEN REBUILD ME IN YOUR IMAGE 

those mf stairs again

it’s the same old team since 1916... in your head, in your head...

never in my LIFE have i been aroused by a FOOT

lmao only Arthur istg that man is the exception to my every rule

Gigi is so CUTE 🥺

THAT SMIRK SIR CAN YOU NOT

“hey” omggg look at you tryna connect ugh so proud of youuu ~ 

the moon is a silver dollar... 

THOSE CURLS

THOSE BARE FEET

THAT SOFT VOICE

ARTHURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR 

frances conroy is a goddess omg i love herrrr ~ 

espesh on ahs she’s a queen

but i digress lmao wrong fandom

“dont you have to be funny to be a comedian”

FUCK OFF PENNY 

FUCK RIGHT OFF THEN FUCK OFF SOME MORE PLEASE

slap that bass.... 

FINGERSSS ON THE GUN ASDFGHJ PUT THEM ON ME INSTEADDDD

zoom zoom the world is in a mess

LMAO YEP

“psh” omg you sweet angel asdfghjk

THAT EYEBROW RAISE ASDFGHJK SASSY KINGGGGG

GET ITTTTTT

UGH THAT BODY WANNA COVER IT IN MARKS OF LOVE TO REPLACE THE VIOLENT MARKS

ARTHUR @ HIMSELF “YOURE A GOOD DANCER // I KNOW”

omggggg sweet clumsy babyyyy

lmaooo “old war movie” do you tell penny that when we get caught having sex on the sofa????

arthur honey following sophie isn’t.... the best way to get her attention asdfghjk 

someone needs to teach you social interactions... 

I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTTTTTE

that student/teacher roleplay comedian at pogos makes no sense to me???? i dont get his jokes at all

lmao bad comediannnnnn

arthur’s cute lil mistimed giggles ksksksksk 

wanna kiss your cheeks every timmmme 

you’re working so hard to achieve your goals im so so proud of you

ambidextroussss ~ (just like me omg we’re perfect for each otherrrrr)

“people expect you to behave as if you dont” YOU INTELLIGENT LIL SHIT OMG I LOVE YOU AND YOUR MIND

you know its a daydream if arthurs wearing a shirt at home 

his shy “yeah” omggggg ~ angelllll 

“i have a gun i can come by tomorrow” LMAOOOOOOOO 

“youre so funny arthur” YES HE IS DREAM!SOPHIE

CARNIVAL CARNIVAL CARNIVAL

I ACTUALLY STOMP MY FEET HERE BC IM HAPPY FOR THE TIME HES ON SCREEN SWEET CLOWN 

THE ONLY ONE IM NOT AFRAID OF

HES SO SO HAPPY OMGGG

BABY BOYYYY IN HIS ELEMENT

SAD THO BC KIDS ARE TERMINALLY ILL 

bestest party clownnnn 

“I love this job” oh baby 🥺🥺

aaaaaaaaand now the betrayal from randall lmao fuck that dude

NO BB YOUR FOREHEAD NO SMASHY GLASSY

LMAO THE FUCK ERIKA???

dudes 35 not a kid 

throwing greasy chips into a girl’s hair isn’t how to flirt my dude lmao you’re gross??? 

ew

EW EW EW WIGGLE YOUR CHIPS ELSEWHERE

ohhhh arthur, honey no omg breathe it’s okay

you wanna help but you dont know how

you sweet thing 

send in the clowwwwwwwwwwwwwwns ~ 

IM CRYINGGGGG

“they couldnt carry a tune to save their lives”

JOEKR ITS NOT YOUR TIME YET GO AWAYYYY

lmao jokes stay you know im lost without you 

HOW CAN YOUR HAIR LOOK SO GOOD AFTER BEING UNDER A WIG ALL DAY ?????

carnival with arthur’s hair is just 👌👌👌👌

WHERES HIS CARDDDDD 

nooooooo omg baby no omg i wish i could take all those punches for you

i’d take it all in a heartbeat to save you

gritting his teeth not taking in anymore

YES BABY GET EEEEEEM

YES YES YES YES STAND UP FOR YOURSELF SO PROUD OF YOU

first 2 self defence, 3rd one unsure lmao but fuck it 

no PUT THE GUN AWAY FROM YOUR FACE BABY ITS OKAY DONT FORGET YOUR BAG OR YOUR WIG ITS EVIDENCE

KILL THE 3RD COVER YOUR TRACKS

GOOD BOYYYYYY

carnival with blood on face = killing your insecurities

8 bullets from a 6 chamber????? mm-hm lmao i know @daincrediblegg wrote a thing on this once lmao bestest Egg is smart and i love her muchly 🥰🥰🥰🥰

run baby run, dont ever look backkk... (check yes juliet)

BATHROOM SCENE BATHROOM SCENE BATHROOM SCENE

fuck me against that dirty counter

joker’s waking uuuuuuuup....

that cello though unffff 👌

got me clenchinnnnn you fluidddd ~ 

and in his eyes, all the sadness of the world. those pleading eyes that both threaten and adore (phantom of the opera)

my brain is 90% song lyrics 

hes so graceful and ethereal so full of pain and of love and of adventure and worth and need and yearning

my sweet boy

my wonderful angel

my fallen angel

T POSEEEEE

DAYDREAM KISSSSS

ugh push me against the wall and shove your hand down my panties and take whats yours 

please and thanks

so confident

so smooth

so sure

unf

take me angel im all yours 

and my name is carnival

SASSY BOYYYYY

I SAY BOY BUT YOURE A MAN LMAO 

YESSSSSS TELL THEMMMMMMMM 

LMAOOOOOO RANDALL SEEMS LEGIT CONFUSED PFFFT

TOUGH SHIIIIIIIT

LMAOOO PUNCH OUT

BUSTING A LUNNGGGGG

HE DOESNT KNOW HIS OWN STRENGTH

OR HIS OWN LIMITS

“DONT SMILE”

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

nothin worse than being told to smile when you really wanna bare your teeth and let rip

aka me every fuckin minute of my life 

SHUSH ME SHUSH ME SHUSH ME

ILL CRY BUT DO IT

LMAOOOOO CHOKE ME WITH THOSE BICEPS 

ILL GO OUT DOIN WHAT I LOVE

YOUUUUUUU 

“gotham’s lost its way” ok trump

“thats not funny” SHUT UP PENNY YES IT IS

STOP SMOTHERING ARTHUR LET HIM BE FREE

“nobody ever saw me. even i didnt know if i really existed”

and

“you dont listen do you”

BOTH ARE MOODS

i feel them so hard

hes so sure of himself in this session

so angry and done and weary

“people are starting to notice” ALMOST A YEAR OF YOU BEING NOTICED

that green jumper omggg 

good luck getting me out of it pfffft 

“erika have you seen my - oh, there it is. never mind.”

want it back???? payment is kissessss

EW SEXIST COMEDIAN

arthur honey stop primping youre perfect <3 <3 <3 

im so so proud of youuuuu

COLLARBONEEEEEES

OMG HE STUMBLES UP THE STEPS DARLINGGG

I wish i could hold your hand while youre on stage and comfort you while you deliver your jokes

just breathe, darling. it’s okay. i’m here, i promise. <3 

every time you gag on your laughter my heart clenches

CRYINGGGGG

oh, my love, it’s okay. just breathe. dont fight it. dont fight yourself 

you’re so good at imitating your ma pfffft 

lmaoooo you’re so funny arthur 

WOO BOI DONT FLASH YOUR PORN PAGES AT THE AUDIENCE 

givin me ideas.... 

SMILE THOUGH YOUR HEART IS ACHING

SMILE EVEN THOUGH IT’S BREAKING 

WHEN THERE ARE CLOUDS IN THE SKY

YOU’LL GET BY

SMILE THROUGH YOUR FEAR AND SORROW

SMILE

AND MAYBE TOMORROW

YOULL SEE THE SUN COME SHINING THROUGH

arthur is my sunshine

EXCUSE ME HEART EYES OMGGGG

ME AND ARTHUR HEART EYESING AT EACH OTHER PFFFFFT 

gonna put people off their food doin that 

thats life

arthur’s imitations and those soft curls and the dancing and the - 

erika.exe has stopped working 

“come on dance with me”

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

i prefer the horizontal dance myself...

“big date”

“deliver the letter”

NARCISSISM 

ARTHUR YOU DESERVE BETTERRRRRRRRRR

IS IT BAD HIS EYEBROWS TURN ME ON?? SO THICK AND DARK AND STRONG I - 

and those eyes

ugh fuck meeee ~ 

yes thats an invitation

penny “needs care” but her handwriting is that neat???? yeah fuck off 

sorry i dont buy it

she was grooming him i think into some kinda husband role and its fucking gross as fuck she was abusing him and he just wanted her gone 

CUTE LIL NOSTRIL FLARES BC SAD AND ANGRY

OMG

his quiet anger scares me but i admire how he calmed down so fast

angry penguinnnnn

HE CARRIES HIS CLOWN NOSE AROUND IN HIS POCKET

CUUUUUUUTE

the similar clothing colours of arthur and bruce is v def intentional 

in another life, arthur....

i’m so sorry darling you deserved and deserve so much better

legit one small change in anything coulda prevented 80% of this film

your magic tricks are gorgeous ~ 

you’re so funny and soothing and comforting and so good with kids

you are the best party clown

I GASPED AT THE FLOWERS

like my server nameee ~ 

“hi” that soft noise 🥺

arthur’s hands on those bars omg 🥵🥵🥵

okay i’ll admit i still dont get the whole arthur/thomas thing lmao is he his dad???? ive seen this film 10000000 x and i still can’t decide.

i wanna say he is but like ??? idk ??

it’s tragic either way omg arthur’s wasted in gotham

ruuuun arthur run run runnnnnnnn 

the bg music isss 👌👌👌👌

arthur accidentally caused penny’s stroke bc med w/drawal but all that abuse, like ????? i get why he kept her sedated lmao i’d want her knocked out or smthn too

7 meds between the two of them, probably.... that might be why he wanted an increase???

you gotta lie, angel.

you’re in way over your head but lie

yeeees good boy!!

“a clown thing?“ lmaoooo tell them!!!

NO ITS EXIT ONLY

KINDA LIKE MY ASS LMAO NO ANAL FOR YOU 

he just wants love and comfort and for someone to stay omg you sweet thing 

you deserve the world and all the forehead kisses 

TURN THE TV OFF

TURN IT OFF

TURN IT - 

OH TOO LATE

arthurrrrr ~ 

its like a car crash lmao you know its coming but you cant stop looking

fuck off murrat

FUCK OFF SOME MORE

oooooooh thats a danger face....

lowkey want it between my thighs lmao use me to work out your frustrations i can take it 

“kill the rich” lmao relatable 

this film revealed to me that i have a flexible morality ksksksk im all for it though 

sleepy bb ~ 

“we are all clowns” ALSO RELATABLE

🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

arthurs thriving in the crowd omg yes baby looks so happy

flashes of joker comin throughhh... 

sneaky baby...

quick on his feet, light on his sense... 

tread lightly on my ground, (abba; andante)

THE RED THEATRE SUIT OMG FORESHADOWWWW

he looks good in red

he looks good out of red too 👀👀

that is the smile of the world’s most precious angel omg babyyyy ~ 

he makes me smile omg hes my sunshine

my love my life 

you saved my soul do you know that??? do you feel me and how much i love you? do you see me and these tears? 

do you feel me like i feel you?

ohhhhh boy here we go asdfdgfhgjhk arthur going to meet his dad, only asking for love and instead he gets punched in the face

i mean i get it bc of what arthur did to bruce with the whole hands in the mouth thing but bruce is barely mentioned, like an afterthought?

thomas has a nasty temper i wouldnt want him for a dad

thomas legit only mentions bruce after he’s punched arthur its like his only thought is really protecting himself and his rep with the whole penny thing

his son comes after; legit as he’s walking away he mentions bruce so hes obvs not that concerned????

shitty dad award lmao

not that what arthur did is okay im not excusing his admittedly misguided and lowkey creepy actions but like ????

lmao prob gonna get hate for this ^^ like i did last time i mentioned it but i dont care im allowed an opinion

too tired to care rn anyways pfffft its storming so bad outside and my wifi has dipped idk if this’ll save

c’mon wifi, for me... 

yes

arthur didnt have an attack til he got called crazy, its a trigger word for him 😭

oh baby its okay, deep breaths.

dont fight your laughter, that’ll make it worse 

the way he bounces back from that punch though - you know how to take it, dont you, my love?

you sweet thing.

i wish i could get you out of that fridge omg baby those old ones lock - how did you get out ????

meds are wearing off now.....

darling say no to the show lmao you dont wanna go

*facepalm*

every time i watch this i hope it turns out different

it never does

arthur honey dont ask questions you dont want the answers to

that clerk was protecting you not letting you see the file

that clerk and gary were the only ones nice to you

but it wasnt enough

you needed love and support and help and guidance 

and instead you got literal and metaphorical punches and no break

the hand puppet omgggg ~ 

i want him to play peekaboo with me when im sad/upset/make a hand puppet over my shoulder aszdxfcghvjbkn

ohhhhhh darling stop reading stop reading stop reading

put it down. 

this entire scene is confusing and heartbreaking

ive seen this film 10000000 x and im still not sure i fully understand

his laughing is so much like sobbing here

omg moonshine its okay you can cry. let it all out. 

newspaper clips in a real file???? mmmm - unprofessional or arthur’s manifestation of news??

🤔

we love pathetic fallacy in this house

i wanna get you in the shower and wash you down and feed you and wrap you in my warm embrace “i had a bad day”

my dark angel, it’s okay. i’m here. i love you and im staying with you no matter what

sophie was his last hope, his last chance to reconnect

again im not excusing it lmao but im saying i understand him

hes touching everything to experience it for the first time

he knows shes a daydream

hes self-aware but he needs his coping mechanisms

we all do it

not the breaking in, i mean the daydreaming 

“i had a bad day” shatters my black, shrivelled heart 💔💔💔💔💔💔

ohhh, darling.

istg you’re the only person i ever fucking coo at 

finger-guns = reconnecting = remember me see me

but i guess to sophie it came across as ominous/creepy??

poor arthur trying so hard to reconnect to people and he just cant do it he doesnt have the social know-how bc no one bothered to ever teach him

again im not saying its okay im just saying

lmao i hate how i always feel like i have to justify myself even before thats called into question pffft the internet is cruel and prev times ive voiced myself ive been sent rude messages and once bitten twice shy

the sword forgets but the tree remembers

hes sobbign and laughing and its gut-wrenching

that neighbour yelling “shut up” better catch these hands imma square up

have some compassion dickwad

you never know what someones going through so be kind

always always be kind

^^^ film takeaway right there

if looks could kill penny would be 6 feet under

OH WAIT LMAOOOO 😂😂😂😂😂😂

in killing her he sets himself free. but the trauma and the damage done to him leaves him open to more of the same bc hes so vulnerable

that heart-rate monitor went quiet so quickly did he tune it out????

OMG THE WAY HE REHEARSES FOR THE SHOW YOU SWEET MAN OMG YOU DESERVE THE WORLD

sir thats my seat lmao my throne of red

“yeah? all of you? okay” 🤡🤡🤡

us lining up to fuck him into next week 😂

THATS LIFEEEEE ~ 

the fuck kinda hair dye you usin’???

CHOKE ME W THOSE BICEPS

DANCIN TOGETHER IN THE BATHROOM

THOSE HIPS DONT LIEEEEE 👀👀

scissors = pre-med murder but triggered by “my boy” - term used by abusers. 

poor angel’s triggered by lots of things, i think. theres no telling what triggers his violence and thats what makes him dangerous

could be anything and theres also no telling what his “you wronged me” scale is so ??? 

he’s like a kicked dog... lashes out when hes had so much and wont/cant take anymore

“COMING” yeaaaaah i bet....👀

“i stopped taking my medication and i feel a lot better now” GET OUT GET OUT THATS A RED FLAG OUUUUUUUUUUT YOU GO

OOOOOH JOKER’S LAUGH IS OUT - HES MOCKING YOUUUU AND YOU DONT EVEN KNOW IT BOY’S SMARTICLES

this is why arthurs so dangerous. he looks lithe and weak and fragile but he takes down a man twice his size with scissors in one hit

do not underestimate him it’ll be the last thing you ever do

I WANNA LICK THE BLOOD OFF HIS FACE

BRITISH ACCENT ON POINT 

LMAO he’d so mock me for mine 😂

“you were the only one who was ever really nice to me” a moral codeeee; flexible morality like meeee ~ 

okay but he so made gary jump bc he knew gary was too scared to move otherwise

loooooving the gallows humour with the door lock PFFFT

gotham slept on arthur dude’s hilarious

OH OMH OMG OMGOMOMGOMGOMGOMGOKMG JOKER JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKER

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MY LOVE MY LIFE MY CLOWN MY HUSBAND OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

IM CRYINGGGGGGGG

JOKERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKER

I CANT BREATHE FUCK OMFFFFF LOOK AT HIIIIIIM

LOOOOOOOOOK LOOK LOOK ASZDXFCGVHJBKLKJHGFDSZDXFGHJHKJLKJHGFD

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

MY LOVE MY LIFE MY JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKER

JOKERJOKERJOKER

LMAO HE’D BE GIGGLING AT ME RIGHT NOW OMGGGG

lmao let randall rot there fuck hiiiiiiim (and not in the fun way)

i want Joker to touch my clit like he did the lift button 👀

ohhhhh look at you having fun on the stairrrs

happy babyyyy ~ 

dancing  towards what you believe to be your death

so glad you changed your punchline at the last minute you didnt deserve to die

SWEET FLAWLESS ANGEL I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU

his “oh” when the cops come lmaooooo ~ 

he does that when you grind down hard on him...👀

so used to pain he gets up from being hit by a car and carries on 😔

run baby run...

hes so agile and so quick on his feet

thinks fast too

arthur for fuck’s sake dont you dare stop

you’re almost there, my love.

im so so proud of you

SASSY DANCING ANGELLLL

i love that smug smirk he has and that chuckle omg lmaooooo ~ 

i’d do anything to see you look at me with such pride

ooof you look so angry in the subway but i’d happily cup your face in my hands and smother you in kisses

your eyes red rimmed with tears. youve been sweating and crying ohhhh ~ 

my love omg you didnt want this, you didnt want the riots and you dont know how it spun so outta control and you didnt choose this

i so desperately want to be with you right now

“i dont believe in anything” THATS OKAY I DIDNT NEED MY HEART ANYWAY

I MEAN ITS ALREADY YOURS BUT YOURE STANDING ON IT OUCH

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

“mm-hm” i love that little noise

“i love dr sally” BITCH YOU HAVE A WIFE AT HOMEEEE

“THATS WHAT YOU CALLED ME ON THE SHOW. A JOKER. DO YOU REMEMBER?” THATS SUCH A DANGEROUS LOOK ON HIS PERFECT FACE LMAO MURRAY HAD ONE CHANCE TO CHANGE HIS MIND AND APOLOGISE AND HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW IT LMAO

fuck ‘em, Joker.

You deserve better

GET

THAT

FUCKING

GUN

AWAY

FROM

YOUR 

FACE

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

all that pain in his eyes....

oh, darling. how did no one see you????

his backstage dancing got me 💦💦💦

hes so ethereal and mysterious, so free yet so constrained, so beautiful and so himself

i love him i love him i love him i love him

smile playing as he comes out on stage lmao even now hes being told what to do and how to act

hes never free

spinny baby

you spin me right round...

he suits the stage so well

lmao woop sexual assault (kissing dr sally without consent) isnt a good move Joker but damn what a first kiss...

never thought i’d be jealous of an elderly woman but here we are 🤡

he looks so good under the lights omg so crisp....

wanna mess and smear it uuuuup

~

you’re all being mocked and none of you fucking know it lmao get wrecked

memory problems bcof the notebook + “get it right” - he really cares

ohhhhhh baby come on change your punchline, come on....

okay but that drunk driver joke does make me giggle lmao it’s so out there and honestly my sense of humour is just as dark as his is

i just sHIVERED 🥵

“arthur” HE SAID CALL HIM JOKER DONT BE RUDE

ohhhhh i’m cryingggg 😭😭😭😭😭😭

i cant watch this without crying ohhhh all that pain, all that suffering and all that anger, confusion and betrayal. a mental breakdown on nat tv and no one sees him. how the fuck are you all so blind?????

“mur-rray” LMAO YOU FUCK MY NAME I FUCK YOURS

SAY IT JOKER IM SO SO PROUD OF YOUUU

hes speaking facts

“they couldnt carry a tune to save their lives” and that eye roll and groan yes we stan a dramatic CLOWN

this is fucking heartbreaking omg “i dont care about anything” but then he rants in the next minute - so unpredictable and dangerous and untamed but so so pretty in his pain so beautiful and so free

but hes not free... not really

“werewolf” as a verb omg only you could make that work

im so fucking proud of you

“youre awful murray” ooooooooh....

LMAO JOKER’S JOKE BLEW MURRAT’S MIND

hes crying and shaking and no one ??? sees him ???? how????

i legit dont understand how people just dont see him? people see what they wanna see but it’s right there???

he seems almost surprised by the fact he killed him

YES GRAB MY FACE LIKE YOU DID THE CAMERA PLEASE

IN THE WHITE ROOOOOOOOOM

UGH I LOVE THIS SONG SO FUCKING MUCH ITS SUCH A FEEL GOOD SONG

GOTHAM IS SO PRETTY WHEN ITS ON FIRE OMG ITS SO ALIVE

I LOVE THE ENERGY THIS SCENE GIVES OFF

ITS LIKE HOW JOKER HIMSELF MAKES ME FEEL

ALIVE

his little “hi” like they can hear him 🥺🥺🥺🥺

his laughter omggg sweet angelllllll ~ 

“i know. isn’t it beautiful?” YES IT IIIIIS

AND SO ARE YOU

OH NO OMG NO NO NOPEEEE

this scene always scares me even though i know hes okay pffffft 

the birth of joker lmao

be careful with him please hes precious cargo

omggg i wanna sit on that car and wipe his blood away and help him to get home so i can patch him up

lmao im a scaredy cat til my loved ones are threatened then i scare up this fawn bites

i wanna help Joker to get help and support

i wanna love him through it all, the good and the bad

his slow dancing always gets me omg it’s arthur, still there, still suffering, still unseen and unloved

hes crying and hes in pain

blood smile - my inside is on the outside now and it still hurts

he didnt want any of this. he chose his name ubt not what came with it

my poor clown...... 

CRYINGGGGGG AGAIN

HIS GENUINE LAUGHTER SENDS ME OMG ITS SO PRETTY

i wanna make him laugh like that

it always makes me smile omg those cute lil hiccups 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

THATS LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFE

i love the audio muted during the scene he sings it omgg it’s so prettyyyy ~ i like to pretend hes singing to me sometimes asdfghjk

metaphorical or literal blood???

hes accepted who he is now.

hes free

dancing in the white light like an angel

i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love hiiiiiiiiiim ~ 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

~ THE END ~

[unikornu]

Page 1 - Career Change - Pre-war memories of Lucy Feit,

- Hey sweetheart, you okay in there? Ian knocked softly on a bathroom door as he heard Lucy coughing a bit too much than she should.

- Yes, im fine, don’t you worry. I’m probably just catching a cold after we got washed by that rain last evening. Lucy washed the blood droplets from the bottom of the sink and wiped her mouth with towel. She lied. It wasn’t a cold, but an irritation and small wounds that still remained after an incident in the cellar with court mobsters.

-There she is, all formal but still beautiful. Ian commented as she left the bathroom, putting the black leather jacket on and sweeping the dust from her pencil grey skirt.

-Have to make a good first impression at new job eh? I mean from a national court to an private low investigator office, that is quite a drop. She laughed and threw her hands around Ian neck kissing him in the lips.

She met Ian at the practice shooting center where she was having her first experience with a pistol. He was working there during day time and taking some evening shifts aswell as a bodyguard at the local club. Ian was tall, well built, with a bush of messy short black hair and always slightly unshaved, rough at the lower bottom of his face. Felt good for Lucy to brush the palm of her hand through his chin. He had a weakness for mysterious petite beauties like her and she couldn’t resist the charm flowing from his smile and shine of misty grey eyes as he offered her help that day and a coffee.

Lucy was living in a one big room apartment in tenement house. Walls were filled with red-orange bricks, a few plants placed in a corners and on the window to make it more friendly for the eye and her clothes and papers scattered all over the desk and bed. It wasn’t good for both of them to live there but it was good enough to spend a night together. At least there were never tired of seeing each other too much as both of them were busy on daily basics but at the evening they were always coming back to meet either at his or her place.

- I still don’t know why you dropped such a good position. I mean from a court office to some assistant investigator for this weird old guy. That is indeed quite a drop hon. Ian chuckled and gave her one more kiss on her forehead after she pulled off.

- Well, i hate the amount of responsibility i had there and this is gonna be more thrilling than just sitting in the office, i mean cmon, i’m gonna see the actual crime scene, not just stupid papers. She smiled and grabbed her bag from the counter shoving some papers in and hiding her worried face behind the blond hair after reminding herself why she actually almost ran away from there.

-Don’t forget, at eight at our bar. Ian poked her shoulder and winked at her before she left.

-Oh i won’t. Love you. She winked back at him and closed the door behind her.

As she arrived to slightly older building she checked double the location written on the paper for her new work place directed by the new boss before entering. She stepped up towards the big double winged door and approached a woman sitting behind the desk, all busy with a newspaper and sharpening her nails.

-Uh..excuse me..is this Mr. Harrison’s office? She asked looking around pondering if its the right place. The building looked almost like an abandoned type but still good enough for a living conditions.

-I would not call this an office but yes, Harrison is waiting for you, through hallway, first door to the right. She could only see a clump of black waved hair sticking out of the paper responding to her.

The building felt empty, almost like there only Mr Harrison and his secretary. She stopped at the door having a gold plaque with his name and knocked.

-Come in! A firm voice responded. Lucy dropped the bag from her shoulder and entered.

-Mr Harrison? I’m Lucy Feit...from the..court. I got directed by the....

- I know, i know it all, just come and grab a chair, kid. He was sitting backwards in a big black chair. As she took a sit in front of his desk he spun back towards her.

Harrison was a retired black policeman around at his 50′s dressed formally in a white crumpled chemise, hell of a good one in his career at the better days but eventually life mistakes got him thrown out and forced to continue his business on his own as a private investigator. He didn’t have any family anymore, not a one that would accept him back anyway so he took a long stay in his office and eventually called it home along with his secretary Shanice. They were taking on a small or more mysterious cases that police didn’t care much about trying to avoid a hassle with a mighty ass court as he could while still staying on their good side. At least its what they thought.

- Look kid, i know your story. Me and our Boss, we know each other for quite a while. Are you really sure u want to get yourself into this shit? It ain’t gonna be easy and i don’t want another fucking dead rookie just because he thought that being all gangsta is cool enough to keep his feet on the ground. He scanned her looking doubtfully and raising his brow. Lucy swallowed and took a deep breath before responding.

- I am sure sir. I know the risks and i fully accept them, sir. Harrison put the elbows on the desk and pressed his clenched fists to the mouth. After a few seconds of deep thought he pulled a pistol out of a drawer and handed it to her.

- Reload and shoot something. I don’t care what, just not my whiskey. Lucy took a pistol from his hand and did as he ordered. Ian taught her well on that. She shot a glass on a shelf behind his head and handed the pistol back.

- Alright, tomorrow u start. We have a murder case and u gonna go with me first. Hope you have a stomach for it. Today we will talk how the things work here and where we keep the other archives for our Boss including the evidence that we would rather keep to ourselves. So listen because i won’t be repeating myself twice and if you fuck up it is gonna be your ass to shoot or worse...

- She nodded and followed Harrison as he walked her through the office and rooms hidden behind the cabinets. It was quite impressive how many secrets this old dusty building had along with its owner. His office was legally registered, taking in any small or nasty case that the policemen didn’t care about or helping the gang to clean some shit after them occasionally. It was a new start for her life and just a first step into the shadier part of it. The evening arrived faster than she thought.

- There’s my action girl. Late as always. Ian waited outside the bar spinning a rose in his fingers.

- Sorry, there was a lot to take in and my boss wanted to be done with introduction today. She gave him a long kiss, good enough to forgive her being late.  

- Harrison uh? I remember that man...quite a figure back in days. Didn’t know he is still working. Ian put a hand on her back and entered to the bar with her.

- Actually he is in a quite good shape and he is actually still working, just privately now. I think it is gonna be perfect for me. Smaller office and i might just learn a thing or two from him. She skipped all the parts that she couldn’t let Ian to know. He was the only good and positive thing keeping her mind in a proper set at the end of each day. Letting her forget the schemes and wash away dirt while melting in his arms each night. He never knew and she wouldn’t dare to tell him from fear of losing him. It was perfect set up after all.

- How did your training go? Bodyguarding and looking tough is not good enough for you anymore? Lucy smiled at him, joking as they sat at the table.

- Heh, just looking tough can be boring without throwing some punches here and there in a while. He joked back and ordered two beers.

- Cmon Ian, being a professional soldier isn’t the same thing. You will be gone out there longer than you think. Aren’t u scared? She reached with her hand towards his and squeezed it gently.

- No i’m not. I always wanted to do this. I have just one life sweetheart so not much else to lose, other than missing on this pretty face. He brushed a cheek with his thumb and pulled her for a kiss.

- We still have a lot of time so don’t worry about me. Today let’s have a toast for your new career and maybe a small treat later at your place eh? He clinked a bottles with her and grinned with corner of his lips.

- How about we take that beer outside and head there right away? She smiled back and walked towards home with Ian’s arm around her waist pushing her to him. They finished their beer at the stairs to the building talking and laughing.  They started kissing already in a hallway, going towards her apartment stumbling on the walls. She loved him, the feeling of safety in his arms holding her at night in bed and a assurance that she didn’t remain alone at the end of each day, no matter what happened through it.

_____________________________________

Note: So i decided to try write some pages of my oc memories/diary from the pre-war times as the current ones i posted only mention something here and there, not very clearly. To introduce how she got into the gangs and how her work looked it and people she met. This is very first basic introduction of sort ofc, not saying much but i will be scribbling more going deeper and closer to the explosion. I skip past her job at court and brutal incident that gave her a bloodworm/leech trauma as i am not skilled enough to write such a brutal scenes. (im a total random just writing some stuff coming up randomly to my head) So ye..after the court incident the gang member who she defended before and helped her get healed directed her to work at Harrison office to put some of her skills to good use and give her a safe workplace as Harrison was also in a contact with gangs. Ian never knew what she was doing other than changing her profession to a investigator’s assistant and working with the man. After all everyone thought he is legal and no one bothered with old retired man. I will be getting later to all the night club stuff and deeper into that shit. Cheers.        

[youngkbf]

Better Than Me ↠ Yoon Dowoon

pairing: yoon dowoon x reader gender neutral

request by @mingiholic:  Better Than Me - Bohnes + Dowoon. Thank you. I love you💛

summary: dowoon knows you deserve better than him

or

inspired by ‘better than me’ by bohnes

genre: non idol!au, angst

warnings: cursing

wc: 2.3k

an: sam, you walked right into this one love. but thank you for changing the song, writing this fueled my angsty soul. i hope you like it :)

masterlist in bio

gif credits to youngksnose

not proofread

Dowoon’s hand is gripping yours a bit too tight but you don’t mind. You’re telling him about something you saw a few minutes earlier as the two of you walk down the street but he’s only half-listening. The carnival entrance is nearby and there’s a knot forming in his throat with every step you take. But he still puts on a smile as he pays for the tickets for your first ride.

You’re dizzy when your feet touch the ground again but you’re laughing. Dowoon laughs too but it soon fades and he just stares at you. His eyes trail every inch of your face and he hopes he never forgets the look of happiness on your face. This is the memory of you he wants to keep. The lights are making your face glow in an almost angelic way, your eyes are closed and your head tilted back and even the loud music can’t drown out your laugh. Dowoon wished he could stop time so that he could just stay in this moment. It’s the peak of your happiness and the beginning of his misery. It only goes down from here so why not stop it now?

He memorizes everything. Your outfit, the rides you were on, the stuffed animals you’re carrying under your arms, the music that is playing at the end of the night when you’re leaving. Little does he know that this night will be engraved in his memory for months to come. It gets so bad, that he’ll think he’s being haunted by his own memories.

You notice that he’s acting weird. All night his stare has been on you for a second too long, that his hand is always on yours and that he doesn’t say no to anything you ask for. He seems off too. Like he’s there with you but he isn’t. There’s something on his mind but you hope that your night out can help him feel better. It doesn’t. In fact, it makes it worse. But you don’t know that and he doesn’t tell you.

He walks you back home and he’s silent the entire time. You think it’s because he’s tired which is not wrong, he’s exhausted. He picked up all the shifts he could at his job and he spends all his free time with you. The bags under his eyes seem permanent at this point of his life but it doesn’t bother him. Dowoon is happy to spend his time with you because he loves you.

When you get to your door, Dowoon’s feet come to a sudden stop. You turn to him confused but he’s not looking at you. Instead, his eyes are planted on his feet as he lets go of your hand.

“Dowoon, are you okay? You’ve been acting weird all night.” You finally ask.

“Listen…” He starts but he stops himself as he looks for the right words to say “I...We...I can’t keep seeing you anymore.”

He flinches at his own words and he hopes you don’t notice. When it takes you a bit to react, Dowoon dares to look up at you. Confusion is written all over your features but it’s not what stands out to him. It’s your trembling chin and the tears in your eyes. No matter how much you’re hurting, he’s hurting twice as hard. But he can’t let you know that. Not with your father’s words still fresh in his brain.

“You know what’s going to happen if (Y/N) stays with you don’t you?” The man in the expensive suit asks, hands crossed on top of the desk that separates him from Dowoon.

The resemblances between the two of you are clear but Dowoon thinks it’s not the time to notice that.

“I don’t understand, sir.” He furrows his eyebrows in confusion.

“(Y/N) comes from a good family. Our name is known and respected everywhere.” He pauses “What do you think it’s going to happen to their reputation once the word gets out that (Y/N) is dating...you?” The man glances over at a paper on his desk “Yoon Dowoon.”

Dowoon knows exactly what he’s implying and suddenly he’s angry. He’s angry at your father, he’s angry at your family for being wealthy and at his family for being poor. He’s angry at the world. But he keeps the anger inside him, he doesn’t let it out. He won’t win anything out of getting angry but he’ll lose. He has everything to lose in here.

“What are you implying then?” Dowoon asks, his tone lower and his voice harsher.

Your father leans back in his chair with a smile as he notices the change in Dowoon’s voice. He tilts his head and raises an eyebrow, eyes studying Dowoon attentively before he speaks.

“I want you to break up with (Y/N)”

Dowoon doesn’t think he can get angrier but he does. It’s like a storm forming in his chest and he needs to let it out. But he doesn’t, knowing that he’ll lose before he even opens his mouth.

“No.” It’s all he says.

There’s a flash of surprise in your father’s features but he’s quick to regain his composure. Dowoon asks himself if the man sitting across from him is really as stupid as he seems and apparently he is. Does he really think that he’s going to break up with you over reputation? He knows you, perhaps even better than the man who raised you, and he knows that it doesn’t matter if his family isn’t a known one or he’s not living off a trust fund. He lives off his hard work and he’s made mistakes. It’s not much, but it’s better than everything that your father has ever done.

“So you’re just going to let (Y/N)’s name be dragged through the mud like that?”

“I think that’s up to (Y/N) to decide.” Dowoon stops so that he doesn’t start yelling.

“(Y/N) is rebelling.” Your father explains “This…” He points at Dowoon as if he was pointing at a lower being “Is just a phase. Whatever plans you have, they won’t happen. People like you are nothing but a distraction for people like us.”

Dowoon clenches his fists. He’s beyond angry now, all he sees is red but he still manages to keep his composure somehow. He thinks it’s because of you, that he’s doing this for you and that keeps him from punching your father in the face.

“With all due respect, sir…” Dowoon stands up a bit too fast and grabs his jacket “You’re wasting my time.” He finishes, already walking towards the door.

His hand is already on the doorknob when your father’s voice sounds one last time.

“If you don’t stop seeing them, I’ll cut them off.”

Dowoon’s grip tightens around the cold metal but he doesn’t turn around.

“What?”

“Think about it.” Your father tilts his head, an evil smile playing on his lips “Do you really want (Y/N) to live the same way you do? Long shifts, cheap food, rent overdue. Do you really want to be responsible for giving (Y/N) the same miserable life that you have?”

His shoulders tense up and he bites the inside of his cheek as he ponders your father’s words. Fuck, he has a point. You know nothing about the real world, always shielded by your family’s money and power. There’s a certain purity related to you because of that. It’s like a little piece of heaven in his arms and he’d hate to see that destroyed, especially if it is because of him. He doesn’t want to admit it, he doesn’t want to say it out loud but he knows that you deserve better. It’s a matter of pride but also because he knows that it means losing you. Dowoon doesn’t want you to live like him but he doesn’t want to let go of you either. But he has to.

“I’ll do it.” He hears himself say although he barely recognizes his own voice.

Dowoon doesn’t turn around to look at your father but he knows that he’s smiling. It all comes down to business after all. He hopes that after he lets you go, you don’t turn into something remotely similar to your father. He almost prays for that.

“Great! You’ll be rewarded for that, don’t worry about it.”

Dowoon clenches his jaw as he opens the door with a bit too much force.

“I don’t want your fucking money.” The door slams behind him, the silence that follows it is almost too much for him to bear.

“Why?” You ask.

He wants to tell you but he can’t. You’ll refuse to break up with him and you’ll suffer the consequences. You don’t care and Dowoon is happy that you don’t. But the consequences for you are too much for him to bear. So he tries to come up with something, something that will make you believe it.

“I-I’m not feeling it anymore, I guess.”

God, he wants to punch himself in the face. It’s so far from the truth that it almost makes him cringe. The words taste bitter in his mouth and he’s sure he’s about to throw up his soul as it rottens away inside him. But perhaps because of the way he said it, you believe it. His words aren’t gentle, they’re not harsh either. They’re just...empty. There’s no emotion behind them, all of them staying behind, filtered by his throat hoping you don’t catch on to what is really going on.

“You’re not feeling it anymore?” Your words are laced with venom and Dowoon wants nothing but to cry “How- I…I don’t even know what to say.” You shake your head, hands coming up to cover your face so that he doesn’t see you cry.

He takes a deep breath to calm himself down before gently calling out your name but you don’t move.

“Look at me.” He pleads.

You slowly look up and Dowoon immediately regrets asking you to look at him. The look on your face shatters his heart past the point of it being fixable. He knows that tonight is going down as the worst night of his life. But he hopes you can move on and find someone that deserves you. The words that he thought about saying, something to somehow provide you some closure, get caught up in his throat and he doesn’t know what to say. His mind is blank and it’s getting harder and harder to breathe as he tries not to breakdown in front of you.

You’re baffled at how unaffected he seems. It almost feels like he’s telling you about his day if you didn’t know what the words that are coming out of his mouth mean. There’s a flash of hurt across his eyes but it’s gone so quick that you think you just imagined it. You think he looks too calm to be hurt.

“Is there someone else?” You ask, voice trembling and scared of the answer.

He hesitates before he replies, a firm no coming out of his plump lips. You want to believe him but at this point, you don’t know what to believe in anymore. Up until a few minutes ago, you thought that he loved you, that everything was okay between the two of you. It seems like you don’t know Dowoon that well, at least not anymore. You cry, no longer caring if he sees or not. You insult him, you call him everything you can think of. You tell him you hate him for leading you on. And he stands there and takes it, he doesn’t deny anything but he doesn’t reach out to you either. He just stares at you and lets you ramble.

“I’m sorry.” That’s all he says.

“It’s not enough.” You shake your head.

I know, he wants to say but he stays quiet.

“Say something! Don’t just stand there like...an idiot.”

“I’m sorry.” Dowoon repeats.

You groan in frustration, one of your hands coming up to comb through your hair slightly tugging at its roots. You’re exhausted, your head hurts and you just want to disappear. Dowoon on the other hand feels like he’s already dead.

“I hate you.” You spit out, venom laced in every syllable before you turn your back on him and walk home.

He stands in the same spot, watching you leave, watching you walk out of his life just like that. His chest hurts, his hands are shaking and his eyes are filled with tears. He wants to reach out to you, tell you that it’s a lie. That he still loves you like he’s sure he’ll never love anyone else. His hand twitches but he clenches his fist to stop himself. He can’t. You’re gone now.

Out of the corner of his eye, Dowoon spots your father behind a window. The man gives him a small nod before disappearing back into the house and Dowoon feels sick. What holds him together is the fact that he’s doing this for you. It’s all for you, it’s what he repeats to himself. You deserve better and the only way he can ensure that you get it is by letting you go.

Perhaps, in another life, another place you can give it another try. He’s sure that he’ll always look for you whether it’s in your next life or the next twenty after that. But until then, Dowoon hopes you find someone better. Someone that isn’t him.

feedback is appreacited :)

[janetbrown711]

‘ c’mon, lazybones. you’ve slept enough. ’ obviously Louie and literally anyone else

"C"mon, lazybones. you’ve slept enough," Donald rolled his eyes, "Get up so I can get you three to school on time," he started playing with the light switch. Louie groaned. "Uncle Donallddddd," Louie groaned and covered his eyes."Louie, I let you sleep in a whole half hour later than your brothers. Get dressed now," He signaled 'I'm watching you' and walked out of the doorway. Louie groaned and rolled out of the bed. He stood for a moment, adjusting to the motions of the houseboat, then stumbled to the closet to pull out a green button up jacket with one too many holes in it and a dark green shirt with a pattern of a spaceship on it. He walked up to the door and peeped through the crack to make sure no one was coming down the halls, which no one was. He darted back into the closet and took out a slightly beat up laser pointer, a t-Rex toy, and a yo yo he had all found in the garbage the previous day. He took the items and shoved them in the pockets of his jacket, which he noticed was starting to get holes in the pockets themselves. He made a small mental note he knew he'd forget to ask Donald for a new jacket... Preferably a sweat shirt this time. Slowly he walked back into the halls and into the small kitchen where Huey, Dewey and Donald were already done and cleaning up breakfast."You slept late," Dewey grabbed a blue backpack from a coat hanger. "Shut up..." Louie sighed and sat down."Louie, we don't have time to wait. Here," Donald handed him a piece of toast, "eat this, we need to go." Louie nodded slowly and Huey gave him a nervous look."A-are you sure Louie feels well? Sleeping in can be a sign of a sickness such as the flu, uh... Measles...? A few other things... According to the Junior Woodchuck Guidebook," Huey tried act like Louie looked sick, but he was always the worst liar."Boys, I don't have time for this. We need to get going now," Donald grabbed the other two backpacks and shuffled them out of the boat and into the car. Louie sighed and stared out the window as Donald drove onward. They arrived at the school in the matter of a few minutes as Donald quickly dropped them off and said goodbye. The triplets waddled into the main play room and set their bags down in a cubby. Dewey ran off immdietly to the playground to go and play pretend pirates on the playground, and Huey wandered to the sand and started digging. Louie sat on a bench by a tree and waited for his first costumer to come by, which didn't take long.A young owl boy walked over with crumpled up money in his hand. "Hello Owen, so what'll it be?" Louie asked."You know what I want," he tapped his foot. Louie suddenly remembered that he was a whole year older than himself so he got straight to the point and pulled out the laser pointer."State of the art, you're lucky I found it in such great condition. That'll be eight dollars," Louie grinned and held his hand out."Woah, eight dollars? Im not paying that much," Owen crossed his arms"I'm sorry good sir, but I'm only selling it for eight," Louie pulled away his hand."Wait!" Owen sighed, "I have eight... Here," he opened his hand to actually reveal a crumbled up ten, Owen was not the brightest Bulb. Louie smiled and took the money."Pleasure doing business," he gave him the laser pointer and Owen walked away. He made eye contact with Huey from across the playground, who sighed and shook his head. Louie looked away and shoved the money into his other pocket. Louie sat and waited for someone else to walk by, but neither of his other clients showed up, so he set his head down and closed his eyes in defeat. After about two minutes of rest he felt a tap on his shoulder. "Hey, kid," it was some big guy... Perhaps a fourth or fifth grader, much older than Louie himself, "you sold me this, right?" he held key chain of a dog that when you pressed the button, his eyes lit up and he made a really obnoxious sound. How could Louie forget? He nodded."Well it doesn't work anymore and i want my money back!" the guy slammed his fist on the table, but Louie didn't flinch." I'm sorry, I have a strict no returns policy," Louie tried to sneak around him, but the kid wasn't alone. Two of the guys friends surrounded him. Louie gulped."Well then we have a problem now, don't we?" the kid cracked his knuckles. Louie looked around for a way out."Look, I make sure everyone is aware of my policies and such. It-its not my fault you broke it.""It broke after two days. Gimme my money back or I'll pound you!" the kid got closer to Louie."I don't have your money!" Louie said."Well, looks like its pounding time for you then!" his to friends grabbed Louie and held him down while the main kid prepared to punch. Louie flinched and closed his eyes. Just as the kid was about to strike, Louie heard a "stay away from my brother!" and heard the running of feet. Huey and Dewey."Oh yeah? Whatre you gonna do to stop me?" the kid didn't move from his pose of 'about to punch Louie in the face'. "We're gonna beat you up sooooo bad," now it was Dewey who cracked his knuckles."Or... Maybe we can be civil and talk about this. No one has to get hurt," Huey had a bit of sarcasm. The kid glared at the triplet brothers. "Unless you have fifteen dollars I don't wanna hear it," the kid raised his fist higher. Huey lunged into position, waiting. "We do not," Dewey said. Louie internally slapped his forehead."Well then... Your funeral," the kid punched Louie square in the face and Dewey leaped at him. Suddenly, all Louie saw was punches and hits and older boys and his brothers, he didn't even know what he himself was doing anymore. It felt like self defense, but who knew. Out of nowhere a whistle blew and all six boys froze in their place. A goose teacher walked over and snapped at the boys to all go to the principals office, to which they all groaned, but obliged. As they walked Louie looked at his brothers and say that Huey's knuckles were bruised, but there wasn't much damage otherwise. Dewey looked far worse than him, he looked like he had a bleeding beak, several bruises on the arms, it was a mess. Louie didn't want to guess what he looked like.First, the three older boys went into the office, then the triplets did. It was boring, and was the usual talk of 'don't get into fights' and 'we don't accept bullying or physical violence, but that doesn't mean you have to fight back' and blah blah blah. The only good thing that happened was that the principal only said he'd levae a message for Donald, not make him come and pick the boys up, which was a relief for all three of them. Then, the principal wanted to talk to Louie all by himself. His brother walked out slowly and with a fake sense of shame on their faces as they slowly nodded to Louie as they left.Once they were gone, Louie looked everywhere, except at his face. He looked at posters, mirrors, chairs, jars of lollipops, star student awards, all sorts of things. He pondered how much a kid would pay for one of those..."Louie, why do you do this?" the principal asked. Louie glanced at him."What... Do you mean?" "Why do you always get in trouble?" he sighed and took off his shiny red glasses. Louie made an 'I dunno' sound and he sighed."Louie, I'm going to ask you something and i want you to answer honestly."Uh oh. That's never a good sign.Louie nodded."Is your Uncle Donald the most capable person go take care of you and your brothers?"The question. That stupid question. Everyone had it on their minds, but only few had the guts to say it to their faces. Louie felt his blood boil. Words couldn't describe how much he loathed the question. "Yes," Louie said with a grim and assertive tone."Now look here, Louie I-""Shut up!!! You have no idea what its like!! My brother's and I are happy. Uncle Donald keeps us happy, and fed, and educated in your stupid school!!! He is he best guardian I could ever ask for!!! Don't you dare ever say such a thing ever again!" Louie stood. The principal was stunned into silence. He tried to say words but it turned into a stuttered mess. Louie waved his and walked out of the office, slamming the door which made the office ladies all jump. Louie stormed down the halls, hearing the principal call out his name, but choosing to ignore it and ran off to the janitors closet to hide. He got in and turned off the lights. He sat on the ground next to the mop, pulled up his knees to his chest, and started balling. He hated school. He hated this. He hated all of the adults and some of the kids whispering. He didn't want to be here. He wanted to be home. He wanted to sleep. He wanted his family to have money, but he only knew one way how. Finally, he heard a knock on the door, nd heard the lock click. Louie looked up and saw it wasn't any of his brothers, or any janitors, but Donald..."Uncle Donald! I-I" he quickly wiped the tears from his face and stood up. Donald hushed him and gave him a tight hug. Louie was quick to hug back. " I'm sorry, Lou," Donald whispered."What about that job interview thing?" Louie asked."It doesn't matter. I'm sorry," Donald hugged tighter, "are you okay?""Yeah... I'm okay... I'm okay..." he took a shaky breath in and out " I'm always okay, as long as youre still here, Unca Donald."

[gabrieltheamazing-blog]

Call the angel

my laptop is getting cleared so im putting this on here

_____

"Friday… why can’t it be Friday…”  I get out of bed and try to find the right clothes, today is the day I go to my transfer school after a break and I’m not ready for the pain, and suffering… ok its bad but I don’t think that bad, kids at my old school made fun of me all the time. Now it’s mostly just my accent they mock, but hey I’ll take that over how it was before any time.    

‘Mum, have you seen my black coveralls anywhere? I can’t find ‘em?” I shouted downstairs, “Yes, I put them on your chair, but you put your coat over it.” I looked and sure enough it was. I pull them on after my… other stuff… yha, find my checkered shirt, nothing says ‘don’t look at me’ like black and white clothes. Old vans and my dingy green bomber that has half a dozen pins on it, well it's not that bad, just not the newest one out there.  

I head downstairs and put together my pack for school. I’m almost out the door when my mum stops.

“Gabriel, come here love.” I head over worried; she never uses my full name. “don’t let them bring you down today, you’re my son, and I couldn’t lose you.”  

I softly smile at her, “I won’t let em, trust me.” She nods her head, “good, and don’t forget your wallet dear.” I grab it and show her I did and stick it in my pocket and head out.  

Nothing like a day of hateful teens and one that matters. And that one would be, well, my boyfriend. Yha, shocker I'm gay, anyway school is about 3 blocks and I don’t feel like driving my scooter there. Nothing says bully me like a white and gold scooter.  

---

I finally make it there, not that long a walk but its warmer than it was before but the schools always a temperature to make you cold. I walk down the halls trying to stand up to my full extent, I'm 5' 6" but I wear insoles because I’m a prick and why the hell not. So thank god I’m about as tall as everyone else. I see him down the hall, Yonnei, ma boy, lovely boy, I walk quicker to reach him and quick slam into him last second when he sees me. "HEY, got you mate!" I smile at him and take a small step back, "Why you gotta be like this.." He looks at me disappointed then grins and reaches out for a hug that I gladly give back.

We wander around for a little bit and I got to observe him in side glances, his sliver hair is always one of my favorite things, his glasses the round ones he custom got and I think makes him look fine as hell... but he always does. Before I can keep looking he notices and gives me a questioning look, "what are you doing?" He asks softly. "nothingg, just uhhh, admiring the view." I grin at him and he smiles and shakes his head at me. I laugh lightly and we stand in our stairway, the one that leads to the basement because we don’t want to be interrupted or stared at.  

"Hey..." I quietly get Yonnei's attention, he raises his brows then furrows them looking at me tilting his head in that slightly puppy way. "What's up?"  

I shift from foot to foot and rub my head, "It's Just... well do you know what day it is?" He looks confused for a second then looks at me and grins slowly, "I think so. Why what day is it?"  

I reach into my pocket and pull out a pin, on it says 'cutest person' with an arrow pointing to the wearer of it. "Oh, my goddd." He laughs and tilts his head back with it, I grin, "Do you like it? I had to get it online, almost ran out."  

"Yes! It's great." He pins it onto his jean jacket and smiled, he pulled me into a hug that I happily returned.  

"Well, I'm glad you like it." I tuck my arm through his and we walk off slowly to the direction of our first hour classes because we know the bell will be ringing soon anyhow. As we walk we run into a few kids that are taking up most of the hallway, and they seem like they won't move at all. They ignore us and talk loudly amongst themselves.  

"Excuse us." I say loud enough that they can hear me. They at look us up and down and make a face of disgust. I try lower my voice, so my accent is more prominent, "Sorry lads, are we goin' to 'ave a problem?"  

The one blocking the way the most grunts and moves out of the way. "thank you, that wasn't that hard was it." I say and walk through with Yonnei behind me. Under their breath I hear one say "fag..."

If there is one thing that turns my blood cold is that word. "Fuck you say?!" I whip around and give an almost snarl.  

"You heard me, it's just gross, not natural." He says and makes a face, I stand up and Yonnei holds onto my arm, I look at him and he gives me a look of, 'don’t do it' because if anything I overreact when someone says something mean. I shake my head at him and turn away and I see him smirk and look at his friends.

"Yha, that’s right, go with your gross boyfriend and-" as he says gross, he shoves me and Yonnei forward, and before he can say anything more Yonnei whips around and punches him square in his nose.  

"Yonnei! What are you doing?" I exclaim and look shocked as they pick him up and haul him away, most likely to the nurse then the office. He grunts and flexes his hand that has bruises that are already forming and blood, some from the kid, some from his two busted knuckles. "Come on, let's get that fixed, and going to the nurse isn't a good idea right now..." I take his other hand and hold it in mine, despite the fact that he just punched someone, holding his hand still gives me feelings of pure joy. Anyway, back to the wound.  

We go into the men's bathroom and I drop my bag and search through till I find gauze and a padding it use under it. "Are you mad?" Yonnei asked me with what first seems like anger then I look at him and see he's worried, my face softens from the annoyed expression I didn’t know I was holding.  

"No, I'm not mad, not at you. I'm just pissed and... sad at those guys and how, stupid they are."  I give him a tight smile and take his hand to wash it in the sink to get the blood off it and cool it down. He flinches but nods me on, I grab a paper towel and pat as much dry as I can. Then I place the padding down and wrap it up.  

"Hey, why do you have gauze in your bag?" Yonnei questions and softly flexes his hand, "Uh, special effects bag." "Ohhh, makes sense." We smile at each other and I pack my bag up, thankfully no one comes into the bathroom as I quick lean in and give him a small kiss that he returns.  

"Ok, should we report them to the office orr wait it out?" Yonnei asks skeptically and looks at me.  

"Oh, you want me to decide? Mate, you know I' m bad at decisions." I look at him back.

"Maybe we should ask the group?"  I thought about it for a moment. "Mmmmm, I guess that seems like a good idea."

We made it down to the table where the gang was sittin' and started to ask what they thought. Jack said we should tell the reason to administration and get our story in before they get a bad view of us. Makes sense, with his frizzy and wonderful big hair, he seems to be the peace type and he is, Mac said we should wait it out, but he's so scared of conflict I don’t know what to do with his advice. Indigo was next, she first sided with Jack but then added that maybe we should just call our parents and tell them and head home after that.  

Right as we were going to head to the office, an office member came down to our table and looked at me and Yonnei skeptically, "Are you two Gabriel and uh, Johnson?" Jack looks confused and says, "Wait, who's Johnson?" I glance at Jack and he gives me a look of 'you got this' with mild confusion. We both nod and she ask us to come with her.  

__

We get up and walk with her to the office, worry runs through me, but we are in the right anyway. As we get closer I see them sitting in the office with the principle and the one that was punched is now holding an ice pack too his face and under it I see a bandage covering it. That's so lame, there wasn't even that much blood from it, Yonnei got it much worse and didn't even get to go to the nurse yet.  

We come in and sit down, them on one side of the room, us the other. The lady who led us here walks out and the principle sits forward in his chair and looks at us.  

"So, gentlemen why did this happen? I have already here their side of the story, what's yours?"  He looks at us waiting for a response. He's looking at me funny, I can't tell why...

"They called us a slur and we tried to stay neutral, but they didn’t let up. He was harassing us, so I stopped him."  Yonnei calmly replied and looked at the principle right in the face.  

"Well, Johnathan here told me that he said hi and you yelled at him to move and when he didn't fast enough you punched him." He pauses for effect and starts again. "So either one of you are lying or something is not adding up." I sit forward and look Johnathan in the eyes, he tries to hold it but looks away quickly.  

"Sir, he called us a slur and then when we asked for him to stop and let us through he did. But then called us... disgusting and shoved us." I paused before saying disgusting to try and control myself, "So Yonnei was defending both me and him."  

He looks at us skeptically and looked back at Johnathan, "Alright boys, were going to interview you individually."  

--

It's 2nd hour now, they are so slow with interviewing us all, because it's that important. I texted Jack asking if anything was happening in the normal world when the door opened and Yonnei came out and they called me in.  

I sat down and waited for the principle to come back in, when he did he started out with something I didn’t expect. "So, we called all four of you parents in, Johnathan and Will said more of their friends were there but didn’t do anything. Uh, Yonnei" he said his name funny and awkward, "Said they didn’t do anything too but didn’t help either." I looked at him indifferent and remembered back to last year.

Something you should know about our school is that when we had a week for LGBT and most everyone in the school was indifferent about it or was happy for recognition. But as it was happening and we who are in that were just having a good time, Mr. Hate over here, yha that was kind of lame nickname, decided to end it early.  

Now I don’t know exactly why, but I heard from a girl that was leading it he said something along the lines of "we shouldn’t give these weirdos too much attention." Yha, idiotic.

As he finishes up talking about who knows what I hear a knock on the door and the secretary pops in, "Gabriel, your mom is here now." She says to me and smiles and nods to the principal. Something he didn't expect is that my mom is head welder at Samson's CO, so when she walks in that door dresses in a worker one-suit that smells like hot metal and burnt fabric he isn't ready to talk with her.  

My mum sits down with I look that say she could kill him right then and there and turns and looks at me.  

"Are you ok sweetie? Not hurt?" Her voice is strained like it usually is when she's been yelling over machinery and now because I know she is risking a lot coming in on trainee week.    

"Now, Mr. Lark, what is so important that you called me in even after I said I cannot leave work? Because right now there is about 20 new workers at Samson's that have no experience and are waiting for me and only me to come back. No one else can work with them."

He adjusts his papers and sits up straighter, every man I've seen talk to my mum thinks they can talk down to her or she won't fight back. Mostly it's because she's about 5'3" and looks like she weighs 95 pounds. But she can be very scary.  

"You see ma'am," she looks at him pointedly when he says that and in response he shifts in his chair, "your son and his friend, Yonnei, were in the hall harassing other students." "Oh. Were they now?" She turns to me, "Gabe, love, tell me what happened." I explain what happened like I did to Mr. Lark and when I finish she turns slowly back to him.  

"So, let me understand, you let your students bully and won't believe what my son says at all? Why's that?" She sits back in her seat and crosses her arms, brows drawn together and a look ready to kill.

"Well you see, some students has the tendency to, well, follow the wrong lifestyle and it-" "Wait, lifestyle? What do you mean 'lifestyle'?" He shifts and his eyes flicker around not settling anywhere.  

"Well, it's only my guess as to why your, son was being picked on." He takes a breath and licks his lips nervously and continues, "Well, we can't stop students from being, open in their choices and many don’t approve of such things."  

Mum turns to look at me and I look back at her the same way, disgusted.  

"Are you telling me that my son and his boyfriend were bullied because they are gay? And you can't do anything about it?" She sits forward in her chair and juts her chin out in question.

"Well, I...I wouldn’t say they are, gay. I mean if you just didn’t try and be a boy this wouldn’t happen." He points at me and I give him a look he flinched.  

"I am not 'trying' to be a boy, I have been my whole life, and if you want proof look at the school records and my driving license, it says male and there." I speak with gravel in my voice and so much poison in my tone the words almost burn my lips.  

"How dare you attack my son like that, Gabe, come with me, we are talking with those boys now."  

We walk out and stand in front of Johnathan and Will, my mom waves Yonnei over too. They both sat up more and looked at her.  

"So, you two got anything to say for yourselves?" She questioned and waited for an answer, both looked at the other.  

"They were provoking us, we were just defending ourselves."  Johnathan said, with a hint of smugness.

"Really? And what did they say to you dear?" She said her voice raising an octave and her Scottish tone coming out, commanding the truth... or commanding weird looks from the kids.  

"Exactly my point, you did the wrong thing and called then names, just say so and we can all leave, and you won't be in more trouble." She said and waited, they said what really happened me and Yonnei filling in a bit more and they were scolded and dished out ISS, in school suspension if you didn’t know. They left and my mum pulled us both into a hug and asked if we were ok. After reassuring her, many times she left back to work and we got to go home for, 'recovery from harassment'.

__

We decide to stay together and go to Yonnei's house and chill for the rest of the day. We arrive and head to his room, it is all a cream-ish color with one wall chalkboard that is covered in drawings and sketches with one corner in the bottom having messages I wrote to him. You wouldn’t even know it's there because he had to cover it with a poster of the flash, so his mom couldn’t see it, she didn’t exactly know that me and Yonnei are together... or that he's into guys.

When he came out as bisexual to her she went crazy and just, was horrible. After that we were careful to never let her even think there was anything more between us.  

He took his bag off and tucked it next to his desk, I put mine against the bed and flopped onto it and closed my eyes relaxing. I heard him switch the tiny projector on and felt the bed dip where he lied down next to me.  with my eyes still closed I reached over and pulled him closer into me, he softly laughed earning a grin from me.  

"Hey, you alright?" I ask Yonnei and open my eyes looking at him. He turns to look at me briefly looking everywhere all over my face then back to my eyes, "Yha, I'm fine now...Why do you ask?"  I shrug and rest my head on him.

"I just didn't want them to get to you, it's stupid and they are stupid." I smile softly at him and he returns it. I look at his fascinating eyes then down to his lips, my eyes darting back up hoping he didn’t really see that. I don't think he did considering he is looking at mine. He carefully tilts his head down to mine, and i gently stretch up to meet his. Suddenly my phone buzzes loudly and I groan and pull it out, Yonnei jokingly rolls his eyes and lays back down watching the projector. I answer my phone, the call from my transition therapist, the one from my old town, odd she'd call, it must cost a far bit to call from Scotland.

"Hello?" I reply with, "Hello Gabriel," her accent is thicker than mine, I forgot she can't speak English as well as me.

"Sorry" I say switching to Scottish, "What’s up?" I hear her almost sigh on the other end.

"I was calling to let you know some information about back here." There was the sound of papers rustling on the other end and then the phone clinking against her ear again.

"I know you won't like to hear it, but your uncle had come into my office the other day and demanded that he talks to you. Would you like me to play a recording of what he said?" I sigh slightly and drop my head back, seeing Yonnei look at me slightly funny with a smile, I guess loud Scottish can do that to someone.  

"Yes, go ahead, I assume it's from the uncle on my dad's side?"  

"Yes, I wanted to make sure, it is quite rude and wanted to let you know." I tell her again its ok and she plays the recording. At first its muffled and sounds like someone is moving the device under a piece of fabric then it's clear and rudely loud.

"I want to speak to my niece, where is she?" The loud rough sound of his smoker voice comes through my phone, feeling like a curse. Yonnei looks at me questionably knowing the sound of his voice and checking if I’m ok. I nod and take his hand to hold and he gently squeezes it.

"Alright sir, what is her name?" Ms. Kurter, the therapist asks, she doesn’t know my uncle that well or that he is talking about me.  

"******, her name is ******." I hear a pause and my therapist taking a deep calming breath.

"Sir, that is Gabriel you are talking about, he is not a female. If you wish to speak to him, you will have to make a call. He is still in America with his mother." I smile at how well she explains it and corrects him properly. But it doesn’t last.

"That’s idiotic, she is just a faker!" He switched to English, "Fake you 'ere? Fake! If I evea see 'er again ill show 'er how we treat boys!" The recording end and I tell my therapist yes I will be ok and that her for letting me know of this.

I hang up and toss my phone to the side and Yonnei looks at me worried. He heard the English part of it and i can tell is bothering him, he doesn't want to say anything though.  

"Don't worry." I say and open my arms to a hug, that he happy falls into, "I don’t look or sound like a girl at all, it doesn’t affect me." He sighs deeply and returns the hug.

"I know, but it's still mean, and I remember back when you just started testosterone was so scared for you because it was so easy for people to hurt you... I still worry all the time something will happen to you."  He held on to me and rested his chest down again.

"No, I should be fine, but sometimes things get to yeh." We lay there for just a but before I feel his head tilt like he wants to say something. I tilt down to look at him more and he could apparently feel me move and turned his head to look up at me. My heart skipped a beat as our eyes met and he pushed himself up and high so now we were eye to eye. Mine flickered around his face taking it in and rested last on his lips. Slowly, his head dipped down to mine, and I reached up to meet him halfway and I don't feel fireworks. I feel a rightness, the perfect fit of my lips against his, and how I could live off the joy from being so close to him.  

Once we both pull back i can't help but smile and he does too, laughing softly.  

___

It's dark, I can barely see, I can only feel the whisper of damp hot air across my exposed neck, I walk forward slowly, not trusting this area that despite all the lights my vison is almost black.  

Surprisingly I see Gabriel, he's looking around in the other way that I am, i walk up to him, "Gabe? Where are we? Why is it so dark..."  

I grab his arm with my hand letting him know it's me and he turns to me, "Yonnei! There you are." He smiles and pulls me along to what looks like a beach side pier, below the waves are softly stirring. He takes my hand in his, its warm and soft witch is odd... Gabriel's always cold and has rougher than that hands.  

without warning he turns to me and kisses me on my cheek, then softly on my neck. I get chills, i shiver slightly from the soft brush of lips moving down to my collarbone. He pulls back and laughs.

Slowly a low sound of heavy iron being dragged across another piece of metal sounds out, making me jump and look around, I can't see anything but when I look at Gabriel my blood runs cold.

He's standing there. But, something is wrong.  

A smile is on his face, but it doesn't seem... Real, like he is looking at someone he hates, its bitter and I want to look away, but I can't.  

I can feel the waves crashing hard, so close, the wind isn't warm anymore.  

Its freezing, what's happening, he's laughing. Make him stop.

I wake up suddenly, it was just a dream, Jesus...  

Gabriel sits up and blinks, eyes barely open. I must look worried because he sits up and gets closer finding my hand.  

"Wot's 'rong love? Somthin' 'appen?" His voice his still slightly heavy from sleep but he blinks again and looks wide awake, I softly smile and squeeze his hand and tell him what happened.

"Well I can tell yeh that I'd never do that Yonnei," he says. I smile and open my arms for a hug, he grins and drops into my arms and I fall backwards with him. Gabriel laughs and pushes his head into my neck, breathing in deeply and it tickles slightly but I smile.

I'm ok. I have him.

_____

I reach out and wrap my arms more around Yonnei, I hug him to me and we curled up together. And I hold him slowly getting tired again. right before I drift off I feel him softly kiss my nose, I half smiled and reach to kiss his neck. I do and I hear him laugh right as I fall asleep. My head crashing into him.  

____

I wake up supriesed and confused to where I am. I don’t smell any home sents and someone is yelling, I instantly turn to flight mode and find a pillow to defend myself. I stop when I see Yonnei lying there looking confused and worried, I settle back down and smile apologetically.

"Mmm, what just happened?" He said rubbing his eyes and slightly laughing. I placed my head next to his shoulder and rested my arm across his chest holding him close.

"Ah, I 'ere voice's yellin' and I panicked for a second. Don’t know why me mum yells all the time."  

[braxtonhudson-blog]

Corporal Punishment

 “A’right. We’re here. Go on, haul ‘im out.”, came the coarse voice of the caravan driver as the horse-drawn Hudson supply wagon came to a halt in front of the Hudson caravan way-station. In these moon-lit hours, the way-station was exceptionally quiet and empty given the occasion.

Standing at the entrance of the way-station were two humans clad in dark leathers, both wearing black hoods and masks. They stood in silence, waiting as a man suited in plate armor - a man outside of the Hudson payroll, Recke Stoutmantle - hauled a half-naked man out of the rear of the wagon. This man was none other than Recke’s dear cousin, Jedrek Stoutmantle. Jedrek was, for now, more bloodied than bruised, and was incredibly sluggish due to blood loss. As per instruction, he was also made blind by a black sack that had been pulled over his head before even arriving in the region. While the black-bagged man was ushered towards the masked sentries at the doorway of the station, another man, who was dressed far too exceptionally for such a situation, made his was through the open station doors.

“You’ve done quite the number, Miss Daae!” , announced Braxton, turning a glance towards the slump of a man as he was seized by the arms and dragged into the way-station.

“Was a pleasure. He was a -very- good little boy. Weren’t you.”, she taunted as the man was dragged through the doors. Be it out of weakness or defiance, the man offered no response that humored her. He was silent. “I’ll be waiting out here for Recke. We’ll leave once he’s finished.”

The mogul turned away from the woman, making way into the station at a casual pace while removing the many rings from his fingers one by one. “If you wish. This won’t take long.” These were the final words ushered before the man disappeared into the station and the doors shut behind him.

----------------------------------------------

In the dreary basement of the way-station, Doctor Emrett worked promptly to ensure the black-bagged man wouldn’t bleed out in the midst of the occasion. It was true; Olivia Daae -had- done quite a number on the man. His tongue had been bit off and he’d been neutered like a dog. It was Doctor Emrett’s responsibility to ensure both of these wounds were sealed up before any of Mister Hudson’s beatings began lest the man bleed out. Cauterization was implemented with the use of a dagger blade and a candle flame; painful and crude but effective.

Braxton descended the steps leading into the dreary basement, passing his suit jacket off to Marge Grimwald upon reaching the bottom. While she moved to hang it neatly on the wall, the mogul would begin rolling up his white, pressed sleeves just past his elbow. Moving with haste, Miss Grimwald stepped away from the wall and to the phonograph that seemed quite out of place. The crank was twisted and the needle was dropped allowing for crackling music to pour from the bent brass horn and fill the room.

“Mister Hudson, sir? He’s ready.”, voiced Doctor Emrett, stepping back from the sacked man. And no sooner did the Doctor back away did the masked Red and Fensgrid move in to take his place.

CRACK! THWAP!

The first two punches landed with bone-breaking force, knocking the man down into the cold stone floor. Unfortunately, the hits to follow were neither softer nor merciful. This beating proceeded for several minutes while the mogul observed. In those several minutes, the mans hands were broken, his nose and jaw, and his left arm to such a degree that it would never be usable again. His assailants utilized knuckle-dusters and hammers to carry out their instructions before finally hoisting the man to hang by the arms between the two. At such a point, the burly Dark Iron - Galfouh Diamond-eye - stepped in to lay a great barrage of punches into the mans torso.

All the while, the mogul continued to observe with a steely expression indicative of the mans consideration of this to be nothing more than business. After all, he had assaulted his company and threatened its operation. This was the only feasible consequence. While Galfouh continued to lay punch after brutal punch into the mans ribs, Braxton would raise his voice to speak over the bustle.

“When I was a young boy, my mother believed in the use of corporal punishment. She applied it to my everyday life, for almost any reason she could conceive. Even for the -smallest- things. Like not remembering to fetch fresh water before supper - or whatever that woman’s pathetic excuse for supper was. Naturally, you could assume that, as a child, I hated it. Every moment of it. But I simply can’t help but notice, being a grown man looking back on it all? After that evening, I never did forget to fetch the fresh water ever again. Sometimes all you need is a good beating to teach you a lesson.”

While he spoke, the mogul was wrapping his fingers around a single knuckle-duster and was closing the distance between himself and man beneath the black sack. “Hopefully, this will be lesson enough.”

His fist went forth with whatever strength that Mister Hudson could muster - which, to some, may have been an impressive amount. The brass knuckles connected with the center of the mans face with another sickening crack! It was with that punch that the beating - or at least Mister Hudson’s portion of the beating - had come to its end. In some manners, he was leaving in much worse a condition than when he arrived.

“Get him out of here.” The instruction was firm and curt, and not a moment later both Red and Fensgrid were dragging him back to Recke to be removed from the facility. “Mister Stoutmantle!”, he’d call to Recke as he dragged the beaten and broken man up the steps and into the facility, “You can consider any problems with your family to be otherwise forgiven.” 

Stepping back outside and into the moonlight once more, the mogul would be wiping his hands clean of whatever blood had been sprayed through the black sack over the mans head when the final strike landed.

“Miss Daae. I must say, I’m rather impressed by your work. Shocked, to some degree. Thank you for your part.” “Thank -you- for letting me play first.”, replied Olivia Daae.

A few more words were exchanged between Recke and Olivia before they both made for their departure, dragging along with them the still black-sacked, broken man, following a formal farewell from Mister Hudson himself. With silence returning to the way-station, only the dim phonograph music playing in the basement could be heard through the open door as Marge Grimwald got right to cleaning up the mess.

There wouldn’t be a single trace of the occasion come morning.

 @recke-stoutmantle @everythingisbetterwithpirates @livdaae @desmondpierce @lakryss-sparrow