#literally forgot to tag this post i am NOT made for this hahaha | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tinyboxxtink · 3 years

Text

"Weird Secret Friends" *Chapter 12*

Chapter 11

(i fucked this up by editing on my phone and now I have to post the next chapter link like this. )

Whoooo buddy! The angst is REAL, y'all.

I apologize for this, but also I really don't. And I made it normal length to make up for that short shitty one earlier.

Enjoy!!!! Mwahahahahha

Tag List

@madamsnape921

@lolliepopsicle

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@milkshqke

@wanniiieeee

@word-scribbless

@gibbs274

@sassyada

@aprildecker-blog

@bookishfanfic

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@stars-trash-18

@omgsuperstarg

@objection-argumentative

@thatesqcrush

@shittanyy

@mrsrafaelbarba

---------

It seemed like forever for the ambulance to get there, Rafael just sat there trembling and crying while you started to convulse in his arms. Finally the door busted open and EMT’s threw you on a gurney and took you downstairs. Rafael sprinted behind them and jumped in the back of the ambulance as it sped away.

“Y/N….Carino please, please don’t die on me…” Rafael stroked your hair as you were hooked up to oxygen and anti drug meds. It was like literal hell having to watch this all over again, even worse that it was someone he actually...loved.

“Please, please don’t die…” He looked up to the sky.

----------------

Rafael paced the hospital waiting area furiously, they wouldn’t let him go back with you once the ambulance got you both there. When he saw Sonny running up the hallway towards him, he grabbed him by the neck and shoved him up against the wall.

“I TOLD YOU!!!!” He screamed violently, while several nurses ran over and pulled them apart.

“Rafael! Jesus Christ--” Sonny was breathing heavily while he tried to recover from Rafael’s ambush.

“I told you something was wrong, I told you I knew her better than you did!” He tried to wrestle away from the nurses.

“Okay I’m sorry, I’m sorry alright?!” Sonny yelled, tears starting to fill his eyes. “I should have listened to you--”

“You’re god damn right you should have!!!” Rafael continued to scream.“ She could die right now, do you realize that?”

“Of course I realize that!” Sonny screamed back while looking around them, trying not to make a scene.

“God dammit Carisi, she knew better than you. Why didn't you listen to her?!” Rafael was beginning to cry; he was so upset.

“Barba I--” Sonny started to apologize.

“Excuse me, is Miss Y/L/N’s family here?” An orderly came out from the back.

“I am!” Sonny forgot about Rafael and ran over to the man, Rafael did the same.

“I’m sorry sir but this is really just a family conversation--” He started to dismiss Rafael, but Sonny put his hand up.

“He’s fine,” He assured the doctor.

“Right, well--” He cleared his throat as he led them to a more quiet area. “The damage to Y/N’s body is pretty bad,”

“....God,” Sonny muttered, putting a hand over his forehead.

“The mouthwash has several chemicals that aren’t in traditional grain alcohols, mostly lethal. And her pancreas, liver and gallbladder were already severely damaged from the years of alcohol abuse,” He explained as he looked gravely between the two men.

“No…” Rafael put his hands over his face.

Flashbacks of a very similar conversation happening between a doctor and his mother filled his mind. The way his mother fell against the wall when she heard the doctor say there was a good chance his father was never waking up.

“How bad is it, doc?” Sonny’s voice quivered, and Rafael instinctively took his hand.

“Well, we had to completely remove the gallbladder, and parts of her pancreas so she’s most likely going to develop diabetes,” He further explained. “...And she most likely will need a liver transplant, depending on how the next 24 hours go,”

“Christ…” Sonny whipped his hand from Rafael’s touch and put both of his hands over his head while he paced.

“Can we see her?” Rafael asked.

“Yes, you know your daughter is very lucky to be alive,” The doctor informed them.

“...Excuse me?” Sonny asked while he and Rafael exchanged confused looks.

“...Are you two not her dads?” The doctor waved his pen between the two men.

“Oh my god,” Rafael muttered in horror, wanting to vomit right there.

“Uh, no sir-- no we’re not,” Sonny shook his head. “I’m her uncle and this is my partner,”

“Excuse me?!” Rafael practically screamed in disgust.

“...Do you want them to let you back there to see her or not, honey?” Sonny said through his teeth.

“Right,” Rafael nodded uncomfortably, taking Sonny’s hand once more. “We’re her...Uncles,” He tried not to grimace.

“Oh, right. So sorry sirs,” The doctor apologized once more as he led your “Uncles” to the room you were in. You were unconscious, but breathing on your own.

“She might be out a while from the meds, if you’d like to come back tomorrow,” The doctor informed them once more.

“Uh, I think we’ll wait at least for a little while, if you don’t mind doc,” Sonny replied while Rafael walked up to your sleeping body and just stroked your hair lovingly.

“Whatever you two want to do is fine with me,” He nodded. “I have other patients to see, if you’ll excuse me,”

Sonny nodded to him and he walked out of the room leaving the three of you alone. Sonny ran his hands through his hair while Rafael pulled a chair up next to your bed, still stroking your hair.

“...Barba I think you should leave,” Sonny said softly.

“...What?” He laughed. “Are you...are you fucking joking me, Carisi?”

“No look,” He took a deep breath. “I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you, I’m sorry I didn’t hear her. And I’m sorry that I just...gave up, protecting her,”

“Yeah well--”

“But I hear you now, and-- and she’s going to need to go away,” He looked at your sleeping body sadly.

“She’s in no shape to go anywhere, Carisi,” Rafael clutched your hand as if he was protecting you.

“Not now, no,” Sonny agreed. “But when she’s better--”

“We don’t know if she’s going to get better!” Rafael suddenly stood up and walked towards him; Sonny backed up as he approached, afraid Rafael was going to grab him again.

“Even more reason you shouldn’t be here!” Sonny argued.

“What?”

“Barba look,” He cautiously put a hand on Rafael’s shoulder. “I...I get that you two have some kind of-- I don’t know, connection,” He glanced at you.

“But it doesn’t change the fact that you barely know her, and she barely knows you. You have a job and a life waiting for you tomorrow, you can’t be sitting here sitting vigil for some girl you slept with once,”

“How dare you fucking say that to me, Carisi,” Rafael’s eyes narrowed as he snapped his shoulder from Sonny’s grasp.

“How fucking dare you. First you don’t want me anywhere near her, then you tell her she’s nothing to me, then suddenly you think that I’m in love with her, and-- and now that I’m finally...attached to her-- you want me to just leave her alone again?”

“No, I never wanted you near her because of this exact situation!” Sonny hissed, trying not to wake you. “I told you straight up that she was complicated, and that you weren’t about that life,”

“I am about that life-- I’m serious, about her,” Rafael corrected himself, rolling his eyes at the terms Sonny used.

“Well I don’t think you should be,” Sonny crossed his arms.

“This is the jealousy thing again, isn’t it?” Rafael licked his lips angrily. “You and your stupid ego can’t stand the fact that we--”

“That is NOT it Rafael and you fucking know it,” Sonny narrowed his eyes.

“Then what is it?” Rafael crossed his arms. “It’s clearly not because it’s too much for me, because I’m flat out telling you it’s not,”

“Rafael--” Sonny placed his hands over his face. “I have spent my life protecting this girl, okay? And I may have dropped the ball here, but that just means that I will sure as hell not do it again. And that means that I have to have her best interest at heart,”

“What does that even mean?” Rafael looked at him quizzically.

“Her whole world is different now, Barba!” Sonny gestured to you. “You heard the doc. She has no gallbladder, whatever the fuck that means, she will probably get diabetes, god knows what will happen even if she needs a liver transplant, but my guess is it ain’t good!”

“...Well she won’t be able to drink alcohol,” Rafael said softly.

“Which will make her sobriety that much more urgent and permanent, Barba,” Sonny stepped towards your bed.

“She’s gonna have a long hard road ahead of herself no matter which way this goes right now, and keeping her on track is the only way she is gonna get through it. You think she’s gonna be able to focus on anything but you if you stay here?”

“I can help her--” Rafael insisted, glancing down at your innocent sleeping face. It broke his heart you were hurting, now all he wanted to do was take care of you and make sure you never hurt again.

“You don’t have the time or the freedom to do that, Rafael,” Sonny said sternly. “And you know it,” Sonny’s statement brought him back to reality.

“And you do?” He looked back up at Sonny.

“I’m a detective, Barba. It’s not like I do that much,” Sonny shrugged. “And I have enough PTO for a bit to take care of her. And she’s my responsibility! She’s MY family, Liv will understand that. What she won’t understand is you sitting Shiva at some young girl’s bedside who you barely know,”

“....And what are you going to do when she gets better?” Rafael ran a finger down your bare arm, wishing you would wake up and stop this nonsense your cousin was spewing.

“I’ll ask around,” Sonny now sat next to your bed. “I’ll find her a good place, somewhere she can be taken care of the right way, not some creepy mental hospital,”

“...Alright fine,” He sighed, looking at his watch. It was getting late, and he had an early court date.

“I’m coming back--”

“No, you’re not,” Sonny shook his head. “Look I promise you if she gets worse and needs your emergency liver or kidney or somethin’, I’ll let you know. Other than that, just-- leave her be,”

Rafael flashed back to the last time Sonny had used those words, and how as soon as he agreed, you heard him and it destroyed you. He couldn’t do that again, what if you could still hear him?

“No, I’m coming back--”

“Barba if you come back here I’m gonna tell the nurses that we broke up and you are no family member of hers,”

“You,” He shook his head. “You wouldn’t do that--”

“If it keeps you away from her, I’ll do anything right now Barba, I’m sorry,” Sonny gave him a sympathetic look.

“...She’ll never forgive you for this, Carisi,” He warned Sonny. “When she finds out you kept us apart she will never forgive you,”

“What are you Romeo and Juliet all of a sudden, counselor?” Sonny scoffed. “Give me a friggin break. I’m sure she’ll get over it, when she’s clean and sober and thinking straight,”

“I’ll never forgive you for this,” he growled with a death glare.

“...Yeah, well--” Sonny stood up and started escorting Rafael out the door. “I guess that’s something I’ll just have to live with,”

Rafael glared at him once more before turning on his heels and stomping down the hall, just as you stirred from your med nap.

“Sunshine?” Sonny quickly ran to your bedside.

“Rafa..?” You sleepily asked, you swore you heard his voice just moments ago.

“It’s Sonny,” He nervously looked back at the door, making sure Rafael hadn’t heard you wake up and came running in again.

“Oh,” You blinked several times, trying to get your vision back. When the blur in your pupils resolved, you saw Sonny’s smiling face beaming at you.

“Hey there,” He kissed your forehead. “You scared the shit outta me there, Sunshine,”

“...I’m so sorry, Sonny,” You began to cry in remorse.

“Hey hey hey,” Sonny took you in his arms and shushed you while he rocked you. “Shh shh shh, you’re alright. I’m sorry I didn’t hear you when you were asking for help, I just--I just let you go,”

“...But Rafael didn’t,” You sniffled as you looked around the room for him. “Where is he?”

“He uh--” Sonny stammered. “He left, Sunshine. Early court meeting tomorrow, y’know. Lawyer stuff,”

“Right,” You nodded.

“...He said he wouldn’t be coming back,” Sonny added with a sympathetic look.

“What?” You blinked in disbelief. Had he really just taken off? Without even saying goodbye?

“Well it’s just,” Sonny took your hands. “Honey you’re-- you’re gonna have a lot to go through these next few weeks, maybe months. And Rafael--”

“He doesn’t have time for that,” You finished for him, accepting the truth.

“Yeah,” Sonny nodded slowly.

“Right,” You picked at your blanket as you stared down at it morosely. “Well, I guess I shouldn’t have expected anything more than him dropping me here. He tried telling me that he was--”

“He was what?” Sonny quirked an eyebrow. You thought about telling him that Rafael had said he was in love with you, but you weren’t entirely sure that happened anymore, given how out of it you were at the apartment.

“...He was ready for a relationship,” You lied. “But I guess he wasn’t ready for a dumpster fire of a girlfriend,”

“You’re not a dumpster fire, Sunshine,” Sonny assured you.

“...Yeah clearly this doesn’t scream ‘damaged goods’,” You gestured to all the wires you were hooked up to.

“You’re not--” Sonny sighed and shook his head as he wrapped his arms back around you. “You’ll find someone,”

“...Not someone like him,” You whispered sadly, tears dripping down onto your IV tube.

“Well hey,” Sonny coughed as he tried to change the subject. “I better get goin’ make sure you get some good sleep,”

“...But I was just--” You tried to say you had been sleeping this whole time.

“I’ll come check on you tomorrow, kay?” Sonny kissed your head and started heading towards the door. He hated to do this, but he had to keep you safe. He turned around and gave you a sad smile.

“Hey, Sunshine?”

“Yeah, Son?”

“I uh, I don’t wanna rub it in or nothin’, I just--” Sonny cleared his throat. “Barba wanted me to tell you not to contact him anymore,”

“...Oh,” You looked over at your phone, which was charging on the table next to your bed.

“He just thought it would be easier, y’know? Clean break and all,” Sonny lied with a sad smile.

“Yeah, sure no of course,” You nodded, trying to keep it together.

“Alright well, I’ll see ya,” He nodded one more time before shutting the door, leaving you alone.

You immediately grabbed your phone and began typing a message to Rafael, telling him how you were sorry and that you never should have tried to kick him out, and that he saved your life and that you knew you were a huge mess, but that you would clean yourself and do everything in your power to be good enough for him if he just let you--and you just stared at it.

You re-read it a thousand times, tears streaming down your cheeks. You couldn’t send this, it was pathetic. He already made his choice, he tried to tell you he loved you and you had blown him off by almost dying in his arms. And he ran. You couldn’t blame him either, you’d run away faster than a Kenyan track star if you were him.

After going through all that bullshit with his dad, he’d never want to relive that with you, some girl he barely knew. There was no way. And begging him to come back to you after all the shit you said to him at your apartment was just pitiful.

You deleted the message and then started to delete his contact info, but you knew you needed to be drastic. If it was a clean break he wanted, you’d have to give it to him. You’d already put him through way too much stress and punishment than he deserved, you had to be stopped. You highlighted his number and hit “BLOCK NUMBER”, before deleting it from your phone.

There. Now there was no way you could find him, or vice versa. Clean break. You put the phone down next to you and laid down, realizing what you had just done. You had just deleted the potential love of your life from your existence, forever. You cried yourself to sleep, only dreaming of Rafael.

=============

Rafael laid down in his bed after getting home and showering the bad day off of him. He opened the text thread of your messages, and saw the ellipsis light up, signaling that you were typing. It was there for a long time, he became more and more anxious as they just flashed in the darkness, taunting him. He was so happy you were okay, he had to tell you what Sonny said but that he would never be able to keep him from you. He waited and waited, and then the dots were gone. He waited a moment for you to send it, but soon got impatient and just texted you

“Y/N I’m so glad you’re okay, you had me so worried. I miss you,”

He hit SEND, but was met with the most horrifying response:

“The number you have texted has blocked you from contacting them.”

“No…” He muttered alone in the dark. “No, this can’t be happening,”

Did Sonny have your phone? Did he do this? Did he tell you something to make you do this? Did you do this on your own when you realized he had left. Sonny had to have told you something bad, something diabolical. He had no way of contacting you now, and he would never get into the hospital to see you.

What was going on?

-------------

The next morning after his court session, Rafael headed over to the precinct to talk to Sonny. He practically sprinted through the door into the bullpen, to find it empty.

“...Where’s the SVU squad?” Rafael asked a cop at the front desk.

“Do I look like a concierge, Barba?” The cop rolled his eyes. “Does my badge say ‘doorman’? I don’t keep tabs on you people!”

“Thanks Louie,” Rafael rolled his eyes as he walked out of the station, dialing Sonny’s number on his phone.

“Hello?”

“What did you do?”

“Barba?”

“What did you do, Carisi?!”

“What do you mean?”

“Y/N blocked my number,”

“Well good--”

“NO, not good. Carisi. What did you say to her?”

“Y’know Barba, maybe you should take the hint and move on,”

“Oh fuck you, Carisi,” He growled into the phone. “I’m going to the hospital,”

“Yeah well, good luck getting in here counselor,” Sonny shook his head with a small laugh, glancing over at you in your room, while he stood outside. “I’ve told the nurses you were a deadbeat dad who wanted to kidnap our niece for yourself, so they’re on alert not to let you anywhere near her,”

“You’re evil,” His voice was low and horrified.

“I’m doing what’s best for my baby cousin, Barba. If that makes me the bad guy, so be it,” Sonny spoke like a mob boss, tracing the glass on the window to your room.

“I’ll see her when she gets out,” Rafael sneered.

“Well that might be difficult, seeing as I’ve found her a very nice place to go as soon as she gets outta here. Somewhere far away from here, and you,” Sonny couldn’t help but smirk.

“No, Carisi don’t do this,” Rafael became desperate, his angry threats turned to pathetic pleas. “Please don’t send her away-- I love her,”

“If you love her you’ll let her go, Rafael,” Sonny simply said, ending the call before Rafael could say anything else.

“GOD DAMMIT!!!!” Rafael screamed in the middle of the foot traffic, making people turn and stare at him.

He had to fix this. He couldn’t let you leave thinking he didn’t want you. He couldn’t lose you, not now. Not after everything.

Was he going to lose you forever?

#rafael barba #rafael barba angst #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba x you #rafael barba fanficton #law and order svu #sonny carisi #sonny carisi angst #law and order svu fanfiction #weird secret friends

37 notes · View notes

bleachbleachbleach · 3 years

Text

meme!

I was tagged by @magical-girl-coral for this meme! Thank you!! idk if @ippoddity is going to answer it here or on her personal, but I decided to answer it here, since this is the space/fandom we share. That and some of my answers have to do with Bleach and none of them are about Lightning McQueen, LOL.

I made a fresh post instead of reblogging the original one because I do not know how to shut up.

Favorite color: red, but I wear purple and greens/blues/teals.

Currently reading: I just finished Elizabeth Miki Brina’s memoir, Speak, Okinawa, and around the same time also finished @recurring-polynya’s Portions for Foxes. Speak, Okinawa has a lot going for it that’s really well done, and is about Brina’s life growing up in whitebread part of New Jersey with a military father and an Okinawan mother, and the ways that her and her parents’ lives have been informed not only by World War II and US-Japan relations, but also by Okinawa’s colonial histories at the hands of the US military, Japan, and China. I’ve been reading a lot of Okinawa-related things for work, and I think it will go well with them.

Portions for Foxes is a post-TYBW fic in an alternate timeline where Byakuya dies (DX), and it is absolutely fantastic. It’s Renji POV and is just an exquisite tapestry of multifarious forms of grief and trauma, but is also about moving within and beyond these things, and working through a postwar daily life where you still have to deal with division work (and Leading Division work) and Kuchiki family politics that involve political marriage and strategic pregnancies (but also real love of each other, and real love of the coming baby). If you have not already read it, you are in for a treat if you do.

Last song: Songs That Make You Feel Badass, which is a 19-minute YouTube mix track, hahaha.

Last movie: Technically we watched the new Natsume Yuujinchou movie, if that counts? It was more like a double feature OVA. Outside of stuff like that… Fast 9? Fast 9 was majestic and beautiful in too many ways. I was legit in tears only 10 minutes in, lol. What I love about Fast is that it’s fantastic spectacle even for the casual action-blockbuster-viewer, but if you actually care about the series, all the callbacks and easter eggs reveal that they’re such a careful labor of love. Mind you, absolutely none of that care has anything to do with the dialogue or the plot or the logic. But listen. In the Fast 6 extended cut there’s a scene where Vin Diesel shows Han an orange Camaro and Han replies, "Nice color." And this foreshadows 1) Han’s orange RX-7 in Tokyo Drift, but also Han comes back from the dead in Fast 9 and he’s got another orange car, this time a Supra, which is a model that WAS ALSO REVIVED FROM THE DEAD in the years between Fast 8 and Fast 9, IN THIS ESSAY I WILL—

Last series: Zettai BL ni Naru Sekai vs Zettai BL ni Naritakunai Otoko, inspired by this gifset that @magical-girl-coral reblogged. (ty!) It’s about this guy who determines that he is living in a BL manga because he keeps witnessing the tropes manifest in his classmates. Initially, he thinks he’s off the hook because he’s boring and plain-looking, and then he reads on the Internet that often the boring guy ends up being the main character of BL series. This sends him into an existential spiral because of how badly he emphatically does not want to be a main character in a BL series, LOL. It’s a very meta, and very much a tongue-in-cheek love letter to the BL genre.

Coffee or tea: Tea >>>>>>>>>>>

Currently working on: A fic whose in utero name was originally "Gotei 13 goes to the ocean" but is now "Gotei 13 goes camping," because it kind of seems like they’re going to spend more time trying to get to the ocean than actually doing anything there. I haven’t decided whether I should change that or not, because on one hand the original inspo for this fic was "where’s the ocean in Soul Society?" but the first scene that came to mind was a shinigami having to bushwhack their way around Mt. Koifushi, and that’s really all I want in life.

The premise is that post-TYBW, Soul Society is in a rush to assert to various other parties who might want to invade them that they are indeed alive, and they won, and no one else should want to invade them. One of these parties is the Western Ocean. The problem is, the last person to have taken on this job of establishing diplomatic terms with the Western Ocean was Kaien, on account of Nejibana and his being from a noble family. But obviously, Kaien died, and apparently did not... leave notes... And if there are notes from any of the people who did this job before him, no one can find them, because far be it from Soul Society to write reports that can ever be referenced again.

Soul Society is basically just like… welp! Rukia is Kaien’s most recent protege, and is also conveniently of a noble family, and ice is ****basically water**** right?? So even though literally no one knows what she’s supposed to do, what lies within the Western Ocean, or who/what she’s even supposed to be negotiating with in the first place, this task becomes Rukia’s problem.

To ease the burden, Soul Society sends Rukia off with what proves to be a very dysfunctional assortment of Captains/VCs, with the intent that such a high-ranking entourage will make it look like Soul Society respects the negotiations and, possibly more importantly, has their shit together. (They do not have their shit together.) And that’s the story of how Akon ends up technically being the mission leader, LOL.

Other than that, er, the "plot" is that everyone is real sad and kind of fucked up about TYBW. I am not a strong plot-writer, so I dunno how well that’s gonna pan out. But I really wanted to know where the ocean was!

Oh no I forgot to tag people! Uhhhh I’m not sure who our mutuals even are and of those, who likes memes. O_o @backwardshirt, @ulkoilla, @crysuzumushi, if you’re into it? <3

#tag meme

19 notes · View notes

kodzukoi · 3 years

Text

farewell 2021, greetings 2022 :)

if ur seeing this, it's bc i decided to write something for the new year... (well i'll schedule it to post at 11:59 or 12, idk yet lol but if i forget to save it then that's another thing HAHAHA anyways) hm, i'd love to do personal messages but i hate leaving people out (lol bc ik i would definitely get hurt if i got left out-) so i'll just do general messages instead:

to my moots:

hello, i can't believe u guys follow me BACK, not just follow me but follow me back- what i've done to interest u guys, i'll never know... it was crazy to be honest: some of y'all i found through the haikyuu tag, others through other moots - some are people i've looked up to in the 6 or so months i've actually been active on tumblr and others are some of the best people i've ever met in my 17 years of life (stupid fireworks going off already :/ it is 20:10 or 8:10pm as i write this lol). but i'd like to take the time and thank each and every single one of u who've stuck with me (surprisingly bc i don't really think i have that much to offer - anything worth staying over that is) and i hope i get to see u all succeed and do everything u want in life. u all deserve it and i'm cheering for u all - there's more i wanted to say but i forgot... hopefully i'll remember soon lol

to my anons:

i'm really thankful for and proud of u for having the courage to come talk to me in my inbox. truly. before i've gained some exposure on this blog, i spent my time just talking to people through their inboxes on anon because i was too scared to actually talk without using anon (um idk why, i think i was really scared of getting hate bc hate was really big in june if i remember correctly... or in the hq community at least?) but yeah! if ur not a hate anon, i promise i won't bite so feel free to come talk to me anytime <3

and last but not least, to my followers (so literally everyone):

i'm so very thankful for u all for making this second half of the year so great. every like, comment, reblog, follow - it all meant the world to me and i loved posting content because it meant that i got to read your tags/comments and it made me so so happy. (why am i talking like i'm gonna die- i promise i'm not trying to die or anything lakjsdf-) i actually just ate dinner so i apologize if literally nothing has made sense bc my train of thought was broken (i also need to go shower...) but yes, i love you all so much. if ur on good terms with friends and family and other loved ones, tell them how much u love them and are thankful that they've made it to 2022 with u, if not then i'm telling u that i'm very thankful that u've made it to 2022 with me. i'm also very grateful that each and every one of u exists in this world and i hope all the good things happen to u guys <3

with love,

koi

#happy new year #i wish u all warmth and good health <3

2 notes · View notes

tsumusamu · 4 years

Text

asks :D

sorry i took so long to answer these! i just put them in one post so i wouldn't spam too much

Um I read both your series recently and I just wanted to tell you omg I love them so much I couldn’t put down my phone I got so invested into it and if it’s not a bother if you could add me to the tag list for Amorentia and Call you mine🥺💜👉👈

of course! it’s not a bother! i’m happy to hear you’re enjoying the series! <3

hello, i just want to ask if you have any haikyuu fic recommendations (preferably abt bokuto or atsumu)? Or know any other acct/s that write them? im currently on a fic hunt and i just want some writing that’s as good as yours 🤧

hi there! honestly i havent read many haikyuu fics as of late but alkhale on ao3 is probably my favorite author of all time. they have explicit fics but their rated t fics are just as good. i admire them so much!!

I LOVE UR WRTING omgosh am looking forward to the next part of call you mine SO MUCH u have no idea !!! heheh take ur time will be patiently waitinggg <3 take care!!!

i’m so happy you like my writing it means so much! you take care as well ok <3

My emotions went everywhere!! can you add me to the Call you mine taglist please?😆

Of course!

Omg omg omg I really enjoyed the most recent chapter of ‘call you mine’!! I know you were stressed about writing/publishing it but GIRLL IT WAS AMAZING AND HEART-WRENCHING - and it was a great read! Keep up the awesome work, and I’m looking forward to seeing reader and Atsumu’s interactions in the future like UGH MY HEART. PLEASE, YOU LOVE BLINDED IDIOTS. Take care, lovely!! <3 stay healthy and get some good many hours of sleep! :))

GLAD THAT YOU ENJOYED IT!! yes i dont think it was my best work but i will do my best to keep writing in the future! they are such idiots that i felt myself cringing so hard while writing LOL </3 i will take care of myself and i hope you do too!!!

can I be tagged in the next update of Call you mine?

yes!

you are such a talented writer and i just love “call you mine”. i saw that you apologised for making part 4 12k words long, but honestly write as much as you want to bc we all need as much of this series as we can get. (btw i saw that you said you don’t know when you’ll post the next update, but i kid you not when i say that i’ll check your blog daily to see if you’ve posted another part of the series and to check our your other content as well 🤭)

YES HAHA sorry i do get really long winded sometimes hence the huge chapter that i posted a few weeks ago LOL the last chapter will be even longer so prepare for that....... sorry abt my inconsistency that i cant tell you when i’ll update next but thank you for being so patient and supportive!!

could i be added in the taglist of both atsumu fics 🥺

yup!

i am speed

and would love to be added to your general taglist whenever you update any of your fics!! thanks🤍

of course! <3

can i be tagged for the call you mine 🥺

yes i’ll tag you :)

i’m in love with the hogwarts haikyuu au! i think it’s an amazing idea that needs more stories

ME TOO ANY HOGWARTS AU HAS ME GOING INSANE I THINK IT’S ONE OF THE MOST ENTERTAINING AUS TO BOTH READ AND WRITE. i will definitely be writing more hogwarts haikyuu in the future!!

i forgot to add to that last post that what you’re writing is wonderful and amazing and can’t wait for part 4!

thank you so much for your support!

call you mine is such a masterpiece, you’re such an amazing fucking writer (like the plot and everything???? GENIUS) and i can’t wait for the next update sndnkejdh

AHHH ANON thank you im so happy that you liked call you mine uiefdiasifua im currently working on the update rn thanks for being patient!!

Hi i was the ao3 reader who discovered you and wanted to drop by and say i am sooo excited to read your latest chapter!!! i also wanted to say I love LOVE major love your hogwarts au fic! idk if you know james potter but you probably do seeing as you made an au but atsumu reminds me soo much of young james potter!! i read some fics of james potter and i find him and atsumu so alike in a a way i would love if you could do more takes on your hogwartsau!!! i could send you the links if you want!!

OMGJOIJAI I hadnt even thought of it that way?? now that you mention it james and atsumu in my story do seem to have some similarities but i hope i didnt make atsumu too much of a dickhead D: i will definitely be writing more for hogwarts haikyuu!

can i mayhap get added to your general taglist? your writing is AMAZING, never fails to send me into the stratosphere from how good it is.

sure thing! i’m happy you’re enjoying my work thank you for your message <3 pls dont stay too long in the stratosphere though it’s kinda hard to breathe up there LOL

hiii!!! can you please add me to call you mine taglist??

for sure!

IM SO EXCITED FOR PART 5 OF CALL U MINE AHHHHHHHHH

I HOPE IT WILL LIVE UP TO YOUR EXPECTATIONS!!

Hello!!! Can I please be added to the Amortentia and Call you Mine taglist please? ❤️❤️ I think about them all the time, Atsumu brain rot for life!

Also super hyped for your upcoming Osamu fic! You’re amazing, I hope you’re not too stressed! Stay hydrated and get enough sleep you wonderful human being ✨✨✨❤️❤️

YES OF COURSE U CAN AND ATSUMU BRAINROT FOR ME 24/7 AS WELL. i hope i’ll be able to finish that osamu fic soon aaa thank you for being patient <3 please take care of yourself as well!

Will ch.5 be the last chapter of Call You Mine?

yes!

i just wanna say 'call you mine' is 10/10. your writing? *french kiss* i love how you go into detail - we see both atsumu's reader p.o.v - it gives depth to the characters! it's so realistic too. reader's hesitance is very valid - like how can you be sure of atsumu's feeling, when he's getting his dick wet everyday LOL! thank you for writing this, i am enjoying it so much! <3

HDSUUFHASUHF ANON PLS AHHH IM SO HAPPY THAT UR ENJOYING IT and also atsumu will get his dick wet one last time in the final part... u will see ;)

HELLO AMORTENTIA AND CALL YOU MINE ARE SO NICE im gonna cry my favorite tropes + one of them is a hogwarts!au + your writing 🥺❤️

HELLO HELLO THANK U FOR READING MY WORK!!!

i can’t wait for part 5 of call you mine. this series of yours is literally so GENIUS

i really hope that it will be satisfying!! thank you for your kind message!

I wanted to say that your writing is absolutely perfect. The way you capture these characters I’m truly speechless, and each chpt it just gets better and better 😭😭💛 could I ask to be added to the call you mine taglist? Truly, thank you for ur amazing writing !!!! 😭

AHHHH IM LITERALLY BLUSHING... THANK YOU FOR THE COMPLIMENTS IM T___T yes of course you can be added to the taglist and thank you for reading my work!

ALSO YOUR TAKE ON TSUMU IS GOLDEN. IT IS CLASS. PERFECTION. GRACE. I CANT EVEN EXPLAIN. Anywayz CATCH ME CRYING OVER CALL YOU MINE TSUMU AND Y/N 🥲😭💛

PLS ATSUMU IS MY FAVORITE CHARACTER I ABSOLUTELY LOVE WRITING MY TAKE ON HIM. IM HAPPY TO HEAR THAT YOURE ENJOYING THIS TSUMU. AND YES... CALL YOU MINE TSUMU AND Y/N LITERALLY DRIVE ME CRAZY THEY R SO DUMB BUT I CRY WHILE WRITING THEM

Hi there! I love your Call You Mine atsumu x reader fic so much, it’s so well written! Would it be possible for me to be added to the taglist please?

thank you! and yes you can be added!

hi, just caught up with call you mine! i know this might be an odd comment on it but i'm currently going through a similar situation with my best friend as reader is (gray area, we haven't talked in a while) and reading both of their perspectives really brought me comfort. anyway thank you for writing it :)

ooo wow :O i really hope the situation you’re in gets resolved soon im wishing you good luck!! im happy that my writing was able to give you comfort <3 thank you for reading and supporting my writing!

your video edits are just *chefs kiss* my friends and I have been laughing at them for days in our gc and have even inspired memes of our own 😅 hope to see more them, they’re too good istg sending you love from three art school kids from Europe 🥺💕✨

??!#())(!@ OMG HAHAHA i would love to see some of the memes you guys came up with LOL sending love right back at you <3

hi love !! can i be added your gen tag list if you have one?

yes, i’ll add you!

Hello! Sorry for the bother but I’m suck a HUGE fan of your smau! And I’m talking about “Call You Mine” it’s so good and depressing...but that isn’t the point! I know you are busy with something else but I would like to ask if it’s be alright if I made a small fic about that story? If not, that is completely fine and understandable!

Thank you for your time and cya next time!!

yup yup that series comes with an angst tag for a reason! you’re not being a bother don’t worry! i would prefer for no fics to be made based off of the story, i’m sorry :( but thank you for asking!

I just discovered your blog and I love your writing so much.

I was wondering if I could be added to the tag list for call you mine with atsumu x reader? This story hurts me so much and it's written so well.

Thank you and have a nice day 🧡

hi! thank you for supporting my writing! yes you can be added to the taglist and im sorry it hurts </333 hope you have a nice day too bb

When do you think the next part of amortentia will be up? It’s my favorite series 😫 (no rush though!!!!)

hmmm im really not sure unfortunately :(

Sorry to bother, but I literally went through every part of Call you Mine just now AND I LOVE EVERY BIT OF IT. Oh my goodness it hurts how much I love it. The friendship and the unspoken love for each other that leads to a long yearning for each other is literally my fanfic bread and butter. ITS SO DARN GOOD and I felt like I needed to tell you that. Anyways, I hope you are having an amazing week, you’re taking care of yourself, you’re safe and healthy! Thank you for what you do! 🤗

IM SO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT YOU LOVE IT. GENUINELY. KNOWING THAT PEOPLE ARE ENJOYING MY WORK MAKES ME SMILE SO BIG. THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME YOUR THOUGHTS. please take care yourself as well, and thank you for your ask!

Hi! I recently saw your atsumu x reader fic on ao3 (Call you mine) and I haven't read it yet but I've seen others talk about it on tumblr so I was wondering if I could be added to a tag list for that fic (if you have one ofc). Feel free to ignore this ask if you don't have one or it's full!

yes i can add you the taglist! i hope you’ll enjoy the fic whenever you decide to read it! <3

10 notes · View notes

buffyannesummrs · 4 years

Text

creator tag game!

tagged by the LOVELY: @thosefunkylittleguys

rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

maggie thank you for tagging me in this 🥺 honestly you and clare were such an inspiration to me to start making content of my own and sharing my thoughts on this silly little website! I literally only started creating content in the past week LOL I am slowly learning to open up and share myself, as silly as that sounds! so I think I literally only have like 5 things to share and all of them are just supernatural parallel edits akjhsjkdfhskl

1. Buffy “Lover’s Walk” monologue // Supernatural Deancas: this is not so nice to look at because I didn’t edit the screencaps at all and the text is too small LOL but I really love that monologue and I put a LOT of thought and effort into the images selected! ❤️ I feel like this quote really encapsulates like the behemoth of the deancas story: 12 years and such a journey! Plus it just has such fun Spike phrasing - what’s not to love! I liked the parallels I included in here (purgatory hugs, MWWBK + S15 divorce scenes, starting and ending blood sigils) and how they tied into the quote. I really enjoy the finished product hehe

2. Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Grave” // Supernatural, “Swan Song”: I mean it’s such a cliche, character breaks free out of mind control / evil / etc. for love of another character, but it does get me every time. I love this buffy speech so much, it’s really an example of buffy at its best, where a phrase like “crayon-breaking willow and scary-veiny willow” can actually encapsulate so much heart and meaning. I also love the exchange of like “I’ll kill you.” “It doesn’t matter, I’ll still love you.” I felt like it went beautifully with swan song, since that’s really the thesis of dean going to lucifer - no plan, no hope, but where else would he be? I liked this one!

3. The Haunting of Bly Manor, “The Beast in the Jungle” // Supernatural, “Lost and Found”: my first ever edit! I have not been able to stop thinking about the burial preparation scene since I first watched it, and one day in the shower the bly manor quote popped into my head and bowled me over. it’s very simple but I really like it!

4. Supernatural, “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets” // Buffy + Giles: this is definitely my favorite in terms of aesthetics - I actually got photoshop for this one ladies <3 I am still figuring things out, but I do really like how this one turned out with the color grading etc. and this just made my heart SO warm to make. can’t express the amount of times I stopped to sigh with a hand pressed to my heart, “that’s his LITTLE girl!” it was so fun to get caps of baby buffy and giles from the early seasons. the quote is very simple, but I love how it ties to the pieta image of season 5 (will I make a post about buffy as the christ figure and giles as mary….who’s to say)

5. Buffy Season 6 // Famine’s speech to Dean : oh I do LOVE this parallel. rewatching supernatural with meg recently we watched that episode and as soon as Famine started talking I was just like “HELLO.” I really liked the caps I selected, put a lot of thought into them and really what each one meant for buffy. I have many more posts I want to make in terms of buffy and dean’s character similarities

oh also honorary mention - the cas confession speech // spike “touched” speech parallel meta I wrote right after the confession aired! it’s just sloppy stream of consciousness but the dots….I was connecting them…….

I have also created some fics but currently those are JUST for me have not been bold enough to put them into the world hahaha. I do love to write and I am pretty proud of them though

if anyone ever wants to send me buffy or supernatural questions / food for thought so i can continue to clown PLEASE feel free <3 always love to discuss

WAIT I FORGOT TO TAG PEOPLE: @lexaprodyke @lazarusr1sing @effyeffa @jenderossackles @fionaappletini if any of you want to share, please do! <3

#maggie thank you again this was so lovely!!

5 notes · View notes

curly-headed-one · 3 years

Text

check-in tag!

I promised I would do this as soon as I finished my term paper! Thank you @cowboylarries for the tag, mwah! 🌞

1. why did you choose your url?

Because I also have curly hair and I loved the way Liam said it at the Brits 2014 when they had lost Harry hahaha.

2. any side-blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.

I have a side blog for my writing but I just can't get to creating anything in general right now and especially writing so it's just chilling empty. I might start reblogging my favourite pieces of writing on there or something... I need to think about it...

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

Oh god this blog turns 10 in December an it makes me ✨uncomfortable ✨. But I did take a huge step back from like 2016-2019... Fandom was overwhelming and I didn't know what I could do on this site to make it an enjoyable and safe space for me. I did that in 2020 when I knew I would be spending a lot of time on here again.

4. do you have a queue tag?

Yeah but tbh I forgot it because I don't use my blog like that. It's more like compulsively reblogging 50 pictures of the same event and then disappearing into the void again haha.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

A person I was friends with had created one but they were insecure and wanted support about it which I was happy to give. Then I started looking into what I even had signed the hell up for and here we are... almost ten years later… oh lord.

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

Have you seen the pic? It's so cute I wanna cover him with a soft blanket and make him drink some tea. :( To be quite frank, there aren't many things more beautiful to me than Harry Styles with hair clippies. (This was creepy, I am sorry, but that pic makes me so soft).

7. why did you choose your header?

I just wanted something not 1D related because I didn't like the way it was very overloaded. I liked that picture I took in a park.

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

Oh god I needed to turn on my top posts so I even saw, because I never post because I don't have anything valuable to share. But it's the post about how Liam and Nina Nesbitt sounded good together. :)

9. how many mutuals do you have?

I really don't know but I think it's not 20. I love my mootooals you're the real ones. 🥰💐

10. how many followers do you have?

approx. 200? I don't check. 👀

11. how many people do you follow?

Almost 300 I think!

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

Not intentionally. I don't know what that is hahaha.

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

It comes and goes in waves. Sometimes 5min sometimes it's literally 10h. I try to build a healthy habit (still working on it).

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?

Not that I can think of. I never saw an opinion I thought I need to confront somebody about. I like that it's not all fun and games on here but in the end I have a blog focused around One Direction and the solo careers of each individual member. So unless I see anything harming the dignity of an individual, I want this to be a fun experience.

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

I understand that they pressure some people (me too sometimes), I don't think I reblog them that often, I try not to pay them much mind anymore.

16. do you like tag games?

A lot!!! Although I always forget to do them and feel like an idiot and then understand why people don't tag me anymore. Which is why I promised to do this! 💗

17. do you like ask games?

I think ask games are cool and I love to see what other people do and I participate in them by sending asks to others but I don't do them myself because I don't get any asks.

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

Most of them which is why I am always confused why they are following me??

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

Don't think my girlfwiend would like that hahahah. No but platonically I crush on a LOT of them. :)

20. tags?

No specific tags because everybody I know was already tagged! If you want to do this just say I tagged you. <3

#cowboylarries #all the love this was really nice #tag game #💐#mootooals

1 note · View note

kireihan · 4 years

Text

mc headcanons: various social media

Bernadette

Aesthetic tumblr!!

pls i will be so soft

so many photos of soft, cottagecore stuff

has like 574389 mutuals and loves every single one of them

sneaks back to the human realm to take photos or buy things aaa

posts diys and embroidery patterns

her twitter from her emo phase is still floating around somewhere

Horizon

MAKES TIKTOKS DO NOT @ ME

3 am shenanigans with Solomon and Lia

Actually has a little online gang with them

Grungy “enjoy your youth” vibes!!

Tweeting at ungodly hours lmaooo

honestly her tweets are like 99% shitposts and daily commentary on dumb shit

probably shares a lot of activist stuff on her story

stars in some of beel’s workout videos

Julia

ngl,, doesn’t own a social media

asmodeus runs one for her ahahahahahaha

but would probably post a lot of wicca magic type stuff?

i mean she’s a literal witch

her spells do work and she’s a well known figure in the online witch community

TROLLS FORUMS

If she did have her sight, a lot of photos with “help im third wheeling” with some couple in the background

videos of her spectating and laughing at other’s bullshit

the mastermind behind a lot of pranks

Lia

ALSO MAKES TIKTOKS

takes part of solomon and horizon’s 3 am shenanigans

snapchat stories that start with “hahaha whipcream prank with bephie”

followed immediately with blurry video captioned “LMAO FUCK”

her instagram is suprisingly clean and mature sexy vibes

has a decent following actually

is sometimes asked to discuss a controversy and her personal thoughts and the videos somehow get a lot more views than she expected oops

probably has a wattpad account

has a vlog youtuber

Reese

Youtuber/Deviltuber and a Twitch streamer

Started small but eventually garnered a ton of attention due to his relaxing and wholesome commentary

the Markiplier of the devildom

STREAMS WITH LEVI ARE THE BEST

Reese’s calm, wholesome voice just awkwardly laughing while Levi screaming on the other side

Takes part in a ton of gaming challenges!! Hear of some new group gaming tournament? bet your ass Reese is there

once fell asleep on stream and forgot to turn off the camera so his viewers caught a certain demon giving reese a kiss and chat went fucking wild

reese was really confused the next morning and was like “ah sorry guys i didn’t turn it off” and the chat is like “GO BACK YOUR BF CAME IN” and oop

Sen

FOODBLOGFOODBLOGFOODBLOG

makes baking and cooking videos on instagram and posts recipes on another website

the mom mutual on twitter lol

really sweet and interacts with her followers

her stories consist of her cooking process and end with beelzebub appearing in the background and sen turning around having to chase him away from eating the raw croissant dough

“So my boyfriend ate the croissant dough so i made a new one, but the new one is turning out a lot better so i guess it’s ok”

sometimes stars in the other’s yt vid and sometimes joins reese and leviathan’s streams

eventually gets really big and is invited to be a guest judge on cooking shows and gets special treatment in restaurants/cafes sometimes

Usako

cosplayer! really famous one!! she’s tagged e ve r y where

t r a v e l b l o g

kind of an influencer

makes little resin crafts/decoden and posts process videos as a little side thing uwu

her main instagram is filled with some skater girl edits and soft kawaii type stuff

also tweets at ungodly hours and spams the other’s threads with wholesome memes and cursed memes

has some discord servers and had to delete two of them after simeon accidentally let in some raiders smh

still salty about it lmfao

this is like the 3rd one but probably had a musical.ly and now a tiktok

Yen

ulzzang

definitely an ulzzang

probably really popular on douyin

has a soft youtube and does things like “storytime GRWM” type things

sometimes does hauls on her youtube and drags skincare products with asmodeus hgfhdjghskl

will usually start off her stories with something nice only for someone crash or lucifer’s “MAMMOOOOON” in the background

running gag for everyone’s stories ngl ^

takes pictures of her s/o and everyone is thirsty for both of them oops

has muted twitter at one point because lia keeps blowing up her phone at like 3 am

#MC #Headcanons #Obey me #Sen #Yen #Usako #Reese #Lia #Julia #Bernadette #Horizon #Fluff

12 notes · View notes

rainingincale · 4 years

Note

I just saw your tags on the "harry was oppressed" post. Might elaborate on that when you are not tired? How Zayn was oppressed? His relationship to ot4. Other celebrities? I love your thoughts!

*cracks knuckles* buckle your seat belts folks we’re in for a wild ride here lmao.

also for context *here* is the post this anon is referring to

I think to start off i should just make a little disclaimer, everything i am going to discuss will be based in my biases probably seeing as I am also a brown British Pakistani person who is Muslim. Zayn has been someone that especially when i was younger I looked up to and was very essential in my journey of learning to love and accept myself and my culture tbh. It’s cheesy as hell but it’s true and i think this is important to know before I go into this more because like I said i am definitely biased towards him. Another thing is that I’m just going to be discussing my personal opinions and also my memory is not very good so i will probably miss out a lot of other things that happened/could be discussed. please dont take this as anything more than just. my opinion.

A thing that really opened my eyes to racism and especially the racism in the 1d fandom was the day that zayn left. I dont think thats what the post above was about btw and ill go into that but i kind of just want to talk about this. The day he left was. a severe mess. Not only because it was obviously upsetting but because of all the bs that people were spouting about a situation that absolutely no one had any context on. the statement that was released on facebook gave us nothing. literally just stated that zayn was leaving the band and the accusations and hatred people were directing towards zayn when we didnt know what actually fucking happened (and still dont might i add) was disgusting. people accusing him of being selfish and how they hated him and why he had to ruin everything. Accusing him of using mental illness as an excuse and lying about it and so much more. i had unfollow more than half of the people i followed that day. it really opened my eyes to the fact that these were all thoughts and opinions people had underneath it all and zayn was fine as long as he was part of 1d and giving people what they wanted. which was essentially being the token in the group and once he wasnt providing that anymore? people turned and people turned fast.

i think its also important to point out the flip side of it and that was zayn stans saying that 1d were nothing without 1d etc. i want to talk about why this was different from ot4 stans hating zayn. of course it wasnt nice to see or hear EVERYONE arguing with each other. i hated it so much. but i think what people failed to realise was that when it comes to situations like this you need to look deeper and think about all the nuances of the situation. zayn stans being happy about zayn leaving the band and saying 1d was going to die i did not agree with. anyone who knew me then and knows me now knows that i am a 1d stan regardless (preferably ot5 but i supported 1d until the end even as a 4some) BUT these opinions were rooted in his mistreatment in the band and the racism he was having to face as a result of being in the band etc etc i apologise for not being a person who can better describe and explain this situation but hopefully you are getting the picture. when fans were hating on zayn. with no context with nothing. that was based on racism. point blank. the amount of tweets FROM 1D FANS talking about how he was leaving to join isis and how upset fans were gonna be vulnerable and join etc etc all this deplorable bs. and he had to deal with comments like that throughout his whole time with one direction and i imagine even now.

Another thing id like to talk about is who zayn stans at least from my point of view usually were. For me i remember when i first got into the fandom i actively made the decision that i didnt want zayn to be my favourite because i didnt want to be a stereotype and this was a point in my life when i still tried to shun and push my culture down because i was ashamed of it. it was only as i slowly saw that zayn was considered as cool and hot and everyone else liked him that i kind of understood that maybe. being brown was alright and it was something cool and that maybe i was cool. it sounds fucked up and honestly i dont even know if i want to be admitting this so adamantly but argh if it helps someone understand then maybe its worth it. (mortifying ordeal of being known eh?) anyways i noticed as i engaged more in fandom and looked for more diversity, more fans like me, majority of non white fans were also... zayn stans. and honestly it makes sense because we all tended to flock towards the closest diversity we could find it seems. im not saying that there werent white zayn stans and that the other boys didnt have non white stans but i just wanted to point out this trend. so when you also take this into account and the fact that on the day zayn left it was majorly... white stans who were criticizing zayn it puts it in perspective for you. majority of fans who still like and support zayn are also not white.

there is a lot more to do with fans but hopefully thats enough of an insight and you can understand the kind of vibes that were present during 1ds prime and what not only zayn had to go through but also as a result the racism we ended up having to deal with as well tbh.

now!!!... something i dont really like talking about lol so this will probably be short but the other boys. so as far as i can remember liams always been kind to zayn since hes left (no surprise there <3 also please correct me if im wrong), niall was kind of indifferent/didnt say anything really, and then there was louis and harry *awkward smile*. hahaha. from my memory i remember when asked about what the most difficult thing was about zayn leaving harry said ‘the paperwork’ which was *awkward smile* and he also kicked that monkey mask/pinata? i cant remember with naughty boys face on it and honestly im sure theres more but his overall reaction to zayn leaving was kind of not caring and maybe being slightly nasty which :) with louis there was the massive twitter fight which literally tears my soul in half so lets not go into that haha and honestly other things where it maybe seemed like he was upset with zayn leaving as well. honestly i am a bit in two minds about these reactions because at the end of the day we dont know what occurred behind the scenes and we probably never will as much as we can speculate or whatever. not to mention that this 10th anniversary it seems maybe everyones on good terms which, who knows really im going to try be optimistic. i think whats important to note about heir reactions is that we dont know anything about their situations but the problem was really how fans reacted tbh (btw i forgot to mention earlier this is about basically everything except for harry and the nb thing. that is inexcusable). the boys reactions were understandable but the problem is that fans of course vicariously are influenced by the boy they stan so when one of them acted a certain way of course that ended up reflecting in fandom and resulted in more racism etc.

another thing with zayn was that there were many files leaked with like promo or whatever basically describing what kind of role the boys would take on/ their image etc. and of course all the other boys got things like bubbly/funny/charming etc and zayns descriptors? moody, mysterious, dark horse etc etc like from the inception of 1d zayn has been victim to racist stereotypes being pushed on him. and i think this is where harry comes in because of course the image pushed onto him was also extremely harmful and i definitely dont think we should not talk about that but often you'll see that... thats all that is talked about because people are uncomfortable admitting racism and talking about it.

When i mentioned other celebrities my point was basically just that while ive only talked about zayn in one direction this... is so present among any and every fandom. 5sos, Little Mix, Fifth Harmony... any fandom you can think of, i promise you it is there. racism in fandom is a real thing and a big problem and honestly this is why i always say representation is so important. and when i say that i mean everywhere!!! because if I didnt seek out non white fans to follow then maybe i would’ve had a completely different perspective on all of this.

The thing is also that a lot of this is just stuff that we’ve been able to get our hands on and also fan analysis and theories etc. there is probably so much more to talk bout or go into or stuff we’ll never even know about. I’ve kind of had to make peace with the fact that with celebrities you just really don’t actually know anything about them.

I think i’ll end this here if there’s any more questions you have about anything feel free to ask! and again this is all just my opinion but hopefully i’ve been able to help answer you <3 have a nice day and i hope youre hydrated!!!

#ask #anon #1d #zayn #long post #i also have links to posts for proof of how zayn was treated on the last day if youd like but i thought id simplify #and just talk about what i though #there really is so much more that can be said

4 notes · View notes

lala-pipo · 4 years

Note

1. hey hahaha i saw your latest post, how after you posted a fanfic it's all cricket noises! welllll here i am one of those crickets, I guess! I wonder if tumblr shows how many visits your blog had in a day, because I visit your blog daily to check if you updated Dorm Life... hahahah quite literally, every morning after I wake up, it's one of the first things that I check, because I know it could set my mood for the day >.< not to put pressure on you ofc, just to show I'm looking forward for it!

2. hahaha maybe i should come up with an anon name or something at the end of my messages, cos this one turned out to be long... but anyways! So far, I am loving the first chapter! I read it twice already hahaha the first time I was just so excited at having new jogtae content to read, so the second time I was absorbing every little details huhuhu I love your writing style, you are one of my favorite writers! I'm not just saying it, it's the truth! Your writings makes me feel things and 3. I love how you portray the characters, direct the plot, it's just beautiful! I am looking forward for the next chapters! I don't know if you were planning to update it weekly or bi-weekly or even monthly, so that's why I visit your blog everyday to check if you've updated it! Hahaha I also checked you on AO3 to see maybe if you forgot to update it here and only updated it there... oh gosh I sound like such an intense fan... hahaha thank you so so so so much for writing these stories... 4. Last part of my fan message, I promise omg... so I'm just so so looking forward to where the story will lead us, because damn it's only been chapter 1 and SO So sO maNY things already happened, and I was like... we have 14 chapteRS to GO? Like, where will you bring us? angst? jealousy? fluff? some more intense makeout session? some feelings? I am looking forward for where the story takes me, and honestly, I can't thank you enough for writing these stories... hehehe 5. Ohh! and and one last thing, this one is out of curiosity though! Are you Japanese? or maybe you know Japanese? hehehe I was reading the origin of your blog name! Anyways, I hope you stay safe during this pandemic, ... and even if there are only cricket noises, at least this one cricket spoke to you! and would like to say that I appreciate all the effort you made to make such beaUTIFul stories! Thank you! - cricket anon ;D

_______________________________________________ Dear cricket nony, ^^ I hope you don’t mind if I answer your long message in one post (while answering this I realized you sent two more *le gasp*). Thanks so much for sending me an ask (or several for that matter). It made my day. (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡

My post wasn’t directed at anything/anyone specific but just a general observation I’ve made over the past few months (years -). I remember so many people sending me messages and asks in the past about when I finally continue/finish (w)help and when I did, barely anyone read it, and that seems to be a reoccurring theme and I’m not quite sure what I should take from that, you know. ^^” But I shouldn’t whine, there are more important matters in this world. I’m glad you enjoyed the first chapter of this very self-indulgent fic. I’m sorry that you went through the hassle of checking for updates every day. I should have given a specific time frame in the first chapter and not use the vague word ‘regular’. That’s on me, I’m sorry. T_T I intend on posting a new chapter either every two weeks or three weeks, and don’t worry, I will post a link on this blog when I update. 6v6 As I’ve said in the notes of the first chapter I’ve started working on this in 2016 while I was bored and lonely in my small dorm room on the other side of the world *sways back and forth* and tbh I just wanted to write some JongTae smut ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (not even gonna lie here and pretend that I had some deep, philosophical life questions in mind when I started writing this). That Dorm Life turned into an actual story only happened this year when I tried to thread everything together and not make it into a 170k smut fest. Therefore the first 6 chapters are rather quick paced and there is a lot going on while the other 9 chapters (15 is the epilogue and doesn’t really have plot) are slower paced. So I hope you will also enjoy the other chapters of this little story. ^^ “Like, where will you bring us? angst? jealousy? fluff? some more intense makeout session? some feelings?” Dear cricket nony, I will bring you to all of these things to varying degrees. ^^ I know people don’t like it when pairings are mentioned in the main pairing tag when they aren’t the end goal or just side!pairings (*raises hand* I’m one of those people 😂) that’s why I only mentioned 2min and JongKey in the additional tags, but they will play a crucial role throughout the fic. ^^ So, anyway - I really hope that you will enjoy the rest of the fic as well. I’m still tweaking some of the chapters because there are some things I’m not happy with yet, but yeah - please look forward to the rest OTL. As for your last question - I’m not Japanese. But the dormitory that inspired this story was in fact located in Japan. I studied there for a year during my Master’s in Japanese studies. I chose the pen name ‘lala pipo’ because I read the book with the same title in 2010 and liked the narration of it (fun fact: I’m currently re-reading it again because I couldn’t remember why I liked it so much ^^). I posted my first two? SHINee stories still under my original livejournal username, but I didn’t want to spam my private account with fanfics - so I created a new one just for fics and just liked how lala pipo sounded. It’s also easy to remember I think. ^^ Once again, thanks so much for your very sweet messages, cricket nony. You are always welcome to cricket some more. ♡ ～('▽^人) I hope you will also stay safe during this time. I wish you the loveliest of days! Thank you! (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ ) ♡

#asks #non-fic post #cute people #cricket nony #Anonymous

1 note · View note

water-writings · 5 years

Text

11/11/11

I was tagged by @demidemonwrites and @ezwriting. Thanks you guys and sorry this took so long to write!

I know I will be breaking the rules to some extent, but I will be answering both their sets of 11 questions here. I don’t have exactly 11 people to tag, let alone 22 at the moment haha. Sorry!

Demidemonwrites’ questions!

1) Least favorite writing trope?

I’m going to be honest, I’m not entire sure. I’ve never thought of this before. I actually went through a couple forums where people are telling their least favorite tropes to see if anything struck with me. Honestly, I couldn’t find anything. Maybe I haven’t read a lot to know what I don’t like or if I’m just not that picky. I guess if things are written well I’ll be down with anything.

I guess if I had to pick one, it would have to be “the good guy is actually the villain” trope. With Frozen I remember when I first sat down in the theater and thinking “Haha what if Hans was the villain” and then BOOM I was right. There was some other movie I watched where I called one of the good guys being the villain, but I can’t remember what it was.

2) Which of your characters are underdeveloped but you want to develope more?

My current new character for My Hero Academia, Yuriko Umeda. She’s the first character since my Marvel character, Tracey Madison, that I’m super excited to work on and write for!

3) Do you prefer writing stories or worldbuilding?

I prefer writing stories. I’ve mostly written fanfiction and gone off of worlds from fandoms. But I have recently been practicing worldbuilding by attempting to add onto the already existing worlds. I have an original story in the works, but I haven’t touched it in nearly four years. It’s there, but I’m struggling with it. Maybe one day I’ll finally figure it out. But yes, I like writing stories more so than worldbuilding at the moment.

4) Where do you do most of your writing? (In bed, at a desk, ect...)

Literally anywhere. I write on my computer and on my phone on Google Docs so writing is portable for me. I do tend to write more on my bed or on a couch. I guess somewhere where I’m comfy.

5) If you have multiple ocs, what do you do to keep all their info organized?

Hahahaha I don’t. I’m pretty sure there have been times where I created a character in my head, came back to them months or even years later and forgot what their name was. I used to write a list of characters I created (even ones that I didn’t have stories for) back in high school, but now I don’t. I guess I just remember characters I really like. If I write for them I remember them of course, but if they are characters I have in my head and create a story for them then I tend to remember those characters. Although, I probably should start keeping them organized somehow.

6) Do you write your ideas down or are they mostly in your head?

Both. I tend to come up with ideas in my head (as everyone does haha) and when I have time I write them down on my notes section of my google doc for the story. But I also have ideas written down and in my head. Small ideas come to mind every now and then that I forget about that pop back up or they are minor details that I’ll write in as I write the story.

7) What is your character(s) favorite food?

Yuriko’s favorite food is omu rice.

Tracey’s is Hawaiin pizza.

Barry’s would be fried rice.

Aria’s is cookies.

Wes likes pretzels. Crunchy or soft he loves them.

Lyra’s is meatloaf.

I haven’t thought of Barry’s, Wes’, or Lyra’s before but those popped in my head. It might change, not sure haha.

There are probably other characters that I can’t think of at the moment or characters that I haven’t written for in forever that I just omitted from this list. These are my recent projects.

8) Out of all your character, which has the best story arc?

I guess Tracey? She’s the character who I actually write a complete story for instead of abandoning it. To this day I’m not sure how I did it, but I did. I have four stories completed in the series with her in it. The second one I liked, but looking back on it there’s some stuff I’d like to change in it. But I also think with that story I was able to develop her character more after that.

9) Do you prefer heroes, villains, or anti-heroes?

D. All of the above. I like characters who are well written. Even if its a villain I will like their character.

10) What character have you had the longest?

My longest character would be from my very first fanfic ever, but I don’t want people looking into that one hahaha! Out of my recent characters its definitely Tracey and Barry.

11) Favorite villian trope?

This was another thing that I’ve never thought about before and once again I looked into lists of villain tropes. I think I like bad just to be bad. One of my favorite villains is Joker and he’s evil just because. Another trope (if you count it as a trope or personality) is crazy. Harley Quinn, Junko Enoshima, and Himiko Toga are happy crazy and I don’t know why, but I love characters like that.

Ezwriting’s questions!

1. Do you listen to anything while you write? Music, television, white noise, etc.

I tend to have something on in the background, whether it’s music, TV, or YouTube. I just like to have background noise. I do like to use music to picture scenes for stories. There’s been times where I’m listening to a song randomly one day and I just picture a new scene that has that song playing as background music and I just add it to a story.

2. Can you describe your favorite character? Either yours or a beloved favorite from a book or any other media – I’d just love to hear about them.

Tracey and Barry are my MCU OCs. They are the Madison twins and they’ve been with me since I was a freshman in college. So about six years or so. That may have given away my age who knows lol.

Barry worked with SHIELD and was picked up right out of high school. Tracey didn’t know what he did until the Battle of New York where she basically interrogated him on his uniform. Tracey is a hacker. She majored in Computer Science (even though I know absolutely nothing about it) and she has been playing with computers since she was a kid. She had an interest in them.

Pepper was a friend of their mom’s so that’s how they met Tony and then the Avengers through Tony. Everything just falls into place or goes down hill from there!

I’ve worked so much on them that they have become my favorites. But at this point, I’m taking a hard hiatus on them and focusing on other characters.

3. When you write, do you have any particular requirements before you can start? (Have to be a specific somewhere, need music, etc.)

Nope! If I end up writing, I’m lucky. I have the worst attention span and lack of inspiration at times that the moment I sit down and try and write I end up watching the most random videos on YouTube or scroll through Tumblr. It’s bad haha.

4. Do you prefer to be hot or cool when writing? Do you snuggle up with blankets or have fans running, or are you somewhere in - between?

I’m in between. It depends on the day. Like right now I’m fine sitting on my couch in some comfy shorts and a shirt and write. But some times my legs might get cold and I’ll lay a blanket on them. But that’s usually if it’s cold out. I’m in between.

5. What kind of writing ‘quirks’ do you have?

None. I literally sit and write. I usually have background noises I mentioned in the first question (sometimes, very rarely, will I write in silence). I might have a cup of tea or a snack, but other than those I don’t think I have any writing quirks.

6. What is your favorite book or book series?

Harry Potter, Peter and the Star Catchers, and The Truth About Forever.

7. Is there anyone who inspires your writing?

@pen-in-hand @apocalyvse They’re writing is amazing!!

8. What first got you started in writing?

I honestly can’t even remember. I think it was this anime that’s my favorite called D Gray Man. A friend got me into it late 8th grade early freshman year of high school and I loved it. I was also a major major dork back then (probably still am but not as much) and had a crush on one of the characters that I wanted to create my own to add into the story. I think one of my friends told me about ff.net and I picked up a notebook and pen and started writing.

I do remember a couple times in elementary school where I had to write short stories. One I think I still have in my junk somewhere that was about a dog wanting to be a sled dog and the other was I had to write how the Oregon Trail was made. That one I don’t have, but I think I remember I wrote about how a girl ran into a goblin in a forest and had some competition with him over something. She ended up using this basket she had and used it to create the trail.

Elementary school Mel was wild. I don’t even know how I remember that Oregon Trail one. Star Kid pick up my story and make a prequel to Trail to Oregon.

9. What would you suggest to new writers?

Just write. Even if you think it’s bad, just write and post it. Someone is going to love it. You are also your worst critic. I look back at my first fanfic and CRINGE when I think about it. But I have reviews on it. I also look back on it and realize that I have improved so much since then. You improve as you write and you can only go up. If you enjoy it, keep writing.

10. Do you prefer to write first, second or third person?

Third person for sure!

11. How do deadlines affect your writing? Do they hinder or help you?

I don’t set deadlines for myself. Unless I’m writing something for a holiday or as a present to someone. I don’t do deadlines, but I think it would either help or hinder me. It would help me sit down and write, but I also think - knowing me - that I’d procrastinate and then rush to meet the deadline. Rushing would then result in my worst work I think. Maybe. But I just don’t do deadlines. I post when I want to.

My questions

1. Do you write fanfictions or original stories and did you ever write fanfiction?

2. Did you ever write your stories in the middle of class instead of paying attention?

3. How many notebooks do you have filled with your writing?

4. What’s your favorite way to write? Notebook, Word Doc, Google Docs?

5. Do you write by yourself or do you need people writing with you?

6. Have you ever cowritten with someone?

7. Who do you bounce ideas off of?

8. Have you ever taken an experience from your life and written it into a story?

9. Favorite type of music to listen to while you write.

10. Have you ever had anyone give you “advice” that hurt you and prevented you from writing for a while?

11. Have you ever had fans of your writing pester to write a certain way?

I tag @pen-in-hand @apocalyvse @starsandstormyseas @loopally @morganwriteblr @writing-and-nutmeg @luciandra-writing @nightwingshero @scouthearted @invernessie41 @odpadkywriter @alalawrites

I did 12 instead of 11 since I had two sets of questions haha!

#ask me things #tag game #mel writes #writeblr #my ocs #my stories #wow this was a long post but a lot of fun!!

5 notes · View notes

vts-ship-and-let-ship · 5 years

Text

Abuse (TW for P-do and other heavy topics)

Fiction leads to abuse? People groom with Lo/i and Shot@ p0rn?

Let’s talk about how my abuser- we’ll call him Alaska- groomed me. Let’s talk about how Predator found me and pushed me to give him pictures and videos of himself while making me feel trapped and threatening suicide if I left.

I was 13/14, he was 18.

And I was heavily into Hetalia- for your information the rating of hetalia is Mature - 17, aka its for adults- and roleplaying. I used deviant art. I also was highly into helping people with their issues and mediating- hasn’t changed much has it- and you know what.

It wasn’t the inc-st ships, the r-pe fics or anything like that he used. No, he used my ability to write in roleplaying- complimenting my OC/persona- he used my willingness to help. He used my love for Hetalia, away from my fictional preferences.

He used my willingness to write smut at that age.

But the shit people call CP. Adult/Minor ships, In-est, Ra-e, Literal Ped-phili- in fiction.

Nope. He didn’t even know. And you know why I thought it was okay?

Not twilight. Not the dark fic I read to cope with my family, sexuality and with my own intrusive thoughts and widely continuing nightmares.

Oh it was because he made me feel better. My want to help? He used that to make me feel like I was smart. Like I could do more.

Then when I was dating him, he started threatening to hack me and my friends.

Want to know the things I could say I blame for my abuse?

Deviantart Chats. Hetalia. Roleplaying. Helping people out.

What I actually blame?

The owner of the server, who encouraged me to seek the relationship (though it wasn’t gay so it was disgusting). The rampant antism and elitism that I was pressured into. I already read that stuff going into the chat, but I was made to feel disgusting and awful, to the point where the owner actually said Anton who read what I did, deserved to be hurt. (Hahaha I was, you also abusive piece of sh-t 21 y/o).

I blame Alaska most of all. He used me, threatened me. Threatened my- now ex who also was abusive- boyfriend, two years after I blocked him the first time. Also faking a gunshot to himself and acting like he forgot we broke up from it. (I checked the news in his country when he mentioned he was shot by someone).

Wanna know who helped me escape that? People who liked Dark Fic. People who read r-pe. Inc-st. Abuse. Who roleplayed it. They helped me through it, helped me understand I didn’t deserve it.

Can fiction affect reality, yeah. It can. Can bad fic help someone be abused? Yeah, but it’s not the only thing, and bad fic can help others.

People who read bad fic aren’t fucking, abusers. And people who fucking are against that shit, can in fact encourage predators and shit.

It can be reversed, sure.

But antis, and anti antis, aren’t actually the full hallmark of what’s an abuser. Antis can fucking encourage abuse, sexu-l or otherwise.

I mean, I don’t have the receipts anymore, but I literally got anons on @victim-that-speaks about how I LOVED being r-ped by my dad. How they hoped I dated a MAP who r-ped my kid so I could call them non-offending. They said I was a fujo because of the r-pe, and that I must have enjoyed it.

1) As a kid, at 4, we (the system and I) were r-ped using Cannabis and Beer. Being drunk, and weed, are triggers to me because of it.

2) My father only made inappropriate comments about my s-x life and my body, he never touched me s-xually. If he touched me, it was to beat me.

3) I got that anon for saying that reducing attraction to why people r-pe ignores people like me who was attacked for just being there. It erases victims of opportunity and makes r-pe out to be about attraction. And that it was better to call them child m-lestors. I also mentioned how I wanted the criminal stigma to vanish so these people could see a therapist to help not act on their attraction, since- BIG FUCKING POINT- criminalizing it only means kids get killed after.

4) I believe I also got these because I said we shouldn’t criminalize teens/kids who have C/P made of them/take their own nudes. Not as a kid or an adult. It basically criminalizes who is supposed to be the victim. Just no.

5) I’m a trans man. I’m not a fujoshi, however I am a fudanshi. Do I read darkfic and shit because of my abuse? Probably. Does it mean I’m awful? Nope. I- as a survivor of multiple forms of abus e- do not need to be told that I deserve to be r-ped because later I read it.

6) I find it disgusting that I was told that I enjoyed it. Not only was I four- this was easy to search on my blog- I also mentioned how it upset me gravely. In fact, even if I had enjoyed it, I was a toddler. That portion of the asks, made me go throw up. Literally. I had to.

This came from antis. Along with the hope my mother and I suffer and get r-ped again (Both survivors), that I was a child m-lestor not actually a survivor (for 20 reblogs I was gaslit, yay), and various antis made fun of my “Please don’t message me” trigger, because I was heavily gaslit by several to the point where it caused a panic attack at the time.

I was mocked, put out on display, and torn to shreds.

There are nice antis who actually spoke to me, were understanding. They understand I have an issue with romanticization- personal issue- but don’t see the line where they do.

I do think fiction affects reality. I think it’s a reflection of society and therefore can strengthen societal bias, however the way to deal with it isn’t to delete all the problematic fiction, it would be to go out and fully educate people.

This kinda was a vent. I’m still not really an anti-anti/pro-shipper, only because I don’t like aligning myself either way in this discourse. I still can’t keep on topic.

Feel free to reblog. I’m not going to even deal with people who literally tell me I deserved to be hurt, I won’t look in the direction of people who think my point of, blaming the tool and not the user is alright.

I don’t actually want M/P discourse, it’s a heavily sore subject, makes me almost violently ill and I dissociate a lot during its mention. I have the tags blocked.

I’m not getting in debates on how my abuse happened, I’ve had years to deal with it.

Minors, don’t touch this post with a ten foot pole, I’m 21. I don’t need you to bother me on it, I don’t want to discuss sexual topics with yas.

- Dragon

#anti anti shipping #anti anti #trigger warning #tw: abuse #i cant tag the other shit

5 notes · View notes

ultraviolet-fox · 5 years

Text

Ok y’all don’t understand how messy my middle school career was

(literally everything is ON TUMBLR in my tags that only I know about thank god) but since I was looking back, my friend group was just a whole bunch of horny virgins. (Well. Until I lost my virginity. I was 13 too?!?! I was too young :(

Anyways... I’ll name the people off as fruit because idk if they’ll care about this or not but still, be careful. I hope it’s a laugh for everyone as it is for me as well (more of cringe but oh well)

So it kinda all started when I met tomato in sixth grade. Idk why but like I always felt the need to like him, ever since I first saw him but maybe that was just because he was the funny kid in class that literally everyone wanted to be friends with. And since I’m too “hipster for that” I never really pursued or took the time to talk to him because I thought he never really wanted to talk to me. A whole year of whenever me and tomato would sit next or near each other, he’d always make me laugh and I literally don’t know why. I would always giggle and I remember he gave me the nickname “the giggler” or something. But anyways I ended up dating his friend (lol). I honestly don’t know why cause we had -10,000 things in common and also we dated for like 2 months which in middle school terms, was like 2 years! But I found out later he really dated me to be petty towards tomato because he’s the one who really liked me. (Classic, right? I don’t know if this is true tbh lol but it’s what I’ve been told) and thennnnn seventh grade started up. And that was when shit started to happen. I dated Nico (I’ll say his name bc I’m still friends with him and I love him to this day!!! <33 ) and that lasted a while, i don’t remember how long lmao I just know he was my first kiss but I ended up breaking up with him because Tomato confessed his feelings for me over tumblr (lmao what a website) and I ended up liking him. BUT after I broke up with Nico, tomato started dating pineapple. And pineapple was like, my sworn enemy. (I literally don’t know how they started talking tho like I’m trying to remember but I don’t) but anyways, that happened and it fricking sucked. Pineapple and I were similar in many ways, we dyed our hair, drew a shit ton, and we’re fricking weebs. So seeing that, it hurt that my crush and my enemy were together. But needless to say it was rocky af LMAO. But I still supported tomato all the way because I liked him that much. I even went on a “double date” with them and Nico and I. Idfk why but fuck I was a dumbass. Anyways, I was always there for tomato when shit would happen and they would “break up.” I thought, this is my chance only for them to get back together the next day. I was pissed. 12 year old me. Angry. But they ended up actually breaking up and I was always there for him, telling him to delete pictures, delete posts, and anything else that reminded him of her. We spent all of the summer pretty much together, me and tomato. We made butter beer, a cake I think, and lots more whenever I came over. (Lowkey his house was like, always nice I was like wow.) and when he moved to an even bigger house that was she shit was starting to go down. We’d, well, he would play games and I would always watch him and of course be flirty. I remember this one time he put a pair of headphones on me and told me he liked me but I literally couldn’t hear him hahaha. But needless to say, we got together. (Wow surprised much? I am) and theeennn eighth grade. That year was a fuckin whirlwind. Me and tomato actually got together on the day of the “Arizona flood” where we had no school! And then after was just a whole bunch of blah blah blah depressing episodes attempted blah blah blah (who knew two toxic people would make an even more toxic relationship? Wow) and yeah we broke up obviously. Still kinda mad how he kissed 5 people 5 days after we broke up and got in another relationship 2 weeks later. (But I look back and I realize I did the same LMAO.) But that didn’t matter cause I was having fun with my friends. 6 months later and me and pineapple started talking (Idk how... we just did) and like... actually started to like each other. I went to the school play with her and all we did was cuddle, we would kiss multiple times just “for the heck of it” (lowkey she was a good kisser) and we hung out all summer with all our friends. And theeenn freshman year came! We both had short dyed hair, I thought she was cute af and she asked me out on the very first day of high school. Ofc I said yes and there it goes. We really only lasted two weeks cuz

we were both immature af and her friend was a lowkey snitch lol but yeah that’s all. I was a raging petty bitch throughout freshman year but I stopped when I met Alex and we dated for almost two years but that’s a whole other story. It was just funny looking back at middle school and how I dated THREE people who dated each other. Oh I forgot to add that when me and tomato were together, pineapple and Nico dated. (Ya. Deadass.) it was hilarious LMAO anyways thanks for reading hope u got a laugh and if ur tomato pineapple or Nico reading this I hope u cringed for a fat minute cuz it made me die writing this.

#long post #personal #literally my first experience being bi #dating 3 ppl who dated each other #middle school right?

1 note · View note

10th-no-name-person · 6 years

Text

Happy New Year’s Eve!

Okay, here it goes. A really cheesy long post cause it’s the end of the year.

Ive been part of this community for 2 years now, but I never was active as I am now. I’m so grateful to be part of this lovely community!

@thebluehearted you literally saved my life, if it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t be writing this for you right here. We’ve know each other for a few months, and yet it feels like we’ve known each other for a lifetime. Thank you for being the bestests friend/ little bro in the whole world! I love you and I would give my life for you! 💚

@pumpkin-demon and @picapica916 you guys have made my days brighter! Your art and creativity just inspires me and makes me happy. I’m so happy I can call you guys my friends, I love you guys 💚

@septic-dr-schneep I know we barely talk, but you have played a big roll in my life for the past few months. Your writing, your creativity and you just being you reminded me how much I enjoyed writing and you helped me get back into it, so thank you 💚

@physically-fight-me and @that-ghost-in-the-corner you guys are so funny! I know we just started to get to know each other, but damn! I love you guys 💚 I hope our friendship grows even more in the coming years

@weirdmixofweirdness we be the shy squad! Hahaha I know we can get super shy but at the end of the day I know I can always count on you 💚

@pandakitty-10 i know we started talking, but hey! Don’t be shy to be pet of the community! We got your back! And we love you all the way! 💚

Im sorry if I forgot anyone, but tagged or not, I love you no matter what! Please be safe out there! I love you with all my heart and soul. I’ll always be here for you, okay? Be safe, have fun. I love you! Stay cool! And spread that PMA like butter! 💚

#jacksepticeye #jse community #PMA #positive mental attitude

17 notes · View notes

moonraccoon-exe · 6 years

Text

Regarding my asks

I’ve been meaning to make this post for the past 2 or so weeks, but now with this whole mess, I think it’s important before some of you guys leave for sure alksjda

I think some of you may have noticed that I stopped answering asks that are not personal; the prompts, the anon stories, the headcanons, etc. And it’s also been a while since I last made one of those “Did Coon receive my ask?” posts.

I wanted you guys to know that I haven’t forgotten, and that I do am going to answer to everything and everyone. I just...got drained.

Before taking a course I’m currently in, I only had business on monday evenings. Out of that, I spent literally all day, every day except for weekends, typing. Literally. L i t e r a l l y all day. Literally. Even with the course I’m taking, I’m still spending literally all my free time just typing. Be it fanfics, personal asks, tags, pms, or the prompt asks. And I do it because I love it, don’t get me wrong.

The problem is...I got drained. I have so much going on and I type so many thousand words a day, I got...exhausted. I have over 50 asks right now, many of which are multi-parts so it’s over 90 if I count one by one. I tried to answer as many as I could everyday, but for each I answered, another 3 made it in.

And don’t get me wrong, I love it. It’s your asks what make of this blog what it is. I rarely write anything out of your asks or make any posts out of them, so your asks are like 90% of this blog’s charm and success. I love it, I really love to read your brilliant ideas, prompts, your beautiful stories, and I love answering to them.

But do understand that for each 100 words you write to me, I write back to you 3000. Because you deserve it and because that’s how I want to reply. I’m not asking you stop sending me asks...I’m just explaining to you why I got so drained and exhausted.

All those words per day, writing every day, it wore me out mentally. I got to a point I couldn’t start typing the reply to an ask without stressing. That’s why at some point I went back to gaming instead of replying, because I literally used to spend all day writing and I got too exhausted.

So what I want to tell you is that I apologize for all the months I spent not answering. I apologize because I have asks that may be a year old now in my inbox. I apologize for being slow. And I want you to know, I’ll be back to it soon.

Let me answer some personal asks, fill the tags in the artworks I promised to fill, maybe finish the updates of my two giant fanfics, and recharge some battery. It sounds like a lot, hahaha, but I promise it’s not that much. I spend literally all free time here, so I’ll try to be quick.

Edit: I forgot to say, not to brag or anything but I also have 5 artworks dedicated to me (BLESSED? ME? DEFINITELY, MORE THAN I DESERVE KASLJDADG) so I’d like to add my usual 14-pages-long appreciation comments in at least 3 or so of them. Please be patient with me <3

[[In case any of the artists is reading this, yours can be either the coonie gifs, the chibi Ravus, the Iggy and the Beast, the one in inbox with a cute big animal buddy <3, or the raccoon on the moon! Just so you guys know I’m not ignoring, just waiting to add a real nice and long comment alksjdjkdal <33]]

But that’s that; I’ll be back at answering my prompt asks soon, and I will answer to everyone, everything, no matter how much time they have been in my inbox. I just...got exhausted and drained to the last drop, and I needed a break and rest my head from it. :)

I have brilliant JEWELS there, so I’ll be happy to be back, and I’m sorry for those of you who will miss the stories all these anons and non anons have shared with me <3

Thank you for the patience. Thank you for your asks. Thank you for understanding and letting me rest. And thank you for reading this.

Hope to see you soon with a Did Coon Receive My Ask so you can check what we’re having when I’m back to them!! ٩(◕‿◕｡)۶

Have a most SPLENDID day or night, raccoobos!! I love you! (ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ

#coontalks

13 notes · View notes

mommydragon-of-all · 6 years

Text

OC Interview Meme

This looks fun. Also some answers drastically differ depending on around what time this "interview” takes place. So i got thinking and since I was tagged by@sakurabunnie who’s getting to know my pre-inquisition Soren, i choose to time this before Inquisition. Then i was tagged by dear @hadiden-lavellan too, but by then i was halfway through his post, and hey why not, some looking back :) Thank you both!!!! :3333

For Soren (Lavellan):

1. What is your name?

“A lot of people have called me by a lot of names. You can call me Soren.”

2. What is your real name?

“It is actually Soren. Yep, just Soren. I lost my original belonging and i didnt take any of my families surnames. Not permanently nor in any way official.”

3. Do you know why you were called that?

“Oh well, my parents wanted a pair of short and strong names that ring together, even if they had to get a bit creative. Also, as i learned, a pair of names that can be lilted and growled equally well haha “

4. Are you single or taken?

“i am free like a bird. Does your nest have some extra space on a cold night by the way?”

5. Have any abilities or powers?

“Im a highly trained assassin, among … other things. If you ever get in trouble… *slides over a strange little object* flash this around the shady parts of any city. They will take care of the rest. But for your lives sake, do not try to lie”

6. Stop being a Mary Sue.

“ I dont think i ever used that alias… “

7. What’s your eye color?

“Oohhh you are welcome to gaze into them closer, yes ;) no low light excuses, they have their own, so just lean over… “

8. How about your hair color?

“ Oh yes that is harder to tell in different lights. Its dark red, like good wine or blood from the liver .”

9. Have you any family members?

“ I have tons. If you meant blood relation… other than my twin sister i have some distant family. Literally distant even, like few and far between, out in the world. Some of us exchange awesome birthday gifts some years though, regardless of the exact date. Who has time to time that. “

(Scattered by the wind, but firmly standing like the trees)

10. Oh? What about pets?

“ Sadly animals are deadly afraid of me. It takes just a sniff to run for dear life… Even predators… it takes a special blend of proud and crazy to befriend me it seems. I would kill for such treasures. Like that Hart i once fought for an apple in that deep forest and lately rode to far destinations… i think it starts to get even attached!!! If he sticks around im gonna call him Captain. But remember, Dont go close to him! For your dear life, please dont. He is easy to recognize. Big as a mountain and looks like “Oh, Shit”. “

(’Where to, Captain?’)

11. That’s cool I guess, now tell me about something you don’t like.

“ Those things are about to change. Or drop in numbers significantly in the world. Just wait. …as truly as i want to mean that, unfortunately some things never change. Like the darkness in people, festering hearts. There will always be things like betrayal, prejudice, hatred, discrimination, envy, greed, cruelty,... i could go on. People who mostly keep themselves above those shades of their nature are all worth to be protected.“

12. Do you have any hobbies/activities you like doing?

“ Oh there are so many awesome things in the world and so many exciting things to do! I cant even count them. Like there’s hunting dragons for one! Speaking of hunting, there is also treasure hunt and demon hunt and manhunt and wyvernhunt and countless others, the bigger and meaner the better! But then theres also MAGIC! Do you have any idea how awesome that is? Everything magic and everything it touched. Putting together and using magic objects for so many things! And spells??? Potions, lotions, weapons... And there are also PEOPLE! The most magical thing is the warm light in ones heart. And they are so various and unique! There are different languages and codes and symbols and oh the stories! And dance and music and pleasures and laughing and caring and helping and…. oh … haha… im sorry, are you awake? Please ask away. “

(’Ah, what a beautiful day!’)

13. Ever hurt anyone before?

“ I think you snoozed off and forgot about my profession already. :) “

14. Ever… killed anyone before?

“ Hahaha oh these sharp and pointy things and stuff arent for chopping and cooking vegetables either.”

15. What kind of animal are you?

“Pfffft i am my own species! Hehe! A unique hybrid i guess! But definitely a big animal, yes. Sis’ won that argument long ago, so there you have the answer. “

16. Name your worst habits.

“Hmm? What?” (*Muffs out with one of the interviewers -already leafed through-notebooks between his sharp teeth, booth on table...*) Hey! That is… how did you… *sigh*... nevermind

(exhibit 99: ‘”I’ll go straight there!”)

17. Do you look up to anyone at all?

“My sister, definitely. She is the best. She is indestructible in every way i swear! Gotta be the strongest person alive. She is also really cool. But hot. I mean explosive! Not that shes not hot, technically... she is my female version after all haha. And caring for me with great big sister love (*mumble*:even if i am like 5 minutes older), but dont spread that ;) Might harm her notoriety. I also look up to several of my tutors and many other people for many different reasons. People can be so many kinds of amazing.”

18. Gay, straight, or bisexual?

“You can not expect me to label my interests in a world full of so many differently beautiful people with warm hearts.”

19. Do you go to school?

“Yes. Life. 24/7. Got less intense since i learned how to survive and sustain myself, and grew a strong body to back up my needs and will, but there are always new things to learn and lessons you never asked for too. I had some actual teachers along the way too, but lately mostly i just teach myself what i dont just encounter by diving into new things. Which is not only fun by the way, you are bound to learn a few things. Then there are books, theories, researching, digging, honing instincts and reflexes, combining and refining techniques or theories, trial and error... Life is a bottomless school “

20. Do you ever want to marry and have kids one day?

“Wow, wow, you mean like.. babies? Sweet Fade, i wouldnt dare breathe their way, they are so fragile... little young PEOPLE, persons who arrived so recently and understand so little and cant even tell whats up just cry and i cant understand them, i understand every language but i can not understand babies for my life and ... and... thats terrifying! And do you have any idea how EASY it is to kill someone? And then there is that small bundle of vulnerability, my proximity could be lethal to it! And .... *sigh*... sorry just... It all would depend on that special person i might find who would want to keep me for life, for better or worse, and if they wanted kids... even if babies, i would be on board. I would do anything for that special someone. Even learn baby care... Bigger kids, well, i already have :D . In good care. If any of them were to be taken under my constant and indirect care, would depend on a lot of things. Right now they are much safer otherwise.”

21. Do you have any fanboys/fangirls?

“Most certainly ;D.But none of them know much about me, of course. With that comes a transformation of those feelings”

22. What are you most afraid of?

‘Im not afraid of ANYTHING!” *eyes instantly betraying* “Fine, fine, gotta be loss. Ironic, isnt it, for i have but what is on my person. Replaceable come and goes. Im mostly afraid of losses that arent even really “mine”, but others. Loved ones or even barely known ones loosing their lives or their light. Loosing my sister, myself, my heart... that is all i am. The only thing i cannot live without is my heart, i AM my heart, and loosing pieces of it or have it broken or freezing through a hole... I hate how selfish that is. But yeah. There you go. I still tend to leave pieces of it everywhere, and it only grows with that, funny how that works, but it also tends to get wounded on every turn. I fear the numbing cold. I fear the day when i cant hold it together and go on anymore.”

(from “When you are away”)

23. What do you usually wear?

“What you see is my whole wardrobe, hahah. But i shift and change to blend in from the dirt of Orzammar’s dust town to the shining halls of Orlesian palaces. Its fun. What i like to wear mostly are well covering clothes, that allow a great scale of mobility, but not baggy to catch on things. Made of high quality materials only. My clothes MUST be of great quality materials, more for comfort than durability. Heightened overall senses arent always fun. Oh and for outer wear i like leather, especially dragonskin stuff for light armor, and long boots are the only footwear i acknowledge, some with high heels, and a matching pair of long gloves from soft fine leather are necessary too. Long coats from mostly leather and all the necessary leather straps and harnesses and pouches and belt too of course. If it counts, all my current favorite necklaces with magical pendants and bracelets are a constant wear too. It also doesnt hurt if my clothes look great. But fine materials tailored to my body and my needs usually bring that effect without further touches.”

(*his gear gotta let his smooth ass move*)

24. Do you love someone?

“I love all good people. ...and some others”

25. When was the last time you wet yourself?

"Bahahahhahaa now thats some blunt question! It deserves to be answered truthfully. I wish i could say when i was a baby, but truth is i think it happened a few times during the wilder rides of intense poison training with blood magic assistance, but im not really sure, i was barely conscious through those parts from pain and all kinds of nasty sensations, i came to my senses naked and tucked in after them. I never do extreme limit pushing training alone. There were also times when i was subject to some blood spells and experiments unwilling too. I have some suspicious blurry memories that i have made all sorts of messes. Egh. Lets move on to more fun questions”

26. Well, it’s not over yet!

“Perfect!”

27. What class are you? (High class, middle class, low class)

“I live outside of such systems. But i took part in every class during my life, thanks to current families or goals.”

28. How many friends do you have?

“Plenty, but one cant have too many. Helping each other goes a long way. I tend to make some friends everywhere i go, but i have few close friends. The closest one is my sis’. She knows me more than i know myself, and she is always there for me, at any cost.”

29. What are your thoughts on pie?

“Pie? One of the most fun cakes. It was invented for throwing i swear!”

30. Favourite drink?

“Hmmmm... old, red wine, hot and seasoned, spiced with a nice kick of that special antivan poison blend. I dont recommend you trying it, but you dont know what you’re missing out.”

31. What’s your favourite place?

“Wherever i am welcome.”

(*one favorite place example. It is not Where, it is Who*)

32. Are you interested in someone?

“I am interested in everyone. Are you fishing for some special interest?”

33. What’s your bra cup size and/or how big is your willy?

“Hahahha oh you never disappoint! Well, it was a long time ago when i last i wore a bra, back when i could still pull off the young girl appearance, to get in paces and so on. I always made sure to have a proportional but quite evident bosom. Oh it was such fun, my long hair helped too, and i dished out that act spot on! Like that time in Val Royeaux, when the heads i turned waltzing in as part of a rich antivan court were spinning all around in frantic search in the chaos, while i walked right out as a male servant. Oh sorry, i got distracted. You also asked about my “willy” if i recall correctly. If you would like to measure it so badly we can discuss that later ;) “

34. Would you rather swim in the lake or the ocean?

“Hmmm.... whichever promises more sunk treasures and secrets. Some lakes hide quite the surprises let me tell you.”

(’Looks like a perfect place for some diving..’)

35. What’s your type?

“My type of what, exactly, dear? ;)”

36. Any fetishes?

“I am very flexible in many ways, let me tell you, in case you are planning to bend me to your will. And if id have some suggestions, well, let it remain a little mystery for now ;p”

37. Seme or uke? Top or Bottom? Dominant or Submissive?

“Depends. What would you like me to be?”

38. Camping or indoors?

“Nothing beats a warm bed and a well secured resting place. Especially with my... condition, and experiences”

39. Are you wanting the interview to end?

“Are you kidding me? You have such awkward, uncomfortable questions... Let me get a new round of drinks for us and lets do this till morning!” “What do you mean new round... when did this cup of hot wine get here? It has my name on it??? What the... I better go i think.”

40. Now it’s over!

“What? Oh come on, we just got to some really “embarrassing” parts! Talking about “embarrassing”, would you like to hear the story of my encounter with this qounari dreadnought captain and ended up on board to Ostwick? Maybe you can tell me some stories yourself too in exchange..” *puppy eyes+shining grin combo* “Well, im not exactly in a hurry...” “Excellent!” *shifts closer and pours more wine*

I tag @quizzikemen @pelle-lavellan @hadiden-lavellan @sakurabunnie @elalavella @nipuni and everyone who wants to do it! For those who already did this consider this a tag for another OC! Gotta love them all :D (if you feel like doing it. I always feel like reading it)

#finally i got around to finish this post #soren lavellan #oc meme #dragon age inquisition #dual wield assassin #male lavellan #screenshots

5 notes · View notes