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#look at this godforsaken mess that you made me; and that's the thing about illicit affairs (cedric&laena)
visxionaries · 5 months
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who: @fromspringandfire when and where: semi-flashback thread, following the reach court's arrival back to the reach where they immediately venture to oldtown. simonetta and garland hightower's funerals are due to happen in the morning, though the entirety of the court seemed to remain awake early hours into the night. what: cedric tells laena who is behind the attacks on two members of house hightower.
whilst she rarely spoke on matters regarding her lineage, the king of thorns and roses was wholly aware there was more than targaryen blood coursing through the veins of the woman he had chosen to keep as his companion and violate his marriage vows to be with. that amethyst eyes were only an indicator of what other blood ran through her, that which included that of the hightower; a flowers, was what she would be called here. a dragonseed, there; so many names for the same ultimate name at the end of the day.
it were no celebration they were partaking in within the hightower's great hall; dressed in black velvet, somber faces, faces of shock and of grief. because there had been a mighty secret kept beneath their very noses - or above it.
there was a reason he had chosen for her to remain beside him that night; along the same table as the other noble courtiers of the reach court, and he ignored the sight that momentarily crossed his queen's features upon seeing a set of silver hair sat in the row. never would she speak openly on it, not in this moment; though he knew it would be mentioned somewhere along the line. perhaps because he did not wish for the news to reach her by voice of any other but his own; whether this was her first time in oldtown he could not remember, and whilst she did not know of the woman in question, she was her blood.
she shared blood with an apparent madwoman who feared the colour green, who shook with fury at the tarnish she believed her grandson had brought to their house as though it had not been her and her generation first. and when the king rose toward the end of the night, once the formalities were finished and the goodnights were uttered, he stopped behind the chair of his mistress, placing a casual hand on her shoulder. she knew it would be him without him needing to say anything.
but he said something anyway, for this was not him wishing her goodnight here. he lowered his voice just enough for her to hear. "come, i'd rather you not stay here alone and listen to this false grief." he uttered. not yet; he was not blind and it were noted that laena had not yet established herself at court. perhaps she never truly would in the eyes of the others who looked upon her, as though sin were printed upon her forehead.
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they left the room, knowing there would be eyes upon them; a pair of important dark eyes in particular, who remained sat upon the high dias of the table, surrounded by her closest allies and courtiers. how startling it was that he felt no guilt to picture her face as he left with another woman at his side, and when the door closed behind them, an ocean gaze glanced over in her direction - noting the way in which a small breath seemed to come from her inner chest.
"how long were you wanting to leave for? you seemed finished with it all by the time the veal came out." a slightly amused smile crossed his features as he looked at her, as though it were the first time she could breathe all night.
he walked her to her own chambers, in a wing some corridors from his own; there were tyrell guards on either side of her door that nodded in his direction as he passed through, and the doors closed behind them. he kicked his boots off from his feet, though kept his doublet on as walked over to the window, briefly looking down at the courtyard, watching the starry sept in the far distance of the city. it felt like they were atop the world. "is it strange for you to be here?"
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ambitionbled · 9 months
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ISAAC TAG DROP.
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morgana-larkin · 5 months
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I love angst for some reason, but can you write a Melissa x reader breakup fic? Where reader is in their mid 20’s and Melissa is obviously wayyy older than her. Melissa realized that they’re both heading in different paths in life and tries to gently breakup with reader, but calls her all the pet names like “kid/kiddo, young one, little bunny, etc” (this is taken from Taylor Swift’s ‘Illicit Affairs’ where she’s going “don’t call me kid, don’t call me baby, look at this godforsaken mess that you’ve made me…”)
Maybe a part two if you’re feeling up to it, with gentle smut as reader and Melissa get back together and make love again? 👀
Oh I’m definitely making a part two to this, I mean I can’t leave things with Melissa on a sad note. So I went with the nicknames hon and kid. I did ended listening to the Taylor Swift song and based some of the things off of the song. And I just gotta say that I procrastinated on doing this for 4 days straight as it hit too close to home. I called off my engagement 3 months ago to someone 12 years older than me because we were heading down different paths in life. Anyway, not edited in the slightest and I hope you like it!
On another note: still taking prompts peeps!
Part 2
Don’t Call Me That
Warnings: Angst and no comfort, no happy ending, may break your heart like it did for me
Words: 2.25k
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You and Melissa are cuddling on the couch watching real housewives. Melissa found out you’ve never seen it so of course she had to show you. The two of you have been together for about 8 months now and never been happier.
Well, you have never been happier. Melissa was happy, but she still has so much doubt on whether or not she should have gotten with someone so much younger than her. Especially when you made comments on what you want to do with your life.
“I hope to get married someday.” You said once. “Maybe we can have kids together.” You said another time. “We should go out to a bar or a club together sometime.” You said one time. Melissa just looked at you and smiled each time but didn’t reply. Those thoughts swirl around in Melissa’s head until one day she couldn’t ignore them, you both wanted different things and she couldn’t let this relationship go on even more.
“Hey hon, can we talk?” She says to you when she visits you at your place on Saturday.
“Alright, sure.” You said, none the wiser. You and Melissa go on your couch and you face her with a smile. Melissa wishes you weren’t smiling as it makes it harder knowing that she’ll be that reason for that smile to drop.
“I don’t think this is working out anymore.” She starts and you look at her confused.
“What do you mean?” You ask and you frown.
“I mean this.” She says and gestures between you both. “Our relationship, I think we should end it.”
“Why?” You ask, concerned.
“Because we want different things in life hon. I don’t want to get married again, I wanted kids before but not anymore, and I don’t want to go to clubs if I don’t have too. But you’re young, you should have things you want and you should do it.” She tells you and you look down at your lap. She really wants to comfort you but knows she can’t.
“So that’s it? We’re over, just like that? I have no say in this?” You ask her and she looks guilty.
“I’m afraid so hon.” She says and you snap you head up at her.
“Don’t call me that if you’re gonna break up with me.” You snap and that catches her off guard. She knows you might be upset but didn’t think you’d snap at her, but she doesn’t blame you.
“I’m sorry y/n.” She tells you.
“Please leave.” You say and she nods defeatedly. She gets up and walks to the door and opens it. Before she leaves, she glances at you.
“I really am sorry.” She says and leaves. As soon as she closes the door, you get up and lock it, then you put your back on the door and slide down while crying.
On Monday you walked in the doors of Abbott and went to the break room as usual. Only this time instead of saying hi to Melissa when you pass her, you just walked right by her to the fridge.
“Hi hon.” Melissa says to you.
“Don’t call me that.” You say as you put your lunch in the fridge. Everyone turns their attention to you and Melissa as they knew you were dating. “My name is y/n.” You say to her and go to make a coffee.
“I know what your name is.” She tells you as you pour the coffee into your mug.
“Then I suggest you use it.” You tell her and walk out.
Melissa sighs and leans back into her seat.
“Trouble in paradise?” Barb asks Melissa.
“If trouble you mean broken up then yes.” Melissa says and everyone gasps.
“Omg what happened?” Janine asks.
“None of youse businesses.” She tells them and walks out. Everyone turns to Barb for answers.
“Don’t look at me, the only thing I know is Melissa broke up with y/n if their emotions are anything to go by.” Barb tells them.
Melissa tries to talk to you for the rest of the day when she gets an opportunity but you keep shutting her down.
She keeps trying every day for 2 weeks until she had enough. She got Mr Johnson to watch over her class while she goes to talk to you during your prep period.
She knocks on your door and walks in after you call out a ‘come in’ to whoever was there. When you look up you see the person you least expected, mostly because she has a class right now.
“What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be teaching?” You tell her as she closes your door.
“Mr Johnson is watching them until I get back. I need to talk to you hon.”
“I keep telling you not to call me that! And the last time we talked, you broke up with me so I don’t really want to talk to you.” You told her and she sighs. You get up and go to bring a stack of papers to the back of the classroom.
“I know but I’ve been trying to at least be friends with you like we were before we started dating because I like our friendship.” She tells you as she follows you to the back and you whip around to face her.
“Friends? You think I would want to be friends with you? Melissa, do I need to remind you that you broke up with me and didn’t even bother talking about it with me? You just made the decision on your own.” You grit out.
“It was the best decision.”
“For who exactly? Cause it sure wasn’t the best for me.” You tell her and she looks at you.
“It was for you. I made it for you so you can have the life you want. I can’t give you everything! So I let you go so you could! Believe me when I tell you that I didn’t want to break up with you! You are the best damn thing to happen to me and it broke me to let you go!” She tells you and you gasp.
“That’s the reason?!? You. Are. An. Idiot Schemmenti! Just because I may have thought about certain things doesn’t mean it’s set in stone. I’m 25 and I’m not certain about what I want to do in life.”
“See that right there is what I’m talking about. You have no idea what you want cause your life has just begun, while mine, well I’m 55, I’m going to retire in 10 years hopefully. My life is almost over.” She tells you frantically and at that Barb comes in.
“Girls, can you quiet down. It’s hard enough to teach 5 year olds how to read the alphabet as it is. It’s even harder with your yelling.” She tells you both and you look at Melissa.
“What I knew I wanted in life was you. But I guess I was wrong. You should get back to your class.” You tell her and you leave to go print something. “Sorry Barb.” You tell her as you pass her by.
Barb looks at Melissa who has a couple tears rolling down her cheeks. “Sweetheart, what were you trying to accomplish here?” She asks her and Melissa lets a sob escape.
“I was trying to be friends with her again.” She tells her.
“Melissa, you just broke up with her out of the blue. At least for her it was out of the blue. You have to give it time before she might consider being your friend again.” Barb tells her and Melissa nods.
“I know, I just, I miss her.”
“Listen I have to go back to my classroom and you have to go back to yours but how about you come to my classroom at lunch and we can talk then.” Barb suggests and Melissa wipes her tears away.
“Ok.” She says with a nod and then leaves back to her classroom.
2 months go by and Melissa has stopped any interaction with you. You still know she looks and stares at you but never talks to you.
Melissa can’t help it whenever she sees you, she never talks to you even though she wants to, she just stares at you. Her heart breaks every time she sees you.
10 weeks after she breaks up with you, your both in the break room along with everyone else. You’re talking to the trio and they ask about your weekend plans and you mention you have a date. Melissa whips her head up from looking at her phone and her jaw drops and eyes got watery.
You may not be able to see her face but you saw her whip her head up. You also see Barb looking at her sympathetically which means she must look sad right now.
You tell them your contemplating on whether or not you should go, you think you shouldn’t but Janine and Gregory tell you to go and Jacob tells you no. You go over to Barb for the tie breaker and you show her a picture of the girl, Melissa also sees the picture of her and she realises that you’re going out with someone around her age.
Barb tells you it’s your choice and that’s when Melissa pipes up. “Isn’t she too old for you kid?” She asks you while taking a bite of her pasta.
You glare at her and scoff. “I think that’s for me to decide, cause I do have a say in some things.” You tell her and she looks down guiltily.
On Monday morning you walk in the break room and the trio asks you how your date went.
“It was alright. We’re going out again this Saturday.” You tell them and you hear Melissa scoff. “Something you want to say Melissa?” You ask her and she turns around in her chair.
“It doesn’t seem you’re interested in her since you said it was alright.” She tells you.
“Well it was my first date with her and I haven’t had a first date in a year.” You say and she stands up, grabs her things and walks out. You turn back to the trio and continue the conversation. Barb follows Melissa out to make sure she’s not destroying anything or about too.
The next Monday you’re talking to the trio about your second date and you tell them that you’re not going to see her again as you’re not interested in her. You don’t see it but Melissa smiles. You don’t but Barb sure does and rolls her eyes at her.
It’s been 3 months since the break up now and you stop by quickly at Melissa’s to get a few things she recently found that’s yours. In reality, Melissa found them 3 months ago and hid them when you came to get your things so she would have a few reminders of yours but now she wants an excuse to talk to you.
The box of your things is on the coffee table and Melissa is sitting on the arm of the couch when you walk in. Melissa told you that she’ll leave the door unlocked for you.
“Are those the things?” You tell her and nod your head to the box and she nods at you.
“Ya, it is.” She tells you and you don’t really move, she sees you looking around. You usually went to her place about 3 times a week to hang out with her after school and she would make dinner for you two.
“How are you kid?” She asks you and you look at her.
“I thought I’ve told you to stop with the nicknames and use my actual name.”
“You have, but I like using nicknames for you.” Is all she says.
“Why?”
“Because I always have, I’ve rarely called you by your actual name. It feels wrong to call you by your actual name.”
“Well you might want to work on how to make it sound right.” You tell her and walk over to grab the box and she grabs your wrist and you gasp.
“You never answered me when I asked how you were.” She tells you.
“You really want to know how I am?” You ask and she nods. “I’m broken.” You told her and her eyes look upset. “You broke up with me and now I’m broken and a mess. I chose not to go on a third date because all I thought about on the two dates was you.” You tell her and she lets go of you but you make no attempt to move. You want to challenge her to something to see what she really thinks and you grab the back of her head and you kiss her. She’s stunned for a second but then she automatically kisses you back but then you pull back 3 seconds later and she looks at you shocked. “You can’t tell me that that doesn’t feel right. I may not know much about what I want in life but I know I wanted to spend it with you. I’m aware of the age gap but it never made a difference to me because I love you. I thought you loved me.” You tell her then you grab the box and leave.
As soon as you close the door, Melissa falls down on the couch and starts crying. “I’m so sorry y/n.” She sobs out. “I do still love you.”
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babydollmarauders · 1 year
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ILLICIT AFFAIRS — QUINN HUGHES
quinn hughes x fem!reader
summary: in which y/n is Quinn’s little secret.
specific lyrics: “what started in beautiful rooms; ends with meetings in parking lots” and “you wanna scream, don't call me ‘kid’, don't call me ‘baby’, look at this godforsaken mess that you made me” and “look at this idiotic fool that you made me” and “for you, i would ruin myself, a million little times”
warnings: cheating, 18+ content in the middle, ANGST!
notes: you will not think highly of the Quinn in this fic. i know i’m supposed to be writing the Speak Now Fic List— bear with me. this was written as a way to get out of my writers block.
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i can always stop.
i can.
i have freewill to refuse his advances.
i think.
but the stolen stares, the weight of his body against mine, the feeling that comes with knowing he wants me in the way i’ve longed for him to want me, it’s an addiction.
a drug that i just can’t quit, despite how dirty and used i feel afterwards. despite having to sneak away with my hood up and my head down.
the high of being his, just for a moment, outweighs the inevitable self-criticism in the aftermath.
because that’s the thing about illicit affairs; they make you hate yourself a million little times.
**
i’ve barely just climbed off of him, my back skimming the mattress, before he’s already standing from my bed.
my eyes follow his movements, the fluidity and grace of flowing through steps he’s done a million times before.
his dress shirt buttoned back on, his suit pants following, his tie lazily swung around his neck and his suit jacket pulled over to complete the look.
while i’m tangled in my thin sheet, still recovering, he’s fixing his hair in the mirror above my dresser and letting his own eyes graze his neck for marks. finding none, as i know better than to make myself known on his skin.
never seen, never heard, always secret. no marks, never wear perfume nor lipstick, never leave any trace of existence. a ghost above all else.
his eyes lock with mine in the mirror, catching my longing stare with his indifferent one.
“i’ve gotta go. you watching the game?” he knows the answer, he always knows.
“yeah, Quinny, i’ll be watching.” my cheeks flush. “i always do.”
“good. i’ll try and score a goal for you.” he winks in the reflection, my heartbeat picking up as it does every time. “bye, baby.”
there’s no goodbye kisses, no whispered sweet nothings, just quirked lips and the sound of my bedroom door shutting behind him.
it’s not long until the bliss wears off, leaving me with nothing but self-depreciating thoughts. no one to blame but myself.
he has a girlfriend.
one who isn’t you.
aren’t you ashamed?
aren’t you disgusted with yourself?
don’t you deserve better?
although, maybe not.
my phone buzzes on the nightstand beside me, an incoming call from my best friend, and despite feeling like an idiotic fool and a betrayal of my own morality, i accept the call.
“hey, Lukey!” false cheer drips from my tongue, but just like every other time, i know he won’t know the difference. “to what do i owe the pleasure of your call?”
“hey, y/n/n!” Luke’s chuckle crackles over the speaker of my phone. “i just wanted to talk, i’ve been missing you extra the past few days. i want my movie buddy.”
“i miss you too, Lukey.”
god, if only he knew how badly i’ve fucked up without him to lead me the right way.
“don’t you have Jack now to watch movies with?” i question, shaking off the urge to confess my sins. to ask for his forgiveness and plead for him to talk some sense into my love-riddled mind.
“it’s not the same. he doesn’t pay attention to the little details as well as we do.” i can hear his pout through the phone, making me giggle.
“just one more month, then we’ll have the whole summer to watch as many movies as we want.” i remind him.
“yeah, one more month.” he replies, solemnly. “anyways, UBC is still treating you good, right? no chance you’d wanna transfer to, i don’t know, Rutgers or Princeton?”
i chuckle at his lame attempt at convincing me to leave my dream school.
“i’m sorry, moose; but UBC is still where my heart lies.” oh, if only he knew just what, or rather who, the reason was for that.
“yeah, alright. it was worth a shot.” he sighs. “and Quinny’s taking good care of you, right?”
i my throat closes up and i choke on the air in my lungs.
“what?” i ask him, sitting up in my bed and pulling the sheet closer to my body.
“Quinn.” he repeats. “he promised he’d look after you. has he?”
“oh, yeah. yeah, he’s been checking in on me. making sure i’m okay.” i guess that’s one way to put what we’ve been doing.
“good. i’d have to kill him if he let you get hurt.”
**
my feet have barely touched the ground outside of my car before the lake house door is flung open. my best friend bounds out of the house, his middle brother hot on his trail, attempting to speak to him about something long forgotten by Luke.
“YOU’RE HERE!” Luke’s arms are flung around my waist, hoisting me up in the air and spinning me around.
the melody of my laugh mingles in the air as my arms wrap around his neck.
“Lukey, put me down, i already feel sorta car sick! it was a very long drive.” despite the fact that my words are true, i can’t wipe the smile off my face from being reunited with my best friend.
my feet finally fall flat on the ground as Luke backs up to look at my face, his fingers grazing all over it, more specifically the under eye bags from stress and sleepless nights.
“i thought you said you were doing great? what are these?! they’re new!”
his concern is heartwarming but before i can respond, i notice all the people behind him on the lake house porch. Jack, their friends, and most importantly, Quinn. the real reason for my newly spotted dark circles.
i muster up a chuckle, rolling my eyes.
“they’re designer. they come with the UBC tuition.” i stress, hoping he buys the ‘i’ve just been working myself to the bone with schoolwork’ excuse.
“checks out. you’ve always been my little nerd.” he grins, slinging an arm around my shoulder and turning towards the porch. “aren’t you guys gonna come say hi?”
“didn’t wanna impose on your moment.” Jack jokes, hopping down the porch steps to pull me from Luke’s grasp and into a hug.
“hey, bubby. welcome back.” he smiles, ruffling my hair mid hug. i step on his foot in retaliation, making him push me back so he could check on his white sneakers.
“it’s good to be back, bubba.” i grin as he rolls his eyes.
“hey kid, long time no see.” my head snaps over to look at Quinn, who smirks at me with a knowing look.
we saw each other three days ago, the day before he flew out to Michigan.
“hey, Quinny.” a bashful smile takes over my lips and my heart beats overtime, the natural reaction when i’m in his vicinity.
“no.” Luke speaks, pulling me into his chest protectively. “you don’t get to ‘hi’ her. you got her all year. this is my turn.”
his words make me blush and i pat his chest.
“don’t worry Lukey, this is our time.” i reassure him. “i but i would like to go inside now.”
“yeah, right.” he nods, letting me push away from him. the guys all head back into the house, leaving me to open my trunk and grab my bag.
a strong hand encases mine on the handle of my suitcase, soft lips i know all too well grazing the shell of my ear.
“i hope Luke doesn’t mind sharing.” Quinn leaves me frozen behind him, taking my bag and my breath with him.
beats of time pass before i follow suit, closing my trunk and locking my car before jogging up the porch steps and into the house.
this will be one hell of a summer. literally.
**
“i’m going for a run.”
my words are spoken through Luke’s shut bedroom door, followed by the opening of said door.
“a run?” he asks me, sleep still prominent in his face from his mid-afternoon nap. “since when do you run?”
“i started running when i was in Vancouver. i thought i told you that?” the lie is like a sour candy on my tongue, spit out quickly as though another second of these words in my mouth would make me sick.
“oh, okay. how long will you be gone? i’ll have the movie set up for when you get back.”
“i shouldn’t be too long. like an hour at most.” i tell him, tightening my ponytail.
“you’ll actually probably be all sweaty when you get back. just wake me back up when you get back and i’ll get the movie ready while you shower.”
sweaty and flushed, for sure.
“okay.”
*
“Quinn, please.” my heavy pants turn to pleads, begging Quinn to get me over the edge. his hands hold mine behind my back as i grind my hips against his.
unable to risk being caught at the lake house, our rendezvous settings have downgraded from my bedroom back in vancouver. to the parking lot of a field, only a 15 minute walk from the house.
“you want me to make you come?” his words cause a shiver down my spine, my head nodding at rapid speed. “use your words, baby. say it.”
“i want you to make me come.” i beg. that’s all it takes for him to flip us over, my body laid across his back seat as he thrusts into me, hooking one of my legs over his shoulder.
“fuck, you’re so wet baby. feel so good squeezing my cock.” i clench around him, his dirty whispers echoing in my head as the coil in my stomach tightens. he angles his hips, thrusting up into the spot that makes my eyes roll back.
“right there.” i gasp, my hands coming up to grip his shoulders. i’m careful not to dig my nails into his skin. careful to never leave any sort of marks. his right hand trails down my body, settling on my stomach.
“right there?” he teases, repeating his previous move, all while pushing one hand down on my stomach. my legs shake, and i clench around him one final time before the pressure relieves and i achieve my orgasm.
Quinn thrusts a few more times, riding me through my high and chasing his before his hips stutter and he pulls out, painting my stomach with his release.
the glass windows are fogged, the car hot and reeking of sex, the only sound being our heavy breathing as we gather ourselves again.
my eyes flutter, my energy spent.
“hey, baby.” Quinn’s hand snakes onto my thigh, shaking it slightly. “you should go. Luke is probably waiting for you.”
i nod. i know he’s right, but it still stings, being dismissed so quickly.
i wipe my stomach with a napkin from his glovebox before slipping my biker shorts back on and pulling my tank top back over my head.
“i’ll see you at the house.” he bids me goodbye, as i slip out of his car, starting my walk back to the house.
aren’t you sick of this?
don’t you feel guilty for lying to your best friend?
for betraying him like this?
don’t you think you can do better?
that you deserve better than clandestine meetings?
than being someone’s ‘other woman’?
than being tossed aside the second he’s done with you?
i’m done.
*
“alright, you ready?” Luke asks, plopping down on the couch cushion beside me, a bowl of popcorn clutched in his hand.
“yeah, press play, moose.” Luke is just about to hit play on the netflix movie when the front door swings open. Quinn steps into the house, shutting the door before noticing us on the couch.
“hey.” he gives us a nod, walking towards the stairs. “oh, Olivia is flying in tomorrow morning.”
my heart stops, my muscles tensing.
Olivia.
Quinn’s girlfriend.
the one we’ve been sneaking around for four months.
“oh cool, what time?” Luke is oblivious to my silent panic.
“six a.m, so i’m heading to sleep. night, Luke. night, kid.”
there it is again. that stupid nickname. ‘kid’.
Quinn heads up the stairs and i hear the faint sound of his bedroom door shutting.
my head snaps over to Luke.
“hey, i gotta go get something from my room, i’ll be right back.” i pat his leg before rising from my seat, making my way towards the stairs.
“oh, okay.” he nods, getting on his phone as i walk up the stairs.
i come to a stop outside of Quinn’s door, debating knocking before i decide not to, in order to not raise suspicion from Luke.
i swing the door open, slipping in before quickly shutting it behind me.
Quinn sits on the foot of his bed, head rising from looking at his phone. his brows furrow before he raises one in questioning.
“didn’t get enough of me earlier?” he teases. “aren’t you and Luke watching a movie? i don’t think we can have a quickie right now-”
“we’re done.” his lips snap shut, whether in shock, or disbelief, or just plain speechlessness, i’m not sure. but he’s silent, so i continue. “no more meetings. no more.”
my heart aches in my chest, my throat getting tighter and tears bubble up in my eyes.
i thought it would be easy to stop.
i used to tell myself i could do it whenever i wanted. but now, i know it’s not true.
there was no ‘last time’, only this afternoon. no soft goodbyes. i’ll be stuck seeing him for the rest of my life. he’s a mistake that i became all too comfortable with. with him, i let my morals wash away like a drawing in sand. but i was done hating myself, thinking so low of myself for my forbidden actions.
he chuckles as if i told him a joke, as if i didn’t just tell him we were over. standing from the bed and prowling towards me, his hand raises to cup my cheek.
“what are you talking about, baby?”
it’s always ‘baby’ in secret. ‘kid’ while in company. he makes me feel so stupid, like i’m a child; naive and small.
“don’t call me ‘baby’.” i swat his hand away from my cheek. “and don’t call me ‘kid’, either. do you not know my name?
“do you not know the name of the girl you’ve been fucking in secret for the past four months? that you’ve known since you were ten?”
his nostrils flare, stepping back as though i’ve slapped him.
“i know your name, y/n.” his words drip with venom, his lips press together into a straight line. “they’re just nicknames.”
“they’re cruel.” i spit. “you know what you’re doing. i’ve made myself available to you for too long. i’ve let you use me and throw me to the side as if i’m nothing. i’ve become something i never would’ve imagined i would be-”
“y/n-”
“no! this is my turn to talk. look at this godforsaken mess that you made me. i’m actively lying to my best friend, your brother. i’ve become the ‘other woman’. a title i would’ve smacked myself for, just six months ago. i’ve lost my sense of morality. i’ve become someone that i don’t even recognize; because of you. so, i’m done.
“i will not be your secret anymore. i deserve more. i deserve better than someone who keeps me hidden. who dismisses me mere minutes after using my body.”
tear tracks stain my cheeks, my face feels tighter under the salty liquid and i quickly wipe them away.
“you’re right.” my lips part slightly, my gaze fixating on the man in front of me.
he seems genuine. his eyes glistening with pity and an unrecognizable emotion.
“i’m sorry. you deserve better.” he tells me, nodding his head solemnly.
“i do.” i reply. “and i’ve been rejecting everyone that is interested because i’ve been hoping and praying to any higher power that you would love me the way that i’ve loved you since i was sixteen, but that’s not gonna happen, is it?”
he shakes his head ‘no’ and i can’t even hold it against him, because at least he’s finally being honest with me.
i bite my lower lip, nodding dejectedly and gripping the doorknob behind me.
“for you, i’ve ruined myself a million times.”
i slip out the door, padding back down the stairs and leaving the man i love, and our illicit affairs behind me.
Luke’s head rises when i return, his eyebrow raised and his lips parted, surely ready to question what took me so long. but with one glance at my tear stained face and bloodshot eyes, his mouth closes, his arms opening instead.
i drop onto the couch, burying my face into his neck. his arms wrap around me tightly, one hand holding the back of my head as the other rubs my back.
“i know.” he whispers. “it’s okay. i know.”
his words are mumbled against the shell of my ear and the emotion with which their spoken confirms that he knew what i’d been doing. they only succeed in making me feel even more guilty. all this time, i thought i’d been doing a pretty good job of hiding our meetings this summer, but my best friend is smart, catching on a lot more than i realized.
“i’m so sorry, Lukey.” i sob, my apology muffled by his skin.
“it’s okay. and i promise, it’ll be okay, y/n/n. i’ve got you.”
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favourite parts of Illicit Affairs?
Such a good question! My favourite part is: Make sure nobody sees you leave / Hood over your head / Keep your eyes down / Tell your friends you're out for a run / You'll be flushed when you return / Take the road less traveled by / Tell yourself you can always stop / What started in beautiful rooms / Ends with meetings in parking lots / And that's the thing about illicit affairs / And clandestine meetings / And longing stares / It's born from just one single glance / But it dies and it dies and it dies … a million little times / Leave the perfume on the shelf / That you picked out just for him / So you leave no trace behind / Like you don't even exist / Take the words for what they are / A dwindling, mercurial high / A drug that only worked / The first few hundred times / And that's the thing about illicit affairs / And clandestine meetings / And stolen stares / They show their truth one single time / But they lie and they lie and they lie … a million little times / And you wanna scream / Don't call me "kid" / Don't call me "baby" / Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me / You showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else / Don't call me "kid" / Don't call me "baby" / Look at this idiotic fool that you made me / You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else / And you know damn well / For you I would ruin myself … a million little times
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taylor-swift-bracket · 5 months
Text
🎇Please reblog!🎇
Notable bridges
(Under the cut)
1989 (Taylor’s Version)
Out of the woods
Remember when you hit the brakes too soon?
Twenty stitches in the hospital room
When you started crying, baby, I did too
But when the sun came up, I was looking at you
Remember when we couldn't take the heat?
I walked out, I said, "I'm setting you free"
But the monsters turned out to be just trees
When the sun came up, you were looking at me
You were looking at me, oh
You were looking at me
(Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet?)
(Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods?)
I remember
(Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet?)
(Are we in the clear yet, in the clear yet? Good)
Oh, I remember
Wildest Dreams
You'll see me in hindsight
Tangled up with you all night
Burnin' it down
Someday, when you leave me
I bet these memories
Follow you around
You'll see me in hindsight
Tangled up with you all night
Burnin' (Burnin') it (It) down (Down)
Someday, when you leave me
I bet these memories
Follow (Follow) you (You) around
(Follow you around)
Is It Over Now?
And did you think I didn't see you?
There were flashin' lights
At least I had the decency
To keep my nights out of sight
Only rumors 'bout my hips and thighs
And my whispered sighs
Oh, Lord, I think about jumpin'
Off of very tall somethings
Just to see you come runnin'
And say the one thing I've been wanting, but no
Clean
Ten months sober, I must admit
Just because you're clean, don't mean you don't miss it
Ten months older, I won't give in
Now that I'm clean, I'm never gonna risk it
The drought was the very worst, ah-ah, ah-ah
When the flowers that we'd grown together died of thirst (Oh)
Wonderland
I reached for you, but you were gone
I knew I had to go back home
You searched the world for somethin' else
To make you feel like what we had
And in the end, in Wonderland, we both went mad
Oh
youtube
folklore
Illicit affairs
And you wanna scream
Don't call me "kid," don't call me "baby"
Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me
You showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else
Don't call me "kid," don't call me "baby"
Look at this idiotic fool that you made me
You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else
the last great american dynasty
They say she was seen on occasion
Pacing the rocks, staring out at the midnight sea
And in a feud with her neighbor
She stole his dog and dyed it key lime green
Fifty years is a long time
Holiday House sat quietly on that beach
Free of women with madness, their men and bad habits
And then it was bought by me
hoax
You know I left a part of me back in New York
You knew the hero died so what's the movie for?
You knew it still hurts underneath my scars
From when they pulled me apart
You knew the password so I let you in the door
You knew you won so what's the point of keeping score?
You knew it still hurts underneath my scars
From when they pulled me apart
But what you did was just as dark
(Ah, ah, ah)
Darling, this was just as hard
As when they pulled me apart
my tears ricochet
And I can go anywhere I want
Anywhere I want, just not home
And you can aim for my heart, go for blood
But you would still miss me in your bones
And I still talk to you (When I'm screaming at the sky)
And when you can't sleep at night (You hear my stolen lullabies)
august
Back when we were still changin' for the better
Wanting was enough
For me, it was enough
To live for the hope of it all
Cancel plans just in case you'd call
And say, "Meet me behind the mall"
So much for summer love and saying "us"
'Cause you weren't mine to lose
You weren't mine to lose, no
youtube
evermore
champagne problems
Your Midas touch on the Chevy door
November flush and your flannel cure
"This dorm was once a madhouse"
I made a joke, "Well, it's made for me"
How evergreen, our group of friends
Don't think we'll say that word again
And soon they'll have the nerve to deck the halls
That we once walked through
One for the money, two for the show
I never was ready so I watch you go
Sometimes you just don't know the answer
'Til someone's on their knees and asks you
"She would've made such a lovely bride
What a shame she's f*cked in the head," they said
But you'll find the real thing instead
She'll patch up your tapestry that I shred
ivy
So yeah, it's a fire
It's a violent blaze in the dark
And you started it
You started it
So yeah, it's a war
It's the fiercest fight of my life
And you started it
You started it
tolerate it
While you were out buildin' other worlds, where was I?
Where's that man who'd throw blankets over my barbed wire?
I made you my temple, my mural, my sky
Now I'm beggin' for footnotes in the story of your life
Drawin' hearts in the byline
Always takin' up too much space or time
You assume I'm fine, but what would you do if I
marjorie
The autumn chill that wakes me up
You loved the amber skies so much
Long limbs and frozen swims
You'd always go past where our feet could touch
And I complained the whole way there
The car ride back and up the stairs
I should've asked you questions
I should've asked you how to be
Asked you to write it down for me
Should've kept every grocery store receipt
'Cause every scrap of you would be taken from me
Watched as you signed your name Marjorie
All your closets of backlogged dreams
And how you left them all to me
Right where you left me
Did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen?
Time went on for everybody else, she won't know it
She's still twenty-three inside her fantasy
How it was supposed to be
Did you hear about the girl who lives in delusion?
Breakups happen every day, you don't have to lose it
She's still twenty-three inside her fantasy
And you're sitting in front of me
youtube
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illicit affairs
hangman x reader
warnings: angst and cheating.
don’t call me “kid”
don’t call me “baby”
look at this godforsaken mess that you made me
“I can’t do this anymore, Jake.” You said softly as he began to gather his clothes.
His movements slowed down as he processed the words that you just spoke, “What?”
You looked down at your hands, unable to meet his gaze, “I can’t do this. This has to be the last time.”
“Baby-“
You cut him off quickly, “Don’t. Do not call me that.”
Jake set his shirt down and walked towards the side of your bed, “(Y/n), you know that I care about you and-“
“You care about Maddie more.” Saying his girlfriend’s name nearly made you sick. You hated yourself for what you were doing. You never thought you’d be the other woman.
You felt like a mess.
Jake sighed, “Our relationship is complicated. You know that.”
“I’m making things less complicated for you, Jake. I don’t want to see you anymore.” The words hurt coming from your mouth but you meant them. You couldn’t keep living like this. It was seriously tearing you apart.
You loved Jake. You loved him even though he wasn’t yours.
He reached out and cupped your cheek lightly with his hand. You allowed him to because you knew it was the last time he would tough you so tenderly. “(Y/n), please don’t do this.”
“You think I want you to walk out of those doors and never see you again? No, I don’t. But I have to because I can’t keep living like this. My heart is shattered into pieces from what we’ve done. I feel bad for myself and then I hate myself because I’m not the victim here. I’m the one that’s causing harm unknowingly. I’m the one that’s also making your decision for you.”
“What do you mean?” He wondered.
“You would’ve never made the decision to choose and I’ve never forced you but I have to chose myself right now. I need to put me first before I completely self destruct. This isn’t healthy for me. This isn’t healthy for anyone.”
You watched as tears formed in his eyes. You didn’t doubt that he had feelings for you. You knew that he cared but this wasn’t the way things were supposed to go. He had a loving girlfriend that loved him.
You shouldn’t be in the equation anymore.
“(Y/n), I love you.” Jake said softly, almost whispering.
“I know you do.” The tears were flowing as well.
He leaned forward and you thought he was going to kiss you but instead he pressed his lips against your forehead. He lingered there and you felt his tears fall onto the top of your head.
“I don’t want to say goodbye to you.”
“It’s for the best.” You felt the pain right now but you knew that those words were true. You seriously needed to time to heal and work of forgiving yourself for doing such a horrible thing.
“I really hope this isn’t the last time I see you.” Jake said.
You didn’t know how to respond to him so you sat there as he gathered the rest of his things. He walked to your bedroom door and looked back at you.
“Take care of yourself, Jake.”
He didn’t answer you as he walked out and shut the door behind him. You knew in your heart that it was the last time you’d ever see him.
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darkcrowprincess · 5 months
Text
Percico illicit affairs by Taylor Swift:
And that's the thing about illicit affairs And clandestine meetings and longing stares It's born from just one single glance But it dies, and it dies, and it dies A million little times
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And that's the thing about illicit affairs And clandestine meetings and stolen stares They show their truth one single time But they lie, and they lie, and they lie A million little times
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And you wanna scream Don't call me "kid" Don't call me "baby" Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me You showed me colors You know I can't see with anyone else
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Don't call me "kid" Don't call me "baby" Look at this idiotic fool that you made me You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else
And you know damn well For you, I would ruin myself A million little times
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iamfitzwilliamdarcy · 5 months
Text
I've been really obsessed with "Down Bad" as a song in the sequence of songs about love affairs changing a person--indeed, wounding a person-- leaving an indelible mark if you will-- and it's interesting in context of her other songs that explore this. (Putting under a readmore because it's really just such a lyric dump):
She sings in "Down Bad":
Did you really beam me up In a cloud of sparkling dust Just to do experiments on? Tell me I was the chosen one Showed me that this world is bigger than us Then sent me back where I came from
He takes her, changes her, then abandons her! The other lyrics it tied me to were in "Ilicit Affairs" and "Would've, Should've, Could've"
Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me You showed me colors You know I can't see with anyone else ... You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else
---
And if you never saved me from boredom I could've gone on as I was But, Lord, you made me feel important And then you tried to erase us
I think this line is interesting too from "Down Bad" and also reminds me of "Illicit Affairs" -- this thing she cannot talk about
They'll say I'm nuts if I talk about The existence of you
--
But it's not just that the love affair has changed her and he left-- it's that it has ruined her, hurt her-- maimed her -- and I couldn't not make this comparison:
Down bad, wakin' up in blood (Wakin' up in blood) Starin' at the sky, come back and pick me up
--
All Too Well (Ten Minute Version):
From when your Brooklyn broke my skin and bones I'm a soldier who's returning half her weight And did the twin flame bruise paint you blue? Just between us, did the love affair maim you too?
It's blood and bruises and broken bones!! She has to compare her internal pain to a physical condition, one that leaves a change, leaves a mark-- and it's not that it's a result of an accident -- he did this to her
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rynwritesstuff · 1 year
Text
Illicit Affairs
Charlie Barber x Reader
Word count: 480
Warnings: Arguing, angst, mentions of affairs
Summary: The aftermath of you telling Charlie that you love him.
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“Don’t call me ‘kid’, don’t call me ‘baby’, look at this godforsaken mess that you made me.” - Illicit Affairs, Taylor Swift
You knew this was coming. Deep down, you knew. It had to boil over at some point and spill all over your perfect, pretty little plans. That’s just how Charlie is. He’s complicated and indecisive when it comes to these things, and God only knows how that miraculous mind of his works . . .
He’s standing in front of you now, and you are crying. Crying, crying, crying. Why do you always cry when presented with confrontation and conflict? 
“I don’t know what to say,” Charlie says, damn-near scoffing at you, even though he isn’t meaning to. No, no, no way. He thinks of you fondly, he’s made it obvious . . . All throughout this several-month-long affair, he’s thought of you fondly. At least, that’s what you’ve told yourself in order to fall asleep at night. But now, now that you’ve said the ‘L’ word, Charlie is retreating. Backing away. Closing in on himself the way he does when he’s uncomfortable. 
“You don’t have to say anything,” you tell him, shaking your head. “I just wanted you to know.”
Charlie huffs. 
“Jesus, you’re killing me here,” he says quietly, pinching the bridge of his nose. Your eyebrows furrow. 
“I’m killing you?”
“Yes!” he says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the entire world.
“What does that even mean!?” you ask, genuinely wanting to hear his response.
“It means fuck! I’m married!” 
“That never seemed to stop you before,” you say, crossing your arms as Charlie glares down at you. 
“I still care about Nicole. She’s still my wife.”
You pause, hesitating. You’ve embarrassed yourself. That’s what’s happened here. You told him you loved him, and he told you that he still cares about his wife, and–
“Fuck,” you breathe, closing your eyes. “Fuck.”
You tricked yourself into thinking that this could be something more than a fling. An affair. A fun little rendezvous. How could you be so stupid? So blind? He doesn’t love you; he never did. He just wanted someone to fuck, someone who wasn’t Nicole. 
He’s saying your name, now, but you’re hurrying to pull your shoes on and get the fuck out of his house. There are paintings and pictures on the walls, ones that remind you that a family lives here, a family you were willing to destroy for a chance to love Charlie Barber. 
“Don’t,” you snap when Charlie reaches for your arm. “I’m leaving.”
“Don’t go, we can talk this out,” Charlie says. 
You shake your head. 
“I’m not sticking around just to be your sex buddy, Charlie. I can’t do it.”
He clenches his jaw, and you walk out of his front door for the last time, tears shining in your eyes. 
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visxionaries · 8 months
Text
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@fromspringandfire
noted by maester acuri in the year 144ac, following a decree issued by king cedric of house tyrell, first of his name:
the lands and keep of hollywell, situated half a day's ride from highgarden and within lands of house tyrell, are hereby decreed a transfer of complete ownership to laena of house oldflowers. the deeds of the lands, including all livestock, farms, and subjects, are hereby issued to laena of house oldflowers.
ooc: following the appointment of becoming the official mistress of the reach king, laena has been allocated lands and a keep of her own, in her name. she has not been legitimised, but by law, these lands belong to laena and laena alone. hollywell is within tyrell land's, half a day's ride from highgarden itself.
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fullstcp · 4 months
Text
"folklore" by Taylor Swift Sentence Starters
the 1
"I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit."
"If you wanted me, you really should've showed."
"If you never bleed, you're never gonna grow."
"We were something, don't you think so?"
"If my wishes came true, it would've been you."
"It would've been fun if you would've been the one."
"You know the greatest loves of all time are over now."
"If one thing had been different, would everything be different today?"
"It would've been sweet if it could've been me."
cardigan
"When you are young, they assume you know nothing."
"I knew you."
"A friend to all is a friend to none."
"To kiss in cars and downtown bars was all we needed."
"You drew stars around my scars and now I'm bleeding."
"I knew you tried to change the ending."
"I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss."
"I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs."
"I knew everything when I was young."
"I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired."
"I knew you'd come back to me."
the last great american dynasty
"How did a middle-class divorcee do it?"
"There goes the last great American dynasty?"
"Who knows, if you never showed up, what could've been?"
"You had a marvelous time ruining everything."
"Who knows, if I never showed up, what could've been?"
"I had a marvelous time ruining everything."
exile
"I think I've seen this film before and I didn't like the ending."
"You're not my homeland anymore, so what am I defending now?"
"You were my town, now I'm in exile, seeing you out."
"Those eyes add insult to injury."
"I'm not your problem anymore."
"Who am I offending now?"
"There is no amount of crying I can do for you."
"We always walked a very thin line."
"You didn't even hear me out."
"You never gave a warning sign."
"I gave so many signs."
"You never learned to read my mind."
"I could never turn things around."
my tears ricochet
"If I'm on fire, you'll be made of ashes too."
"Even on my worst day, did I deserve all the hell you gave me?"
"I loved you, I swear I loved you."
"I didn't have it in myself to go with grace."
"If I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake?"
"You know I didn't want to have to haunt you."
"I can go anywhere I want, just not home."
"You can aim for my heart, go for blood, but you would still miss me in your bones."
"I still talk to you when I'm screaming at the sky."
"You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same."
"You turned into your worst fears."
mirrorball
"I'll show you every version of yourself tonight."
"When I break, it's in a million pieces."
"I know they said the end is near."
"I can change everything about me to fit in."
"You are not like the regulars."
"I'm still trying everything to get you laughing at me."
"I'm still a believer, but I don't know why."
"I've never been a natural, all I do is try, try, try."
"I'm still trying everything to keep you looking at me."
seven
"Are there still beautiful things?"
"Thought I can't recall your face, I still got love for you."
"Love you to the moon and to Saturn."
"I think you should come live with me."
"Just like a folk song, our love will be passed on."
august
"I never needed anything more."
"I can see us lost in a memory."
"I can see us twisted in bedsheets."
"You were never mine."
"I remember thinking I had you."
"Wanting was enough. For me, it was enough."
"Meet me behind the mall."
"So much for summer love and saying 'us'."
"You weren't mine to lose."
this is me trying
"I've been having a hard time adjusting."
"I didn't know if you'd care if I came back."
"I just wanted you to know that this is me trying."
"They told me all of my cages were mental."
"I got wasted like all my potential."
"My words shoot to kill when I'm mad."
"It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you."
illicit affairs
"Make sure nobody sees you leave."
"Take the road less traveled by."
"What started in beautiful rooms ends with meetings in parking lots."
"Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me."
"You showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else."
"You taught me a secret language you know I can't speak with anyone else."
"For you, I would ruin myself a million little times."
invisible string
"Were there clues I didn't see?"
"One single thread of gold tied me to you."
"Hell was the journey, but it brought me heaven."
mad woman
"What did you think I'd say to that?"
"Every time you call me crazy, I get more crazy."
"They say, 'move on', but you know I won't."
"It's obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together."
"I'm taking my time cause you took everything from me."
epiphany
"Some things you just can't speak out."
"With you I serve, with you I fall down."
"Watch you breathe in, watch you breathing out."
betty
"The worst thing that I ever did was what I did to you."
"Would you have me? Would you want me?"
"I don't know anything, but I know I miss you."
"I know where it all went wrong."
"I hate the crowds, you know that."
"I dreamt of you all summer long."
"Right now is the last time I can dream about what happens when you see my face again."
"Will you have me? Will you love me?"
"If you kiss me, will it be just like I dreamed it?"
"You know I miss you."
peace
"Our coming-of-age has come and gone."
"I never had the courage of my convictions as long as danger is near."
"I could never give you peace."
"All these people think love's for show, but I would die for you in secret."
"The devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me."
"Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?"
"Your integrity makes me seem small."
"It's like I'm wasting your honor."
"I'd give you my sunshine, give you my best."
"The rain is always gonna come if you're standing with me."
hoax
"Your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in."
"Don't want no other shade of blue but you."
"I am ash from your fire."
"No other sadness in the world would do."
"You knew the hero died so what's the movie for?"
"You knew you won so what's the point of keeping score?"
"You have beaten my heart."
the lakes
"I don't belong and, my beloved, neither do you."
"What should be over, burrowed under my skin in heart-stopping waves of hurt."
"I want you right here."
"I'm setting off, but not without you."
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cheezecakeee · 1 year
Text
Enhypen as Taylor Swift songs🫧 (angst. ver)
enhypen masterlist | main masterlist
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──●◎●──
➺ Heesung : illicit affairs
"Take the roads less traveled by, tell yourself you can always stop, what started in beautiful rooms, ends with meetings in parking lots" "and that's the thing about illicit affairs, and clandestine meetings, and stolen stares, they show their truth one single time but it dies a million times" "don't call me "kid", don't call me "baby", look at this godforsaken mess that you made me, you showed me the colours you know I can't see with anyone else, don't call me "kid", don't call me "baby", look at this idiotic fool that you made me, you taught me a language I can't speak with anyone else" "and you know damn well, for you i would ruin myself a million little times"
➺ Jay : 'tis the damn season
"It's kind of cold, fogs up the windshield glass but i felt it when i passed you, there's an ache in you put there by the ache in me but if it's all the same to you, it's the same to me" "time flies, messy as the mud on your truck tires, now I'm missing your smile, hear me out, we could just ride around and the roads not taken looks real good now and it always leads me to you in my hometown" "wonder about the only soul who can tell which smiles I'm fakin' and the heart i know I'm breakin' is my own to leave the warmest bed I've ever known" "we could call it even, even though I'm leavin' and I'll be yours for the weekend, 'tis the damn season"
➺ Jake : story of us
"I used to know my place was a spot next to you, now I'm searching the room for an empty seat, 'cause lately i don't even know what page you're on. Oh a simple complication, miscommunication leads to fall out, so many things i wish i knew but there's so many walls I can't break through" "this is looking like a contest of who can act like they care less, but i liked it more when you were on my side. The battle's is in your hand now but i would lay my armour down if you'd say you'd rather love than fight" "so many things you wish i knew, but the story of us might be ending soon" "and we're not speaking, and i wanted to know is it killing you like it's killing me? I don't know how since a twist of fate and 'cause we are going down and the story of us looks like a tragedy now"
➺ Sunghoon - tolerate it
"I sit and watch you read with your head hung low, i wake and watch you breathing with your eyes closed, i sit and watch you, i notice everything you do, you're so much old and wise and I wait by the door like a little kid, use my best colours for your potrait, lay the table with the fancy shit and watch you tolerate it" "while you were building other worlds where was i? Where's the man who'd throw blankets over my barbed wire? I made you my temple, my mural, my sky, now I'm begging for footnotes in the story of your life" "you assume i am fine, but what would you do if I break free and leave us in the ruins, took this dagger in me and remove it, gain the weight of you then lose it, believe me i could it" " if it's all in my head tell me now, tell me I've got it wrong somehow, I know my love should be celebrated, but you tolerate it"
➺ Sunoo : exile
"And it took you five whole minutes to pack us up and leave me with it holdin' all this love out there in my hands" "second, third, and hundred chances, balancing on breaking branches, those eyes add insult to the injury" "so step right out, there's no amount of crying i can do for you, all this time we walked a very thin line, you didn't even hear me out, you never gave a warning sign. All this time I never learned to read your mind, i couldn't turn things around, 'cause you never gave me a warning sign" "and i think I've seen this film before and i didn't like the ending, you're not my homeland anymore, so who am I defending now? You were my town, now I'm in exile, seein' you out, i think I've seen this film before, so I'm leavin' out the side door."
➺ Jungwon : Last Kiss
"I do recall now, the smell of the rain, fresh on the pavement, i ran off the plane that july ninth, the beat of your heart it jumps through your shirt I can still feel your arms. But now I'll go, sit on the floor wearing your clothes, all i know is i don't know" "So I'll watch your life in picture like i used to watch you sleep an I feel like you forget me like I used to feel you breathe, and I'll keep with our old friends just to ask them how you are, hope it's nice where you are. And I hope the sun shines and it's a beautiful day, and something reminds you, you wish you had stayed, you can plan fora change in weather and time but i never planed on changing your mind" "I never thought we'd had a last kiss, never imagined we'd end like this, your name, forever on my lips."
➺ Niki : coney island
"And if this is the long haul, how did we get here so soon? Did i close my fist around something delicate? Did i shatter you?" "Over and over, lost again with no surprises, disappointment close your eyes and it gets colder and colder when the sun goes down" "were you waiting at our old spot in the tree line, by the gold clock? Did I leave you hanging every single day? Were you standing in the hallway with a big cake? Happy Birthday. Did I paint your bluest skies the darkest gray? A universe away" "when the sun goes down the sight that flashed before me was your face, when the sun goes down but i think i forgot to say your name, over and over, sorry for not making you my centerfold"
──●◎●──
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renazuku · 1 year
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forever and always.
a collection of stories based on the songs featured on folklore and evermore by taylor swift.
gosh! i am so excited to start this up! if you would like to be added to the taglist, please REPLY TO THIS POST. do not send in an ask! all works will be gender neutral!
my hero academia and lyrics used belong to their rightful owners. in no way am i claiming ownership to the series or taylor's lyrics.
right where you left me; aizawa shouta (coming soon!)
after the death of his beloved spouse, aizawa just isn't sure what he should do now. eat, teach, sleep, repeat. aizawa is on autopilot, but there's one thing he never forgets to do every week; visit your favorite restaurant. he's right where you left him. "help, i'm still at the restaurant. still sitting in a corner i haunt."
the 1; takami keigo (coming soon!)
breakups always hurt, especially when the two of you never went further than a situationship. it only hurts more when you see each other again 2 years later, and you realize that things could've been different. maybe, he would've been the 1. "rosé flowing with your chosen family. and it would've been sweet, if it could've been me."
cardigan; dabi (coming soon!)
contains spoilers for season six. if there was one thing you remember about your childhood, you remember a certain white haired boy. most of your memories with him were happy, and filled with puppy (or maybe real) love. well, until the incident. so imagine your horror when you turn on the tv for the night, and there he is. "i knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs. the smell of smoke would hang around this long, 'cause i knew everything when i was young."
mirrorball; kaminari denki (coming soon!)
why is everyone making fun of him? why is everyone laughing? his head is pounding from overusing his quirk, and they're laughing? maybe he is useless after all. or maybe, with a little bit of your comfort, maybe he can see what you see in him. "and i'm still a believer, but i don't know why. i've never been a natural, all i do is try, try, try."
this is me trying; bakugou katsuki
bakugou hasn't had the brightest past. in the moonlight, his regrets seem to cut a little deeper than usual. after failing to get his hero license, he can't help but feel lackluster to everyone else. he just wants people to know that he's trying. "i was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere. fell behind on my classmates, and i ended up here."
august; todoroki shoto
the summer before shoto entered U.A, he met someone and had the time of his life. unfortunately for him, summer loves don't always last. "so much for summer love, and saying us, 'cause you weren't mine to lose."
invisible string; midoriya izuku (coming soon!)
you and izuku have been attached since your toddler days. no matter what happened, the two of you knew that you'd always have each other. "isn't it just so pretty to think all along there was some invisible string tying you to me?"
champagne problems; iida tenya (coming soon!)
it's been three years since you and your classmates graduated from U.A. your longtime boyfriend decides to throw a dinner party. you didn't know he was popping the question. he didn't know that you'd answer like that. "love slipped beyond your reaches. and i couldn't give a reason. champagne problems."
illicit affairs; shigaraki tomura (coming soon!)
maintaining a secret relationship with one of japan's biggest villains is hard. knowing that you'll always go back to him only makes it harder. "don't call me kid. don't call me baby. look at this godforsaken mess that you've made me."
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cherriegyuu · 1 year
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seventeen as songs from folklore (ts)
this is also include songs from evermore
a/n: for this, i'll be giving songs and lyrics to each of the members, as well as small plots based on those lyrics. i don't plan to write all of these, but they are still my ideas (as basic as some of them might be). so if you are interested in writing one of them, you can message me about it. if you want to read one of them you can send in a request and i'll write for you
red | 1989 | reputation | lover | folklore | midnights
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• Seungcheol ➝ Champagne Problems Your mom's ring in your pocket Her picture in your wallet You won't remember all my Champagne problems ↳ you watch from afar as Seungcheol moves on with his life after you broke his heart.
• Jeonghan ➝ Gold Rush I don't like that anyone would die to feel your touch Everybody wants you Everybody wonders what it would be like to love you ↳ you always took pride in the fact that you aren’t very jealous of your boyfriend, mostly because you trust him blindly. But, sometimes, you need him to remind you that you’re the only one he loves.
• Joshua ➝ ​'Tis The Damn Season You can run, but only so far I escaped it too, remember how you watched me leave But if it's okay with you, it's okay with me ↳ it’s been years since you last saw Joshua. At the time, both of you had been desperate to leave and ready to start your lives in the big city, however, you were the only one who managed to escape. Years later, you came back for the holidays and things seemed to be the exact same, including your feelings for him.
• Jun ➝ Hoax Your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in Don't want no other shade of blue but you No other sadness in the world would do ↳ you knew Jun had fallen out of love with you a long time ago but still you couldn’t bring yourself to let go, having him hate you was better than not having his at all.
• Soonyoung ➝ Mirrorball And I'm still a believer, but I don't know why I've never been a natural, all I do is try try try I'm still on that trapeze I'm still trying everything to keep you looking at me ↳ Soonyoung is just tired of being the life of the party, of always being the one people go to when they aren’t feeling well because they know he will cheer them up. For once, he wished someone else did the listening and comforting.
• Wonwoo ➝ Seven Love you to the Moon and to Saturn Passed down like folk songs The love lasts so long ↳ never in your life would you have thought that you would be able to love someone but then you met Wonwoo, and he showed you just how great love could be with the right person.
• Jihoon ➝ Illicit Affairs Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me You showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else Look at this idiotic fool that you made me You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else ↳ Jihoon never thought that he would be the third person in a relationship and yet, there he is, looking at you from afar as you dance with your fiancé.
• Minghao ➝ Cardigan But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss I knew you'd hunt all of my what-ifs ↳ as a college student, you had a one-sided crush on Minghao. even years later, when he's no longer in your life, you can't help but compare every guy you meet to him.
• Mingyu ➝ Right Where You Left Me Did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen? Time went on for everybody else, she won't know it She's still twenty-three inside her fantasy ↳ you were never ready to move on after you lost Mingyu.
• Seokmin ➝ The One I persist and resist the temptation to ask you If one thing had been different Would everything be different today? ↳ you never thought you'd see Seokmin again, but when you're forced to change jobs you discover that he is your new boss you can't help but reminisce on the past.
• Vernon ➝ August Back when we were still changin' for the better Wanting was enough For me, it was enough To live for the hope of it all ↳ you always had hope that one day Vernon would see you as more than just a friend, so when he introduces you to his new girlfriend you feel your heart break into a million pieces.
• Seungkwan ➝ Invisible String Time, curious time Gave me no clue, gave me no signs We're there clues I didn't see? ↳ since you were kids, life always found a way to put you and Seungkwan together in the same room.
• Chan ➝ This Is Me Trying I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere Fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here Pouring out my heart to a stranger ↳ Everyone always had high expectations for Chan, he was always the future of something. For once, all Chan wanted was to live in the moment, and with you, he found an opportunity to do so.
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foxes-that-run · 11 months
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Illicit Affairs
Taylor has sung about an affair on every album since Reputation. She revelled in betrayal on reputation (I did something bad), on Lover she had conflicted feelings (cruel summer) and regret here on Folklore. Folklore onward is presented as fiction, its evident many songs draw in part from personal experience, as her eras performance of illicit affairs and its 1989/Haylor references show.
In the Long Pond Sessions Taylor introduced the song as being not from personal experience. While I don't think it is autobiographical it has references to other songs that indicates it is at least in part drawn from personal experience.
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Lyrics
[Verse 1] Make sure nobody sees you leave Hood over your head, keep your eyes down Tell your friends you're out for a run You’ll be flushed when you return Take the road less traveled by Tell yourself you can always stop What started in beautiful rooms Ends with meetings in parking lots
I don’t think this is intended but every time I hear the opening verse I picture this. This open is a general tone setting of it being an affair rather than identifying anyone.
At the end of this verse we see this affair is has lost it gloss. Comparatively, the lyric video for illicit affairs is of a rainy, leafy parking lot.
[Chorus] And that's the thing about illicit affairs And clandestine meetings and longing stares It's born from just one single glance But it dies and it dies and it dies A million little times
The chorus is very visual for me, from a longing stare, a thrilling single glance. The single glance speaks of a irresistible attraction as in the gorgeous “And you should think about the consequence / Of you touching my hand in a darkened room (Dark room, dark room)”
The dies a million times to me is telling the protagonist to put it aside, to stop thinking about the person they long for.
[Verse 2] Leave the perfume on the shelf That you picked out just for him So you leave no trace behind Like you don’t even exist Take the words for what they are A dwindling, mercurial high A drug that only worked The first few hundred times
Verse 2 depicts the feeling of shame and hiding, knowingly betraying someone else and hiding their time. To me, this may be imagery about feeling that a relationship is being hidden.
The verse ends with liking this relationship as a drug, something Taylor did in Clean and DBATC. HS has also likened his relationship with TS as a drug in Meet me in the Hallway.
The drug only worked the first hundred times, this tells us the affair is long term, and also similar to this line in Exile “Second, third, and hundredth chances”
[Chorus] And that's the thing about illicit affairs And clandestine meetings and stolen stares They show their truth one single time But they lie and they lie and they lie A million little times
The second chorus has changed, longing stares has changed to stolen stares, indicating they have started acting on the longing in verse 2. I love how Taylor sings stolen stares here.
The (desire) dying has turned into lies, because they are having an affair.
[Bridge] And you wanna scream Don't call me "kid," don't call me "baby" Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me You showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else Don't call me "kid," don't call me "baby" Look at this idiotic fool that you made me You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else
The bridge throws away the pretence that Taylor is singing of someone else and she uses the first person. This verse has many similarities to haylor songs:
Harry has a similar lyric to don't call me baby in TBSL: "Don't call me baby again / It's hard for me to go home / Be so lonely"
In All you had to do was stay Taylor sang "I've been picking off the pieces / Of the mess you made"
Showing Taylor colours she can't see with anyone else is a reference to OOTW and Question (see Haylor Colours)
[Outro] And you know damn well For you, I would ruin myself A million little times
Finally, we can assume which muse Taylor would ruin herself for who was not her BF.
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