#looked like a pulsating blob with veins

[umilily]

they either need to let me analyse kick samples more often or hide them from me bc for whatever reason the moment they end up in my hands i find shit never seen before

[tlbodine]

Overthinking: Egg Monsters from Mars

Egg Monsters From Mars is Goosebumps #42, released in the spring of '96. I remember this one's cover but had never read it. I think I had a vague sense that it would be dumb, as a kid, which is a real shame because I actually thought this was refreshingly good in a run of so-so mid-era Goosebumps books. Let's see what it's about and what's special about it...

First, the Plot: Dana Johnson is a scientifically-minded kid with a couple scientist parents and a bratty little sister who tends to get whatever she wants. Since her birthday is close to Easter this year, she asked for an egg hunt for her party. All of her friends start hunting eggs in the yard, but the party swiftly descends into chaos when it's discovered that her mom didn't bother hard-boiling them. The ensuing egg fight makes a huge mess and sours their parents to the entire topic of eggs, which is a real shame because Dana found a very unusual egg down by the creek.

It's big. It's covered in veins. And it's pulsating.

Since his parents won't listen to him when he tries to explain, he puts it in his sock drawer, where it hatches into a...big quivering blob that looks kind of like scrambled eggs with beady eyes. He tries to show it to his best friend, who's less impressed by it than she should be, and encourages him to go take it to a laboratory in town. He does, and there encounters Dr. Gray.

At first, Dr. Gray seems very friendly. He explains that he's familiar with these creatures, that he's been studying them awhile and believes they are from Mars and came to earth via a meteor shower recently. He has them in a special part of his lab that's kept nice and cold so they don't overheat and melt.

The problem is that now that Dana has come into contact with them, Dr. Gray won't let him leave. So he keeps him locked in the lab with them. He spends a long, shivery night as a prisoner. His dad comes looking for him but cannot see him through the double-sided mirror Dr. Gray has set up. And the doctor is infuriated when Dana learns to communicate with the monsters and they merge together into a blanket to warm him in the night.

Dr. Gray insinuates that he needs to kill Dana to keep him quiet. Dana manages to escape with the help of the egg monsters. He explains what happened to his parents, who are deeply concerned but skeptical. When they go back to the lab, the egg monsters and the doctor are gone without a trace.

Dana gets examined by the family doctor and seems to be just fine. Except he has a new habit.....laying eggs.

Overthinking It:

There are few things Stine loves more than an evil scientist, likely owing to the popularity of that trope in his childhood (between Atomic Age uneasiness and Hays Code restrictions on the supernatural, scientists were the villains of many '40s and '50s horror movies). Some of his best books hinge on the stranger-danger of an adult with authority who means a child harm, and that's on display here.

Dr. Gray is straight up chilling (no pun intended). His cold, calculated approach to science and his complete heel-face-turn when it comes to excitedly sharing his find with Dana but his willingness to sacrifice the kid to the altar of science is legitimately frightening. Here is a book where the real monster is institutional power, and the alien creatures are misunderstood allies. Guillermo Del Toro would love this shit.

Something else I enjoyed about Egg Monsters is its willingness to deviate from some of Stine's usual stock character types. It's a refreshing change of pace to have Dana be a serious, studious, thoughtful kid as opposed to our usual practical joker type. His friend Anne brings some of that energy to the table, which is fine in the few scenes she's in. But having Dana be more solemn really helps sell the gravity of this situation.

Also, I can only imagine how terrifying this whole thing must have been for his parents!

I will say that the egg-fight setup and payoff does go on for quite a while. Like it takes up soooo much narrative space and that feels a little filler-y. But by the same token, the ensuing chaos of the egg goo everywhere is its own kind of horror. A birthday party descending into a food fight, where your friends won't listen even when you're begging them to stop, where the damage is real and lasting, where the crowd acts of its own accord and behaves as a mindless force of destruction....that is already pretty frightening, actually. It's played with a deft hand here because eggs are ultimately mostly harmless but it's easy to imagine these kids frenzying in some other, more horrifying way.

Honestly, this one is floating up to the top for me. I'll put this one up next to Cuckoo Clock of Doom for some of Stine's best experimental writing.

If You Liked This, THESE Will Really Give You Goosebumps:

I'm not joking about Del Toro here. If you like stories where the "monster" is misunderstood and the real villain is a regular guy with a cold-hearted commitment to his job, you're gonna love The Shape of Water.

If you wanted the egg monsters themselves to be a bigger threat, may I direct you instead to Alien?

Also a shout-out to Critters, which also come to earth in the form of supremely weird eggs

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

I had a dream last night that they made a legacy sequel to Coneheads called Children of the Cone about old man Dan Aykroyd taking his human-cone hybrid grandchildren on a roadtrip across America, and they were all horribly mutated blobs of pulsating meat and veins because cone DNA isn't compatible with ours, but they had holographic disguises that allowed them to look human when they need to (hijinks ensue when the disguise generators act up). The only scene I remember was them driving through the Nevada desert when a nuclear bomb test went off, and they were excited to stand in the blast wave like it was the splash zone at an aquatic amusement park.

Hollywood, hire me, I'm ready when you are.

[prying-pandora666]

What Is Up With the Spirit Designs!?

It’s no secret that some fans prefer the spirits of ATLA over LOK.

ATLA’s spirits were more in-line with Shintoism. A natural part of the world we share. Both familiar and alien. Unknowable yet also capable of communicating.

A far cry from LOK’s cute Ghibli blobs and sassy furries.

But the most egregious example IMO is Father Glowworm.

Here is how he is described in the Kyoshi novels:

“It appears as a great glowing eyeball the size of a wagon wheel with a sickly luminescent green tinge and attached to a web of pulsating veins.”

Expectation?

Some terrifying oni looking monster of webbed pulsating flesh with an eye, right? Maybe something like a Hyakume or even more horrible to behold:

Or even something more like Tears of the Kingdom!

What did Avatar Generations give us?

Rainbow Tentacle monsters or Vaatu’s uglier brother:

What a disappointment!

Thankfully the game was shut down before these designs were ever released. They belong firmly in the “concept art” department.

Fandom artists, please tell me if you have any better designs! I’d love to see them to cleanse my eyes and my soul.

[pbjplatypus]

The door burst open, and Dr. Scott ran into the dark laboratory.

"Miller! What the hell is going on here?"

Dr. Miller smiled. "Ah, Dr. Scott, so good of you to finally join me!"

As Dr. Scott ran up to his colleague, he saw the shadow of a man bound to a strange device in the darkness.

Miller chuckled. "Finally accepted my invitation, have you?"

"Miller, you son of a bitch, who do you have tied - " Dr. Scott circled the shape of the man, and it seemed to change. Parts seemed to separate and shrink into thin air, and at certain angles, it looked like a blob of flesh, veins and muscles pulsating in the open air.

Dr. Scott was taken aback. "What do you have locked to that machine?"

Dr. Miller laughed, a perverse joy spreading across his face. "This is what I've been working on, Dr. Scott. All of those grants, teaching those lectures and seminars... It was all for this. This... My angel."

"Your... Your angel?" Dr. Scott looked at the shape, the creature, and back to Miller. "Dear God, man, when you began looking into extradimensional science..."

"That was the end phase, yes. And finally, FINALLY, I know enough to capture an angel. To perhaps even get to its heaven myself."

"Get there... Miller, it hardly seems alive here, what do you think this heaven might do to you??"

Dr. Miller looked down at his hands. His arms were shaking with anticipation. "Perhaps... Perhaps it would give me peace."

He looked back at the angel and started toward it. Dr. Scott made a motion to stop him, but stopped midway. The angel might see that as a threat. Dr. Scott didn't know. He couldn't know.

Dr. Miller stood over the angel's primary form, the central point from which its undulating masses seemed to orbit. "Well. You know what you took from me. Give it back."

The voice that responded to him was wet, and reverberated across the laboratory with a delicate force. "What is it that you seek, Garth Miller?"

Miller clenched his fists, rage building up for just a second before he regained his composure. "The knowledge. The knowledge that you took from me, Michael, decades ago!"

The angel was silent. Miller frowned.

"In the winter of 1918, as I was leaving Germany, I found a book strewn on what once was a wheat field. It was beaten up, almost as though it had been through the Great War itself. It took me a year to translate it. What I read in that book tore open my eyes and rended my soul apart. Suddenly I could SEE, I saw the universe for what it WAS. It was as if I was following electrical cables toward a control box! And had I been given the time, I'm sure I would've deciphered the controls, as well!

"But you. Just as I was noting my observations of the unseen world I was discovering, YOU appeared in front of me! You touched my head, did - did something to my mind, and TOOK my book! And all of a sudden, this beautiful revelation I was moving towards was gone! Trying to think of it, think of how it worked, think at ALL, was like attempting to grasp a slick glass vase, only to have it slip and shatter. You did this to me, Michael!

"But now, I have you. I can see your organs straining under the shape of this world. You're from somewhere else, somewhere higher, and it's like if I were to try to fit myself onto a piece of paper. It hurts, doesn't it?"

Dr. Scott called out. "M-Miller! Stop this madness!"

Dr. Miller ignored him. "Well? Give me what I want, or I, the insect, will squash you, the man."

The angel's voice resonated through the room yet again. "What knowledge you gained was not yours to keep," Michael said. "Nor is it mine to give. Had we let you continue, Garth Miller, you would have set down a path of destruction unlike that which this world has ever known. You... All of you... Are not ready for such knowledge."

Dr. Miller nodded his head, his whole body shaking with anger. "A waiting game, is it? I can see those shapes of flesh you call a body. They're changing faster now. I can tell that you're in pain."

"Miller, I don't think - "

Dr. Scott was cut off as Michael's voice replied, "Do not perceive my flesh as your flesh, nor my body as your body... Nor your frequencies as my frequencies."

The laboratory suddenly went pitch-black.

"Dr. Miller!" Dr. Scott called.

Suddenly, a blinding flash of light burst from where Michael had been. Every piece of metal in the room was blown back, clattering into the walls with a great crash. Dr.s Scott and Miller were both thrown to the ground. And then, darkness.

After a moment, the lights of the lab flicked back to life with a hum. Dr. Scott rubbed his eyes, sitting up.

He looked to Dr. Miller. Blood was beginning to soak into his lab coat.

"Miller!" He scrambled over to the doctor, checking for a pulse.

Miller grinned. "I'm quite alright, Dr. Scott." From under his lab coat, he produced a fragment of the angel's flesh, still pulsating. He also held up a scalpel.

"Now... Would you like analyze the matter of heaven, Scott?"

[sebastianshaw]

Shaw is living his dream at this one board and getting to fight Blob in one thread and Ursa Major in another, and, look, I just HAD to share this one post I just made with him to the latter. For context, Ursa just tore a patch of fur from his own chest to demonstrate to Shaw that he doesn’t feel pain before charging at him.

Shaw stayed where he was as the bear returned, neither fleeing nor attempting to knock the other mutant back. He did not want to finish this fight before it had a chance to really start. “Spare me your sniveling Soviet spiel!” Shaw shouted, raising a clenched fist, and as he did, he flexed, causing his suit and the shirt beneath to EXPLODE off his muscular hairy body like the wall of the building had. The veins in his powerful arm were pulsating with both his ire at Ursa Major’s words and his eagerness to do battle with the literal bear. This fool might not be a man of worthy mind, but surely his body had more mettle! And Shaw wanted to test his against it! His eyes widened, though, when he saw his opponent TEAR HIS OWN CHEST FUR OFF! This was a display of masochism beyond anything that Shaw had ever witnessed even in all his time as the undisputed kinkster king of the Hellfire Club at its most debauched! Truly, such self-hate must be necessary, he supposed, to ever submit to the twisted tyranny of SOCIALISM! Shaw shook his shock off quickly, not wanting to let the Russkie see him blink, and shouted back, “And save your prayers for yourself!” Shaw launched himself forward, meeting Ursa Major’s grapple with one of his own. No throwing him this time---he wanted this bear CLOSE as he squeezed the life out of him! Not yet, though---he wanted to ENJOY this fight first! As for everyone else, they’d just better get out of the way, for Shaw had no more regard for the safety of American civilians than Mikhail did as they tumbled and tussled across the pavement in a whirlwind of blood, fur, sweat, and MASCULINITY so great it was knocking CARS aside like mere toys! And among all the chaos, one could hear Shaw’s great bellowing voice from the center of the action-- “IS A MAN NOT ENTITLED TO THE SWEAT OF HIS BROW?!”

[annerly-san]

Malignance - [Chapter 1: Anomaly]

Primary Character Pairing: Getou Suguru x Reader/Gender-Neutral OC Story Summary: You are a curse. A burden. You are a tumor that grows within me. A malignant cancer. Cursed upon conception at birth, “Akusei Shuyo” was born from the hatred and ire of humans to the form of a special human-curse hybrid. Knowing nothing but the foulness of human hatred, fear, and hostility, a single chance encounter with a human able to give something other than such putrid emotions opens up a dangerous relationship between a curse-human hybrid and a sorcerer that holds the potential ability to reign control over them. [A Getou Suguru x Gender-Neutral Reader/OC] Chapter Navigation: [Next chapter to be updated]

The building in front of them was ostentatious. Getou stared up at the towering black fence gate of intricate lattice work and geometric spires that pointed towards the clear blue sky ahead. All along his horizontal peripheral was an endless wall of modern-eqse beige and white concrete blocks that most likely bordered the perimeter of the entire area.

For a high school, this was overkill. Gojo, who was standing next to him with evident distaste on his face, seemed to share in his thoughts as the both of them shared a knowing gaze.

The duo had been standing at the front gate for an undeniably long time.

Getou was politely smiling at the guard positioned at the entrance as he stared and flipped through the papers and identification that Getou had provided him. Gojo, was glaring at the other guard at the post— lips pulled back to make a face full of confrontational disdain.

School security was important for sure, but the extent that this school had gone to was ludicrous.

“Tokyo Tech had sent you here on the request of the headmaster?”

“That’s correct.” Getou had maintained his calm smile, and it betrayed none of the growing irritation that was brewing within him— though that façade was quickly wearing thin. This was the fifth time the guard had asked.

“Hmm…” the papers were shuffled through again. “Alright. These seem legitimate, but let me ping the headmaster just to be certain.”

Getou began tapping his foot in impatience, and Gojo began to pace circles back and forth as the guard rang up the headmaster on his radio.

“Ah yes, I have Getou Suguru and Gojo Satoru here from Tokyo Tech at the front entrance and wanted to confirm that he has permission from you to be on the premises.”

The ring went through, and Getou simmered with an annoyance as the thought of why this was not done earlier crossed his mind.

“Yes. Yes. Alright, much appreciated, Headmaster.” The guard turned to him with an unwarranted look of doubt and disdain. “You can go in now.”

Getou nodded and waved a hand at the guard as he walked through the opening gates. He watched as Gojo stuck out a tongue and blew it at the guards before sauntering in, and Getou didn’t bother to stifle the laughter that came out of it.

The interior was more grandiose than the gate. It was to be expected, but it left him with a sickening sense of irritation given the circumstances he had faced only at the entrance.

Yaga-sensei had warned them about the school. It was an incredibly prestigious private high school in Tokyo that the rich often sent their kids to study at. Scholarships and admissions were also granted based upon merit and the school was known to turn out incredibly intellectual and talented students.

It seemed stifling to be honest, and given the amount of incidents that had arisen to warrant calling two special-grade sorcerers to the fray, the amount of cursed energy in the area should be crushing their bodies and souls whole. Yet, there was nearly no cursed energy in the area at all. Nothing.

Getou looked over to Gojo, who had the same look of confusion and bewilderment on his face.

“Do you think it’s actually a special grade object?” Gojo asked inquisitively as he pat one of the stone columns on the buildings they passed by. “From what the damage was, it has to be a higher-grade curse, and the fact that the place is as quiet as this is unusual.”

“Yeah,” Getou nodded in agreement. “I get it if there’s no lower-grade curses lurking around, but how is there just no cursed energy in this area at all?” He muttered as his eyes darted about the campus. Getou held out his hand and summoned a few lower-grade curses to help scout around the area. “It might make sense if it’s an object. But with how things have been, shouldn’t there be some residual energy leaking from loose seals?”

Their school had received a concerning request calling for the investigation and resolution of a series of unfortunate events that had been plaguing the students, faculty, and staff for the past year. From car accidents to suicides, to poisonings and to descents into insanity, the victims of the school were suffering from a wide array of misfortune that befell both themselves as well as their friends, family, and loved ones.

Getou could recall his first exposure to this mission in an unbearably vivid quality. It was a desecrated corpse that had been unclogged and pulled out of an apartment’s plumbing system a few weeks back. Mangled to pieces with organs strewn all over in an endless crimson pool of bloodied water overflowing in the sink, but what shook him more than the sight of the gruesome death was the pulsating mass of purple and green that had embedded itself into the decaying fragments of what was a human body.

Shoko, despite her tough stomach with her experience in handling corpses and the like in the school’s morgue, was the first to run outside the building to regurgitate any contents within her stomach, and Getou soon followed with Gojo in tow.

It wasn’t a curse but rather the residual of it. Each reported victim associated with the school had the same vein like mass attached to them one way or another. For the past several days, the trio had been chasing empty leads with the victims in the hopes of finding the cursed spirit, user, or object that had proliferated such a vile curse all over the area to no avail.

Gojo prodded the pale green mass and it blobbed about gelatinously before wobbling to a still on the head of a hospital patient who had gone brain-dead in a sudden coma.

“It doesn’t seem to be dangerous or anything-“ his musing was interrupted by the door of the room crashing open.

A family member of the deceased had chosen to walk in at the same time of their visit and the tears running down her face only marked the beginning fiasco of the hysteria she was about to let loose.

Getou and Gojo stood there awkwardly as they watched the girl cry hysterically as she clutched the arm of what appeared to be her deceased brother whilst she pathetically shook him back and forth. Getou, trying to avoid looking at the uncomfortable sight before him, made the poor mistake of focusing on the pale green blob as it jiggled back and forth with the sway of the vegetable on the hospital bed. Gojo must have been doing something similar as the quiet choking sounds of his friend trying to stifle a laugh served as an addition to the white noise of the buzzing hospital room. Getou nudged his friend and gave him a glare for his inconsideration whilst doing his best to not look at the bobbling elastic mass of pale green and lilac.

“A-are you two the ones that are looking into h-his… h-his a-accident?” The girl finally managed to choke out some amount of words before standing up with an uncanny rage burning in the back of her eyes.

Getou slipped his hands into his pockets as Gojo awkwardly rubbed the back of his head.

“Yeah, we are.” Getou responded calmly. “Our sincerest condolences for your loss.”

A slam echoed in the quiet room as the girl dropped her book bag on the vinyl floor with a resounding thud. A burning rage in her eyes ignited as she stormed towards the two of them.

Getou froze and Gojo tensed up as she grabbed his shirt in a pleading manner— desperately looking up to him in a cry for help.

“P-PLEASE-“ she barely managed to get out. “IT’S THAT FUCKING SHUYO. THAT AKUSEI-“

Her words stopped there.

The blob that had been benign for the past several weeks of its encounter had latched onto the girl with its vein-like tendrils wrapping around the girl’s mouth and neck in a chokehold. Muffled screams grew higher and higher in pitch as Getou quickly reached out to pry it off of her, but it was too late and to no avail.

A loud crunch and pop sounded out in the room as the mass squeezed the body with a blinding compression and crushed her skull and popped her innards all over the hospital room floor. The pressure of the blood in her body released all at once and sprayed the fragments of what was once functional organs and tissue all over Getou and Gojo’s clothes.

Rhythmic dripping sounded against the vinyl tiles that were now crimson and covered in a growing puddle of blood and gore.

Getou could not move.

Frozen in place, he eyed the green blob resting on the exposed white spinal cord amidst the mass of fresh blood and tissue on the girl’s corpse as it pulsated slower and slower until it was benign once more.

Getou could hear Gojo vomit in the background as he stared in shocked horror at the mass of pure malevolence in front of him.

“She said… shuyo, didn’t she?” Gojo muttered as the two of them continued to traverse the campus. “Shuyo as in tumor?”

The words were spoken as though it were an insult to a person. To call someone a cancer was definitely a rare and degrading insult, but the way it was spoken in conjunction with malignance or “Akusei” was peculiar.

Akusei.

Shuyo.

Akusei Shuyo.

The words combined were a creative insult for sure. But the conjoinment of the two made for something far too literal to be used as such.

Unless it was actually someone’s name.

“She couldn’t mean… a person… right-?” Getou commented nervously at the insinuation of his words.

Gojo stared at him with a strange look on his face before turning to face straight ahead. “Shuyo… Akusei…”

The words meaning tumor, and the words meaning malignancy and evil nature.

A cold chill ran down his spine as Getou recalled the pale, green mass on the desecrated corpse of the girl in the hospital room

The curse residual was not unlike a malignant tumor in nature. Getou’s thoughts wandered as he walked alongside Gojo on the campus. That girl had called out for a “Akusei Shuyo”, but there was no possible way that she would have been able to see the cursed residual on her brother’s body as she was a regular human being. That ruled out the perpetrator being a curse. The manner of speaking implied a person rather than an object. Getou froze as Gojo continued to pace on ahead.

“Is it a curse user?” Getou asked aloud.

Gojo stopped and turned back to face him.

Before Getou could receive affirmation or denial from his companion, the tolling of the school bell rung and the walkways were beginning to become quickly saturated with students and staff transitioning back and forth for lunch and break.

The two of them stiffened at the sight.

Discretely attached to each and every body of the student and staff population that they were able to see at school was a pale green cluster of cancerous cells at risk of becoming malignant at any given moment.

[dabisrightnipple]

REDAMANCY

Kuroo Tetsurou x Reader

!!PLEASE DO NOT REPOST AND/OR ADD ONTO!!

Word Count: 3.4k

links

re·da·man·cy /reh-dah-man-cee/ noun An act of loving the one who loves you; a love returned in full

a/n: As some of y’all can hopefully tell, I just read Deciphered and am having a serious street racing/car phase hehehehe. Also make sure to support my other platforms!!!!

"Ow, what was that for?" you whined looking up at Kuroo, who had just rudely interrupted your daydream by throwing a little punch to your shoulder. You rubbed the affected area before looking up at Kuroo, giving him a pouty face. He rolled his eyes while grabbing onto the tassel on your graduation cap and moving it from the right side to the left.  

"Stupid, you weren't paying attention." He softly scolded, throwing you a look of disapproval while making sure to keep his voice as low as possible to not interrupt the ceremony.

"Oops!" You smiled cheekily spewing out a soft light-hearted chuckle. You turned your head to listen to the announcer as he started to count down the second you have left before completing the ceremony.

"Three..."

"Ready?" Kuroo asked while nudging your elbow slightly before grabbing onto your right hand, the other slowly rising to his cap, grabbing onto a corner getting ready to toss it.

"Two..."

"No, hehe."

The crowd went wild, all your senses became heightened as you heard deafening screams of joy, while you looked into the sky seeing a hundred caps, along with yours, being thrown into the air like small fireworks. All those caps carrying the stress school has brought you and many others, you felt the relief shoot through your fingers reaching down to your toes. You stood in your spot for a while, feeling relieved as chaos broke out all around you. Looking over at Kuroo, you cracked a large genuine smile towards him in which Kuroo returned.

Your pent-up excitement decided to finally come out of you causing a scream to erupt out of your throat, Your voice filling your ears, as well as Kuroos' and other bystanders. A wave of adrenaline washed over you as your screaming ceased, causing your throat to burn due to the extensive use of your vocal cords. With the adrenaline coursing through your veins you couldn't help but shake with anticipation of what your future will bring to you.

After all, You finally felt-

Free.

__________________

After the ceremony ended, the crowds started to venture out causing you to lose grip of Kuroos hand resulting in you getting separated and lost in the crowds of people, occasionally bumping into passer-Byers before finally weaving your way out to the parking lot. The moon shined down on you as you walked through the parking lot, dodging cars left and right trying to figure out where Kuroo parked before you felt a considerably large hand grab onto your wrist, pulling your figure back in the process only for your back to land on the mystery person chest.

"YOU IDIOT!" You yelled meeting Kuroos cat-like eyes, still shaking from the adrenaline high and you're now frightened conscious.

"Hey, I was just teaching you a lesson to be more alert." He matter-of-factly said, while making quick hand gestures to accommodate his point.

"Yea yea," You rolled your eyes stomping your feet against the concrete while following Kuroo to the parking spot where his car resided in. "Just open this stupid-ass car so we can go get ramen."

"Yes, Ma'am," Kuroo said, doing a little salute before unlocking the car, showing off his signature shit-eating smirk. You rolled your eyes again in acknowledgment before slipping off your graduation gown and cap, tossing it in the back as Kuroo did the same.

Finally arranging your stuff on the car floor and putting on your seatbelt you turned to look at Kuroo.   'Dayum'   You thought, ' He looks like one of those ugly fish things.'  You snickered to yourself while Kuroo plugged in his phone to the AUX, glancing up at you before unlocking his phone.

"What so funny?" He asked in a monotonous voice, eyes glued to his phone as he scrolled through Spotify trying to find a suitable playlist for the current mood.

"Ohhh, nothing." You smiled to yourself while looking out the passenger window watching other people slowly filter out of the parking lot.

Kuroo shrugged as a response before pressing play on his 'Bad Bitch' playlist and tossing his phone into the cupholder. Immediately after, his right foot pressed down on the clutch, using his left hand to switch the gear into 'R' before placing the same hand on the back of your chair to get a better view while backing out. You watched him shift into first gear as he slowly exited the parking lot, the purr of his car staying steady. After sorting through the mess of cars, he merged onto the main road continuously shifting up and down passing all sorts of cars in order to get to your guys' destination quickly.  

You looked out the side window, watching Kuroo drive through the city, flashing neon lights blurring past you. As if the moment wasn't already perfect, 'Boss Bitch' by Doja Cat came on. You and Kuroo shared a small knowing glance as he turned the volume all the way up, bass booming through the busy streets of Tokyo as you both began to scream the lyrics at the top of your lungs. Kuroo started to accelerate even faster, adrenaline pulsating through you guys' veins. You looked over at Kuroo, his eyes fixated onto the road, still singing while he pressed down on the clutch once more, shifting into second gear while turning into a little parking garage located across the street from your destination. Finding the nearest available spot you two hastily jumped out, stomachs taking control of both of your bodies as you two raced across the street trying to get to the little shop as fast as you could, and lucky for you two, there was no one inside.

"Yes!" You breathlessly cheered, taking a moment to crouch down and catch your breath.

"Pfttt, you good?" Kuroo spazzed out laughing at your hunched-over figure, clutching his hands over his stomach in the process.

"Why-huh- quite your - laughing." You panted, breathe coming down your throat cold as ice, burning your esophagus. while your face burned with heat, your cheeks flushing a red color.

"I GOT ASTHMA ASSHOLE!" you shouted, as you weakly punched his shoulder, still trying to get the air into your lungs. Unlike you, Kuroo was the captain of the volleyball team, constantly running laps across the gym, moving back and forth, and jumping. Of course, he didn't trip over his breath or break a sweat. 'GGHrrrR' your stomach decided to wail out as you meekly looked up at him, cheeks reddening even more. Kuroo looked down at you, face laced with amusement at your little tantrum, causing you to playfully punch his shoulder.

"Don't look at me like that! You're hungry too!" You exclaimed, patting down your cheeks to get the redness to go away. Kuroo opened the door for you, but before you could even enter the smell of fresh pork and miso filled your senses, as you entered the warm atmosphere of the small ramen shop you and Kuroo frequented.

"Ah! My favorite regulars, how are you guys?" A sweet middle-aged woman came out from the kitchen. A blob of brown hair sat on top of her head wrinkles pulling at her cheeks, giving you and Kuroo a bright smile.

"Ahh hi, Ms. Sato!" You greeted, Kuroo following with a little wave.

"So what are you two doing out this late at night." She said suggestively wiggling her eyebrows. Ms. Sato has always been under the impression you and Kuroo are dating, based on how close you guys are. No matter how many times you assure her you guys aren't, she still doesn't believe you.

"We actually just graduated, so we came here to celebrate," Kuroo replied.

"Awwww, how fun! Your foods on me tonight, you guys want the usual?"

"Yes, please! Thank you!"

"Of course, you two just sit tight, it'll be ready in a bit." She said, a little jump in her voice as she skipped into the kitchen.

_________________

"Ahh, I'm stuffed!" You exclaimed, sitting back on the bench and holding your stomach as if you had a baby.

"Yeah, I can tell." Kuroo teased, glancing up at you through half-lidded eyes.

"OH SHUT UP!" you exclaimed turning around and hiding your stomach from his view.

"Oh, Kuroo" Ms. Sato cooed, as she made her way over to the table you two were bickering at. "Don't treat your girlfriend like that." You gave her a mini glare, your eyes telling her ' Why would you do that  '

"You're right Ms. Sato, I shouldn't be treating my girlfriend like this. Sorry Y/n," Kuroo said, his cat-like eyes starring into your soul as his smile curled up even more.

"See Y/n you can't keep lying to me about your secret relationship forever." Ms. Sato said, eyes also starring at your soul.

"I-But, - Well-I, wait-"

"Aw I think she's getting tired Ms. Sato, I'm gonna take her home," Kuroo said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Ok sweetie, make sure she gets there safe, don't drive too fast." She said, her momma-bear side kicking in.

"Yes, I will" Kuroo reassured as he stacked up your dirty plates while grabbing onto your waist and hoisting you onto his hips. Your brain did stop working, as Kuroo had said. Your words failed you earlier so you decided just to keep your mouth shut and let the embarrassment eat you away.

"Bye, my little love birds!" Ms. Sato

"Bye, Thank you for the meal," Kuroo replied before jumping a bit to re-adjust you further upon his hips.

"I hate you." You murmured in his shirt, as your senses were filled with his cologne and his button-up shirt. You started to fondle with his tie as he walked across the street and entering the parking garage. He carefully set you down on the concrete floor before opening the passenger door to his 2015 re Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution. As soon as you sank into the seat, Kuroo shut the door before striding over to the driver's side. You lazily yanked your seatbelt out of the holder and plugged it into the buckle as Kuroo jumped in, the following suit. You watched as he got situated, plugging his phone into the AUX and scrolling through his Spotify. He finally selected a song but instead of tossing his phone into the cup holder, he handed it to you.

"Huh?"

"Put on some music you want, only after this song though," Kuroo said with a genuine smile curling at his lips.

"This is new, You never let me have AUX."

"Consider it a congratulations on graduating." He said.

"But you graduated to- Y'know what nevermind." You said with the most perplexed look dancing across your face. Kuroo let out a deep chuckle while pressing down on the clutch, turning off the E-brake and shifting into reverse. You felt the rumble of the car underneath your feet as he pulled out of the parking spot, quickly slamming onto the clutch once again and shifting into first gear while exiting the parking garage.

"Remember what Ms. Sato said!" You teased, referring to Ms. Satos' request for him to drive slowly.

"Yea yea." His gravelly voice came out slightly exasperated. Kuroo  hated  driving slow, just like he  hated  losing volleyball matches. He's one of those guys that has to win at everything, whether it be in the classroom, on the court, or in the street. Instead of looking out the window, you decided to watch Kuroo, how his hands grabbed onto the gear shift, how he revved the car at every stoplight to 'assert' his dominance (at least that's what he thinks of it). Lil Uzi's   XO Tour Life  came on as he sped through the streets of Tokyo, entering Narima city, where both your houses resided.

"My house tonight?" Kuroo asked, turning down the radio.

"Sure."

"Ya need anything?"

"Nah I think I have stuff over there from last time." Kuroo hummed in response, as he downshifted again, turning into his neighborhood. He stayed in first gear while slowly creeping through the quiet neighborhood, trying to keep his car as quiet as he could. The soft rumble of the car was almost like a lullaby, as it was slowly pulling you to sleep. He parked in the street next to his house, pushing down the E-brake and untwisting his keys from the ignitions, unplugging his phone before looking over at you. Your head was leaning back on the leather headrest, your whole body relaxed. Kuroos' lips pulled into a soft smile as he stared at you ' so beautiful...'  he thought before unbuckling his seatbelt and jumping out of the car, careful to not slam the door.

He walked with a little hop in his step as he came to open your door, he carefully bent over you to unbuckle your seatbelt. Slowly, he picked you up out of the seat, now holding you bridal style as he walked around the door, closing it with his back and locking it. Now walking towards his front door, he inserted a different key and nudged it open. Using the same technique he did with his car, Kuroo shut the door with his back then mindfully walked upstairs pushed open his door, and laid you on the bed only to be met with your tired eyes.

"Heh, thanks." You croaked, throat facing the punishment of all the yelling and excitement from the hours prior.

"Of course," Kuroo said, a loving tone laced through his words, eyes softening as he got up to shut his door. It surprised you really, you and Kuroo really weren't dating, or at least haven't made it official.  I've never even kissed the guy, yet we act like a married couple...'   You thought, face scrunching up, as you concentrated on your thoughts ' No wonder Ms. Sato thinks were dating-'

"Whatcha thinkin' about?" Kuroo asked

"us." You answered plainly, still half zoned out in thought. Kuroo walked into the closet, picking up two pairs of sweatpants and two shirts.

"What about us?" His voice muffled from the distance.

"Just what Mrs. Sato said, y'know about us dating. I mean we kind of act like we do." You said, watching him walk out of the closet and to one of his dressers.

"Would you wanna date?" His voice sounded a bit guarded as if he were scared of what the next words would be. There was a short pause while he shuffled through his dresser, find a pair of panties you left here.

"Here, my mom washed these from last week."

"Oh, sweet thanks." There's the issue, you two were comfortable with each other. If it was some other guy and girl I'm sure the girl would be screaming right now, but no you two were different, in a good way. You slipped off your dress, completely fine with Kuroo looking, yet he still turned away.

"Haha, why do you still turn away when I get dressed, I told you it was fine remember?" You asked, slipping your bra off and grabbing the black D.A.R.E. shirt Kuroo gave you.

"It just feels wrong I guess." He spoke, voice strained.  'Is he nervous?'  You quickly changed your underwear and pulled up the grey sweats.

"Why? oh, also I'm done." Kuroo opened one eye, quickly glancing behind to see you dressed. He let out a small sigh as he turned around.

"Because I love you and it would just feel weird y'know" You looked at him. Hair even messier than usual, the top three buttons of his shirt were undone, as well as his tie hanging loosely around his neck.

"To answer your question from earlier Kuroo, I would date you!" Honey laced your words as you walked towards him. Slowly reaching your arm out towards his tie, you grabbed onto it making his head come down to your level. Kuroo gazed into your eyes, a genuine smile playing at his lips, eyes flickering down to your lips before meeting your eyes again.

"Fuck you Tetsurou, making me feel shit." You whispered, flicking his forehead and yanking his tie forward causing your lips to meet. Secretly this is your first kiss, so although you looked cool and composed to Kuroo your mind was on the brink of jumping off a cliff. The kiss was sweet? No, it made you feel happy? Like you wanted to run a mile. ' Stupid hormones.'  You pulled away, due to lack of air only to be met with one of Kuroos' shittiest grins.

"Mmm," Kuroo hummed. "You like that?"

"Oh stop being a dick." You rolled your eyes in a teasing way before giving Kuroo a little push and waltzing over to his bed. He took off his tie, unbuttoned his shirt, and looked over at you, like a little puppy waiting for its owner to throw a ball.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" You giggled, hand covering your mouth.

"can I change?" You started laughing, even more, your other hand flying over your mouth trying your best to contain your laughter.

"Whattttt?" Kuroo whined out, folding his arms and turning his head. "I just wanted to make sure your fine with it."

"I- hahaha- It-It's fine." You spat out, trying your best to breathe.

"y'know what, I'm just gonna change in the bathroom." He smirked walking his petty ass out the door.

"w-wait Kuroo!" You gasped out, crawling on the bed and reaching your arm out. "p-pl-please! I can't!" Your breaths became shaky as you struggled to suck in the air. Legs giving out as you curled up on the bed, shaking grom your suppressed laughs. Kuroo slyly sneaked back into the room, unbeknownst to you and...

"BOO!" Kuroo's deep voice boomed in your ears as he touched your waist.

"AH!" You screamed falling off his bed and onto the floor, still writhing from your continuous laughs.

"STAHP! STAHP! YOUR TORTURING ME I-I- CAN'T!"

"HAHAHA!" Kuroo laughed beside you, finding your reaction so adorable. As you calmed down, finally controlling your breathing again you looked off to see Kuroo, still half-dressed on the floor next to you with half-lidded eyes, staring into yours.

"You like what ya see?" You breathed out, letting a little giggle pass your lips.

"Yea, I fuckin' love it." Now it was Kuroos turn to be bold. He grabbed onto your shirt pulling you on top of him and held your cheek in his hand before grabbing your jaw and pulling you down to meet his lips. This time though, the kiss was different, it was filled with love and something else, yet you couldn't quite put your finger on it. 'Stupid hormones...'   Your hands traveled up his chest, meeting the expensive fabric of his button-down shirt.

As your hands continued to move up, your fingertips met his soft skin, before wrapping your hands around his neck and combing your finger through his dark locks. Kuroo slowly moved his hand from your jaw to the back of your head as well, only he tugged at it a bit, causing you to squeak out of surprise which was the perfect time for Kuroo to slip his tongue in. So he did, tongue entwining with yours, claiming you for the second time that night. The heat of the kiss spread through your body, fast like electricity quickly filling all your senses until you heard the door squeak... You jumped up, heart beating out of your chest as you looked over at the door, ' Shit I thought Kuroos parents were out...'

"Fukuuu~?" Kuroo spoke in a baby voice underneath you. A loud sigh escaped your mouth.

"What? did she scare you~?" Kuroo teased as Fuku, Kuroos black cat walked over to you, placing her two vanilla bean paws on Kuroos check before climbing onto his chest.

"Damn what's up with you guys all up on me, am I comfy or somethin'?"

"Very." You giggled out before shifting and laying your head on Kuroos stomach since the cat currently occupied his chest. You let out a content sigh, snuggling closer into his stomach. Kuroos' hands crawling up your back before combing through your hair once again.

"I love you Kuroo."

"I love you more Y/n."

______________

"Oh my fuck that hurts," Kuroo whined. You two eventually fell asleep on the floor, accompanied by his cat. Evidently, you and the cat slept great, but Kuroos neck, on the other hand, was suffering greatly from sleeping without the support of a pillow.

"Aweee I'm sorryyy~" You cooed, slowly massaging his neck, trying your best to relieve the pain. "- if it makes ya feel any better, I haven't slept better in years."

Kuroo looked at you with an are-you-serious face, before his features became washed out with love, eyes softening as his lips curled. He pulled you into a quick kiss, before pulling away and replying,

"I'm glad.

[patchwork-panda]

If A Moment Is All We Are (25/?)

AO3 link: HERE

A note: 

There's a lot of music that I think would be EXCELLENT in parts in this arc so I'm including the links here first (if you want to have them loaded up and ready)  Where to start and stop will be indicated with asterisks (* for start, * for stop)

Music 1 (*): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_4nESyjxjIM&t=2626s&ab_channel=MobaSavage<br />

Music 2 (**): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_4nESyjxjIM&t=3224s&ab_channel=MobaSavage<br /> Music 3 (***): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eDuTS0V_qGg&t=193s&ab_channel=MobaSavage<br /> Music 4 (*): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HtUi8o_wAc0&ab_channel=MusicLover

Akutagawa...

I took a small, shaky step back.

“W-what are you doing here?” I managed to ask.

I hadn’t seen him in the vision. How was this happening?

“The President of this company owes us a very large debt,” Akutagawa answered, surprising me.

He let out a soft, quiet cough.

“A very large debt that he hasn’t been paying back as of late.”

He took a step forward and I took another one back.

So it was true. That money in that account really was being set aside for the Port Mafia...

“I’m here,” Akutagawa continued, “to collect. And I was instructed to take the thief with me if I found him.”

His cold gray eyes settled on me.

“I assume it’s not you.”

I felt my lips twitching upwards in a nervous smile.

“So does that mean you’re going to let me go?”

Akutagawa’s eyes narrowed.

* Two solid black tendrils slowly rose from the back of his coat and I had a split second to run before they shot out towards me.

One hit the ground where my foot had been just a second earlier, carving a tiny crater into the concrete and sending chunks of rubble into the air. I dove behind a nearby compact car just in time to avoid the second and threw my arms over my head as it punched a hole through two of the windows, shattering the glass. Sparkling, green-tinted shards rained down all around me like snow, the car alarm blaring painfully in my ears.

Guess that was a “no...”

Glass cascaded off my shoulders as I moved, my elbows scuffed up and my ears ringing from the wailing of the alarm. Getting into a half-crouch, I whipped my head around to spot the next attack. Surprisingly, none came, but before I could look for a way to escape, something dark glimmered at the edge of my vision—something huge...

I looked up.

High above the car, pulsating with crackles of blood-red electricity, was an enormous black scythe. Without warning, it dropped down like a massive guillotine and I threw myself out of the way as it sliced through the car behind me.

I hit the ground hard, my body smacking painfully against the concrete, but before I could fully push myself back up onto my elbows, I thought I heard a dull creaking and groaning over the wailing of the car alarm. Glancing over my shoulder, I saw the black blade in the middle of the car shuddering like a live creature, molding itself into something new before my eyes.

“Rashoumon...”

With a sound like a massive tearing of fabric, the blade split in two down the middle, transforming into a pair of black claws. As each of them bit into one side of the car with a solid metallic crunch, I scrambled to my feet.

“Murakumo.”

I raced away, making a break for the next car—for the next hiding place—as a metallic shriek echoed throughout the half-empty garage and Akutagawa tore the car behind me in two. Ducking down behind a small, gray compact, I got up on my knees and put my fingers against the door, peering through the windows at the man in black. Cold sweat ran down my back as I watched Akutagawa pry yet another car apart with his Ability and fling the pieces to opposite corners of the garage.

“Come out, Prophet,” he called, stepping through the space he’d just cleared, his living cloak billowing behind him as he moved.

One of the mangled cars behind him suddenly exploded, but Akutagawa barely flinched as he continued forward.

“You’re just delaying the inevitable.”

I watched, trembling with fear as he walked down the center aisle of the garage: a pitch-black silhouette etched in stark relief against a backdrop of dancing orange and yellow flames. Two black claws re-emerged from the back of his long coat and floated up, high above his head, poised and ready to strike at the merest hint of a movement...

I ducked back down behind the car again as Akutagawa spoke, his cold voice ringing throughout the room.

“You should give up now while I’m still in a good mood.”

I heard a sharp, metallic crunch and glanced to my left, where one large black claw had wrapped itself around the back end of the car I was hiding behind. There was another crunch, and I snapped my head to the right to see the other black claw sinking into the front of the car. The car alarm blared to life as I bolted for another hiding place, sprinting as fast as I could as Akutagawa lifted the car high into the air and threw it aside.

There was another horrible crunching noise; I saw the car being slammed into a nearby row of vehicles, pushing them all together like the folds of an accordion and compacting them against the wall. I dropped to a crouch behind a large SUV and tried to catch my breath as another round of explosions shook the basement.

This was Akutagawa in a good mood?!

Suddenly, black claws crashed down on top of the SUV. I let out a shriek and took off running again as they flattened the vehicle from above and shoved it through an empty section of parking lot, the metal screeching against the concrete like a dying animal. I managed to hurl myself behind a large van just as the SUV slammed against a wall far away with an echoing crash.

“I’ll say it again,” Akutagawa called out, sounding more irritated this time. “Come quietly and I’ll make sure you get to the Boss in one piece.”

“How generous of you,” I gasped under my breath.

Huddled against the side of the SUV, chest heaving with exertion, I pulled out my cell phone, which had miraculously stayed in my pocket, and flipped it open.

I had to call someone. Preferably somebody who had combat experience or had fought Akutagawa before. There was no way I could take him on my own and if I wanted to avoid being captured by the Port Mafia this time, I needed help.

I could feel my hands shaking as I pulled up the address book and I cursed when I accidentally dropped the phone by mistake.

Dazai’s phone number glowed up at me from the floor.

“Shit.”

A familiar, inhuman shriek filled the room and I snatched my phone off the ground, clutching it to my chest. My eyes darted about for the dragon-headed beast with the blood-red jaws—the monster Akutagawa had sicced on me the first time, the monster that was sure to come screaming around the corner any moment now.

“Rashoumon!”

I braced myself.

“Kumo no Ito!”

‘Spider Threads?’

I heard a creaking sound above me and looked up to see what looked like a black cage made out of thick, crackling wires crashing down from the ceiling above.

I dove out of the way, somehow avoiding being caught inside. But I still wasn’t quick enough...

One of the black wires sliced into the side of my ankle on its way down and I cried out in pain as my shoulder collided with the concrete below. My phone was still squeezed tightly in my hands and as I groaned and sat up to look at my bloody ankle, I heard the dial tone, followed by a click. The voice that called out was fuzzy with static—had I actually called Dazai or someone else...?

“Hello?”

“It’s Kyou! I need help!” I shouted into the receiver, not caring who was on the other end, “I’m downtown—basement level five—”

My eyes went wide as I saw reflection of the cage reforming above my head.

“SHIT!!”

Tucking my phone to my chest, I rolled to the side as the cage plunged down towards me once again. I felt one of the black tendrils nicking the side of my cheek and part of my ear as it came down but I didn’t stop rolling until my back collided painfully with the hubcap of a car in the next space over.

Breathless and dizzy, I staggered to my feet, grabbing the side mirror of the car for support. Blood streamed down the left side of my face, mixing in with the sweat and spattering my phone with thick, red droplets.

The call seemed to have ended but before I could hit redial, the cage retracted from the ground with an audible crunch of concrete against spikes.

The black tendrils withdrew, condensing back into that blob-like mess of shadow streaked with red. A familiar triangular head began to take shape, clouds of darkness condensing into spikes around a wide, angular mouth...

Fear, pure and undiluted, coursed through my veins as Akutagawa reappeared from around the side of the gray compact. He raised one pale hand and extended his fingers outward, towards me.

“Rashoumon.”

Clutching my phone in my hand, I turned and ran for my life.

“Agito.”

There was a deafening roar. I sprinted forward, weaving around cars, motorcycles and other obstacles, blood soaking wetly into my shirt and the back of one of my socks. I couldn’t outrun him—I knew that, but I also knew that his orders were to bring me in alive and as long as I took advantage of that, I might be able to make it out in one piece.

Maybe.

Car alarms erupted all around me, a cacophony of squeals and whoops that were abruptly silenced by the crashing of metal, Rashoumon’s otherworldly howls echoing in my ears as it tore through each and every obstacle between it and me. I ran for the wall of pillars on the far side of the garage, for the exit sign I could now see glowing high above in the corner. I could feel Rashoumon bearing down on me, coming closer with every screeching crunch, every flipped car...

I glanced over my shoulder to see scarlet-lined jaws stretched wide, a gaping maw filled with rows and rows of needle-sharp teeth—

Something caught against the toe of my shoe. For one brief, horrifying second, I was airborne...

My cell phone flew out of my hand.

“No...!”

It arced through the air, the thin, rectangular device rotating end over end in slow motion... flying further away from my outstretched fingers with each individual flip...

“Kyou—” a voice shouted frantically from the other line, voice muffled with static, “Hang on, I’m—”

Wind rushed through my hair from overhead. Rashoumon surged forward, clipping the ends of my bangs.

And with one devastating roar of wind and sound, it devoured my phone.

A single thought echoed in my head as I hit the ground.

Backup would not come in time.

Wincing, I looked up in time to see Rashoumon sailing over my head. It collided with the ceiling near the flashing green exit sign with a thunderous crash, sending chunks of rubble the size of boulders falling all around. A cloud of dust blew towards me from the corner of the garage and I shielded my eyes, coughing as it passed. When I opened my eyes again, I could no longer see the bright green light.

Rashoumon had destroyed that part of the garage, breaking a hole open between this level of the basement parking structure and the one above it, burying the door behind a wall of broken concrete and shattered pipes.

There was a dull creak and I glanced up at the hole in the ceiling to see the wheels of a large black car sliding through the jagged opening. There was another long, shuddering creak, followed by a distant rumble and the rest of the concrete around the car crumbled, letting it through. It smashed against the wall of rubble with a resounding crash and instantly burst into flame. **

I was trapped.

“There’s no escape.”

Akutagawa was close. I could hear it.

Hissing in pain, I struggled to my feet once more and limped for the nearest hiding place I could see—one of a row of concrete pillars on my side of the garage. I tucked myself behind the nearest one, the concrete cold and dusty against my back as Akutagawa spoke again.

“There is only capture... or death.”

I gritted my teeth, every cut and bruise on my body making itself felt as I peered around the edge of the pillar at my opponent.

There had to be a third option—had to be! I couldn’t afford to think otherwise.

A sharp, acrid smell filled my nostrils as I stared at the man in the middle of the clearing, the monster tethered to his cloak swiveling its massive head around the room, searching for its prey: me.

As it turned in my direction, I stepped back behind the pillar again and tried to quell the panic rising in my chest.

Okay, stop.

Breathe...

Think... what would your mentors do in this kind of situation? What would Kunikida do?

I frowned as I realized Kunikida’s Ability would let him generate weapons. I’d seen him go toe-to-toe with Akutagawa already the day he’d rescued me. If he were here instead of me, he could make as many guns, grenades or tasers as there were pages in his notebook—something I couldn’t do.

I took another shuddering breath in and leaned back against the pillar, flinching when I felt the cut Rashoumon had slashed against the top part of my head when it had passed over me. Blood slowly trickled down my scalp.

If I couldn’t do what Kunikida could do, then...

I bit my lip.

What would Dazai do?

The sharp, pungent smell suddenly intensified and I pinched my nose shut with my fingers and turned away as my eyes began to sting from the fumes. But as I stepped off to the side, I heard a quiet splash and looked down to see what I’d stepped in. It was a puddle of some kind, a puddle of clear, foul-smelling liquid—one with an oily, rainbow-hued film floating across its surface.

I let out a tiny gasp.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_4nESyjxjIM&t=3224s&ab_channel=MobaSavage

** Gasoline.

“Come out,” Akutagawa repeated, a note of irritation slipping into his voice, “and I’ll make sure someone delivers a message to the Agency for you. That way they’ll know not to come looking for you.”

Gasoline... There was gasoline everywhere, all throughout this garage. Akutagawa must have ripped apart half of the vehicles in here to get to me, tearing through enough of the gas tanks to allow pools of gasoline to gather on the floor. Somewhere out there was a pool big enough to set ablaze.

I just needed a lighter...

And then I saw it.

Gleaming behind the windshield of a nearby black van, perched neatly on top of the dashboard next to a half-empty pack of cigarettes... was a small, orange plastic lighter. And to my immediate right, a piece of rubble the size of a brick.

I felt my pulse begin to race.

“Clock’s ticking, Prophet,” Akutagawa snapped. “I’m losing my patience.”

Dazai was crafty. Dazai was insane... But Dazai could walk away from an encounter like this without so much as a single scratch.

I stared at the lighter in the window.

Akutagawa’s Ability manifested in the form of his coat. If I could set the coat on fire, would he still be able to use Rashoumon?

“I’m going to count to three. If you don’t come out of there by the time I’m done, I’m taking your leg.”

If I wanted to walk out of here alive, then I would have to do something just as underhanded as Dazai would.

“Three... Two...”

I was going to have to burn that cursed black coat off Akutagawa’s back.

“One...”

I felt a rumble. A piece of concrete broke away from the edge of the hole in the ceiling and as it crashed down into the pile of debris, Rashoumon looked away.

It was my only chance.

Snatching the brick-sized piece of rubble off the ground, I pelted towards the black van and hurled the rubble with all my might into the windshield. The car alarm blared to life as the windshield smashed into a spiderweb of shards and I plunged my fist through the newly opened hole, grabbing the lighter just as Akutagawa sent his monster charging after me.

“Rashoumon! Gokumon Agito!”

I wrenched my hand back out of the wreckage, broken shards of glass slashing deep, jagged cuts into my jacket sleeve and arm, and ran back into the center of the garage—towards the biggest pool of gasoline I could find.

I was in luck.

As Rashoumon zigzagged towards me through the parking structure, I saw the flickering of electricity, where one of the fancy hybrid cars Akutagawa had wrecked was lying on its side with some of the circuitry exposed. It was lying directly above a virtual lake of gasoline.

I dashed towards it, Akutagawa’s monster hot on my heels.

“Fool!” Akutagawa spat. “You think you can outrun me?”

I didn’t bother to answer. Instead I vaulted over the hood of the sparking car and kept running. Ripping off a piece from the end of my shirt, I came to a stop several meters before President Tanaka’s car, turning around just as Rashoumon ripped through the front end of the sparking car like it was made of wet cardboard. I somehow managed to dodge the attack, but not completely—Rashoumon still took a chunk out of my right shoulder and a scream ripped out of my throat as I felt it gouge deeply into my flesh.

Blood poured from the wound, drenching the front and back of my jacket. My shoulder pulsed with pain and when I reached up with my left hand to staunch the flow of blood, I could feel the bone underneath. Gritting my teeth, I struggled to remain standing as Akutagawa appeared at last, his face contorted with cold fury.

“You must really want to be torn apart,” the dark-haired young man whispered, walking forward through the piles of debris.

I watched, heart pounding as he stepped into the middle of the pool of gas, right beside the sparking car, undisguised annoyance written all over his pale, bloodless face.

“But it looks like I won’t have to.”

His gray eyes narrowed as he spotted the enormous piles of wreckage and debris behind me, momentarily staring beyond me at the wall of flame ringing the edges of the parking garage.

“You’ve got nowhere left to run.”

“No...” I breathed, ignoring the ache in my shoulder as I wrapped the piece of torn cloth over the lighter. “I’m done running.”

I flicked my thumb over the silvery wheel of the lighter and a single tongue of blue and yellow flame sprang to life in my hand. It spread to the cloth.

“And you’re the one who’s got nowhere left to go.”

I hurled the burning lighter at the sparking car.

Akutagawa’s eyes widened.

“Sh—”

He didn’t get to finish his sentence. **

Flame met spark and in the blink of an eye, Akutagawa disappeared, engulfed by the ball of heat, light and flame that suddenly erupted from the sparking car. His scream of rage echoed in my ears as a massive shock wave, generated by the mushrooming explosion, knocked me off my feet and launched me backwards through the air...

Heat seared my arms, legs and face. Wind rushed through my hair and clothes as I flew, pushed back by the powerful force of the explosion I’d caused. I wrenched my eyes shut against the blast, trying to shield my face even though I could tell from the dull aches and stings that the exposed parts of my shins and even the tip of my nose had already been burned.

Without warning, I slammed into something solid—no, something hard and metallic that completely buckled under my weight with a hollow, ringing crunch—a dull ache of a sound that shuddered through my entire body like a physical wave.

“Aagh—!”

Blood and spittle flew from my open mouth, my eyes wide with shock as all the air was forced out of my lungs at once. I saw more blood and bits of shattered glass flying away from me, past my face, like glimmering droplets of ruby and diamond, sparkling and twinkling from the light of the inferno just ahead. My head settled back against a bed of shattered glass and torn-up leather and I finally registered that I had been thrown into and halfway through somebody’s car—and with such force that the passenger door had crumpled in with me.

For a moment, I lay there, completely breathless and unmoving, watching blearily through half-lidded eyes as the wreckage of the sparking car burned before me. Thick black fumes choked the air, floating up towards the ceiling from the blaze. In the flat fluorescent lighting of the parking garage, the wreck seemed to glow like a miniature sun—no, a funeral pyre, I realized abruptly.

I’d burned Akutagawa alive...

As I lifted my head a little to stare out at the lake of gasoline—the lake that was now burning in the middle of the underground parking garage like a sea of flame, I felt something between my shoulder blades snap. The pain that followed a heartbeat later was unbearable.

“Hh...!”

White-hot knives pierced through my shoulders, midsection and back. My mouth was already open but I couldn’t scream—there was no air in my lungs and even if I wanted to cry or shout out or something, I knew instinctively that if I did, the pain would only intensify. So I lay there, whimpering softly, tears gathering in the corners of my eyes, with the upper half of my body resting on a warped car door and my legs dangling uselessly outside the vehicle.

My phone had been destroyed. Akutagawa was probably dead. The car bomber I’d caught earlier... I let my eyes drift towards the side of the garage that I had come in from. Relief flooded through my body as I realized it had been practically untouched. In trying to intimidate and capture me, Akutagawa had focused his efforts on tearing apart the far end of the garage, leaving the bomber handcuffed safely to a section of pipe near the elevators at the front of the chamber.

I took a single, shallow breath in, wincing when it came with another sharp stab of pain. The air rattled noisily as it settled into my collapsed lungs and as I stared blankly up at the ceiling, I realized I knew whose car this was.

It was a black BMW with tinted windows. One of the newer, fancier models that didn’t have a traditional key and keyhole but instead required the driver to push the ignition button while the key was inside the car.

This... was the car President Tanaka and his driver were going to get into.

This was the car with the bomb underneath it.

And I’d just spotted the tell-tale glint of the key inside the open glove compartment.

I couldn’t stay here.

Groaning, I tried to prop myself up on my arm and push myself out of the vehicle. But while my arm wasn’t sticking out at any wrong angle, I knew when I tried to put my weight on it and promptly collapsed that it was definitely broken.

I closed my eyes and let out a sigh that sounded more like an agonized wheeze.

All I could do now was pray that whoever had been on the other end of the line would be coming for me... and that they would come before an errant spark landed on this car and sent me into the stratosphere.

“Rashoumon...”

That single word was all the warning I got before two lines of black came streaking towards me from the blaze. I gasped, my head snapping back painfully as the black ribbons wrapped themselves around my neck and tightened, pushing me back down into the broken seats.

“Tenma Tengai.”

No...!

I clawed at the ribbons with my left hand, pushing myself up with my right so I could try to get some air.

He’d survived? How?!

I watched, gasping and writhing in pain as Akutagawa, the man attached to the ribbons, slowly emerged from the clouds of smoke and flame. His black coat was completely gone—replaced by ribbons of black and red that criss-crossed over his entire body and wrapped around him like an exoskeleton. Strips of black cloth bound his hair and face, making him look something like a cross between a ninja and a mummy. They covered everything except his eyes, which burned with an intensity not unlike that of the blaze he’d just escaped...

No, not a mummy...

As he marched towards me from the middle of the garage, I could see two angular horns protruding from the top part of his head—ribbons of cloth twisted into shape by what had to be his Ability.  

He looked like a demon walking out of Hell...

His entire ensemble glowed red with some kind of mysterious power. I struggled to sit up some more, to make use of the stabbing pain in my ribs to try to stay awake, I understood immediately what had happened.

So that was it...

The true nature of Rashoumon was cloth; that’s why the attacks were always coming out of his coat. Akutagawa’s Ability was one that could turn the very clothes on his body into blades and send them flying at an enemy.

How versatile...

“I’m not sure whether to call you ‘brilliant’ or ‘an idiot,’” he said.

I let out another shallow gasp as Akutagawa’s grip around my neck tightened.

“Thinking to burn my coat so that I can’t attack with my Ability was pretty smart,” Akutagawa acknowledged, stopping just before the toes of my singed shoes. “But then again, not factoring in that you yourself would be caught up in the explosion you created...”

Piercing gray eyes glared down at me as I twisted about, trying in vain to free myself.

“...that was stupid.”

This was it. I was going to be captured. Akutagawa was going to keep choking me until I passed out. Then, he was going to take my mangled, unconscious body back to the Port Mafia headquarters, back to his boss, where they’d do who-knew-what else to me for who-knew-what reason...

I never got to tell Kunikida-san how I feel...

I won’t see him, Kirako-san, Yosano-sensei, Ranpo-san or any of the others ever again... and even if I did, I might end up having to fight them instead...

Tears leaked out of the corners of my eyes and I took in another labored, shuddering gasp.

I should’ve told Dazai I was going to be here. I should’ve told him the truth... that I forgive him, that I…

Gritting my teeth, I squeezed my eyes shut. I felt the side of my cheek stinging dully as a tear dripped down the side of my face.

Why hadn’t I said anything?! Why??

“Why...?” I found myself whispering.

“Why?” Akutagawa repeated, sounding surprised. “Your Ability grants you precognitive visions. You honestly can’t think of a single reason the Port Mafia would want to make use of an Ability like yours?”

He scoffed.

“Unbelievable.”

I was fading. My body was losing strength. My legs kicked out reflexively and a violent spasm tore through my arm; it smacked painfully against the steering wheel, instantly producing a sensation like an electric shock that ran down the length of my body.

The steering wheel...

Wait a second...!

The keys were still in the glove compartment. From what I’d seen in my vision, it seemed the bomb was supposed to go off when the driver turned on the ignition and took his finger off the button. And since Akutagawa and I hadn’t been blown to bits yet... the bomb was still active.

Sorry, Kunikida-san, Dazai-san...

Gingerly, I reached up for the ignition button.

Thank you both... for everything...

I heard a click. The button sank down under my fingers and I held my breath.

But this is the only way...

Noticing my movements at last, Akutagawa frowned. His voice dropped in volume.

“What are you doing?”

“Ending this,” I gasped.

I coughed and struggled to prop myself up against the steering wheel. My arm was going numb.

“It sounds like you know what my power is,” I croaked, “Well, you don’t know everything.”

Despite the aches and pains, I smiled, an expression that was more like a grimace of pain than an actual grin.

“I’m here,” I whispered, “because I had a vision... You see... the person you came to collect from? He was supposed to get into this car. Right about now, in fact. But he’s not here right now... and he wasn’t supposed to make it out. Wanna know why?”

Akutagawa’s eyes narrowed and I felt my grin widen.

“Because there’s a bomb under this car. The keys are in the glove compartment and the gas tank is full.”

With a considerable amount of effort, I tilted my head to the side, towards the depressed ignition button.

“And it’s set to blow the moment I take my hand off this button.”

Upon hearing my words, Akutagawa flinched. He didn’t take the ribbons off of my neck but I felt them loosen just so and I sucked in what little air I could and let out a quiet laugh.

“Your money’s gone, Akutagawa-san. I couldn’t tell you where it went, even if I wanted to. But I can tell you this.”

I felt my smile wobble.

“I’d rather die than be captured by the likes of you. And if I’m going down... I’m taking you with me.”

For a moment, we were both quiet. I could only hear the dull roar of the flames dying down around us in this scorched concrete wasteland of a parking structure. And then I heard a cough—no, not a cough, a scoff.

The ribbons loosened just a little bit further around my neck and as the spots in front of my eyes faded, I could see Akutagawa standing there, a weak breeze blowing through his hair, his face colder and more impassive than ever. He spat out a single word.

“Pathetic.”

Huh?

“The boss’s orders to me were very specific,” he stated. “He said I was to bring you back if I believed your Ability would be useful to us. Well...”

The ribbons fell away from my neck entirely and I collapsed with one shoulder against the steering wheel, coughing and gasping to bring as much air into my lungs as I could possibly stand. I had to struggle to keep my fingers pressed against the ignition, not wanting to let go unless it meant I’d be blowing Akutagawa up along with myself.

“I no longer believe it is. Or rather...”

The ribbon-like armor around his body vanished and he was standing before me in that black long coat and white cravat once more.

“It’s more accurate to say that I don’t think you would be useful to us.”

He stuck his hands in his pockets and turned away.

“When they told me an Ability User who could see the future had appeared once more, I was set on capturing them at all costs,” he said, walking away. “I thought, perhaps, this was the second coming of Oda-san. After all, we learned several years ago that two people with similar Abilities can exist at one time. Why couldn’t his Ability reappear now, after his death?”

Oda-san? Who was that?

“But you’re nothing like that man.” Akutagawa sounded disgusted. “Oda-san took out an entire battalion of soldiers before his demise. He would not be so willing to give his life over a battle as trivial as this. He did not fear death or slaughter.”

He stopped walking away and turned to give me one final, cold glance.

“But he also did not seek them out.”

I could hear his footsteps echoing away from me. Only when they faded away entirely did I dare breathe again.

I’d done it...? Had I just won?

I heard another crack and felt another sudden, sharp stab of pain in my ribs as yet more bones splintered inside my torso and I let out a pained, hacking cough. At least my back wasn’t broken—the searing pain all up and down my entire body assured me of this.

I felt my fingers, growing damp from sweat, slipping down a little against the ignition and with a heavy groan, I forced more of my weight onto it.

I had to hang on. Now that Akutagawa was gone, I could feel an odd sense of hope. My attacker had just abandoned me to bleed out and die here on my own. Perhaps if I just hung on long enough, someone would come...!

But who...?

Time slowly began to pass. Spots reappeared before my eyes. Red and black and yellow and green. I tried to shake my head to clear my vision but the spots barely faded from view. Now that the danger had finally passed, the adrenaline was wearing off. It was only a matter of time before I passed out and let go of the ignition button.

And when that time came, I would be blown into the next life.

I shifted again, hoping the old strategy of using pain to shock myself awake would work once again. Sadly, the pain felt duller, the effect lessened and I slumped against the smashed in car door as I felt my body giving out at long last.

No good. I couldn’t wait here any longer.

I was actually going to die...

A soft crunching sound reached my ears. Someone had crushed a piece of glass nearby. As I strained to listen for more, there was another crunch, coming from somewhere much closer than before.

The car door behind me suddenly opened.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eDuTS0V_qGg&t=193s&ab_channel=MobaSavage

*** Warm fingers pressed over mine, keeping the button for the ignition pushed in and as I craned my neck up to see who my rescuer was, I saw an upside-down face—the handsome face of a man with shaggy brown hair and intelligent brown eyes. Bandages were swathed around his neck.

Dazai.

“Yo!” he chirped, grinning toothily at me. “Your knight in shining armor is here.”

“Dazai-san?” I whispered as he reached over and accessed the glove compartment. “What are you doing here?”

“Oh my goodness, really?” Dazai sighed.

He reached into the glove compartment and retrieved the keys.

“You called me. Remember?”

“That was you?” I asked, wincing a little as I accidentally moved my neck to look at him. “The person I dialed while Akutagawa was attacking me was you?”

“Correct~!” Dazai sang.

“But you were in Nagano,” I stammered, “How did you get here so fast?”

“Well, I was planning to stop by Matsushiro Castle on my way back,” Dazai drawled, “Maybe get my cute case partner a nice little souvenir but then I realized I had the best souvenir in my pocket the whole time!”

He held something up in front of my face and I had to blink a trickle of blood out of my eyes to see that he was holding up a USB drive.

“I found CORVID,” he said simply. “And I got them to give back the money.”

I stared at it for a second. Then, I let out an incredulous laugh.

“And here I thought you were going to say something lame like, ‘the best souvenir was Dazai-san the whole time,’” I chuckled, flinching a little when I felt my ribs cracking again.

“Oho...”

Dazai leaned in then, so that his nose was barely two centimeters from my own.

“So does that mean you see me as a prize worth attaining, Kyou-chan? If that’s the case, you know the way to my heart.”

Taking the USB drive away, he dangled the keys before my eyes.

“You know what I’m talking about,” he whispered, his voice dropping low. “I take your hand in mine, off of that flimsy ignition button and we can be together forever in the afterlife.”

He shook the keys so that they jangled noisily and flashed in the light.

“What do you think?” he whispered, eyes darkening until they looked as black as coals. His voice took on a supplicating tone.

“Come away with me?”

I bit my lip.

If my arms weren’t broken, I swear, I would’ve slapped him in the face...

My eyes narrowed.

“Fuck off, Dazai.”

Dazai sighed. Heavily. Then he shrugged and tossed the keys over his shoulder and out of the car. Only then did he take his hand off of mine.

No keys—no ignition—no explosion.

I relaxed.

“Yeah, you’re right,” he admitted, pulling me from the wreck at last as I gritted my teeth to keep from screaming. Even though I was a hair away from passing out, I could still see that my clothes were singed and my body bloodied, battered and bruised.

“Not romantic enough,” he decided, nodding a little, more to himself than anyone else. “I should at least take you out on a proper date first, if we’re going to be committing a lovers’ suicide—”

“Dazai-san.”

He stopped talking as he heard the seriousness of my tone.

“Before he left,” I mumbled, “Akutagawa-san mentioned something about people with the same Ability. He mentioned someone named... Oda-san.”

Dazai twitched. He stopped dragging me away from the car.

I groaned as he placed me flat against the concrete, then picked me up beneath the arms and gently laid my head into his lap.

His coffee-brown eyes suddenly looked somber as they stared into mine from above.

“Do you... Do you know who he’s talking about? I mean...”

I wet my lips, which suddenly felt as cracked and dry as my voice.

“You did seem to know Akutagawa-san from somewhere before, after all...”

“Oda-san... huh...”

As the name of that mysterious man crossed his lips, Dazai’s expression became unexpectedly wistful, his eyes now staring beyond me, at something far, far away. He smiled softly.

“That’s not a name I’ve heard in a long time,” he said quietly. “I’m surprised that Akutagawa remembered it.”

“So you know who he is?” I pressed. “Can you tell me about him?”

“I could,” Dazai mused, tapping his chin. “I wouldn’t mind telling you what I know about the man named Oda-san...”

His gentle smile became a smirk.

“So long as we’re talking about him over coffee.”

*** I closed my eyes and sighed again.

“Again with the jokes. Thanks but no thanks, Dazai.”

I mustered a glare.

“Shimeko-san at the Cafe told me about your tab. I’m not paying for you.”

Dazai laughed.

“Oh, so you knew about that,” he chuckled. “Oh well.”

As I lay there thinking about the mysterious “Oda-san,” I began to realize just how heavy and leaden my limbs were starting to become. Dazai’s lap felt oddly warm and comforting beneath my head and I could feel oblivion tugging at the corners of my vision. Closing my eyes, I shifted a little so that I was more comfortable and I let my bangs fall across my face as I began to drift away.

“Rest, Kyou-chan. The car will be here soon.”

The last thing I felt before I floated off into blissful, dream-like darkness was Dazai’s large bandaged hands smoothing back my bangs.

“You did it.”

[your-highnessmarvel]

Don’t Be Afraid

Requested by Anon: Could you please do an imagine where the reader asks Tom Hiddleston to help her get over her fear (like, panic attack fear) of public speaking?

A/N: All these Hiddles requests, gaaah, I’m loving it! I’m writing this based on the one panic attack I’ve had, so limited experience. Sorry in advance.

Warnings: 

*gif not mine

(Tags at the end)

Enjoyed this and want more? Send in your requests!

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MASTERLIST

You loved acting. You loved to become someone else, to envelop yourself under someone else’s skin. 

It permitted an escape; a little breath of air from your own flesh. 

But the one thing that made your skin crawl was that you had to appear in front of the public on numerous occasions. You had to give interviews on panels. You had to give speeches for women’s day. You were invited to award shows, and when you won, there was an expected speech.

And now, another rally for gender equality. Another moment where you’d have to be the center of attention. Even though you never minded it behind a camera, public speaking was your fear.

Your phobia. 

You’d always felt the attack coming before; the shakes, the breathlessness, the sticky flesh. You’d fell through the darkness. Your speeches after were always muddled, as if you were speaking in water. But these attacks were never as bad as this one. 

It’s like the floor had opened up under your feet, swallowing you in one breath. Your lungs constricted, air becoming impossible to inhale. Dark blobs blurred at the edges of your vision. Your skin felt icky, sweating, your palms wet as you felt your body fall. Brittle knees hit the floor. 

Unable to breathe.

Unable to see.

You could feel your heart everywhere; in your rib cage, beating vivaciously, in your throat, in your ears, on your tongue. Blood roared through you as if a thunder storm had started in your veins. 

You could hear the world around you as if in a tunnel; blurred and lazy, as if everyone around you was drunk. 

All you could think about was; I’m going to die!

There was no air coming to your lungs, to your blood. Your heart was beating too fast. Your hands shook like leaves in the wind. 

You were going to die behind the curtain of the gender equality march! 

And then there were warm palms on your shoulders, searing through the thin material of your sundress. His fingers were soft, gently coaxing the tension from your muscles. 

“Hey, hey.” He was whispering closely to your ear, low, afraid to push you deeper into the darkness of your panic. He rubbed your back slowly, barely grazing you, like you were fragile. “There’s nothing to be afraid of, love.”

“I’m dying,” you whined, breath barely wheezing passed your teeth. Your heart was throbbing so painfully in your throat, that you reached up to claw it open. You needed to breathe! You needed your heart to stop beating so fast! “I can’t see!” you exclaimed. 

Tom took your hands in his, softly bringing them to his chest, kissing the knuckles. “Don’t be afraid,” he continued. “Just breathe, Y/N. And when you can breathe, we can leave. You don’t have to stay here. I can take you back home.”

Home. 

The thought brought back a memory. Behind your tightly shut lids, through the tears welling in your eyes, you saw the grey sofa of your living room. The paintings on the wall. The dimly lit bathroom in the corner. 

“Breathe, Y/n,” he cooed softly, warm hands on your back again. “Don’t be scared. It’s just temporary. Then, I can take you home.”

The backs of your lids burned as you opened your eyes, still seeing nothing but blankness. You felt around the ground with your trembling hands until they had latched onto Tom’s shirt. “Breathe,” he said. 

Your lungs constricted as your gripped his shirt. Breathe. Don’t be afraid. Think of home. 

A shaky breath came through your lips. Your lungs seemed to sing with relief, goosebumps freckling your flesh.

“Good,” Tom said. “We can leave. Will you leave with me?”

You nodded. “Y-yes,” you squeezed out, letting another gulp of air reach your screaming lungs. 

“You want to go home?” he asked, tone impossible patient and soft, hands rubbing your bare arms. 

“I do,” you said. You hadn’t realized, but every word was accompanied by a breath, which in turn brought your lungs slowly back to peace and your heart beat to normal. It still thud in your ears. You could still feel your blood pulsating through every vein, but your vision and hearing were coming back in leaps. The feeling of dying was sweeping away like smoke in a gust of wind. 

“Are you able to stand, darling?” he cooed. 

“I am.” He held you steady; one arm around your shoulders, the other holding your hand. 

“We’re going home, alright?” he asked. “Home.”

“Yes,” you answered, leaning against his chest. He smelled of rosemary and wood smoke. He was comforting. The roar in your ears had settled. Your heart was thudding slowly within your rib cage. Your glassy eyes were now focused on your adjoining hands, but were open and visibly working. You could hear and touch and smell Tom, which was all that mattered to you. 

You were out of the dark tunnel. He looked down at you, gazing with his sharp blue eyes, and smiled. “Home.” 

tags: @fluasch @emegeek @papi-chulo-bucky@thatcrazybookwormgeek@white-chocolate-mocha-fan@ironmanlover24

[nurseyleafs]

let me feel my pain in private

read it on ao3: here

The music is pulsating, throbbing, and Derek feels it in his veins. The threat of a headache looms, but he dismisses it into the haze of the night, surrounded by an endless sea of dancing bodies. He downs the rest of his tub juice before Dex has the chance of coming back. He lets his shoulders sway to the unchanging melody of the song and does his best to not bash into someone and spill any more drinks. The music changes tempo and speed a few times before Derek realizes he has gone probably an hour without someone checking up on him. He thinks it's Dex's duty tonight? He wrinkles his nose a little bit, not yet drunk enough to not be embarrassed of the concept of Nursey Patrol. However he is drunk enough that his thoughts are getting lost in the clouds of his mind. He tries to shake away the fuzzy feeling that's numbing his brain, and makes his way to the kitchen for some beer. More tub juice might kill him. He certainly doesn't need that, nor does he want that weighing on Dex for being shitty at watching him. He finds Lardo standing guard over the keg, and her handing him a fresh glass should count for something. Maybe his friends could be a little bit less overbearing. He hasn't broken anything in at least a couple days. Although they do have a point when it comes to Drunk Nursey. The prospect of re-entering the room where the sounds are the most blaring suddenly disinterests him, and he aims for sitting quietly in the hallway. He's managed to slink down to a kneeling position against the wall without knocking over his beer and he's quite proud of himself when he hears shuddering breaths from above him.

The one who is supposed to be keeping track of him, is curled up into a tight ball on the top step and is about ten seconds from tears. Dex's face is scrunched up so tightly that his freckles look like blobs and his hands have turned white from the tension they're holding onto the soft red flannel Dex is always wearing. It's taking too long for it to register what's happening in Derek's brain, but he starts silently making his way up the stairs anyways. The last step before he reaches Dex elicits a horrible shriek but Dex makes no notice of it. He carries on whimpering and tightening his shoulder muscles. Derek eases himself down and carefully places a hand on Dex's back.

“What do you need me to do,” he says softly.

“Nothing,” Dex barely gets out. He's waving for Derek to leave, but his own experience is nagging at him to push just a little further.

“Dude I- I swear I'm fine. 'M just waiting for the bathroom to be open, that's all.”

He's doing his best to turn away from Derek, towards the mysteriously stained wall.

“Bro, there's other bathrooms. I doubt people would care if you used theirs, or hell, if you just need to calm down you could probably chill in Chowder's room.”

Derek quirks his eyebrows up. A stream of protests fall out of Dex's mouth.

“God, I'm just being whiny- I do not need Chowder walking in on me. I'm okay I just can't fucking breathe and want to puke I need a minute-”

Warning signs are flashing through the fog of Derek's mind and immediately took over.

“Nope, this is happening.”

Derek grabs Dex's waist and he crumples. With a little strain, he manages to get both of them to their feet and Dex moves without complaint. He rushes to Chowder's room and pushes the door open just enough to check if there are bodies inside. All clear. He shoves Dex onto the bed and sits down beside him, staring intently at him.

“Alright, can you focus on your breathing? In and out. In and-”

Dex scoffs. “If I could, maybe.” A look of shame rolls across his face. “Can you leave now, please?” He's almost begging.

“I don't want to leave you alone yet, man. You were practically in coral reef mode,” Derek quips. He returns to making eye contact with Dex and it seems as though no time has passed since then.

A moment hangs in the air between them as Dex stares at his grey converse.

“Nurse, I'm trans.”

“Okay.”

“Like, I'm a transgender man. Female to male-”

“No, I got it. Is this an issue with your binder or something?” Dex is a little taken aback.

“Fuck man, most people need a minute,” he chuckles, “I sort of do.”

Derek studies his face for a second. He's not inspecting it for anything, just enjoying how the disgusting amount of turquoise in the room gives him a strange sort of glow. His mind was blank. It's not that the word went right over his head and wasn't processed, but it didn't alter any thoughts he had ever had. He almost wants to conjure up some memory that could suddenly be explained away, but nothing stands out in his brain. He feels kind of bad that this was anti-climactic for Dex.

“You know, I'm well-versed in this stuff.” This gives Dex a sincere smile. “So, you should probably get out of that binder, then.”

“I wasn't kidding when I asked you to leave, Nurse. I'm not showing you my chest.”

“Don't assume I have any interest in seeing your chest. I'm sticking around for safety purposes,” He turns around and pokes at a Sharks bobble-head.

“Yours or mine,” Dex chirps.

“Both.” The bounce of the bobble-head is forceful enough to knock over a signed hockey puck. God damn it. He hears struggle behind him, followed by a soft and meaningful 'Fuck.'

“Do you need a hand?” Derek singsongs.

Silence.

“...yes.”

Derek whips around to see Dex facing away from him, completely entangled in tan fabric. His arms are extended awkwardly and the fabric has bunched in such a way that he can tell it's painful. He swiftly readjusts the hem and lifts it off of Dex's torso to reveal a masterpiece of purple and green bruises along his ribcage. Shock stains his face.

“Dex, you have to be more careful.” He slaps himself mentally, knowing that came across as patronizing.

“I'm fine, those are old bruises,” Dex says, pulling back on his flannel and snapping the buttons in place before turning to face Derek.

“No, dude. I know what I'm talking about. You have to let those bruises heal or you'll fuck up your ribs and organs. This is serious shit.”

Dex ignores Derek and makes his way over to the bed. He unceremoniously flops down, and fixes the pillows to his liking. It has yet to dawn on him. Maybe he's been too subtle. And maybe he's still a little drunk as his best idea is to take off his own shirt.

“Oh my god, do you think you're getting lucky? What are you doing-” Dex laughs, but mixed with confusion and fear. Derek recognizes that fear. He pushes the thought down as he drops his button-down from his shoulders to the floor, his top surgery scars on full display.

“Now you have to listen to me. I have been stealth for so many goddamned years now and I almost didn't qualify for this surgery because I pulled your stupid shit all through high school. I know how much it hurts either way, but don't put that binder back on, Will.”

Suddenly he feels very sober. He approaches the other side of the bed, where Dex is much calmer, and plops himself down so their faces are three inches apart. With a grin, he sprawls out and reaches around Dex to entrap him. Fake attempts at slaps are made on Dex's part.

“What are you doing,” Dex shrieks, “Oh my god, stop!” His words are betrayed by the tremendous smile spreading from ear to blushing pink ear.

“I've decided we are best friends now, you can't help it. Accept me.”

Dex gets a good shove against Derek's shoulder, but not enough to leave a mark. “Uhh, this is offensive. You can't decide we're best friends because we're both trans. I won't allow it.”

The wrestling settles down after a few seconds so Dex can catch his breath and Derek doesn't accidentally punch him in the sternum.

“You know, we actually are best friends now, right?” Derek lets on a serious tone.

“Shut up,” Dex groans back. Derek's face is met with a pillow being slammed into it.