#loser idiot dawdling

[h-didanart]

It’s silly time

———

Writing type: multiple parts, drabbles I guess?

Story: SAMS au- Get in losers, we’re family now

Setting: some town near some forest in Utah

Characters: Hunter’s Bloodmoon and Harvest’s Bloodmoon

Seriousness: Nah

Canonicity: Questionable

Inspiration: so you know that one trend in the dca fandom of making the dca have period cramps?

———

“So you know what I said?”

“Sucks to suck?”

“Nnnnoooooooo…. Okay fine, yes, I did say that”

“I figured. And about the fire?”

“Oh yeah, that, I just watched it”

“Watched the Shark-One tire—“

“—as the flames transpired! Indeed, indeed!” Hunter giggled to himself, bouncing from one foot to the other.

“The pure terror on its eyes was something quite amusing!”

Harvest huffed in agreement, “I can imagine so, but just as much as a chewing out though?”

“Yeah, the idiots weren’t very happy ‘bout that,” Hunter grumbled, kicking their feet, “it wasn’t even my fault the fire started!”

“But you did plainly stand there as it spread”

Hunter glared at his twin, “are you siding with the Swiss Cheese Cracker?”

Harvest just looked at her twin, “I’m offering an explanation of future logics not to tread”

“Ugh, whatever” Hunter shook their head, wincing a bit.

“Still got that odd pain?”

Hunter hummed, swinging his arms a bit as he walked.

“I swear I cleaned that ham well”

“How well if it was off the ground?”

Hunter rolled their eyes, “live a little”

Hunter whined, his walking stopping. Harvest stopped as well, watching as their twin stiffened in what they assumed to be discomfort.

“It’s a mile and a half walk to the camp, better not dawdle less the intensity ramp,” Harvest pat her twin’s back, “‘sides, you’ve walked on harsher conditions, aren’t I right?”

Hunter sighed, a small grimace on their face, “you are, probably, hell if I know if it actually was the ham,” he chuckled, “we’ll have to ask Cheesy when we get back”

And so the twins walked once again, for about twenty feet.

And then Hunter stopped again, air pushing harshly out of their vents. Harvest immediately turned to their twin, watching with growing concern as he lowered himself to the ground.

“Ar- hm- I don’t- what’s the onset for food poisoning???”

“I… don’t know”

“Cool, great, cool, cool, fUck,” Hunter hugged themselves.

Harvest kneeled down next to him, voice box starting and stopping repeatedly.

“Hhhhow bad is it?”

“Bad, bad bad, vERy bad bad”

Harvest nodded, placing a hand on her twin’s shoulder.

“Is food poisoning the only possibility?”

“I don’t know?!” Hunter yelled, “St-stomach ache of some sort!”

Harvest just repeated the word ‘ok’ over and over as they thought of what to do. She led Hunter to lay on the ground, putting the bags they both had been carrying to the side. Hunter clutched at his stomach, very clearly in pain.

“I’m dying”

“You better not”

“I’m dying here”

“If you die I’m going to kill you”

“Tell my story”

“I’ll tell the story of the several times you’ve face planted on a door,” Harvest snapped, several emotions swirling around their head, “now quit being dramatic while I call dad”

“But it’s funny,” Hunter whined as the pain lessened a bit.

Harvest glared down at her twin.

“If you’re not in threat of death I will slap you with a goddamn tree trunk”

Hunter just blinked at that before curling up on themselves, already feeling the next wave of pain. Harvest huffed and turned back to the physical phone in their hand.

[ser-rctslcyer]

younger me would surely get a heart attack and would throttle me if they knew how much time i invest in ships.

[risukadarlin]

[yuugen romantica] vol. 2: zakuro - track two

2; a suspicious looking older student

listen along (to end)・masterpost

                                                                             ✿

Oi, hurry up and get on with it.

Oh? You? You’re that girl--

What? You don’t recognise me?

Well, I’m human now, after all.

Nothing.

More importantly, what are you dawdling for?!

You’re annoying me.

Huh?

You put your money in but the ticket won’t print?

The ticket vending machine here is kinda old.

And, oi!

Look, if you kick it it pops right out.

This is your ticket, right?

Don’t thank me, just move.

Hey ma’am. 

The usual, kitsune udon.

What?

You’re getting the same.

Huh? Well, I guess.

It’s not bad for school food.

Not that I mind as long as I get deep-fried tofu.

Why does that matter anyway?!

Don’t talk to me like we’re friends.

Thank you for the foo-

Why are you sitting next to me?!

Huh?!

I guess all the other seats are full…

Whatever, then…

It makes it easier for me to figure out if you’re keeping your promise.

Hey.

Do you like ghosts and spirits?

I heard a rumour recently.

Apparently loads of idiots are daring each other to sneak into the school at night and run around like stupid people.

Huh? You were dared too?

And?

Did you see something?

You didn’t see anything?

So you are trying to keep your promise, at least.

Just ignore losers like that.

The ghost in the science lab must be getting pissed off with all these low-intelligence fools disturbing his sleep.

Enough talk.

Eat before your food goes cold.

I’m gonna eat.

What are you looking at me like that for?

You’re gonna give it to me?

Give what to me?

Huh?

Your tofu?!

Are you sure?!

I mean, I don’t need tofu from someone like you.

Well, if you want to thank me for helping with the machine so badly then I don’t mind eating it for you.

Tch. If you insist then I can’t refuse.

It’s so good.

What is it? Don’t stare at people when they’re eating.

It tastes best after it’s just been made.

Deep-fried tofu in piping hot udon is the best thing on earth.

The ones people leave as offering are usually dry as hell.

I didn’t say anything!

You hurry up and eat too.

You know, you’re talking to me normally but--

Aren’t you scared of me?

Most people call me vulgar or cold and avoid me.

I’m not scary?

I can’t tell if you’re weird or just thick.

Huh? I’m not making fun of you.

I just think you’re a strange human.

Thanks for the food.

That tofu was enough thanks so now we’re even.

I said, you don’t need to thank me.

We’re even.

Bye.

                                                                              ✿

The science lab really is best when it’s quiet at night.

It only needs to be lively during the day.

That girl I met at lunch was so weird.

I can’t tell if she’s honest or just has guts.

She might be a human but I’m glad she’s keeping her promise.

Huh? What the hell?

They’re so noisy.

More idiots doing dares?

Why are there so many students?

Shit.

I need to hide.

Huh? What did they say?

Why do they know there’s a real ghost in here?

No way…

That stupid girl told everyone?!

I’m an idiot for trusting a human for even a second.

I’ll show her what happens when you betray me.

                                                                              ✿

Finding you was a real pain, you stupid woman.

Don’t you know why I dragged you into this empty classroom?

It’s because I need to talk to you in private.

You…

You told everyone you met a ghost, right?!

Don’t play dumb.

The only person I showed myself to that night was you.

Did you forget that I told you I’d turn you into a will-o’-wisp if you told anyone?

That’s right.

I’m the fox spirit you met in the science lab, Zakuro.

You stupid woman.

More and more people keep disturbing my sleep because you started spreading shit.

Humans are always like this.

They betray you so easily.

Just like I promised, I’ll have you take responsibility.

You.

I’ll kill you.

Don’t tell me to stop.

You reap what you sow.

Blame angry at yourself for betraying me.

You still plan on feigning innocence? Then…

I’ll just have to stay here until you feel like talking.

There’s no point in running.

You’re already trapped by my magic.

Are you shocked?

I can close myself.

Foxes are known for their enchantments, after all.

Both of us are the real me, by the way.

You can feel me running my hand along your back, right?

What? You’re shaking?

How cute.

But I won’t let you go even if you cry and beg for forgiveness.

I’ll make you regret ever betraying me.

You still won’t admit it?

Even if I run my nails along your neck?

Doesn’t it send a chill down your spine?

I might eat you right away.

Being tortured by the both of us like this…

You might lose your sanity.

If you weep and apologise to entertain me, I might just let you live.

Now, be a good girl and own up.

You won’t admit it no matter how much I threaten you, huh?

If it wasn’t you then who was it.

I see.

Bring me the people that you did the dare with that night.

They’re the only people other than you it could be.

I don’t care how you do it.

Just say you want to hang out here or something.

They’re idiots who’ll sneak into school at night.

They’ll come right away if you say that.

I’ll explain the rest when they’re all here.

I’ll possess you and find the real culprit.

Okay?

I’m not very patient.

Don’t forget that.

[wonderland-in-bloom]

suspicions ?!

[savanaclaw boys x big sister of jack!reader]

@edgymcmytrash​ asked: Oo good luck with all the requests! Is it okay if i request a scenario where a pretty well known savanaclaw girl student turns out to be jack's older sister. (Like how would the others react, would they figure it out cuz she just started hanging out with him a lot?) I kinda want you to feel free to come up with anything you want with the scenario since it could be fun to have a bit of freedom writing, though if you want me to detail it more feel free to say so.

aaa thank you so much!!! i’ve been taking smol breaks here and there lol sorry if i don’t update as frequently as usual guys! and incoming requests in my inbox will be deleted as it does say requests are closed, sorry!!! hope y’alls enjoy this, i might write something with just the bois tomorrow who knows :)) 

♡

A group of savanaclaw students huddled together, eyeing their junior, jack howl. currently situated in the middle of the savanaclaw magift field, they all exchanged glances with each other, and somehow understood what each other thought about with just their eyes. ruggie noticed this strange little circle. “oi leona-san, check that out.” he pointed out to his senior who was lounging around the bleachers. leona groaned but turned his head anyways. “what a bunch of idiots. what the hell are they doing there?”

curiosity got the best of the savanaclaw dorm leader and he started marching to the group of students huddled up. “oi. what the hell are you losers doing?” he’d expect them or at least one of them to flinch like they normally do, but this time, they just turned to leona and made a shushing motion with their fingers. “what?! how dare you-” one of the students pulled leona and made him join in their little huddle. ruggie was a little curious too so he managed to squeeze himself inside to hear what they were talking about. “what is the meaning of this?! seriously!” one of the students shushed leona. “senpai...have you ever noticed how close (y/n)-chan has become with jack ever since he enrolled here?” now that they mentioned it, leona thought of one scene he saw the other day. it was right after alchemy class and he was about to head to the fields before he saw jack and (y/n) talking to each other before (y/n) gave jack a pat on his head, and his tail wagged non-stop. 

“what do you think they’re a thing?” ruggie asked the group of students. “EXACTLY! senpai do you not see it too?” ruggie put a finger on his chin, trying to recall the moments he saw with the two. he had to agree that the two were very close...but he had a bit of trouble remembering jack and (y/n) acting like a couple. “last week, i saw the two go to mostro lounge together!” one student mentioned. “really?! i saw them go somewhere after magift practice together!” another added. “i think (y/n)-chan fell during practice and he helped carry her to the infirmary!” now the students were just whispering among themselves. ruggie held a blank expression. there was no way you were dating jack. meanwhile, leona was slowly starting to get convinced. you didn’t talk to him as much anymore as when jack didn’t enroll into night raven college yet. “maybe you’re right...” leona muttered to himself.

“right about what?” all the students including ruggie screamed when they heard the familiar voice behind them. “(Y/N)-CHAN!!!” good thing they ended the conversation with silence and leona whispering something barely audible. who would’ve guessed, jack was standing beside her, confirming their suspicions once more. “why the hell are you all out here dawdling instead of training for magift?! don’t we wanna beat royal sword academy’s ass?” you snapped your head to face leona. “and you! come on leona, just try to be a better leader.” he rolled his eyes. “alright alright. everyone start with warmups...or whatever.” leona shrugged, causing you to growl and elbow his arm. “come on! be responsible!” he sighed. being responsible was too tiring. “you want to watch your ass beat by some spoiled, prince-y princes?” you threatened him, putting your hand on your hips. “alright fine!” leona’s voice boomed.

“we’ll be starting with warmups that requires partners. so everyone pair up!” the group of students in the huddle, including ruggie, knew what leona was trying to do. he wanted to see who you would choose and if you did choose jack, what their interactions would be like. leona still got the feelings and the vibes that the two of you are dating...or at least becoming closer. but ruggie...had different vibes. of course you paired up with jack and leona paired up with ruggie. this pained him slightly as you used to always pair up with leona. you’d be nicer to him, even compliment and praise him if he did something well. this was why he concluded you were dating jack. either that or he was just jealous you didn’t spoil him with as much attention as you used to. throughout the whole warmup activity, leona was just eyeing the two of you, along with several other students. ruggie tried his best to rationalize this situation.

although you didn’t show him and leona as much attention anymore, he got the feeling that you treated jack the same way you treated leona and himself. based on his knowledge, he knew you didn’t have a crush on him or leona, and you treated other savanaclaw students similarly. ruggie thought that you even gave off older-sibling-type of vibes. maybe that was it. maybe you and jack were related...“alright time for the main event! i got the teams sorted out!” of course leona placed you and jack together. he was still trying to crack this mystery. ruggie was just standing on the sidelines with a whistle to start and end the game, as he was also in charge of keeping track of everyone’s progress. and of course pay attention to you and jack. that’s basically what all the savanaclaw students were thinking at the moment. head empty, no thoughts, just trying to solve the mystery whether you and jack were dating. 

the high-pitched whistle pierced the air as the game officially started. three students teamed up to try and aim for you and see what jack would do. when you were on your broom midair, standing on top of it with the disk in your hands, they purposely shot the broom to make you topple over and fall. leona’s eyes widened and zoomed on his broom (even if he was on the opposite team). he knew what those three students did and glared daggers at them while speeding for you. he was curious, but he wouldn’t use means that could’ve hurt you. ruggie dropped all his things and started running to the field. jack also positioned himself to where he thought you would fall so he could’ve caught you in his hands. you closed your eyes, preparing for the impact but instead you felt strong arms catch you. “hmph, who’s not taking it seriously now?”

your eyes fluttered open to see green eyes staring back at you. “leona...” he landed safely on the ground and placed you down. “(y/n)-chan! are you okay?” ruggie waved as he was still running to you. “nee-chan!” all of the savanaclaw students’ paused as their ears twitched. “nee..chan..?” you smiled and patted jack on the head. “don’t worry about me, i’m alright.” jack pouted. “but nee-chan...i don’t want anything happening to you, so of course i worry!” all of the students’ jaw dropped. so you two were siblings. ruggie was taken aback for a while before he started chuckling. so his predictions were right after all. “why are you all looking at me like that?” you asked all the boys in front of you as they looked like they all had just seen a ghost. “YOU TWO ARE SIBLINGS?!” they all (including leona) blurted out at the same time. “yes you idiots! what did you think we were?” you growled. “i don’t know?! dating!?” you facepalmed, and jack was just there like a confused, lost puppy. “how stupid can you all be?! did you all forget my last name?! (y/n) howl!? legit the same thing as jack’s! and besides i’m a wolf too! even our tail and ears have similar colors!” they all were quiet. “jeez you all are such idiots!” 

and that day, all the savanaclaw boys (excluding jack and ruggie) came back to their rooms with bumps on their heads and bruises from your...lesson. they also probably had deaf ears after listening to you ramble and scold them about misunderstanding a situation and how you and jack were siblings. all the students from the other dorms stared at all the savanaclaw students like they were crazy. “and i thought you were already ugly. now you’re just uglier with the bandage around your head.” vil commented as leona fiddled with the bandage. “shut up.” he hissed. “serves you right, kingscholar.” you slapped the back of his head, causing him to groan in pain. “okay! okay! i’m sorry! jeez.” 

“this is why (y/n) gave me big sister vibes. shishishishishi.” 

♡

[shewhohangsoutincemeteries]

the simple things

Guardians x Reader

Summary: a purely self-indulgent reader-insert version of (most of) the guardians’ first encounter. (some dialogue lifted straight from gotg).

Characters/Pairings: reader, rocket raccoon, peter quill, groot, gamora

Warnings: minor language, violence.

Word Count: 2,160

marvel masterlist or check out my fanfic dedicated blog

“Xandarians. What a bunch of losers.” Rocket declared, eyes on the monitor in his paws. “All of them in a big hurry to get from somethin’ stupid, to nothin’ at all. Pathetic.”

You rolled your eyes good-naturedly, leaning back on your hands comfortably. You were sitting on the edge of the fountain in the city square, face turned upwards to catch the day’s warmth on your skin. After two weeks in that shitty commuter ship the three of you had hitched a ride on a few planets over, you were completely content to relax and enjoy the sunlight, but Rocket had these crazy notions about getting paid. He’d spent the entire journey talking about making a score, and you’d spent just as much time wishing for the iPod you’d left on Terra those years back. You liked a payday just as much as he did, but you were really sick of hearing about it

“While you’ve got nothing but important, life-or-death plans, right?” you said snidely, a hand raised. With a practiced flick of your fingers a small bubble of psychokinetic energy appeared above you, shining in the sunlight. You guided it higher with a few gentle movements of your hand, letting it float away like a bubble. When it got too high, you’d let it disappear, and start all over again.

“Would you stop showin’ off?” he replied, pointing the tablet at a blonde-haired man walking by, shopping bag in hand.  “Look at this guy! Can you believe they call us criminal, when he’s assaulting us with that haircut?” Without waiting for an answer, he turned it toward a small child, dawdling along the sidewalk with its father. “What is this thing?”

You released your latest bubble with a sigh and followed his gaze, raising your hand to shield your face. You shook your head in exasperation. “It’s a baby, Rocket.”

“Look how it thinks it’s so cool. It’s not cool to get help! Walk by yourself, you little gargoyle.”

You scoffed, rolling your eyes again. You returned to sunning yourself pointedly, kicking a boot up along the fountain’s edge in front of you. The other was planted on the sidewalk. You dipped a hand in the water, enjoying the coolness of it on your fingertips. “Again, it’s a baby. They tend to need a hand every now and then… say, like you after too many drinks?”

“Stop spoilin’ the fun, Y/N,” he said, turning his head so you could catch the edge of his smile. You grinned lazily back. “I mean, look at this. Look at Mr. Smiles over here.” You followed where he was pointing; an old man was cozying up to a much younger woman against a railing, his hand around her waist. “Where’s your wife, old man? What a class-A pre-vert.”

You smirked despite yourself as Rocket burst into laughter.

“Right, Groot? …Groot?” he turned towards the two of you when he got no answer. He gestured in exasperation as he did. “Don’t drink the fountain water, you idiot! That’s disgustin’!”

You coughed a laugh as Groot turned, mouth and hand still dripping, shaking his head.

“Yes, you did! I just saw you doin’ it! Why are you lyin’?” he rounded on you. “Why didn’t you stop him?”

“He’s a plant, Rocket.” you pointed out, leaning forward briefly to pat Groot’s hand reassuringly. He smiled widely at you. “I don’t think it’s gonna hurt him.”

“It’s unsanitary,” Rocket griped petulantly. His ears perked up as his tablet sounded, and he dropped the issue immediately, distracted. You arched your neck to see the read-out over his shoulder. He held it up as it flashed, trying to find a focus. “Look’s like we got one.”

“That was fast.”

He pointed it toward a man on one of the upper streets and you straightened to get a look at him. Good-looking, and talking to a woman. “Okay, humie.” Rocket said, and you paused, eyebrow raised. “How bad does someone want to find you…? Forty thousand units? Groot, Y/N… we’re gonna be rich!”

He sighed as he turned to face the two of you – Groot had his face buried in the fountain again. You barely noticed – your eyes were still on the man, now headed toward a few smaller businesses down the way. “Groot, damn it…”

“Did you say he was Terran?” you asked, curiously. You hadn’t seen someone else from Terra in… you weren’t sure how long. People like you didn’t tend to end up off planet, let alone out of the milky way.

“Yeah, you can swap childhood stories once we got him sedated and on a ship,” Rocket said sarcastically. “Now, would you two focus up. We got a bounty to collect.”

*******************************************************************************************

You watched carefully as the target – Peter Quill (also known to go by the moniker ‘Star-Lord’, according to his wanted listing) – stumbled backwards out of a small pawn brokerage, the ball he’d been throwing around earlier still in hand. You were sitting on a wall further down the way, close enough to keep an eye on him, far enough away to be inconspicuous. An attractive  Zehoberei woman lingered by the doorway – and had been since he’d gone inside – and he stopped to speak to her. You couldn’t hear their conversation, but your fingers twitched as your eyes tracked her body language.

It had changed as soon as he’d stepped outside; she was alluring, and she was laying it on thick. Either she was a hooker, or he was a mark of a different kind. He was just too stupid to see it.

“Rocket, eyes up. I don’t trust this chick.” you muttered into the communicator on your jacket collar, feigning a languid stretch of your arms above your head.

“Keep your shirt on, woman.” he grumbled back. You weren’t entirely sure where he and Groot were, but you knew they were nearby. None of you were willing to let that many units slip away. “We got it.”

“This chick has him marked.” you shot back. “How am I supposed to distract him if he’s already got eyes on her?”

“Oh, c’mon, Y/N—”

“Shit! Move in, NOW!” you ordered, uncaring about your volume. You jumped to your feet, flinging yourself away from the wall. The Zehnobereian had just snatched that thing out of his hand and kicked him in the chest, sending him stumbling back with a grunt. She’d taken off impressively fast through the crowd, and equally impressive, Quill had thrown a magnetic rope after her and followed.

You chased after them, pushing your way through shocked pedestrians as the woman struggled to free her legs where the rope had caught. Quill launched himself at her as she succeeded and she kicked, landing two boots to the stomach for his effort. The two of them fell into a brawl on the pavement, and you were still about fifteen feet away when he reached for the gun on his belt. She trapped his hand with her boot, trapping him beneath her, a knife suddenly in her hand.

“This wasn’t the plan.” she told him, raising the blade above her head. You shoved a gawking woman out of your way, swinging your hands up in front of you to force them apart.

“Rocket!”

He caught the woman from the side, knocking her to the ground. He struggled on top of her as Groot approached, a sack in hand. “Put him in the bag! Put him in the bag!”

You had to stop yourself from rolling your eyes, momentarily distracted, as Groot’s roots began to wind themselves around the woman. Quill was still on his back, eyes wide with confusion.

“No! Not her, him! Learn genders, man!” Rocket shouted, struggling to hold her back as she stood. His claws were in her hair, dangerously close to her eyes, scratching up her face as Groot tightened his hold around her middle. You were trying to find an opening to subdue her, but with her entangled in Groot’s roots, there wasn’t much you could do. While your abilities were an asset, they meant you’d never really needed to be competent in hand-to-hand altercations. “Y/N, a little hel—Ah!” he withdrew a paw. “Biting? That’s not fair!”

“Goddamn it! Groot, let her go, I got it!”

Quill’s eyes flew to you at the sound of your voice,  his forehead creasing for a second before he shook himself and took off, orb in hand.

“Shit!” you cursed again, taking off after him. You wove your way through the throng of people between you, pushing people out of the way with two hands. You just needed a clear line of sight—

“Y/N!” Rocket’s voice brought you skidding to a stop, and you turned to see him thrown from the balcony. The woman had broken free from Groot and had flung him off of herself, and you caught him with a shield moments before he hit glass. It softened his landing slightly, but it would still hurt. She was leaping off the wall to the square below, a sword in hand, and you turned to find Quill at a standstill, orb gone from his hand.

“I guess she’s not in it for the bounty,” you muttered as he launched himself off the upper-street as well, a rocket-pack from his boot in his hand. Groot was gone, and you rolled your eyes, cracking your neck as you ran for the nearest stairs. “Why is nothing ever easy?”

You’d made it to the lower-street just as Groot managed to throw his sack over Quill’s head, and you wiped a hand over your forehead. You panted, catching your breath as you fell into step beside Rocket. “So, what’d I miss?”

“You still got those quick reflexes, doll,” he said, giving you a quick smirk before turning to head down the stairs. He turned to speak to Groot as he went. “Quit smilin’, ya idiot. You’re supposed to be a professional.”

He stopped in his tracks, sobering, as he turned to find the Zehobereian in front of him, soaking wet and sword still clutched in her fist. “You gotta be kidding me.”

She pushed him to the ground without a glance, eyes on Groot. He dropped the sack, backing up a few steps. You flung up your hand as she raised her blade, a forcefield appearing between them and throwing her back a few feet.

Putting you in the middle.

Fury in her eyes, she turned her attention on you, and you grimaced, stepping between her and Groot in the hope she’d be distracted long enough for him to get the payload out of there. Or at least away from her crazy self. “Uh… whoops?”

The woman spun, so quick you didn’t have time to react, her kick catching you in the stomach. The wind left you in a heaving exhale, and your feet left the ground as you were thrown backwards. You landed in a heap on top of Quill – still trapped in the sack – and heard him grunt in surprise.

“Sorry,” you wheezed, hand clutching at your stomach as you struggled to catch your breath.

The woman hadn’t paused, and she cut off both of Groot’s arms and buried the blade in his stomach in a matter of moments. Satisfied he was no longer a threat, she turned and bent down in front of you, opening the sack. She was flung back, body shaking with electricity and suddenly unconscious. You were jostled to the ground as Quill stood, and you coughed a breathless laugh as he shot you a wink and what could have been a flirty smirk before taking off at a sprint.

Rocket pulled the blaster from his back. He spoke to you over his shoulder where you sat painfully on the pavement. “You wanna do the honors?”

“’s all yours,” you replied with some difficulty, waving a hand towards Quill’s retreating back. Rocket grinned, taking aim and setting it to ‘stun’.

“I live for the simple things. Like how much this is gonna hurt.” He fired, and a ball of electricity was launched across the square and straight into Quill’s back. Rocket snickered as he fell to the ground with a shout. “Yeah. Writhe, little man.”

He turned to you with a grin. “Only thing that comes close to that satisfyin’ is when you have ‘em run right into one of those walls of yours.” He laughed loudly, high on success. He stopped short as Groot whimpered, toeing pitifully at his fallen arm. Rocket rolled his eyes. “It’ll grow back, you d’ast idiot. Quit whining.”

You gasped as you were suddenly lifted from the ground, held weightless a few feet from the pavement by suppression beams. You looked up, sighing heavily as you were met with the sight of five Nova Corps ships hovering above you. “Looks like we’re not getting paid.”

“Subject Eight-Nine-P-One-Three, drop your weapon.”

Rocket dropped his gun reluctantly, ears drooping in defeat. “Oh, crap.”

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tags: @lovely-dreamer19​ @spacesuitsforemergency​ @wittyforachange​ @wefracturedmotivation​ @january-echoes​ @glossyloner​ @dragon-chica​

[those70scomics]

Links to the Rest of the Story: Chapter 1, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Outline for the End

Disclaimer: That '70s Show copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER TWO THE HEXAGON

The halls of Point Place High were almost the same as always. Eric's shoes squeaked on the freshly-waxed floors, and students jostled him as he walked. He had no hope of finding Donna in this crowd, but he found his assigned locker easily. It was his usual one, on the second floor. He leaned against it while studying his schedule. He and Donna must’ve had at least one class together. History was first, followed by homeroom, trigonometry, then— His schedule flew from his hands, giving him a paper cut. He stuck his stinging finger into his mouth and glanced at the thief: Neil Roony, the jock otherwise known as Destroy. He ripped Eric's schedule into two and passed it to Jesse Hardin, the jock generally called Giveback. “Aw, that's too bad, new kid,” Giveback said. He returned Eric's torn schedule. “We'll see you around.”

Destroy and Giveback disappeared around a corner, and Eric went in the opposite direction. The history classroom was a flight up, but a mountain of muscle blocked his way to the stairwell: Chuck Dickerson, one of the Vikings' defensive tackles. “Um, excuse me,” Eric said. “Sure, once you pay the toll.” “What?” “The toll. You're a freshman—” “Actually, I'm a junior.” Chuck squeezed Eric's arm, hard enough to hurt. “You're too scrawny to be a junior, and I've never seen you before.” “That's because I'm a new student,” Eric said and glanced around the hall. Hyde should've been here to back him up. Destroy and Giveback were obnoxious, but they targeted pretty much everyone. Eric hadn't been specifically targeted by anyone since Hyde had knocked out … Chuck Dickerson with one punch their freshman year. “Damn,” Eric muttered. He wasn't in that life. He was in this one, where he and Hyde hadn't even met yet. Chuck's greatest weakness was his glass jaw, but Eric couldn't slug him. He'd never put enough power into his punch. He could try to charm Chuck with his sarcastic wit, but chances were slim Muscle Mountain would appreciate it. Chuck flexed his meaty fingers. “I don't got all day.“ Eric sighed. “How much?” “Five bucks.” Eric removed his wallet from his corduroy pants. He pulled out a five-dollar bill, and Chuck snatched it. “Pleasure doing business,” Chuck said and moved from the stairwell. Eric trudged up to the third floor. So far, day one was off to a fine start. “Yes, it is, isn't it?” That was the angel's voice, and white light burst in front of Eric's eyes. When it faded, the angel was waiting for him at the top of the stairs. “Don't take anything that happens during these seven days for granted, Eric,” the angel said and pointed him toward the history classroom. “Don't dawdle, either. You've still got three minutes before class starts.” “Great,” Eric said, “Three more minutes to sit awkwardly as the 'new kid'.” But as he approached the classroom, the back of Donna's red hair shone at him like a beacon. His pulse throbbed in his ears, and he began to sweat. “Any idea what should I say to her?” “That's on you,” the angel said, “but now you've got two-minutes and fifty-four seconds.” The angel vanished, and Eric dashed into the classroom. He narrowly avoided crashing into another student, but the desks on either side of Donna were unoccupied. Maybe it was the angel's doing, but whatever. An opportunity was an opportunity, and Eric slid into the seat on Donna's right. She didn't seem to notice him. She was doodling in her notebook. Eric considered a dozen greetings in as many seconds. His introduction would set the tone for the next seven days. Their first meeting, in his actual life, had been as burbling, drooling infants. They'd known each other practically from birth. Nothing he could say now would beat that, but that was the key: he knew her. She didn't respond well to pick-up lines. She'd want him to be himself. “Hi, Donna?” he said, and she looked up from her notebook. Her blue eyes fixed on him, with no recognition reflecting in them. He really was a stranger to her. “I'm Eric—” His throat clogged with nerves, with the pain of losing her, but he swallowed it all down. “Your new neighbor.” “Um ... hi?” She shook her head slightly, as if she didn't understand what he'd said. “Did you always go here, or are you new?” She clutched her pencil in her fist, and her eyes flicked toward the teacher's desk. “Because if you're not new, I'm sorry for being an ass and having no idea who you are.” She took a breath before continuing. “But if you are new, how do you know my name?” His ears flushed. He'd made his first mistake, but it wasn't a game-ender. He just needed to add some clarification. “No, I'm new, but what I meant to say is—” Two fingers poked his shoulder. He peered up, and Kelso was scowling down at him. “Out of my seat.” “There's another seat right there.” Eric gestured to the desk to Donna's left. “Yeah, but I want this one,” Kelso said. “It has a better view.” Eric looked to his right. Pam Macy was sitting at the desk beside him. “Well, too bad, buddy,” he said, grinning at Kelso. “You can't always get what you want.” “Yeah, I can.” Kelso grabbed Eric's arm and yanked him from the desk. He sat down, put his backpack on top of the desk, and said to Donna, “Who is this loser?” “Eric,” she said. “He's new here.” “Eric?” Kelso chuckled. “More like Smell-ric.” Donna curled her lip, like she didn't find his burn funny, and turned her attention back to Eric. “I'm sorry. Kelso, here, never learned basic etiquette. You can still be my neighbor.” She patted the desk to her left. “If you've got a non-creepy reason you know my name. Otherwise, I'm gonna kick your ass after class.” “Believe me, she'll do it,” Kelso said. “And if she doesn't, Hyde—” She thrust her elbow into Kelso's side, and he grunted. “So, 'neighbor,'” she said, “what's the answer?” “It's to sit down, be quiet, and pay attention,” Mr. Wilcox said. Their history teacher had entered the classroom, and he was notorious for handing out student-alert forms. Eric got his butt into the seat to Donna's left, and Mr. Wilcox nodded at him. “That’s better.”

Class started. Eric, Donna, and Kelso were three rows from the front, but Mr. Wilcox's gaze always caught everything. Eric couldn't risk writing Donna a note, but he wrote some notes for himself. The angel told him not to take anything that happened for granted. If Donna was going to kiss him willingly within a week, every detail counted. The school bell rang forty-five minutes later. Everyone stood from their desks, including Eric, but Donna didn't acknowledge him. She was too busy shoving Kelso away from Pam Macy.

“Move along, dink,” Donna said. “I don't think that new, annoying girlfriend of yours will appreciate you staring at another girl's boobs.” “We've only been together two weeks!” Kelso said. “I get two more weeks to look at other girls. It's in the rules.” “What rules?” Donna pushed him toward the classroom door. “Kelso's Rules for Idiots?” Eric kept his distance as they disappeared into the hallway. Donna already thought he was creepy, and following her would only strengthen that opinion. Instead, he headed for homeroom. It was on the second floor, in the science lab. He still had Mrs. Bridges, the biology teacher, as his adviser, same as in his other life. Unfortunately, so did Chuck Dickerson. “Hey, freshman.” Chuck sidled up to him and, through the sheer size of his body, ushered Eric away from Mrs. Bridges and the other students. “Gotta pay the toll.” Eric sucked in a breath through his nose. “For what?” “Being a freshman in my homeroom.” “I told you before, I'm a junior.” Chuck cracked his fleshy, bulbous knuckles. “Six bucks. I'm charging you an extra buck for the lip.” “Nah, you don't wanna do that,” someone said behind Chuck, but Eric couldn't see past Chuck's mountainous build. The voice sounded familiar, and when Chuck turned around, Eric caught a glimpse of Hyde. “What you wanna do is walk away.” “Why would I do that? ” Chuck said. Hyde was blocked from view again. “'Cause if you don't, you'll be cryin' in front of the whole school.” Chuck laughed incredulously but stopped a moment later. “No—” Eric peered around Chuck's broad back, but whatever detail Hyde had communicated silently, it was finished. “Hey, man,” Hyde said, nodding at Eric, “what's your name?” “Eric — Forman. Eric Forman.” “Yeah, so...” Hyde was talking to Chuck, “you're gonna leave my new pal, Forman, alone, and you're gonna give back any dough you swiped from him.” Chuck laughed again, this time nervously. “I didn't take any money.” “Five dollars,” Eric said. “He charged me five dollars for climbing the stairs.” “I - I was just kidding,” Chuck said, and he plucked a crumpled five-dollar bill from his jeans pocket. “Take it.” He pressed the five into Eric's hand. The bill was sweaty but intact, and Chuck scurried to the opposite end of the science lab. Hyde scoffed in Chuck's direction. “Moron.” “Man, thank you,” Eric said, with a smile that hurt his cheeks. At least Hyde was still Hyde. “How'd you — I mean, what'd you threaten him with?” “Better you don't know.” Hyde gestured for Eric to follow him. Eric did, toward Mrs. Bridges, who was taking attendance. That seemed a little strange. Usually, Hyde liked to stay out of a teacher's eyeline, but Eric took a mental note to write down later. “I'm Hyde,” Hyde whispered. “Guessing you transferred from somewhere.” A whole other life, but Eric said, “Janesville. I'm a junior.” Hyde smirked. “Junior from Janesville. What's your next class?” “Trig.” “Cool. That'll make it easy to keep an eye on ya.” Hyde didn't speak after that. He listened as Mrs. Bridges went through the school announcements, and he stuck by Eric's side as they left the science lab. They went down the hall together to Ms. McGee's classroom. Apparently, Hyde had trigonometry, too. That was different. In Eric's actual life, Hyde had taken geometry during their junior year. “Hyde!” Donna's voice rang through the air. She dashed toward him, flung her arms around his neck, and he picked her up in an embrace. Her feet lifted off the ground, and he didn't put her down again until he'd kissed her cheek. “California sun did you good,” he said. “You're even hotter.” She smacked his shoulder, but she was also blushing. “Shut up. You must've shot up, like, three inches in the last two weeks. You're finally the same height as me.” Eric's throat thickened. Hyde and Donna were still friends, good friends. . “Hyde,” she said, taking his hand, “Fez and I snagged the — well, look who it is.” Her suspicious gaze made Eric shiver, and Hyde said, “You know him?” “Not as well as he knows me.” Hyde pulled free of Donna's hand. He stepped in front of Eric, clutched his belt buckle, and cocked his head to the side. “You some kind of pervert, Forman?” “Wait, did you say say Forman?” Donna shoved Hyde back and took his place in front of Eric. “Oh, my God — that's what you meant by new neighbor. You're my actual neighbor, like, in the house next door.” “Yes! Exactly.” Eric heaved a sigh as her gaze softened. “Donna, I—” Ms. McGee appeared at the door, eliciting an, “Oh, crap,” from Donna. Ms. McGee was a young but stern-faced woman who didn't tolerate goofing around. Donna grasped Hyde's hand again and the cuff of Eric's sleeve, and she led them to four desks in the back row. They were all the way to the left of the classroom, right in Ms. McGee's blind spot. She had a lazy eye, which had allowed Eric and Donna to make-out during class — in his other life. “Who is this?” Fez said. He was sitting in the back row with them, three desks in, and he looked Eric up and down. “My replacement?” “No one's replacin' ya, Fez … yet,” Hyde said and clasped Eric's shoulder. “This is Junior from Janesville.” He hiked his thumb at Fez. “Junior, that's our buddy, Fez. Have a seat next to him.” Hyde meant the seat on Fez's left. Eric didn't object, at least not out loud, but Hyde's intent was clear: he was trying to put as much distance between Eric and Donna as possible. “Angel,” Eric said in his mind, “please give me and Donna some classes without our friends. I need time to talk to her alone.” He waited for a response, even that unpleasant tickle at the back of his neck, but the angel was incommunicado. Eric wouldn't be, though. Being passive in this situation was the worst thing he could do. He wrote Donna a note, an apology for accidentally creeping her out, and folded it up. “Fez,” he whispered, “could you pass this to Donna — and just Donna? Don't let Hyde touch it.” “So, my replacement wants a favor, does he?” Fez said. “And what will Fez get in return?” “My gratitude.” Fez faced forward, toward the front of the classroom. “No deal.” Eric searched his brain for an appropriate bribe, an offer that wouldn't raise questions or make Fez say, “Good day!” “M&Ms!” Eric said. “I'll buy you a bag and bring it to you tomorrow.” “A big bag?” Fez said. “The biggest bag I can find.” Fez broke into a grin, and he took the folded-up note. He reached across Hyde's desk and whispered, “Donna, Donna!” Hyde's hand clamped around Fez's wrist. “Whatcha got there?” “Junior from Janesville wrote Donna a note, but you're not supposed to touch it.” “That so?” Hyde gave Eric a sideways glance and snatched the note from Fez. He unfolded it, read it, then crammed it into his jeans pocket. Donna appeared none the wiser. Her focus was on Ms. McGee, but when she spared Hyde any attention, he didn't mention the note. Eric's hand curled into a fist under his desk. Donna not getting his note was all right. He’d just have to apologize directly, but getting past Hyde was going to be an issue. Eric shut his notebook when trig ended. He'd written a page full of observations. Hyde had touched Donna no less than five times during class, and Donna's reaction to him was generally positive. They were closer in this version of Eric's life. Maybe too close.

Students emptied out of the classroom. Eric tried to get to Donna, but Fez got in his way. “A big bag of M&Ms,” Fez said. “Remember that.” “But Donna didn't get the note,” Eric said, half-distracted. Hyde had slid his arm around Donna's shoulders, and they were walking toward the classroom door. Fez began to argue, but Eric had no time for that. “Never mind. M&Ms. Tomorrow. Yeah.” He moved past Fez and managed to catch up with Donna and Hyde. “So, study sesh after school?” Hyde said to her. “Sure,” she said, and he withdrew her arm from their shoulders. They'd reached the hallway. “Have fun wearing shorts.” “Not wearing the damn shorts.” “But you have such pretty legs,” she said, with the same, playful tone she reserved only for Eric — in his other life. “Get bent.” Hyde bolted down the hallway, and once he was no longer visible, Eric went up to Donna. “Hey,” said. “Hey.” “What was that all about?” “Oh, Hyde has gym,” she said. “What've you got next?” “Study hall … and an apology,” he said, and her eyebrows rose in response. “Donna, I'm sorry for coming off as a weirdo. I should've been more precise about the whole neighbor thing.” Her lips lifted into a smile. “You didn't come off as a weirdo.” “That's a relief.” “You came off as a creepy stalker.” He broke eye-contact with her. Was he the only one with so much at stake here? Or were the students rushing to their classes in a similar predicament? They could've all been fighting to get the loves of the life back — no. This purgatory had been created solely for him. She chuckled. “It's fine. Listen, I've got study hall, too. I'll show you where it is.” Their shoes squeaked in a syncopated rhythm on the floor. Donna had set a slow pace, but Eric wasn't so naïve as to believe it was because of him.

They turned a corner. Study hall was all the way at the eastern end of the school. He'd been silent so far, measuring the risk-benefit ratio of speaking what was on his mind. Going the humorous route might win her over, but he needed more information. “So, you and Hyde, huh?” he said, scratching his wrist. “Me and Hyde what?” His stomach lurched, but he had to keep going. “You're together.” She scrunched her face. “No way. I've known him, like, my whole life. He's more like a brother. ” “He might not see it that way.” “Well, that's too bad.” Blood rushed to her cheeks. “What do you care, anyway?” He put up his hands. “I just don't want to step on anyone's toes. It's hard making friends when you move to a new town — and you seem like a really nice person. But if you and Hyde are dating, he probably won't want us becoming friends.” “Okay, look.” She stopped him a few steps from the study hall. “I'll give you a break today because you're new, but I choose my friendships, not Hyde. Not you. Me.” “Got it — and I'm sorry. Again.” “Good.” She gestured to the study hall, and he entered first. The classroom was full of eight-seat tables, not desks. Students from every grade sat around them. Some had their notebooks out, but the first study hall of the year was usually a free-for-all. Especially with Mrs. Fletcher supervising. She'd been Eric's teacher for Algebra II and geometry, and she let students get away with sing-a longs and all sorts of nonsense. He loved Mrs. Fletcher. “I guess I'll go sit over there.” He jutted his chin toward a relatively empty table. “I'll see you around.” “No, wait.” Donna tugged on his sleeve before he could run off. “I'll go with you.” She moved behind him and gave him a little push. “Hurry, hurry—” He didn't understand her urgency, but he darted to the table. She crashed into his back when he stopped, as if she'd been right on his heels, and she chose a seat with her back to the center of the room. “What was that?” Eric said with a laugh. He sat beside her, and she scooted her chair closer to him. “That was me trying to avoid someone,” she whispered. Her breath heated his ear, and the sensation traveled to places it shouldn't have. “Kelso's girlfriend. She's this obnoxious sophomore, and he keeps bringing her to my house.” “Sounds like fun,” Eric whispered back. “Oh, tons. She keeps trying to be friends with me. But we're, like, total opposites. I care about women's rights and rock, and she cares about popularity and … and makeup.” She shuddered. “I can't take another second of her blabbing about my pores. She's—” “Donna?” a high-pitched, feminine voice said. Jackie was running to their table. “Oh, my God — Donna!” Donna groaned and pressed her forehead to the table. Jackie plunked down in the unoccupied chair next to her. “Donna — a men's T-shirt?” She pinched the material of Donna's gray-and-black shirt. “Why would you wear such a drab thing on the first day of school?” Donna raised her head from the table and gave Eric a look, one that said, “See what I mean?” She was obviously miserable about Jackie's presence, and Eric couldn’t blame her. But this was the happiest he’d ever been to see Jackie. She was his ticket to Donna's friendship. “Say,” Eric said, “aren't you Kelso's girlfriend?” “Yeah. ” Jackie shoved Donna's shoulder. “Donna, sit up straight. We've got to talk about your wardrobe — and your posture.” “Quit it, Jackie!” Donna said, and Eric thanked his luck. She'd said Jackie's name. Now he wouldn't have to be as careful. Jackie smoothed the material of her dress. “I'm doing you a favor! You're a junior now, which means you can mingle with seniors … which means popularity. You have to dress the part.” “I don't have to do anything.” Donna stood and slung her backpack onto her shoulder. “You're being rude, not only to me but to my new neighbor. His family just moved into the house next to mine.” She gestured at Eric. “You're probably gonna see a lot of him, so why don't you get to know him?” Donna's hair bounced against her backpack as she left study hall. She was running toward the door, and Jackie leapt from her chair. “Hold on, Jackie,” Eric said, standing. “Your boyfriend's a cheater.” “What?” Jackie whipped toward him. “What are you talking about?” “I'm—” “Children!” Mrs. Fletcher said from the front of the classroom. “Talking is fine, but please do so while seated.” “Yes, Mrs. Fletcher,” Eric and Jackie said together. They sat down again, and Jackie glared at Eric. He  gripped the edge of the table. Telling Jackie the truth would do triple duty: spare her the heartbreak of being Kelso's girlfriend, spare Donna the headache of listening to Jackie, and score Eric major points with Donna — for sparing her that headache. “Kelso and I had history class together,” he said, “and he spent it looking at Pam Macy's ample chest.” “Oh, that is not true!” Jackie patted her heart. “Michael's in love with me. He told me so last week.” “Trust me on this, Jackie. Kelso is a liar, and he's going to cheat on you the first chance he—” Pain bit into Eric's shin. “Kick me all you want — actually, please don't — but Kelso is — ow!” Jackie had kicked him again. He bent down and rubbed his leg. He was sure to have a bruise, but it would be worth it. “No man would dare cheat on me,” she said and began counting off on her fingers. “First, I'm beautiful. Second, I'm rich. Third, my dad would sue anyone who even thought of cheating on me.” She jabbed his chest. “Tell me where your dad works.” “Why, so you can get him fired?” He covered his chest protectively. The flesh was tender beneath his shirt. Another bruise had to be forming. “Don't kill the messenger.” Jackie pushed herself from the table and stood up. “What do you know anyway? You're new here.” “I just don't want to see … someone as beautiful and rich as you get hurt,” he said. A strange squeak left her throat. Maybe he’d gotten through to her. Or she was suffering synaptic overload, like those androids in that episode of Star Trek. Smoke didn't pour from her ears, but if her brain was going to explode, its chunks wouldn't land on him. He snatched his backpack, raced from the study hall, and didn't look back.

Eric tried to lose Fez on the way to the cafeteria. They'd just spent the last forty-five minutes together in English class, during which Fez passed him notes about M&Ms. Eric's backpack was crowded with wasted paper, but he had no chance to empty it. Fez remained by his side, rambling about candy, even in the lunch line. But Eric's annoyance faded once Donna waved him over to her table. Hyde was already there, sitting on Donna's left side. He made sure Fez sat on Donna's right. That allowed Eric the spot across from her. Kelso, however, was absent, a fact Hyde didn't appear to like. “Jackie's probably got him 'occupied,” Hyde said. “Man, he's gotta break up with her already.” Donna nodded. “I know! She accosted me in study hall, and—” She laughed and pointed at Eric. “And I left poor Eric to fend for himself. How did that go, by the way?” “She kicked me.”  “She what?” Donna covered her mouth and laughed some more. Hyde saluted him. “Welcome to Point Place High, Junior.” “Oh, I would love to be kicked by the luscious Jackie Burkhart,” Fez said. “She is so … luscious.” “She's not luscious, man,” Hyde said. “She's abrasive—” His arm shot across the table, and his hand hovered over Eric's bowl of chili. “I wouldn't.” Eric gripped his spoon. He was the only one who'd gotten the chili. Chicken wings filled Donna and Fez's food tray, and Hyde's had only a bagel. “I know lunch food usually sucks,” Eric said, “but it can't be that bad.” “Yeah, it can.” Hyde moved his hand off Eric's bowl. “Go fishing. See what you find.” Eric stuck his spoon into the chili. Hyde and Donna pounded the table in a drum roll as Eric scooped out a cigarette butt slathered in sauce. “Congrats,” Hyde said. “We have a winner.” “Oh, God, that's right.” Eric dropped the spoon back into the chili and shoved his tray away from him. “Your—” He bit his cheek to shut himself up. Hyde's mom was the lunch lady, but Eric wasn't supposed to know that. In his other life, “Gross” Edna hadn't served him school food in ages. In this one, he'd been so irritated by Fez's candy ramblings he hadn't paid attention. When he’d reached the front of the lunch line, chili plopped into his bowl, and he'd walked away. Donna turned her tray ninety degrees and edged it closer to Eric. “You can share my chicken wings. They were made by her assistant. They're safe … I'm pretty sure.” “Thanks,” Eric said, and warmth spread in his chest as he ate. It was partly from the over-spiced chicken wings, partly from Donna's kindness. If he weren't already in love with her, he'd fall in love with her all over again.

The rest of Eric's school day resulted in an interesting observation — and more than a little boredom. Donna wasn't in his chemistry class. Neither were Hyde, Fez, or Kelso, but Eric had someone to keep him company: Buddy Morgan. Buddy introduced himself first, and the class went by faster than it would have otherwise. Gym was next, a sweaty, torturous set of evaluatory drills with Fez and Kelso. In between huffing and puffing, though, Eric learned where Kelso had been during lunch: searching for Jackie. “I looked everywhere for her,” Kelso said to Fez, loud enough for Eric to overhear. “Being in school is supposed to make it easier to make out, not harder.” “How does it make it easier?” Fez said. “'Cause we're in the same building. We should've been Frenching all over the halls. Instead, I was running through them alone.” Eric grinned. Doing drills made the bruise on his shin hurt, but it was a small price to pay if his plan had worked. Jackie was avoiding Kelso. If that led to a breakup, then Donna would inevitably learn Eric's part in it, and he'd be rewarded. Maybe with a kiss. That thought kept Eric smiling through music, his final class of the day. Like chemistry, it offered no new opportunities. His not-yet friends were elsewhere, and he didn't run into them again in the parking lot. He drove home with the radio on full-blast. Doubt skulked inside his mind, but WFPP's block of Todd Rundgren songs distracted him from it. At the end of “Hello It's Me,” the station's announced a contest, offering tickets to Rundgren's sold-out show in Milwaukee this Sunday.” “Holy crap—” Eric swerved the Vista Cruiser to the right but regained control before he crashed into a lamppost. He pulled over on Pinewood Avenue to regroup. Todd Rundgren — his and Donna's first kiss had happened after that concert. He needed to win those tickets. His parents were still at work when he arrived at the house, and he dragged his tired body upstairs. Homework could wait. He'd finish it easily; none of his classes were new. He'd already been through them in his other life. Sleep came quickly, but a rough hand jostled him awake. His dad was standing over him, scowling. “Your mom's making us meet the neighbors,” he said. “Comb your hair — and try not to be a dumbass.” Red left him, and Eric checked himself over in the mirror above his dresser. He'd slept in his clothes. They were rumpled, and he straightened them out as best he could. He also combed his hair, put on his shoes, and practically flew down the stairs. Finally, he'd get a chance to talk to Donna without anyone interfering. In the kitchen, his mom passed him a plate of brownies. “Now, these are for the Pinciottis,” she said, “so don't touch.” “Got it, Mom.” “Red,” she said, “try to smile.” Red grimaced, and Eric said, “That's as good as you're gonna get from him.” “Watch it,” Red said, and they all left the kitchen through the sliding door. The Pinciottis were already in the driveway. Midge had a pie in her hands, but Bob spoke first. “Hiya, neighbors! I'm Bob Pinciotti.” He clasped Midge's shoulder. “This is my wife, Midge...” He cupped the back of Donna's head. “And this is our daughter, Donna.” “Well, it's wonderful to finally meet you,” Mom said. Midge frowned. “I thought we met yesterday. That wasn't you?” “No — I mean, yes.” Mom shut her eyes and shook her head. “That was me, but it's nice to finally meet all of you. I'm Kitty.” She patted Red's arm. “This is Red, and...” She ushered Eric in front of her. “This is our son, Eric.” Eric's focus shifted to Donna. The sun had sunk low in the sky, and its rays imbued her with a heavenly glow. He was staring  — and it had to stop. He blinked twice, handed Bob the plate of brownies, and Midge gave Red the pie. That led to Eric's mom inviting the Pinciottis into the house. Bob and Midge accepted the offer, but Eric and Donna remained outside on the driveway. “So,” Donna said, “your parents seem nice.” “My mom is. My dad … well, he's a hardass.” “My dad's the opposite. Total softy.” Eric rocked on his heels. The conversation was going well. They were sharing with each other, but in his other life he'd had years to earn a kiss. In this one, he had only a week. “So your mom's the disciplinarian?” he said. He knew the answer, but this path of questioning could lead to a promising destination. She snorted. “Please. My parents wouldn't recognize discipline if it slapped them on the butt.” “You sound thrilled about that.” “Well, you know...” She brushed a stray lock of hair from her face. Eric hesitated before replying. Hyde could relate to her family situation better. They both had neglectful parents, whereas Eric's were a bit too present. But that had never stopped him from sympathizing with her, and it wouldn't stop him now. “They don't pay all that much attention to you, do they?” he said. She shrugged, and her gaze dropped to the pavement. She wasn't talking, but she hadn't left. He opened his mouth to change course, but she said, “They get into, like, really weird fads. Wrapped up in whatever's 'hip' for the month. Some of it's pretty disturbing.” “Believe me, Donna, I know from disturbing.” He laughed uncomfortably. “One time, I walked in my parents having sex. Their bedroom wasn't locked. I needed to get help for a friend of mine — my mom's a nurse. Anyway, I opened the door...” He swallowed as the memory resurfaced. “and there my parents were, naked and groaning each other's names—” Her gaze rose from the ground, and her eyes widened. “Oh, God, ew!” “I can still see them in my mind … hear them.” He wasn't lying. Discussing this horror had brought it back in full color. Sharing it with Donna so soon was a huge risk, but he needed to prove they had experiences in common. “It was just — it's awful.” “Okay, I'm gonna tell you something I've never told anybody else, all right?” She stepped closer to him. “When I was twelve, I saw my parents doing it...” Her story about finding her parents in her backyard, having sex on the hammock, was worse than his story. His responses were natural as she recounted it here, but most of his shock came from her openness. In his other life, he'd spent seventeen years with her. In this one, they'd had barely a few hours together, yet her instinct was to comfort him. She was wonderful … and he'd lost her. Not this time. He'd get that kiss. He'd return to his other life, and their relationship would be fixed, all by being himself. Because God loved him. “Oh, it won't be that easy,” the angel said in his mind, and Eric waved dismissively at his disembodied voice. Donna followed his hand movements, as if he were swatting at a fly. He clenched his fist and hid it in his pocket, and she continued her story. She described the checkerboard pattern left by the hammock on her parents' bodies, and when she finished, he said, “That must've completely freaked you out.” “No kidding! But the pain eventually receded, and I was able to live again.” “Speaking of living again...” He scratched the back of his head. “I heard Todd Rundgren's playing County Stadium in Milwaukee this Sunday.” “You like Todd Rundgren?” “Oh, yeah. WFPP's having a contest all week to win tickets. I'm gonna try to get a pair.” “Man, going to a Rundgren concert would be so cool.” She cracked her knuckles, something she often did while thinking. “You know what? I'm gonna try to win a pair, too.” “May the Force be with you.” “What?” He shut his eyes and cursed inwardly. Star Wars wouldn't come out for another seven months. He scavenged for a decent cover, but the patio door slid open behind him. His parents returned to the driveway with Bob and Midge. Red's face was slightly flushed, but he stayed quiet as Mom said, “Eric, the Pinciottis have agreed to join us for dinner this Saturday.” “Pumpkin, you're invited, too,” Bob said to Donna, and Eric's heart bounced against his ribs. Kiss-opportunities were increasing. He just had to take advantage of them. Midge grinned, and her teeth flashed in the patio light  “We'll see you on Saturday!” “Nice to meet you,” Donna said to Eric's parents and checked her watch. “God, Hyde must think I've fallen into a black hole.” She patted Eric's shoulder. “I'll see you tomorrow?” “Yeah. Hey, I could—” drive you to school, Eric intended to say, but she was already gone, stolen from him by her friendship with Hyde.

[justauthoring]

Welcome To The Loser’s

Anonymous Requested: Could i please have an imagine where the reader is Henry's little sister and she's always dragged around by him wherever he and his gang goes? The Losers Club see you one day getting yelled at and pushed around by Henry b/c you don't want to hang around him anymore and Richie is the first one to leap into action and come to your rescue.

Pairing: Loser’s Club x Reader + Richie x Reader

Warnings: abusive sibling?

“Y/N, do try to keep up. We don’t have time for your dawdling.”

You rolled your eyes, suppressing the urge to do anything more. It was truly becoming too much to handle, your brother and his friends constant nagging and sly remarks. And the fact that you had no choice whether or not to listen to them because Henry always thought it important to drag you along to every single place he went.

Henry didn’t give a shit about you if he was by himself, but anytime he went out with his douchebag of friends, he liked to bring you along. Purely for the purpose of being able to belittle you and intimidate you in front of his friends. Because apparently to your brother, that was “cool”.

You were only two years younger than him, and had never done anything to deserve such treatment. You always did what you could for your brother, mainly because he was your brother. And you just always thought that family stood up for each other and helped one another out. But apparently, not yours.

And your father liked to pretend the two of you didn’t exist unless he needed something from you, so they weren’t really an option.

So instead of hanging out with kids your own age, you were dragged place to place from your brother, teased and bullied by both him and his friends until the day was over.

“Jesus, Henry why do we even bring her along? She’s nothing but a nuisance.”

But today, it was becoming too much.

“You know why, Victor. She’s fun to tease.”

And you weren’t sure you were going to deal with this much longer.

“Haha, yeah. You’re right.”

Their stupid voices were almost too much to bear that you found yourself suddenly freezing in spot, your hands clenched beside you. Henry noticed you out of of the corner of his eye and turned to yell at you before you beat him to it; “stop speaking like i’m not here.” You spat, taking every ounce of confidence you had to speak aloud. “I’m going home, because I won’t stand here and be teased.”

Though the second you finished your words, you immediately regretted it. Henry was an idiot but he was your older brother, meaning he was much larger and taller then you. He could also become very scary if he wanted. So when you saw his face fall and his eyes narrow dangerously, you gulped thickly. “What did you say, Y/N?” Henry asked, as him and his friends stepped forward towards you.

“Yeah, i’m not sure we heard you.” Patrick added, lightly shoving you back with his hand.

Biting your lip, you narrowed your own eyes; “I said i’m going home, i-idiots.”

“Idiots?” Another shove, this one much harder you had to focus on not tripping over your own feet.

“You’re beginning to stutter, squirt.” Henry commented, smiling suddenly. “That makes you a whole lot less threatening.” Henry stepped forward, grabbing you by your shoulders before harshly pushing forward. You weren’t able to catch yourself this time and landed roughly on your bum. You skimmed across the gravel shortly, you groaning in pain. “Not that you were to begin with.”

You stared fearfully up at your brother and his friends, feeling your eyes water. This was not a smart mo-

“Hey, mullet!” Furrowing your brows, you looked past your brothers legs to see a small group of kids, that you recognized some from your class. Specifically the boy who’d spoken, Richie Tozier, who just happened to be in your english class. Nervously, you gazed up at your brother watching as his attention was pulled away from you, his friends as well.

“Why don’t you come over here and act like a man?”

“Oh-Oh, this should be good.” Your brother laughed, walking towards Richie who stood alone besides two other people. Hands grabbed arms, hauling you up and when you turned around you saw Bill Denbrough.

“BIll?” You questioned.

“C-Come on, Richie’s acting a-as a distraction.” The stuttering boy pulled you along, turning different corners until you were down in the forested area of Derry. Panting, you slowed to a stop as you found yourself surrounded by a few more kids. “This is S-Stan, Beverly a-and Ben.” 

“Hi.” You waved nervously.

“Woah, nearly got caught.” You turned at the sound of a new voice, finding Richie from before followed by the two other kids. Laughing, he stopped beside you, letting a hand fall on your shoulder. “Your brother’s a real dick, Y/N.”

“Y-Yeah...” You shrugged, rubbing the back of your neck. “I know.”

“Well, anyways. I’m Richie, this is Eddie and Mike.” You waved hello to them again, smiling at your new found friends. “Nice to meet you all.”

“Welcome to the Loser’s, Y/N.”

[tidalwave-shiningsky]

What is the epicest real estate fuckup you're legally allowed to tell us about?

So I didn’t witness this personally but we learn it in school because there are a lot of important lessons to be had from it (don’t worry, it’s also hilarious)

So this was Tasse, a reasonably small city with seven families controlling more than 95% of it, which is important, because you couldn’t pull this off in a big splintered city.

And it was a long time ago, before we knew better, so if you’re reading and thinking “don’t we know better”, yes, we do now, but we do now because things like this happened.

anyway Tasse had a problem with labor

in particular, Tasse is small because it’s in a valley, with the land around it really expensive to develop, and so land prices were rising, and housing costs were rising, and it was getting impossible to hire staff for anything resembling a reasonable amount of money because poor purples could not afford to live there

and these people got together and were like “poor purples can’t afford to live in our city! this is horrible! let’s make sure there’s always enough cheap housing!” and designated every single family responsible for building at least 1000 units of housing which would never rise in rent above an amount that was about half of the market rate

so up go 7000 units of cheap purple housing, and purples, not being idiots, are like “sweet, I will sub-lease this for twice as much as I’m paying for it”, which is ooci unless you’re fairly wealthy, so all the units have now been scooped up by rich purples

city council gets back together and bans subleasing and bans living in the cheap housing unless your annual income is below a fairly low bar and evicts everyone and tries again

now, obviously they are flooded with applications for these units, and they have to figure out a system to manage this. some places have three-year waitlists and some start prioritizing people who work for them and some of the property managers just straight-up take bribes for a spot and some of them come up with really elaborate rules about who’s allowed to live there - no one who has been unemployed for longer than a month since they were four, no one who can’t pay the entire year’s rent up front, no one who can’t put together a personalized presentation about their merits as a tenant (there are videos that were submitted for this, they’re kind of horrifying to witness, all these brightly smiling purples with their customer service face on talking about how worthy of an apartment they are)

I mentioned some places were prioritizing people who work for them. Well, this actually worked really well - you could get people at a much better salary if they were also guaranteed cheap housing with employment. So several large local employers go to the property owners and ask if they can offer this same perk in exchange for paying the property owners

(guess)

about the difference between the subsidized apartment’s rates and market rate housing

they get a lot of takers, they sign up a lot of purples whose salaries are lowered by

(guess)

about the difference between the subsidized apartment’s rates and market rate housing

the city council calls it good, because there are now many purples living in this city and not paying that much for housing, and that was the goal, right?

Except!!!!!! One of the industries that was participating in this ridiculous minor shenanigan was a company that franchises little corner stores that sell, among other things, addictive drugs, and at that time, Anitam had (this is also now known to be an inferior way to do things, but we didn’t know at the time) a tax on income earned by selling addictive drugs, so paying your employees in housing instead of in money technically qualifies as tax evasion and the whole thing comes to the attention of the national government

Which notices that the subsidized housing is in violation of several building code laws, has long-term structural problems, uses unsafe materials, and is wildly unpopular among its tenants, who can’t move because they can’t afford market-rate housing on their salaries which were artificially lowered because their employers were paying for housing.

Why the building code problems? Well, usually when you commission a building, it’s a priority for it to help your brand, last for the long term, and produce apartments that people want to live in. If you’re building a building just to comply with a law, you’re just going to go with the cheapest contractor, and the cheapest contractor is cheapest because they cut corners.

So everyone gets evicted for the second time in a year, three buildings get condemned and expensive repairs are required on four more, and the owners dawdle on the expensive repairs because the buildings are such a money-loser anyway. Eight different companies sue the landowners and the city council over the loss of the subsidized housing they were paying their employers with. the landowners sue each other over not having built their fair share of the agreed-upon housing, which would have solved the city’s affordability problem. Three divorces result. Some enterprising purples sneak into the buildings with the help of sympathetic building security, do the necessary safety repairs, and then just squat there. This is the part of the story you’ve probably heard: they famously reprogrammed one elevator to take you to the 4th, 10th, 23rd, 59th or 75th floor whichever floor you asked to go to, so security sweeps of the building didn’t realize that eighty floors of it were actually fully occupied.

This actually did lower the price of housing, as did several angry business owners moving their companies out of town, and Tasse’s landowners settled their suits and mostly never spoke of the whole thing again. Legend goes that they never found out about the squatters but the version I find plausible is that they ended up being bribed to ignore them, with bribes that amounted to

(guess)

about the amount of money they were foregoing by not evicting them, renovating the place, and leasing the units again.

Markets are stubborn.