#lucifer? oh you mean the guy who just wanted to unionize?

[weepylucifer]

hi! im trying to get into luciferanism and ive always admired how you worship. I was just wondering how you got into it/what are the best places to start? thank you!!

i had to let that one marinate bc, whew, you must have been here a long time. it's been about 5 years since i talked about luciferianism at any length

i can forward you a post with links for sources on it but be aware that i personally haven't vetted these and, from my experience with the different types of people that find themselves drawn to any flavor of satanism, you could find a WIDE array of dodgy shit here. enjoy with care: (x)

i can say i got into it purely by accident: i was a teen and i saw a german youtuber i admired at the time talk a bit about being a satanist, and so i just started saying i was one too. i can pretty confidently claim that's honestly all anyone does, plus extra frills of choice attached.

no, hear me out here: the thing that still fascinates me about luciferianism and really any kind of satanism is that it's an entirely artificial religion. now, you could say "that's all religions. they're all made up by humans lol" and i'd dock you points in the game of life for being a reddit atheist. you could say all religion is really a long tradition of passing on a narrative and set of guidelines to help us live good lives and understand our starry universe, and i'd be lenient with you for wording it more sensitively. but that's not what i MEAN. what i mean is: most religions are built up, more or less by consensus, organically over the centuries. and most religions that you'd think of raise some claim towards the truth: that their god is real, that their prophets are real, that their holy scripture came about as a result of some manner of inspiration from a superior entity. satanism in no form claims that. the satanic bible was written by some guy, and no one is saying that satan spoke to him. i don't think anton szandor lavey believed satan exists. the overwhelming majority of satanists don't believe satan exists. the entire point is to take the cultural narrative that exists in a (christian-centric) culture about satan and craft something out of it that carries spiritual meaning to you. that's why satanism is not so much a religious group as it is myriads of worshippers doing their own thing.

(this does however carry the danger of just producing individualism with a goth veneer, and lavey himself was inspired by ayn rand. be very wary! ☝️)

i've seen luciferianism loosely defined as this: you take in the story of lucifer, and you try to make it applicable to your life. for me, this has kind of organically led to becoming a communist. this is my one legit offering to you: not higher wisdom, but the words of mortal man (karl marx). ...nahh just kidding go wherever you want with it. that said, reading paradise lost can't hurt!! while that's probably not what milton wanted you to get from it, it really does show you a great sympathetic devil!

[astaroth1357]

A Demon Has Claimed My Soul! (Among Other Things…)

Your Guide to Possessive Demons!

So you've made a pact with a demonic hellspawn, the powers of which are beyond your comprehension, and now you want to become an item? Fantastic! Love can still be found even in the most unholy of unions! However, there are some very important things that any human should know before giving themselves away to the forces of Hell and that is what we here at Mammoney, Inc. plan to provide! In our award-winning guide, A Demon Has Claimed My Soul! (Among Other Things…), you will receive a comprehensive overview of the possessive behaviors of your new lover as well as the Dos and Don'ts for keeping your relationship on track! Remember, your satisfaction is a definite possibility! 

(Mammoney, Inc. accepts no responsibility for injuries caused due to taking our advice. No refunds accepted, terms and conditions apply).

Lucifer

Lucifer, huh? Are you sure you really want to go through with that, human? He’s really no fun at parties, hell no fun in general! But if you’re into being told what to do all the time then he’s probably a dream come true so whatever floats your boat...

If you decide to start a relationship with Lucifer, the first thing to know is he plans to have you and keep you. Once you've gone down this road there’s no going back now, human.

Lucifer will show his possessiveness most often through stating it outright. He will be pretty blunt about claiming who you now belong to and isn't shy to tell that to others too. Get used to the reminders.

He’ll do those old school kind of moves like letting you wear his coat over your shoulders or keeping a hand on your waist. He doesn’t have to do all that much more because no one would be dumb enough to try anything after he’s staked his claim.

DO: Pretty much anything he says

DON’T: Defy him, ignore his requests, or piss off Diavolo.

Leviathan 

Levi? Really? You know he hasn’t left his room in centuries right? And you’d be playing second fiddle to an actual anime character? In our astute opinion, human, this ain’t a good choice.

Levi is the Avatar of Envy so he’s going to be pretty possessive at all times. If you’re going to choose with him then just know that he won’t be letting you go any time soon… Literally. He will cling to you like his life depends on it.

Levi’s primarily going to show his possessiveness of you through being hostile to others like a pissed off snake. 

Any time that you’re not alone together he’ll be on edge or glaring at everyone around you. If someone gets too chummy he might start hissing until they back off. He won’t actually do anything unless someone tries to make a move, but if they do get out of the way in case he summons Lotan.

DO: Stay close to him (especially in public), let him hold your hand or stay on his arm, keep conversations with other people short, and always tell him if you’re going out to meet someone.

DON’T: Basically wander off anywhere without telling him first, flirt with anybody else while he’s watching, scratch that, just don’t be overly nice to anybody while he’s watching. Not even the Chihuahua. 

Satan

Okay so yeah Satan is smart, but all those smiles are hella phony! He really ain’t as nice as he looks and… What we mean to say is, Satan will act nice to lure you in but you better watch out, human.

Satan can act pretty chill when he wants to so he might not come off as all that possessive for a while. But the second he sees someone acting a little too close with you he’ll snap and start shouting at them. Doesn’t matter who it is or why, he won’t be able to stop himself.

When he does show his possessiveness he is shameless, almost as bad as Asmo, because then he’s trying to make a point to someone or other. PDA for days, but he’ll be glancing at whoever he’s trying to piss off like an asshole…

Satan's the guy who'd leave a lot of marks on you like bruises and hickies to speak for him when he ain't around.

DO: Get used to PDA, invest in sweaters, borrow Asmo's concealer.

DON’T: Do anything that pisses him off. (For more on this, consider purchasing our other guide: How To Calm My Demon Boyfriend)

Asmodeus 

Oh come on, Asmo??? Human, be real for a moment! He’s never gonna be faithful to you at all, I mean we’re all demons so it’s not like we really care all that much but humans care doncha?? You could pick better is all I’m-er We’re saying!

Asmo is going to cling to you about as much as Levi but that’s because he wants attention, not because he’s jealous or anything. He really won’t get possessive of you until someone tries to tell him he can’t be around you for whatever reason. Then he’ll whine, complain, and make a scene until he gets his way.

Asmo will show he owns you by trying to make you into practically the same person. Not in personality, just in appearance.

He’ll start by buying a lot of matching or very… Asmo-looking clothes and jewelry for you to wear. He’ll look for any excuse to put you in his outfits or make sure you use the same perfumes so you smell like each other all the time. Demons have sensitive noses so that’s as good as marking you for his.

DO: Wear the clothes and don’t complain, tell him what sort of style you’d prefer so he can pick more of what you want, try not to get annoyed by his diva act

DONT: Wear somethin' else without telling him, have sex with anyone else without permission first (who knows, ya may get it with him), ignore him. Ever.

Beelzebub 

…. Just a friendly reminder that he could eat you.

Beel isn’t going to come off as possessive of ya until he starts getting lonely. He’s pretty busy with practices and taking care of his appetite, but if he starts feelin’ like you haven’t been paying enough attention to him, he’s gonna get needy and want ya around more. 

He can be pretty childish about it, really. If someone comes over and asks if you want to go do something he’ll just pick ya up and tell them no. He’ll put ya down if you make a fuss about it but he’ll get grouchy so you’ll have to make it up to’em later.

If he’s feeling lonely, he’ll invite you out for food a lot more and try to keep you away from his brothers. He won’t even like you talking to Belphie. It’ll pass after a couple days, so just sit tight and things will go back to normal soon enough.

DO: Feed him. Constantly.

DON'T: Stop feeding him. Ever. Or look too delicious.

Belphegor 

Okay we all know what makes him a bad choice, so let’s not even go there! Honestly human, have some survival instinct, will ya??

Belphie will take the clingy route of always wanting to be around ya, but if he wants to go nap or somethin’ he'll just take ya with him. Doesn't matter whatcha doin'. If he wants ya there, he'll drag ya along too.

Belphie’s gonna be passive-aggressive about his possessiveness when others are involved, a lot of stare downs and lookin’ annoyed. He won’t tell’em to piss off like Beel would but there’d a general aura of “Go the Hell Away” around him so it’s gonna be around you too.�� 

If you two aren’t sharing a nap together then expect him to lean on ya a lot, probably with his head on your shoulder. Don’t stand still for too long ‘cause he will fall asleep like that and then you're stuck draggin’ his dead weight.

DO: Get used to being a pillow and not going anywhere for long periods of time.

DON’T: Keep him up too long, wake him up early, or toss and turn in bed.

Mammon

Obviously, the Great and Powerful Mammon is really the best choice, human. It's clear ya got a good head on your shoulders and that’s a good sign. But for the sake of being helpful, we will still give ya advice, for your sake and mi-… his.

The Great Mammon knows how lost and pathetic you’d be if he wasn’t around so he’ll take it on himself to be sure you’ve always got someone to help ya. Don’t go thinkin’ that he’s just lonely and lookin’ for a little comfort, ‘cause that Ain’t! It! And don’t go letting any of his brothers try pullin’ the same crap because he’s the only one who’s allowed to do that, ya hear??

The Great Mammon doesn’t need to act possessive because everyone will already know you’re his!... Okay, sometimes they need a refresher but there ain’t nothing wrong with that!

You'll never have to worry about his brothers botherin' you because he’ll always be there to scare'em off. He’s your first man so he better get priority and doncha go forgettin’ it! It's gotta be you and him against the world, got it?

DO: Show the Great Mammon appreciation for his time, "appreciation" can be cash, gimme cash.

DONT: Forget about the Great Mammon, ignore the Great Mammon, refuse to gimme cash.

[sergeant-angels-trashcan]

okay here me out but high school!spn would be hilarious because, y'know, there's the 3 winchester (yes adam is there) and horrible dad john winchester. obivously, mary is dead which is why john in horrible.

BUT, other than the winchesters, there's also the angels, which everyone is also deadass confused about because they're's like 30 of them?? and apparently they're all related, all adopted by birth except the 4 eldest. and the very oldest, michael, raises them, which nobody knows if it's legal or not, but everybody's too afraid to say something.

And, of course, they're's the demons, who are like a bunch of kids who live at an orphanage and hate the angels.

okay that was long and really just me rambling

what i heard was “the angels are like the cullens” and michael is like. very fuck you to any high schooler who brings it up.

also, Michael either looks JUST like that Adam kid OR he looks like apocalypse!michael because that guy was cute and i liked him

OK BUT. HEAR ME OUT.

Mary is NOT dead, but she and John are divorced because John had an affair with Kate Milligan (Adam’s mom) and neither woman knew about the other until Adam’s like. Five or something?

At first Mary and Kate HATE each other, look at that Scheming Conniving Whore who is the Reason I Can’t Have My Man, but then they realize it’s JOHN’S FAULT, and they should unite against the Common Enemy. John has no idea. So the divorce goes through and he’s like, hey Kate can I come stay with you and Adam :) and Kate’s all, actually, you can get fucked, I’m taking my friend out for a celebratory drink, her divorce got finalized.

They’re each a margarita into the night when Mary goes “this is like a date! hah ha just kidding! unless...?”

IT’S NOT A JOKE THEY DATE AND GET MARRIED/CIVIL UNIONED/PARTNERED/SUE THE STATE OF KANSAS and John is just sitting over there, a jackass.

Kate’s a nurse, so she can pretty much support the family because Mary wants to go back to school! And get advanced degrees in like. Mythology or folklore. Idk if Mary went to college in canon? Anyway she’s a farm girl, (for some reason in my head “a family of monster hunters” translates to normal universe as “family farm” idk idk) so maybe she gets some fancy agriculture degrees or becomes a conservationist (Sam being a National Parks nerd??? yes please. he’d sit and help Mary study and he’s been known to hijack tours from Park Rangers but he’s so earnest it’s hard to be mad at him)

they have a crazy amazing garden (adhd!dean helping his mom in the garden??? yes). Mary teaching self-defense classes! Kate teaching the boys advanced first aid! And regretting it! No, Dean, just because you CAN sew up your brother’s wound doesn’t mean you should! 

Dean trying to teach Adam and Sam to shave because “i’m the man of the family” and Kate saying “oh sweetie, I’m the man of the family. you get to be a kid of the family, ok?” because let Dean be a child, please, and also, now none of these children understand gender and it’s WONDERFUL. (Adam is the only full time he/him in the house and as much as Dean protects his little brothers, Adam has been known to punch a transphobe or two.

Adam: it’s called DIRECT ACTION, Principal Amara!)

I want to say there’s still a house fire when Sammy’s a baby, but obvs Mary doesn’t die, she just has severe burns? (makes John cheating even MORE of a douche thing but idk) anyway this plus Kate being a nurse, I could see Adam being into physical therapy or counseling or something when he gets older?

also random thought but Mary and Kate host the BEST halloween parties. they go all out. Their best costume so far is Harley/Ivy.

I KEEP FORGETTING WHERE I’M GOING WITH THIS

This means Mary’s the one who knows Bobby (and his husband Rufus) via hunting and Gay Advocacy and their extensive collection of rare texts that are tangentially related to Mary’s work somehow

Mary and Kate become big advocates for legalization of sex work.

the Angel Kids family are from a SUPER religious upbringing. obviously. probably. more like a cult honestly. Cas and Anna straight-up ran away when they were 13 ish. They MIGHT have convinced their dad to sign some papers when he was drunk which is how they were able to get emancipated. Sort of?

They track down their older brother Gabe, who left the family as soon as he was old enough to strike out on his own, but once Anna and Cas leave, all their other siblings sort of come trailing after them (Balthazar first) to find them and take care of them, so Gabe all of the sudden goes from livin the single life to co-parenting twenty siblings with his OTHER siblings, who he can’t STAND and he somehow became the Rules Parent because Luci isn’t going to enforce shit! That asshole! When Uriel finally gets out Gabe is like thank fuck I’m leaving now. When Michael finally gets to them, Gabe is in Shock. “Holy fuck, what did dad DO that was bad enough to make YOU leave?? dude???”

(I want Gabe and the Archangel Brigade to be in their late 20s/early 30s when Cas and Co. are in high school because Gabe absolutely works in porn. Michael gets all self-righteous with him and Gabe glares. “First of all. This is my house, so, you know, fuck off. Second of all, are you going to support this family? No? Yes? With what? the last job you had was CO-LEADING A CULT.” Uriel is working as an electrician while taking meteorology courses.)

who is in charge of the Demon Kids? Rowena or Lilith, maybe? or CAIN. CAIN!!!

The Harvelles absolutely make an appearance. I’m tempted to say that Mary and Kate look at Ellen and go “her. we want her” and it’s a band of badass women and their badass children.

it’s VERY important to me that Dean is a theatre nerd. VERY IMPORTANT. He and Sam might play basketball just because of their height, but I don’t know that they enjoy it that much. Sam’s more of a lacrosse or soccer guy. Adam’s into hockey (little rage monsters that they are) 

idk it depends on ships that you want? Because high school age Crowley being Dean’s Bad Boy Boyfriend is pretty primo comedy, imo, and you would work in the Leviathans as a rival high school or even as new kids? And of course Michael/Adam Sam/Lucifer don’t work in a hs au with the archangels aged up the way I have? You could have the Older Sibling Angels Be Gabe, Balthazar, and Naomi, with Naomi being the one leaves last, who was helping Chuck with his cult (which leaves more room for Michael to be a himbo)

for the record I’m not OPPOSED to a John is a Good Dad AU. I just like AUs where I can Unfridge All the Women

WOW i had a lot of feelings about this. oops. 

[sparklingichigo]

Drama Intensifies

Part 13

Now here we are in the final scene. Reika and the Shadow King finally joined forces turning a big dragon and they flew up, against the Devildom's ground. Sure this is shocking, suddenly they hear a loud thump. A certain angel has been summoned.

Sandalphon : So... what did I miss?

Michael: That- [points into that big dragon]

Sandalphon: Ah, like the old times. It's been a while, shadow king.

Shadow King: ???? What? Who are you?!

Sandalphon: One of the Cherubim angels. So, are we gonna fight or what?

Reika: You're on!

Sandalphon: Before that- [creates a wall between himself and the others]

Michael: Are you sure you don't need help?

Sandalphon: Certainly not, Michael. The other Cherubim angels are on their way as well. So if there's more earthquake don't mind us^^

Michael: Okay! We'll count on you, Sandalphon!!

Sandalphon: I'll do my best!

And so the battle begins. The others have zero idea what's going on because of Sandalphon's wall hindering them from seeing everything despite flying. But one thing, this angel is definitely winning.

Haruka: ...What now?

Simeon: Unsure, let's just let him do his thing.

Solomon: Can I just-

Asmo: No! That's dangerous! Are you crazy?!

Tidus : Let's just...introduce ourselves. I'm Tidus and this is my wife, Yuna.

Yuna: Hello, everyone! It's very nice to meet you^^

Warrior of Light: As you know, my name is warrior of light^^ it's very nice to meet you kids.

Luke: I'm not a kid???

Zidane: Oh, how old are you?

Luke: .... 10? In human age... but 885 in angel age....

Zidane : pfft, you're actually a kid. I'm 16.

Luke: Stop calling me that!

Noctis: Ehem! Everyone, my name is Noctis. Heir to the Lucian Throne.

Diavolo: Oh a royal as well! I'm Diavolo, soon to be king of Devildom!

Solomon: Heh, already a king right here! King of Israel!

Ichigo: Ex. Ex-King of Israel.

Solomon: I'm still a king!

Ichigo: And I don't give a sht!

Tina: Uhm... Hi everyone, I'm Tina^^

Asmo: She's so pretty! Hi, Tina! I'm Asmo! We're gonna be good friends!

Tina: W-we are?

Asmo: If you want to ^^

And so on, basically, they're all bonding on Ichigo's dragon. Luckily Violet is fine with them being on top of her. Of course, the other oldies are with Merlin, on his dragon Kilgharrah. As they were talking, another earthquake happens.

Haruka: I'm gonna see what happened.

Lucifer: Haruka no! That's really dangerous!

Haruka: I'll be fine. Fenrir is with me and he'll protect me!

Lucifer: Fine, Satan, go with her.

Satan and Simeon: What?!

Satan: Why are you shocked as well?!

Simeon: You tell me!

Lucifer: ...Unfortunately, I only trust Satan at this point. Because my other brothers... are reckless.

Beel: I'm not re-

Lucifer: and in this case, a certain someone wouldn't let you-

Ichigo: Me? I'm fine with it. If you want Beel to go with her.

Lucifer: My decision is final.

Haruka: ...Fine.... Guess Satan will get on Fenrir with me.

Haha, of course, Simeon doesn't like any of this. Ichigo and the twins are cracking up because it's too funny. So are Mammon and Levi. So here they are, Haruka and Satan on Fenrir looking at the battle.

Satan: Wow, he did summon another one.

Haruka: Indeed... and it's quite an intense battle.

Fenrir: It is, Princess. I think we should come back soon.

Haruka: Why so?

Fenrir: THAT THING IS ABOUT TO ATTACK US!!

Satan: Sht! Get down, Fenrir! Now!!

Luckily Fenrir flies down all the way back to them. Sandalphon is shocked by the sudden shot. Did someone come there? Perhaps one of their strategies. Oh well. Back at the safe space, Haruka and Satan are both scared shtless. They almost died because of that shot!

Lucifer: What happened?!

Satan: That thing saw us... and shoot us...

Lucifer: I told you going there was a bad idea!

Haruka: I know...I know.... I think she notices my appearance and wants to fight me.

Solomon: Why would she fight you? Isn't her target Ichigo and I?

Haruka: Well....yeah... it's a long story actually. So technically Reika and I are sisters, she's my evil twin considering her acts.

Solomon: So?

Ichigo: Uhm... there are also twins who are getting along just well.

Haruka: Not the point. But I'll just battle this. Since she already hurt you guys and I can't have it!

Ichigo: Then I'll go too! Her target is me, not you! We'll do it!

Solomon: I'm surrounded by crazy chicks!

Ichigo: Yes you are^^ Now our final form?

Haruka: Final form^^

With that Ichigo and Haruka transform into their final form. Ichigo ends up in a pink-black outfit while Haruka turns into a white mage with a crystal wand.

Luke: Whoa! That's so cool!

Lucifer: Are you sure you don't want any help from us?

Ichigo: Certainly not. Sure I might summon you guys for battle but for now, I don't think so. You guys did well.

Beel: Don't die!

Ichigo: I won't or at least I'll try to.

Warrior of Light: For now, we'll give you backup powers. All of us!

With that Haruka's knights connect all their powers and give her more into that crystal wand. Of course, Merlin supports her granddaughter by giving her his powers.

Merlin: Here is mine, Please use them well.

Ichigo: Thanks a lot Grandpa, I won't let you down!

Haruka: Fenrir! Take us there!

Fenrir: Yes, your highness.

Fenrir finally took Ichigo and Haruka to the battle field. Of course Sandalphon and his cherubim angels are still battling the Azazel dragon a.k.a Reika and Shadow King's union. Once they arrive, Reika suddenly comes out with a psycho grin.

Reika: Oh, you're here. Finally, the battle I've been looking for, especially with you.

Ichigo: ...can you like specify....? Because there's like three of us. Are you battling the wolf? Me? Haruka? Who?

Fenrir: I'll go help Sandalphon, I don't think her target is me.

Haruka: Alright^^ Good luck, Fenrir!

As soon as Fenrir runs towards the Sandalphon's area. Reika obviously charges towards Ichigo first considering she's her target. Luckily Ichigo summons her flame sword to parry that sword. Of course, Reika being Reika forces the sword into her further.

Ichigo: Heh, you're so motivated to kill me, are you?

Reika: Yes. Because you deserve death.

Ichigo: Go on then, kill me. [parries the sword and luckily removes that sword]. I'm done. I'm done with all your bullsht, Reika. You go "oh I'm gonna kill Ichigo" but here we are. I'm not dead yet!

Reika: Oh, I will certainly kill you.

Ichigo: Do it. I don't have my sword now. Come on, coward

Reika getting riled up summons her sickle to finally kill her once and for all. She's about to throw it at Ichigo. Ichigo anticipates her death right now until someone blocks the attack.

Merlin: STAY AWAY FROM MY GRANDDAUGHTER!!

Reika: See! This is why I haven't killed you yet! Let go, you old man!

Ichigo: Grandpa... why can't you just let her kill me....?

Merlin: Because you're my granddaughter that's why. Now allow me^^ [throws the sickle far far away]

Ichigo: Grandpa... [sigh]

Meanwhile, in the safe space, everyone hears a loud thump. There are so many explosions they don't even know who's winning!

Beel: Lucifer, you have to let me get in there! Please!!

Lucifer: I can't let you do that! That's really dangerous!

Beel: But-

Satan: Dad, you gotta let me in. She might be dead anytime soon!

Diavolo: ....uhm....have you guys seen Merlin?

Barbatos: pfft-

Diavolo: What?

Barbatos: Rest assure everyone, we have hope^^

Diavolo: You're telling me...Merlin joins them?

Barbatos: He is, as a good grandpa that he is^^

Back at the battlefield, Merlin and Ichigo both joined forces to battle Reika. Haruka luckily has finally defeat Reika's clone. Of course, Reika summons her sickle again to battle them.

Merlin: [sigh] Time to summon my most powerful weapon.

Ichigo: What do you mean?

Merlin: The one and only... [Pulls out his magical sword] This, we'll use this to battle her.

Reika: Ha! Guess she did lose after all. Such a weakling.

Ichigo: Do you like...wanna check your cloning?

Reika: What do you mean?!

Ichigo: That thing is destroyed and so will you! Grandpa, use the sword!

Reika: Not so fast!

Just like that Reika ends up battling Merlin, she did use the illusion magic but Merlin knows well where she was. He's just giving her a chance until Merlin smirks and freezes her in place.

Reika: What?! How?! How is it possible?! How?!

Merlin: Because this sword will kill sinners and sinners only, and you're one of them. [slashes her]

With that Reika has finally disappeared with a scream and a big explosion, unfortunately, Sandalphon is still battling with Shadow King. Hearing the explosion, Shadow King checks what happened and he finds Reika exploding.

Shadow King: No!! Reika! HOW DARE YOU, LOWLY SORCERER!!

Merlin: Low? Really? Me? Low? I literally just killed your partner.

Shadow King: You will pay for this!

Sandalphon: [sigh] Everyone, please take cover. This world is gonna explode.

Ichigo: What?!

Fenrir: Come on, let's go! Both of you!

Ichigo and Merlin get on top of Fenrir but they can't seem to find Haruka.

Ichigo: Fenrir! Where's Haruka?!

Fenrir: Simeon caught her, let's go.

Once they return, Simeon is still healing Haruka with Michael's help. Fenrir also tells them the news that the world is gonna explode.

Lucifer: The world is gonna what?!

Simeon: Come again?!

Fenrir: That thing is so mad, he's gonna blow up the world and that wall is not going to hold it back.

Solomon: Human world! We'll go to the human world!

Lucifer: Hurry! Solomon! Open the portal!

Solomon: Might as- SHT! THAT THING IS SHOOTING AT US!

Lucifer: Hurry up!!

Ichigo: [sigh] Let me!

Both Solomon and Ichigo create a big portal to help them.

Ichigo: EVERYONE GET INTO THE PORTAL NOW!!

Noctis: What about us?!

Ichigo: YOU TOO! COME ON, GO!!

So with that, everyone hurriedly enters the portal, entering the human world. Luckily everyone is saved and none are injured. The angels have returned to heaven. Now this leaves the humans and demons. Unfortunately, Devildom is now gone, leaving it in a pool of lava.

Diavolo: I can't believe we went on battle just because of a petty reason....

Lucifer: Indeed... I'm sorry about Devildom.

Diavolo: It's okay.... at least we're now in the human realm. I'm sure Devildom will renincarnate.

Lucifer: I'm sure of that too.

Ichigo: Now what?

Beel: Human world food!!

Ichigo: Sure, I'm kinda hungry as well.

Belphie: Heh, never thought of the day of seeing Ichigo wearing short shorts.

Ichigo: It's 32 degrees Celcius! It's hot!

Asmo: You know what else is hot?

Ichigo: Hm?

Asmo: THAT MAN! [points at Solomon in his summer outfit]

Ichigo: ....ew

Haruka: ew indeed.

Solomon: What?!

Haruka: I prefer to stare at this anyway-

Simeon: Hm? Me?

Haruka: Yeah...^^

Belphie: Perhaps my twin brother?

Ichigo glances at Beel in his human world outfit. Alright, this is time for Ichigo to die....slowly...

Ichigo: ....uh....

Warrior of Light: Everyone! I'm sorry for interrupting your talk, but we have to return to our home soon^^

Lucifer: Our apologies. We do get distracted a lot.

Luke: So soon???

Noctis: Yeah! This kid is cool!

Luke: I'm not a kid!!

Noctis: can't you just focus on the nice stuff?!

Lightning: Unfortunately, Noctis, we need to go^^

Noctis: But we're in the human world though-

Warrior of light: We're in the wrong universe though. We should come back soon.

Noctis: Psh. You're no fun! Fine!

Warrior of Light: Well, it's good knowing you all^^ Farewell, Michael, Lucifer.

Michael: Farewell^^

Lucifer: Have a safe journey.

At the same time, Diavolo, Ichigo, and Merlin have to part as well. Sure he can stay with them but that'd mean exposing his identity.

Ichigo: Do you really have to go?

Merlin: I mean... I can stay but that'd mean exposing my identity to the whole world. So I have to go on a nomad. I'll visit though.

Ichigo: I see...

Diavolo: Do inform if you're visiting. I'm sure to make the best welcome party for you!

Barbatos: M'lord-

Merlin: I'm sure to inform you guys! But off I go now! See you all soon!

With that Merlin and the knights from Haruka's world left them with their own portal.

Tina: I'm gonna miss you all!! Especially you, bestie!!

Asmo: Samme!! Please visit though!! I'll do your hair! and your nails and-

Solomon: Shut up.

Asmo: and your makeup!!

Tina: Me too!! We can switch outfits too!!

Warrior of Light: Tina!

Tina: Y-Yes sir, my apologies!

Warrior of Light: Come on, we're late.

Once the portal closes, this leaves the devil dom citizen and the angels.

Diavolo: You know...Warrior of light reminds me of both of you.

Lucifer: Both of- nooo! Michael and I are totally different!

Michael: Yep! 100% difference.

Solomon: Are you sure?

Lucifer and Michael: SHUT UP!!

Diavolo: indeed, twins. Right, Rosaria?

Rosaria: Indeed. Twins.

Satan: ....does that mean Michael and Rosaria are my uncle and auntie?

Lucifer: ....

Michael: .....

Rosaria: ....

Solomon: Great, you broke all three of them!

Lucifer: I don't think I can sleep tonight...

Michael: Same...

Rosaria: What?!

Michael: Hahaha, just ignore him. He's probably unfocused today. Wanna go shopping?

Rosaria: Human world shopping?! Yes!

Now back to our couple. Of course, Ichigo is dying inside because Beel is teasing her right now while Simeon and Haruka are relaxing beneath the tree.

Belphie: I'll just go... yeah... [leave the area] wait I can't even sleep. It's too hoooot!!

Haruka: Hey Belphie, you can sleep beside me!

Belphie: Aaa thank you!! It's too hot and here we are! [sleeps beside Haruka]

Simeon: Well.... we need to find a place soon because we can't possibly sleep on this grass.

Ichigo: Well that's true, we need to get a place soon.

Belphie: Yea, sleeping on grass is uncomfortable!

Lucifer: I actually....have a place here^^

Simeon: You do?

Lucifer: I do! A mansion actually to fit all six of my brothers and some guests... sometimes Lord Diavolo.

Satan: I didn't know you were rich...

Lucifer: Why do you think Mammon always tries to get my wallet?

Satan: touche.

Lucifer: Luckily, it's not that far from here so we can get there soon.

Michael: Oh that's good! Because... I got banned from the celestial realm by Father for 3 months... Because of engaging some sins...

Simeon: Same.... unironically it's only the three of us.

Luke: ....That's really biased....

Haruka: ....Lucifer.... can I stay in a hotel instead?

Lucifer: ??? Why?

Haruka: Because I wanna stay with Simeon...?

Lucifer: With Simeon?

Haruka: Yes.

Lucifer: Well you guys are fiance, it's only fair.

Lucifer: Wait- Fiances?! Since when are you guys engaged?!

Simeon: ....months ago....?

Michael: Probably more.

Lucifer: Oh, I didn't no- Satan... are you okay?

Satan: ....y-yeah I'm fine. Haha.....

Ichigo: Here. [gives him tissue]

Satan: no, no, no I'm fine.

Ichigo: Bruh-

Beel: There there [pats Satan's shoulder]

And everyone, that's how Devildom got destroyed.... well reincarnated. So here they are in Lucifer's mansion while the angels and Haruka stay at the hotel.

Ichigo:....why are you staying at the hotel? And with him???

Haruka: Because....

Asmo: oh ho ho ho ho~ What are you gonna do there~

Simeon: Asmodeus!

Asmo: Who knows, perhaps Simeon is more sinful~

Michael: Asmodeus Morningstar!

Asmo: Alright, alright, okay!

Simeon: Get your head out of the gutter, Asmo.

Asmo: I'm the avatar of lust, it's impossible~

Asmo: But certainly someone is free to do sins in the mansion~ I can smell how turned you are because of Beel's outfit.

Beel: Asmo!

Ichigo: What- no!

Belphie: I mean... if you want to-

Ichigo: Belphegor!

Solomon: Watch everyone in the mansion hears screams from their room.

Lucifer: [smacks Solomon] Keep your dirty thoughts to yourself!

Michael: Lucifer, Rosaria and I are going to the hotel, okay?

Lucifer: Sure! See you around, twin brother!

Michael: ...Lucifer acknowledges me!

Lucifer: Shut up!

Rosaria: There there^^ We'll be off now.

Lucifer: Have a safe trip^^ You too, Simeon, Luke.

Simeon: Thank you, Lucifer. I wish the same for you. Come on, Haruka.

Haruka: Bye everyone!!!

Luke: Byeee!! We'll visit!!

Ichigo: :(( I'll miss you, Luke!!

Luke: I'll visit!! It won't be far!

Ichigo: [sighs in relief] Oh that's good. I can visit you!

Luke: You can!

Simeon: Luke... come on^^

Luke: o-o oh no [catches up to them]

Now this leaves Ichigo, Barbatos, Diavolo, and the seven brothers. They're now on their way to the human world mansion. Satan unfortunately is still sad because of what he sees. Belphie and Asmo comfort him of course but Satan prefers to be alone.

Asmo: That poor guy, he seems to be so heartbroken. I feel bad...

Belphie: It's for his own peace too. Despite his change.... Haruka is still with Simeon so he can't.

Solomon: Unless....

Asmo: Don't you dare! [smacks Solomon]

Solomon: I haven't finished!

Asmo: Are you implying her to be like you?! To have multiple lovers?!

Solomon: May- [gets smacked by Ichigo]

Ichigo: She's not like you. Stop trying to make people into a polyamorous person.

Beel: Certainly not. She's pretty much loyal to whoever her lover is. For now, I might do what Asmo said.

Asmo: Hm?

Ichigo: What?! Beel! Wtf?! [got carried away to their room, help]

Asmo: oooh! Oh my Lord! Don't forget the silencing spell!!

Solomon: Holy sht-

Belphie: What-

Lucifer: [facepalms]

Asmo: OML...he locked the door-

Solomon: ..... where are the angels when we need them....

Yeah.... that's pretty much it! We'll see you in our sequel "human world adventures". See you guys soon~^^

[ohbeaby]

Flipped chapter 1

I just want to say this is based off of @ask-the-flipped-brothers AU! Please go check out their page and support their amazing work!

If you prefer reading on Ao3 here you go! 

The room's tension could be cut through with a knife. Two men stood glaring at each other from across the dining table fully covered with food, yet none of the seven residents seemed the least bit interested in any of it. 

“Belph-”

“No, don’t even think to say my name you rotten scumbag.” A man with heavy bags under his crazed eyes spat out. He stepped around the table as he spoke, towards a taller man with white hair and a brown suit. “Are you really just so desperate to forget what happened to us? What happened to her?”

“You need to step down, Belphegor. This isn’t ideal for any of us.” The gentleman's gaze was steady but to the others around him it was also clearly weary of the one before him. “We have to follow his orders, you know that as much as any of us.”

“I’m not even going to listen to any of this nonsense. He’s a lunatic to think this union would work and even more deranged to think a human would live with us!” Belphegor gripped the top of a chair close by him, snapping the top of the side off. The food of the dinning table long abandoned by the conversation at hand.

“B-Belphie! You can’t s-say that!” Another man in the room whispered with fear in his eyes, wringing his hands under his sweater.

“Ehhh, he’s kind of just saying what’s on all of our minds isn’t he, Asmodeus?” A guy with headphones grumbled before focusing back on the game in his hands.

“I mean...isn’t Diavolo able to listen in on our conversation?” A blond asked scratching the back of his head and looking around the room.

“Yeah, he keeps using that to stop me from pranking him! It’s very inconvenient honestly.” A man with black hair laughed while the blond just turned and glared at him in barely contained wrath.

“Ch...guess we should watch what we say then...damn you Lucifer.” The gamer growled out while the man with jet black hair gasped in shock.

“Me?! Why me Leviathan?!”

“Well maybe it has something to do with your utter lack of compet-”

“Enough.” The last man in the room spoke with a voice that could have frozen an army in an instant, his glare was cold but otherwise he seemed mostly indifferent to everything going on.

“Beelzebub is right, stop your bickering.” The man in a suit sighed pinching between his eyes in frustration. “Now Belphegor, I know this isn’t ideal but-”

“Oh shut it Mammon. I’m just going to fix this myself.” Belphegor turned and stormed towards the door leading out of the dining room.

“Yourself? What are you planning Belphie?” Mammon glared at his retreating form.

“Nothing much, just something that should have been done a long time ago.”

The door slammed closed leaving the rest of the people present in silence.

~~

A last minute change to the plans had caused quite a bit of a stir in the residence of the house of lamentation. Instead of the original singular student they would be giving housing to, Diavolo had thought it might be a better idea for each of the brothers to aid an exchange student themselves. The only real issue with that was there were only 7 real bedrooms in the house and each brother had already taken up 6.

Diavolos solution to this little problem had been the real spark for distress, the brothers could just share rooms with the exchange students. He thought it might be a better way to get to understand them and in turn them understand the brothers and demon culture. While none of the brothers caused any sort of stir on the matter during the meeting with him, as soon as they got back to their home they were all a mess.

Asmodeus had given a meek shriek as he dashed to his room, crying about how uncomfortable it would be to have to share a room with someone else. Satan was doing some sort of breathing exercise off in the corner, clearly feeling anxious about his own personal space being invaded as well. Mammon kept his composure but kept glaring at his bedroom door with disdain. Lucifer just laughed and said how this could all be treated like an extended sleepover, no one was amused. Leviathan was similar to Asmo, yelling about how he couldn't stand the thought of some normie human being in his streams. Beelzebub was quiet, even more than usual, everyone knew he was harboring a great deal of anger over this as well as Belphegor being sent to the human world for the program.

Overall, the house was a mess of emotions and Mammon was just thankful that nothing was being destroyed yet. When the brothers sat down for dinner that night they had all mostly calmed down. While not at all happy with the impending arrivals of their new guests, all of them knew it was futile to try and sway Diavolo when he got a new idea set in his head.

“This is absolute garbage.” Leviathan groaned, dramatically leaning back in his chair with his arm over his eyes. “We seriously have to room with humans? Can’t we just shove them all in the spare or something?”

“I don’t think Diavolo would appreciate us trying to shove six of his exchange students in a single guest room with only one bed.” Mammon leveled a stare at Leviathan. “Unless you want to explain to him why all the exchange students have been sleeping poorly and can’t do their homework properly.”

Leviathan gulped and shook his head, quickly going back to scrolling through his phone. The blond on the other hand was wringing his hands nervously.

“So we have to have those...what were they called again? They look like lamps but they’re for Vitamin D or something?” He asked quietly.

“I don’t think they’re really called anything Satan. They’re supposed to replicate the human realms sunlight though! Isn’t that cool!” Lucifer laughed. “I bet other demons would love to see them. I mean they have Diavolos magic! That’s got to attract some people to at least investigate what it is!”

“It’s not cool Lucifer.” Satan growled out, stabbing the meat on his plate violently. “I have very delicate books and I don’t know how that thing will affect them over time.”

“I don’t think Diavolo would give us something that could damage our belongings.” Asmodeous whispered, just moving his food about his plate, uninterested in eating anything. 

“I’ve seen what magic he will be using for the lamps, it’s similar to the kind he uses for the beach. You shouldn’t have to worry about anything being damaged, Satan.” 

Satan seemed to go at ease over Mammon’s confirmation and went back to just eating his food. Everything was fairly quiet for the rest of dinner and, after cleaning up their dishes, they all collectively agreed to call it an early night.

Tomorrow was bound to be interesting after all.

~~

“Welcome to the Devildom.” A man with red hair, and a suit to match spoke, confidently from a seat high above. “...Oh, pardon me. Feeling a bit shocked, are we?” 

Six people with various expressions, though most in confusion and concern, looked up at him. None had the slightest clue what was going on or who anyone else in the room was.

“Well, that’s understandable. You’ve only just arrived, after all.” The man continued.”As humans, it will probably take a little while for you to adjust to things here in the Devildom.”

“The Devildom?” one human asked, crossing their arms and leveling an unimpressed stare at the man in red. The other humans subtly moved closer to the more confident one while cautiously eyeing the other 5 people seated below the man in red.

“Yes, exactly, the Devildom. I see that you catch on quickly. Excellent.” The man clapped his hands together and stood up. “I supposed I should start introducing myself. My name is Diavolo.”

The man appeared in front of all of the humans causing a few of them to gasp and jump back in surprise.

“I am the ruler of all demons, and all here know of me.” His expression was no longer joyful or kind, instead it was one of a very confident leader who would bring down the hammer to anyone who threatened his kingdom. “And someday soon, I will be crowned king of the Devildom.”

“That...seems like a contradictory statement.” Another human muttered as they looked around the room curiously. “To be a ruler but not yet a king, aren’t they the same?”

“Demons is more my question, what kind of roleplaying is going on here?” The confident human whispers back looking more annoyed.

It seems like the human's quiet questions either weren't heard or were ignored completely as the man goes on to explain the Royal Academy of Diavolo, or RAD as he suggests it be referred to. He also explains how the room they are currently in is the assembly hall for RAD where the officers hold meetings.

“I am the president of said council.” He finishes, crossing his arms.

“Choose one occupation please.” The confident human mutters. “Next he’s going to claim he’s the pope or- ack!” The curious human elbowed the confident one to quiet their complaints before looking at Diavolo.

“So why are we all here?”

“That would be where I step in.” A man with tanned skin and white hair stood up from his seat under Diavolos previous seat.

“This is Mammon. He is a demon and the Avatar of Greed.” Diavolo smiled and walked over to stand by the man. “He’s also the vice president of the student council and my right-hand man.” Diavolo gives Mammon a slap on the back. “Beyond that, he’s also a close friend of mine.”

“Diavolo, we need to focus on getting everyone introduced and settled..” Mammon sighed and looked over to the 6 humans with an unreadable expression. “Speaking on behalf of the entire student body I offer you all a heartfelt welcome.”

“I still haven’t had my question answered.” The curious human glared at Mammon. “You’ve both talked a lot but haven’t given much information.”

Mammon stared at the human for a moment before a smirk graced his lips. “...Interesting. Mamo at least is different from Solomon. Lets see if the rest of you can compare.”

The one who had asked the question, now identified as Mamo, had a shocked expression on their face before it quickly morphed into frustration. “Wait, how did you-”

“Diavolo believes that we demons should start strengthening our relationship with both the human world and the Celestial Realm.” Mammon cut Mamo off. “As a first step toward this goal, we’ve decided to institute an exchange program.” A scoff was heard from behind Mammon as a demon with purple hair leaned back on his hands in the chair.

“I’d say put some quotes around ‘we’ve decided’.”

“Leviathan, refrain from interrupting will you?” Mammon sighed and pinched his nose.

“So are we adding dictator to your list of titles or is that a bit on the nose?” The confident human glared over at Diavolo. Before the ruler could say anything Leviathan burst out with laughter.

“Damn Laken, at least I won’t be too bored with you around!”

“How the hell do you know my name, you knock off Nessie?!”

“Nessie? My name is Leviathan you pathetic human!”

“Leviathan is supposed to be a giant sea serpent you look like a damn twink.”

As they had been arguing the two had started walking towards each other clearly frustrated with the other. Mammon quickly stepped in between the two, trying to hold his brother back.

“Twink?! I’m a demon and could wipe your pathetic existence from all three realms!”

“Well wipe your insult book with it too then! So far you’ve only called me pathetic and a human, both of which could easily be attributed to you at the moment. Oh great and powerful Leviathan who looks like he could just be some shut in who lives in his moms basement.”

“Oh fuck you, I do not even have a mom or whatever, I live with my brothers.” He jesters to the group behind him and Mammon.

“I’m sorry you have to support him, I don’t see how he has a job of any sort with this personality.” Laken looked over at the group with a hand on their chest feigning concern. “I’m sure he will find his place in the world soon.”

“Oh you-”

“E-enough!” Mammon pushed Leviathan back to his seat where almost all the brothers were trying to hide their laughter at the argument.

“Why the hell are all of you laughing?!” Leviathan yelled before huffing back in his seat when the light giggling didn’t stop.

Mammon turned back to Laken and the other humans, an amused smirk over his lips. “Back on subject. We sent 2 demons each to the human and celestial realms and welcomed 9 students into our realm. 2 from the celestial realm and 7 from your realm.”

“7? I only see 6 of us.” Mamo said looking around the room. All the demons grimace a bit.

“Yes, 7. Solomon is the other exchange student but he came earlier.” Mammon explained.

“Must be a swell guy for you to pull that kind of face.” Laken said.

“I’d prefer not to discuss that matter. You all have been chosen to participate in our exchange program. Your period of stay will be one year and you will have to work on the tasks assigned to you at RAD. At the end of the year you each will have to write a paper about your exchange here in the Devildom.” Mammon turned to go sit down in his seat. Diavolo had already returned to his previous seat and was just observing the conversation.

“Tasks?” two of the humans said at the same time before looking at each other. “Jinx...double jinx...triple jinx…” this goes on for a bit longer while the demons all look on confused as to what the humans are doing.

“Yes um...tasks. You are all exchange students so you will be expected to complete assignments throughout the year.” Mammon explained going back to the other humans.

“Ha! I won!” One of the humans lightly punched the other in the shoulder.

“Aw, well that was fun at least.”

“What was that all about?” Asmodeus asks Satan who just shrugs.

“But don’t fret humans, we are all here to assist you with your tasks. Each of you has been assigned to one of us to look after you and make sure you survive the year.” Mammon jesters to his brothers and himself. “Though we are missing...Lucifer…”

All the humans froze at that name, even if they didn’t quite recognize Mammon or Leviathan it would be hard to know have at least heard of Lucifer. Mammon quickly hands out cell phones that he calls DDD’s and explains how all of the brothers contact information is set up in the devices. Mammon instructs one human to call Lucifer on their phone, though the human grows pale at the prospect of it.

“Ah so that’s why you’ve all been so quiet the last few minutes.” Mammon sighs. “I assure you Lucifer is much different than the stories you’ve heard on him, though whether that’s a good or a bad thing is up for debate.”

“How reassuring.” The human mumbled as they hit the dial button. The phone rang for a few moments before a groggy voice answered it.

“Yeah? Who is it?”

“Uh...my name’s Luka? I was told to call you?”

“Luka...like the human?”

“...yes?”

“Shit what? I thought that was later on in the day.”

“Um…” The human looked up at Mammon as they listened to some shuffling on the other side of the line. “He sounds like he just woke up maybe?”

Mammon gave a growl and snatched the phone from Luka’s hand and put it up to his ear. A colorful string of threats was said in a variety of languages before he handed the phone back to Luka, the call ended.

“He’ll be here shortly, until then I suppose each of us should introduce ourselves to the humans we are watching over.”

All the brothers stood up and walked up to the humans and began introducing themselves.

“As you already know, my name is Mammon. I’m the Avatar of Greed and I’ll be looking after you throughout your stay here.” Mammon stuck out his hand which Mamo shook.

“And as you know I’m Mamo. I’m still confused as to why each of us specifically was chosen for this program, I don’t recall signing up for any of this. Do my college credits at least transfer?”

“You question things a lot don’t you?” Mammon smirked.

“And you seem to have a knack for avoiding answers.” Mamo quipped back. Mammon laughed and explained that he would tell her more once they got back to the house.

Leviathan walked up to Laken and both just glared at each other.

“You can not be serious.” Laken said.

“You think I want this either?” Leviathan growled back.

“At least you’re still in your realm! I didn’t even get a chance to grab my drawing pad or any of my games!” Laken threw their hands up in the air in frustration.

“Oh boo hoo, I’m having to give up precious space in my room for your ungrateful ass so suck it up.”

“Your room? Don’t tell me we’re going to have to share.” Lakens hands dropped by their side as they looked at Leviathan in confusion.

“We are and I hate it.” Leviathan threw his head back with a groan and muttering about how he had to move all his collectables around to make space.

“Well I guess we are going to have to learn to get along huh Nessie?”

“Will you stop calling me that? My name is Leviathan, Avatar of Jealousy.”

“I feel like Avatar of shut-ins would be more fitting.”

“I’m going to make sure to play all my video game music loudly to make sure you don’t sleep.”

“Joke’s on you, that’s what I sleep to anyways.” Laken mumbled as they followed Leviathan out the door, presumably to the house.

Satan had started up an engaging conversation with one of the humans about their favorite kinds of rocks.

“Oh personally I love bismuth! The rainbows are so pretty on top of the cubic pattern!” The human smiled.

“I agree, though I think black opals are prettier just because you get so many rainbows at once.” Satan laughed.

“Oh! I haven’t even introduced myself, sorry. My name is Saku, nice to meet you!” Saku stuck their hand out which Satan was quick to grab and shake.

“Nice to meet you Saku. I’m glad I’m getting a nice human to hang out with. My name is Satan and I’m the Avatar of Wrath!”

Saku blinked a few times and tilted their head. “Humans sure have a lot of stories wrong then huh? Also you don’t seem very wrathful, I’d describe you as bubbly if anything.”

Satan sighed and hung his head. “If you’re referring to how humans like to lump Lucifer and I’s name together then yes, you all have it very wrong. I am nothing like that utter imbecile! He is a pathetic waste of space and I hate him more than words can describe.” 

As he spoke his anger grew more and more apparent and Saku could have sworn he saw a flicker of some kind of feathery scarf around the others neck. Just as quickly as his anger came though it dissipated into a pleasant smile.

“But I appreciate that you think I’m more bubbly than wrathful! I do try to be friendly!”

Saku just gave a small laugh and patted Satans shoulder who looked confused as to why the other was laughing. The two started up their rock discussion again as they made their way out the door.

Asmodeus was standing nervously near another human fidgeting with his sweater.

“So um...what’s a jinx?”

“Huh? Oh! You mean that game I was playing with them?” The human pointed to Saku and Asmodeus nodded. “It’s a game you play when you say the same thing as someone else at the same time. You both just say jinx as many times as you can and whoever is the slowest loses.”

“O-oh...humans are strange.”

“I agree.”

Both stood in a bit of an awkward silence before the human turned to Asmodeus again and stuck their hand out.

“Well um...I’m Aero? I like your sweater, it looks cute on you.”

“Ehh? Oh um...thank you…” Asmodeus hid their face behind his hands and shook his head. “Ahh um...my name is Asmodeus. I’m the Avatar of L-Lust.”

“Well it’s nice to meet you Asmodeus!” Aero took their hand back, getting the feeling the other wasn’t one to like being touched too much. “Can you tell me a bit about some of the courses I’ll be taking? Also Mammon and Diavolo both mentioned something about everyone being demons? I’d love to know more about that if you’re willing to share!”

Asmodeus stared intensely in their eyes for a few quick seconds before a confused look came over his face. He just nodded and quietly started explaining some of the different aspects of RAD to Aero as the two left the room.

Beelzebub was just...staring down at his human who seemed to be growing more and more uncomfortable by the moment. Neither had said a thing to the other for a few minutes and it took Diavolo finally coming down to start a conversation between the two.

“Bean right?” The human nodded to Diavolo as he motioned to Beelzebub. “This is Beelzebub, he’s the Avatar of Gluttony and also a star player on our fangol team!”

“Fangol?” Bean questioned looking up at Beelzebub questioningly.

“It’s similar to rugby.” Beelzebub said before walking towards the doors.

“O-oh…” Bean whispered and quickly followed him when Diavolo gently pushed them towards the door.

“I’m here! Don’t kill me!” Lucifer burst through the door just as Beelzebub was leaving and nearly knocked Bean over. Bean was pushed into Beelzebub and quickly apologized to the other before finally making their way back to the house.

“Lucifer, late as always I see.” Diavolo sighed as he stood next to the last human. “You’re in charge of them. Remember, if anything happens to them I’ll personally make sure you feel their pain tenfold, understood?”

“Yuuuuup! Haha!” Lucifer walked over to the human with a giant smile on his face. “My name is Lucifer, Avatar of Pride!”

“Ah yup...just like the stories.” The human laughed while Diavolo chuckled from some ways behind them. “My name is Luka.”

“Sweet! Now that that’s out of the way let’s go. I have to meet up with some people in...well I think I was supposed to meet up with them 15 minutes ago but I’m sure they can wait.” Lucifer grabbed the humans hand and just about dragged them out the room with Diavolo yelling at him to remember that they are human.

All the humans thought that this was certainly an interesting way to start their day.

[charliesradiodemon]

Arranged Marriage AU (Part 2)

Part 1 HERE

(Thank you for the support on the last chapter! I’m honestly so thankful that there are people who like my fic. I hope you guys enjoy the next part! I’ll try to keep uploading every few days/every week!)

Part 2

Alastor was fully aware what marrying the princess of Hell and heir to the throne meant. He and Charlie would be the next rulers of Hell should anything happen to Lucifer and Lilith. Not that that was likely to happen, but it was a formality. It was about safety in ensuring someone with the blood of Lucifer would remain on the throne. Alastor was just there to ensure Charlie makes it to the throne.

In the grand scheme of things ruling Hell didn’t mean much more than a title, seeing how Hell was run on pure chaos and fear. It was strength and influence that made sinners bow. But Lucifer and Lilith happen to be the two most powerful and oldest beings in Hell, making them the optimal rulers of the kingdom of suffering. However Charlie was not so lucky to have the reputation her mother or father had.

Alastor wasn’t interested in ruling Hell. If he had ultimate ruling over Hell, what else would there be to do? No, what he wanted was the unpredictable events that were bound to happen from then on. The attention, the jealousy and maybe even new challengers. This kind of event wasn’t common. There’s never been a “princess of Hell” before Charlie let alone a marriage between a pure Hell-born demon and a mortal soul. It was going to be a legendary event and Alastor was far too giddy for it all.

That was the future though, for now he sat with his business partner and fiancee as she cried her eyes out.

“-and then I told Vaggie and she just… left. She didn’t even look angry and didn’t say anything when she left and… and I still haven’t seen her…” Alastor sat at a professional distance away from his teary eyed fiancee. He felt a tickle in his chest as he took in the sight of her. It was an irritation that was too deep under the skin to scratch without maiming himself. He didn’t know exactly how to handle the situation. Usually he’d revel in another’s despair, but this was different.

The usual despair around him meant lesser demons groveling as they begged for mercy in vain. The sweet taste of false hope delighted him all the way up until he turned around and crushed it.

But this would be different. She was his investment and pleasant company. He may even go as far to call the lovely demoness a friend. Before he met her, he planned to soak up all of her naivety until her inevitable delicious demise. But even the thought of that didn’t seem to sit exactly right with him. He had to admit he had a bit of a soft spot for her already. She’s surpassed his expectations without even trying and it was something Alastor couldn't quite understand. She hadn't changed. Charlie Magne was still the naive, witty and selfless princess he'd met half a year ago. So how did she manage to keep hold of his interest and rid him of all malicious intent toward her?

With a small flourish, he materialized a tissue box for her. He held it out to her as she pulled several sheets with a polite gratuitous smile. He let the box sit between them on the couch and let her dry her eyes and clear her sinuses before he spoke. “She will return. I’m not sure when, but she’ll come back to you, that I’m sure of,”

“H-how do you know?” She asked. Suddenly a look of realization hit her teary face. She turned to look up him and paused. “Wait why am I letting you help me? You’re the reason why she left!” Charlie snapped. She stood and stormed in front of Alastor to stare him down. “Get out.” Her abruptly pitched down voice ordered him as she sharply thrusted her finger toward the door.

‘Ah there she is…’ Her true form peaked out ever so slightly over her tear stained face. The red glow of her eyes were not from their puffiness, nor were the dark markings on her face streaked makeup. Her glorious sharp teeth even made an entrance. ‘She’s quite beautiful in this state’ Alastor thought as his grin widened.

Alastor leaned back into the couch and chuckled. “Did I forbid you from having lovers? No, I don’t think so. You can do what you wish Charlie. This is Hell after all, it’s not like taking a lover or two while married would mean anything here. Most of the members of the royal court partake in adultery,” he stood, forcing her to take a step back, but she did not back down in intensity. “This union is nothing more than a partnership after all! It’s a partnership where all of us will benefit!” He chuckled, threw his arms out to the sides in grand gestures then turned toward the exit. “The announcement is later today Charlie, I hope you don’t forget to dress in your best and smile!” He began his casual stroll out the door until he felt a tug at his tailcoat.

The very sudden snap of his head turning a full 180 startled Charlie, but she did not let go despite the defensive murderous aura he gave off. She’d calmed down and returned to her doll-like appearance. “Tell me what you mean when you said we’d all benefit from this marriage,” she demanded. Her red puffy eyes and pout reminded Alastor of a child who’d just thrown a tantrum. Yet he could still feel and see the determination which he admits that he admired in her. He relaxed from his menacing state for the strangely brave if not foolish little lady in front of him.

He twisted the rest of his body with his head, forcing Charlie to let him go. “You’ll see in due time, trust me,” he answered with a wink.

“Okay but you’re like, the least trustworthy person out there you know that?” She questioned without hesitation.

Alastor heartily guffawed and feigned devastation. The sound effect of a gasp could be heard from him before he spoke. “Oh Charlie you’re too cruel to accuse me of such a thing! Have I ever once broken a promise to you?” He leaned to get in her face and refused to break eye contact until she did.

Charlie crossed her arms and thought about it for a moment. “No… But it has only been a few months, Al.” she pouted. Alastor stood up straight and pat her head gently.

“Regardless! I think it will be a pleasant surprise once you figure it out. Consider what will come as part of my engagement present to you!” He turned once more and left, leaving Charlie to stand there and watch him leave. She was still obviously upset, but somehow she felt a twinge of relief. It was as if one problem was lifted from her shoulders, but the weight of Vaggie still remained. If Alastor was right, she’d have to try to talk to Vaggie and work things out.

Charlie sat back down on the couch then splayed herself over the couch. It was only for a moment though as she shot up from her prone position. “Wait, part?”

Part 3 

[multiharlot]

angel || reid/emily x angel!reader (4)

summary: a certain pair of people deserve an explanation. so that’s exactly what you give them

warnings: mentions of hell and demons, mentions of soul transference.

series masterlist

masterlist

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

y/n’s pov

i took a deep breath before i walked into a bullpen, a moment of dejavu hitting me. 

“y/n...you’re back.” emily smiles.

“i told you i would be. and...i can’t lie.” i chuckle as i awkwardly shrug my shoulder. 

“where umm...where’d you go?” spencer asks, standing from his chair and taking a seat on his desk. 

“where do you think, genius? she just found out you’re both her soulmate. she clearly went to god.” morgan snorts, leaning back into his chair. 

“no...actually. i umm...i went to see my brother. gabriel.” i nod my head. 

“your brother is gabriel? like the an- oh right.” garcia nods her head, having a total blonde moment, and i giggle. 

“i missed you.” i smile, rocking back and forth on my feet.

“i missed you more.” she sighs, walking over to me and wrapping her arms around my shoulder.

i pull my wing out, wrapping it around her body. 

“oh...oh it’s so warm.” she gushes, snuggling further into me. 

i smile, holding my hands in front of my body. 

“aren’t you worried about people seeing those?” hotch asks, and i shake my head. 

“only you guys can see them. the only way people can see a guardian angel’s wings is if it’s their own guardian angel. so to everyone else, it just looks like garcia is giving me a hug.” i shrug. 

“that’s...really cool.” spencer smiles at me, and i nod my head, shifting my gaze to the ground. 

“yeah it is.” i mumble, and an awkward silence fills the team. 

“i think we should give these three some space.” rossi suggests slowly, and i smile at him, nodding my head. 

he gives me a tight smile and i reach my hands out to emily’s and spencer’s. 

“come on, i need you guys to come with me” i say, giving them both a soft smile. 

“should i be scared?” emily smirks jokingly at me. 

i chuckle, shaking my head at her. 

“never with me around.”

they both grab hold on my hands, and i intertwine our fingers, leading them out of the bullpen. 

“where are we going?” spencer asks as i stop in front of the large window. 

“just...close your eyes.” i say, gripping their hands tightly. 

they look at each other, then to me, before sighing and closing their eyes. i wrap my wings tightly around their bodies, huddling all of us together as i whisper the spell beneath my breath. 

“is that latin?”

“spencer shut up.”

a small giggle escapes my lips and i feel a cool breeze against my wings. i let go of their hands and unwrap them from my hold. 

“you can open your eyes now.”

they both timidly open one eye at a time, gasps leaving their mouth as they did. 

“oh my god are we in heaven?” spencer asks as he looks around the garden with wide eyes. 

“close, but no.” i chuckle, shaking my head.

“did you...change your clothes?” emily asks as she looks down at my white dress.

“no. this is my normal angel attire. i usually wear something different when i come see you guys. i don’t need everyone thinking i’m getting married or going to prom every time i come here.” i giggle. 

“so...we’re still on earth?” emily questions as she reaches out to touch one of the pink flowers.

“eh. sort of. garden of eden.”

spencer gasps and his eyes widen.

“but i thought-”

“it’s still here. god wanted to keep all humans out after the mishap of adam and eve. but there’s something here that we need. and i also umm...i owe you guys an explanation and i thought it was fitting to do it here.”

“in the...garden of eden?” he questions, raising an eyebrow at me.

“just...trust me?” i ask, holding my hands out to the two of them. 

“always.” emily smiles, grabbing my hand. 

spencer places his hand in mine as i lead them through the garden. we stop in front of the crystal clear river. i kneel down in front of the river, and emily and spencer stay standing. i tug on their arms, motioning for them to sit with me. 

“this...is raguel’s river. raguel is essentially the archangel of love. he helps instill peace and harmony within a relationship by providing people with maturity, understanding, and balance.” i explain, reaching forward and letting the running water flow through my hands.

“is that why we’re here? so he can help us understand what’s going on?” spencer asks as he unconsciously scoots closer to me.

“we’re here, so that you guys can understand. this is...a very complicated and messy situation. and by drinking the water, it’ll provide you with some clarity that you may not have otherwise.” i explain gently. 

they both look at me and i nod my head.

“just cup it in your hands and drink.” i smile encouragingly. 

they reach forward, cupping the water and sipping from their hands. 

“i think that’s the best water i’ve ever had.” emily smiles, making me nod. 

spencer wipes his hand down in his pants and readjusts his position. going from kneeling to sitting criss cross and emily does the same. i sighed, now for the hard part. 

“so...the reason why you both see gold is because you’re both my soulmate. i was half human and half angel. my father, the archangel zadkiel, fell in love with a mortal woman in heaven. and from that union, came me. so, when i was born. both halves of me were assigned a soulmate. the human half, and the angel half.” i explain slowly as i place my hands atop theirs. 

“and when my human half died, a piece of my soul went to hell and heaven gained another angel.”

“wait...why would a piece of your soul go to hell?” spencer questions, and a sigh fell past my lips. 

“because that’s where maeve’s soul was.”

he pauses, staring at me with wide eyes. 

“why would her soul be-”

“i can’t answer that. that choice was for god and god alone. all i know, is that in order to bring her back, i had to trade my human soul for hers. meaning, that one of your guys’ soulmate, is stuck in hell because of a choice that i made. and...after i determine who my angel soulmate is...one of you will be left alone.”

their eyebrows furrow and emily shakes her head.

“but...that’s not fair.”

“i know. but i warned you that there was a price to pay. and there’s nothing lucifer loves more than the taste of misery. i paid my price. half of my soul is missing and stuck in hell for the rest of eternity. but...lucifer is still angry. because i still get to be alive and feel love and be happy. so he’s waiting to collect the sorrow he feels is owed.”

“and who’s sorrow is that?” spencer asks, his eyes brimming with tears. 

i could feel his guilt climbing through my throat, so i reach over, grabbing his hands. 

“it’s not your fault. i need you to know that. none of this is your fault. i made this choice and i thought the deed was done, but lucifer wants more. and if i have any power at all, nobody will have to pay him the sorrow he feels he’s owed. i will fix this, i promise you. but for now, i need you both to know that this journey is going to be difficult. it’s going to be difficult and you need to be prepared for the loss you might-”

“no. no i’m not losing you again.” emily says firmly as she shakes her head. 

“hey hey...you-” i stop myself before i could say the things i wanted to say to her. 

i couldn’t lie. 

“i don’t know how this is going to play out. but what i do know is neither of you will suffer any sort of unnecessary pain. i can assure you of that.”

“so how do we know? how do we know which is which?” emily asks, a hopeful glint in her eyes. 

i stare back at her, my mouth gaping slightly. 

“i...i don’t know.”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“so let me get this straight. they’re both your soulmate?” derek asks, pointing between emily and reid.

“sort of. one is my human soulmate, the other is my angel soulmate.”

“so what’s the difference? how can you know?” garcia asks, leaning into the conversation.

“i don’t know. i mean i think i know, but i’m not sure-”

i feel a shiver run through my wings and i shake my head. 

“sorry. sorry i...i have to go. my brother is calling. but...i’ll be back.” i say. 

the team nods their head and i run out the doors, heading back up to see my brother. i walk through the doors to see gabriel and god standing over a table full of books. 

“you called?”

“we’ve found a way out of this mess. we don’t like it, and we don’t think you will either. but it’s a way out.”

taglist:

@dreatine​​ @slytherinintj13​​ @mileven-reddie​​ @eleventhdoctorsangel​​ @haileymorelikestupid​

[hekate1308]

Shared Joy, Double Joy

Drowley AU - Crowley is a demon who happens to possess a mechanic called Dean Winchester. Enjoy!

Dear God, pathetic doesn’t even begin to cover it –

Dean blinked. Or rather, he tried to blink, found that he had no control over his body, and stayed rather remarkably calm once he realized.

He’d never felt like anything like this before. He was most definitely moving, but he hadn’t decided to do so; furthermore, the street he was walking down was nowhere near his home –

What the hell, is this Vegas? he exclaimed without actually saying the words. He’d have to figure out later how this was possible.

Or not.

Because a strange kind of silence followed the sentence in his mind, almost as if he were talking to someone and they were studying him...

You should definitely not be awake, the same voice he had heard a moment ago declared. For some reason, even though “hearing” was an exaggeration, considering it was more like they were... thinking in Dean’s head without permission, he knew they had a British accent. And didn’t that make everything even more confusing.

What do you mean? I am awake!

Yes, and you shouldn’t be. Don’t make me repeat myself, it’s particularly annoying.

It’s particularly annoying, he mocked them before demanding, What is going on?

What then followed would probably have best been described as a struggle, if he had been able to move his limbs and he had actually been fighting anyone. At the end of his, he was panting... in his mind. And the silence that ensued felt more... intrigued than anything else.

I have to admit I am surprised, the voice then told him.

He snorted. Great. Now, what’s going on?

They sighed. Since I can’t seem to put you under – and really, that is quite interesting, I have to say – I’m a demon and am currently possessing you.

What!?

Demon. Me. Possessing. You.

If he could have rolled his eyes, he would have. Demons don’t –

He didn’t finish the thought because, if he hadn’t spontaneously gone insane (and this certainly didn’t sound like any kind of crazy he’d ever heard of) he was possessed.

Knew you weren’t half as mentally deficient as you believe yourself to be.

Fine, okay, so you’re a demon. But why would a demon possess me? Dean always thought demons were supposed to tempt people, and he certainly didn’t need any help in the immorality or vice department.

Had to lie low for a while.

Oh? What gives?

He figured he might as well get the whole story since there wasn’t much he could do. He was still pretty calm about this whole thing. Maybe he was hooked up on some kind of demon juice?

Demon juice? Now they sounded indignant. What do you take me for?

How about you tell me?

They sighed. Fine. If you have to know –

It’s my body, figure I’ve got the right –

Do you want to hear this or not?

Dean was silent.

I’m a crossroads demon. The best in the business.

Wow, aren’t we humble.

Just telling the truth, darling.

Fine. But if you’re that good at your job, why are you here... in me, then? Shouldn’t you be haunting some crossroads forcing some poor smug to make a deal?

I never force anyone to make a deal with me. And I had to leave Hell for a while. There were... complications.

Like union-strike complications or slept-with-your-bosses-wife complications?

I... angered Lucifer.

Wait, you upset the literal devil?

I didn’t set out to do so. But the fact is, we disagree on a lot of things. And so I decided to lay low for a few weeks at least. And just my luck, I happen to possess the down-on-his-luck mechanic with as many mummy and daddy issues to sort through as the day is long.

Hey –

If it makes you feel better, my mother was a witch.

Why would you want to make me feel better?

Excellent question. They sounded almost... puzzled.

Any chance I can get you to get out of my noggin?

None. Like I said, I have to lie low.

Then what are we doing in Vegas?

Excellent spot for making deals.

That’s not exactly lying low though, is it? He pointed out smugly.

I just wanted a bit of money to live as I am used to –

Again, lying low? This ain’t it, buddy.

A pause. Then – Name’s Crowley.

Dean Winchester. But I figure you already know that.

Indeed I do.

Any chance you haven’t been all over my brain finding out every last thing you can about me? Another pause. That’s a no then.

You should be honoured. Humans normally don’t interest me.

And what makes me special?

Crowley didn’t answer. He – for some reason, Dean was convinced that he was talking to a guy – instead suddenly declared rather dramatically, I suppose we will have to return to your rat-infested apartment then.

That was two years ago, and I handled it.

You could afford better, but you don’t. Why?

Dean mind-shrugged. What’s the point? I mostly use it for sleeping, anyway.

Because you’ve been doing so much of that lately. I can tell you’re exhausted, and this isn’t even my body.

Exactly! How about you don’t go “Look at your life, look at your choices” while you are out here possessing people? Wait, what time is it? I gotta go to work.

If you think I am actually going to that dingy little shop to placate your whining idiot of a boss by working on the cars of douche bags who don’t even recognize what talent is being thrown away at –

Sorry to tell you, but I am still here, still awake, and I can and will annoy you. I need that job to pay for my rent.

He let that thought fester until Crowley asked, What are you suggesting?

I thought the best crossroads demon out there would recognize an offer when he heard one, Dean answered, wondering where he got that idea from. Then again, he was already possessed, what else was he supposed to do?

Eventually Crowley said, You have my attention.

The deal they struck went as follows: Dean wouldn’t try to throw Crowley out – he wasn’t quite sure how he would have gone about that, but it seemed like the safest option to agree – and he’d allow the demon to stay in his place and act as Dean Winchester half of the time, while he’d be able to control his body for the other half. After some more bickering, Crowley had reluctantly agreed that half the time meant half the time that Dean was awake, for he soon found that he could still sleep when he wanted. Of course he could have gone under while Crowley was in control, but he didn’t trust the demon that far.

He turned out to be a surprisingly easy house guest. Hell, he even did the dishes.

You like my burgers, don’t you, Dean told him one day.

They do taste better than those greased-loaded heart attacks waiting to happen you like to devour at least once a day, Crowley shot back. After a pause he added, You would make a good chef.

Ha bloody ha. Dean usually tried to imitate his accent when he annoyed him.

I mean it. Although don’t think I haven’t noticed what really interests you.

If he had actually been holding the plate Crowley was cleaning, he would have dropped it. We agreed. No snooping around in my subconscious.

I got all of that before you were ever aware I was here, darling.

Of course he had.

It was just a silly little day dream, is all.

I wouldn’t call a nursing degree silly.

It was nothing. Drop it.

Miraculously, Crowley did.

After a while, Dean didn’t consider it absolutely necessary to watch over every little thing Crowley said or did when he was in control, and he now and then dived back into his mind to listen to the music, read the books or watch the movies he’d memorized.

He realized that had been a mistake when he resurfaced one day just to check up on how things were going. Really, part of him had been relieved that their family lunch fell into Crowley’s time slot. Once upon a time, he had been glad to see Mom; but since he had realized that that she hardly listened to what he had to say, as opposed to Sam’s monologues about his job, he’d grown rather disenchanted with it all.

Plus, this time they were being introduced to Sam’s new girlfriend, and they usually only heard “mechanic”, assumed the worst and barely talked to him, so there was that.

And then he got back from watching The Untouchables and the first thing he heard coming out of his own mouth was –

“Slaughter-House Five is superior to Cat’s Cradle, but I still think the later is very fascinating –“

“Oh yes” the new girl, Sarah he remembered, replied enthusiastically, “The depiction of bokononism –“

Crowley!

I was fed up with being lectured or ignored. Also, your brother’s and mother’s expressions have been utterly hilarious. Plus, don’t pretend that’s not your opinion.

It is but –

“I didn’t know you liked to read” Mom said, looking puzzled.

“I’m a man of mystery.”

Sarah giggled. “I really have to congratulate you, Sammy.”

Only I get to call him that, Dean told him, even though he was trying his best not to laugh.

Crowley had been right about their expressions.

He supposed one little slip up couldn’t hurt.

And then Crowley got bored.

It had only been a matter of time, Dean supposed. Lucifer could apparently hold a grudge – no surprise there – and demons were not made to live quietly.

He was still somewhat surprised at how Crowley decided to occupy himself.

I wanted a burger and a beer.

Too bad, it’s my turn, and a salad and mineral water it is.

Not only was he making him eat rabbit food, he had also chosen a somewhat nicer diner than Dean would have for his lunch break.

But –

No buts, don’t you humans know how to take care of yourselves?

Dean decided it wasn’t worth the fight.

Crowley, when I said I needed to go clothes shopping –

Have you ever even looked in a mirror? And you waste those good looks on denim and flannel.

Dean stared at the shirts Crowley was going through. Are you flirting with me?

Told you you were not mentally deficient.

Yes, he decided, it was definitely better to concentrate on the shirts.

Why are we watching a few dozen idiots giving each other brain damage again?

Because, as you would say, it’s my turn and the Chiefs are playing. Be a good boy and you get to watch cricket when it’s yours.

You should know by now that I am far better at being naughty than nice.

Their conversations had taken on a decidedly flirty tone ever since that shopping trip, but Dean did his best not to notice.

He failed most of the time.

“There’s something different about you, lately” Benny suddenly announced.

Dean looked at him. “What do you mean?”

“Well, that shirt, for one. Looks good on you.”

“And I thought you were happily married –“

“Ha ha. But seriously, brother – you look good. Healthier, even.”

He shrugged. “Changed my diet up a bit.” Crowley would have nagged him forever if he hadn’t now and then eaten a salad voluntarily, now.

Benny frowned. “That’s not all though. But hey, whatever’s working for you – I’m just glad it does.”

Dean could hardly tell him that he had a demonic life coach.

I resent that description.

Sorry, your Highness, would you prefer live-in partner?

For once, Crowley shut up.

After a particularly gruelling day at the shop, Dean sank down in front of his laptop, biting his lip.

Go on. You know you want to.

I am just thinking about it.

Yes. You have been for weeks. Now for God’s sake do something about that!!!

He could have sworn Crowley actually sounded sincere.

And so he tiped Nursing School into the search bar.

“You are going to do what?” Sam asked, blinking.

“I am going to get a nursing certificate. The University of Miami offered me a scholarship. Doesn’t cover everything, but I should get by.”

Sarah was smiling brightly. “That’s wonderful, Dean!”

“I wanted it for a while” he admitted.

“Dean...” Sam hesitated. “If that’s truly what you want, then I’m glad too.”

Ugh. Heartfelt family conversations. How do you humans deal with that?

Mostly by not grunting when they happen.

How mind-numbingly dull.

Crowley –

Fine, fine, I’ll let you have your moment.

Dean was one year into the program, by this time having all but forgotten that sharing his mind with someone wasn’t exactly normal. He now and then had to catch himself, lest he answer to Crowley loudly and freak out someone, but other than that, he was pretty content.

So of course things had to go south.

Crowley had been strangely silent while he did his course work. Not that he didn’t let him do it; but he normally had more to say.

Then –

I have been checking out Hell while you were asleep.

Oh? The devil still on the war path?

No. I think I can return now.

Dean looked up from his papers, not for the first time wishing that he and Crowley could see eye-to-eye. What?

Face it, darling, I’ve done more than my due here, and don’t forget I am the king of the –

Crossroads, yeah, got it, Dean replied, a sinking feeling in his stomach making itself know. Crowley was leaving. Thanks for everything, I guess.

Yes, I – well, I guess that’s it. Bye.

And Crowley was gone.

Dean’s new apartment suddenly felt way too empty.

Five years later

“Ah, Dean.”

“Doctor Mills” he greeted her.

“How’s my favourite nurse?”

“Feeling like I can’t get out of this penguin suit quickly enough” he told her. Give him scrubs any day.

She laughed. “Sorry, you first have to smooch up to the donors. Come on.”

Benefit dinners were not exactly Dean’s idea of a good time, but he could gladly spent a few hours with some rich dude if it meant they got enough money out of it. He loved his job; he was certainly not going to look for a new one if he could help it.

The man Jody had told him was their biggest donor yet was talking to one of their neurosurgeons, but turned around as they approached.

Dean was taken aback. He had never seen the man before in his life, and yet there was something familiar about him, something he couldn’t quite place.

“May I introduce you to our best nurse, Mr. Crowley?” Doctor Mills asked and Dean swallowed, his throat suddenly dry.

It couldn’t be.

He had missed the demon, more than he was ready to admit; for a time, his head had felt so empty and silent, until he had slowly remembered that this was how it was supposed to be; and yet now and then he had wished – he wouldn’t even been able to say what for.

Crowley – stop that, it can’t be him – reached out to shake his hand. “Mr. Winchester.”

That voice. He would have recognized it anywhere. He cleared his throat and reciprocated. “Mr. Crowley.”

“I am very glad to meet you. Doctor Mills has been waxing poetry about you.”

“I am sure she over exaggerated my talents.”

“On the contrary” he said, his eyes sparkling.

When Doctor Mills left them, shooting Dean a glance that clearly indicated she’d picked up on the... tension between them, Crowley said, “Told you. Not mentally deficient at all.”

Good God. “Crowley, what are you doing here?”

“Donating to a hospital. Thought I would try to even things out a bit, you know, karma and all that.”

Dean snorted. “Right. And who’s that poor smug you’re possessing?”

“It’s a John Doe, and he was long gone; only the machines were keeping him alive. It’s just me in here.”

Dean felt strangely relieved, almost as if he had been jealous at the thought of Crowley possessing and constantly talking to someone else. “Not that I’m not glad to see you, but why are you here?”

Crowley grinned, somewhat unsettlingly – although Dean couldn’t deny that it looked attractive, too – “I just wanted to check up on an old investment of mine.”

“An investment, mh?”

“Oh yes. Spent quite a bit of time on that project a few years back, right after my priorities shifted.”

“Oh they did?”

“Yes. And so I decided to leave Hell and build up a worldly fortune for a bit.”

“And what do you think of your old... project?”

“I think it has been doing quite well in my absence.”

“So what now? Another check-in in five years?”

“I was actually thinking about staying here for a while.”

Dean grinned. “You’ll need someone to show you all the places worth seeing around here.”

“You think so?”

There was only one answer to give.

Half an hour later, Dean turned them around so it was Crowley being pressed against the wall of an empty hospital corridor for a change. “By the way” he asked in-between kisses, “How did you find such an attractive meat suit?”

“I’ve been inside of you darling, remember? I knew what to look for.”

Dean threw his head back and laughed, the sound echoing down the hallway.  

[charlie-bradcherry]

MARK PELLEGRINO INTERVIEW: LUCIFER IN S13

Here is the interview or ‘information post’ with Mark Pellegrino that I promised to show you guys because it is pretty interesting to read. I copied and pasted it in this post because Tumblr format is a lot more enjoyable to read for most, and I edited it a bit so it’s more pleasant for the eyes. If you wanna read it on the site, click here.

I bolded the lines that I think are really worth thinking about, that gives us a little bit of insight on Lucifer and spoilers for the upcoming episodes!

Question 1: There’s been a lot of talk in the fandom about an article that you did – I don’t remember who it was with – but it had that quote that you said in this last episode [The Rising Son] about Lucifer being smart and not totally evil. There’s been a lot of talk about Sam’s experience with Lucifer and how badly he was tortured; when Sam and Lucifer do finally meet again in this season, is Sam still going to be so fearful of Lucifer? What are your thoughts on that whole situation?

I imagine that Sam is going to have some PTSD. You don’t spend time in the cage and come out of that experience completely whole. I think he will have some residual feelings about the old Lucifer. The dynamics in the universe have shifted, or are going to shift to a degree that people’s feelings about each other don’t matter so much. When the world was faced with fascism, America and the Soviet Union – sworn enemies ideologically – became allies. So weird things happen when universes shift.

Question 2: (The Interviewer) Lots of people say that they don’t want to see Lucifer’s redemption, if Lucifer has a redemption arc. I said, if we don’t see Lucifer as a fully formed, well, angel in this case, he becomes just a one-dimensional foil for Sam and Dean, and honestly, that’s just boring. As the actor that plays Lucifer, I’m assuming that you prefer the roles where you have more than just a one-dimensional character to play.

I do. You can’t act what isn’t there, but I always try to add different dimensions to a character, that I don’t necessarily see on the page. Redemption of a character like Lucifer – I’m not even sure what it means. Just think about it. Just because I see the mythology of Lucifer in our culture as one massive paradox, you know what I mean? On the one hand, there are these absolutely noble characters that he possesses, and if we saw them in a human being, we would say, “This man is a king of virtue.” His stubbornness, resilience, his insurmountable will and his sense of justice … and the thing that he’s probably put down for most, his sense of pride.

To me, these are virtues. If I saw them in another person, instead of pride as in arrogance but pride as in a sense of justice and a feeling for your own ability to deal with the universe … it’s a different sensibility toward pride than the one that Western culture gives you.

On the one hand, I seem him as the first rebel against authority; whose own personal characteristics drove him to say no. The first to say no. I see him as the being that introduced humanity to its moral sense. The paradox in all of this is that all of these characteristics are seen as sins in a religious world. Instead of rebellion, conformity and obedience are seen as virtues. Instead of an independent mind, and a moral sense, submission is seen as a virtue. Humility instead of pride, so somehow our society adopted – they say whoever wins the war dictates the history. Lucifer lost the war, so the opposition made the history and turned values upside down.

So the guy who actually thinks he’s a figure of virtue, instead of vice, I don’t know what kind of arc that would be … to acknowledge the other side is right and to change from what he is, would mean embracing the opposite of what he stands for. I don’t want that to happen, but I do want healing to happen. I think that the bad parts of Lucifer’s character were bred from – I don’t think they are nature, I think they’re nurture, and this is an argument that was started by Sam. They’re just saying Lucifer is just inheritably bad, whereas Sam wants to apply a different kind of ethics to Jack, but I don’t think Lucifer is inheritably bad … I think his dad even said that. I think isolation from love and alienation from an entire universe, and being painted as the villain from time immemorial, can sour a person.

Just in the five days that I was painted as worse than the devil himself in the eyes of social media were annoying as fucking hell! I can’t imagine going through it for a fucking eternity. And not being pissed off at everybody.

So if you have a sense of pride and dignity, when you’re being attacked like that, it’s going to inspire a vast reprisal. I think Lucifer’s desire for revenge – I used to think that was what motivated him but it seems a little different. I don’t remember if it’s already been filmed or if it’s happening in the future, but Lucifer has a very specific take on creation and on his father. And it’s not what you think. It’s actually kind of interesting. You’re going to see it in a few episodes. (!!!)

Question 3: In this last episode, one of my favourite lines that Lucifer said something like, “You have no idea what I care about.” So what does Luci care about?

I love that line, especially now, because of all the flack and pain that a certain group of people put me through. I see that most of the battles that we fight are fought against straw men. We forget that underneath that straw man we’re hacking to death there is a human being, and the real thing. That’s what I think I meant to her. She knows what she thinks I care about; she’s got her ideas of me. But she doesn’t know me. And I’m not going to tell you what Lucifer cares about; I think it would be revealing spoilers.

That’s a great maxim that we should carry into life, don’t you think? You don’t know me, so stop acting like you do.

Question 4: Do you think there was any correlation between that first opening scene with Lucifer and Mary, in this last episode where Mary’s like you’re going to kill me, and Lucifer’s like no, I’m not, and then at the end when Michael basically has Lucifer by the throat and Michael’s like I need you, I’m going to let you live – do you think there are any correlations between those two situations?

Oh yeah. I think that’s good writing, that’s power reversal right there, and Lucifer being put in Mary’s spot. Lucifer even said something about it in another episode. He’s definitely low man on the totem pole in this universe. What was so funny that he’s the low man on the totem pole in the narrative, which he keeps confronting, “What? This fucking place sucks!” Every time that he’s confronted with the narrative that Lucifer is dead, he’s actually confronted with the fact that he’s not top dog in that world. That’s pretty castrating.

One of the beautiful things that I love about Lucifer is his indomitable will. I don’t care where you find him, he’s still going to go, “Fuck ya. You’re not going to get me. You can tear me apart above the skies of Abilene, like you did to the alternate universe Lucifer, but my middle finger will still be flipping you off as I’m falling down to the ground.” You’ll see that too. You’ll see that Lucifer carries himself with his typical sassy, irreverent demeanor, no matter what horrible situation he finds himself in.

That’s where Lucifer is very different from me. I’m oversensitive, and very affected by the things that people say and do to me … I may not seem that way because you see me probably battling people all the time … but I’m sensitive to the things that they say, and I feel like I don’t want to challenge people to harm me. Lucifer would challenge people to harm him. He pushes the limit all the way to the end and says, “Let’s see how good you are, let’s see how strong you are. Let’s see if your will matches against mine.”

Question 5: At the end of the premiere episode, which really had me bawling – the scene where Sam and Dean and Jack are saying goodbye to Cas, Kelly Kline and Crowley … I don’t know how much you want to talk about Crowley’s demise … but because Crowley has been Lucifer’s nemesis for so long, do you think he actually maybe misses him?

I hope you noticed that when Crowley showed up in the alternate universe, before he was sacrificed, Lucifer did something when he noticed it was Crowley. He kind of wriggled around on the ground and said, “Crowley!” That was sort of a spontaneous thing that happened in the moment … I think Lucifer’s character being what it is … he admires men and women without limits. He admires cleverness and intelligence and will. Crowley demonstrated the ability to outsmart him. He liked it … he liked the challenge … the challenge now of fighting this formidable being … like any great boxer is going to be defined by his opposition. Ali wasn’t Ali until he met Foreman and Frazier. And that’s what made him a champion.

The same with Lucifer … I think he would see things in the terms of bring me your biggest challenge and I’ll meet it. I think he would miss Crowley to be honest. Especially with this new guy Asmodeus coming up. That guy’s a real piece of work. I think he’s a lot worse and a lot more powerful than Crowley. Crowley was sort of an ambitious CEO … sort of a ruthless CEO, there was something about his intelligence that I admire. I don’t think that’s the same with Asmodeus, he’s a tyrant.

So in answer to that, I think yes, I think Lucifer would miss Crowley.

Question 6: The season premiere really hit me, at the end when Sam is talking to Jack and explaining how you say goodbye to someone who has passed. Sam’s line – and Jared’s delivery of that line – was exactly what I needed to hear at exactly the right time. And that’s one of the reasons why I love Supernatural … it seems to have the timing of picking up on stuff that is the perfect timing for a lot of things. I know that’s the way it is for a lot of people as well.

I thought that was an interesting for Sam to say as well. I thought it was a great summation of the process of understanding death for the living. Here’s what I love about Supernatural – we all know that the story is about family … but it’s about orphans. It’s about people who’ve had to become their own guide in a crazy universe, and only had each other to rely on. That’s pretty powerful … so many of us come from broken homes, where we miss one parent or there are other abusive family relationships … if you come to the world fractured and you have to survive by your own wits. Being in a show like this, even as fantastical as it is … it’s possible to defy even a whole universe and be right. To be treated like they were, but still find love and loyalty … the family don’t end in blood thing is all about that. I think that’s why so many people find solidarity in the show itself.

Any opinions on this interview?

[elizabethrobertajones]

13x03 watching notes

The Saga Of Dean’s Fluctuating Grief Scruff

Berens has made me cry exponentially more in each of his episodes for a while. At this rate I will cry 6-9 times in this episode, so I really hope we break the streak.

I'm so pumped for this episode.

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Hahaha me 10 seconds ago: fuk u berens don't make me cry

recap: how about we paste "goodbye Cas" over the shot of Dean kneeling by dead Cas?

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I have returned with my stuffed toy umbreon "taako from eevee" and I have hugs

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OH NO Jack recap, pasting Lucifer over him in awful flashes and trying to sell his dark side even though he is a squishy.

WELP they're going right there with the Sam drinking blood parallel with Dean saying when has anything ever gone right for us. Is Jack going to Fuck Up today? Or is that just emotional backstory?

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Awww Missouri's BFF. I love her already.

I guess this guy is the wraith. I think I remember him from the promos.

Hey, here's the tarot cards. They're for the MotW

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The wraith was in the mirror that's behind them but it didn't show his face all wraith-y. Pfft.

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Uhoh, Dean's music is different... Brb need to get a Mittens on the line.

The only word I caught was wall and then we cut to no music and Jack marvelling at the brickwork.

Okay, Mittens told me the song and I looked it up and yeah it's the Rolling Stones and completely romantically neutral.

This is the bit we got:

Mama says yes, Papa says no, Make up you mind 'cause I gotta go. Gonna raise hell at the Union Hall, Drive myself right over the wall.

I almost think it was chosen just because Jack was pawing at the wall.

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Jack being fascinated with the bricks in both 13x01 when Sam was ASKING him about the portals between universes, and now when he's just pawing at the bricks reeeally makes me feel like Jack has a fascination with the brick and mortar pattern, like these lines between the solid planes are somehow tickling at whatever deep down cosmic part of himself knows about the portals. If he's still figuring it out or something.

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Oh no here's the awful promo that nearly made me cry last night.

I am so sad that Jack's been hiding in his room.

It is adorable how he looks at the data stick, like, getting it's important but totally baffled about HOW and what to DO with it. Sam's starting to take for granted that Jack is a bit more... well, together, than he actually is. The real question is does Sam know he was stabbing himself?  That's such a hard thing for Dean to tell Sam, and not betray empathy to Jack - unless he grumpily delivers the news and legs it :P

But yeah, anyway. Sam expecting Jack to be able to do things he can't, maybe starting to take Jack's fast learning for granted when it comes to how he's managed to adapt to burgers and reading and stuff. He's still a 4-5 day old person, and he's never done this before... Sam hands him the USB stick without even stopping to think at first that Jack might not be capable of using it...

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*stares at Sam staring at Jack* I think he's feeling deeply sympathetic - I reblogged some meta about how they have a shared experience here but Jack's getting so much more than Sam ever did. Ironically, I was gonna make a parallel to Home, without stopping to think that Missouri is here but let's call it a real meta parallel then - Mary saying even 3 words to Sam in Home was the most Sam had ever seen of her in his entire life and the most words he could remember her saying to him, ever. Of course Mary and Kelly were/are paralleled as mothers, and Kelly to Jack will be a much more pure image because she never did anything dark or made any deals - he's born because she had no idea she was sleeping with Lucifer, so even though Mary was put in an AWFUL place she made the deal with enough accountability she is held responsible for it, and FEELS responsible for it. Since Jack's powers are already being textually paralleled to Sam and his demon blood I think this is an interesting thing to put a pin in.

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MIIIISSOURI HELLO

She sounds and looks almost exactly the same. It's been THIRTEEN YEARS what the hell

She looked older in 1x09

maybe it's just the different colour schemes and lighting these days :P

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Oh no and we're back to Kelly

Her words are so important in a kind of free will exposition way. She's so proud of him!!!

"YOU HAVE AN ANGEL WATCHING OVER YOU"

I know I sobbed about that in 12x23 a bit but just... the reminder, right now. In this episode where we have been teased that Cas is going to be around again (I miss him so much)... I think it's interesting because Kelly tells Jack that no one can tell him who he can be (which I think may be a problem long term that Sam is interested in moulding him so even TFW aren't a completely safe bet to hang out with for Jack to gain a sense of personhood - he'll have to fly the nest eventually) but then she reminds Jack that an angel is watching over him. Obviously she is a Good Person in the show's narrative, and angels in her perspective are good (because Cas was kind to her) and Cas specifically is AWESOME and this is the reminder that Cas is Jack's father now apparently and all... but it's also setting him aside in a way. I think perhaps Jack needs to come to terms with what Cas is that isn't exactly his FATHER per se but also isn't just the angel on his shoulder, in the exact same way Dean needs to realise Cas isn't his BROTHER per se but also not just the angel on his shoulder. It's that grey area. In Jack's case, it's because a reckoning with Lucifer and understanding the potential darkness in him, or his legacy as being Lucifer's son, can't be ignored. Cas can't be pasted on top of it for his deep down personal understanding, and Kelly mentions the father and Castiel as separate entities. The father doesn't define what Jack is... Cas has a more neutral position, a guiding one... But I think some wires may be crossed with Jack, too, that has given Cas absolute fatherhood in such a way that it's going to be GREAT for Jack to set his moral compass by such a well-meaning good character who seems to want the best for Jack, but it can't be his entire understanding of himself.

...

Sorry for just throwing a Destiel parallel into all that but it fascinates me that tbh Sam is like the only one who doesn't have a complicated relationship with Cas. I guess also Mary got to grips with him around 12x09, but then also didn't have a whole bunch of contact with him... On the other hand in my Christmas fic I haven't even got the remotest idea what it will be about yet but will feature all the current living characters in a fluffy Christmas scenario, I'm pretty much ready for Cas and Mary to be the chillest friends :P

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LOL Sam and Dean talking about how long since they saw Missouri "what has it been a decade?" "MORE" Yeah you FUCKS she said to stay in touch. DON'T BE STRANGERS.

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That is a cold sweat moment for Dean, like... fuck I haven't ever even sent her a CHRISTMAS CARD

Maybe he sees her name in John's journal sometimes and does send her one.

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Awww and Sam was talking to Jody off-screen, which I love because that is my JAM

*badum tish*

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Dean is alarmed that Sam handed off the case to her, because he wanted to leave the freaking house and get awaaay from Jack

He's not that concerned about Jody.

I mean, rationally, he knows Jody is the Toughest Cookie they've ever met. She went up against Leviathan WITH AN APPENDECTOMY

But in the immediate here and now? He is PISSED that Sam wants to keep them sequestered away in the Bunker with the one thing he can hardly bear to co-exist with in the same universe.

His stomping off is an End Of moment... Reminded of 9x06 because Berens, but also because in the start of that episode Dean takes the lead from Cas and legs it from researching with Sam and Kevin, and it's like a horrible reverse motivation. Cas is dead and he can't bear to be around that horror and guilt and confusion. He needs the distraction, so off he goes on a solo case, leaving Sam behind. His angry "you got me" when he skips out on research and Kevin thinks he has it all sussed out why Dean is leaving is again a reverse of Dean's self-professed anger at the situation when he knows that Jody will be FINE and of course she's part of their competent hunter network who can handle things probably a hell of a lot better than them, being an actual cop and all. But it makes one hell of an excuse to go. And Dean was in a pissy mood then as well but it was his own fuck up about Gadreel bothering him and his guilt about what he'd done to Cas. So external motivators help him leave. This time it's all internal motivators where he WANTS to leave. So he makes it all happen by getting irrationally angry at Sam.

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CORN FIELD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

I know it was most likely just There but hey we have a Turducken slammer poster in the background and corn syrup blah blah, and corn = Cain

Theeeemes, as Mittens says.

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JODY JODY JODY

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Missouri drops some heeeavy hints about not having family around any more.

She always did love that car. A reminder she's known them basically their entire lives, since The Fire, and she knew the car as both John and Dean's.

Also a handy way to make her a trusted ally and as Mittens says, the car is Dean's soul and Missouri has seen inside him.

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HE JUST WANTS HUGS

He heard Missouri and Jody were in the same place and was like FUCK YOU SAM I AM GOING TO COLLECT MY HUGS

But seriously even if he's kinda putting it all on a bit because he's miserable, these people are genuinely cheering him up just to see and he's getting physical comfort from two parental figures to him.

(he's so weird about Jody being a mom figure)

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LOL Missouri did the thing

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The thing literally every single person said they wanted her to do

he should have hugged Jody first

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Is it just me or did she hesitate on "loss" and then add the "es" after a moment of uncertainty? Please tell me one is not drowning out the other I will die.

Although of course, Missouri is a HUGE reminder of the Mary stuff because she comes connected to their home and Dean is having to re-re-confront that and OF COURSE he does it when he's lost Mary AGAIN. And pfft I spent yesterday writing about Jody re-losing her son in 5x15 and having the problem of fresh loss after getting someone back you didn't think you'd ever HAVE back.

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I love that we're seeing Missouri's process. She's reaaally spelling out the exposition. But in this case I can trust that that's just because the actual method and knowing that it's a wraith and his MO is just a random detail to all the more important emotional stuff. That this is just some necessary building blocks to get to the good stuff and this is the fastest way to get us there.

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Sam immediately starts getting into choppy water and I'm one line into the next scene. He's bringing up training Jack... Sam, we've spent the last 2 weeks talking about how it's not a great idea for you to try and harness him for your own reasons because it will make you look bad to him. Jack needs to trust you!

I'm worried he'll end up thinking that Sam giving him the connection with his mom was just a way to soften him up a bit more to Sam. Like yeah on the surface level it's lovely and shows Sam has been careful and paid attention and collected all the evidence from the house to check if anything will be important for Jack (not the 100s of diapers)... And then found this thing and immediately decided Jack should have it because it would mean so much to him. it's great that he cares so much he did this!!

But yeah putting the scenes back to back is a little uncomfortable because Sam does have motives, and like I said last time out, if Sam HADN'T just lost Mary through a rift Nougat unknowingly opened, he would 100% definitely treat Jack with the exact same care because he is a sweet guy.

But looks bad.

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Sam is waving a pencil. He looks like a lecturer.

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This is a different part of the Bunker or the library from an angle we never see and this is a new table with a different lamp and I am so horrified, as the Table Meta person, to have a bunch of new stuff to work out and write about :P

This is the Yoda Table for the time being

I suppose it's a new place for a fresh start and, like, virgin territory for meta meaning. Whether it's the store room or the library the important thing is it's DIFFERENT and it's a sort of secluded corner than right out in the middle of the war room or something. It's a sort of private nook kind of feeling. Sam is trying to make a comfortable environment for Jack.

Jack glances at Sam.

Thing is, Asmodeus got him to open a portal to hell by cajoling him, and Sam's asking him to get control of basic things like moving a pencil around. It SEEMS safe and like a good exercise to try and get to grips with his powers and learn finesse and control, and for Jack's sake too. But... Idk, still looks dodgy Sam. I mean I can absolutely and 100% see a surface level where this is adorable and great and Sam has a new friend/nephew, and for the time being I'm enjoying it as it is. But I have this worried feeling that Sam is not going to help Jack emotionally, even if this works in the short term, because Jack has room to be suspicious of what Sam wants, and even if Sam doesn't ask for a while, he has a motivation for Jack to learn to control his powers beyond JUST wanting to help him. I think their dynamic is great and fascinating, but I am worried that from Jack's perspective he won't get the nuance of Sam - Sam needs to open up to him for one thing about his own fuck ups and what Azazel - another yellow eyed demon - did to him.

And Jack glancing at Sam who is watching him so intently is the tension here - can Jack trust Sam when Sam may be just as interested in Jack as Asmodeus was? How can a 5 day old TELL?

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James has a super nice house.

Also Missouri is "not supposed to call" but they used a recent calls screen on her phone instead of a contacts list, and James was on it, which means that she HAS been in contact with him recently, and therefore prop department messed it up. The CGI in this episode has made 2 errors already >.>

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OH NO JAMES DOESN'T BELIEVE

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"it's coming for you and pa-" nooo

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WHERE IS PATIENCE

I wanna see her on screeeeeeeeeeeeen

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WHAT DID MISSOURI DO TO JAMES?

She was a John parallel in 1x09 and allied with him and withholding epic amounts of plot info that only she knew what could have been everything up to and including end of season 2 reveal stuff. Her powers make her kind of a disaster friend tbh. Like, great at a party but if you don't believe your mother has visions and is, idk, hysterical or something, then OH BOY that makes for some family trauma. We'll see how this shakes out but right now James at least is successful and rich and has nooothing to do with his mother even though he may potentially be psychic and repressed about it himself, since the wraith will be coming for him and Patience, and we know SHE is.

I kinda don't wanna make a parallel where she's the bad parent and fucked up her son who has repressed his powers because oh boy he's got like a Dean Smith level apartment and this is a can of worms I can't be bothered to delve into when Patience might be on screen soon.

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Dean "yes ma'am"'d Missouri because everything is awful, because he'd "yes sir" John and oh god. Ow.

Jody is watching like "what the hell sort of dynamic have I missed here?"

She has been taking notes on these boys for years and she still doesn't know anything about them. I was thinking the other day watching 5x15 that when she meets them they're in Fed get up and they bluster at her like they're the authorities when she first challenges them, until she calls Bobby and sees through it and calls their crap. But something something defensive retreat into surface level clam shell around Jody, re: she had no idea Dean went to Purgatory, was a demon, or that Mary had come back to life, just for STARTERS.

I wonder if Missouri commenting on the car was a tie back to John as well specifically in her alignment. This season is all about fathers and without an actual John for Dean to deal with, bringing Missouri back as a John figure... eep

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Meanwhile Jack is still squinting at a pencil and calling himself useless, so I think Sam is about to climb on his back and make him run through a swamp while beating him with a stick

(dear god I hope every single one of you has watched Empire Strikes Back)

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Jack's catchphrase is "I don't -" he just doesn't understand. He doesn't KNOW.

Asmodeus was "in his head"

Holy shit and then Sam suggests Jack try that and Jack snaps back at him because HOLY SHIT SAM CAN YOU HEAR HOW BAD THIS SOUNDS?

You really can't, because you think you are doing a good thing but USB STICK, SAM. USB STICK.

Asmodeus was a master manipulator who made Jack want to do a thing so badly and used all the right words to make him do exactly what he wanted. Sam is nice enough not to brainwash Jack like see the pencil, be the pencil dramatics... But asking Jack to remember one of his many traumatic experiences? Noooo don't do it.

This is a very bad plan, Sam.

Anyway also Jack confirms how Asmodeus manipulated him and shows his innocence and also his feelings on what happened - how horrible it was for him to go through it, and, well, he was 3 days old and he got tricked and he has no emotional touchstones to handle this sort of thing :(

And Sam is just being way too rigorous - we take a break, he gets some food, then he'll come back and we try again? Nooo Sam.

(btw I have to say I have been saying over and over that Berens writes my favourite Sam, and this is indeed Berens making Sam absolutely fascinating, although I have to repeat, as a totally flawed and messed up person. No one was ever there for Sam to guide him through what he could do. He didn't even know how he moved that wardrobe the one time he did telekinesis... He's completely lost and trying to handle this alone and with a lot to prove because Dean's snapped at him and stormed off, and he wants Mary back... He's being like Dean - angry and taking it out on Jack - but in Sam's chill, deep under the surface way, and of course like Dean can spare smiles and hugs for Jody and Missouri, he still can have a kind and well-meaning surface layer just like Dean can have a happy one. But bring on the frustration and he slips and says the wrong things and now he's acting like a strict teacher....)

Jack's face that was cast to be both perfectly scowly and perfectly cute is now being used to be very scary and scowly.

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OH NO MISSOURI!!!

She was badass and defiant to the end but it's still sad and we knew it was coming because, well... I swear there was spoiler chatter that Patience and Missouri would meet, but I suppose it's more like Patience is going to find out about her grandma and have to learn about her that way...

I mean the whole point of Wayward Sisters so far has been Jody collecting orphaned girls and she has a living father and until this point Missouri, so she has to end up in a way where Jody is now the only guiding light she has

but bleeeeeeeh.

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ANYWAY like passing the baton, we get the last scene of Missouri (making a stand) and move to Patience.

HELLO NEW MAIN CHARACTER

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She's a neeeerd

I love her

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She is good at volleyball because she's psychic

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heee wonder woman comparison. Blah blah meta from when Dean owned being wonder woman.

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Her athletic friend looks nerdy and she describes her as being a bookworm athlete because Patience looks cool and athletic (she's very tall or her friend is short...) so there's 2 false binaries here: the nerd and athlete one where you can only be one or another. Her friend with the massive glasses and fringe (bangs?) is nerd-coded. And Patience carrying around her files but secretly being good at sports is the direct opposite... I like this imagery, no prizes for guessing where else I apply it :P

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All the lights are flickering... It would be hilarious if SHE was causing it, just because monsters don't do that...

I think she is having a vision.

OH it was a dream, cool. (We're really expanding what psychics can do all of a sudden, because we're about to send 2 of them off into Wayward Sisters. If Kaia and Patience can hang out in dreams, that would be AWESOME. I bet visiting Patience's dream landscape once she has her powers under control would be amazing, if 8x08 and Fred's inner mind is anything to go off of :P)

Also OH NO poor Missouri. She's used her death as an omen for Patience, like, basically just because her father won't talk to her. I mean talk about spite, she's right in the John Winchester model of family, like, well guess I'll just DIE then, and get Patience to deal with this for me :P

Getting back to those flashing lights, also, even though it was just a dream, I do think it was interesting because Jack blew all those lights. I think it's a sign of losing control as much as a display of power - if we go from 4x01 and Cas doing it, it was just because raw power on display. In 13x01 for Jack it's both that and loss of control. For Patience it's the sign of the supernatural creeping up on her but also she loses control of her dream environment and Missouri invades it to send her the warning...

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James has something on his screen about crude oil. He's probably like a stocks and shares guy or something. This house is ridiculous. Patience is going to be the rich kid on the team, and probably adjusting to the gross gritty life of being a hunter :P

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Ooh she did recognise Missouri - so the contact wasn't broken off THAT long ago.... I say remembering how I thought she hadn't changed at all since season 1 :P

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James doesn't give anything away about her phoning like, yesterday. He looks baaad about it.

Don't lie to kids about their powers and heritage...

I say side-eyeing Sam for not getting into the exact thing with Lucifer I was blah-ing on about at the top of this episode. Which is probably not helping Jack understand and control his powers

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Oh noooo Dean at a Gas n Sip

hearing about the murder on the TV OH NO

I got to ask why it's night at the fortune teller's and day where Dean is.

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Singer directed this and I'm up to 3 boo boos of the wraith not being in the mirror, the phone breaking the story, and the wrong time of day in the footage on TV so I'm just gonna side eye and move on. Maybe he's having an off week when he made this or something because when he's not directing Eugenie's scripts he's normally competent.

-

Knock Knock hello James

Wait, Dean has got massively more scruffy between scenes.

HE HAS - I WENT BACK AND LOOKED

Is this a continuity about them driving all night?

I am loving the look. Gimme more of the season 9 look Dean.

-

They are kinda treating James like he knows and cares about monsters, when really he's a stock guy with a fancy house. Wrong approach, but telling the absolute truth. Dean, again, not sugar coating it. Jody has to step in and help with comforting sounding words about the truth. She, also, doesn't even mention she's a cop and is acting very much as Dean's partner on the hunt rather than a cop.

-

Patieeence. At school with her friend, who is badgering her about hot boys. Patience relucantly says okay fine he's hot. *wonders exactly how gay she is* Probably not with a huuuge crush on her friend but we'll see :P No one can be that "ugh" about the entire concept.

-

Patiiiience. She's been ACTIVATED.

-

The fact she had a couple of pencils sticking out of something in her locker just makes me think that over on the other side of the story Sam is trying to activate Jack's powers via a pencil.

-

AAAH

HAHAHAHA She's awesome!!!

And she snaps the gross wraith spike off with like 0% of the fuss Dean made.

-

I LOVE the shot of Dean rushing down the stairs to follow the wraith... I also love that Jody is now united with Patience, and she's gonna glom onto her and drag her into her spiiiiin offffffffff

-

After all the fuss I'm making that better get picked up or I'm rioting.

-

Dean nearly gets hit by a blue van - hey, monsters in blue vans? 8x18, that time when Dean was like "what, my feelings????" when Sam asked him how he was, and then there was that creepy Metatron sweater dude being a terrible stand-in father for Krissy in like the dark timeline version of what Wayward Sisters is promising to become.

-

Bah Dean shaved again... Get the continuity together!!

-

Ohh no Patience thinks Missouri doesn't caaare... She ditched her after her mom died? heeeey-o John parallels where he emotionally ditched them after Mary died. Only this leads to Patience growing up with no idea about her powers... Except she has been unnerved enough by her deja vu to sound like she's researched it on wikipedia and reassured herself that hey this happens to everyone...

Well if she's not queer she's certainly having one hell of a metaphor journey :P

-

HOLY SHIT SAM. He put Jack in that table because there's a SECRET CAMERA

you know what Sam has done? Once he knew the BMOL put cameras in the bunker, he's gone and found their wifi and he's got into it with undefined magic hacking powers they all have and he's using Ketch's surveillance for his own purposes now.

Look. You mean well. You're reading the sort of parenting book for psychic kids you never had yourself (love it) but this is creepy! You shouldn't be spying on Jack!!!!

Sam has boundary issues with his magic nephew, more news at 10

-

I know I know  he's just concerned and worried and wants to do the right thing but he's not got any frame of reference for how to emotionally nurture someone. It's a MIRACLE and testament to his nature that he's come out anything like as sweet as he did. But oh boy this is bad. You can't just come running in yelling because Jack moved out of sight because now Sam has betrayed that he was watching Jack or WHY WOULD HE COME RUNNING IN IN SUCH A PANIC?

-

Jack's starting to sound done with everything and I love my Nougat child who likes sitting in dark corners.

-

He's not sitting cross-legged this time, it's much more like how Sam found him in 12x23

-

I think Jack seeks out dark shadowy places to lurk

-

His voice has literally changed to be more gravelly

-

OH NO JACK NOOOOOOOOO

HOW DARE YOU THINK YOU'RE EVIL, YOU PRECIOUS CHILD

-

But Dean thinks he'll be evil and Sam has surveillance set up on him...

-

Oh dear god let this be the Berens Speech of the episode that makes me weep openly

-

OH NO NOUGAT

-

He's got all his comparisons to live up to but he doesn't have his angel watching over him!!!

I said earlier that's a bad comparison for Jack to treat him as his father AND that phrase needs to be hauled out and torn to shreds, but I think some short term guardian angeling will probably be good for Jack and maybe even Cas depending on how he feels when he gets back... I almost trust this season to treat that relationship slowly and carefully since they're being so absolutely on the nose with character development stuff being spelled out.

-

Sam's doing the "listen" thing and sitting down... Can you get to Jack?

SAY THE THING

Oh gosh he apologised for pressuring Jack

I didn't think that would work

I should yell at the screen more

-

HE WANTS TO FIND A BETTER WAY

AND THEN HE TOOK JACK'S HAND AND HAULED HIM TO HIS FEET

-

OH YEAH HERE IT IS "I know what it feels like -" THAT WAS PART 2 OF "SAY THE THING"

-

AHAHA STOP MAKING SAM CRY, BERENS, YOU MONSTER

-

It makes me cry

-

"Dean, Cas - my family helped me through" NOOOOOOOOOOOOPE FUCK OFF BERENS

"you're not evil, Jack" THANKS SAM, THOUGH

-

Meanwhile: Jody and Dean awkwardly stand next to each other while Patience has a Family Moment.

Dean's connection to Missouri goes so far back that Patience has to mean something to him in the sense that omg this is Missouri's family... However she treated Dean (and kinda scared him i think :P) he has an investment in them because Missouri was there at a bloody awful time for him, and she was helpful and good to them (and he has no idea she was lying about John the whole time - tbh the fact that she can see stuff that happened in a scene pretty much just confirms to me that what we DIDN'T see was that the first time John met her he took her to the nursery and BAM she sees the scene from 2x21 that Azazel showed Sam of the demon blood and she's like... ah.)

(pls refer to my pre-wayward sisters watching notes for actual thoughts on that :P I got super rambly and i'm not going over it AGAIN)

-

OH NO James grew up having total faith in her powers and then she said what James wanted to hear and told him the better news either making a mistake or doing EXACTLY WHAT WE SAW HER DO in her introductory seconds... Temporary help to alleviate pain but in the end - well, that guy's wife was still banging the gardener whether he knew it or not and one way or another he might find out...)

UGH Missouri what did you do.

-

OH NO JAMES HAS DEAN'S BACKSTORY OF HIS PARENT ON THE ROAD HUNTING MONSTERS

Remember when I said I hated the Dean Smith life he made for himself? I HATE IT SO MUCH

-

I went to vent at Mittens about this and she told me she has been comparing Patience to Kev and James to Linda and that's another extremely awful way to look at all this :D

-

"I didn't want that life for you" I think it's interesting that James managed to put it all behind him SO effectively, especially if he's somewhat psychic himself (I BET IT HELPS WITH TRADING SHARES, IF IT HELPS WITH VOLLEYBALL. JUST SAYING)... He's basically done what both John and Mary repeatedly said especially in the context of Sam and just letting him go to school and live a life. Patience has got that - so far - but lo and behold it all catches up.

-

Aaaand James chooses to run again.

Like, it sucks, but "use her as bait and kill the wraith" is generally the better tactic when it comes to just confronting your problems. And the horror genre is ALWAYS about confronting those inner problems. In this case the wraith going specifically after the psychics in the family is blatantly a metaphor for this catching up and James no longer being able to pretend this isn't what his family is all about. I would say it's targeted at his decisions and Patience's awakening - a vision is one thing, an attack BECAUSE she had it seals the deal and makes it impossible to ignore.

And if James runs again, he only puts the problem behind them, to try and live normally but... Patience has already been changed by this encounter and Missouri's awakening.

-

Awwwwwwww nooooooooo flashback.

She's so SMOL.

This is all the perfect sort of emotional manipulation to get me completely attached to her.

-

I'm trying not to meta too much between The Man Pain and Patience's story (she's the POV character of WS I think? I mean I desperately want her to be, as the new character to the dynamic aside from Kaia who's being introduced later as a part of Claire's story - and I think I saw one comment somewhere in the PR and completely latched onto it) but there is something about James saying that Missouri's influence is poison and Patience learning to be psychic is something he desperately wants to avoid, and the parallel story with Jack also discovering his powers. Patience thankfully only seems to have Sam-like visions and will probably have Missouri's skill set (i mean sheesh this might not be a memory but a vision but in this case it's almost impossible to tell apart for Patience except that maybe this is literally the clarity of what she's remembering on screen :P) - I think it works better in the present day, that the adults are all here to weigh in on what Patience can be.

I think Missouri appearing in flashes mirrors Kelly to Jack, since he's not getting anything from Cas at the moment, so she's the beacon of someone who truly believes in Patience, and there was a sort of powers birth transfer awakening thing in the way Missouri dies and Patience gets her first strong vision that she can't shake off as deja vu.

-

Dean said that Missouri reads objects so Patience is probably getting this vision off the brooch, tbh.

-

This hazy memory is probably actually circa like... season 2 or something, if Patience is supposed to be school aged NOW and the show is THIRTEEN YEARS OLD so if she's like... 5... that's season 1 or 2, if she's roughly supposed to be 18

I am not good at maths btw feel free to call this out

-

That kid REALLY looks like young Patience, in that creepy SPN casting directors way

-

OH GOSH the vision parallels not just to Kelly but Missouri will always look out for her, and that's very much like Angels Are Watching Over You

-

AAAAAH HE GRABBED PATIENCE

put it back.jpg

-

Is James going to use his own secrit powers he's been repressing the entire time and find her?

-

HE'S GONNA USE HIS PSYCHIC POWERS TO FIND PATIENCE

Bless this entire metaphor of repression being overcome and accessing the true parts of yourself.

-

Is this the same creepy set that Cas once stabbed a demon in that time when he was looking for something or other? I can't even remember if that was season 10 or 11 or what he was looking for, but a gif of him wandering around doing The Eyebrow is common enough on my dash I don't forget that it happened :P

-

Oh great he basically has super wraith powers because he drinks people with super powers.

Stupid creepy wraith

Leave her alone!!!!!!!!!

LOL

"first: gross" I love her.

-

NOOOOO JAMES

You were just starting to be cool

-

Wait is she having a vision, because Jody should probably not be dead right now if she has a spin off to be playing around in:P

I bet Dean's about to killed too

Yep

owie, that was embarrassing for him

He's super off his game if he lets himself get killed THAT EASILY

-

This was super metaphoric on so many levels though - once I know what happens with James I should get back to that, but Jody symbolically being killed and she's moving on to another property with her flock of girls, and DEAN, getting symbolically super killed like stabby stabby stabby, make it look good for the next time they have to recap how often they all die on this show.. :P But yeah, even just showing him dying is fascinating, especially with the context of how he's feeling.

And oh no Mittens pointed out he's not just off his game but if he saw Jody being dead, that's all his worst fears, and ANOTHER dead friend on his hands, and he did specifically come here to protect her, in his words. :<

-

I love the 2nd version of this. The new fight coordinator guy is really showing off. I type in the instant Dean grabs the rope because improvised weapons are a thing now :P

-

I should probably dig up that meta about veils between worlds because even if Dean didn't die he just got shoved through like 100 hanging sheets and that is ridiculously symbolic.

-

Nice one, Dean.

LOL his face. "welp, killed that guy"

I feel like there was a Moment there. Like maybe he thought hunting would make him feel something but -

oh no

-

HE'S SCRUFFY AGAIN

I feel attacked by the bad continuity but the fact that the bad continuity is because Dean's apparently due some grief scruff

-

"You handled that wraith! Guess you still got it!!"

*dean pauses* *stares into the nihilistic dark void consuming his soul*

"guess so"

I hate this

-

PATIENCE

Snuggly hoodie is snuggly. I wanna hug her

-

"Thank you, for everything" that phraaase nooo

-

James thinks she should put her gift away and get back to normal... But she has a spin off to go to.

-

NOO DEAN DO NOT DO A IN THIS LIFE SPEECH

I HAAATE THIS

-

elizabethrobertajones WHAT THE FUCK HE'S SCRUFFY AGAIN I'm phoning the continuity guy how do I find his number Dean's scruff has been coming and going all episode :P

mittensmorgul wait where are you?

elizabethrobertajones Dean's broken pls help him this must be the scene they wanted the scruff for and he showed up on day 1 of filming clean shaven and they were like... Jensen... no

mittensmorgul HAHAHA

elizabethrobertajones Dean's gotta talk about how everything sucks and he wants to just go live on the beach in a house made of sticks and you need at least 5mm of scruff for that speech

mittensmorgul oh no...

-

Anyway Dean and James agree - Patience should go live in her house and they should exploit their skills only for shares and volleyball. Dean is utterly, utterly defeated and he hates the job and it's the worst and everyone you love will die and you just have to kill monsters all day and it's not even FUN...

-

please help him

-

YAY JODY

"you don't have to listen to him" because guess who is NOT THE BOSS OF US ON THE WAYWARD SISTERS SHOW?

That's right, The Man Pain(TM)

Jody you absolute beacon of sunshine and love and accepting yourself. She can see Dean's broken and spoke out of turn to what Patience might need in his own grief (and I think that must parallel to Sam's treatment of Jack somewhat although thankfully they resolved it back to a functioning relationship already) so she offers her an alternative.

OH NO and she refers to Claire as a sort of daughter

haaalp

And she's so sad she couldn't keep Claire safe against her nature to be a hunter.

And Jody OBLITERATES repression completely. Go be gay with the Wayward Sisters. :D

"You try to force it down to make someone else happy, you will only make yourself miserable"

I love you Berens.

-

And Jody recruits another avenger :D

-

*glares at my tables tag* Sam is sitting alone in the dark at the war room table, exactly like the end of 9x06. Sometimes being right about the sneaky imagery the show uses feels so pointless because, well, I'm right, but to what purpose does this serve? The tables tag will never bring me glory in battle :P

-

Mittens just warned me to squish Taako for the rest of this scene so I'm in hug mode.

-

"How's the kid, did he go darkside yet?" "nooope."

I mean I'm using Sam's line as a reaction gif forever but OW.

Is Sam gonna call Dean out on what he's been saying about Jack? I scared.

"He's messed up because of you"

... uuh. Again. I'm gonna stop asking Berens for the next line of dialogue because i feel like I'm in that gameshow where they are trying to finish a phrase and I'm just asking for all the right letters while thinking I know what the phrase is and I am scared about what that phrase is.

-

And Sam is playing with the rings on the table, which Lucifer once did, and Sam did a few times in season 12 when things were HAIRY.

He fidgets when he is upset with his family.

-

"You think you can USE this freak"

I'm SHAKING. DEAN, NO. STOP TALKING IMMMMMMEDIATELY RIGHT NOW.

I stand by that Sam has a dodgy approach to Jack but fuck that entire concept that Dean just aired, we're getting into Open Warfare in the fandom between the Sam n Dean factions, I can tell. Like... the only question is is this going to be worse than Sam Hit A Dog or In The Same Situation I Wouldn't, or both on top of each other?

-

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO JACK IS THERE

-

Dean is wearing a black henley and Jack is wearing a white one I HATE IT

-

"I didn't end bad" OH WE ARE GOING THERE

WE ARE SO GOING THERE

Sam's been going there since Dean said "freak" because i have recently rewatched enough of season 1-4 to screeech when Dean said it.

-

And here's the season 2 thing back again

-

OH SHIT

Dean no

NO.

He's saying ALL THE THINGS AND HE SHOULD NOT BE SAYING THEEEEM

(I mean... healthy communication and the truth? But like... not doing it at top volume in front of the kid??)

NO THE CAS THING

THIS IS THE SAME FACE AS 9x22 WHEN DEAN SAID IT WAS A DICTATORSHIP

-

CAAAASSSSSS

-

HI BABE

Wakey wakey

-

Okay I had to go to dinner and I took my laptop down and made my mum extremely sad

I noticed a couple of other things on the next pass through, mostly sneaky dialogue repeats that I can't remember

but pass 2 through that last argument anyway because I was rushing it

-

Oh teardrops in the bead curtain at Dede's place, because grief. More passing through veils too.

The 9x06 parallel because Sam has a pencil for Jack, and it's a different room in the Bunker but weird shades of them keeping Crowley there, at least on the negative side of how they're treating Jack. Not a true parallel - different room and they're not asking him to write anything down, and Jack is doubling as Kevin.

Thinking of doubles - Patience framed as having 2 consciences about whether she becomes a wayward sister or not in Dean vs Jody - very much like Jack having dual father issues. Jody says "don't listen to him" for the negative example and wafts it away with love and she's gonna keep Patience :3

Also I thought of like 18 more reasons why I love Patience while I was watching

-

So, 3rd pass through this argument... WHY AM I DOING THIS TO MYSELF

Sam confronting Dean is again something where the episode establishes a mixed sort of approach but overall he has a GOOD approach to Jack and the best he's getting at the moment. Dean calling out Sam for using Jack THAT loudly and angrily instead of gently critiquing his methods and asking Sam if he'd care if Jack couldn't get Mary back - that's something Jack can't overhear right now but super needs to.

Of course, Dean is the Worst Parent but he hasn't signed up for that role. He still has an influence over Jack and is too super pissed off to see Jack - and Jack is behind a wall, which takes us to Berens and 12x22 and the wall between Dean and Mary. Dean can't see Jack for what he is and that means he's saying all the wrong things and not even able to reach out to parent him.

Jack basically wakes Cas up to get him back so he can have a non-yelling parent who will be uncomplicatedly good and the angel who watches over him.

(More on that dynamic once they interact a bit)

-

The fact Sam summons the spectre of John to tell Dean that he told him to put a bullet in Sam... Of course Dean can refute what John said and that Sam deserves to be saved which is lovely but you know. Awful argument. Not really the time for that sentiment :P Dean can see Sam - knows and trusts him like no one else in the universe; even Cas in some respects, because Cas is complicated and it's always so messy, that he keeps on giving Cas trust but Cas leaves or does stuff Dean doesn't approve of, and Sam is generally easier for him to deal with...

(Also the complicated feelings about Cas)

-

Sam goes and demolishes that this is about Mary. That Dean might be SAD about her and losing her but that he knows as well as Sam that she's gone because she went into that fight willingly, to protect them.

Cas, on the other hand, Dean absolutely can't see past. Dean's *entire* problem with Jack is because he lost Cas. Because he looks at Jack and sees dead Cas. Sam can explain how Mary chose to punch Lucifer right in the face (hehe) in some easy steps, but Dean then spells out his perception on what happened to Cas because of Jack.

-

I am so not over how the only time I've seen Dean this angry with Sam is in 9x22 and he yells right in his face and - GAH. I mean he's been angry with him before but it was a cold, sad or defeated anger, usually with tears involved. This is wide eyed, crazed, Mark of Cain Dean, who then walked around the corner and flipped back to a smooshy smile because Cas was there.

And this fight is taking place in almost the same space of turf as that argument, because heeey war room where the wars take place.

-

At this point, after "you might be able to forget about that, but I can't", I am pretty sure that Destiel has just gone horrifically canon in like the worst possible way, that Dean calls out the difference in their feelings about Cas.

It's literally putting on the table "is sam a dick or does dean just love cas in a special kind of way"

and dear god, Sam is not a dick.

Sam is amazing.

-

But not as much as Misha Collins who got a special card with his name on and "starring" above it, just for opening his eyes and sitting up.

[movietvtechgeeks]

Latest story from https://movietvtechgeeks.com/mark-pellegrino-deconstructs-supernaturals-lucifer-redemption/

Mark Pellegrino deconstructs 'Supernatural's' Lucifer and redemption

I had the chance to have another nice, lengthy chat with Mark Pellegrino recently about his character, Lucifer. Mark doesn’t need much introduction … There’s been a lot of talk in the fandom about an article that you did – I don’t remember who it was with – but it had that quote that you said in this last episode [The Rising Son] about Lucifer being smart and not totally evil. There’s been a lot of talk about Sam’s experience with Lucifer and how badly he was tortured; when Sam and Lucifer do finally meet again in this season, is Sam still going to be so fearful of Lucifer? What are your thoughts on that whole situation? I imagine Sam is going to have some PTSD. You don’t spend time in the cage and come out of that experience completely whole. I think he will have some residual feelings about the old Lucifer. The dynamics in the universe have shifted, or are going to shift to a degree that people’s feelings about each other don’t matter so much. When the world was faced with fascism, America and the Soviet Union – sworn enemies ideologically – became allies. So weird things happen when universes shift. One of the other comments that I actually got involved in was someone was saying that they do not want to see Lucifer’s redemption, if Lucifer has a redemption arc. I said, if we don’t see Lucifer as a fully formed, well, angel in this case, he becomes just a one-dimensional foil for Sam and Dean, and honestly, that’s just boring. As the actor that plays Lucifer, I’m assuming that you prefer the roles where you have more than just a one-dimensional character to play. I do. You can’t act what isn’t there, but I always try to add different dimensions to a character, that I don’t necessarily see on the page. Redemption of a character like Lucifer – I’m not even sure what it means. Just think about it. Just because I see the mythology of Lucifer in our culture as one massive paradox, you know what I mean? On the one hand, there are these absolutely noble characters that he possesses, and if we saw them in a human being, we would say, “This man is a king of virtue.” His stubbornness, resilience, his insurmountable will and his sense of justice … and the thing that he’s probably put down for most, his sense of pride. To me, these are virtues. If I saw them in another person, instead of pride as in arrogance but pride as in a sense of justice and a feeling for your own ability to deal with the universe … it’s a different sensibility toward pride than the one that Western culture gives you. On the one hand, I seem him as the first rebel against authority; whose own personal characteristics drove him to say no. The first to say no. I see him as the being that introduced humanity to its moral sense. The paradox in all of this is that all of these characteristics are seen as sins in a religious world. Instead of rebellion, conformity and obedience are seen as virtues. Instead of an independent mind, and a moral sense, submission is seen as a virtue. Humility instead of pride, so somehow our society adopted – they say whoever wins the war dictates the history. Lucifer lost the war, so the opposition made the history and turned values upside down. So the guy who actually thinks he’s a figure of virtue, instead of vice, I don’t know what kind of arc that would be … to acknowledge the other side is right and to change from what he is, would mean embracing the opposite of what he stands for. I don’t want that to happen, but I do want healing to happen. I think that the bad parts of Lucifer’s character were bred from – I don’t think they are nature, I think they’re nurture, and this is an argument that was started by Sam. They’re just saying Lucifer is just inheritably bad, whereas Sam wants to apply a different kind of ethics to Jack, but I don’t think Lucifer is inheritably bad … I think his dad even said that. I think isolation from love and alienation from an entire universe, and being painted as the villain from time immemorial, can sour a person. Just in the five days that I was painted as worse than the devil himself in the eyes of social media were annoying as fucking hell! I can’t imagine going through it for a fucking eternity. And not being pissed off at everybody. That is so true. So if you have a sense of pride and dignity, when you’re being attacked like that, it’s going to inspire a vast reprisal. I think Lucifer’s desire for revenge – I used to think that was what motivated him but it seems a little different. I don’t remember if it’s already been filmed or if it’s happening in the future, but Lucifer has a very specific take on creation and on his father. And it’s not what you think. It’s actually kind of interesting. You’re going to see it in a few episodes. In this last episode, one of my favourite lines that Lucifer said something like, “You have no idea what I care about.” So what does Luci care about? I love that line, especially now, because of all the flack and pain that a certain group of people put me through. I see that most of the battles that we fight are fought against straw men. We forget that underneath that straw man we’re hacking to death there is a human being, and the real thing. That’s what I think I meant to her. She knows what she thinks I care about; she’s got her ideas of me. But she doesn’t know me. And I’m not going to tell you what Lucifer cares about; I think it would be revealing spoilers. That’s a great maxim that we should carry into life, don’t you think? You don’t know me, so stop acting like you do. Do you think there was any correlation between that first opening scene with Lucifer and Mary, in this last episode where Mary’s like you’re going to kill me, and Lucifer’s like no, I’m not, and then at the end when Michael basically has Lucifer by the throat and Michael’s like I need you, I’m going to let you live – do you think there are any correlations between those two situations? Oh yeah. I think that’s good writing, that’s power reversal right there, and Lucifer being put in Mary’s spot. Lucifer even said something about it in another episode. He’s definitely low man on the totem pole in this universe. What was so funny that he’s the low man on the totem pole in the narrative, which he keeps confronting, “What? This fucking place sucks!” Every time that he’s confronted with the narrative that Lucifer is dead, he’s actually confronted with the fact that he’s not top dog in that world. That’s pretty castrating. One of the beautiful things that I love about Lucifer is his indomitable will. I don’t care where you find him, he’s still going to go, “Fuck ya. You’re not going to get me. You can tear me apart above the skies of Abilene, like you did to the alternate universe Lucifer, but my middle finger will still be flipping you off as I’m falling down to the ground.” You’ll see that too. You’ll see that Lucifer carries himself with his typical sassy, irreverent demeanor, no matter what horrible situation he finds himself in. That’s where Lucifer is very different from me. I’m oversensitive, and very affected by the things that people say and do to me … I may not seem that way because you see me probably battling people all the time … but I’m sensitive to the things that they say, and I feel like I don’t want to challenge people to harm me. Lucifer would challenge people to harm him. He pushes the limit all the way to the end and says, “Let’s see how good you are, let’s see how strong you are. Let’s see if your will matches against mine.” At the end of the premiere episode, which really had me bawling – the scene where Sam and Dean and Jack are saying goodbye to Cas, Kelly Kline and Crowley … I don’t know how much you want to talk about Crowley’s demise … but because Crowley has been Lucifer’s nemesis for so long, do you think he actually maybe misses him? I hope you noticed that when Crowley showed up in the alternate universe, before he was sacrificed, Lucifer did something when he noticed it was Crowley. He kind of wriggled around on the ground and said, “Crowley!” That was sort of a spontaneous thing that happened in the moment … I think Lucifer’s character being what it is … he admires men and women without limits. He admires cleverness and intelligence and will. Crowley demonstrated the ability to outsmart him. He liked it … he liked the challenge … the challenge now of fighting this formidable being … like any great boxer is going to be defined by his opposition. Ali wasn’t Ali until he met Foreman and Frazier. And that’s what made him a champion. The same with Lucifer … I think he would see things in the terms of bring me your biggest challenge and I’ll meet it. I think he would miss Crowley to be honest. Especially with this new guy Asmodeus coming up. That guy’s a real piece of work. I think he’s a lot worse and a lot more powerful than Crowley. Crowley was sort of an ambitious CEO … sort of a ruthless CEO, there was something about his intelligence that I admire. I don’t think that’s the same with Asmodeus, he’s a tyrant. So in answer to that, I think yes, I think Lucifer would miss Crowley. The season premiere really hit me, at the end when Sam is talking to Jack and explaining how you say goodbye to someone who has passed. (To read my review regarding this episode, go here.) Sam’s line – and Jared’s delivery of that line – was exactly what I needed to hear at exactly the right time. And that’s one of the reasons why I love Supernatural … it seems to have the timing of picking up on stuff that is the perfect timing for a lot of things. I know that’s the way it is for a lot of people as well. I thought that was an interesting for Sam to say as well. I thought it was a great summation of the process of understanding death for the living. Here’s what I love about Supernatural – we all know that the story is about family … but it’s about orphans. It’s about people who’ve had to become their own guide in a crazy universe, and only had each other to rely on. That’s pretty powerful … so many of us come from broken homes, where we miss one parent or there are other abusive family relationships … if you come to the world fractured and you have to survive by your own wits. Being in a show like this, even as fantastical as it is … it’s possible to defy even a whole universe and be right. To be treated like they were, but still find love and loyalty … the family don’t end in blood thing is all about that. I think that’s why so many people find solidarity in the show itself.

Movie TV Tech Geeks News

[winchesterprincessbride]

Poor Little Rich Girl-Part 3

This is an A/B/O AU

*Warning for domestic violence trigger****but girl power conquers all!

Your father Lucifer, is the Alpha of your pack and he rules your town with an iron fist.  He is forcing you to marry the son and heir of a rival pack.  It is 3 weeks before your wedding when you find out Sam Winchester is back.   Sam was your first love at 17, and when your father found out, he forced his family to leave town.  You haven’t spoken to him since.  What will happen when you see him again?

Characters: Alpha! Sam Winchester, Beta! Dean Winchester, Omega!Castiel Novak, Omega! Mary Winchester, Reader, Alpha! (Nick) Lucifer, Beta! Michael, Beta! Gabriel, Beta! Stephanie (OC), Alpha Eric (OC) Chuck (mentioned)

Master List

Introduction (all parts are linked)

Text messages are listed in Bold

“Please tell me you're going tonight,” I whispered to Steph the minute she answered her phone.

“Of course I am.  What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t have your back against that asshole?”  Steph barked.  Saying that my best friend hated my fiancee would be a vast understatement.  Steph LOATHED Eric.

She didn’t like the way he talked down to me or the way he looked at any female that came in his line of vision.  Her older brother David had told her he’d heard whispered stories of some twisted shit that went on in the Whitehall pack.

“Steph”.  I sighed.  “You know I have no choice, right?”

“I know you THINK you don’t have a choice.” Steph snapped.  We’d had this conversation before.   “This is America, not medieval England.  You father can’t legally force you to marry someone you don’t even like, just because he’s the Alpha.  He should want what’s best for you, and Eric is so not it.  Please don’t do this, Y/N.  Please, I’m begging you.  There’s something in Eric’s eyes...... Something that scares me.”

Anyone who knows me knows I can’t bake to save my life, so it was off to Mrs. Robideaux’s bakery for something sweet to bring to the pack meeting.  Uncle Gabe had been famous for his sweet tooth, so I was sent to Mrs. R’s for cakes and baked goods from the time I learned to ride a bike.

Mrs. R. was a rotund African-American woman who was always covered in flour and smelled like cinnamon and vanilla.  She gave the best hugs.  When she saw me a smile lit her face and she came from behind the counter.

“And just where have you been, young lady? Your Uncle Gabe must be in town because I haven’t seen you in here in ages.”

“He should be coming in soon for the wedding.  I came to get some of your lemon bars for the pack meeting tonight.”  I said as I hugged her tightly.

I saw the smile on her face falter slightly as I mentioned the wedding.  She gave a nod to her niece Thea to continue waiting on customers as she pulled me into the back for a chat as she had so many times before.

“Are you sure about this, Y/N? I have heard things.....I just want to make sure you're not in over your head.”

I closed my eyes for a brief moment, feeling completely overwhelmed with my life.  Why couldn’t this be a real wedding? Why couldn’t people be congratulating me, instead of worrying I was making a huge mistake?  Why couldn’t I be looking forward to my wedding with breathless anticipation, instead of feeling like I was simply exchanging one prison for another?

The pack meeting was held at an old hunting lodge in the woods outside of town.  Eric, and his father would be attending as part of the delegation from the Whitehall pack.  Knowing my Dad, he was going to pull out all the stops to impress them with a show of his power as Alpha.

At least I had one thing to be happy about.  When I got home from Mrs. R’s, Uncle Gabe was in my father’s study talking with him and Uncle Michael.  He had his feet up on the coffee table, ignoring my Dad’s frown of irritation as usual.  He jumped up as soon as he saw me.

“Hey beautiful! Did you miss me?” He opened his arms wide and I ran to him like I did when I was a little girl.

“Always, Uncle Gabe, Always.  Where’s Kali?” I asked immediately.

“She’ll be coming in for the wedding, but she had some work stuff to finish up first.” He said smoothly.  Kali was Uncle Gabe’s mate. She worked for one of Dad’s many companies doing who-knows what.  No one told me much of anything.  Everyone in the family worked for my Dad.

“Y/N,” My Dad said, turning to me. “You should go and get ready.”

“Ready for what?” I asked grumpily.  “To be seen and not heard?”

My father glared at me, and Uncle Gabe snickered.  “I need to go pick up Steph.  She asked for a ride.  She’s having car trouble.”

“We can catch up afterwards, Uncle Gabe.  I want to hear all about your adventures!” I told him, kissing him on the cheek and earning his trademark smirk in return.  I was so happy he was back.  Everything seemed so much lighter and more pleasant when he was around.

I left the room and Uncle Michael closed the door behind me.  I stood outside the closed door for a moment, and I could hear raised voices, my fathers and Uncle Gabe’s.  “I don’t Like this, Luci, not one damn bit!  I’ve heard that Eric has a really bad temper, and the Whitehall Alphas treat their Omegas like shit!”

“Y/N will be fine.” My father said smoothly.  “We need this alliance.Besides, do you really think he would be stupid enough hurt her? She is a strong independent Omega.  She’s just like her mother.”

“Yeah, and look where it got her.” Michael said darkly.

When Steph and I arrived at the pack meeting, the Whitehall pack had already arrived.  I spotted Eric and instantly felt myself tense.  Oh he was handsome enough, but  when he touched me it made my skin crawl.

 As Steph and I walked over to the refreshment table to put down our treats, I heard an amused voice behind me.  “You still remembered that I like lemon bars?”

I took a deep breath and turned around.  “Hi, Sam.  You remember my friend Steph.  Steph.  This giant was once my math tutor Sam Winchester.  And this is his brother Dean.”

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I tensed momentarily, but it was only Uncle Gabe.  “Sam, Dean, Steph.  You guys all remember my Uncle Gabe, right?  He just flew in for the.....for the wedding.”

Sam’s jaw clenched at the mention of the wedding. As we stood talking, I felt a hand reach over and slide down the curve of my ass. I jumped and turned to see who the pervert was.  What the hell? 

I saw Steph roll her eyes at Dean and I knew t was Eric.  “Hey, Babe.  Who are your friends?” He asked, not bothering to introduce himself.

I tried not to clench my teeth as I spoke.  “Eric, this is Sam and Dean Winchester, old friends of mine.  They are joining the pack tonight.”

“Hey,”  Eric said, nodding his head.  He smirked at Steph.  “Hey, Steph.  Once Y/N and I are mated, we are gonna have to find you a mate in the Whitehall pack.  I know some guys that would love a hot piece like you.”

Steph gasped and her face turned red.  “I will NEVER let that happen, Eric,” I said, glaring at him and grabbing Steph’s hand, I hauled her off to the bathroom.

Eric acted like I hadn’t spoken.  Sam and Dean watched me drag Steph to the bathroom as fast as possible to get away from him.  “That Y/N is a feisty one.” He told them conversationally.  “But I’m gonna knot that feistiness outta her real quick.  We like our Omegas a little more......docile in Whitehall.  Know what I mean, boys?” He shot Sam and Dean a telling grin before walking away.

Sam cursed under his breath and started to head in Eric’s direction.  “No Sam,” Dean said firmly.  “Don’t.  Now is not the time or place.  Calm the fuck down.” Dean’s hard grip on Sam’s arm kept Sam from charging after the other Alpha and kicking his ass.

“There is no fucking way this wedding is happening, Dean,” Sam growled at his brother.

“You flipping your shit right now isn’t gonna do Y/N any favors. Stick to the plan.” Dean hissed.

My father called the meeting to order, Uncle Michael and Uncle Gabe at his side.  It was so strange to see Uncle Gabe looking serious and unsmiling. Dad’s commanding voice held the room at attention.

“Tonight we welcome our guests from the Whitehall pack.  In two weeks my daughter Y/N and Eric, the son of their Alpha, will be married. We hope this union will end years of tension and hostility between our packs.”

“Don’t count on it.” I muttered under my breath.

Sam and Dean were welcomed as new members of the pack and they both took the oath of fealty to the Alpha.  I knew Sam didn’t mean of a word of it.  Why was he doing this?  What did he hope to accomplish?

I had finally gotten Steph calmed down.  Eric had really rattled her.  After the meeting was over and people started to leave, Eric said he wanted to talk to me.  “Wedding stuff.”  He said tersely.

“I have to take Steph home.  I’m her ride.” I said weakly.

“I can give her a ride home.” Dean offered.  “I came straight from work so Sam and I rode separately.  I mean, if that’s okay with her.  Steph nodded, not saying much, which was rare for her.

Sam had already left, without even saying goodbye.  Dean said he “wasn’t feeling well”, which was utter bullshit.  I could feel the anger rolling off him in waves as soon as Steph and I left for the bathroom.  I kept sneaking looks at him during the meeting and he looked like his head was gonna explode.

“Okay, Eric.  I’ll come with you.” I said meekly.

Everyone had pretty much left when he and I started walking out.

“What was that crap with you contradicting me in from of your friends, huh Y/N?” He demanded suddenly.

“What?” I asked, confused.

He grabbed my arm and pushed me up against his car.  “You don’t EVER contradict me in front of people, Omega.”

“Get the fuck off of me, you asshole!” I demanded.  

He leaned in and kissed me hard until I bit his lip, then he pulled away with a curse. When he touched his hand to his lip and it came away bloody he cursed and backhanded me hard, knocking me back against the car, his ring splitting my lip.

He started to undo his belt.  “I think I need to start your lessons early, Omega.  I’m gonna fuck that fire right outta you, and fill you up with my pups.  Starting right now.”

I reached into my purse which hung across my body and felt around for my can of wolfsbane spray and sprayed Eric full in the face.  He screamed and clutched at his eyes.  I got to my feet and kicked him in the nuts as hard as I could.  He dropped like a stone, moaning and crying and clutching at his groin.  His eyes were rapidly swelling shut.

I sent Steph a quick text

Please have Dean call Sam to come get me.  I’ll explain later

I pulled off my engagement ring and dropped in in Eric’s lap.  “Lesson’s over, Alpha.”

Part 4

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[mittensmorgul]

5.14:

Same, Cas. Same.

Lizbob was laughing at me earlier because I’m in the middle of this seemingly long stretch of episodes that involve Major Fandom Disagreements. And this is one of them. Because of this ^^

Under a cut because JIMINY CHRISTMAS THIS ONE GOT LONG...

(read more excised due to tumblr being shifty)

I will preface this episode review post with this disclaimer: CASTIEL’S LOVE OF CHEESEBURGERS IN THIS EPISODE IS NOT “PROOF” THAT JIMMY’S SOUL WAS STILL IN CASTIEL’S VESSEL AFTER 4.22.

Because everything else about s5 DISPROVES that Jimmy’s soul was still in there. I mean, if you believe that Cas being blown up by Lucifer in 5.22 was what “killed” Jimmy and sent his soul to Heaven, then why wouldn’t Cas being killed IN THE EXACT SAME FASHION by Raphael in 4.22 have done the same? You can’t have it both ways. Either being torn apart on a molecular level by an archangel kills a vessel or it doesn’t. If it does, Jimmy died in 4.22. If it doesn’t, then HE SHOULD STILL BE IN THERE, BUT CAS SAID DEFINITIVELY THAT HE’S BEEN IN HEAVEN FOR YEARS.

Since 4.22.

But, you might say BUT THEN WHY WOULD CAS HAVE BLAMED HIS HUNGER FOR RED MEAT ON HIS VESSEL? NAME CHECKING JIMMY SPECIFICALLY?!

Uh, angels aren’t incapable of lying, or deflecting the truth. And EVERYTHING about Cas’s body language in that scene screams prevarication.

Castiel: It's my vessel -- Jimmy. His, uh, appetite for red meat has been touched by Famine's effect.

Dude’s shifty as FUCK okay? He doesn’t want to admit how “human” he was becoming, cut off from Heaven. He spent all of s5 in a slow slide from grace. He couldn’t heal Bobby in 5.02, he couldn’t hunt Raphael alone in 5.03, he couldn’t smite Meg in 5.10, in 5.13 booping Sam and Dean back in 1978 nearly kills him, in 5.16 he’s reduced to trying to communicate with Dean in heaven via radio and a tv, and after 5.18 he’s rendered utterly human AND BRAIN DEAD FOR A TIME. I mean, he’s forced to use a GUN in 5.21 and a holy oil molitov in 5.22 because he’s just got no juice left. None. BUT IF HE’S NOT AN ANGEL THEN WHAT THE HELL IS HE?! He is terrified, that’s what. And this is his version of Denial.

He can’t even look at Dean when he says it. He’s been staring at Dean wide eyed up to this point, but when Dean questions it, he looks down at the burger, hesitates, and then blames his vessel as he BODILY TURNS AWAY FROM DEAN because he is so far in denial...

Okay, for those who don’t believe that and will only take Word Of God (aka authorial intent) as proof? BEN EDLUND SAID THE SAME DAMN THING:

“I always reserve in Castiel’s overall makeup the fact that there is an aspect of him that is purely flesh and purely human, which can function as it did in an episode before as a real Achilles’ heel, when he started to eat meat, because he just loved red meat. He couldn’t stop himself.”

I.e., THAT WAS ALL CAS. In his very own human body, with his very own human desires and feelings and tastes and vulnerabilities.

Castiel: I've developed a taste for ground beef. Dean: Well, have you even tried to stop it? Castiel: I'm an angel. I can stop anytime I want.

BUT HE VERY CLEARLY COULD NOT STOP. So what does that mean about the rest of his argument there-- that because he was an ANGEL he could stop whenever he wanted.

(insert “he’s no angel” tag here)

Okay, now that we have that all squared away, on with the fun!

*pushes play*

*regrets pushing play while watching a couple literally eat each other to death*

It’s Valentine’s day, and Dean and Sam have no real leads on the case, but Sam expects Dean to go out to celebrate Unattached Drifter Christmas. But Dean’s “not feeling it.”

SAM That's when a dog doesn't eat-- That's when you know something's really wrong. DEAN Remarkably patronizing concern duly noted. Nothing's wrong. We gonna work or what?

Dean doesn’t acknowledge that anything is wrong, because he feels... fine. I mean, he’s not troubled about anything. He’s not feeling the need to Perform anything.

Like in 12.18 we’ve been talking about how Dean uses sex as a coping mechanism. How he’s used alcohol, fighting, hunting even, not to mention LITERAL medications to self-medicate. Those are his go-to self-soothing things.

So if Famine blows into town and magnifies everyone’s desires, makes them “rabid” for the things they want-- like the cupid’s couple who were so starved for physical affection they tried to consume one another, like the second couple in the office who wanted to be Everything And All to each other without anything ever coming between them and ended up in a suicide pact so nothing would ever come between them again--

(JIM I don't know, baby. Seems like whatever we do, something in life is always gonna keep us apart-- Work, family, sleep .JANICE Now prison, maybe...JIM Maybe. But I think I have an idea...How we can stay together...forever...)

Like Cas giving in to his VERY HUMAN HUNGER for cheeseburgers (I miss you PB&J), and Sam giving in to his lust for demon blood... DEAN WAS NOT UNAFFECTED BY FAMINE.

It’s what Dean was literally starving for-- to be whole, to not NEED any of his coping mechanisms, to be able to drop the performance and just BE himself. Of course Famine would see it this way:

FAMINE:  That's one deep, dark nothing you got there, Dean. Can't fill it, can you? Not with food or drink. Not even with sex. DEAN Oh, you're so full of crap. FAMINE Oh, you can smirk and joke and lie to your brother, lie to yourself, but not to me! I can see inside you, Dean. I can see how broken you are, how defeated. You can't win, and you know it. But you just keep fighting. Just... keep going through the motions. You're not hungry, Dean, because inside, you're already...dead.

The smirking and joking? That’s Performing Dean. The “empty” bit isn’t Dean being “dead inside,” but the part of Dean that can reject the performance, that doesn’t NEED to be “filled,” because it’s already at peace with itself.

I am sort of skipping around here a bit... back to the morgue. Dean is amused by the coroner dude. So am I. That doesn’t bode well for the dude. The life expectancy of side characters who Dean finds amusing (like the guy Dean likes because he says “okey dokey”) usually drops to around zero.

Ew, Dean.

But the heart is the key, Sam recognizes the Enochian letter on it, so Dean calls Cas.

I don’t know what’s come over me. I don’t usually infuse these things with a lot of pics and gifs, but I like this episode. (ง’̀-‘́)ง

I think part of it lies in this significant thing that has also been a theme during s12 (and even during s11):

The DIFFERENCE between Sam’s reaction and Dean’s reaction to Cas.

When Cas asserts that a cupid has gone rogue and they have to stop him before he kills again... I mean, someone please offer me a non-desitel-related explanation for this difference, because I can’t find one anywhere.

(I am not actually soliciting non-destiel readings of this scene. I truly do not care about non-destiel readings of this scene. I’m just being hyperbolic)

But aside from the fact that everyone is in agreement about the cupid’s “handshake” technique

what do we really learn from meeting this particular cupid?

DEAN Why does heaven care if Harry meets Sally? CUPID Oh, mostly they don't. You know, certain bloodlines, certain destinies. Oh, like yours. SAM What? CUPID Yeah, the union of John and Mary Winchester--Very big deal upstairs, top priority arrangement. Mm. DEAN Are you saying that you fixed-up our parents? CUPID Well, not me, but... Yeah. Well, it wasn't easy, either. Ooh, they couldn't stand each other at first. But when we were done with them--Perfect couple. DEAN Perfect? CUPID Yeah. DEAN They're dead! CUPID I'm sorry, but... the orders were very clear. You and Sam needed to be born. Your parents were just, uh...meant to be. (sings) A match made in heaven- heaven! (Dean punches Cupid)

So heaven wanted John and Mary to get together. After 5.13 and what Michael told Dean about his “destiny,” this just adds another horrifying layer to all of that. Because “Destiny” was being rigged by heaven. Angels literally were the “agents of fate,” pulling every cosmic string to get all the pieces to line up exactly to bring on the apocalypse.

HORRIFYING.

John and Mary couldn’t stand each other at first, until the event Dean described in 12.01 about how John and Mary started dating?

Dean: Dad told me. March 23, 1972 you walked out of a movie theater, Slaughterhouse-Five, you loved it. And you bumped into a big marine and knocked him on his ass. You were embarrassed and he laughed it off, said you could make it up to him with a cup of coffee. So you went to, uh, Maroni's, and you talked and he was cute, and he knew the words to every Zeppelin song, so when he asked you for your number you gave it to him even though you knew your dad would be pissed. That was the night that you met-

So they couldn’t stand each other BEFORE this intervention by the cupid, who probably shoved the two of them into each other right there...

Like the instant change of heart that came over the two dudes in the bar in 8.23 after the cupid touched them. EVEN DEAN NOTICED THE CHANGE IN THEM.

Okay, back to the show, slightly out of order again, because I keep pausing it to go on mental tangents... I’m not constrained by the time limits of the TNT loop. Hooray for Blu-Rays. :P

*Dean absolutely COVERS his burger in ketchup, just like he does in 12.18, but here in 5.14 he doesn’t have an appetite for it. He’s not trying to “fill the void” inside himself. Instead, Cas takes his burger... like Dean eventually does to Cas’s burger in 10.09... but Cas doesn’t even get a bite before he spots the cupid and chases him down*

*the cupid hugs the crap out of Dean, then Cas, then Sam, then Cas makes him cry, then Dean punches him, and Cas tells Dean he hurt the cupid’s feelings... :P*

*have I mentioned how much I love this episode?*

SAM You just punched a Cupid! DEAN I punched a dick! SAM Um...Are we gonna talk about what's been up with you lately or not? DEAN Or not.

(something finally required Dean “self-medicating”, finally shattered the relative Calm he’d achieved so far this episode, and he lashed out)

*blah blah blah Famine blah blah I already covered the rest of this in the first section of this post...*

Sam doesn’t hunger for the blood itself, but for the power it gives him.

Just like Dean doesn’t hunger for food or sex or alcohol or violence. They’re just tools to help him manage. They are a performance.

I mentioned this in another review recently... maybe even the one for 12.10, but this is the EXACT scene Sam lampshaded for us outside the diner. In 5.14:

DEAN Demons. You want to go over the plan again? Hey, happy meal. The plan? CASTIEL I take the knife, I go in, I cut off the ring hand of Famine, and I meet you back here in the parking lot. DEAN Well, that sounds foolproof. (Castiel disappears) This is taking too long. (Dean gets out of the car)

Dean gave Cas like TEN WHOLE SECONDS before he decided it was taking too long. And he was right to be worried. Cas was completely overcome by Famine.

And in 12.10, after Cas goes into the diner alone, Dean is pacing grumpily for maybe a minute or two before Sam mutters under his breath:

SAM: And you're gonna storm in right... now. 

Sam knows.

But Famine here gives Sam and Dean VERY SIMILAR ASSESSMENTS of themselves, yet puts Sam’s situation in a “positive” light and Dean’s in a “negative” light... because he is bound to Lucifer. He’s “fattening Sam up” for Lucifer. He doesn’t care one jot about Dean. What for Dean was a vast void of emptiness that he’d never be able to fill (dead inside!) for Sam is a blessing for the exact same reason. Context matters...

FAMINE Stop! No one lays a finger on this sweet little boy. Sam, I see you got the snack I sent you. SAM You sent? FAMINE Don't worry. You're not like everyone else. You'll never die from drinking too much. You're the exception that proves the rule. Just the way...Satan wanted you to be. So... (Famine lifts his hands and gestures at the demons guarding him)...cut their throats. Have at them!

Sam gets ONE GLORIOUS VICTORY here, but it came at the price of him giving in to his hunger for power:

FAMINE I'm a Horseman, Sam. Your power doesn't work on me. SAM You're right. But it will work on them. (Sam uses his power to rip out all the souls Famine consumed)

So he has to be locked in detox again. At the very end, we finally see a crack in Dean--

CASTIEL That's not him in there. Not really. DEAN I know. CASTIEL Dean, Sam just has to get it out of his system. Then he'll be-- DEAN Listen, I just, uh...I just need to get some air. [Dean goes outside and looks up at the sky] DEAN Please...I can't...I need some help. Please?

Praying to God for help, Dean? When you had an angel by your side a moment ago who was more than willing to help? Right, Famine’s influence is gone. Your Calm Center is gone too. You can’t let yourself feel okay with Cas anymore. Not to mention a part of his “peacefulness” throughout the episode was due to Sam being “okay.” And he’s so not okay right now...

What is Dean’s hunger? Not to be hungry for anything. To have Cas by his side (though maybe not on a burger binge), to have Sam happy and healthy and whole-- and wholly human. To know they’re all working together. To trust them both completely and have them trust him in return.

ETA: Because Heck while rereading this I forgot: It’s been said plenty of times before, but this is also a huge part of why Sam controls everything he eats. BECAUSE HE NEEDS THAT CONTROL. It’s self-medicating the same way Dean’s self-medicating with what HE can control for himself.

I think a lot of both Sam’s performance of “normality” and Dean’s Performing Dean persona are coping mechanisms, and are rooted in the very same need to have any sort of control over their lives.

[the-hunters-rebel-heart]

Ideas

Right, so i have oodles of ideas... can picture some of them... Need to figure out the sequence. Need to get the outlines and mindmaps together.

Crud lol.

Idea 1 (already written but could do muuuch better - story Five in my Sam’s Love Story Series) - Jessica Moore Returns and Sam Winchester is in a Relationship with another woman. Yeah... nice and angsty... could be much angstier than what I have written.

Idea 2: Demon!Dean :-D Dean has adopted a hell hound (oh my god the angst) and Demon!Dean fathers a child. Ohhh this could be such a treasure trove of angst and plot. Maybe part of my aforementioned series

Idea 3: Dean has a twin... who turns out to be related to Garth Fitzgerald IV through adoption! OMG, and this twin is a frigging FED! I mean, what the hell could go wrong? Bahahahaha. Okay, so he’s a former FED who is wanted by the government... might have the NSA pick him up, pardon him, and make him an Agent there... but Bahahahaha... so much sweet, sweet angst. Another one of the aforementioned series.

Idea 4: Sam and Dean have been hiding some pretty massive secrets... *cough kids cough* who aren’t exactly human... and the Men of Letters go after their families and just... Mary ends up in the middle, her maternal instincts finally kick in and it’s like... WTF. This could get fluffy and angsty at the same time. This would NOT be related to my other writings.

Idea 5: Two young hunters come busting into the present from the future and they turn out to be Sam adn Dean’s sons... or a son and a daughter... or something ... and this could prove hilarious. Not related to anything else

Idea 6: Sam and Dean have to, with the help of some others, gather some Weapons that were made by Chuck or Amara or whatever, before they fall into the wrong hands, and end up imbibed with the powers of those weapons... like angelic or demonic powers or something. Yeah - still thinking about this one. May do something where they have to gather these objects and become angels in the end. Not sure yet. Unrelated

Idea 7: Castiel has a girlfriend? Or he has a kid he’s been hiding for a long, long time... or both? I’m not sure yet... been turning the gears on this one in my brain for a few months - haven’t decided where I want to go with it. unrelated

Idea 8: Amara created an angel of her own before being locked away, and Chuck hid from him that he was her creation instead... but something has been suspected since the Angels fell that he was different... and maybe, just maybe, he doesn’t need a vessel... like... she was trying to appease Chuck to get him to pay attention to and love her again by creating this angel and he locked her away anyway before discovering her creation? Unrelated (maybe)

Idea 9: Right, so I did an unrelated fic where Crowley was Sam and Dean’s birth father. What if, and this could prove hilarious, but what if Cass turned up as Sam and Dean’s father which is why they were chosen as Michael and Lucifer’s vessels? Like John was Cass’s vessel at one time and Mary didn’t know it. I don’t think the ones who are all for Destiel will like this... but I see them more as family than lovers (I don’t ship destiel). When I say family, I mean like brothers. unrelated

Idea 10: Right, so what if the whole thing with the MoC didn’t happen, and after the Garth incident, Sam and Dean went their own ways... and Dean ended up falling hard for a werewolf and having a kid with her... and then somehow Mary was brought back and ended up working with the MoL... and yeah... or even Mary AND John were revived somehow... and don’t realize the woman they tried to kill was Dean’s wife... nor that they placed their grandkid in danger? unrelated

Idea 11: Sam and Dean have long lost kids? Like, the darkness had totaled the Impala or something, Sam and Dean got separated, and Dean and Sam were having problems finding each other... and maybe Dean was injured enough to need medical attention... only to be found by his daughter... unrelated (of course)

Idea 12: Sam and Dean are reincarnations of the original Men of Letters - two men who started the entire thing... actually, i started this one a long time ago in another form and it ran out of steam - just am not sure where I want to go with it. unrelated

Idea 13: Dean manages to shut the Gates of Hell after a fight with Sam - ends up reviving a year and a half later... and... I’m not quite sure where I want to go with that either... Like, I’m really not. unrelated

Idea 14: Sam and Dean have hidden that they are Government Agents from each other for almost forever but find out about it. unrelated

Idea 15: Mmmm... there’s just something about Dean having been a Marine that I kinda like, and Sam doesn’t know about it... like hunting is actually a Marine Black Op, and Dean is the head of the operation and stuff... and go through and explain his severe, severe, severe fear of flying... like while he was on tour or something, his plane went down or something, and his ... unit? Platoon? I don’t know which one to go with, is being murdered for their connection to him from something that happened during one of his tours while Sam was in college? Alright, so I’m a sucker for an NCIS crossover story - from the days of Ziva and Tony. unrelated

Idea 16: So I’m a sucker for a Dukes of Hazzard crossover too - and the show is NOT racist (if you think that, you’re a bigot because some of the most beloved characters were black! The flag was not used in the racial context, it was used to represent rebellion against a corrupt legal system which is WHY Robert E Lee fought for the South is he thought the US legal system was corrupt and although he did own slaves, he was considering releasing them before the war broke out. Lee was first choice for the Union Army General before Grant... well that and Lee was from Virginia and was loyal to his state as was common in that day). *clears throat* anyway, now that that is out of the way - Sam and Dean time travel back to the 1980′s to save a Nephilim or something, and said Nephilim eventually ends up transported to the present time or sometime within the Supernatural timeline... yeah, still thinking this one out :-) unrelated

Idea 17: So Bobby hired help, and is unaware she is a bad ass hunter, and she ends up saving their asses when something gets loose on Bobby’s property. Still formulating this one. unrelated - could be come another series like the other series?

Idea 18: Purgatory ends up spewing its guts, and Benny Lafitte returns... yeah, still trying to figure this one out too. unrelated

Idea 19: Sam or Dean is suffering mental illness... just because... like addiction or something. unrelated

Idea 20: Right, so this dates back to the Human!Impala phase that went around Tumblr... but... what if the Impala had the soul of a woman trapped within due to a witch’s curse? Nothing romantic... more a maternal thing toward Sam and Dean. unrelated

Idea 21: Criminal Minds crossover :-D Goes back to the whole secret agent idea where Sam or Dean is an FBI agent and the other doesn’t know about it. unrelated

Idea 22: alright, so this is a Lifetime Movie Ripoff, and I think someone else hinted at this idea too but - Jessica Moore was having an affair with another man, Sam had a very large life insurance policy, and Jess wanted it, and maybe she framed Sam as someoen who he wasn’t and after her death, the guy thinks Sam murdered her due to all the lies, and goes a hunting for Winchester? unrelated

Idea 23: Okay, so, uh, Twin!Dean idea with my Twin!Dean OC where Cole Trent knows Dean’s Twin and something happened to Trent’s wife and son or something and Trent starts hunting and teams up with his old USMC buddy? My OC btw, is exMarine and FBI or NSA depending on the fic. unrelated. Still trying to figure this one out.

Idea 24: Right, so I’ve written stories like this Twice already, but there’s just something that doesn’t get old about Dean Winchester having a siamese twin and finding out about it lol. Like... maybe make a series of fics about Dean Winchester having a Twin brother?

Idea 25: Mary ends up finding out a friend was tossed from the 80′s to present day... like a girl she was mentoring... and said girl is involved with her youngest son... with a nice angsty hunt mixed in for good measure.

Like... God I’m awful lol.

And some of these are pretty damned unique ideas that I have YET to see in this fandom.

This is why I let my characters guide me in writing and coming up with ideas.

But this is faaaar too many ideas and I will probably never write them all. Some of these ideas, I’ve had on the drawling board for a few years. Some of them I started writing with a friend but never finished.

Like... Honest... and this isn’t even all the ideas I have!!!!

So what are everyone’s favorite ideas listed here??? (reminder: I do NOT write smut or Reader Inserts or for real living people or Destiel or Wincest or Sam as Gay or Dean as Gay even if I do poke fun in some of my unfinished stuff that I abandoned... well, you get the idea... and I do write Charlie as a Lesbian if and when I try to write her).

If you use any of these ideas... I WANT CREDIT.