#man i wish these books were good

[mellpenscorner]

Jane Austen: and here we have the love interest. He might have some issues, but once you get to know him, he's a great guy. Good looking, heart of gold, the works.

Charlotte Brontë: get ready for the weirdest man you have ever met.

[tiktaalic]

list of good horror writers

-shirley jackson

-paul tremblay

-komodobits

end of list.

[moe-broey]

That one meme but it's Moe lore🧍

Directly reffed some battle scenes for the bgs! (Under cut!)

Askr castle and tbh Askr motifs as a whole you are so. Difficult.

[shummthechumm]

part of me wants to say that MV couldve really benefitted from being longer, but then i immediately remember that this is wc we are talking about and no matter what; they will find a way to deny just how dangerous a way of life following the code can be for those who don’t fit within it’s rules. 

all of warriors does this and it only confuses the narrative more. im not surprised that there is so much discourse surrounding the story and it’s characters, man. and on top of that the series is targeted towards kids in elementary school so. 

[weaponizedmoth]

Finally caught up with IWTV and what do you mean that vampires can sneeze????

[coquettesamosa]

just finished this one book and i have . thoughts.

[jackgoodfellow]

I've been viewing your Red Dwarf Pokemon AU and I love it. I just have a question: In that Universe, are Simulants and GELFs the same as in the original universe, or is it like Cyborg Pokemon and GELFs which are genetically engineered Pokemon (a bit like Mewtwo)?

Omg this is like my second ever ask!!! 😊

Simulants and GELFs are the same as they are in the original universe, but they all have thematically appropriate Pokémon too!

That way there can be Pokémon battles beyond Lister's Snorlax absolutely trouncing Rimmer's Snivy for the 100th time (after Rimmer demands a battle for the 100th time).

In some episodes, they run into Pokémon that are companions to other sentient life forms, and sometimes they run into planets full of wild Pokemon they've never seen before!

Other times, Pokémon on the ship start causing problems:

Lister leaving trash everywhere has resulted in way more Grimer than the ship can sustain and they need to find a trash planet for them to live happily in.

Magnemite have gotten into the ship's engine and are causing increasingly bizarre malfunctions.

A Ditto with sunglasses is out to cause problems by impersonating the ship's crew! Stuff like that!

Every once in a while, they can run into a legendary Pokémon. Which would be hilarious because the boys (with the exception of Kryten) are completely incapable of speaking to a majestic elder god with anything approaching the proper amount of respect!

They do probably run into a Mewtwo (or Mewtwo-like situation) at some point and then they have to deal with an angry super-intelligent, super-powerful, genetically engineered, malevolent Pokémon with major emotional issues.

It'd make for a great multi-part episode or movie special, and I picture it happening shortly before Rimmer goes off to be Ace (whereupon he will achieve the character growth we all deserved to see in canon)!

Early in the special, Lister's kindness is what first plants seeds of doubt about the value of cruelty in the Mewtwo creature's mind.

As the plot progresses, it seems more and more like a heartfelt speech from Lister might solve the whole thing.

But then, Lister is knocked out or temporarily turned into stone during the climax, and it is suddenly up to RIMMER of all people to make a last-ditch appeal to Mewtwo's sense of love and kindness!

("Well! We're doomed!" chirps the Cat, from whatever psychic prison he is stuck in. Kryten, who at this point has been reduced to his eyeballs by a psychic blast, somehow manages to nod in agreement. (But what they don't know is that I, Jack! am the one writing this special! And I am a very specific kind of writer.))

Rimmer looks at the possibly-dead Lister... looks at himself... and then looks at the furious psychic being killing them all...

And he ends up making an impassioned speech about how Lister doesn't deserve this. ("Maybe I do. Maybe even the Cat and Kryten. but not Lister.") About how Lister keeps seeing bits of good in everyone, even Rimmer. Lister even saw good in Mewtwo!

("Please... he's... he's a good man. Yes, he's a disgusting, childish idiot with less brain cells than dead liver cells, but he's a good person. Look into his brain. You have to see that. That has to count for something.")

This is the first time in the series we've seen Rimmer say something nice about Lister. The Cat and Kryten are dumbfounded.

And no one is more surprised than Rimmer that it actually works.

[artemismatchalatte]

Lady Chatterley's Lover is only confirming to me that I’m gay. It is a thoroughly unsexy book. Lawrence has managed to make me not like any of the characters so that the background descriptions and social commentary are the best parts of the book.

[bendgineer]

I think one of the reasons the Harris / Walz ticket has so much momentum is because the campaign is genuinely trying to put out this vibe of fun. Like that's all the "brat" thing is, the coconut jokes, just being kind of silly and fun.

And I think it's working, because let's be real, we are all exhausted. It's been all about preserving democracy, defeating fascism, the past eight years. The message has been "vote for us because the country is literally on the line". The vibes are not good when we are stuck back at that fight, and not even discussing trying to make progress on things like housing, healthcare, education, etc. And the fight to just stop fascism? All still true. Project 2025 is real and is extremely scary. We can't let that man back into office.

But the vibe was "vote for us otherwise we're all fucked :(" and now has shifted to "get in, we're making popcorn and then bullying fascists." Like a lot of the issues conservatives bring up, the Harris / Walz is just not engaging them in good faith, as they shouldn't. Republicans bring up abortion, and the Dems are just like, "you want 14 year old to give birth? Weirdo" and just leave it at that. Like YES, that's what you should do. Because it SHOULDNT be a debate. And it's working. This is how you defeat the identify politics thing Republicans have been trying to push for a while. Just mocking them for the stupidity of it all. "Like seriously? You think a book can make someone gay??? Hahaha." None of the Republicans are reacting well. They can't stand it. Vance even complained about bullying!!! Like do you KNOW who picked you as vp??? It's actually laughable, because they have no room to stand on when it comes to bullying.

And a huge part of the mocking and dismissing of Republicans is that the message is clear - were done debating all this stupid stuff. We've won the last two elections' popular vote - most Americans do NOT want christo-facism. It's time to move on. And that's what gives me hope, and the feeling of hope I think a lot of people have picked up on. It's time to address all the issues we've all wished we've been addressing the past decade. It's important we move onto that, and that's the message I'm getting from this campaign (We're not going back). I think it will resonate with a lot of people, because plainly, we're all just sick of this same old news cycle and fake rage bait over things like "should women have rights?", "Should gay people be allowed to exist?" The general populace have answered YES to both these multiple times, and it is time to move on. Maybe I'm being naive, but I am genuinely excited at the idea of putting to bed these debates (it's exhausting trying to fend your very existence) and moving on to actual economic and social policies that could fix a lot of deterioration over the last 2 decades.

[oysterie]

anyways I just finished swole by Michael Broduer 👍👍 extremely good much better than I was expecting esp cause the intro wasnt the best. But it was so good one of those memoirs that use the format of a memoir to give you the like history of niche topics (popularity of buff heros in Saturday morning cartoons and popularization of gyms across Europe and then later America and a look into the Boston gay scene of the 90s and summaries of multiple paintings and statues of Hercules and the body builders that they were models after) it was written very well. Good to read abt the state of alpha male online gymfluencers from a gay man who is very much in gym and power lifting culture but completely appalled by the online culture without ever being like "oh but the male loneliness epidemic" 👍 a lot of jokes and quips that fall flat but they're ignorable and maybe I'm just bad w humor. Like I'm impressed how much I enjoyed this book. He also brings up "tumblr muscle worship blogs" which was a jump scare while washing dishes at work

[softgrungeprophet]

man i really need to get on the current F4 run, it seems like a lot of fun, ryan north is very funny, and the alex ross covers are, as they say, banger

[alttheloco]

Bring back one-time purchase mobile games, I’m so sick of the ones riddles with ads T_T

I would wayyy rather pay like $2.99 for a game than have a free app that smacks me with ads for shitty dopamine addiction games every time I complete an action

[fairy-angel222]

Dilf! Toji helping his college gf study.. with his cock

Leaning against his door frame as he pushes it open wider. A smirk on his face as you shyly squeeze in past his frame.

You’re holding tons of books in your hands, peering up at him through your lashes as you hand them over. “So.. where do we start?” It makes his cock strain when you tilt your head with your lip nudged between your teeth. Curious as to how he of all people could actually help you study.

“You’ll see, doll.”

He sits you down on his lap with a silent groan. Flipping through pages in front of you as he watched your eyes barely scan over the page.

You huffed, turning around with your arms over his shoulder and a pout. “Come onnn, this is so boring.”

“Study, now.” His voice held no trace of playfulness, the deep rumble making you sigh as you turned back around. “Fine.”

You were so restless, twisting and turning in his lap making his grip tighten on your hips. The man’s breath hitching as his cock hardens.

“You know what doll? Change of plans.” You find his fat cock buried inside you instead. Your thighs twitching as you held back the urge to move, to grind, anything. You were so full, and he was so deep. You needed it.

“Please can i move?” You whimpered, arousal leaking lewdly out his thigh at the feeling of him sat directly against your spot. “P-plea.. haah— please.”

Toji grinned, his breath against your ear as he chuckled meanly. “How about this? For every question you get right, one point gets added to me absolutely ruining that tight little pussy of yours.”

Another whimper, “A-and if i get it wrong?”

“Minus one point of course. Hmm.. and let’s just say when i do fuck you. You won’t be cumming for a while.”

Question after question. Wrong answer after wrong answer. You were probably in the negatives already.

“T-toji ple-ase,” you hiccuped, small drops of tears threatening to spill at simply your neediness. You were so desperate for him to fuck you. Your pussy aching each time he turned you down.

Toji watched as you frustratedly wiped away your tears, pulling the book to you for you to read. Actually read. He was impressed, all so you could get a little bit of cock.

You spend at least thirty minutes studying the pages. Confident when Toji started asking questions. And you had every right to be, answering questions correctly after correctly. Your sniffled voice now turned smug making Toji’s eyes widen. That was hot and he fucking loved you.

“Now. Please fuck me,” you breathe.

“As you wish, doll.” He has you flipped over in an instant. Skirt bunched at your hips as he begins fucking into you. Veiny cock dragging against your walls with each starting thrust.

“Ahh— faster.”

Toji swore he could cum right there, speeding up the pace of his hips until he was ramming into you. Your body being rocked roughly against the couch’s fabric as you moaned loudly. Lips parted in thankful cries each time his hips met yours meanly. “So good, so fucking good.” You mewled, stomach tightening as tears welled in your eyes. Good tears this time.

Your back arched, hands hooking around his torso when your body began to tremble. So close to falling apart. “Nngh— Toji, ‘m so close.” You were right there at the edge, letting out a short scream when he reached down to rub at your clit.

“Yeah? Gonna cum f’ me doll? That’s it.. look at that.” He grunted, watching your eyes roll back with the blissful chant of his name. “It’s too bad i said you wouldn’t cum.”

You whined loudly when he slipped out of you, your hips bucking up towards him as your orgasm died down, adjusting to the new found emptiness. “You’re so mean Toji.”

He swiped his finger along your puffy lips. “I know. Now let’s try this again shall we?”

[luveline]

Jade can I please get a chatty af yapper sunshine girlfriend with Sirius?? Like May be someone tells her she talks a lot so she's super quiet around him cuz she's worried he'll get annoyed and break up with her but poor Sirius he misses his chatty girl and just angst with fluff

thank you for requesting! fem, 1.4k

James Potter means well. Honestly, you don’t think he has a mean bone in his body, so you try not to take it to heart. 

Unfortunately, your attempts to do so don’t work. They really, unquestionably don’t. By the time you’re outside of Sirius’ flat that afternoon, James’ small comment is all you can think of. 

“You’re so chatty I’m surprised you don’t run out of breath,” he’d said. Not without love. You’d bumped into him in Sainsbury’s and ended up talking for ages about one thing or another, you know him well, you’d even say you were friends, though he’s of course Sirius’ friend rather than your own. “But I’m the same. God, Sirius used to hate how much I talked, he’d be sick of me. I think I numbed him to it over the years.” 

You can’t imagine it. Sirius and James are best friends. With Remus, they’re the most in love threesome of friends you’ve ever met, and it’s nice; it makes you very proud to have a boyfriend who cares for others as deeply as Sirius cares for them. It’s like a constant demonstration of how he’s a good man. 

But you’d never stopped to consider that they weren’t always so seamless, and you’ve regrettably never considered that your constant talking is something that could put him off. 

You talk to Sirius about everything. There isn’t a word to describe the excitement of having someone waiting to listen to you every single night. You could tell him every detail of a day down to what colour socks you wore and you know he’ll sit there listening with his hand on the small of your back, or his fingers twined between yours. You’ve never felt so loved as to be able to just talk about everything and have him talk back. 

But… what if, this whole time, he’s been wishing for a little bit of quiet? 

What if eventually, the talking becomes too much? 

He must be with you for a reason. You aren’t holding the poor guy hostage, he acts like he’s mad for you ninety percent of the time (while the other ten percent is spent sleeping on your shoulder). 

Like now —you knock his door and you can hear him scrambling up from the sofa, the sound of a book dislodged or a remote hitting the rug, you’re not sure. The door yanks open and Sirius smiles at you, pulling you in through the gap with a familiar hand on your hip. 

“Hey,” Sirius says, tucking you against his side, “hey, did you get lovelier over the weekend?” He shoves the door closed and gives you a hug with one arm, pausing in the hall. “Sorry I couldn’t see you. I don’t think we should miss another weekend.” 

You have a lot to tell him. It’s been ages since you spent nearly three days apart, but James’ conversation stays at the front of your mind. 

You decide to be less overwhelming, but not less loving, curling your arm behind his head to pull his cheek down for a kiss. “I don’t think so, either.” 

Sirius tilts his head away from you in an invitation for more kissing. 

You’re at home in his flat. You take off your shoes and hang up your jacket. You change into a pair of jogging bottoms with loose legs and let him hoist you onto his bed for a few stolen kisses, though he isn’t propositioning you, and you end up laying across his bedspread with one of your legs in his lap as he tells you about his days without you, his thumb sliding with pressure down your calf. 

“Mostly I wished I’d asked you to come over anyways, even if it was just to sleep together at the end of the day. Maybe next time we can do that?” he asks. 

“Of course we can.” You smile at him indulgently. “I’d come over for twenty minutes if it was all I could get.” 

“Or I can come to you,” he says, “even if it’s just twenty minutes.” 

He smiles, a beaming thing, and leans down slowly for a soft kiss. 

“So,” he asks, his breath on your lips, “how was your weekend? Lonely?” 

“So lonely,” you tease lightly, eyes fluttering closed as he continues his massaging of your leg. “But it was okay. I missed you, really, and didn’t do much else.”

“No?” he asks. 

Your voice takes on a shine as he squeezes your knee, “Missed your hands.”  

“I missed your everything.” He grabs for your forearms and pulls you into a sitting position. “But everything was okay?” he asks more seriously. 

“Everything was fine.” 

He raises his eyebrows, but eventually lets them relax. “Well, okay. Good, sweetheart, I’m glad it was okay.” 

He persuades you into the kitchen to sit with him as he makes dinner, refusing to let you help, and yet insisting you be there in the same room, as though you’d like to be anywhere else. Sirius makes your favourite of his usual rotation, offering you spoonfuls for tasting, gaps of silence stretching as he struggles to find new conversation. You start answering his questions but remember time and time again that Sirius could become totally sick of you. He might already be. 

Sirius puts the food on a low heat and washes his hands. He wipes them dry, but when he takes your face, dampness lines the inside of his fingers. 

“I’d like for you to tell me what’s wrong,” he says gently, stroking at the line of your startled frown, “before it gets worse. Do you want to talk about it?” 

“Nothing’s wrong.” 

“Please don’t, lovely. If I’ve done something wrong, please tell me. I want us to last forever, and we can’t do that if you won’t tell me when I upset you.” 

“It wasn’t you,” you say instinctively, then regret it. 

“So someone has?” he asks, still so gentle as his hands coast down your neck like he’s sculpting you, coming to rest on the slopes leading to your shoulders. “You can tell me anything. You don’t have to keep it to yourself… please.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Sweetheart.” He frowns deeply. Couldn’t look more upset. “Of course I’m sure. Why wouldn’t I be?” 

You chew it over, not wanting or willing to cause ructions between Sirius and his oldest friend. “Well, I saw James today at the shop, and… we were talking about you…” 

He waits. “And?” 

“And he told me you– you don’t like talking. That you didn’t like talking, that James used to make you sick of it. So I know I talk too much and you’ve never made me feel like I shouldn’t, but I guess I got into my head thinking you’d get sick of me, too.” 

“When we were younger I didn’t like much of anything.” He curls an arm behind your neck to hold you in place, but it’s not a dominant sort of movement, only protective as your noses inch together. “Did you ever read that poem by Bukwoski? Let It Enfold You?” 

“What?” 

“I’m not very good at explaining myself. I thought if you knew the poem, you’d–” He laughs near your cheek. “I hated everything. It wasn’t James’ fault. He did make me sick of it sometimes, but I just wanted to hide from everything.” He breathes out slowly. “I’ve never wanted to hide from you. I can’t get sick of you. Do you get that? I can’t get sick of you. Listening to you is the best part of my day, you’re my personal chatterbox.” 

“Chatterbox,” you repeat teasingly. 

“You could talk for Wales,” he says. “And I love it, I don’t want you to stop, because I’ll never be sick of it.”

“I don’t want it to be some secret resentment.”

“I don’t resent you for anything. I knew exactly who you were when we met and I love it.” He takes your face again. “I love it,” he repeats. 

You steal a little kiss against the corner of his lips. “What was the poem?” you ask. 

“I’ll find my book, and you can read it to me. What do you think?” He takes a slow kiss as you had in the same place, words like honey. “I miss your voice.” 

He’s basically pleading. It’s not like Sirius to plead, but you pull it out of him. 

“Can I have my dinner first?” 

“The one I made while you deprived me?” he asks. “Yes, if you must.” 

He takes another kiss, but you’re happy to give it. 

[sweetcandyhigh]

PartnerToji who had never regretted his vasectomy… until you came along. Having it done was great, sure he didn’t like someone being all up in his business but it was affective. To him Megumi was more than enough, actually he could barely handle the kid. Plus it was easy to mess around and not have to worry about rubber or a scary missing period text.

Oh but sometimes, sometimes you made him question it. You had been together a few years, gotten accustomed to Megs, who sometime even preferred you over his dad, teaming up with you against him. And Toji knew you’d be a permanent thing ever since he cut off all his women he used to visit, and started working a real respectable job.

And the fantasies that filled his head when he looked at you were enough to fill a whole book series, you had made him consider having a second kid… but wait that’s right, he can’t have one. Every time you bent over, wear something even partially revealing, or hell when you took especially good care of Megumi he knew he wanted to make you a real mom, even if you did convince him you were fine with just Megs.

The idea of seeing you all round and plump, with his baby inside of you, god it made him rock solid. And you felt his wrath in the bedroom. He was making you work double time. Wishing, praying somehow, his sperm could make it past the little procedure, yet it never happened.

One day you got home from wherever you went, Toji didn’t pay much attention when you were telling him. Slipping your shoes off and walking up to see him on the couch, Megumi sitting on the floor fiddling with a new toy train he got, but it was odd… the tv wasn’t on. And he was on his phone? Honestly you couldn’t remember the last time he even spent more than a few minutes on it, that being pretty much only to text you or email his boss.

Slipping your arms around his shoulders from behind the couch as you looked down, “Watcha looking at Toj’?” You asked, only to have him grunt in response. A brow raised as you looked down catching a glimpse of what he was reading… a medical page? Was something wrong with him? Did something happen?

“Baby what’s wrong?” You cooed out as you softly ran your hand over his collarbone, he huffed shaking his head, “Nothin’” the one letter response making you roll your eyes. He huffed upon seeing the look on your face, “I’m looking at a reversal.”

A reversal? Reversal of what? “What’s that sweets?” You asked a raised brow, before he smirked, “I wanna be able to put a baby in ya.” Choking on your spit, removing your arms so you could quickly cough up a lung.

“What?” You half yelled, partially startling the quiet boy sitting on the floor. “My vasectomy doll,” You grumbled… so that’s what this was about? Why he’d been actin so weird.

“Toji,” you huffed out as you looked back at him, “You seriously wanna have to go back to using condoms just so you can put one baby in me?” You asked, a brow quirking up. A soft snicker leaving your lips before he cursed under his breath.

“Besides, I’d rather put my attention on Megumi right now,” You noted, causing Toji to nod. “Yeah besides my insurance ain’t gonna cover it and I’m not givin up what little luxury I have,” he huffed out, “See? You should stop worrying about it.”

And with that the vasectomy debacle was solved… at least for now. That man has crazy baby fever.

[jaysgirlx]

"Need help sweetheart?" Bookstore Customer!Jason Todd helps you reach the books on the higher shelves. You were his favorite employee and he wanted to make your day easier. He'd been coming here for a while but you always forgot how tall he was and how good his body felt pressed against yours. You only knew how to mumble out a couple words because you didn't know what else to say to a man like that. "Uh sir, you don't need to-"

"Please call me anything but sir sweetheart, you know I'm not new here"

Bookstore Customer!Jason enjoyed teasing his favorite employee aka you of course. He teases you about working at the bookstore even though he's constantly there and he'll always be flirting with you even if you're working the counter that day. He knows he's holding up the line but he's a paying customer so he doesn't care.

"How's my favorite pretty girl doing?"

"M'tired today Jay, I can't handle your nonsense right now"

"Okay that was mean- wait, Jay? that's a first"

"Buy a book or get out Jason"

You could easily tell Jason liked classics and poetry but for some reason he was willing to read your favorites even if they were a smut-filled mess. One time, he backed you up into a corner, after reading one of those books you liked, "Hmm, you like this kind of shit baby? cause I can do all that to you and so much more"

Over time, you learned that Jason also likes to follow you to the store, whispering to you about all the things he could do to you if you'd let him. His hand is always on your hips, pressing his body fully into you. He knows you like it especially when you roll your hips into his when nobody's looking. He wishes you'd use your words and just say you were his but he knew he wasn't even close to getting that, at least not yet.

Jason tried to buy a new book every week, sometimes not even to read. He needed an excuse to be there since your boss has never been fond of him ever since he had caught him feeling you up near the back shelves once. He learned his lesso so now he purposefully buys the books you like, just so he can watch you ramble on and on about them without getting kicked out of the store.

Bookstore Customer!Jason thrived on the feeling he got from watching you go from being so nonchalant around him to the most talkative girl in the world. he wants you comfortable if he's going to fuck you. You find yourself shutting up one time because you thought you had bored him but he quickly gets rid of that thought for you, "Keep talking sweetheart, I'm just wondering how pretty your mouth would look with my cock stuffed down your throat"

"Jay I don't- I can't- I haven't-"

"Don't worry, you will and I'm sure you're a fast learner"

It wasn't that hard for you to notice that Jason got a little jealous when his brother Dick hits on you the first and last time he brings him to the bookstore. Dick easily chats you up and Jason watches the two become a bit too friendly for his liking but it wasn't his place to speak, "Now I see why my little brother brings home so many books"

"It's good he does, I like guys who read"

"I actually quite the fan of classic literature-"

"Oh shut up Dick"

Bookstore Customer!Jason had all your coworkers wondering if you'll ever let the poor guy hit. They weren't sure if Jason was interested in you or your body, regardless they couldn't ignore the smile you got whenever he walk in. Or the way you'd laugh at his dumb jokes. You had him on a leash and you didn't even know what to do with him. He's begging to take you out or just even spent a night with you. He didn't just want you, he needed you. "C'mon I promise to take care of you princess, I'll even take you to that little coffee shop in Bludhaven"

"Who told you about that?!"

"…Dick"

When he finally manages to convince you to let him kiss you, you're nervous as fuck. You thought this was just another one of his antics but no, this was real. He'd promised to stop hitting on you if you felt nothing and you should've know it was bad idea when you could hear your own heartbeat still your let his lips touch yours. It was such a bad idea because before you knew it, he's got you pushed up against the wall, leg parting your thighs with your hands gripping at his shirt. "Jay, more please" Suddenly after all this time, you're pleading for him. Oh how the tables have turned. You're begging for all he's got, and you know he has so much more to give.

"Just give me a moment baby, got be patient" Within a matter of minutes your pants are discarded on the floor, and your panties are still on but being pushed aside while two fingers are being pumped in and out of your pussy. He's got one hand on your hips holding you down while one of your legs is wrapped around his waist. "Didn't I tell you I could do some much for you baby?"

You nod quickly while he's sucking on your poor neck, that would definitely be red all tomorrow. you feel his teeth sink into your skin, not too hard but rough enough to leave a mark. "Now keep quiet, I don't want any of your coworkers hearing us back here" The next thing you know you're cumming on the boy's fingers and he wants you to do it again. and again. and possibly 50 more times if you're willing.

The next time Jason comes, he's holding what you think is flowers and you know he'll be your victim today.

"So I thought real flowers would be cheesy and you'd probably not want to take care of em, so my brothers taught me how to make these paper flowers and…here just take them"

"Wow, I'm getting hand-crafted flowers from THE Jason Todd? Someone must have a really big crush on me huh? Are those bandaids on your fingers? Want me to kiss your boo-boos? "

"Are you going to finally go out with me or do I have to make you cum-"

"Yes yes! Just do not finish that sentence out loud"

"You are soooooooooo in love me"

"Jay, get out"