#maribat quotes

[raeuberprinzessin]

Dick, excitedly showing his newest little sister Marinette the Batcave: This is the Batcave! Overe there is the Batcomputer and here we sharpen our Batarangs. On this side are the Batbikes and if you follow this path you'll find the Batplane. And right here is the Batmobile! Isn't it amazing? We should totally take you on a joy ride with it, don't you agree? What do you say?

Marinette, slowly taking it all in: I feel like you were going for a theme with this ... Let me guess? Moody broody late-pubescent goth?

Alfred: Very well said, Miss Marinette.

Jason, peering at a stricken-looking Bruce: Well, I guess trying to show off how cool you are to your new daughter might not go as planned. Any contingencies, old man?

Tim: Going off of experience, it's having a moody brooding session in the dark cave. You know, like a late-pubescent goth.

Bruce, murmuring: I didn't even name most of these things, why am I getting attacked?

[mysticprofessoralienhumanoid]

Jason: Okay, let's go over this again. What do we do when something goes wrong?

Duke: We try to fix it before Marinette and/or Alfred get back.

Jason: And if that doesn't work?

Steph: We blame Bruce.

Jason: Good.

[batsandbugs]

Daminette School AU Quotes

Lila: You know Marinette, it’s such a shame no one likes you, you’re actually quite useful when you know your place.

Marinette: (sighing) Lila, the bar for civility is so low it’s practically a tripping hazard in hell, yet here you are, limbo dancing with the devil.

Lila: (smiling falsely) If you say something like that again, I’ll “trip” you out of that window you- What are you doing?

Marinette: (looking at the window) Checking how high the drop is, see if it’s worth it.

Damian: (sitting behind them on his phone, not looking up) Most humans can survive a two story fall, Dupain-Cheng. You’ll be fine.

Marinette: Aww, Lila wouldn’t make it then?

Lila: (fuming) Excuse me!?

Marinette: He said humans, and since you’ve clearly escaped from hell you’ll probably just shatter into a thousand pieces and reform there.

Damian: (under his breath) The devil doesn’t want her back.

[the-glass-is-actually-full]

Marinette: You're my partner, my best friend, and the love of my life. I hope you know I would do anything for you. Absolutely anything. Damian: I want you to get a full 10 hours of sleep. Marinette, conjuring up the sweetest smile and a glare that could throw anyone six-feet under: Absolutely and positively no.

[its-karma-bitches-00]

Damian: Don’t worry, I have a few knives up my sleeve. Jon: I think you mean cards. Marinette, watching Damian pulling knives out of his sleeves: No, he does not.

[monsteralikat19]

Marinette: Why is coming up with ideas so hard?

Jason: Creativity is a spring and sometimes the beavers say fuck you.

[unkownsimoperson]

Marinette: Alright, listen here you son of a b#itch-

Jason: How dare you insult mom like that!?

Marinette: ... I was talking about Bruce..

Jason: Fair. Continue.

Bruce: *pinches the bridge of his nose* Have kids, they said. It'll be fun, they said.

Sabine: *smiles smugly*

Dick: *trying to hold in his lafter, but fails miserably*

ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ sɴᴇᴀᴋ ᴘᴇᴀᴋ ᴀᴛ ᴀ ғɪᴄ ɪ'ᴍ ᴡʀɪᴛɪɴɢ (๑'ڡ'๑)

[the-coffee-fandom]

Dick: ….I know I asked but this is *not* what I meant

Marinette: *looks up* What did you expect?

Dick: Anything but this?

Marinette: This is normal actually. I’m surprised this is what freaks you out with all the people you have in the manor.

Dick: Yeah I guess…

Marinette: So you think this will work?

Dick: I rather you not sacrifice my little brother to demons actually.

Marinette: Untie him and I’ll make you regret it

Dick: Yes ma’am. Sorry baby bird.

Damian: *muffled incoherent growl and a glare*

Marinette: Good. Now how exactly do we ensure it’ll summon his girlfriend?

Dick: I have no clue.

Marinette: Winging it it is!

[san-fics]

[thornalchemist23]

Damian: Don't worry, I have a few knives up my sleeve. Marinette: I think you mean cards. Damian, pulling knives out of their sleeves: No, I do not.

[pooh-bear-paradise]

Damian: Ever try to put a mask on a horse? Marinette: Only on Batman Day.

[raeuberprinzessin]

Jason:

Alfred:

Jason:

Alfred: No.

Jason: But Alfie!

Alfred: No, Master Jason. You can't just go out and adopt a sad teenager.

Jason, clutching Marinette: But why not? How is this any different than what Bruce does?

Marrinette, muffled: I'm not sad, I'm stressed and overworked and haven't had a full night's sleep in ages.

Tim: Sounds like she's practically already one of us.

Bruce: She might have parents, Jason.

Jason: As if that has stopped you before!

Marinette, still muffled: Yep, I actually have parents.

Dick: She's pretty adorable.

Jason: Right?!

Afred: Master Richard, please!

Cass: *koala hugs Marinette from the other side and gives Bruce a long stare*

Damian, spoiling some of the kwamis: I have decided that she shall join the family.

Jason: See? Even the brat claimed her as family and he barely wanted Dick!

Marinette, sandwiched between Jason and Cass and trying to speak louder: Actually I'm only here because I really think we might need help against our Parisian villain.

Bruce: You're fighting a villain? I assume you're a sidekick? Who's your mentor?

Alfred, dangerously low: Master Bruce.

Marinette: Not a sidekick. Since our Mentor lost his memories and our temporary heroes got exposed it's just my partner and I.

Bruce:

Alfred:

Bruce: So-

Alfred: OH FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE!

[mysticprofessoralienhumanoid]

Dick, driving Marinette, Damian and M'ari: So, how was your day?

M'ari: We almost got surprise adopted!

Dick: What?

Damian: We almost got kidnapped.

Dick: Oh, okay.

Dick: *slams on the breaks* WAIT, WHAT?!

Marinette: But then the kidnappers looked at Damian and figured out it wouldn't be worth the trouble so they let us go.

Damian:*trying to figure out if that's a compliment or an insult*

[batsandbugs]

Incorrect Daminette Quotes

Ladybug: (vaulting behind a crate while an explosion occurs) Okay time for plan G.

Red Hood: Don’t you mean plan B?

Ladybug: We are well past plan B, we skipped over plan C due to Nightwing getting knocked unconscious.

Red Robin: What about plan D?

Ladybug: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago where Robin and I make out as a distraction.

Robin: (still sitting stunned in the corner muttering) She kissed me? She- she actually kissed…

Ladybug: And I’m not doing plan E, because that involves a level of property damage that I’m not okay with.

Red Hood: (readies an explosive) I’m prepared to make that sacrifice!

[the-glass-is-actually-full]

Marinette: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine. Damian: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again. Marinette: O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns?? Damian: Is it working?

[its-karma-bitches-00]

Marinette: You often use humor to deflect trauma Jason: Thank you Marinette: I didn't say that was a good thing Jason: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny