#maybe someday i'll get to read properly again

[stillfruit]

i love not knowing if i'll ever be healthy again i love all of the time i've used to move my body become nothing i love spending my adulthood wasting away year after year for various reasons baby!

[majorbaby]

commander pierce is a low point for MASH, my personal least favourite episode and here's why:

Regardless of your position on the framing, which i'll get to later, the writing is weak.

It sets Potter up as being a competent, strong leader and Hawkeye learn that being in charge of the base isn't as easy as it looks (which makes no sense for Hawkeye but again, I'll come to that) but then when we cut to Potter at the very important conference he's meant to be attending with some other army brass, we see them getting drunk and later on, just chilling together. He only gets up to leave said conference when he catches Radar's drift that the camp is falling apart without him - we're to assume he would've just continued fucking around until whenever he felt like returning.

These scenes align well with MASH's earlier anti-establishment beat, but it doesn't fit in this pro-establishment episode. Is Potter a responsible leader who is simply misunderstood by the rebellious, immature Hawkeye, or is Potter shirking his duties while the camp suffers? Both, it would seem.

I enjoy Margaret's little mock-salute to Hawkeye because 1) he wouldn't care to be properly saluted (except ?? this episode seems to want me to believe otherwise lol) 2) when are you ever going to see her do a mock-salute otherwise.

But here's the thing, I dislike when this show muddles Hawkeye's distaste for the military with Hawkeye's misogyny. Hawkeye can be anti-establishment and even give her (and other pro-army characters) a hard time without going so far as to sexually harass her. Frank Burns was invaluable as that other "pro-army character", taking the brunt of Hawkeye and Trapper's ire.

Speaking of Frank (affectionate), in addition to saluting him, Margaret adds mockingly, "If only Frank Burns could see you now". He can't, because this episode can't achieve its goal if Frank is there to either applaud Hawkeye's efforts or laugh as he struggles. It would kill the episode's suggestion to the audience that military leadership is admirable or desirable.

BJ's "I don't know Commander Pierce! And I don't know if I want to!" makes me roll my eyes hardcore. I'm not sure if he's annoyed at how Hawkeye is acting or if he's annoyed specifically that he's being a bad leader. Seems like a little bit of both, but my read on BJ based on how he's written thus far and going forward is that it's more likely his pride is hurt when Hawkeye yells at him.

On that note, I could maybe buy that because Hawkeye is so stressed out, he accuses BJ of trying to "play hero" but I don't genuinely believe that Hawkeye's opinion of BJ could be so low or that he doesn't see how BJ dropping everything to save a life isn't, as BJ says, exactly what Hawkeye would've done in his shoes. We've watched Hawkeye do that on multiple occasions.

Or at least if Hawkeye is to be upset at BJ, then let it be for a believable reason, like, hey, BJ, what about all these other patients that came in after you left (altho even then, Radar points out that BJ couldn't have known it would happen), hey BJ, we lost 10 other guys while you were out saving one.

Instead, incredibly, Hawkeye complains that BJ left him holding the bag, and later that he undermined his authority. Generally I'm left with the impression that Hawkeye is at least a little upset that BJ thinks he didn't do a good job as a CO, when Hawkeye didn't even care for the title "Chief Surgeon" at one point, which more accurately describes his role at the camp and could very well describe a role he might eventually have as a civilian someday. To say nothing of s03e03 Officer of the Day which is the episode you should watch if you want to see Hawkeye Pierce in charge instead of a guy who only looks like Hawkeye Pierce in charge.

I said I would come to the framing: it sucks! I guess if you want to see Hawkeye give a shit about having military authority, this episode is for you, but it's hard for me to imagine that any audience member was holding their breath waiting for it to happen.

[sprout-writes-stuff]

Inspired by @henderdads fic. A little thing that entered my brain fully formed and had to come out. (if I did anything wrong here let me know and I'll take it down)

It's not exactly what Steve thought he'd be doing on a friday night, he and Robin have their laptops open doing a personality quiz that the school heavily encouraged them to take.

He highly doubts a few questions (okay so there's at least 50, whatever) will tell him anything about himself that he didn't already know but Robin insisted they do it together. The part that actually interests Steve is they'll get a list of the ten people they're most compatible with, it'll even say whether that's in a romantic way or not. The last question asks about their preference (Men/Women/Any/None).

Early sunday morning Steve is lying in bed scrolling his emails and it's there! The results. He skims over all the stuff about him (he'll make a great parent someday, blah blah blah, maybe he'll read it properly later) until he finds the list. Unsurprisingly, Robin is at the top with 98.2% but the second... What? No way?

He video calls Robin immediately, it actually takes three tries to wake her up.

"Steve? It's," she looks up to the time on her phone, "7:18. Why? It's sunday."

"The email, Robin, it's here." He watches her face as she tries to understand what's happening, barely containing his amusement at that, and then waits as she checks hers.

"Aww we're compatible Stevie," she says with a silly, overly sweet smile, "like we didn't know that already. Who'd you get first with a heart?"

Steve now has his open on his laptop, staring at the little pink heart next the name second on his list.

"Steve?"

"It's... I mean, it can't be right."

"Why not? It got us didn't it?"

"It's Eddie Munson. 97.6%." The rest are all mid 80s or lower and might as well be zero for all Steve cares about them right now. Robin's jaw drops.

"He doesn't exactly seem the type to even take the quiz," she says, "you have to talk to him tomorrow."

"I don't know anything about him."

"Well you've got all the time in the world to find out."

He doesn't stop thinking about it for the rest of the day.

He sees Eddie's van pull into the parking lot and Robin pushes him towards it before the engine is even off.

"Can I talk to you?" he asks as soon as the door is open. "Privately?"

"Alright," Eddie says, confusion on his face as he follows Steve away from everyone else. "What's this about Harrington?"

"The quiz? The other night?" Did Eddie think Steve was just going to leave it?

"Oh, that's in already?" He digs his phone out of his pocket. He doesn't know.

Steve watches him read, getting more and more nervous as he gets closer to the end. Eddie looks up at him in shock. All Steve can do is nod.

"And the... heart? That's not a mistake?" He's kind of breathless.

"Huh?"

"Like, you could have accidentally checked men instead of women and that's what you came to tell me."

"Oh," Steve says with a giggle, "no, I'm bi."

The nervous energy from a few minutes ago is turning into bubbling excitement as they stare at each other, both with tentative, hopeful smiles.

"I don't know about you but I really wanna kiss you." Steve says, stepping closer. Eddie bridges the gap and their lips meet. Before they can get too into it, the school bell rings and they have to start heading to class.

"Can't believe we got each other at the top of our lists," Eddie says knocking his shoulder into Steve's.

"Hate to break it to you but you're number two on mine," Steve replies with a grin. Eddie stops walking for a few seconds and has to jog to catch up.

"Oh, of course, Buckley right?"

Steve nods, still grinning. "See you after class?" he asks when they get to his room.

"Definitely." Eddie kisses him again, a peck this time. Steve watches him leave and marvels at the fact a stupid piece of homework may have just changed his life forever.

[13tinysocks]

hey dude! What's up :)) been just a little since l've said something

Initially, this is me saying thank you and goodbye

This isn't supposed to be a weird pity story, so l'm so unbelievably sorry if it comes off that way, lol.

When I began reading your work, I was enamoured with fiction because of personal issues (as many usually are, honestly, I know I'm one of god knows how many people trying to run away from life for just a second with fanfics or media in general). I don't know if I will ever be able to communicate this properly, hell, this will even be unbelievable funny or dramatic but I need to get this across because it's coming from a genuine place. Your stories and work thus far has brought me comfort, immense heaps of it, and even still when I deal with things that feel out of reach or too much to actually face head on I find myself wandering back to syg or just your blog in general

I mean this, from my entire heart, thank you and thank Bee. A million times thank you, for making that one silly silly stupid piece of fanfiction, because oh my god it got me through some major stressful hardships within my life for the past 3 years.

I am leaving tumblr, however I’m aware I have submitted asks with my actual accounts before, so you'll likely be able to see they're still gonna be up. I'm just deleting tumblr the app instead of my account, but for other social platforms they will be deleted properly (such as quotev) so I won’t be indulging in much reading anymore when it comes to fanfics and such lol

I don't know if I'll come back, if I do I likely will not be back for long or to be as active as l've been because of the toll social media’s taken. So even as ridiculous as this feels, to tell someone I’m simply a fan of and barely truly know, that their fanfic of murderers and their love story with my self insert kept me pushing through a lot of tough days, I genuinely just had to.

I needed to thank both you and your partner for the work you've both put out. I still have that smiley pin I’d made, and I will cherish what you made quotev have been for me ( I literally found out about the website during early or late 2020 I can barely remember, then later found your fic, I was DEEP DIVING into that shit LMAO )

I hope whatever happens for you and bee in the future is only good, and I only will wish nothing but the best of luck with everything man.

feel free to post this (idk what it’s called but when you publicly reply lol) or not, as long as you read this it’ll mean lots to me !! >:))

your coolest weirdest ticci toby fan whose also named toby, 🐚 annon

I always struggle to convey gratefulness for messages like this and readership- especially repeated readership. My life would be different if it were not for comments and messages egging us on to keep writing from syg to ho1c. While it's easy to say that writing is solely out of passion for the craft there is also the drive to share something with others. Hearing those others loud or quiet as a favorite- does push us forward when we have no motivation or desire to work. That drive has made us closer as a couple, better thinkers, and a halfway decent writing team. I thank you and all the others who send us stuff even if it's shit post asks I never answer because I like having them in my inbox like a personal horde of platonic Valentine's. I like keeping the pieces you give me to myself sometimes. I know it may seem like I'm ignoring you but I find genuine comfort in these messages. That there are so many. That they are so varied. That we have reached beyond our shut-in existence to touch the lives of others.

I find myself wondering where an anon has gone when I do not hear from them in awhile. I wish them well. I wish them better standards than us.

Maybe we'll meet again someday space cowboy. If you're ever back in town feel free to shoot me (a message).

Thank you for reaching out. Thank you for reading. I wish you peace and love and good books.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #216

I finally was able to start assembling the music box in Audacity. Behold:

...If you're thinking it looks complicated, that's because... it kind of is. I've been at it since like 8am. I woke up at 7:30am (despite going to bed at around 2:30am) and my body immediately wanted out of bed for the sake of doing this, despite my best efforts to go back to sleep to get a full 8 hours. Oh well.

In my LMMS file, aside from the replicated vocals, there are two main lines of notes. I have rendered the top line into LMMS. I still have yet to fully render the second. The second is more complicated than the first, but I have up to measure 56 out of 239 done and squared away. It's 6:09pm at the time of writing this sentence, so I'll probably have to stop and do other things soon. It's not done yet, so I really don't wanna transition to a new activity, and as a result, the inside of my brain looks like this:

...That's all right though. I deal with that feeling... kind of a lot. I'm pretty good at weathering it by now.

At around 5:30, J wanted to go to the library in order to return some books, and he wanted me to tag along, so I did. As much as I don't like breaks, I probably needed one. I'm like you in that when I have my brain set on doing something, I'll end up going until my brain is fried if I'm not careful. I can't afford to get fried; the first of August is coming, and I want this done by then. I took a couple pictures in the library; I thought the windows were beautiful, so I wanted to show them to you:

Hey, Sephiroth? Maybe someday in some impossible future, we can go to some library and we can borrow a copy of The Neverending Story, by Michael Ende. I can read it out loud to you, if you'd like that. I can even do voices for the characters, if you'd like.

In any case, J had apparently signed me up for library pen pals. I guess I have a letter of my own now to respond to. I'm a little nervous; the person I received a letter from is an adult woman with two children, and she is probably very normal, whereas I am... kinda not. And my world is not very forgiving of "abnormal" unless you plop yourself into the right circles, and I'm not sure if this lady belongs to those circles.

I'm scared, but I'm gonna write back anyways. Her letter is handwritten, but I think I'll type mine; if I try to write it, the best my dyspraxic ass can manage is chicken scratch letters, or so I've been told by the various adults in my life.

...I wonder if that's actually true. I wonder if my handwriting really is horrendous. Well, I suppose you can be the judge of that once you receive the locket I made for you; I left a tiny handwritten note inside. I hope you'll like it.

...If you receive the locket I made for you, that is. I received good news, but... it might still not work out. I suppose we'll have to see.

I'm going to try. I owe so much to you. I have to try.

You might be relieved to know that I was mindful of my hydration and of my hunger today. I've been heeding my water alarms. And I ate a breakfast and a lunch. And I'm going to eat a dinner soon, too.

I wanna keep going with the music box today, but if I don't manage myself properly, I'm not gonna be able to do anything tomorrow. So I think I'll stop for now, even though I don't really want to. I gotta eat something anyways.

Sephiroth... please stay safe out there. Please make kind, good, gentle, and loving choices. I love you. And I'll write to you again tomorrow.

Your friend, Lumine

[brandwhorestarscream]

Lockprowl ask

I had suggested IDW lockprowl, because I saw an interesting fanart about them

It has been a looong time since I read IDW and I'll be completely honest: I had no recollection of IDW Lockdown and had to look him up to refresh my memory on his design. Do I remember his personality at all? No. Is he still a husky voiced bounty hunter in my heart? Yes

I'm gonna recycle an old concept here, and say that Prowl is actually the one that gets sparked first. Maybe they're actually a couple and this is a schmoopy alternate timeline where all is well and they're happily living together, married and content. Maybe it's like canon and they have a very on again, off again relationship.

Regardless. Prowl is the one who's sparked, and there's immediately worry of the baby growing too big for him to safely birth. This wasn't planned at all, and situations where the carrier's frame is too small can quickly turn lethal. Prowl in a slight panic immediately jumps to termination, but Lockdown suggests an alternative: a transplant. There's no way the bitty's size could be too big for him, and, well. He's not averse to the idea of being a parent with Prowl.

They caught the carrying cycle early so the transfer would be swift and painless. The earlier a baby spark is moved, the better, generally. Prowl consents to the operation, and they get scheduled right away. Thankfully, it all goes extremely well: the newspark anchors to Lockdown with barely a flicker, and his carrying protocols online to begin preparing to begin designing and constructing their sparkling's body.

Prowl is... not quite anxious, about being a sire. Worried, maybe? Weary? Bracing for impact? No, he's more like... apprehensive. Yes, that's the word he'd use to describe himself. He's apprehensive about parenthood. After all, having a baby is practically a full time job. They need a lot of care, around the clock. They're so fragile and so easily impressionable: one seemingly tiny, inconsequential mistake could follow them for the rest of their lives and shape what kind of person they could become. They need constant love and attention smd supervision, and they're both so busy. Perhaps it's pessimistic but he's approaching this with shrewd realism: as it stands now neither of them are ready to properly care for a sparkling. They're making a baby, an entire person. Someone that will someday be a fully fledged adult with a functioning psyche that they are responsible for sculpting. If they mess this up they could make the worst serial killer the world has ever seen, so they need to get their act together and be perfect parents.

He becomes... idk. Is there a word for like a groomzilla but for expectant parents? Because he's like that. Super anal about everything, down to the tiniest detail. Everything they buy from blankets to cradles to pacifiers goes through rigorous investigation, he reads instruction manuals and manufacturing info cover to cover, and he is extremely strict while choosing everything. He's already making a road map they'll need to follow to put their kid on a path to proper adulthood: they'll need to make sure they build the little one's confidence with children's groups early on, and make sure they are always readily available for the first several years or else the baby could develop attachment issues. They'll need the kid to be learning their glyphs by X age, and to be able to count by the time they're Y. He's narrowed down a list of acceptable schools for every age range, as well as researched the possibility of homeschooling just in case the public and private education institutions don't live up to his high standards. He spends a 20 hour period doing nothing but reading every recent study on sparkling psychology he can find, and he's already reserved a private room at the best hospital Cybertron has roughly around the due date.

Lockdown is honestly shellshocked. He gives me the vibes of an old fashioned, small town or perhaps country mom: as long as his kid is well fed and isn't bleeding and has a smile on their face, he knows he's doing alright. He'd definitely have a more hands off approach to parenting, letting their baby explore and make choices for himself. Isn't that enough to build confidence? Prowl rebukes him saying they're going to responsible for a living person, and they owe it to their sparkling to give them the best possible life. They're making the decision to bring them into this world, a decision that the baby has no say in, so they should at the very least give them the best possible chance to succeed and live an easy life.

To keep him busy, Lockdown let's Prowl take the reins on the majority of the prep. If he wants a fancy stroller without a certain strain of plastic in it, that's fine. If he wants to flip through hover cradle FAQs til his optics cross to find the most perfect one, so be it. It keeps him busy, and Lockdown honestly doesn't care about make or models or even color schemes. He's not too fussed about what they get, so long as baby is happy and healthy.

When the big day comes, Prowl thought he was prepared. He had everything squared away, had prepared extra energon and an overnight bag for the hospital and had transport on standby. He'd gone over his checklist every day since they enter the last few decacycles leading up to the due date.

But then Lockdown starts having contractions and he fucking blue screens. He's been running his systems so high strung and stressed that when the actual trigger happens, his processor crashes. Like actually crashes. Lockdown just grunts and presses a servo into his belly, gritting his denta and saying, "Yeah, it's time for the hospital, darlin'." and Proel gives him that standard deer in headlights look, optics flashing brighter than they ever had and something audibly pops in his helm. His lights go out and he drops like a sack of flour, smoking a tiny bit, and Lockdoen sighs. Rolls his optics, picks Prowl up under his arm, and heads to the hospital on his own.

Prowl comes to about half a megacycle later, once they've already been checked in lmfao. He's such a mess, he'd be drenched in sweat if he was human, and Lockdown nor Ratchet have ever seen him this flustered. Ratchet is delivering because Prowl insisted: there's no one better to do the job, and he'll trust no one but the autobot's CMO. Primus knows Ratchet is the only person Prowl would trust to save his life in a dire situation, he's the only one that Prowl trusts to safely deliver their sparkling.

He's pacing all over the delivery room, going over his checklist and feverishly looking through their hospital bag, so grateful that Lockdown grabbed it. He apologizes profusely for fainting like that, but his partner isn't fussed about it. At this point the contractions aren't painful, just a bit uncomfortable, and Lockdown switches between laying in the berth watching TV and doing laps around the room with his mate for several hours. It's his first sparkling, after all: it's going to take a long time before the sparkling is in the right position and his body is actually ready to deliver. It's a rather long labor, thankfully uncomplicated, but they're at the hospital for about 15 hours before they actually get to a point where they can start pushing.

Prowl, thankfully, doesn't pass out again, but has no idea what to do with himself while the medical team is setting up the stirrups and taking measurements and telling Lockdown to get ready to push. He's not sure if he should stand with his partner and hold his servo or if he should stand behind the doctors and watch firsthand as his sparkling is born. In the end, he does both, standing parallel to the berth with his left servo holding Lockdown's, the other peering over the privacy screen and watching the very moment their sparkling is born. Lockdown handles his labor like a champion, pushing out an exceptionally chunky sparkling in less than 15 minutes.

Their son is a big, round little marshmallow, black and white with a set of little green horns and huge blue optics. He's healthy and strong, latching onto his carrier's fuel lines without issue. Prowl is mesmerized by him, he's so proud in that moment, and Lockdown is on cloud nine cradling their newborn. He's so cute. So round and warm and snuggly, he never wants to put him down. Prowl's plans have all gone out the window--yes, he even had strict plans for post-emergence bonding--but he's lowkey short circuiting. He looks so tiny being held in his carrier's arms, and there's not a coherent thought in his head while he watches his son, mystified. The first time he holds him, he nearly crashes again. It's a good thing he's sitting down 🤭 the baby happily snuggles against him, content and starting to blindly suckle at his chassis in soft, wet kisses searching for more fuel. Prowl hasn't cried a day in his life but he gets damn close in that moment, and immediately turns to Lockdown to utter a heartfelt, whispered, "Thank you, for giving us this miracle."

[lilflowerpot]

What an entire fucking mood, chasing the serotonin high of one particular fixation and absolutely nothing else until it wears off... at which point I have already become an immobile heap on the floor, drained of my passion and energy. And while yes questions about my stories or worldbuilding fuel me to think up answers for them, I too cannot force myself to answer in detail a topic that I am uninterested in. That's just how it is.

And eyup t'was me! Surprise! I've been lurking for A While now.

And I just like the... the one-ness with nature, that sort of reciprocal relationship that the Eiyyka’an religion dictates— I just love it when there's not a harsh line drawn between a people and nature. I like to read about such cultures, and I sure as hell love creating them. The jungles, the planet sustained you, and you would nourish it in return upon death. I also love the little tidbits that make the concept feel more full: the aristocrats and their owned land, the controversies arising from some circumstances because there's no way a culture or a collection of cultures would be entirely without conflicting beliefs and needs. So there's a... requirement? for places that produce food to label or mark whether their food was cultivated on a burial site. I like that sort of little thing that arises from building a unique culture. You did such a great job! Launching your dead straight into the heart of a star... what a fucking metal way to go. I can definitely believe that the Galra ancestors would have done it if they had the means to do so.

And I have indeed seen the punnett square post, even though the numbers made my head spin quite a bit (which is no fault of yours, I uh, I just have no sense of scale nor numbers unfortunately, someone could tell me “that's 100ft long” and I would be unable to envision the size of the object they're describing) and I will let you know that I found the subject matter deeply deeply fascinating!

My spoons keep being used up these days by all the too-ambitious odd projects big and small I've been taking up, I made good progress on my ongoing project series of character design sheets, though I haven't been able to write properly for a while now. I'll... get to it. Some day. Maybe I'll show you my stuff someday as well, and I assure you that reading Little Blade is still on my to-do list.

I hope you're having a nice day!

— the worldbuilding enthusiast

[1][2][3]

Hello again my darling! Evidently it took me a while to answer this one because I was, as you so eloquently termed it, "chasing the serotonin high of one particular fixation (TotK) and absolutely nothing else until it [wore] off," and now here we are.

The Eiyyka’an faith is near and dear to my heart because it just naturally wrote itself into something so gentle that I couldn't help but fall in love with it ♡ I myself have always been one for those sorts of cyclical, balanced relationships with the world, and it simply felt right to me that those who lived in the lushest most verdant areas of Daibazaal would consider it a profound blessing, and as such would want to give back as and when they could. And I'm pleased you feel I've done a good job regarding the little conflicts and controversies of Imperial culture, because as you say it wouldn't feel realistic for everyone to agree on everything—particularly in a people so numerous and widespread as the galra!

Nono you're absolutely valid in saying the punnet square numbers made your head spin (they certainly did mine), the human brain really isn't cut out to envision quantities on the scale we're talking for Imperial population 😅

Ah, the ol' spoon deficit,,,, believe me sweetheart, I've been there, but I'm glad to hear your personal projects are going well! I wish you the best of luck, love!!

[yanderemeganekko]

Tag game thing because why not

Oh man, I think this is like, my whopping third or fourth original post made this year. I sometimes forget my presence here is noted by anyone because of how little I post haha- so thanks for @houkagokappa for tagging me :)

Tag 9 an amount of people you'd like to get to know better

3 ships: Gosh, the only thing I've properly shipped in the last good while has been OCs I've been making in a friend group with my boyfriend, so I have to dig pretty hard for this one. The latest one that pops to mind would probably be KazuScara. Maybe also Neuvillette/Wriothesley? I don't even know their ship names yet but it's been growing on me. And for good measure I gotta throw in KilluGon as a good oldie, that one is always gonna own my heart.

First ship ever: Sora/Riku, no joke. If I had any ships from before then I have no idea, since KH was one of the first things I got into when I got online as a wee 9(?)-year-old... would you believe me if I told you I never finished the game LOL (I promise I will someday).

Last song: Animal by Deco*27. I was working on a project earlier and wanted something lighthearted to listen to.

Last movie: I'm so terrible about watching movies, this one might actually be the first Spiderverse movie from last year. I meant to go watch a bunch of movies this summer, but then life happened, so...

Currently reading: Manga-wise, Hikaru ga shinda natsu, which I've been enjoying a ton. I've also tried to get into reading books again (with pretty middling results), so I got myself a collection of Holmes stories, and a Lovecraft collection, both which I've started.

Currently watching: Finally watching Ancient Magus Bride with some friends! I just haven't felt an itch for seasonal anime, or anime in general lately, although we did recently finish Psycho Pass with my boyfriend (I've already seen it, I just needed to show him because I knew he would enjoy it).

Currently consuming: Media, or food? If it's food, currently nothing, although I did make a (pretty wet) blueberry pie and gingerbread cookies for independence day.

Currently craving: Time with family, and a home-cooked meal made by someone else. Due to some pretty grim circumstance I'm not spending today with my family, and it's unlikely that will be the case for end-of-the-year holidays either. I've been really jealous of seeing everyone my age and even older get to be with their parents, especially since mine are all I have, family-wise... but I can't blame my misfortune on others, so I just try to make do and enjoy my time with friends.

I can't think of terribly many mutuals of mine (sorry if I forgot about you, I promise it's not you it's me) but off the top of my head, I'll just tag @spoofenshmirtz, @komaeeda and @lonery-w.

[jadeile-writes]

Fanfic Progress Update 161

So, Hazbin Hotel was effing NOICE :D Didn't inspire me to write so far, but we'll see how this brainrot progresses. Currently I'm at the stage where I watch the musical parts 15 million times a day, the next stage is usually reading fanfics written by others, and the next one is writing if I fail to find what I'm looking for or just feel like it. Again, we'll see. On other news, stay tuned for the last sneak-peek for A Sign that you're important at the bottom of this post!

Current WIPs:

A Sign that you're important

Fandom: Sonic the Hedgehog, movieverse

Summary: One month upon his assigment as Doctor Robotnik's assitant, Agent Stone is told to learn sign language. He doesn't know why, and isn't suicidal enough to ask, so he simply rolls with it. Turns out, it's not just a whimsy of the eccentric doctor, even though that doesn't stop the doctor from utilizing it like one.

Progress: Chapter 5 was posted on 18th of January. The last chapter will be posted on 25th of January aka the next Thursday. Chapter 6 is a bit over halfway written, so cutting it a little close here, but I'll get it done in time. The biggest problem will be the chapter title tbh. I have a placeholder title (the old title for chapter 5 actually), but it's not perfect, so I'll need to brainstorm at some point, which is hopefully not on Thursday right as I'm posting it XD;

-----

Labor with a side of lattes (formerly known as "Life at the laboratory". Now the title isn't as boring and also vibes properly with the title of next part of the series)

Fandom: Sonic the Hedgehog, movieverse

Summary:

"Wanted: a yesman who is capable of operating an espresso machine, has at least a higher IQ than your average amoeba, and is willing to put work before having a personal life, or indeed a life, period. The extra in your pathetic paycheck is good, but the strain in your psyche will make up for the positives. Forfeit your basic human rights and apply today if this sounds like you." 

Maybe it said something about Agent Stone - and probably not good things - that the poster in the cafeteria's pin board piqued his interest more than any of his official assignments had for a good long while. 

Dr. Robotnik, huh?

Progress: This one will be part one of a two-parter longfic, the first part probably... 10-ish chapters? It's a bit hard to estimate at this point, so the number is subject to change - will probably end up being increased tbh. My weekly writing hour (as in, a specific hour when I sit down and write, no excuses [other than not being home]) is devoted to this fic.

I have the first five chapters done. Chapter 6 is 1/3 written.

I also have two halfway written chapters that don't yet know their exact placement within the fic (they're scenes that will be slotted in to wherever they feel natural, once the fic is ready for them.)

-----  

Other WIPs I’m not currently working on but intend to get back to Someday™:

PoE Drabbles (Pillars of Eternity)

DC Drabbles (Justice League)

Diaphanous Relations (Forgotten Realms, R.A. Salvatore’s books)

Rolling with it (Zelda: BotW)

Hah, our afterlife is the most hilarious bushwa, dearest! (Hazbin Hotel)

-----

That’s it for the WIPs! Here’s the promised sneak-peek into A Sign that you're important (Note: the text may end up slightly different in the fic itself due to more editing happening before publishing). Enjoy!

Maybe it would have been better if he had never been able to talk with Knuckles. He could have just dropped the renegade red rascal at the hedgehog’s home to do whatever it was he had assumed Knuckles wanted – he had assumed punching, ripping some quills, and moving on, if he had had to hazard a guess when he had been unable to hear – and been none the wiser about the Master Emerald. He could have been content about the hedgehog getting some much deserved use as a punching bag and moved on with his own plans. Getting to Stone, kissing him silly, freshening up, eating actual food, getting a good night’s sleep in an actual bed (preferably with Stone in it), getting acquaintanced with the cafe lab, and making plans for further actions in the morning. Plans that likely would have involved checking up on the hedgehog to see if there was anything left to salvage in the wreck for science, and whether further revenge was necessary. Getting to his secret lab. Considering negotiations for his re-employment with the government – he had done nothing wrong, he had been acting on their orders to find out what had caused the blackout and he had been given the leave to deal with it in any way he deemed necessary.

-----

That’s it this time. See you next Saturday!

Links:

My AO3   My FFnet   My Ko-fi    Radiohusk Discord Server

[ren-ya]

I finally made a reference for a One Piece OC I made recently, her name's Ren! (Full name Aston Hydrangea Ren) (I love mouthful names) There's more about her under the cut! (it's very rambly btw)

She's 24 and is the user of the Magic Magic Fruit/Maho Maho no Mi! She's just a magical girl but in One Piece, I guess. Think Precure or Tokyo Mew Mew, I guess. The design to the right is her magical girl form. She can summon weapons and fight with them, and do those really glittery attacks that make no sense irl. But she has a limited amount of energy she can use before she passes out. Attacking, summoning and transforming take some of that energy out of her. I don't know if this makes any sense, it makes more sense in my head.

Here's some info about her :D

Her birthday is March 4th.

She loves writing poems, and has been writing in the same notebook since she was 17. That thing has seen everything.

She's been sailing the seas since she was 15, and it wasn't until her 20's that she found a crew to be on. It's the Heart Pirates, of course. She was originally made for the purpose of oc x canon stuff with Law. Help.

She has a little brother, Aston Rosebay Seppo, is 18 (post-timeskip). His dream as a little kid was to become a Marine, maybe they'll meet again someday.

She has a bounty on her head, but it's nothing too crazy. It's relatively low, and she only has it because she beat up a few Marines that tried to help her when she was in a lot of shock and couldn't process anything properly. She felt threatened and beat 3 up before dipping.

She's been through a lot, but she still tries to be positive and friendly. Of course, she doesn't take shit from anyone and if someone over steps her boundaries they WILL know. But overall, she just wants to be happy and free :)

Idk, I like her. She's fun to draw and I like making all my characters overpowered girlbosses. I have like, 3 other op ocs I want to make refs for but I need to get Ren and Law out of my system asap. I feel like I'm goinf crazy over both of them. Expect ship art of them soon I guess? We'll see.

But sorry about the rambling, thank you if you've read any of it. I can't infodump to anyone irl so I'll scream into the void. But anyways, peace out.

[dzpenumbra]

5/26/23

Oh geez, spaced out and lost track of time. It's 4:30 again.

Today I had therapy. I brought up all the shit I've been mulling over, and the panic moment I dealt with in last night's journal. He was happy to hear of my improvement in my ability to deal with those panic moments. They're definitely a lot harder to deal with when you're stoned... much more immersive and convincing... so at least I have that going for me in dealing with stupid trauma shit being set off by ghosts of my past popping back into my life.

I worked on the skull a bit today. A bit of a shift. I started to ink it, using tattoo ink. I'm hoping that was a good idea, that shit stains like a bastard. I was a little worried about it... not soaking into the bone. I have no idea if it will properly dye the bone or not. But I did it and I'm going to leave it overnight and see how it comes out. I just did some thick outlines around the eye sockets and lines connecting the eye sockets to the nasal cavity. Then I started doing pencil. I did a circle spot in the center top of the skull to leave blank, with about an 1/4" outline to it. Then... I was planning to do this organic bubble style abstract work, like what I've been doing in my sketchbook. So I decided to go with the design that drew attention to a specific spot the best - the one with small bubbles in the center that grow in size as they radiate out. That should create a pattern on the top of the skull that draws focus to the center, which I'll figure out when I get to it.

I was worried about the ink because I found some on the edge of my finger. And... if I smudge it? That's permanent. There's no "undoing" ink smudges. So yeah... I'm hoping I picked the right medium for this. Again... I guess we'll see tomorrow. But I'm definitely pretty committed here, because mixing different kinds of black ink rarely gives a good look, especially over time. There are lots of ways to make black ink, usually they're super dark blue, green or purple. You'll notice this when they fade, if you've ever gotten a tattoo, you know exactly what I'm talking about. So... mixing inks can give an unintended look over time.

However... it just occurred to me that... if this ink doesn't thoroughly stain... I might have a trick up my sleeve for removal. In the tattoo shop, we used to use isopropyl alcohol to remove tattoo ink from surfaces and to deal with spills and shit, and it actually worked pretty well. And I do have some sitting around. Good to have backup plans.

Since it's already late, I'm gonna take a pee break and then do tarot.

Same as last time, blind reading, 3-card spread, Past/Present/Future.

First Position - Past - Seven of Swords (Hidden dishonor, guilt, deception, manipulation.) Second Position - Present - Nine of Wands (Defense, guarding yourself. Suspicion, self-protection.  Need rest and recovery.) Third Position - Future - Ace of Cups (A new relationship and the accompanying surge of emotions.  Getting in touch with your feelings.  Matters of the heart.  A deepening bond.)

Alright, this one is interesting. Two cards I've never gotten before. Seven of Swords is a spooky one. But I think I get it. It's actually something that, despite how much I share on here, I'm not going to share. We all have our limits, I guess. And maybe I'll get to sharing it someday... So... the Past thread is... something from my past that I regret, that I'm ashamed of. And that thread has led to my Present state... being the Wounded Soldier... tired and beaten, guarded, defensive, suspicious, needing to heal. Super accurate. And where that thread is likely to lead? A likely future? A new connection, a new relationship, social and emotional growth. Which, I have to say... has already happened in a lot of ways.

I see the linear connection between all three, but what I am struggling with is... how? How do I go from the Nine of Wands to the Ace of Cups? What catalyzes it? What is my role in that? Maybe it's as simple as... resolving the Nine of Wands? Healing? Recovering? Growing past that state?

That's an interesting thought. Like... can I heal and stop being the wounded lonely suspicious hermit... without others?

That's what's catching me here... the Ace of Cups is a social card, right? I mean... not entirely, but like... it seems mostly symbolic of the massive burst of emotions you get from a new relationship, most of the cups are about emotions and relationship stuff. And relationships require other people... (duh) So it feels like I'm waiting on another person to break me free of this. But... is it possible that the Ace of Cups is sorta... my burst of emotions when I free myself from the prison I'm in? When I heal enough to be vulnerable with the world, and submit myself to its judgement?

And... Ace of Cups does not guarantee a happy ending, rather... it's crucially a beginning card. Ten of Cups is more of the happy ending card. So... it doesn't really indicate that the big emotion surge is going to go well, in a lot of ways it indicates that it's happening in the context of inexperience. But hey, that's not all doom and gloom. What's more memorable than a first date? The first time you have your significant other for dinner at your house for your first official date, and you kiss on the futon for the first time. 2009 and I remember it like it was yesterday. Inexperience means new and exciting. I really need to allow myself to be open to that.

So... the part I'm skipping over here, that's related through the common thread... is the Seven of Swords. The regret and guilt and shame. And that's really the key. The Seven of Swords is the reason I'm stuck in Nine of Wands... and being able to move forward from that can likely bring me to Ace of Cups. That's what I'm getting from this. And that would imply that the way to evolve forward is by finding peace with the Seven of Swords stuff. Being able to live with it, without it being a Dr. House limp, attitude and pill bottle.

Alright, that all makes sense. And... the sun's up. So... I'm off to bed.

[foggyparadisecandy]

Tumblr Banning and Labelling

Last week, I made a somewhat snarky comment about how one of my stories - a pure text piece - was slapped with a giant warning by the Tumblr bots or moderators.

My position is that I don't need the warning - I agree that my stuff should be labelled with Mature Content warning and usually the Sexual Content sub-label.

I'm fine with that.

I 100% don't want people to inappropriately stumble across my trances or stories and be offended.

In fact, I wish there was a button that allowed all my posts to be flagged automatically that way so I don't need to remember to do it.

Because maybe I unintentionally and inadvertently posted my CAMPING STORY - admittedly horny and erotic and, yes, filthy, story - without the Mature Content tag. And I concede that I need to start using the Sexual Content tag and have started doing so.

But it put a chill in the air for me.

First, the fucking label (see image above) still persists when I look through my own blog. As if I disagree or something, and they are saying "we're watching you, buddy".

No, officer, no need. I was speeding and didn't mean to. Thanks for letting me know. I AGREE WITH THE LABELS.

Where's the button to "Accept this Label" so we can all move on?

Side note: I have no fucking idea what Mature Content is if it's not sexual. Like ... what are we talking about? Articles about dentures and retirement homes as "Mature Content"? Or is it just naughty words and not sexual scenes?

But then I saw another blog get taken down in the last week for violating standards of Tumblr. Now, I'm not going to name names here - I'm not a fan of the guy who was taken down and he has, at best, a mixed reputation in the hypnokink community - but the truth is ... his blog was not that offensive and most of his stuff was also labeled with the Mature Label.

I've read the new community policy multiple times. It basically says "label your shit and you will be ok".

Meanwhile, I see the filthiest porn WITHOUT ANY LABELS on my feed daily. Surely, I'm not alone in this?

Now I have no idea exactly why his blog was nuked - maybe it was adult material not being labeled properly? Maybe it was unauthorized use of copyright images? Who knows - apparently he was blanked with no warning. Again ... I don't know if that is truthful or not but it still is worrisome from a completely selfish standpoint.

Why am I writing content here if someday, on a whim, some bot or moderator will blank out my blog? I would hope that I could get a warning to fix the offending things - and I would do so happily as I am never intentionally looking to upset people. It's not my nature.

And tbh, it would bother me to lose Tumblr.

I keep a backup of every trance and article that I write because of historical purges but ... I really love connecting with all you here on Tumblr.

I chat regularly with a bunch of you and love our fun (and often horny) conversations! I feel connected with so many of you and it gives me a feeling of community.

Will I wake up some day and find that my blog is gone and I'm persona non-grata in the Tumblr-o-sphere?

My guess? Yes.

Hypnokink is already a thinly tolerated niche fetish and sexual stuff scares away the big advertisers and credit card companies.

Is Tumblr at fault for wanting to pay for their servers and people and other expenses? I don't think so. I certainly don't blame them for the labels and concern.

Again: I APPLAUD THE LABELS AND FEEL THE COMMUNITY SHOULD SELF-POLICE SO WE DON'T HAVE OUTSIDERS DOING IT.

But what's my personal path forward? I'm not sure but I think I need to investigate other homes for my materials.

I'll still post here to Tumblr ... until that day when you see ol' Foggy's blog has been nuked by the powers that be.

But I'm taking suggestions.

I know I'm not the only one who thinks about these things. Reddit? Literotica?

Would any of you bother to set up an account on another platform just to read my nonsense? I certainly wouldn't expect it nor ask it of you.

But I would love to stay connected with most of you if Tumblr nuked my blog. Maybe that's a dumb thing to hope for but it's authentic.

Bottomline:

I love you all and hope we can continue to connect here.

I worry about the future and finding my blog shut off with no warning or discussion or chance to fix the problems.

I am a planner so I would love ideas from folks who face the same concerns.

[flambeaufelid]

Warrior Cats Chronological Liveblogging Masterpost

Edit: this project is no longer active. :/ hope to get back to it someday, but my hopes aren't high.

Hello, and welcome to my attempt to read through all of Erin Hunter's "Warrior's" (AKA "Warrior Cats") books, in the order shown here. I've previously read basically everything released before the third Dawn of the Clans book, so ~half of these wont be blind reactions, though it's been so long since I read these that I don't remember a lot of them well. Still, understand that this blog will often contain spoilers for books other than the one a post is about, as I reference future material!

Dawn of the clans:

The Sun Trail:

Prologue and chapter 1

...And that's all for now. Hit keep reading if you wanna hear why I'm doing any of this though.

Warrior cats means a lot to me.

Growing up, I had a strange relationship with reading. Until I turned about five and really tried to read a book for the first time, I was convinced that I hated reading. Then once I'd tried it, I loved it, but was convinced that I'd only be able to understand kids books or manga.

Of course, I was wrong. I was more capable than I thought. But bigger, more serious books... they were strangely intimidating to me.

So. One day, me and my sister are at swimming lessons, but there's enough of an age gap that we weren't in the same class. We'd both have to wait like half an hour for each other to be done.

I had made the mistake of not bringing anything to do. But my sister had.

Warriors books. But specifically, the manga.

Warriors having manga spinoffs is one of the weirdest marketing gimmicks ever, but it worked very well on me. A more traditional book might have scared me off.

With no other options, I picked up- if I remember correctly- Tigerstar Sasha book three.

For the record, this is an absolutely CURSED way to get into these books. It was so far disconnected from the main series that it was practically it's own thing. Not to mention it was the finale of this little spin-off.

Still, it was mildly entertaining.

And then a kitten fucking drowns.

That's fine. After all, there's no way they would really kill off a literal kitten. I continued reading.

But it never showed up again.

I reached the end of the book. Kitten still dead.

I leaned back on the uncomfortable poolside bench, mind fucking reeling. It was the most brutal thing I'd ever read. I felt a little sick to my stomach.

But, oh how I wanted more.

I proceeded to read every Warriors manga my sister had brought. Then every manga my library had.

This continued to be a cursed way to read this stuff. The clans are portrayed as distant, ambiguously villainous, and almost irrelevant. The characters the manga feature are fucking bizarre. They occasionally do weird things to the cannon.

But I loved it all. I wanted more.

But I didn't get more. I ran out.

There was no other option. If I wanted to read more Warriors, I'd have to read the books.

...I didn't start with the first one. But I got to it eventually. I got to them all.

I credit Warriors with making me truly love reading. It's a debt I cannot repay. The Erins are responsible for making me the person that I am today.

So it's a shame that. Uh. The books are...

....................not always very good.

In fact, Warriors kinda sucks sometimes. It's worldbuilding is nonsense, it's characters are idiots, and the books are so repetitive that there are tons of scenes you could take out of context, remove the names from, and then show me... And I'd have trouble telling you what arc they were from, much less what specific book.

I've tried to do this whole "read Warriors chronologically" like five times. I don't think I've ever gotten past sun trail.

The hope is that if I make this blog, maybe I'll be able to keep with it enough to get properly re-invested. Not to mention that one of my motivations for wanting to get back into the series is the distant idea that I'll write some fanfic- so, these posts can act as notes about things I found interesting, that I can possibly refer back to.

Also, I've heard some fucking crazy shit about the newer books I've not read. I so desperately want to know the details.

It's a long road I walk now.

[arlecchno]

oh good lord , h i hope you know what youve gotten yourself into by asking for the fic … [insert evil laughter here] okay okay now actually , the fic series doesnt focus on serial killers it was just that one fic in the series , but the serial killer fic is Blind Mirror (linked) by StrangeDiamond on Ao3 !!!! i have the print copies of the series (behold my collection) i think i also have to mention that its not an xreader fic lol

songs of resistance isnt part of the series but yaknow whatever . the ragnvindr brothers are a passion of mine and theyre my favorites i love them so much SHIDJSKDKD AND WHILE WERE ON THE TOPIC OF FIC RECS if you just so happen to have my horrid taste in men (/hj ?????) and like alhaitham , heres another one of my absolute favorite fics , i just call it Summers Fic (i hope these links are working properly lmao) and its got our favorites !!! murder / crimes , slowburn , (kinda) enemies to lovers (i fucking love the banter the author writes between mc and haitham) , + forensics stuff !! which is totally my jam because im a stupid little science gremlin .

you saying my board looks cool is so funny to me because like its a literal stock image , and while i couldve gone without it , low quality stock images just make me giggle for no reason so .. its also a little surprising you think its detailed because when i was making it i felt like i had to condense so much information for textbox space😭😭

i actually do a handful of things in the arts department , ive written my own little short stories and poems , and every once in a blue moon (when i have enough motivation) i make games ! granted theyre not very good , because im pretty sure im jackshit at characterization LOL heres a silly authors note i put in one of my short story docs just cuz why not honestly

also , YES I AM A DAIN LOVER IM ACTUALLY HIS BOYFRIEND (REAL) /j . all the khaenriah boys in general are my little sillies (i say as if they arent older than me) SO IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK ABOUT DAIN WITH MY MESSAGES ARE OPEN (and i am more than willing to spout theorist nonsense about him and the other khaenriahn boys as well)

also you absolutely do not have to worry about your wording of anything , none of it came off negatively at all ! i think youre very nice lmao

heres a little question to end off because im running out of creative ways to signoff , do you kin anyone from genshin ?

hoping the images dont glitch out ,

- jellyfish

OHHH WAIT i think i've heard of that kaeya and diluc novel thingy??? i'm pretty sure i've seen them around twitter or tiktok some time ago and omg i should check them out then!!! those covers look so good maybe i'll actually get around with the whole series now that you've mentioned it

and omg that summers fic you just linked is already so amazing. you've captured my taste in genshin men perfectly (i say as i drool over alhaitham). i just finished with the first chapter and the author have really captured my heart with the bits of forensics and crime, adding on with the tinge of arab culture too!!! i'm gonna go ahead and read them when i have the time hehe

you do short stories... poems... AND GAMES???? hello am i seeing this right

(p/s: i low-key do those kinds of a/n in my google docs draft for ma too... but they just never made it to the finalized version 😔)

and actually dain is in bed with me rn idk what you're talking about 🙄🙄🙄 /j

me personally i am very interested in khaenriah lore but i really haven't gotten to it (tbh the overall lore of the game is a lot to take in) but i probably will someday,, if i am not lazy /hj

and honestly... i don't exactly know who i kin in genshin tbh. so i have decided to take this VERY extensive genshin kin quiz (as per what they've named their site) and surprisingly i got... collei?

though when i read this, it made me realize that, maybe i do kin her. whoops

okay i'm heading to bed now it's 1 am and i'm busy tomorrow 😔 it was nice talking with you again jellyfish !!! have a nice day 🫶

[astrxealis]

also also sorta offtopic but: what other games do ya play?? GO FULL OUT IN RAMBLING

ik you've seen me ramble abt twewy all the time but I also love pokémon, kirby, legend of zelda, detroit become human and golden sun !!! my brother has also been playing Hades lately and tho the playstyle isn't my thing bc I get stressed easily IT'S AN AMAZING GAME AND I LOVE IT

someday I will be able to properly try playing final fantasy and fire emblem HAHA if I have the time to play I'll let you know !!! I really want to try those games TT

HEHEHE AHJBHGDBJGH omg if you say so ,, under the cut bcs idk how much i might. ramble GSGBHB <3 <3 <3 warning. just in advance. sorry annie but you've just enabled me HGSBDHJG

( ok i finished writing. uh. i think i legitimately spent more than an hour what. BUT UHM warning it might be really long but idk HSBDHJG but disclaimer yes no need to read it all!! and tysm once again!! and sorry for. so much rambling HSDJHBG )

( edit again bcs i've woken up HOLY SHIT I DIDNT REALIZE I DIDNT POST THIS. I JUST SAVED DRAFT AND THEN POOFED HELP )

OKAY WAIT FIRST. ik you want more twewy moots yes AND THO i do consider myself to like twewy i still am sadly not into it that much yet despite i rmbr uhh neo demo, wanting to watch the animation, and then once it was on sale. i was hyperfixated on it WHFBJH and then moved on to . triangle strategy HJDSBJG which i still don't have but i cld maybe ask a friend who i convinced to buy it bcs he was curious and i was like ROLAND ROLAND ROLAND and i was rlly excited bcs it ws just around release but they haven't even touched it at all so i'll one day force him to lend me it (and i'll never return it JKJKJK HLEP) BUT YEAH. i feel like i wrote that latter bit w no breath breaks

!!! i rmbr you talking abt pokemon once (IN DMS ?? >O< & ff7!!) and ofc ik you love loz HEHE i was goin thru pics some time ago and. came across the link stuff again GDSGB ^^ I DON'T THINK I KNEW YOU LIKED KIRBY AND DBH THO ... kirby is ADORABLE but i've only ever played like. 5 minutes worth of one of the old games HGBSJHD and loz botw which i haven't finished yet bcs i am not enthusiastic to do the bananas and i had to give back the card to my tita TwT DHB okay funny story we had to make smth for school once and i used a somewhat triggering photo and thankfully it wasn’t anything too bad and no one got yeah. also i was rlly young. but DAMN i’m better now thnkfully ALSO i rly wnt to play sometime >< <3

HADES OH MY GOD I LOVE THAT GAME (than and zag. oh god) !!! i'm only a few hours in uhh around 16?? >< i shld def play more ,, can understand it not being your type in playstyle AHBAHFBJ but fr it's amazing and so loveable <3 tbh i kind of get stressed a bit easily like. i could MAYBE be that kinda "toxic" gamer but i'm too nice and don't want to be mean Out Loud so that's good THGBJ i like the stress . somehow. I HOPE YOU CONTINUE ENJOYING!!!!!

okay uhh so we have a lot of games here. kinda?? my game library in my Head is huge but in my actual reality kind of but not really T__T so ofc there's final fantasy!! i like all 15 (and the upcoming 16th) and the spin offs but i definitely haven't played em all yet HSBDJHG 7, 10, 14, 15 i've played! we have 8, 9, 12, and 13 (kinda, doesn't work anymore T_T) >< also type 0 i think but idk </3 i blame/thank my dad's side esp for me w games/anime/ff HGBJSDH!! 14 is kind of obviously my fave game hehe <33

fire emblem!!! 3H is the one i've only played but i LOVE awakening and fates >_< and shadows of valentia!! i know that even less but i love the credits song which i've alrdy accidentally spoiled myself on and the characters i know!

OK SO UHM. there's a lot we have that i haven't actually played so i won't go too much into depth q-q but god of war, xcom, last of us, uhhhhh wait okay

from ones i've played a bit!! or tried to play a bit!! or know outside of actually playing >< drakenier (3, automata, replicant! 3 is. kinda uh sus but i rlly like it and wna know more in the future. we have automata but i haven't played... i LOVE it sm tho and it's just so good,, & the raids in ffxiv i love SDHGJHA and the small spoilers ik </3 replicant same feelings as automata but we don't have it </3) + ghost of tsushima (i played a bit and it's a beautiful game!!) + uh. AH YES soulsborne (okay these kind of games make me scared. i tried to play bloodborne thrice and chickened and i don't actually have or want the guts to not Chicken BUT. I WANT TO HEAR THE MUSIC. and be challenged by the hard gameplay so sometime,, also we have ds3!! i want elden ring/sekiro rlly badly tho ><) + uhh what else. help OAAAAHH THE WITCHER!! okay we have 3 i. meant to start it a bit ago but then ffxiv took my time again SBDGHJH but i love the series!! just close my eyes at times!! i love the witcher man. and there's horizon zero dawn which i've played for quite a while but i'm def not TOO far into it,, it seems like open world isn't rlly my type T___T

i forgot the others. help. SAHGBJH okay from the ones i've finished or play/ed a lot!! persona <3 i like 3 and 4 but dk well yet :(( i love 5 tho!! such a good game, esp w royal <3 anddd then uh. uhm. HJHBF HELP i've barely finished games tbh T___T but <33 UHHH i like cod too! mario! OH MY GOD SUPER MARIO ODYSSEY!!! and other games oh man T~T

I FORGOT FALLOUT EXISTS HELP okay i’m like. really There in fallout shelter but i don’t play anymore </3 fallout 4 and las vegas we have!! i’m scared to play 4!! but yes!! i also feel terrible for forgetting skyrim holy shit i mostly just watched my dad/sis play until i actually started playing myself. i’m a coward and i admit that but that game is my CHILDHOOD... cuphead is also rlly cool i have just played REALLY little myself but <33 animal crossing is rlly cute!! i love new horizons!! also assassins creed!! we have odyssey which i played a bit but it makes me scared to play too ngl!! devil may cry and metal gear rlly interest me but no games or experience playing :(( love the music and memes tho <3

uh. minecraft was my childhood FOR REAL. i played a bit of mass effect then stopped but i’ll cont when i have time. somehow. HSDBGJH ik it’s rlly good !! LEGO GAMES WERE MY CHILDHOOD TOO... my only 100%. man. i fought so much w my twin over those games it’s absolutely hilarious. dragon age is cool i love inquisition soundtrack but i played a bit of origins and then stopped bcs i got stuck and it’s so ANNOYING... red dead redemption 2 i havent played but <333 resident evil is cool but horror. goodbye. GSHGBFBSD AND OH GOD I FORGOT I ONCE PLAYED A BIT OF GTA5. i stopped bcs it rlly was too much even for me who doesn’t mind swearing. i stole cars and did a bit of story and thn stopped i will never forget the man who opened my car door in the road and i drove off HABJGH ... i forgot what other games i’ve played or have or am interested in this is so much oh god . OH GOD WAIT I FORGOT KINGDOM HEARTS EXISTED HELP that series is so weird but means so much to me weirdly. i rmbr so clearly playing literally the first bit of the game. by first bit i mean literally probably just the first hour or less. and i never got past that bcs i never got to a save but then had to stop playing over and over again but wld always go back and play it AAA kh1!!! and thn kh3 i borrowed and man... <3 i love that game and somehow understood and enjoyed even if it’s literally the ending of a saga i think and i never played the rest HELP

i once again lost track of time it’s almost 5 am oh my god i have to get up before 10. BDHGBD i’LL PROBABLY STOP HERE THEN....... i hope you don’t feel like you have to read everything i’m just rlly Yay you asked and uhm enabled me WHEEZE i love rambling but also i do it a lot but also not that much T___T i genuinely do hope this isn’t annoying though! ^^ not in a like Oh i’m annoying way but in a like. this might actually seriously be A Lot JHGSDJHG

i actually barely know anything about golden sun!! but i searched it up rq and rmbrd i’m interested in dragon quest + diablo + castlevania too !! super mario galaxy was my childhood even tho me and my twin barely did anything bcs we were cowards. HELP. we fought too bcs i shaked the controller and then the stars went everywhere and escaped so she got angry at me. why did i even do that what. ANWAYS UHM IDK WHAT i’M EVEN TALKING ABT ANYMORE HELP gran turismo also interests me!! bcs of my dad >< OH MY GOD I FORGOT i also finished littlebigplanet 3!! it was so annoying w my twin /pos!!! we fought also. man. i love twins they suck (affectionate)

i feel like there’s still more i’m forgetting hm but idk. not gna say stuff about ffxiv bcs that’ll be a lot more rambling I’M SO SORRY. also no mobile games orrr free games uhhh there’d be a lot too. help. BUT UHM YES if you do ever someday properly play ff and fe i’d be really happy but pls /nf !!! and i hope you do enjoy if ever!! <3 tbh i’m a bit >:( when it comes to some stuff abt specifically uhh 7 13 15 and 3h but generally i still love them lots <3 personally i’d def rec xiv even if you aren’t a fan of mmorpgs bcs it’s def an rpg first >< also imo the best final fantasy overall!! even best mmo and def one of the best stories i’ve ever seen ,, BJSDHBG but from the single players, it’s a bit depending on your taste but safe best for sure is 9! overall i’d say the best, from what i’ve heard :O below 7 is not 3d yet but i’m biased to 3 bcs of 14, for reasons, and 4 is <3! and 6 def has prolly the best story from what i’ve heard if not for 14!! 8 is heavily romance based ?? but i personally love the themes sm >< 7 is rlly famous and probably the biggest franchise in the ff franchise :O if you ignore ffxiv HJBHDG! i’d def rec it too <3 10 is my first and rlly special to me and i’d def rec it too for sure!! 12 is more political but personally i love it. havent playe dbut uhm yes. tactics i’ve heard is incredibly good ^^ i barely know it. barely being a bit of an understatement uhhh ik some of the story!! yes!! okay squints that’s all i can talk abt rn help it just turned 5 JBGDHJGB ALSO I’M INTERESTED IN OMORI I ALMOST FORGOT!! horror scares me but ik omori is rlly good <3 i’m just watching bcs i might waste money on not playing if i buy it myself <//3 ^^

GN ANNIE!! or good morning. help. HBGSHDBGJ THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN BTW AND SORRY HELP rambling tho helped clear my head more so aaaa <33 ^^

BUT B4 I STOP FOR REAL i just want to advertise rq BUT NO FORCED /nf /nf /nf SERIOSULY it just makes me happy to do this WHEEZE but ffxiv has a rlly good free trial!! lowkey want to send u stuff no spoilers tho and see what wld convince u to play but do be truthful abt it all uhh yes yes gn >< WHEEZEHBGSHJ it’s available on all platforms basically! not like. switch or mobile tho aaaaa T___T </3 but playstation, mac, steam, pc... ^^ it’s pretty time consuming but it’s an experience i’d definitely recommend!! also no time restrictions for free trial :O so yeah >;D

[aetheternity]

Hard pass 2 (Levi x Reader)

I'm a little concerned about how little time I took on the ending for the last part so I'm gonna put a little more time into this one. Hope you guys enjoy. :)

Synopsis: Levi is forced out of his comfy dorm room and in a strange twist of events right into your arms at a college party.

Levi was transfixed to say the least. He'd spent the past hour that he'd been back in his dorm room staring into a freshly made cup of black tea. The small jingling of keys in the door shaking him from his daze.

"Hello, Hello Leviathan." Mike greeted, tossing his bag to the side haphazardly.

Any other time Levi would've rolled his eyes but he just let out an agitated huff.

"Uh oh.. I know that look." Mike announced plopping down onto his unmade bed. "Who's the lucky girl?" He asked his smirk bright.

Levi's hair whipped against his cheek as he turned to Mike. "What are you on about? Who told you?" Probably Hange. Damn four eyes could never keep her mouth shut.

"No one had to." Mike laughed "You've just told me basically everything I need to know. Your distracted gaze when I came in the room, having very little reaction to me calling you Leviathan, your tea cup is still full and my side of the room is still messy." He seemed a little too pleased about that last bit.

"I know you went out tonight." He continued

"And what about it?"

"Who is she?!" Mike stood coming closer to sit on the edge of Levi's desk.

Levi rolled his eyes setting his cup down.

"Come on, I'm curious about some mysterious girl that has Levi Ackerman wrapped around her finger."

"Just shut up already." Levi replied turning his gaze to the window with a small pout.

"Fine, fine I'll shut up." Mike stood heading back towards his side of the room. An idea suddenly popped into his mind and he turned on his heel. "But.. I think I'll give Hange a call. You know.. cause I haven't talked to her in a bit-"

"When did you become so annoying?" Levi grumbled

"You're more aggressive tonight I like it. Is it because of her?"

As much as Levi wanted to fight it, Mike was one of those people that always got information about literally anything if he genuinely wanted it. Even if he didn't find out from Hange or Levi he was definitely going to find out from even the weirdest sources.

"Hange's friend.. she's not ugly I guess.." Levi could feel his face growing warm and he pulled his feet up onto his desk chair to hide it.

Mike laughed obnoxiously, "It's like watching a little kid finding out what a crush is." He chuckled "Super cute. So when are you going to ask her out?"

"Never."

Mike crossed the room again, seating himself on his bed. "You can't be serious! This is the first time I've ever seen you interested in girls and you're just gonna let her get away?"

"Stay out of my business, Michelangelo."

Mike just huffed reaching into his pocket to pry his phone out of his pocket. The room quickly grew quiet as Levi turned to his laptop though he was quickly distracted again by Mike's little chuckles. He turned his head in Mike's direction quickly catching the other male's gaze.

"By the way, Hange agrees with me." He said pointing to his phone.

Levi groaned, tugging at his hair. "Eat shit."

~ ~ ~ ~

Levi stared down at his watch with a soft tch.

It was 4pm and Hange was late again. He turned to Erwin who's face was currently pressed into a book. Thumb sliding along the sentences as he read.

"Where the hell is she?" He grumbled, shaking his mouse back and forth as the screen began to dim.

"She said she had to do something after class so she'd be a little late." Erwin replied, without looking up from his book.

"That's her excuse every time." Levi replied with a roll of his eyes.

Erwin just shrugged. Hange was always late. Sometimes she just showed up 30 minutes late with no real explanation and sometimes she showed up an hour late saying she had, had something to do after class. But every time the three of them got together to study she was late.

"Yo! Levi!" Hange greeted as she walked into the library ignoring the chorus of shushing that followed her.

Levi's scowl deepened, "Were you stuck on the toilet waiting for someone to fuck off?" He asked

"I have a great surprise follow me." She clapped in delight.

Erwin looked to Levi and then in the direction Hange had left in. He slowly pushed his chair out looking at Levi's irritated scowl.

"Are you coming."

"Whatever it is, is definitely stupid knowing Hange." Levi retorted, packing his belongings up in an orderly fashion.

The two of them quickly left before Hange could come back to ruin the peace again. They pushed through the library doors and standing against the wall with a somewhat bashful expression was Y/N with Hange who smiled brightly as if she wasn't currently disturbing Levi's peace.

"Oh hello Y/N." Erwin greeted, he looked over at Levi before asking. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh well Hange invited-"

"Ah ha ha! Y/N has homework to do so I figured she could come study with us. Though today me and Erwin have a thing." She quickly grabbed Erwin's arm yanking him over to her.

"But I was-" Erwin tried but was instantly silenced by Hange's hand over his mouth.

"You and Levi can study. Levi's great with everything! Right Levi? Ok me and Erwin will go now, by you two!"

"Hange!" Levi tried, his face already flushed with heat over the whole situation. Hange was surprisingly fast though, managing to drag Erwin away so quick they were a couple of dots within seconds.

Levi and Y/N stood in silence for a couple seconds before Y/N let out a deep exhale. "I feel as though we've been set up." She says, toying with the zippers on her back.

Levi can only manage a grunt in reply. Not daring to look into her eyes. "Well I mean.." she starts turning to Levi. "I actually do.. have to study so.. I wouldn't mind if you don't." She shrugged

"Mm.." Levi pulled open the library door for Y/N and lead her over the seats that him and Erwin had been sitting in only moments before.

He made a mental note as he opened his laptop again to keep the door locked next time Hange said she was coming over. Around 10 minutes went by of complete silence and Levi was incredibly happy for it.

Not because he was focusing, no his attention had been completely taken away from any possible work he could've gotten done here. There was no way he was actually going to be able to do anything when your scent was trapped in his nose and his eyes kept staring over his screen at your fingers.

Knuckles that Levi honestly wanted to kiss and fingernails completely devoid of dirt which Levi was instantly captivated by.

"Hey-"

He sat up straight, his own hands slightly curling around the aged wood of the table. Your book came sliding toward him and he looked down at it before looking back at you.

"I don't really get this? Could you help me a bit?"

Levi nodded before his brain could properly process what you'd asked. He almost thought he imagined the way your lip tucked itself under your teeth. And he felt dazed as your scent washed over him all at once as you slid into the seat next to him.

You pointed to your book and Levi tried to pay attention to your question but your notes threw him a bit. All the words were written in different colors and there were squiggly lines around definitions and texts. Small doodles between paragraphs as a way to properly space them and stars next to the most important words.

You scratched at your scalp and he took notice. "I paid attention when my professor was going over this I swear. But I don't really get it?? It can't be as difficult as I'm making it in my head." Your giggle of nervousness took Levi back a little.

The warm pit in his chest deepened and he sighed, trying to accurately assess the situation.

"Y-you made a small.. mathematical error." He explained, his fingers pointed to the equation as he tried to push away the ball in his throat. "You don't need these numbers."

Her smile hit Levi like a truck as it was instantly directed towards him. "Ah, you're so smart." Y/N said "What about this? I checked with the calculator but my answer was way off."

It was hard for Levi to ignore the way your shoulder rubbed up against his sending sparks all through his body like a tidal wave. It was honestly a little overwhelming.

"Oh sorry, am I too close?" You moved away and Levi gulped. He stared at your fingers, he didn't want you to move away.

He was surprised when he looked up and instantly made eye contact with you. "Stay." It probably didn't come out the way he'd wanted but he'd managed it and on some level he was proud of himself.

You smiled, "Sure."

After a while Levi felt himself loosen up a bit but the knot in his stomach was still very much there and alive. He found himself chuckling at your little jokes and he was mostly able to look you in the eyes. (As long as you didn't smile directly at him).

The first hour had been studying with small quips from your end that Levi found he enjoyed. Though around the third hour it turned into horror stories about present and past roommates.

Your laugh was so bright as you tapped your pen cap against the table. "And then Sasha just cracks the window open though it's definitely too late cause Connie had already created a war zone in our room." You were shaking so much from laughter that Levi was honestly a little worried you'd fall out of your chair.

He shook his head where he was resting it in his palm. "I still think Mike forgetting the do not disturb sign was worse." He shrugged

"Mm well maybe someday I'll have a story that bad. Considering Connie and Sasha have been playing a dangerous game of cat and mouse for two years now."

Levi shook his head. "You don't want to walk in on your roommate having sex. No one does.."

He felt his cheeks flush over again. Whether it was from the story or the way you'd playfully pushed his shoulder though he couldn't tell. He watched as you positioned yourself back in the seat next to him.

"Ok, ok. You told me about your roommates relationships. Now tell me about yours."

"What?"

Y/N playfully rolled her eyes. "You know the in and out of Levi. I'm curious."

Levi's gaze fell to the table. "There's nothing to tell."

Y/N's voice immediately softened. "Sorry, didn't mean to try and pull it out of you."

Levi picked up his head closing his laptop. "I-I just.. never felt that way.." he tried

"Not everyone goes to college and high school and stuff for the parties, drugs and sex." You said, laying your elbows against the desk. "I commend you for having a goal and sticking with it."

Levi's heart stuttered at your words. "Did you come.. or well.. umm? What did you-"

He was interrupted by your hand on his shoulder again. "To answer your question." You leaned in closer your breath tickling Levi's earlobe. "Yes I did come specifically for the drugs."

Levi's eyes practically bulged out of his head. This time when you laughed you were met with shushing and stares. "Sorry." You whispered, popping a hand over your mouth. "I'm completely joking." You then said to Levi who's shoulders relaxed with the information.

Levi's signature deadpanned expression was starting to make an appearance now. "That's not funny."

"Hmm.. well I'm laughing so." Y/N laid her head on the table.

"Your humor is shit." He said

"Funny you say that." She laughed back a smirk was playing at Levi's lips. "Hey." Y/N broke the lingering silence.

"What?"

"Give me your number."

"Tch, nice way to ask."

Y/N pretended to be shocked. "Oh, would you prefer I beg?"

Levi already knew how red his entire face had become. No need to check a mirror. "H-hand me your p-phone."

Unsurprisingly even her phone wa as cute. And Levi honestly wanted to admire the case and how warm it felt after being in your pockets. Oh.. you'd touched it with your warm hands. Levi couldn't help but think about how warm your hands must feel. How the spaces between your fingers looked so perfect. Like they-

"Hey." A voice shook Y/N and Levi.

"Jean, what're you doing here?" Y/N asked as she stood moving closer to him.

"You've been gone all day. I had to ask Sasha where you were."

"No, you didn't because you didn't need to come here." Y/N crossed her arms over her chest, pulling her hands into the sleeves of her hoodie. Her eyebrows scrunched together.

"Who's this?" Jean asked gesturing to Levi with his head. Levi felt his chest flare a little.

"Ugh, it doesn't matter because it has nothing to do with you!" She quickly grabbed her bag stuffing her notebook inside. "I'll talk to you later Levi." She explained her face still completely unamused. And with that she was pushing Jean out the door following him right out.

Levi's fingers dug into his palm. Who was that? It couldn't have been her boyfriend right? No, no that didn't make sense.

He started to pack up himself when he noticed your pretty phone sat next to his ordinary black one.

~ ~ ~ ~

Levi practically slammed into his dorm room scaring Mike who had his music blasting. Levi set his bag down on his chair, placing his phone on the desk.

"Hey man." Mike greeted as Levi quickly unpacked his other stuff. "I heard Hange forced you to go on a study date."

"I'm going to murder her." Levi turned, practically slamming his notebook into the desk. So hard that he could've sworn Mike jumped.

"Yeah what else is new?" He laughed trying to clear the air. "But did you at least get in close?"

Levi rolled his eyes. "She's.. there's this guy.."

Mike grew quiet for a few seconds. "You think she's with him?"

Levi normally wouldn't indulge Mike like this but his chest felt so tight that he was pretty sure he was going to burst. "She didn't seem happy to see him. She was like rolling her eyes when he came."

"Maybe he's just some guy then?"

"What if he isn't?"

"By the way you're describing it they'll break up soon anyway." Mike said "But that's great my plan worked."

Levi narrowed his eyes, "The library thing was you?"

Mike shrugged, "Hey, It could've been worse! Hange wanted to lock you guys in a supply closet for the night."

"Sleep with one eye open." Levi huffed, placing your phone down on his desk.

Mike immediately noticed, sitting up and placing his own phone to the side. "Don't tell me you murdered her and stole her phone for having a boyfriend that wasn't you." He chuckled

"Tch, she accidentally left it."

"How are you gonna return it?"

"I'll ask Hange for her dorm number tomorrow and I'll hand it over then."

"Ooo, well I would tell you not to go looking through her phone while you have it. But you're not like me so.." Mike shrugged, laying down with both hands holding his phone above his head.

Levi looked at Mike and then at your phone sitting on his desk. He silently looked away, putting away the rest of his stuff with a huff.