#mca notes

[creekfiend]

saw an MCAS specialist today and she was very good but unfortunately I have medical trauma so I am crying and shaking in bed an hour later lmao

[iluvcapys]

ad rock finds the death note

[a-field-of-dragonflowers]

A Field Guide:

Cassandra, 32, asexual (demi), she/her.

Collecting chronic illness diagnoses like they’re Pokémon and I’m Ash Ketchum (currently working on my immune system-type badge). I'm an attorney (but not your attorney) and feral scholar; collector of video games, books, and whatever catches my eye at the time. 99.5% of this blog is reblogs, but I also make shipping playlists on Spotify, and I occasionally make crafts!

I do most of my blogging from the mobile app these days, so I'm unlikely to actually tag anything because I’m using the quick rebolog, but I do try. Beware of spoilers!

Formerly found at @asongofdragonfire before I lost my email password from like 10th grade and got locked out of that account.

The drink water post and #notonmainyourascal is brought to you by my husband from our side blog @girlos-private-select.

[tnsfrbc]

BNPMIPL Recruitment 2024 | Central Government Jobs 2024 Official Website: https://www.bnpmindia.com/

[thebibliosphere]

I had my annual follow-up with gastro today.

Just like the first time, he walked in carrying a stack of handwritten research notes, sat down, apologized for not checking in with me sooner then proceeded to tell me that he had yet again reviewed my entire medical file, and after seeing how low my ferritin was, thought I would be a good candidate for a camera pill screening to examine my small intestine because he’s worried we’re missing something.

There’s a whole bunch of intestine that can’t be seen via endoscopy or colonoscopy and after taking a chance with “another patient like me,” the capsule camera revealed small bowel disease that was causing major deficiencies.

He told me I could think about it, and also ordered an inflammation stool test that might help narrow down the decision for me based on the results.

He asked about my migraines, my MCAS, my chronic pain and my POTS. He talked about how a small bowel disease could affect all those things in terms of my MCAS and the way my body just seems to crash and burn out of certain vital nutrients at random.

“We need to look at all of you,” he kept saying. “We need to help you.”

He’s so kind and thorough it makes me want to cry.

[subarashiihibi]

on the topic of those cholinesterase inhibitors i've been looking at this one for a while and i read ppl who have my condition's experiences w it and i get all big eyed like woah... u said it helps ur air hunger... u said u feel normaler... like i need that... unfortunately i cant do anything until i get insurance again so 💔

[theclassifiedfan]

HI TOP GUN FIC WRITERS!

So I’ve got some inside knowledge on the workings of Top Gun or more so the military in general (specifically SD military) as I’ve been lucky to work at both Miramar and North Island as well as been deployed on a ship. So thought I’d share for anyone writing their stories and wanting to use it when thinking of ideas or even getting into the writing phase:

DISCLAIMER - I am a civilian and I mostly worked with the marine corps, but I’ve got 13 years with the USMC and 1.5 with USN along with a lifetime of San Diego Navy Brat in me. While I would love to think I’m an expert always feel free to fact check some things.

I’ve made sure all information shared below is public information to not allow for any CUI to be mistakenly released in accordance with OPSEC.

Use what you want & ignore what you don’t want, love reading your stories either way you creative people!

MIRAMAR INFO

Quick History:

Formerly NAS Miramar (est. 1952) and now MCAS Miramar (est. 1997), this is the main hub for Fighter Jet aviation in the San Diego area but strictly Marine Corps Aviation now. Of course some branches touchdown and fly through but there are no active navy squads. This base is relatively close to the water cause it’s San Diego but it’s 4 miles inland so it is land locked and depending on traffic about 30-45 minutes from NASNI (not 4 hours like I read somewhere once). This is the OG Top Gun base, a lot of the places in that original movie are still there but VERY different because it’s been updated quite a bit and the marines own it now.

Their aircraft on base are:

F/A 18 Super Hornet - Very cool, TGM jets

F-35 B&C Lightning - EXTREMELY COOL JETS, these babies are very top secret but are publicly known for their vertical landing capability. Can technically takeoff vertical (but limited in that aspect)

KC-130 Hercules - big support planes used for aerial refueling and other support missions

CH-53E Super Stallion - Awesome Cargo helicopters that move large loads and equipment

MV-22 Osprey - If a plane and a helicopter had a baby! These incredible fixed wings use tilt rotors to vertically take off/land and then tilt those propellers forward for flight (If you haven’t seen one transform check it out they’re amazing). Used for troop transport, special operations, and humanitarian aid.

NAS NORTH ISLAND INFO

Quick History:

Commissioned in 1917 and recognized as the birthplace of Naval Aviation in 1963 it’s a beacon of navy pride. Now, time to mess with some Top Gun Movie canon: this base has never had USN Strike Fighter Tactics Instructor Program (aka Top Gun). Maverick was filmed here, but the program lived on Miramar when it was founded in 1969 and then was relocated to NAS Fallon in 1996 (shoutout Fallon, and they filmed out there BUT Nevada is boring why base their story out there when it could be based here). NASNI is now a master helicopter base, there are no active fighter jet squadrons on north island - but I believe they host them across branches here and there!

Their aircraft on base are:

MH-60 Seahawks - Incredible helicopters that are used in so many missions such as anti-submarine warfare, anti-surface warfare, vertical replenishment, passenger and cargo transfer, and search and rescue capability

V-22 Osprey - the same the Marines use but now being adapted into North Island. Again very cool aircraft with the best (and worst) of both worlds as a fixed wing and a rotary.

Learjet 35 - comfortable transportation aircraft

C-40A Clipper - basically a military 737

NAS LEMOORE

I won’t put too much info in here because I know it’s not the “cool canon movie base” but I will note this is the navy’s west coast Master Jet base since its commission in 1961! It’s in Kings County/Fresno County.

OK NOW LET’S ‘FACT CHECK’

Again take what you want from my ramblings these are just some things I notice in fics that contradict actual military policy and life. But even the movies don’t follow that, so just take these as tools for writing ideas!

Navy = Sailors (Pilots = Naval Aviator)

Marines = Marines

Army = Soldier

Air Force = Airman

Mix these up and someone could get annoyed with you and they’ll often correct you on the spot. Think of the branches like fraternities or sports teams - yes they’re playing the same game but they love to compete against each other. Plus they’re high key frenemies.

There’s a strict dress code on base including in the Gyms

Attire should be conservative and modest, with no revealing clothing, undergarments visible, or items designed for undergarments at all times. For the girls it’s even more rules because of course it is so no mini skirts, no cleavage, no crop tops. Some bases take this more seriously than others and you can get in trouble for it.

In the gym you have to have shirts on at all times, no booty shorts, absolutely no wearing only sports bras, no stringer tank tops and all that jazz.

Beach is fine though cause it’s the beach, and don’t worry I get it people wanna like good in their fics so slay away lol

Fightertown is not an actual town

It’s also not north island, it’s still Miramar. That was the nickname for the base itself so it stayed there with the marines that took it on in 1996. Plus a good way to keep the history of Fightertown united and in its OG place.

You cannot be permanently stationed anywhere in the US Navy.

You go where they want and need you. Some fics talk about the daggers becoming a full time squadron which honestly could happen, as squadrons come and go all the time however from my experience pilots have to move every 2-3 years and the daggers would be changed out. There’s some cases where they can request to “fleet up” to stay in that squadron or even bounce to another squadron and stay in the same spot but that’s a wish that cannot always be granted.

Dating in your squadron has consequences

In the U.S. Navy, while dating another sailor in your unit is generally not prohibited, it could potentially lead to a transfer or other issues if certain conditions are met. There’s a very strict fraternization policy which prohibits relationships that compromise the chain of command, good order, and discipline.

One aviator dating another aviator sounds fine because they’re two officers who tf cares, but there’s a very high chance one of you will be sent away if they feel it risks the unit/squad. Note how I say if they feel, you might be fine with it and it might be you two get along great but if a higher up says no - someone’s gotta go.

Also no officer enlisted, there’s technically ways around this like if they were married before or dating before but in the same command? Forget about it. BIG no. Could be a cute Romeo and Juliet thing forbidden love - this is just talking on the reality of it.

Civilians are not allowed on base

Unless they are directly being escorted on base by a service member or they are a dependent/civilian employee with their own credentials they are not coming on base. Even if they ask nicely and say you know so and so, this has been even tighter since 9/11 but in the past few years it’s gotten much more strict. There are Air Shows on bases which open them to the public but without that there’s pretty much no chance you’re getting on base. If you did then someone is getting their ass beat.

The Hard Deck is based on the I Bar

While the Hard Deck is fictional (although the set they made which is very real and somewhere locked away on north island) the I Bar is very real! Amazing place and they have someone who’s their version of Penny and has been working there for a very long time that the aviators love along with their other awesome bartenders.

Those rules in the bar are pretty close to the real ones which are:

“He who enters covered here buys the bar a round of cheer” (you aren’t supposed to wear a uniform cover or hat anywhere inside although some places let hats slide not here though they will ring you)

No phones on the bar

No hats/covers on the bar

Don’t touch the planes! It’s in the movie as well but the real bar has authentic donated model planes that they added this rule to make sure they live a long life without being broken.

There’s no official “disrespect a lady or the navy..” but it’s unspoken - the guys in there will call you out and there’s some very high ranking people who go frequently and you don’t want them catching you pulling that in their bar.

Now another new thing is that they can’t “make you pay” anymore so if you violate a rule they’ll ask if you’d like to. That being said they added this rule because of the influx of people wanting to see the bar because of Top Gun but the pilots HATED THIS and you will piss off a lot of aviators for not following their traditions. But if you do pay up? So many new friends lmao

Used to be an officers/aviators only bar, but it’s open for everyone who has access to the base.

North Island is not its own Island

NAS North island is a base located on the island Coronado. It’s a navy heavy island mixed with a lot of very rich people. Houses are not cheap and neither are apartments, so there’s not a high chance you’ll see anyone O4 and below living on the island unless they have roommates or they’re a chief that’s been in the navy for a long time. They’d probably live downtown or off island if they wanted to live alone or TRY to buy a home. (Houses here sell for at least around a milly in most places)

There’s some bars on the island as well including one bar called “Danny’s” which is a well known Navy Seal bar because there’s a Seal Base also located on the island more toward the long strip that connects the island to Imperial Beach.

The Naval Academy is not where pilots are made

I’ve found a few fics where they talk about Bradley going to UVA and then the Naval Academy but the USNA is a college in itself. It’s not typically transfer in type of school because if you go that route you start from the bottom as a freshman.

But to be an aviator you do not need the academy. There’s two other routes to becoming an officer which is ROTC and OCS:

The way I suspect Rooster went is to go to a normal university that has an ROTC program and complete it which leads straight to commissioning right-after graduation.

OR graduate any school like normal and then apply to officer candidacy school (OCS) where if accepted you’ll do an officer version of basic training. Which to be fair if that’s the route he took I’d be pissed at Maverick too because that means completing school in 4 years plus whatever amount of time it takes to apply to OCS with the preference of aviator (which is super compact) and can take anywhere from about a year to multiple vs into the academy and good to go.

Once they complete one of the three and are qualified via testing to be an aviator they’re off to flight schools, of which there are many to come.

(Also you could make it to flight school and get dumped out because of maybe not hitting the mark, or even medical stuff that they missed/skipped before - then get transferred to a different type of officer job)

Gold Star kids - AKA Rooster

Gold star kids are those like Bradley who lost a parent due to death during their service, and they do not get to stay on base once their loved one passes. They’ll have a certain amount of time to find a home then move off to make space for another active duty family. BUT the surviving spouse if they’re civilian usually (I believe) retain their benefits for the rest of their life. Not the kids though they get kicked off healthcare at 21 unless they’re still in school enrolled full time and their parents are more than 50% financially taking care of them. It’s all kind of intense and very sad but it’s true.

Dependants are not all nice

NOTE HOW I SAID NOT ALL. There’s some fantastic people but it’s not all sunny and perfect. I’ve worked in the recreational, support, and retail aspect of military bases and the horror stories I could tell you about certain military dependents. Crazy, some of them are literally insane. But could be used for some interesting dramatic aspects of your stories. I’d put examples but I have too many to name.

Pilots don’t fix their planes

Yes they have to learn the ins and outs of their planes and they’re absolutely tech savvy as well as extremely smart. BUT you will not see a naval aviator working on a plane, they have enlisted sailors who work hard and go through a lot of training/school to do that and they deserve their roses. They’d probably kick their officers ass if they saw them taking a wrench or tool of any type to those planes. Pre flight inspections are different to maintenance. That reminds me…

ENLISTED SAILORS EXIST IN AVIATION

I feel sad that fics/stories leave them out in the workplace. They have really great bonds with pilots because pilots can’t fly without them and put all of their trust into them. The sailors and chiefs are the best in their fields and often are credited for being the ones who teach officers because it’s true - think like this:

An officer commissions to O1 (ensign) after earning a bachelors degree which is on average around 21/22. Depending on how they commissioned they may not have worked any college jobs (some have never worked a job at all) so this is their first job and they are in charge of people plus millions of dollars worth of equipment. That’s not including the 2-3 years it takes to pass flight schools.

Enlisted sailors can start service at 17. They’ve been in their jobs going to schools and mastering their trade for a hot minute. They’d often can be the same age of their officer (let’s say 23 for an aviator who went through flight schools) and have 6 years of service in their belts, they know the game.

The best leaders I’ve met in the military know how to be that leader while also learning from their sailors. That bond of trust both ways is crucial for success.

Some ships have WiFi

But it can be limited, it also can get turned off for any reason at any time if it means keeping the ship safe. So could they text and call/FaceTime? On a carrier for sure UNLESS they’re in need of turning it off for a while. Super great for sailors to stay connected honestly wish they’d had that when my dad was in.

Call signs often are not a cool brag

Usually it’s from a time you fucked up and now it’s stuck with you so everyone can have a laugh. You can’t change it and you can’t pick one yourself. That’s not to say that can’t be from cool moments but the ones I’ve met it’s been from funny moments with their squad.

I think the only way it could get changed is if it was really bad like one you couldn’t say in front of an admiral without getting in trouble. I think they usually change those to ‘redacted’ or try to make it an abbreviation so it’s not immediately obvious it’s a fucked up nick name. The ones from back in the day were super messed up. Or maybe you ranked up high enough to change it cause who’s going to tell a Captain what they can or can’t do.

ADDED FACT CHECKS:

It’s Naval Air Station (NAS) North Island NOT Navy Air Force Base/Station North Island/North Island Air Force Base/Air Force Naval Base

Two different branches completely. I do understand why people would put this and this is not me attacking people but I would very much suggest not combing the two because a naval aviator is capable of something Air Force pilots aren’t:

Landing a plane/helicopter on a ship in the middle of the ocean.

They train like crazy to have this skill and let me tell you landing on that thing is no easy feat. Naval Aviators (and Marines they get qualified in this too!) deserve that hype because the risk that takes comes from so many people in a plane and on deck to succeed in? INSANE. I’ve been in Tower (primary flight control or ‘pri-fly’ for short) and there’s so much that goes into this process including collaborating with the people driving the ship. I wasn’t even in an active combat zone so idk how this legends do it with people shooting at them.

All love Air Force Pilots, they could probably be trained to do it - however they aren’t soooo… FLY NAVY 😈

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Oh man that was A LOT of info. If you’re reading this? How’d you make it this far? Also hope it helped in someway or another to spark some ideas. I’ve debated writing some kind of story haven’t gotten the courage up but YOU ALL ARE AND YOU ARE AMAZING AT IT!

[jokeringcutio]

Still here, still dreaming.

Hi lovelies 💛 I wanted to give a little update.

I’ve had to pause writing thank-you stories for Ko-fi donations. I simply can’t keep up due to long COVID (PEM/MCAS/asthma) and post-surgery recovery. The truth is, I haven’t been able to work since 2020, and while I’d saved up to finally start self-publishing, most of that had to go toward medical costs.

What I’m currently fundraising for is a lightweight, foldable wheelchair so I can join my friends at a book event this fall, and just... move through the world a little more safely and with a little more freedom.

Anything beyond that will help me inch closer to my publishing dream. I’m still writing, just slower, gentler... and hoping to release something this year. I had plans, and while they’ve been delayed, I haven’t given up.

Welcome to my Tumblr Blog

~~ Masterlist - Request Box  ~~

A quick hello and introduction to my new followers ♡ And perhaps if you don’t follow me yet, this is a nice way to get to know a little more about my blog.

IMPORTANT NOTE MARCH ‘24: Due to Medical Reasons I am currently unable to post regularly (or write much). Please bear this in mind.

A mature, 18+, reader and writer here, famously posting darker romance tales on this account. I love to explore new things in my drabbles, imagines, headcanons, and multi-chapter fics. Feel free to check my interests and leave me a request.

What do I write?

Almost anything. I seem to have a passion for dark romance and general dark fiction. I like writing about villians. I try and specialize in writing reader inserts that don’t include y/n and that hopefully feel natural enough for the reader to enjoy.

Types of tales:

Headcanons: Lists of ideas and thoughts about a certain character and a certain topic.

Drabbles: A short fragment of a tale, or fragments blended together.

Imagines: Combination of headcanon and drabble.

One-shot: A longer story that isn’t just a fragment, but is posted as one piece.

Multichapter: A story containing several chapters. I am infamously bad at finishing them, but I do make attempts.

Genres:

I tend to drift between dark & angst, and humor and fluff. I suppose I would want to give everything a go.

What I won’t write.

Try me. I will probably discover more things as time passes. But I won’t write underage smut and about miscarriages.

Requests/Prompts

Feel free to send in requests and prompts whenever my ask is open for requests. I might take a while before answering or filling them. If for whatever reason I (have to) decline to create a fill, I will try and let you know asap.

I am doing this all in my spare time (which is very sparse) and am writing mostly for my own enjoyment. Like most (fan)fiction writers, I share my works for that very small percentage that has been hoping for one of these stories to appear online. I am not doing this for the likes/reblogs/hits (though they do help, just saying 👀 ).

~~ Masterlist - Request Box ~~

[somewhatstacey]

Lupus? Fibromyalgia? MCAS? Who knows!

I DO know every inch of my skin feels like the site of a chemical burn right now so if I turn into a Batman villain please note this down as my origin story

[oh-no-its-bird]

Pspspsps have you considered creating all the founder guys in tomodachi life? XD you could get your favs married.

I do not know what tomodachi life is !!! However after looking it up, it looks super cute and now I'm thinking ab it. It says it runs on Nintendo tho which I tragically do not have :(

Sitting here sadly stating at where I've made Tobirama and Madara get married in the sims and in minecraft (thank you mca mod) ,,, I need more games to make them in,,,

On that note actually. With the new life and death expansion I should totally open up my founders sims game and try to turn Izuna into a vengeful ghost to haunt Tobirama, that'd be fun

[jmtorres]

Hi, this is random, but would you mind sharing more about your gut issues/long covid? (I.e. diagnosis, treatment). I have chronic fatigue, and gut issues that are definitely linked to that, but all of my doctors are being extremely useless about it. (No worries if this is not the kind of info you want to share with a total stranger on the internet)

(This is in reference to my comment on this post)

@reptilerex I appreciate you recognizing the sensitivity of this ask, I am going to go ahead and answer it because I feel like the likelihood that you or someone you know (or even others of my readers) are struggling with long covid and finding adequate medical help vastly outweighs the minuscule probability that you've hacked into HIPAA records and are planning to dox me lol

so in the immediate aftermath of my first bout of covid (despite vaxxing and masking regularly, I'm up to two now 😭) my obvious symptoms were fatigue – going to the grocery store would wear me out for 2+ days – and a 20 year-old scar from a car accident reopened, which sounds like some scurvy ass bullshit, and I do wonder if the fact that my friend @niqaeli, who knew that long covid symptoms are highly correlated with MCAS symptoms and was encouraging me to start MCAS otc treatments like vitamin C supplements, helped. (worth noting that while I didn't hear anything about old scars reopening as a covid/post covid thing before it happened to me, but when I told people about it, they were like "oh yeah, that happened to me or someone I know" SO often) My doctor sent me to a wound specialist for that, and they kept poking it trying to figure out if there was some embedded shrapnel that they hadn't realized was in there originally, but ultimately it just healed back over much redder and angrier than the first time.

so then, the fatigue. My doctor had me wait three months because it wasn't officially long covid until three months. obnoxious as hell. I found out the DMV accepts long covid for a disability placard reason and got my doctor to write me a DMV form about how I couldn't walk hardly any distance. she was willing to do that before the three month mark.

I was Johnny on the spot coming back three months after, the first thing she did was send me for a chest x-ray because the obvious/expected reason for fatigue is you're not getting enough O2 in your blood. There was nothing wrong with my lungs and we were kind of at a dead end until I presented my doctor with more options.

I mean, I was kind of like, my PCP is being useless, I have a PPO, why can't I just go directly to a specialist, but it turns out specialist won't take you without a referral because reasons. I had heard rheumatologist is as good at figuring out weird vague shit so I tried to book there but when I told them long covid, they said that wasn't their department. They said I needed to go see an immunologist which sounded wrong to me, but there was a pretty good HIV specialist immunologist in the area that I tried to book with who said no that's not what long covid is. someone recommended a Long Covid Specialty clinic in a city that is 2 to 5 hours away depending on traffic and I knew I wasn't making that drive in my current condition so was like somebody local gotta help me.

so I went back to my PCP and said to her that I had learned from disability communities online that sometimes a rheumatologist can be helpful. And she said OK we can do some blood tests for inflammation markers to see if I can justify a referral to a rheumatologist. (and I thought of my weird scar issue and thought gee I better have some weird inflammation markers)

So I had some inflammation markers pop and I got a referral to a rheumatologist, and they were actually willing to see me. The rheumatologist ordered so many tests, like an unbelievable number of tests. I think they drew like eight vials of blood. Plus other samples. The rheumatologist was basically like let's look for anything and everything.

I had a borderline response on Calprotectin. To quote from the explainer in the test notes:

Calprotectin in Crohn's disease and ulcerative colitis can be five to several thousand times above the reference population (50 mcg/g or less). Levels are usually 50 mcg/g or less in healthy patients and with irritable bowel syndrome.

so I wasn't high enough to qualify for IBD outright from that test results, but I was high enough that it flagged to the rheumatologist, and I had reported a family history (brother has IBD), so he said that was enough to diagnose and started prescribing me for that.

The thing is, rheumatology is an ass backwards way to get an IBD diagnosis and I was having another symptom that I hadn't reported because I was a dumbass and this is the apocryphal frog boiling slowly thing. I was having fairly regular loose stool/diarrhea. if I had told my PCP that could I have gotten a referral to a gastroenterologist and gotten a less ass backwards diagnosis?

I hadn't told my PCP about loose stools for two reasons:

I didn't think it was relevant to the fatigue, and in fact, I still didn't think it was relevant when the rheumatologist called it, and I was really surprised when taking medication for IBD did actually turn out to help the fatigue

I knew I was lactose intolerant, so I thought it was already explained. However, the rheumatologist and I had this exchange:

Him: so do you still drink regular milk or just Lactaid?

Me: Lactaid

Him: then you shouldn't still be having diarrhea

Me:…

I can't remember the first med he started me on because I was only on it for a couple of weeks before we had to switch. (it helped a lot when I could tolerate it but about every three days I had to throw up and then I felt awful and didn't take the med for a couple of days and you can guess how that went.) the one that I went on long-term that actually worked without side effects for me was mesalamine/lialda. I also started experimenting with some dietary changes, the low FODMAP diet is intended for IBS not IBD, but you are still expected to have IBD triggers so I was playing around with that.

for a few weeks, I had incredible improving energy. It was crazy.

then I made what I can only now think of as a mistake in trying to be proactive about my care. because I had stumbled ass backwards into an IBD diagnosis and I felt like I should have gastroenterologist confirm it, and I went to go see my brother's gastroenterologist. he wanted to do a colonoscopy and he asked me to go off the mesalamine for six weeks so that he could see what my colon was like without treatment and it was the worst fucking six weeks of my life. Hated it. colonoscopy results: he didn't see anything fucking wrong and would not diagnose IBD or prescribe mesalamine based on what he found. I said, but the mesalamine improves my symptoms, what does that mean? He said, it means keep seeing your rheumatologist.

I went back to the rheumatologist and told him about the whole debacle with the gastroenterologist and he was like "so how did he explain your inflammation readings?" like CHECKMATE. And he concluded that any lesions I had must be in the small intestine, not the large intestine and so were not seen by colonoscopy.

I kept taking mesalamine. My improvement was slower after the break from it which sucks but I did get back to normal lab work within six months, hallelujah.

Follow up: MORE stuff that might have been avoided if I had gastroenterologist regularly, had gotten an IBD diagnosis from a gastroenterologist, or had mentioned my shitty symptoms in the immediate: the gallbladder bullshit this summer

I had my second round of covid in May and I didn't notice a lot of fatigue coming out of it, though I was more cautious with myself the second time around, but I was sort of holding my breath for what horrible nonsense is going to come out of this now? so then I had what I thought was a really bad case of Gerd that didn't go away for two weeks even though my Gerd usually resolves in like a day. I went to my PCP twice during this period and then ultimately ended up at the ER when I realized my pain was in my side not central anymore and I was worried about appendicitis. It wasn't appendicitis. It was my gallbladder. and it came out that night. overall, I am very happy with how the hospital handled the emergency for instance, I didn't realize until two weeks later that I seriously could've died because they were so calm about it the whole time but like they don't do same-day surgery unless death is on the line, let's be real.

but here's things that could have been helped if I had better gastroenterology care:

I didn't find this out until I was researching gallstones after the fact, and I would like to think a gastroenterologist would have warned me whereas the rheumatologist wasn't super aware of it but: IBD can lead to gallstones because one of the ways a cholesterol gallstone forms is, if you get an imbalance of bile and cholesterol in your gallbladder; your body wants to recycle bile by reabsorbing it at the end of your small intestine, but if you have IBD, sometimes it loses the bile instead of reabsorbing it, and then you get an overabundance of cholesterol, turning into a gallstone the size of a golf ball

I told my PCP it was a case of Gerd that wouldn't go away, but I didn't tell her I was also having diarrhea. Diarrhea is not a Gerd symptom. Maybe if I had just fucking told her she might've recognized or could've sent me to somebody who would have recognized it as a gallbladder symptom before it turned into an immediate emergency

tl;dr don't hide your gut symptoms from your doctor because you "think" you know what's wrong with your guts or that it's not related to your other problems or you're embarrassed or what the fuck ever just tell them that you're shitting yourself because it might turn out to be important

[stepswowdsen]

【KagePro】 Kuroha/Saeru Rambles + KuroEne AU Route Set-up (WIP)

Intro

WIP version post for now.

I think I have a post queued for later today or tomorrow 🤔

Depends on when I get it done, but I think it'll most likely be posted by tonight for me. I'll post the proper post whenever I get it done ^^

I think it'll be formatted like this.

Summary

Kuroha/Saeru's Pronouns (First-person and Second-person pronouns in Japanese)

Yakuwarigo (Role Language)

KuroEne AU: Route Set-up (Summary)

KuroEne AU: Saeru's pet name for Ene (HC)

Saeru's Knowledge (HC)

A being that exists as part of nature

Kuroha/Saeru's Pronouns

I wrote them down as a list in my Notion doc files, but I just want to confirm my list is correct, first.

I wanna rip the rest of the KagePro manga scans in JP, just so I can check over MR1 and MR2 and confirm his usage of pronouns first.

Yakuwarigo (Role Language)

Yakuwarigo (役割語, lit. “Role language”) refers to fictional characters' dialects.

I'll provide a quick overview and some context first ^^

KuroEne AU: Route Set-up (Summary)

I think I've rambled about it a lot before, but I wanted to make a post summarizing the set-up and context of my KuroEne AU, and note some common Route branches (depending on Saeru's actions)

In my KuroEne AU, Kuroha/Saeru meets Ene anywhere from 1 - 2 years prior to the start of KagePro canon.

Ene finds Shintaro 1 year prior to the start of KagePro canon.

I usually write settings where he meets Ene 2 years prior to the start of canon (soon after she lost her human body)

Since at that point, Ene hasn't found Shintaro yet, and would still be looking for a place to stay, so that's the perfect opportunity for Saeru to offer her a place to stay.

Saeru drops Kenjirou's body MUCH earlier in my KuroEne AU in order to meet Ene as Black Konoha.

Discarding Kenjirou at this point isn't an issue in the slightest for him.

He can just use Awakening Eyes as Black Konoha, to create as many fake identities as he wants.

So, he can still manipulate humans to get access to funding and resources by taking Kenjirou's appearance (and any other fake identities he decides to create)

His secret underground lab (that he got built via Kenjirou's connections) has improved security in my KuroEne AU (compared to MCA lmfao)

The underground/lower levels are only accessible to him with a biometric scanner, via his finger prints.

He takes the disguise of Kenjirou when communicating with the humans in his lab (ex. guards/security on the upper levels), and then turns back into Black Konoha when he's down in the lower levels.

I imagine that he does most of his research and keeps his notes/journals on the creation of Ene's android body (ex. blueprints, designs, sketches, notes, etc.) in the lowest levels of his lab, to ensure that no one but him can access it.

Saeru decides to arranges a meeting with Ene.

I imagine he manages to find/get her general location (which shouldn't be difficult, he probably has methods to tap someone's location)

Though Ene hasn't met Shintaro yet so she's moving from place to place in the cyber world.

He sends her an e-mail arranging for a meet-up.

I HC that he uses "xxx" as his initials ❌❌❌

Coincidentally, Azami's favourite initials in her diary were "xxx" so I imagine that's also one of the reasons why he has a tendency to use it.

Ene wonders about the e-mail she got from a mysterious sender.

On the day of their meet-up, I imagine that Ene is out in the city (in electronic devices, since Iirc she can connect as long as there's Wi-Fi), when he decides to appear in her general vicinity, prompting her to follow him.

Ene is surprised when she sees his figure in the distance. He looks just like Haruka/Konoha.

Saeru then heads to an isolated/secluded location (abandoned building), once he's confirmed that Ene is following him.

Ene jumps through electronic devices so that she can follow him.

She cannot afford to let the chance escape her, especially after seeing someone who has such an uncanny resemblance to Haruka/Konoha's appearance...

To make up for her regrets from last time, she doesn't want to let him out of her sight again.

Once he's confirmed that no one else is around, Kuroha/Saeru then makes himself known to her and introduces himself as "Black Konoha" or "Kuroha"

"Hello... I do believe this is the first time we've met?"

(This is the first time in this Route... but not the first time ever (considering all previous Routes))

In future Routes (all other Routes after the first KuroEne AU Route), he remembers and uses the nickname "Kuroha" that he remembers Ene using before, to shorten the name.

He asks her if she really is living in electronic devices, and Ene is suspicious, but confirms his statement. She is curious about him, though.

Ene is suspicious of this mysterious stranger offering to help her so suddenly, but is curious about him, since his appearance and voice resembles Haruka/Konoha's... She can't let the chance escape her!

He comments on her unusual predicament of being stuck inside the cyber world, and says that he can help her. He proposes to make an android body for her so that she can move around in the real world.

Ene is surprised, but wonders if he has any ulterior motives for offering to go out of this way for her, and asks if he's some kinda loan shark or a shady scientist who wants to experiment on her.

Saeru tells her that he's a brilliant scientist/engineer (LOL) who wants to tests the bounds of his knowledge. The truth is, he is interested in her.

He tells her he is nterested in learning more about her and her predicament.

He would also make reasonable enough claims to back up his offer and appease her worries. He says that he is entirely willing to prove it to her, to gain her trust.

He's not looking for money. He has enough of it, as is.

Ene decides to accept his offer, so Saeru has Ene transferred into his phone, and brings her to his home (one of Kenjirou's spare homes that he has access to) to stay.

Saeru works on the android body at his lab, and comes home to chat with Ene to get to know her and talk about his progress (while leaving some details out, ofc)

Once Saeru finishes making the body and finalizes his tests, he brings Ene to the lab via his phone and asks if she can transfer into it via the systems he built, wanting to confirm if it works.

Once it's ready, Ene is surprised how fast he got it done and asks if he's some kind of super genius or something. It's still shocking.

(With each new Route, I imagine he gets the android body built faster and better each time, since he remembers how to make it and makes upgrades based on his previous knowledge.)

(I will leave the details of whatever complicated systems Saeru built, to him... I know nothing about robotics)

I imagine that Ene transfers into the android body's motherboard (since it has a Wi-Fi connection), and can control the body's motor controls seamlessly, with whatever complicated systems/processes Saeru built

She's surprised when it feels just like her old human body.

Saeru is satisfied that his efforts and meticulous testing have paid off. It works, just as planned...

Ene is grateful for his efforts and expresses her appreciation to him for going all this way for her. She says she doesn't know how to repay him.

She then realizes that she doesn't really have a place to stay.

Saeru then calmly tells her that she can come live with him if she wants. He proposes to her to come live with him at one of his spare homes.

Ene says she wouldn't want to intrude on someone's private home, but he tells her that he doesn't mind.

Ene asks if there are spare rooms she can stay in, and he tells her that his home is spacious enough to have guest rooms, and Ene feels relieved.

Ene then decides to accept his offer, and tells him, "Please take good care of me."

Note: よろしくお願いします (Yoroshiku onegaishimasu, "Please treat me well/take care of me")

When Saeru shows her around his private home, Ene says she missed the feeling of being out in the real world, and is surprised how spacious his home is. He then tells her if he needs anything, then just ask.

Ene muses to herself that he is completely different from Haruka/Konoha, but that's fine, since she's changed since then, too.

I imagine Ene often takes the opportunity to go out on walks exploring the city on her own, and comes back to the house when she's done.

Saeru often goes out of the house on his own to work at the lab (and takes disguises as his fake identities to continue amassing money and resources to prepare for his August 15th plan)

He comes back to the house after "work" and chats with Ene about his progress (ex. Improving her android body), obviously keeping his real motives and secrets of his plans hidden.

KuroEne AU: Route Branches

I have a couple different Route branches depending on Saeru's actions.

The main ones are:

(Copy pasting this from previous rambles)

As long as it's in a Route where he doesn't meet the rest of the Mekakushi Dan until August 15th, Saeru can reveal his true name.

Once he gets closer with Ene, he can reveal the name Saeru ("Clearing") to her, and vaguely tell her about the Eye Abilities' origins (while keeping Azami's identity hidden)

He tells her that he has some origins with snakes, and is an Eye Ability user like her, that can transform his body at will (Awakening's power)

Ene is surprised but figures that it's not too out of the realm of possibility since she also has these "Red Eyes." She accepts his story and is impressed by his powers. She's delighted to find someone who is in the "same predicament as her."

KuroEne AU: Kuroha/Saeru's pet name for Ene 🐍🐇

I headcanoned what Kuroha/Saeru's pet name for Ene would be in my KuroEne AU

俺の親愛なるウサギちゃん (Ore no shin’ai naru Usagi-chan, “My dear/beloved [little] bunny/rabbit”)

Quoting from my Notion docs:

I chose "My dear little bunny/rabbit" or 俺の親愛なるウサギちゃん (Ore no shin'ai naru Usagi-chan; "[My] dear/beloved [little] bunny/rabbit") as Kuroha's nickname/pet name for Ene because her twintails look like bunny ears.

But his chosen nickname is definitely on purpose on his part, because bunnies are the prey of snakes, and he is the predator animal. So it still ends up playing up to his ego.

I really like that it ends up playing to the "Predator and Prey" and "Hunter and Hunted" theme-ing between Saeru and his S/O.

Iirc the usage of 親愛なる (Shin'ai naru) originated from the Meiji era so its origins are archaic, and is mainly used in letters and texts, and rarely in real conversation.

Though you'll see some animanga and game charas use it. I think it's perfect for Saeru considering his origins as an ancient being.

Saeru's Knowledge

Since Saeru is the embodiment of Azami's "knowledge/wisdom," and, according to the Novel Route, "knows everything from the start of civilization up to modern science"

That is insane to think about... That is an insane amount of knowledge.

I started wondering about how much that knowledge encompasses/entails, whether it includes things like languages.

Like he must be able to read and write in the ancient script that Azami wrote in in her journals

Iirc, in MR2, Ayaka was surprised that she was somehow able to read it when she went through Mary's belongings (which contained Azami's diary)

Does he only know things he’s seen and personally witnessed?

I have a personal HC that if he's seen it, then he knows it.

For example, Saeru possesses Kenjirou in most Routes, and must've seen him code before (ex. Kenjirou made HaruTaka's game for the school festival)

His accumulated knowledge and retention of previous Routes (timelines), is how he’s able to build Ene’s android body in my AU.

With that much knowledge at his disposal, his capabilities far surpass human technologies and limits.

I imagine that every time, he remembers the code since it's stored in his metaphorical knowledge bank

So he remembers how to code all the processes needed for Ene's body and enhances her body with upgrades/improvements and adds new features to it to suit his desires with every loop (ex. Battery improvements/upgrades so Ene can be out in the real world for longer without the body needing to charge as often)

In the context of this AU, Ene's body is his greatest creation.

So he must be able to do it too. With that much knowledge, picking up new skills must come naturally to him then.

In canon, we don't know how "clear" his retention of memories is, through Clearing Eyes.

I personally headcanoned that he keeps his memories and can remember specific encounters from previous Routes in detail.

Because to me, it just makes his interactions with Ene more interesting if he remembers their previous encounters and intimate moments together from previous Routes.

I'd imagine later on he'd just bring up those encounters just to tease her.

Being that exists as part of nature

In the KagePro manga, Kuroha looks over the city from a rooftop and comments on the “muddy dirt stained (polluted) sky” and “humans spreading their greed wherever they go.”

He asks Konoha if he agrees with him after taking over his body. Since they're both Eye Ability snakes born from Azami, he calls him 兄弟 (Kyoudai, "Brother; mate; friend"), seeing him as fellow brethren.

As someone who was there before the world was created, and observed the world from the very beginning and got to see it develop to the modern age, as a being who is close to Nature...

Of course canon-verse Kuroha/Saeru would feel that way about pollution, as an animal, a being who lived as apart of/alongside Nature, alongside Azami.

But he also loves humans and their foolishness. Humans are also beings/animals who exist as part of nature, too, after all.

[tightwadspoonies]

Recipes

Recently my wife and I have been offering our cooking/recipe creation skills on reddit to anyone who has a very limited diet due to food allergies/intolerances/MCAS, GI issues, or any other problem that limits a diet to very few foods.

If you're someone who might benefit from this, send your safe foods to our inbox and we'll post a couple recipes!

You can absolutely do this on anon if you are more comfortable. I can also make meal shake or tube feed recipes.

Note that we are not nutritionists, we just like a good challenge and helping people eat their best.

[usafphantom2]

F-4J Phantom of VMFA-115 "Silver Eagles" in the special "Bicentennial" markings at MCAS Iwakuni, Japan, in November 1976.

Please note the unusual "Triple Nuts" (OOO) in red/white/blue on the nose. A silver eagle marking painted in silver appeared on the fuselage side.

@perpetuaosombro via X

[thebibliosphere]

Met with a speech therapist today. She was very nice and informative but also told me straight-up that she wasn’t as well versed on EDS as she’d like but that she’d done a lot of research leading up to our appointment.

We talked for a bit about EDS and MCAS in general, before discussing how I’ve been handling my dysphagia by myself.

She told me I was already doing everything she’d tell me to do and unless I wanted to do a barium swallow study (possibly not a good idea with MCAS) there wasn’t much else she’d recommend, and it seemed like I had a good handle on it.

I appreciated that honesty and expressed thankfulness to know I was already doing all the right things.

Got home a few hours ago and saw my mychart had updated with some test results. Checked those, then on a whim checked the summary notes from the speech therapist.

Top line of the summary just says, “Patient knows more than me.”

I mean, A+ for humility, I guess 😂

[callmearcturus]

✈️

so this is a remix/companion piece to a fic @arquiving is working on. we're using a lot of the same assets, telling different stories. you should all know the epigraph at the start is:

"Hey, Austin?" "Yeah?" "Do you wanna know what the weak point of a mech is?" "Yeah, what's the weak point of a mech?" "The fucking pilot."

— Jack de Quidt, Austin Walker, The Road To PARTIZAN

The story is, basically

I actually have no idea how to explain it, so here's some excerpts I wrote for either my version of the story or @arquiving

\\\ PATCH NOTES FOR F-14 MECHANIZED COMBAT APPARATUS MCA-012, DESIGNATION MAVERICK.

Retrofitting to F18 specs completed July 02, 2022. Comms upgrade completed, along with hardware alterations to accommodate them. Engine upgraded from V9.0 to V10.8 dual-compatible.

Retrofit marked SUCCESSFUL with following caveats:

> Cockpit depth within apparatus reduced but not currently within acceptable range for F18 safety compliance. Upgrade partially complete.

> Standardized rigging of anchor lines found repeatedly incompatible with apparatus chassis. Adjusted anchor line mounts engineered. Fourth iteration of improvised mounts found to be stable. Report from MCA Technician Corp suggests "do not adjust again, no better options found, current setup slightly precarious." Upgrade partially complete.

> After seven attempts to introduce new SC-84-18990 formulation, discovered Apparatus anatomy will not tolerate new compliant Seele conductant and will forcibly expel through vents, requiring full decontamination and cleaning. See appendix 17 for  further detail. Upgrade declined.

> Attempts to remove secondary cockpit failed. Upgrade declined.

> Attempts to install automated secondary cockpit violently rejected by apparatus anatomy. Upgrade declined.

MCA-012, designation MAVERICK, classified as single-pilot apparatus. Please note WSO "second seat" is present but is not to be used under any circumstances. See Warrant Office Coleman with any inquiries.

=

Bradley remembered when the Naming happened.

It was kind of funny, the way the Navy had gotten first crack at the Exclusion Zones. When Bradley was back in Basic, it was a frequent point of discussion and low-brow humor. When Phoenix— just Nat back then— had mentioned she was getting sent to the Tanager Outpost, Bradley had asked her if she was packing a swimsuit.

"It's 300 miles from any body of water," Nat had groused. "Remember when we were the boat people, Bradshaw?"

Truly, Bradley didn't, and he knew Nat didn't either. Both of them were too young to remember before the Zones appeared. The Navy of old existed on celluloid and in history books. Hell, back when Bradley was in high school, the textbooks hadn't even been updated with all that shit. He wondered if kids in AP World History had to learn the names of the Zones or the order they had opened in.

But that may have been 300 years ago for all that it mattered now.

Bradley had always hoped he'd get assigned to the mech corps when he was in Annapolis. Between his last name and the fact he had Admiral Kazansky's phone number in his contacts, he thought he might get in. But Bradley also knew how few MCAs existed, and the Navy didn't let you opt-into the pilot program. You either passed the aptitude test or you didn't.

The test had been a fucking blood test. Someone took four vials of his blood and walked away with them, and nobody told him shit.

Everyone's results were classified.

Bridewell was not the first base Bradley had been stationed at, but the third, after Yokosuka. He'd put in his time watching monitors as Seresin ran underwater drills in his MCA, keeping an eye on the sync rate.

He'd been on duty when Seresin had broken the 90 percent threshold and had started laughing over his monitor. "Yokosuka, tell the techs to break out the stencils and spray paint. MCA-zero-four-niner's designation is HANGMAN."

Of course it had been HANGMAN. "How the hell do you deal with that cockpit," Rooster had asked Hangman over ice cold asahi at the local pilot bar.

"Ain't as bad as it looks," Hangman had said with an almost fond smile. "I know my boy's going to protect me."

"Boy?" Bradley grew up hearing men call their favorite car milady and ships were still consider old broads. The specificity had caught his ear.

"Hm? Yeah. Or, closer to that than anything." Hangman had tilted his bottle against the tabletop, letting it roll along the curve of the glass. "They don't tell you that part. Maybe because most of the people writing the manual can't break a fifty on their synch ratio, so they don't even know. But the mech has ideas of what it is. You just gotta listen."

After Yokosuka, Bradley was back in the states, Bridewell Forward Operating Base, right outside of the Gateway Exclusion Zone. No one called it St. Louis anymore, just Bridewell if you were military or Gateway if you were a civilian.

Bradley was piloting MCA-059 when it all went to shit. 059 was an odd bird, slow ambulation with its awkward hip joints, but the legs were… different. As his sync rate climbed, he could feel the massive shock absorbers around his ankles, how his femurs were hydraulics. 059 was fitted for urban landscapes, it was built to actually maneuver around the buildings and the streets.

Shutting his eyes, Bradley inhaled, mouth and lungs full of Seele conductant. Holding it inside, he listened to the low thudding ping of his sync ratio rising. He counted until his synch settled at 57 percent.

"Lieutenant," his comms officer hailed over the radio. "We have a report from the tower, there's a fluctuation over by the riverside, south of the I-65."

"What kind of fluctuation? Something big wander out?" The majority of his work around Gateway was just making sure nothing from the Zone crossed the Mississippi. Plenty of people still insisted on living in Gateway for reasons Bradley had never understood. 

"Information is currently incomplete, but marked as urgent. Setting guidance."

Coordinates updated in the cockpit, and Bradley felt the faint tug of that way, already pulling his mech around. Turning his grip on the controls, 069 sank down, sinking below the skyline. At 30 percent power, Bradley let the line snap like releasing a rubber band, and he launched up into the air.

Wind rushed by him as he soared in a narrow arc, landing on a rooftop. From here, he could see down the river.

"What the hell is that?" he murmured as the opalline green-blue sheen of the Zone wall curled and twisted into nonsensical kaleidoscopes.

He had eyes on it when the wall just ruptured, split like a worn seam. Underneath was more shimmering Zone wall, spilling out from the break like silk in water, spurting across the river. As it landed on the Missouri-side, it filled out, the wrinkles smoothing out as it stretched.

"Zone wall anomaly, the Zone has breached the river boundary," Bradley called out, twisting his throttle sharply. 059's thighs folded down into its calves, pressure building.

This time Bradley didn't aim up, he pushed forward, rocketing over to anomaly with such force, his body slammed back fully into his pilot's seat.

It was the Gateway Zone Expansion, the first of its kind. Usually Zones didn't get wider, just deeper.

Much later, Bradley would be questioned extensively about what he saw, the shape of the growth, how quickly it had spread and whether the spread had felt directed, bullshit like that. But in the moment, Bradley hurled himself and his mech into action.

There was no way to stop the expansion, so Bradley followed it, spire jumping along the boundary. As FRM began to wander out into the city streets, he fell on them, grasping every weird-ass creature with his metal hands and redirecting them back into the veil.

His brain was alight with waypoints and blooms of information, and he continued the crash his thousand-ton body into the streets, the hydraulic tension in his legs becoming easier to take each time.

There was no moment of epiphany, no trip through the Star Gate, just— ROOSTER. He felt the connection like a breeze through his hair. MCA-059 was ROOSTER, or they were ROOSTER, it was complicated.

"Lieutenant Bradshaw, your synchronicity is unstable. Please return to baseline," a MCA technician said over the comms.

"I'm fine," Rooster said. "I— I just, it was the thing, I—" He glanced over at the monitor.

72%. Personal best. He breathed in and felt his chest expand, his shoulders rolling back, the accentuators powering, shifting the mech's limbs with him.

He exhaled slowly. "Uh, status update. MCA-059 should probably be designated ROOSTER. Yeah, Re-engaging FRM." Twisting the throttle, he soared.

=

\\US NAVAL MECHANIZED COMBAT APPARATUS CORPS TOPSHEET \\CANDIDATE PROFILE \\LT BRADLEY BRADSHAW

STATIONED AT BRIDEWELL NAVAL FORWARD BASE, OUTSIDE THE GATEWAY EXCLUSION ZONE

MCA Pilot Proficiency Test conducted during tenure at Annapolis. Results in second percentile. Stationed with MCA Corp to monitor for future placement.

Assigned to Gateway Perimeter Guard and on duty during an unexplained Zone expansion. Earned multiple commendations for efforts aiding civilian evacuation and redirecting FRMs away from evacuation routes.

Permanently assigned to MCA-059, "ROOSTER."

Recommended for Special Detachment by Admiral Thomas Kazansky. Reassignment to Tanager Outpost pending.