#medical malpractice md

[transjudas]

You have enough for both of us?

[thechy-fychannel]

I saw a few other blogs doing this so I thought I'd share my input on what I think would happen in the House MD universe in 2024:

the constant jokes abt house and wilson's relationship turns into the fellows jokingly writing fanfic abt their boss and his boy best friend. somewhere along the way they all get very serious abt the quality of it and it turns into a Whole Thing, a 150k+ novel that they vow to take to their graves.

house discovers the fic by accident and sends it to wilson. wilson discovers things abt himself and then he and house discover each other shortly thereafter.

house purposefully posts the fic online and credits the fellows by their entire full names so it embarrasses them more than house and wilson. It's never spoken abt again but it gets way more online attention than any of them expected.

wilson doesn't get how the Cloud works and accidentally uploads his and house's nudes to the google nest hub on his desk. He doesn't notice it until one of his sweet little old lady cancer patients points it out to him during their appointment. He throws the google nest hub into his trash can until he can figure out how to get the naked pictures off of it.

house has an alexa and abuses the hell out of it. sometimes ppl hear him screaming at someone in his office, only to walk in and find a robotic voice replying with "sorry, I didn't get that" and house throws it off the balcony.

wilson gets addicted to online shopping. house has to stage an intervention bc they do not have enough room in their closet for another pair of prada loafers and their kitchen is full of shitty gadgets that wilson bought off temu or something.

some right wing social media influencer comes in with a mysterious illness and ends up getting castrated as part of the solution. 13 personally does the procedure herself and house watches like a proud dad.

a patient reveals chase's grindr by shoving his phone at him and asking "is this you?" abt the headless profile with the ripped abs that says Dr. Feel Good, 0 feet away, in front of the rest of the team.

foreman finds the team doing tiktok dances bc house told them to learn it in order to understand their 15 yr old patient better.

chase medically murders mitch mcconnel and the entire hospital celebrates ding dong the witch is dead style.

there's a whole episode where house faces his transphobia bc of a trans patient that he connects with. the patient tells him to fuck off and go face his own problems instead of pretending to make it right by being nice to one trans person. And house does, even if he's not perfect, he really tries to do better.

13 gets her medical marijuana card and accidentally becomes the team's plug. her main customer is wilson who still supplies it to certain terminal patients. She hears "hey, can I hit your pen?" at least four times a day.

foreman buys a tesla and it blows up in the parking lot. they spend the entire episode trying to figure out who tried to kill foreman, but it turns out that teslas just do that sometimes.

there's an episode where house finds out that netflix is removing his favorite obscure tv show that ran for 2 seasons in 2002 and wilson recruits the team to hunt down a dvd copy of it without house finding out. they somehow manage to find one and spend a ridiculous amount of money on it, only to open the dvd case and find a copy of the porno wilson starred in that one time instead of the dvd of the show. park saves the day at the last minute by finding a copy of it in a box of dvds in her parents house.

[malpracticinghomosexual]

they fell asleep watching the L Word

[cowpokezuko]

Worst Toxic Workplace Polycule

Been watching a lot of House MD and Torchwood and I would like to pose a question to the good people of tumblr.

Which toxic workplace polycule is worse?

please rb for a larger sample size.

[crucifiedramblings]

GREGORY HOUSE— plus size partner headcanons

nsfw under the cut. minors dni.

this is quite literally my favorite concept ever as a plus-sized individual, but here are some general things i think house would do in a relationship with a chubby/plus-sized partner <3 nsfw headcanons under the cut ✭

not to say house has never dated someone bigger than him before, but it wasn't something he really paid attention to. let's be real here, he would definitely make a comment or two regarding your "well endowed backside"

house is definitely a thigh man— the more you have, the happier he'll be

when the two of you cuddle in bed, house will gingerly tuck his hands under your thighs— this time, in a non-suggestive way— soaking up your excess heat through his palms, burying his face into the soft plushness of your chest

in the morning, house will find himself splayed across your torso— face down against your sternum. he'll lie there for a while, listening to your soft breaths and enjoying the warmth

if you're ever worried about being on top— don't. house will shut down any irrational fear before it even starts.

"what are you talking about?" house glanced up at you from his eagerly seated position on the mattress. you shook your head with flushed cheeks, embarrassment flooding in.

"i just— i don't want to hurt you. your leg." the last part is said more quietly, as though it was an insult to even bring it up. house, however, let out a wheezy laugh in response; slapping his good thigh, he slowly got up onto his knees, gently grasping your hands in his own.

"sweetheart— you could fuck me so hard that my other leg decides to give out mid-stroke— i'd die an incredibly grateful man." house chuckled, shaking his head with a wide grin. "now— please— sit on my dick before it loses interest. i'm not in my twenties anymore— there's a time limit!"

when house is fucking you especially hard, he is more than thankful for the extra grip on your hips

as said before, he is a thigh man— when house is eating you out, clamping your thighs around his head is his own personal heaven

house likes seeing your ass ripple when he gives it a good smack <3

[h-harleybaby]

I don’t care what anyone says Wilson has big beautiful brown puppy dog eyes and I wanna kiss his forehead like hello pretty man 🫶😍

[ifuckcigarettes]

[yn-addams]

More house md in 2024

Cameron, Chase and Foreman had a threesome, and it wasn't drunk. They regularly get together and have movies nights and etc they’re in love

Chase has a crush on house and foreman and Cameron constantly tease him about it. I think that house likes him too and Wilson teases him but house is emotionally constipated so he denies it.

eventually while Wilson is finalizing one of his many divorces and living in a hotel, Chase comes over to house’s apartment and they drunkenly bond over trauma and daddy issues (probably around the episode where chases father comes) and then they kiss.

house freaks the fuck out and avoids Chase and Wilson

Chase also freaks the fuck out and avoids Wilson and house

Wilson, Cameron and foreman make a plane to get them to get together

they are both confused as fuck as to why they all did this but because both f them got their respective significant other’s permission they go along with it.

the next day they both come in to work with a smile on their faces and both of them are limping (house limping slightly harder than normal, and Chase is wearing a very ugly scarf for the rest of the day. ____

I had to include my new favourite ship into this one guys sorry 😅. Also not all of these headcanons will line up most of these are just thoughts that pop into my head

[jellifishiez]

did I share these here yet? I thought malpractice MD side of tumblr would enjoy these doodles of mine

[megachadanakin]

💀

[asclexe]

house at school !!

i got a 95 on my math test btw

[itsoveranakin-ihavethehighground]

ok so house spends an entire episode telling wilson he can't let other people define him and that he needs to chose a piece of furniture that he likes and wants and the thing that wilson gets is an organ for house

no yeah i'm totally chill about this you're the one going batshit insane over wilsom choosing house's pleasure as the thing that defies what are you on about

[kiddbegins]

Guys can you imagine being Wilson’s close friend and being in love with him but he’s married and you can’t do anything about it so you just try and pretend those feelings don’t exist and it works for a while but then he’s drunk out one night and instead of calling his wife he calls you to pick him up. And you do because, it’s James Wilson come on.. and you let him crash at your place but the entire ride back there he’s just gazing at you, and looking at you because he also loves you but knows he’s married so he can’t do anything either.

and it just festers in the worst way possible, and youre both laying in your bed, inches away and he just reaches over, tucking hair behind your ear as he gazes at you. you dont know what hes going to say. going to do. then he hits you with "i wish things were different," in such a low, soft and quiet voice that your entire chest clenches so tight just hearing it.

everything in you is telling you not to enable whatever it is that he's going to go on about but at the same time, you've wanted this. him. but you respect his wife too much to do anything real so you just nod, maybe give a soft "yeah, me too," before telling him to go to sleep and that you'll be there in the morning. but the second he falls asleep you slip out to the living room because your heart physically hurts from how much you love him and you cant be in the same room as him anymore.

anyway….. oh to be loved my james evan wilson…

[malpracticinghomosexual]

no way this hasn’t been done before but… 🤲

[sentrys]

[ask-the-ducklings]

ask the ducklings anything!

hellor!! house wanted us us to start a tumblr, probably so he can spy on us, so here we are!!

*disclaimer, this is NOT the actual house md fellows, this is a silly guy on the internet pretending to be them

answered and moderated by cameron (they/them) ⭐️ (@asclexe is my main blog)

please read the rules below! <33

RULES FOR ASKS (/ooc):

-keep it pg-13, the person who is running this blog is a minor!

-please specify who you’re asking, it can be just one fellow, two, or all of them. be specific <33

-if you’re not asking a question, or even if you are, please be nice!

my answer will have their name and a color/style to indicate who is answering it, here’s the legend! :

foreman

chase

cameron

thirteen

taub

kutner

park

masters

adams

bonus:

amber

please be patient after you have already sent an ask!! i am a full time high school student, i’m always in at least one play/musical, and life happens.

some posts maybe me ooc/updates on the blog, but all reblogs, follows, and likes will come from my main. this post for example is ooc, and it will likely by edited as stuff changes.

so yeah, that’s all! send in your asks!