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cinnamostar · 8 months

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four dates to fall in love

part one. part two. part three. part four (here). part five. part six coming soon.

pairing : hyunjin x gn!reader

summary : after a two year long unspoken hatred, hyunjin and you are forced to be costars in a romantic series, but when it comes to filming any of the romance scenes, you both utterly fail and are unable to get through your lines. the director threatens to take your roles away if you two aren't able to get past this within the next week, which spawns the genius idea from both your managers: can you learn to (fake) fall in love in seven dates and save your careers?

wc : 2.7k

cw : actor!au, enemies to lovers ?!, slowburn , not proofread, blood/knife ments (no injury, theyre just cooking lol), emotional vulnerability

a/n : welcome to part four. the slow burn is absolutely slowburning. things are happening. i dont have much to say other than it being hard for me to write, but pls let me know what you think!!!!!! likes and reblogs appreciated!

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“It went well?” Chan exclaimed in shock over your speakerphone.

You hum in agreement, confusion in the forefront of your mind, “Surprisingly, it went better than I could have ever imagined,” a sigh escapes you, “I don’t know, it’s weird.”

“Well, the fact he even apologized caught me off guard in the first place.”

You laugh lightly, “Oh, trust me, I still am having a hard time believing it. It’s been so long of him being an asshole to me, so seeing him like this was… very different. A little scary, if I’m being honest.”

“Yet it still went well even though it was kinda weird?”

“I mean, it was really awkward at the start which was annoying, but I can’t blame him. He genuinely did look like he felt bad, so it probably was hard to be in his position,” you think aloud, “But it was getting too much and he was putting a damper on the mood, so I tried to make him more comfortable, which worked. Then we started talking, and I don’t really know how to say it, but it felt… really nice? It made me realize that maybe I did miss our friendship.”

“Well, you guys did get along really well before everything happened. To be honest, I thought there was something more going on before then,” Chan recalls, “Though, his sudden change made me realize I was way off.”

Your eyebrows furrow at Chan’s comment, “Something more? Like romantic?”

He chuckles from the other end of the line, “Yeah, I thought something was going on between you two. You guys just seemed to click really well, better than any other costar you’ve had in the past, even to this day. Lowkey thought it was going to be a Tom Holland and Zendaya moment.”

“Jesus,” you mutter, “Definitely not that, I never thought of him that way.”

“You say that, but I remember the heart eyes you used to look at him with,” he teases.

“Oh, shut up. I did not. Besides, that’s not what’s important in the present time!”

He rolls his eyes, even though you couldn’t see it, you could feel it in his tone, “Yeah, yeah, whatever you say. You’re right though, it is a difficult situation for both of you to be in. Other than it being uncomfortable, how are you feeling about it?”

You let out a heavy sigh, “I mean, part of me is happy to be able to have a normal relationship with him, but… I’m still really mad at him for how he treated me. I don’t think it’s something I can let go of yet.”

“That’s okay. You have time to process all of that, no one is rushing you.”

“I know, but for a moment yesterday, I kinda forgot about all that. I had fun with him, and I want to keep having fun, but then I remember everything and feel so… upset that I am even letting him back into my life, even if it's for a bit.”

“Huh…” Chan muddles over your words for a moment, “That is quite the dilemma. I think you have every right to be upset at him, but I also think it’s okay if you miss your friend. I just think you have to figure out what kind of boundaries you want to set for yourself then. I think you can still have a nice time with him without him earning your forgiveness just yet. He can be a surface level friend or acquaintance until he proves himself trustworthy again.”

“You’re right, but I just didn’t like how easily it slipped my mind. Part of me feels like I should still be more on guard and not as friendly, but he makes that hard too.”

“Y/N, it’ll be okay,” he reassures, “You’ll figure it out, but it’s perfectly fine for you to have fun, while still having boundaries, okay?”

You sigh, still a bit unconvinced by his words, “I guess…”

“I know it’s hard, I can’t imagine what it's like to be in your position, but I promise it will be okay.”

“I’ll believe you just this once!”

“You say that every time, but sure, just this once. Call you tomorrow, alright?”

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It was the next evening, and you were anxiously waiting in your apartment for Hyunjin to arrive. You weren’t sure how today was going to go, and the idea Changbin had for you both today made you nervous, as it felt as a far more intimate setting than the previous dates. Although, you couldn’t entirely argue with his logic. Today, he suggested that you both cooked a simple dinner with each other, the idea being that it would help you both learn how to work together towards a common goal, which was dinner in this case.

Despite you being able to understand the logic behind his idea, it was incredibly intimidating to think about having Hyunjin in your own home, especially considering the sudden change in dynamic in your relationship. Even then, you didn’t just let anyone into your home, as you only ever had your closest friends come over for small hang outs, so this was far outside of your comfort zone, but perhaps that was a good thing. Maybe going out of your comfort zone with Hyunjin would only help you both succeed the next time you found yourselves on set, and perhaps something as intimate as cooking together would help you both ease into your roles.

A knock on the door wakes you from your thoughts, prompting you to shuffle hurriedly towards the door to open it for none other than Hyunjin. He greets you with a gentle smile, bowing his head slightly as you let him in wordlessly. There is an awkwardness that hangs in the atmosphere, indicating that you both were uncomfortable with today’s plans and he, too, was likely struggling to find the right words to say.

You take a deep breath in, almost as if you were catching your breath, “Welcome to my place!” You cringe internally at yourself, unable to handle the intensity of the awkwardness between you two and how poor your attempt was to disperse it.

“It’s really nice!” he compliments, standing in place by the entrance after removing his shoes.

“Thank you,” you respond, “Uhm, just follow me, the kitchen is this way. And all the ingredients are ready for us to use, Changbin had them delivered.”

Hyunjin follows you into the kitchen, his eyes taking in every detail around him, filling him with delight to see how characteristic of you the apartment was, it being a perfect representation of your personality. “What are we making again? I don’t think Changbin filled me in.”

“Oh, we’re just making curry udon! It’s something I’ve made before and it’s not too hard. My bad, I didn’t tell Changbin what we were making which is probably why he didn’t tell you. All I did was send him an ingredient list.”

“I forgot you like cooking,” he replies as he stops in your kitchen, quickly turning to the sink to wash his hands.

You hum in response, washing your hands after him, “I think it can be relaxing, but uh, if you want you can start with chopping the carrots and potatoes? I’ll handle the onion and garlic.” Hyunjin nods and follows your orders without much trouble, or so you think, until you turn around and see him holding the knife in a very precarious and questionable manner. Your eyes widen as you rush towards, “Oh my god, that is not how you should be trying to cut a potato. Have you not chopped a veggie in your entire life?”

He smiles sheepishly, shrugging his shoulders, “Listen, I don’t do this cooking thing often,” a gentle chuckle leaving him as he takes amusement in your concern, his heart thumping over the sudden proximity you both now shared.

“I-,” you sigh with a baffled expression, “Okay, let me just show you because I am not having you accidentally bleeding out all over my counter.”

“You’re more worried about your counters than me?”

“Shut up,” you suppress a laugh before softly whispering, “Here, just do it like this,” you reach over and lay your hands atop of his without second thought, guiding him on how to position his hands without the risk of injury. Once you’ve become aware of how your bodies are pressed up against each other from the side, you jump away in an instant, “That’s it! That’s all you gotta do.” You’re quick to avoid eye contact with him, turning towards your own cutting board as you chastise yourself for being so careless with him at that moment.

Hyunjin’s face and ears were soon dusted with a soft pink, heat rushing across his body over the interaction that seemed so natural, but manages to mutter out a quiet ‘thank you’ before trying his knife skills out once more. Despite your momentary embarrassment, you are sure to take sneaky peaks at Hyunjin to make sure he was handling himself well. You move on from chopping and turn your attention to seasoning the chicken while Hyunjin was still focused on the vegetables, going at a leisurely place which you much preferred in this case.

The rest of cooking goes on in silence aside from the occasional instruction or question, small witty jokes, and touches that seemed to linger more than necessary, but perhaps that was your imagination. Once everything was done, you both sat across from each other, admiring the fruits of your shared labor that was now plated in front of you both.

“It looks really good!” Hyunjin comments enthusiastically, a wide, toothy grin spreading across his face.

“It does, right? Let’s eat!”

Neither you miss a beat, taking a huge bite of the udon noodles, letting out a delighted groan over just how flavorful the food was. “Woah,” Hyunjin groans out, surprise at how well tonight had gone thus far with the added victory of food, “Holy shit, this is so yummy.”

“Mhmm,” you mumble out between slurping noodles, “This is better than when I make it on my own.”

“It’s the Hyunjin special that you’ve been missing this whole time,” he says matter-of-factly with a smug smile.

“You’re being pretty bold for a guy who just learned how to hold a knife today,” you tease, playfully sticking your tongue out. Your eyes catch each other for a moment between your fits of giggles, time stopping for the briefest second possible before you both avert your eyes out of nerves. What was that? You thought frantically to yourself, suddenly hyper aware of the strange warmth in your stomach that was also accompanied with the feeling of your stomach dropping. It was an uncomfortable feeling, one you didn’t know how to explain or ever experienced before, but you did know you didn’t want that combination of symptoms again for whatever emotion this was. You clear your throat, taking a sip of water as if it would wash away the discomfort, “I guess we are pretty good, huh? Maybe our acting project has hope if we are able to work this well together,” you joke, a very poor, if not disastrous, attempt to alleviate the awkwardness that seemed to follow you everywhere these days.

Your words stab Hyunjin in the heart, the guilt he had once forgotten was knocking at the door of his heart, forcing itself in without his permission. His entire demeanor deflated the moment those words left your lips, his heart writhing at the reminder that the only reason this situation existed was because of him and his blinding stupidity. Yet, here you are, warmly inviting into your home and treating him as if he was an old friend of the past, as if he had never wounded you and he couldn’t help but wonder if he was deserving of any of this. He stood still, gulping down his food before faintly whispering a hushed apology.

“I’m sorry.”

Your head snaps back up, your eyebrows furrowing with worry once you sense the sadness lacing his trembling voice, his head now turned downwards as if he was trying to mask his state. Perhaps the joke was a little too soon, you thought, now it being your turn to feel bad. “Ah, Hyunjin, I’m sorry-” you apologize hurriedly, “It was just a joke, please don’t take it too seriously. I’m sorry.”

He forces a smile, waving his hand as if to tell you to not worry about it, the words at the forefront of his tongue, but caught in his throat due to the heaviness sinking in his chest. Once again, shame paralyzed his body, the warm sensation behind his eyes reminding him to blink, reminding him he shouldn’t be so selfish in his pain when he was the cause of so much discomfort. Was any of this okay? Was any of this right? He wonders to himself, still unable to find forgiveness within himself.

“Hyunjin,” you speak tenderly, your hand reaching across the table to touch his arm, grounding him back in the present, “I promise, it’s okay.” You knew that last bit was a lie, but it was for his own sake and comfort at this point. His treatment, his behavior, his attitude – none of it was ever okay, but you decided to ignore your own feelings and prioritize his. For the first time in two years, you cared about how he felt, you finally cared how your words harmed him, when before all you ever aimed for was a strike to his heart, but today, you chose to comfort his heart that your words unintentionally wounded. Although, your own heart and conscience briefly argued for a moment, one wanting to tend to his hurt, while the other demanded you let him rot in his misery, insisting he deserved it for what he had put you through. It was a tug-of-war you weren’t enjoying, you had almost wished you two remained in your heated hatred for one another and that nothing ever changed. Despite what your mind screamed at you, you chose to listen to your heart, you chose him over yourself.

He takes a deep breath in, trying to collect himself before speaking, “I just–,” a heavy exhale escapes him, “I’m just sorry. I just feel really, really, really bad for everything, but I also feel like I’m not allowed to feel bad when I was the one to hurt you.”

His eyes met yours, the glassiness of his eyes conveying the depth of his guilt, “Oh, Hyunjin,” you whisper apologetically, “Listen, I won’t lie to you, what you did was shitty. You did hurt me, but that is in the past. You feeling bad about it means you’re a good person, right? It means you’re human and that you care, but I don’t want you to let your guilt overwhelm you either.”

It was a genuine response in a moment of sudden vulnerability, your response taking him aback, but the words temporarily placating his never ending thoughts, “I guess, but… I don’t know if I can forgive myself,” he mumbles.

“You don’t have to yet, but you can learn to eventually,” you reply, “I understand it’s hard, and even I still need more time to do that myself, but I do think you deserve to be kind to yourself.” None of that was a lie, you did truly believe he was deserving of his own compassion, but his culpability helped you see the humanity in him. The spitefulness you once knew him for nowhere to be found, but instead there was only a guilt-ridden man who carried a world of humiliation. “I think I can learn to do so soon, too. Spending time with you helps. Besides, I did miss being friends with you if I’m being honest.”

The last sentence causes him to perk up, a small, satisfied smile playing onto your lips, “Really?” he asks, his ears barely believing your words, but his heart was swelling with hope. His eyes search yours, he can’t help but notice how they glimmer under the soft lowlights of your home, and for some reason, he finds warmth and comfort in them. He knows he can trust you, he knows you are being as candor as possible.

“Really, I mean it.”

“I missed it too.”

“Well, I’ll do my best to learn to trust you again. I’ll learn to forgive you eventually, just for now, it still hurts.”

“I’m sorry. I’ll learn too.”

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taglist: @kopikokrunch @icouldntcareless22 @kidrauhlschik @hhwangsmoon @lestayzone @vixensss @cupidcures @sleepyxxhead @pinkpunkdynamite @kaiyaba taglist cut off at 20 people :)

#cinnamostar writes #skz imagines #stray kids x reader #skz x reader #skz fanfic #skz scenarios #stray kids hyunjin #stray kids scenarios #stray kids x you #hyunjin x reader #hwang hyunjin x reader #hwang hyunjin fanfic #hwang hyunjin #hyunjin #stray kids #stray kids fanfic #hyunjin fic #hyunjin imagines #skz slowburn

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stevieschrodinger · 11 months

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Part Two

Part One

Eddie sits in his van, and he cries about it. He cries so much the already tangled mess of yarn in his hands becomes nothing but a colourful blur. He knows a lot of this is hormones; his neglected Omega falling further and further into depression.

If he neglects his Omega much more, another heat spent alone might actually kill him. Eddie vaguely recognises he's far enough gone that simply not waking up one day sounds kind of nice.

He bought the most expensive yarn he could afford. He knew it wasn't good enough for a pups blanket, but he just couldn't afford the nicer stuff. Yarn is fucking expensive.

So yeah, he got the cheaper stuff, attracted to the colours as much as anything, even knowing he'd have to double it over to make it thick enough to knit. And that was how the trouble started because doubling it over meant unspooling the whole thing.

And now it's just another thing Eddie has fucked up.

He's not a good Omega, he knows that, he's been told it his entire life; too brash, too loud, too imaginative, not good at cooking and cleaning and organising and all the stuff Omega are supposed to naturally be good at.

Which if he didn't care, then it wouldn't matter, but Eddie wants a pup. Wants one like it's a burning urge inside him. Wants to carry one, wants to make another person who's a part of him. His Omega whines and whines and whines and Eddie wants it. Wants it enough that he tries to be a good Omega; he just always fucks it up.

And that makes it so much worse.

Some of the Omega in senior year are already mated, already walking around with bites proudly displayed on their necks. Fancy Omega with good breeding and nice families who have chosen Alphas for them. Which, sure, Eddie's not sure he'd like to have an Alpha picked for him, but to have a pup of his own? Eddie would put up with a lot.

One girl is already pregnant, everyone congratulating her and celebrating with her; as soon as she started to show Eddie found he couldn't even look at her any more, the envy was eating him alive.

But it'll never be for him.

They're supposed to make pup blankets in Omega class and Eddie can't even afford the fluffy yarn. He's already failed.

And then Eddie nearly shits himself when someone bangs on the driver side window. He's been ugly crying, and he tries to wipe his eyes and snotty nose to see who it is, winding the window down. Steve Harrington; fucking wonderful.

"Hey, man, look, are you, okay?"

"Fine," Eddie answers, clearly not at all fine, one hand smeared in snot and the other wound so tight in the fucked up yarn his fingers are turning white.

Steve sees it, "do you, want a hand with that?"

"I don't think there's any saving it." Eddie says, defeated, but it was unexpectedly decent of Harrington to offer so he tacks on, "thanks."

"I was just here, late, you know, shooting some practice hoops, maybe if we go in the gym we could spread it out, maybe?"

Eddie just stares at him for a minute, because this is the nicest anyone's been to Eddie for ages and it's coming from and Alpha which just makes it that much worse so Eddie just...nods. Finds himself following Harrington into the gym.

They work in silence for a while, and at Steve's suggestion, they do end up cutting the yarn once to make it easier.

"Thankyou."

"No worries man, I knew we could do it, what's it for?"

"Omega studies," Eddie mumbles at the gym floor, "pup blanket"

"Ah, right, that's cool, Why'd you pick it? I like the colours."

And in what universe is Steve Harrington making idle conversation with Eddie Munson, "was all I could afford," Eddie admits, shame faced.

"They make you buy it?" Steve's frowning, "even though it's for a grade?"

Eddie just nods, and then shrugs.

"Oh, well what did your Alpha think?"

Eddie snorts, can't help it, the ridiculousness of it, "I don't have an Alpha," Eddie declares, much more loudly than he'd really ment to.

"Oh. I just figured...I mean you're so pretty. You must get plenty of offers."

Eddie just...stares at Steve. He must have fallen and hit his head, surely. It's the only explanation for what's happening here, Eddie laughs again, "sure, if I want to get on my knees in the bathroom." Which is true, Eddie gets plenty of offers, just not any he'd like to participate in. He's going to loose his virginity to an Alpha who cares for him, in a nest that Alpha built, even if it kills him.

Which it just might, if he goes through another heat alone. He sees the way Wayne looks at him, the worry in his eyes. He knows he's not well, but he's just going to ignore it. There's nothing else to be done.

"Oh," Steve says, he looks uncomfortable but then he ploughs on anyway, "you do smell...well, I...I can tell you're maybe not doing so hot."

Great. Time for Eddie to fucking bail on this. He's hit his limit on Steve Harrington pity for the day.

It's the next day when Eddie finds a paper bag hanging from the windshield of his van. There's five skeins of yarn inside; dark blue, a little sparkly, and the softest thing Eddie's ever felt. He looks around to see who could have done this; across the car park Steve Harrington gives him a shy, two finger wave.

#eddie munson #stranger things #steve harrington #steddie #alpha steve harrington #omega eddie because he's so pretty #omega eddie munson #pre getting together #suicidal ideation #ao3 author #ao3 writer #fan fiction #my fic #ficlet #knitting

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boynextdoorcoverpoison · 4 months

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myung jaehyun is absolutely, hands down, the best leader for boynextdoor.

I always stand by the leader of groups being the best leaders for their groups, but it’s definitely a role that they have to grow into and improve constantly on. just like any other position in the group. just like any other thing you do.

that said, until the fanmeeting, I didn’t quite have the words to truly express why I feel so strongly about jaehyun’s role as the boynextdoor leader—especially as I think to a lot of non-onedoor, it can seem a bit confusing or not apparent at first. which mostly comes from jaehyun sitting outside the norm for a leader (particularly in hybe bgs) at least in personality.

jaehyun is loud. that’s like… something well known about him. he’s talkative and playful and despite being shy, he’s definitely the kind of person to enter the room knowing no one and leave with at least 5 new friends. his approach to people is one that feels very open and bright.

for this reason, I do think many people might not first associate him with the leader role. with most groups, the most energetic member is probably not the first considered as “oh yeah that’s the leader”. jaehyun is all the playful and energy-filled that usually comes with the member who the leader needs to keep an eye on the most and eventually has a bunch of youtube compilation videos.

that said, these qualities are exactly why I think he makes such a great leader for boynextdoor. as mentioned in the fanmeeting day 2 ending ments, the members of bonedo are the type of people to put up a straight face and keep their struggles to themselves. as woonhak and they have expressed, an example being woonhak putting on a smile and performing, despite dealing with grief. they’re very much the people to not make their problems someone else’s and to maintain a collected image in front of others.

while I also think jaehyun does this, as most people who are leaders may tend to for the sake of their groups, he’s also very very very unapologetically himself. he feels so much. his tendency to cry being a prime example of that, though not the only. the point is that jaehyun is expressive and open and in this, jaehyun contrasts with his members.

as woonhak has stated before, jaehyun has expressed that it’s okay for him to cry, to need to take a break, to sit this one out. jaehyun in general approaches his members with a lot of care. but overall, the stand out is that I believe jaehyun navigates along the lines of… feelings are meant to be felt. he has no qualms with any emotion being felt the way it occurs to us. yes there are ways to handle them, but ultimately, the feeling—whatever it may be—is there to be felt and expressed.

this is also seen in how he interacts with his members. in his very tactile approach to express the love and care he has for the rest of bonedo. the pride he feels for them. whatever words I’m not able to formulate to describe the whole yeppi exchange between him and sungho in the 3rd comeback show special.

it’s also in his loudness and energy. it’s all about expression. he’s so much, but it only feels that way, in my opinion, because he’s overwhelmingly unafraid and unapologetic of being himself, in a way that the industry might otherwise discourage. he’s not against expressing how he feels and while it likely won’t be the most apparent until later in their careers, I do think he’s the type to speak his mind.

all that said, the point is that these qualities do exist in contrast to his members and thus… encourage them to do the same. maybe not to be speeding around all over the place, but rather to allow themselves the space and time to feel as they do. that they don’t have to keep it all inside to avoid making it other peoples problems. they’re a team, if nothing else. and it’s in jaehyun being so so so much himself, being exactly the person he is, not something specially crafted to fit a particular image, he encourages the other members to be the same.

jaehyun helps to curate a safe space within their group by exhibiting that there’s nothing wrong with being the person they are. to feel whatever they feel. to express when things are going good or bad or somewhere in between. to approach things as they come and take them in stride, even if it’s without prior planning. that if a leader is meant to push a group forward and help them grow, then jaehyun steps up to the plate in that art cannot be made without emotion and so to become better artists, to continue being artists, it’s so important to find the safe spaces of being able to express and feel everything as they should be felt.

this is why I think jaehyun has some of the strongest lyricism currently in the group. it’s why I think he was a powerful force coming into KOZ and bonedo, and sort of the missing piece. he feels so much and he allows himself to feel all of it. in turn, as the leader, it’s something he encourages in the members. it’s leading by example. jaehyun builds a safe space for them to express, by being open himself.

but beyond that, jaehyun being unapologetically himself becomes an unstoppable sort of barrier between the group and outside the group. while not as apparent now, I do think it’ll grow into him being a strong adovcate for each of the members and the group as a whole. the group matters to him. his members matter to him. jaehyun’s never going to act as if they don’t, so long as they do. as such, he’ll put them first. he’ll encourage them and their best interest. he provides space and works to create and maintain that space for them to express themselves and be themselves. it’s what makes jaehyun the best leader for bonedo now, and it’s what will allow him to continue to do so.

#boynextdoor #myung jaehyun #not door agenda #from behind the door #about the neighbors #worm leader #disclaimer is that i’m sick and writing this so idk if it’s actually very cohereant #the thoughts were clearer yesterday #but anyways #the point is that in the very way jaehyun contrasts from the group #is the way he leads them the best #and that comes with everything jaehyun is #and how unwaveringly jaehyun is exactly the person he is #that encourages the members to do the same #that he reminds them feelings are there to be felt #bc i think particularly in kpop #leaders don’t necessarily need to be the ones wrangling the group together when they’re running all over the place #they’ve got managers for that LMAO #they’ve got eldest members for that #like yes it often is the leader but that doesn’t need to be the case #in bonedo it’s probably jaehyun who needs to be brought back to topic #but it’s like bonedo doesn’t need to be lead in terms of navigating idol image #they don’t need to be directed on what they can or can’t say or do #they seemingly have enough training to know #it’s moreso being guide towards the opposite… in a sort of… expressing themself way #it’s being able to tap into what makes them different and everything they feel and how they each feel that differently #that will allow them to establish their artistic identity #and i think jaehyun’s a very strong component for them being able to do so

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eclipse-rain · 10 months

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Jjk - Big Brother Yuji + Choso Headcanons;

☆☆☆

Warning: Mentions of attempted suicide in first part + manga spoilers obvi

Masterlist~

☆☆☆

|Backstory|

•You and yuji are twins (sry i love them being twins soo much)

•you grew up together with him and your grandfather

•but the thing is, when dealing with jujutsu sorcerers being a twin is considered bad

•this ment you could see cursed spirits while yuji could not

•your grandfather tried to console you by saying they werent real and to try and ignore them for fear of people thinking you were crazy and trying to put you in a hospital

•you tried your best to think that way and you learned not to freak out in front of other people about what you were seeing

•but you were a kid and they looked scary, why were you the only one seeing these monsters?

•yuji was the main reason you were able to look past it, past them

•he was always in front of you so all you had to do was look towards him and then everything was alright

•his smile was always such a reassuring sight, it could put you at ease almost instantly, wash all your troubles away in the blink of an eye

•you really loved your older twin brother, and he loved you just as much

•it would have been good if things had stayed that way, but i guess then we wouldnt have this story

•there was a time where you couldnt take it anymore, the constantly being scared and looking over your shoulder, it was during a short period of time when yuji wasnt around

•you were nine years old by this point and in the bath, suddenly the bubbly water looked more reassuring than staying in a world full of monsters being the only one who could see them

•you let yourself sink into the warmth and the next thing you knew, yuji was above you, holding you in a fresh fluffy towel but instead of smiling like he always did, he was crying

•for the next year yuji and your grandfather had you sing everytime you bathed or showered for fear of it happening again

•but you had realised from that day on that if you had yuji in your life, wheather he was far away or right next to you, as long as he was alive you could push past what you saw and focus on him, you could stay alive too

•you were born together so you both had an unspoken promise that you would live together and when the time came, die together

•thats not the only thing that went wrong though

《Yeah im about to change the whole plot and spice it up real good, cue the trauma✨》

•when you were ten kenjaku came to retrieve one of you, either yuji or you, it didnt matter which

•your grandfather knew this would happen some time in the future as kenjaku made it known after you both were born

•but your grandfather kept it from both of you and raised you the same way, without difference, same clothes, same hair, same treatment so that he could try and feel less attachment when the time came to give one of you away

•what he would get in return would be the guaranteed safety of the other twin, not a hair on their head would be touched and they would have a normal life as a human unless they themself chose otherwise

•your grandfather had been stuck between a rock and a hardplace

•and thats how you got separated from your twin and your grandfather

•your grandfather didnt even know which one of you kenjaku took, he raised you both without any difference, including gender

•that didnt mean it didnt impact him any less though, he turned away from yuji, became more distant and contemplative of his life and yujis future

•he regretted and agonised over what happened every single day he lived until his death and made sure to make yuji promise not to end up alone at his own death bed

•yuji always kept you in mind, he never forgot a single thing about you, your hair, your eyes, your smell, the feeling of your small hand in his as he led you to your next class in school

•you were the first loss he faced in his life, your grandfather didnt have the heart to tell yuji where you had actually gone, not that he knew

•And kenjaku with his connections or powers god knows what, made it seem, to your school, all the people in the community, as if you had died and with what happened last year that didnt come as much of a shock

•otherwise people would start to ask questions if you suddenly werent around, like you had dissapeared into thin air, even though by all accounts your grandfather knew...you had

•he wasnt even allowed to know where you were going or what you would be doing, if you would have a normal life or whatever the alternative to that was

•Or even worse you were actually dead and kenjaku hadnt just made people believe that so yuji and him could live a normal peaceful life

•but in reality and unbeknownst to your grandfather kenjaku had plans for you, those which were never revealed to you and that you couldnt figure out because you could never for the life of you read the person who was suposed to be your so called "mother"

•of course you didnt know that kenjaku was technically your birth mother, you only figured it out years later, five years later to be exact, when you were fifteen, a little while before yuji also found out

•kenjaku didnt know which one of you he had taken either at the time but it didnt matter to him, it was all the same regardless

• he hadnt even planned on either of your births, with all the rest of the cursed wombs being failures he didnt have much hope left for either of you to work out in his master plan, just like the nine death painting brothers you both were far too normal (though his and your versions of normal didnt seem to align)

•but now you just seemed to give him more options, more paths he could take, more fun, a variable in his master plan if you will

•wheather you both would be a catalysts or not was up to you two but you yourself had made it your lifes mission so that your brother could continue living safely without the need of ever knowing that you werent crazy after all and what you saw was real

•let him be ignorant, let you carry all this burden by yourself, if he can be the light, your light and give you hope then you can be the darkness, carry his burdens, his share of darkness aswell as yours

•it would have probably stayed that way if he hadnt gotten himself entangmed with the king of curses after - of all the ones he could have eaten

~~~

|Choso|

•being one of kenjakus kids means your the only girl amongst all your siblings which definitely sucked a bit in your eyes

•like what do you mean you have ten siblings and not even a single one is a girl

•you'd have to put up with yuki as your big sister since that was the closest to the real thing you would get

•you werent there when yuji and nobara killed Eso and Kechizu and you didnt even know that they were your brothers yet anyway

•you first met choso when (of all times) kenjaku, mahito and he were playing a board game while waiting for the outcome of the fight between yuji, nobara, megumi, Eso and Kechizu

•well you didnt talk or even make eye contact but you both knew each other was there (you're probably in a badass looking cloke or something idk babe)

•kenjaku tried to coax you into playing with them, fed up you just ended up 'standing guard' so you could get some peace and quiet or so you thought because they (*ahem* mahito *ahem*) wouldnt stfu

•You were colder now that you were older and not showered in your big brothers light which he directed completely at you when you were younger

•you didnt say a word the whole time, you rarely did since you had been with kenjaku and his lackies

•you wondered everyday, since you had learned what cursed spirits were, why he still kept you alive and with him, you couldnt read him at all and it gave you a horrible pit in your stomach

•of course how were you to even guess what really was your realtion to him, even if cursed spirits and jujutsu sorcerers were real kenjaku technically being your mother still seemed a bit far fetch when you first learned about it

•as you listened to their conversation you noted that a person called itadori yuji was one of the jujutsu sorcerers fighting against chosos younger brothers along with a girl named kugisaki nobara

•you had come here now for this exact reason, (after learning yuji was now a jujutsu sorcerer) just in case something happened you would protect your brother, even if you didnt see him in person, even if you did and he didnt remember you, or recognise you

•after they split off to see who could find him first so did you, you had to find him before they did

•you didnt ... (well done)

•choso and yuji still fought and he almost killed yuji successfully but for some reason when you found choso he was alone, no yuji in sight and he was huddled in a ball on the ground looking like he was having a mental breakdown (whatever that was about)

•though when you questioned him about if he found yuji yet or not he suddenly got wierdly defensive, you decided you werent gonna try and reason with a cursed spirit who was obviously crazed since he was working with kenjaku (even if he was doing it for family which was the exact same reason as you had for doing the same thing)

•kenjaku ; the man who basically kidnapped you from your home five years ago for god knows what reason, telling you that you were special since you could see cursed spirits

•the man who made you feel special and useful and like you had a purpose in life, the man that put you on a pedestal above all those who couldnt see cursed spirits like you could

•his manipulative methods could have worked on your young mind, they had somewhat, but never fully because of one key thing

•this was because you always remembered yuji, your kind older brother who couldnt see cursed spirits, unlike you, but just the same as the people (humans) who would call you wierd or crazy for being able to

•but he wasnt one of those people, by all accounts in your mind and heart, to this day you still believe he is the kindest person in the whole world and it was because of this that you never saw yourself above non-sorcorers because your precious big brother was one of those people

•And it should have stayed that way

•but it didnt

•and you cant help but blame yourself everyday for it (even tho its literally not ur fault babes chill out a bit)

•for not being more prepaired, for not being more aware, for not keeping better tabs on your brother for fear kenjaku might break his promise to your grandfather now that he was dead

•you had asked kenjaku to tell you about what yuji was up to after you left when you were small

•as you got older you didnt want kenjaku being near yuji and his information on him could be unreliable, just lies he fed to you

•so you stopped asking to know about yuji and for a while stayed away completely before you started keeping your own tabs on him when you were older and more able, stronger

•you had learned alot in your time with kenjaku and his lackies, even if it was unwillingly and even if it was perhaps ruining you, or who you used to be

•the small, kind and scared girl was no more, instead a shell of that girl remained, who would only come out of hiding when she was face to face with her brother again finally

•instead now you were cold and unspeaking, as you were unwavering in the face of the same monsters you once ran from

•you had only found out that your grandfather had even died after you finally dug into what yujis life was like after you got older

•you also learned yuji had eaten a curse and enrolled in Jujutsu high school, now under so called "protection" by some of the most fearsome jujutsu sorcorers who ever lived

•*back to the present ig* both you and choso went looking for yuji again, since you had no luck finding him by yourself last time you chose to stick with choso this time as he found him first last time

•Choso however was less than pleased at having you stick to him, as he now for some reason seemed even more determined to find Yuji if that was even possible

•choso can sense the transformations of his younger brothers through their blood connections no matter how far away they are

•choso could see yuji in his fake memory because yuji was going through the final transformation, which is death

•choso during his mental breakdown had figured out yuji was his youngest brother, but he also found out something else

•see yuji was a twin and that ment he shared his soul with his other half, his own twin, you

•that ment if he died a piece of the other twin would die along with him

•this ment he could also see yujis twin there too, you

•though since he wasnt dealing with your soul (death/transformation) directly, but just a link between you and yujis as twins, you were very blurry and he couldnt properly make out your face in his paniced state of mind

•so he didnt recognise you as the person who kenjaku brought along (you could have had ur face covered by like a hood or mask when with kenjaku as well)

•he could see the other cursed wombs properly only because they were all already dead

•choso and you end up getting confronted by a curse and with him now being even more hell bent on finding yuji he leaves you to deal with it (he ran without saying a word to you, leaving you by yourself, he did not care lmao, he's off to protect his new baby bro)(tbf he didnt no you were his sister yet and feels bad about it in the future)

•so you two got separated

(Skipping to when he finds out cuz im lazy)

•choso when he finds out he also has a younger sister, which is you, would be very shocked at first, and a little unbelieveing of it, since all the other cursed wombs had been male

•honestly he didnt think it was even possible for them to be female at this point (not that it was a big deal) 1/11 those are wierd odds tho

•there had to be a reason for this, perhaps thats why kenjaku/noritoshi kamo was so interested in you (so maybe it was a big deal?? He wasnt so sure but he hoped that wasnt the case, kenjaku had seemed pretty interested in yuji also and he wasnt female)

•he didnt know if he should treat you any differently than he did for his brothers for a while when he first found out

•he was the same amount of pushy about wanting you to call him big brother as he was with yuji though, possibly even more so

•he has a little sister now, thats crazy, he wants to hear what being called big brother is like coming from you

•when you finally called him big brother the first time he started bawling like a baby

•after the shibuya incident the three of you are all living normal human lives together after everything was over

•yuji cooking in the kitchen like he had done so many times for you before in your childhood, choso and you both sat at oposite ends of the kitchen table

•A warm light from the window shone across it, signaling the first signs of it setting and nights approach, it would feel warm and cozy, the atmosphere light hearted and safe

•choso would be taking in the sight of it all, slightly melancholic, thinking of how your other brothers never got to experience this

•you would be reading a book, possibly even studying now that your back at school, a hot cup of steaming tea a little to your right, a basket of fruits in the center, a cat lay on your lap barely visible, only so by an ear twitch or the slight swish of a fluffy tail

•butterflys landed on the plants by the back door, the one that lead to the back gardens, where cherry blossom flowers bloomed on the trees in spring but in autumn they were bare and the air was cold and crisp

•farther down a trail of cherry blossom trees, the chickens roamed and slept inside their coops snuggled up to one another for warmth, you would go down to collect the eggs tomorrow morning as you had done this morning, those ones now being used by yuji prepairing omurice for your evening meal

•yuji and you were happy once again and choso could safely say he was the most happy now than he had ever been since he had been born, he just wished his brothers could have felt this way too

•the three of you had buried the remaining cursed wombs and mementos of Eso and Kechizu in the back garden next to your grandfathers grave

•you three visited them everyday and told them about everything that happened, from exciting things to those that were rather boring or simple

•it was a nice way to live

☆☆☆

Im backkk bitchesss📣, dont get ur hopes up tho, im here for a good time not a long time sry

I love writing nonsense about my silly little scenarios✊

Idk how i haven't written for jjk yet because its literally one of my favorite anime/mangas rn (I've also been waiting for choso to get animated and get more attention since i first saw his fine ass in the manga)

If there are plot holes pretend your ✨blind✨👩‍🦯

#jjk #jjk x reader #yuji itadori #choso kamo #jjk choso #yuji x sister!reader #choso x sister!reader #platonic #platonic x reader #platonic you weirdos

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lookforthelightsposts · 7 months

Text

|Hello, you.|

summery: you have been working at your parents bakery since your were 14, one day at the store, you meet Abby anderson.

warnings: abby has sexual thoughts about you,SPOILERS FOR THE SHOW (YOU) (watch it before you read), perv!abby, everything is in lowercase, masterbating (a&r), you get fuckrf by man lol.

🌱’s notes (🌱 is me): tell me if i missed anything also i suck at spelling and have bad grammar, my phone will probably correct smth into smth completely different then what i ment, also this is my first fic. DONT RUSH ME PLEASE!! (i did add/ change stuff from the show so i know that the ending didn’t happen but stfu)

——————————————————————————

YOUR POV

the sun shines in the room, lighting your face, the sound of footsteps, talking and carts being pushed around you. the new girl, who joined yesterday has been behind you the whole time, you obviously noticed but decided not to say anything. as she got closer and closer to you, you decided to say something. then you lift your head and look at her, holding the peach up, glancing at it then back up at the masculine girl. “do you think this peach looks like a butt?” you ask, making her go silent then she looks at the peach. “there is no wrong answer.” you add, easing your eyebrow with a tiny smile. and she looks back down and back up at you. “it looks at little, like a butt, yeah?” she says, “right?” you reply and hum, turning back around with a “thank you”.

“are you flirting..?, i’d like to think you are, but it’s just—— i can’t.”

the blonde thinks then she looks back up and she walks forward a little. “i should also inform you that..” she starts, walking closer then she’s right next to you and she points to the peaches. “all peaches look like butts.” she says and you take a deep breath, looking around. “oh yes. well, thank you for your honesty…” you start with a small fake sympathetic sigh, “i might go out on a limb and suggest that… bell peppers can be extremely vaginal depending on how you cut them.” you say, pressing your lips together. “i hadn’t noticed that, but i definitely will now. thank you.” the tall woman says. “yeah, no problem.” you say and you lift up off your heels then go back down with a smile. “were you following me?” you throw out, the blonde making a confused expression. “well.. i mean..” she starts, “not initially, but then yes.” she ends, holding the hand up that is holding her lettuce. “i was, completely. i am sorry… if i seem skeevy.” she admits and her dark blonde eyebrows lift up. “no.. i mean, you might’ve…” you start and look the tall blonde up and down, “if you looked like a skeeve, which.. i guess is me saying, good choice… showering today.” you say, nodding your head and your eyebrows lift also. “good. i debated so..” the blonde jokes, a grin forming on her face, her brow raising then going back down, her dark blue eyes meet your again. you let out a hum, “oh! you work here?” you ask, completely knowing that she does but you wanna keep the conversation going, the girls brow raises and she stares at you. “the apron” you say, pointing the the apron that’s hanging out of her backpack. “oh yeah,” she says, looking down at the strand hanging from her bag and she puts her hand that’s holding a green pepper and she puts over to the cafe. “abby. i just started at the cafe.” abby’s dark eyes dart to your again. “me too, um, i uh—— i manage the kitchen. i do most of the buying for the store,” you say, looking over across the room then you lift your left arm that has your basket and then put it back down. “i was just shopping for my dinner. anyway, sorry. y/n.” you say and chuckle, holding your hand out to shake the blondes. “cool, it’s nice to meet you y/n” abby smiles and shakes your hand. “i’ll see you in the break room then, abby.” you say and shrug with a chuckle walking off.

ABBYS POV.

“no, not biting.” abby mutters as she stands there, staring at where you were, “i’m not that person anymore, and i don’t think i ever will be again.” she mutters again along with a “i can’t be, y/n you are not for me.” abby says, walking off.

it’s been a day since the store talk and everything has been fine, you haven’t said a word to her which she wants but also doesn’t.

abby walks over to the shelf, picking up the first book of a stack she has in her hand and she slides it next to many others, her muscles flexing as she does since who ever put the last book in, didn’t fit it right. abby takes one by one and she puts them in order, fixing that one fucking book that wasn’t placed right. “the best it’s gonna be.” abby says under her breath.

“no offense, you look like your ready to puke.” Candace says, abby looking down at the table then up at candace. “just tell me what your want.” abby says, her boot tapping on the ground underneath the table. “i’m getting to it.” candace says, her lips sticky from her awfully bright but somehow dark lipstick. “here you go,” the server says, setting down candace’s drink and abby looks over at the sever setting down candace’s drink then she looks at candace and she raises her eyes browns, her lips pressed together, candace’s eyes darting back to the blonde which who has the palest face she’s ever seen. “now you really look like you’re gonna puke.” candace says dipping a fry into her milkshake then eating it. “sorry excuse me.” abby sayss and she quickly gets up, rushing into the restroom.

“excuse me.” a man’s voice interrupts her thoughts then abby looks up and she walks over to the man. “yeah, how can i help?” abby asks, the clipboard and pencil in her hand. “how can you help? yeah um..” the man starts, taking his sun glasses off, “can you tell me if this Carl Jung book is vegan?” he asks, tilting his head slightly, catching abby off guard and she looks at her clipboard. “uh, if the—— if the book is——?-“ “new here, huh?” the man says, grinning slightly. “yeah, your apron is, like, very fresh.” he says, looking down at the apron tied around abby’s waist. “you got me. i just started this week.” abby says, pointing her pencil to the clipboard, “the books are made from trees. i’m pretty sure those are vegan,” abby says and she looks at the man. “i’m just messing with you old sport.” the brown haired man chuckles, poking at abby’s shoulder. “forty.” calvin’s voice says. “calvin.” forty replies. “you tell our new friend abby here that it was vegan author month at the cafe?” forty asks, turning his head to calvin. “i will get abby on the right page” calvin answers, pointing to abby then putting his hand in his pocket. “abby.. i think you are gonna do really well here. i like your whole look. it’s very um… i’ve-read-a-book.” forty says and his eyebrows raise, abby gives him a small smile and when he turns back to calvin she wipes it right off. “calvin…” forty starts, calvin clearing his throat then forty gives his drink to calvin and walks away. “so that’s..” abby’s starts, “forty’s parents own the place, obviously. shit he was being cool just now, but if he comes back and it’s still wrong…” calvin says quickly then abby looks up from the clipboard. “i got it. don’t worry, calvin.” abby says then looks back down at her clipboard. “watch the register.” calvin says, walking off quickly and abby takes a deep breath then she walks over to the register and she sees you. “let me guess, hurricane forty?” you joke, setting down a plate of croissants on the counter and you smile. “yeah. yeah, i guess so.” abby replies. “don’t worry. he almost never actually fires anyone. you know how some people are, like. starting in their own movie? well, his.. is about a hilarious misunderstood genius working with idiots.” you say as you put the croissants on a same plate filled with others for people to take after they buy something. “right, one of those.” abby replies, smiling with a nod and you chuckle. “what? do- do i have something?” abby says quickly, looking at you when she notices your expression. “oh no, i was just trying to figure out what your movie is.” you say, looking up at abby and she looks down “oh i think it might be the one where the gets the guy in trouble at work for slacking off. i’m sorry, i got to go. thank you, though.” abby says, walking away into the locker room.

abby walks into the room, biting into the croissant and sitting on a pile of wood. “are you running away from me?” your voice crosses over her mind and she glances up at ‘you’, your standing in front of her. “what? no.” abby starts, sitting up slightly. “i feel like you are.” you say and walk closer to her. your right in front of her now and you run your hands down her masculine arms then move your hands to her belt then kiss her, leaning her back and your lips latch onto her neck at your hand moves into her boxers and you shove two fingers into her sopping hole and she leans her head back slightly with a small groan. then abby’s snaps back into reality, her skilled fingers moving quickly in and out of her hole and she leans her head back, her lips parting and she pants slightly, her orgasm building but then she realizes where she is and what she’s doing so she quickly pulls her hand away and she moves her hands away from her body, she quickly stands up and she zips her pants up then fixes her belt.

the sky is now a orange, reddish as the wind blows faster and harsher, the day slowly turning into day. abby walks into her apartment, shutting her door then she sets her bag down and she walks into the living room, sitting down in front of the window, looking down at the scope and what are the odds..? it’s pointed right to your house.

you’re standing in the kitchen, cutting vegetables then she sees you grabbing your phone and something grabs your attention from the other side of the room, abby’s eye brows raise and she zooms in a little more and she sees a man walk inside the kitchen with his arm around you, she bites her lip then she pulls away from the scope for a second. “who the fuck is this y/n” abby grumbles, looking at you two through the scope again and she narrows her eyes, your back to cutting vegetables but the man his behind you, kissing your neck and her hand grips the scope but then she backs off, noticing herself again and she gets up, walking into her small kitchen and she looks down at the counter and makes herself some instant noodles since she hasn’t bought/ got the chance to get anything yet. abby sits down on her couch and she takes her phone out, going onto instagram and she types ‘y/n y/l/n’ which she finds instantly and it’s mostly about cooking but she sees nothing about the man and she scrolls for a little more then likes one of your old posts by accident and her eyes widen, she throws her phone down on the couch, knowing that you’ll see it.

abby eats her noodles then sets the cup down, glancing over at the scope then she gets up and she walks over to the scope and she zooms into your apartment again and her hand grips it to the point it might break, her muscles flexing.

your sitting on the couch, your head leaned back and the man is on top of you, she knows that she should look away but she doesn’t and her face turns red with anger and she sees the man get off of you and she calms down after that’s but she watches as he just leaves you. “fuck buddy, probably.” abby mutters then she grabs her phone again and she looks at your account and she goes to following and sees the man, andrew smith, he has multiple pictures of him with other women then she looks back at you through the scope and sees you sitting on the couch while running your hands through your hair, you clearly didn’t get even close to cumming and abby can tell, he just left you there also, bear and panting. suddenly she sees you laying back down and your legs spread again, her head turns then she quickly zooms in as far as the scope can go, seeing your thighs and you fucking yourself made her squeeze her legs together. abby then shoves her hand down her boxers once again and she starts abusing her cunt, her head falling back and then she tilts it back down to look at you and she starts saying your name over and over again like your actually there then she lets out a loud moan as she comes on her fingers, not even 2 seconds after she sees you leaning your head back and slowing down your movements. abby pulls her hand out of her boxers, not bothering to clean herself then she gets up and she cleans her hands, drying them after and she grabs her phone, seeing a picture in front of a house with andrew in the picture and she walks into her room, throwing a sweatshirt on and she walks outside, looking at the picture then she notices the exact place, it’s her wonderful neighbor, who has a wife.

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🌱: don’t really like this but i promise i will get better at writing and i’ll try to make it more like abby then joe😭.

#abby x fem!reader #abby anderson #abby the last of us #abby x y/n #abby tlou #lesbian #lgbtq #tlou2 #joe goldberg #dom!abby

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pervcoded · 5 months

Text

cunt. starring baji, chifuyu

content warning: Aye this shit is evil. FTM misgendering- reader ‘passes’ but Baji is very diminutive of/disrespectful of his identity in this. Chifuyu is his accomplice. They are not good in this lol. Rape rationalizations, Dacryphilia (Chifuyu). Sadism (Baji). Hard non/con, reader uses he/him pronouns but Baji will refer to him as a female. degradation/humilation. Implied bajitora. Lots of cursing (fucks and shit, mostly). Wishing for death (brief ment).

Reader is referred to as: Man, Slut, Whore, Girl. Bitch. Boy.

Readers genitals referred to as: cunt/pussy, boypussy (1), clit/clitty. (small adjective) penis. Dick. Cock.

“What a fucking cunt.” Yeah. You could say the same thing.

He pinches your clit cause you got too much attitude on your face. Brows too furrowed, lip too thick. Makes you look like a man. “I am a grown fucking man!” Yeah, you say that, but this pussy ‘tween your legs got Baji thinking a little different.

It’s juicy and fat. Clit a mimicry of the soft thing dangling between his legs. It looks cute in the light when your legs are open long enough.

Flicks your little clitty and you squirm and writhe and he has to hold you down by your neck cause you won’t stop fighting him. That’s okay, though. He hasn’t gotten any in a while, can’t promise he won’t cum quick.

“You wanna run around with gangs with this shit between your legs? Look! Pussy so fat it fucking dangles, y’all.” He announces to the crowd of one, your scowl deepening even as the heat seeks to melt your facade. He grips your calf and lifts your leg too wide, your thigh tensing and jerking painfully.

“Pussy like that… just begging to get fucked.” You mourn the loss of your dignity, your hands leaving the iron cable at your throat and darting to your shirt, fingers plucking at the dangling end to drag it over your delicates. Baji doesn’t have enough hands to stop you, but he doesn’t seem to care, looking towards his blonde friend.

“Ever seen boypussy, ‘Fuyu?” Chifuyu still hasn’t entirely grasped what’s happening.

You’re from somewhere else. Different gang, probably. But you’re dressed down right now, sweatpants and hanes shirt and jacket, windbreaker. Baji mentioned a favor he had to cash in on. There was an apartment, polite old lady in the lobby, slow elevator. Hallways with The Shining carpet, this potent bad feeling,

Now you, bent in half on your own bed. Granted Baji’s doing most of the work, but it makes Chifuyu uncomfortable watching you contort that way. You’re all lines and edge and box and square. You got a little plush though; nice thighs, cute ass, tummy …

He’s gotten ahead of himself.

“Ah—No, Baji-san.” He comes closer at the curl of Baji’s finger. “Well get the fuck over here, then. Hold hi— ” Baji’s lip raises like he’s all boxer and bully, like he’s got another fucking stupid idea,

“Come hold her still, dumbass.” You buck at the accusation, suddenly so lively you actually clip his hip. Dumb bitch. His hand leaves from ‘round your neck and you take a deep breath, palms darting to cradle a crushed larynx.

He jams a finger up your pussy and you scream.

Maybe this shit is The Shining and you’re Missus Duval, because Johnny is here.

Fuyu is trying to kick off his shoes. How polite of him, you don’t think, as he clambers on the bed - grabbing your hands and forcing them back into fluff and blankets. Looks nervous; but not as much as you are. You’re trembling, trying so fucking hard not to cry, and it makes Baji hard like fuck all else. He doesn’t afford himself a moment to contemplate the nuances of who you are—or to him, what. Finger’s going in and out, but it’s not like you make it easy. It’s like fingering a crack in concrete.

Any hole’s a goal, and hole-y fortune smiles upon him now, he thinks. He’s hit the fucking jackpot.

And you’re not ugly or anything. Just too boy. If you were in Toman he thinks he’d put in a special uniform request with Mitsuya. Any whore shouldn’t wear a skirt past ‘er thigh - easy access is important.

But you’d probably look like you’re playing dress-up. He’s got a slimmer wasteline than you, and he’s a man.

You’d make a really ugly girl. Need a bag over to head to fuck you— maybe shave off the happy trail, get your skin all nice, smooth. “Um, Baji?” Baji starts going for his belt. “Yeah? Fuck you want? Wanna use ‘er mouth? Go on, I don’t give a fuck,” Chifuyu blushes piggy-pink, then says, “Nah, It’s not that boss… Ah, you sure ‘Tora won’t get mad at you?” Baji sucks his teeth at the mention of that cock hungry twink. “Who givesa fuck? If rabbit wants the carrot, he shouldn’t be surprised he gotta share it.” Kinda likes when that slut gets a little loose anyway, Baji can throw his weight around, bust his lip and Tora’ll love it. Probably ask him to do it again. Lick the blood off his knuckles and then give him head, get him used to the smell of your cunt on his balls.

Baji’s tugging on his belt like some dickless virgin, can’t slide the leather out of place fast enough—

You’re still kicking, even if he’s got your leg tucked under his arm. Still think you got a chance, but you’re wasting all your damn breath on struggling, you don’t notice he’s got his cock out until he’s raising your hips to his height.

“F-fuck off!” The dog makes a face, showing you his top teeth all like “F-Fuck off!”, mocking you and shit. You’re not sorry you got caught selling on his block, but he’s making you a lot sorry he didn’t bash your brains in when he found you. You’d prefer the bloody nose, broken ribs, black eyes, punctured lung.

Anything but this, man, fuck—

“Dude.” “Dude.” “Listen to me! Fuck—stop! I’m, I’m sorry alright? Just d..don’t— ” Whine whine whine whine whine. Yap yap yap. Blubber lips; so scared shitless you can’t even keep your drool in your maw. He spits into your babbling mouth, and you choke on it. Baji gets a good grip on your cheek and shoves your face down into the bed, lines himself up. “Shut up bitch. Just take it.”

Pushes the tip in just a little. Just get a feel for it. “Oh fuuuuuuuuuuuck. Oh fuck yes. Damn bitch, you’re ti-ight, ah,” he moans, nails in your hips to keep you still. You buck like a filly with no home training, and he’s fixing to break you in, bareback.

It doesn’t feel good dry. He’s too big, the fucking bulldog, and you’re not high enough or drunk enough or fucked up enough to get your pussy wet. Or maybe your pipes are broken. That shit you take to make your jaw cut like that, flatten out your hips— that’d do the trick. Might not be an all bad thing though, he could probably cum in you as much as he wants.

“Sure you don’t want her mouth—fuck—‘Fuyu?” He pushes in a few more inches with a little wiggle of his hips. It burns. “Tight, whore’s tight.” Swallows, “I’m gonna break you in half if you don’t loosen up, bitch, c’mon,” Your back arches and your hands thrash in Chifuyu’s grip and you’re barking and fighting, and Chifuyu’s got this look on his face. Like he doesn’t know if he wants Yakisoba or Top Ramen. Baji doesn’t know what the fuck there is to think about. He’s muttering shit to himself, spine firepole straight and cheeks blushed beetroot red. “I don’t know Baji, I don’t think I can just… y’know?” You interrupt with a groan. He looks down at your heated face, tears skimming your cheeks. He doesn’t like how it turns him on.

Chifuyu shrinks away from that feeling physically, grip loosening a little on your wrists, and you take the opportunity to pull. Fuyu near hops out of his skin to keep you in place as your struggle revives itself.

“Nooo no no, fuuuck that! I’ll bite your dick off, I’ll fucking—ugh!” The dark hared demon maintains the pressure on your hips. “What you’re gonna do, is back up on my dick. Quick and easy, slut. C’mon.”

Baji wants you down to his balls. He’s only half-in and you hate it. Loathe it. Despise it. He’s humping with puppy precision and has wandering hands, grabs up on your ass, tits—lack thereof, only settling at the back of your knees to tug you forward. He brings his head up to meet his friend’s ambivalence, talking as if you’re not even there. “Fine. Fuck the slut or don’t ‘Fuyu, don’t matter to me. Better I get some than you, anyway.”

God you hate this guy's fucking guts. He better paralyze you after this shit, cause as long as you’re breathing, he’s destined to become dust, you will crush him and kill him and fuck him,

Fuck him,

ah. Your chest feels tight. All the scared that was chased off by your fight and flight surges back into you all at once, potent and suffocating. “S..stop! Please, just stop..” You sob, and Baji levels an unimpressed expression at you. “What happened to all that fight you cunt?” He taunts, jostling you. “You giving up on me now?” You respond with tears. Baji seems unmoved. Chifuyu’s heart aches bittersweetly, and his hard cock throbs in anticipation, watching the water delicately arc down the sides of your face, over your cheeks.

Chifuyu doesn’t hold you any more cause you just wanna hold yourself now. Hold yourself and cry, cry, cry. It’s freaking him out a little, watching a man be pushed to such distress, though of course he’s having more… conflicted feelings about it. If you get any louder, someone might catch you. With your pants down. Bent over. Cock five inches dick in your pussy. Imagine if your whole building knew you had one. You don’t know what they’d think - couldn’t fathom it, probably, and who knows; they might want a piece too!

Look at how much you hate this right now. You couldn’t handle the embarrassment. He won’t do that to you - won’t let that happen. You’ve already done enough, now it’s his turn. His hands move to the front of his jeans. “Ah, Baji… slow down.” The sound of pants unbuckling follows, denim sliding down thighs. A slow, incredulous laugh. “That’s what I’m talking about! Hold on Chifuyu… C’mon bitch. Move.”

Baji’s gets you into a better position, buddy ‘Fuyu lifting your chin and looking at the lost life from your face. Expression dazed? Stony even? Irrelevant, ‘cuz it scrunches up funny when he puts his tip in your mouth.

You groan in what sounds like pain as he slides into your throat, but it’s gotten much harder to hear you now. You’ve gone gentle, twitching and hiccuping and crying, but no kicking, no punching. Baji’s a little sad to see the grit go.

You’re still so tight - and it’s starting to hurt instead of feel good. He grits his teeth, reaches his thumb swipes daftly at your little soldier. God, he’s never seen anything like it. Your hood is huge! Your little clit really does look like pinky-sized penis. Kinda glorious, in a way- it wobbles and twitches when he pokes it and it makes you writhe- if you weren’t an in incompetent slut you might’ve been able to get some place with that kind of ambition. He strokes you slow, and Chifuyu starts pumping in and out of your mouth.

Drags his dick along your tongue and it feels like sandpaper. Your jaw opens up a little more for him, and inch by inch you take it, til his balls are resting against your nose bridge all nice like.

“Oh look at that, girlie’s getting wet…” Baji rubs your slick over his finger, pinkish pomade stretching a slim film over the tip of it. “Maybe that dick is doing something for her, Chifuyu. C’mon, don’t be afraid to fuck the slut now,” Baji slurs, getting comfortable with Chifuyu’s rhythm.

In and out. In, and out.

It’s agony. They seesaw with the coordination of blind mice, Chifuyu resting his cock in the snugness of your throat, not as eager to move as Baji - who’s doubled his ministrations on your dick, trying to get you to open up more for him. Antagonism and hatred bubbles to the surface mostly, but your cock has started feeling a little more sensitive since Dickhead’s learned to stroke it properly. Stuck his fingers in his mouth for lube and is using his whole wrist to work you, two fingers diligently stroking either side of your dick. You groan and Chifuyu feels it, full body tremble as he grabs for your chin, determined to stay in your throat. “Keep- keep doing that, feels nice… ah,” The last thing you give a shit is making sure he’s having a good time, but it’s not like you can help it.

“Yeah… That’s it. Open up for me, bitch. Gonna fuck your cervix - make you suck my dick clean after you make me cum. You’d love that, wouldn’t you, bitch?”

You hope you choke on it.

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀TOKREV/BANNER ART by @/KenWakui

all content written by me @ciematis, is owned by me, and you are not allowed to repost or translate my works. don't put my shit into ai generators, don't steal my shit and put it on wattpad. thank you.

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sugar-omi · 1 year

Note

I need to know… for science… if when merman!Cove turns human, does he end up naked like Ariel in the Little mermaid?

ANON.... THE GASP I JUST GASPED pls i immediately started imagining it and i had to stifle a laugh 🙈🤭<3 anyway this spiraled but i hope this answers your question 🫶🫶 somehow i think i contributed more to your research than you asked for but were thinking (projecting much naeomi? LMAO /lh)

i got another ask before this one for (innocent) mer!cove hc's, it can be found here: ["merman cove headcanons"] related: ["D&D headcanons for OL1+2"]

tags : Suggestive + crack, drabble

+ NSFW under the cut, monster dick? jfc i never thought i'd type that out....., monster fucking (implied/ment)

synopsis : merman cove when he turns into a human. and a bit on what's under his clothes/scales.

well... i would like to tell you no but yeah yeah he is

cove keeps a "sash" around him, so when he wants to shift, he just ties it around his waist until he puts some pants on

(i imagine he has some fins around his hips perhaps? so he keeps it across his chest. at least keeps it there so it doesn't interrupt his swimming)

omg, imagine you plan to meet one day, and cove thinks he has enough time to run into the beach house and put on some pants before you arrive

so he shifts and starts going to the beach house but then, in the corner of his eye he sees a figure clad in your favorite color and-

it's you. wide-eyed, open-mouthed, and you're so obviously flustered

cove is frozen (a mistake)

and when you glance down, blinking owlishly, does cove yelp and dives back into the ocean....

well... needless to say i think you might need to reschedule n cove will see you in like 7 to 8 business days 😬😬

ofc it's before you're dating so cove is freaking the fuck out

for a bit after that, you meet at whatever location you've decided on until cove can stomach seeing you at the beach again <3 poor baby

i had no intention of talking abt his dick but... I must. and someone will ask anyway right? (im projecting n justifying myself LMAO)

+ in his mer form:

of course we got the typical slit in the tail whatever blah blah if you've read mermaid smut before you alrdy know

(im realizing how many.... interesting. fics i've read... no one say ANYTHING<//3)

his dick is so pretty like this but also so intimidating

because cove is so much bigger in merman form than he is in human form, although he's still impressive then.

anyway, cove's dick has the same gradient as his ears

the base is a deep blue-purple color, the tip of his dick is the same flesh tone of his tan but it has more of a purple undertone <3

now the shape

oh lord...

it's fat.

but to start light... his dick has a nice curve, and don't worry! its not a fight to put in kind of fat, but he has a knot of sorts though...

i wouldn't say it grows n you're stuck together like in a/b/o fics, but it is a small feat to pull out (this is the moment I realized imma end up writing a mer!cove smut fic 💀)

i was going to say he has a piercing down there, but i take that back. he does have ridges though on the underside of his dick

they smooth out the closer you get to the tip, and honestly, they are most prominent around the base

+ in his human form

it's normal!

well... if you ignore the way he's a bit thicker than the average man

(especially at the base, although it's not as prominent as his 'knot')

also that he still has the ridges on the underside of his dick...

other than that it's basically the same as a humans!

at least it's not as girthy as in his mer form

your finger tips can't even touch in his mer form, at least in his human form you're...

well you're closer than before <3

of course, he still has that sweet curve. and if anything, it's a bit more prominent since you aren't being stretched out n overpowered by this huge merman 🧜‍♂️

length is this the same 6-6.5 inches though <3

actually i take that back... I think in mer form, he's around 7 inches

if you're worried abt where all that dick is gonna go, dw a good couple inches is his 'knot' so just don't catch him during mating season and you're okay<3

speaking of mating season....

oh man i didn't even think abt it but he's feral

i think mermaids/sirens release a pheromone during sex, no matter what, but during mating season it's stronger

it's just to calm their partner and make them more relaxed. during mating season, though, it also becomes more like an aphrodisiac

and he's releasing more of these pheromones during this time, a more subconscious thing that otherwise he could control normally.

and ofc, unless you're not worried abt it bc you can't get preg, take some type of birth control potion, or want it. cove's one goal is to breed or mate you

if you're unmated, full expect cove to claim you during this time. now i'm not gonna say smth about biting your scent gland or some shit, but i do think it's like some kind of ritual shit

i imagine its something like cove adding a drop of your fluids (spit, blood, cum) into the special ritual juice and drinking it, then when you wake up next you find a matching "tattoo" on you and cove

or if you're basic (or a masochist) then yeah we'll go w the biting thing

besides that need to claim you, he wants you so bad

to fill you up, to fuck you dumb on his cock, and please you...

he just needs you. but he really does try to hold back, especially since if you're not a mer-person than you probably couldn't handle how rough mer-people can be during heat.

okay i...i think i'm done

excuse me while I reevaluate my existence after wtf i just wrote🫡

#olba #our life: beginnings & always #cove holden #cove holden x reader #cove x mc #cove x reader #cove our life #our life cove #cove holden smut #smut #cove holden x mc smut

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beeslibrarycorner · 7 months

Text

Escape

Felix catton x reader x Oliver quick

Warnings: none

It all started when the three of you were awoken by heavy rain and very loud thunder. It was 5:30 am.

That doesn’t stop Oliver or Felix from trying to at least get you to go back to sleep so that your sleep schedule wouldn’t be messed up for the next couple of nights. They were very adamant about it and you could see and hear the stubbornness from them.

Felix pulled you to lay your head on his chest while Oliver started to rub soothing circles into your back. Felix started humming so that the deep vibration of his voice would get you back to sleep.

Unfortunately it wasn’t working, you were wide awake and wanting to get out of bed. No it wasn’t a want it was a need, you were starting to get restless.

Felix naturally is stubborn and does not let you get out of bed. “I’m sorry darling me and Ollie just want a cuddle with our favorite girl”he said. Oliver hushes you when you make noise in protest. This goes on for awhile until you just accept your fate of being stuck between the two.

Your thirst for coffee is still there but you just have to wait until they fall back to sleep, it’s only a matter of time before it happens. Twenty minutes later Felix gently places you on the pillows and Oliver wraps his arms around you. He walks off to the bathroom, a few minutes later Oliver detaches from you and stretches yawning and turning away.

You jump out of bed quickly before Oliver could turn back over and grab you. You moved fast out of the room when you heard Felix leave the bathroom and gasp at what had happened.

“We’re going to get you darling” Felix called out and you couldn’t help but giggle. You heard socked feet moving after you and you felt your heart thump in your chest.

You ran through hallways and Corodoors without any real plan in mind. You didn’t know how far along the two of them were as you kept moving along.

Once you reached the kitchen, you grabbed the coffee grinds to make yourself a mug. A loud gasp startled you, which in turn made you drop the coffee grounds back on the counter. You saw Oliver on the other side of the kitchen island “sweet girl, it’s too early for you to have coffee” he said, he had a look in his eyes that ment trouble.

He tried to round the island to reach you and you bolted for the dining room. You heard Felix chuckle somewhere but you couldn’t care less, you needed your coffee.

They were toying with you and you did not like how small you felt, that was there goal though in the end. You had to get out of that area fast before you were caught by one of them and you would be stuck in bed for a couple more hours.

You ran through another threshold to get into another room. You bumped into Felix and before you could back away he hoisted you onto his shoulder. “I told you love, we were going to get you” Felix said, he sounded tired now. “Put me down” you said “I need to make my coffee” you continued moving your body slightly to make a point.

“Not a chance darling, you shouldn’t be drinking coffee this early in the morning” he said echoing what Oliver said before. “Anyways coffee causes you to become anxious and that’s not good for you lovey, Ollie can get you some juice if you want something to drink.” He said before patting your bottom and continuing to walk down the hallway. You felt Oliver grab your calf and give it a light squeeze.

Felix threw you on the bed and Oliver plopped down and dragged you under the covers, Felix doing the same. The two of them were tired from the events and when you looked at the clock you saw it was only 7 am you inwardly groaned.

“Don’t pout honey” Felix says there’s a teasing lilt to his voice. “I think I know how to get her to feel abit sleepier” Oliver said from over your shoulder.

“Oh yeah? What’s your idea?” Felix asks as he hitches your leg over his own. Suddenly you feel fingertips scritching along your sides and ribs, you try to curl in on yourself. Felix chuckles, “oh I like your idea Ollie” he says before he starts to join in.

Going for the skin under your arms, you can’t help but laugh harder from the attack. When they do finally stop you feel your muscles have become a bit more weighted and your head felt a bit fuzzy.

Oliver moved closer to you and Felix brushed the hair out of your face, both of them watching how tired you were. “Well done Ollie, she’s starting to doze”Felix says and a big hand comes down on your back and starts rubbing circles there.

You don’t care who’s it belongs to, you can’t even be mad at them for doing this.

“See it’s not that hard to be a good girl, isn’t it sweetheart?” Oliver murmurs into your hair and you make an unintelligible noise in response. You hear both of them chuckle and you feel them snuggle in closer.

You fall asleep a few minutes the two of the not far behind.

#felix catton x reader x oliver quick #felix catton x oliver quick #felix catton x reader #oliver quick x reader #saltburn imagine #saltburn

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sushiwriterhere · 1 year

Text

two: required texts

flight path

summary: "It takes your remaining sober thoughts to refocus on beer pong instead of how hard it hits you that you want Jake." rating: mature (eventually explicit, 18+ mdni) pairing: jake 'hangman' seresin x f!reader word count: ~6.9k lol warnings: angst, masturbation ment, enemies to lovers!, college au!, eventual smut, hangman being hangman, no use of y/n. notes: dedicated to @waklman bc u entertain my insane dms <3 pls pls pls let me know what you think everyone!! masterlist here this fic is being posted from my queue while I have little access to the internet. any tag list requests/fic replies will be slow; thanks!

"Jake said you were coming to our party this Friday?" Bradley's smile is so genuine, so unlike everything about Jake, "Never thought you'd agree but it'll be good to see you."

Sometimes you regret making things so sour with Jake, because Bradley’s actually really sweet. He’s been letting you and Jake duke it out about your project at their breakfast bar counter while he cooks in the background. He’s kind of always on FaceTime with someone, usually a girl, and he even makes a mean chocolate chip cookie. Something about the flakey sea salt just does it.

Bradley is the kind of guy you think you might settle down with one day. Bradley doesn’t throw his hands up in the air at you in frustration when you argue about what exactly qualifies as sustainability, and he certainly does not make deals with you to try and get you to come to frat parties.

That being said, he looks so happy to hear that you might be joining them that you really don’t have the heart to knock him down.

“Oh, yeah, Jake–” You consider your words carefully.

Jake hadn’t explicitly said that the deal was to be kept hush-hush, but you didn’t really know how much you wanted people knowing that you were willing to trade your introvert lifestyle just to ensure a good grade. Plus, it felt just a smidge pathetic that that was what you’d caved to.

“Jake told me he talked you into it in exchange for going with your lead on your project, but it doesn’t seem to really be working.” Bradley’s laugh fills the hallways of the lab and you feel yourself tense up.

God, you really did get the short end of the stick if it was that obvious that Jake wasn’t holding up his end of the bargain at all.

“Yeah... well...” You trail off, twisting your hands in front of you until someone calls you name at the end of the hallway.

Bradley looks at you, his gaze a little too knowing, before you both wave goodbye and you take off toward the sound of your supervisor’s voice.

Running into Bradley is one thing, he’s nice and doesn’t make you want to poke your eyeballs out, getting to the end of the hallway to see Jake standing in front of your professor with an easy-going smile on his face is another. Fantastic.

“Mr. Seresin here was just telling me that the two of you have been hard at work,” Jake bounces his shoulders just a little behind your professor’s back, as if rubbing it in how much he’d obviously been talking himself up in the few seconds before, “I have high expectations for the two of you.”

You resist the urge to call him a dumbass in front of the man who’s probably going to single handedly get you into MIT, and school your features into something a little more school-appropriate. You are not going to let him screw this, especially this, up for you.

“Of course, Professor Simmons, we’re certainly putting our all into it.” Jake mock gags behind the professor’s back for a split second before he turns around, and then he’s the picture of academic excellence.

Simmons wanders off in the way he usually does, leaving just you and Jake standing in the hallway. Distantly, you know that you’re technically on the clock, but you’re well-liked enough that you can get away with a little time theft. No one’s had any complaints on time sheet day so far.

Jake rocks back and forth on the balls of his feet, smile ever present. For a moment, he looks a bit unsure of himself, but the expression is gone even quicker than it came.

“What are you doing in the labs, Jake. Don’t you have some other poor girl to harass?” You cross your arms and stare expectantly at him– you’d rather spend your stolen time reading the New Yorker on your phone and not dealing with Jake Seresin.

“Was just dropping by to chat with Simmons, you know how it is. Office hours, etcetera, etcetera.” He’s at ease once again, his gaze trained fully on you.

“Why did you say etc like that?”

“Did you just say ‘e-t-c’?”

For a moment there’s complete and entire silence, the type that happens right before exams are handed out. Then, Jake starts howling with laughter, completely doubled over. You watch in horror, listening to his voice echo around the sterile hallways and probably right into every professor’s office.

Once he’s done completely humiliating you, he stands up and wipes at his eyes, “Sorry, you just—you were lecturing me the other day about ‘histrionics’ and you’ve never heard etcetera said aloud have you?”

You bristle, teeth gritted, “I’ll have you know, you can say it either way.” He doesn’t need to know, but you haven’t heard it aloud.

“Oh, I was also looking for you.” His abrupt change of subject makes you nervous.

You and Jake have admittedly been spending a lot of time together. After your first few hours at the library, Jake’s been making a habit of being around you. Like, a lot.

First, he’s always sitting next to you in your shared classes. You’re only taking four, and sharing three of those is just a lot of Jake-time. He mostly leaves you alone, thankfully, but he’s taken to poking you to get your attention for his random thoughts, turning his computer your direction to show you a funny meme someone sent him, and occasionally reaching over to doodle on your notes. He also always uses your shared seat rest.

You don’t know why you let him do it. But, if you were brutally honest, it’s kind of nice having him around. Despite all your petty disagreements, Jake’s a bright personality, and it makes your stomach flip in a funny way when he spots you across the quad and waves wildly to get your attention, or when he buys you lunch before your library sessions. You do keep bickering about nearly everything though.

That’s the second thing. Now, after your two classes together on Mondays and Wednesdays, the two of you will go to the library and study til the wee hours of the morning. On more than one occasion, he’s bought you coffee to sustain your hours of staring at complex equations and trying to apply to grad schools.

(“What grad school are you applying to now?”

“Nunya.”

“Okay, unless the top fifteen rankings have been updated since the last time I checked there is no grad school that—“

“Nunya business.”

“Very funny. Real mature. You’re really childish y’know that.”

“I’m childish? Remind me which one of us spent eighty five dollars at a candy store last week after taking forty five minutes to decide.”

“There’s a lot of options!”)

You two don’t make a lot of conversation but it’s getting easier to talk to him like he’s a normal person, like he’s anyone else. You still keep your cards close to your chest, though, unready to let him in fully and still not entirely trusting him.

Once, you’d shared a bit about how much pressure you felt to get into a top graduate program, to ensure that your parents were taken care of as an only child. Jake had been surprisingly empathetic, and had shared some about his home life, which you suspected wasn’t as idyllic as he made it seem, but it had made you smile.

“Youngest, with four sisters, I was a little doll,” He’d laughed. He never talked about his parents, really.

It had been an odd moment of peace between the two of you until he had teased you for the way you read out an equation as you were checking your work, and then it was back to trading barbs.

The third thing is that he hadn’t invited you to a party til this week, about four into the semester. Before he had, it hung over your head like an anvil–ominous, always present, and not exactly forthcoming on when it was planning on crushing you like a bug.

He’d been too nice about it, assuring you that whatever you wore would be fine (“Just think... slutty?” “Don’t be sexist, Jake.” “What! That’s what the sorority girls say.” “Well, are you a sorority girl?” “I can be if you want me to be, sweets.” “You have issues.”). He’d also said he’d keep an eye out on you but that his frat brothers were all great people, and besides, Bradley would be around. You don’t really want to share how it makes you feel that Bradley had asked you if you really were attending.

“Just wanted to make sure you’re coming on Friday.” His smile softens into something more genuine than his usual wild grin. “Was worried I might’ve scared you off.”

You huff, “I’m not scared.”

The way he looks at you in that moment makes you want to shove him so he’ll stop staring at you, a combination of pity and something else you’re afraid to identify, “No, not at all.”

Then, his demeanor changes back into something that’s a bit more familiar to you as he tucks his hands into his pockets and turns to leave, “Besides, if you don’t come, we’re doing our entiiiire project on Naval mechanics. Bye!”

He’s gone before you can yell at him.

This isn’t who you are–outfits strewn all over the floor of your room, music blaring from your phone where it’s charging in the corner, a layer of nervous sweat starting to coat your forehead and palms. Nothing fits right or in a way that doesn’t make you want to lose your mind.

For a moment, you wish that you were a sorority girl, surrounded by women who know all the cultural rules of what you’re about to walk into. It’s not in a “I’m not like other girls” way, but more in a “my parties consist of wine and boardgames”. You are excited, but you also just feel stupid.

You jump about half a foot in the air when your music cuts off all of a sudden and is replaced by the someone singing “save a horse, ride a cowboy” at far too many decibels. Scrambling, you grab your phone from the far side of your bed and see that it’s Jake trying to FaceTime.

“When did you change your ringtone?” Is the first thing you say when you pick up, endlessly irritated. “Your voice is terrible, by the way.”

Jake just laughs, “Oh, it absolutely is not. And you left your phone unlocked when you went to the bathroom two weeks ago, it was the only logical course of action. How have you not noticed til now?”

“I keep my phone on silent like a normal person.” You try to angle the camera so he can’t see the fact that you’re only in a sports bra and that you are absolutely not dressed despite the fact that you need to leave relatively soon.

“Again with this normal person thing, sweets,” He looks like he’s walking through the frat house as you hear people in the background, and you have half a mind to ask if Bradley’s around but decide against it. Something tells you Jake would be, well, weird about it. “You have got to be the least normal person I know, and that’s saying something.”

The absolutely unimpressed look on your face makes him laugh, and you almost hang up until you remember that he could potentially be helpful with your predicament. He wasn’t helpful last time but maybe this time he will be. He at least knows more about what girls are supposed to wear to this stuff.

“Jake...” You start, unsure of how to even ask.

‘Oh hey Jake, how am I supposed to dress slutty for the frat party you cajoled me into going to because this is really out of my comfort zone and I’m this close to just telling you we can do your stupid Naval aircraft idea so that I don’t have to deal with this’ is a decidedly bad start.

“Sweets...” He croons back at you over the phone as he sets you down on a bathroom counter.

It’s then that you realize that he’s been shirtless this entire time, and is still very much shirtless. Look, you may have a deep dislike for Jake Seresin as a person, but you’re not blind. You have eyes. And your eyes are telling you that Jake is absolutely so fucking fine that you have sort of forgotten your question.

He’s absentmindedly applying shaving cream to his face and bustling around the bathroom while opening drawers and humming to himself. You remain silent.

You just sort of stare at him for a few seconds before he raises an eyebrow at you. It’s then that you realize you’re holding your phone at an atrocious angle and you’re supposed to be asking him how to dress for this and showing him the insides of your nostrils is definitely not going to be doing you any favors.

“Sweets, did you have something you were going to say or are you just going to spend the next thirty minutes checking me out?” Jake says it so nonchalantly it almost makes you hang up, but you’re caught off guard by how something as simple as watching him shave on FaceTime can feel so endearing and domestic.

“Very funny. I was going to tell you you have something sticking out of your nose but I guess I won’t now.” You huff, hoping it’ll distract him from the last two minutes of silence.

At the very least, it works. Jake frantically tries to figure out what’s danging from his nose while you try and regroup.

“I need your help picking an outfit.” It’s dramatic, but it feels like a weight off your chest to say it, “I just– Well, it’s just that nothing looks good and I hate this.”

Jake sets his razor down and leans close to his phone so you can see only his face and nothing else, “Lemme see what’cha got, sweets.”

The next twenty minutes are, somehow, not entirely excruciatingly painful. Jake immediately vetoes every single one of your business casual outfits (“You are not wearing slacks to a frat party, sweets, be serious.”) but he’s nice about it. When you dive deep into your closet to pull out a box of items you haven’t thought about since you bought them freshman year, you really start to reconsider how much you don’t want to work on Naval mechanics.

“Okay, you can’t be mean, I bought these freshman year in a moment of weakness.” You can feel how hot your face is and you barely manage to get through the sentence without stammering or hanging up on him.

You lay out the tops on your bedding–Jake had already approved of a pair of jeans you hardly ever wore. These pieces are much more party-oriented than anything else you regularly wear, and you remember how for a weekend freshman year you’d felt so alienated, so weird, that you’d spent almost three-hundred dollars on going out tops. You’d returned most of them but the ones in front of you you’d kept in secret hope maybe you’d get to wear them.

“You are a liar.” Jake’s voice comes softly from your phone and you frown.

“I literally just asked you to not be mean. You can’t even not be mean when—”

“Sweets, any guy here would pass away at the sight of you in any of these,” He says and you make sure the camera isn’t on you so you can contort your face into a silent scream, “Talkin’ about, ‘I have nothing to wear’.”

“Drama queen.” It’s all you can say, but the thought of him passing away at the sight of you? That might be more appealing than you’d like to admit.

God, it’s so fucking loud in here. You managed to arrive fashionably late, as Jake advised. Now, you’re just sort of standing by the doorway, unsure of where to go or who to talk to.

Then, all of a sudden, Jake appears next to you, all bright eyes and white teeth as he bobs along to the music. He grabs your arm and pulls you into an excessively tight hug, one that smooshes your face into his chest and traps your arms at your sides. You try not to breathe in too hard, but you can’t really avoid smelling him (like a fucking weirdo). You’re only slightly disappointed to note that Jake smells really good.

“Sweets! I thought you’d bailed!” He exclaims, letting you go only slightly so he can take a look at your face. “When did you get here?”

“Um, like ten minutes ago?” You try and push out of his arms but he’s got a strong grip on you–glancing to the side you see that he’s grasped his elbows so you’re completely stuck.

“Only one hour and fifty minutes left to go!”

And with that, you’re being hauled off by one arm through the frat house. You stumble on your feet but manage to catch yourself on Jake when you trip over a beer can someone just threw on the ground. He turns around with a glint in his eye.

“Sweets, if you wanted to cuddle, you should’ve just said so!” His tone is gleeful, but he steadies you gently anyway.

“Just get me a drink, Jake.”

He doesn’t let you go but this time his grip is gentler and he walks at a human pace instead of trying to make record time. After turning a few corners, you finally arrive in the kitchen.

You have to admit, you’re sort of jealous. Your apartment isn’t tiny by any means, but you’d love to have a kitchen this sprawling, with its huge windows, what looks like a state of the art fridge, and granite countertops the sheer square footage of which could make you drool. You feel a rush of disappointment at how dirty it is in here, but you squash it remembering that this is a frat house. Clean is nowhere near part of these men’s vocabulary.

Jake makes you a drink that seems to be some odd combination of liquors and juices (he avoids the jungle juice thankfully, almost turning green when you ask him if you should try some–“Not unless you want to spend all of tomorrow throwing up.”). When he hands it to you, he looks at you expectantly, like a child who just gave their parent a crayon drawing.

“Well? What do you think?” You grimace on instinct when the liquid hits your tongue, but you realize it’s actually not that bad.

You tell him as much. Maybe you’re already starting to get drunk because it’s the only explanation for the way you think the look on his face could persuade you to drink three hundred cups of this if it means having him smile at you like that again. You keep drinking to avoid spilling your guts, figuratively.

Jake makes himself a cup while yammering on about planning the party, how he took shots with his frat brothers before you got here, and how he has a brunch planned Sunday with a few of his frat brothers. It’s all a bit too close, too intimate to be honest. Even with everyone around you, even with the way he almost has to yell so you can hear, it feels like it’s just the two of you. It makes you want to flee, but you force yourself to stay put in an effort to at least try.

And it’s not actually terrible. You keep sipping on the drink Jake made you, and try to engage with him.

He’s in the middle of telling you a story about him and Bradley from freshman year when one of his frat brothers walks up to the two of you with a wicked grin on his face.

“Now who is this, Jake?” He’s terribly handsome, but something about the way he’s looking at you sets you on edge.

“Javy, meet sweets.” Jake gestures at you with his perfectly iconic red solo cup.

You roll your eyes at the introduction, “That’s not my name.”

But Javy doesn’t let you correct the record, instead his entire face lights up. He looks like a kid on Christmas as he wraps an arm around Jake’s shoulders and looks between the two of you, a gleeful expression spreading over his face.

“You are famous in this frat, I hope you know that.”

You prepare yourself for a snide remark about your attitude in class, about your reputation, but instead Javy leans in close, so close that you can see how perfect his skin is (what the hell?), and he whispers conspiratorially, “Jake here never shuts up about you.”

The whisper clearly isn’t meant to keep much secret and Jake obvious hears him because he shoves Javy off him and starts waving his hands at him to shoo him off. When he turns back around, he’s blushing and you don’t think it’s from the alcohol or the heat.

“Talking shit?” You cross your arms and raise an eyebrow expectantly, not knowing what you’d do with any other explanations.

“Something like that. Want more to drink?”

He clearly doesn’t want to talk about it, and he clearly doesn’t want you to remember this conversation either, because his next pour is overly generous. After that, he drags you out of the kitchen to ‘socialize’. He keeps you next to him, occasionally slinging an arm around your shoulders or even just leaning on you.

Much to your dismay, Jake doesn’t let you wallflower, to disappear as you stand next to him–suddenly you’re being introduced to everyone in the frat. You grouse about being forced to remember a thousand different white men’s names and Jake’s laugh rises even above the din of the music and the chatter. You’re loath to admit it aloud, but it’s sort of nice, being included, being in on jokes and spoken to like you might have something funny or interesting to say.

Part of you wants to bring up what Javy said, because almost every guy that Jake introduces as being part of his frat smiles in the exact same way that Javy had. Like a cat who got the cream. But the alcohol is making your tongue heavy and you worry what might be said if you start down that path.

Then, you hear your name distantly, and you whip around to see Bradley making his way through the crowd waving wildly. Nearly missing elbowing some poor sorority girl in the head, he pushes past people. His face is flushed from drinking and the heat, and he’s got his phone pressed to his ear. Why he’s attempting to take a phone call in this type of environment, you’re really not sure.

When he gets to the both of you, he at least has the sense to hang up before he separates you from Jake when he sweeps you up into a bear hug that lifts your feet off the ground and crushes you to him. He seems so happy to see you, and you smile bashfully as you hug him back.

Once your feet are back on the ground and Bradley’s released you, you notice how Jake has stiffened slightly beside you. He and Bradley engage in some long, complicated handshake that ends with jazz hands and eventually Bradley sweeps away in just the same way he came over. No words are exchanged, and Jake relaxes when Bradley’s out of sight.

“You’re being weird,” You accuse, leaning into Jake so you can get closer to his ear to be heard over the noise, “Well, you’re always weird, but you were being weird towards Bradley.”

“Was not.” Jake says haughtily, pouting lightly like a child.

“You’re literally pouting right now.” You’re too tipsy to deal with him acting like you just took away his toy truck, and you poke his arm to emphasize your point.

Jake immediately schools his expression before taking you by the arm and pulling you outside. His broad form clears the way for you and you do your best not to trip on any more beer cans. You two aren’t alone by any means, but here the sound has space to dissipate. There’s beer pong tables, a bonfire going (which, frankly, seems very unsafe), and people milling about.

“Do you like Bradley?” The two of you are now standing off to the side of the sprawling deck behind the frat house, illuminated by a series of string lights that only seem slightly out of place for a frat house and Jake’s staring at you intently.

You shrug, “I mean, what’s not to like? It’s Bradley, I think we’re friends.”

This is so awkward and you hate it with every fiber of your being.

He wrings his hands just a bit, and it strikes you that there’s a chance that he’s actually upset. It’s not the kind of annoyed that he always seems to take on when you two are going at it, it’s more genuine, like whatever he’s imagining might be enough to get him really worked up. He opens his mouth but then shuts it.

“Jake. What is wrong with me liking Bradley.” This is so ridiculous–standing in the backyard and trying to get Jake to talk about whatever issues he has or doesn’t with Bradley is probably almost as close to the opposite of socializing as just staying home would have been.

“You don’t like like him, though, right?”

You roll your eyes and snap at him, “Jake, what is this, middle school?” He’s not calling you sweets, and when you notice, it bothers you just a tad more than you’d like to admit, “No, I like Bradley because he doesn’t yell at me when I correct his projections and he makes a mean chocolate chip cookie. He’s a friend.”

Everything about his demeanor changes in the oddest way when you say that, he peps up and it’s like the Jake that was pouty (jealous?) was never there, and he takes you by the hand, “Great! That’s solved then, let’s go play beer pong.”

You try to ignore the way you get emotional whiplash as he drags you over to the people standing around a folding table.

But you can’t help it. As Jake tries to teach you how to play beer pong you end up ruminating on whatever the hell that just was. Why would it bother Jake if you did “like like” Bradley? The two of you, you and Jake, could barely be classified as friends. Besides, as frat brothers, there’s no way both Jake and Bradley haven’t gotten around or even been with the same girl. No shame for anyone involved, but what’s his fucking deal? (And, Bradley’s a cutie, so what?)

Eventually, you give up trying to figure out what Jake’s issue is as the two of you start losing at beer pong, and badly, given just how inebriated you are. Jake keeps trying to shout instructions every time you go to throw the ping pong ball and it keeps messing you up, so eventually you shove at him. He barely moves as he starts laughing at your anger.

“Jake! Stop messing me up!” You can feel how bad your coordination is from the alcohol as you stumble a bit as you lean your weight into him. “You’re making us lose!”

He can barely breathe through how hard he’s laughing at how far off your last shot had been, but he still steadies the both of you and wraps his arms around you, “Sweets you’re just too easy to mess up, oh my god. Are you even looking at the cups?”

You just hit his chest once as you start taking in the way that you’re pressed up against each other. He doesn’t let go of you. Instead, he just sort of lets you step back enough to have full control of your arms and continues standing at your side with his arms around your waist. Then, he starts leaning down to breathe instructions in your ear.

Normally you would find it in yourself complain about how gross having his breath in your ear is, but in that moment, already past tipsy and just enjoying the warmth of his body and skin against yours, all you can do is shiver. You fuck up your next shot worse than the last one. You hope it’s dark enough to cover how flustered you are as the patio lights glimmer weakly in the distance.

It takes your remaining sober thoughts to refocus on beer pong instead of how hard it hits you that you want Jake.

It’s honestly the most fun you’ve had in a long, long, time and you lose yourself in it. Jake at your side, his arms wrapped around you, laughing loudly as you lose to team after team. He barely removes himself to make his shots. When he laughs it shakes your whole body. Every time he takes a step, he knocks your legs together so you move with him.

You’ve continued drinking so you’re only getting progressively drunker and it only makes you focus on him more. You lose track of time completely and wholly.

Every time you turn to look at him or talk to him, Jake’s already looking at you. He keeps looking at your lips. In that moment, your rivalry, the project, and really, the entire world falls away. You have nothing to think about but how warm he is, how good he smells, and how you want to keep this moment in a jar so you can come back to it later.

You think he might kiss you.

The moment breaks when you feel Jake’s phone start buzzing against your leg and he finally lets you go. In an instant, he takes a step back from you and his arms are gone. You didn’t realize just how much his body heat was keeping you warm in the cool evening air til he removes himself from you completely. You miss it immediately.

He steps off to the side, face completely impassive but frozen in a smile as he reads a text, and he starts typing furiously. The smile slides off your face as you think of all the girls in his phone who are probably waiting for his drunk “you up?” texts and you take a step back, putting more space between the two of you. Someone more important than you must want his attention.

“I, uh, I’ve got to go, sorry, sweets.” Jake says, but you don’t feel the apology as much as you do the rejection. It stings in the way a harsh winter wind burns at your cheeks, pricking your skin and raising the blood to your face.

Somewhere in your mind, you remember considering hooking up with someone tonight. That’s what people do, right? Get drunk, sleep with a stranger, then stumble home in last night’s outfit in the morning. And maybe somewhere along the way, maybe between drinks three and four, you’d thought about what it might be like to kiss Jake. At some point when you’d watched his eyes linger on your lips, you thought that was it.

You take a few steps back, trying to feel sober again, but swaying slightly without Jake to hold you, “Right.”

His face falls as he takes a step toward you, but the magic of the night is gone. There isn’t anyone standing on the opposite of the folding table anymore. The backyard is somehow too quiet despite the loudness coming from the house. Jake doesn’t reach for you when he sees the expression on your face.

“I’ll uh, venmo you for the Uber.” His face betrays nothing but the cool indifference you remember from freshman year–are you really back to where you started after everything tonight?

Him offering to pay for you only makes you remember that you hate him–flirting with you all night then ditching you to go hook up with someone he actually likes. Classic Jake Seresin, everybody.

You don’t care that he slept with someone else after how close the two of you were. You are deciding not to care. It does not bother you because you and Jake aren’t even friends, you are sworn enemies and the only reason you’re even going to these parties is so that you can ensure the project isn’t a flaming mess.

You’re repeating these mantras to yourself from the moment you wake up, while you go to classes, while you avoid making eye contact with or speaking to Jake for fear he’ll know. You say it to yourself as you sit silently across from him in the library, headphones firmly over your ears so you don’t have to hear him ask if you want coffee.

He brings you one anyway.

It’s clear that you are utterly failing to convince yourself, because all you can think about is how close he was, how the heat radiated off his body, how he smelled, and how his eyes flitted down to your lips ever so often. You feel like you want to crawl out of your own skin with the realization that you want Jake to want you. You’ve sort of always wanted his attention, it’s just that up until now it’s almost entirely been in the form of your little rivalry.

You find yourself scoffing as a thought comes to the forefront of your mind, It’s like in those romance novels. That shit does not happen to people like you.

The shame and desire washing through you reaches its peak when you find yourself biting into your fist with your hand between your legs a week after the party. All you can think about is how he’d smelled, how close he’d been to you, and the way his hands felt around your waist. You finish with a whine tearing itself from your chest and a deep sort of mortification coursing through your veins.

You can’t avoid him forever though, the work must go on.

The thought of attraction goes as quickly as it comes when you find yourself sitting across from him at his and Bradley’s kitchen table again, the two of you bickering about a piece of analysis.

“Why do you refuse to listen to me, even the slightest bit, sweets? I’m literally second in our class, I can’t be an absolute idiot.” Jake looks at the ceiling as if some supernatural being will give him the strength to deal with you, and sighs heavily.

You clench your fists, “I’m not refusing to listen to you, Jake, I’m just telling you that you’re wrong.” You don’t remind him you’re first in the class.

Bradley walks in the kitchen, phone held casually in front of his face, a bag of chips grasped in his other hand. He stops to observe the two of you still arguing, now going on about a quiz question you two had disagreed on first semester sophomore year. He could be surprised that you and Jake have found something else to argue about, but then again Jake told him the two of you spent almost three straight hours arguing your first time together at the library. He’s also been witness to countless pointless fights about god knows what since the beginning of the semester.

“Can you two just fuck already, good god.”

The room goes so quiet the only thing you can hear in your ears is your own heartbeat. Jake looks similarly mortified, cheeks turning red as he tucks his head to the side in clear embarrassment. The tips of his ears are bright red.

Bradley, unaware of the absolute nuclear bomb that he just dropped, tucks his chips into the pantry, and leaves as the FaceTime call sound starts trilling from his phone.

Neither you or Jake move. All you can think about is how you felt in that moment last Friday, Jake pressed up against you, his breath heavy in your ear, and his body solid and warm against you. You think about the way want had coursed through your veins when you’d been alone. But he doesn’t want you. His current reaction is evidence enough.

Jake’s the one to break the silence by muttering something under his breath.

“What?”

“I said, he’s one to talk.” He clears his throat and avoids eye contact.

You can’t take this, so you try to laugh a bit, but it sounds fake and tinny in your ears, “And I don’t know what he’s talking about. In case everyone’s lost their minds and forgotten, I do not like you, Jake Seresin.”

He laughs lightly in response and says, “People don’t use contractions when they’re lying.”

And you don’t really know what to say to that. Because you don’t really know if there is anything to say. So you decide not to say anything to that, at all.

“You still owe me twenty five dollars for the Uber.”

“Twenty five—“ Jake sputters, “Twenty five American dollars? Where the hell did you have him take you? Downtown and back!? You live twelve minutes from the house!”

“I tipped well.”

Jake mutters something about tipping culture being out of control but you still feel the way your phone buzzes so hard it rattles some pens strewn across the table.

When the second invite comes, you decide preemptively that you’re not going to drink. Your deal with Jake was about attending and staying for two hours, it said absolutely nothing about drinking or generally partaking in party activities. You don’t want a repeat of last time–you want the arousal that spikes your bloodstream every time you see his face to disappear as quickly as it came.

You’re avoiding Jake in the frat house by ducking into doorways and keeping an eye out for a blonde head of hair the best you can. At one point, Bradley spots you and sends a confused look your way, clearly scanning for Jake. He doesn’t do anything about it, you guess, because Jake doesn’t come running within the next ten minutes.

Keeping yourself pressed to the wall where the music isn’t so loud but you also can’t hear the way people are very obviously doing drugs in the bathroom, you count down the minutes til you can leave.

About five minutes before, you decide to sneak a peek in the kitchen one last time. Maybe you can rob these assholes of some Oreos or something as divine punishment–revenge of the nerds, or whatever.

When you get to the kitchen, you realize you’ve found Jake. His back is to you, and he seems to be holding court. Surrounding him is a group of frat brothers most of whom you don’t remember, with the exception of Javy, who’s leaning his elbows on the countertop and listening about as intently as a drunk person can.

“She’s fucking stuck up man, I don’t know how you do it. I don’t think being that obnoxious is a requirement to be top of the class.” One of the frat brothers that usually surrounds Jake scoffs.

You feel all the blood drain from your face and you suddenly feel like being sick. Backing away from the doorway to the kitchen you almost trip over your feet at the speed you’re trying to get away from the conversation, from Jake, from the frat house.

There it is–there’s your out. Your ick, if you will. Jake, standing in his perfect kitchen, surrounded by a bunch of barely matured fraternity bros, talking shit about you. It’s not that the feelings of hatred weren’t technically mutual, but the extent to which you complain about Jake is usually limited to surface level shit.

If you had stuck around for just a moment longer, you would’ve heard the way that he defended you over a chorus of agreement from around him, “C’mon man, it’s not like that. Don’t say shit like that about her. She’s under a lot of pressure and you’re kind of a dick in class anyway.”

But you don’t stick around. Instead, you push your way through the mass of bodies, accidentally stumble through a smoke circle, and you still seem so far away from the exit. You pass by Bradley again, and this time he’s with the girl that he insists is just a friend, but they seem too cozy for that in the moment. You don’t stop to say hi.

When you finally get outside, your chest is heaving and you think you might be sick, alcohol aside.

This is exactly why you focus on academics. They gave back as good as they got, never betrayed you, never let their friends talk shit about you. Academics never called you “stuck up”, stopping short of biting out the insult “bitch”. God you’re so stupid.

You should’ve never let him get close, you should’ve stuck to the project and just finished it without ever learning more about Jake beyond the bare minimum. No evenings spent crowded around a countertop covered in textbooks and notes, Bradley humming in the background as he cooked something delicious. No letting Jake buy you coffee or cafeteria food.

This is exactly what you deserve for letting him in.

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