#merc assignment game

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

I would have you merc assign my dad but unfortunately two of his key traits are “French” and “left my mom” so I can’t really participate :(

I'm kin assigning you Scout

[threepandas]

Bad End: Preserve Us

You know how in conservation biology you sometimes try to introduce a pair to be mated and one will just... just fuckin' merc' the other? Just absolutely obliterate them in a hissing, growling, nightmare ball of fury? Before anyone can stop them? Territorial and (to put it lightly) "uninterested", dispite your desperate desire to save their species from extinction, and need for them to get frisky?

I know.

Holy SHIT do I know.

There's a lot of reasons. Ways you can (hopefully) get around it. But first? Is finding out WHY it happened. Was it just the one? The environment? Were they sick? Or... as is the case sometimes, did they decide their Handler was their mate? Some species only mate once. Are loyal for life. You gotta work around that.

Which is all well and fine and good.

When we're talking about ANIMALS.

Non-sentient, non-sapient animals! Not ALIEN SPECIES! What the ABSOLUTE FRESH HELL did they expect from me!? Compliance?! This was UNETHICAL! Monstrous! I had been trying to slip my gaurds long enough to radio for help SINCE I GOT HERE.

I hope the fuckers ROTTED in whatever their Gods considered a Hell.

"Conservation facility" my ENTIRE ASS. You can't run CONSERVATION EFFORTS like this on SENTIENTS. Eugenics loving, atrocity fetishizing, immoral BASTARDS!!! And they KNEW it too. They HAD too! Or they wouldn't be HIDING it! Fucking KIDNAPPING scientists! Biologists! Doctors!

I was on my ways to study Lekku monkeys!

God...

I'm? I'm so tired of being pissed.

Furious and outraged and SCARED. Horrified and sick. There are PEOPLE here. Kids! And I don't... oh god, I don't... H-How LONG has this been going ON? Why did no one NOTICE?

Every day I feel my heart break. The desire to scream and scream and never STOP, grow inside me. I have to get out. I have to get us ALL out. Get these people FREE. Do SOMETHING. But I am forced to "conserve" the species assigned to me. The group assigned to me.

It's killing my love for the field. Making a mockery of everything I worked for.

I don't... I don't think my hands will ever be clean again.

But I have to help. Do everything I can. Make hell a little kinder, if nothing else. At least while I figure out a way OUT. My group deserves better. The groups I do not work with, deserve better.

I disguise games as "testing". Pages and pages of meaningless numbers ans scores. INSIST that enrichment is the key to success. Diet is EVERYTHING. Oh, and habitat? Well unless we can mimic their habitat there's no WAY they'll "breed".

No, no, using machines would stress them out too much.

It's like you DONT want babies!

Who's the expert here? That's RIGHT! Dr. Cho, but FAILING her and like five other people? Me. And I know for a FACT they are pulling the same scam. We ALL fucking hate you. Dr. Cho has KIDS, you FUCKS. Hasn't seen her son in YEARS thanks to you bastards. He was engaged. She's probably missed his WEDDING thanks to you!

Getting distracted, spiraling again, gotta stop DOING that.

It wont help anyone.

But God, if my brain doesn't slowly feel like it's shorting out the longer I'm here. Stress is called the silent killer for a reason. Or what that something else? Fuck. I can't even look it up! Bastards cut us off from the galactic web. Full information blackout. Because of COURSE they did... can't risk us rightfully calling for help.

Getting the Feds involved to shut this hell pit of a black site DOWN. Or a "whatever it truely is" site. Because it sure as SHIT has nothing to do with conservational biology. Except maybe the abuse of it.

But that doesn't help me right now.

Focus, damn it!

The Yanderens. Old, absurdly rare, nearly extinct, with a home planet they'd reduced to uninhabitable wastelands millennia ago due too... something. No one knew what. There had definitely been fighting. It WAS documented they were excellent fighters. Ruthless ones at that. But it was ALSO documented they strongly pack bonded.

There had been a lot of strongly worded warnings on what few documation my captures were able to find, translate, then shove at me. But honestly? They said the same thing about humans. Ooooh big scary persistent hunters~ oh nooooo! Watch out for the omnivores with a history of war! Sins of the father and we are defined by our diets! Class systems! Let's all JUDGE each ooooootheeeeer~!

Yeah, no. Not buying it.

Especially when the "warnings" were so damn vague and poorly documented. All "the HORRORS!" and "we barely SURVIVED!". Cause honestly? The Yanderens I was watching over? Easily the most mild and temperate individuals I had ever met. No tantrums from the kids, no big emotional meltdowns, just curiosity and at WORST? Mild frustration.

It made everything ten thousand times worse for me, that these poor people were in this hellish place. They were calm. Curious. Meant for greater, BETTER things! They should be out, playing and learning. Exploring and enjoying peaceful strolls in some art gallery or zen garden somewhere! Not... not this sterile fucking LAB.

But then M-17 loses his SHIT.

And now I'm kinda panicking. Because F-6 is not just dead, God rest her soul (she didn't deserve this. Oh god. She was so SWEET.), but M-17 might just be too, soon. If I can't find out what HAPPENED. Because if he's "feral" or "diseased" or whatever other horrifying terminology they end up using? They DO something about it.

And I can't actually stop them.

I... I don't know if it was a trauma response. Or I did something wrong. I could PROBABLY pass it off as my needing more studies into their observed "mating habits"? That... that I somehow... turned it... uuuuh... dominance battle? Shit. Where are my notes?!

F-6 is DEAD and its all my fault.

She was such a cuddle fiend too. Always excited to hear about my studies, from before. My life. Wanted to join me after we got out of here. I never should have let her volunteer. Granted, she wouldn't have taken no for an answer. Wanted to spend the pregnancy plotting our escape. Asked me to help raise the kid once we got out. Had a whole grand plan. But I...And I...

God...

I should have said NO. Insisted. It was just so hard, when F-6 had made it all sound like it would be okay. Like she had a plan and all I need to do was trust her. Believe in her. Then we could be free.

I had hoped M-17 would work best. He was always the most agreeable and quick on the uptake. I figured... well... ha ha. God, I'm such an IDIOT. I should have CHECKED. Who KNOWS what happened before I arrived? What triggered I just accidentally rammed my foot into? FUCK! I sweep everything from me desk onto the ground. Don't give I shit that I'll have to clean it up later,

I had figured M-17 would be COOL with it.

This place is getting to me, isn't it?

Why the FUCK would anyone be COOL with getting jumped? Bred like an animal? Shoved in some random ass room, with a vaguely familiar stranger, and told "now fuck. We want a literal litter from you two"? All while some biologist watchs and makes god damned NOTES!?

Of course he fought back. OF COURSE he didn't stop!

The only one there he could trust was himself.

I...I'm becoming a monster... aren't I?

Oh god.

At least we're in the satellite facility. The gaurds are definitely going to rat me out, but the news will take time to filter back. And... and the Yanderens being so "dangerous" might work in my favor. I... I can spin this. I HAVE to spin this. I can't let TWO people die for my fuck up.

I promised myself I would get as many people out as I could. I refuse to back out now. Even if that means crying, puking, then going out there to lie my ASS off. This was TOTALLY NORMAL. In fact, expected! Yep! It means that's we've determined that M-17 is the alpha Yanderen! A thing that is both REAL and possible to BE!

I rinse my mouth, stomach empty. Crying has exhausted me. But I can't give up. Too many lives count on me now. I... I wish so badly I was just a nobody again. Just some random biology student, trying to make a name for herself. Being "important" is a CURSE.

I try not to chug my water as I half stumble out of the glorified shoebox that is my bathroom into the much larger and Fancier CLOSET that is my room. Truely, no expense spared, for the captives they ripped away from their lives. So glad I am here willingly and of my own volition.

I gather myself. Finally ready to go and try to untangle the mess I have made of everything. When a deep booming alarm rattles my bones. The lights flickering to red. Blast doors slide down, SLAM shut over the transparent recessed bit of wall that counts as my window, the door to the rest of the facility.

Trapping me inside my small room.

Almost immediately after, an EXPLOSION rocks the world hard enough to knock me from my feet. Only the bed's limited padding keeping me from a nasty concussion. The edge of it still ramming painfully into my shoulder. Another explosion. Then another. I sit for a long, terrible, second stunned.

The moment passes.

I scramble on my hands and knees for the in facility communication device that I had knocked from my desk in anger, grief. Not daring to stand lest I be thrown down again. I manage to find it as the world shakes again for the fifth time. Followed by what sounds like gun fire out in the halls.

I fling myself back towards my shitty little bunk. Drag every bit of padding and protection I can, down and under it with me. If the roof goes? I want shock absorption. If shots get through the door? I want something to slow those blasts down. Anything. ANYTHING! To increase my fucked chances of surviving.

I burrito up and wriggle back as deep as I can. The world muffled but ending just outside my crawlspace. Then I desperately try to get one of the others on the line. I got nothing but chaos. Running. Running. Hiding. And Dead.

Dead. Dying.

Remember me.

And GONE.

Some of them fighting with their groups too freedom. Some being targeted right along side their captors. Others savaged by the ACTUAL animals they had been working with, the one's Galacticly deemed too dangerous for effort like this. Someone or something had set EVERYONE free. A simultaneous attack on all fronts that our captors could not put down or escape.

The Yanderens were out there.

Oh god. Please let them be okay. They wer-

My thoughts ground to a halt as M-32 LAUNCHED his tiny body onto the screen of one of the security feeds I was desperately looking through. F-6 had figured out how to get us a backdoor to them a long time ago. M-32 was just a kid. A small, soft, cuddly little thing that loved to lean against me and crawl into my lap. All cherubic cheeks and cute little curls. Shy!

Yet I watched... in mounting horror... as like a lion on some unfortunate animal, he landed on a gaurds back. Small arms going around his body in a mockery of a hug. Head tilting so he could BITE at the back of the man's neck, small hands clawing and ripping at weak points in his armor, as he screamed. Thrashed. Tried desperately to get M-32 OFF of him.

There was so much blood.

My hands were shaking. So much, I accidentally hit the next screen button. Jerked my thumb back. But... but oh god. There was F-26. Using the butt of a rifle to slam down against the head of a scientist. Again and again and again. Long after the begging and thrashing stopped. I flipped again. M-4? No... please not M-4. Not the soft spoken and wise...

I watched as he grinned, a cold thing, and shot out another joint. His foot on the chest of the head scientist who had moved him to a different group. In the background, his supervisor lay dead. They had not died quickly. The head scientist was begging. A mess of tears and pain. M-4 shot another joint, pressing his foot down harder.

I wanted to be sick.

I flipped again. And again. And AGAIN.

H...Had I known them at ALL? Like demons wearing the faces of those I'd known. People I'd trusted. Not a SINGLE ONE was... oh... oh god. F-6. Had she been too? Would I have ever known? Was THIS what all those warnings meant? I couldn't think. Couldn't breath. Had... Had never had a panic attack but... BUT-!

I wheezed.

Shook.

"Oh, Clever giiiirl~" A familiar voice sang, before a blood splattered face flickered into being on the screen in my hands. "Where aaaare yoooou~?"

M-17. He'd somehow managed to take over the security cameras. That or the communication feed. His eyes were bright. A grin on his face like I'd never seen from him. ALIVE in a way I'd never seen him. The excitement transformed his face. No longer softly doll like, but something DANGEROUS. Unhinged. His eyes dilated and deadly teeth on display.

"Come out, come out wherever you aaaare~. I have so much to TELL you! We have so much to DO! I'm going to make you MINE sweetheart! No one else can have you. So come out. I won't hurt you much, I promise! Just gotta make you mine then we can leave okay~?"

Furious snarls echoed through the halls. Male and female alike. Old and young. I... I recognized each of those voices. What was HAPPENING?

"Aaaah? Did you TRASH really think you DESERVED her? Ha! Please." M-17 grin was cruel. Mocking. "You don't have a chance in hell of taking what's MINE."

His eyes seems to shift away from unseen enemies and back, somehow, to me. Warming to something euphoric. Resting his head on his hand as if to consider me. His fingers spread, stroking his own face, as if the desire to TOUCH was simply too great. As if what he was imagining was bleeding over into the real world.

"Oh clever girl~ my clever, clever girl~♡ I can't wait til it's just you and ME. Start think of where you want to go first, okay? We're going to get married. Have that child you wanted me for. All the things you ever dreamed~♡ I'm going to have you all to myself. No more annoying others. Ah~ can't wait to find you soon!"

"But first?"

"May the best of us Win."

[babydollmarauders]

MEDIA MANAGEMENT— JACK HUGHES (PART NINE)

1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 5.5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9

notes: i’m finally up to the games that i attended! pictures 5 and 9 were taken by me at this game! fun fact: dawson and the equipment guy actually posed for that pic for me after his hat trick <3

y/ndevils00

liked by dawson1417, john.marino97, and 34,186 others

y/ndevils00 hey! hi! how are ya?! i’m great thanks for asking because MY BEST FRIEND GOT HIS VERY FIRST HAT TRICK!!

let me preface tonight’s recap post by saying that i’m aware that there were 3 goal scorers in tonights 5-1 win against the penguins, and i’m proud of dougie, timo, and ALL of the guys for their hard work tonight. however, tonight’s recap is slightly different because it’s focused mainly on my very own best friend!

my puppy, my sun, the godfather to my child, best friend number 1, my favorite person in the world (jack look away), dawson mercer. you got your first career hat trick and i could not be more proud of you! i’m so glad i was healed from my debilitating illness (i had a cold) and was able to witness it in person! i’m not saying i’m your lucky charm but… slap me in green and call me a leprechaun! 🍀

i’m so happy for you, dawson! i love you so very much! here’s to this being the first of very many!

p.s. it would not be a y/n postgame post if i didn’t have a couple pics of my favorite ipad kid snuck in there <3 you did great tonight, my beautiful princess!

tagged dawson1417 and jackhughes

dawson1417 thank you best friend number 3! i’m glad you were there to see me hit this milestone! here’s to many more! love you so very much! ❤️

y/ndevils00 you are actually my very favorite person in this entire world! i’m so insanely over the moon for you right now! drinks?

dawson1417 drinks!

user68 wait i always thought the “best friend number 1 and 2” was just y/n being silly about dawson and marino, but they actually have assigned numbers?! 🥹 that’s so cute!

jackhughes so happy for you merc! @/dawson1417

dawson1417 thanks hughesy! ‘preciate it!

y/ndevils00 my two favorite people 🥹 where’s my other?!

trevorzegras @/y/ndevils00 right here!

y/ndevils00 @/trevorzegras k well we all know i wasn’t talking about u, lucifer’s favorite child

john.marino97 @/y/ndevils00 i’m scared to ask but is it me?

y/ndevils00 @/john.marino97 THERE HE IS! all 3 of my people <3

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 you’re being lovey to marino… how much did you drink tonight babe?

y/ndevils00 oh so much

john.marino97 @/dawson1417 so proud of you man!

dawson1417 thanks bro!

y/ndevils00 my boys 🥹

john.marino97 @/y/ndevils00 you’re weirding me out now. stop being nice. it’s unnatural

y/ndevils00 alright ur done. ur booted down with trevor

trevorzegras @/y/ndevils00 what did i ever do to you?!

y/ndevils00 @/trevorzegras exist.

jackhughes babe, you gotta stop referring to our cat as your child. you’re gonna make people think we actually have a kid

y/ndevils00 we literally do?? lil satan IS our child

jackhughes she’s a cat.

y/ndevils00 @/nicohischier you’ve gained a child and a y/n. congratulations!

nicohischier yay! i’ve always wanted those!

jackhughes @/nicohischier stay away from MY y/n!

trevorzegras i don’t go here but congrats dude!

dawson1417 thanks dude!

y/ndevils00 stay away from my best friend, demon!

trevorzegras @/y/ndevils00 doesn’t feel too good does it?! stay away from jimbo!

y/ndevils00 too late! we already have a snap streak!

trevorzegras @/jamie.drysdale tell me it isn’t so!

jamie.drysdale do you want the truth or a lie?

nicohischier congratulations merc! ❤️

dawson1417 thank you cap!

jesperbratt did you take that last picture through the glass?

y/ndevils00 yes. but i think you forgot something….

jesperbratt congrats @/dawson1417 !

dawson1417 thanks bratter!

y/ndevils00 much better

[ghostiguro]

shamwow ref sheet, finally!!!!! :D

figuring out how to draw them was tough, still ironing out their design a bit, but overall i'm happy with how it looks. :3

you know what time it is-- ramble that no one asked for, aw yeahhh.

firstly, when designing them i for sure knew i wanted their design to be fuzzy & inspired by a tarantula; i know they're supposed to be a jumping spider but.. don't care, fuzzy spider supremacy. also tarantulas have weirdly adorable paws?? i love it.

their eye colour is supposed to be somewhere between red & violet; they look a bit more pink than i intended, so i'll probably adjust that as time goes by.

final thing i wanna add about their design specifically; because they are the eldest sibling, & it's insinuated that they absolutely merced all the other gods, i wanted their design to stand out more & be a little more fancy to show their status. i want to eventually add more details cuz i feel like i could make it look way cooler, but this is good for now. :3

it's made clear in the game that the bishops relied on the crowns to work around their disabilities, so when shamura is indoctrinated into the cult, they struggle a LOT with their head injury. their symptoms including, but not limited to; memory loss, poor facial recognition, visual trouble, brain fog, migraines, loss of fine motor skills, lack of balance & coordination, vertigo, struggles with vocabulary (stutters, can't find words, or sometimes makes up their own words), they often repeat things that don't really have much meaning, hand tremors, hallucinations, etc. they start out really bad, & their injury would be far worse if it weren't for the fact that they're a god & the crown prevented the injury from being as bad as it could have been. their siblings are all very patient with them, & the lamb assigns them a buddy as they begin to recover & are able to move around the cult grounds more. they eventually get to a point where they're able to function, still with moderate memory loss & brain fog, as well as migraines & hand tremors, but it takes them a *long* time to get to that point.

in their free time, they used to enjoy sewing & reading, but due to their injury, they struggle a lot with it which frustrates them to no end. they later get glasses to help with their vision so they can read, & learn how to knit & crochet, as sewing is a bit hard when your hands are constantly shaking & you're holding a tiny needle & thread.

later on in their recovery, they start helping out around the cult, doing a little bit of everything; they help the lamb with everyday duties when they can, usually small errands like delivering & retrieving items (they write them a little note in case they get lost along the way; shamura holds onto many of these notes, & have a basket in their room filled with notes they've collected over time); they help leshy in the farm/garden, heket in the kitchen when she's chefing it up, & kallamar in the healing bay, & occasionally keeps him company while he paints or crafts things. eventually, shamura & narinder are able to repair their relationship-- i haven't figured out what exactly narinder's tasks & hobbies are yet but they would keep him company & help when they can, too.

ok this is getting long so i'm gonna leave it here for now. :3

now i just have to finish the lamb & goat, & then all the rest of the characters & cult members... hoo boy.

[blubushie]

Hey it's bitching hour guy again, I'm gonna bitch again. So you know the team as family headcannon? Assign stereotypical nuclear family roles onto the mercs for easier funny moments or to show how close the mercs are. I'm so so so tired of it. Pyro and scout are the kids in the family, engie the dad, medic the tired mom, sniper the weird uncle you barely talk to, etc etc. 1st, infantilism to scout and pyro despite them being both grown ass murderers who happen to have mental issues (pyro outright seeing the word very differently and scouts immaturity plus possible other mental issues) and also because scout looks young even though he can legally drink and drive. A lot of people use it to excuse disliking a ship which is fine as long as you're not outright hating but also seeing "oh I just see them as family :)))))" on art tagged with the ship drives me up the wall. Also throwing the nuclear family roles onto the mercs often erases parts of their character, for example a lot of people forget how much of a dick engineer can be if he wants to because they only view him as 'polite southern dad'. Hell, the mercs do care about each other and they are kind of a found family but family doesn't need to have the nuclear tropes. Let scout and pyro be adults, look at engineers voice lines, and for the love of god play the game or touch some grass.

(sorry that this long thing is in here again, I am filled with rage and empowered by anon)

"For the love of god play the game or touch some grass" YES!! YES!!

I think a lot of TF2 fandom issues could be solved it people just actually played the fucken game/listened to the voice lines instead of engaging ONLY with the echo chamber that is the fandom...

[subnautica-reviews]

What if the TF2 mercs were a persona party?

Let’s assign arcana to each merc first and go from there.

To begin, each wildcard saga persona party has 5 guaranteed arcana within them, those being: Fool, Magician, Lovers, Emperor and High Priestess. The fool is the MC, the Magician is the immature one (usually also the party perv), the lovers is the popular girl, the emperor is the dad friend and the priestess is the socially awkward girl. I will be taking liberties as none of the mercs are confirmed to be women. You’d think chariot is in here but aigis was changed from chariot to aeon so i can’t really call it a mainstay.

Magician is the easiest: Scout. Jeremy fits all the requirements, down to actually falling for one specific girl whom he can’t be with (miss pauling)

Emperor: Spy. Literally Scout’s dad.

Fool: Heavy. He’s the face of TF2. The mascot who recieved the most amount of attention outside the game’s community. He’d be the MC.

Lovers: Soldier. A quick google search shows that among players Soldier is the most popular class, making him the popular girl of the party (he also has a canon love interest in Heavy’s sister, which for a persona game can easily be shifted into soldier x heavy)

High Priestess: the most difficult one to pick but i’m going with Pyro. They seem the least social of the group, no further explenation needed.

Now we need to assign arcana to the remaining 4 mercs.

Medic: Devil. Look what else is medic gonna be? This man is such a devil he outdevilled the devil.

Demoman: his constant drunkenness and despair leads me to believe he is wasting his potential in life, which implies Fortune arcana for him.

I’m not certain about Sniper and Engie, so if you have any suggestions for their arcana please let me know.

[lifesupreme-if]

sorry if this is intrusive but what’s this crossover that keeps getting mentioned with your girlfriend? is it something you can talk about or it supposed to be private? sorry again if this is too much have a nice day

brigid and i screamed, high fived, and started jumping around in their room and yelling about this ask thank you so much

the crossover is between lost birds (@if-lostbirds), my favorite western dystopian post-apocalyptic-and-also-on-the-verge-of-the-apocalypse sci-fi game, and a life supreme! the cast of a life supreme remains in their original universe and positions while the lost birds cast crosses over into the world of cyberpunk 2077.

find brigid's take on it here

dylan remains a fixer but the merc who takes the place of The Merc and stands by her side most prominently is the gunslinger/eli sharpe, born the child of some arasaka executives and run away. they are Disgustingly in love and obsessed with each other because they both are characters with an insane sense of devotion and loyalty. sharpe would kill for her, has, would throw themself into certain death for her — and dylan, in all of her love for them, would pull them back from it: her greatest merc is also her greatest weakness.

(shoutout to the AU within an AU where the two of them stayed at arasaka and fall headfirst into the most toxic, loyal, blood-bound relationship that will kill them both)

stéphanie interacts most prominently with the ghost and the traitor/william rhys, both of which she's brought into her home without a second thought for stranger danger.

ghost is still an odd thing that doesn't talk and can throw a grown man over their head, but they look like a lost and hungry child and so stéph is keeping them and feeding them. they are polite and quiet and helpful, working in the kitchen with stéph and owning all of her heart.

william washed up on the shores of pacifica and though he's skittish, clumsy, and awkward, stéph's taken him in and thrown him to work front of house for the diner. when he wakes screaming in the middle of the night, she offers kindness, a listening ear, and a warm mug at her table. (they're only a year apart in age and naturally they are developing the biggest crushes on one another.)

dorothea is of the roving band of nomads that snuck the ghost into the city after picking them up from a desolate area of the NUSA.

[locked] is assigned the hunter as a corporate bodyguard. only one fleshy limb between the two of them, and both with reputations with teeth, they open their soft sides to each other. contractually speaking, she owns them. in practice, however, she's wrapped around their finger, happy to find a friend, and in love with them—they dig up old vids from the hunter's baseball playing past and watch them together.

while aspects of the crossover mimic the plot of A Life Supreme to get the ball rolling, the merc is not there to connect everyone together, and so it does not follow the same storyline. the ranger/swann and the archangel take on an antagonistic role that targets eli sharpe and features them amongst their grandest plans. dylan, for fear of the sway archangel has, has no choice but to send sharpe on the jobs given from them.

little tidbits under the cut because i will take ANY opportunity to talk about this crossover thank you so much!!!!!!

• dylan and sharpe both work on getting sober together.

• they also do things like stare at each other uncomfortably and kiss with tongue in public. the mox have been trying to find a way to kick them out of lizzie's for months.

• sharpe is widely known as dylan riley's attack dog: they are aware of this. they revel in this. they do scare off other mercs, sometimes.

• rhys watched vids on chivalry to learn how to treat stéphanie in a relationship, and also he is. a foot and a half taller than her. stéphanie is THRIVING.

• ghost, stéphanie, and rhys all sleep in the same bed together at night: rhys is too tall for the bed, stéph starfishes over him, and ghost curls up like a cat on top of them both.

• [locked] and the hunter look frightening in public and then go home and infodump about old movies together.

• the hunter cherishes the feeling of [locked]'s human hand against their skin. they hold it to their face in tender moments.

[voltrixz]

 Why YOU should go vote for Montana/Shocker (TSSM) in @cartoon-character-competition​

Once again, this is the first time I have managed to get Shocker into a competition which once again is a crime in itself 

And like before you guys might be familiar with Shocker or Montana (even if they are a bit less known then villains like Electro or Doc Ock) (especially for Montana)

You see in TSSM, Montana is Shocker, not Herman as he’s known in the comics. Montana and Herman are different people in the comics but here Montana is essentially Herman but cooler and more skilled.

Montana is your usual merc hired by the big bad guy (or the big man as they call him) that runs a lot of the crime in NY. In episode one he’s hired to defeat spiderman along with his partners and they’re known as the enforcers 

(The enforcers as seen in ep 1) (From left to right: Fancy Dan, Ox and of course Montana) 

and well they’re defeated of course but Montana never gets capture and manages to run off

So when does Montana get that funny pineapple patterned suit? Well in ep 4, Market Forces, Montana is seen stealing that exact funny pineapple patterned suit and handing it over to his boss before about to go on his merry way and putting on his cowboy hat again before being stopped and told to wear the suit and stop spiderman as he still owes them (visibily pissed off at being told to not wear his hat (which is silly to me) (LET HIM WEAR HIS COWBOY HAT!!!!)but grins when being told about his new assignment)  

and so peter is led over to where shocker is by flint and alex (2 criminals who will become major villains later) 

and well shocker does what he does best, FUCK SHIT UP!!!!!!

and whats funnier is his first line to Spiderman is “I reckon that came as a bit of a real SHOCKER eh bug” He fuckin starts off a fight with a fuckin PUN (I love him for that)(its in his subtle himbo coding) and you want to know what else? When asked who exactly Montana is by Spiderman, Montana comes up with a villain name right on the spot and well guess what he chooses? He chooses his INITAL FUCKIN PUN (still love him for that) and well he absoutely destroys spiderman and even picks him up like a wet cat 

either spiderman weighs like nothing or shocker is just REALLY strong 

and well Montana goes off to his bar, just to enjoy a game of 8 ball with a job well done 

(hehe look at him, just enjoying a game of pool ^^ )

that is until well obviously spiderman isnt just gonna say down so Montana is stopped by his boss (cant believe he interrupted his game of pool, you cant do this to him) and he’s sent right back to fight Spiderman 

and well you know how it goes, he’s defeated (SPIDERMAN LITERALLY DROPS AN ENITRE BUILDING ON THIS GUY LIKE??? OK????) but yeah off to jail ig

So what happens next is basically 

- Thanks to Doc Ock and his plan to form the sinister six, he breaks out of jail and joins the sinister six by orders of his boss

- is defeated once again by Spiderman and taken to jail

- doesnt join the next formation of the sinister six sadly (crying coping tossing everything)

- however he comes back with his enforcer partners, now with his partners rocking new suits too 

(as seen here) (they’re robbing a bank btw) (cute things to do with your boyfriends: rob a bank!)

- but yeah once again defeated by spiderman and all of them are tossed to jail

- seen in big jail breakout scene but sadly does not escape 

- and who knows maybe we could have seen Shocker rejoin the sinister six or get up to new silly things (criminal activity) with his partners but erm

Tssm got cancelled as I mentioned before in my electro post so yeah (crying dying coping sobbing kicking everything tossing everything RAGHH)

but yeah shocker is cool as hell and gives me immense gender envy 

like LOOK AT HIM!!!!

need to be him so so bad (the gender envy he gives me is INSANE)(also has made me realize hm i may be queer aroaceflux) 

(he has a resting bitch face and its so silly to me) (yes im just using this as an opprtiunity to show you images of him)

sigh sigh LOVE YOU SHOCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

also he is gay and polyam coded as hell!!!!!! um something something why do you work in such a man dominated field? Do you want to be dominated by men? And also um that one thing of “detectives will always go: here’s my partner. erm ok???? 🏳️‍🌈???? but its just “mercs will always go: here’s my partner(s) like ok???🏳️‍🌈??? (not kidding he almost always refers to dan and ox as his partners and also just look at him, he is THE gay cowboy merc ever

but yeah LOVE YOU SHOCKER!!!! THE GAY COWBOY MERC/VILLAIN EVER!!!!!!!!! GO VOTE FOR HIM!!!!!!!!!!

[imperatorrrrr]

💐🌸🌻🌹🌼 helloooo

choose three teams and three fields of law/practices of law. which team is practicing which and why?

hi my love, my beautiful, breathtaking betrothed

okay this is tough.

New Jersey Devils - Family Law because they have the Hugheses and like they're very fond of doing the whole siblings thing like they at one point had Bratter's little brother and Merce's little brother, and we have like Marty's son or something too. so yeah, family law cause they're family, also like New Jersey and like family like in the you know family sense ahahaha I'm going to say family one more time.

Pittsburgh Penguins - Elder Law because theyre old. because no one will shut up about how old they are. did you know they're old? did you know the core trio is so very, very, very old. decrepit. OLD

San Jose Sharks - Personal Injury Law because according to like a "man-games lost to injury" stat the Sharkies had the third most injuries this season in the league (the top two were Vegas - but thats probably Mark Stone LTIR fuckery and Chicago and I don't think about those two teams so I will not be letting them into this ask), so they will be assigned the area of law having to do with injuries so they can sort themselves out.

voila!

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

You should merc assign my dad because he genuinely believes modern intelligent humans are the results of ancient humans and space aliens doing it. And I need to know who that makes you think of first.

Sniper

[friendlyengie]

Do you think Tf2 X Outer Wilds could be anything?

If im going to be completely honest, i have a deep, profound love for outer wilds, but i have a Really hard time doing anything au related for the game just by virtue of the story it tells and the conclusive ending it has. And tf2 could not be more tonally different from outer wilds as a game.

Obligatory “play outer wilds please for the love of god play outer wilds” schpeal uhh you should do it. Super cool open world space exploration game. Sort of like subnautica but minus any resource gathering or building mechanics, very environment and story oriented, but a wide amount of all types of people playing videos games can confirm its a really cool experience even if it didnt seem like a game they’d enjoy. Prepare for a lot of reading and puzzle solving. Also funny non-binary aliens which is awesome.

So, ignoring the wider Narrative Implications, it would still be fun to assign roles to the mercs. So. Cracks my knuckles. Dishing out role under the cut

I think Engineer should be the Hatchling, the main player character, because he seems like the only one who would commit to solving the Mysteries of it all.

Sniper’s very gabbro coded to me, stick him in Giant’s Deep.

Mmmmmm. Medic on Ember Twin in Chert’s place perhaps? Probably the closest one aside from Engineer who would make all the Realizations Chert does during the game.

I think Scout could be a fun Riebeck. Guy who promises hes so not at all afraid of the black hole but also hes just gonna uhhh chill out for a while ok.

Soldier. Soldier Feldspar. You know. Yk.

Maybe Heavy as Esker? Wouldn’t have the same desperation as them, id see him being pretty content (or at least indifferent) to being stationed up there.

Pauling Solanum perhaps. Demo, Pyro, and Spy can be timber hearth residents. Maybe Pyro Hal and Spy Hornfels… Demo Tektite.. checking out the Dark Bramble Seed. Nods.

[seeker-of-truth]

BOLD The Facts

Tagged by @ghostoffuturespast , @tarmac-rat & @elvenbeard! Thank you guys so much 🥹🥰 RULES: BOLD what applies to your OC

Doing this a little differently by making during-game magenta, post-game in blue and things that apply during both will have a gradient

PERSONAL

Verena has lived multiple lives at this point. There's the little girl from the seedier side of Wellsprings, the scrappy prep-school kid. The wannabe rockerboy who moonlights as a diligent college student, a hardened Arasaka agent, a low-cred merc, or the New Queen of the Afterlife. She's done a lot but rarely feels like she's where she's supposed to be.

$ Financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty ✚ Medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non applicable ✪ Class or Caste: upper / middle / working* / unsure / other ✔ Education: qualified / unqualified / studying / other ✖ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes** / yes, for minor crimes** / no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / yes, but charges were dismissed

*I really have no idea what merc work is considered **Nothing has ever come of these because evidence is always circumstantial at best, also who in their right mind would come after her and the Afterlife

FAMILY

Born an only child to a father who was absent in all but body and a judgmental mother, Verena never really felt like family was a place where she could find love.

◒ Children: had a child or children / has no children / wants children ◑ Relationship with Family: close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased ◔ Affiliation: orphaned / abandoned / adopted/ disowned / raised by birth parent* / not applicable 

*she was technically raised by her parents but she was whisked to a fancy boarding school in Charter Hill when she was 7. So after that, she really only saw them when school was off. Her parents stopped talking to her in 2073 after an assignment from Arasaka pushed her close to the point of breaking. They could be dead as far as she knows

TRAITS + TENDENCIES

Every situation in her life has taught her that you should keep your mouth shut until you are sure of you're next action. She knows how to play the game and knows that the best move is often to watch and wait.

♦ extroverted / introverted / in between ♦ disorganized / organized / in between ♦ close minded / open-minded / in between ♦ calm / anxious / in between / depends ♦ disagreeable /agreeable / in between ♦ cautious / reckless / in between ♦ patient / impatient / in between ♦ outspoken / reserved / in between ♦ leader / follower / in between ♦ empathetic / vicious bastard / in between ♦ optimistic / pessimistic / in between♦ traditional / modern / in between ♦ hard-working / lazy / in between ♦ cultured / uncultured / in between / unknown ♦ loyal / disloyal / unknown ♦ faithful / unfaithful / unknown

BELIEFS

She was rased by Catholics and spent her childhood going to the same church as many Valentinos. Despite that all she had a crisis of faith and came to her own conclusions.

★ Faith: monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic ☆ Belief in Ghosts or Spirits: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care  ✮ Belief in an Afterlife: yes / no / don't know / don’t care ✯ Belief in Reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care  ❃ Belief in Aliens: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ✧ Religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious ❀ Philosophical: yes / no

SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION

Slow to trust and extremely guarded - love and romance have always been hard for her. If someone manages to get past that, she loves them hard and fast. Conversely, sex was always easy, a simple distraction for her.

❤ Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual / no label* ❥ Sex: sex repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless ♥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless / romance suspicious ❣ Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious ⚧ Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all ⚧ Potential Romantic Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all

*she never liked one and always found her sexuality to be fluid but always had a preference for romantic relationships with women. In fact, Johnny is the first man she ever wanted anything beyond sex with. If its influenced by the relic or not, she really doesn't want to know.

ABILITIES

Jack of All Trades, Master of None. That really sums her up. She received schooling and training all through her life. She did have some backsliding on her technical skills while the relic was slotted in her head. No time to read the new tech brief. On the other hand, her combat skills became the best they've ever been.

☠ Combat Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor/ none ≡ Literacy Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✍ Artistic Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✂ Technical Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

HABITS

She's got her vices, but when Johnny first asked her to smoke she never thought she'd still be smoking after he was gone. The second she knew both her and the habit were sticking around she marched her ass down to Viks and demanded a set of Syn-Lungs. She drinks, not to get drunk but because she likes the taste. She often gets so busy she forgets to eat so once she realizes she's hungry shes eating any scop she can get her hands on.

☕ Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / alcoholic ☁ Smoking: tried it / trying to quit / quit / never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / chain-smoker ✿ Recreational Drugs: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict (recovering)* ✌ Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed** / frequently** / to excess ☻ Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater $ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes / frequently / shopaholic ♣ Gambling: never / rarely/ sometimes / frequently / compulsive gamble

*leaving Johnny in cyberspace was the incident that broke the camel's back as far as her ability to cope. She starts using while recovering from the assault on the tower, for a while she blames Johnny's addictions for her using but eventually realizes it's always been her. She's clean now and does her best to stay on the wagon but does relapse from time to time. **thanks Relic

Thanks for reading! I took a page out of @elvenbeard's book and decided to write a lil something for each section because I love talking about her so much lol I'm tagging @peaches-n-screem @bishicat @luvwich @medtech-mara

[sunlitmcgee]

For the ask game, could you do 2 11 and 23 for Jex?

2: I don't have a voice claim for Jex YET however I can vaguely describe its voice as being very monotone, neutral, low, but with a gruffness to it that becomes a lot clearer due to the robotic thrill that's mentioned in the official synth lore!

11: Jex is arospec, so the definition of "fallen in love" is! a bit vague with her. I think by nature as a combat merc droid it has never had a real chance to freely explore relationships with other people outside of a purely professional context. However, when Asteria enters the picture, i do think Jex slowly develops a sort of very kid crush-type fixation on her. Not Love, but fond feelings and associations with safety and friendship.

23: Jex's biggest strength is probably how focused it gets on whatever her goal is at the moment. She is very determined and has a very strong work ethic where its tasks and goals are, and this bleeds into her relationships, such as her drive to impress its handlers, or later on, please and get closer to Asteria. However this is directly linked to its big flaw of viewing everything through the lens of a Job. Jex cannot allow itself to relax very easily if Ever. She views life and relationships through the lens of Assignments, Performance, Marks, Deductions, and Grades itself very harshly whether she "succeeds" or "fails" at a given task because of how naturally it feels after centuries of conditioning from her handlers.

[rauhallinen-hauki]

HUNK being an acronym for "human unit never killed" isnt canon nor has been officially stated to even necesarilly be an acronym by Capcom nor any RE games. according to some sources (aka what i could find on the internet) it was originally a mispelling of a similar sounding name that Capcom liked so much it became the character's name. why its written in all caps tho remains a mystery

but that just makes the possible in-universe origin for the name hilarious. like

imagine Umbrella. they call their personnel by either their already cool names/surnames or give them cool codenames. "Vector", "Nighthawk", ect. then they look at their most efficient, deadliest agent: completelly covered in edgy black tactical gear, always cursed to be the sole survivor of a team-assigned mission, only noticeable "social skills being related to work. all around a cold, violent person (to summatize: not who most would consider "attractive")

and then Umbrella goes "daaamn he hot as hell!!!!! HUNK is your codename. not Hunk its HUNK (ALL CAPS) because thats how sexy you are" and Umbrella is an evil shitty organization but choosing a name that fitting is the only good thing they ever did

even funnier is when HUNK later works alone as a merc... and he keeps the codename. like he knows full well how thirsty some people are for him and that he is, in fact, a hunk

[enbyleighlines]

Leigh plays Tellius prt 23

Ugh. Featured above is what I believe to be the most frustrating decision Radiant Dawn made. Astrid had so much potential! She's from a noble family, but left to become a knight so that she could escape an arranged marriage! (Likely inspired by seeing her elder sisters enter into unhappy marriages.) She's timid, but determined to become stronger. She starts out weak, but grows fast, due to her special skill. The fact that she becomes demoted to Makalov's devoted groupie is so disappointing.

I mean, in comparison to her original betrothed, Makalov is a vast improvement. But that's more of a comment on Lekain than Makalov.

And here we have the most baffling decision Radiant Dawn has made. I don't hate it, I'm just... confused. Why did Devdan change his name? Why is he pretending to be a different person? Did he actually lose his memory or is this a bit? Or is it a poorly designed scheme to keep himself out of trouble?

I don't know. I do wish Devdan/Danved had more story importance. He seems like a cool character. I especially liked his base conversation with Ike in PoR. If only we could have had more of that.

Crimean Royal Knight Fifth Platoon Captain Kieran hath returned!!! I am so happy to see this absolute buffoon. He just reads as so fruity to me. I can't wait to pair him with Oscar again. Those two were monsters in my PoR playthrough. And with Oscar's avoid bonus, they were nearly untouchable, too.

Man, this map took me so long. I went into it thinking that it would be easy. After all, most of the enemy units are fairly weak. Surely my units won't have any issue staying alive.

Oh, how wrong I was. The amount of times Marcia got sniped by an crossbow, or Geoffrey got crit by a sniper... I didn't keep count, but trust me, it was a lot. And it didn't help that the enemy and ally turns took so long, so redoing this map was a trial of patience.

At long last, however, I managed to pull through.

This part of the game is so heartbreaking. The fact that Ludveck actually sent Elincia Lucia's hair... like, that's serial killer behavior right there. And while I do think Lucia looks better with short hair, I would have much preferred it if she didn't have it chopped off against her will by the world's most evil Southern gentleman. That's a massive violation of Lucia's bodily autonomy, meant to humiliate and degrade her, and I'm again sad we don't get to murder Ludveck for this.

I've always wondered what all the people gathered here think. Are they predominantly on Elincia's side, or Ludveck's? I hope it's the former. I know Elincia isn't enjoying much popularity from the nobles, but I hope she at least has a devoted following among the common folk.

And how I pray to remove your head from your body, Ludveck. God, he's so creepy. Why are all the male villains in RD so creepy? They all have such terrible incel energy.

THE BOYS ARE BACK IN TOWN

I SAID THE BOYS ARE BACK IN TOWN

Gosh, this isn't my favorite cutscene in the game (that happens in part 3), but man this one is SO HYPE. My own complaint is that Soren is the only one who doesn't seem to have a voice actor assigned to him, aside from maybe Rhys. Even Gatrie does a little grunt at one point. But Soren is a main character! At least hire someone to do some quiet chanting in the old language. They did that for Micaiah in the first cutscene.

Oh, well. I'm too happy to complain any further. I'm just relieved to finally get the Greil Mercs back. Part 3 is probably my favorite part of the game, though part 4 is also a lot of fun. It has some of the best cutscenes in the game imo. I cannot wait to see Ranulf animated. His smooth voice and subtle little ear twitches... ah, I'm in love!

[tricobicoart]

Tf2 Rothena!! Original & redesign!! She became my tf2 si after(under the cut):

I made a whole au where she was on a warp pad & some enemy activated it or destroyed it when she was trying to activate it to help, and she got transported to the tf2 universe (more game and non-story-comics-based one) and gradually gave less shits until she gave up(once she realized there was no way back home) on way more morals than dan vs or tf2 mae, and after busting out of jail one too many times, she accepts a job from the Administrator's corporation for protection of her & some one-sided(on her side)friends, and her fate is cemented there. Also she has the same default scars as tf2 & danvs Mae but i didn't draw them in bc i was focused on getting the new damn 'render' done. Less scars in general tho bc of her unique half-gem-full-human nature, it was easier to incorporate her into the respawn system.

Their team role is officially The Understudy, but she calls herself Cannon Fodder, Expendable, other self-deprecating terms that the team members she didn't gel with went along with(Soldier, Spy, Scout occasionally, Medic bc he thinks it's as funny as she does, same for Sniper) at the beginning. She usually picks or is assigned to(read: the rest of the team draw straws or fight w rock-paper-scissors to determine) one team member throughout the match, assisting them in their job as backup or cannon fodder/actual scouting (its okay bc she respawns & is gets good at not dying eventually). okay discord copy pasting abt her under th ecut

Rothena joins red team starting out being completely herself: adhd, gen z suicide jokes, talking abt how much she loves women, etc, unlike how she usually acts when meeting new people. She figures "it's the 1960s, if i'm gonna get like hate crimed i better do it before i get attached, put all my quirks out in the open" & being so open abt herself actually endears some of the mercs to her (& makes others think she's nuts/has to self-preservation which. true lol) However this makes soldier her worst enemy bc she keeps talking abt how much she hates america. Despite being american rothena: i want free healthcare soldier: you want handouts!? rothena: no, i just don't want to pay 10,000 dollars bc some rando got me sick & i needed to be hospitalized

eventually they settle the fighting with "america could be improved but it's our home & we should stand for it & support it to improvement" but before then, HOO boy they're like in the "can i PLEASE get a waffle" vine: rothena & soldier: *fighting abt america* engineer: can you stand on the point?? rothena & soldier: *get more violent* engineer: can you PLEASE stand on the point?!?

Rothena does godawful at her first day on the field--she's only worked with sitting-duck or inexperienced targets w miss pauling, & the team dismisses her as a liability, so she does her best to stay out of the way bc she thinks so too (and tbh she kind of is, it's like if a casual/beginner jumped into a competitive match in tf2). But heavy takes pity on her and takes her under his wing, having her practice when he has free time he's willing to sacrifice, and having her shadow him during battles!! And the team sees her become more useful and eventually more of them start asking her to shadow them, earning her first positive class-based nickname, (Little) Shadow! Maybe medic sees her potential to learn and observe when she picks up a stray medigun and uses it on him without ever being taught how to!! And from there the trust builds!!

how tf2 rothena started: "blue hair" by tv girl (sad/melancholy) how tf2 rothena is going(canon): "using you" by margo (bittersweet but mostly happy) how tf2 rothena will end up(post-canon): "lifetime achievement award" by lemon demon or smth w similar resurrection themes (driven mad from love and care, unwilling to let go of mortal friends, medic is in on this)