#midnightthoughts

[sarahrepohio]

kind of reflection...

Story: Ao No Flag It's near midnight and I cannot sleep after just finishing this manga. I don't know, I feel like I need to say about what I am feeling right now. I cannot explain how I am feeling about happiness. It feels lonely and it feels just right when I read the ending. I'm scared. Every character been doing their best at the end, it's not perfect but they tried to make their own path, trying to find their happiness, doing their own thing and being happy about it, even if it's not perfect. And it made me scared about my life, I didn't really think about what I wanted. What do I want to do in my life? Right now, I just want to do my best and survive at work, that's not kind of happiness I wanted. I want to make my own path and have someone I could share my feelings with. I want to change, and I need to take a step. I want to change and find my own happiness. I'm 22 and going 23 now, I'm still young, I need to change for myself. I need to start. I can draw my own path like the characters. This book is so good that I want to recommend it to people. Be entertained and learn a lesson from this book.

[dinisuciyanti]

Midnight Thoughts #39

Dibuat dan diposting bukan di malam hari. Tapi tulisan kali ini aku masukan saja ke sesi midnight thoughts.

Tadi ada bertanya padaku:

Prefer kondisi suka sama orang atau netral?

Jawabanku: tergantung skill bersikap dewasa dan prioritas.

Skill bersikap dewasa, bisa juga kontrol diri. Kamu yang tau dirimu sendiri. Sayangi dirimu. Jika memang rasa suka sudah di tahap mengganggu isi kepala, ya sampaikan. Atau, kalau malu, ya cari tau, dia sudah punya calon belum, ada kesempatan atau ga. Karna, rasa suka bisa hilang kalau kita sudah tau pasti “bahwa dia sudah punya orang lain”. Tinggal urusan penerimaan dan ikhlas dari kita nya aja. Walaupun lebih seringnya denial kelamaan. Berujung menyakiti diri sendiri.

Prioritas mu apa saat ini? fokus karir/sekolah? ini dimaksudkan agar fokus mu beralih ke yang “signifikan” berguna dalam hidup. Dapet uang, beasiswa, dll. Fokus menyimpan perasaan bertahun-tahun dapet apa? sakit hati wkwk. 

Kalau kamu gak punya prioritas yang dituju, bingung dengan hidupmu sendiri, rasa suka (yang diem-diem aja) ya cuma nambah masalah hidup. Iya kalau suka sama suka, bisa booster semangat. Kalau cuma diem-diem aja, apa coba? wkwk. 

Kalau dalam posisi netral, gak ada kecenderungan ke siapapun, bisa lebih fokus ke prioritas mu, misal nabung haji, nabung buat beli tiket BTS,dll. Single tanpa kecenderungan mah bebaasss. Hahaha. But, at some point, ada rasa kangen “suka sama orang”, perasaan membuncah pada masanya. Ya wajar, namanya juga human. 

5 Juni 2022

[a-midnight-duel]

Anonymous typing

It's July 31st, 2023

As of late I've been trying to get some of my thoughts down on paper and I've found it so... difficult! It's been so intimidating!

It's like my brain heard my plea to get things done "properly" and automatically started malfunctioning! I've been struggling so much with perfectionism, AKA the grappling fear of FKCNG up. So much so, I've been too scared to even get started.

So this is me, typing at midnight, saying FCK it! I'll vomit my thoughts onto this page and not look back. I'll vent, scream and probably cry a little while typing my confessions in the anonymity (sort of) of the internet.

Whoever you may be, dear reader, you're welcome to join on this strange journey into the wordy unknown.

Wishing you the least number of nightmares as possible, I bid you good night!

Sincerely,

Your anonymous Typist

[poisonhearrrt]

Reflection Correction

I don't believe in the saying, "If things are too good to be true, they probably are." I believe that when there's doubt, it clouds seeing the full picture of lives that are blessed in those moments. Other times when things are truly good, they are ignored instead of being embraced. No time for regrets. Time to realize & reflect.

[seeeayelluhhh]

Of attachments and detachments

I hate myself for being too attached easily. When it is just week of talk, a couple of calls, a week of midnight conversation, a check-in messages, imessages of funny memes and when you see me naked in my truths.

And how I wish I forget easily, too. Just like you.

[beautifullittlefool96]

We could of had it all you and I.

We could of been end game, our happy ending.

We were so good on the good days but I hated the storms that would come on the bad.

We should of been able to fight through and figure it out.

We should of made it. We should have FUCKING made it.

But we got lost. The sunny days turned cloudy. The laughs turned into screams. The kissing and hugging all went away. We went away. The I love yous turned into hate yous and go away. The trace of kisses on my body turned into tears.

Now all we have are pictures, memories captured of the good days. Of the smiles we used to have, of the inside jokes and the love that once bloomed and grew.

We should of kept on watering our love, why did we neglect it. Why did we let it die?

We should of made it….but we didn’t….we went from us to you and I.

I wish I would of known we would end so I could of held you tighter, loved you harder, laughed louder, cherished every touch more.

If our chapter, our book was going to end I wish I would just enjoyed it a bit more, lived in the moment longer.

We were perfect. We burned bright…maybe that was the problem. We burned way to fast.

We should of been end game but we just came to an end.

[undressjess]

So, I’m currently *not* getting eyelash extensions because unfortunately I have less money coming in at the moment (feel free to send random money to my CA so I can start getting them again: $SheLikeDonutz) aaaaaand I dunno if I can even handle life without them. Like, eyelash extensions are a 24/7 glamour. You don’t have to mess with that dumb strip lash glue that mooshes your real lashes together in a big clump a whole damn week after you wear them. And you just feel so much prettier when you have them no matter what the length is. Also going back to regular mascara is kinda fun cause you can wear yellow or lavender colored mascara if you choose but has anyone ever noticed how colored mascara is like never very lengthening? Ugh. Taking lengthening mascara recommendations rn cause I dunno if I can live through this not having extensions during this big dumb huge economic break down. I’ll be super excited to start streaming again on @streamateofficial soon though! I need to check & see if my profile got approved! 🤞 #midnightthoughts #eyelashextensions #lengtheningmascara #wholeoutfitfromshein https://www.instagram.com/p/Cn80Li-OSvQ/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[firetigerwriter]

The addiction was enough for me. Only in short bursts, of course, because the pleasure of addiction wasn't sustainable, and it was ungratifying even when it was. No -- addiction could only be delicious in small bursts of wanting, the ache of desire fermented just long enough to mature into something worth fulfilling. If the desire hadn't matured -- if it hadn't begun the process of breaking down within its host -- then there was no need to pacify it. There needed to be a descension. A breakdown. A helplessness found only in Purgatory. Addiction was only satisfying in the necessity of being saved. . . My writing journal, 1.2.23 . . . #writingjournal #journal #writing #thoughts #addiction #amwriting #writersofIG #writersofinstagram #desire #breakdown #insanity #poetry #prose #poetryandprose #midnightthoughts https://www.instagram.com/p/Cm9TIn9SlrV/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[travelwithmestranger]

Midnight Confessions- Part 1 Storytelling with Prose & Poetry For December Prompts . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . #flawedwithpurpose #prosepoetry #travelwithmestranger #midnightconfessions #midnightthoughts #breakupquotes #breakingup #breakups #breakuppoetry #iloveyoubut #lettinggo #lettinggoquotes #breakupstory #breakupstories #storytimethreads #lovestories #storytime #poetryprompt #writingprompt #prosapoetica #accionpoeticafrases #imissyousomuch #textospoéticos #confessions #deepthoughts #onelinerstoryteller #poetryforlovers #midnight #emotionalstorytelling #imissyouquotes (at Stories of You and Me) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cl4XRtOhwus/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[thedailydiaries]

Now that I'm older, I realized that a mother is behind every smile, success, pain, and failure.  Mom, you are the definition of someone who fights behind closed doors, who is always restless. It was you who first taught me how to love through your actions and affection. Mom, I want you to be happy- I want to make you happy.

The Daily Diaries

[hsescapes]

I just remembered, a simple appreciation really goes a long way. It helped me survive this week. Sometimes you just need to hear it from other people for you to actually believe that you are doing a great job or that you are enough.

Lucky are those who have people who remind them from time to time of how amazing they are. Sana ol indeed. 🙃

[eyeofzeus]

Stop wishing you had what you want and go get what you want.

[dinisuciyanti]

Midnight Thoughts #41

“Value beragama”, kataku.

Aku pernah gagal membawa seseorang yang “ingin” baik agamanya (karna bertemu denganku) ke rumah kala itu. Yang memang, sudah template-nya, berubah karna seseorang itu mustahil, apalagi ketika kamu tidak mendapatkan orang tersebut. 

“Berubah aja dulu. Baru ketemu lagi”, ucapku jika ada yang curhat dengan embel-embel “dia akan berubah ketika bersama”.

Value beragama. Indikatornya? bukan hanya sekedar solat 5 waktu, karna itu basic sekali. Lebih dari itu. Yang tidak mungkin ditemukan hanya sekedar melihat ig stories atau meet-up sekejap 2-3 jam dengan audiens 20-30 orang. Kamu harus mengenalnya lebih dari itu.

Value beragama. Rasanya sudah tidak ingin drama di-sidang satu keluarga karna pemilihan pasangan yang “kurang ini itu”. Sudahi drama, pilih yang cukup baik agamanya dan budi pekertinya. 

2 Juli 2022

[anincompletelstory]

Zindagi ki reet k Utaar Chadav mai.."Waqt" ka maayna kya hai?

"Waqt" - Utaar ka anubhav karata hai, saath he Chadhav ka bhi..

Wahi Waqt kisi ko apna banata hai, aur us he ko anjaan bhi..

Sawaal yeh hai ki, kya yeh brahmand ka sabse amuly "Waqt", wahi anjaan ko wapas apna bana payega ??

[laifoflai]

not okay but it’s okay.

i don’t what to feel right now. tomorrow is christmas but still sad. i just want to spent christmas alone ( i mean, i will not cooperate with my family activities if they have) to have peace of mind. and i dont want to spread my negativity and anger with everyone else. i need space from anyone. i dont want to socialize because im tired of being myself.

i noticed that they okay without me. they are fine i guess. so let’s see what will happen.

[whynooot]

While I sleep,

I dream of you.

And as I wake,

The dreams get tangled in my head...

Flying away,out the window they go as I get out of bed...

But mid-day they come again, as thoughts,as pieces of you that pierce through my mind,and I get lost in them and let them shatter me,as I smile and surrender this beautiful reality - of me being yours, and you being mine.

Never have I been so happy to be myself, and to be real, and alive.