#midsomer shitpost

[wherearemyhatchets]

hello, it’s your local shitposter, Hatchets! I’m back with (shocked pikachu face) another shitpost!

Midsomer Murders should do an episode related to hot peppers 🌶️

John will force Jamie to taste test every species, because it’s John. Fleur will shock everyone by being complete tolerant of spicy stuff, and she’ll down a ghost pepper in front of John to scare the shit out of him. Sarah is there for moral support with the milk.

The murderer will turn out to be some dude who was pressed about his friend-turned-rival stealing the fame for a new species of spicy pepper that he bred.

That is all.

(Btw, can you tell I love spicy food? Lol)

[hecticwinter]

Officially decided I will be posting more on this account again. There won't be as much Midsomer stuff until at least s22 ep5 is out in the UK, but I've got lots of James Bond shitposting to do.

(it won't be regular posting tho as I am a final year student who needs to get his shit together).

[partywithponies]

The Midsomer fan experience, summed up.

[rogerscupboard]

me: watching midsomer murders with my dad

gwilym lee: appears onscreen

my dad: bring home a man like that one day

me: dad i am TRYING

[akimfu]

Based on discord memes.

Source of the pics

[friendofthecrows]

Midsomer Murders Season 14 Episode 6 beekeeping man is my type

[chaos-monkeyy]

Midsomer Murders shitpost, just because I can

(Screenshots thanks to @aplusadult​ 😘)

[gorey]

thanks peter @strangeboyfriend

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tagging @21h10 @dromopoda @merobot @hater

[kratosaurioned]

get to know me meme

whatever i’m bored, feel free to do it if you wanna

name: rethi nickname: rethi is also a nickname gender: it’s a mystery height: 5′6 ??? ish?? ethnicity: white british favorite fictional character: i can’t answer that favourite fruits: apples, raspberries favourite season: autumn? spring? favourite book series: discworld favourite flower: roses, the darker red the better favourite scent: cinnamon, vanilla, roses... the smell of a cat’s head. anything baking favourite colour: purple-grey? grey-purple? favourite animal: it’s a cat coffee/tea/cocoa: tea..... cat or dog person: i like both but i guess more cat than dog number of blankets: one dream trip: round the world tour to see all my friends star sign: capricorn  time: 4pm birthday: 18/01 favourite bands: queen i guess favorite solo artists: uh. vienna teng the song stuck in my head: she’ll be coming round the mountain last movie i watched: road to el dorado last show i watched: midsomer murders when did i create my blog: god only knows what do i post: shitposts last thing i googled: a chinese restaurant to see if it had closed down or not. it had :c do you have any other blogs: only one i use is @rethirising do you get asks: not very often, usually only when i ask for prompts or like. spam. why did you choose your url: i’ve been kratosaurioned following: like 70?? followers: too many for me to think about average hours of sleep: 6-8 but i’m still tired lucky number: shrug emoji instruments: used to play recorder + drums but i can’t read music anymore what am i wearing: big skirt, link face triforce shirt dream job: writer favorite food: chocolate nationality: english favorite song right now: i was born for this from journey

[wherearemyhatchets]

whenever I see an orchid while shopping, I immediately think of Orchis Fatalis. then I snicker under my breath at the thought of Scott being shook about the cost of rare plants, and how people were murdered for the sake of a little yellow orchid ☠️

[wherearemyhatchets]

there are times when I wonder, could we ever have the occurrence of Ben and Jamie working together as DCI and DS in Midsomer (i.e. Ben comes in to take John’s spot)??

Also I would find it really funny if that actually happened, and with the idea of Ben still being a single pringle alongside Jamie 😂, then things might get really interesting lmaoooooo

[wherearemyhatchets]

so, because my midsomer murders sergeant oc is a dude who’s totally used to eating spicy stuff…

…how would you rank the actual 5 midsomer sergeants when it comes to spice tolerance? And give a rationale (I don’t care how ridiculous it is, I’ll literally take any explanation)

— don’t be afraid to give an interpretation for the non-sergeant characters either, I’m kinda just curious to see how people would see each character when it comes to tolerating spicy food lmao

— also if they ever made a midsomer murders episode about people getting murdered over hot peppers, I’m gonna lose my marbles 😂

[wherearemyhatchets]

Out of inspiration from being smothered with organic chemistry stuff this week (midterm…woohoo…), I wrote a small thing about the midsomer sergeants and how they would fare in the course that I’m doing right now…

~~~~~

If the midsomer sergeants were students in an organic chemistry university course:

Gavin is just that person who just can’t ever understand it, and no amount of practice or studying will earn him more than a bare pass. Poor dude can’t distinguish an aldehyde from a carboxylic acid. (To be very honest, I’m practically Gavin a lot of the time when it comes to chemistry)

Dan is that student who literally doesn’t do practice problem sets ever (if he does, it’s always with the top students because that’s where you go if you want to climb to the top tbh), and somehow gets above the class’s average just by skimming his notes for three minutes a day…

Ben is that person who’s average to above-average at o-chem; he does his work as recommended by the prof because he actually needs to do it in order to avoid falling behind, but his refusal to attend office hours is the only setback preventing him from being at his best.

Charlie…this man is literally a star at nomenclature and reaction mechanisms, and everyone will approach him at some point to ask for help because they’re all too scared to approach TAs/profs for help. He’s also the type to just practice every single day. Responsible boi

Jamie is one of the ones who are above average too, but probably comes way too close to physically damaging himself for the sake of a good mark. Practice problem sets all night long before exams, even when he’s been doing them regularly throughout the term.

~~~~~

…aaaand time to go back to my exam reviewing :’)

[wherearemyhatchets]

I’m gonna probably reveal my midsomer murders oc at the end of the week :)

And I have some stories typed up about him too ^^

(Ngl, kinda nervous cuz it’s the first time I’ve written fanfiction in years and it was for a completely different fandom in the past 0_0)

[rogerscupboard]

gwilym lee: exists

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