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#might delete later cause i don’t really like it tbh
harshugs · 1 year
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is that what you’re into?🍑
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chibishortdeath · 2 months
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Great googley moogley it’s all going to shit! Every day becomes exponentially more terrifying!
And all perfectly timed to just right at the start of what’s supposed to be my adult life where I get my shit together and be useful and productive!
#we’re cooked#we’re doomed#idk the end is nigh or whatever god damn#I just wanna be able to live in my own house and draw a guy sometimes without the ever present threat of the horrors is that too much#apparently yeah cause houses aren’t achievable anymore but man#m a n#especially if you didn’t/couldn’t go to college and aren’t capable of working most jobs#doesn’t help there’s the chance some part of my existence might be suddenly illegal or extremely dangerous yippie!#the options are literally 1. people die 2. people die what the hell do you even do man#how the fuck is this the election I’m gonna get forced to be a part of we’re living in hell#and nobody around me believes it’ll get bad yay great oh so wonderful#I can’t wait to lose rights and cause millions of deaths regardless of who gets chosen#I think one of these days I’m literally just gonna die of stress#it’ll either be a stroke or a heart attack or cancer or uh well ya know#we’re fucked#we’re screwed#I wanna have some kind of an actually visible break down but ive suppressed everything so much that I don’t outwardly emote much anymore :)#and the constantly dissociating thing too I guess#if you ever think ‘oh yeah I can just think of guy in a situation that’s so cool’ don’t it’s a trap—#although tbh this would be significantly worse without it so uh law of equivalent exchange I guess#fuck fuck fuck anyway#not putting this in the main tags#definitely deleting this later#if anyone in my house got any hints that I may or may not have different opinions than them well uh I’m financially dependent on them so um#literally wouldn’t have anywhere to go if anything happened#oh we’re really in it now Simon#hell world#there’s like what 7 genocides going on too I hate everything I hate everything I hate everything#I can’t do anything to help anyone either cause I don’t have a job and I could get kicked out or treated badly at home for it#not that anyone thinks very highly of me at home anyway I am kinda family disappointment number 2 I pretty sure
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campbyler · 6 months
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mmm what the fuck?
how am i supposed to live like a normal functioning person after experiencing the full range of human and Inhuman emotions?
thea i love u i promise but i also want to kill u in the most cruel way possible.
i was trying to read 32k words one hour before the work and failed Miserably 😭 i only get through driving lesson part. can u believe i had to do actual work the entire day instead of reading my gay fanfiction? 💔heartbreaking misogynistic And homophobic if u ask me.
anyway. i know im going to forget something. it always happens and then im too shy to send other asks so let hope it doesn’t happen this time.
driving lesson.
don’t worry about ur manual transmission description. i’ve changed three instructors in the span of year and a half and all three of them told me different things. i didn’t notice any Big Serious issues that would be at odds with driving mechanic.
to the other news. will sucks 😭😭 not his fault Obviously. he’s naturally anxious and tbh mike didn’t give him any hints about how to feel when the car is ready to go. not mikes fault too. i bet he doesn’t even think about this little thing anymore (and cause u don’t know about them either. which is ok don’t worry about it. u probably just need to experience it ti fully understand). i was so happy when will finally manage to get the car going 😭😭 i probably called him baby too.
and then i literally passed out when i saw the mike called Him baby?? first will’s brain in denial made me questioning was it really for him or for the car. cause mike Loves that car i wouldn’t be surprised if he really call it baby from time to time. but then i remembered that we know how mike feels thanks god and i became like 85% sure that it was for will. (i also Run to check playlist right after this line. yeah i found “king of my heart” there. u make the impossible possible cause why am i listening to two of my least favorite reputation songs and genuinely enjoy them?)
i mentally add the keychains to the list of things we need to know more about. but i think it’s cute that they both not only save them but also use them almost daily. and they both choose car keys to hang the keychains on. dare i say soulmates.
*two weeks later*
also i think it’s funny they consider each other hot while driving.
and of course mike is obsessed with old expensive cars!!
are the malls in the us exactly dying? my office building is near the mall and i can guarantee u that in my country they r super alive.
ok i might be wrong but i think that the deleted scene is from bookstore part idk.
i think it’s cute that they trust each other enough to allow to choose as significant item as journals concerning that they really picky about them.
and i loved that mike blushed over a simple kiss 🫶🏻🫶🏻
(i feel like i want to catch up on everything and it’s killing me cause i write down one thing and immediately remember the other 😭)
THEY WERE SO BOYFRIENDS IN DINER!!! i don’t think i will ever recover from how cute they r and how much they actually like each other (and how single i am. as the classic said “when someone will prey on my neurodivergency….” and so on and so forth). i love that everyone can see it and im obsessed that boys don’t even want to deny it. i think a lot about the fact that mike said that they middle school sweethearts like he regrets about the missed opportunities (but also he doesn’t regret cause the thing they have now (at this exact moment. cause i still have bad feeling) is like that Because of years of semi-friendship and rivalry and unsaid confessions).
and i think even more about the fact that mike didn’t want to talk about his pretentious ivy league college. squinting so hard and taking a lot of notes (in fact writing paragraphs of analysis to my friends who has no idea what acswy).
the photobooth scene!!! omg i can’t believe u almost deleted it all??? suni is our hero! lots of hugs and kisses and thanks to them!!
i can’t believe mike talked about showing pictures to their friends in one minute and literally kissing will on them in the other. i love them they r so silly and in love and can’t get enough of each other. u can feel how close they become and that the air is thick with the newfound (and rediscovered) feelings. and they can’t live without touching and the hold hands constantly!!! all day long!!! and it’s not enough!!! and oh. i think it wasn’t the last time we saw pictures (squinting even harder).
the way max immediately cut the bullshit and asked about swearshirt. i need to know what lucas wrote to mike.
he likes him!!!
i love the difference between mikes “i know i like him but i won’t do anything about it” and wills “i need to kiss him to death right now!”
and the kiss on the backseat of mikes stupid mustang!! we were all waiting for it!
i think i reread and memorized the last part and in still shaking whenever i think about “nervous” part. mike makes will nervous!! and he makes him shake and do stupid stuff like kissing and blushing and thinking to add heart next to his name and call him his boyfriend!!! omg!!
“I’ve got you, baby” WHO WILL GET ME??? im the one who is going insane??? it’s so tender. my boys 💔💔💔
(the second time. my eyes r hurting from squinting that much. and i feel like we’ll have “el’s not stupid” kind of scene in the flashbacks)
this character hits so hard!! i’ve never doubted any of u but i can see why this one is one of ur favorite thea!
thank u so much for ur hard work. if i could draw i would to the whole ass animation of this chapter (and any other too).
love u. thank u for reading all this rambling
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mmm what the fuck is RIGHT alya bc this is how i feel every time i read one of ur lovely essay comments. bc whaqt the fuck. why do u want me to CRY ALL THE TIME. (i guess it's fair considering we are making u cry with the fic itself but still . Rude)
you are so real for trying to read 32k in one hour and also so me . rly fucked up and cruel that you would have to work (even tho u threatened to murder me)...i hope you are freed from these perils Soon. don't ever be too shy to send more asks tho every ask from you is a BLESSING and a TREAT!!! EVEN WHENTHEY ARE LACED W THREATS!!!!!!!!!!!! and also tysm for validating my manual driving lesson description bc fr every video i watched was different and i was so stressed but it's FINE. ALYA SIGNED OFF ON IT SO NO ONE ELSE MATTERS!!!!!!!!!!!!! DEAL W IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! will Does suck and that's one thing we can all agree on 💗💗💗 i was going to include a bit about likee what the engine Sounds like bc i know it sounds different when you're ready to switch gears but honest tbhly the driving scene alone is like 12k and i was super losing steam by the time i thought of it so i didn't <3 he is def a baby and mike def refers to his car as baby so he is right to be confused. but it WAS for him!! we actually aren't 100% sure of mike's feelings Yet (ch08 is meant to be the precipice of a realization, not an actual one) but obviously . we do have a pretty good idea of how he does feel. teehee. also i am glad you are enjoying komh now bc wtf......how is it one of your least faves................i support you but i am also judging u a little alya .
i think keychains will be included in one of the companions :o) also OBVIOUSLY they find each other hot while driving. they're both annoying and down bad 🙄🙄
malls here are super dying!! i think the only ones that aren't are ones in Major Cities (there's two nearby me that are pretty popular, but the other ones are mostly closed, and it's definitely been a phenomenon in the us over the last few years thanks to online shopping)!! the deleted scene is actually from the driving scene, but the bookstore scene Feels shorter bc i was truly at the point where i had nothing left to give when writing it (it was the last part of ch09 to be written), so it definitely suffered from that. if we ever do Huge post-mortem edits once acswy is over, i might go back and add to it, or write a deleted-scene-type companion, but tht's the tea w the bookstore scene <3
the diner scene was SOOOO fun to write and it had me blushing frfr. i answered this in another ask but the middle school sweethearts comment was Definitely the most insane thing that i thought of for this chapter and to me it was for sure the nail in the coffin for will of like damn. ok. he's Serious abt this. bc i think with their #history that will has trouble admitting even to himself that he likes mike, and so he'd need to feel pretty certain of how mike feels first, and after processing the middle school sweethearts comment later in the car that's what made him realize like oh damn. i Do like him. SO MUCH. and we all nodded and patted his back and said yeah baby we know. but what you described mike thinking is absolutely exactly how he feels 💗 very reminiscent and wistful, even.
LOL LITERALLY THIS HAS BEEN A UNANIMOUS COMMENT ACROSS THE BOARD OF "THANK GOD FOR SUNI" (INCLUDING MYSELF). to Explain the way i was feeling about it -- i did not initially mean to have that be a Spicy make out moment! it was supposed to read more along the lines of the thrift store scene, or even the kiss after will finished driving the mustang, so very sweet and soft and Romantic. it just didn't come out that way once i was actually writing it, and so i was nervous that i was toeing the line too heavily, or tht it was out of place with the rest of the vibe i had constructed for the chapter. a combination of suni (and abby, who got early access and acted as our second beta) being adamant that it Did fit and worked well, and me being too pressed for time/not having enough energy to rewrite that saved it from the deleted scene graveyard <3 thank god fr. they are both so fucking stupid.
the entiiiiire realization scene up from will realizing he likes mike to the very end of the chapter is my favorite thing that i have ever written i think 💗 i am just so happy with the way it turned out, especially with it being at the point in the fic that it's at!! it felt rly right for will :') also mike calling him baby!!! that was such a last minute decision but i'm so glad i went for it!! the original line was "i've got you, yeah?" but baby hit So much harder so shout out to editing thea for making that change 🤸 will wants to add a heart next to mike's name in his phone SOOOO BAD!!! WHEN WILL HE GET TO!!!!!!!!!!!
your second ask SO TRUE SO REAL. TEEHEE AND MWAHA AND SO ON AND SO FORTH. also you're so right jonathan is so fucked up for stealing steve from will like that 🙄
tytyty as always for your novel length comment alya 💗 really and genuinely and truthfully the thought of getting to read ur reactions is one of the most exciting parts of uploading a chapter!! i eagerly await all of ur other reactions <3333
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frindoka · 10 months
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my art timeline :-)
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hi! i’m making this because i was inspired by maxpawb’s post i saw on toyhouse , which then led me to look at all my own art that is still somehow intact in my storage. this only details stuff from when i started posting online, not from when i started drawing traditionally as a wee lad. partially because my sketchbooks are lost and partially because i never really wrote down dates on my art to begin with.
a lot of dates are lost, due to the aforementioned problem of me not writing things down.. and also i have awful dissociative memory problems so there’s way too many gaps in my life. but i really did want to do this to see how much i could find & how much i could recollect.
content warning for VERY brief mentions of grooming, as well as minor mentions of real shitty friends
everything is under the cut! there might be another rb if or when i hit the image limit. curse you, tumblr.
date: ??? , i had to be around like. 11 at the time
this was when i joined warriors amino and i deleted my account because i got in trouble for having social media, LMAO. i eventually came back with a new one though. this is probably one of the only surviving art pieces from when i was THIS YOUNG, everything’s on an ipad that’s so broken it won’t even charge
i learned how to use the smudge tool on ibispaint at this time and thought i was the coolest bitch on the block for my blending
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may 2019, i was like 12
my return to amino (and brief period on deviantart, which i never used again lmao) i was specifically on wings of fire amino + warriors amino. i was obsessed with airbrush shading.
this is one of my first fursonas which was a wings of fire fanflight called kitsunewings or smth. and also my first species character (he predated the dragon), a bayfox, which was drawn in krita. i never used krita again after this. coincidentally, i was also never active in bayfoxes after submitting him.
i crawled back to ibispaint no matter how many new free programs i tried.. (also tried firealpaca once. i couldn’t even figure out how to draw a line…)
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may 2019, 12
the rise of my longest lasting fursona. she got stolen on a shitty app called anime maker once. i can’t remember if she’s older than the dragon, andromeda, but her older iterations definitelt are. this character was just the FIRST first fursona that i actually called that, since i didn’t even really know what a furry was at first
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june 2019, 12
my first commission that i sold for like 30 deviantart points (i only used the site for commission purposes, as mentioned before i never really used it lmao)
also i tried to make a closed species on wings of fire amino. second image. it was terribly stressful ; this was around the time i met my longest lasting group of friends (hi freak bin! 5 years <3) and.. some of the worst people i’ve ever met in my life at the same time, LMAOOO
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also here’s this kokichi ouma dog i made before i even knew what danganronpa was. i would find out much later, unfortunately
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march 2020, still 12 (cause of my august birthday 😒)
there’s a really big gap in my files here. sad! my art kicks into gear at this point tbh, i like how i did the lines. wish i had the energy for such clean lineart still :-(
i think around this time i lost contact with the people who were my groomers (which i would realize later) and i’m thankful that i don’t even remember what their names are.
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april 2020 - july 2020, 12
okay these aren’t awful actually. HOW WAS MY ART SO DETAILED. i admire baby frets power, jesus christ
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i also did a design raffle when i hit 500 amino followers which is still the most i’ve ever gotten as a following. pretty crazy, i wonder who owns this dude now, i still think they’re cute
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august 2020, 13
wow i’m 13 now look at that. i had to go digging for this one, only one i could find that was remotely close to my birthday (it’s the 25th!) this was a drawing for my friend bea lol
was still friends with some pretty shitty people from wings of fire amino, and it was really taking a toll on me. i don’t remember drawing as often as i used to during that time because of all of that.
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december 2020, 13
i wish i could still draw backgrounds.. i need more practice
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january 2021, 13
okay honestly these are really cute. i don’t know wtf kind of motivation i had for this much detail. the shading is pretty damn good
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april 2021, 13
still going strong with the shading and backgrounds. not much to say around this time either lol. the first one is an older design of mine, but they’re pretty damn cute.. i wonder what happens to the desgins i lose track of? but ik this guy has a toyhouse profile i just refuse to look through my like. 200 pages of character designs on there…
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july 2021, 13
PUDDLE! PUDDLE OH HOW I MISS YOU. my original favorite oc, i got so much art of him & drew him so much he reached 100 pieces in less than a month. i also met my best friend through this dude.
my art got.. blocky? here? idk what i was doing with all of that but it lasts for a while. lol
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october 2021, 14
one year older and i got neo twewy for my birthday and it changed my life permanently. in several ways. anyhow, here’s frindoka furries.. they live in my files forever and will never b drawn again because they got redesigned several more times LOLLLLL
this is the month after i broke off permanently from my shitty old friends, with support of some other friends of mine. thank you guys… i did proceed to get harassed and made paranoid over my text messages by the shitty friends cause they were mad i got one of them banned from a furry adopts server for being literally dangerous. i do know it was them bc it was admitted to & they were some of the only people i gave my phone number to. i was kind of dumb for that
i was happy after my birthday because 13 was one of the worst years of my life. literal constant spirals and breakdowns because this is when i realize i was, in fact, groomed. i’m well and handling it better now.
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january 2022, 14
my first d&d character, the mark of my eventual spiral into heath insanity… shadow how i miss you. i ended up redesigning them later on
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march 2022, 14
i got into a pokemon arpg around this time and it took over my life for MONTHSSSS. kind of a shitty community in it though, but i appreciate how it improved my artwork. i’m back at the backgrounds! it’s shut down indefinitely now. rip eeveemporium
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april 2022, 14
I FOT BACK INTO WAKFUUUU😭😭😭 also got pretty comfortable in my identity as a transgender nonbinary person, but i would get MORE comfortable about my identity later on :-)
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this is going to be continued in a reblog because i did, in fact, hit the image limit. oopsie daisies
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Some (Unorganized) Musings On A Year In the Unoverse
With Worlds 2023 over, it has been officially a year, more or less, of me having become a fan of Shoma, as I started following him at Worlds 2022 (so not exact year but I figured Worlds is easier to track than exact dates, sue me), so I felt like sharing some unasked for thoughts.
So this whole mess started with the Olympics, when figure skating was trending just about every day on tumblr. “But Wolf,” you might say, “Didn’t you say you became a fan of Shoma at Worlds?” Well, yes, cause see, it wasn’t Shoma that caught my attention, it was Yuzu. I saw gifs of him and people stressing over him showing up and found it mesmerizing, so I decided to follow along with his short. 
Well, we all know what happened at the short. The cursed hole.
Anyway, I watched a few of his other performances, mainly Notte Stellata and Hope & Legacy at Worlds 2017 and Ballade No. 1 at the 2018 Olys. And during all this, the doping scandal was going on and I got to watch, real time (I would look at live updates on the figure skating subreddit) as all that drama unfolded and got to witness the nonsense that was the IOC and ISU. Well, that soured me some, I feel, that plus the Olys being in Beijing and not having the energy to watch it all for one skater meant I didn’t watch the free, alas. I tried watching the gala, but that was my first real experience with how garbage skating coverage is in the US, but I did get to see Haru Yo Koi. It was beautiful.
And, by all indications, that was going to be it.
But wait, isn’t this supposed to be about Shoma? We’re getting to that, be patient! Why are you reading this anyway, I’m not important. This is just me rambling. Unorganized rambling where I’m getting the order of things and the exact circumstances confused...
Anyway, fast forward to Worlds a month later. I didn’t really care, tbh, I was still watching the subreddit, I think. And thing is, Yuzu wasn’t quite clicking with me. He is an amazing skater, but something wasn’t clicking with me that clicked with other people. I still liked him, and I loved watching his performances, very moving, but something was... missing for me. And as he would retire after Worlds, I may very well have left my brief look into figure skating at that.
Unfortunately, I saw this other Japanese skater wearing this gorgeous red costume do happy hops after completing his short at Worlds and I went, “oh I love him.”
AND I WAS DOOMED, I TELL YOU, DOOMED.
That was Shoma after finishing his short at Worlds. I don’t know if I saw it on twitter (twitter, that site I hadn’t logged into for over a year at that point and would wind up deleting once ownership changed, but I could still browse) or reddit or here, but I saw it and I loved it. Something about that grabbed me. I watched him do his free, I watched that glorious step sequence at the end and him claim his first World medal. I was hooked. My attention had been grabbed.
Why did Shoma catch my attention when Yuzu hadn’t, when I didn’t even watch Shoma’s performances at the Olys? I don’t know. Maybe it was cause Yuzu would wind up retiring after Worlds. Maybe it was something about the triumphant nature of Bolero at Worlds. Maybe it was the costumes. Maybe it was *sigh* the atmosphere of Yuzu’s fanbase was... not something I particularly liked. Maybe it was Shoma’s story of him going through a tough coachless year and him finding Stephane and how it all culminated, ultimately, in that first Worlds medal. Maybe it was cause, while Yuzu seemed like a spirit of the ice given human form to grace us with his beautiful skating, Shoma seemed like Just A Guy who went out there and Did His Best (and turned out his best was damn good), and I found him more relatable, ultimately, as I learned more about him as a person who loves sleeping and eating meat and hates vegetables. Mood.
Maybe I’m just gay and thought Shoma was more attractive than Yuzu. Maybe this all happened cause I’m very shallow.
Regardless, I became part of the Unoverse. I wound up keeping up with a lot of relevant twitter accounts even though I could only observe, wishing all of them were on tumblr. I followed several Unoverse tumblrs here (special shoutouts to @myjunkisyuzuruhanyu and @vilyae for all the info and pictures and such), I read the figure skating subreddit. I watched the fans deal with... an annoying amount of hate from others for reasons that infuriated and befuddled me. I learned way too much about the season schedules.
I watched Turandot at the 2018 Olys. I watched his triumphant DOMO at JNats 2019 (god, those twizzles. And that utter happiness during the step sequence). I watched La Vie En Rose at MoI 2019 (that skate is so beautiful and gentle...). I would slowly watch all of his programs at least once over the year and fall that cantilever every single time...
I watched his videos on his own YT channel where he could not do English, even as I myself didn’t understand a word he said. I watched Unowan and him constantly being attacked by puppies. I saved way too many pictures to my phone (as of this writing, 2434 photos).
I watched as the fans waited for him to announce his programs for the season. I watched the first performances of Gravity and Aria in shows. I then... got to experience the joys of watching figure skating in the United States without a VPN or Peacock. I wound up watching Aria from Skate Canada on NBC’s “highlights” broadcast, but for every other performance of the GP (INCLUDING THE GPF, WHY WASN’T THE GPF PROPERLY TAPED FOR A BROADCAST ACROSS ALL DISCIPLINES) I had to stick to embed videos on twitter, ultimately, besides maybe a few here and there on youtube (for whatever reason, it seems to me his programs this season are really hard to find on YT versus every other program he has, it’s annoying). I got to see him finally win the GPF. I got to finally watch a good performance of Padam, Padam from JNats on YT (before it got taken down).
And then I got to witness the emotional roller coaster that was this Worlds as he struggled with injury and I prayed he wouldn’t injure himself further and hopefully take the victory and defend his World Champion status.
And he did. I didn’t watch it live cause time zones, but I watched Aria on NBC’s highlights and saw it. It was a good thing to wake up to. The utter joy and finding out he’s the first Japanese man to win consecutive golds in Worlds.
And now here we are. There’s still WTT, but I still wanted to write this, now. Then the season will be over and we’ll be in the offseason, waiting for shows (including him and Yuzu skating together at SoI!), waiting for new program announcements. For it all to start again. There was a small article about him winning Worlds in my local paper today, and I was so happy. I hope to keep it.
I am... still not all that invested in figure skating as a whole, ultimately. If he retired tomorrow (he’s not retiring, for the record), I would peace out then and there. Even without the... Everything regarding the ISU and such (please don’t let Russia back in...), watching this sport in the US is... hard, and I don’t have investment in other skaters to make an effort, for better or worse. That’s not a slight on them, I just have other things in my life.
Still, I’ll be here until he does retire, and I hope that he’ll skate as long as he’s happy and healthy doing it. And maybe he’ll make it to the 2026 Olys and finally get that gold.
Ganbatte Shoma!
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seiwas · 11 months
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SAW YOUR POST ON THE COMFORT DRABBLE AND SO I SHALL CATER MY IWA THOUGHT OF THE DAY!! (also idk if like something happened or what but you don’t show up in search as like an option and it kinda freaked me out cause i thought you deleted your blog and i was like but my iwa thought T-T sorry that probably came off so mean nahdjnsns I HOPE YOURE DOING WELL and eating lots of yummy food and drinking plenty of water!! and no, tea and coffee don’t count!)
wow that got really long BUT ANYWAY uhhh iwa thought of the day, comfort vers.:
watching a movie/show with iwa and you’re snuggled against his chest, his hand finds that spot in your hair, scratching softly, as the other holds you close to him. his warmth radiating off his body and all is well
and then you get that wave of sadness, or something just feels off, and at first he doesn’t notice (he got too into the plot, can you blame him 😭😭) but when he laughs and makes a comment and you only half-heartedly reply, sirens are blaring in his head
“what’s wrong, baby?” he’s asking you, kissing your temple and holding you closer and when you shrug, trying to play it off, he doesn’t let you and so now you just have his full attention. bodies facing each other now, he pulls you in to a proper hug, his hand gliding down your spine and rubbing gentle circles on the small of your back, and he doesn’t say anything for a while, mainly focused on wanting you to feel better, but also knowing that you’d tell him when you’re ready and he’s more than willing to wait
and when you tell him, he listens, still rubbing circles, still turning his head to kiss your cheek or forehead or whatever is in reach, and he listens until you finish talking and he simply nods, he understands, he’ll call that person who did you wrong a bitch and he’ll curse your mean manager with you and he’ll help you study better for your next midterm. but for now, he’s offering his presence and for now that is more than enough :3
(and he won’t let you go until you give him a sweet kiss and that dazzling smile of yours that he knows he can never get tired of seeing)
but as always, bolder and surer iwa lives in my head and the rent he pays are him strolling around in the hallways either shirtless with loose sweats or that black muscle shirt he loves so much
oh koi you are so sweet 🥺 thank you for dropping by w comfort iwa 🥺 i appreciate u so much! (and yeah tumblr has been super glitchy for me since yesterday 😭 dk if that’s why i won’t appear on search but dw! i am here!! drinking lots of water hehe)
☹️ oh iwa is so sweet i am sniffling ☹️ he’d give the best hugs he would!!! always warm, and big, and weighted, and substantial 🥺 and the back rubbing too oh 🥺 koi 🥺🥺🥺 he rlly would be the type to listen and wait until you’re done (then try to do smth abt it later on, maybe even without you knowing, just so you can finally rest) 🥺🥺🥺 i need him neeeooooww ☹️
ANKSNDEIJDKEJD AND THE BOLDER IWA HELP 😭😭😭 tbh seeing him might fix everything too 😭😭😭😭 all thoughts gone just iwaizumi hajime in a black compression shirt shaking his protein bottle… forearms flexing… gODDDDD
thank u so much koi this rlly helped me feel better! u r so sweet and thoughtful 🥺
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incorrect-web-novels · 11 months
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The Cult Leader in the Clergy Academy
Okay, so I did read the first 20 chapters of The Cult Leader in the Clergy Academy. My thoughts are below the cut. I, uh, did not mean to ramble this much.
(CW: spoilers for the first 20 chapters, death, imprisonment, white washing, religion, SA mention, kidnapping mention)
First of all, I did originally read into this novel because the title was so incredibly similar to “The Demon Prince Goes to the Academy,” so I do want to compare them. They do have similar vibes, but I did like how Do Sun-woo, the main character, is actually 17 and not a transmigrator (as far as we’re aware). He is infiltrating Florence Academy to become a prelate with access to the secret prison that houses his mother, which is a very different goal than Reinhardt, who is trying to prevent the Gate Incident and survive. I think the infiltration is more interesting since it’s a direct action that Do Sun-woo wants to take, but it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense yet as to why he doesn’t even try a different method? Like, he knows the prison area is highly guarded, but it’s somehow easier to spend years trying to become a prelate???
He’s also just pretty flat. He’s not… bad… or anything, just has a weird line about “not knowing how to talk to girls, but his father taught him psychology, so he’s fine” and is pretty bland so far. He’s likable in the sense that he’s a good person, but I’m not really that hooked on his character yet. 
The pacing, so far, is really strange tbh. It’s only 20 chapters, but everything is weirdly jarring. Like, the first chapter has him attending an opening ceremony that morphs(?) into a lecture about the Holy War that killed his father and imprisoned his mother (which is revealed later). After that, he goes to an underground chapel where he takes a microphone and is immediately met with cheering from presumably waiting Voodooists??? Who were just waiting for him to get back from school ig??? 
Also, it very much felt like he was ~secretly an idol~ instead of the leader of the Voodooists in the first chapter, which was just a weird tone overall. In chapter 20, Do Sun-woo is accused of bulling and causing a dangerous incident to portray himself as a savior, which, correct me if this is something regional that happens in schools, but at this point, he’s a student who gained an award for a shared military win? I don’t think anyone really cares about him at this point? Like, if he was an idol, it might make sense, but? Who cares??? It was just a weird addition imo, but anonymous communities & confessions does seem to be a thing that happens in other Korean novels; it just felt weird in this situation imo
It was even stranger since the whole novel seems to be set in a modern setting for absolutely no reason. Like, it would almost be easier to make it pre-technology so far. There’s no real application of modern technology except the weapon developer corporation, and it’s kind of like, “here’s this large amount of land we’re practicing killing monsters to gather mana stones and defending our carts. A lack of communication is a major plot point of this exercise. The next day, I’ll text my besties on my cellphone :) what do you mean we could be using technology for other things????” 
Also, Do Sun-woo TAKES OFF HIS MASK IN AN ELEVATOR WITH CAMERAS. HE JUST TRUSTS THAT A RANDOM CEO WHO TRIED TO KILL THEM MAYBE AN HOUR AGO WILL DELETE THE CCTV FOOTAGE AND NOT LOOK AT IT AT ALL. AFTER HE TALKS TO HIM ABOUT HIS SON THE CEO’S SON HE GOES TO SCHOOL WITH. He even USES the credit card the CEO gave him RIGHT AFTER the CEO’s son calls and TELLS HIM WHAT HE WAS TRYING TO BUY. Like, I understand the CEO is very grateful, but how. How has he not been captured immediately??? 
Other than all that, however, the setting seems to basically involve Roman Catholicism (or possibly another branch of Christianity or Judaism, but they ARE called “Romanicans,” so…) and Haitian Vodou. The MC can channel the lwa/loa, such as Legba, Bossou, and Baron Samedi, which are spirits from Haitian Vodou. This is seen as “heresy” and “demonic” by the “Romanicans” who have Seven Heavenly Virtues - “humility, charity, kindness, patience, chastity, temperance, and diligence.” 
Which, in my unprofessional and uneducated opinion, it is a brave and very questionable move to have the “Cult Leader” of a religion based on an African diaspora religion be named Do Sun-woo. I don’t remember any comments about his actual appearance, but there is never any mention of the in-book Voodooists having a different appearance or origin (and, like, I’m fairly sure he’s Korean like everyone else). To be fair, it’s also somewhat weird that (fantasy) Roman Catholicism is the official religion of Korea, but, uh, someone more knowledgeable should be having this conversation tbh. 
Anyway, I do think it was a good idea to make a major point about how Voodooism is not weird and “other,” but it does come across that they just shifted the idea of an “evil religion” to Satanists:
Chapter 4:
"The Voodooist doctrine shared many similarities with the Romanicans. Both valued love and respect and sought to understand what it meant to be good. Obviously, both religions frowned upon crimes like kidnapping." 
Chapter 10:
...the Satanists worshipped Satan and opposed Adonai. They were the main reason why the world was infested with demons and monsters….Their purpose was simple: bring Satan forth to this earth, use him to destroy the planet, and rule the broken world as kings…. Satanists strove to bring forth ultimate and empirical evil. They performed acts of plundering, murdering, and raping others on the regular and believed that their actions were "benevolent.
Which… feels weird, but I do think Koo-Jun Hyuk - one of Do Sun-woo’s new friends - is possibly a Satanist or has another important secret. If not, this potential foreshadowing is SO wasted:
Chapter 9:
"I would find him next to me sometimes, then gone, and then back at my side again. Maybe it was because of this, but it felt like Koo-Jun Hyuk was always next to me and far away from me at the same time."
Anyway, my final score is “weird but not a sin” overall with an asterisk on the (likely) white-washing. I genuinely would’ve continued reading the translation if there were more chapters up for free, and I may still do the “1 chapter every 24 hours” thing. It wasn’t bad, per se, and I am pretty interested in the plot - I wasn’t expecting to have this many complaints when I started typing this out lol. DPA is still better imo tho
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ootahime · 3 years
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what is utahime’s role in the future? — a prediction (manga spoilers)
part 1 (unedited)
I WAS ABOUT TO POST IT BUT I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED IT AND I WAS SO HURT FR!!!!! I HAD REWRITE THIS ENTIRE THING </33
part 2 is here!
in this post, i will be analyzing the information we’ve been given about utahime so far to form a prediction about her future role in the jujutsu kaisen series. if you’re as interested in utahime’s character as i am, please feel free to keep reading :3 (i’ll also be talking about her relationship with gojo a bit too)
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soukatsu_ on twt!
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kaikaikitan on twt!
utahime iori is a semi-grade 1 sorcerer working as a student supervisor/teacher at kyoto jujutsu high school. she loves drinking beer and going to karaoke. she’s also close friends with shoko and she’s not particularly fond of gojo most of the time. what else do we know about her?
hates sweets (funny she’s the complete opposite of gojo)
she’s great at singing and it’s a huge part of her technique
squabbling with gojo became a reflex :3
everyone absolutely adores utahime
loves watching soccer and baseball
a terrible drunk (worse than naobito zenin)
gojo is her main source of stress
let’s dive into her personality and abilities!
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chapter 65
before i get into it, i think it’d be best if i were to explain the timeline because a lot of people seem to be confused about this one particular thing. utahime is born on february 18th, 1987. contrary to popular belief, she is not 3 years older than gojo. it is november 2018 in the story because gojo was sealed on halloween. if gojo was born on december 7th, 1989, that would mean that right now, he is only 28 years old. he has yet to turn 29.
the year is 2007. gojo satoru is a second year at tokyo jujutsu high school. the japanese school year begins in april which suggests that gojo is only 17 at the time (even if it’s not april, it doesn’t look like winter yet so it’s unlikely that he’s already 18). utahime is 20 because it is past february. she is a 2nd grade sorcerer at the age of 20. that’s not bad at all!
chapter 65 introduces young utahime and mei on a mission together within a cursed site. in real time, they’ve been gone for two days which is a cause of concern for gojo, shoko, and geto because the two haven’t contacted anyone since the beginning of their mission.  the two begin to suspect something is wrong because the hallway markers they’ve set in place disappeared, and no matter how far they travel within the halls, the end is nowhere in sight.  mei theorizes that the cursed spirit is overlapping the space as they travel forward.  utahime agrees with this speculation and proposes a plan to escape the cursed spirit’s grasp by moving erratically.  notice how she says that if one of them should escape, they can try to attack from the outside or call for help.  if utahime was not capable of inflicting damage on anything then she would have told mei to escape and attack if she can while she waited to be rescued.  however, she didn’t.  she included herself in the sentence which leads me to believe that she is capable of going on the offense if needed.  
keep in mind that at this point in time, mei is a grade 1 sorcerer.  she is knowledgeable about all things involving jujutsu because she is experienced and skillful.  we can see this aspect of her character illustrated when she theorizes that the cursed spirit is messing with the space they’re in.  she chooses to go with utahime’s plan because she agrees that it’s the best action moving forward.  this verifies that utahime is an intelligent girl that’s able to get along with pretty much anyone.  
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her intellect is demonstrated once again in chapter 79.  she was able to deduce the possibility of there being more than one traitor and the fact that one is probably a higher up.  she also narrowed down the mechamaru as the mole of kyoto not because he was acting suspicious but by process of elimination.  she thought thoroughly of his technique and how easy it would be for him to manipulate devices small enough to be undetectable.  
sure you can argue that she should already know all her students’ abilities and whatnot but you have to admit that it’s hard trying to sniff out the traitor when no one is acting suspicious.  in addition to that, how did she know that there was a traitor in the top brass?  i would have never guessed that tbh LOL (maybe bc im an idiot).
okay, now that we have established that she’s intelligent, let’s answer a more important question.  is utahime weak?
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chapter 33
if gojo calls utahime weak, does that mean there is some truth to it?  well it is true that she is weaker than him because he’s the strongest and all.  in my opinion, he’s just teasing her.  he probably found that calling her weak is what really riles her up.  maybe i’ll talk about why he loves teasing her so much in a later post.  but anyway, gojo calls everybody and their mom weak.  he even said jogo was weak and we know how powerful that guy is.  gojo’s words alone do not indicate much about utahime’s power.  in fact, i don’t even think he has seen her use her technique yet.  he’s probably only ever heard of how it works.  this is what i think their conversation about her technique was like:
gojo: hm?  ur cursed technique is singing?  can u show me?
utahime: what!  no way!  
gojo: why not?
*one of the classmates tells him that she can only use her CT once in a while because it consumes a lot of energy*
gojo: hahaha!  u have to conserve cursed energy to use ur CT?  why are u so weak, utahime?
utahime: i!  am!  your!  senpai!  respect!  me!
what i’m trying to say is that gojo loves poking fun of people.  we should not believe him when he calls someone weak because compared to him, everyone is weak.  
this is a little off topic but let’s examine him telling her, “and you don’t have the nerves, utahime.”  i think he’s trying to say that there’s no way she’ll ever do something like that because she’s not the type to put her students in danger.  remember the soft expression and relieved smile on her lips when she said that she was glad the students were safe after the kyoto incident?  gojo was directly in front of her so not only did he hear her say that, but he could have seen the look on her face too.  even if he told her that she didn’t have the guts to betray the school to get on her nerves, he knew that utahime simply cared too much about the students so he ruled her out as a suspect right away.  this is why he ultimately decided to confide in her and ask her to help him.  
i’m a person who loves over-analyzing things.  i really enjoy the dynamic between gojo and utahime.  they’ve known each other for more than 11 years and although they always bicker, there is an unspoken feeling of trust between the two.  gojo can do anything and everything by himself because he is truly the strongest person alive, but he still knows when to rely on others.  him deciding to entrust utahime with such a job implies that he believes in utahime’s abilities.
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chapter 52
she’s not using any cursed energy here--not to our knowledge at least.  this is just pure skill.  she was able to swiftly evade the swing from haruta.  he was surprised himself considering the fact that he was right behind her.  how do we know her CT isn’t speed?  after haruta swung at her, we can see that some of her hair got cut off.  if she was using her CT then speed should be her specialty.  she should have been able to completely avoid the attack altogether but she didn’t.  of course this isn’t a wow moment because jujutsu sorcerers should know how to dodge attacks, however, i’m just trying to get the point across that she’s not a defenseless person without her technique or others.  let’s not forget that semi-grade 1 isn’t a weak rank either.  you can’t simply be recommended to be a grade 1 sorcerer if you only can support others.  
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chapter 48
i want to bring up this panel. it suggests that utahime and takuma are sorcerers who have not experienced black flash and therefore, do not understand the essence of cursed energy as well as those who have like gojo and nanami.  i find it strange how takuma and utahime were used to represent sorcerers who haven’t experienced it yet.  is the purpose to demonstrate that there is a clear difference in skill between adult sorcerers like utahime and takuma compared to gojo and nanami?  i could be nitpicking but the order of todo’s statement doesn’t line up with the sorcerers being shown.  let me explain in depth.  todo starts off by saying, “for those who have experienced black flash as compared to those who have not...” wouldn’t it make more sense to show gojo and nanami on the right side to represent sorcerers who have experienced black flash?  that was mentioned first, after all.  gojo and nanami should appear when todo says “for those who have experience black flash” while utahime and takuma should be shown right after to personify the second part, “as compared to those who have not.”  i’m just making it more complicated than it actually is LOLOL i’m sure it really just means they haven’t experienced black flash yet, which is completely fine.  i also find it fascinating how they used utahime to contrast gojo.  with nanami and takuma it makes sense.  nanami is someone takuma looks up to, he wants to gain nanami’s approval before he deems himself worthy of a promotion. what about utahime and gojo?  what’s the purpose of comparing those two together when it’s obvious that gojo knows more about the essence of cursed energy more than anyone else?  i might be delusional whoops
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let me know what you guys think?  this is only a part 1 so i haven’t gotten around to answering the question.  i’m pretty much done with the second part, i just need to revise it a little.  i think after i post part 2, i’ll try to interpret all the gojo and utahime moments in the manga >.<
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my-pink-yandere · 4 years
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❤Obsession❤
Prompt: Yandere Bakugou, Midoriya, and Todoroki (separately) has a crush on Y/N...who is actually obsessed over a fictional character.
C/N: Character Name
Warnings: Yandere Tendencies, Swearing, Also this is sorta long cause I wrote a lot ;-; 
💥Katsuki Bakugou💥
❥ This boy is angered when he finds out about this
❥ Like wow he’s super pissed
❥ If you’re unfortunate enough to ever have a Yandere Bakugou take a liking to you, when he realizes that you’re obsessing over someone who isn't him, a fictional character nonetheless, he’s... well...
❥ “Very upset” would be an understatement
❥ He sees that as basically losing to a person who doesn’t even exist
❥ The chaos begins when he’s in the middle of his daily routine of admiring staring at you from afar, and when you stand up with one of your friends and begin walking out of the cafeteria, he hears a few... interesting statements escape your mouth as you pass him by
❥ “I can’t believe you actually like them, Y/N! You’re totally hopeless when it comes to love, huh?” His head was tilted your way, seeing your friend looking disappointed and you looking flustered. “It’s not my fault they're so perfect!” you answered, practically radiating embarrassment. He smirked, assuming you were talking about him. I mean, who else would you get so worked u about>
❥ “Besides, I’m not the only one who simps for C/N! So shh-”
❥ ...
❥ All that’s going through Bakugou’s head right now is why that name wasn't his
❥ He’s gone eerily still, and all of his friends sort of stop and look at him
❥ “Bakubro? You good-”
❥ Bakusquad is going to have to hold Katsuki back from blowing up the entire cafeteria
❥ This b*tch only sees red rn
❥ ‘WHO’S THE PERSON YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT AND WHERE CAN I FIND THEM SO I CAN BREAK THEIR F*CKING KNEECAPS’
❥ he got murder on his mind :0
❥ Despite how angered Bakugou is, he’s not a complete dumbass, believe it or not
❥ He’s not going to confront you about it, at least not right now.
❥ Once he calms tf down, he’ll come to his senses and have his top priority being to get rid the competition first, meaning he has to hunt down whoever C/N is and delete them from existence
❥ When he learns that C/N is actually a fictional character from some anime tbh he just feels extra insulted
❥ You chose a f*cking fictional character over him >:(
❥ It’s now where he begins to get even angrier when he realizes how easy it should’ve been for him to notice sooner. All the stickers on your school supplies, the pins on your bags, how you’d sometimes sneak in their merchandise to show off to your friends at lunch
❥ It was when he overheard you possibly owning a body pillow where he went feral
❥ Will go out of his way to steal your shit and burn all of your merchandise of C/N, or anything that would remind you of the character
❥ He’d catch you when you were alone, and would shove you off your feet as he’d grab your bag and roughly go through it, angrily tearing off the stickers on your notebooks and pins off your bag as your crying and screaming at him to stop
❥ At this point he doesn’t care about how you feel about this at all. It’s never even crossed his mind (blind rage)
❥ His plan is to pluck C/N out of your life, replacing all your thoughts of them with just him, so you’re only thinking of him
❥ It doesn't matter to him if they're good thoughts or bad thoughts
❥ All that matters is that you’re thinking of him
❥ Only him.
In a nutshell, he’s gonna steal all of your items that have any reference to C/N and get rid of it all. He doesn't care how much he’s hurting you by doing this, he’ll concern himself with your feelings later. He’s going to hang around you more despite your protests for him to just leave you alone, quite literally forcing his way into your life so that he infests himself into your brain and become the only thing you think about, so that you can truly understand how he feels about you.
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💚Izuku Midoriya💚
❥ Bold of you to assume he doesn't already know about this “obsession” of yours
❥ This child takes notes on EVERYTHING and ANYTHING related to you, so he obviously knew about your love for this certain fictional character
❥ At first glance, he believes your obsession with C/N is similar to him with All Might- just an innocent but deep admiration for them
❥ He’ll buy you their merchandise and gift it to you at school (accompanied by some flowers and sweet little cards of course ❤)
❥ He was nervous to do this at first, his crush on you rendering him a stuttering, blushing mess whenever you so much as glanced his way, but he pushed through his anxiety just to see your cute smile and feel your warm hug when he gives you those gifts
❥ He cherishes those moments more than anything, to see you so happy
❥ (Especially because  it was him to make you so excited! Not Kirishima or Uraraka... him)
❥ He’ll binge the entire show as fast as he can and memorize everything he deems as important just so he can chat with you about it at school
❥ “Isn’t C/N so cool?” he asked you, and you had quickly turned to him with a surprised and then starry gaze. “Izuku, you like them too?!”
❥ You were both on a first name basis now ;D (You even gave him a little nickname: ‘Zuku. Let’s just say he was a bit more than ecstatic when you began referring to him in such an informal way. You must really like him! ❤)
❥ And Midoriya, being the delusional little yandere he is, sees this as you both basically dating
❥ You both hang out everyday at school, discussing the show and characters, who your favorites were, how the plot was going, etc.
❥ You see him as one of your closest friends now, and eventually you trust him enough to bring him to your house to chill without your family home ;0
❥ The thing was, Midoriya noticed how you would never invite anyone from school to your house, always brushing it off and just saying how your parents would get angry or how dirty your room was
❥ This was the first time you’d ever invited anyone from U.A. over to your house
❥ His thoughts were running wild as you both walked home together: ‘What’s Y/N’s house like? Will their parents be home? Why have they avoided anyone coming over until now? Have they only invited me because we’re dating? Are... are we going to kiss?????’
❥ (For clarification, even with the dorms in place, over the weekend you like to hang out at home where you’re more comfortable)
❥ “We can re-watch some of the episodes for awhile. I think I also have some snacks...” you grinned, and he memorized every detail of your house as you both made your way to your room
❥ He was greeted with a room filled entirely with C/N merchandise, but caught his attention the quickest was your bed
❥ You had a body pillow of C/N
❥ Now Midoriya, like I said before, is a very delusional yandere
❥ He has excuses for literally everything you do. You love him just as much as he loves you after all!
❥ But this
❥ This he cannot ignore
❥ He was just staring at the pillow with a blank face as his eye twitched
❥ “’Zuku? What's wrong?”
❥ “Hmm?” he hummed, turning towards you. “Oh, nothing! It’s just, um, your pillow...”
❥ You felt your face catch on fire as you moved to block his view as you tried to quickly shove it under your bed. “UHM, HAHA SORRY ‘BOUT THAT I FORGOT IT WAS THERE-”
❥ Midoriya was quiet as he watched you struggle at hiding the pillow
❥ He was thinking
❥ He loved All Might a lot, but he’d never buy a body pillow of him
❥ What type of love did you have for C/N?
❥ “Hey Y/N?” You turned to look at him, but the moment your eyes met you felt a shiver run down your back. Izuku was smiling at you, but his whole vibe was different...
❥ ‘Was he angry?’
❥ “Why don’t we watch a different series today?”
In a nutshell, he’d go along with your character obsession up until you cross the line, and that would be either him finding out about you reading fan fiction of C/N, a body pillow of them, or some... questionable fan art you have of them saved on your phone. Then he’d do anything in his power to distance you from that show, hiding your merchandise and distracting you with more hero-related hobbies, like geeking over pro heroes or training. Just please stop simping over C/N. You’re making the smol boi jealous of a fictional character :( Why can’t you just pay attention to him a bit more?
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❄️Shoto Todoroki🔥
❥ Tbh he doesn't really acknowledge your love for this certain character for awhile
❥ All he focuses on is that you look really happy and cute when you talk about this show
❥ That’s all that really matters to him 😊
❥ Similar to Izuku, he’ll buy you all of their merchandise just to see you all adorable and excited
❥ And Todoroki is a rich boi so that’s a plus
❥ Will probably buy u all the expensive merchandise and you’ll just be 🥺️💞💞💞
❥ The only reason he never really gets angry is because he doesn't understand what's so terrible about your little obsession with the show/character
❥ He just sees it as a little hobby of yours that you’re really passionate about
❥ Despite his cold demeanor, Shoto is always trying his best to support anything you do
❥ While he can get very intense as a yandere, we gotta remember this is Shoto we’re talking about
❥ He probably has no clue what simping even is
❥ He only gets bothered when you own a body pillow or compliment C/N looks too much (he doesn’t appreciate you getting so worked up over someone who isn’t him... even though you both aren’t technically dating)
❥ But he wont flip out like Midoriya or Bakugou
❥ If you both are on the couch at the dorms and you're just going on and on about C/N he’d prob just like-
❥ Reach over and grab your hand and just state how cute you are
❥ He’s a bit of an idiot when it comes to flirting, but he notices that whenever he touches you in an affectionate way you sort of freeze up and forget what you're talking about for a few seconds
❥ Because of how supportive Shoto’s been you sorta developed feelings as well 
❥ Cause I mean who wouldn't ;)
❥ He becomes your close supportive weeb friend :D (even if he doesn’t completely understand what a weeb is...) 
❥ But Todoroki doesn't like that title that much
❥ But he’ll take it slow because he loves you and wants you to love him back :)
❥ “I like it when you smile like that, Y/N.”
In a nutshell, Yandere Todoroki is prob the calmest of the three. He doesn't understand how simping works and the idea of you passionately loving a fictional character more than him has never crossed his mind. But he uses your love of the show to get closer to you. Closer and closer and closer-
Until maybe he can just be the one to make you smile, and not just that character from the show :)
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jess-the-vampire · 3 years
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honestly i’m not even sure i should be talking about it, i guess i just feel better to mention it then bottle it up to people who might be wondering
personal stuff under the cut
i’ve had some people recently try to send me moringmark comics, or link me to posts that he’s made and so on and so forth and  it’s cool and i appreciate it cause i love when people send me to new works and stuff.....i just wish i was able to really respond to them like i can with others.
mark blocked me guys, at least here on tumblr (Everywhere else i’m fine for some reason), i can’t view any posts of his and haven’t for awhile.
While we were friends a few years ago, but things have changed since i was helping him with his star vs comics.
back a few years ago when mark’s tumblr got randomly deleted, i was trying to contact him to make sure he was ok and nothing happened and all that and....ever since then he’s never spoken to me.
He kinda...ghosted me, and he has since then.
this was our last exchange:
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I never got a reason why, one day we were talking fine and the next he was well....not speaking to me. I didn’t want to spam him so i would try again every few days, then weeks, then months....just with conversation starters....nothing accusatory, i just wanted to check up on him and everything.
I tried contacting him on other Sms and everything but i never got a response, and for awhile i thought maybe he was busy and i was kinda sorta bothering him so i gave him space and tried again months later.....and yeah, he never said anything.
i tried sending him apologies if i said something wrong, i tried asking if he wanted to talk and see what was happening, i was willing to accept if maybe i had said something hurtful and he no longer wanted to be in contact with me.
Because maybe i did at one point and if i did i wanted to own up to it to him because i liked being his friend and wanted to keep being his friend.
but as far as i can tell we had nothing but polite conversation with each other.
And after awhile it started to feel, at least to me, like he was purposefully shoving me to the side and ignoring me. First he stopped following me, then he had a whole comic about the art programs he was using which felt awkward to me because i was actually the person who introduced him to medibang 
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not that i needed to be credited for it, obviously, i guess it just felt weird at the time when he mentioned how much he loved it and then just never mentioned i had been the one to introduce him to it. It only came off as weird as it did because i was being ghosted, i probably wouldn't have cared at all if we had been still in contact.
it kinda makes looking at any comics i ever do get to see of his surreal, because i think to an extent “i helped make this.”
I guess it hurts more now looking back, because now i just kinda feel.....used.
Because i never was told why i was being ghosted i’ve been just kinda left to speculate what i did, and sometimes when you’re left thinking like that your mind makes you wonder if he was never my friend in the first place.
or if i felt differently about the friendship then he did.
i helped with ideas for his star vs comics for awhile, got him into a new art program, then all of a sudden he just.....pretended i didn’t exist....it’s...y’know, sad and makes you think.
And it’s upsetting too because i had a very positive experience working with mark briefly, talking about the show and ideas for projects, when this happened i was heartbroken.
Also he never really finished that specific comic so i don’t know if i should be credited for the help exactly, i don’t know if he ever got to most of my ideas.
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at most i helped him find artists and their ocs for him to draw and that was the biggest contribution i had that i can at least recall.
Point being tho, it felt hurtful to me, because of course it feels hurtful to feel like you made a friend and helped them and then they pretend you never existed.
But even after this had been happening for a few years i still was giving him the benefit of the doubt because i still wanted to think i was misinterpreting the situation and maybe i still am....
but when i found out he blocked me now as well, i gotta admit, i lost faith on that.....
i only mention all of this at all, because i used to say i really respected mark like a lot, as a creator in the star vs fandom, and that’s still not entirely gone either....but i have to admit....i’ve soured on him....a lot since this happened.
i don’t want anyone going after him or anything (Though i doubt he’d listen to it anyway he’s got so much on his blog it’d drown in the notes, but still, don’t), i just wanted to address why you’ve never seen his content on my blog despite us being friends awhile ago, why i barely talk about him, why i may sometimes get uncomfortable when he’s brought up.
it’s been pretty upsetting tbh, because friends turning on me is something i’m uncomfortably used to happening and it gives me serious anxiety about me being a bad friend or hurting ppl because i’ve had so much bad experience with friendships with rather toxic ppl.
honestly if mark showed up today in my dms and said something to me and why he did all this i’d probably forgive him if he had a reason and i was just being silly or something. But because of how limited the information is for me, i’m sadly left to think of the worst and there’s not much here making it any better.
he’s a very creative guy and he does deserve his following.
but as is, i just wanted to address that our relationship as friends has changed a lot since i talked about it last and why things may seem off these days so people can get a better grasp on what happened.
i feel it’s better i address it then not address it.
the guy doesn’t owe me anything, i just felt personally betrayed as a friend that i at least wasn’t given an explanation for him cutting our relationship how he did.
it is how it is tho, he may never contact me again, especially now that i know he blocked me, and it does make me sad tbh. I did like being his friend and i wish we were still friends, but this seems to be out of my control, he pushed me away and blocked me for whatever reason and i’ve just had to deal with it.
i’ve been trying to move on from it, i have not attempted to contact him in over a year at this point, but it’s hard to avoid thinking of it when he’s as popular as he is.
but i hope this helps give you all an understanding on things and why we don’t seem to be as close as we used to.
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jjheejz · 3 years
Note
Just here to say thank you for explaining in length on zzh's issue. Really appreciate it. It is painful and it is hard. At times it feels like I'm grieving. Thank you again and keep safe.
This is an ongoing update about the case from start to development. List of all related posts can be found on this blog's pinned post (link provided at bottom of each post as well).
Also an update as of 22.8.21.
Update: Updated an advice to all. Added an important NOT, added J's side (keep supporting him)
Hi anon,
You're welcome! ❤️
If it helps to make you feel better, the latest update in the Entertainment Industry (from all the sources I have) is that the Official Authorities have started to look into the the issue already, specifically towards Internet Water Army(IWA) and the bodies behind them.
Background
For newcomers of this blog (if any), please browse content page here for context.
Because of the nature of his case, especially the overnight deletion, it caused a lot of people (general public) to look into this issue. Many of whom also express the same general sentiment (that his shrine case was definitely not a light one, but it does not warrant such an outcome). Some people also got to learn about the cultural (the shrines), political aspects and the industry + IWA.
However, as the internet is flooded with IWA, their influence may still skew passerby opinions, therefore, those more easily influenced/doesn't know the whole landscape public might have their own other conclusion (a factor of concern for the govt). Though, generally the logical audiences wouldn't even bother engaging with those posts in the first place, it became more like an Be Educated thing than a criticising thing.
Cause
The Officials started to step in partly because of the timely political clash of dates, this created a concern among the Officials. They literally kind of attracted the Government's attention themselves.
So shoutout to those who have asked before if the Government will do something about it, the answer is yes, they are in the midst of doing it (so sorry again to the anon whom I blanked out and deleted the ask about it too).
Still, I'm just sacarstically laughing at the whole situation. What we thought was an end was actually just another beginning, caused by those people themselves, they targeted someone, and yet it got ricocheted back at them (after being around for 10 over years).
Other impacts
Another change this case brought about, is that the Entertainment Industry landscape is getting a huge change eg. checking their celebrity's background so that the staff can better prepare to deflect any allegations etc.
What it means for him
Despite knowing this is good news, am still unsure what this entails for him. We can still wait. But knowing that even though he is not in front of the camera now, the impact of his issue is still currently generally positive, it's a funny kind of joy. His fate really is something (for those who have read my fate series about JZ).
Regarding silence 🛌
Lastly, I've been wanting to raise this but didn't know how/where to insert/didn't quite understand fully at first, the reason for being silent is that the purpose of those behind IWA (or similar terms etc) is probably (i stress again as this was a guess from the source) that there is a wave of people who wants to find out the political sentiment from the public and govt - and they are possibly NOT even govt bodies doing this kind of checks in the first place. So now they are trying to use JZ fans as a shield to avoid the authorities from coming to them (through J as well) - a line of thought.
That's why don't click into any videos/posts/trends (eg. Bilibili, twitter, weibo, zhihu etc) because they can all be collected as data.
Same advice as usual, ignore. WOH is still up on Youku, J is still working, work/studies & life is still a part of your life.
Stay silent, and live life to the fullest. 🌻
Hope this helped brightened your day a bit :)
Other details
Link here
---
Was thinking really hard if i should do a dedicated post on this, but tbh I got paranoid at some point on the IWA on Tumblr issue LOL (because of certain active login records in my account - but later kind of realised that I had a bunch of dead side blogs havent touched for years - I only use my main and this was created for JZ, so bots and buying of followers probably used my account to access my dead blogs or something, about 8 or 9 overseas login LOL to follow nonsense accounts, immediately logged them all out and did all my 2FA what not, do your 2FA guise!).
Was in between wanting to share more so more people know, while at the same time got paranoid over the tags LOL and pondering how silent should I be.
So thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts, it bridged a platform for my own questions. :) Hope it made you and everyone else at least a bit more hopeful to wait 💛
Answered on 22.8.21
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daisyfics · 3 years
Note
Hey can I request nagito and hajime with a s/o that is like monika so they can control reality and stuff
Hey, sure! Great idea!!
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🟪Nagito + Hajime x reader who controls reality
Pairings: Nagito x reader, Hajime x reader
A/n: read tag rules before reading! Thanks!
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Nagito:
•Sometime during the killing game he would find out
•Nobody knows how but he did (idk how either)
•So he would come up to you and just bluntly be like “I heard you can control our reality.”
•Freaks you out tbh
•But nah, later on he would ask you a ton of things about your “powers”
•“Wait, so you can control the future then…?” “Can you alter my reality?” “We would be so powerful together, don’t you think? Wait, it that even something you can do?”
•He might ask you to demonstrate what you can do. He would be proud of you when you change the ending so he doesn’t die (pshphspsh)
•Sometimes he would ask if you could just kill Monokuma, but knowing everything about the nwp then you’d probably say no
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Hajime:
•He’s a basic boy so he would be like “Wow, really? Cool.”
•Tbh he wouldn’t really care at first
•He would only then care if you decide to rid of something like Chiaki’s video game (oops)
•Then, like Nagito, he would be a bit more curious and ask questions. But more serious ones like “Does it hurt to use that ability you have? What ultimate would you have been if we knew about it? Are there others with this same ability? If so, how many? Can you just delete people like that?”
•He would feel bad for bombarding you with all these questions so he would just leave you alone for a while until coming back up to you
•Might ask Mikan about it, since she’s a nurse he wants to know if it’s anything genetic or caused by some sort of trauma
•Might be a bit confused if you subtly break the forth wall
•Like, this is how the conversation would go
•You: “haha, yeah. The players are probably waiting for a new death, amirite? Hahaha *smiles at the player like they do in The Office*”
•Hajime: “… *confusedly looking where you are*”
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scandeniall · 4 years
Text
dating suna be like
pairing: suna x reader
a/n: random dating suna drabbles because i <3 him. this was intitially gonna be some plot but it turned into entirely too many suna thoughts so- (more under cut) might do a part 2 idk
Dating Suna fun. Like all y’all do is chill and vibe but it’s never boring. The relationship is literally like dating the bestie. He probably calls you the homie to his friends. He will and does turn linking with them down to hang out with you (he genuinely enjoys spending time with you m—as u should when you’re dating someone lol). Half the time y’all just be chilling in each other’s presence mind your own business. Just sitting on the couch and he probably has he legs draped over your lap and whenever either of you see something funny you can just wordlessly hand your phone over to the other. I feel like you two would develop a similar sense of humor just by dating so he lets out a little low chuckle and smirk and just shakes his head handing your phone back.
If he’s gaming and has you over he always has one ear off so he can hear you talking to him. He mutes the mic when he chimes in. He doesn’t need the boys clowning if he slips up and says something cute
He’s the type of bf that’s like “excuse me” (mentally cause he not finna really day it) and loves you out the way with his hand on your waist/lower back. If he wants attention he damn near grinds against you (like you really ain’t have to do all that to get past lmfao). If you look at him like 🤨 he’s all “yeah my bad 😹”
Teases you like “you know your Megan but do you have Megan knees” (he saw that tik tok and spoiler—you don’t have them Megan knees. Fight him ❤️) Just mention how he’s done 5 strokes in and it’s all good. These roast sessions are funny and they happen a lot. Y’all have done the “it’s the for me” (without recording) it before. Or y’all do it a lot but it’s all love.
“ Yo (Y/N)” “What do you want?” “If you were a bug I’d step on you ❤️”
Hates driving so he makes you do it. You become his chauffeur. Whenever it’s “alright so who’s gonna drive,” he’s going to get your keys for you like a gentleman. He controls the aux though. He’ll sprinkle some songs you like in between his playlist bc he cares and likes seeing that little smile when your song comes on and you just vibing. He always has the seat reclined back pretty far (even when he is driving)
When y’all occasionally go out to parties he kinda just has his arm casually around your shoulder other hand holding a drink. If he’s still sober that’s as far as it go tbh. Y’all not really into the kissing PDA. But he will lean to whisper in your ear if he gotta tell you something. Will also do it to /badly/ rap some rap verse to you that’s playing. “Please don’t quit volleyball to become a rapper”You gotta get a few drinks in him to get him to dance fr. But if you throw it back he knows how to catch it just know that. Somewhere deep in the crevice of Atsumu’s phone there’s a video of you and Suna straight drunk, getting a lil touchy while dancing. (Bonus: y’all practice it in the bathroom mirror sometimes. Get a hype song playing and y’all both in a good mood and just feel oddly hype— yeah. Has the phone in one hand, other on your hip.)
Hes has a soundcloud and once made a song that was so bad that you forever clown him. You don’t let him live it down. He deleted that shit so fast. You straight hurt his feelings. “Babe come listen to this”
“LMFAO what is this garbage”
It gets awkwardly silent and you realize it’s him. You laugh so hard tears form. You can barely breathe as you ask if that’s really him.
Suna: nothing but pain
You tell him don’t he ever do that again in his life.
He looks good in anything he wears really. Does have a signature of either gray or black sweats though. Wears a tight black tee. Anyways at some point y’all get thin matching gold chains. His has a super tiny pendant. It’s the first letter of your name. When I say it’s a small letter, it’s small. Like you’d only see it if you were standing pretty close to him and purposely looking for it. He keeps it tucked under his shirt most of the time but sometimes it do dangle in your face and it’s like “damn I bagged him 🥰”. Your chain has a R on it is it’s bigger than his (but don’t worry not like obnoxiously big)
When you sleep you sleep with your backs to each other. Whenever he has to get up super early for practice he does wake you up to say bye (like it’s not 6am 😐). He wakes you up right when he’s up so his voice is all deep and sleepy as he just presses a kiss on the back of your shoulder before mumbling “Got practice. I’ll be back later” in your ear. This doesn’t happen all the time but sometimes when he’s hit with how good you are and how lucky he is he’d follow it up by softly gripping your jaw to place a soft and sleepy kiss on your lips. Those days are followed with soft “love yous” instead of the usual “see you later”
Whenever either of you has to travel or go away for an extended period of time y’all always end with “be safe”. It’s not the delirious morning “I love you” but still means the world. If you’re going together the two of you show up to airports in black hoodies and sweats. He always has his hood up and if it has strings he’ll pull them. Ifs it’s early he sleeps on your shoulder. Yes it starts to hurt and fall asleep but he’s cute when he’s not talking so ❤️
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Text
Thoughts on, Invader Zim Quarterly: Holiday Special
WEEEE WISH YOU A MERRY JINGLY WE WISH YOU A MERRY JINGLY!
Ahhhhh It’s out! I’m so excited!
But I always get excited when it has my man Membrane and my man Eric Trueheart involved with the comics. 
Also santa..   Tbh, I was excited and nervous about this quarterly. 
Excited because it has Membrane santa backstory...
But I was nervous because that it means they might bring back the santa-blob monster from the Holiday special on the TV... and The Christmas special is one of my least favorite IZ episodes...   I mean... I rewatch it occasionally, and it’s fun, but I’m just kinda used to IZ having more BITE in it’s satire if you know what I mean? The Christmas Special in the IZ universe doesn’t really say anything about the capitalism of Christmas... it’s not like IZ hasn’t made fun of capitalism before. (that’s the whole show)  The Christmas Special in the show just kinda fell flat of my expectations of what an Invader Zim episode should be....
The only thing I respect the Holiday Special for, is that it goes down the “Santa isn’t real” route in a kid’s show and sticks to it. (there’s no “real santa” that shows up and “solves everything”) All of the “Santa’s Helpers” confused the Santa mythos with the Christianity Jesus mythos. (”waiting one day for his return”) Which makes sense, since IZ is like dystopian future Suburbia Hell. I just kinda like that there’s no “real santa” that interfered to “fix everything” and that Zim himself ended up CREATING Santa when he didn’t exist previously. Like I find that kinda cool...
Other then that, I just kinda wanted something else from the Hoilday special then what I got. (It taking priority over scrapped episodes like “the trail” and “Ten minutes to doom” and “mopiness of doom” does not help it’s case in being one of my C-tier episodes...) 
So maybe this quarterly will fill the void of what I wanted out of a Holiday special? Well, let’s see. 
SPOILERS FOR THE QUARTERLY BELOW THE CUT
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Ways to get Dana off-board immediately: Monster Santa is canon. 
I always never liked to view the special as canon for ways that it fell flat before.
And I had the excuse of saying that the snowman was an unreliable narrator and I could adapt it down the line in my fic as a different story. 
I just didn’t like the idea of Monster-horror-blob santa...  Like... Cool design... but he just kinda represents everything I disliked about the special...  (including the major inconsistency of when Tak’s ship got fixed...)
But then again.. I need to remember IZ’s lore isn’t as consistent as I think it is sometimes... 
Okay, fine. Monster blob santa real... what else you got for me, Holiday special?
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FACE HUGGER SANTA! FACE HUGGER SANTA! I AM NOT INTO IT! 
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WHAT?! WHAT?! WHAT?! NO. DANA HATES THIS!
Okay, kinda into it because this means that ZIM CREATED SANTA in this mythos... I am dying.... wait.. this takes place in the future then...soo...?
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haoFhaGHAOhfgg 
It was all a dream?!  
GOOD.
my heart couldn’t take it if horror-santa was real... 
Also... that nightcap and bed... Does this mean we’re going to have an Invader Zim Christmas Carol?!?!?! I know that’s been adapted a schmillion times but I would be so into that.... 
Also... Flying... hamm...
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Good ol’ Zim... Repressing those memories...  
Also this being the THIRD ETF reference in a quarterly, It can be very safe to say the Quarterly issues take place after the events of ETF.
Clembrane exists in the Quarterly, Membrane has robot arms, Zim remembers this (kinda)  Yeah this is definately ETF verse and it’s here to stay. 
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Christmas Carol?! I’m down for this... and I can’t help but notice their claws look familiar
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OH HOLY HELL I WAS RIGHT! THESE GUYS! I LOVE THESE GUYS?!
Why are you here tho?
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I’m a bit lost on why these guys wanta take over the earth, but they’re hilarious so I’m just glad they’re here.
Also...   The Christmas Special is Schrodinger's Christmas... did it happen, or was it a dream, or the tales of a lunatic snowman... I guess I’ll never know. 
The issue goes on for an IZ Christmas Carol parody (heck yea) and the visions are all hilarious and I’m not gonna spoil them here... but...
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Eric.... this is terrifying..........thanks I hate it. 
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TINY DIB THOUGH! GHAOGHAHGAHAHA
THIS IS GREAT
THE MORE DIB SUFFERS THE MORE I LOVE IT!
“Though I am Dib and sickly father”
I’m dying XDDDDD
Also... What the fuck is Zim’s reaction here... 
I find it funny that Zim has put Dib into simulated realities before... (in the show and comics) and in the show, Dib is all powerful and in the comics, Dib is just himself and Zim is his brother..
But seeing a simulated Dib all weak and pathetic and chronically ill BOTHERS ZIM?!?!
That’s... well that’s interesting. 
Thought he’d laugh at this honestly, but he seems greatly annoyed... 
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I CHANGED MY MIND! THIS IS THE BEST THING! 
(those who know me know why I’m dying over this)
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YES!!!
ZIM DOESN’T LIKE WHEN PEOPLE FEEL BAD FOR HIM OR PITY HIM! 
(which confirms like a lot of my hcs and adds spicy kindling to my au much mad respect) 
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This I find interesting...  Zim complepative over his lonely/abandoned grave. It’s like he really doesn’t know how to feel. It’s more of a numbness then a sadness. Or he noticed how empty his life is... 
He feels lonely and empty about it...  which tracks considering how Zim’s greatest fear in the Trial was to be deleted and never be remembered by anyone. 
I don’t know... This panel makes me feel things...
Johnen: Haha. Zim’s not that deep a character.
Eric: Hey for the Christmas special, let’s have Zim parody a Christmas carol and feel lonely staring at his own empty grave when he realizes no one cares about him or misses him.
Johnen: Cool. Do it. 
What are you two assholes doing to me, man?! I have feelings! 
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AND ONCE AGAIN!
Zim hates pity and people feeling bad and sorry for him. 
Man this makes me so sad...  And it really feels like this issue looked into my brain again, cause I have some plans relating to Zim not wanting sympathy or pity from anyone later down the line (okay I’ll shut up about my au. We’re talking Zim here)
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And of course, Zim breaks everything like he usually does. (this time on purpose)
Also nice callback that Zim remembered that Dib said he liked his boots one time in the Poop-wizard issue. 
Also, it ends? I guess this quarterly has a few shorter stories this time... which I’m fine with. 
Also, Zim should consider Green and Blue like D-list friends at this point and just invite them in for some fundip or something (come on, Zim, it’s Christmas.....) 
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GASP!?!?!
LITTLE MEMBRANE!!!
AND GRANDPARENTS CONFIRMED!!! 
Wait... so his Parents are scientists too? Is that why he always wanted to be a scientist?
But then wait.... If Membrane inherited Membrane Labs from his parents... Why is HIS FACE the brand of the Company?..... There’s so much Membrane-face brand merch in the show. (it decorates his home..) 
Like even if they were dead, if his parents founded Membrane labs, I feel they’d still be the face. of the company... (that’s how a lot of corporate faces are these days... they show some old dead guy who made the company as opposed to the son who inherited the Company.... Like everyone knows who Walt Disney/Mickey Mouse is, but unless you pay close attention to that kinda thing, not everyone knows who the current chairman or CEO is in the modern age....)
I just find that a bit odd. 
Anyways... I feel people can still do what they want with Membrane’s parents and get away with it. I’m not changing my “his parents were farmers” headcanon. Sorry comic..
BUT I LOVE THEIR DESIGNS.
I love how Membrane looks a lot like his mother, and his father is just BUFF GAZ with a pipe.... Truely legends. 
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GASP!!!
COLLEGEBRANE COLLEGEBRANE COLLEGEBRANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LOOKOUT DIB, THIS IS YOUR FUTURE!
I FUCKING LOVE HOW OILY HE LOOKS.. AND IT ADDS UP CAUSE...
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The Membrane Men when they don’t shower or bathe in months.....
Someone help these two.
(thank god Membrane got better at personal hygiene.) 
Also Teenbrane STILL has his human arms and not his robo-arms.
This means he loses his arms later in life...  YUSH HORRAY FOR HEADCANNONS BEING VALIDATED!
He didn’t lose his arms in a shark accident when he was a KID! It happened WAY LATER!
NICE!
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OH MY GOD HE IS BABY!
HE IS SO SHY AND ACKWARD! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
I LOVE HIM!
He is just... all sweat and hiding his work but also very passionate and spiteful. 
Like you can see who he grew up to become, and you can also see how a kid like Dib came out of a man like him...
But I love social anxiety awkward early twenties/late teens Membrane... He is a baby! 
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
MEMBRANE ;w;
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Basically, Membrane knows that Santa isn’t real, but he doesn’t want to be mad at his parents so he harbors a grudge on Santa instead... THAT’S SO SWEET I’M CRYING  TTmTT
LIKE THAT IS SO SWEET AND I’M CRYING!
(also I love how me and Ceph understand Membrane’s character too well that the gesture he does in the 2nd panel here are reminisant of our fic so many times... Like we have his mannerisms down and I love when the mask slips from Membrane and we get to see a real person... augh soo good) 
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WHO GAVE THEM THE RIGHT TO MAKE MY MAN THIS SAD?! ONLY I CAN MAKE HIM SAD!
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MEMBRANE TTMTT
AUUUGHH
Also probably guessing the parents are dead...   I’m just laughing at their designs... 
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Yes you are, Professor Membrane... Don’t let anyone tell you different. (actually, please do) Well, I mean,  At least you’re trying and get progressively better.
(also... this probably means everytime Dib has asked his Dad for a dangerous weapon to fight Zim with, Membrane just gives it to him no questions asked and I’m doing a MAJOR concern about this man’s parenting skills... get help please good sir!) 
Also, Dib really saved the day again here (like he did in Dib’s big day)
Dib called about destroying santa when Membrane was in one of his lowest points...  He hides it really well...   Especially from his children..
Ah..  I loved that one.
But I’m a huge Membrane Simp though.
I did find the stuff about Membrane’s parents a little weird... like I said regarding how Membrane’s face is the brand of Membrane labs...
Could be true that they were other scientists and that Membrane founded Membrane labs later... but that seems highly unlikely... 
Also... Why does the house look that hug when in the christmas special, it looked kinda like...well... just not that, and kinda more humble from the interior and not some big rocket lab...
So yeah... AMAZING character building for Membrane (which I eat up)
Hilarious Grandparent Designs. But I still prefer @esthyradler​ ‘s Grandparents. The superior Grandparents.
Anyways... The Quarterly was GREAT! 
I kinda find it funny the Zim story is the weaker one of the two again... But I honestly blame the Christmas Horror blob connection and the Christmas Carol parody. 
Or maybe my Membrane Bias is clouding my mind here.  I do have Zim bias but sometimes Zim can frustrate me. There’s just so many times Zim can do and say the same things you know? Zim is my baby, but sometimes his denial and annoyance with everyone can be very predictable at points. Zim was just way more fun in the last quarterly than this one. 
With Membrane it’s more of a blank slate what to do with him cause he ony started really mattering as a character since ETF. Yes, I do love show Membrane, but I admit he wasn’t exactly a character then. More of a presence and excuse for why Dib had access to lab equipment. With Dib’s Dilemma and this Hoilday special, the Quarterly folks seem determined to turn him into a fully realized character with the rest of the cast and I’m extremely excited to hear that!
(Computer issue/backstory WHEN?!) 
I don’t really have ratings or systems for these but hope you liked my thoughts.
Merry Christmas everyone.
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albatris · 4 years
Note
uhm hi there im new to your blog, and your ocs/snippets seem really interesting! i also love your art, but i have no idea whos who and i can’t seem to find a master post with all of your characters, what they look like, their pronouns, backstory etc. would it be possible for you to maybe give a brief rundown of each character or link some posts related to them?? it doesn’t have to be super in depth and please DO NOT feel obligated to do this at all if you don’t want to. but id love to know a little bit more about them! hope you have a good day and sorry for the long message :))
hello!!! thank you so much, that’s so nice of you to say!!! I’m glad you’ve enjoyed what you’ve seen so far :D :D
now, you’ll have to forgive me, it’s super late and this reply will NOT be neat or concise whatsoever....... which kinda sets the tone for most of this blog tbh so I guess it’s cool
I don’t really have any sort of masterpost, most of what I post about these guys is in the form of snippets and rambles and usually people just jump on board wherever..... which, yeah, can be confusing and difficult for folks to keep up with especially if they’re new HAHAHA
I will start out with the bits I *do* have nice neat intros for! I have two main WIPs, All The Doors Are Open and Undertow! Undertow is currently more of a side project, but you can read about the characters here, and here’s some art for Aster and Kit and also Meg so you have faces to the names c:
and now this:
the main four I speak about on this blog are Noa, Tris, Shara and Kai from ATDAO, n I have these handy character intros on hand for this exact purpose!! here u go (I mean here’s the link to the old post but it’s still got the wrong name for Tris so eh)
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n honestly knowing these four is like 90% of the work tbh, I am a simple man, I post content about the same four OCs 24/7 until everyone is sick of it,,
Tris and Noa are the protagonists and viewpoint characters! 
Tris’s plotline involves him trying to figure out what happened to his older brother Jacob, who got hit by a car and straight-up vanished from existence entirely, and involves a quest into an unreality that can be described as “getting lost down the back of an interdimensional sofa”. also there’s a sword and a cat. think fantasy/adventure vibes that veer into horror
Noa’s plotline involves her work at the Department of Interdimensional Instabilities! and her becoming tangled up with otherworldly energies and gaining some strange powers, as well as her clash with basically-a-cartoon-supervillain Laurence Marrick Thiele, whose full name I like to type out and who’s attempting to manipulate interdimensional doorways for his own gain and putting a hell of a lot of people’s lives in peril. think mystery/sci-fi vibes!
Shara and Kai aren’t viewpoint characters but they’re still up there as MCs and I love them! Shara’s story centres around her attempting to solve three mysteries from her childhood which she believes will lead her to the source of the apocalypse, and Kai’s story involves them dealing with the emotional and interpersonal repercussions of losing seven years of their life to a time loop and their attempts to reconnect with their family, who thought they were dead
annnnnnnnd that’s basically all the nice neat concise stuff I can give ya! 
under the cut will be some additional rambles you don’t really need to read, I’m not so good at coming up with Nice Neat Character Summaries on the fly, so it’s just me scrambling about to find vaguely relevant posts and links..... it will unfortunately be a bit of a mess and perhaps only tangentially relevant
cannot emphasise enough that I debated not even including the next stuff but hey! I like talking
OK SO
Other side characters you might see around are Alice (she/her, red curly hair, undercut, dresses in lots of green) and Jet (he/they, green spiky hair, freckles, dresses like a thrift store got hit by a tornado), who are Noa’s teammates at the DII! Alice is Noa’s love interest n is cool and mysterious and Jet is the team leader n is completely chaotic and unhinged
these two
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There’s also Kai’s younger brother Kieran (he/him) and Tris’s siblings Becca (she/her) and Jacob (he/him), none of whom I have ever drawn more than twice and whose appearances seem to change every time I write about them so I’m not going to describe them here hahahaha
I do have a Kieran for you though uhhhh where’s my One Decent Kieran Drawing
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that’s the one!
anyway, backstories are................ a lot. so I don’t think I’m gonna go into too much of it here on this post
I have, like........ a collection of posts scattered all over the place that kind of go into some things? but in very tangential ways. I’ll toss you some plot + character rambles that might be of interest! though my rambles are not everyone’s cup of tea ‘cause they’re, well, rambling
first! the plot of the story is here! which might give you some context for the Everything! this one is a Big ramble, not all of them are like this lol
Greer siblings!
romance?
here’s Jacob info for an ask response I did one time which is one of the few posts where I talk about Jacob at length ‘cause he’s just lots of spoilers
also did one for Kai which might have some info for ya?? but idk if it’s all that relevant
might come back and add more rambles later, it is currently 2 in the AM
or I might come back and be like “logan could you really not think of a better way to answer this question” and delete the rambles
yeehaw thx for listening I love you
also apologies for the complete and utter lack of info on Kieran he is a mystery that eludes me still
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snickiebear · 3 years
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yo nadia <3333 i'm bored in my online classes and u reblogged the questions thingy at the right time lmao, so get ready: 1, 4, 5, 9, 10, 17, 23, 24, 28, 30!!!, 34, 38, 39, 40 (the intimacy of being understood) (imma stop here lol) (also i'm sorry u're not feeling well, ily and hope u'll feel better soon!! <33333)
ELE ILY. (and thank you, i’m stayin home today cause,,, yeah. i appreciate you sm.) you’re the literal best, i adore you. 
1. How long ago did you start reading fanfiction? Writing fanfiction?
The first fanfiction i read was for The Lunar Chronicles when I was like 11?? and it was 100% on accident and it scarred me because it was a hardcore porn one with a period kink and i was like WHAT IS THIS??? OH MY GOD???? LMAOOOOO i didn’t pick it back up until i was 13-14 and really got into the Fairy Tail fandom. I still reread my favorites on ff.net cause i love them. 
As for writing, I wrote a horrible, terrible x-men fanfiction when I was twelve. (my friend still brings it up and REFUSES to delete it so it still gets comments and views, that shit HAUNTS ME ELE.) then tried again for Fairy Tail, posted like two chapters before taking it down cause i wasn’t really feeling it. And then I posted The Intimacy Of Being Understood and here we are. 
4. Link your three favorite fics right now.
OMGG okok 
@murd3rm1ttens ‘s The Problem How Time Works IF YOU HAVENT READ THIS YOU GUYS NEED TO HOP ON IT ASAP. MITTEN’S WRITING SO SO SO SO GOOD. SAKURA AND INO ARE TOTAL BADASSES. KAKASHI IS A SIMPPPP. ITS SO FUCKING GOOD. 
@mouseymightymarvellous ‘s We Were Screaming In Color (Only A Possibility) yes, yes I KNOW. i always point into mousey’s direction but i WILL always advocate that everyone reads her fics, they’re literally so beautiful???? i just happen to be rereading WWSIN rn 
@safelycapricious ‘s Shaking Up And Breaking Down series. I found this like?? idfk but i’ve been raving about it ever since. ALSO CHECK OUT THEIR FICS IN GENERAL. 
fuck i have more than three but also check out @ambivalens999 ‘s Masks
i do wanna make a fic rec thing where i just rav about my favs,,, might do that later or sum
5. What are your fanfic pet peeves? Do they have a huge effect on whether or not you decide to read something?
Omniscient third person. I don’t like it. Like I can understand that it can be a little hard to stay in one person’s perspective but, in my opinion, if you can, it shows how disciplined you are as a writer. Plus, i just get so confused when I go from A’s thoughts to suddenly what B is thinking about A. 
When writers use ‘ ‘ instead of “ “. When writers put thoughts in ‘ ‘ instead of just italicizing them. It’s small things but like they just bother me sO MUCH. most of the time i can ignore it and try to enjoy but other times i just dip. 
9. Tag 3 fic writers you think are underrated/unknown in the fandom/fanfiction community.
@espoir-et-reves !!!!! THEIR SHISAKU FICS ARE SO SO SO SO SO GOOD. And they have a warring states one going on THAT I AM SO OBSESSED WITH. 
@writer168 idk if they’re really “underrated” but THEY HAVE SUCH GREAT FICS ON AO3. Like theres an AU with sakura, kiba, and shino that i reread constantly because it just. is. so. fucking. GOOD. and they posted a new one that i’m YELLING about. 
@eggtoasties okay they only have 2 in the naruto fandom (one shisaku which is still ongoing) BUT THEIR WRITING STYLE IS SO NICE?? I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT. I still go back and reread their shikasaku one cause UGH i can’t get enough. I love it. 
10. What’s your favorite fandom, pairing, or character to read fic for?
Fandoms: Naruto, Soul Eater, The Old Guard, ATLA
Parings: KakaSaku/ShikaSaku/ShiSaku/MultiSaku, SoMa, Joe X Nicky, Zukka
Character: SAKURA. I will read anything with Sakura as the main character and her being a fuckin badass or becoming a badass. I love her.
17. How obsessively do you sit and stare at your fic after you’ve just posted and wait for feedback?
aha.. haha.. well. I check my email like three times an hour. its the first thing i check in the mornings too. I’m literally a whore for praise and literally eat up feedback like its going out of style. I also reread a lot of my stuff because i make so many mistakes and spelling errors, or the spacing is weird oR SOMETHING. plus, literally any and all comments make my day, i go back and reread them cause they just make me feel so tingly and warm like “wow. this person enjoyed the fic/my writing enough to tell me. thats HUGE!”
23. What’s your absolute favorite trope to write?
Angry, feral, bloodied, morally gray women. They aren’t bad guys, they’re probably the good guy, but that doesn’t mean they cant be fucking raging at the world with raw knuckles and blood on their teeth. I just love an angry woman who struggles with her emotions and just has so much inner conflict but that doesn’t take away from her character or badassery, it adds to it. 
24. What’s a trope that you’d like to never hear about as long as you live, let alone write?
The fake dating or miscommunication troupe. LIKE GUYS JUST TALK. AND TELL EACH OTHER OMFG. the entire like obliviousness of “nah they dont like me” while the They holds their hand and kisses their cheek. MOFO WHAT. it makes me so impatient and like mad HAAHHAHA. its probably because i’m a pretty confrontational person so seeing stuff like that just “cmon bro, USE YO HEAD.”
28. How do you deal with writing pressure (ie: pressure to update, negative comments, deadlines, etc)?
I have yet to receive a negative comment! Which i was really surprised about tbh. As for deadlines or pressure to update, i just kind of do whatever. I do set goals, but i set them flexible enough that hey, if i can’t do it, that’s okay. 
I have a lot of mini goals, like “i want to write this chapter and get it done this week” and then the large goal is “FINISH BY END OF MAY” so i have time. 
Actually, now that I think on it, the entire pressure to update thing is probably why i’m waiting until I have all of OL&W written to post it weekly,, cause well. I wouldn’t wanna leave you guys waiting as I tried to write and work out the next chapters and stuff, you know?
30. Post a snippet from your current WIP without context - no more than 300 words.
AAAAAA YOU KNOW I LOVE THESE AHAHAHAH
Have you seen the way the dead dance, World Breaker? They roar, half mad and starving. Do you not wish, do you not hope to see them twist and bend and dance to your will?
Shikamaru snarls, looking behind his shoulders to where his Shadows lay. “Patience.” He spits. “Is of the essence, Things of Ancient. Know your place as the dark you are.”
34. How much of yourself and your life experiences do you put into your writing? What do you think your readers’ image of you is?
None of my experiences match up to anything I write tbh,,, probably the only thing that is me in my writing is maybe the emotional turmoil? I’m pretty emotionally and mentally mature because from a pretty young age i started forming my own opinions, started looking into the world around us and being like “dude what the fuck this is not what disney advertised”. Then i started talking (read: arguing and debating) with my dad about a lot of it. So, like emotions are kind of hard for me. Like i’m pretty good at controlling them or understanding them, but still. idk its hard to explain ig.
Like the weight of stress, the anger, the sadness. It’s kind of therapeutic to write. Cause i don’t know how to put those feelings to verbal words so writing them really helps. 
As for my readers’ image? Probably like some kind of hunched over figure typing away in the dark with a maniacal grin on their face. I honestly don’t know AHHAHAHA but it is fun to think about. I think they’d see me as someone with potential but a lot of room to grow and someone who is imperfect but in a charming way LMAOOOO
38. What does your writing process look like? How chaotic is it on a scale of 1 (very tame) to 10 (you can’t handle this kind of chaos)?
I’m gonna be real honest. Its probably like a 2. I’m a bit of a control freak so I almost always go in chronological order, my writing is pretty linear. Unless, i get bored and jump to one of my fav parts. It's pretty much i sit down, i open the doc, read over my notes and just start writing. 
It’s a little boring to explain AHAHAHA but once i get into the groove of things its really fucking great, I can like feel myself in the world, I can feel what i want the characters to, i love it. I catch myself mouthing the words as i type too, which i find hilarious.
39. What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?
I rather like how raw my writing is sometimes. Which might sound really vain, but i do like the way i word things or describe things. I love juxtaposition and repetition, or making a good ole circle back to some minute detail that wouldn’t stand out until i repeat it at the end and you’re like “omg” AHAHAHAHA.
Like those little poetic snippets or certain wording i just sit back and go “damn thats kinda good nadia! go you!’ HAHAHA  
40. How did you come up with the idea for The Intimacy Of Being Understood?
AAAAA this fic is like my first child, my pride and joy LMAO
so the idea initially came when i was reading some fic, idk if it was even naruto, but i was like “i don't like this, but i do like the rain symbolism.” And I knew i wanted to write something kind of slow paced, something a little sad and angsty, but would show KakaSaku slowly but surely falling in love.
Idk if you’ve noticed but a lot of my fics, the pairings don’t change each other dramatically. They accept each other as they are and then they grow with together. Like that acceptance is something i just love writing, its so subtle, it isn’t something you declare. Its simply “I am going to love you. I am going to love you despite your flaws and faults. I am going to love you unconditionally because I know you, I understand you, and there is nothing you could do to drive me away.” 
The fic kind of wrote itself after that first scene. I kept going back to the rain, go being ghosts, and resurrection, and the small epiphanies one gets. I wanted to focus on each character’s growth with each other. They didn’t find light in life because of each other, but with each other. And i think that’s my favorite thing about that fic. 
I wanted something raw and real and just something beautiful. I’m actually really proud of it tbh. Would i go back and rewrite/edit it? Oh of course! I’d do that with every single one of my fics, but i’m not gonna cause i think its in its rawest form right now. :))))
ask me shit plz
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