#might make some more edits of her while i work on sink or swim

[citylighten]

Angela & Bijou

[mercy-burning]

I’ve Got You

Part of Mercy’s 1k Celebration: A collection of Spencer Reid x Reader requests to celebrate 1,000 followers.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: An embarrassed Reader accepts a swimming lesson from Spencer Category: FLUFF / SMUT ending (will be specified before it splits) Warnings: Language, fluffy smut at the end Word Count: 5.5k

Full Request: “...For your 1k celebration, I was wondering if you could write a fic where Spencer teaches reader how to swim, and then smut happens? Congratulations for 1k btw 🥰!” — @jareauswifey

***EDITED: 7/23/2021***

MASTERLIST | 1K MASTERLIST

NOTE: Fun fact: I don’t know how to swim either, so this was incredibly fun to write and I can’t wait for you guys to read it! 

Also, the more I wrote this the more it became absolutely fluffy, but since there was a request for smut, I wrote it in as an extra ending. So the majority of this is still fluffy, and there’s a good, solid end for those who don’t/can’t read smut. But the smut is added at the end for those who want it. Totally up to you! I hope y’all really enjoy this one!!

***

"Wait, she dragged you into the pool?"

"She didn't... drag me, she pulled me in."

"Look, no matter how you say it, Pretty Boy, the fact of the matter is, you ended up making out with a movie star in her pool. I call that a win."

While everyone in the bullpen was laughing, you found yourself distanced from the conversation, definitely not thrilled about the idea of re-living the case you'd just worked. And you loved Garcia as much as the next person, but this was one of those times you wished she wasn't so adamantly curious about everyone's personal lives.

"Look, it's not even a big deal, okay, people... kiss each other in pools all the time," Reid got out quickly, also not very thrilled about this conversation. "I mean, you've all done it, right?"

Garcia, Morgan, Elle, and JJ all recounted quickly a few times they'd experienced it, and you were hoping desperately that they wouldn't ask you, since you'd stayed quiet pretty much the whole time, immersing yourself in paperwork (or so you made them believe; you were really just trying not to think about how sad this whole situation made you).

But, of course, it was not your week.

"What about you, Y/N?" Garcia asked. You looked up to see all of your friends looking at you expectantly, and you felt like you could have cried right then and there.

"O—oh, um... I haven't... done that before."

You wanted to smack the smile off Morgan's face when he said, "Oh, so you're telling me Pretty Boy's got Pretty Girl beat in something for once?"

"That's... That's not true, he beats me at everything," you countered, already feeling your face get warm. "Look, it isn't a big deal. It's just not something I've ever done before, and there's nothing wrong with that."

"Never said there was... Why are you getting so defensive?"

The teasing tone in his voice made everything worse, especially since he knew about your huge crush on Reid. He was the first one to point it out, and you swore him to secrecy. And now, he was threatening to expose you, and you wanted to tackle him, even though you were positive you wouldn't get very far.

"I'm not defensive! I just... I haven't kissed anyone in a pool before, and Reid's right, you guys are acting like it's a big deal when it isn't, that's all."

"Well, how come?" Morgan pressed.

"How come it's not a big deal?"

"No, how come you haven't done it?"

That settled it. You were going to deck him in the face the first chance you got.

"Because... I... I can't swim."

You'd said it so quietly, completely embarrassed over the fact, but everyone still was able to hear you.

"You can't?" Elle asked, obviously amused.

"No," you stated firmly, crossing your arms and huffing, a strand of your hair blowing away from your face as you did so. "Before you ask why, I just always had other things to do growing up, and I never bothered to learn. And there's nothing wrong with that either, by the way."

You refused to look at your friends as they took in all this information about you, and by this point you couldn't wait to go home. In fact, you were thinking about leaving right now, to save yourself from further embarrassment.

But then, of freaking course, Derek Morgan had to say something.

"Hey, maybe Reid could teach you how."

The second you were alone with him, he was dead meat.

Your face was even warmer now, and you wanted nothing more than to hide, maybe under the desk, though perhaps a hole in the ground in the middle of nowhere sounded more satisfying. Hell, anything sounded more satisfying than being here right now.

"Ha-ha," you laughed instead, trying to play it off like a joke-suggestion. "I'm sure Reid has better things to do with his time than teaching a woman in her twenties how to swim."

"Are you kidding me, Reid never has anything better to do with his time," Morgan countered, earning a few chuckles from the room.

You rolled your eyes and started to gather your things. You were going to decline and say goodnight, but before you could someone spoke up.

"I—if it's something you really wanted to learn, I could... I wouldn't mind teaching you the basics... or something."

As much as you didn't want to look at Reid in that moment, you did it anyway, because you had to make sure he was being serious. To make sure you'd heard that right.

"What?" you asked quietly.

"Well... You are always saying how we should hang out more. Maybe... it would be a good idea?"

You had said that. But that was before. You know, when you were starting to grow your confidence around him. When you were finally starting to grow the guts to ask him out on a date. Before he started kissing movie stars in pools...

Now all that confidence had been shattered, and you felt smaller than you'd ever been, embarrassed and incredibly babied at your inability to fucking swim.

All of this should have nudged you to say, "no". It should have saved you from making any rash decisions, but...

The way Reid was looking at you, so genuine in that kind way of his, you could have sworn he was begging you to say, "yes".

Or maybe that was your crush talking.

Whatever the case, it was that stupid crush that pushed all reason out of your brain and made you agree.

"O—okay.  Why not?"

Your friends clapped, Reid smiled at you, and you could practically feel Morgan's burning Gotcha! look all the way from the other side of the room.

What were you getting yourself into?

***

You almost thought about bailing. There was no way you were going to survive this! Not only was it embarrassing enough that you couldn't swim, but now the guy you have the biggest crush on was going to teach you how? You were going to have to see him, wet, and he was going to have to see you in a swimsuit, and he was probably going to touch you, too.

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck—

You were about to call Reid and tell him you weren't feeling well, but just as you got out your phone, he showed up in front of you, walking into the pool room at the hotel you were staying at for the weekend. Neither of you had a pool, and to avoid further embarrassment on your part, he offered to rent a room for the weekend so you could use the pool when no one else would be there. In theory it was a good idea, but in actuality it was an awful idea, because now not only did you have to take swimming lessons from your crush, but you were sharing a room with him for the weekend as well.

It was your worst nightmare.

"Hey! I—I got here a little earlier than planned, so I wasn't gonna wait here that long, and I... Never mind. I'm sorry. Hello." Great, now I'm rambling... Good start, Y/N...

Reid laughed a little, setting down a bag. "Hi, Y/N. Are you still sure you want to do this? I know... I kind of pushed it on you last minute, and—"

"No! I'm... It's probably something I should learn at some point anyway... Better get it done now while I can, right?"

"Yeah, I suppose you're right. So, uh... You want to get started?"

You turned to the pool, gesturing with your arms. "Lead the way, Genius."

He laughed a little and made his way to the water, and you took a deep breath as you followed behind, hoping you wouldn't make a bigger fool of yourself than you already had.

Reminding yourself to breathe and stay cool, you reluctantly and very slowly made your way into the water, staying close to the edges even though you were tall enough to stand with the water sitting safely at your chest. You'd been in pools before, but always just like this, at the edge. Your friends growing up were always supportive in your decision not to do anything more, even though they'd offered multiple times to teach you, but the truth was that you were quite afraid of being in deep water.

You were never going to tell them that, though. You weren't even sure you wanted to tell Spencer. But you supposed that if he was really going to teach you how to swim, you'd have to come clean.

Just... Not right now.

"Hmm... Okay, so I'm thinking for now I should teach you how to float."

Shit.

"Um... O—kay..."

He could tell you were nervous, it was obvious by the sympathetic way he looked at you and tilted his head. "I know it's probably intimidating because you don't know how to swim, but floating is actually pretty easy."

He then proceeded to lean back and float on his back. His head was tilted so he could still look at you, and he looked serene. Calm. And supportive, as he said, "There's nothing to it, all you have to do is lean back and just let your body relax. It might feel like you're starting to sink a little, but you won't."

"WhywouldyoutellmethatohmyGod," you squeaked, leaning out and holding very tightly to the edge of the pool. The panic you outwardly exuded was just about the most embarrassing thing you could have done, and it only made you feel worse, shutting your eyes tightly and regretting every life choice youd ever made.

Reid was suddenly beside you, laying a gentle hand on your shoulder, and you jumped, making him retreat. "Y/N, hey. Look at me."

You didn't want to. God, you wanted to do anything else. You would have rather floated in the water.

But you did it anyway, refusing to make things worse.

His face was just as soft as his touch, and even though you had nothing to worry about, you felt like you were going to cry.

"Are you... afraid of the water?" It wasn't mean or mocking. It was a genuine, concerned observation, and that somehow made it even worse.

"Y—yes," you choked out, feeling your throat start to tighten.

"Why did you agree to do this, then? I... I'm still more than happy to help you, but if you're afraid, you don't have to do anything you don't want to. I won't make you..."

"I know that, I just... You were practically begging to teach me how to swim, and I didn't want to make you sad," you joked hoping it would lighten the mood and keep you from actually shedding any tears.

Thankfully he laughed, and it made you laugh right along with him, some of your troubles easing and the tightness in your throat letting up just a little. The two of you were silent for a few beats before you reached out with one hand and grabbed his, taking a deep breath and nodding.

"Okay. I'm ready to let you teach me how to float. I promise I won't... freak out this time."

He looked down at your hand on his for a second, something changing in his eyes before he looked back up. "Are you sure?"

No. "Yes."

"Okay... Do you... want to stay here by the edge?"

You scoffed. "Where else would we go?"

"Um... Never mind, we'll stay here. Just um... Come here?"

You laughed a little at the fact that he didn't get that you were joking, and then let go of the ledge with your other hand, pulling yourself towards him and letting him get closer. His hands gently held onto your arms as your feet planted themselves on the pool floor. The proximity was surprisingly calming, considering your outburst just a minute earlier, and you were thankful for that.

Despite all the mess, things weren't nearly as bad as you'd imagined they'd be.

"Okay," Spencer said, nodding slightly. "I'm going to float first. I want you to keep your hands pressed up under my back, okay?"

"But... don't you already know how to float? What do you need me for?"

"I'm demonstrating how light your body weight is while you're in water. See, when I go back like this..."

That was your cue. He leaned back just like he had before, and your hands moved, laying your palms out to lay under his back as instructed. You instantly understood what he meant, because he started to sink a little, and when you lifted him up, it was like he weighed nothing.

"So, even if you do start to sink, I'll be right there to keep you steady. You'll be just fine," he reassured, standing up again. You removed your hands and smiled at him, already feeling better about this.

"Okay. How do I... Go back? Do I just..."

"Oh, uh... Here," he offered, reaching out his arms. You walked into them, and instantly felt your heartbeat pick up when he wrapped them around you, the two of you closer than you'd ever been.

"I'm going to lay you on your back, okay? I've got you."

You nodded, unable to form any words. And when he leaned your body back into the water, you were suddenly aware of all he could see.

Warmth flooded through you as you looked up at him, his hands planting themselves firmly under your back. Your bare back. One of them was pressed against the tie on your upper back, and immediately your mind went there, imagining his fingers deftly untying the knot and letting your bathing top come undone. Your heart raced faster and faster, and it was becoming harder to relax.

"Y/N, it's okay," Spencer said, snapping you out of it. "I'm right here. I'm not going to let you go, okay?"

"Okay," you whispered. "I trust you."

"I'm gonna start letting you go, okay? Just relax your muscles, take nice, calm breaths, and let everything go. Just... float."

His words were soft and whispered, so light it was like in a past life they were dandelion seeds floating in the wind on a warm summer day. You closed your eyes and focused on that image, the white fluff floating in a field, and your body started to relax.

"That's it," you barely heard Spencer's voice as you drifted off. Everything was light, airy, and... non-existent.

You weren't sure how long you stayed like that, but eventually you realized that there was nothing holding you up anymore. Nothing was there to ground you, to keep you steady.

Your heart leapt out of your chest, and you gasped, flailing and you felt your face start to go under as a result. "No!" you screamed, suddenly panicked.

Almost as quickly as the panic set in, Spencer's arms were wrapped around you again, pulling you from under the water and into his body. Your arms instantly clung to his neck, trying to pull yourself up and away from the water, where it couldn't drown you.

"Y/N, hey, I've got you. It's okay, I'm right here. You're okay..."

"I'm done," you breathed, trying to calm yourself. "Can we be done?"

"Yes, we can be done," he said back softly, using one of his hands to stroke the wet hair from your face.

Despite your urgency to be done, however, you stayed like that, wrapped up in him for what felt like forever. His hand continued stroking your hair and his lips continued to whisper sweet words of encouragement and praise. Gradually your breathing slowed to a steady pace, and you almost forgot where you were again. At least until he spoke up.

"Are you okay?"

You lifted your head back to look into his eyes, managing to get out a quick, "Uh huh," even as your breath caught in your throat. The way he was looking at you with such concern and sweetness sent a course of butterflies through your stomach. They migrated out towards your chest, accompanying your heartbeat in a quick, thundering pace that only seemed to get faster when his hand grazed your cheek.

Against your better judgement, your eyes fluttered closed, and you savored the feeling of his hands on you. The one brushed down your cheek and over your neck and collarbone, while the other found purchase against your lower back, his thumb rubbing comforting circles just above the hemline of your swim bottoms.

You felt his forehead touch yours and audibly gasped, clinging tighter to his neck and refusing to open your eyes.

"I've got you," he said so softly you weren't even sure you heard it at all. "I've always got you. Can you plant your feet down?"

You were still close enough to the edge of the pool that you knew you could, but in all honesty you'd forgotten you were even there. The sheer panic that came with floating on your own made you feel like you were in the middle of the ocean, and if he hadn't told you otherwise, you would have believed it to be true.

"I can," you answered truthfully. "But I don't want to."

With your foreheads pressed together still, you opened your eyes to find him staring at you, and it was sheer sparkling amusement you found swimming in his gaze as he spoke.

"Then don't."

You weren't sure who moved first. The next thing you knew, your lips were pressed together, and it was all you could take not to simply absorb into him. Which... of course, you practically did anyway. Because of the water, he lifted you to him with ease, giving you a better angle to cling to him since you'd done it so frantically before.

Your lips moved together without a care in the world, the two of you taking your time to just feel the moment. The tender, caring way in which he reciprocated and explored your kiss was almost as butterfly-inducing as all the simple looks he'd thrown your way and the gentle tone he always took with you.

It was almost as if he liked you back.

The thought made you pull away, breathless and dizzy, and the sheer look of contentment, followed by immense panic that set on Spencer's face brought you back to real life.

"I'm sorry," he rushed. "I... Y/N, I..."

Knowing you were already in too deep, you stopped him. "I like you."

He was silent. Frozen. And then, simply, "What?"

You sighed. "I... I like you. I have a crush on you. And I've had a crush on you pretty much from the moment we met. And I... I was trying to find the courage to tell you, and then the thing with Lila Archer happened and I wasn't even... like, she's so pretty, and she can swim, obviously, and I just felt like a total loser after that case, and so when you said you—"

Your words were cut off when he kissed you again, and you'd never been so surprised. Well, save for the panic you felt while floating in the water on your own just a few minutes ago, you supposed...

Though you were inclined to say this surprise was much better.

He pulled away after a few seconds, searching your eyes. "I like you, too," he said quietly.

"Y—You do?"

"Well, of course I do. You're... You're smart, and you're beautiful, a—and you're really good at swimming..."

You laughed. Hard. And Spencer laughed right along with you, until the two of you were just there, smiling at each other. And eventually, you ended up kissing each other again, just as you had before.

Only this time, your kisses got deeper. With every second, the two of you became more hungry, the low and soft moans coming from the bass of your throat urging him to become bolder.

Rather than holding you up by your back, he lowered his hands, gently over your butt and hooking under your thighs as your legs clung around his waist. Your arms still stayed around his neck, only now your fingers weaved through the hair at the nape of it, and when you tugged a little, he moaned into your mouth.

You didn't know how you got there, but all of a sudden, your back was pressed up against the edge of the pool, and you used that leverage to let go of his neck and let your hands roam freely, over his arms and down his chest.

But eventually the two of you had to come up for air, so you broke apart reluctantly, both panting and smiling like fools.

"So, is, uh... is this a hobby of yours?" you asked. "Making out with girls in pools?"

Spencer laughed, pressing his forehead to yours. "Only recently, but... I think this time is the only one that really counts."

He nuzzled his nose against yours and you laughed, feeling completely warm all over and suddenly thankful for not being able to swim.

***NSFW ENDING BELOW***

Now it was just... weird. Maybe that wasn't the right word, but it definitely was a weird feeling.

You'd both showered separately, barely saying a word to each other in between that wasn't awkward mumbling... And now you were sleeping in separate beds, faced away from each other, and you were pretty sure that neither of you were actually awake.

It had been like that for hours.

You weren't positive of how he was feeling right now, but you were still on fire. His kisses had burned you in a way that still lingered, even after taking a warm shower to clean the chlorine from your body, and a small cold shower to refresh you and quell the heat you were feeling that was no doubt a product of him.

Because nothing ever seemed to work out in your favor, it obviously hadn't worked.

So there you were, trying and failing to sleep, hyperaware of Spencer sleeping(?) in the bed next to yours, pressing your fingers to your lips and hoping you could recover from this.

You... liked each other, though... You'd both admitted it, mutually agreed that the feelings were there on both sides, and you happily kissed one another. A lot.

So why was this feeling so weird? Why was everything awkward? Maybe it was just a byproduct of your awkwardness and his combining, rather than cancelling each other out and creating a perfect match. Maybe it wouldn't last, because you'd always heard that opposites attracted, and as far as you could tell, you and Spencer Reid were anything but opposite.

The thought made you curl into a ball, all the awkwardness you were feeling suddenly dissolving into a sorrow and worry that had never nagged you like this before. The burning your body had felt before seemed to cool, leaving you numb and hollow.

But then, a beam of light through the clouds.

"Y/N?"

"Y—yeah?" you said back, matching his near-whisper.

"I know we have our own beds, but... I... I was wondering i—if maybe you'd want... to sleep in mine? With me?"

Maybe it was pathetic and desperate, but you didn't answer. You got up from your bed—practically leapt— and met him in a few strides, getting in under the covers and laying down, facing him in the dark your eyes had adjusted to.

He was smiling, half triumphant and half amused at your eagerness. "Can't sleep either?"

"No," you said quietly, still searching what little of his eyes you could see. "I... Truthfully, I think I just missed being close to you."

"Me, too," he whispered, scooting closer.

His hands were tentative in touching you, but you gently gripped his wrist and guided it to your waist, where it firmly rested and brought warmth back into your veins. Even through the fabric of your tee shirt, his touch burned hot, and it was everything you needed.

But it wasn't everything you got.

He leaned forward and kissed your forehead, and it burned just as hotly. It made you scoot even closer, until your chests were practically flush and your arms rested firmly around his neck again, making him smile. You felt it against your forehead, and that alone was enough to fully bring you back to life.

You wanted more. Just being close to him wasn't enough anymore. So you stretched a little and found your way to his neck, pressing soft kisses under his jaw. The grip on your waist tightened a little, and it urged you forward, strengthening your kisses and even encouraging you to get in a few licks and bites.

He stuttered your name, and you pulled back, looking at his face. But before you could say anything, he leaned forward and captured your lips in a kiss that could only be described as pure desperation. You sighed against him and purely relented as he pulled you closer. Instinctively your leg lifted and wrapped around his, the tangle of limbs and lips becoming second nature in no time.

Before, when you were kissing in the pool, you were careful to avoid the teeth accidentally clanking together or the accidental tongue slip, afraid of ruining the sweet moment you were sharing, but all caution was thrown to the wind this time. You were both so desperate to be near one another that you welcomed every imperfection. In fact, it's like they weren't even imperfections at all.

At one point, you all but grinded your lower half into him, warmth flooding there, now, too.

And it seemed he was feeling the same...

You could tell he wanted to pull back, to explain himself, but you didn't care. You wanted it just as badly, so you did the only thing that felt natural and shifted, straddling his waist and deepening your kiss.

In no time, he gathered your hair in his hands, sweeping it away from your face and tucking it behind your ear as you slowly moved your hips. The groan he let slip was just about the most delicious sound you'd ever heard, the grandest thing you'd ever felt, and you wanted to hear it again, over and over until your last breath.

And then you felt him grow harder underneath you, and the mere implications of that sent you into a tailspin.

"Y/N," Spencer said softly, and you paused, leaning back a little and combing through his hair with your fingers. It was still damp from the shower.

"Do... Do you not want to?" you asked sweetly. "We don't... we don't have to tonight. O—or at all, if you don't want to."

"Oh, no I do, it's... just that I didn't know if you wanted to. And I don't... have a whole lot of experience with sex, a—and I didn't want to... I don't know, be bad."

With a small laugh, you leaned down and kissed his cheek. "I'm with you, Spencer Reid. Nothing could ever be bad."

"You're just saying that," he said, though you could hear the smile in his voice.

"I mean it. You make me feel safe, and I... I trust you."

He kissed you then, gently one second and then hungrily the next, and it was all too much to bear. So you grabbed his face and kissed him back, as hard as you could, and he matched your energy by lightly bucking his hips up towards you. The feeling sent a shockwave through you, and even elicited a whine from the back of your throat.

The two of you kept at that for a good five minutes or so before you decided it was, again, all too much. You pulled away from him and sat up, still straddling his hips. And while looking down at him, seeing him breathe as steadily as he could, you brought your hands to the hem of your shirt and slowly yanked it over your head, revealing yourself to him and welcoming the warmth that bloomed through you at his reaction.

His eyes widened and his breathing faltered, and even though it was dim, you could have sworn you'd seen a pink tint paint his cheeks.

"Touch me," you whispered suddenly, the urgency surprising even yourself. Without hesitation, Spencer reached out as far as he could and gripped your bare waist. His thumbs swiped gently up the front of your stomach, and then you leaned down a bit, giving him full access.

The second his hands brushed over your bare chest, you sighed out, small pricks of pleasure beaming through your whole body. Your hands reached down to anchor yourself, landing on his chest and gripping his shirt. He kneaded your breasts first, feeling them out and getting used to how they weighed in his hands, and then he slid them over, brushing the pads of his thumbs over your nipples.

You leaned down and kissed him then, gripping his shirt and lifting it until he understood what you were trying to do.

Both of your clothes came off one by one, and by the time you were both fully naked, time seemed to slow. You both marveled at each other, pressed soft kisses to each inch of bare skin, and inevitably prepared for what you both wanted most.

He slipped on a condom, fumbling an explanation of how Morgan gave it to him after the case in LA, and you laughed, promising to give him a piece of your mind later.

And then, you wrapped yourself around him once more. Only, rather than in the pool, he was sitting up in the bed, leaning against the headboard while your arms rested on his shoulders and your legs clung to his waist.

You sunk onto him slowly, gasping out at how full he made you feel. Every millimeter deeper was slowly splitting you from the inside out, and it was... God, it was everything. Especially as he wrapped his arms around your back, making those comforting circles with his thumbs again, and whispering, "I've got you," over and over again.

By the time he was as deep inside you as he could be, you were breathing into his neck, kissing him there and trying to catch your breath. It had been so long since the last time you'd done this, and now that it was happening, and with Spencer of all people, you were overwhelmed in the best way possible.

Once you were ready, you started moving, slowly lifting your hips and bringing them back down. Until, eventually, you found a slow, searing rhythm that had you panting against his skin.

A low groan left his throat when you clenched around him, and it spurred you on. With another tight squeeze, you quickened your pace just a little, and everything was starting to build.

"Y/N... Y/N, fuck..."

His words were few and far between, but they were laced with just the right amount of wonderment and desire, sending another swarm of butterflies all throughout your entire body.

"Say it again," you breathed desperately in his ear, gripping his shoulders as you clenched around him again. "Say my name, please..."

And he did. It was the sweetest thing you'd ever heard, better than your favorite song, and the only thing you wanted to hear for the rest of your life. He said it again and again, thrown into a mix of expletives and little whimpers that all meshed together to form your new favorite song.

You reciprocated, whimpering out his name when his hips lifted in time with yours, hitting something deeper within you that sent you flying into your own world.

"Kiss me," he pleaded, his hands pressing so firmly into your back you thought they'd leave handprints.

It was a plea you wouldn't deny even if you were able. You kissed him deeply, gladly welcoming the soft push of his tongue against yours and the little sounds he offered. You returned each and every one of them as your body knotted, that imminent feeling of tension starting to rise within every part of you.

He must have felt it, too, because one of his hands reached over and slid in between your bodies, looking for and then finding your clit. His middle finger made easy circles that brought you closer and closer until you snapped, tightening around him—your arms and your legs included.

You cried out against his mouth, and he breathed a final, "I've got you, baby," that shattered your world as you shattered around him. He fell closely behind, and you relished the feeling of him tensing and twitching inside of you.

As your heartbeats slowed, and your breathing right along with it, you slumped against him, your foreheads resting gently against one another. He kissed you sweetly, and you returned it, feeling yourself become more at ease the longer you stayed there.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly, still catching his breath. "Can you move?"

Recalling the moment in the pool earlier, you laughed a little, nudging his nose with yours and promptly answering, "I can. But I don't want to."

With a smile, Spencer hugged you closer and let you rest your head in the crook of his neck.

"Then don't."

TAGLIST:  @elldell1204 @muffin-cup @calm-and-doctor @slutforthegubes @takeyourleap-of-faith (I’m sorry I keep forgetting to add the taglist to all my stuff, I’m still kinda new at this lol. That being said, if you’d like to be added, shoot me a message or comment here and I’ll add you 😂❤)

[smutsonian]

the mobster’s little girl

pairing: mob!steve rogers x reader

summary: what happens when the big bad mobster gets blackmailed by your father to marry you? (kind of fluffy kind of not. kinda dark kinda not.)

warnings: smut, violence, death, obsessive behavior kind of, poorly written smut (for real i skipped some), innocent reader (kind of?), lil bit of angst, drowning, accidents in the kitchen, reader getting burned, not proofread, a lot of mistakes for sure (It’s a long fic and im too lazy to find the mistakes), loss of virginity skskks, oral deed (f & m), fingering skksks, kind of a handie, please let me know if i skipped some, please read at your own risk, rumlow is a warning periodt, this has crack vibes i swear idk what i was typing at some point, ddlg? (is this ddlg? jesus fuck idek anymore), dub-con but like not really?, the POV gets fucked up towards the end so goodluck with understanding this piece of sheeet

word count: 11k (what da actual fuck? this is loooong)

a/n: df am i being awkward while writing them warnings for? Holy shit that’s a long list of warnings

big thanks to @buckys-forgotten-plum​ for helping me edit <3 luv u mwah

this is a combined request of a mob!steve x innocent!reader + steve teaching reader to suck his ding-a-ding-dong

this has a sucky ending. i hate the fucking ending. 

also, i don’t got no clue on how to do spacing on tumblr so im terribly sorry for that.

masterlist

Maybe it’s because they were terrified. Maybe it’s because they know what’s out there and what evil lurks in every corner of the city. Whatever the reason is, her parents hid her from the outside world. Never was she able to step another foot out of the gates of her home. No matter how huge the mansion her parents keep her in, it still feels small and lonely. Instead of the friends that she should’ve made in kindergarten, she became friends with her parents’ employees. Instead of the high school friends that she was supposed to have, she has the few cleaners in the house. She didn’t feel like they work for her because they’ve become her friends that keep her sane for being in one place for her whole life. Being able to go somewhere that’s not the garden, the gazebo, or even the lake that became her favorite place has always been in her mind but never her heart never really demanded to go out. She gets curious at times but it’s not enough to make her go against her parents’ number one rule.

 “Never let yourself be known and never talk to anyone outside this house. If possible, keep yourself away from the entrance gates.”

Being the obedient daughter you are, you followed that rule without question. You became the daughter that your parents wanted you to be. You learned everything from your tutor. The basics of economics but mostly proper etiquette. You didn’t know why you had to learn those but you did what your parents wanted you to do without question. You always do…

 That’s why when your parents told you that you were to marry, you agreed with a little bit of hesitance. “It’s for the best, princess.” Is the only thing that your father said while your mom looked at you with a small smile. You thought that it was going to be like the ones in the movies. You imagined a magical wedding but you didn’t even have one. You were told to sign some papers and just like that, you’re married to some man you don’t even know. A man that you didn’t see until a few days after the signing of papers.

  Steve never felt so disrespected in his entire life. He’s so used to being the powerful man of the city, the country even, that never did he expect some feeble man to come barreling into his business. The Y/L/Ns… He knew of them but he knew little about them. The family is so secretive but are known to be powerful. Nobody knows how they do it but now he has been graced to learn how.

Blackmail… Along with bribery. How fucking pathetic.

He didn’t know how the man managed to acquire his plans for a rival gang but somehow, the fucker did. The rival gang that he was trying to take down for so long and managed to make a plan of action until this fucker messed everything up. The bastard wanted to marry his daughter off to him for a powerful alliance. Saying something about how both of their names would benefit from the marriage. The bastard also promised a fat amount of money that he’ll receive once he marries his daughter. The bastard knew that money has always been a problem for him by the smug look on his face. 

“It’s simple. You provide us security, we give you money. We seal the deal once you sign the papers to be my daughter’s husband.” The old fucker says with such pride in his voice. Steve gritted his teeth before making a move to toss the man out but the fucker clicks his tongue at him. “Ahh, we also wouldn’t want Rumlow to know about your plans on attacking his turf a fortnight from now, do we?” The old fuck stares at him as he waits for his answer.

 Having no other choice, Steve says yes with flared nostrils. He glares at the way the man smiles giddily while walking towards the door. Before the old man could leave, he turned back towards Steve with a serious look before pointing a finger at him. “One more thing… My daughter will be your wife but you are not to touch her. You live at the mansion with her but you ain’t allowed to touch her. Do get out of her way as much as you can. You get all the money you want by following my orders. That easy. Nice dealing with you.” The man was out the door in an instant as Steve glared at the closed door before picking up a wine glass from his desk and throwing it against the door.

   “It’s a bit weird, mother.” Is your reply when your mother came to visit you in your room and asked you about how you’re feeling given your situation. She continues to brush your hair with her fingers as she hums in response.

 “It’s not like the ones in movies, that’s for sure.” You joke, earning a chuckle from your mother.

“My situation… It’s not really normal, correct?” You pull away from your mother’s hands and turn to look at her. She lets out a sigh before turning you back around and resuming to play with your hair. “No…” She says. “We might have been a bit strict with you but we only did it for your safety. The world out there… It’s not safe.” She continues. Once again, you pull away from your mother to fully give your attention to her. “But you and father are always out there. You put yourselves in danger on the daily so why can’t I?” You look at your mother who was looking at you with an unamused expression. You let out a sigh before sighing. “I know... I know. It sounds a bit silly to ask myself to be put in danger… But what about marrying me off to some stranger! You told me that father is bringing him here after he signed the papers. He’s to live here with all of us. Mother, we don’t even know him. Why would you let a stranger into our home?” You reason out, making exaggerated hand gestures to back yourself up. When your mother makes no effort to respond to you, you retort with a scoff and an eye roll. 

“You’re so hell-bent on keeping me inside this place, claiming that it’s to protect me that you failed to realize that you’re putting all of us in danger by letting an unknown man live with us. Seems kind of idiotic to me.” 

 *SLAP*

 You look at your mother with wide eyes as you hold your left cheek as it is stinging in pain. “I-I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. That was disrespectful of me. I’m sorry.” You scrambled to get away from your mother, ignoring her calls as you left your room to run down the long hallway and down the flight of circular stairs. You went out of the mansion and started running down a pathway towards the lake. You were so upset and focused on getting to your destination that you didn’t see a strange man coming out of a black SUV just as you walked out of the mansion.

 You ran down the wooden dock, frowning at what you had said to your mother. You couldn’t believe how you acted just now. First, you disrespect your mother. Now, you hide yourself away like a child that got reproved for the first time. You clicked your tongue in annoyance, an action that you got from your father, as you paced around the wooden dock. “Of course, they were just trying to protect you, you stupid idiot.” You hit your forehead with your palms over and over before tilting your head backward to stare at the sky, not caring at how your eyes hurt at the blinding sun. 

 You closed your eyes after a few seconds, sighing out as you figured that you should probably go back. Your so-called husband was supposed to arrive today. You start to walk back when your foot slipped and suddenly, water enveloped your body. 

 You fell into the lake.

 You would think that being locked up in a big mansion would give you a lot of time to learn how to swim but with your luck, no one ever thought you how so now you couldn’t do anything but drown.

 Your arms flopped around you as you kicked your legs all over the place just to get some air down your lungs but you only found yourself sinking further down. You couldn’t even scream for help because you know that if you did, you would only be swallowing a whole lot of water. 

 Before you could lose your breath entirely, something grasped your flailing hand. You would’ve screamed if you weren’t pulled out of the water. Turned out, it was a hand. Not some kind of creature from the fantasy movies you’ve watched.

 You were sitting on the wooden dock, gasping for air when the sound of an annoyed huff caught your attention. You tilt your head up to see a man looking down at you with an annoyed expression. Your brain started clicking and then it hit you. He must be your husband.

 “You’re here early.” You whisper, looking down. You weren’t sure how to act around him. Around your husband. You would base it on the movies you’ve watched but so far, those movies were nothing like your life. You were sure that if you tried to act like one of the characters there, you would look like a complete buffoon. 

 “So glad to know that I’m married to a dumbass.” He cuts your thoughts off with a sneer. 

 “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall and drown like that.” You remember the lessons you had. About not engaging in someone else’s hostility. You looked down in embarrassment. You’ve never been called something vile like that so you must’ve made him really upset. He scoffs before shaking his head and leaving you on the wooden floor as he walks away.

After that encounter with your so-called husband, you never really saw him again, even though the two of you were living in the same house. It was a few weeks after the drowning incident and you made sure to not tell anyone about it and you only hoped that Steve (you had to learn his name from your mother) didn’t tell anyone about it either. You and your mother are in good terms again and she’s currently in your room again, telling you how she and your father are to spend a few months in Prague to deal with a few business hiccups. You didn’t bother to ask if you could come with but you did bother to complain about them leaving. “You’re leaving me alone with a stranger under the same roof as me?” You exaggeratedly widened your eyes at your mother. “Oh, stop it. I’ve gotten to know Steve myself. I’m sure you’ll be safe with him. He seems like a nice guy. Although, I think your father gets a little bit on his nerves.” Your mother giggles to herself and you look at her with an amused grin. “You’re closer to my husband than I am with him.” You joked which earned a sympathetic look from your mother.

 “Talk to him. He’s your husband after all.” She caresses your face. You hold her wrist as you push your cheeks towards her hold. “I’m pretty sure he hates me, mother. I have a feeling that he’s scrupulously avoiding me.” 

 “How about you bake him something, hmm? You’re wonderful at baking!” Your mother grins at your excited reaction to the mention of baking.

 “I do love to bake…” You hummed in thought before giving your mother a faux pointed look. “Alright, I will bake but only because I love to bake. So if he doesn’t want to socialize with me, then so be it. I wouldn’t care.” You huff proudly as your mother looked at you with a grin and a hint of playfulness in her eyes.

 “What is it?” You ask her.

 “Why do I get the feeling that you want to impress Steve?” She chuckles at your stunned expression.

 “You have completely lost your mind, mother. Haven’t you got a plane to catch? Go on. Say hello to Prague for me!” You push her out of your room, her laughing at your antics before placing a kiss on your forehead and leaving you to yourself.

  “Ooof!” You hissed as your finger touched the hot tray when you were pulling it out of the oven. You were making the third batch of cookies and somehow, you managed to burn your finger now. You quickly pulled the mittens off before putting the hot finger into your lips, as if sucking the pain away is possible. 

 You heard footsteps coming over and when you turned your head, you saw Steve looking at you with something you couldn’t comprehend. “H-hey.” You pulled your finger out of your mouth before hiding it behind your back like a kid. You tiptoed over the counter to reach the plate of cookies before walking over to him. “I made cookies. Would you… like to try some?” You moved the plate closer to his face but he only scowled at you before taking your right wrist and surveying your hand. He found the finger you were sucking on earlier and muttered something under his breath. You thought you heard him say ‘dumbass’ again like the last time.

 “Put cream on it.” He grumbled before leaving the kitchen. You glared at his back until he turned back around, making you wipe the glare out of your face before smiling bitterly at him. He walked towards you with a dark look until he was inches away from you. The position you two are currently in made you realize how tall he is. How he’s towering over you and how his biceps are poking out of his shirt. His crystal blue eyes are staring deep into your soul and you were almost hypnotized by it. You gulped in nervousness. You remember all the things you told your mother about this certain stranger that could possibly be a danger to you until he smirked and took the plate of cookies from the table before walking out once more, leaving you gaping at the door in confusion as your heart was beating faster than normal. From fear or something else, you do not know.

 ----

 Steve was deep in thought as he chewed on the cookies she made. It was really delicious and he hated that he liked it. He did his best to avoid the girl. He’s trying his best to avoid the girl. He did his best to hate the girl so things would be easier for him. He’s trying his best to hate the girl. He didn’t have time to babysit her. Her father is not someone he wanted to have ties with but he is. Steve didn’t want anything that has to do with that man and that includes her.

 But why is it so hard for him to keep her out of his mind?

 The first time he saw her, she had that cute little frown on her face but he found his heart skipping a beat at the sadness in her eyes. He knew he would regret following her but then he didn’t. He saw her as she fell down the dock and he didn’t know why he felt like his world stopped when he saw her gasping for air but it did. It took him his best efforts not to just dive into the lake to save her. Instead, he took her flailing hands and easily pulled her out of the waters. He wanted to keep her warm when he saw her shivering on the wooden floor but he suddenly remembered the deal. His worry was quickly converted into anger and annoyance so he managed to leave her alone, something heavy in his chest as he walked away from her.

 He hated the way she made him feel so he avoided her like a plague. Their home was big and avoiding her was really easy. It was stopping himself from going near her is the hard part. Her mother is the total opposite of her father. Her mother is a nice woman and living with the Y/L/Ns didn’t feel like a job other than her horrid father. Steve got to learn more about her through her mother. She talked about her so dearly. Steve felt his heart fall at the mention of her not leaving the mansion. It sounded like she was an animal caged in better surroundings. Steve realized why she acted so differently when he’s watching her. She seemed so… innocent. 

 Then he caught her baking cookies. It took him his best not to run towards her when he heard her hiss in pain. He watched as she tried to hide her injury from him. He didn’t know if he found it cute or annoying because she shouldn’t hide injuries from him. From anyone. If she was injured, she should get it to check as soon as possible. Then she offered him cookies. Steve swore that his heart leaped in adoration but he took the offered plate in front of him as a chance to check on her hand. He observed her fingers, internally flinching as he saw the burnt area on her index finger. “Such a clumsy little girl…” He muttered under his breath. Steve caught himself though. Why was he so worried about her? He quickly composed himself and dropped her hand. Before turning to leave. He heard her huff and he couldn’t help but to chuckle at that. He turned around to see her frowning at him only to have her eyes widened in surprise. She gave him a stubborn smile as he walked over to her, teasing her and testing her to see where her cuteness could go. Where her STUBBORNNESS could go. Did he really just say cute? 

 When he thought she had had enough, he smirked and took the plate of cookies before leaving.

 The plate of cookies that he’s currently munching on. 

 The more Steve thinks about it, the more he’s realizing that he couldn’t keep her out of his mind. It was impossible.

 The more he sees her, the more he wants to be with her. The more he sees her, the more he wants to protect her because it seems like she has a way of putting herself in danger.

 So innocent.

 So pure.

 He wanted her and he didn’t know if he could control himself anymore.

  A week has passed and things with your husband seemed to have gotten better, if one is optimistically speaking. 

 He no longer avoided you so that’s better than before. He doesn’t acknowledge you much though. He only speaks to you to correct your every move. Called you out when you were walking barefoot around the mansion, mocked you when you walked around the docks, and even demanded you to leave the kitchens alone because according to him, you don’t know how to properly use it.

 He only ever opened his mouth to speak his mind of his distaste towards you and you were starting to miss the times when he completely avoided you.

 But you ignored the insults and kept your head high up. You aren’t going to sulk. Especially not when someone’s clearly made it his goal to make you feel just that.

 That’s why you’re currently making pasta. Ignoring his demand and continuing on having adventures in the kitchen. You just finished making the sauce so now you just have to cook the pasta. You took a pot that was way bigger than your head and proceeded to fill it with water from the sink.

 You struggled to carry it over to the stove, letting out a relieved sigh once you managed to set it down. The problem though, the bottom of the pot somehow got stuck on the burner plate. You clicked your tongue in annoyance before grunting and attempting to pull on the heavy pot. It remained stuck so you exerted more effort, succeeding but managing to tilt the pot towards yourself. You let out a yelp as the cold water inside the pot spills all over you. 

 “Y/N!”

 You felt his hands before you heard his voice.

 ——

 Steve heard clanking noises from the kitchen and he just had to roll his eyes at the thought of her prancing around the kitchen. Didn’t he tell her to leave the kitchen alone? He’s just trying to stray her from the harm she could put herself in. Not that he would ever admit that out loud.

 He walked into the kitchen, just in time to see water spill over her from the boiling pot. His blood went cold as he felt his heart stopping. “Y/N!” He rushed over her knelt body, covered in water. He cautiously touched her face, being careful not to hurt her possibly burnt skin. Why can’t she just listen to him? He told her not to work in the kitchen for a reason. 

 As he touched her seemingly cold cheeks, he watched as she looked up at him with an innocent confused look. “Steve?” Her voice was so meek yet it made his ear start to ring as his heart started to beat back to life. She must’ve seen his frantic expression because her eyes widened in realization before she’s shaking her head and pointing at the fallen pot. “I haven’t boiled the water yet! See? I’m fine. I didn’t burn myself.” She had the audacity to smile cheekily at him and he didn’t know if he should be leaping in joy with her or reprimanding her for being so careless.

 Steve clicked his tongue at her, something that he must’ve picked up from her, before leaving the kitchen with a huff. Something that he’s been doing a lot whenever he’s with her.

 ——

 After he left, you took a seat on one of the chairs, recalling what just happened a few moments ago. He thought you were stupid enough to pour boiling water all over yourself. Does he really think you’re that stupid? He looked so worried though. You smiled at the thought of him possibly caring about you. 

 You let out a short squeak when you felt something falling at the top of your head. A towel. Steve wrapped it around you until your head was the only part exposed. “Whatcha grinning on about, little girl?” His voice was stern but there was a teasing tone in it. You looked up at him as he watched you. You shook your head before furrowing your eyebrows when he bought the pot towards the sink, filling it with water.

 “What are you doing?” Your voice is small as you asked him.

 “Can’t trust you with this. You might boil yourself the next time you even try.” He clicked his tongue before effortlessly bringing the pot to the stove and lighting it up. After that he walked back towards you and sat at the chair beside you, turning himself to stare back at you.

 “I thought I made it clear when I told you not to work in the kitchens?” He mockingly tilted his head before raising one eyebrow at you. You stared back at him, not knowing what to say so you just tilted your head down like a chided kid. 

 “Uh uh uh…” You felt his long fingers under your chin as he tilted your head back to face him. “What’s the matter? Did you manage to burn your tongue as well? Hmm?” You didn’t know why but the way he was talking to you is making you feel something unfamiliar in your stomach.

 When you didn’t answer, he put the hand that was on your chin to the side of your mouth, his thumb brushing over your bottom lip. Your eyes fluttered when he managed to poke his thumb into your mouth and pressed it down your tongue gently.

 “Seems pretty alright for me…” He mumbles. You watched as his eyes widened in surprise when you sucked on his thumb absentmindedly. You realized what you were doing and stopped immediately. “No. No, don’t stop. Do it again.” He watched you with bright eyes as you hesitantly sucked on his thumb once more, feeling your body warming up at the current situation. 

 He slowly pulls his thumb out before rubbing it around your lips and leaning his face closer to yours. You could feel your heart panicking in fright or in excitement, you weren’t sure. You saw him close his eyes before he let out a sigh. He pulls away from you then ruffles the towel on your head. “Why don’t you go ahead and put dry clothes on? I think the pasta’s ready.” He grins before walking back toward the stove to start preparing the meal.

 You stumbled to your feet, mindlessly walking towards your room with a clouded mind.

 What was that all about?

  All Steve could ever think about was her. Her beautiful lips. Her eyes that glisten with innocence. Her nose twitches whenever she’s focused on something. The way she fits in his hold. The way she reacts under his touch. 

 He couldn’t forget about the way she sucked on his thumb unknowingly and the way her eyes became hooded from his touch. It’s obvious that she had no idea what was happening and what she was feeling and that only fueled his hunger more.

 The thought of her being hurt made him furious. It made him protective. He wants to protect her at all costs because not even the ends of her hair should get hurt. No. Not on his watch.

 Steve couldn’t take her out of her mind even if he wanted to. That’s the problem. He doesn’t want her out of his mind anymore. He doesn’t want to avoid her anymore.

 Steve accepted it. 

 He knows that he wants her and he knows that she’ll be able to have him wrapped around her precious little finger if she wants to. 

 He realized how she has a tight hold over him without even knowing it and he’s accepted that fact. 

 He’s ready to do everything for the girl and she doesn’t even know it. He’s ready to give her everything he has and everything he is. 

 He’s ready to give himself completely to her. Of course, it is if she’ll have him.

  After that encounter with Steve, you finally followed his instruction and stopped trying to make various meals in the kitchen. 

 You were craving cake so you asked one of the cooks to bake you a cake. That’s why there’s a whole cute pink cake in front of you at the kitchen counter. 

 You’re currently staring at it, thinking it’s too precious to destroy and eat but after a minute of your mouth watering, you give up and run your index finger on the sides until it is covered in icing.

 You licked your finger before sucking on it and humming at the sweet taste of the icing while your eyes are closed. When there is none left on your finger, you take your index and middle finger before sliding it on the sides of the cake to gather twice as much as the previous one.

 Your eyes are closed and lips parted slightly apart, ready to suck on your fingers one more time when a hand grips your wrist. Your eyes fly open to see Steve holding your hand while he’s looking down at your face with a boyish grin. Your eyes widened for the second time when his tongue darted out of his mouth and started licking the icing off your fingers.

 He was staring at you as he continued to lick the icing and you were starting to pull away when his lips parted wider to start sucking on your fingers. You’re frozen in shock as your eyes twitched at the sight of him sucking on your fingers. 

 You feel your heart drop when he starts groaning against your fingers. The unfamiliar feeling in your stomach made itself known again and you bit your bottom lip anxiously at the strange feelings you always get whenever Steve’s with you. 

 Your eyes follow Steve’s lips as he pulls your fingers out of his mouth with a silent pop. He looks at you with a smile before furrowing his brows. “Did you bake this?”

 “N-no! I had someone to bake it for me.” You’re quick to let him know that you didn’t make the cake. He smiled again and you just realize how giddy you feel when you’re able to make him smile like that. 

 “Really? So you finally listened to me?” He chuckles when he sees you nod shyly at him. “Aren’t you a good little girl.” He cooes before looking at the cake with a smirk. “This cake is really delicious…” He leans back to stand straight and you nodded at him in agreement. “I wonder…” 

 You let out a loud squeal when he suddenly puts his hands under your arms before pulling you up and sitting you down on the counter. You look at him with a stunned expression. “Wha—“ 

 “But I bet you taste better than this cake.” You couldn’t respond because he immediately connects his lips with yours, making your eyes pop out in shock as he continues to attack your mouth. You let out a small whimper when you feel his tongue pushing past your lips and roaming around the inside of your mouth, tickling the roof of your mouth.

 You start chuckling against his lips and he stops, looking at you in confusion. “You’re tickling me…” You point at the top of your mouth and Steve’s frown turned into a grin. His hand found their ways on the top of your knees and then he’s pushing them apart. “I know a place where I can tickle you... I’m sure you’ll like it.” He pulls you closer to him so you slide against the counter. He carefully pushes your shoulders until your back is laying on the cold kitchen counter. You feel him hiking your skirt up and pulling your underwear down before he sets your feet back on the counter, knees bent, and far apart. 

 You could feel him breathing against your skin and you could feel your body running hot while the hairs on your body stand in attention. You feel something wet run against your skin and you yelp as you sit on your elbows, looking at Steve alarmingly. His face was just in front of your core and tongue is just retreating your skin. 

 “Wh-what are you doing, Steve?” You bite your lip as you watch him stand up until he’s face to face with you. “I’m trying to make you feel good, baby. Do you trust me?” He presses his lips against yours and pulls away, waiting for your answer.

 “I don’t know…” You admit, stomach dropping at the sadness that flashes over his face.

 “Then let me show you that you can trust me. Can you let me do that?” He looks at you and smiles when you nod at him. He presses his lips on you once more, pushing you against the kiss until your back is back on the counter. He pulls away, pecking you one last time before going back to press kisses in between your legs.

 He licks up your skin, hands pressing down on your hips when you begin squirming around. You feel his mouth sucking on the bud before flicking his tongue over it. He doesn’t stop until you’re whining under him, unsure if you want him to stop or to do something else.

 “What do you want, little girl?” He breathes against your core, making your legs shiver at the sensation. 

 “I don’t know…” You whine, eyes staring at him as he stands over your body. He raises his right hand, fingers fluttering in display as he gives you a questioning look. “You want me to use this on you?” You could only nod in desperation because the feeling of emptiness when he pulled away from you is becoming too much.

 “Good girl.” You hear him whisper before going back in between your legs. You feel his fingers playing with your bud instead of his tongue and it feels overwhelming when he uses his tongue to press it against your entrance. 

 “Mmmhm” You close your eyes in delight as he continues to play with you. The familiar feeling in your abdomen makes itself known once again and this time, it’s stronger. You need more.

 “P-please…” You mutter under your breath, pulling on Steve’s hair to catch his attention. He looks at you with a proud smile before asking. “What is it? You need more? Want me to put my finger inside you, is that it?” 

 ——

 Steve smiles when she nods her head eagerly. So innocent, can’t even tell him what she wants. What she needs.

 He rubs on her clit a few more times to wet his fingers before lining a finger against her slit. He looks back at her as he starts pushing the finger in, slowing down when her hand grips her arm. 

 Steve groans at the tightness of her walls against his finger and starts to slowly pump it as he watches her face contort into a pleasured frown. When he feels her loosening up, he adds another finger that earns a low moan from her. Steve stiffens for a second when he feels his pants getting tighter in the crotch area. His cock is begging him for attention but he pays no mind, focusing on the angel in front of him.

 He spreads his fingers apart inside of her as he leans down to start flicking his tongue against her clit, smirking against it when her thighs shiver against his head. He feels her breaths starting to become uneven and he knows that she’s just about to cum so he doubles his effort, sucking her clit harshly and curling his fingers inside of her.

 Her back arches off the counter and Steve hooks an arm under her to pull her up and press her against his chest. She shakes against his hold as he helps her get through her high. She slumps against his hold, head falling down the side of his neck. 

 Steve tilts his head to look at her face, eyes hooded and forehead sweating. She looks so adorable like this. “That cake gave us such a rush, huh?” He chuckles before hooking her legs around his torso and hugging her body close to his. He feels her dozing off as he carries her to her bedroom. 

 He lays you down on the bed and tucks you under your blanket before studying your face. So peaceful. So relaxed. A smile forms on your face and Steve finds himself smiling as well.

 “Goodnight, my sweet little girl.” He presses a kiss on your forehead before walking out of your room. 

  It’s currently four in the afternoon and Steve is currently sitting on a couch in the massive living room, thinking about the night he has planned for him and his little girl. 

 After that time in the kitchen, things have been great with them. It’s been a few months and he became someone he didn’t know he could be and it was all for her. He wants nothing but the best for his girl. He gives her the ‘special treatment’ or ‘reward’ whenever she asks for it. She’ll do something nice for him to receive his special kisses but Steve knew that he’ll give her anything without her working for it. He just likes the attention he gets from her when she gets a little needy.

 Steve feels his crotch stirring under his pants at the thought of eating his little girl out. He always eats her out and makes her putty with his fingers but his cock remains abandoned. 

 He didn’t think she was ready. He didn’t want to scare his girl. He’ll wait as long as he needs until his little girl’s ready for him. For the time being, he’ll make sure to keep his little girl happy and satisfied.

 Steve’s thoughts were cut off when his little girl walked in front of him with a weird look on her face, a phone held against her right ear. He sits up in attention, his body becoming alert at the way her face scrunches up in fear as she looks at him.

 “What’s wrong, little girl?” His voice is a whisper but his tone is hard. 

 She looks at him with a frown before handing him the phone. He looks at it and listens to her as she speaks.

 “Father called… Which is weird because he never calls when they’re on a trip. Let alone a business trip. He told me that the trip would be a few months and I didn’t think they would be in some kind of situation after being gone for almost seven months… They’re usually gone longer than that. But then that guy—” She points at the phone in Steve’s hand before continuing her explanation.

 “—That guy took the phone away from my father when he’s explaining something to me about telling something to you, Steve. His name is Rumlow and he’s got a very foul mouth—” He watches as her nose scrunches up, probably at the memory of the man’s words on the phone but Steve didn’t care about that. He’s worried about Rumlow talking to you. Through your father’s phone at that!

 Steve presses the phone against his ear before asking who’s on the other line.

 “Ahh, Rogers… Where’s the little brat? I thought she’s enjoying the things I’m promising her. Told her about how my cock will make her cunt cry—” Steve feels his blood boiling at the way Rumlow is talking about his little girl.

 “What are you on about, Rumlow? What are you doing with that phone?” Steve cuts Rumlow off, voice so harsh that he sees her flinching at his tone. He smiles at her before ushering her back to her room.

 “You see… Your girl is supposed to be mine. I saw her first but imagine the surprise I got when I ask her dear daddy for her hand and he tells me that she’s married to a Steve fucking Rogers.” Steve hears Rumlow’s bitter laugh before hearing her little girl’s father groan in pain, no doubt that he took a blow from Rumlow.

 “I just want a simple deal here, Rogers. I’ll text the address and I expect to have the girl and a bag filled with… I don’t know, ten million dollars? If you’re too broke then just bring the girl. I’m sure she’ll make the lack of ten million with her pretty little cunt.” Rumlows cackle was heard along with the cries of your parents. He must’ve held them as hostages. 

 “Do that and her parents stay safe. Be here at 9 pm sharp or it’s bye-bye for her lovely parents. Tik-Tok, Rogers. Tik-Tok…” Steve almost crushes the phone into pieces in his hand when Rumlow hangs up on him. Rumlow holds your parents as hostages and dares to speak about you like that. He’ll fucking kill him.

 The phone buzzes and he sees the address Rumlow sent him. They were no longer in Prague. They’re back here...

 Steve makes a move to call his best man, Bucky, when he hears sounds coming from her room. He quickly runs over, throwing her door open to see her shoving a bunch dollar bills into a huge bag while a phone is pressed against her neck and her shoulder. 

 Steve’s heart falls at the sight of tears falling down her face. She must’ve heard everything with the connecting phone lines. He sighs before walking over to his girl and steadying her by holding her shoulders in a firm grip. “Everything will be alright. I’ll call someone to fix the problem. They’ll clear the building, catch the bad guy, and then your parents will be home in no time!” Steve gives her a smile but it doesn’t work. Her face is still wet with tears as she shakes her head in disagreement.

 “No! The b-bad guy will harm my parents if he sees your men without me! I don’t w-want anything bad happening to my family, Steve. I-I don’t want that!” He pulls her against his chest as he sobs and shakes against his hold. Steve runs a comforting hand on her back before sighing in defeat. 

 “Fine. We’ll save your parents but I have to call my friends for backup. And you have to stay as far away from the fighting. I’ll have my best guy, James, be with you the whole time. You can trust him, he’s my best friend. You need to stick with him because he’ll keep you safe, got it?” He gives her a firm yet gentle look, jaw clenching when she nodded eagerly at him before continuing to fill the bag with cash. 

 He makes his calls and in no time, they’re driving towards the address Rumlow sent him.

  Steve parks the car a few miles away from the building where her parents are being held as hostages. He looks at his little girl who’s currently wearing sweatpants and his hoodie which looks pretty big on her. He smiles at the sight before letting out a shaky breath. 

 “You gotta stay here, okay? I promise that I’ll get your parents out safely. You don’t have to worry about them because I’ll protect them for you, okay? You trust me, little girl?” He watches her as she reluctantly nods her head. He sighs at that before handing her a pistol gun. “You know how to use one?” He asks, surprised to see his little girl nod. She must’ve seen his surprised look because she looks down before explaining, “I had basic shooting lessons.”  He smiles at his little girl before nodding. 

 He gets out of the car before walking around and opening the door for his girl and helping her out. He sees James walking over to them and he nods at his friend in acknowledgment before looking back at his girl. “This is Bucky. He’ll keep you safe. Stick with him, alright?” He watches her girl as she observes his friend with her adorable curious eyes.  

 “The others are already surrounding the building. Backup is also ready. Just say something and they’ll attack. Good luck out there.” He smiles at Bucky’s words before kissing his girl’s forehead.

 “Please stay safe, Steve.” His girl mutters and he feels his heart skip a beat at that moment. “I will. Anything for you, little girl.” He turns to leave, hearing his girl one last time before disappearing. 

 “That’s a nice-looking vest, Mr. Bucky.”

  Everything was going well for Steve. Rumlow’s men are really weak and easy to take down and when Rumlow realized that, he ran. He ran away like the coward he is. He ran out of the building and that was that. At least, that’s what Steve thought. 

 He was able to see her parents and he quickly untied them, her mother thanking him endlessly while her father only grumbled his thanks once. 

 He was guiding the couple out of the building, surprised to see his little girl standing a few miles away from them with Bucky. He sees her eyes brighten in relief that made all his worries disappear. 

 He was walking with her parents when he heard the cocking of a gun beside his head. 

 “Not so fast.” A raspy voice speaks beside him.

 Rumlow…

 Before Steve could even move, a bang was heard. Followed by another bang that has his ears ringing in pain. He closes his eyes to ease the aching in his head or his body. Was he shot? 

 His eyes fly open when he remembers that his girl is also out in the open and his eyes quickly darts over towards her.

 To his surprise, his girl is holding the gun he gave her earlier in his direction. 

 Steve quickly scans the couple near him for injuries when he hears someone groaning below him. He finds Rumlow laying on his back, legs bleeding while his arms are spread out. 

 He looks back at his girl, a sense of pride filling his system. His girl just did that. 

 He watches as his girl runs towards him with her arms wide open, ready to envelop him in a hug. 

 Steve grins before he hears Rumlow muttering and everything seems to be moving in slow motion. 

 “If I can’t have her… Then nobody can!” Rumlow spits before a loud bang go out.

 Steve’s eyes grow wide when he sees the bullet piercing through his hoodie and into his girl’s chest. 

 His heart stops when he sees her falling down into Bucky’s arms and onto the cold ground. 

 Her mother’s cries filled Steve’s ringing ears as well as her father’s curses as he tried to console his wife.

 Steve quickly kicks the gun from Rumlow’s hand before kicking the bastard’s face repeatedly until he’s unconscious. He releases all his anger on the bastard who shot his little girl by bending down and throwing punches down the unconscious man. He keeps punching until he sees Bucky carrying his girl towards them. 

 He pulls back from a bleeding Rumlow before running towards Bucky and taking his girl from his best friend. He brushes some stray hair away from her forehead before observing her face. 

 “Call the fucking ambulance!” He barks at nobody but Bucky follows his order, quickly fumbling with his phone and calling their mob doctor. 

 Steve was about to rip his hoodie off his girl when her eyes suddenly flew open, gasping for air. 

 Steve’s heart stops for a second, he doesn’t know if it’s from shock or relief but he’s grateful to see his little girl alive and breathing. He feels her wrap her arms around his neck, burying her face on the side of his neck as she catches her breath. He wraps his arm around her shaking body, gripping her tight and pulling her body against his like he’s afraid that she’ll slip away from his grasp.

 “Mother. Father. I’m so glad you’re okay!” He hears his girl talking to her parents who are currently behind him. He should let her go to reunite with her parents but he doesn’t. He keeps her against his body. 

 “Are you okay, dear?” Her mother asks and he feels his girl nodding against his neck. His girl finally pulls away from him before tugging on the hoodie she’s wearing and pulling it up to reveal a bulletproof vest. 

 Bucky’s laughter fills the air and everyone turns to look at him. “You little genius!” He exclaims before pointing at his little girl. “She kept bothering me about my vest and didn’t stop until I gave her one! Ah... You got yourself a keeper and a smartass, Steve!” He continues to laugh, her parents soon follow Bucky until everyone is laughing as well. 

 Everyone’s laughter is cut off by Rumlow waking up before gasping for air just like you were a few moments ago. 

 He pulls his girl against his chest, blocking her view from Bucky who gets his gun out before pointing it towards Rumlow’s head. 

 Steve covers his girl’s ears before another bang goes out. The last one for the night.

  “I’m really fine, Steve. Dr. Banner said I was fine! No scars and all, see?” You pull your hoodie up to assure him. You watch him stare at your skin, probably looking for scars before he forces your hoodie down with a frown as he bites his lip. 

 “You can’t just pull your shirt up like that. People might see.” His hushed and commanding voice makes you gulp and nod apologetically. 

 You look around as he walks the both of you towards the lake. “But there’s nobody around, Steve.” You whisper, looking down at the dirt as you walk with him. 

 You feel his warm fingers under your chin before your head is tilted up so you’re looking directly up at him. “You really are a smartass, huh?” He smirks, feeling your body warm up against his hold before throwing his arm around your shoulders to continue walking.

 Steve holds you close as the both of you walk down the dock under the darkness of the night. He stops just at the end of the dock before turning to face you. 

 You admire his face, looking so enchanting under the light of the moonlight. “You remember the first time we met?” He asks, grinning at your embarrassed reaction which is you chewing your bottom lip. He caresses your face before running his thumb across your lips, stopping your teeth’s attacks on your lips.

 “How you’re taught to shoot a gun but not how to swim will always be a mystery.” He chuckles, smiling down at you and you watch him as he does just that. He’s just so pretty to look at.

 “You really scared me tonight, little girl…” His sad tone made your eyebrows shoot up in worry. “I-I didn’t mean to, Steve! I’m so sorry.” You frown at yourself but he brushes his fingers on the wrinkles you made between your eyebrows which makes you relax just a bit.

 “I was supposed to be the one protecting you. Not the other way around.” He lets out a sigh before looking at the water. “But thank you. Thank you for doing that. And for trusting me. I know you were a little hesitant with trusting me but you still did. So thank you for that. It means a lot.” Steve looks back at you and smiles. You feel your heart fluttering at his smile but it also breaks at his words. You wanted to tell him that he’s wrong but you are cut off by a bunch of lights.

 You gasp at the lights that start to flicker all around you. You do a slow full 360, looking at the trees that are covered with fairy lights, the side of the docks are covered with lights as well, and the darkness is soon replaced by a whole bunch of lights. Your heart starts to jump when you hear slow music playing in the background and it feels like every time you do a full 360 turn, something new presents itself. 

 Everything seems so magical, so pretty and so… Something straight out of the fairytale movies that you watch. 

 You turn to face Steve again only to find him gone. You frown before looking down to see him down on one knee, a red velvet box in his hand which he holds towards you.

 You feel yourself grinning with so much joy running through your system and you can’t help but to let out a squeal when the velvet box opens to reveal a very pretty diamond ring. 

 “Little girl… Will you make me the happiest man alive by marrying me?” He asks, uncharacteristically shy which makes you giggle. You start giggling more which makes Steve lick his lips as his eyes flash his nervousness. 

 “Steve, you’re so dumb.” You mumble through giggles. 

 “Huh?” Steve slowly stands up, looking at you with sad eyes.

 “We’re already married! We both signed the papers!” You point out the obvious, stopping your giggle fit before kissing him on the lips.

 “Don’t be sad, Steve… I accept your proposal… Even though we’re already married.” You giggle once more before letting him put the ring on you.

 He guides you until the both of you are sitting on the edge of the dock, feet dangling down the water.

 “I just wanted you to have a normal yet magical experience even just for a moment,” Steve whispers after a few minutes of silence.

 “That’s kind of useless.” You automatically say.

 “What? Why?” Steve feels his heart fall at your words. Is he doing this whole thing wrong?

 “I already feel like that whenever I’m with you.” You state, looking at him like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

 Steve feels his heart beat an extra mile but he also feels relieved that he’s indeed doing it right. 

 You grin at the sight of Steve blushing in front of you. You never thought that the man who was so hard on you the first time you met was going to be a blushing mess in front of you right now.

 “Hey, Steve?” Your voice cuts the thin air and he looks at you with a raised eyebrow. “Yeah?”

 “You know how I saved your life earlier…” Steve smiles at your bashful expression that he finds so adorable.

 “Mhmm…” He nonchalantly hums.

 “Well… I was thinking…” You bite your lip in nervousness and embarrassment at the question you’re about to ask him.

 “What is it, little girl?” His voice is matched with a chuckle as he gives you a grin.

 “Can I have a reward for that?” You blurt out.

 Steve feels his cock stir in his pants at her words. He bites his lip before standing up and helping her up as well.

 “I’ll give you everything you want, little girl. It doesn’t have to be a reward. You ask for it, you get it, is that clear?” He gives you a questioning look before smiling when you nod eagerly at him.

 “Now, what is it that you want as a reward?” 

 ————-

He trails kisses from your forehead to your nose, nose to your cheeks, cheeks to your neck. He purposely skips your lips with a grin and starts feasting on your neck. He licks and sucks on a spot he knows too well, earning an adorable squeak from you when he teasingly bites on the skin. “S-Steve!” You gasp, hands going straight to his head, fingers sliding through his soft hair. He continues nipping on your neck until your head tilts back and a quiet moan escapes your lips.

 He pulls away to look at you and then smirks.

 “You want me to give you those special kisses for your rewards?” He cocks a brow before smiling when you nod your head eagerly at him. “Y-yes please.” 

 Steve wastes no time to pleasure you. His little girl.

 He dives for your glistening core and groans in pleasure at your taste. He uses his tongue to stimulate you through your clit, enjoying the way your body shakes under his hold.

 Steve listens to your moans and whimpers like a song and uses it as motivation to keep you a writhing mess under him. “Please, S-Stevie…” He hears you cry under him, reaching your hands towards his hands and pulling it closer to his face as he tongues your clit. 

 Steve chuckles at your needy behavior but complies, not missing the nickname leaving your lips. Anything for his little girl.

 Steve easily enters a finger into your wet core, groaning at your warmness and wetness before adding another finger. He sees your face contorting into a mix of pleasure and pain. Steve leans down to kiss your clit and flicks his tongue faster to distract you from the pain.

 “A-aah” He watches your eyes rolling back when he begins to spread his fingers inside you. Another finger enters and you’re crumbling against his fingers, walls closing around his fingers as you cum undone under him. He pulls away from you before reaching for your face and kissing you hungrily. He smiles against the kiss when he feels you return the kiss with the same hunger.

 He feels you pulling away and he lets you, frowning a little when he sees you looking at him timidly. His hand carefully reaches for your face, knuckles gliding down for cheeks smoothly. “What is it, little girl?” 

 He watches you bite your lip before looking at him with half-lidded eyes. “I w-want to give you special kisses too…” Steve freezes as he feels his cock getting harder than before. He feels your hands reaching for his member, giving him a look before gulping. “C-can you teach me? I want to make you feel good too…” 

 Steve doesn’t know which is beating harder; his cock or his heart, maybe both… Probably both. You do that to him. Only you. His little girl. 

 Steve finds himself gulping as well. “You don’t have to, litt—” 

 “I want to!” You’re quick to cut him off. Almost eager, he notices. He lets out a nervous laugh before nodding. “Okay, okay… I’ll teach you.” He doesn’t miss the way your eyes light up from his approval. He smiles at you before guiding your hands that’s currently holding his hard member.

 “Just do this gently…” He guides your hands up and down his shaft, head going crazy at the sight of your hands not being able to cover his huge cock. He bites his lip, willing himself to hold on and not cum on your hands so early.

 “C-can I kiss it now?” He looks down at you, sitting on the mattress as your innocent eyes look up at him while he stands on the ground. “Go ahead, little girl. Try it.” He encourages you, smiling when you press a quick kiss on his tip. His jaw clenches when you press another kiss, longer this time. 

 Steve’s eyes flutter when he feels your tongue dancing around his tip. You begin to lick along the shaft and then under, making Steve groan wantonly. 

 Steve lets out a frustrated huff when you quickly pull away from him. “I-I’m sorry. I was just doing what you did to me. I-I didn’t mean to hurt you!” Your eyes are teary and Steve realized that his moans made you think that you hurt him.

 He sighs before leaning down to your face, giving you an assuring smile before kissing your nose. “You didn’t do anything wrong, little girl. You’re doing everything right. In fact, you’re doing so great that my friend down there couldn’t help but to go wild under your touch.” He points at his member before grinning at your widened eyes.

 “I’m going to guide you. There’s no reason to be afraid. If you want to stop, just tap me and we will stop. We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, okay?” He waits for your response and lets out a breath of relief when you nod.

 He stands back up, putting your hands on his behind and guiding your face just in front of his cock. “Open wide, little girl.” He sings and grins when you do as told. He holds the back of your head but never pushes you, leaving you to go at your own pace.

 You push yourself forward, taking him halfway before pulling back and pushing yourself back to him. His moans of pleasure push you to do more so you do. You swirl your tongue on his tip as you bob your head, smiling at the loud moan that leaves his lips. 

 “You little tease…” He breathes out, his grip on your head getting tighter but not enough to hurt you. He feels the vibration of your laughter on his cock and he lets out another cry of pleasure.

 Feeling confident with yourself, you push yourself forward until his tip hits the back of your throat, making you gag.

 He helps you as you pull away from him, looking down at you with his flushed face. He studies your face, eyes shadowed with lust, making his heart do somersaults. He wipes the tears on your face before saying, “Breathe through your nose, okay?” He watches you nod and chuckles when you go back for his cock, taking him deep at a slow pace and staying there for a second before pulling slightly away. “That’s my good girl…” He moans as you continue to take him, teasing his tip with your tongue when he suddenly pulls you away from him.

 “Did I—” He cuts you off with a kiss, groaning against your lips and pushing you until you’re lying on your back with him on top of you. “You did great. I just want my cum somewhere else…” He catches your lips when you bite on them, his tongue pushing its way into your mouth.

 He pulls away, guiding your body until he’s kneeling between your thighs, one hand on his cock while the other is on your thigh. “Is this okay?” He asks when he places the tip of his cock on your slit.

 You gingerly nod, whimpering when he slides his cock on your sensitive clit. “P-please…” You have no idea what you’re begging for but he seems to know what he’s doing. 

 “Do you trust me, little girl?” Steve asks, looking at your face with hopeful eyes.

 “Yes, Stevie. I trust you.” Steve’s heart warms up at how fast you answered his question. He nods before sliding a few more teasing thrusts into your folds and clit before slowly sliding his tip into your slit. He stops to look at your face that’s contorted into a frown. He leans down your face to kiss your frown away and kisses your lips as well, hoping to distract you from the pain. 

 Steve pushes his cock deeper when he feels you relax under him. He pushes slowly and stops when he’s fully in, groaning when your walls hug his member tightly. “Fuck!” He hisses before looking at you. “You okay?” He asks, smiling when you nod at him, eyes closed. He kisses your lips before pulling halfway and thrusting into you once more, earning a little whimper from you.

 “How are you feeling, baby?” You try to ignore the nickname, opening your eyes and looking straight at his eyes. “G-good. Please move, Stevie.” You press your palms against his chest. He pulls halfway out before shoving himself inside you again, repeating this action until you’re moaning loudly under him and clutching his biceps for support.

 Steve feels your walls fluttering around him, alarming him that you’re close. He knows he’s close as well so he helps you reach your peak by rubbing your clit with his fingers, groaning at how your walls tighten around him.

 Steve listens to your cries of pleasure as your walls clamp down on his cock as you cum, making him cum as well and milking him. Your body shakes under him and both of you breathe heavily as you try to catch your breath. He falls to your side, his arms enveloping around you to pull you against his chest into a warm and strong embrace.  

 “It’s official. We just consummated our marriage... I’m all yours just as much as you’re all mine.” He stares at your face, watching your eyes as you fight yourself from falling asleep.

 “I fucking love you, little girl.” He lazily says, brushing your face with his fingers. You stare at him sleepily, listening to the beat of his heart.

  “The fuck is he doing?” Your father grumbles as he watches Steve prance around the kitchen.

 “He’s making our daughter breakfast. I think our daughter broke him.” Your mother snickers at the way your father looks at Steve in disbelief. 

 “You tellin’ me that he touched Y/N?!” Your father fumes, getting ready to walk up to the man in the kitchen before your mother stops him.

 “Oh, hunny. Would you stop that? They’re married. And Y/N is an adult. They both are. They can do anything they want. And I can see that Steve really loves our daughter. The way he acted after Y/N got shot. Not to mention the part where he literally saved our asses. Your ass.” Your mother berates your father who just huffs in response before leaving. Your mother chuckles before following her husband, ready to give him a piece of her mind.

  “You made cookies without me?” Steve’s heart flutters as you pout at him. “I want to make cookies too…” You mumble under your breath. You just woke up from your sleep when Steve entered the room with a plate full of cookies.

 “I didn’t want you getting into any accidents, little girl.” Steve chuckles when you take one cookie before grumpily munching on it. He watches as your eyes light up before covering it up with a frown. “Will you stop calling me little girl?”

 “Never.” He simply says. You huff and Steve couldn’t help but to chuckle at your cuteness.

 “Your cookies aren't even that good. I make better cookies.” You mumble before taking another cookie from the plate and munching on it. Steve raises an eyebrow at you before shaking his head. “I know you do, little girl. I know you do.” He smiles at you before making a move to sit beside you. 

 “No! Wait! Stay there.” You point a finger at him before fumbling around the sheets as if looking for something. 

 “You okay?” Steve asks, eyes shooting open when you jump out of the bed to stand in front of him, only the sheets covering your body. You realize this and quickly pull on the hoodie from last night before looking back at Steve with a grin.

 “Hi,” You start, earning a confused look from Steve. “Hello?” He chuckles when you look at him with so much excitement that you’re literally bouncing on your toes.

 “I want to give you something.” 

 “What is it?” Steve watches your fist as you hold it against his face before opening it, revealing a gold ring that looks to be vintage or a hundred years old.

 “Where’d that come from, little girl?” Steve whispers.

 “Can I put it on you? Will you marry me too?” You ignore his question, too excited to listen to anything. Steve laughs before nodding, watching you with adoration as you giddily put the ring on him. 

 “There! So pretty! You’re so pretty, Stevie!” You continue to admire the ring on his finger when he takes your chin with said hand, making you look up at him. 

 “Thank you, little girl.” He leans down to press a kiss on your lips before pulling away with a smile.

 “My father gave it to me.” You blurt out, making Steve’s eye widen just a bit. 

 “Your father?” He asks, not sure about what’s happening.

 “Yes. He came here earlier. Told me that you deserve the ring and that you should never make him regret anything?” Steve listens to you, you obviously don’t know what your father did but it’s enough for Steve to understand.

 “Oh… And Stevie?” He looks at you, smiling and asking you if you need something.

 “I love you too.” You grin at him.

 Steve stares at you for a moment before feeling tears sliding down his cheeks.

 He makes a quick move towards you, pulling you in a tight embrace and pampering your face with kisses.

 “I love you, little girl. Thank you for saying it back.” He mumbles against your hair before pressing a kiss on your lips once more.

 “Stop calling me little girl!” You grumble against him.

 He only chuckles at you before shaking his head. “No. You’ll always be my little girl.”

 ----

a/n: omfg if you finished all that, congratulations you just wasted a whole lot of ur time but thanks for wasting it on me 3;-)

[winryofresembool]

Things We Lost in the Fire, ch 43

aka Caleo uni au

Fic summary: Calypso starts studying at a new university, but to her annoyance her new flatmate is a loud mouthed mechanic who also likes to sneak his dog in whenever. But as she learns to know him better, she realizes they might have more in common than what she first thought. Eventually, even the darkest secrets come out…

Chapter summary: Small steps towards the right direction

A/N: After 3000 years I'm back. Sorry (yet again) that this has taken so long; life happened and after work I just don't always have enough energy (and time) to edit. But well, what counts is that this chapter is here now, right?

So, while I was absent, we have reached 10 000+ hits for this fic!! Huge thanks to all of you again for reading this fic, I really appreciate it 😊

Since it's been a while since the last chapter, as a reminder: in the previous chapters Calypso, Leo & co were on a roadtrip to Chicago to see Percy swim in the national championships. Calypso got very unsettled when she saw a couple of men who had close connections to her father in the audience. 

This chapter is still a pretty calm one but I swear that we /will/ be reaching more 'interesting' stuff soon. Some 'slife of life fluff' before the storm is always good, right? But now, please enjoy this chapter and let me know what you think!

Words: 4793

Genre: romance & hurt/comfort

Warnings: none

previous chapter / AO3

...

“Hey, Sunshine?” Leo knocked on Calypso’s door, trying to catch her attention. “I’m heading to Waystation to see Festus and the other animals. Jo and Emmie are out of town today so someone needs to check up on them.”

“Oh, okay. Good to know,” Calypso responded a bit absent mindedly. Her head was too full of different year numbers and names of politicians to be able to fully absorb what Leo had just told her. She was preparing for an important midterm exam, having even taken that day off from work to be able to spend it studying. She didn’t think she would have time to finish reading everything her professor had assigned otherwise.

“I also need to make sure that Georgie isn’t wrecking the whole house; she’s supposed to visit the neighbors in the evening but right now she’s alone. I asked Jo and Emmie why they wouldn't take her with them but apparently it had been her own wish to stay behind because she had some ‘project’ she wanted to work on.”

It still took her a moment to register his words. “Alright. Good luck with that.”

“Calypso? Are you even listening to me?” Leo furrowed his eyebrows as he stepped into her room. “Usually you’re a bit more involved in the conversation when I’m talking about Festus and Georgie.”

Calypso rubbed her forehead and blinked a couple of times, trying to get her focus back from the books.

“Ugh, sorry. I do love history but this book is impossible to read. That’s why I was a bit out of it,” she explained. “So… you’re going to see Georgina and the animals?”

“Yep, and I was wondering if you’d like to join me. Although, seeing you right now, I guess I should just let you stay here.”

She considered Leo’s suggestion for a moment before shaking her head. “No. I’m starting to think that I really could use a break. Not sure if any of this info will sink into my brain no matter how hard I’ll try. It feels like I’m just reading the same words over and over again.”

“I know the feeling.” Leo nodded. “It probably doesn’t help you that you’re not even reading in your first language, huh?”

“No, it doesn’t,” Calypso admitted. “Although when I did my home schooling, my books were written in English but the language in this one is far more complicated.”

“I can imagine. I’m lucky numbers are the same regardless of the language I study in. Makes things a bit simpler for me. Anyway, you coming?”

“Sure. Let me just… put something other than my pajamas on first.” Calypso looked down at her wrinkly, pink pants.

“Alright. Be ready in like 10 minutes. And don’t put on your best clothes!” He warned as she got up from her bed and opened her closet to decide what to wear. Picking a red striped flannel shirt and a pair of some of her more worn jeans, she shooed Leo away and started changing. She did wonder if she should be more comfortable with him seeing a bit more of her, but she couldn’t quite shake her variness yet due to her past experiences. When she would finally be ready, she’d let him know. She just wished that he knew he wasn’t the issue.

…

A bit later Leo and Calypso were in the car on their way to Waystation again. It was a rare bright early March day in Indianapolis, kind of crispy but sunny and Calypso enjoyed seeing some light after the gloomy beginning of the year. Not even the university buildings they drove past looked quite so uninviting in that weather. There was a thin snow cover on the ground, having just fallen a couple of days earlier, making the landscape even brighter. Back when she had been a kid she had only seen snow during her family’s trips to mountain areas so it was quite a rare treat for her.

“Hey, do you think we could stop to buy something warm to drink?” she asked. “I could use some caffeine to get the studying fog out of my brain.”

“Guess we’re not in that big a hurry,” Leo replied as he glanced at the car clock. “Although I’ll probably take something other than coffee. You know I’m not a huge fan of it.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m feeling like drinking caramel latte. And maybe I’ll have a nice chocolate-y brownie with it.”

“So that’s your way to cope with exams? A sugar crash?” Leo joked.

“I’m perfectly fine with that,” Calypso responded with a dreamy expression on her face as she pictured herself sitting cozily at the café with the drink in her hands.

“Hear that, random bypasser? My girlfriend is living dangerously,” Leo chuckled, pretending to be talking to an older woman who was walking on the sideway near them. Calypso wondered if the heater of the car had just started blowing in hotter air or if the idea of the hot drink was suddenly making her feel warmer. Or maybe it was just his laugh or the fact she secretly loved hearing him refer to her as his girlfriend. Since when had she been this kind of sap? Sometimes she couldn’t quite fathom what was going on in her brain when Leo was around.

“You better watch out, I might drag you down with me,” she joked back.

“Shit, sounds like I’m screwed,” Leo snorted. Quietly, he added: “but if you were with me, I wouldn’t care.”

While Calypso was still wondering how she should answer his comment, Leo opened his mouth again: “Hey, can I ask you something?”

His sudden serious tone got her a bit concerned. “Sure, of course.”

“How have you really been since that Chicago trip? I’m not blind; I can see it affected you pretty strongly,” he noted.

“Why do you think that?” Calypso asked, a bit mortified that Leo had noticed it so easily.

“When you live with someone for over half a year you do kinda learn certain things about them. Even I, who’s not the most socially skilled guy out there.” He shrugged.

“I suppose you have a point there…”

“Yep, but that doesn’t answer my question,” he pointed out.

“Honestly? I’ve been trying to not think about that trip,” Calypso confessed finally.

“Is that why you’ve been trying to drown yourself in work lately?” Leo frowned.

She hesitated for a moment. “I’ve honestly had a lot going on. The midterms are next week and spring is a busy time at the flower shop.”

“And that’s all?” He cocked his eyebrow.

“… Fine. It has been good to have something to distract myself. It’s just… really hard to brace myself for the inevitable, you know? I’m aware that some day the confrontation will happen, whether I want it or not. I can’t keep hiding forever… but on the other hand I don’t know if I’m emotionally prepared to face my father.”

“I think I get what you mean,” Leo said. “I would rather do almost literally anything than face my abusive aunt or my old foster families again.”

“Yeah. That’s how I feel about it. And I haven’t even told you half of the story yet.” She combed her hair with her fingers as she looked at something in the distance.

“You haven’t?” Leo questioned.

“Sadly, it’s true,” Calypso admitted. “Here’s one thing you don’t know about him yet: he took me and Zoë out of Greece without my mom’s permission. Mom and he had just made their divorce official a few weeks earlier and she had left us with him for the weekend while she was out of town organizing some things. When she came back… the only thing she found at our home was a piece of paper saying that we were on a whole another continent, the Atlantic Sea between us.”

“But couldn’t your mom have sued him for doing that?” Leo asked. “Shouldn’t that kind of thing be illegal?

Calypso shrugged. “I guess it is. I was too young to really understand everything that was going on back then – and it’s probably better that way - but I think my mom actually did try to sue him. But, surprise, my dad’s money won that fight. Mom didn’t have much left after the divorce so she couldn’t keep fighting for us. That’s why I’m still here and not in Greece.”

“Man, I wish I could just punch him in the face and…” He didn’t finish that sentence. “But here’s one but: as shitty as the way he treated you is – I know how it feels like to live in a family who doesn’t give a fuck – there’s definitely at least one person who is pretty selfishly happy that you didn’t go back to Greece.” He turned his gaze from the road to her for a second. “That would be me.”

Calypso couldn’t help but smile a bit at his comment. “Aww, thanks, babe. Maybe even the darkest cloud can have a silver lining…” Her hand briefly touched his on the gearstick before she withdrew it back to her side and sighed. “I’m just so ready to be done with this all.”

“I wouldn’t call myself the most optimistic person out there,” Leo started, “but I do know that you’re a pretty damn great person and you deserve good things from the universe. Tía Callida’s stories didn’t paint a very good picture of the Greek gods but if there’s any fairness left in them, things should end up going just fine for you. Let’s keep believing, right?”

“Alright,” Calypso said before quickly turning her face towards the side window so she could swipe a tear from the corner of her eye without Leo noticing. His nice words had overwhelmed her a bit; after being alone for so long she still wasn’t used to someone thinking so highly of her.

“Hey, look,” he pointed at something he saw by the street, which, she understood, was his way to try to distract her. “Isn’t that Percy in that bus stop ad? Advertising a blue sports drink?”

Calypso saw the ad and chuckled a little at the photo. “Oh my gods, it is. Annabeth must be happy. And Percy is looking so proud of himself there.”

“Yep, he totally is. I bet he picked that sponsorship simply because the drink is blue. That’s definitely something he’d do,” Leo noted.

“I think so too,” she agreed.

They kept chatting about random things they saw outside. A bit before they finally reached Waystation, Calypso noticed a yellow winged bird flying up from a tree. It wasn’t a Golden Oriole like the bird she had seen in her home country but the color reminded her of it. The bird flew higher and higher until she couldn’t see it anymore, but Calypso chose to take it as a good sign.

…

At Waystation Festus greeted the couple in his usual manner; jumping up and down and wagging his tail faster than Calypso thought was possible. After stopping to give him some treats, they went to check on Georgina who was cooking something in the kitchen on her own.

“Georgie!” Leo cried out, sounding pretty panicked. “What have you been told about using the stove when you’re alone? You’re not allowed to do that!”

Calypso had rarely seen Leo get really mad at his adoptive sister but this time she could tell that he was being serious. And she could understand why; Georgina was only a little older than Leo had been when the accident with his mom had happened. It wasn’t surprising to her that he would want to stop his little sister from causing any potential accidents, especially fire related. He rushed to move any potentially burnable objects from near the stove and turned the heat lower.

“Hey! I know what I’m doing! I cook all the time,” Georgina protested loudly.

“Yeah, but this time there was no one else home! What would you have done if something had started burning?” Leo asked, glaring at the girl.

“I… I would have called 911? It’s not that difficult, Leo.” The girl said after hesitating a bit, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Yeah, and the place might have burned down before they would have made it here. Listen, Georgie. I’m not saying this to be rude or annoying. I’m saying it because I once was in a situation that ended really, really badly because I was being careless, and I don’t want anyone, especially someone like you whom I care about very, very much, to go through anything like that. Do you understand?” From that Calypso realized that Leo may not have told Georgina about what exactly had happened with his mom yet. She glanced at Leo curiously but he was still focused on the young girl.

Georgina finally seemed a bit regretful. “Fine. I get it.”

“Good. Hermanita, believe me; the rules are there for a reason. It’s for your own good. And I’m saying this as someone who used to not care about the rules either.”

“Alright…” Georgina got suddenly interested in her shoe laces.

“Now then…” Leo seemed to relax a bit and a smile appeared on his face. “Now that you hopefully keep my advice in your mind… How about we finish what you started. What were you cooking, sis?” Georgina’s face brightened faster than Calypso could blink.

“I was hoping to make some crepes! Moms always say that I shouldn’t eat them too often because they are bad for my tummy but they can’t tell me what to do when they’re not home!” the girl announced rebelliously, making both Leo and Calypso burst into laughter.

“You tell them, hermanita,” Leo said between the chuckles. “There’s never a bad moment to eat some crepes no matter what our moms say.”

“I’m glad you’re taking my side here,” Georgina smiled at him, the earlier scene already forgotten. “Will you guys help me?”

“Of course we will!” Calypso ruffled the younger girl’s hair a bit and stepped closer to the kitchen counter to see what Georgina had already done. “Hey, did you remember the flour? Because this kind of looks like it’s missing something.”

Georgina went bright red as she realized Calypso was right. “Oops. I think I was gonna add it but then my friend called and I just forgot when she started explaining something to me.”

“Don’t worry about it. We can still fix this,” Calypso reassured her. She tied her hair on a high ponytail to avoid any from falling in the food and Leo went to get some aprons because he suspected that cooking with Georgina would get pretty messy. Ironically, he was the one who ended up spilling the most flour around and started drawing silly figures on the kitchen counter with his finger.

Once the batter was done, the girls had fun watching Leo flip the crepes on the flying pan (Calypso wondered how he had gotten so good at that) and after that they came up with a lot of creative fillings for them from ice cream and berries to jam and peanut butter. As the three were laying on some bean bags after eating way too much, Calypso was feeling relaxed for the first time since the swimming competition. It felt pretty good to be able to laugh again without a voice nagging in her head, telling her that she shouldn’t.

…

Once Georgina had gone to see her friend living in the same neighborhood, Calypso and Leo went to check the foster animals. Calypso had to admit that the bunny suits that were used to prevent spreading the germs around weren’t her favorite thing in existence; all the ones Leo’s parents had were really huge as Jo and Emmie were tall people and she had difficulties moving in them. Using a piece of fabric as her belt and rolling up the sleeves and the pant legs so that she wouldn’t fall, she gave Leo a pointed look because he was biting his lip trying to not show his amusement. Refraining herself from pointing out that he wasn’t that much taller than her, she followed him to the cat room where a couple of new, older cats were waiting for them.

According to Leo the new cats were more or less feral, not happy with human company and being stuck inside. Unfortunately for the felines, though, they had some medical conditions that needed to be taken care of, which was why they couldn’t be released into the wild yet even though they had already gotten their spays and neuters. Emmie had taught Leo how to use a towel to be able to give one of them the eye drops it needed due to an eye infection, but he was still slightly nervous about how it would work out. You never knew about cats, after all.

Emmie had purposefully left some hiding spots for the cats so that they would feel as safe as possible in their room, which was why Leo and Calypso didn’t see them at first when they entered. After looking around for a moment Calypso finally spotted a pair of gleaming eyes in a tiny tent in the corner of the room and pointed it to Leo. He found a towel in a cabinet and started quietly approaching the tent while Calypso stayed a bit farther, not wanting to freak the cat out any more than they already had.

“This actually makes this job a bit easier,” Leo whispered to Calypso. “Because she can’t escape from there as there’s only one small hole in that tent.”

“Don’t underestimate her escaping skills,” Calypso warned but continued following Leo’s progress. Slowly, he pushed the towel inside the tent so he could wrap it around the feline. Getting the cat out of the tent was a bit tricky but Leo managed to do that eventually. Carefully removing the towel from the feline’s face, he asked Calypso to pass the tiny eye drop bottle to him. Just when he got it into his hands and started unscrewing the lid, though, the lights in the room started flickering before turning entirely off.

“What happened?” Calypso asked. “Did the fuse get blown or…?”

“I dunno,” Leo replied, trying to stand up, which was surprisingly hard in almost a pitch black room with a feral cat on your lap. When he finally succeeded, he slowly walked towards the window and peeked out, as far as Calypso could tell from the darkness.

“It looks like the entire neighborhood is dark,” he muttered. “Guess the wind caused a blackout. And of course I left my phone… Ow! Damn cat!”

While he wasn’t paying attention, the cat managed to wriggle out of the towel and jump down from his arms with her claws out. Then she very frantically ran under a cabinet from where it would be notably harder for him to get her out.

“She got out of your grip?” she asked, trying to hide her amusement.

“Yeah,” Leo admitted. “And now I can’t catch her because it’s too dark. My phone is in the main building; I didn’t think I’d need it here.”

“I don’t have my phone with me either. This bunny suit doesn’t have pockets.” She pointed at her suit unnecessarily as he couldn’t see her anyway. “Do you know if there are any flashlights or such here?”

“I’m… I’m not sure. Maybe in the cabinet in the dressing room.”

“Anything else we could work with?” she inquired, knowing the said room was far back on another floor.

Calypso could hear some hesitation in Leo’s voice when he answered: “In the Christmas time whenever this room is empty, Emmie likes to put some candles on the windowsill. I think she may have left some in those drawers.” His bunny suit was rustling as he tried to show Calypso which drawers he meant. Opening them, she found out the first drawer only had some towels in it, but in the second one there was something that felt like tealight candles and a match box.

“Got it,” she announced.

“Oh, good. We need just enough light that we can go to find the flashlights without tripping on the stairs or something.”

The candles gave Calypso an idea.

“Hey… I get it if you’re not ready yet, but… this could be a good test situation. Want to give it a try?”

“You mean I would be lighting up the match?” Leo asked, not entirely able to hide the rising nervousness in his voice.

“Yeah. That’s what I was thinking.”

Leo remained quiet for a while. Calypso could almost hear the gears working in his head.

“Al-alright. Can’t win if you don’t try, huh?” He tried to sound brave, making her regret pushing him to do it.

Calypso attempted to find Leo’s hands in the dark and was happy to finally feel something warm and calloused under her fingers. Enjoying the warmth perhaps a moment longer than necessary, she dropped the match box into his hands and took the candle into hers.

“Alright. I’m gonna hold this candle while you light it. Remember, nothing bad is going to happen,” she tried to reassure him, running her free hand up and down his arm briefly.

“OK. I’m gonna try.” Leo took a deep breath. “Don’t judge me if this fails, though.”

“I might judge you for plenty of other things you’ve done but never that,” Calypso said playfully, trying to clear the air a bit, but she wasn’t sure if it worked.

Based on the clattering coming from Leo’s direction she could tell that his hands were shaking, but she pretended she didn’t notice.

A couple of snaps, most likely matches breaking, could be heard. Then some frustrated growling.

“This isn’t working out,” he muttered.

“Let’s not give up quite yet,” Calypso encouraged. “Try to think of this as something you have to do. The cats are depending on you and you can’t help them if you don’t have light.”

“I’ll give it a couple of more tries. If I don’t succeed by then, then clearly I’m not bound to succeed yet,” Leo decided.

“Fine,” Calypso agreed. “Remember, the cats. Also, I may reward you somehow if you do this.”

“Reward how?” Leo sounded a little curious, even with his nervousness.

“Well, won’t it be better if you don’t know it beforehand?”

“Okay, fine, keep it a secret,” Leo mumbled and focused on the matches again.

He kept scratching the next match against the box for a while until it split just like the ones before.

“Leo… breathe. You’re doing great.” Calypso’s eyes were starting to get adjusted to the darkness, allowing her to see the determination on his face, and something inside her melted. She kept whispering soothing words as he kept trying, hoping it would help.

A few more sticks split and Calypso knew there weren’t many left. He told her the next one would be the last one, taking a deep breath before going for it. Some more scratching, until finally…

“Woah!” he yelped, almost dropping the burning match in the process. Now that the flame was there, Calypso could see the surprise – and relief – on his face.

“Quickly, put it here,” Calypso handed the candle towards him and Leo didn’t waste any time, managing to make it burn, although shakily. Once that was done, he put out the flame in the match and dramatically laid down on the floor, weary from the stress reaction his fear had caused in him.

“I… Can’t believe I just did that,” he said, his hand covering his face.

“Soon you can set a fire in the big fireplace in the main building,” Calypso promised. She put the candle on a safe surface and laid down on the blanket meant for the cats, right next to Leo.

“Too soon,” he claimed wearily, giving her an unamused look.

Calypso wasn’t going to have a debate with him when he was in that state. “You’re right. Sorry. But believe it or not, I really am proud of you. I hope this will give you confidence that you can do it again.”

“Yeah. Hopefully it will.” He clearly started snapping out of his haze because a mischievous look returned to his face. “Hey, what about that reward?”

“What reward?” Calypso pretended to be oblivious for a second.

“The one you just promised.”

“Oh, right. That. I guess you deserve it.” Calypso rose to her knees and laid down on top of Leo. “I was kind of thinking of this kind of reward.”

She leaned down to kiss him on the mouth. It wasn’t one of those more passionate kisses that they had had more and more often recently, instead very light, almost teasing. With the hand that she didn’t use for support, she traced his jaw line, which he seemed to enjoy.

“I mean… I can picture better places for this than the cat hairy blanket…” Leo grinned. “But I am not gonna complain.”

“Yep, you’d better not,” Calypso grinned back at him.

“I might even consider using the matches more often,” Leo said before pulling her back for another kiss. While she wouldn’t have minded staying there a bit longer, she hadn’t forgotten that they were supposed to take care of the foster animals. Soon they got up from the blanket and Calypso took the candle from the dresser so that they could go and find the flashlights, still Leo’s preferred light source.

“Look. The flame you started.” She said proudly as she handed the tealight towards him. “Maybe you should carry it so you can show us the way.”

“Fine,” he sighed and took it from her slowly but actually didn’t seem too shaken by the flame anymore.

Within a few minutes they managed to find two flashlights from the shelter building’s dressing room. With their help Leo and Calypso found the feline somehow squished under a cabinet even though there wasn’t a whole lot of space there. After carefully blocking the potential escape routes, Leo finally managed to get the cat wrapped into the towel and pulled her back on his lap. He held her while Calypso gave her the eye drops, also daring to give her a couple of finger pets while she was still wrapped. The cat gave her a couple of half hearted hisses as a response but didn’t protest more.

“Look at that, you’re a real cat whisperer,” Leo smirked at her and threw her a high five now that he dared to loosen his grip on the cat. “That was some solid team effort, right?”

“You did most of the work, to be honest; I just put the drops in.

“Nah, without your encouragement I would probably still be sitting here in the dark wondering what I should do.”

“No, you would have found your way to the dressing room even without the candle. But fine; we do make a decent team.” She reached for his hand and squeezed it reassuringly.

“Yep, we do.” Leo nodded.

As they kept chatting, one of the cats, the younger of the two, had sneakily come out of his hiding hole and started playing with a string in the corner of the room. Only when he started jumping after it and making noise, did they realize that, and a big smile spread on Calypso’s face.

“Hey, do you think this guy might be willing to give up his feral card some day?” she asked. “Clearly he is not too afraid of our presence.”

“I think Emmie might have mentioned that this Cookie here is more open for human interactions,” Leo recalled. “Most of the ferals I’ve seen keep hiding when I’m in the same room with them.”

“Yeah, I guess that’s the natural reaction for them. How about we try to see what he says when we try to play with him?” Calypso suggested.

Leo found a feather wand toy from one of the drawers and slowly approached the cat, waving the wand on the ground.

At first not much happened. Cookie did seem kind of curious about the feathers but he remained skeptical, just staring at it. But when Leo switched it to another wand toy with a long ‘worm’ hanging from it, the cat couldn’t resist anymore. He started eagerly chasing it and Calypso couldn’t help but smile at the sight. She remembered how back when she had been a teenager, her sister Zoë had advised her to pay attention to how a guy treated animals. According to her, if he was kind to them, he was worth Calypso’s time. And Leo clearly loved animals.

Maybe not all choices she had made were bad ones.

[yukipri]

One Piece Mermaid AU!

Featuring Luffy as a rubber mermaid who can’t swim, and Ace who carries her on his back as they pirate together.

＊Genderbend warning, fem!Luffy

Sliding in last minute for MerMay, bc idk about you, but I need something to mark that May has passed this year...

~~

PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, EDIT, TRANSLATE, OR OTHERWISE USE MY ART. To share, please reblog! Reblogs and comments greatly appreciated!!!

~~

Base headcanons for this AU beneath the cut! ↓ ↓ ↓

Luffy's a mermaid who was raised in Fuusha village, just like in canon. And, just like in canon, despite being a mermaid, she SUCKS at swimming, a fact that Shanks finds absolutely hilarious. She still wants to become a pirate, she still eats her devil fruit and becomes a rubber mer(?), she still gets kidnapped by Higuma (who sees her as an excellent way to rake in cash, given how valuable mermaids are on the slave market), and Shanks still gives her his hat.

As a devil fruit user, Luffy's already atrocious swimming skills are now at zero. She can still breathe under water, but will sink like a stone, her strength sapped by the sea, and if she loses consciousness she'll stop breathing too. Needless to say, she stays out of the water, and the villagers come to accept that sometimes, mermaids just live on land.

Garp still comes back, and is still furious at her wanting to become a pirate (and inwardly, extremely concerned that a bandit tried to catch and sell her), and still takes her to live at Dadan's where she meets Ace.

Ace has no idea what to think of the weird fish-brat who he's now told is gonna be his sibling, and resolutely ignores Luffy. He's inwardly slightly impressed as Luffy continues to follow him through the mountain every day, not even particularly hindered by lack of legs and using a mixture of crawling, squirming, hand-walking, and ricocheting forward with rubber arms to move.

Luffy still meets Sabo the same way as canon, and is still caught by Porchemy, who at first is thrilled because a mer brat! That'll bring in WAY more money than the spare change Ace stole! But in the end, he loses his temper at Luffy's stubbornness and still beats her to a pulp.

Ace and Sabo still rescue Luffy, and they still exchange sake cups and become brothers.

Yes, brothers.

Because at this point, neither Ace nor Sabo nor any of the bandits, nor anyone really on Dawn island save Makino and Garp actually know that Luffy's a girl. Not even Luffy.

The three brothers promise to each other that they'll all leave the island when they turn seventeen, setting out to sea to become pirates (Ace and Sabo are honestly a little concerned, given how often people try to sell Luffy, and how despite aquatic appearances Luffy's vulnerable af in water, but decide to wait and see. They have seven years together, Luffy ten until seventeen, who knows how much stronger their baby brother will get in that time).

Sabo "dies."

Ace and Luffy continue to train, and things don't change until Ace is seventeen, shortly before he sets out to sea.

He's let Luffy crawl into his blanket to sleep with him (partially cold-blooded, Lu gets cold easily when inactive), and Ace realizes that his lil brother's chest feels a bit lumpy.

Concerned, he makes Luffy have it checked out by the bandits, who are shocked to find developing...breasts?

That can't be right...right?

Dadan makes a call to Garp, who snorts and says of COURSE Luffy's a girl, didn't he say granddaughter?

No, he had not, he had only mentioned "grand child."

Everyone is shocked, but none more so than Ace, who really doesn't know what to do with this new information.

(Luffy's not quite sure what a "girl" is, and when she asks Ace, Ace honestly doesn't know how to define "girl" either, so she doesn't get what the big deal is)

Ace realizes he's troubled because he can't remember the number of times he's rescued Luffy from potential traffickers, and the number of times he's heard the lament, "Pity it's not female, it'd be worth quadruple," from the kidnappers before he beats them to a pulp.

He already had doubts about letting Luffy go out to sea alone, three years after he's left. But now knowing that Luffy's a girl, and one of the most sought-after species that traffickers target...he knows the world out there is much bigger than a teeny peaceful East Blue island, and Luffy may not get lucky every time, and may not be strong enough in just three years.

But at the same time, it's not like he can order her to stay here. There's no way Luffy'd listen; the sea calls to her, freedom calls to her, and Ace understands that more than anyone.

Sabo, Ace thinks, what would you do?

The night before he leaves, Ace tells Luffy that there's been a change of plans.

He's still leaving for sea. He's going to get stronger, and work his way towards becoming Pirate King.

BUT, three years later, Luffy will NOT leave Dawn Island alone.

Ace promises that he'll come back, a stronger pirate capable of looking out for his baby brother (because girl or not, they exchanged vows of brotherhood, and that's something that can't be changed).

He refuses to let Luffy be his captain, he's still got his pride, but maybe, maybe if Luffy becomes strong enough, he'll let her be co-Captain.

Luffy is thrilled, because she wanted to be pirates WITH Ace, and grudgingly accepts the compromise, and promises to train and wait for Ace's return.

Ace leaves Dawn island, and makes a name for himself on the Grand Line (he's PISSED when he finds out he's eaten a devil fruit, because now how's he supposed to rescue Lu from drowning when he can't swim himself???).

He even eventually makes it to Whitebeard, and eventually comes to admire the man. Whitebeard invites him to his crew, and Ace honestly replies that a large part of him wants to accept...but he can't. He promised his baby brother that they'll be pirates and co-captains together, and he can't join another pirate crew without Luffy agreeing too. Even so, and he knows it's selfish of him, he wants to call Whitebeard his father.

Whitebeard tells him that Ace is already his son, regardless of where his allegiances lie, and gives him his blessing to return to East Blue to fetch Luffy. Whitebeard laughs that he can't wait to meet the lil brat that Ace speaks so highly of, and for Ace to hurry up and come back to the New World so they can meet.

Ace plans on traveling light, his former crew all choosing to join the Whitebeard pirates except for his first mate, Deuce. Ace loves his crew, but they're also his crew, and knows that he wants to make their crew with Luffy. So he thinks he and Deuce will be a good starting point (You're just bringing me along bc you want someone who can swim on the crew, Deuce accuses).

As they're planning on leaving, Marco lets slip to fellow commander Thatch that he heard that Ace's "little brother" is actually a super cute girl.

The next morning, Thatch shows up too, insisting that he come along, because hey! He's been with the Whitebeards for ages and hasn't been to Paradise in a while, he wants some change! And won't it be nice to have someone as reliable as him along, just until they get back to the New World and reunite with the Whitebeards? Really he has no ulterior motives like wanting to check out Ace's supposedly hyper hot baby brother-sister!

Ace is suspicious, but Thatch is already on board and the other Whitebeards are already waving so he lets it go.

(Shortly after they leave, Thatch discovers a devil fruit. Deuce tells him to sell the damn thing, it'll taste like shit, but Thatch thinks boy wouldn't it be great to be able to woo Ace's hot brother with a really cool devil fruit power. So he eats it, and yeah it tastes like shit, but now he can control Darkness which is sorta badass?)

(Somewhere on the Whitebeard ships, Blackbeard is still waiting for someone to find the darkness devil fruit, and well, it doesn't happen)

Before Ace returns to Dawn Island, part of him still hopes that Luffy looks passably like a guy. Having been to Fishman island, having befriended Jinbe, he knows that while mermen can still be targeted, mermaids are exponentially more vulnerable. He's learned the kinds of clothing that can help conceal tails, and is hoping that there's a slim chance they might be able to be pirates without the world knowing that Lu's a mermaid.

His hopes are shot when Luffy rockets into his arms at the dock, and his face is immediately buried in enormous tits that definitely weren't there three years ago.

Despite Ace's growing concerns (and red face; why does he feel so hot??? It's not his devil fruit...), Ace lets Luffy give Deuce a beating (why me?!) to claim her position as Ace's Co-Captain of the newly established ASL pirates (because if we're pirates together, Sabo has to be with us too!).

Luffy's gotten a lot stronger, but is still utterly ignorant of the outside world and the dangers it holds (such as the drooling Thatch who immediately wins Luffy over with his cooking despite Ace's burning glares). She's reckless and falls into the ocean every damn day, and while Deuce dives in after her and they've discovered her useful ability to talk to fish to ask for help, it still gives Ace heart attacks.

They still pick up more crew members while in East Blue, including Roronoa Zoro, Usopp, and Sanji, a pervy cook who competes daily with Thatch for Luffy's affections through food (Luffy appreciates the food).

At Arlong Park, Luffy encounters fishmen for the first time in her life. Arlong mocks Luffy's choice of friends and family, and invites her to join his crew made of her own kind. Fishmen and mer are the superior race, and Luffy will make a fine wife, Arlong says.

Luffy breaks his nose off, and Nami joins their crew.

Luffy's chosen mode of transportation is on the back of one of her sturdier crew mates, usually Ace, but often Zoro too. She unfortunately hates all the long skirts/robes Ace suggested for her to hide her tail, and so Ace has decided that being as intimidating as possible while carrying his brother glued to his back is the only way to go.

Needless to say, news of the former Spade Pirates Captain + Whitebeard Commander Thatch (are they an extension of the Whitebeards??) establishing the new ASL pirates spreads fast. That, and rumors that there's a beautiful young mermaid on board who can't swim. And despite the strength of the crew and their attempts at vigilance, Luffy's still dumb and gullible, and is kidnapped (and rescued) a dozen times before they're even on the Grand Line.

(after a few times, Luffy's uncharacteristically quiet, and privately asks Ace if they can break up the crew. She's holding Ace back; she not only made him come back to her, but half their adventures just seem to be her crew rescuing her. She's strong enough to defeat enemies, but not save herself. Ace tells her to shut up, and never bring this up again; they're BROTHERS, and he's not going to leave her behind or make her abandon her dreams when she can't accomplish them alone, and that's his choice. Luffy doesn't bring it up again, but works harder than ever to become stronger and earn recognition as co-Captain when the world seems intent on thinking of her as Ace's pet.)

During one of these kidnappings, Luffy's successfully brought all the way to an auction house before her crew can rescue her. An auction house that unbeknownst to them, was under investigation by the Revolutionary Army.

Liberating slaves is an unfortunately common mission for them, and Sabo's doing final sweeps as Koala frees the last of them when he notices a tank stowed away in a corner. He's familiar with these tanks, used to showcase mermaids in the rare occasions one can be caught, and it looks empty but he's still drawn to it for some reason.

It's only when he gets closer that he notices a mermaid crumpled at the bottom of the enclosure. She's completely slumped over, and he's afraid she's already gone, even as something about her screams with familiarity.

He's cracked the tank and has reached in to pull her out, when the wall behind him explodes in flames, revealing a furious Ace who snarls at the strange man with his hands on his baby brother...

...and then Sabo's memories come back.

~~

Something like that???? For an initial HCs dump????

This AU has continued! A LOT! Check out the comics, illustrations, and text stories for this AU under the Mermaid AU section of my One Piece Masterpost!

As always, REBLOGS, tags, asks, and comments greatly appreciated!

Advance posts for this AU and more are on my Patreon! (Patreon(.)com/YukiPri)

[kingstylesdaily]

Stevie Nicks Answers All Our Questions About Harry Styles

Of all the disciples to worship at the altar of Stevie Nicks, none have managed to capture the attention of rock’s reigning priestess quite like Harry Styles.

The 26-year-old rocker (who this week received three Grammy nominations) is the Gucci-clad poster boy carrying the torch for a bygone era of music history that the Fleetwood Mac frontwoman helped crystallize. Styles recently cited the group’s 1977 (and still charting) classic “Dreams” as one of the first songs he learned the words to growing up. Their friendship began in 2015 after the former One Direction member presented his idol with a hand-piped birthday cake after a Fleetwood Mac gig in London. (“Glad she liked carrot cake,” he later said.) The years since have seen the duo’s mutual affection blossom into one of pop culture’s most cherished bondings.

Last year, when Styles inducted Nicks into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, he proclaimed the 72-year-old “everything you’ve ever wanted in a lady, a lover, in a friend.” Nicks has gushed about him in interviews as everything from “the son she never had” to her “love child” with bandmate Mick Fleetwood. Styles earned her official seal of approval after covering “The Chain” every night of his first solo tour in support of a record that sounds closer to Crosby, Stills & Nash than anything he released under his prior band.

“Harry could’ve lost a lot of fans, but he didn’t,” Nicks recently told Vogue over the phone. “I’m so proud of him because he took a risk and didn’t go the One Direction route. He loves One Direction, I love One Direction, and a gazillion other people do too, but Harry didn’t wanna go the pop route. He wanted straight-up rock and roll circa 1975.”  

Nicks has been embracing some of the busiest years of her dual careers as both Fleetwood Mac frontwoman and solo sorceress—and doing so amid a global pandemic. Since she last performed with Styles at the Forum for his Fine Line release show in December, she’s released a 24 Karat Gold concert film and “Show Them the Way,” her politically minded single and first piece of original music in six years. After Miley Cyrus asked for Nicks’s blessing before releasing her “Edge of Seventeen”–tinged “Midnight Sky,” the two joined forces for an exhilarating new mash-up titled “Edge of Midnight.”

In honor of Styles making history as the magazine’s first solo cover boy, Nicks caught up with Vogue to answer all our questions about their cosmic connection. Currently beachside with her quarantine bubble in Hawaii, she’s been doing what one would expect Stevie Nicks to be up to during a pandemic: writing new music, dancing around her house to “Watermelon Sugar,” and “casting little spells.” As befitting rock’s foremost storyteller, our intended 30-minute chat turned into a two-hour confessional about her love of Styles, working with Cyrus for the first time, joining Fleetwood Mac, the president-elect Joe Biden, the Met Gala, betta fish funerals, and much more.

ksd note: edited to only include Q&A about Stevie and Harry!

Did you get a chance to look through Harry’s cover story yet?  

Right before I called you, I sat here and looked at all the pictures on my new iPad. What can I say? That’s my Harry. I think the thing that’s most wonderful about him—and I’ve told him this, and sometimes I think he takes it the wrong way—is that he’s such a kooky guy. He’s the type of person you’d wanna live next door to. He’d look out the window, see you having a hard time planting flowers, and rush out asking, “Can I help you with those roses?” “Sure, but you are Harry Styles, right?” That’s who he is.

I really only know him to a certain extent, but I have gotten to experience some big moments in his life, like when he released his first solo record at the Troubadour. I always think of Tom Petty saying, “So, you wanna be a rock star or you wanna be a pop star?” It’s two completely different things, and he really could have gone pop like his friend Zayn [Malik]. I was sorry that Zayn didn’t keep going more because I thought he was really good. But he took the pop route, which I think was right for him. Harry could’ve lost a lot of fans doing rock and roll, but he didn’t. Harry did a long tour with that first record and said, “I’m a different person now. I have a full-on rock band, and this is what I’m gonna do.” With many of my records, I’ll stuff down peoples’ throats until they like it, and that’s exactly what he did. Then he went away and wrote Fine Line, one of my favorite records.

What were your immediate thoughts listening to Fine Line for the first time?

Me and four of my friends sat with Harry in his living room  in London and listened to it a few times before it came out. But it wasn’t really Fine Line yet. The first time we listened to it, nobody really said anything. The second time everyone started to go, “I think this song is great, but it should be second in the sequence.” By the third listen, it was five girls screaming, “Well, Harry really now, I think you need to take these four that are called Harry Songs and do this and that—” while he’s sinking in his reclining chair thinking, Are these women ever gonna leave? Thanks for your opinions, but oh, my God, stop already.  

What changed when you heard the record in it’s finished form?

This record means a lot to me. When it was all put together, I listened and said, “Oh, my god, the Beatles live.” A whole lot of people live in these songs. Fleetwood Mac lives there. I live there. When I listen to “Fine Line,” I hear melodies that would’ve worked on “A Day in the Life. “It has that same kind of complexity. I think the Beatles would’ve thought, Here we’ve influenced a young man who took some incredible things from us and made them his own years and years later.

Earlier this year you posted a message saying that Fine Line is Harry’s Rumours. Can you elaborate on what you meant by that?

When Harry asked me to do “Landslide” with him at the Forum, I asked why, and he said, “Because I want you to be there. You were there for my first night at the Troubadour for the first record.” That night I wrote him a letter that said, “This is your Rumours so you have to really respect it and adore it because these kinds of records sometimes don’t ever come again.” Fleetwood Mac went on to make many great records, but people would bet their life on the fact that Rumours was the one. And this might just be the one for Harry. We were all kind of the same age when we made Rumours. I was 28, and Lindsey [Buckingham] was 27. I actually don’t even know how old Harry is—he’s that timeless to me.

Do you have a personal favorite of his songs?

Every one represents a different thing to me. “Sunflower” is such a great little song. He loves to do crazy videos, and one time I called him and said, “I have an idea. You’re gonna be a bee, and the sunflower would be your girlfriend, and you guys would get married and live in a beehive with your little bee children. You’d sing the lyrics ‘kiss in the kitchen like it’s a dance floor duh duh duh’ and show this entire bee relationship.” 

What did he think of that pitch?

When I finished, the other end of the phone was silent. I said, “No, really, think about it. It’ll be fantastical like a Francis Ford Coppola movie.” He’s like, “Yeah, okay...” [laughs]. I also love the “Adore You” video with the little fish because I have my own special relationships with fish.

In what sense?

I always have two beta fish, but they have to be separated otherwise they’ll kill each other. I stick my finger into their aquarium, and the blue one will swim around my hand like a little dolphin. When my fish get old and suddenly die, I have funerals for them in my backyard where I play Celine Dion. I have them filmed, and everything [laughs]. It’s too much, but I thankfully haven’t had any recent fish deaths. I haven’t even been able to sit down and show Harry the videos of my little fish, so when I saw the “Adore You” video, I couldn’t believe it.

Why is it important for you to foster these relationships with younger artists like Harry who’ve been so openly influenced by you?

I’m inspired by them. I’m inspired that Miley wants to make music with me. I’m inspired that the Haim girls are my biggest fans—and I theirs. A lot of these kids are making the amazing records I’ve been waiting for them to make. I’m not like other 72-year-olds. I listen to current music because I want to be current. When people find out how old I am versus the music I’m listening to, they think it doesn’t gel at all. I’ve been collecting musical knowledge since I was in the fourth grade listening to the singles my grandfather used to bring home. I listened to Buddy Holly and the Everly Brothers until the sixth grade when R&B radio became Top 40. I said goodbye country and hello R&B, so it’s not like I’m ever stuck on one thing. What I love about Harry is that he’s very old school but still modern. And that’s kinda like me.

You both also transitioned from massive groups to equally massive solo careers rather seamlessly.

When I decided I wanted to be a solo artist, I’d only been in Fleetwood Mac for a few years. I tried to figure out a way to do it gracefully because I didn’t wanna break up the band. I just wanted to sit at my piano and write poetry. After we did a record and a really long tour, the band scurried off to different parts of the world while I’d just be home writing songs for a year and a half. What did they care what I did while they were all on vacation? I’ve always said all the way through these two careers I’ve had: If you’re in a band first, never break it up.

Do you think One Direction would ever reunite?

I think it’s a good idea. For all we know, One Direction is completely broken up forever. But I think those guys are friends, and five or ten years down the road, they could all go, “You know what, wouldn’t it be really fun to do a One Direction tour?” Because that’s what people do. I wouldn’t be surprised if they did reunite at some point just because they can. And because it would just be fun. Harry is the kind of person who would never stomp on that idea. He would never say, [imitates posh English accent] “Never! I would never do that again!” Because why not just keep the door open?

Was there any particular detail or passage in Harry’s cover story that stuck out to you?

According to this article, he can get in a car with his friend to drive all over Europe then drive back by himself. I stopped driving in 1978 because my driver’s license expired and I’d already made a lot of money. I very smartly thought, “You know what, if someone even hits you and it’s not even your fault but you’re a little drunk, you are done. You’re finished, and the fortune that you’ve made is gone, so why should you drive anyway?” By then me and Christine were very cloistered, but Harry’s able to live a freer life because he’s a guy. He’s like Mick. He has a free life.

Would you say that you don’t?

I’m only comparing us in the way that Harry goes off to the Bahamas to work on songs, then flies back to L.A., then London, then Italy—I can’t do that. I can’t do that by myself. He’s able to do whatever he wants by himself, and it’s a whole different way of life. Being that Harry is a guy, he’s able to be a loner more than I am. As a woman, I’m not free to do all that. Even when I was his age, I couldn’t just get off anywhere I wanted. When we were on the road, Christine and I didn’t have a clue in the world what the boys did. We went to our rooms with security guys standing outside. It’s not like we ever escaped to go club-hopping in downtown Manhattan. We never got to live that life, so freedom as Harry knows it is very different than it’s been for me.

Did you ever have any figure in your life who provided some sense of mentorship the way you have to artists like Harry?

I didn’t really have anyone. If I had any guiding force at all, it probably would’ve been Christine McVie because she was five years older than me. And five years is five years, you know? Chris was friends with Eric Clapton and knew all the famous musicians in London. She’d married John [McVie] and done a bunch of records with Fleetwood Mac before I came along, so she’d been in the music business for a long time. I was breaking up with Lindsey when she was breaking up with John. She was my therapist and my go-to person for just about everything. We had each other to get through that really difficult situation where no one was gonna quit the band. Christine and I kept the whole thing together by telling the three men, “You quit because we’re not stopping” Thank God I had her, but on the other side of that, thank God she had me. We really were a force of nature.

** I’m curious to what extent fashion plays a role in your and Harry’s relationship. Have you** gifted him any accessories that were significant to you?

I actually gave him a ring at the Forum thing. It’s very masculine and has a pink stone in it. I told him it was a pink diamond, but it really isn’t. It would’ve cost $5 million. It was mine, and I really loved it, but I thought, This should be for Harry. You can see it on his hands in the “Falling” video where he’s playing the piano. If Harry and I were in a band together, we’d be trading all kinds of crazy stuff.

What are your thoughts on him being the first solo male cover in Vogue’s history?

It makes me feel so inspired. I’m extremely jealous he’s on the cover of Vogue because I’m 72 years old and have wanted to be on the cover my whole life. I’m such a magazine hag, so I’m incredibly jealous of Harry, but I’ll get over it. As far as all the crazy things he’s wearing, you do whatever you have to do to be on the cover of Vogue. I’m very proud of him, and I think it’s great that there’s a man on the cover…but I should’ve been in the corner off in the distance [laughs]. Did you know I’ve never been to the Met Gala?

We would be honored to have you at the next gala and every one after that. I’m putting this in the article to make sure it’s in the public record.

As Mick Jagger says, “We still have our freedom, but we don’t have much time.” I would like to be not much older than I am now so I can wear a fantastic outfit and entertain everybody. It’s a dream of mine, and most of my dreams have come true, but I need to not be 90 when it happens.

Harry and you could perform together.

We wouldn’t even have to rehearse. We’ve got a couple of duets that are really great. We do “Landslide” and “Two Ghosts” together really well. We actually have five or six terrific acoustic numbers that we could do at the drop of a hat.

You hinted earlier this year that there might be a role for Harry in the miniseries based on the stories of Rhiannon. Is there any update there?

This is probably the third-biggest thing I’ve ever done in my life after Fleetwood Mac and my solo career. There’s a lot to be done in the movie business before I can start riding my horses across the mountains of Wales. I’ve signed with a movie company—I’m not gonna tell you who—and we just signed a writer. I’m not gonna tell you who that is either, but there’s an amazing part for Harry. My favorite character in the series is the only man who goes through all four books. He’s a magician who doesn’t wanna be king, and I think Harry would just be so perfect.

Have you and Harry discussed collaborating on any future music together?

We’re open to making music together because we’ve been very successful when we go onstage just to do one song. I would love to be in a band with Harry, but even if I never saw him in person again, he’s made a record that breaks my heart in a million places like Fine Line. As far as music goes, there’s plenty of fun things that he and I could do. We can just reach out to each other and do it. I’m always ready to slip back into those high-heel black suede boots and become my alter ego.

via Vogue.com

[peaceoutofthepieces]

Sink Or Swim

tag list: @cleocc @feeling-kinda-so-so @hopelessromanticvirgo @dreamy-slytherin @adora8 @lockerfivethreefive @painfully-oblivious @poeticinemaa @jjustonemorething @sassy-sara @wedarkacademia @coolguyssyndrome @hischbabe @suckerforsobbe @tayspots @starmansander @theah0lt @zoenneforever @invisibleme @chibibanane @odi-et-amo85 @watermelonlover-123 @xiaomailab

The following clip contains mentions of mental illness and suicide attempt (near the end — when Lucas starts talking about his mother). Feel free to skip that section and message me for a brief description.

~^~

Friday, 19:41

Songs: Haux - Something To Remember; SG Lewis - Warm

Jens’s hands shake as he unlocks the door, nudging it open quietly with Lucas close at his back. He steps into the dark hallway and flicks on the light, dropping his keys on the small table as Lucas shuts the door behind them. Jens wills himself to relax, reminds himself that they’re alone as he shrugs off his coat and hangs it on the hook and allows Lucas to do the same.

“What did you say your parents are doing?”

“They’re having a date night for their anniversary, booked a hotel room. Lotte’s staying at her friend’s house.”

Lucas hums, tugs Jens around to face him and slides his arms around his waist. “So we’re alone, and you can chill.”

Jens drops his head onto his shoulder and nods, pressing a kiss to the crook of Lucas’s neck. He reaches behind himself to take Lucas’s hands and then leads him into the house. Jens plans to take him on a short tour, but they get interrupted at the first stop. Ace slinks out through the doorway to the sitting room and immediately winds himself through Jens’s legs, gazing up at Lucas warily.

“You have a cat?” Lucas asks, grinning down at the furball.

“Yeah, and he can be kinda bitchy, so I’d hold off on becoming a fan.”

As Jens says it, Ace butts his head against Lucas’s leg. Lucas raises his brows, grinning widely as Ace wraps around his feet. He leans down to scratch behind the cat’s ears and earns himself a purr as Ace rubs his head against his palm.

Jens watches the interaction with a glowing heart. It had been a spur of the moment decision, when Jens had asked him to come over. He hadn’t allowed himself to overthink, but had just jumped at the opportunity. He can’t remember the last time he has had the house to himself, but it certainly wasn’t within the space of time in which he’s known Lucas. Jens had only managed to spend the two nights so far with Lucas due to pure luck. Lucas had snuck him in the first time, and then his father had been working an evening and morning shift the second. They have never got to spend a full night truly alone, just to themselves, and that’s what Jens wants. His body thrums with the need for it even now, having ratcheted up a few notches since last Friday.

It’s almost unbearable, how much he just wants Lucas’s hands on him. It’s definitely embarrassing.

He may also be hoping to coax Lucas into opening up a little. Lucas has been a little quiet the past few days, thoughtful. He keeps turning to Jens as if he wants to say something and then stopping with a smile, offering him a kiss instead. Jens doesn’t mind the added affection in the slightest, even while being teased by his friends, even while wondering why it doesn’t freak him out. Lucas touches him and everything else seems to go still. That doesn’t worry him.

But there are other questions that still cause him concern, and he’s waiting and waiting for Lucas to provide the answers. He’s desperately reminding himself to be patient, to be trusting, but it’s difficult. It’s harder when he fears the faith isn’t being returned.

It’s familiar.

“You were so cute,” Lucas marvels, snapping Jens out of his daze. He’d wandered into the sitting room on his own and now stands admiring the photo frames on the mantle. His mouth stretches into a grin, taking in various images of Jens at different ages, none of them all that flattering.

“Come on, I didn’t bring you here so you could tease me,” Jens protests.

Lucas turns to him and raises a brow, smirking. “I thought that’s exactly why you brought me here.”

Jens flushes, but doesn’t deny it.

Lucas walks back to him, laughing quietly. “I’m not teasing, though. I mean it. You’re adorable.” He presses up onto his toes and kisses Jens’s nose.

Jens resists the urge to roll his eyes at him or drag him into a proper kiss and leads him to the kitchen instead. Lucas traipses after him leisurely, taking everything in, trailing his fingers along the wall. Jens opens the fridge. “Do you want anything else to eat? Or drink?”

“Uhm, just water, maybe?”

Jens pours him a glass of water and hands it over, filling one for himself and leaning back against the counter before taking a sip. He considers Lucas for a moment and then holds up a finger before slipping out to the back door. He cracks it open and immediately catches sight of Nugget on the step, waiting patiently.

Jens huffs and steps back, opening the door wider and allowing him to scuttle in and run straight to the kitchen. Jens returns just in time to see Lucas drop into a crouch, face lighting up with excitement as Nugget barges right into his hands, tongue hanging and tail wagging as Lucas sets his hands in his fur.

“Hi,” Lucas coos, voice taking on the tone Jens has only ever heard people use with babies. “You’re so cute. What’s your name? Huh?”

Jens bites his lip as he makes his way over to him, shaking his head at the display. By now Nugget is scrabbling at Lucas’s hoodie, having raised onto his back paws to get closer. “This is Nugget,” Jens introduces. “Nugget, this is Lucas. I was gonna warn you not to be jealous that I might like him more, but obviously he’s not gonna let that be a problem.”

Lucas grins up at him, entirely amused by his sigh and his pout. “You’re still my favourite,” he soothes. “Even more so now that I’ve met your dog.”

Jens laughs, but he is soothed. He relaxes even further as Lucas raises back to full height and draws him into a kiss. They enjoy the few seconds before Nugget barks, and then Jens is huffing and pulling away, looking down at him with a scowl. “Why did I let you in?”

Lucas smacks the back of his head for the comment, but kisses him again immediately after his whine of pain. Jens goes about getting Nugget his food and water as Lucas sits down on the floor and plays with him, looking entirely at home in Jens’s kitchen. It has an effect Jens can’t quite describe beyond the race of his heart and the flutter in his stomach. They spend a little while in this space, talking quietly about nothing. They discuss their studying, exams, assignments, for a few minutes before shutting it down in the agreement to take the night off. Nugget comes to settle himself in Lucas’s lap after filling his stomach, having already taken ownership of the boy. Jens might actually be a little annoyed if he didn’t feel so fond.

After a while, he lets Nugget back out into the garden and takes Lucas upstairs.

He has a brief moment of panic in which he wonders over the state of his room, not entirely comforted by the reminder that he has seen Lucas’s space in utter disarray multiple times. He’s glad when he opens the door and can’t inmediately see a mess or any laundry lying around. He turns to look at Lucas hesitantly, biting his lip as he watches the boy look around, taking in the space with delicate attention.

He moves around, examining the books on Jens’s shelves, his small collection of old CDs. He roves his eyes over the walls, where football posters are still tacked up alongside some of his drawings. Lucas zones in on these, lips twitching up at the corners as he gets closer.

“I didn’t know you drew.”

Jens shrugs. “I don’t, really. At least not like you. Not seriously. Just those kind of doodles.”

Lucas smiles fully, nodding. “They’re cool. Maybe you have a knack for art after all and aren’t just a secret makeup nerd.”

“Oh, Robbe already sent me some of the edited version of that. Do you want to see?”

“Really, already? That was quick.”

“It’s Robbe,” Jens laughs. “He’s always working.”

Lucas nods and Jens nods back, crawling onto his bed and patting the space beside him as he takes out his phone. Lucas settles down against his side, making himself comfortable on Jens’s shoulder the second he’s given permission. Jens pulls up the video and hits play. He relaxes into his pillows, focused more on Lucas pressed against him than the video. Lucas’s quiet laughter is enough of an indicator, and Jens only looks at the phone when he groans, covering his face with a hand.

“I can’t believe I let you rope me into this. Kes and Jayden are gonna see this and they’ll never let me forget about it.”

Jens huffs, pressing a kiss to the top of his head as he watches the footage. It’s one of the close-ups of Lucas, showing off the smoky eye Jens had managed to give him as he looks up at the camera, shaking his head before Jens stills him, laughing. “You look really pretty, though. I mean it,” Jens adds, before Lucas can roll his eyes or laugh it off.

The boy blushes instead, glancing up at him under his lashes, smiling widely. “You think so?”

Jens hums, tilting his head down to kiss him, relaxing further. “You always do, though. My handiwork just helped a little.”

“Oh, is that it?” Lucas laughs, leading Jens to hum again. “Okay, I see.”

Jens goes in for another kiss, but something has distracted Lucas. He leans up and away from Jens as he looks at his shelves again. “Is that a keyboard?”

Jens follows his line of sight before nodding.

“Moyo said you were more of a musician. Why have I never heard you play?”

It’s a simple enough question, and yet it makes Jens nervous. “I don’t know, I don’t really do it as much anymore.”

Lucas looks at him, soft and curious. “Would you play something for me anyway?”

Jens only hesitates for a moment before getting to his feet and fetching the instrument. He settles on the bottom of the bed, facing Lucas, who had leaned back to lie against the headboard as he watches him. Jens balances the keyboard on his lap and takes a moment to turn it on and adjust the volume, pressing a few keys to test it out and give him time to think of a song.

Eventually he settles on a score he’d learned recently, devoid of lyrics and focusing entirely on the notes. It starts off slow and allows him to get into a rhythm, fingers shaking, fluttering through the first few sections before gaining a little confidence as the rhythm becomes familiar.

It’s nerve-wracking, being able to feel Lucas’s eyes on him. Having anyone’s eyes on him. But he focuses on the music, and doesn’t falter.

He floats his hands naturally over the keys, having settled entirely by the time the rhythm picks up. It’s still not the hardest speed, and has a few repetitions, and it doesn’t take quite enough of his attention to make him forget about Lucas. He chances a glance at him when it slows down again, fingers lingering on the keys. Lucas is watching him with rapt attention, lips slightly parted, entirely focused. He looks much too enticing to just be lying here, in Jens’s bed, watching him, not doing anything to distract or attract attention and managing it anyway. Jens quickly averts his gaze down again and falls back into the quicker notes.

By the time he reaches the high section, his heart is at ease. It flows out of him in the stillness of the room, his pulse matching the ebb and flow of the music as it tapers out. It fills him with a light only music can, a familiarity now long ingrained in him. It’s in his nature, to pour himself out through his hands into the keys.

He holds the last note for an extra second, then looks up at Lucas. The boy is already watching him with a smile, eyes alight with that familiar wonder and misty with something Jens can’t identify. He crawls down the bed towards Jens and draws him into a kiss, deep and slow, careful of the keyboard in Jens’s lap as he tangles a hand in his hair. Jens kisses back reflexively, heart thudding.

“You’re amazing,” Lucas murmurs, after a few minutes that may just be seconds, expression still achingly soft.

Jens shakes his head, incidentally brushing their noses together. “It’s nothing special.”

“It is,” Lucas argues. “You are.”

Jens shuts his eyes and presses closer to him, swallowing around the sudden lump in his throat. They remain there for a moment before Lucas quietly says, “I want to talk to you, if that’s okay.”

It’s exactly what Jens had been hoping for, but it surprises him. His chest feels tight as he sets the keyboard aside and devotes his full attention to the other boy, who now avoids his gaze, nervously playing with his hands.

“You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to,” Jens reminds him. “But I’m listening. Nothing’s gonna scare me away.”

Lucas nods slightly, licking his lips. He lets out a shaky breath before straightening his shoulders and looking at Jens, resolute. “I know you don’t really understand why I stayed in Utrecht, or why I felt like it was my fault when my mom…” he trails off. Takes another breath. Starts again. “I didn’t tell you, but I fucked up before. After my dad left, everything was a little shitty. I couldn’t do it on my own, couldn’t even understand how to begin. I just needed to get away from it. I spent as much time as I could out of the house. With Kes and Jayden, at their houses or at parties, drinking and smoking. It wasn’t a big deal then, because it’s what we were all doing. I wasn’t just some rebellious, angry kid or something.”

He seems to falter, so Jens nods. Reminding him that he’s listening and also attempting to encourage him on. Jens presses closer, letting their knees bump before he takes Lucas’s hands in his own, rubbing his thumbs over the backs soothingly.

“I didn’t even think about how I was barely seeing her. I was always home late and she was always asleep early. Everything was fine, so I could keep ignoring it. I got home one night as usual and didn’t pay attention to the fact that the door was locked, or that it was unusually quiet. I was shitfaced, so I just went straight to bed. Imagine the fucking shock I had when my dad woke me up shouting the next morning.”

Lucas huffs, self-deprecating, and Jens resist the urge to pull him into his arms. Not yet.

“She was in the hospital,” he says quietly. “She’d downed half a bottle of pills and the neighbours found her. They’d had to call an ambulance. My dad was still her emergency contact. And I had no fucking idea about any of it.”

He looks up, eyes watery, and Jens pulls him in and holds onto him tightly. Lucas folds against his chest, tucking his head easily under his chin as he clings to Jens’s red hoodie. Jens strokes a hand down his face and presses a kiss to the top of his head, breaking down what he’d been told and trying to figure out how he’s supposed to respond.

“Fuck,” is what he eventually settles on. “I’m so sorry you had to go through that, Luc.”

Lucas shakes his head, gripping him tighter. “If I’d just been there, it wouldn’t have happened. I didn’t even know she wasn’t doing well. She was supposed to have someone who could watch out for the signs. She was supposed to be safe with me.”

Jens shakes his head, squeezing him, trying to convey comfort and reprimand all at once. “That’s not fair. None of that is on you. You don’t even know that you could have stopped it.”

“But I could have tried. I could have gotten to her sooner. I could have done something.”

It’s so adamant that Jens doesn’t feel like he can argue. He tries to put logic to it, but it doesn’t feel like something that can be broken down in such a way. He doesn’t think that’s what Lucas wants. He isn’t looking for pity or for Jens to excuse him.

Instead, Jens says, “I understand, Luc.”

Lucas presses closer to his chest, but finally glances up at him. Jens notes that though it had seemed like he would, Lucas hasn’t shed a tear.

Jens strokes his fingers down his cheek and presses a kiss to his forehead, watches him shut his eyes. “Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me.”

Lucas nods, swallowing slightly, tilting his head against Jens’s cheek. “I just—it was too hard to explain right away. It isn’t something I talk about often. I mean, it’s been over a year since it happened and she’s past it, but I’m not. It’s dumb. Getting rid of the guilt...it’s something I’ve worked at and failed on for so long. Going back to her now, and messing up the same way just reminded me of what happened then and I couldn’t let it happen again. I’ve tried so hard, Jens.”

Jens cups his neck and tilts his head back enough to press their foreheads together, sending only comfort now as he gives another nod. “I get it. I’m not mad, Luc. I never was.” He sighs, letting his own eyes close as he attempts to gather his thoughts. “It just scared me. I know that I fuck up easily. I say or do stupid things and I don’t always pay enough attention. I’ve made it hard for people before. I was worried I’d done the same to you.”

Lucas shakes his head against his. “Hey,” he coaxes, touching Jens’s cheek. “I didn’t leave because you made it hard and I didn’t ignore you because I don’t trust you. I went home to tell my friends how much I care about you and I fucked up while I was there. I didn’t want to be the reason anyone got hurt, and I thought the best way to protect you was to let you go. But I fucked up and I’m so, so sorry Jens.”

“Don’t be,” Jens murmurs. “Just promise me you’ll stay.”

He has a feeling that they aren’t done. He’s aware that even if there is truly no more to het out of Lucas, Jens has his own demons lingering between them. But right now, Lucas is in front of him. He can’t bring himself to care about anything else.

“I’m staying,” Lucas swears instantly. “My life is easiest with you in it.”

“I know I’m shit at this, too,” Jens whispers. “At talking about things, and just being honest. I know I can make it hard to trust me. But it—it’s been hard for me to trust anyone, too.”

Lucas strokes his cheek, nodding, expression pinched.

“But I trust you,” Jens admits.

Lucas swallows. “Nothing is hard with you. You’re the only thing I’ve ever been sure of,” he replies.

Jens kisses him, hard and unrelenting, and Lucas gives as good as he gets as he slides his hands under Jens’s hoodie.

[xyliane]

AUgust 7: HAVE YOU SEEN THIS 12 YEAR OLD

PROMPT THE SEVENTH: CHILDHOOD FRIENDS wait how can you childhood friends au killugon, I asked myself, forgetting that I had a whole-ass idea in my drafts already. this one’s a proper fic, too (minus editing cuz l o l it’s an AU writing challenge, not editing challenge). T, aged-up killugon, modern day au. ft ambiguous descriptions of social media, alluka, kalluto, and leorio in killua’s corner, and zushi and spinner in gon’s, brief discussion of getting plastered and dealing with a hangover. 5000 words.

0o0o0o0o0

The first sign that today is going to be an absolutely terrible day, is when Killua wakes up with a hangover.

This does not happen. Killua can count on one hand the number of times he’s gotten so drunk he’s had a hangover, and most of them are the fault of his little siblings. Little siblings who are now living together, whose couch he is currently painfully existing upon, half too hot and his toes way too cold. And the couch is too soft, an old secondhand thing he’d helped Alluka grapple up the stairs months ago after they found it outside an old dorm. He makes a notch in his very sore brain to blame the current situation on them. Kalluto might be kind enough to let a drunk big brother crash with them, but Alluka has a devious streak a mile wide.

Yeah. This is definitely their fault.

One eye slowly creaks open, surveying his surroundings through blurry vision. Nothing out of the ordinary here. He’s in the pajamas he’s left with Alluka forever ago, curled up under an old blanket he gave her for Nanika’s birthday. It’s covered in the Matrix code, all green letters on black wool. It barely covers him from chest to knees, which explains the cold toes.

Sunlight flickers through the curtains, cheerful and bright, and Killua pulls the blanket over his face. He’ll take cold toes over being blinded by his headache.

The second sign that today is going to be an absolutely terrible day, is when a noise like a chainsaw burrowing through a marshmallow erupts from his phone buzzing on the coffee table, just barely out of reach.

Killua attempts to bury himself under the blanket. He’s not dealing with work today.

And then he remembers: He doesn’t have work. Work can’t bother him today. Not just because it’s a weekend—work never respected the sanctity of weekends, no matter that he was at least partially in charge and used to have a fancy degree hanging on his wall. He doesn’t have work anymore. Killua quit.

Which, well. That explains the hangover.

He’s still blaming his siblings.

His phone buzzes loud enough to break the sound barrier, and Killua decides, fuck it. He doesn’t have anything to lose. If it’s the-place-formerly-known-as-work, he can delete everything. If it’s Mom or Father, he can definitely delete everything. And maybe it’s a friendly person, congratulating him on giving up a job that for anyone else would have been an absolute money-making dream. He’ll delete those too.

It takes a few tries to unlock his phone, and it unfortunately involves opening his eyes, squinting against the glaring light of the screen. But once he does, he frowns. Maybe he’s seeing double. Or a hundredfold. Because he should not have this many notifications.

awwww cute, i hope u 2 find each other! the top one says. It has several hundred likes. Why is it in his notifications?

Scrolling down reveals that it’s not an anomaly.

wtf man how can you find a TWELVE YEAR OLD from FIFTEEN YEARS AGO.

Me and my mom went on a cruise around there once, it was really pretty!

this is so sweet T__T maybe this is him?

And then another hundred photos of brown-skinned men with varying degrees of shirt-wearing, all black haired and most of them buff in very appealing ways and all of them beaming at Killua.

“What the fuck,” Killua croaks as he scrolls through all of the images and messages. Maybe this is a dream. A really weird, hangover-induced dream about how little of a social life he has, that his phone is possessed by someone else’s. A warning of sorts, that he should never have installed any social media on his phone ever, not even for hookups.

The reason for all the notifications lies at the top of his own page. Just a few sentences, all-caps, with an image of an old crinkled photo of two boys on a tropical beach, grinning at the camera. Killua sees himself, white curly hair flying in all directions and pale skin sunburned and ruddy with the briny wind, happier than Killua can ever remember being. Next to him, one arm slung around his shoulders and the other holding a bucket full of seashells, is a brown-skinned boy with freckles dancing across his nose and the tops of his shoulders, brown eyes wide and laughing and black hair thick and spiked from some mix of wind and seawater and natural gravity defiance.

He didn’t know he still had this photo. It had followed him from childhood all the way through grad school, a carefully guarded keepsake hidden away from the watchful eyes of his parents and Illumi, before ending up in a box or a bag at some point in the last few years. Part of Killua thought he’d lost it in the move. He barely remembers much about being twelve, about the cruise he’d been forcibly dragged on. But he remembers…

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS BOY? yells the caption. WE WERE BEST FRIENDS FOR A WEEK WHEN I GOT DRAGGED ON A CRUISE BY MY ASSHOLE PARENTS. HE WAS 12 ON WHALE ISLAND 15 YEARS AGO. IF FOUND, DM IMMEDIATELY.

“Gon,” Killua breathes.

He gathers himself, wrapping the blanket around his head in a feeble protection against the morning, and lurches over to Alluka’s room.

He gets to bang on her door three times, confused spite winning out over his own pounding headache, before Kalluto appears out of their room, blinking blearily at Killua. “Shut up.”

Killua kicks Alluka’s door for good measure, and brandishes his phone in front of him like a weapon. “Not until you explain what the hell this is doing on the internet.”

Kalluto pales, then flushes, then pales again. “Oh. Um.”

At that, Alluka creaks her door open, guilty blue eyes far too awake for how close to noon it is. Killua kind of wants to kill her on principle alone. If he has to be hungover, so does everyone else.

“Explain,” he grinds out through his teeth.

The third and final sign that today is going to be an absolutely terrible day, is when Alluka puts on her most winning smile, the kind she uses to ward off angry customers and idiotic faux-academics on the internet. “Congratulations, Brother! I might have made you go viral.”

Killua throws his phone at her.

—————

Today’s going to be a good day, Gon decides. He’s been in the forests of East Gorteau for the better part of a month, which normally isn’t so bad. But this group has been…They’re nice enough, when Gon’s not spending half of his time explaining that, no, that species of plant does not make a good stew, and no, that species is endangered please don’t hunt them, and yes Gon is sure he doesn’t date his clients even after the hike, and no the reason the tent fell over again is because it wasn’t properly set up in the first place—

All of Aunt Mito’s complaints about tourists on Whale Island make so much more sense, now that Gon’s leading backwoods hikes.

But last night had been fun! Spinner had met the group at a pre-set campsite not far from their pickup so Gon hadn’t had to work the whole night, and he could relax with his friend over good food, more alcohol than he probably should have drunk, and not having to explain to Mrs. Yuldvin the difference between marijuana, buckeye, and poison oak again. Spinner had even taken care of the fire, although she had left him to rescue the Podomos siblings from the ruins of their tent with nothing more than a smirk and a wave. Nevertheless, Gon smiled through his headache all morning, because soon he’ll be home, and he can sleep.

Zushi is waiting in the parking lot once Gon’s done packing up the last of the gear and saying goodbye to Spinner, jeep idling while he flicks through his phone, thick eyebrows drawn together in increasing concern. He doesn’t even look up until Gon drops his pack onto the hood of the car, and he jolts so badly in surprise that he tosses his phone in the air.

“Are you okay?” Gon asks, and tries to peek at the screen.

Zushi pulls it up and away, a frantic look in his eyes. It won’t really keep Gon from seeing what’s happening, not if he wants to, but Zushi’s height is enough of a deterrent to make it hard. “You were gone way too long,” he says.

Gon leans against the hot metal of Zushi’s car. It wasn’t an unusual length for a trip, not really—this backcountry needs the length to be able to see and understand the region. Not to mention the Small Billed Swan preservation society keeping the whole place locked down except to authorized guides and trekkers. Zushi knows this. They’ve been roommates long enough that this isn’t even the longest time Gon’s been gone.

“You knew I’d be gone til today,” Gon says.

“Yeah, but…” Zushi’s eyebrows descend even further, scrunching his whole face up in worry. “You haven’t checked your phone, right?”

“No?” Even if he did have cell service, Gon never brings his own phone. He borrows Kite’s satellite phone, because it is more reliable and doesn’t need to be charged constantly.

“Okay. Well.” Zushi takes a deep breath, then another, one of Wing’s old meditation techniques. Despite his exhaustion and single-minded determination to sink into a real bed and sleep for a week, Gon feels a minor pang of worry. On breath three, he unlocks his phone and turns it towards Gon. “You’re a meme.”

On Zushi’s screen is a photo Gon can’t ever forget about. Backed by Whale Island’s sunbleached white beaches and the humid brilliant colors of summer, Gon sees himself—twelve, smiling from ear to ear, hair a mess from swimming and his shirt practically covered in sand from digging up all the seashells in his bucket. He’s got an arm around another boy, who’s caught mid-laugh so his blue eyes burn the same color as the sky, white curls even messier than Gon’s hair. They look like they’ve known each other their whole lives, like they’d still be best friends even if they haven’t seen or spoken to each other since the photo was taken.

Gon hopes Killua thinks so, too.

He cradles the phone in his hand, carefully zooming in on their faces and the errant crinkles visible through the photo. His own faded copy is in a drawer, having survived a whole trip around the world and countless apartment jumps. This one looks just as well cared for, in its own way.

“That…is you, right?” Zushi asks carefully. “Because Wing was asking, and half of Kite’s guide company is yelling about it on your social media page that you don’t even use, and now people are messaging me, and they’re saying the weirdest things, and the post is from last week, so—”

“It’s Killua,” Gon says. A smile spreads across his face, a mirror to the one he’d had when he was twelve. “That’s Killua!”

“Who?” the others ask, but Gon isn’t listening.

He spins, frantically searching his pockets for his phone. “Spinner, can you do me a favor?”

She narrows her eyes suspiciously.

Gon knew today was going to be a good day.

—————

It’s been a week, and Killua has quit all social media forever.

The steady buzz of his phone informing the apartment of his notifications is not his problem. Alluka’s the one who decided to hack into his phone and post something to his old public account, the one he mostly uses for photos of cats and complaining about terrible business precedents. He hasn’t posted much since school, and if anything, it should have simply vanished into the void of the internet.

He finds the culprit fairly quickly, and for once it’s not his sister’s moderate but dedicated video following.

“Old man, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

Leorio lounges in Alluka and Kalluto’s living room, freshly out of his scrubs and looking pleased as all hell. “I just reblogged a fun post from my friend,” he says somewhat defensively. “You were a cute kid, Killua. What happened?”

Killua feels a growl creep up his throat. “You can’t just do that,” he snaps.

“It’s not my fault the people like my well-coiffed but rugged appearance and dedication to social justice in medicine.”

“You have 500,000 followers because you made a joke post two years ago, and some authorized user reblogged it five times. It has nothing to do with your ugly mug.” If Killua squints and plugs his ears, he can even see why people think Leorio’s attractive or whatever: tan skin, lean but strong as hell, actually takes care of his hair, not to mention a damn good doctor with one of the most prestigious institutions in Yorknew who spends most of his free time running health clinics in impoverished neighborhoods. That’s all swell. But then he starts talking, and Killua has no idea where the off button is.

Leorio spreads a hand out, gesturing vaguely with the glass of iced tea that he’d helped himself to out of Alluka’s stash. “It has everything to do with my ‘ugly mug,’” he says. “Which is why I used my powers for good and spread your post. Don’t you want to find him?”

“Not like this!”

“You were not going to find him at all,” Kalluto’s quiet voice pipes up from the kitchen. They have night classes tonight, but Killua has a feeling that even if they were supposed to be attending their Yorknew Uni lectures, they would still be here making Killua’s life worse. “You’ve had that picture for years, and you did not even try to look.”

Leorio gives him a judgmental look over the tops of his stupid tiny glasses. “You haven’t?”

It would be a losing game to bury his burning face in one of the throw pillows, so Killua does his best to cross his arms over his chest and glower instead. “I…tried.”

“And?”

“I don’t even know his last name!” Killua splutters. “I didn’t have his number or where he was from, other than his mom worked on the ship. And that cruiseline went bankrupt and liquidated everything before I could get out of the house, so I couldn’t even look that up.”

Kalluto crosses over from the kitchen and perches like a sweatshirt-wearing crow on the coffee table, their blue eyes carefully neutral under straight black bangs. “Alluka and Nanika would have helped. Or even Milluki, if you had explained the situation.”

“I was eighteen, okay? I just left home, and our parents were still being…shit, themselves, I guess.” He hadn’t even considered asking for help. Then again, he’d tried the moment he could, that first summer of undergrad where he didn’t have to come home and Illumi couldn’t spend half his time breathing down the back of Killua’s neck. He had a general idea of where they’d gone, maps of islands scurried away in the closet with the old photo and a bag full of seashells Gon had given him as a going-away present.

They’d been friends for a week, in the whirlwind way that only kids can be. The cruise ship was massive, and Killua’s parents were in meetings half the time and playing nice with the other rich people on board the other half. Killua had been bored witless, and Gon was everything he couldn’t have possibly imagined: encouraging Killua to go exploring, to stealing food from the kitchens, making him help clean up the decks, playing cards with the deckhands. Sneaking off the boat to visit an island without Killua’s parents while the ship was docked, scrambling over the burning hot sands and dashing through the jungle, diving into the waves fully clothed and competing to see who could find the biggest prettiest shells. Gon’d been Killua’s first friend, his first crush, his first…a lot of firsts.

Then the cruise had ended, and Killua forgot to give Gon his phone number. His address. Anything. They’d been so swept up in being friends, being best friends, it had seemed impossible that they would never see each other again.

Does Gon even remember? Why should he, when Killua hasn’t contacted him? Would they even be friends anymore?

Maybe he hadn’t searched hard enough. But part of Killua thinks he shouldn’t have tried at all.

The phone buzzes loudly, and Killua tries not to flinch.

“Hey, Killua. It’s okay.” Leorio leans forward, hands clasped over his too-long limbs and expression gentle. “If you want me to delete it, I will. Not sure I can help with the viral part of things, except maybe go through your messages and delete the gross ones, or at least find the weirdest ones for you to laugh at later.”

“Alluka and I have been doing this already,” Kalluto says, their posture a little too protective for Killua’s raw nerves at this point. “But perhaps you have some suggestions for what to do next, Dr. Paladiknight?”

Leorio smiles sympathetically. “Don’t read the comments? That said, most of your comments have been much more positive than anything I usually post. The masses seem to be genuinely rooting for you, kid.”

“I have only had to delete a dozen lewd messages for you this morning,” Kalluto adds, not mentioning the hundred or so that Alluka took care of yesterday.

Killua’s traitorous phone buzzes again, and that’s it. Time to bury himself in a pillow. Killua flops onto the couch, narrowly missing Leorio, and does his best to burrow into the cushions. “That’s just great,” he says into the fabric.

A comforting hand rubs against his hair, messing up the curls for a moment, and Killua refuses to admit that it’s nice, that he has friends like Leorio who even bother to care. “It could be worse. You could be dealing with this while still working a soul-sucking job making more money than most of us will see in our lifetimes, in exchange for giving up all of your morals.”

Killua groans loudly. “I’m not having this conversation with you.”

“You’re gonna need to do something, Killua! And hey, I might be able to set something up with my—”

“I already told you, no.”

“But it’s what you’re good at. And you wouldn’t be fucking people over to do it.”

“No.”

“Just listen for one—”

Killua lifts his head enough to glare as murderously as he can at Leorio. It must work at least a little, because the doctor shuts up.

Meanwhile, Kalluto is scrolling through Killua’s phone, poking at the screen occasionally. In the awkward silence, their sharp gasp is loud enough to shatter a window, and they hurriedly shove the phone in the pocket of their oversized sweatshirt.

Leorio raises an eyebrow. “Everything okay?”

Kalluto squeezes their eyes shut for a moment, then carefully places the phone on the coffee table, screen pointed innocently at the ceiling. “You will want to look at this one, Brother.”

“This isn’t another erotic sandcastle is it?” he says.

Kalluto shakes their head, and Killua’s stomach lurches up his throat. Alluka has been the one excited about this whole thing. But Kalluto, as reserved as they are, is a massive romantic. The whole thing might be Alluka’s fault, but Killua knows it’s Kalluto who almost lets themselves believe it’ll work. Despite all of the false positives, the people who send messages that don’t sound right or photos that have the wrong smile.

Killua doesn’t want to hope. It can’t possibly be Gon. But his hands shake nonetheless as he unlocks his phone and finds a new message in his DMs.

It’s not from Gon.

Instead, someone with the icon of a small-billed white swan in a soft small-billed hat and a handle of @flymypretties has sent a photo of a brown-skinned man with spiky black hair absolutely covered in dirt and grime. He’s waving at the camera, a backpacking bag propped against his shoulder and the widest smile Killua has ever seen beaming straight through the screen and into his chest. Next to him and half out of frame, a tall tanned man with massive black eyebrows and a tank top showing off an impressive amount of muscle has his head in his hands. Killua feels a sharp stab of sympathy, somewhere buried beneath the racing of his heart.

look im sorry about this but this idiot can’t find his phone and we r kind of in the middle of nowhere so reception’s shit. he wants to know if you admit he found the biggest seashell on the beach, whatever that means.

For a long, long moment—seconds? minutes maybe?—Killua can do nothing but stare at the screen of his phone. Leorio and Kalluto both look at him with a mix of curiosity and worry, Kalluto starting to slowly reach for the phone.

In a completely childish protective moment, Killua grabs it against his chest, like the image will vanish if he doesn’t keep it close.

“Is it…?” Leorio asks.

Killua swallows heavily, trying to think around the roaring of the ocean in his ears. “I think so,” he says faintly.

Kalluto’s eyes widen, and they spin on their heels towards their room. “I’m calling Alluka!”

—————

“Has he responded?”

“No!”

“…what about now?”

Spinner throws her hands in the air so violently that her hat falls off. “For god’s sake, Gon, it’s been an hour, you don’t even have your phone, and you still need to go home.”

Gon huffs and pouts. They’re still in the parking lot over an hour after the rest of the trekking group has left, and all the exhaustion that had settled into Gon’s body from the tour has been turned into a jittery energy that keeps trying to leak out from under his skin. He wants to go home immediately and dig out his copy of the photo, rub out the old fingerprints he and Aunt Mito have left on it over the years. He wants to find his phone and message Killua directly. He wants to wait right here until Killua responds, no matter how long it takes.

He knows it’s childish, to be this selfish. Spinner has work to do, work that she already put on hold to help with the last day of the tour. Kite probably will want to know what’s happening, or at least why his lead guide and his chief guide organizer have been stuck in a parking lot. And Gon can practically feel Zushi’s obsessive scrolling through social media, frantically trying to navigate Gon’s feeds without actually having access.

Gon needs to find his phone.

“Spinner, what if—”

It’s not that Spinner’s a large woman. Out of the three people standing in the parking lot, Zushi’s far and away the strongest, even if he is about as threatening as a large, muscular teddy bear. And Gon has only packed on weight and muscle over his years of backpacking around the wilderness, no matter that he’s not super tall. But Spinner goes for longer, harder treks on her own than anyone but Kite, and she packs in her own climbing gear on top of that, so when she tosses Gon into the back of Zushi’s jeep, he flies.

“Zushi,” she says in a low exhausted snarl, and he jumps right off the hood of his car. Gon probably would have felt bad for him, if everything wasn’t spinning. “If you do not take your roommate home, I am not responsible for the consequences.”

“What if you hear back?” Gon groans around the aches in his side.

Spinner rolls her eyes, and Gon knows she’s just tired. “I’ll let you know.”

“But what if my phone’s gone? What will I do if someone stole it, or if I can’t—”

“I’ll call you go home already,” she says, and slams the door shut on his face.

For a long moment, the only sound is Spinner storming away, boots thudding heavily in the dirt until her car door slams.

The jeep shifts slightly as Zushi quietly lowers himself into the driver’s seat and puts the key into the ignition. Gon wants to tell him to follow Spinner, so she can yell out the window as soon as Killua gets back to her. But Zushi looks about ready to bolt. So Gon slumps back in the seat, the rumble of tires crunching through gravel making his already jittery nerves shake.

A small voice that sounds a lot like Kite tells Gon that it’s better to wait, that it will be easier to have a conversation and determine if this really is Killua after a rest and a shower.

Gon doesn’t want that, though. He wants…

It’s been a long time since he was on Whale Island. Longer still since he saw Killua. That doesn’t mean he stopped thinking about either of them, during the quiet moments out under the stars. They’re part of him, like his lungs are part of him—essential and irreplaceable, buried so far inside that removing them would change him irrevocably.

What is Killua like now? Is Gon just as important to him as he is to Gon? He has to be. Right?

They make it home without saying anything else. Gon floats in and out between bone-deep weariness and electric sparks of nervous joy, and Zushi flinches every time Gon jolts himself from one to the other.

“Hey, are you…I mean, maybe not okay, but.”

Gon lifts his chin up sharply at the sound of his roommate’s voice, and notices the familiar apartment complex in front of him. Oh, they’re home. “I’m good,” he says, and grins.

“Sure,” Zushi says like he doesn’t believe Gon.

A dubious silence stretches out between them as they gather the rest of the gear, dropping it in a heap on the sidewalk. “You were kids, though,” Zushi finally says.

Gon shrugs and slams the door shut hard enough to make the vehicle rattle. “I didn’t forget. So I don’t think Killua would, either.”

Zushi’s eyebrows wrinkle on each other, like they can’t decide whether to go up or down and settle on some combination of the two. “What if he did?”

“He didn’t,” Gon says, more sure of that than anything else in his life.

Zushi’s eyebrows dance again, but he doesn’t say anything else.

Between Gon’s camping gear and Zushi’s leftover practice pads, it takes longer than Gon’s excitement can take to get everything settled enough to look for his phone. Well, Gon would have liked to look for his phone, but Zushi makes a pointed look at the shower. There are only so many places the phone could be in the whole apartment, after all.

Gon’s just drying off when Zushi knocks on the door. “I found it, but it’s dead,” he says, voice muffled.

“Then charge it!” Gon shouts. After a moment, he adds, quieter and less snappishly, “Please?”

A faint laugh echoes through the apartment.

By the time Gon can make himself a very early dinner of whatever he could grab out of the cabinets without thinking, the phone is charged enough to turn on. Sure enough, there are a wide variety of messages, mostly from Kite’s groupchat asking about the viral post. A few are from former hikers, people who Gon liked enough to share contact info, offering to see if they can get in touch. There are even a few—okay, how did they get ahold of his old social media page? It’s practically defunct, since Gon’s never had a phone capable of more than the most basic apps. And those are…

It’s flattering in a way, but Gon’s not really into that. Or them.

Zushi catches sight of the grimace, and takes one look over Gon’s shoulder before turning beet red.

By the time he’s gone through and deleted the vast majority of what had been filling up his phone, there’s still no message from Spinner, and nothing at all from Killua. Gon sighs and lies his head down on the table with a heavy thunk.

The other chair scrapes heavily along the tiles as Zushi sits, a mug of coffee in his hands. “What will you do? When he messages you, I mean.”

When, not if, an unexpected certainty coming from Zushi. Gon has the best friends in the world. “Talk to him,” Gon says. “It’s only been fifteen years, right? We promised we’d be friends forever.”

“A lot changes in fifteen years,” Zushi says.

“Not that.”

“Then why didn’t you look for him?”

Gon frowns. It had taken a long, long time, but Aunt Mito managed to track down the cruise captain the last time they were in port, tracing through old charters until the right names came up. But when she’d called them up, she’d been met with stonewall after stonewall, pleasant-sounding voices insisting in no uncertain terms that she would never speak with a member of Killua’s family, let alone let her son speak to his friend. By the time Gon was old enough to look himself, he found nothing but a mansion full of people whose eyes matched Killua’s in everything except for his warmth, who refused to even acknowledge Gon’s presence except to throw him out.

That had been years ago. It’s not that Gon stopped looking. Not exactly.

“I did, but I—” Gon starts to say, but his phone buzzes violently against the table, and they both jump out of their chairs.

“Is it—?” Zushi asks, breath in his throat.

It’s a message from Spinner. you owe me big time, kid, she says, followed by a phone number.

Gon rips his phone off the cable, a wide smile spreading across his face. “It is,” he says, and dials Killua.

—————

bzz bzz—

bzz bzz—

bzz b—

“H-hello?”

“Killua! Hi!”

“…Gon? Is that—It’s really…?”

“Killua, it’s you, I thought I’d never—”

“I did find the biggest seashell, and you know it.”

A breath, sharp and astonished. “The blue and white one, with green lines.”

“I found it, and I gave it to you.”

“I still have it.”

A snort of amusement, slightly damp. “I know. You promised you’d keep it.”

“I did. And I promised—”

“That we’d be friends forever.”

A laugh, delighted and teary at the same time. “I knew you remembered.”

“I did promise you that I would.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

(AUgust prompts)

[teacup-set]

halcyon days

Summary: The sea rages as it yearns for its lover, but for one fortnight each year, it's perfectly still. [SasuSaku, Mythical!AU]

FFN, AO3

AN: I wrote this story a long while ago, but got around to editing it recently while shifting my work to AO3, so decided to give it one more chance on here.

x

I sit on the warm, white sand and watch my mother and father embrace moments before my father is to embark on a sea voyage. She softly kisses his cheek and he offers her a reassuring smile as he walks back to the dock, where countless men work on countless ships, inspecting every nook and crevice to ensure that the vessel is ready for the sea.

My mother joins the rest of the women as they all wave their hands in goodbyes and shout good wishes. It is only an empty ritual though, everyone knows that for fourteen days around the winter solstice the sea is absolutely calm and still. Only a gentle sea breeze races across the water’s surface, filling the sails of the ships and spraying droplets of water into the air where they catch the rays of the sun and explode into iridescent colors.

A legend dictates that any man who sets sail between the seven days before the winter solstice and the seven days after would find his way back to his lover's arms unharmed, which is why my people chose this day to embark on a voyage.

But it's not like they could have chosen any other day. For these fourteen days the sea is calm, but for the rest of the year, it rages. Mother says the sea is clawing at the land in longing, because something it loves lives here. Tide after tide attack the shore with such ferocity that it is impossible to dwell anywhere near the sea.

Which is why my tribe lives in the very heart of wave country, far away from the enraged sea, and only travel down here once a year. The beach is barren and soulless, save for one house over the low cliff.

My eyes trail away from the departing seamen and glance over to my left, where the old man who lives in the cliff-top abode is sitting on a boulder, something close to relief reflected on his face.

He's been living in that hut for more years than I've been born, but somehow the waves never seem to touch his little home.

I've seen him walking along the beach before, with an uchiwa fan sewn onto the back of his Yukata. I recognize it, it's the emblem of the Uchiha tribe, the fire wielders from the land of leaves, so why did this old man reside in wave country?

I see grandma Ino slowly walking towards me, and I make up my mind to ask her about the mysterious old man. She seems about as old as he does, perhaps she has some answers.

It takes another few moments for her old, frail knees to carry her to the spot where I am sitting, and as soon as she reaches she settles down at a spot behind me and weaves her fingers through my hair.

I inherited her long, pale blonde hair and she loved to weave it into elaborate braids, while I enjoy the welcome pressure of her fingertips on my scalp. She sets to work, parting and twisting my hair, and I finally ask her the question that had been ricocheting inside my head.

"Ino baa-chan," I say, "Who is that man sitting on the rocks over there? The one who lives by the sea?"

Even though I cannot see her face, I know she is smiling and I can hear it in her voice when she speaks.

"Mira, did you know, there was once a time that the sea was calm and quiet all year round?"

I'm a little annoyed, because she doesn't answer my question, but her words have piqued my curiosity. "Really, baa-chan? This fearsome sea?" I ask.

"Aa," she says, and I can tell she is still smiling "This very sea."

"What changed, then?"

As soon as I said those words, her hands became still, and I know she is going to tell me a story. I don’t not mind though, Ino baa-chan tells the best stories, so I remove my legs from underneath me, turn to face her, and sit down in a more comfortable, cross legged position.

She inhales deeply, and with a faraway look in her eyes, she begins...

x

A young woman sits on the rocks by the sea, looking out at the endless expanse of water before her. Her long coral hair cascades down her shoulders in soft waves as she rests her head in the palm of her hand and smiles softly.

The trance she is lost in is interrupted when she hears a distressed mewling in the distance. White dress flowing in the wind, she gets up and breaks into a run towards the sound, coming to halt when she sees a dolphin beached on the shore and a man hovering over it.

She opens her mouth to yell at him, and ask him to stop what he was doing, before promptly shutting it close when she realizes that he's trying to drag the fish back into the water, not to the land.

Quickly, she rushes over to him, and they both heave and grunt as they try to push the beast back into the sea. The man's eyes widen in surprise when the tide reaches in farther into the shore and takes the dolphin with it as it returns to the sea.

They watch as the dolphin wades through the shallow water until it finally reaches the deep, and then swims away in search of its pod. 

"Thank you for helping her,” she says, smiling sweetly, “What's your name?", but it takes him a long minute to grasp what she has spoken because he is stunned by the changing colors of her eyes, every single one of them a different shade of green. When his senses return to him, he covers his surprise with a cough and then answers, "Aa. Something that belongs to the sea must return to the sea. I could not watch it suffer." he pauses, "My name is Sasuke."

Her smile widens a little and she moves closer to him. Standing on her toes, she presses her lips to his in a soft, chaste kiss and his eyes fall close at the delightful pressure. When he opens them again, she is gone, and there's only the taste of salt on his lips.

.

.

The man with the dark hair and darker eyes returns to the same spot the next day, a little while before the sun immerses itself into the sea, and waits in hopes of seeing the roseate woman from yesterday.

He waits and waits until the sea swallows the sun and the sky turns a rich black, punctuated with stars glowing dimmer than the green eyes of the mysterious woman. He has almost abandoned hope and is about to return to his lodgings, when the sea on the far end of the beach swirls into a tiny whirlpool and out emerges the woman from yesterday.

He watches in awe as the water parts and makes way for her to come to the shore, and before he can ever recall commanding them to move, his feet are shuffling to the woman who was born from the sea.

He approaches her, and if she has noticed his presence, she doesn't acknowledge it. Caught off guard by her dismissal, he ponders how to approach her.

"Hello..." he begins somewhat unsurely. She stills, hands that were untangling seaweed from her hair falling to her sides, as she stares at him dumbstruck. 

"Y-you can see me?" she says, sounding surprised.

Frowning, he counters. "Should I not be able to?"

She laughs a little, and his heart flutters at the sound. "Most people can't. I am only seen by those looking for me." she says, looking into his eyes.

His frown only deepens, and she looks like she understands the questions swimming through his mind. Grabbing hold of his left hand, she brings it to her chest. His eyes widen when instead of a heartbeat, he can feel the vibrations of waves thundering within her rib cage.

"I am a sea goddess." she says with a smile.

.

.

The goddess and the man spend the rest of the night talking away as the goddess explains to him how her mother is the ruler of the oceans, and how her and each of her six sisters rule a portion of the seas. He wonders if he ought to be more surprised at this discovery of a whole new world, but something deep-seated within him believes every word she says without question. 

They talk until the sky is streaked red and the goddess tells him she must return to the sea. Standing up, she turns to him and says "Goodbye, Sasuke-kun. I really did enjoy our time together, I hope we can do this again some day." Turning around, she begins walking back into the sea.

"Wait!" his voice calls her, laced with slight panic at the realization that despite talking all night he was still missing a crucial piece of information, "You never gave me your name" she stops in her stride and turns to look at him.

"For when we meet again." he adds.

Her eyes twinkle as she answers. "Sakura."

.

.

They begin to meet often after that night. They would lie on the soft sand and talk under the cover of the stars as the sea goddess played a beautiful symphony with the sound of the waves.

More often than not, it would be her who did all the talking. She would tell him about life underwater, the conflicts among the gods, stories from the wars she had witnessed in her centuries of existence. But every now and then, he'd share pieces of his life with her too and she would greedily absorb every piece of information he would impart.

He told her about his hometown in the land of leaves and how he was living with his brother's friend in wave country to help him build a bridge, he told her about his childhood, his family, he speaks with a passion about the fire she had been afraid of all her life, and about the flowers she was named after.

He was surprised to learn that despite being named Sakura, she had never actually seen cherry blossoms in bloom. "I can't stray too far from the sea." she told him, "but I hope to see them someday."

He nods.

A few weeks later, the bridge is built and his work in wave country is done. On his last night in wave country, as they sit on the beach, they don't speak a word. Somewhere in the middle of the night, he takes his hand in hers and they sit there watching the waves roll in.

When the sun begins to return to its place in the sky, she finally turns to him and speaks. "I'm afraid I might be in love with you."

For a very long time he is silent, and she feels her heart sink like a stone in the water. Just before he gets up to leave, he tightly squeezes her small hand.

"Do not be afraid, for I think I might be in love with you too."

.

.

That night is not the last they see of each other. At every chance he got, the fire heir would run to wave country to spend a few days wrapped in the arms of the sea goddess.

In the spring he brought her a book filled with the stories of the land, and a single cherry blossom flower pressed in between.

In his absence, the goddess shares her loneliness with the god of the wind, Naruto-kami. Legend says that the ruler of the skies was also once in love with a mortal, blind woman, and so could sympathize with her pain.

He could never marry her because of the wrath it would incur from heaven, so he loved her in secret. He fathered a child with the marble eyed woman, and the child was born with the same white eyes as his mother but with vision that surpassed any mortal. His unique vision was carried on by his progeny and gave rise to the famed Hyuga clan.

After the woman succumbed to mortality, the wind god never wed in all the centuries that followed.

.

.

The sea goddess and her lover steal many nights and days together, basking in each other's love, but a storm begins to brew in the sea.

The eldest sister of the goddess learns about her affair with the mortal and is enraged. Unable to stand the unnatural connection of a mortal and an immortal, she informs the heavens of her sister's misdeeds.

A summit of the gods is organized at once to address her crimes.

"What you are doing is unacceptable!" the overseer of the council tells her, "It simply cannot be!"

But the goddess stands defiant. "I love him" she says, "and that will not change."

"A mortal and an immortal are not destined to be together, such is the law." he insists and the goddess watches the wind god standing behind the council of gods wince as if in pain.

She can see the pain that reflects in his cerulean blue eyes and she knows it's not a pain she would be able to bear.

"Then, gods, I give up my immortality." she declares.

Gasps echo all across the room as the gods break into hushed whispers.

"Tsunade! Do you hear your daughter? Will you allow this?" the ruler of heaven barks at the queen of the sea.

The mighty sea goddess stares into her daughter's defiant eyes for a long time, her inner conflict betrayed on her pained face. Then, she sighs — "All I want is my daughter's happiness, and if she has found it in a mortal then so be it."

Sakura looks at her mother's eyes and hopes the unshed tears in her eyes will convey her apology as Tsunade leaves her throne and chants a spell. The next instant there is a blinding pain wracking every inch of the younger goddess's body as she feels her soul being incinerated and remodeled again. Through the pain she opens her eyes and glances at Naruto, his eyes a mix of pride and regret, and she knows she has made the right choice.

The pain is eventually too much to bear and she feels her consciousness slipping. When she awakens, she is at the beach where she met her lover.

She extends her hand to the sea, and it does not respond.

.

.

She spends the next week waiting for her lover to return. An old widow grants her shelter, and Sakura visits the beach every night anticipating Sasuke's return.

The night they are united, she quickly runs into his arms and buries her face in his sturdy chest.

"Sakura? What's wrong?" he asks, his voice laced with worry.

Breathless, she tells him about all the things that had conspired, down to the ultimatum that heaven presented her with. His eyes widen and he holds his breath as he waits to hear her choice. Wordlessly, she takes his palm and presses it to her chest, just like she did when they met for the second time.

He hears her heart thrumming beneath his touch.

.

.

He sends a messenger back to his hometown to convey he would be late in returning this time, and spends the next few weeks by his lover's side.

They stay at a local inn and every morning he would disappear, and return to her at night tired and weary. She questioned where he would go, but he only asked her to be patient. At the end of three weeks, he took her back to the beach and showed her a small wooden house near the edge of the cliff, overlooking the water.

"I built this. For us." he said.

With tears streaking her face she wraps her arms around him and mouths a question into his chest. "How can we stay here? Your life is in the land of leaves."

"My life," he holds her equally tightly, "is where you are. And your life is where the sea is."

She sobs in his embrace.

"I don't know how to repay you." she says, her voice hoarse.

"Marry me."

.

.

They decide on a spring wedding. Two weeks before their wedding, he tells her he must visit home one last time to inform his family and to take care of some business.

He returns to wave country two days before the wedding. It's a simple, short ceremony and that night when they retire to their house by the sea, he gives her a hollow quartz necklace with a liquid inside.

"It's the essence of cherry blossoms. You will always smell like them." he tells her.

Smiling a brilliant, blinding smile, she lets him clasp the necklace around her neck.

.

.

Peace reigns over the couple as they share three years of marital bliss, their love for each other only growing with each day that passed.

But things took a turn for the worse when Sasuke returned home one day clutching a piece of paper in his hand and something akin to desperation swimming in his eyes.

"What is it? What's wrong, Sasuke-kun?" Sakura is immediately filled with worry.

"It's a letter from home." He explains "My brother is missing. He went to the Ame islands, but he has not returned. I must go find him."

As soon as he finishes his revelation, Sakura shakes her head violently. "No, no, no, no." she insists. "You can't go to Ame. My sister rules those seas, Sasuke, she's violent and she hates me. You won't make it back alive."

But even as she says those words, she knows they will have no effect. Sasuke's love for his brother was as boundless as her sister's hate for her. He would stop at nothing to save him, she knows, so she asks for something different.

"Take me with you. Please. You cannot leave me here." she begs.

"No, Sakura. I won't put you in any needless danger. I will go alone." his answers decisively.

She cries and begs and pleads, but the fire wielder is resolute. For the first time in all the time she had known him, when he held her close to stop her tears, she found no comfort in his arms.

.

.

Sasuke's ship sets sail three days from that day, and until that time they spend every waking moment wrapped up in each other.

When the day finally arrives, she kisses him softly on his lips, wishes him well, and folds her hands to utter the same prayer to the sea that people used to recite to her years ago.

.

.

The sailing is smooth for most part of the journey, and he thinks perhaps he'll actually make it back to the arms of his beautiful wife, but things begin to turn sinister as the ship approaches the territory of the Sea Goddess's eldest daughter.

Large waves slam against the hull of the ship, and the waters around it begin to swirl, first lazily, then with rigor, trapping the vessel in a massive whirlpool. All men aboard the ship cling to its sides, holding on for dear life as it sways violently, mouthing prayers to the sea goddess. But there is only one name on Sasuke's lips.

"Sakura..."

A mammoth wave slams into the side of the ship, destroying its left completely, tossing the men overboard into the waiting waters. They collide with each other and the ship’s debris as the whirlpool twirls them around violently.

There's a loud roar of gushing blood in Sasuke's ears and a fire growing in his lungs as he tries to keep his head above the water. There's a sting of salt along his left thigh and he thinks there's a deep gash there left by one of the ship's sphincters, but the pain fades into insignificance as he imagines his wife standing on the shores, awaiting his return.

He fights with renewed vigor, but in his heart he knows this is the end. He nears the center of the whirlpool and immediately feels a strong tug trying to pull him under. Expending every last ounce of energy he fights the suction, but he's only one man against a mighty sea and the water overwhelms him, engulfing him completely.

Immediately, the waters on the surface lapse back into stillness. But the fire in his lungs has spread to every single cell in his body and Sasuke knows he will not see the shore again.

Sinking slowly, he closes his eyes and says a prayer to the queen of the sea.

"Let my body wash to the shore. Let my wife not wait an eternity in vain..."

In the heavens, Tsunade let a solitary tear glide down the curve of her cheek as she willed the currents to carry the body of the man who loved her daughter back to her footsteps.

.

.

Sakura is in restless slumber when her eyes shoot open. The moon is missing from the sky but the tide is high, and her heart is beating wildly in her chest like a panicked animal in a cage. Her breath comes out in rapid succession and she knows, she just knows something has gone terribly wrong.

In the middle of the night, she runs down the rocky path to the beach, unmindful of the cold wind flapping her hair and nightdress around. She runs and runs and runs without pausing to breathe and only slows down when she sees the outline of a body near the water.

"No. Oh gods, NO!" she says as she picks up pace again.

Her knees fold underneath her as she lowers herself near the limp body. Stretching her hand, she turns his face towards her, and all the tears that had been gathering in her eyes since she awakened trickled down like waterfalls as her eyes recognized the face she woke up next to for years.

Holding his face to her chest, a broken cry erupts from her throat.

.

.

The first rays of the sun found Sakura still on the beach, clutching the body of her beloved, chanting his name like a mantra.

Her voice begins to crack and her face becomes stiff from dried up tears. She looks to the skies and screams,

"Please, give Sasuke back to me. I beg thee!"

But Sakura too was once an immortal, and she knows that the price of life can only be paid in kind. Wiping the remains of the tears on her cheeks, she stands up.

“Return my husband’s, and I shall sacrifice myself to the sea I was born from.” she says, determination ringing in her voice.

She glances at the lifeless form of her lover at her feet and she wants to bend down and kiss him but she knows that the taste of his lips would shatter her resolve, so with one final look, she takes a step towards the sea.

Placing on foot after the other she lets the familiar waters pull her in, and when the water is almost to her neck, she turns to see her husband beginning to stir at the shore.

Smiling sadly, she sends an apology his way, and lowers her head into the sea.

x

Ino baa-chan becomes quiet for a long time and I ponder the story as we sit in shared silence.

She breaks my train of thought when she speaks again, "Since that day, the tides became fierce, pounding onto the shore as though the water goddess’s spirit was trying to return to her lover."

She paused before continuing.

"The heavens were awed to witness a love so pure that in his last moments, the man only thought of his wife, and his beautiful lover who adored him enough to make the ultimate sacrifice. To honor their love, the rest of the gods allowed Naruto-kami to turn the spirit of the sea goddess into a sea breeze so she could return to the land and reunite with her lover for one fortnight each year.

And that's why, young Mira, for the entire year the sea aches to be with her beloved, but during the fourteen days in which they are united, the sea is calm."

I look out to the sea which is completely still under the sun, feel the light ocean breeze running through my hair while her words sink in. I smile-

"That's a really good story, Ino baa-chan. One of your best."

She breaks into a wide smile when she hears my words.

"Oh no, my child. It's not a story, it's very much real." she says, eyes twinkling with mischief.

I look away from the sea and turn my attention back to her as I laugh. "What do you mean it's real, baa-chan? It's only a legend." I say, waving my hand in disbelief.

"It most certainly is not." she bends closer to me and speaks into my ear, "Tell me Mira, what do you smell in the air?"

I'm a little surprised by her question but I humor her anyway and breathe in deeply. "Cherry Blossoms." I say.

As soon as the words leave my mouth, my eyes widen. There are no cherry blossoms in wave country.

My head reels as I recall the details of the story baa-chan told me, and suddenly realization strikes. Getting up so fast that my head spins, I look at the old man who lives on the cliff sitting on the rocks near the sea. And sure enough, I saw it-

Hidden in broad daylight, visible only to those who were looking for her, a woman with long pink hair pressed snugly into his side, her contented smile mirroring the one he wore on his lips.

Fin.

[millennial-star-gazer]

Fire And Gold: Chapter: 2

Fire and Gold

Nalu Lovefest 2019 Prompts: Magic, Memories, Reckless, Worship & Cravings (All Implied)

Genres: Romance, Humor, New Adult Fanfiction

Pairing: Nalu/Endlu (Natsu x Lucy & E.n.d. Natsu x Lucy)

Rating: T-M for language, steamy and mature adult sexual content (all consensual) in these and future chapters. Reader Direction is advised.(You've been warned!)

Summary: Let the day be known when fire tested gold in the most intimate sense. The forging of a mating bond between the dragon-demon hybrid and celestial maiden while further strengthening the relationship they already have. Natsu finally confesses his romantic feelings for Lucy at and asks to claim her as his mate and queen; though not without it taking a bit for it to fully sink in for the poor, baffled woman. The first chapter is one of my entries for Nalu Lovefest 2019 and part of my ongoing Nalu (The Demon-Dragon and His Celestial Princess) anthology series set not too long after the events of the original manga/anime.(Slight Au).

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Chapter 2: Piece by Piece

A/N: Hey guys, here's the long-awaited second chapter to Fire And Gold! Fun fact: The chapter title is inspired by the Eivor song of the same name which fits the overall mood of said chapter. Anyway, just wanted to give a major kudoos and shoutout to the amazing @bmarvels for acting as my beta which included edits and further development of this chapter! Now without further ado,back to the story!    Enjoy!

(Note: Scroll down past the cut/”read more “ button  for corresponding links and the actual chapter

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Disclaimer: I don't own Fairytail which instead belongs to the one and only Hiro-sensei instead!

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Read  Fire And Gold on other platforms along with  the rest of my writing here: 

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1. Fire And Gold

A. Tumblr

Previous (Click Here:) (or here:https://millennial-star-gazer.tumblr.com/post/188352111043/fire-and-gold-chapter-1-a-simple-spark-nalu)

    Chapter:2    Next (Chapter:) (Click Here:) (or here: https://millennial-star-gazer.tumblr.com/post/622423171640033280/fire-and-gold-chapter-3)

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Legend

Italics: Flashback/literary or song quotes (If Any of the most former )

Bold: First Person Thoughts

Bolded Italics: empathized word

Bolded Italics: outside of main story): A/N -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Piece by piece

You put me together

Till I am no longer

Broken"

"You see who I am

Deep down inside

I grow by the light of your gaze

You fill me with wonder

Fill me with hope

You have opened up my mind

I see everything in every little thing

When you're by my side"

( Eivør : Snippets of Piece By Piece)

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"Some of our friends are talking about us like we're not there ."

"Come on, Luce... don't worry about it." Natsu blithely waved off his partner's observation with a grin, clearly unfazed  by their guild mate's less-than-discreet side conversation. "You and me got way more important things to discuss. That kiss spell it out enough?"

"Yep — Message received loud and clear."

"Good—- though took ya' long enough weirdo." He teased, eyes twinkling with mirth. "Been subtly dropping hints for weeks ever since I decided try to make my feelings known. Didn't think it'd take you this long seeing how you're one of the smartest people I know. Just a bit slow on the uptake, I guess. Least' it helped knowing that you're just as crazy about me going off what I overheard from your 'girl talk' with Levy and the others. Otherwise, I woulda’ thought you weren't interested and given up trying."

"Oh... I see" Lucy noted a little more meekly than usual; heat-infused blood most likely rising in her cheeks. She couldn't help but be a tad self-conscious over unwittingly leaking the lurid details of what was honestly believed to be a discreet conversation.

My bad...

"So... uh... that's how you already knew— Oops. Ehh... That's kind of embarrassing.” Fingers were twirling a loose strand of hair in a physical display of mortification. " You really heard those, huh?"

"Yup!" The fire wizard popped the "p", flashing Lucy a smug-shit-eating-kind-of grin that set her heart a flutter. "Got hypersensitive hearing, remember? All those awesome things you were saying really fired me up, too. Anyway, you really should be more careful— never know who might be listening." He gave a wink with his usual teasing chuckle.

"That's for sure— guess I will have to more careful." Lucy's voice was a bit softer, mentally betraying herself for the other guildmates presence slipped her mind.

Man can it be a real challenge to keep anything a secret here at times...

"Definitely. It's all good though— you're still amazing, intelligent, loyal to a fault," Natsu's voice dropped lower with an extra pause between words. Not to mention the glimmer of intent in those onyx-green eyes.. The fire wizard's hand reached towards Lucy's face, calloused fingers tucking  a stray tendril of blonde hair behind her ear in a feather soft touch; before cupping the cheek of said mage who couldn't help but lean into his  palm . 

This is a completely new side  of him I've never seen before-more gentle and romantic.

"Not to mention you're sweet, caring, and an incredible wizard in your own right with plenty of spunk and a heart of gold. Definitely a great listener and super easy to talk with too — all in all an amazing and fun person to be around. Oh and did I mention how easy on the eyes you are?" 

"You.. really think so?" The celestial wizard inquired, voice sounding breathy to her own ears from being completely spellbound by her firey partner's words .

Natsu's not always much for words but he seems to be saying all the right things right now to keep me hooked. Basically putty in his hands here.

"Yeah! And I mean you seriously are the most gorgeous, sexy, and adorable girl I've ever laid eyes on. With that on top of everything else, what's not to love? You're everything I could want or need in a mate-slash-queen and more."

"Mate?" Lucy echoed in question, the last words really catching her attention. Interesting. The celestial mage's brain was buzzing swimming with piqued intrigue from the implications of Natsu what said; despite only being familiar with mates as a general concept.

I remember learning about how some animals mate for life in my lessons growing up—but don't think I've ever heard that term come up in conversation with Natsu before. Wonder what that could mean for us...

"You mean like a soul mate?"

"Exactly like that, yeah" came the dragon slayer's reply with a touch of pride; as if recalling centuries of ancient knowledge that were passed down— most likely through Ingeel. "The exact word you used is basically another term for mates that pretty sums what it means for dragon slayers. Ya probably learned growin' up bout' how some animals mate for life , right?"

"Yeah..."

"Okay, cool . So that whole thing isn't really that different for dragon slayers . Same goes for demons and hybrids—myself included- though those mates are also their queens. Oh and instead of just for life, they're soul-bonded for all eternity."

"Sounds pretty intimate." Lucy peered up at him through through the fringe of her thick lashes, the heat of his hand on her cheek still very much noticeable.

"It definitely is— believe me. Gods know how much I want you to be my girlfriend— but also far more than that at the same time. Dragons, demons, and hybrids have one person who they're drawn to- one person they're meant to be with. Not to mention the burning passion for their chosen that's unlike anything else— even by regular human standards."

"Wow..." There was so much she didn't realize, or maybe just didn't think more into about it, just how much a slayer's mate entailed. Yet, here Natsu was discussing the details to her as if it were one of their every -day conversations. Mavis knows she couldn't help the fluttering in her stomach with the way he was speaking about it all.

Normally, this would might overwhelming for some but not when it comes to the one guy I've been pining for so long. I mean it's all so exciting!"

"I know it's probably a lot to take in, but Lucy, you're literally that person for me. You're the one I've been always been inexplicably drawn to ever since we first met. The one who I see in my dreams when I fall asleep at night. The one who I'd go to hell and back for, who I'd do anything for to protect and keep safe. The one who I can't stand to be apart from for too long and whose face I wanna wake up to the rest of my life. Can't help but—" Natsu's thumbs were stroking along the curve of  Lucy's cheeks; so light, delicate, so tender, so gentle in touch that it sent electric sparks racing through her nerves . "I just can't help but want to claim you for myself and myself alone. "You're pretty much my other, better half, who I didn't even know I was searching for until I finally met you— and now I have. I don't always pour my heart out so publicly like this— ask anyone we know-but there's no one else out there for me. Never has been and never will be."

Holy hell did the celestial's heart melt delight from the sincerity resonating in each and every one of the dragon slayer's words.

Huh... Just when I think I couldn't fall any harder or be more attracted to the guy, he goes and says all this.

"It's no secret to anyone now that I've fallen for ya', Luce— hard. No going back now— you're all I see in the romantic sense. Not that others aren't important or that I care any less about them — but how I feel for you is different. Not inferior, just different. You've always been among those most precious to me... kind of like the brightest star of my universe that lights up my life in a way no else could. Damn, I sound pretty sentimental right now I don't care. Hell, said this more than once already—- but I swear I'm gonna love you with everything I've got in me. Not just today, but for all of this life and each and every one that comes after that—forever."

Holy crap does he have a way with words...

"Wow Natsu, that was something else…" Lucy was in awe, deeply touched by the stirring power of his heartfelt pledge.

"Thanks— means a lot to hear how impressed you are." "I'll say..."

"Yeah, we both know I'm more of a man of action— but my words are straight from the heart. Which leads to the question I wanna ask".

"Shoot." Lucy watched the fire eater with attentive eyes .

Wonder what else he wants to say.

"Kay, here goes. Will you let me claim you, Luce?" Nastu's voice was hopeful with just a tiny smidge of nerves . Probing, emerald eyes were meanwhile searching Lucy's face as if gauging her reaction. "Officially? As my mate and queen?"

This might be the most open I've ever seen him..

"Yes," came stellar mage's automatic reply without a shred of hesitation or second thought. Not to mention how the thrilling, romantic prospect of belonging to the fire demon for all eternity flooded her veins with a cozy warmth unlike any other.

Not only do we have an entire lifetime to spend together—but I also get to be bound to him in every conceivable way for all time? Awesome! Can this get any better?!

"I'd love to be yours, mate,queen, soul-bound—everything."

"Really? You accept?" He couldn't seem to help but double trying to contain the bubbling excitement threatening to burst from him.

"Of course— nothing would make me happier!"

"Score!"

Nastu's entire face lit up with an audible whoop just as Lucy let out a feminine squeal; from arms spinning her around after a lift .

" You... this... I can't .. holy crap this is so awesome!" The fire wizard dropped another ecstatic kiss on the moonstruck astral mage's waiting lips . "Did i mention how much I love you already, sweetheart? Well that's just too damn bad—won't ever grow tired of reminding ya for as the rest of our lives here in this world and after that! So glad that you're finally mine! I mean, I had a pretty good feeling you'd accept my claim... but hearing it directly is... Holy Crap! So stoked—like people have no idea!"

"Though I do " came Lucy's reply, a fond smile tugging at the corner of her lips. God, was being in Natsu's arms ever incredible—absolute perfection she couldn't help but revel in.

Don't think I'll ever get enough.

Not to mention, he didn't seem intent on releasing her from his embrace any time soon if the pure adoration shining  in his eyes was any indication to go by. Not that I'm complaining.

"And you're definitely right about me feeling the same." Lucy assured him, her hands resting on his warm, well-muscled chest.

"Course' I was, weirdo!"

"Aw, look how smitten those two are!" Levy fawned over the couple from the sidelines. "Beyond sweet!"

"Yeah, I'll say" Gajeel concurred , admiration colouring his tone. "Looks like one of Salamander's official term of endearments for Lucy already came naturally to him— like it often does with other dragons slayers, demons and their mates ."

"Oh my God yes— I heard that too! I absolutely love that Natsu called her sweetheart— just as sweet as the endearment terms you have for me. Plus, can I just say how amazing it is that these two are officially an item now? "

"Definitely— I'm happy for them too."

"I know, right?!"

"Aye- they make a great couple already! He loves herrrrr!" trilled Happy in a sing-song voice. "Isn't that right, Natsu?"

"You  better believe it, little buddy!"

Damn is he amazing ... The way Natsu was practically shouting his undying love for his mate to the rooftops with exultant abandon. No wonder adoration swelled in her heart!

"Hear that, everyone?!  I love Lucy Heartfilia with all my heart and soul!"

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A/N: There you have it peeps-Chapter 2! I really don't have much to say this time except to be sure to let me know what you think by leaving a comment/review, liking and reblogging! Please feel free to stay tuned for Chapter 3 and to check out the rest of my writing. (Corresponding Links are above, in the navigation bar and bio if reading this on tumblr. Please also see my FF and A03 profiles!) All right, that's all for now folks! Thanks to everyone for the incredible show of support so far! Until next time-take care!

[geminimoonbeamx]

Oh, Baby: Chapter One

A/N: Okay so I’ve literally had this in my drafts for the last...six months or so? And I figured I’d tweak it and edit and post it since I’ve been so AWOL on this site lately, and so that I can give you guys some new content from me.

Word Count: 3k+

Warnings: Heavy cursing. This chapter is pretty PG, talks of mental illness, unexpected pregnancy and contemplating abortion- but she doesnt go through with it. Smut to come. AND LOTS OF FLUFF TOO, I promise lol

Summary: After a drunken night, Y/N finds herself having to face the biggest decision of her life; is she ready for motherhood? And a better question, is Bucky Barnes, her long time friend and womanizer extraordinaire, ready for fatherhood? They’ll just have to go along for the ride and find out together. A Bucky Barnes x Plus Size Reader Story 

Chapter 1/6: The Baby Woe’s and Oh No’s

You knew it.

You’d known something was off, different, changed.

You sit on your toilet, your world spinning as you attempt to wrap your mind around what was going on. Everything seems sludge like, too slow and too fast and not real.

You’re definitely going into shock, you point out to yourself. The catatonic kind. You’ve been staring at the bright, sunny lemon print of the shower curtain, your eyes focused but not seeing. Your elbows rest on your knees and your hands cover the entirety of your lower face.

At least you’re not crying anymore. 

Nope, your body had moved past that-Maybe, it felt like the tears could start rolling again at anytime.

Oh god, what are you going to do?

Why, why, why?

Why you? You’d been a good person- well a decent person at least… You recycled and tipped more than twenty percent. Didnt vote for Trump and ate your vegetables.

And your life was just seeming to even out. You’d somehow landed your dream job a couple months back- every Wednesday night your voice could be heard on WNEX. You we’re making enough money to finally be comfortable- doing what you loved. Gaining a wide audience and wiggling your way into the industry. Your mind was so career oriented, so focused on your end goal that you’d never even considered something like this.

Throwing a big fat wrench in the gears.

One night, it had only been one stupid, drunken night. Hadn't you racked up enough karma coins to cover your ass for one fucking night?

Are you there god? It’s me, Y/N, and I really fucked up this time.

Wanda comes back into the tiled room a few minutes, her dark features soft and a colorful mug in her hand.

“Are you okay?” She gauges, gently, as she reaches out to you.

You snort and shrug, but accept the steaming cup from her anyway. You look down at the swirling, murky drink.

Wishing for just one moment that you could drown yourself in it.

“Look, babe, I know you’re dealing with some major shock right now- but maybe you should go lay down. We’ll figure it out later-” Wanda’s voice is even and you appreciate her being so calm and sure during all of this but you just can't process the situation enough to accept it.

You can't go lay down.

“Why not?” Wanda questions and you didn't realize you’d said that out loud, you hadn't even felt your mouth form the words.

Your head really is swimming. Disconnected from your body a little bit. You force yourself to take a drink of the tea as she gives you a more pointed look.

“Because I have to- I don't know. I have to figure all this out” You protest. You can't hear your voice, how spiked with anxiousness it is.

“There’s not much to figure out” Wanda supplies, unhelpfully as she leans against the counter, arms folded over her chest and you give her a look that’s half between a glare and a gape.

“Um, what the fuck do you mean? There’s so much to figure out, I don't even know where to start” You give a short, sharp, slightly hysterical laugh gripping the mug hard enough to hurt with one hand while cupping your forehead with the other.

“Okay, first things first. And this is the big one: do you want this?”

Well, that whole ‘I'm done crying’ thought you’d had before was a lie. You feel the tears well up once more and overflow, spill down your already swollen cheeks. Your face is hot. Your tummy is full of rocks.

You’d always hated crying. It never made you feel released or freed or lighter like it did for other people. It made you feel icky and stupid. And afterwards it always felt like you’d gotten punched in the nose.

Yes, you did have a therapist to work out those issues with, thanks.

Your mind doesn't know what to do with that question.

You look at Wanda, searching her face as though she might have the answers but she just shook her head and reached out her hand to rub your shoulder. That’s all she could offer. Her support in whatever path you we’re about to embark on.

And then you look down, at the countertop. That was usually littered with stray tubes of mascara or straightening irons. Bobby pins and half lit candles. All the things that resided in the bathrooms of girls in their mid twenties.

In place of those was now four pregnancy tests. All of which read positive.

The first two had been those double lined ones. Two bold lines- both times. Then you’d ran down to the bodega at the end of the block and gotten two more. And those we’re more straight to the point. They literally read the word pregnant- in a font that you don't think you’d ever forget.

Did you want this? Did you want a baby?

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

“I dont know- I’m not ready. The timing is all wrong” You croak.

“Okay” Wanda coo’s “well there's alternatives then-” you squeeze your eyes closed at that thought “Either way we should make a doctors appointment to make sure you’re actually pregnant. I’ve read so many stories about how unreliable these things are”

She holds up one of the tests and rambles on about all of the online articles she’d come across. How some woman had taken a dozen of ‘em, gotten all positive results and then went in and had an empty uterus.

“For one, ew. I peed on that” You nod your head at the test in her hand and she rolls her eyes.

“Other side of it- and I held your hair when you got food poisoning from that shrimp shack. I’ve come into contact with worse body fluids of yours”

“For two- I’m pregnant. I know it. I’ve known it for weeks. I knew something was wrong and I just tried to...think it away, you know? Out of sight, out of mind? I sound insane” saying the words out loud makes you realize how...ludicrous those thoughts had been. But still. It was the truth.

She just nods though “You don't”

There’s a moment of silence. Stretching, as you stew in your reality.

“I’d be doing it alone” you whisper into the mug as you sip on it “I really dont think he’d want a baby”

“You would never be alone, you know that. You have so many people in your life that would support you with this” Wanda protests, sad that you’d even say that.

“You know what I mean” You push on. Because having a good group of friends and family wouldn't change the fact that you were possibly looking at the possibility of being a single mother.

If you decided to keep it, that is.

“Yeah I do- and I don't know if I agree with that. Bucky's a lot of things, an arrogant asshole at that top of that list, but he’s a good guy and I think he’d want to be involved. He doesn't give off deadbeat dad vibes”

All of that was true. Bucky is a good guy, at the core of him.

He was kind and decent and the two of you had been friends for years upon years. He was charming, magnetic and women loved him- you’d found it amusing, before you we’re the one in his bed after a drunken night a month ago.

He’d left your messages mostly on seen since then. You’d only sent a few, but still that had stung. Him icing you out the moment he’d gotten into your pants pissed you off, not only because it was rude but because it was expected.

You knew how Bucky was with women, it had been such an idiot move to sleep with him.

It made it all the more complicated that you ran in the same social circles- had all the same friends. Sam’s small promotion dinner a couple weeks ago had been extremely awkward for you, to say the least.

He’d earned himself the cold shoulder from you and no matter how many times he’d try to broach a conversation with you, crack a joke in your direction, or single you out in a group conversation you pretended he didn't exist.

“Damn, re-jec-ted” It had been so obvious that Clint had of course pointed it out, which was uncomfortable but expected because Clint had no filter like that.

Bucky had stopped trying after that- and started flirting back with the waitress that had been throwing herself at him throughout the night. You cut out early, claiming tiredness. And upset stomach. Whatever to get you out of there.

To say it was a shitty night was a bit of an understatement and you hadn't spoken one word to him since.

“I haven't talked to him since that night- and now I’m what, supposed to call him up and tell him I’m carrying his child because he doesn't properly know how to operate a condom?

“I don't know, yeah? It doesn't mean you two need to get married, but if you choose to keep this baby, that’s going to be a conversation you’re going to have to have” Wanda is so annoying sometimes. She was such a sharp thinking human- always grounded and level headed. She claimed it was from always having to be the “good twin” growing up.

Of course she was rationalizing this whole thing while you we’re floundering about it like a fish.

“I think I should make a doctors appointment” You just mutter. You’d rather focus your attention there. It was easier, cleaner for you. A goal you could actually accomplish.

And so that’s what you did.

//////

They were able to get you in at the end of the week, which in overpopulated New York City was a godsend. And still, it felt like far too long. Like the reality of it couldn't sink in until you talked to a medical professional so you we’re left in some kind of fucked up long until then.

You tried to keep your anxious mind busy, throwing yourself into work. Talking to people over the static airways of the radio about their lives; about the world and all of its workings was so much easier than talking to anyone about what was going on with you.

The only person who knew was Wanda and you’d canceled all of your other plans during the week, not able to face anyone. Not yet.

Lots of sleepless nights, staring at the ceiling. Thinking until your brain physically hurt.

And then you’d turned to you journal- maybe if you wrote everything down it would make sense. If you could see it all, inked out, you could make a decision.

Did you want this child?

Wanda had suggested making a pro’s and con’s list and while it sounded crazy and unhelpful, and you rolled your eyes at it ‘As though that will help’, you ended up doing it anyways.

You start with Cons, naturally. Always had been too damn negative.

Cons:

-I have no fucking idea how to be a mom

-Bucky???

-My job. My career. Who’s going to watch the baby while I work?

-How in the fuck am I going to financially support a baby.

-No room in the apartment/My room is fucking tiny and where will we put a baby

(Wanda said we can turn half of the living room into a playroom/makeshift nursery. How fucked up though? Not even a real nursery)

-No car? A baby on the subway? No thank you.

-Weird to explain to people even if Bucky wants to co-parent. All our friends??

-PAIN

-Pregnancy looks so painful. Birth looks scary. My poor vagine.

-Life is basically over

-The baby will not have a grandmother from your side...

You could keep going on, but you decide to stop there. You could go on, make the list pages and pages long but you decide against it.

Pros:

-I’ve always wanted to be a mom. Always dreamed of babies and motherhood, baby fever crashes over me in waves.

-Me and Bucky’s baby is going to be cute AF(and that just pure facts)

-I have a great support system- amazing friends and family who I know will help

-Bucky could want to be involved. He probably will...maybe?

-He has a big family, i think. The baby would have lots of family

-I don't want to have an abortion. All about pro-choice, but I just...don't know if I can.

That had made you bite the end of your pen.

Adoption?

Could you give a child that you went through nine months of pregnancy up for adoption? Knowing yourself- probably not. You cant even get rid of the moth hole ridden clothes at the back of your closet. Not comparing a baby to a jean jacket- fuck, see how unequipped you were for this?

-I’d be a good mom(I think)

-I could swing it financially. Maybe get a second job

-At least I have a good insurance plan now

-My life might have more of a purpose?

You hide the lists away in one of your many journals. Stick it in the wicker basket under your night stand- and revisit it too many times in those days between.

You make a lot of other lists in that time, too. 

//////

One of them sits tucked in your purse as you make your way to the eighth floor- Arms folded across your chest and the inside of your bottom lip speared between your teeth as the elevator takes you up.

Wanda stands beside you, of course. Sipping on her iced americano. You’d tried to tell her that she didn't need to come, that you were perfectly okay with going on your own. You’d gotten about two words out before she shut you down-

“I already took the afternoon off, don't be ridiculous”

You both know you wouldn't admit it, stubborn as you we’re, but you’d let out a big sigh of relief. You really didn't want to do this alone.

The waiting room is standard for this building, looks similar to the one that you sit in when you see your GP- save for a sign hanging about the door that labels it the OB-GYN.

Fake plants and those standard waiting room chairs that had that weird diagonal print on them TV’s that we’re playing the local news and tables stacked with months dated magazines. There was no windows though and it made the back of your neck feel hot.

The receptionists is nice. Middle aged with mild with droning, mellow voice. She checks you in fast and efficiently and tells you that you’ve got about a 15 minute wait on your hands.

Annoying, you think even though you give her a big grin and a sweet ‘thank you’. You’d been right on time. Why in all offices of all kinds is there always a fucking wait?

Wanda has plopped down on a chair in the corner and is fingering through an issue of LIFE, her long legs crossed at the knee. you sit next to her. The office air conditioner is blasting, it had been a muggy May in the city, but you feel overheated. You let the chunky cardigan you’d donned slip down one shoulder, exposing your skin to the chilly air.

You should feel the cold but you’re over heated. Nervous as hell. Why doesnt anyone else in this office seem nervous?

You tend to people watch when you get overly anxious like you are now. Tend to take in every little detail of every little thing around you.

There’s a black couple- the woman doesn't look pregnant but they’re holding hands tightly and they keep whispering to each other. He smiles and nudges her shoulder with his. Then there’s a Latina woman who looks just about ready to pop and is reading one of the kids book to a little boy with her eyes. A white lady, with twin carriers rocks them gently as she chats with a woman who looked to be related to her, maybe. Older and graying.

You feel like a creep but you can't stop looking at them all. Staring at each of the people who are at different stages of the same  life-path you found yourself on.

Wanda clicks her tongue as her dark eyes focus on the magazine. Muttering, her accent thick, about how the lenses they used for the shoot on the page was all wrong.

Her photographers eye was snobby and elitist.

“Y/N?” The nurse calls you back, not butchering your name which is nice and look over at your best friend.

“Are you sure you don't want me to come back with you?” Wanda whispers, big gingerbread eyes searching yours and you shake your head quickly.

You had to do this, on your own. What if...what if you ended up having to do this whole thing alone? You had to be grown, had to face this solo. That’s just how you felt, even if it might not be true.

“It’s just another appointment- I can do it on my own. I’ll live” there's a reasoning lilt in your voice that she doesn't quite buy but she nods all the same. Tells you that she’ll be waiting right there for you as you muster up all your courage and train your face into a smile, following the nurse into the back offices, the door mechanically closing behind the two of you.

The OB’s office is...warmer then you’d thought it would be. Her desk has frames of all types and her walls are plastered with colorful posters, making the alabaster of the wallpaper less daunting. There was even a window in here.

You’re perched up on the exam table/ chair thingy, staring out at the tall buildings across the street, at the people moving fast below on the sidewalks. You wonder what all of them are doing? How many of the have kids?...

When there’s a soft knock at the door your attention snaps back to the present.

Doctor Helen Cho is a petite Asian woman. She has glossy dark hair that's tied up in a clip high on the  back of her head, and her voice is friendly and her expression open as introduces herself to you and reaches out to shake your hand.

“I’m Y/N, it’s nice to meet you, too” You sound so much surer and more confident then you feel. It had always been your party trick- meeting new people and being able to talk to them. Leaving trails of barley there acquaintances in your wake.

“So it says here that you think you’re pregnant, yes?” She gets right to it, and your appreciative for it.

“Yeah, I know I am.  I took four tests and they all came out positive and I...I feel really off” you try to explain it, poorly but she seems to understand.

“When you say off, do you mean like bad feeling off or?” She probes as she sits at her desk, swivels her chair to face you. Her chocolate almond eyes weren't piercing or clinical, just waiting.

“Not really bad? But I’ve just been so tired lately and I’ve had like, zero appetite. And my breasts have been so sensitive that it hurts to put on a bra” as you tell here these things you could slap your head for not assuming you were pregnant before you’d taken the tests.

Dr. Cho hums and nods as she looks over her tablet “Well from the look of these results from those blood and urine tests your nurse went ahead and gave you when you came in, I can tell you that you are definitely about nine weeks pregnant- so those symptoms are right on with where you are”

You inhale and exhale, bigly. It’s real. It’s been real, was a notion, a happening but now...it’s so freaking real.

And there's a real life changing decision to be made-

That you’d already made before you’d even walked into this office but now seemed even clearer. Crystal, in that moment of clarity.

“I want to keep it” Your confident as you say it. Your voice cracks with some kind of emotion you couldn't even begin to explain, but you’re confident. You’re sure.

Dr. Cho grins at you, and stands, congratulating you then, after she’s sure you even want a congratulations. You like her, think you might.

It’s hard to focus on her voice though because all your mind can think of is the next big obstacle, the next big step in all of this.

How were you going to tell Bucky?

Okay guys? I posted? Crazy right? lol give me some feedback! Comment and tell me what you thought of this. I absolutely love interacting with you guys, but I’m sure ya’ll know that. 

Also- the taglist for this story is still OPEN, so if you’d like to be tagged in future chapters just ask!

@peacefulwriter88 @jaamesbbarnes @jalapenobarnes @brieannakeogh @gifsbysimplysonia @lostinthoughtsandfeelings @lostinspace33 @4theluvofall @plumfondler @tatathekissypotato @siren-kitten-his @skishenanigans @geekyweed @spidey-babe-parker @lastfallenstar @rachelle-on-the-run @prettybubblesintheair @dani-si 

[apparentlynotreallyfinnish]

Think of Her

Here’s some un-edited, un-betaed college!rhink that just appeared on my Word document when I tried to write a completely different thing. Maybe you’ll like it.

---

Rhett is sitting on his bed and pouting when Link steps into their dorm room. He is buzzing with excited energy, babbling on and on about a particular class he likes and a professor he is obviously in love with. He bounces around the room, throwing his things here and there, discarding his t-shirt on the floor, going to his drawer, picking out a new shirt, pulling it on and apparently, deciding he’s made a grave error. His nose scrunches up and he sniffs his armpit. That t-shirt ends up on the floor as well but Link doesn’t bother to get another one. Instead he marches to their cupboard and takes out a box of cereal. All the while he’s gushing about the professor and the class. Rhett is irritated beyond belief.

“What have you been up to today?” Link asks as he sinks on the couch and pours himself a huge bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Rhett just crosses his arms across his chest and growls. Link’s gaze immediately snaps to him.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Rhett mutters and feels stupid as the word slips out. Obviously Link can see something is bothering him.  So, he continues: “Everything.”

“Tell me,” Link orders mouth full of Crunch. Rhett closes his eyes and tries to drone out the sounds that seem to penetrate his soul.

“Just…I don’t know. It’s all stupid stuff. Practice sucked today and I managed to fall on my face in the cafeteria. And I got a C on that paper. I worked so hard on it but apparently it was uninspired and redundant.”

“Aww, man, I’m sorry. Sounds like one of those days. Tomorrow will be better. Besides, everyone knows Professor Miller is a hard-ass. C from him is basically an A.”

Rhett huffs, annoyed, because he knows Link is right. But he had been so proud of what he’d written and certain he’d get at least a B.

“Also, Claire cancelled our date. She claimed she wanted to concentrate on her studies. And I mean fine, that’s okay. But then  I saw her kissing a guy on the courtyard so…she’s either studying dentistry now and was doing some intense homework or she was just lying to my face,” Rhett mumbles.

Honestly, the Claire thing stings way more than any of the other stuff. He’d gotten a bit ahead of himself with Claire, imagining all kinds of futures together after their first few dates. Seeing her with the guy had been like a gut punch.

“Shit, that sucks,” Link says sympathetically. He’s straightened his back and abandoned the rest of his cereal to slowly soften. He is looking at Rhett with an expression Rhett can’t read. His eyes are lit up - he almost looks excited - but he’s gnawing on his bottom lip and wiggling his leg anxiously.

“What?” Rhett asks with too much sharpness in his voice. He feels bad; it isn’t Link’s fault he’s having a bad day. But Link doesn’t seem to either mind or notice. He gets up and creeps to Rhett’s desk next to their bunk bed. Link’s eyes wander over the desk and he picks up a pencil, twirls it between his fingers a bit before putting it down and picking up a text book. Rhett frowns as he looks at Link twiddling with his things. Just as he is about to ask what Link is doing, Link mutters, without looking at Rhett.

“I could help you.”

“With what?” Rhett asks confused. The paper is already done and it isn’t like Link can help him with practice. Sometimes you just have bad days, it’s normal. And Link definitely can’t help with Claire. After watching her play tonsil tennis with a guy with a ponytail Rhett doesn’t even want her back anymore.

“I could help you feel better…help you relax,” Link whispers, still staring at the text book. A faint blush has crept on his cheeks. Rhett’s own cheeks immediately heat up and suddenly, he feels parched.

“You mean…?” Rhett asks with a hoarse voice.

“Yeah.”

Rhett feels a bit faint. A memory after memory resurfaces in his mind and he feels like hiding his crotch under a pillow. But that would be too obvious. He tries to appear nonchalant as he says:

“We decided not to do that anymore.”

“You decided. I… Anyway. What does it matter?”

“We shouldn’t.”

“Why?” Link presses on. He’s looking straight at Rhett now and Rhett feels like squirming under his intense gaze. God, have his eyes always been that piercing blue? They seem almost otherworldly.

“Because,” is all Rhett manages to answer. As his dick hardens, his resolve crumbles.

“Because why?”

“Because it’s gay,” Rhett says the word under his breath, barely audible. Link snorts.

“It’s not gay if we’re not gay,” he says, like it means something. Rhett frowns.

“That doesn’t make sense.”

“Neither does saying no to something you clearly want. And need.”

“I don’t need it!” Rhett says aghast. That’s a bit much.

It’s not like I know how long it has been since the last time. (Two months and four days.)

It’s not like I think about Link when I go to bed every night. (He touches himself after he is sure Link is asleep.)

It’s not like I actually want him in any way. (He still hasn’t touched Link and it’s slowly killing him.)

 “No?” Link asks putting the text book down and taking a step so that he’s right at the edge of Rhett’s bottom bunk.

“No,” Rhett replies with a shaky voice. He watches with wide eyes as Link sinks on his knees in front of the bed. The simmering heat inside Rhett’s stomach ignites into a blazing roar. His cock is straining against his boxer briefs, its outline clearly visible through the thin basketball shorts. Link’s hand settles on Rhett’s bare knee and starts to inch up. Rhett’s skin is buzzing with the sensation.

“I know this always makes you feel better. Helps you relax. Helps you sleep. Let me make it better, Rhett,” Link is coaxing him with a silky voice as his hand slips inside the loose pant leg of Rhett’s shorts.

We shouldn’t. (Link’s hand is so soft.)

We’re good Southern boys. (Link’s voice is soft too.)

Think of all the people we’d disappoint. (Link’s mouth is going to be even softer.)

 Rhett’s shorts have been pulled mid-thigh and his cock has been drawn out of his boxer. It’s leaking precum and twitching in Link’s hands. Link is licking the head as his eyes are flitting between Rhett’s cock and Rhett’s face. Rhett’s hands are on Link’s shoulders; he’s not sure if he’s about to push him away or pull him closer.

“Fuck,” Rhett mutters voice strained and gravelly. Link looks up at him again and says: “It’s okay. You don’t have to look. Just close your eyes and think of her.”

Rhett’s eyes flutter close as Link’s soft, wet heat envelops Rhett’s cock. He bucks into his best friend’s mouth and gasps for air. He can feel Link hollow his cheeks, he can feel the pressure build, and he can feel Link hum against his overexcited skin.

It’s too much this time. It’s been too long. The waiting has been torture and now he’s in heaven. Link moves around his cock slowly, methodically, pumping Rhett with his spit-slicked fist as his mouth is fast making a ruin out of Rhett’s mind and soul.

Rhett feels the tears on his cheeks before he even realizes he’s crying.

Link stops. The warm softness of him is replaced by the sharp chill of the room and Rhett whines.

“Don’t stop,” he whimpers, not daring to open his eyes. It’s like he’s afraid that all of this has been a dream again.

“Rhett,” Link whispers, voice weirdly wet and saturated; Rhett’s cock is a ghost on his lips making his lisp more pronounced. Shiver runs through Rhett and he opens his eyes. He pats his eyelids, tries to focus his swimming vision to see the boy between his legs.

“Why are you crying? Do you want me to stop?” Link asks. He sounds worried.

Rhett sniffs pathetically, embarrassed over the fact that all of a sudden his soul has been laid barer than his cock that’s still throbbing between his legs, uncaring of the emotional turmoil going on above it.

“C’mere,” Rhett beckons voice thick with emotion. Link’s eyes widen and he awkwardly climbs into Rhett’s lap, crushing Rhett’s dick between them and making Rhett moan and push against him.

“What’s wrong?” Link whispers. He looks at Rhett like he’s afraid he’ll break at any moment. Rhett thinks he might be onto something. He’s never felt this fragile before.

Rhett lifts his hands. They tremble as he cups Link’s face. Link responds without much prompting and closes the distance between them. Rhett tastes himself on Link’s lips. He doesn’t care. They fall onto the bed; shaky breaths and whispered words. Link is everywhere. He’s tugging Rhett closer. His hands are making Rhett bolder. His words are making Rhett stronger.

This can’t be wrong. (It feels like fate.)

It took me too long to let myself love him. (It was inevitable.)

They’ll learn to love us like this. (How could anyone hate something so pure?)

Link’s hands find Rhett’s impatient cock again.

“Don’t think of her,” Link pleads against Rhett’s neck.

“I won’t,” Rhett breaths.

“Think of me,” Link continues as his hands move with familiar pressure.

“Always have,” Rhett confesses with a whimper.

Link groans as Rhett’s hand palms the bulge in his jeans. They move away from each other, just enough to release Link from the confines of his pants. A wide smile spreads across Rhett’s face as his hands wrap around Link’s length.

“I’ve dreamt of this. Dreamt of touching you. Dreamt of making you cum. Dreamt of making you mine,” Rhett whispers making Link whine and thrust his hips against Rhett’s eager hands.

“Tell me your mine,” Link orders voice rough and breathless.

“Yours. Only yours!” Rhett cries out and finds Link’s lips again with his own. They breathe into each other’s mouths, barely kissing but needing to be as close as they can.

Rhett comes first, calling out Link’s name in the peak of his passion. It still echoes off the walls as Link follows him over the edge.

Their breaths slow down. Their hands still. Their eyes open.

They look at each other and smile.

[meitonapalace]

Water

A/N:

Trigger warning: child death.

So I’ve wanted to write this for a while… Years ago when I was making the character of Taka I decided he had a younger sister who drowned in the palace lake when she was a child. I never did anything with that story until a year or so ago when I listened to Sinead O’Connor’s version of Scarlet Ribbons and for some reason it reminded me of the sister and a poem I read at school (can’t remember what it was called now) and I thought of this scene?? Anyway I was out in the rain the other day and I finally decided to write it. Whilst editing I checked my facts and it turns out Thoit was actually still in the Hive when Temit drowned, so this scene didn’t actually happen, but… oh well. I like the concept of it anyway.

xxx

The tropical rains beat down from the sky, like bullets upon Thoit’s skin. Through the leaves, the branches, making a racket as they came. It didn’t bother him; he would rather be out in the heat and the wet of his forest than in the palace, faced with the coldness of his marriahe. He came out here to hide from her; that was certainly a factor. A small one, though. He just liked being out here. With Notion, preferably… but Nomizon was in his class. An Outsider needed a strict education just as much as a Hiveakan, and Thoit was not ignorant of that. It gave him time to himself, anyway… time alone with his animals, his world, his thoughts. … Thoughts that he didn’t care for, more often than not. It was easier when Nomizon was around.

He stubbed his cigarette out on his arm, briefly enjoying the euphoria that came from it. Euphoria that lasted through him jumping into the lake. Lasted while he allowed himself to sink down, the sound of the raindrops thundering around him as they replenished the water lost from heat. It was like being inside a storm. Like he were being fired at. If he didn’t move, if he didn’t swim, he could pretend he had been shot, and he could sink down and die… and that was when the euphoria stopped. When he thought of that, and recalled a water death he wished had not been. Decades ago, in Meitona, in Meitona Palace…

“Temit!” Prince Thoit had called her name as he ran, as if it would save her. As if his voice could ever be stronger than her own limbs, or make them work any harder than they already were. She knew how to swim. She wouldn’t have been allowed out on her own if she didn’t know how to swim. But ripples in the water, the absence of her… Thoit had just known. She could have been anywhere in the palace, but he had known. “Temit!” Into the palace lake he’d thrown himself. Down he’d swum, underneath the ripples he’d seen. Through the water plants that brushed against his skin – plants that were low, and too weak to capture him. A child, though… a little Outsider girl, who was only an average swimmer, and panicking and scared, and moving without thinking, and forgetting to hold her breath in her fear…

Thoit started to move. Fast. He hurled himself at the surface, through the water thundering around him, into the safe, wet air and he took a breath. A deep breath, that healed him. He threw himself onto the grass and he lay there, so unsettlingly aware of how easily he had been able to save himself. … And the irony of that.

It hadn’t taken him long to find her. It hadn’t taken him long to free her from her chains. In seconds he was on the grass with her, trying desperately to push the water from her lungs. Screaming at servants who had come to help, to send for the palace doctors and tell his father. His father… not the girl’s mother. Thoit hadn’t wanted her to know it yet. He hadn’t wanted her to know at all… not until there was something good to tell her. He knew it would break her. His father, it would not. He would be angry, and he would briefly feel saddened… but he would handle it. This wasn’t the worst news that Thoit could give to him.

“Is she breathing?”

“She isn’t responding!”

“… Sire.”

‘Stop.’ ‘I’m sorry.’ ‘You did your best.’ Words Thoit had heard, from those who really had admired him. Those who had been grateful to him for noticing she needed help, even if he had noticed too late. … Where was the admiration in that? He could have left her there and it would have made no difference to the world. No difference to her mother. In fact, perhaps the woman could have lived in hope, that her child had been kidnapped and would one day be found. People often said not knowing was the worst. It was better to know, than spend an eternity wondering…. Thoit didn’t agree with that. If it was his boy, his Nomi… he would rather live in hope. Blind, ignorant, stupid hope that his pup would be returned. He was certain he would rather see Nomizon’s absence than Nomizon’s corpse. But… people had been grateful to him either way. For bringing her to the surface, and carrying her to her parents. His father, her mother, Keika Fala… and his own biological mother as well. He had knelt down before them, with his sister in his arms. Fala had shivered, and gasped. Speechless, stunned. Not knowing what to do. What to say, what to feel. His own mother, Denna… she had screamed.

“No!” Keika Denna had wailed, in a way that no Hiveakan should, and especially not over an Outsider – and especially not over an Outsider who wasn’t their own blood. But… she was blood, as far as Denna was concerned. As far as most Hiveakans would be concerned. Family through marriage was still family, and Denna had lost her daughter as much as any blood could say. The anger upon her face… Thoit wasn’t sure if she would kill him. Had he not been holding Temit, she might have. But she didn’t dare harm the girl. So she had grabbed Fala, and looked her in the eyes… and that was when Fala had started to cry. Down the women had fallen, holding onto each other. Fala sobbing against Denna’s frame, Denna seething as if she wanted to murder whoever was responsible. It would have been easier if someone was. If only it had been a murder. If only Temit had been killed, by someone Denna could capture, and gut, and torture… that would have been closure enough for her. She would have got over it, the way her husband had. … But she didn’t. She never got over it, because the only language she spoke was revenge, and there was no revenge to be had… and with that, Denna didn’t know what to do. She had never known what to do. Not with Temit, not with her husband… she just lashed out, at anyone who dared comfort her. Anyone who dared try to make her compose herself. She was never one for composing herself, or keeping her emotions in chains. She was dangerous, and violent, and free. … And how hard it had been, being her son. Still… at least she had always been honest. Crazy as she was. sometimes, Thoit still thought he could feel the pain of the many times she had struck him. Or shot him, or burned him in one of her episodes of madness. He could still feel it now, in his lungs, from where she had punched him. It had felt different though, back then. Not as sharp, and not as even across both sides. … … Shit. It wasn’t a fucking memory!

[a-collection-of-villainous-aus]

Coffee Au pt 2

PART 3 OF THREE

It was the end of the day, Acylius and Demencia wanted to do nothing more than just sink into one of the comfy seats and doze off but work still had to be done.

 As Flug was cleaning away mugs and other items he could still taste Black Hat on his tongue, lingering in its flavor the apple of Eden, he wanted to bite again, savor him anew but the demon was not exactly famous for being sweet so no doubt the next would be bitter…right?

 “Boy what a day, am I right or am I right tree man!”

 Acylius was silent as he looked over at Black Hat’s empty seat, he’d seen him leave, some work emergency no doubt, money had been left on the table but he’d found himself disappointed that the demon wasn’t still there demanding to be served after hours, crazy as the day had been it had actually been surprisingly fun to have him around.

 “It is strange... “

 “What that he digs you and not me? “

 Demencia teased gently nudging him.

 “Please be serious for one moment, you will not believe this, but I do feel as if I know him from some other life...there were things today that felt... so familiar.”

 Exasperation filling his voice as he walked off to pick up a latte glass that was half full, grumbling they should not order the large if they were not going to drink it all.

 “Oh, like what?”

 “Well, when we kissed after you suggested he could help...”

 Touching his lips as he looked over at the kitchen, whispering

 “It did not feel like the first time.”

 “Pffft seems I was right he wanted to lip lock and suck your soul right out of your-”

 “Demencia, that is enough!” Flug dropped the glass he was holding, it shattered across the floor spilling its cold contents, liquid started seeping through the floorboards, oh dear she realised perhaps she’d pushed a little too far as his eyes lit up and she was dragged forward Darth Vader style only without the throttling . His hand engulfed in cerulean flame, claws extended forward and with a flick she was off her feet hovering, snarling “I am trying to run a coffee shop, not a brothel while we are friends  I do not need you interfering with my love life.”

 In all her years she’d known Acylius, the lizard girl had never seen such a fire as this burning within him, damn Black Hat must have more of an effect than he was willing to admit, rolling her eyes she responded “You think you could put me down, also you old fart what love life, you’re like fifty and have boned like what …once and that was with someone who was for hire to play as Black Hat, I mean I’ve offered cause who doesn’t wanna climb that tree and sit on your branch, but you were as flustered as a sinner in church.”

(Remember demon so not like human 50 XD )

 “Woman…argh!” Acylius tried to keep a straight face, but honestly he could never stay mad at her, a chuckle left him as the demon shook his head and set her down

“You are hopeless.” “Yeah, yeah I know I’m a lost cause, but why is it so hard for you to believe he likes you?” She returned while straightening out her uniform. “Please, I do not think he would find a suitable partner in a barista who tortures people for information on the black market… holy…” Acylius went quiet and blinked looking at Demencia “Is that why the Black market is called that! My alternative profile is in that world...I need a drink ...am I working for him and not…know what no this is too much too soon, I am going downstairs, I am going to drink and torture that man until he is a bloody pile.” Demencia gave him a deadpanned expression in response “One: it is not for you to decide who he wants to bone and two: you seriously only just figured that out, you’re smart but sometimes really dumb.”

 Acylius sighed and just walked off hearing her call out after him saying “And what about this!” It was easy to imagine her gesturing towards the spilt coffee “You clean it up, ASSBUTT!” Demencia huffed; she should never have let him watch Supernatural, mocking his sentence in a whiny voice before getting to work and only smiling as she swore she could hear the muffled voice of him saying “I heard that!” Pffft of course he had, demon senses and all, it was no surprise and yes it probably wasn’t wise to try and interfere with her friends love life, especially when it left her to clean up duty instead of getting to play just how long  can we make our victim scream.

 Picking up the pieces of broken glass she paused looking out the window, wondering up on that high hill where Hat Manor sat, what the old demon was doing now, heh maybe he was even day dreaming of Acylius, that’d be pretty adorable.

 Hat manor stood silhouetted, painted on a sea of blue and purple, diamonds scattered over its surface, there was no moon tonight, though this is not what we are here to do though, while the night sky held its beauty the home held its secrets deep under the foundations. Down winding stair cases of stone, walls lined with torches that came alight as Black Hat passed them with bright emerald flames leading to a room, large extravagant, doors locked with spells reacting to his presence, opening out to show the pristine display with a red carpet. Glass cases that remained in a constant polished state appeared liquid with candle light reflecting off their surfaces, to many people these items would be considered odd in the sense they to anyone else held absolutely no value…but to Black Hat they were treasures and when each one was touched he could remember a small moment attached to each and every one of these things… Recalling how his Acylius had taught him to use a barbers blade for shaving, he himself did not grow stubble or the such unless he wanted to and he had suspected the same of his Doctor, who liked to do human things as simple as that.

It was not that he’d allowed Black Hat to shave his face that had made the memory but that he’d trusted him so close to his throat with a blade, it may not have killed him even if he’d wanted it to slit it.

Though that was the thing with anyone else he would have hacked them to pieces and laughed, in that moment he’d slowly brushed the razors edge along his flesh, intently focused on the task at hand, leaving him mesmerized at just how intimate a simple act could be and how it felt to be trusted by him.

The demon had not been down here in some time, that did not mean what was here had lost any meaning, no on the contrary  at times being here caused so much pain he could hardly bare it.

 Walking slowly through this world of past wonders, there were mannequins in neat rows wearing suits, everyday clothing to swim wear and pyjamas, some clothing items pressed into picture frames, stopping in front of one case in particular a small quirked at the corner of his lips, on a cushion sat an old tattered Bear, blue after some chemical accident when Acylius had been a child or so the doctor had told him. This was kept for more than one reason, one Acylius had loved it dearly and two even as a grown demon he’d found him sometimes napping with the damn thing tucked under his arm, apparently you could never be too old to enjoy a favored gift from the past, claws making soft tapping sounds on the glass.

“What an odd name for a child’s toy…Five o Five…then again there is that silly old bear named Winnie the Pooh…”

 He said to himself in passing thought.

Just being here already felt as if a hand had reached in around the void that passed for his heart and was slowly crushing it, glancing over at the beautiful cello he and Flug had played together, the intimacy of creating music on the same instrument so passionately had near rivaled their passion within the sheets…before you wonder yes Black Hat even had their four poster royal Georgian bed perfectly made as the doctor would have wanted it.

 Lab equipment that museums would beg to have, first edition books that could very well be the only remaining copies of the texts within some of them…yes he’d saved practically everything, did it perhaps make him obsessed…incapable of letting go, you might think so and yes it probably was the case.

He himself could not forget the way the barista had kissed him, it was a perfect match to the way his Acylius performed such affectionate acts, the same passion a memory so real and tactile rising to the surface and layering perfectly to match the movements of want. Thinking back on this afternoon as he’d sat there sipping his hot chocolate, listening at times to the inane conversation of others and hearing the name of the Café he’d failed to read the name of upon entry in favor of warmth than the cold weather. He stared at one dark oak closet a mannequin stood in there locked away, blood stained clothes, the salt of tears within the collar, even a beast could weep when its heart was broken, shoulders tensing just at the minor scent of iron and acid he adverted his gaze. Could that Barista really be Acylius Flug reborn, the man who’d lay dying in his arms , promising him he’d find him amongst the stars…rambling about artists who place their soul upon the canvas, full of hope and pain, madness full of splendid wonder and final words being of love until  there were none. Kisses upon lips that no longer held their warmth as a mournful cry left him whimpering like a child lost in the wilderness of the vast world.

 Acylius’s body no more than a limp doll that had lost its light and as with all demonic forms he turned to smoke and ash washed away with a tender breeze littered with embers while all he could do was watch.

 Even though he had barely understood what his lovers last message had been, for years he’d sought out painters who favoured the night skies, though none matched the pure emotion of which Flug had spoken until one Starry Night in France just outside the Ravoux Inn he came across such an artist. A rough looking creature really with a missing ear, in fact he’d nearly passed him until this man had grabbed his arm and Black Hat had at first thought him mad until he spoke of a spirit tall and pale, scars and ears not human and eyes so blue no matter the blend of colours he’d tried to use the ever changing hue had been impossible to match.

 Up the stairs of that humble place the artist called home he entered, moonlight pouring through an open window, curtains swaying ever so delicately behind the easel sat a canvas not long since painted on, just as promised in thick oil paints of swirling night time wonders, blacks, blues bright shining yellows in a myriad of hues there stood Acylius eyes closed within the heavens.

 “I have dreamt about this man yet I do not know what sins I have committed to bring devils and spirits at my door!” Black Hat given him a look before replying “Even Angels it would seem have mercy on a fallen devil.” He’d without second thought left a fortune upon the old bed in the artists room and taken what was rightfully his, news of his death had been reported not but a few days afterwards which even in the demons opinion was a great tragedy.

 Now on the wall here it hung still years later, framed in gold with a bench for him to rest upon, other pieces at either side by Flugs hand were portraits and sketches of Black Hat…but this one in the center had been a gift from the beyond , a promise that he was coming back.

That barista had to be him, had to be his Flug; the café was named after a painting no one but he and the painter knew about. Could it be, he’d finally truly found him amongst the stars.

(this is a poor version of the Artists work I was inspired by, especially if you figure out who I was talking about...but as my own work I like it XD)

[gudisolangi]

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When I meet a writer with a wonderful book idea, one who's definitely the best person to create that book, right away I'll typically encourage him or her to self-publish. This is because I understand that, if an author is completely spent in what they have to claim, as well as if they're figured out to develop a buzz concerning their message, they'll discover ...

5 Fantastic Advantages of Self-publishing

1. Control. When you participate in a contract with a major posting house, you're authorizing an unique contract that stops your having input into a lot of the crucial decisions that will certainly influence your publication's assumption by the public, as well as its sales. You'll have very little state concerning the look and feel of your publication cover, the recommendations that show up on the back of your publication, or the phrasing of your press release, as an example. And also given that all of the above components are essential to giving your publication its finest possibility for bestseller status, such loss of control can position considerable issues. "But don't authors recognize better than I what to do to sell a publication?" you may ask. Not necessarily. Authors generally know more about their book's subject-- and also thus, about their target audience (market)-- than anyone else. Hey, they wrote the book!More food for considered signing with a major publishing residence: If for some reason your publication doesn't offer rapidly and also the author lets it go out of print, there's usually a "waiting duration "before the author is enabled to self-publish the publication to get it back on the racks. In the meanwhile, the reading public sees that your book is "no longer published" as well as a good deal of word-of-mouth damages is done. Self-publishing means that you are at the helm of your book project. Obviously, it likewise indicates that the duty for its success rests in your hands. Yet when you count on your message as well as recognize that you're mosting likely to do whatever in your power to get that message out to your target market, isn't it a fellow feeling to recognize that you're the one driving its success in the marketplace?I recommend a balance

of control and also delegation. The best posting ally can train you through the process of composing as well as editing your publication, and will certainly likewise suggest you to create and also market your message in a method that obtains optimum outcomes. Your publishing ally might be a book editor, a posting expert, a published writer, or all 3. If she deserves her salt, though, she'll recognize what it will certainly require to obtain your book released, and also she'll know just how to assist you make it occur.2. Money. Why does it make good business sense to self-publish? Consider the following: a contract with the publication author doesn't provide you an uncompromising guarantee that your book will ever before and upon the racks. If you're a brand-new author, your author will allot zero advertising bucks to advertise your publication. It's sink or swim! If your book does market well, it will be due to your very own tough job and also resourcefulness-- and also your benefit will be a little portion of the publication's overall profits. Self-publishing admittedly involves more resources danger, however it additionally implies that the comprehensive maneuvering you do to market your book will certainly most likely to creating income for the individual who the majority of deserves it. After all, you're the one that's doing all the work to spark referral concerning your book. Not just that, you created it! Do not you deserve to reap 100 %of the profit? 3. No Waiting, No Being rejected. The Cinderella story of the little book that obtains uncovered by an author as well as becomes an overnight bestseller is primarily simply that-- a fairytale. Yes, it takes place. Yet it hasn't been occurring a lot recently. In the existing publishing climate, with significant residences paying enormous advances to star authors-- their"golden goose "-- very little is delegated invest on developing brand-new ability. Let's be truthful: an author isn't mosting likely to invest a dollar marketing a book by a yet unknown author. To get your publication thought about for publication in the first location, you'll require to have an extremely persuading advertising technique in location which you intend to apply on your very own, at your very own cost! Such as the instance in every style from children's books to different wellness to historical books. First-time authors are being averted en masse. And given that lots of nonfiction publication jobs are time-sensitive-- well-placed offerings meant to respond to a details market trend-- their authors frequently while means their valuable home window of possibility awaiting agents or publishers to respond to a proposal. It isn't impossible to get a major posting residence curious about a book by a new author, but it's obtaining harder constantly. Self-publishing eliminates the delay(as well as the going along with weight from your shoulders)and the pain of rejection from the procedure of getting your book right into print.4. Independence. Self-published authors are usually people with self-confidence in their message. Several have currently created a complying with by offering talks as well as workshops in areas where they live and also work. Professionals understand when they have an effective individual message-- they don't need a publisher's approval to pump themselves up. Such writers, most of whom are already seasoned experts, self-publish their publications due to the fact that they like remaining in the driver's seat of their book project. Rather than gamble that a huge company will treat their publication with the regard it should have, such a writer takes the posting reins to guarantee that her message reaches the best feasible target market. Nobody cares much more about your book than you do.5. Power of Idea. The power of belief in our words is what makes promises good and turns dreams into fact. Authors who self-publish their books believe deeply that will certainly take advantage of reading what they have to claim.  They have unwavering conviction. Such authors commonly tell me," I needed to write this book. I just have to get it out there!"Deep belief is the selfless power that drives all true solution and makes a distinction in the globe. Authors with a strong feeling of purpose recognize that they can make their books prosper. They do not want to linger for a publishing residence to "accept"their work. Mindful that time is precious, such authors develop their very own posting opportunities. They obtain behind their very own message. They launch a campaign fueled with idea in the creative power of intention.Every excellent editor or publishing professional knows that the most effective means to make your publication a true success is to create as well as market a message that you will certainly both be honored of for many years ahead. Producing uplifting publications is an enthusiasm. Make it yours, and every one of your books sold will certainly be a ballot of confidence in on your own and the remainder of humankind!

[skullsandfairylights]

Writer’s Month 2019

Day 6: Word Prompt: kids 

Mark loved his son. Tim was his world. Especially after all the hassle he had gone through during the adoption process; there was the question of stability around Mark’s main source of income coming from his YouTube channel and as well as how he would deal with travelling when con-time came around due to him being a single parent. But in the end, the case went through and Mark found himself with the adorable little Timothy. Tim was only four years old when he came to live with Mark and, in the two years that they had been a family, both Tim and Mark had settled into a comfortable routine.

           Each morning, Mark would wake up early and go for a run or walk with Chica before he prepped for breakfast. Mark would then wake Tim who would pad through to the kitchen, clamber up onto his seat to eat and watch cartoons on the kitchen TV as he ate his breakfast. Mark would then drop his son off at school with money for his lunch in his pocket and his little rucksack on his back before he drove home to record some videos for the day.

           On the days when recording would take longer than planned, Mark relied on one of his friends to pick Tim up. Most of Mark’s friends didn’t mind picking up the now six-year-old as Tim had a way of charming everyone he met, especially his pseudo-aunts and uncles, who all adored the little boy.

           Then when all videos had been edited and uploaded to the channel, the little family would get together and eat dinner before spending quality time together; watching a movie or playing games until it was time for bed.

           Mark would then tuck Tim in and whisper a “Sleep tight, Little Biscuit.” followed by a kiss to Tim’s hairline before Mark left the room switching off the lights as he went.

           Life was good for the Fischbach’s.

 ~💕~

 “So, did you have a good time today?” Mark asked as he entered the dining room carrying two plates of chicken with mash potatoes and mixed vegetables. He placed one plate, with a slightly smaller portion pre-cut into mouthful-size pieces, in front of his son before he settled down in his seat opposite.

           “Yeah, Daddy! It was really cool! We went to the park! But it wasn’t Kyle’s mom or dad who took us, it was his big brother, Jason! He pushed us on the swings and he spun us on the roundabout! And we went super super super fast! It was awesome! Then we played hide and seek in the trees and bushes around the park! And I won because Jason helped me climb a tree and Kyle couldn’t find me for ages!” Mark smiled as he listened to his son’s tale. He expected there might be a small bit of exaggeration concerning how long it took Kyle to find the other boy but so long as he was happy.

           “Remember to eat your dinner before it gets cold.” The adult in the room pointed out when Tim took a pause for breath.

           “Yes, Daddy!” Tim exclaimed, suddenly gathering a large amount of chicken and potato onto his fork and trying to shove it all into his mouth.

           “Not so much, Tim. Just what you can chew. You can talk after.” Tim nodded his head and began to take smaller, more appropriate bites of food. After managing to eat a few mouthfuls, Tim made a show of swallowing before taking a deep breath to start talking again.

           “Then, Jason took us to McDonald’s and I got a chicken nugget Happy Meal! And then! And then! Then we went for ice cream at Scooby Doo’s!” Mark smiled at his son, knowing that ‘Scooby Doo’s’ was Tim’s way of saying ‘Scoopy Doo’, a little cafe and ice cream shop in town that sold homemade ice cream in a wide variety of flavours from the normal and expected to those unique to the cafe.

           “That sounds like fun,” The adult remarked as Tim shovelled another forkful of food into his mouth. “Did you get your favourite?”

           “Yup! I gots a large cone and a flake!” Mark knew all about the flake, when he had picked Tim up, the boy had flecks of chocolate smeared into his t-shirt along with the large ice cream drip stains. “Then we went back to Kyle’s house and we played in his garden all afternoon! We played pirates and guarded our treasures from the evil shark that wanted to steal it! It was so much fun! We pretended that the treehouse in Kyle’s garden was our ship and Rodger was the shark!” Rodger being the other family’s pet dog; a small, excitable beagle. “And then Jason came outside and played with us in the treehouse! He was Davey Jones! And he tried sink our ship by controlling the shark! But then! We fed the shark Davey Jones’ hand like Captain Hook in Peter Pan! And we won!”

           “Well, it sounds like you had a very exciting day.” Mark smiled fondly at his son as the boy scraped the last bites of food into his mouth. Tim then carefully put his fork and knife together in the centre of his plate, copying his father’s actions. “So, I guess that means that it’s an early night for a certain little boy?”

           The look on Tim’s face evolved from a big smile to a look of horror and he suddenly yelled in protest, “But it’s movie night! We always stay up and watch movies on deh weekends!”  

           “But surely you’re too tired from your long day of being a pirate?”

           “No!”

           “Alright, well how about we go and run you a bath, then once you’re in your PJs, we can put a movie in?” Tim quickly nodded and scurried from his chair as Mark stood up and carried both his plate and Tim’s plate over to the sink, to wash up as Tim took his bath.

           The running footsteps alerted Mark to Tim’s presence and when he turned around, he found his son donned in his bathrobe, hugging a clear plastic box to his chest. Mark led the way through to the bathroom, where he filled up the tub with warm water and helped Tim to get settled. He then gave Tim his bath crayons and dropped a couple of toys into the water before he said, “I’ll just be in the kitchen, so just shout if you need anything.” Tim nodded his head though he seemed to be already engrossed in creating his first piece of artwork on the tiled wall.

           For the next fifteen minutes, Mark washed up the dishes and wiped the countertops before he retreated to Tim’s bedroom to set out the boy’s pyjamas. Once Mark had completed the few tasks he needed to, he rejoined his son in the bathroom.

           Tim had been busy during the time Mark had been away. The white tiles on the walls now held a collage of colourful pictures. One was, Mark assumed, supposed to be Tim and Kyle on a pirate ship, with a strange beagle-shark hybrid cresting the spiky waves, jagged teeth gnashing. Another image, Mark guessed, was supposed to be Tim’s family; Tim in the centre with Mark next to him, and then gradually scattered all around was Mark’s close friends who had all begun to fulfill large roles in the young boy’s life. Then the other images seemed to be a collection of rainbow animals, though if you asked Mark to identify them, he certainly would have struggled to give any definite names or labels.

           “Hey, Squishy, ready to wash your hair?” Tim turned his attention away from his latest drawing, something that used a lot of green, and nodded to his dad, dropping the crayon into the plastic box. Mark reached out for the children’s shampoo and set about washing his son’s hair for him. “Ready to get out now, or do you want to play some more?” Mark asked once Tim had finished rinsing the product from his hair.

           “Play more!” Tim exclaimed, enthusiastically, suddenly thrusting a shark toy into his dad’s hands, “You’re the shark, Daddy!”

           Mark laughed, glad he was already wearing short sleeves as he plunged his hands into the water to make the shark swim. “Okay, ten more minutes then we’ll get you ready for bed before we watch a movie.” Tim nodded and grabbed the boat toy, talking as though he were the pirates aboard the boat.

 By the time the Fischbach’s were ready to settle down and put on a movie, it was almost eight thirty. Tim had been changed into his Spiderman-themed pyjamas, had brushed his teeth and was hugging his favourite teddy bear; handmade with black button eyes and a little pink moustache, dressed in a little red-and-white striped jacket. Mark had similarly changed into his pyjama pants and a comfy t-shirt and was happily curled up under a blanket with his son under one arm and Chica under the other. The movie played in the quiet of the living room, the only other sound being the rhythmic thudding of Chica’s tail as it wagged happily against the fabric of the sofa.

           It wasn’t even half an hour into the film when Tim was out cold, snoring lightly. Mark sat in place for a while, ensuring that the boy was fully asleep before he carefully untangled himself from the blanket and lifted Tim into his arms. Chica padded behind the man, happy to follow along behind as Mark made his way to Tim’s bedroom. Carefully, he balanced the small boy against his chest with one arm as he pulled back the duvet to tuck Tim in.

           Tim stirred for a moment but showed no sign of waking. Mark smiled and bent down to kiss Tim’s forehead, whispering a good night into the boy’s hair. He turned back towards the door to see Chica staring at him, head tilted to one side. She sat at the end of the bed and lightly pet at the floor with her front paws.

           “Come on, Chica, out. Maybe when he’s older.” Mark whispered, gently urging the dog out the door. “Okay, bed, Chica.” Chica seemed reluctant but eventually she padded out the door, followed by Mark after he had switched on the night light on the chest of drawers.

           Mark then walked with Chica to the sliding door leading out to the patio and back garden and let the dog outside. He flicked on the outside lights and left Chica to her business as he set to work cleaning the bathroom.

           Half an hour later found Mark locking all the doors and checking the windows. Chica was back inside and likely to be upstairs in Mark’s bedroom, curled up on the dog pillow. On his way to his bedroom, he peeked his head into Tim’s room to check on his son and smiled as he saw the small lump shuffle. Mark smiled softly, pulling the door mostly shut but leaving it slightly ajar.

           Mark brushed his teeth and did his night time routine in the en suite of the Master bedroom. Chica raised her head to look at him as he made his way over to the bed. The dog bed was positioned at the end of the double bed, pressed up right against the side. Mark pet the dog’s head lovingly as he passed, leaning down to press a quick kiss to the dog’s nose. “’Night pupper.”

           Climbing under the covers, Mark got himself comfortable before running through tomorrow’s plan. Tim was back at school. He’d gotten his homework done on the Saturday – Tim had sat with Mark as he edited some videos in the home office, working through the sheet of symmetrical shapes and looking for real-world examples - and his backpack was all ready to go by the front door. Mark had already planned out which videos he would be recording and which games he would play, he usually aimed to try and get two or three filmed, even if they weren’t all edited straight away.

           It didn’t take Mark long to fall asleep, listening to the slow huffs from Chica.