#mine is janus and patton to an extent

[robertdownerjunior]

who's the character you say you hate because you don't like their personality/actions but actually hate bc they remind me too much about you or your life?

[sml8180]

Party

Day 31 for @huffletrax YuleTube prompt list! I had a lot of fun writing these stories, honestly. A few of them even let me expand the Chaos is Normal universe a little bit, which was really fun.

This story does include some mildly suggestive content (roughly to the extent that “Dark” had, so it isn’t anything major, but I thought it would be a good idea to give a heads-up).

Party

Roman was excited for the New Year’s Eve party he and Remus had pulled together. They had finished decorating the smaller ballroom in the central castle in the Imagination. It had been determined that this would happen even before Janus had revealed his name, but it was even bigger now that his joining the main group was being celebrated, as well.

Roman straightened out his ascot and secured it with the tie pin that featured his logo. He knew Remus would be in a similar outfit tonight; they’d planned that out, after all. The Prince pulled on his vest and buttoned it up, before sitting on the bench at the end of his bed and pulling on his tall boots, lacing them up and tying them. He tucked the ends of the laces into the boots, and stood once more, adjusting his hair in the mirror before straightening up, smiling a bit to himself. His boots were black, as he usually wore. His pants were white, and fit close to his frame. Roman had on a red dress shirt, with a white ascot, and over that he had a white vest with gold roses embroidered in. Over everything, he pulled on a red tailcoat. He rarely wore this suit, finding it far too formal for most events, and especially before Remus was accepted, he hated wearing it, as it made him stand out a bit much even for his own liking. But, Remus would be in a similar suit, which comforted him.

Roman came into the ballroom to find the castle staff setting out different food and drink options, and Remus setting up a few smaller things off to the side. Remus was in a similar outfit to Roman, though his clothes were black where Roman’s were white, green where Roman’s were red, and instead of gold roses, Remus’ vest had silver thorns embroidered in. Remus’ mustache was trimmed and neat, and his hair, though fluffy, was actually combed, and the white streak was freshly touched up, going by just how brightly it stood out from the rest of his hair.

“Looking good, Re,” Roman praised with a smile. It wasn’t often Remus would clean up like this, so it was quite a sight.

“Right back at ya, Romano,” Remus smiled. “Matthew keeps trying to get me to put on my damn crown.”

“I almost forgot about the crowns,” Roman mused. “Would you wear it if I wore mine?”

“They’re still dumb.”

“We’ll look dumb together, then.”

“Fine.”

Almost immediately, a pair of castle staff approached the pair, one carrying a gold crown with red jewels set into it, and the other carrying a silver crown with green jewels set into it. The crowns were set on each twins’ head, and the two staff bowed and took off to assist with final preparations. It didn’t take long for things to be completely ready, just in time for the other residents of the Mindscape to enter.

Logan was first, unsurprisingly. They were dressed in a fairly simple suit, with black shoes, dark blue slacks and matching jacket, black shirt, and a two-toned blue tie consisting of a dark blue base color, and lighter blue circuit-board patterning. Their hair was combed back neatly away from their face, and they actually looked a bit intimidating.

Entering next was Janus. He was in a set of black shoes and black slacks, a yellow dress shirt, black bowtie, and a black suit jacket with an intricate snake embroidered into the left side with metallic gold thread. As usual, he had his yellow gloves, bowler hat, and capelet on, as well. As always, he looked put together.

Patton and Emile entered together. Patton wore the grey suit he’d worn in the courtroom before Lee and Mary-Lee’s wedding, though his jacket had hearts and swirls embroidered into it in light blue, and he had a small frog pin on his lapel. Meanwhile, Emile wore a tan two-piece suit, white shirt, and a light blue tie with a light pink paisley pattern on it. It was a new tie Patton had just given him for Christmas, and Emile seemed to love it.

Virgil came in next, dressed in black skinny jeans, black heeled boots, a purple dress shirt, black tie with shimmery purple spiderwebs patterned on it, and a black vest with his usual purple and black patches and white stitches. His eyeshadow was more glittery than usual, and had a purple tint to it, and he was wearing proper eyeliner, as well.

Remy and Dice came in last, entering together. Remy had on his dark sunglasses, like he always did, along with a set of black shoes, black skinny jeans, a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, a tie the color of coffee with a bit of cream added with a pattern of white Zzz’s all over it, and matching suspenders. Dice, meanwhile, was wearing black shoes, black slacks, a dark grey turtleneck, a dark plum suit jacket, and a scarf made to look like a strip of film. To say they both looked good would be an understatement.

With everyone now in the ballroom, the party was able to properly begin. Everyone seemed to be having a good time, chatting, eating, drinking, and getting up to various sorts of shenanigans. Remus pulled Logan aside to dance, Remy was seemingly playing a game with himself to see just how bright he could get Patton and Emile to blush -which at some point the other two seemed to join in on and retaliate, trying to make Remy blush as bright as they could get him to-, Janus was chatting with Dice about various movies, and Virgil and Roman were joking and chatting.

By the time midnight was approaching, just about everyone had shed at least one layer of their clothes. Remus and Roman had both ditched their tailcoats, many of the others had shed their jackets, Dice had also taken off his scarf, Janus had taken off his capelet, hat, and jacket, and untied his bowtie, Remy’s suspenders were no longer on his shoulders, but rather hanging from where they were secured to his pants, Virgil was walking around without his shoes on, and even Logan had taken off their jacket and loosened their tie.

Patton, Emile, and Remy were growing fairly handsy with one another, and Remus and Janus were in a similar state. Virgil half-joked that it wouldn’t be surprising if people had various bruises in the morning. Roman had simply swept him into another dance in response.

Time practically flew until they were approaching the final countdown to the new year. Roman attempted to get everyone’s attention, though over the noise his words were lost, until Remus got up on a table, cupped his hands around his mouth, and shouted.

“Hey, horny bastards, listen up!” Remus called out over the group, catching everyone’s attention and directing their eyes to him as he cackled.

“To be fair, you’re a horny bastard, yourself,” Logan stated, pushing their glasses up the bridge of their nose.

“Yeah, but that’s my natural state of being,” Remus shrugged.

“Put a pin in that, for now,” Roman stated. “I just wanna say, before we ring in the new year, that this year was quite a ride. We’ve helped Thomas, helped each other. Hell, there’s no more Dark Side to the Mindscape! We’re all together, now. Thomas met a cute guy, we accepted Remus,” he paused and looked at his twin, smiling a bit as Remus looked back up at him with a smile of his own. “Logan came out of the closet, and we finally learned Janus’ name. Sure, Thomas skipped out on a massive call-back, and went to a wedding where he felt like he was just another face in the crowd, and, he burnt himself out… But, we’ve all learned from all that. This coming year will be better, I know it,” he finished, as the others murmured their agreements.

Soon, the group had all pulled themselves together enough to head out onto the balcony and join the final countdown to the new year. Roman had Virgil held close, an arm around his shoulders. Remy had Patton and Emile held close to him, and Remus held Janus and Logan around the shoulders. Dice was leaning against the wall near everybody else, seemingly unbothered by the fact he wasn’t being held close by someone else.

Finally, the countdown began.

“Ten… Nine… Eight… Seven… Six… Five… Four… Three… Two… One… Happy New Year!”

The Sides all joined in, cheering as fireworks began to go off overhead. There were kisses exchanged, laughter, and just a wave of joy coming over everyone. It was enough excitement to turn Virgil’s eyeshadow a bright, glittery purple as Roman pulled him into a kiss.

It was another hour or two until everyone finally started to head to their own rooms. Roman and Remus simply snapped away the mess left behind, before leaving with their partners to go back into the main Mindscape. It had been quite the party to welcome the new year, and everyone was hoping that things would look up in the coming year. In the morning, they would all be talking about the previous night, once they started to recover from the late night and drinks. For now, though, everyone was off to likely either fool around, or simply rest, crashing half-dressed on their beds. 

[brandstifter-sys]

Corpse Groom

Word Count: 1712                     (Ao3)

Characters: Janus, Patton, Roman, Remus, Virgil

Relationships: Dukexiety

Rating: T

Warnings: mild body horror, death mention, decay, zombies, crying, innuendo

--------

Janus was a reasonable side. He put up with a fair amount of nonsense and contributed to Thomas' well-being. All he asked for were a chance to make his case and that no one touch his hat.

"I swear to you, Patton, there will be hell to pay if he doesn't have it!" Janus practically snarled at the side on his left, "I don't care how much you want to protect him. I have one rule!"

"Don't speak to Patton that way!" Roman cut in, glaring at Janus. He was not happy about parading around with the snake, but he was not about to let Patton go alone.

Janus stopped outside Virgil's door and hissed at him. Without his hat, he looked far more feral and far less patient.

"Now Roman, it's okay. Jan is upset, really upset, and I know he doesn't mean it. What would you do if someone took your sword? This is important to him," Patton chided and did the honor of knocking on the door. Roman bristled and crossed his arms.

"What!?" Virgil groaned tiredly from the other side of the door.

"Hey kiddo, it's just me. I was wondering if you knew where Janus' hat was!"

"On his head?" Virgil grumbled, "I don't have it. I wouldn't want it! Ask Remus or something!"

Any response died in Patton's throat the second he laid eyes on Janus. The poor thing was teary eyed and clawing at his hair.

"Thanks anyway, Virge!" Pat responded and scooped Janus into his arms. He ignored Roman's disapproving glare and made his way to the common area. Janus clung to his shirt and sobbed.

"It's okay, Yellow Jay. We'll find it," Patton said soothingly and sat on the couch. Janus shook his head and buried his face in Patton's shoulder, not caring that Roman came in and could see him like this.

"Logan doesn't have it! It's not lost in your room! Remus said he doesn't have it! Virgil and Roman don't want to sully their hands with anything of mine! It's gone!"

”What do you mean 'sully?'"

"They hate me and want nothing to do with me! I tried to be helpful and it backfired! I don't care about that now, I just want my hat back!" he wailed and trembled in Patton's arms. Patton shot a pointed look at Roman, who looked uncomfortable.

Roman sat down on the other side of the sectional and twiddled his thumbs. He had to keep Patton safe from this slippery serpent but he really didn't want to sit and watch his nemesis cry. He would take discomfort over uncertainty.

Die, die, we all pass away

Remus' voice floated through the room, like a distant echo laced with radio static. Janus paused and dried his eyes as the chilling words encircled him. He had no idea what Remus was up to.

But don't wear a frown, 'cause it's really okay!

Patton and Roman shared an unsettled look.

You might try and hide and you might try and pray! But we all end up the remains of the day!

Remus faded out like a whisper on the wind, leaving an iciness in his wake. The three sat in silence, anticipating the worst. But nothing happened.

"What is he doing?" Roman asked and rolled his neck.

"I have every idea," Janus huffed, his voice still wet from his breakdown.

"Well whatever it is, it looks like he—"

Die, die, we all pass away! But don't wear a frown 'cause it's really okay!

"I sit corrected," Patton winced. Janus hugged him and ruffled his hair. Patton would need cuddles after this.

You might try and hide and you might try and pray! But we all end up the remains of the day!

Remus' voice traveled like a fog over the three, always the same lyrics, changing in volume as if he were dancing about the room. It put Patton and Roman on edge. Janus was trying to compose himself rather than pay attention to Remus' antics. He was trying to get attention from someone else.

It was after the fifth time Remus graced them with his eerie song that Virgil trudged into the common area, still waking up. He was going to question the trio shifting uncomfortably in their seats but then Remus started singing again.

Virgil sighed and walked in front of the couch, scanning the ceiling for something.

"I take it he's bothering you," Virgil said, turning his back to them as he scanned overhead. He paused for a moment and sighed, crossing his arms. Remus was going to pay for this.

In an instant, Virgil's usual hoodie and jeans combo was gone. Instead, he was in a gorgeous, albeit old and faded, strapless wedding dress that showed off his back and shoulders. Or it would have, if not for the long veil that dropped past his hips. It was certainly enough to make Roman gawk.

Until he turned around, still examining the ceiling and shifting to get in position.

"Zombie!" Patton shrieked and clung to Janus. Virgil paid him no mind. His left arm was all bone and his skin was blue. Part of his left cheek was rotted away to reveal his teeth, there was enough decay on his right side to show some rib, and from his ankle to his thigh, his right leg was all bone, with just enough flesh on his foot to wear a pair of heels that he really didn't need. The slit in his skirt revealed that much to the confused sides.

Adjusting the flowery veil and righting his neck, Virgil took a deep breath and said,

"Hopscotch."

He held out his arms as a skeleton fell from the ceiling with a yell. He was bare, save for a familiar mustache and an even more familiar derby hat. Patton nearly fainted.

"Hey! Give me a listen you corpses of cheer! At least those of you who still got an ear!" Remus sang and went limp in Virgil's arms. He was fighting back a smile.

"I'll tell you a story that'll make a skeleton cry!" He ran a bony finger down his cheek, drawing attention to his only eye. Janus knew where to aim first.

"Of our own jubiliciously lovely corpse bride!" Remus sang, spreading his arms to show off Virgil. When there was no response he sat up and licked Virgil's cheek, and for good measure, grabbed his butt.

Virgil dropped him and held up his hands. Remus landed with a yelp. Janus got up and snatched his hat. He sank out with a huff.

"What the hell was that!?" Roman snapped. Remus shrugged.

"An idea! And it was a good idea! Just look at this hot emo snack!" Remus giggled and tried to get a peek up Virgil's skirt. He had to know the extent of the decay!

Virgil pushed him away with his foot, with some force, before bending over and picking him up again. It was safer for everyone that way.

"Before you say anything about me in a dress, you might want to take Pat to his room. He looks like he's gonna be sick," Virgil said pointedly. He made it a point not to show this much skin—and bone–around anyone but Remus. He stopped trying to keep the duke from seeing since he showed up at the worst times.

Roman nodded solemnly and picked Patton up like a princess. He sank out with the father figure and left the undead to their business.

"Are you ever going to ask me to watch a movie like a normal person?" Virgil scoffed and averted his gaze, "And you can ask to cosplay rather than this."

"Nope! It's so much more fun to see how you react to my set-up!" Remus jeered, "I was hoping for you to say your vows so I could pop up in the dress and smooch you! But this works too!"

"If that happened I would definitely try to get away from you and get hitched to some boring girl—named Virginia. I'm not about to do that."

"Is it 'cause you're gay or because I'm that irresistible?" Remus teased and wiggled his eyebrows.

"I'm very gay but I don't do skeletons," Virgil scoffed playfully. Remus giggled and snapped his fingers, or whatever someone without flesh does. In an instant Virgil's rot and blue skin were gone and Remus was naked in his arms.

"You forgot something," Virgil jeered.

"No I didn't!" Remus argued, "I have skin, and plenty of it if you wanna take a bite! And you, well your pecs look good in this dress. And your arms and legs. You're really hot. I would be your ball and chain, you can attach some balls and chains to my—"

"I have my own ideas for you," Virgil mused and set Remus on his feet. Virgil snapped his fingers and willed his second favorite onesie on, unzipped just for Remus. He got Remus in his grinch onesie too and set up the tv to watch Corpse Bride.

"It starts with a movie, then some trashy rom com to give us the chance to make out, and then we'll figure something out."

"Kinky!" Remus giggled and clapped his hands, "You know me too well, Scare Bear!"

"I like to know about my secret idiot boyfriend," Virgil teased and licked his cheek, "Maybe I'll tell the others soon so Princey doesn't get any ideas. I'd hate to see you murder him over me."

"What about—?"

"About anything else isn't good, but I don't know if I would completely hate it," Virgil joked and dragged Remus to the couch, pulling him against his side.

"Have I mentioned that I love you?"

"No, but I love you, so I beat you to it today," Virgil said and played the movie. Remus snickered and kissed his cheek.

"I can do better!"

"I'd like to see you try."

"With this hand I will lift your sorrows," Remus hummed and grabbed Virgil's hand, interlacing their fingers, "Your cup will never empty for I will be your wine—"

"Shut up," Virgil huffed, though his eyeshadow was turning purple.

"Okay!" Remus giggled and snuggled closer. He had better ideas to make Virgil his corpse groom—without making him an actual corpse!

[anxious-logic]

The Power of Family: Prologue

Masterpost

Chapter Warnings: blood mention (not a lot), food mention, (what could be interpreted as) very brief self-harm, mention of chronic illness in and future death of an off-screen parent

Word Count: 1,882

---

Virgil narrowed his eyes as he felt something tug at his core, gentle but insistent.

"Yes?" he murmured to himself, closing his eyes as he traced the pull back to its source. His eyebrows lifted in surprise as he saw where the call was coming from.

Virgil didn’t know mortal years very well, but a boy who couldn’t have been more than sixteen was kneeling at a temple in a small town. The temple wasn't much - four columns of wood, capped with a woven roof barely holding itself together, acting as a safehouse for all six of the gods. The boy was in front of the single altar, which was made of a large, flat rock, his heels tucked underneath him. Virgil heard the boy’s words echo in his mind as he began to speak.

"Remus, God of Life; Roman, God of Stories; Patton, God of Trust; Virgil, God of Strength; Janus, God of Truth; Logan, God of Wisdom.” The boy exhaled shakily as he placed a small wooden bowl filled with berries and fruit on the altar, bowing his head. "I ask for your aid in this time. I... My mother is sick. Dying. She cannot live much longer with our doctors and medicine." The boy sat back, closing his eyes. He swallowed, and firmly nodded once as though he had decided something. "I offer anything you ask in return for her life.”

He reached into a pocket in his cloak, withdrawing a knife. Virgil tensed as the boy drew it across his palm, letting blood well up over his skin and drip onto the altar next to the bowl.

"Please, spare her."

The boy wiped the knife on the ground next to him, cleaning the blade. He pressed his palm to the rock of the altar, staying there for a moment before standing, a smear of red remaining on the stone.

Virgil's eyes snapped open as the soft pull dissipated. He broke into a dead run.

~~~

Virgil rubbed at his forehead in frustration as he stared down at the stone at his feet, his eyes tracing the carved rune corresponding to his abilities.

“What are we doing about this situation?” Virgil asked. He was trying his best not to reveal just how panicked he was; the unsettling feeling that always permeated the air of the ritual clearing was making the attempt far more difficult.

A teenager – barely more than a child – was offering his life to them. All of them. In return for his mother’s continued life.

“We don’t have much of a choice, do we?” Patton’s voice was wavering, the god of trust barely able to keep tears from spilling down their face. They were sitting curled up just behind their own runed stone.

Roman, the god of stories, gritted his teeth. “There should be an exception. Isn’t there?” They turned to Logan, the god of wisdom. “There must be. For young mortals? Who don’t know what they’re offering?”

Logan spread her hands, her face sorrowful. “He knows full well what he is offering. He understands what it meant when he spilled his blood on the altar.”

Patton’s knuckles were white where he was gripping the god of truth’s hand. “He had such… trust in all of us. That we could do it.”

“He spoke the truth when he said he was willing to give anything.” Janus’s voice was quiet, but it cut through the silence regardless.

Remus jumped up, pacing frantically back and forth. “There has to be something.” He raked his hands through his hair, his face contorted in concentration. “I can- I can create something. An exception. Right?”

“Not without the belief, knowledge, and trust to back it up,” Virgil said. “And you three can’t spread it that quickly. Regardless of what we could do otherwise.” He looked apologetically at where the tears had begun spilling over Patton’s cheeks, the god silently sobbing.

“We can’t take his entire life force,” Logan said forcefully, her face unusually emotive. “We need to figure out another solution.”

Virgil closed his eyes, trying to trace back what he knew about this child. “His mother fell ill when he was only a child,” he offered weakly. “He was forced to grow up much too quickly, beginning to do daily hard work to support his family even before his voice dropped.” He opened his eyes. “Can we do anything with that?”

Logan’s eyes suddenly held a glimmer of hope. “Pull it forward more, to today,” she said eagerly. Virgil frowned in confusion, but closed his eyes to do so. “What do you see?”

Virgil bit the inside of his cheek as he very carefully located Thomas again, nudging at his past ever so slightly to get today’s records. He gasped as he came upon something extremely unusual.

“There are extreme abnormalities,” Virgil whispered. “At approximately the time he contacted us. Is his plea to us the reason why?”

He heard a rustling, then Logan spoke. “Describe the abnormalities.”

Virgil probed at the area, wincing slightly as it seemed to resist his attempts at further exploration. He crouched down and placed his hand on the carved stone at his feet, the magical conduit boosting his abilities just enough to assess Thomas’s strength in more detail. “...It’s all over the place - strong, then weak, then practically nonexistent, and back again. It’s resisting all of my attempts to look into it more.”

He opened his eyes to see Logan pacing back and forth excitedly.

“And after?”

Virgil frowned. “It’s- different,” he said haltingly. “I don’t know how to explain it. It’s familiar, for some reason, but certainly different than it was before he contacted the six of us.”

Logan turned to face him. “Trace me.”

Virgil reared back, startled at the sudden change of subject. “I- what?”

“Trace. Me.” Logan stepped closer, her presence intimidating despite how small she was compared to Virgil.

Virgil shook his head slowly, then looked into Logan’s eyes, diving into her mind. He felt the familiar resistance, then the usual sparks that came from the other gods’ inhuman powers.

“That’s enough,” Logan said, blinking her eyes and pulling out of the trace. Virgil shook his head slightly to reorient himself. “Now, how similar was Thomas’s mind to mine?”

Virgil’s eyes widened. Oh. “He’s not human,” he breathed.

Logan tilted her head from side to side. “Not completely,” she corrected, before her face split into a grin. “Don’t you see? We can- do more things with him, his life, now that he’s no longer entirely mortal.”

“We don’t have to take his entire life.” Janus’s eyes were filled with hope.

“Precisely.” Logan quickly walked over to Janus, grabbing the other god’s hands and squeezing them tightly, bringing them to her chest. “We should be able to- split his life force, for lack of a better word. Wherever we like. And likely manipulate it slightly, so we won’t be bound to a year for a year.”

Remus pulled his gaze up from where he was looking at the ground. “Yes. We can.” His voice was filled with hope.

“What could we manipulate it to? That it’s a life worth living?”

Remus’ eyes began to glow a bright green, and he was silent for a few moments. He blinked, his eyes going back to normal, and squeezed his hands on his thighs before speaking. “We could take twelve of Thomas’ years and make it twenty-four of his mother’s. She would live to sixty years; that is far closer to the typical mortal lifespan, is it not?”

Logan nodded. “Longer, even.”

“So- twelve years of Thomas’ life would make him quite young, would it not?” Patton seemed excited at the idea.

“He would be four years old,” Remus said, nodding. “Very young.”

“He could not live in his village,” Roman murmured. “Especially as we do not know the extent of his- otherness after sacrificing himself to us.”

Virgil took a deep breath in an attempt to center himself. “No,” he whispered.

“He would lose both memories and appearance after the transfer,” Remus added. “For all intents and purposes, he would not have lived a day past four years.”

Patton snapped their head up suddenly. “Can we-” They cut themself off as all of the others looked at them, pressing their lips together.

“Can we what, love?” Janus asked, thumb rubbing over Patton’s knuckles soothingly.

“I know we have not… done it before. But could we- could we take him in?”

Roman inhaled sharply, the only noise heard in the silence that fell after Patton’s words.

“I know it… it’s not something that any of us – or at least I – have considered at length.” Patton swallowed, looking around at the other gods. “But… well. I will not pretend that I would not… appreciate the chance to raise a child, mortal-born or otherwise.”

Janus was looking at Patton with a facial expression that Virgil had no hope of deciphering. Logan looked considering, and Remus was looking at his partner like they were the center of his universe. When Virgil looked over to Roman, squeezing his hand where it was still on his partner’s thigh, he didn’t see any immediate negativity towards the idea.

“I would love that,” Remus breathed, breaking the silence that had fallen over the clearing.

“Would he be- um.” Virgil licked his lips, carefully measuring his breathing as everyone looked at him. “Would he be just… yours?” He gestured to Patton, Remus, and Janus. “Or would he be… all of ours? Together? I mean, I just. Um.” He shrunk back a bit. “Yeah.”

Patton exchanged a glance with Remus, then looked over to Janus, the three of them seeming to have a nonverbal conversation for a few moments.

“I don’t think we would be able to do it on our own,” Janus eventually said. “And it would be incredibly difficult for any of us to raise a child without them seeing all six of us as parental figures, considering how entwined all of our existences are.”

Virgil nodded his head, conceding the point to Janus. “I suppose,” he said in agreement.

Logan exhaled, standing up straight and bringing her hands to clasp behind her back. “So we are in agreement, then? We intend to… adopt… this mortal child and raise him as our own?”

Nobody disagreed.

“Well,” Logan said. “Let us go, then.”

She held out her hand to Janus, who took it and extended a hand to Patton in turn. They offered their hand to Remus, and the rest of them joined until Roman closed the circle by clasping Logan’s other hand.

Patton looked around the circle, making eye contact with all of the other gods. “Last chance to back out,” they offered quietly. Nobody spoke up.

“Okay,” they said, closing their eyes and taking a deep breath. They all stepped onto the stones inset into the ground in front of them, the runes carved into the rocks beginning to pulse with power. As the gods began to whisper under their breath, they glowed brighter and brighter until it was no longer possible to see them.

After what might have been seconds and what might have been years, the light faded. The clearing was empty, except for a small child sleeping peacefully in the circle of carved stones.

Next chapter

[littlebigafterdark]

patton's asthma attack and finally agreeing to try therapy

content warnings: hurt/comfort, detailed description of asthma attack, very brief mention of past eating disorder, crying (i always hav that tho)

i copy pasted this from mine and livs discord convo so thats why it might be formatted weird and i swear a lot also if you see "hhh yeah" then thats liv commenting hshshsh

patton has had a cough the past few days because BASICALY since priscilla (remys cat) visited hes been more breathless with his asthma but he didnt tell anyone bc he doesnt want to worry them or make it so vee never get to see priscilla again if she cant visit anymore

so his asthma is acting up but he ignores it - and hes had asthma cough for a couple days (which is a sign of an incoming asthma attack) but again hes ignoring it, hes so used to brushing off symptoms he doesnt click what it means and he diesn ttake his inhaler when he needs it

WAAAHH oh fuck oh my god oh god wait fuck i just realised

the moment patton gets his asthma attack its saturday afternoon, roman is little and playing with logan and vee isnt quite little yet but fae's on faer way there, fae is very giggly and playful and patton says "okay babygirl, lets go get you changed!"

and when he gets up from the couch he takes a moment to cough and just stand still a sec bc he got suddenly dizzy but he pushed through it to not worry vee, and he actually usually lifts her onto his hip straight away, but this time he very subtly is like "okay hold daddys hand while we walk to the stairs"

so they get to the stairs and patton of course lifts vee up, and theyre only a few steps up when pattons breathing gets really heavy. it makes vee frown and look at him and say "daddy am i heavy?"

and patton smiles and shakes his head, because hes too breathless to speak. but he pushes through and hurries up as fast as possible

once theyre at the top of the stairs, patton is wheezing. his chest is rattling and whistling and he suddenly loses his smile and quickly hurries away from the stairs to place vee gently on the hallway floor, and as soon as vee is safe patton wobbily sinks to his knees and leans his head against the wall. his eyes shut tight trying so so hard to breath but its realy whistly now

and vee of course panics. "dady? papa are you okay??" and whimpers when patton doesnt react and clutches at his chest

and it throws her out of her semi regression. she jumps up and hurries downstairs, a little wobbily but ultimately fine. and she speints to where logan and riman are and yells "daddys h havin a panic attack!" and instantly starts crying

logan and roman were in the middle of a game and smiling and laughing but as SOON as they hear that they jump into action. logan runs out of the room to go to patton and roman grows up and runs to vee and lifts her up to shush her cries and calm her down - they dont even share a single look before they do this, they both just instinctively know what to do

and logan of course finds patton and realises its an asthma attack not a panic attack - he goes into his emergency like emotionless mode where he just gets the job done. he asks clearly where patton keeps his inhaler and patton just shakes his head. so logan alarmed asks "you dont have a reliever inhaler??" and patton winces and shakes his head again.

logan sprints to his room into his bedside drawer to find tthe inhaler he keeps for emergencies double checking it hasnt expired

he sits with his legs around patton, patton leaned back agains his torso, and puffs pattons inhaler for him and times the attack and the puffs (knowing that if it isnt better after ten puffs and fifteen minutes they have to call an ambulance) and using his own deep breaths against pats back to help him recalibrate his breathing

luckily it only lasts 8 and a half minutes and 8 puffs - but logan is so so shaken about the fact that that was very close to requiring medical assistance, he had his ohone out ready to dial 911

once pattons attack is over he's finally breathing, short and deep at first gasping in the oxygen, but within a few more minutes of sitting against logan it slows down and is much calmer. hes very shaky because the reliever inhaler does that to you, and weak from the tax on his body, so logan helps him up into their nearest bedroom (pattons)

at first he calls roman to swap places with him and watch over patton hust so logan can change vee into a diaper since she regressed from fear as soon as roman picked her up and obv he cant change her diaper

so roman sits with patton while logan does that and roman is actually really quiet and awkward and nervous, just looking wide eyed at patton and hugging himself.

and patton feels bad abt that and whispers "its okay little prince, daddys not hurt. im sorry for scaring you, honey" and roman just chews his lip and nods and looks down and they dont talk again until logan is back and roman goes out to take care of vee and logan comes in to lie with patton and rub his chest soothingly

logan is distressed and frustrated and shaken at that point but he knows not to have their conversation until the next day bc patton will be emotionally and physically exhausted

but the next day they have a serious talk - logans pretty ANGRY that patton was so ignorant of his wellbeing that he didnt refill his inhaler, patton brushes it off but logan says its a good thing he secretly kept one for patton (bc he almost suspected this might happen)

it rly hits patton when logan tells him if he had needed anymore puffs than he took they wouldve had to phone an ambulance - like patton not wanting to worry his family by admitting his asthma was acting up backfired way more and has made them worry even more because he had a full attack that could have gone so much worse

the whole conversation is VERY stern and serious even at the start when patton smiles and chuckles and jokes and brushes it off logan just gets frustrated and upset. logan is SO angry literally he is glaring at patton when patton brushes it off and makes jokes abt it and he snaps.

logan actually very seriously tells patton this is self harm and patton goes WHAT nonono no its not i dont know why youre getting so worked up

and logan fucking SNAPS like "Youre not giving your body what it needs to survive because you dont think your worth that!! you're neglecting your basic needs to the point of needing urgent medical care, doesnt that sound familiar??? doesnt that sound like something we've both been through before???" clearly referencing his eating disorder

and pattons eyes go wide and he profusely apologises hes like im so sorry oh my gosh logan honey im sorry did i trigger you im sorry and logans just like STOP APOLOGISING this isnt about me its about you!

and he sso angry bc he thought they trusted each other but the fact that patton didnt tell him when he literally couldnt breathe is so scary to logan

but that is basically an argument bc logan was so fucking worried and devastated that patton has ignored his health to such an extent and vee gets nervous bc both her and roman can hear them yelling and she thinks the cgs will breakup bc they "had a fight"

but once theyre finished talking and vee shakily asks if theyre not gonna be a family anymore they'll of course comfort faer and talk abt it, its not a fight its a disagreement and mummys and daddys have those sometimes. theyre still a family and they still love each other very very much. they all soend their family day together as usual, though patton isnt as able to get up and play with roman understandably

also the fact this all comes around the same week patton and logan tell vee that janus wants to babysit, thats why patton has been absent from the blog recently i guess bc hes been keeping busy trying to work through his feelings of janus wanting to come in

hhh yeah... the way it lines up to patton's other insecurities abt janus coming into the family and it all just piles on too much all at once

so on monday morning logan goes with patton to get more inhalers and they actually stay out for while like they go to a forest or smth just to be alone and help patton recenter a little - he's always loved being in nature, it really brings him a lot of peace, being in nature is really the best way to keep patton grounded from his dissociation, thats why hes always gardening

and logan doesnt want to be angry at him and he knows patton needs support and comfort atm even is patton doesnt think he does so they have a calm day just being together and logan trying to remind patton that hes there for him

HHH stop bc they YEAH bc they kinda had a fight even though it did get 'resolved' but they needed to take time to reconnect their energies and like show each other (and specifically logan show patton) that their love is still secure and their friendship is still strong - just the quiet care of logan taking patton somewhere they can just be alone without responsibilities

secretly patton was rlly upset that logan got angry with him but he didnt show it but logan KNOWS him and he knows he needs to fix it with queality time (pats love lang) because pattons been alone a lot recently, its just been that he keeps busy and accidentaly distanced himself bc the others would all be busy and hanging out in some way and he fet a bit abandoned but yeah logan is dedicating the whole day to him

and patton does end up talking abt his inner turmoil a little but not until theyre like in the middle of the forest and hes a lot calmer and theres no one around, he just feels so much calmer and safer in nature to open up like that.

and this is when patton tells logan about his worries about janus becoming closer to vee, and how its lovely for them but what if it hurts vee, what if they dont get along, what if they DO get along and vee wants to move back with janus. Logan doesnt say anything to the worries, he knows patton just needs to blurt them out while he can, while it mixes with the sounds of nature.

then patton mentions quietly that dr picani phoned him a couple weeks ago and told him that he would like to offer patton a trial session of therapy - not with vee, just patton. logan very calmly asks if that sounds like sometnging that might be helpful for patton and patton just giggles nervously "um i dont know. Vee has therapy"

logan frowns. "yes she does. but that doesnt mean you cant have it too, if you would like it"

patton goes quiet and looks anxious, scratching at the moss on the log theyve sat down on. so logan takes his hand and looks very earnestly at him and says gently "i would like you to at least accept the trial session. It is your decision but... i think it might be worth a try"

patton nods a little, just looking at their intertwined fingers. and after a long silence where they can just hear the birds tweeting and the wind rustling the leaves and small animals scurrying along the grass, patton finally looks up at logan and breathes "i'll go to therapy"

and when patton says that out loud suddenly his eyes well up and he sees logan smile at him - a little sad and a lot proud - and feels his hand squeeze and the tears just dont stop coming and he hides his eyes but laughs nervously like haha dont know why im crying this is so silly! but logan doesnt say anything to it, he just pulls patton into his side and rests his head on pattons head...

and patton keeps trying to laugh and joke but its so choked and sad and nervous and wet and logan wraps his other arm around patton too and just grntly whispers "pumpkin, its okay if youre not happy right now."

and patton just starts sobbing into logans shoulder and logan holds him so tight as they sit on the log

patton cant cope with silence when its about him yknow, he couldnt handle logan not laughing or tutting at his jokes so he just kept joking until logan insisted its ok to be sad

so once they get home logan sits with pstton while he phones dr picani and books his first solo therapy session for friday morning

[marinette-lives-here]

First fic for this blog lol. This is really old. So it started as a little back and forth between me and an ex friend of mine discussing like. Virgil used to be a dark side right? So who says a dark side couldn't have been a light side? And yeah. It kinda turned into lots of moceit too lol. I have more of this kind of stuff too if anyone actually likes this. I'm talking a lot now though so just. Yeah here

(THIS ALSO REQUIRES MULTIPLE POSTS SO THIS IS PART ONE)

What if whenever Patton hugged someone they immediately got super happy no matter what?

Sometimes to the point of, say, forgetting what they were doing before the hug?

Patton wants people to be happy no matter what, so whenever one of the others is crying and his words couldn't comfort them, he'd give them a hug, thinking that he solved the issue, and he did to some extent, but when he's doing so he's actually giving out his own happiness, which eventually leads to why Patton would more often than not fake his happiness on numerous occasions, because he had given too much of his own happiness away.

What if Virgil did something similar?

Anytime he hugged anyone they'd immediately get so anxious no matter what that it'd have the same effect.

The others would know about it to some extent of course; "Okay so Virge hugs me I'm anxious, Patt hugs me and I'm happy. Got it."

But neither of them would explain further because if the others knew it somewhat fixed Virgil's anxiety they'd want him to do it more often and he couldn't do that to them.

And if the others knew it somewhat made Patton more upset then they wouldn't let him do it anymore, and Patton needed to be able to.

Virgil and Patton's s/os would unknowingly do this to people.

Like during arguments they'd have Patt or Virge hug the person their s/o was arguing with so that they'd forget that they were arguing, and when asked what they were doing previously they'd most likely get a response like, for example, "Agreeing with Janus."

And this would just hurt Patton or the other person in the argument without the s/o's knowledge.

And along with how Logan noticed everyone's traits on their cuddling tricks, he'd at least know that Virgil's hugging made him a bit less anxious, and Patton's just made him tired, yet Logan didn't think the actual emotion was sadness.

He would confront them about it one day.

"Virgil you've been less anxious after hugs. Are you passing off your anxiety?"

And-

"Patton why do you look so tired after hugging others? I understand you're making them happy but why does it tire you out so much?"

Both of them would lie about it happening and say that it's not so that they'd continue being treated normally and have free range of when they hugged the others.

Virgil would make some bullshit excuse.

"No, stupid, I'm just distracted by the fact of how funny it is that I've made others feel like that" because that sounds reasonable, considering it's Virgil.

But Patton is Patton and hates lying with every fiber of his being (Patton hates lying because it's what caused Janus to turn to a dark side and leave him-), so it's harder for him to lie to Logan.

"Uh, well, I don't really get 'tired,' it's just probably you overthinking. You do tend to do that sometimes Logie."

Virgil would try to help him out and nod his head though, of course.

Now, Janus has always been able to sense what's true and what's not, since he was honesty and is now deceit.

Now that he's deceit though, he can sense whenever anyone tells a lie.

So only a couple seconds after Logan begrudgingly agrees with Virgil and Patton, Janus shows up.

"Alright, which one of you was lying?" he would say, looking between all three of the others.

Logan freezes and stares at the other two as Patton looks down upset at being caught lying about this.

Logan is feeling upset because he had a trusted friend just try to deceive him, Patton is just about on the verge of crying, and Virgil is now just vibing with takis in a corner while watching.

Logan stares for a few more minutes before going, "So then you did, Patton?"

And Janus glances around the room feeling all the tension before going, "What was the conversation about, exactly?"

Virgil just casually answers with, "Hugs."

So Janus says, "Ohh, you mean how Patton gives people 'his happy'!" and suddenly everyone in the room is frozen, because not even Virgil was told by Patton the details, and Patton is even more upset that Janus just exposed him like that.

Patton and Janus immediately get into an argument over it and Patton accidentally slips up and instinctively calls Janus "Honesty."

Janus goes quiet and looks down.

Patton is confused at first before he realized what he'd done and starts apologizing over and over again.

Janus said it was fine, he knew Patton didn't mean to, but it still hurt a bit.

Janus started to walk to his room but before he did he calmly said, "I'm not feeling to well..... See you, Mora," and proceeded to sink into his room.

Patton started crying and sank into his room as well.

Logan is beyond confused because he was under the impression that Honesty disappeared ages ago, considering no one had bothered to tell him about Janus, after all.

Logan was in shock over the whole situation. He stood there frozen like a Microsoft error as Virgil whispered, "Oh shit.." under his breath before shoving another Taki into his mouth.

Roman walked in, noticing the expression on both Logan and Virgil's faces and said, "Y'all act like you've seen a ghost-" and proceeded to take a Taki from Virgil.

Virgil is pissed beyond belief, having spent so long trying to help Janus forget all about everything that happened when he was still Honesty.

Virgil would shove Roman away before sinking away to find Janus.

Roman was beyond confused. "Care to explain, nerd?"

It would take a minute before the realization hit Logan.

"Oh," he would just mumble, "Janus is Honesty....." and Roman would be even more confused by that and say, "No.....? Janus is Deceit?"

And Logan would forcibly bring Remus in and say, "You need to check on Patton. Him and Janus had a small argument. I need to talk to Roman."

So Remus would go to Patton's room.

Logan would explain to Roman about the entire situation that had just went down in the living room to Roman.

"So, I'm assuming you don't remember but there once was a side for honesty. Before the feud broke out between you and Remus, you were both one, correct? You remember that."

Roman nodded his head in agreement and pure confusion.

"Well, you were dating honesty. Kind of. It wasn't truly you, it was Remus. But, since you two shared a conscience, you were as well. Then you made the decision that you liked me, and Honesty saw us kissing. And they had run away. Nobody knew where they'd went, but now, from what I can assume, Honesty became a dark side, becoming the opposite of what he was previously; Deceit."

Roman stood there in shock. He had once dated the slimey snake that was Janus? And cheated on him?

Well, he supposed it wasn't really him, but he'd made his brother lose his boyfriend.

Roman felt awful and soon realized something was on his face. A tear streamed down from Roman's right eye, making his vision blurry. He ran off.

Logan tried to say something, but before he could, Roman was gone.

"Hm," Logan mumbled as he sank back down into his own room. He'd comfort Roman when Roman was able to talk to people. For now he obviously needed time to himself.

Meanwhile Remus sunk into Patton's room, seeing the other curled up in his bed crying.

Remus wasn't quite entirely up for the idea of comforting Morality (he's still a l i t t l e bit bitter of the way his ex always did and still watches the other longingly), but he was still his friend, so he'd do so anyway.

Remus would walk over and sit next to him.

"Uh.. The nerd said something happened between you and Janus. I'm not entirely sure what exactly happened, but uhm, wanna talk about it-?"

Remus sunk into Patton's room, seeing the other curled up in his bed crying. Remus wasn't quite entirely up for the idea of comforting Morality (he's still a l i t t l e bit bitter of the way his ex always did and still watches the other longingly) but he was still his friend so he'd do so anyway. Remus would walk over and sit next to him. "Uh.. The nerd said something happened between you and Janus. I'm not entirely sure what exactly happened, but uhm, wanna talk about it-?"

"..... Not really," Patton would mumble, scooting a bit away from Remus.

Remus would just sigh and say, "It might help a bit d- Patt." (I̶ l̶i̶k̶e̶ t̶h̶e̶ t̶h̶o̶u̶g̶h̶t̶ t̶h̶a̶t̶ C̶r̶e̶a̶t̶i̶v̶i̶t̶y̶ a̶n̶d̶ L̶o̶g̶i̶c̶ u̶s̶e̶d̶ t̶o̶ c̶a̶l̶l̶ P̶a̶t̶t̶o̶n̶ a̶n̶d̶ J̶a̶n̶u̶s̶ d̶a̶d̶ a̶n̶d̶ m̶̶o̶̶m̶̶)

"I don't care," Patton would mumble.

"C'mon dad-"

"Shut the hell up Creativity! Go bother Honesty or something!" Patton would suddenly yell before quickly covering his mouth as his eyes widened at the realization of what just came out of his mouth.

It's what he normally said when the other two used to pester him like that! It was instinct! He didn't mean to!

Remus would just immediately snap at him-

"I don't plan on going to try to talk to my boyfriend that you fucking stole, asshole!"

Remus would proceed to sink to his own room as Patton sat there so shocked at the other's words that his tears had stopped flowing.

M e a n w h i l e, Virgil arrived in Janus' room to see Janus, his knees to his chest and his arms wrapped around himself.

It sounded like he was mumbling something..... And then Janus suddenly started to cry.

He buried his head in between his knees as he sobbed.

Virgil stared at him with concern written across his face.

He walked over to Janus and sat next to him on his bed.

"Janus..... I-" Virgil wasn't the best at comforting people, so he didn't truly know what to say.

He wanted to hug him instead, but couldn't hug him. It'd just give Janus more anxiety.

"Just to let you know..... I would hug you right now if I could....."

Janus froze up a little and pulled his head out of his knees. His eyes looked almost bloodshot from all the tears and his cheeks and nose were a strong shade of pink from his nose running.

He tilted his head and looked at Virgil in confusion, causing Virgil to realize that he'd said a bit too much.

"Oh, uh- I- Just-" Virgil went silent for a moment. "..... I'll tell you later."

"Tell me now....." Janus mumbled. "It might help distract me a bit from..... You know..... What just happened....." He tightened his grip around himself. "Is it- Is it like, uhm, his thing?"

"Tell me now.." Janus mumbled. "It might help distract me a bit from.. You know.. What just happened.." He tightened his grip around himself. "Is it- Is it like, uhm, his thing?"

"Yeah..... Essentially, I guess."

Virgil crossed his legs and looked down to mess with his chipped nails.

"It's like his, but for my benefit insteas of other's. It rubs my anxiety off on the person(s) I hug..... And I don't want to give you more stress than you're already dealing with- So-"

Virgil felt embarrassed. He didn't know why, but he did. He continued to pick at the chipped black nail polish that was on his nails. He had lost a bet to Roman and that was the punishment.

"So..... Anything I can do for ya.....?" Virgil quietly asked Janus as he looked up at him.

"I'd just..... Like a distraction....." Janus mumbled. "Let's just talk about some random stuff please.....? Uh..... I- I have a similar thing too. Makes people more inclined to uh- To tell the truth. Ah, of course, it doesn't make them tell the truth, they just feel like doing so for a while after, I guess..... That's how it normally goes at least....." Janus had started to unconsciously scratch at his arm.

"Oh.....! That's cool..... Uhm- I have a pet piranha now-" Virgil said nervously. "I don't remember when or how I got them though- They were just kinda there-" he explained to Janus who now looked overly confused and concerned, wide eyed as he looked at Virgil.

"W- What.....? Did I do something-?" he asked. "Ah, actually, I think Remus put it in my room as a prank but now their name is Aléjandro and they're non-bianary-" Virgil explained.

"You- You kept a piranha that Remus made in your room- And named it-" Janus sputtered out. "I- Virgil why-"

"Don't judge me- And the name was the third choice. It was Payton, Char, or Aléjandro, and I chose the best one-" Virgil said. "Don't come at me- Wanna meet them-?" Virgil asked a bit too calmly.

"If I end up smelling even slightly like your piranha, Mora would find it and kill it and you know that-" Janus said, shaking his head, yet smiling.

It was just so Virgil, for him to keep a piranha that Remus made-

(Janus had named his snake that we all know he has Mora. For obvious reasons-)

"But it's a piranha, how would we know that they wouldn't beat Mora?" Virgil questioned, semi seriously, but now actually wanting to know who'd win.

"Because Mora is the best, and would freaking eat your Aléjandro the piranha-" Janus stated simply as Mora appeared from seemingly nowhere since she'd kept hearing her name and sat across Virgil's shoulders.

It'd been a while since she saw Virgil since it'd been a while since he'd been in the room.

"I- I would say bet, but Mora is too cute to be put in a fight-" Virgil said as he pet the snake around his shoulders.

"Yes. She's my babyyyyy-" Janus said happily, smiling at her.

Mora hissed appreciatively before moving so she was laid across both boys, glancing at both of them.

"Damn- Literally any time I come in this room you make me want a snake-" Virgil said, looking at Mora and stroking her head.

Virgil was seemingly lost in thought and then suddenly said, "How pissed off would you be if I named every pet I ever got Aléjandro?"

"Oh my gods, please do that-"  Janus laughed. "That would be beyond entertaining."

Mora looked up at Virgil before quietly hissing and moving and leaving the room. "Well fuck-"

Janus and Virgil left the room soon after, looking for her.

"Mora? Mora?" Virgil called before finding Patton laughing with Mora around his shoulders.

"Ah! Janus, she's in here!" he called and Janus ran in.

"You found Mor-?" Janus cut himself off as he saw Patton sitting there with the snake.

Patton looked up. "You finally name her? Mora, huh?" he asked, grinning.

"Shuttup....." Janus mumbled, the human half of his face lit up a deep red.

Patton just giggled slightly and grabbed onto Janus' hand, tugging him down next to him and leaning against him.

Janus hesitantly intertwined their fingers as Mora stretched across both of their shoulders now rather than just Patton's.

Patton sighed contentedly as he snuggled up closer. "I missed this," he mumbled.

Neither of them noticed as Virgil sunk down to Roman's room while Janus responded.

"Me too....."

"So, Virgil went to comfort you then, I'm guessing?" Patton asked softly, rubbing his thumb back and forth across the back of Janus' hand, something he used to do to calm the other.

Janus hummed in agreement to the question. "Who went to talk to you?" he mumbled.

"Ah..... Remus," Patton answered quietly.

[exhaustedfander]

For the one shot requests: Perhaps some Moceit fluff? Maybe some cuddles? Whatever you’d like 💙

In all fairness this said “whatever you’d like” so it’s got some angst, but not to worry. It’s my writing, so it’s a good old hurt/comfort with plenty of cuddling. I’d love to hear what you guys think, and reblogs are always appreciated!

ao3 link

My writing master post

word count: 2,952

Break a Little, Heart of Mine [Moceit]

Janus didn’t know how he’d gotten to this point. He thought back to when things first started when everything was just beginning to creep in, all so new and underdeveloped. He should’ve cut himself off from the feelings the moment they arose and now it was far too late to amputate, the disease having long since spread. There was no saving him now.

There were so many instances where he could’ve left, abandoned the newly forged relationships, and shut himself off again. It would’ve been easier that way, going back to being the villain, despised and untrusted. After all, who in their right mind puts their trust in a liar?

But he isn’t just a liar, now is he? He’s so much more than that, so much more than he might like to admit. And now the others knew too. Self-preservation is quite hard to villainize once you see it for what it is. Did they see him for what he was? He sincerely hoped not.

He shouldn’t have let them in, the others. He had a job to do, that’s the extent of it, and he did his job well. He’d maintained the persona of a wrongdoer for so long because it suited him. No one needed to trust him, not even Thomas, so long as he could do his job in peace. He would help Thomas without the gift of praise, he would do it all in spite of the other’s contempt, he would do anything necessary to ensure Thomas had the best life possible even if he hated him. Did it sting? Knowing the others had so much distain for him, that his host despised his very existence? What a preposterous question.

It hurt like hell. It burned, festering like a fire in the pit of his stomach for years with only Remus for company. Virgil had been there once, they’d been close. Janus didn’t like to think about that, knowing dwelling on the past would only distract him.

He supposed for a while not absolutely everyone despised him. Remus had never seemed to have any ill-will towards him, though it would be hard to tell if he did. The way Remus treated a friend and a foe was eerily similar. Janus had long since stopped trying to dissect Remus, looking for some hidden, deeper person hidden beneath the gore and crude humor. Remus was Remus, regardless of anything else. He was unabashedly himself, regardless of how much others might wish him to act otherwise. Honestly, he was a consistency that Janus was relieved he could always fall back on. He got on Janus’s nerves at the best of times, but that didn’t change the fact that they found company in being misfits.

Except…Janus wasn’t sure how much of an outcast he was now. Not after everything that had happened, not after Thomas had said those words that carried more weight than he would ever comprehend: I don’t know that we are. Roman had challenged Janus’s being present and Thomas had disagreed, rebelling against his hero.

Janus had never required Thomas’s respect, he’d never needed his admiration but now that he had it? He hardly knew what to make of it. It would be a lie to say that Janus hadn’t imagined a world in which Thomas cared for him and included him just as he did the other sides, but that had been nothing more than a fantasy as far as he was concerned. He’d never truly anticipated it, and now here he was, accepted, welcomed into the conversation, even.

And then there was Patton.

Janus’s feelings for Patton had always been fairly complicated. Their very existence made opposition inevitable; morality and deceit go about as hand-in-hand as oil and water. He’d fought to get his voice heard for years, but Patton wouldn’t allow it, too lost in a fantasy world where no wrong existed and lies were a gateway to evil. For some time Janus considered he might’ve hated Patton for what he’d put him through.

It was difficult, hating him, even after everything. Patton was so soft, so full of love for everyone except him. Janus knew that despite everything, Patton was well-intentioned in everything that he did. He would never want to hurt someone, certainly not Thomas, and yet once he had he lost control.

Janus had to admit, seeing Patton transform into a giant video-game frog with rippling abs was just about the strangest thing he’d ever borne witness to. Patton’s meltdown was not without consequences, either. Finally, after so many years of abject denial, Paton was forced to face the fact that morality is by no means a black-and-white issue. Selfishness is not equal with immorality and gluttony, and for the first time in front of the light sides, Janus presented himself fully. He wasn’t just Deceit, nor self-preservation alone; he was Janus.

Sharing his name hadn’t been something he’d intended to do, but Roman had questioned him with fear, asking how he could possibly be trusted. Revealing himself was something he wasn’t sure he’d ever get the chance to do, that he’d ever have the courage to do. It wasn’t something he’d ever be able to take back even if he wanted to.

He’d dreamt of it sometimes, removing a glove, holding up his right hand and saying, clearly and confidently: “My name is Janus.”

This dream had never included Roman laughing in his face. It was instinctual, the retort he made comparing Roman to his twin. It wasn’t fair to either of them in the end, especially not Remus, but even now Janus didn’t fully regret what he’d done. It had taken so much to tell him, he knew Roman knew it wasn’t easy, and yet he’d laughed at him. He’d insulted him. And then he’d promptly sunk out when he got his feelings hurt.

So Thomas’s acceptance of him was something he hadn’t been counting on, but Patton? Now that was something else entirely.

Patton had been the first to use his name. Janus didn’t want to admit the way he liked his name on Patton’s lips, hearing it breathed out by someone who’d opposed him for so long. And he’d asked, genuinely and frightened if there was a limit to saying sorry to someone. Patton had hurt Thomas and Janus could tell how much it broke his heart knowing that. Now more than ever Janus could see that Patton had been doing his very best, flawed though his views were. He was so frightened and ill-equipped and now he seemed terrified that Thomas’s love for him would waver because of the mistakes that he’d made.

Maybe that’s where it all started, the feelings that had since invaded every inch of him. Patton had used his name and it had made him feel soft, and seen, and happy. Janus was foolish enough to indulge in this joy, telling himself that it was a small allowance he wouldn’t give into. He certainly wouldn’t endear himself to Patton, certainly, he had more self-preservation than that.

As it turned out, no. No, he didn’t.

He was instead spending more and more time with Patton, accompanying him in the common room or while he was (attempting) to bake. Janus often had to offer aid with that, otherwise, Patton tended to get distracted. They're time spent together is something that, despite his better judgment, was something Janus had become dangerously fond of. Patton himself, it seemed, was someone he’d become dangerously fond of.

Once the feelings began to escalate Janus did everything he could to bite them back and simply enjoy time with his friend. But then Patton had kissed him.

They’d been watching a movie alone together in the common room, a film Janus can’t recall considering how distracted he’d been the entire duration of it. Patton was a very touchy-feely person, Janus understood this well after years of seeing him interact with the others, but none of that could prepare him for Patton cuddling up against him under a blanket, leaning his head on his shoulder. “Is this okay?” Patton asked, and Janus had wanted to reply: “No! No this is far too much to handle! This is dangerous and all wrong, and something I should not be allowing happen!” But he couldn’t, not when that selfish, lonely part of himself had longed for something like this for so long.

And when their faces had been dangerously close together Patton had asked in a small, trembling voice, “Can I kiss you?” Janus should’ve said no, he should’ve left the room and never spoken to Patton again, but instead he simply nodded, giving into foolishness.

Janus continued to lie to himself, promising that he wouldn’t become too attached and would know when to take a step back. But despite all his best efforts, Janus was getting wrapped up in Patton and all that he represented. His feelings for the moral side were only deepening, their moments spent together become more frequent and intimate. He didn’t want to admit that he was becoming addicted to Patton’s kiss – that he was becoming reliant on the joy he felt when he was in any proximity to him.

Now here Janus was, lying in Patton’s bed beside his lover; how had he allowed things to go this far?

Janus was sure his feelings were reciprocated to some extent, but certainly not to the level he felt for Patton. There was no way.

Janus sat up in bed, his heart determined to beat right out of his chest. He considered pushing the covers off of himself and slinking back to his own room. He considered never returning, never facing Patton again unless it was absolutely necessary, he considered –

“Janus?” Janus flinched at the sound of his name, seeing Patton blinking awake beside him. “Honey, what’s wrong?”

His chest tightened at the sound of the pet name. Patton had been calling him so many things lately: honey, sweetheart, darling. Janus could hardly stand the way it made his heart break a little more every time he heard it.

“Nothing’s wrong, Pat,” he said far too quickly, cursing the weakness in his tone, “Go back to sleep.”

Well, shit, Janus thought to himself as Patton flicked on the lamp and rubbed his eyes before sliding on his glasses. Janus cast his gaze on the comforter, tracing the patterns of cats and dogs on the baby blue fabric before feeling a hand settle onto his shoulder, despising warmth blooming up his arm.

“Jan –.”

“I said I’m fine,” Janus hissed, hoping it would keep Patton’s concerns at bay, “nothing to worry about.” Patton sighed beside him, refusing to remove his hand. Janus wondered, stupidly, if Patton could feel him beginning to tremble.

“Sweetheart, I know something’s the matter. Something’s been the matter for some time, hasn’t it?” Janus’s silence spoke volumes. “I was trying to give you space and allow you some time to come to me with whatever it is, but I don’t think I can ignore it anymore. I’m sorry I ignored it at all. You know you can tell me anything, don’t you?” Janus continued to refuse meeting Patton’s gaze, his eyes still stubbornly stuck on the comforter.

“Not this, Patton. It’s – it’s too much,” Janus rasped out. His voice was fragile, unlike anything he’d ever known. Janus recalled a time not long ago where he was confident in his strength, in his judgment. Now, look at him, shivering under Patton’s touch, near tears because his feelings were too much to fucking handle.

“What’s too much? Please, I’m worried, Jan. You haven’t been acting like yourself.”

I don’t feel like myself, Janus thought to himself bitterly.

He’d been a villain for so long, no-good. It had been easy, even if it hurt, even if he longed for affection. At least he didn’t have to deal with these god damn emotions. God, he sounded like Logan.

“All of this,” Janus gritted out vaguely, finally meeting Patton’s flickering gaze, “You. The…” Janus swallowed the forming lump in his throat, squeezing his eyes shut, “…relationship that we have. I was the villain for so long, I don’t know how to be anything else. I don’t know how to do this.”

Janus shivered as he felt Patton take his left hand in his own, rubbing his thumb along the scales.

“But that isn’t true. You aren’t a villain – you never really were. Janus, honey, I’m so sorry for how I treated you for so long. I didn’t ever consider your worth and that is something I will never forgive myself for,” Patton’s voice wavered sadly before he continued, “But that doesn’t mean I can’t be better now. As for us, am I overwhelming you?”

“I –,” Janus’s voice faltered, words failing.

“Talk to me, Jan. I just want things to be okay, but I don’t know how I can fix anything if I don’t know what’s going on.” Janus wanted to sink out of the room, to sob long and hard alone. He didn’t want to face this, but the heartbroken way that Patton’s spoken to him is something he can’t disregard. He let go of Patton’s hand.

“Truthfully, I don’t know how to do any of this. I’m afraid of the intimacy that y-you’ve shown me. I’m afraid of how strongly I feel for you, Patton.” The silence that hung over them was positively devastating before Patton spoke, soft and genuine:

“Janus…you know I love you, right?”

Janus’s heart panged as his head swilled to look at Patton whose eyes shone with sincerity.

“What – what did you just sssay?” The hiss that invaded his voice took them both equally by surprise. Janus was rarely at the mercy of his snake-traits, as it only happened in moments of intense emotion. It made sense, he supposed bitterly.

“I said: I love you,” Patton repeated, smiling at the flush that spread across the human side of Janus’s face.

“N-no you don’t,” Janus said as though he couldn’t sense when the others were lying. If Patton was being anything other than truthful, he would’ve been able to tell.

“Yes, I do. I didn’t want to say it before, I dunno, I figured I might scare you away.”

“Scare me away?” The notion was positively preposterous. How could Patton ever think that he could frighten Janus to any capacity? “I – are you being serious? The idea of you doing anything like that is ludicrous. I’ve just been so…”

“Afraid?” Patton supplied, his hand returning to Janus’s shoulder. Janus nodded, almost sadly. “Hey, that’s okay. It’s alright to be scared.” He shook his head.

“Not when it’s me. I’m not used to,” Janus gestured vaguely, “any of this. I’m not equipped to handle this kindness, or compassion, or love. How can you love me?” Patton frowned, wincing at the insecurity in Janus’s tone that reminded him far too much of himself.

“Because you’re you, Jan,” he answered as if it was that simple, “You’re kind and smart, and you always have everyone’s best interest in mind. I love you, Janus. I don’t know how it took me so long to realize, but I do.” Janus’s instincts to flee fell away as Patton’s threw his arms over his shoulder, pulling him into a tight embrace.

“I love you too,” Janus admitted breathlessly, sighing as Patton ran a hand through his hair.

“We’ll tell the others about us in the morning, okay?” Janus blinked, yet refused to leave Patton’s arms.

“Really? Are – are you sure?” They both hadn’t mentioned the state of their relationship to any of the other sides, as Janus had been convinced Patton wouldn’t want to do so, and maybe Patton had thought the same about him. Knowing many of the light’s opinions of him, Janus didn’t have the highest of hopes for what the reactions would be.

“I’m positive. Unless you don’t want to yet?” Janus buried his face in Patton’s chest.

“Oh no, I despise the idea of everyone knowing of our relationship, so I can continue to feel like I need to keep it a secret.” Patton giggled, bright and pretty.

“That’s what I thought. Did talking make you feel better?” Patton massaged his scalp, making Janus melt further into him.

“Mmm yessss,” he hissed contently, earning another laugh, “I uh, mean, yes. It did. I’m still fairly out of my depth with this whole, “being accepted and loved thing.” Not that I told you any of that. I can’t have my reputation completely tarnished.

“My lips are sealed.”

“Good,” Janus said through a yawn, “But you’re certainly making it easier. I’m sorry…I should’ve talked to you.”

“It’s okay, honey. I understand. Feelings can be tricky, we’ll just take things one slither at a time.” Janus nodded against him with a strained laugh, sighing as Patton shut out the light and wrapped his arms around him again.

“Night-night, Jan. I love you,” Patton said, pressing a tired kiss to his lips before shutting his eyes.

“Goodnight, dearest,” Janus crooned, finally giving way to all of the affection that had been building inside of himself, “I love you too.”

For too long, Janus hadn’t thought himself capable of love, nor deserving of it. Once he received it, the fear that such things were temporary or not as intense as his feelings plagued his mind and for the first time in a long time, he got scared. Janus was happy to have his fears invalidated, though. The idea of having someone who truly, genuinely cared so deeply about him was still a frightening concept, but one that he was becoming sure he could handle.

Janus shut his eyes, sleeping deeply, and dreaming of love.

=+=

[miguel-manbemel]

Aspects & Fanfics Ep. 44: Beware the Paladin Part 4: The Gift from the Core

Here comes another part of this five-part story on this fic inspired on Sanders Sides by Thomas Sanders, Joan S. and the Foster Dawg Team. I hope that you’re still enjoying this story and see ya in two weeks with the finale of Beware the Paladin.

SYNOPSIS: Patton tries to get in touch with the Mind Palace Core to find a way to cure Janus and wake him up, and this way being able to restore Thomas’ connection with his Sides. Meanwhile Virgil and Roman try to fix their relationship, very damaged by the Paladin’s words.

WARNINGS: Slight, implied innuendo references, mentions to divorce and breakups.

EPISODE INDEX

[Joan arrives to their home. Talyn is there]

TALYN: Joan? What are you doing here? I thought you were staying with Thomas this week.

JOAN: I am, Talyn, but the truth is I’m gonna need you to come with me, at least today.

TALYN: What? Why? Is something wrong with Thomas?

JOAN: To an extent, it is. Don’t worry, it’s not too serious, but Thomas needs you.

TALYN: Okay, I’ll help in any way I can… but I’m gonna need you to give me a moment to get dressed and put a basic makeup on. I’m not getting out of the house like this.

JOAN: Okay, it’s on me, I should have phoned you in advance so that you would get ready. Don’t worry, it’s not a strict emergency, but please, don’t take too long. I don’t want to leave Thomas alone for too long, at least for this week.

TALYN: [going to their room while Joan waits on the living room] Why don’t you bring me up to date about what has happened while I’m getting ready?

JOAN: Sure. You see, as you know, I went to the hospital to get Thomas and lift him home. After two weeks of treatment, he’s totally recovered from his bipolar disorder crisis. He was so happy, so lively, with such an excellent mood… Until he tried to summon his Sides and discovered he couldn’t anymore. Not only that. When I summoned them, because I still can, he couldn’t see or hear them and they couldn’t physically touch him, as if they were ghosts.

TALYN: [from their room] Wow… that must have been a shock for him.

JOAN: It was, for him and for the Sides too. Logan thinks it’s because of the medication, which has disturbed Thomas’ brainwaves and weakened the connection. I had the idea, and Logan confirmed that it could work, that you could try to hypnotize us both again to reestablish that connection by synchronizing Thomas’ current brainwaves with mine. That’s why I came here to fetch you.

TALYN: Oh, of course, I’ll be happy to help. I’ll do it as soon as when we get there.

JOAN: I hope you can, because, you see, there’s another part of the story. Two weeks ago, as I told you back then, when the Paladin was on the loose, he attacked Janus and hit him on the head with his heavy sword, causing him a traumatic brain injury. The point is he has been unconscious ever since, and without him awaken we can’t perform the hypnosis, because all Sides must be in autopilot when we do it. I’m sure you remember what happened when they weren’t.

TALYN: Oh… I see… Is there anything we can do to help?

JOAN: We can’t, but Patton has stepped in to help. Logan suggested that only Patton, as a former Master Side, can help Janus wake up. He’s going to go to the Mind Palace Core to try to get in touch with the Core itself so it can give him a solution. He’s probably doing it right at this moment. The problem is that it’s too dangerous. The Core is in many ways like a black hole, it can absorb Sides and destroy them. Patton is literally risking his life to save Janus’.

TALYN: Goodness, I hope he’s all right…

JOAN: Me too, Talyn… Okay, I brought you up to date. Are you ready yet?

TALYN: Almost ready. Just give me a second to retouch my eyebrows and we’re good to go.

JOAN: Good, because if Patton is successful, Thomas will need us there. I really hope he’s successful, for Patton’s sake, but also for Janus’ and Thomas’ sake. I fear what will become of Thomas if he can’t make contact with his Sides anymore.

[Talyn gets out of their room]

TALYN: Okay, I’m ready.

JOAN: Good, let’s go then.

[Joan and Talyn get out of the house and into the car]

[intro sequence]

[Patton rises up in the Mind Palace Center. It’s exactly as they left it when Chris’ rescue was over months ago. Chris’ arrow that hit the Dark Master is even still on the floor, full of dust]

PATTON: Gosh, does no one clean this place, ever? This is gonna be the center… of criticism… Okay, Patton, that was really awful. You know that when you’re so distressed your jokes are horrible, so stop making bad jokes no one’s gonna hear… There’s the Core. As bright as always… [shows a face of fear] as dangerous as always… [takes a deep breath] but it’s our only hope now, so please, Core, have mercy on us, and especially on me right now. First, I’m gonna need to secure myself so that I don’t get absorbed if I get too close.

[Patton summons a rope tied to a stake firmly stuck into the floor. Then he ties the rope firmly around his wrist. He unties his cat onesie and throws it behind him]

PATTON: I wouldn’t forgive myself if the onesie got untied and absorbed by the Core, it was given to me by Logan, it’s too much valuable for me. If something happened to me… I want him to keep that garment, so that he can remember me and how much he meant to me… Don’t be so fatalist, Patton, you’re gonna see Logan again in no time, you’ll see… Okay, this should do it. I summoned the stake at least a couple of meters into the ground, which will leave a huge dent on the floor. That’s not a very nice way of treating this sanctuary, but no one’s gonna complain anyway. Sort of, I’m the only Master left out of the Core right now, even if I’m not a Master anymore, so in a way this place is mine now, and besides, I’m positive the only Master inside the Core whose opinion I care about would certainly approve. I hope the rope is strong enough and the stake can hold on in place. My life depends on it… [sighs, then looks at the Core in fear, his whole body is slightly shaking] I’m so scared… this could be my final moment in the Mind Palace… but I have to do this, for Janus, for Thomas… Enough overthinking, Patton. It’s now or never. Let’s go.

[Patton starts walking towards the Core. When he approaches it, he starts feeling a force pulling from him. The rope seems to be strong enough, though, so he keeps on walking. Soon, he’s levitating on the air, tied to the rope which gets tense, as tense as Patton’s gesture]

PATTON: Please, don’t break, rope… I think I’m close enough, though, I can feel all sorts of feelings from inside the Core. I’ll try to enter in communication with these feelings and maybe I’ll receive an answer.

[Patton closes his eyes and concentrates, still levitating, tied to the rope, some brightness glows out of the Core as bright translucent flames that reach Patton. When the translucent flames touch Patton, he starts smiling and nodding, as if he was having a conversation without words, and a bright light-blue aura that starts surrounding him gets in contact with the brightness from the Core. Meanwhile, in Roman’s room, Virgil enters Roman’s bedroom. Roman is in bed there and looks at Virgil]

ROMAN: Hi, my love… How is Thomas doing?

VIRGIL: [cold voice] Fine, I guess… How are you feeling now, Roman?

ROMAN: I’m almost okay now. It’s been bad days, but now that the symptoms are almost gone, I think I’m ready to get out of bed and start a normal life again. Thanks for asking.

VIRGIL: [same cold voice, avoiding eye contact] That’s nice…

[Virgil gets silent. Roman looks at him]

ROMAN: Anyway… How are you doing now, Virgil? Since you moved to the guest bedroom after Patton left to take care of Logan, I barely see you each day, only at meals and you barely share a couple of words with me. This is the longest conversation we’ve had in two weeks.

VIRGIL: Do you even care how I am doing, anyway? I’m okay, I guess…

ROMAN: Virgil, please, we need to talk this out. This dynamic that we have established is unhealthy. At least it’s very hard for me.

VIRGIL: This wasn’t easy for me either. But… I wasn’t ready to face you yet. The Paladin’s words still dance in my head each and every minute, even in my sleep.

ROMAN: I have apologized to you a thousand times already to no avail. Isn’t there any way for you to forgive me?

VIRGIL: “Sorry” isn’t always the magic word that solves each and any issue, Roman. I know you probably are sorry, but that’s not enough to magically fix all of this. Apologizing doesn’t change the facts, nor does it change the pain you made me go through… or the disappointment I feel every time I look at you in the eye. Being close to you… has hurt me these past few days, that’s why I’ve been avoiding you. And I didn’t see a way to stop the pain other than staying away from you.

ROMAN: [both scared and sad] Are you saying that… you want to break up with me?

[Virgil looks at Roman right in the eye for the first time, with a sad face of longing]

VIRGIL: No, I’m not saying that… I have wanted to avoid you… but at the same time I didn’t wanna leave your side and I worried about you and your safety each minute I was away from you. I wanted to avoid you to stop the pain, but at the same time avoiding you caused me more pain, cause I longed for you, so I accomplished nothing. I have thought about that question you’ve just asked, Roman, if I wanted to break up with you. I’ve had plenty of time to meditate about it and every time I always reached the same conclusion: I still wanna fight for our relationship and for our family. I want to believe that there is still a chance for us to go through this crisis and emerge stronger as a couple. I think the only way to stop the pain is by working it out, together, and I’m willing to try if you are. I still love you, Roman.

ROMAN: And I love you too, Virgil, and if you give me the chance to prove to you that my love for you is real, I swear I won’t throw it away.

VIRGIL: One part of me is yelling at me to let you go… but my heart wants me to seek refuge in your arms and never leave your shielding comfort… [looks at Roman with a glance of sadness and overwhelming love at the same time] I guess I’m my father’s son… my heart’s voice is stronger. I love you too much to give you up... maybe I’m bound to love you all of my life, even in spite of myself.

ROMAN: I swear I’ll requite that love as you deserve, Virgil. I’ll make myself worthy of your love for me, I promise. And I also need you in my arms, Virgil. You have no idea how much. Come here, my love.

[Virgil approaches Roman and they both hug and kiss. Meanwhile, Remus, Logan and Ian are still waiting next to Janus’ bed]

LOGAN: He’s taking too long. I’m so worried.

REMUS: Relax, Log, I’m sure Patton will be all right.

LOGAN: I can’t relax, Remus. At this very moment, he could be gone already, and we would never know for certain, because we can’t follow him. I’m so scared for his safety.

IAN: You love Patton very much, don’t you, Logan?

LOGAN: He taught me the real value of feelings, Ian. He taught me the only thing I couldn’t learn myself from my Library, that love is the real force that moves everything, stronger than any other force in the natural world, and worth to fight for more than anything else in life. How could I not love him when it was him who taught me how to love?

IAN: That’s so sweet…

REMUS: A little sappy, but I like sappy sometimes. I understand you, Logan, and I hope that Patton returns, [looking at the unconscious Janus] for both our sake.

LOGAN: I really hope he returns and also that his trip is worth the risk and Janus can be saved too.

REMUS: Thanks, Teach.

[At that moment, Patton appears from the ceiling, landing on the floor in front of Logan. Logan looks at Patton. For a second, he doesn’t react, then his face lightens up and he sports a wide smile, then he hugs Patton]

LOGAN: [happy] Patton, you’re back!

PATTON: Of course I’m back! I would never leave you!

[Logan releases Patton, then Patton summons a green leaf and gives it to Logan, who looks at it, confused]

LOGAN: Uh… what’s this? Something given to you by the Core? I know! We must make an infusion with this leaf, then give it to Janus to drink, or we give a massage on the head with it and he’ll wake up, right?

PATTON: No, Logan. You didn’t let me finish my sentence. I would never leave you. Instead, I just did leaf you… [smiles widely while doing the badoom-tish gesture with his hands]

[Logan is confused for a couple of seconds, then he realizes it’s only one of Patton’s puns and frowns at him]

LOGAN: Why did I marry you, again?

PATTON: [smirks] Because I taught you the real value of feelings and that love is the real force that moves everything, and I also because I taught you how to love, Logan.

LOGAN: You were listening?

PATTON: Not quite. I heard it from the Core. It can see the past and the present of this Mind Palace and it can even go a little bit into the future, and it showed me you would say that at some point in the near future from mine. Did you say it already?

LOGAN: Yeah, I just did… [sighs] And you’re right, I do love you because of that… even in punitive moments like this against all of… me…

PATTON: [smirks] Pun-itive, I see what you did there.

LOGAN: [clears his throat] Patton, let’s get serious. So you got to the Core, right?

PATTON: Yes, I did.

REMUS: And did you get anything useful for Janus?

PATTON: Yes. As I said, I entered in communion with the Core. I almost spoke to it. Well, I did speak to it, without words, but I did. It was the most wonderful feeling I have ever experienced. The Core approved of my intentions, considering them noble and wanted to help me fulfill my purpose. So, the Core gifted me a new ability I’m gonna use right now to help Janus.

IAN: A new ability? What do you mean, Patton?

PATTON: Step aside, let me get closer to Janus.

REMUS: Okay…

[Everyone steps aside and Patton approaches Janus. He puts his hand on Janus’ forehead, then closes his eyes. A light blue aura starts glowing around Patton, and it extends to Janus. The others watch the scene, stunned. After a few seconds, color returns to Janus’ face, then he opens his eyes and the aura disappears]

JANUS: What… what has happened? Where am I? And I know this is not a cliche thing to say in this situation, like, at all.

REMUS: [happy] Janus! You woke up!

[Remus hugs Janus. Janus hugs him back, still confused]

JANUS: I’m totally aware of what’s going on… glad to be back, I guess.

LOGAN: You’ve been knocked out for two weeks. Remus and Ian have been taking care of you all this time.

JANUS: Two weeks!? Oh, now I remember… the Paladin suddenly got in front of me, he hit me hard with his sword… and then, after a split second of a huge headache, everything went black and I lost notion of time. Then, in the darkness I saw a light-blue source of light, and a strange sweet music calling from inside, asking me to get there… and I did… and then I opened my eyes just now.

REMUS: It was Patton. Patton brought you back to life. [Remus hugs Patton] Thank you so much, Patton!

PATTON: It was my pleasure, kiddo. Glad to be able to help.

JANUS: So that light… was you, Patton? How? Wha…? Thank you, Patton. I don’t understand how you did it, but thank you for saving my life.

IAN: We’ll explain in time. Now it is important that, when Joan gives us the signal, we all enter in autopilot. We have to resynchronize Thomas’ brainwaves because he’s lost contact with us and we gotta fix that.

JANUS: Seems there has been a lot going on around here while I was gone. What else did I miss?

IAN: Okay, guys, while you bring him up to date, I’ll go alert the others to be ready. See ya in a moment.

[Ian sinks down, then rises up in Roman’s room, in the living room. Chris is there]

CHRIS: Hi, Ian.

IAN: Hi, Chris, I got good news. Janus has woken up.

CHRIS: [happy] Really? That’s so cool! Is he okay?

IAN: Yes, he’s okay, thanks to Patton, and he’s ready to enter autopilot when Joan gives us the signal. Where are your parents?

CHRIS: Upstairs. I think they’re finally having a good conversation after weeks.

IAN: That’s good to know. The Paladin’s words affected Virgil very much.

CHRIS: Yeah, I know. I had never seen him like that. He’s been so distant of my father… even of me. I even thought that, as soon as father got better, dad was going to ask him for the divorce. I guess he changed his mind, cause when I came around their door to ask what they wanted for dinner, I heard them muffled-giggling and saying loving things to each other. As they usually do after an argument, they took the saying “kiss and makeup” literally, if you know what I mean, so I decided not to disturb them.

IAN: Well, we gotta warn them that they must be in autopilot too…

CHRIS: Oh, don’t worry. I’m positive they’re already in autopilot.

IAN: All right, if you say so. Tell them the good news about Janus when you can, okay?

CHRIS: Okay, I will. Thanks for the warning Ian. Glad that Janus is okay.

IAN: You’re welcome. [sinks down]

CHRIS: Janus waking up, Thomas back to normal, my father almost recovered and my dad giving him another chance… it seems that things are starting to look up at last…

[suddenly there’s angry yelling coming from upstairs]

CHRIS: Perhaps I spoke too soon… What is going on up there? Dad! Father! What’s the matter!?

[the sound of the bedroom door slamming open upstairs is heard and Virgil rushes down the stairs. Roman follows him. Virgil is furious, Roman tries to calm him down]

ROMAN: I swear it wasn’t me who said that, and I swear it’s not true!

VIRGIL: Yeah, right! Of course it isn’t true! These words came out of your mouth, I remind you, and the last time the Paladin spoke through your lips, he was saying the truth!

ROMAN: This time, like the last time, he twisted the truth, Virgil! I swear!

CHRIS: Whoa! Whoa! Time up! What is going on here!?

VIRGIL: What is going on here? We were done making… things up, when suddenly the Paladin started speaking through your father’s mouth!

CHRIS: The Paladin? Again?

ROMAN: It was only a few seconds! And I quickly reined him in!

VIRGIL: But not before he said a devastating truth about me! Something that your father thinks for real about me!

CHRIS: And what truth is that if I might know?

VIRGIL: He blames me for your leg injury! He doesn’t believe I’m good enough to be your father and he thinks I’m a bad influence for you and you’re better off without me!

CHRIS: What? Father, is that what you think?

ROMAN: I don’t think that! Virgil, you’re good enough to be Chris’ father, I’ve always said that!

VIRGIL: But your thoughts are very different from your sayings! Admit it! Admit you were saying the truth!

ROMAN: I… I’ll only admit that I do believe that you’ve been a hinder in Chris’ development as a Side. And you have to admit it was true as it was you who said it first. But I also believe I’m not better than you on the matter, and I also believe you didn’t do it on purpose and you do your best to change for the better, and that’s what’s important to me! You have to believe me! The Paladin took my thoughts out of context and twisted them! Please, trust me!

VIRGIL: I can’t! I’ve tried, but I can’t trust you anymore! I don’t know when you’re being honest about your feelings towards me, or when you’re lying or hiding things from me! How much are you keeping to yourself about me that you don’t want me to know? Tell me! How much!?

ROMAN: Virgil, please, I swear whatever I avoid saying to you is not as bad as you think it is! Please, don’t be so para…!

[Roman covers his mouth. Virgil looks at Roman with a face of shock that leads to a face of anger and tears]

VIRGIL: Come on, say it! You think I’m a paranoid! At least this time you’ve said it in my face with your own free voice!

ROMAN: Virgil, I… I…

VIRGIL: [yelling] Save your excuses, Roman! I can’t… [makes a pause, fighting tears] I need to leave this room. I need to get away from you.

ROMAN: [horrified] What? Are you… breaking up with me?

VIRGIL: Maybe… Maybe not… I don’t know… I need to think, and I need to be alone to do so. Since now you’re strong enough to stand still, you don’t need my care anymore, so I’m going back to my own room right now.

ROMAN: [in despair] Virgil, please… don’t leave me! Not like this! Not because of this! I swear that I love you! And I know for certain that you love me! Can’t we talk this out like civilized people?

VIRGIL: Not now, Roman. Yes, I still love you to my despair, and I know that, despite it all, you love me, but… sometimes… love is not enough. I need some room to breathe and put my ideas in order. Please, if you love me, don’t go look for me.

ROMAN: [sighs] As you wish, Virgil…

CHRIS: Before you go… Ian has warned us that we must all enter autopilot when Joan gives us the signal, to restore Thomas’ connection with us.

VIRGIL: I understand… Don’t worry about that. I’m gonna stay in autopilot for a very long time. And I’m not ducking out altogether because I don’t want to put Thomas’ mental health at risk again, but right now… I just wanna be alone and not see anyone. Bye, Chris. Goodbye, Roman.

[Virgil sinks down. Roman looks at the empty space where he was standing. Then, tears start falling down his cheeks, and he starts sobbing heavily as if he was running out of air or as if he was on the verge of crying aloud. Chris hugs him]

CHRIS: Father, don’t worry, I’m sure that when his anger wears off, you’ll have your chance to talk to him more calmly. Now give him some time. I’m sure your mutual love will prevail eventually.

ROMAN: [sobbing] I hate the Paladin inside of me. He brings up every wrongdoing I’ve ever done, even in my mind, puts it out of context and uses it against me. I swear I don’t think that Virgil is harmful to you. I swear!

CHRIS: And I believe you, father.

[Suddenly, the sobbing stops abruptly and Roman starts getting sick]

CHRIS: Father? Father, what’s wrong with you!?

[Roman has to rush to the bathroom where he loudly vomits off-screen]

CHRIS: Father! What was that!? Are you okay?

[after some time, he gets out of the bathroom]

ROMAN: Yeah, I don’t know what’s happened to me… I suddenly got very sick and I couldn’t help myself… Perhaps it’s residual effects from the illness, or perhaps it’s because of the nervous breakdown I just had. I hope… because the last time someone vomited like this… But that couldn’t be, that’s impossible. It couldn’t be that… could it?

CHRIS: You lost me…

ROMAN: Never mind, I was talking to myself. It couldn’t be that… I hope…

[Chris stares at Roman with a face of confusion. Then Ian rises up]

IAN: Okay, guys, everything’s ready. Everyone enter autopilot now! Where is Virgil?

CHRIS: He’s in his room.

IAN: Is everything… okay? Roman, your eyes are red and your face is white as a ghost. What happened?

ROMAN: It’s okay, I’ll… I’ll be fine… it’s only a… a disagreement between Virgil and I, that’s all…

IAN: Okay, I’m lost, how could everything here change so radically in a matter of five literal minutes?

CHRIS: Don’t worry, uncle Ian, we’ll be fine… And Virgil is in autopilot too, so don’t worry about him either…

IAN: Okay, if you say so. But remember I’ll be there for anything you guys need, okay?

CHRIS: Thank you so much, Ian… Okay, you came for the autopilot, and autopilot you will get. Let’s hope everything goes right. Ready, father?

ROMAN: Ready.

CHRIS: Entering autopilot… now.

[end card]

[Talyn is about to wake Joan and Thomas up from their hypnosis, after Logan guided them on the synchronization like the last time]

TALYN: Three… two… one… Wake up!

[Talyn claps their hands and both Thomas and Joan wake up]

JOAN: Well? Do you think it worked?

THOMAS: There is only one way to find out… Logan, come here, please!

LOGAN: I’m already here, Thomas. Perhaps it didn’t…

THOMAS: No, it did, somehow, Logan, I can hear you! But I can’t see you… wait, what’s that…?

[Logan’s image starts appearing blurry in his spot, after a couple of seconds, he becomes completely sharp]

THOMAS: [happy] Now I can see you! It worked! I’m so happy to see you again, Logan!

LOGAN: [smiles] And I’m happy to know it worked, Thomas.

THOMAS: I got so scared for a second it wouldn’t have worked and everything today had been useless… It’s so good to see that now everything’s back to normal again, at least what I consider normal in my life. I know any other people would consider your absence as regaining normality, but… I don’t know if I would have coped to give up your company, guys, after having you in my life since forever.

LOGAN: Hearing those words feels… adequate, Thomas.

THOMAS: How is everybody doing? No, don’t tell me, I’ll call everyone so that they tell me themselves. Roman, Patton, Virgil, Janus, Remus, Chris, Ian! Everybody come here!

[all the Sides rise up except Virgil. Janus is already wearing his usual outfit and snake makeup, including a brand new bowler hat]

JANUS: Hi, Thomas. I’m not happy at all to see you. Just kidding.

THOMAS: Hi, Janus. Joan told me what you’ve been going through. Glad that you’re okay now.

JANUS: Thank you, Thomas. And look, Remus gifted me a brand new bowler hat.

REMUS: Of course I did, you couldn’t go around wearing that crushed bowler hat, could you? That’s more my thing, you know?

ROMAN: [with a smile] Hi, Thomas. I’m sorry for all the fuzz I’ve caused to you.

THOMAS: It… it wasn’t your fault, Roman. In fact, among all of us, you’re the one who has suffered the most from all of this, so it’s me who should apologize to you. You were the worst victim of this illness, which now I’ve got under control. Doctors said that if I keep my treatment and healthy habits, I’ll have a perfectly normal life. And if I’m healthy in the hopes and dreams department, so will you.

ROMAN: I’m happy for you, Thomas. Maybe it’s a little late for me, but I’m happy for you.

THOMAS: What do you mean? By the way, where is Virgil? He’s the only one who didn’t show up.

[Roman’s smile starts trembling. Soon he can no longer fight the tears and his act drops down completely. He turns around quickly and the others except Chris and Ian look at him in shock. Chris and Ian look at him in sadness]

THOMAS: Roman, what’s wrong?

CHRIS: Well, I guess you all would have found out sooner or later. You see… my parents are separating, at least for the time being. Virgil has returned to his own room and currently is in autopilot, as he doesn’t want to see anybody.

THOMAS: But what happened? I hope it’s not because of me.

CHRIS: No, don’t worry, it’s not your fault. It’s complicated, Thomas. For now, at least, it’s not definitive. Virgil hasn’t asked for the divorce yet, so technically they’re still married. It’s just that Virgil needs time to think alone, that’s all… Father, what’s the matter?

[They all look at Roman and they see him retching, still facing the wall. He quickly summons a huge bucket and vomits inside. Then he summons the bucket away and turns around, showing a sick face]

ROMAN: Ugh… I’m sorry, guys… I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Perhaps it’s residual effects of the illness, or maybe it’s the stress of my breakup with Virgil…

CHRIS: Father, you still haven’t really broken up. There may be a chance for you to fix things up. Dad still loves you, he admitted it. Your bond surely can’t be broken up so easily.

PATTON: I’ll have to talk to my son. Maybe I can help him on this.

ROMAN: If you could help him, Patton, I’d be very grateful.

PATTON: I’ll do my best, Roman. But if he decides to carry on with the break up, you know as his father, I’ll have to support him. I hope you understand.

ROMAN: I understand, Patton. As long as I don’t lose your friendship, I couldn’t bear it happening too…

PATTON: Of course you won’t, Roman! You will always be my friend, no matter what, and you’ll still be my son-in-law, even if not “legally”.

ROMAN: That means a lot to me, Patton, thank you.

PATTON: And now that I’m here with you, Chris, let me see that leg of yours.

CHRIS: What? My leg? Why?

JANUS: [smirks] Just wait and see, Chris. Let Patton work his new magic.

CHRIS: [confused] Okay…

[Patton touches Chris’ leg. A light blue glow appears around the leg and Chris looks at it, stunned, just as stunned as the others watching except the ones who were in Janus’ room earlier. A few seconds later, the glow disappears]

PATTON: Done. How do you feel now?

CHRIS: About what? Wait… my leg… it feels less weak and I no longer feel any pain when I rest on that foot… Why, I can stand on my foot normally! My leg is healed! Grandpa, how did you do that?

PATTON: It’s a gift from the Core, the same gift I used to heal Janus. I’m just grateful that I can use it for your benefit, kiddos.

CHRIS: [happy, summoning his crutches away] Thank you, grandpa! You’ve saved me months of recovery! I love you!

PATTON: Love ya back, grandson. I hope I can still help all of you in the future… [suddenly looking at Roman, scared] Roman! Look out!

[Suddenly, Roman seems to get dizzy. He loses balance and falls, but Chris and Patton grab him before he hits the floor]

CHRIS: Father, what gives!? This isn’t normal!

ROMAN: [shaking his head and regaining balance] I know… Suddenly my head started spinning… And I think I know what’s going on. I didn’t wanna believe it, especially after being with Virgil only one single time in the last couple of weeks, but, judging for what Virgil told me in the past that he felt, which is the same I’m feeling now, I guess it’s true…

CHRIS: What do you mean?

ROMAN: Vomiting, dizziness, this strange feeling in my tummy… Chris… I hope that you’re ready.

CHRIS: Ready? Ready… for what?

ROMAN: Have you ever imagined having a brother?

[there’s a short moment of silence]

EVERYBODY BUT ROMAN: [yelling at the same time] Whaaaaaaaaaaaat!??????

[a sign reads “To be concluded, guys, gals and non binary pals”]

[just-emotional-trash]

Why Putting Others First made me love Patton even more

And this is basically just a giant vent post so I’m putting it under a read more

He wasn’t trying to hurt Thomas. Even Janus admitted that Patton wasn’t harming him intentionally.

Patton was clearly confused and trying to open the field of discussion, even if his methods weren’t effective

I never knew that language was actually kinda manipulative? And I’m a psychology/philosophy person. It’s weird and grey.

And here’s where it gets really venty.

I’ve always identified very strongly with Patton.

I’m the good girl who does what she’s supposed to and gives her time to help others and will never turn anyone down who asks for help. And I feel guilty every time I do something for my mental health.

We’ve discussed before how a lot of Pattons morale comes from his Catholic upbringing. I’m not catholic, but I am Christian. I know where he’s coming from.

In the church, selfishness is a sin. It’s why so many people don’t understand what a mental health day is, because in conservative circles, it’s seen as a bad thing.

And the language thing. I really hooked onto that. And it hit me because.... it’s the language I use in any discussion or argument.

But I use it that way because I’ve been taught that it’s bad to have an opinion. My opinions are either wrong or don’t matter if they don’t match everyone else’s, so if I need to make a point, I always try to diffuse it. “But that’s just my opinion!” “What do you think?” I’m sorry!” So that no one calls me dumb or wrong.

And to an extent, that’s what happened to Patton. He felt burned because he was wrong. He knows that and admitted it. But he’s trying to argue his perspective without being too strict (like he was last time) He’s scared of being completely wrong.

And the giving yourself for others thing...

First of all, oof

Second of all, I’ve always known I would. In a heartbeat, I’d give my life for anyone. Even a complete stranger. Even a horrible criminal. I’m almost certain of it. But it’s not because I’m selfless.

It’s because I’m suicidal.

And insecure.

I don’t believe my life is worth more than anyone else. ‘How could I think that how arrogant do I have to be?!?’

But I would never expect anyone else to give their life for mine.

I’m not selfless. I’m depressed. And insecure. And suicidal. And anxious. I have no self worth. And that’s not okay.

But it has taken me seventeen years to learn that difference. I’m just glad Patton/Thomas was able to make that distinction before it got to my point.

It is hard to reinvent yourself. And Patton is being asked to do that. If he was an unsympathetic or evil character, he would rage and refuse. Instead he recognized his mistake and is actively trying to be better. And he will continue to. Evolving is what makes him strong.

Patton is an absolute king. He’s trying his best, and he’s not perfect, but one day he’ll be better. That’s all you can ask for.

[roseamongroses]

W.A.L: “Hold My Hand” (25)

s u m m a r y

Eden was the lowest of the low, a monster, hardly human, and was set to be executed. Roman was on trial, perpetually stuck in time until it was time to atone for his families sins.Neither cared much for staying trapped.So when a Stranger offered freedom, offered peace, offered power, it was hard to say no.Even if it put them on the wrong side of history.

v i b e s

time is irrelevent, homophobia who?, magic and beasts, demigods

w a r n i n g s

Imprisonment, Mentions of execution, Blood/ injuries,  Mentions of past Death, repression, cursing, some  dissociation

c h a r a c t e r s

Deceit(Eden) Sanders, Remy Sanders, Logan Sanders, Virgil Sanders, Patton Sanders, Roman Sanders, Emile Picani, Elliot, Kai, Lauren, Dot

Ship: Roceit

1) (2)   (3)  (4) (5)

(6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11)

(12) (13) (14) (15) (16) (17)

---

Deceit entered with the sunrise, the bed creaking as they eased in beside Roman.

Roman sighed, turning and curling into their lap, “You smell funny,” he mumbled, voice still heavy with sleep.

Deceit arm wrapped around Roman’s shoulders, careful to avoid his exposed wings, “Good morning to you too,”

“Did you get much sleep?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Deceit sighed, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

Roman opened his eyes, folding his arms to support his head, “Is there something I should be worried about?” he asked, coy.

Deceit’s lips twitched, “Don’t be nosy,” he said, not missing how Roman’s eyes narrowed, “I’m fine, just get some rest,” he added on quickly.

“I dun’wanna,” Roman pouted, all puppy dog eyes, but Deceit could hear their anxiety edging into the tone.

“Stop that,” Deceit scolded, prodding their face, “I’m fine—” another poke, “Sleep.”

Romans face twisted away from another poke, sitting up abruptly, “Okay so you’re fine,” he said, “You’re used to fine and obviously fine isn’t doing shit for you,”

Deceit met their state head-on, jaw ticking, “I’m working on it,”

“Are you?” Roman challenged, somehow managing to look smug with his disheveled clothes and adorable half-dazed look—

“Yes, I am,” Deceit gritted swallowing that mess of emotions. He was half annoyed at Roman’s persistence but he was more annoyed with the fact that he knew it didn’t make him magically be able to hate Roman. Ugh. “Even if I wasn’t, that doesn’t mean you’d be able to fix me,”

At that, something flickered in Roman’s eyes and for a brief, terrifying moment Deceit had to seriously contemplate the extent of Romans persuasion. Roman couldn’t really—

“I can’t,” Roman agreed as he tucked his legs, “I won’t.

“But…” Roman sighed, “Janus, that isn’t the first time you’ve been like… that. And I understand that you can’t just make yourself stop but, “ he paused, wringing his hands, “That doesn’t mean there aren’t ways to make it better. If you’re hurting I don’t want to add onto it just because I make I stupid mistake or can’t read you right. I’m trying to talk about it now because a lot of the times when you do shut down you can’t talk to me. - you can’t say ‘don’t do this you’re hurting me’ and it’s just… scary not knowing what to do.”

“I…” Deceits chest clenched, “What if I don’t know what to tell you,” he said, face darkening, “Sometimes I want to be touched sometimes I… need to be alone. And other times… I feel like if you do stay near me you’ll only get hurt,”

“Well it’s a start,” Roman said, “So what do you need right now?”

“Need?” Deceit scoffed, “I don’t need anything,”

Roman rolled his eyes, “Okay tough guy, “ he said, “What do you want,”

Deceit opened his mouth then he froze, promptly closing his mouth, eyebrows knitted as he thought. After a few seconds he patted the space beside him, not looking at Roman, “I’m tired,” he said, cautiously, “I don’t want to be alone right now.”

“Okay,” Roman eyed curiously, “Are you fine with cuddling or no?”

“Yes,” Deceit said, a bit too quick.

“Yes to what?” Roman teased.

“Don’t be a dick.”

Roman smiled, crawling beside Deceit and slipping back under the covers. He wrapped his arms around Deceit’s waist, face nestling in the crook of their neck as Deceit relaxed.

The bed wasn’t as luxurious as the one in at The Offerings, but it wasn’t as cramped as the one they had prior--it was just right. Everything was new, but Deceit felt it all clicking together just right, as if maybe he stumbled onto being something of substances after all. Something that was his to choose and share, as if he had something of worth and for once the world was finally letting him be.

The sun rose steadily outside, it’s patches of light warming Deceits skin as he slowly fell asleep.

---

You don’t really comprehend being in the same house with four kids until you experience it. Sure, Deceit’s dealt with the brats, but they were all teenagers and he didn’t feel the same degree of anxiety when they were being dumbasses. Hell, he didn’t even feel comfortable saying the Sanders kids were being dumbasses because they were actual children.

After Lauren, there were the triplets; Sofia, Vivian, and Marie. All adorable and strikingly resembling their mom with thicker, kinker hair and soft, dark eyes. They apparently had chaotic tendencies, with them invading Roman’s bed and dragging him out of bed a, seemingly unbothered by Deceit’s presence if not a little curious. Deceit told them apart by how many baby teeth they were missing and how clingy they were to Roman.

Roman stood at the counter fixing some food, while Marie remained attached to his waist, “Aren’t you going to wake them up?” he asked, head gesturing back to the hallway towards the brats rooms.

Deceit dumped more sugar into his coffee, “Mm, not today,” he said, idly watching as Vivian and Sofia arranged their dolls at the smaller table-- aka Sofia bossing around Vivian who looked increasingly agitated, “Apparently dickhead is taking us on a field trip later today, so I thought it’d be best to let them get some sleep,”

“Who’s dickhead?” Marie frowned.

Roman inhaled, giving Deceit a dry look, “He’s a bad man that you won’t ever have to meet,” he explained matter of fact, setting aside a plate a food, “Make sure you eat your vitamins,”

Marie’s face scrunched up for a moment before she nodded, detaching herself and grabbing the plate. After the other two girls grabbed their plates, taking them to their table, Roman turned to Deceit with a raised eyebrow, “Really?”

Deceit lifted the cup to his lips, “Am I not allowed to curse?” he mused, leaning against the counter next to Roman.

“Try to keep it to a minimum,” Roman sighed, “Especially around Tami, she’s like a sponge,” he mumbled, picking at his own bowl of fruit.

“I thought she was still nonverbal?”

“She is,” Roman popped a blueberry in his mouth, “But she learns quick. So if she does have her first words I’d never hear the end of it from Ma if it’s something vulgar,”

Deceit snorted, “Your mouth is filthier than mine,” he said.

“You like my filthy mouth,” Roman muttered.

The two looked up at the sound of footsteps softly padding into the kitchen. Mrs. Sanders looked visibly disheveled, Tami holding her hand--eyes trained on the ground. She yawned, “Mornin,” she said to no one in particular, her eyes flicking between the two, something akin to exasperation settling on her face, “Roman, dear, I thought you outgrew sneaking boys into the house,”

“I didn’t, I just got better at it,” Roman shrugged, “There’s coffee still in the pot--” he offered, his gaze flickering down to Tami, “Do you want me to make her something?”

Mrs. Sanders rubbed her eyes, before pulling out her glasses, “That be lovely, just make sure it isn’t sweet she hates it--,” she sighed, “Also I’m not your father, and you’re not the heir anymore so you don’t have to hide your boyfriend. But,” she pursed her lips, “If he stays here, you’re going to have to use protection.”

Deceit choked on his coffee and Roman cleared his throat, face straight, but Deceit could spot the vines peeking from their sleeves, “There are seven kids in this house, hon,” Mrs. Sanders continued, gravely serious as she poured a cup, “I’m not taking care of anymore,”

“Yes ma’am,” Roman said. It was only when Mrs. Sanders left the kitchen for the porch did he side-eye Deceit, “Stop that,”

“Stop what?” Deceit set his cup down in the sink, watching them curiously.

“You’re staring,” Roman said, walking to the pantry and pulling out the lone box of oatmeal, “Stop.”

At that, Deceit grinned, moving himself in Roman’s way, “I thought you liked having my attention,” he mused.

“I do,” Roman said, easily sliding past them, “Which is why you need to stop,”

“Uh-huh,” Deceit said, following close, “You’re cute when you’re embarrassed,”

“Fuck off--I’m not embarrassed,” Roman huffed, setting aside the box.

“Mhm,” Deceit said, winding his arms around Roman’s waist, pulling them close just as they turned around, “Kiss me?”

Roman’s glare faltered before slipping off altogether. He couldn’t mask his laugh, ducking his head to close the distance.

“You do realize we still have to talk about that?” Deceit murmured against their lips, “I know we’re not in any rush, but seeing as we don’t exactly have the same biology...”

Roman’s face twisted, hands resting on Deceit’s chest, “I’m fine with talking about sex it’s just… I don’t like talking about my body.”

“I know. I don’t either.” Deceit admitted.

“I…” Roman paused at that before nodding, “Later,” was all he promised.

---

Upon seeing Kai, Lauren, and Elliot successfully break into some magical zoo in less than an hour, Deceit began to consider that maybe, just maybe, he was surrounded by criminals.

All the faceless guards were taken care of, some in soundless pain, others passed out completely, so they slipped inside without issue. Once everything was secured, the Stranger strode inside leading the way with no further comment.

The moon hung in the sky. It was almost full.

All around them silver bars glinted, the cages themselves shadowed with the peering violet eyes hidden among the foliage.

Something about this place just wasn’t right, but the brats seemed to be having fun

Lauren was talking about some rare plant she spotted and Kai seemed placated by the rippling furs of creatures just out of reach. Of course, Elliot seemed uncomfortable, but they generally were whenever they went out with the Stranger.

The Stranger stopped abruptly, head craning to address the brats, “Y’all scram,” he shooed them, “This lesson is for Deceit,” he said with a smile.

That is when Deceit knew he was fucked.. But to the rest of them, it was normal and they all took the orders without comment or question, leaving Deceit with the Stranger once again.

Once they were out of sight, The Stranger’s smile slid off. He resumed his path forward, knowing that Deceit would follow.

The further Deceit walked the more the pit in his stomachs grew. Something was just wrong. He knew it and his mind scrambled trying to figure out if he did something wrong—which wasn’t helpful since he always did something wrong, but—

The Stranger stopped in front of a dark, cavern-like entrance. It was further away from all the cages, but it still held a commercial presence with cheery signs in odd languages and bright arrows pointing inside.

The Stranger propped himself against one of these signs, popping a lollipop on his mouth, “It’ll be a full moon soon,” he said to no one in particular, “You know…” he crunched the lollipop hard, spitting out the stick, “You’ve lasted longer then I expected.”

Deceit stared blandly and The Stranger sighed, “Still, you aren’t good enough,”

Only then did Deceits eyes narrowed, “I’ve been doing everything you asked,”

“Yes-Yes I know, you’re a good little dog aren’t you huh?”The Stranger said, “Still,”

“Still?” Deceit gritted. He could feel his anger sharp through the haze of worry.

“You’re getting a bit too—“The Stranger clicked his tongue, “Distracted—now don’t look like tha--t I won’t touch your little boy toy, that would be counterproductive to our cause,”

“So what do you want me to do?” Deceit managed, forcing his eyes to unslit, and ignoring the scales searing up his sides.

“Ah,” The Stranger laughed, “Now you’re asking the right questions and as a reward for not being entirely useless—” He flicked his sunglasses down and Deceit stiffened, “I’ll ask you a different question; what is our cause?”

“None of my business,” Deceit shrugged, “I am simply a tool who will benefit.”

“Very good,very simple right?” The Stranger hummed, “It’s easy for people to get scared of the bigger picture, but aren’t you just a little bit curious?”

“No,” Deceit lied.

“Good,”The Stranger flipped his glasses back up, covering his relentless gaze, “You’ll learn soon enough. Until then you need to push yourself further and I won’t tolerate any failure,” he gestured towards the cavern, “But just in case, here’s a little reminder about what you’ll be worth to the world if you do decide to fuck up,”

The Stranger didn’t follow him into the cavern, but Deceit could feel their mocking, cold gaze the entire time. Inside were fluorescent-lit exhibits, brightly colored informational posters and those arrows and—and—it was all terribly wrong.

Because behind each glass panel, were skeletons of all sizes; some with painted on whiskers others, with ancient feathers sticking from their arms, or scales carved deep into bone.

An exhibit of dead shifters, propped and polished for the public’s consumption.

As if they were nothing but monsters.