Girldad Rosekiller vs. Girldad Wolfstar: Selling Girl Scout Cookies
(Yes I'm aware the Girl Scouts are an American thing. Indulge me.)
Rosekiller:
They aren't so much "selling" the cookies, as they are threatening people to buy them in support of their daughter "Or else".
Some Dude: "Nah, sorry man, but I gotta sell my own kid's cookies."
Barty, pulling a knife out of fucking nowhere: "You'll buy the damn cookies or the only thing you'll be selling is your own severed hands."
Short, Sweet, and highly effective.
Wolfstar:
They have a whole plan. They used to just go to James first because this man will just buy every single one of those fucking cookies with no buyer's remorse, but Regulus has a firm ban on allowing any more than 3 boxes in the house at any given moment because they just had palets of the damned things sitting in their cupboard and now he gets physically ill at the very thought of anything other than thin mints.
So instead, Remus has a sale plan that he and Sirius created. It lays out the best locations, and with their encouragement, their daughter is very easily one of the best salespeople in the business.
Sounds normal right?
Wrong.
Because even a well-thought-out plan can be somewhat derailed based on Sirius's influence alone.
Let me set the scene:
[[On a sale day, Sirius and their daughter are sitting at the breakfast table before Remus wakes up. Sirius drinks some bougie iced espresso drink he made, and she has a plate of smiley-face pancakes out in front of her.]]
Sirius: "So what do you say when someone starts to walk close to the table?"
Their daughter, smiling up at him: "Hello, would you like to buy some cookies?"
Sirius, nodding: "Good. Now, what do you say when they say no?"
Their daughter: "Please sir, my mum just died of cancer."
Sirius, grinning proudly: "That's my girl."
Remus, having just walked into the kitchen, his hair a mess, and his jumper hiked up due to the hand scratching an itch on his stomach: "Please tell me that you did not teach our daughter to use Cancer as a sales tactic..."
Sirius: "Of course I did! It's brilliant!"
*She raises her hand from her seat*
Remus, with a soft sigh: "Yes, Angel?"
Her: "But I have two dads. I never knew my mom."
Sirius: "Ah, but that's the trick, Darling." *He pokes her nose.* "Sales is all about the blatant exploitation of other people's emotions in order to make a profit." *looking to Remus* "Tell me I'm wrong."
*Remus breathes out a resigned laugh and shakes his head incredulously*
Remus: "It's the fact that I genuinely can't that upsets me the most..."
Full name of 55: "Can You Really Call This A Hotel, I Didn't Receive A Mint On My Pillow Or Anything" (the poll won't let me make an option that long).
Rounding out the cookies based on Girl Scout cookies are win mints. I've obviously got thin mints. Also I, of course, am having these frozen.
Usually I'm not someone who enjoys mint chocolate. I don't find it gross, but I generally feel like the flavors don't taste like they quite go together. However, thin mints have just the right balance of mint and chocolate, and I love these cookies. They also have a good crunchiness without seeming dry. These are going right into the cookie championship.