#mizu trying to hide her concern

[zyrlovesmizu]

modern au! Mizu when you injure your leg while walking back home with her.

“Get on,” Mizu demanded harshly, but with a tone laced with worry, after inspecting your wounds.

Flustered, you wave your hands defensively, “no, no, I.. I don’t need that, I’m fine, I’ll just-“ before you could reply, she quickly shifts herself closer to you, immediately forcing you up.

“I didn’t ask,” she snickered, huffing as she shifts your weight comfortable on her back.

Your cheeks heat up as your hands naturally snake around her neck. As embarrassed as you were, deep inside was a growing feeling of comfort. You were being carried by your girlfriend, a fucking dream. You punched her playfully on the shoulder to which she tightened her hold around your thighs and chuckled, “just relax goddamnit!.”

You tried to maintain this facade of annoyance, only to fail miserably. Resting your head on her shoulder, you stifle an obvious smile, “you sweet son of a bitch…”

The streets were devoid of people, nobody to witness the situation. You sighed, relieved that nobody was here to witness how vulnerable you were but equally disappointed, having anticipated for someone to comment at how cute the two of you looked. When you guys reach home, she tended to your wounds with a smirk, “you liked that, didn’t you?”

“Shut up.”

[f3r4lfr0gg3r]

i’ve never requested hcs before so please bare with me 😭 if you could do some hurt and comfort hcs for mizu i would cry..like maybe you end up getting caught in the middle of a fight and get hurt so she ends up having to save you, i always see it where you take care of mizu after a fight but not the other way around. hopefully this makes sense!

Let Me Care for You

Mizu/Reader | Soft Angst/Fluff | GN! Reader | Romantic

Summary: Headcannons for what it'd be like for Mizu to tend your injuries for once as you've done for her time and time again..

AN: Trying out new formatting, hope you guys like the change! Btw I didn't know if you wanted to reference the many fics of reader caring for Mizu in the anon request so I'm sorry if that's not what you wanted, but I hope you still enjoy it!

- You've always been the one to tend to Mizu, worrying over her and her health despite so little she seemed to care for herself at times

- For that, she never understood...why did you care so much? Why put all of that energy into her well being? At first, Mizu was off put by such actions, finding it peculiar with how little she was treated well in her life, especially when you stayed the same after you got a good look at her eyes..

- Your kindness intrigued her, as you even extended your hand to her, you extended your hand to her and her oni ways and showed immeasurable amounts of concern in her times of need.

- Despite how she tried to push you away from first, what first seemed to her as annoying smothering came to be great comfort...

- So to see the person who brought on such..in pain and injured gave her so much fear. To think there could even be the possibility of losing you, to lose the one bit of comfort and vulnerablity she allowed in her life, made Mizu livid.

- Despite her stone cold look, she was genuinely a bit frantic, scared, and down right pissed off once she saw you were wounded, ending the fight as soon as she could with the new fury lit inside her from such emotions.

- Once all who threatened your safety were dead, Mizu hurried to inspect your injuries while lecturing you on how you should've been more careful and ran away when she told you to...showing you how she worried in her own way.

- While stitching you up she'd tell you to sit still so it wouldn't hurt so much and probably be a bit harsh but only to hide her concern. You could tell though from how her eyes gazed upon you and her soft touches that she was truly trying to make it as bearable as possible.

- After it was sure that all your wounds were bandaged up, Mizu would be a little softer and even a bit more protective than usual for the next few days. She'd instinctively hold you close in crowded areas and always ask if you're alright.

- Her skepticism of people who come near you two would probably heighten (if that is even possible)

- Even though you could recall how many times she'd complain about how you'd tend to her and force her to rest unnecessarily, Mizu would do the same. She'd even try to feed you before reassure her enough that you're fine, anything to help you heal faster.

- Overall, a Mizu that cares enough about you to care for you is one that'll tire herself worrying despite how much she tries to hide it!

Woo-hoo! One request done, hope it was good because I'm still getting the hang of this. Sorry if it's a bit short because I feel like it could've been longer but I think it's all good :)

《♡》 Written by @f3r4lfr0gg3r

[that-basic-simp]

Nobody's But Yours

Mizu X Fem!Reader CW: Trauma WC: 1.1k+

"I am nobody's wife."

Sitting in front of Mizu, the two of us were sipping tea together as the winter storm raged outside. It was a miracle she was able to find the house in this storm after being away for so long. She must have almost frozen since her entire face was very red and her entire body was trembling. Even in front of the fire now she was still shaking.

"That day is coming up again," Mizu said.

I had an inkling of what she meant by that day.

"It is," I said, sipping my tea.

"You do know what day I'm talking about, right?"

"I do, Mizu."

"The day I killed him," she breathed out.

"Mizu," I slowly lifted my head up to find her blue eyes.

"I still think about it. I-I should have just hid it. I should have just put away with that side of me and just became a housewife."

"But it was as you said," I said.

"Said what?"

"You're nobody's wife."

She slowly nodded her head, "T-There is some truth in that."

"How so?"

"Well, Mikio and I struggled to settle into married life. More so me since I was so used to fighting and spilling blood. Having a quiet life where I am not fighting day in and out just did not settle with me. I couldn't get used to it. Besides, I had a job to do. I had to get revenge on them. Those white men, I had to kill them. And being married and settled down, it got in the way of everything."

"Did you love Mikio?"

"Within time, I did. I eventually fell in love with him, but then things happened. And I felt betrayed by them all."

"I do remember you telling me that," I said.

"I haven't been able to feel love since then. It would cost me everything, but it would also hold me back. But," her eyes found mine as she lifted her head. "Then came you. Someone who I didn't think would come into my life."

I smiled, "Life surprises you, Mizu."

"I know it does. And I am grateful for the surprise that was you."

I giggled, "Come now, Mizu. I know you're just trying to win me over."

"You mean to tell me I haven't already?" she snickered, a small smirk appearing on her lips.

"No, you already have."

"What was it?"

"What was what?"

"What about me made you like me?"

"Well, there was a lot about you, Mizu, but the first and the big one were your eyes."

"My eyes?" she asked, confused.

"Yeah. I loved your eyes. How stark blue they were. Like the ocean, calm, yet dangerous at times. And sometimes they reminded me of ice if you were really angry. But when you're sad, they turn dull at times. Almost gray."

"Oh," she said.

"Afterwards, it was your voice. I don't know if it was your natural voice that eventually came out, or if it was when you lower it."

"You mean, like this?" she asked, the last part of the sentence lowering in tone, almost like a growl. It was raspy, like gravel.

I shivered visibly, causing her to smile darkly.

"Exactly like that."

She chuckled, "Seems I know how to get to you."

"And I also like the one thing your husband didn't."

"What's that?"

"How skilled you are. How you're able to wield both a sword and a spear. And how you're able to make anything into a weapon," I chuckled. "Especially when you used a chopstick against Taigen to prove a point."

A small, proud smile danced across her lips, "Yeah."

"Mizu, I-I like how strong you are. How you don't underestimate yourself, but also don't boast like Taigen. You show your strength and it mesmerizes people. It makes them look at you in awe and admiration."

"Why admire that part of me?" she asked.

"Because it's a side of you that you had to do yourself. You had to train yourself because no one else would. Because you had to hide that part of yourself and many more," I tilted my head down, staring down at my reflection in the tea.

"Mizu," I breathed out.

"Yes, Y/N?" her voice was soft and light, genuinely concerned if I was alright.

"W-What am I to you?"

She almost choked on her tea, coughing as she patted her chest, trying to clear out the blockage.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I should have let you finish your tea."

"I-It's fine," she rasped out, clearing her throat. "Y-You mean a lot to me. You, aside from Ringo, were the only person who looked past my imperfections. My impurities."

"What you call imperfections and impurities, I call uniqueness."

She nodded slightly, "You didn't call me a demon, monster, onryo, the list goes on and on. You saw me for who I was and not what I was. Y-You looked past everything. And saw me for face value."

"Well, you do that when you love someone," I said quietly.

"What?" she asked, picking her head up.

"N-Nothing. G-Go on."

"And well, you've just been really good to me. Treating me when I am wounded, genuinely concerned for my well being and all. And you always make sure I am safe when I am out and about. Making sure I have my glasses, my hat, everything I need to hide who I am."

"When this is all said and done?" I began to ask.

"You mean when I finish killing those men?"

"Yes. When you finish killing them, when you come back here, are you going to hide anymore?"

She smiled softly at me, "Why would I hide to the one I love?"

Picking my head up, there was a sparkle in her eyes as she stood up, sitting beside me. I turned and faced her as she reached down and grabbed my hands.

"I don't need to hide from you, since you already know. But when I am with you, I feel like I can let that side of myself be free. Like how I felt with Mikio, but it's actually there. I don't need to hide my feminine side as well as my masculine side. The side where I can take a life without second guessing. Everything that makes me who I am."

I smiled and removed one of my hands from hers, reaching up to cup her cheek. She reached up and removed her glasses, letting me see her beautiful eyes. Those water like orbs that looked like they could glow if they wanted to.

"B-But what you said," I spoke.

"I know what I said, but you're the only exception," she leaned towards me.

Our lips were mere inches away and I closed the gap. Pressing my soft lips against hers, she let out a soft hum as she kissed me back. Removing my other hand from hers, my arms snaked around her neck, digging into her hair. I grabbed at the string that held her hair up, letting it fall down to its natural length. It was another rare sight for me to see her hair down. But it was also another beauty about her. Pulling away, she pressed her forehead against mine.

"I am nobody's but yours," she whispered.

"I love you, Mizu."

"I love you, too."

[mizuseyebrows]

even if you become a true oni or onryō —mizu x reader

warnings: not proofread. fluff. she/her pronouns for mizu. slight angst. insecurities.

includes: sweet and compasionate reader. 'weak' and vulnerable mizu. word count: 3.6k

summary: mizu has an anxiety attack after a mishap, but you're there for her

a/n: this is a sequel to this

You didn't understand what’s wrong. Only for a few minutes the two of you were separated and when you returned to Mizu's side, a whole gloomy and cold aura covered her. You could also see in her eyes that she was trying to hide something from herself. Anything happened? Did she have to face a battle? You didn't believe it, there were no traces of blood or sweat on her. What could be going on?

Now you found yourself with your head lying on her lap, staring at her face. You were trying to figure out what was underneath Mizu's stoic mask at that moment.

"I know what you see. Cut it." It sounded almost like an order as she growled, her gaze remaining staring straight ahead, as if she were studying the forest.

"And what do I see?" You asked in a soft voice, almost speaking softly.

"A half blood, half breed. Like a demon." She rolled her eyes as she spoke, making a disgusted expression with her mouth. "Not even a human, something worse."

"Is there anything worse than being a human?" You looked at her with surprise and curiosity.

"There is, being me." She spoke, but you could tell there was a hint of bitterness in her tone of voice. Then, she made a self-deprecating gesture. "Being something less than human, something no one can understand, something no one wants."

"Why are you saying something so ugly, Mizu? Do you really believe everything you're saying?” You knitted your eyebrows together to express concern.

"Why wouldn't I?" She scoffed, waving her hand dismissively. "They all called me a demon. Do you have any idea how it felt growing up? The way I was treated? People thought I was a freak, an abomination. Even my own mother... I could never live up to their standards, because I wasn't full blooded human.” Her voice is sharp and bitter, the usual edge that makes up her personality has sharpened into more than just annoyance. "They tried to kill me for being a girl. I have to pretend to be hideous man. And on top of all that, I am half blood. People have every reason to hate me, and I'll be a fool for not hating myself as well."

» "You want to know what the worst part is?" She spat, her hands curling into fists slowly as the words were practically dragged out of her. "People like you. People who seem to be so good, yet they still can't see behind my veil. You could easily hate me, despise me. I don't deserve to be happy."

» "I don't know why you're so nice to me... You're making me feel more human than I deserve to feel. It gives me a slight glimmer of hope that maybe I'm not a monster, but deep down, I know it's all a lie. I know that people will never accept me for who I am." She looked away; her fists clenched so tightly that they'd gone pale. "I don't deserve anything nice, and I don't deserve you. It's only a matter of time before you realize what a terrible, horrible, awful person I am."

» "I'm afraid one day, you'll come to dislike me. You'll call me a freak just like everyone else has my entire life..." her voice trailed off, and she let out a deep breath. "When that day comes... When you finally look at me as the monster I am... I won't blame you. It's what I deserve... but it would still hurt. So much." Despite her words, there wasn't a sign of emotion on her face, not even the slightest hint of sadness. "Just like a monster would, I'll get over it."

» "But I don't want to." She muttered, her breath catching in her throat. The coldness in her tone had melted, the usually stony expression replaced by a sad look. "I don't want to be treated like a monster. I don't want to be hated. The tears hadn't started rolling down her cheeks yet, but she was on the verge of crying. "No matter how much I hate myself, I don't want that. Even if I'm a monster, all I've ever wanted was to be loved..."

» "And I hate myself for that." She was trembling just a little bit, and tears were threatening to fall, but hadn't yet. "Every single day, I hate myself for still wanting to be loved and cared for, for even having any sort of desire. Because that's not how—I've got to be strong; I have to be... I have to be tough; I can't have a moment of weakness..."

Listening to Mizu's verbal display had you in mental limbo. You heard every word, every growl, every broken voice. You saw every frown, every snap of teeth, every grimace. But you couldn't process all that information. Your heart broke as she continued to express and degrade herself like that. You couldn't believe everything you heard.

You didn't even notice that you were crying, your face was completely soaked. It wasn't until Mizu stopped talking that she seemed to come back to reality. What could you say to all that? Where to start?

You shook your head, to fully alert yourself and to deny what she was saying about herself. "M-Mizu, there's nothing wrong with having a m-moment of weakness."

"There is when you're a monster..." she whispered. "Monsters don't feel pain... Monsters don't get weak... they can't. A-And besides, I'm not weak." She said, her voice coming out stronger than it had in quite a while. "I'm strong, much stronger than you could ever imagine."

You nodded several times, wanting to reassure what she was saying but you were interrupted by Mizu.

"I'm not weak." She repeated softly, the words echoing in the still atmosphere of the room. "I'm not weak, I'm not." She breathed in again, the strength and confidence she usually had was returning. "You think I'm some sad, pathetic creature that needs to be pities and cared for? Well, you're wrong."

"Mizu!" You got up from her lap and stood in front of her to grab her face and stop her. "Please stop destroying yourself like that. Just because you're half white doesn't mean you're any less human. You're not pathetic for having weaknesses and expecting affection. Please stop talking like that, you're hurting me."

She didn't respond, just froze when your touch was placed on her cheek. Her hands started trembling, and her breath seemed to get shakier with every passing comment you made. Still, she just stood there, barely managing to keep her expression relatively neutral as tears welled in her eyes.

She didn't say anything, there was no use in arguing with you. In her head, she called herself all those terrible things, but hearing you say she was wrong... It broke the last remaining sense of confidence and determination she had to keep herself upright, and she started sobbing.

"I'm so tired." Her quiet, shaky voice sounded on the verge of breaking as she choked back some more sobs. Her eyes were red as tears escaped and trickled down her face.

The cold, stony girl who always seemed confident and in control was now standing there, broken and defenseless. Her defenses cracked and fell, shattering to pieces as the emotional wall that she hid behind gave way to the flood of sadness that rushed in.

"I can't do this... I can't." She whispered, her voice starting to crack with the volume of her crying. "All I've ever wanted was to be loved... But no one would ever love me... If they...” She sniffled, trying her hardest not to cry again. "I'm tired of... being seen as some kind of freak... being thought of as a monster. I know no one would love me... I know that all too well."

When she looked up at you, the cold, sharp glint was gone. Replaced with a sad, pleading look that spoke of only one thing. "Just once... I want to be loved. Once... is that too much to ask for...?"

"I can love you, if you allow me. I want to be there for you in every moment. I want to hug you when you feel overwhelmed, I want to kiss your eyes, your lips, your tears... I know that you have been hurt all your life but, please let me show you that you deserve everything you want and expect."

She was so utterly stunned that she couldn't say a single thing... her mouth slightly agape, her eyes wide with disbelief as she processed your words. When she realized that you had been genuine... she broke down again.

The tears fell, and this time, she didn't do anything to stop them. She wrapped her arms around you, burying her head into your chest. "Please..." she asked quietly. "Love me... please show that you still love me even though I'm a monster..."

"You are not a monster, Mizu. You are not a demon or a freak or an abomination. You are an amazing person; you are an incredible woman. Let me help you change your perception of yourself." You stroked her hair lovingly and planted a kiss on the top of her head.

"B-But...” she mumbled, clinging to your torso. "Everything about me screams inhuman. Everything..."

She hung onto you tightly, almost as if she was afraid that if she let go, the harsh reality set in once more, and she would be sent back to the terrible realization that she was, indeed, a monster.

"What if I'm too much for you to handle?" She asked, the same small, fearful voice she used earlier coming back. "What if my problems are too big for you to deal with? You'll grow tired of me..."

"That won't happen, I already know your stubborn, obstinate, and headstrong persona." You laughed softly and gave her a kiss on the forehead. "I'll be able to handle this, I won't leave you alone at any time."

» "I'll help the pain go away." You cupped her face and gave her a soft kiss on the lips. "You know that I heal your physical wounds, right? That I always clean them, sew them and take care of them so that they don't get infected. Well, now I will help you heal the internal wounds, those that no one sees but that are the ones that hurt the most. But I will need you to let me do it, I won't be able to do it alone, we both have to work together, okay?"

"S-So you're going to help cure my internal wounds too?" She asked softly as tears threatened to come again. "And you swear you won't ever leave me... and you won't ever leave me and hate me... like everybody else?"

"How could I hate you if you have such a pretty face... What you hate the most about yourself is what I love the most. Your eyes are beautiful, Mizu." You leaned down to kiss her lips again, lovingly and a little slowly.

She was so taken off guard by the sudden action that she didn't react for a moment. But, by the second kiss, she was returning the gesture, her soft lips pressed against yours for a few seconds before she pulled slightly away to speak.

"You love my eyes?" She asked softly, with a hint of surprise in her voice. "Why?"

"What do you mean 'why'? It makes you unique, it adds exoticism to your face. Plus, it's the color of the sea and I love the sea." You gave her another short kiss and smiled at her. "And, I could swear your eyes shine. There's something about them that just makes them glow."

"People think that my eyes are demonic... a sign of my mixed heritage..." She murmured, a frown forming on her lips as she mentioned that word.

"No, don't think that your eyes are demonic. They are beautiful, they look like crystalline snowflakes." You kissed her lovingly again, taking a little longer and caressing her cheeks.

You could have stayed like that all day, letting your kiss never end... The feeling of her lips was like a drug, one you could get addicted to so easily...

Finally, after a few seconds, she pulled her face away from yours. She murmured your name softly, a blush slowly spreading across her face.

"Tell me..." You whispered against her lips and rubbed your nose with hers.

"Can we... do it again?" She asked softly. "That kiss..." Her eyes glanced to the side; her cheeks tinted with embarrassment as she struggled to find the right words. "Could we... please... do it again?"

"Of course we can." You nodded gently and gave her another slow, loving kiss, wanting you both to savor the moment.

She sighed softly and took in the feeling, the sensation of your lips pressed against hers. She could feel everything, the tenderness and love that was hidden behind the kiss, she could feel it all. This was everything she had always wanted but never had... Everything she had been denied by the world and fate... Every affection she felt like she so desperately needed. This was what she wanted. All she had ever wanted. To be loved.

After a few moments, you broke the kiss and looked into her eyes with a smile. You caressed her cheeks in circles and sighed softly. "You'll let me love you, right?"

She nodded, her cheeks flushing again. "Yes, I... I would love that, actually..." She murmured. She could practically feel her heart beating out of her chest, but as she looked into your loving eyes, she felt a little bit better. "Why... do you love me...? Why do you want me...? Do you not think I'm too dangerous? Too violent? Too much of a monster?" She muttered softly, her voice coming out hushed.

"Shh... None of that. You are very dangerous and violent but...I have to admit that that attracts me. You have a lot of passion inside you, but you are directing it towards your revenge and that is what makes you dangerous. Although, your passion is what attracts me the most."

She was stunned. Hearing those words, how her worst traits were what attracted you to her... made her feel odd. To know that her rage and hatred were somehow endearing and appealing to someone... it felt like she had been seeing a distorted reflection of herself all this time and finally saw the true her.

"Those... These are not good traits..." she murmured, then let out another small laugh. "I-Is that really what attracts you to me?"

"It makes you... an adventure, there is a lot of adrenaline. I know they are not good traits but that's who you are and I must accept you, although I will help you guide your passion to better goals. I promise."

"Thank you... I have to admit, I never thought anyone would ever find those traits of mine appealing." She murmured, a soft smile forming on her lips as her eyes started getting teary again. It was almost funny; how much she had hated herself for these very traits you were now praising and considering attractive.

"Maybe I'm the freak one." You laughed happily and stole another kiss from her. "Maybe I'm a little insane, but I love seeing you being dangerous—"

She leaned into the kiss almost immediately, eager to stop you from saying too much more. She knew exactly what you had meant, but there were just some things that she wasn't ready to acknowledge yet. She had thought that she would never find someone who would love her despite all her flaws, and here you were, finding even her most deplorable traits appealing.

"You love... that about me... don't you?" She murmured, just for a quick confirmation before she threw herself back into the kiss.

"I love almost everything about you." You responded to her between kisses, each time doing it with more intensity.

"H-Almost?" She asked meekly, but once again, her question was interrupted by a kiss. She was practically swimming in the sea of bliss that those tender lips were giving her, not even thinking or considering what she said as her mind got flooded with love and passion.

"There are still things I need to know about you, so I can't say I love everything about you." You whispered against her lips, tightening your grip on her face.

"Oh..." She muttered, her lips parting slightly as she took in a breath. "Will you still love me when you know every last little thing about me?" She murmured softly, her expression tinged with worry and a hint of hesitation.

"I will still love you even if you become a true oni or onryō." You sighed softly and looked into her eyes. "I'll be the mortal of those legends who tries to change the demon or the mortal that fell in love with the demon despite its nature."

The words you had just spoken made her feel warm inside. She had never expected such reassurance, such assurance from anyone. She was speechless, not knowing how to reply to your words otherwise. In the end, she let herself go back into another long, passionate kiss instead.

And you kissed her back with the same passion and clinged a little to her, caressing her scalp lovingly. But then you felt Mizu hug your neck longingly, which made you have to lower your hands to her lower back to bring her closer to you.

However, Mizu broke away from the kiss suddenly and looked away. You could see her doubt in her eyes, the uncertainty she felt at your words. You lovingly caressed her back and gave her a kiss on the cheek to get her attention.

"We'll take this slow, okay? I know that right now everything I told you won't erase what has tormented you your whole life, but we'll go slow, okay? At your own pace, if you feel like it's too much at some point, you can say so. If you want to do something different, we can do it. Is that okay?"

"I-It's okay..." she mumbled softly, her mind still trying to process everything you had said. "I just... I just don't know where to start..." She murmured, as tears started running down her cheeks again.

"Me neither, but let's let this flow, okay? Let's not rush anything, we'll just let everything go at the pace it should go." You caressed her cheeks and wiped away her tears.

"Thank you..." she whispered softly, her breathing starting to slow down again. She had never taken things slowly before, she had always been impulsive, always rushed to the next part without taking a moment to stop and think. "But... it's kind of hard to take it slow when you kiss me and do things like that so passionately..." She mumbled, her face getting red again.

"That's my mistake. If you want, I can stop doing it to go slower." You laughed softly, blushing too.

"Can we... keep on doing it... but just a little slower... a little less... intense..." She murmured softly, her eyelids slowly closing as she tried to think of the right words.

"We can do that. I like to kiss you slow and loving." You nodded several times, still smiling.

"Can we... um..." she muttered, not knowing how to ask for what she wanted. "Can we just... sit in silence for a while... while you hold me close and... just stroke my hair and stuff...?" She murmured, her face getting even more red when she realized just how needy and clingy she sounded.

You felt something inside you explode and stir at how cute Mizu had sounded. You couldn't help but bite your lower lip in excitement and nodded several times. "Of course, of course, of course." You sat behind her and made her lean against your chest to stroke her hair the way she wanted.

She gasped softly as she felt your arms wrap around her and pull her back against your chest. For a few moments, all she could do was enjoy the feeling of your gentle touch and the calm, steady rhythm of your heartbeat. She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, relaxing as she felt your fingers move through her hair, as if she was some small, helpless animal being comforted by their parent.

The feeling was incredible and she savored every moment of it, letting out a soft, contented sigh as you kept stroking her hair.

"Thank you..." she murmured, her body leaning even further into you as she breathed a little slower. She felt so safe in your arms, so warm.

"You have nothing to thank." You whispered to her and kissed her temple, tightening your arms around her.

The kiss on her temple caught her by surprise and she gave a soft gasp, her eyes widening slightly, but she didn't care and simply leaned back against you even more. The sensation of your arms around her was indescribably comforting, something she didn't think she would ever experience but now all she wanted was to stay like that forever, to stay sheltered and protected and loved.

She let out a soft whimper, your kiss once again sending a shiver down her spine as she felt your tight embrace. She pressed herself even further against you, almost as if she wanted to bury herself in your arms, to melt into your embrace and become part of you. She didn't want to let go of your embrace, not yet, not any time soon, not until she had completely accepted the warmth and the affection that you were now showing her.

[tvrningout-archived]

mizu headcanons bc it’s about time!!

so along with having poor vision, mizu suffers from a sensitivity to light; you’ll catch her squinting hard even if it’s not all that sunny outside, and she’ll often wear one of those hats you see farmers wearing all the time. it’s the best she can do to protect her eyes from the sun

tbh if she has to fight in broad daylight, it’s almost better to just close her eyes bc between the sun and her poor vision, she's gonna have a tough time. she’ll end up with a big ol’ headache that makes it harder to concentrate on her other senses

eventually she does start training herself to fight with her eyes closed! just seems logical bc what if she eventually goes blind? 

going blind is a genuine concern for mizu, tho you won’t catch her talking about it unless you ask -- she’d rather not bring up something unpleasant and personal without being prompted to. 

in general!! mizu will not talk about her own worries or feelings. she’s prone to hiding them for the comfort of others, but if asked outright, she’ll be pretty honest! she’s just very aware that everyone is dealing with something or has something on their mind, so she doesn’t like to add to that. it isn’t as tho she needs to talk about herself that much, right?

yu wonders sometimes where she got her people skills from, bc it definitely wasn’t him!! except actually it was his careful, caring treatment of her that provided a blueprint, and books that provided examples of do’s and do not’s!

mizu considers herself well-rounded and competent as a slayer, but she wouldn’t call herself talented; she just works hard and tries to pay attention to her surroundings!

but her adaptability and quick-thinking are what set mizu apart from others! whereas hyouka might try the same thing ten times, mizu will immediately change her tactics and come up with a new plan

as mentioned here, there are spirits and creatures that aid yu in maintaining the order of his river and the surrounding area, and these guys recognize mizu sometimes and will reveal themselves to her! just to say hi or to give updates that she can relay to yu

is she grateful that the corps helped her get glasses so she could actually see?? yes, but also... she kinda hates them bc they give her headaches and fall off all the time. if mizu is sighing to herself, 9/10 times it’s bc of her glasses these days :’ )

[mamabearcat]

58 for Inukag?

Apologies Nonny for the length of time this took!

58, “You smell like a wet dog.”

The wave rushed over her head. A moment ago they’d been laughing, splashing each other in the shallows, and she’d run into the ocean, swimming out a short way to avoid her little brother’s teasing. Kagome was a fair swimmer, but not brilliant, and she’d never been in water this deep before, and never the ocean.

She hadn’t noticed at first, busy gazing in wonder at the view of the sleepy little seaside town up on the cliff above the beach, enjoying the sound of the sea and the smell of the salt, the warmth of the early Summer sunshine after the cold weather they’d left behind in Tokyo. And then she suddenly noticed how far away the beach was, and that her feet could no longer touch the sand – somehow, she was being swept out to sea. She tried not to think of how panicked Mama, Grandpa and Souta would be if they noticed she was in trouble. None of them were great swimmers either.

She fought against the current in panic, trying to breaststroke back to shore, but it felt like she wasn’t getting anywhere; the pale yellow sand of the beach with their striped umbrella to protect against the sun was looking further and further away, and she was getting exhausted. A wave knocked her sideways and her head went under. She kicked back to the surface with a gasp. There was no way she was going to be responsible for ruining their family holiday she thought determinedly. Coming to Australia had always been a dream of hers, to see a country so huge, so beautiful – and it was their first family holiday since Papa had died. She kept her eyes firmly on the shore, trying to focus on swimming towards her family, barely able to see them any more in among the families enjoying the beach and the waves that rose and fell to hide the shoreline from her.

Another wave went over her head, and she swallowed saltwater. She was beginning to get tired, barely able to kick her legs anymore. She tried to tread water, but the waves were pushing her around, and more saltwater rushed into her nose and mouth as she tried to call out for help. She could feel herself going under. She splashed her hands upwards trying to keep her head above water, trying to kick her legs. She felt so heavy. Her lungs were burning, and she closed her eyes in despair. She wasn’t going to make it.

A warm hand grabbed hers, and she felt herself being lifted out of the water as her chest came in contact with something hard and floating. She dropped her head down onto the smooth surface – it smelt oddly of coconuts and wax. A surfboard. She coughed and spluttered, unable to speak. Hands grabbed her legs, swinging them onto the board as she continued to cough, laying face down on the surfboard. A warm hand pushed her head gently to the side, stroking her forehead soothingly.  The voice behind her was deep and masculine, speaking English, but she was too shaken to try and translate the words in her head at the moment. Finally she heard something she could understand.

“Nihonjindesu ka?”

“Hai”, she managed.

The stroking on her forehead continued. The hand was warm. “Daijobu uke aimasu”, the voice said. She repeated the words in her head as she spluttered, her lungs burning. ‘Everything is going to be okay. He promised. Everything is going to be okay’. 

The board was rocking gently underneath her, she could hear splashing sounds, and feel the warmth of her rescuer’s body and the smooth rubbery texture of a wetsuit against her bare back as he leaned forward, his arms cutting through the water in swooping motions, paddling them back to shore.

“Sorry”, she coughed, trying to turn to look at her rescuer. “Sorry for being a bother.”

“Hey, take it easy.” A gentle hand pressed against her shoulder, and she lay back down. “I’m glad you can speak English – I only remember a little Japanese. I’ll get you back to the beach soon – we’ve just gotta paddle parallel to the shoreline to get past this rip. Hold on to the board with your hands if you can.”

As soon as the board skimmed across the sand she was picked up and easily carried in strong arms.

“Looks like you’ve got a few people here that are worried about you”, he said.

“Kagome!”

Her mother’s voice was shrill and worried. She tried to smile and stop coughing as she spotted Mama and Souta sprinting towards her across the sand, with Grandpa walking quickly behind them, but she was finding it difficult to draw in a deep breath, and soon began coughing again, unable to reply to her mother’s frantic questions in Japanese.

“I think we should get you to a hospital. It sounds like you’ve aspirated some saltwater, and that can be dangerous”, the voice behind her muttered. She tipped her head back and was momentarily mesmerised by the amber eyes looking down at her. She blinked, taking in the dark tan skin, choppy white hair darkened to grey by the water, and finally, a twitching pair of pointed ears.

“Youkai”, she whispered. He grinned down at her, a sharp white fang poking over his lip.

“Haven’t heard that word in a while. I’m hāfu – Dad was an inuyoukai, Mama was human.” His eyes flickered over her in concern when she began coughing again. “Right, we need to get you checked out. I’m gonna call an ambulance.”

He laid Kagome down on the beach towel indicated by her mother, who immediately sat beside her to hold her hand, brushing the dark wet fringe off her daughter’s face. They watched as the youkai jogged slightly up the beach where there was a towel and bag, then returned quickly, digging out his phone and talking on it urgently. Mama and Grandpa fluttered around Kagome anxiously as she coughed and wheezed. Souta sprinted back down to the waves and retrieved the surfboard.

They all looked at the youkai with wide eyes as he hung up the phone. “Right”, he said, then noticed Souta holding his surfboard. “Ah, arigato kiddo.”

He scratched his head muttering, “I don’t know if I remember enough to explain this.” He took a deep breath. “Watashinonamaeha inuyashadesu. Um… Kagome”, he gestured towards Kagome, then tapped his own chest, “hai ni mizu”, then waved his hand from side to side, trying to indicate maybe. “Damn, I don’t know the word for ambulance.”

“Kyukyusha”, coughed Kagome.

“Right. Byoin e no kyukyusha. Or is it hosupitaru?”

Kagome’s mother looked at him and nodded. “Kagome may have water in her lungs and you’ve called an ambulance to take her to hospital. Is that correct?”

Inuyasha’s eyes widened, and he rubbed the back of his head. “Ha! Yeah, that’s right. Sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed… we get a lotta tourists around here that don’t speak English.”

“That’s quite alright Inuyasha-san.” She looked worriedly at Kagome, then breathed a deep sigh of relief when the sound of sirens began to get closer. “Will they let me go with her?”

“I don’t see why not. But they won’t let all of you go. If you like, I could bring…”, he trailed off as he realised he didn’t know anyone else’s name.

Kagome’s grandfather gave a slight bow. “Kenshin” he said, then indicated Kagome’s mother, “Kaori”.

“And I’m Souta!” 

Inuyasha grinned at the young teen, then looked up at the ambulance parked up on the hill above the beach.

“I’ll be right back.”

Not long after, Kagome was safely in the back of the ambulance with Mama. Inuyasha promised to bring Grandpa and Souta along with him in his car, and they would all meet at the hospital.

The paramedic gently placed a breathing mask over Kagome’s face. “This should make things easier for you”, she smiled, turning the knob to allow airflow into the mask. “You seem to have made quite an impression on Inuyasha – I don’t think I’ve ever seen him that talkative.”

“Oh really?” replied Kagome’s mother in surprise, as she held on to Kagome’s hand, rubbing her arm in a comforting manner. “We found him to be very polite and kind.”

“Yeah, he’s known around here as a bit of a grump. We always joke that he became a veterinarian rather than a people doctor because his bedside manner was so poor.”

Kagome suddenly laughed, then had a coughing fit. “A dog youkai”, she wheezed, “who looks after dogs.” The paramedic smiled.

“Yeah, but don’t say that to him – I think that joke got old real fast. And speaking of dogs”, she leaned towards Kagome and sniffed, then sighed. “Now my ambulance smells of wet dog.”

[mizukixtsukiyomi]

Let’s end the year strong Mizu! Restarting our art-scenarios heheheh

[ @fenrae-l�� decided to send me a few sketches to bring back the art-scenarios we use to work on (she draws; I write). Under the cut is where you will find the scenario! Thank you again, Fen!! ]

Crossover: Donten ni Warau x Inuyasha

Pairing: Tenka Kumo x Kagome Higurashi

Twisting the cloth in her hands, water sprouted and into the bowl beneath. Fire flickered and popped in the middle of the small home. The night’s cricketing hum serving to calm the anxiety that was to come tomorrow morning. 

If there was to be a morning. 

“You haven’t told them.” 

The female voice sprung Tenka’s attention away from the dancing flames and to the female preparing his medication. His features softened as he caught her concern overtaking. “Don’t know how,” he sighed, “even if I wanted to, Kagome.” 

The priestess’s shoulders dropped. “Tenka-san, this has gone beyond caring how to tell them!” She turned her body to face his left, squeezing the cloth close to her chest. “Your brothers deserve to know about your curse!” It pained her to know he was set on dying. Set to let fate pull him as it wanted. Humans had free will. Even if it meant going against the gods’ plans. When Tenka had first visited her, he did come with the hope her priestess powers could purify the curse away or even null it for a time being. But when she had discovered he had made his body to hold an artificial fraction of the Orochi curse, she understood. And he confessed. 

“I don’t want them to be mixed in this mess.” Tenka sighed, raising the covers of his kimono to hide the purple curse beginning to spread on his neck. “They deserve a peaceful life.” 

Her face winced from the mental pain. “They won’t be at peace with you gone, Tenka-san.” 

Tenka turned his head, giving Kagome a smile. “It’s selfish of me to ask, but I do think they deserve someone like you in their lives. They deserve some light.” 

She shook her head in return. He was set to take the fault. Over the course of knowing each other and seeing each other in secret every other night, she had come to learn the middle child of the Kumo family, Soramaru, was the true Orochi vessel. If the public were to find out, immediate execution was to follow. 

So she understood Tenka’s motives. Understood his plans. 

Her view dropped to her lap, cloth being held between her hands. “It’s not fair…”. She whispered, voice beginning to crack as she held her tears in. “No one needs to die.” 

Tenka’s smile softened; his hand reached to cup the side of her face. Watching Kagome’s eyes close at his touch, he could not help but feel his heart flutter at the sight of her leaning closer to his hand. “Life can be a blessing and a curse.” And it was becoming darker everyday for him. Difficult to move on with his plans. Especially after the two of them had become so close. 

After both of them had exchanged their feelings. 

After sharing countless nights together. 

It was becoming difficult to be alone and leave others in sorrow. He knew he was leaving them with a heave grieve. 

“I’m so sorry…”. 

Kagome’s eyes scrunched as she sniffed, tears beginning to drop one by one. Hearing his apology made her stomach churn with guilt. It made her feel cold yet so warm. “There is still time…”. 

Her faint hope only provided a glimmer of joy to show on his smile. He gently tilted her head back, signaling her to open her eyes and look into his. “I’m being so selfish leaving my brothers to you,” he leaned closer, “but I know you are the one they need when this all ends. I can only entrust you with them.” 

Her heart throbbed as she saw his gaze trying to comfort her. Her hand slowly rose; fingers flexed beside his head before coming to cup his right cheek. Fingers slowly glided to the back of his ear before running through his hair. Her hips lifted off her calves as she balanced herself to be eye-to-eye. “You’re being so cruel, Tenka-san.” 

Tenka snickered softly, “I apologize again.” 

Her eyes tightened to a mild glare. “Apologies don’t always work; you aren’t always going to be forgive with simple words.” 

A laugh rumbled through his chest. “You’re right…”. 

She leaned in, softly pressing her lips to his. Tenka responded without letting another second pass. His hand on her cheek only bringing her closer. There was still time, lots of it, but sometimes fate had other plans for every passing minute. The time he was allowed to be with her, he was grateful for it. For he craved her entire being. It ached to think never being able to see her again. 

Tomorrow was feared; presently is what he would want for an eternity. 

[jambenoirdragonbleu]

Black + Blue Pt. III

Pt. I | Pt. II | Pt. III | Pt. IV | Pt. V | Pt. VI | Pt. VII

Warnings: Signs of PTSD

Word Count: 1,387

OC’s: Mizu Florence

Lavender iris’ fixated on his sharp moonstone gaze.

The chef’s expression never changing despite his growing frustrations.

Virtually in awe of her unexpected visitor, the loose fabric of her kimono began to slide down from her body…her freckle dusted breasts nearly forcing their way beyond their silk seams.

“Well...”, Sanji finally softly spoke as he lifted a new cigarette to his mouth, igniting it with the subtle flame of his lighter.

Haven’t being this close to him in two years, her skin flushed at the sight. His defined muscles flex at his movements as he took his first drag.

“…you’ve had a really bad day, huh?”

Unbelievably it was the first time she had really seen…what really lied underneath that suit and tie.

His bare arms…his chest mostly left to view under such tight black fabric.

“Well, if you would’ve asked…”.

His hands returning to his pockets.

“…I would’ve showed up sooner”.

The soothing rustic charm of his voice ringing through her ears.

The light chill of the night probing her to frantically cover her torso.

“W-Wha…what’re you doin’ up so la…how’dyou get up here?”

“I walked”.

“You walked…”, her eyebrows lightly narrowed toward him.

“Well, sort of…”, the man shifted his gaze toward the edge of the balcony, taking another drag from his cigarette.

“Oh, well, when ya put it that way…”, the woman sarcastically retorted. 

Retracting her lance, the woman retreated to the plush luxury of her quarters. 

“Come on, then”, she softly called out to him, “before ya catch somethin’ out there”.

The chainsmoker pirate in tow. The stained glass door gently shut behind him.

The tumbling gears engaging the lock.

The shimmery vibrant designs upon thin silk of her kimono gleamed against the chandelier. Strangely matching against her long flowing turquoise locks.

Her sweet lavender scent now delightfully overwhelming his senses.

Her movements so lively…her delicate features emphasized at her most base form.

“So”, she finally spoke up forcing him to pull himself from his spellbound state. Setting her lance back in its original placement. 

“I reckon ya got a good reason for scarin’ me into nearly knockin’ your head clean off back to the East Blue”.

A subtly playful smirk upon her lips, her arms folded underneath her breasts.

A soft chuckle lifting from the man’s throat.

“Sorry”, the man replied. Smoke still floating to the ceiling. “I guess I should’ve expected as much”.

“Besides, don’t you have company at the moment?”, the woman reminded him with a hinting grin. “It’s not like you to hold out on’a pretty lady”.

“Dunno”, he shrugged to himself, his expression returning to its previous state. “As far as I know, my rooms empty and locked”.

The woman’s brows raised, perplexed by his response.

“You…didn’t like any of them?”

“Actually, the opposite”, the man prepared his response with another drag of his cigarette. His passionate essence morphing the smoke into his vision of their silhouette.

“They were beautiful”, he confirmed.

Mizu’s features flooding in delicate sorrow. Although still clearly caught in her uncertainty.

“Each with a kind, soothing, and nurturing heart”.

“Well, of course”, Mizu’s voice softening in light solemn. “I know how you like your women”.

“Well…”, the man took a final drag from his cigarette before discarding it. “You’re only half right”.

“That so?” 

Readjusting her kimono as it continued to slip further down her breasts, Mizu’s intrigue heightened. 

“How’dya figure?”

“You know me well enough by now…to know that there is so much for me to love about any woman”.

Sanji’s hands firm in his pockets.

“Hell, you know so much…it was impossible for them to disappoint”.

A light smirk upon his face as he began to approach her.

“The flaws are of a woman are just mere cracks that can easily be mended by the proper love and care…and I have taken an oath to do so without a scrap of hesitation”.

Mizu lightly trembled at the sudden abundance of heat that enveloped the room.

“I am a man…that was born to love the most beautiful women in all the world”.

He firmly stated as he stood before Mizu. Her pearl flesh shifting to a pale pink. Her breath hinged.

“But…”, his tone softened. His slate gaze forwarded to meet hers, filled with anxious desire.

“I only ever craved the love of one”.

Mizu’s lips parted just barely as she tried to find her voice beyond her rising heat. Tearing her eyes away in a desperate ploy to hide.

Clutching onto the seams of her kimono, overwhelmed by the pounding in her chest. Forgetting how to breathe.

“…And…what makes you think this one…is capable of that?” Her question following a soft gulp.

“Because she told me”, the man quickly and firmly answered. Anticipating the woman’s potential to lie.

“…Sanji-“.

“She told me when she screamed it to the masses of an entire empire…that long thought she was dead”.

“That was…I-“.

“When she threatened to kill her own family if they even lifted a finger toward me”.

His voice rose slightly.

“I was trying to protect you-“.

“When she risked her own skin to save my ass!”, he nearly shouts as he lifts her arm in between them.

The sleeve of her kimono sliding down to reveal the bandaged aftermath of her stopping her father’s axe from colliding with the chef’s skull.

Yanking her arm away in sorrowful rage.

“Well, what in the hell was I supposed to do?! I didn’t have a choice or they were going to-!!”

“Kill me!!”, Sanji finished her sentence for her. “You could’ve chosen that, but you didn’t”.

Mizu’s glare was compromised with potential tears.

“…I…I didn’t want someone else to die because of me!!”

“But I would FOR you!! You know that!! So why do you choose to lie to me even now?!”

“BECAUSE YOU SHOULDN’T!!!”

Sanji was taken aback.

However, not by her tone.

Her soft lavender gaze…now split in half by her pupils resembling that of a snake.

Seeing her reflection in his stare, she quickly turned away from him. The pain of her power surging…the shame causing her body to tremble.

“Mizu…”, Sanji reached out toward her in heavy concern. 

“Just give it a rest, willya?! You shouldn’t have even…been dragged into this in the first place”, Mizu replied. The weight on her shoulders heavy with grief.

“You had nothing to do with this…and now…”, her voice quivered as her pain grew.

A sharp gasp escaped her lungs as the man’s arms wrapped firmly around her body, her breasts settled in between them.

“Mizu…”, Sanji’s voice softened against her ear. “…just tell me...do you really love me…?

Mizu’s breath hinged as she pushed back her sobs. His touch soothing her to relax.

“…yes”.

“Then why are you trying to push me away…?”

“Because you shouldn’t…you shouldn’t love me…I…I could destroy everything…everyone…and…I still can’t even control all of it…and I can’t escape it”.

She lightly sobbed as she reached behind her, hands trembling as they grazed the soreness of her battered birthmark. Sanji’s heart sinking remembering her abuse. Imagining her pain killed him. “…this bloody hunk of scales proves it… I’m…I’m just a monster!”

Sanji’s grip tightened against her body. His heartbeat firm against her back…the warmth soothing her pain.

“You listen to me”, the pirate chef spoke against gritted teeth, “…you are NOT a monster”.

Her fists clenched against her chest beneath his arms.

“I didn’t fall in love with a monster. The ocean is a vast mysterious world…that many people only fear because they underestimate what lies in your heart. You are the very thing that guides fools like me to their hopeless dreams…but mine is the heart of all oceans…”.

“…but…I can’t feel it…”, Mizu’s sobbed lightly. “…I can’t feel the All Blue so…how am I supposed to help you with your dre-“.

“OUR dream”, Sanji abruptly halted her words, his voice soft, rich with love. “And it’s alright…one day you will...and we’ll find it together”.

With subtle kiss to her shoulder, Sanji began to gently pull the kimono down, exposing just a few scars upon her back…a light glimmer of her scales.

“W-Wait, Sanji…”.

A light shush quieting the fearful woman.

“Don’t worry…”, a subtle whisper against her freckle dusted shoulders giving the woman a pleasant chill. 

The scales gleaming off the chandelier.

“…I’ll take care of it”.

Tagging: @digitalkanvas​ @completelyinappropriate​ @aquathemermaidstripper​ @glacian-apocalypse​ @melodiousjp​

[biteheir]

@kirinojotei​ : CONTINUED

❛ SHE’S A TERRORIST. Akatsuki will come for her. ❜ Is hurled from mouth to mouth around the rocking ship deck like casted stones - like fingers pointing witch. The crew of predominantly male civilian sailors pronounces this as the superstitious seamen used to murderously murmur about maidens bringing misfortune upon their ships in ancient times. In the same deadly tones as their repulsive ancestors before forcing damsels to walk the plank to fall to their watery deaths lest their wicked femininity summon an ocean demon to sink them all. And the Mizukage, peering at the bespectacled young woman with blood for tresses and incriminating clouds emblazoned upon her adornment with her slender arms bound by chakra sealing rope to the main mast of their seafaring vessel surrounded by Kiri Shinobi with watchful eyes, Mei knows that the risk is genuine. Yet, more pressing is that much worse awaits the Uzumaki in Krigakure’s merciless T and I unit if she refuses to offer the intel the Shinobi Alliance seeks. The Raikage was brutally clear and specific about what they need from the girl. It is only expected after the Uzumaki’s comrades stole every Bijuu but two, attacked the Hokage Summit, and their leader declared war on the world.

       However, while the Godaime Mizukage can resort to ruthlessness if she so pleases and delegate the task to her interrogators and their sophisticated and draconian methods, she has learned that kindness can be a much greater weapon and tongue loosener. That incentives and rewards can encourage an enemy to turn with more ease than punishment. And motivation can be offered in many forms. This is partly why Mei is not only feared and respected by her people but loved. Good-natured Chojuro on Mei’s orders has been speaking to Karin Uzumaki softly, coaxingly like the girl is a guest rather than a prisoner. As Mei trained him to with Ao listening closeby but out of sight, analyzing her chakra to search for truthful confirmation and fabrications. And their watercraft is only passing the former Uzushiogakure’s seas towards Mizu no Kuni’s borders when Mei leaves the captain’s quarters after discussing the progress of their voyage that her keen ears catch the three telling words. Aburn lashes flutter as she gazes out at the turquoise whirlpools in the distance before advancing her way next to Chojuro, all voices hushing.

❝ You say your work saved your life. ❞ Mei begins, for this is what she has been waiting for. A hairline crack in the Uzumaki’s armor - a shred of weakness. No matter how fake it can be, it is something - and it is this statement that the Mizukage relates to on a personal level - and thus an opening to establish common ground. ❝ When my people were embroiled in the ravages of civil wars when women like you and me with gifts were hunted like vermin by the evils of fearful men, our families slaughtered…when we were starving, despairing, and in hiding like rats, and united but alone, I too, kept myself standing because my work ensured my life meant something. What is this work that helped you survive? ❞

What lead you here from the ruins of Uzushiogakure into the clutches of Akatsuki?

karin wasn’t stupid ; she had never been stupid. it’s how she rose through the ranks in otogakure so quickly. it’s how she earned the semi-trust of orochimaru. of course , the snake never really trusted her or anyone for that matter aside from kabuto but kabuto was held to a higher standard than the rest of them. kabuto was his first that he twisted to serve him. kabuto wouldn’t have betrayed orochimaru.  karin however - karin was a wild-card and she had always been. from following orochimaru due to his pure strength that rolled off of him in waves , to doing what it took to gain his trust going as far to use honorifics to fool the plebeians into making her think that she was a loyal servant of the snake master. she pulled out enzymes and taught herself anything she wanted to know. she never needed him to teach her. she was special. and that -- that was what concerned him the most. at least if she was hard-pressed to say if something unsettled him about her.  and so , when she steps on board , she cuts her eyes towards the others that speak in barely concealed whispers. red hair had always been a bad omen , considering that they worked for the devil themselves and with her own linage of demon-sealers in her blood -- she too , would probably not trust her. ( not that karin trusted easily anyways. no , only fools did that. ) it’s no matter , she knows that they aren’t trying to conceal their words. it’s in the way they side-eye her as they past.  karin may not be able to sense accurately but it doesn’t mean she doesn’t know how to read people. they don’t trust her. she wishes that she didn’t have these binds on , it’s makes her system all types of wonky. she can read the basics but it keeps her from really manifesting her ability. they keep their distance and a few , brave little men , stupid little men , try to intimidate her but she isn’t intimidated so easily. she stares back at them, a brow quirking as she doesn’t blink until they look away, uncomfortable.  she shifts in her akatsuki cloak and wonders how the rest of her team faired. if they had gotten anything , if they had killed danzo like the original goal. ( well, suigetsu and juugo had been caught. she worries about sasuke for a brief moment before she thinks of how he talked down to her. stupid little man thinking that he was better than her. they were cut from the same cloth and he had the audacity to look down on her. no matter. ) 

she doesn’t know how much time has passed , but there’s an ache when she travels past uzushiogakure. she thinks of her mother , loyal to the end , loyal to a dead fault. over-working herself just to keep a roof over their head and keep the faith of the kusa-nin. of her father with his boisterous laughter and fists twice the size of her. how he would take any mission just to be able to afford something pretty for her mother. of stories she had been told growing up and she doesn’t even recognise herself whispering the words as she stares distractly in the distance of her parents homeland.  what does stop her, brings her back to the present is when mei , the old hag that had called sasuke handsome. karin could admire the woman in another life, she was strong. she was powerful. and karin had always had something akin to respect for those -- but she had called sasuke handsome. ( no , don’t think of him. he isn’t thinking of you stupid little girl. )  she seems small in her akatsuki cloak , surrounded by nothing but enemy nin and she contemplates on telling her her story. to see if mei would understand. ( someone should understand. tell her story to future generations -- but no, karin hadn’t surivived this long to just die. ) she watches mei for a moment, crimson staring at the other, contemplating on what she should say. she has to play this a certain way.  she lets out a sigh before looking away. with that sensor around karin probably wouldn’t be able to lie that easily. “ orochimaru saved my life when i was younger. he forced me to work for him. gave me a purpose. ” made her strong, made her invincible. " he found me shortly after kusagakure's destruction. " not a lie.  

[nerdy-nonbinary]

Everything's Gonna be Alright

The TV was on, open to some news channel, and students were strewn about the room. Midoriya sat on the couch, discussing the pros and cons of highly defensive costumes with Kaminari and Kirishima. Ashido was on her phone, trying to ignore Mineta, who was pulling balls out of his head and tossing them at people around the room lazily. Jirou leaned against the coffee table and started flipping through channels, but stopped on another news channel when nothing interested her, until another report came in.

“Next up, an interview with Miss Mizu Kanada. Mizu Kanada will be the first transgender woman to play a leading role in a film by a major film company. Her quirk, Self-Hydro, allows her to manipulate the water contents of her body, making her an ideal actress for emotionally charged dramas. The film, One Small Step, is set to air on Ja-

“Agh, turn it off, will you, Jirou? I don’t wanna hear a story about some tranny.”

The room froze, and everyone slowly turned to look at Mineta. Even Todoroki couldn’t have made the room colder.

“Wh-what did you say?” Midoriya choked out the words, and Jirou could sense his anxiety rising.

“I said, I don’t wanna hear a story about some tranny,” Mineta repeated. “Those people are messed up in the head, thinking they're some gender they aren’t.”

“What the hell, dude?! You can’t go saying that about people,” Kirishima stood up defensively, and Jirou soon did too, though she remained silent. She was fuming, but her throat had closed up from rage.

“Calm down, Kirishima, I’m saying the truth,” Mineta replied, too oblivious to realize no one was taking his side. “Men like that are just trying trick guys like us, you know? Who would want to go on a date only realize that she’s actually a he?”

The room exploded, people shouting at Mineta for his idiocy. The carpet beneath Todoroki’s feet began to smolder, and Dark Shadow had grown bigger than Jirou had ever seen it in the light. The couch was slowly dissolving under Ashido’s tight grip, and Yaoyorozu was already giving a lecture on the western construct of the gender binary, with Iida right behind her, nodding and corroborating her every word. But despite the loud bombardment of criticism around her, the only person Jirou had her eyes on was Midoriya. He was curled up in the corner of the couch, arms tightly wrapped around himself, as though trying to hide inside of himself. Tears streamed silently down his face, and Jirou could tell this wasn’t the first time he’d been in this position. Jirou had an idea growing in her head from his reaction, but refused to let her guesses cloud her judgement of him, whether she was right or not. She glanced at Kirishima, who had also been watching him, and they nodded as they slowly approached him.

Jirou kneeled down to his level, and in a soft voice said “Hey, Midoriya, wanna come to my room and get away from this?”

The boy gulped and nodded, slowly unwrapping himself from his self-imposed prison. Kirishima took his hand and pulled him to his feet, shielding him from the ferocious crowd as Jirou led the way to her room.

Jirou closed the door softly behind and let out a quiet sigh, thankful to be away from the noise, though she was glad it was there as well. Despite her quirk and penchant for hard rock, she wasn’t one for noisy crowds. But she’d put up with this for hours if it meant Mineta got what was coming to him. Kirishima led Midoriya, still shaking with his arms wrapped tight around himself, to her bed as he sat beside him, and Jirou turned her chair from her desk and faced the two. Midoriya’s breaths were shuddery, and she could here him muttering to himself, trying to control his breathing. Though he was still shaking a bit, Midoriya gave them a wavering smile.

“Th-thanks a lot, g-guys. I really needed to g-get out of there.”

“It’s no problem, bro. Anything to help out a friend,” Kirishima gave him his signature shark-tooth grin, and his smile grew just a bit wider. But Jirou was still concerned. Midoriya’s breathing still hadn’t returned to normal, and his hands seemed to be grabbing at something on his chest.

“Midoriya, is we can do to help right now? Play music, find a teacher…”

“Actually, could you get me something to drink?”

“Yeah, sure,” Jirou hopped to her feet and went to her mini fridge. “Any requests?”

“No, anything is fine,” He gave her a smile, but she knew there was something else he wanted to say. She grabbed a seltzer and handed it to him, but he didn’t open it right away. Instead, he stared at his hands, going numb from the cold can. “Actually, guys, there’s something I wanna tell you.”

Midoriya took a deep breath, and said, “I’m… trans. I’m a trans guy.”

Kirishima grabbed his shoulder, surprising Midoriya. “Thanks for telling us, man. I’m glad you trust us.”

Jirou sent him her warmest smile, one she saved for moments like these. “Same here. And know we’ve always got your back.”

Midoriya stared in wide-eyed astonishment, as if he wasn’t expecting such calm understanding and support. Then began to cry. “Thank you guys so much! I was so scared to come out to the class, I was worried Kacchan would out me before I was ready or no one would support me or they’d make me stay in a girl’s dorm or I’d ha-”

“Woah, calm down there, buddy,” Kirishima patted him lightly on the back. “Nothing to worry about. We won’t say a word till you’re ready.”

How sweet, thought Jirou, but she began to remember what brought them to her room in the first place. “Midoriya, is there anything you want us to do about Mineta? I don’t wanna out you to a teacher or anything, but someone’s gotta hear about this.”

Midoriya’s smile didn’t fade at her question, and Jirou was glad he was calm enough to take the next step. “I… think I’ll tell Mr. Aizawa. Or All Might. They both know. I don’t know what’s gonna happen to Mineta, but honestly… knowing he thinks that about me, I don’t feel safe living a few doors down from someone who thinks I’m in the wrong dorm.”

“Do you want me to get one of them now?”

“No, I’ll find one of them later. Thank you. But,” he turned to Kirishima. “There is something I want to ask. You were the first person to stand up, or say something. Even when you weren’t sure if someone was gonna agree with Mineta, even when you didn’t know there was a trans person in the room, you still stood up for what was right. Why?”

Kirishima blushed, humbled by the compliment. “Ah, well… I gotta little sister who’s trans, see? And she’s like, the most important person in my life. There are things that she’s done to live as herself that I could probably never do. So, when he said that, it was like a punch to the gut. My sister is a real girl, no matter what fuckwads like Mineta say.” Then, as an afterthought, “Excuse my language.”

Midoriya nodded, happy to hear he had experience as an ally. At least he didn’t have to worry about him asking invasive questions. And seeing as Jirou was a rather private person herself, he didn’t feel like he would have to worry about her either. Bakugou already knew, of course, and he was forever thankful it was the one thing about him Bakugou never beat him up over. Of course, he knew Mineta would never let him see the end of it if he ever found out, which Midoriya did not plan on letting happen. That left 15 classmates to worry about.

Jirou could see the fear hadn’t completely left his face yet, lines of worry creasing around his eyes. She desperately reached for something to say, but she knew this was new to her, and she didn’t want to mess up. “Uh, Midoriya… I’ve never really had experience with this kinda thing, but, I just wanna know that I will always back you up on this, no matter what you want to do. I’m sure Kirishima agrees.” He nodded vigorously in agreement. “If anyone in our class gives you a problem, just let us know, and we can deal with them. Even Bakugou. And especially Mineta.” She punched her palm for emphasis.

Midoriya shook his head with a small chuckle. “Thank you, Jirou, but don’t don’t think that will be necessary. I hope it won’t be. Everyone was so pissed at Mineta, at least I know they don’t hate trans people. I just hope they don’t mind their classmate being trans. But let’s forget this for now. I’ll let them deal with Mineta out there. For now, I’m just happy to know I have some friends on my side. Could I… do you guys mind if I ask for a hug?” He asked shyly.

Kirishima’s eyes sparkled like he’d gotten his hero license. He swung his arm around Midoriya, pulling him close, and grabbed Jirou’s sleeve and dragged her to her bed, squeezing the pair with all his might. “I’m always here if you need a hug Midoriya!” Was he… crying?

Jirou was so baffled by her classmate’s tears, she couldn’t help but laugh. “So much for your ‘manly’ image, eh, Kirishima?”

“Hey, what’s unmanly about crying? Midoriya cries all the time, and he’s the manliest guy I know!”

Midoriya was so stunned by the comment, he began to laugh through the joyful tears springing from his eyes, and soon, the three friends were laughing their heads off, not a care in the world. And Midoriya knew, somehow, everything would be okay.

[decouvrir-le-monde]

I guess I’ll admit, I had my concerns about Japan. It being the first non-Western country I’ve really ever visited, I balked at the language barrier, worried about inadvertently committing some unforgivable faux pas, or not being able to order food. Despite my anxieties, or perhaps because of them, Tokyo was the destination I was most excited about. A goal for this trip was to experience the world outside of my comfort zone, and Tokyo has been where I’ve felt that the most vividly, and it’s also been the most rewarding.

But of these existential cultural fears, my most immediate concern on arrival was figuring out the dizzying labyrinth of colors and lines and numbers and characters that is the Tokyo subway system. At midnight, when we arrived, we were afraid that some lines would be closed. Luckily for us, the staff at the airport information desk was extremely helpful and nice, and they had a helper stationed by the subway ticket machines (the kind of ticket machine that has online tutorials for foreigners) to help confused souls like us. We were taken care of.

I suppose I only realized that taking care of others here extends beyond airport officials just trying to make everything go smoothly when we were transferring trains, and a man who had ridden the same subway car from the airport saw me looking at a map, and went out of his way to ask where we were going in order to help us find the right platform.

Following this, acts of common graciousness towards us foreigners have not stopped; a cashier helped me count out exact change when I was struggling with their currency, a restaurant owner offered to give us an umbrella when it started raining outside, and another woman held the door open for the elevator for the subway and when I proceeded to face front, she kindly let me know that the doors would be opening behind us. And these are all accompanying smaller things.

It is still intimidating to enter a restaurant, being unable to effectively communicate (I only know about a dozen words and phrases), but those few who don’t speak English are still very committed to trying to figure out what they can help you with, without getting annoyed. I never want to be presumptuous about what others are willing to help me with because I came to their country without being able to speak the language, but my concerns have not come to fruition, and at this point I don’t expect them to in the slightest.

This common courtesy extends beyond foreigners; I have yet to see one person litter, jostle the person next to them, or be a public nuisance in any way. The streets and subway are impeccably clean, and the people are considerate and keep to themselves. It’s also—incredibly, considering the population—one of the safest cities in the world; the crime rate is one of the lowest. Tokyo prioritizes safety, and it seems to me, especially for young women. There are entire subway lines for only women (certain ones allow men if they are accompanying women), there are female-only bars, and lone men are prohibited from entering purikura (cutesy, editing photo booths aimed at teenage girls) as a way to protect the intended clientele. All of these precautions seem to have had an actual real effect on the way women are treated outside of these safe spaces, and I see young women walking casually by themselves very late at night, with earbuds in and unconcerned about those around them. This all feels somewhat liberating, especially compared with Rome (as well as Paris to some degree, not to mention the US) where it’s hard to go anywhere alone without having to deal with unwanted attention. Here, I can go out alone without it being a big deal, and that truly is enfranchising.

Tokyo itself is like New York but much cleaner, more polite, and with more bright lights and video advertisements. There are jingles and advertisement screens on the subways and there are parts of the city where no square footage goes to waste where advertisers are concerned; every building is covered in flashing lights and billboards. Central Shinjuku—about a 15 minute walk from our apartment—is one certain hub. Walking among the large screens flashing advertisements about one thing or another, navigating between arcades leaking smoke, bright, colored lights, and aggressively happy music, and negotiating the crowds of a big city is a sensory experience in itself. Even after having visited NYC, I can honestly say I’ve never experienced anything like it.

a typical street in Shinjuku

golden gai

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streets and streets of advertisements

the view from our apartment

But I have to say, my favorite parts of Tokyo are the small backstreets and corners hiding tiny yakitori and soba bars that seat five people at a time. It’s in these cramped tangles of alleys in between buildings that locals find themselves looking for a meal after work or a night in the city and this is where we found ourselves, partly by accident, late at night one day. One soba bar in particular recommended itself by the six-seven person line of young, smartly dressed businessmen waiting for a quick seat to slurp some noodles at the end of their day. We ended up eating at a dumpling shop nearby that day, but the next time I was looking for a place to eat (Andrew had eaten a particularly big meal earlier that day), I was surprised to somehow find myself again at the shop and this time, there was no line. The shop itself is on a corner so it fits a few more seats than the average shop around there; about nine people can eat there at a time, but by the time I got there (it was quite late), only four seats were taken.  The two granite bars enclose what can only be described as a very cramped kitchen, but I might say the word “kitchen” is generous. There’s a rack of portion-sized tempura vegetables, “fried balls” (I have no clue what those are), eggs, and some other ingredients, and on the other side, a huge pot of hot broth with a specialized strainer in it, and standing room for the shop owner to make everything. Using the Japanese word for “I would like”, I clumsily ordered their special: soba broth and noodles with a harf boiled egg and tempura vegetables (sic.). It came quickly—hot and steaming—by the expert hands of someone who has clearly been here so long, his hands no longer need instructions. I asked him, as he handed my my bowl, if I could have “mizu” (water), but unable to pronounce it correctly, the older woman next to me and her daughter translated then told me you get it from a little container next to her, and she filled up a glass for me. The older woman asked if I liked my food, and when I told her how amazing it was, she translated my complements to the chef, who bowed and smiled. Then we made small talk for a bit, and she gave me bits of advice. When they left, she held my shoulder and said it was good to meet me and wished me the best of luck. I paid a little while later and when I stood up, I bowed and said domo arrigato (thank you) and sugoi oishii (very delicious). 

The size of these restaurants make sense when you see how many people dine alone. Even at full size restaurants, there are often those eating alone; it’s a Western cultural faux pas that does not exist here in the least. We went to a ramen bar yesterday, and the entire restaurant is geared towards solo eaters, and designed to mitigate human interaction. It was so incredibly different from anywhere I’ve ever been before. And it is one of the best meals I’ve ever had. We found it (mostly due to luck) and descended a flight of stairs to be greeted by two ticket machines. After paying and ordering at the machine, you are given tickets for each item and you find a booth. Each stool along the bar is separated with a wooden divider, that you can fold away if you happen to come with more than one person, and separated from the kitchen by a wall that cuts away just below chin level so that you can hand over your tickets and get your food (without making eye contact). After taking a seat, we were passed small order forms in Japanese. After struggling for about five minutes with Google Translate and best guessing, someone came around on the other side of the wall and passed us English forms. After filling out what toppings, spice-level, and level of noodle softness, our forms were swiftly taken and our food came a few minutes later. Once we got our steaming ramen topped with green onions and spices, and an egg on the side, our waitress turned sideways, bowed low enough that we could glimpse her red kimono, said something in Japanese, and brought the shutters down so that we were now facing a solid wall. Very little human interaction at all. Then came the first taste. It was the best ramen I’ve ever had, and our local ramen restaurants are pretty amazing. All I can say is that this was the first time I’ve ever finished an entire bowl. Sugoi oishii.

Speaking of sugoi oishii, I want to mention two street foods that I had while visiting Sensoji temple in Asakusa yesterday: agemanju and dango. Agemanju are warm bites of fried rice batter filled with red bean paste. The one I got was sesame rice batter, and it was crispy and warm and perfectly light, sweet, and substantial and I’ve wanted another one since. After walking a bit to try and get a bit more hungry, I decided to try dango: skewers of grilled rice flour dumplings glazed with a sweet soy sauce. These spherical dumplings are crunchy and browned on the outside and warm, glutinous, and gently sweet on the inside.

age manju: grilled rice balls glazed in sweet soy

red bean paste pastry from the supermarket

the amazing soba noodles

an unidentified (but delicious) edamame and bread concoction from the bakery

the. best. ramen. I’ve. ever. had.

At Sensoji temple, I got my first taste of old Tokyo. The street food is only the first thing. I’ve never been to a buddhist temple before and there were many traditions that had not been included in the articles I read about how to visit respectfully. There was a washing/purification basin and a structure burning incense that I expected, but there was also a wall lining the pathway to the temple filled with drawers that you could pay 100 yen to shake vigorously. I still do not know what this was.

Koi pond next to the Sensoji temple

Sensoji temple

Sensoji temple

The last thing I can talk about Shinjuku station. The busiest in the world, it is truly dizzying. There is a maze of food, clothing, and trinket stores accompanying restaurants and bakeries interspersed with entrances to vast numbers of different subway lines as everyone bustles and weaves their way to their own individual destinations. Each time I’ve gone into the station, I’ve ended up going around in circles until finally finding what I’m looking for.

I wish I had a few more months in Tokyo. The days are going by so quickly, and I’m still constantly discovering things. The other day, for example, I was sitting and reading in the Shinjuku-Chuo park quite early in the morning (so early that there was no one around me) when I looked up and found myself surrounded by senior citizens all wearing loose-fitting white shirts. I decided to get up and walk around, and a few minutes later, music started emanating from the center of the park and everyone had got up and begun stretching. There were probably hundreds of seniors spilling out from the center, following directions from what I later learned is called radio taiso. It’s a form of stretching and conditioning that is broadcasted on the radio every morning, and projected in the parks. I will miss that sense of wonder and discovery when we go home. In a few days, we’re off to Kyoto, and then our trip comes to a close. I’m still having trouble wrapping my head around that.

Tokyo, Japan: I guess I'll admit, I had my concerns about Japan. It being the first non-Western country I’ve really ever visited, I balked at the language barrier, worried about inadvertently committing some unforgivable faux pas, or not being able to order food.