#mostly because again he's the skeptic and doesn't believe all of that is real

[vendetta-if]

💠💠

hey I'm just loving the story so so much and that scene with Yvette was *chefs kiss*...sorry this will probably be a long rant its just the things you've made me feel 😩😔...if I could read the entire story right now I'd sell a kidney 😂

I'm hoping we can have more conversations with Yvette like we did to really dive into her character, thoughts and feelings especially towards our MC...I usually have a hard time with her character because it always seems like she doesn't really regret what she did as much and seems more like she's approached MC and doing what she's doing mostly, if not solely, because she feels cornered and not as someone that also regrets their decisions and wishes to repair the relationship they DONT have with their child...I know she can feel both those and they can be her motivations, but it just feels like she's driven by the former and not the latter..so I'm looking forward to our interactions with her and if there will be options to let MCs frustrations, sadness, anger and longing bare before her I will...I'd be open to making amends but she has to know and feel everything her absence put MC through and my MC needs to see her genuinely, proactively and consistently care for them before they consider thinking of them as their mother again, nobody can top papa Vic 😂 he set the damn bar too high but if she can put half as much effort hey then we're getting somewhere...

And i have to say, your characters as well are so well written and realistic and raw that I get so engrossed in every little thing they do and I can't help but feel that they're real people with real scars, issues, hopes, dreams, problems and aspirations and relate with them...because I understand Yvettes thought process its like 'I've come too far to look back now' and she feels like she can't let go of everything she built because it would sort of make all her sacrifices meaningless or she may feel she doesn't deserve too and I think she did mention something like that but I wonder if she knows that hurts my MC more 😭😭

Anyway for an ask i wondering what Yvettes fears and or regrets are 'if they're not spoiler' are towards MC and the relationship between the both of them especially because Yvette is asking them to hunt the man that killed her former lover and father of her child 😅...especially if its a vengeful 'I WILL STOP YOU EVEN IF IT KILLS ME' MC...do they fear losing MC like they did Victor or has that not crossed their mind

Sorry it got pretty long but before i vanish I just want to encourage you and say you're awesome and stay blessed!!! its probably not easy making your content and living your life irl but you do it anyways and for that we are more than grateful 🙏

💠💠

Thank you so much for the kind words 🥰🙏 And I’m glad you’re loving the characters and feel like they’re realistic 🥺🥺 Also, don’t worry about sending this long ask, I love reading you guys’ reactions to the story ❤️ And, don’t sell your kidney for the story, the Morozovs don’t deal in organ trafficking 😆

So, about Yvette, yes, MC will have an optional chance to do a little hang out session with Yvette in the future where they’ll be able to have another conversation with her ☺️

Also, I love how readers interpret the talk with Yvette a little bit differently from each other. Some readily accept her apology and see it as sincere regret, while some, like you, are more skeptical and don’t readily forgive her right away.

Right now, I planned to let those that don’t forgive her the first time to change their mind in the future if they want to. It’s not 100% guaranteed as all plans are subjects to change constantly , but I’d really love to include that.

As for your question, I’m actually not really sure what Yvette’s fears are in the context of her relationship with MC other than messing up her second chance if MC decides to forgive her and MC dying 🥺 She doesn’t really fear MC hating her per se, because it is what she has been believing and expected all these years.

And yes, the thought of losing MC has crossed her mind before, and you can actually see that in the Luka and Yvette Funeral Talk Side Story in case you haven’t checked it out. She would be devastated if MC died, she doesn’t want that. When she came to ask for MC’s help, she just expected MC to talk with Luka or Grandpa and basically just be on standby to help with sharing information about the underworld that’s needed and connecting the group to the Morozovs’ resources and connections, instead of MC actively participating and hunting down the killer 😔

[marshmallowloves]

After several days of complaining about how I could not think of stuff for my ship with Yuga I THINK I've finally got something and now I'm going to make it your guys' problem c:

However I am MERCIFUL so I will put it under a cut, because good LORD it's very long fkdhg.

TL;DR I guess: small fairy girl and magic art man go from enemies -> "I'll tolerate you" -> friends -> enemies again -> friends -> lovers. Ravio is there.

+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+

So I actually DO have a vaguely-outlined story in some old docs on my laptop - I mostly pulled from that, but I've tried to fix it a little to line up with the story of ALBW.

It starts like this...

Old texts tell of a certain man in Hyrule's history - specifically during the Era of Time - named Ammond. He was a devious and corrupt Hylian who led Princess Zelda's army. Obsessed with power, he sought to break Ganondorf free from the Sacred Realm, then steal the Triforce of Power from him in his weakened state. He intended to do this by eliminating the sages, thus breaking the seal. But his position and Hyrule's relation with other races made it difficult to target anyone without suspicion... Except for the elusive Kokiri.

Ammond's plan was to draw out the Sage of the Forest by eliminating the Kokiri. He was clever, and he and his men attacked many Kokiri villages right under the Princess's nose. During these attacks, many Kokiri were stolen and kept as living trophies, being prized for their eternal youth and beauty.

As the attacks continued, Ammond's lust for power began to consume him and led to careless mistakes, which eventually got him caught before his plan could take off. His fate remains unknown to this day, and the remaining Kokiri sunk deeper into hiding until they became little more than a myth.

Fast forward many, many years later. A Kokiri named Koci has only heard whispers and rumors of Ammond, but decides that she wants to see the world outside of her home in the forest without fear. She sets off to explore Hyrule, her fairy Rina by her side and twin maces at her back.

After a while of traveling, however, she starts to have a recurring nightmare about a corrupt Hylian keeping her captive. She fears that those rumors are actually true, and that these dreams are a vision of what may come, or even one of the past. She's about to play it safe and go back home...when suddenly she's confronted by a strange sorcerer, who immediately rejoices upon seeing her - how long he's searched for one of the elusive Kokiri, and now he can finally capture her eternal beauty!

Koci assumes by his words that this is Ammond, and that her nightmare is coming true. She doesn't believe the man when he introduces himself as Yuga, and attacks him while slinging accusations of his "real" identity. They get into a fight, and somehow she manages to overpower the sorcerer... Her weapon at his throat, he insists once more that he's not the man she thinks he is, and he makes her a deal: spare his life, and he'll personally help her find the REAL Ammond - dead or alive - and make sure he never comes back.

She's still very skeptical about his identity, so he tries to ease her doubt further. This Ammond was caught because his hunger for power clouded his judgment and cunning - so then why is Yuga lying beneath Koci right now, bargaining and reasoning with her instead of just overpowering one little Kokiri?

There's truth to his words, and if nothing else, Koci saw what he could do in battle - his unique and powerful magic would definitely be helpful in finding and sealing Ammond. She accepts his offer, and the two of them begin the search.

Of course, all of this is only an act for Yuga to gain Koci's trust, so that he eventually can capture her beauty in one of his prized portraits. It will look so lovely among the paintings of the sage's descendants, which he gathers behind Koci's back in the meantime to pursue his own goal of resurrecting Ganon.

At one point, Yuga asks Koci what Ammond's intentions were by eliminating the Kokiri. At first she simply says it was a wicked reason, but doesn't elaborate as it's too painful right now. The question gets brought up again later, and she's ready to explain, but something interrupts them. For a while, it's kind of like this - when she's just about to tell, something stops her and leaves Yuga in the dark.

By the time Yuga has gathered all the sage descendants, he and Koci - to both of their surprises - have genuinely become rather close, despite their initial motives. Yuga is still going to revive Ganon, but now with the added intention of using their combined power to find and eliminate Ammond, and he wants Koci by his side when it happens. He's moved by her passion for retribution against this man - in fact, that's all he really sees. He assumes that, like himself, no measure is too extreme for her as long as she achieves her goal, so surely she'll be delighted when he shows her what he's been doing.

He tells Koci that he knows where their search will truly take off - Lorule Castle. He brings her there, and the two are met by Link. Yuga explains to Koci that he's met this little worm many times before - in fact, he's been a thorn in his side this whole time, always trying to impede their search for Ammond - but at least Yuga can kill two birds with one stone here.

Koci watches in horror as Ganon is risen, and Yuga begins to merge with the Demon King, excitedly offering her to join him. With Ganon's power, they'll be an unstoppable force! Legions will bow before their immeasurable strength! And Ammond will be nothing but dust when they're through with him!

The process is drawn out longer than in the game - enough for Koci to voice how utterly betrayed she feels. She reveals to him that this is exactly what Ammond tried to do, the whole reason for his wicked acts against the Kokiri. Yuga is no better than he was, and she was a fool to think otherwise - just like Yuga was a fool to think she's as clouded by hatred as he is. He tries to persuade her, saying this is her best shot at finding Ammond, but she says that she would rather find and kill that man with her own hands than be helped by a traitor.

Yuga barely has a second to register this with a flash of remorse, before the merging completes and his mind is shared with Ganon's, eliminating any semblance of empathy and replacing it with pure, raw power and pride. This is when Princess Hilda steps in and holds the beast, sending away Link and Koci with her magic.

While Link ends up in a different area of Lorule, Koci is thrown back to Hyrule - right in front of Link's house, as a matter of fact...or at this point, Ravio's shop. The merchant finds her passed out at the door and brings her in, and when she wakes up, she explains everything that happened - that a Lorulean sorcerer promised to help her track down a monstrous man, but betrayed her and resurrected the Demon King, and now she has two threats to worry about.

What a coincidence, Ravio is also having trouble with this Yuga guy, and is enlisting the aid of the brave Mr. Hero Link to stop him. Maybe Koci also wants to help? Strength in numbers after all! Ravio offers his services in exchange, and Koci eagerly accepts.

Over time she becomes good friends and allies with Ravio too. They share stories of their homes and friends, Koci learns a little more about the world outside the forest, helps him out with his shop sometimes, all kinds of nice stuff. When Link eventually returns, they're introduced, and decide to help each other as well. They all currently share a common goal - to stop the Demon King.

Koci travels with Link after that, and they follow the rest of the game's plot. At the end, the Demon King is defeated and splits apart - Ganon is no more, but Yuga is left behind, broken and battered.

Koci's stupid, dumb idiot heart gets the best of her, and she requests that Yuga be spared, much to the shock of everyone there. As a Kokiri, she's extremely in tune with emotion, and she could sense those last moments Yuga had as himself - where he felt the pang of remorse for losing his one genuine companion. She knows a different man is in there, and she wants that man to come back.

There's definitely some reluctance, but everyone saw the lengths she went to in order to help Link and save both kingdoms... So Koci is given her wish, and allowed to stay in Hyrule Castle, bringing Yuga back with her. Zelda understands Koci's sentiment, but doesn't quite trust it (no surprise there, given all that happened), so the castle is the safest place to keep him, as it's heavily guarded and the entire ordeal has left him without his magic for the time being.

Thus begins what's essentially the Redemption Arc - Yuga proves his regret and loyalty over time, and this time, his true goal is to help her find and eliminate Ammond - for REAL this time.

...And of course, in the process, they both come to terms with their very weird romantic feelings for one another but I uh. haven't really thought about that part as thoroughly as this part gkshfj

[mxliv-oftheendless]

The Bridge of the Demonic Goatman (Part 1)

I thought of this a while back (specifically in the form of a hilarious mental image), and decided, “What the hell? I’m gonna write this.” It’s basically me combining two things I’m currently trash for (KISS and Buzzfeed Unsolved) into an AU, where my target audience is... well, me. On a side note, if you haven’t watched Buzzfeed Unsolved, I would definitely recommend it! It’s a great show, and they do episodes on true crime as well as supernatural cases. Here’s the link to the original episode if you want to watch it. Hope you enjoy!

Due to the sheer length of this story (it’s twenty fucking pages in the Word document), I’m going to have to post this in two parts. This is Part 1. Part 2 will go up tomorrow because it’s 11:30 PM rn and I’m too fucking tired to deal with this crap anymore.

Basic AU summary: It’s Buzzfeed Unsolved, but hosted by Paul Stanley, Gene Simmons, and Vinnie Vincent. Gene is the believer of the supernatural, Paul is the skeptic, and Vinnie is the neutral third party (although he does like to join Paul in messing with Gene when they’re on a ghost hunt). 

Commentary text: 

Paul

Gene

Vinnie (apparently Tumblr doesn’t offer yellow as a color)

Something said in unison (who says it will also be in parentheses)

----

[cold open: camera is in the backseat of a car between the driver and passenger seats, looking through the windshield at the twilight sky. GENE is driving while PAUL is in the passenger seat. Soft haunting piano music plays over the footage]

PAUL: Almost there, Gene… you nervous?

GENE: I’ll probably be more nervous when we get there. How about you?

PAUL: [gestures out at the sunset] How can I be nervous with a sunset like that?

VINNIE: Ah, but remember, Paul. [camera cuts to VINNIE, who is sitting in the backseat] Eventually, the sun will be gone from the sky, leaving us in the foreboding dark of night. Then you’ll be nervous.

PAUL: [turns to look at Vinnie] How poetic.

VINNIE: Thank you.

PAUL: What about you, are you nervous?

VINNIE: Uh… [shrugs] kinda. I mean, we’re potentially going to see a demon.

PAUL: Potentially.

GENE: Don’t worry, Vin. I’ll protect ya.

VINNIE: You say that now, and yet if we actually see it, you’ll probably be cowering behind me and reciting the Lord’s Prayer.

GENE: How can I do that when you’re such a midget?

[Paul laughs. Vinnie leans forward and smacks Gene’s arm.]

[Smash cut: it is now nighttime. Gene, Paul, and Vinnie are now walking through a forest, the only light being from the flashlights coming from the night-vision cameras they are holding. Camera focuses on an old-looking wooden bridge with newer-looking red metal ledges. Gene shines his flashlight on a nearby sign that has text and the Texas state government symbol. The title reads OLD ALTON BRIDGE.]

GENE: Well, here it is. The bridge.

[Cut: Gene, Paul, and Vinnie are now standing at the foot of the bridge.]

GENE: Ready?

PAUL: Yep.

VINNIE: Yep.

GENE: … Paul, you go first.

PAUL: [scoffs at Gene and steps up onto the bridge] Okay.

VINNIE: [steps up onto the bridge and turns to Gene expectantly] C’mon, Gene.

GENE: [sighs then mumbles] God dammit… [slowly steps up onto the bridge]

VINNIE: [grinning at him] See, that wasn’t so hard.

GENE: Shut up, Vinnie.

[camera follows the three as they walk across the bridge, swinging their camera flashlights around. It is so dark that the only parts we can see of the bridge are what shows up in the beams of the flashlights; the rest can only be vaguely made out. Haunting music continues]

PAUL: I’ll be honest, I was kind of expecting something more… I dunno, intimidating, I guess? But no, this seems like a pretty standard bridge. [jumps up and down on it] Sturdy, too.

VINNIE: It’s a little scary, I guess. Though, the fact that we’re here when it’s nighttime probably has a factor in that. In the day time, this probably wouldn’t be scary at all.

[they reach the middle of the bridge]

GENE: Well, now that we’re on the bridge, I guess I should tell you why this bridge is so notorious.

[Vinnie nods]

PAUL: Okay. Enlighten us, Gene.

[haunting music stops. Gene stares at Paul, who looks calmly back at him]

GENE: Can you even look a little bit worried? Or just… you know what, never mind.

[Intro sequence, then title card]

[Gene, Paul, and Vinnie are now sitting on the foot of the bridge. From left to right: Gene, Vinnie, Paul]

VINNIE: This week on Buzzfeed Unsolved, we investigate Old Alton Bridge, aka the Goatman’s Bridge, as part of our ongoing investigation into the question, “Are ghosts real?”

GENE: [nods at the camera]

PAUL: [shakes his head at the camera]

VINNIE: [shrugs at the camera] Well, we may find out tonight. Gene?

GENE: Although that is our overall question, this bridge and the woods surrounding it are said to harbor something much more sinister than ghosts.

PAUL: [sounding maybe too light given the context] Demons!

GENE: [rolls his eyes but nods] Yeah, demons. As we’ve stated before, I will only consent to one demon episode per season, and this is that episode.

PAUL: You look pretty nervous. [looks to the camera and points at Gene] I dunno if you guys can tell, but Gene is looking pretty nervous right now. He’s just good enough of an actor that only Vinnie and I can tell.

VINNIE: I think we’re all a little nervous, to be fair. Just sitting on the foot of the bridge is making me feel slightly nervous. [pause in which he looks over at Gene and laughs] You’ve got kind of a glazed look, Genie.

GENE: I just—okay, I am getting kind of nervous. Let’s just get this over with.

PAUL: All right. Let’s get to the background stuff so we can dive right into the summoning part and see if any of us get possessed and/or murdered.

[Gene and Vinnie stare at him]

GENE: … Please don’t put it like that, Paul.

[Paul laughs]

[screen cuts away from the three to a black background with the shape of the state of Texas in white. Text and images appear on screen as Gene’s voice narrates]

GENE [voiceover]: In 1884, Old Alton Bridge was built in Denton, Texas, to connect the town of Alton to Denton. Alton was an extremely small town that consisted of only one person when it was established in 1848.

Wait, there was only one person in the entire town?

Yep.

Seriously? One person? And that was enough for it to be a town?

Yeah. One person.

*wheeze* Ha ha, that’s great.

Also, isn’t Denton the town from Rocky Horror Picture Show? The one Brad and Janet are from?

Oh yeah, it is! Oh my God, what if we did the Time Warp on the bridge?

Oh hell yeah, let’s do that!

*sigh* Dammit.

(Paul and Vinnie) Janet!

It was chosen as the legal center of Denton County. After the county seat was moved to Denton, residents of Alton moved to other towns, and Alton eventually disappeared. Today, the bridge is no longer permitted for vehicle use. But lucky for us, the bridge is available for pedestrian crossing.

*snorts* “Lucky for us”… the sarcasm.

You’re a master of sarcasm, Genie. 

--

[Paul, Gene, and Vinnie are standing by the parked car. The trunk is open, and Gene is rummaging through the contents of the trunk while Paul and Vinnie watch]

PAUL: I swear I’m not trying to scare you, Gene, but… I genuinely am getting a bad feeling about this place.

GENE: I am not listening to you, Paul.

PAUL: No, I’m actually serious this time! Vinnie, you can tell I’m serious, right?

VINNIE: I mean, I am getting kind of a bad feeling as well…

GENE: Don’t worry, guys. [straightens up] I came prepared tonight. [starts to unbuckle his belt]

VINNIE: I’m flattered, Genie, but I thought we were hunting down a demon. Plus, Paulie’s with us. And what would Shannon think?

GENE: [stops and stares at him in confusion] What would she think about… [he slowly realizes what Vinnie means] No! Not like that, Vinnie!

[Paul laughs. Vinnie smirks at Gene]  

GENE: Both of you shut up, that’s not what I meant at all! I mean I brought protection!

VINNIE: [grinning] Oh, well at least we won’t have to worry about that. I still think the setting is rather inappropriate, though.

[Paul continues to laugh]

GENE: I mean—I didn’t—shut the fuck up! This is what I’m talking about!

[Gene holds up a leather holster. In the holster is a squirt gun made of blue plastic]

PAUL: [stares at it, then bursts out laughing again] What the hell, Gene?

VINNIE: [trying not to laugh] Gene… why do you have a squirt gun?

GENE: [talking as he attaches the holster to his belt] It’s filled with holy water. I thought of it yesterday. It started out as a joke, but then I thought about it, and it’s actually a pretty good idea.

PAUL: [still laughing] You’re going to protect yourself against a dangerous demon… with a squirt gun filled with holy water?

GENE: Laugh all you want, Paul, but at least I’ll be safe from any demon that tries to sneak up on us. Just think, our backs will be turned, the demon’s sneaking up on us… [acts out this scene] I’ll just go, “Hey, guys, look at these bushes—[whirls around and whips out his squirt gun] freeze, demon!”

VINNIE: Smart.

GENE: I know, right?

--

GENE [voiceover]: Obviously, we didn’t travel all the way down to Texas to observe just a plain old bridge. What brings us to Old Alton Bridge is the meaning of its nickname, “the Goatman’s Bridge.” There are many legends of bridges acting as gateways to another realm, and perhaps this bridge is one of those gateways. Old Alton Bridge and the surrounding woods are said to harbor a dark entity: a demon, that is half-goat and half-man. The Goatman is said to have, quote, “glowing empty eyes” and goat-like horns. The reason for this entity’s existence is unknown, but has many iterations. One common story is that Satanists have carried out rituals on the bridge, that opened the door for this demon and perhaps many others.

There are actually records of people practicing rituals in the forest and on the bridge.

Really?

Yeah.

Oh, so your kind of people.

My kind of—how am I a Satanist?

Because you believe in all the crap they believe in.

Yeah but—I don’t go around performing rituals to summon demons. I respect it, and stay away from it. That’s completely different.

Okay, you’re right about that. That’s fair.

You also go to the synagogue.

*snorts* Yeah, I also go to the synagogue.

GENE [voiceover]: Another popular story is that a successful African American goat farmer was lynched and hanged on the bridge by Klansmen, returning from the dead as the Goatman.

Fuckin’ assholes…

Do we know why they lynched him?

Yeah, because he was African American and he was doing better than them. That’s it. That’s why.

… Okay, fair enough.

Yeah, that’s fair.

GENE [voiceover]: If this story is true, then it would explain why the Goatman looks as it does, since once again, the African American was a goat farmer. However, there are no records of an African American goat farmer living or even existing in that area anywhere in the 1930s or in prior decades. Furthermore, if this story is true, then the Goatman would simply be the ghost of the goat farmer, instead of a demon like the Goatman has been claimed to be. Additionally, demons are preternatural beings, and therefore not human.

So you don’t think the Goatman’s the goat farmer.

Uh, no, I don’t. See, the thing is, if it was just the ghost of the goat farmer, then the Goatman would be just…

A man.

Yeah, just a man. There really wouldn’t be any reason for him to become some version of a Minotaur.

Yeah, that makes sense.

However, the fact that it’s half man and half goat makes it more likely that it’s a demon.

Plus, aren’t there medieval drawings showing Satan with goat legs?

Yeah, that too.

I just have to object to one thing you said. You said it was some version of a Minotaur.

And?

And that is a false statement. A Minotaur is half-man-half-BULL.

Oh—Oh, well excuse me—

Then it would be the BULLman.

—Mr. Greek Mythology Expert.

Paul, you don’t even think the GOATman is real, why are you so stuck on details?

I’m just trying to make sure everything that’s said is accurate.

You wouldn’t think it was real even if it WAS the Bullman.

That’s true. I wouldn’t think it’s the Bullman. I’d think it’s BullSHIT.

*laughter*

GENE [voiceover]: But tonight, our goal is not to find out why this demon exists. Tonight, our goal is to make contact and try to catch footage of this elusive and dangerous demon, as proof that it is real. We can only hope that this evidence does not come at a great cost…

--

[cut to Paul, Vinnie, and Gene walking on the bridge]

PAUL: Are there any demons here with us? Perhaps a demon formerly known as the Goatman?

VINNIE: Prince reference?

PAUL: Yeah, thanks for noticing.

GENE: Let your presence be known… say something… make a noise…

PAUL: Throw us off the bridge…

GENE: Shut up, Paul. [speaks aloud] Why are you on this bridge?

[silence]

GENE: One of you ask it something.

PAUL: Why are you on this bridge?

[Gene rolls his eyes at Paul while Vinnie snickers]

PAUL: [in a dramatic voice] Goatman! [still silence] Nothing’s happening.

VINNIE: Well, obviously.

PAUL: What if we try yelling at it?

GENE: What?

PAUL: I mean, what if we try and agitate it? To try and bring it out?

VINNIE: Like, egg it into showing itself?

PAUL: Yeah!

VINNIE: Yeah, that could work! Can I do it with you?

PAUL: Yeah, let’s do it. Gene—

GENE: I’m just gonna… gonna let you guys do it. I don’t wanna be part of what you guys are doing.

PAUL: Okay.

VINNIE: Yeah, you stay out of it, that way if anything happens to us you can call our families.

PAUL: You want to go first?

VINNIE: No, you go first.

PAUL: Okay… [a few beats of pause] Fuck you, Goatman!

GENE: Oh my God—

VINNIE: Oh, we’re just gonna go all-out? Okay, let me try. [shouts] Hey! Hey, Goatman! You’re no good, Goatman!

PAUL: You’ll never be shit!

VINNIE: You’re just like your father!

GENE: Oh for fuck’s sake—

PAUL: Goatman! [starts dancing in place] See that? I’m dancing on your bridge!

GENE: Paul!

VINNIE: [also starts dancing] We’re dancing on your bridge because we don’t believe in you! Fuck you, Goatman!

PAUL: This is our bridge now! We claim this bridge for ourselves!

GENE: Jesus Christ, we’re gonna die—

VINNIE: You want us off this bridge? You’re gonna have to kill us! Whatcha gonna do, throw us off the bridge?

GENE: He did throw someone off the bridge once.

PAUL: Nah, he’s not gonna throw us off the bridge, y’know why? [shouts] ‘Cause he’s a CHICKEN! [starts clucking like a chicken]

GENE: I swear to God, both of you…

VINNIE: Paulie, c’mere. [they start doing a tango] See that, Goatman? We’re dancing on your bridge!

PAUL: We disrespect your bridge, Goatman!

GENE: Oh, for Christ’s sake—he’s taking names right now, you two.

PAUL: You ain’t shit, Goatman! We own your bridge now!

VINNIE: You hear that, Goatman?

PAUL: Me, Vinnie Vincent, and Gene Simmons own your bridge!

GENE: Paul, don’t you dare loop me into your shit. Stop it.

PAUL: Well, tell him you’re not part of it!

GENE: [speaks aloud] I’m not part of this! Okay? They’re just being assholes.

PAUL: You’re talking to Goatman now. [Paul and Vinnie grin at him]

GENE: … You son of a bitch—

VINNIE: Goatman entrapment, Genie, you’ve been caught. [high-fives Paul] Goatman!

GENE: Guys, stop it.

PAUL: This is our bridge now, Goatman! [Paul and Vinnie continue dancing and jumping up and down on the bridge]

GENE: I swear to God, you two—

VINNIE: They’re gonna write OUR names in graffiti!

GENE: If something appears and kills you, I’m not giving your eulogies.

PAUL: People will come here and tell tales of US!

PAUL and VINNIE: What do ya say to that, Goatman?

[silence]

GENE: I hate you both.

--

GENE [voiceover]: People have reported a growling voice telling them to “get off the bridge.” One person said that after he and his friend heard the voice, he ran off the bridge while his friend stayed. He then watched as his friend was seemingly dragged off the bridge and thrown into the river below. People have also heard hooves following them across the bridge, as if they were being chased off. It’s often said that the Goatman can be conjured by knocking three times on the bridge.

--

[on the bridge, Gene goes up to one side of the bridge and hesitantly raises a fist]

GENE: All right. I’m gonna… knock three times on the bridge… and we’ll see what happens.

PAUL: What if the Goatman bites your hand off?

GENE: Paul—

PAUL: And then he stuffs it in your mouth and makes you eat it?

[Gene and Vinnie stare at him]

VINNIE: … What the fuck, Paul?

PAUL: What? He might do that. He’s a demon.

GENE: Fuck you, Paul. You’re making this worse.

PAUL: Fine, sorry.

GENE: [turns back to the side of the bridge] Okay… here we go…

[Gene knocks on the side of the bridge three times. They all stand back]

GENE: Now it’s said that when you do that, you can see his glowing eyes. [glances around]

PAUL: [laughing] What a load of horseshit…

VINNIE: Quiet, Paul.

[silence. Nothing happens]

GENE: Well, I’m not doing it again. Either of you want to?

VINNIE: [shrugs] I’ll do it. [goes up to the side and knocks three times. Steps back.]

[silence again. Nothing happens]

VINNIE: All right, Paul, now you do it.

[Paul goes up to the side and raises his fist. Then he stops and looks around in a theatrical way]

GENE: For fuck’s sake, Paul, just do it!

PAUL: [shrugs] Hey, Goatman! [knocks three times]

[silence again. All three look around. The camera passes over parts of the bridge]

PAUL: You know, if you want me off this bridge, you’re gonna have to throw me off.

[still silence. Nothing happens. There is a long stretch in which none of them move or speak]

GENE: Okay, we’re done with that. Let’s go into the woods.

VINNIE: We’re going into the woods?

GENE: Yep. Let’s go.

[they all turn and start to walk off the bridge. Paul turns around and looks out into the darkness]

PAUL: We’ll be back, Goatman. After all, this is our bridge now.

VINNIE: Yeah, remember that, Goatman.

GENE: Would you both shut up?

PAUL: That’s how you get them to come out, Gene.

GENE: That’s not how you get them to come out, that’s how you get them to kill you.

PAUL: Assuming you don’t kill me first, right?

GENE: Exactly.

To be continued in Part 2!

[queenofbaws]

I'm a bit late but all your writings seemed so creative on this game, I had to participate too! ❤ So, why not... Edgar? 🌹

Conversations With Death

Rated T A “CREEPiverse” fic

He’d heard the rumors, of course - how could he not? Every year, it seemed, they only grew more and more ridiculous, more fantastical. Oooh, the upper floors of the campus library are haunted, that’s why no one uses them. They’ll tell you it’s because of things like “structural degradation” or “toxic mold spores” or, even more preposterous, “remodeling,” but those are all lies. Paltry, pathetic lies! Lies meant to cow you, to keep you oblivious! No, no, the library’s upper floors are terribly, horribly haunted, that’s why you’re not allowed up there.

And obviously those rumors were all absolutely true, but what fun was there in telling people that? It was so much more amusing to play the part of spooky skeptic, to deny, deny, deny, and sow doubt in the hearts of all those who asked. But miss Brown and her friends are nothing if not true believers so...well. Maybe Edgar will make an exception this time around.

...

“Everything all right while I was away, then?”

It was a funny thing, really...if you’d asked him three, maybe four years ago whether he’d consider opening his floor to an assistant, his only real answer would’ve come in the form of a scowl. Maybe a raised eyebrow. Certainly not an assent, and even more certainly not an enthusiastic one. But he’d be a liar if he didn’t admit now, as Ashley turned her darkly lined and doleful eyes on him, that seeing her there shelving books with the utmost care didn’t fill his ancient, gnarled heart with something like kinship. It wasn’t often one found a kindred spirit, and yet there she was - just as natural among the stacks as he felt, himself.

“Fine!” she said, perhaps still a bit too quickly, as was her wont; sometimes it seemed like she was very worried he’d change his mind and send her on her way, firing her from the campus position he, himself, had recommended her for. “I’m mostly done with all of the returns from over break, and it was totally quiet the whole time. Except...”

He hadn’t even unslung his bag from his shoulder when he stopped, carefully scrutinizing the look that came over her face then. It wasn’t fear, which was good, considering how nervous she tended to skew, but it certainly wasn’t a positive emotion. “Except?” he prompted, resuming his usual habit of unsnapping his bag, removing what he needed, setting it on his desk, and snapping the bag shut again. From the very corner of his eye he continued to watch her face. There was no point in assuming, but if he’d been a betting man...

“Huh? Oh! Oh, it’s nothing. Never mind. I just...I went to answer a phone call in the stairwell earlier...” Ashley paused there and did her own surreptitious glancing his way, the corners of her mouth pulling in as if she were expecting such a crime to be punishable by death or something much, much worse, “...and I could’ve sworn...”

“You heard people conversing upstairs.” He felt her attention snap to him in the same way, he had to imagine, a cat felt a mouse’s ears prick towards its footfalls. “I’m sure you did. It was likely...what, quarter to four, abouts? They tend to get chatty around that time.”

There was a moment of quiet from her then, and the air of the floor seemed to grow heavy with the weight of her thoughts. She was good at that, Ashley Brown, very good at it indeed - putting pieces together, no matter how unpleasant the shape. “But...no one’s allowed to go upstairs,” she said slowly, her eyes telling him she already suspected what he was about to tell her, and simply wanted more than anything for him to say anything else.

“No one is,” he said with a slight shrug, settling down into his usual spot behind the desk. “Unfortunately for them, miss Brown, no one up there is allowed to leave, either. A sticky situation, if ever there was one.”

send me a flower and i'll make up a fic (that doesn't exist [yet {because we all know how bad my self restraint is}])!!!

[shyrose57]

It works very much like illusions. Ranbob can see him but can't touch him. While Dream can touch him (though it feel like more of a faint touch). The entire time Ranbob feels like he's dreaming but due to physical evidence, like notes left by Dream, he knows it isn't a dream. He's just kinda existing. But in actuality he's not completely "there", sometimes he is aware of what's going on (though he never remembers more often than not) but that's when Dream allows it, other than that he's either floating aimlessly in the void or dreaming. Not aware of what's happening. 

Definitely, Enderman tend to be 7 ft+. Infact when traveling and Enderman spot Ranbob, they always voice their worry about him being so short. They know he's a hybrid so he was always going to be shorter than them, but he shouldn't have been this short. His growth is permanently stunted. Its a miracle he even got those 2 inches to be honest. Ran was definitely caught off guard seeing Ranbob so short. But quickly dismissed it in favor of attacking him. But later on as time passes, he can't dismiss the unease and concern he gets when he thinks about the difference so easily as he did eailer. The Gladiators notice right away but don't comment on it, the Fishermen think Ranbobs height is normal so when they meet Ran and learn Enderman hybrids typically grow that big and bigger their caught off guard, Cletus and Charles attempt to question Ran what its like to be so tall but Benjamin stops them. 

He did, the Dream Mask has a small bit of it broken off due to it being dropped (Ranbob didn't break it. He suspects maybe when it was being transferred it got dropped in its holding box and thats what broke it). Ranbob picked it up because he meant to throw it away, but he forgot too. Giving Dream more time to get a hold on him. They talked about whatever came to mind at first since Benjamin didn't want to start off with the rough questions. But eventually the two did start to talk about what happened to Ranbob and who/what Dream was.

Dream does not consider it important enough because he thinks he's never going back there. So it falls into disrepair and gets all dusty with some mold even growing in the room. 

Dreams petty and likes being in control of everything. But Dream would just kinda wander, making sure no ones alive. Every now and again he'll get bored and just destroy something. The fishermen explored and read about the history of Mizu while they were there, then after Ranbob attacked them spent most of the time arguing about what to do with him. 

It just leads to Cletus being mean/rude to Ranbob and taking much longer than the others to be comfortable around him. If that's what you mean.

-------------------

Yes! When it was down to just 4 people left alive in Mizu, Ran stumbled upon the 4th person dead, then it all kind of clicks in his head, as the only other person currently alive is a Council Member, that it has to be his brother. So he rushes off to find the Council Member so they can stop Ranbob, only to find Ranbob standing over his dead corpse. Thats when the chase around Mizu ticks off that ends with Ran fleeing Mizu. 

Cause while spiders are passive in daytime, creepers aren't, and don't burn in the light. Plus they are loud with their explodes (yet oddly quiet) which can give his position away.

Eh I'll say. Their not really super common because mixing them can cause serious side effects during and after mixture. But the healing, sleep aids, and infection mixtures are common as they've been figured out and can safely be made. Fun fact: Subbin actually has an entire community and an official place in the government for figuring out potion mixtures, making new ones, and making the mixing process as safe as possible. 

The group doesn't really use the mixtures much, expect for Rans sleep aid and a every now and again healing mixture when a Pit match goes wrong. Cause Grievous used to intern in a potion shop and learned all about them then.

He really did. 

Your right! Not many people traverse it. Because he was a Technoblade follower, and they typically get taught the bare basics of surviving in environments like the Nether, deserts, snow, caves, etc in their teachings. He got da book from his Idol teachers, everyone in his Idol group got a book as well. 

You can ask! I welcome any and all questions.

There's gold coins (I forget the actual in-game name oop) ore deposits in the Nether, so he mines that. Not any specific ones, cause there is still a language barrier and a mostly gesture barrier (expect for the universal ones like wait, ok/good, no harm, etc). 

They made a group decision to try to check the Nether on a whim. Though mostly cause one guy just wouldn't shut up about it. They found a broken portal and managed to repair it enough to enter.

The Fishermen and Ranbob where kinda confused (cause Ran hadn't fully told them about his time on the run.) But expressed sympathy at his house being burned down. Jackie and Grievous wanted to search it for anything usable, Ran didn't let em cause he thinks there's nothing left. Watson shoots Ran a sympathetic look and declared that he wants to keep moving to find shelter. Benjamin quickly agreeing and the group moves on.

---------Tip of The Iceberg-----------

He does not expect in all of their times he's still the God of the world. 

Honestly, most of them were fine. Bad was the only one who was mad and wasn't ok with it. The Masquerade, The Pit, Sam, Sapnap, Quackity, Foolish, Ranboo, Skeppy, Tubbo, Tommy, and Karl all say the Egg wrote it because they all have had experience with the Egg. The Haunted Mansion, The Wild West, George, Fundy, Eret, Jack, Niki, and Puffy all say XD because they've either had no experience with the Egg or believe in XD's existence. Philza and Technoblade actually go both ways. (If I forgot someone, oops). 

Technoblade, Phil, Niki, The Pit, The Wild West, Puffy, Sapnap, and Sam are all on the Frontline. While the others are all split between research into the egg (The Masquerade is in this one of course), and running tests. Fundy is a runner, delivering orders, requests, or new information. Foolish is on both the researching, testing, and frontlines, he is on the frontlines when needed but otherwise is researching and testing. Karl is typically somewhere with one of the many Traveler groups. Quackity, Eret, and Sam (when not on frontlines) are on planning duties. 

The Egg is strong enough to propose a real and constant threat to the groups. Everyone is typically on the move to avoid the reaching of the Egg and its Eggpire. 

Bad hasn't gotten what he wants, which is Skeppy. And as he has "opened his eyes" a bit he sees the hypocrisy, manipulation, and lies that surround the Egg and wants out. 

----------------------

Ye ye Brothers AU sorry.

The fishermen get to their home, wake up the next day, and Ranbob is already making a field for wheat and potatoes. Benjamin fucking squawks and races out to make Ranbob stop. And Isaac eventually has to come out and help cause Ranbob is refusing to leave. Cletus laughs at Ranbob and makes fun of him but stops when he sees Charles sadly staring at him. A silent ask to stop. 

He does but Porkius is chill and let's the Gladiators do whatever they want as long as they are still in fighting condition for matches and gives them money every week. Plus he's chill and is kinda friends with them. But sometimes Porkius has them go to extravagant parties with him. They all hate going, not just Ran. Mostly cause the rich people are snobs and either 1. Constantly insult them in conversation than act surprised when they get mad at them and report it to Porkius. 2. Talk with them but talk exclusively about themselves and are insensitive to the Gladiators. But sometimes there's actually people at the parties who are genuinely curious and kind and want to get to know the Gladiators. Those conversations are pleasant and the Gladiators, no matter who it is, actively enjoy the conversation.

Ran has always been mischievous. Even witnessing murder, being traumatized, hunted constantly, and fighting non-stop hasn't changed that. If anything he got more mischievous over time. 

Something extra I wanted to share: 

-There is music in world and the player the Gladiators share get brought on the trip so they can play music the entire time. 

  -Ran and Grievous fight over who gets to pick music often.

    -Fun fact about why I did this: Every single part of this story and all others has been either created by or inspired by music. For example the Tip of The Iceberg AU was solely inspired by the song True North (by Vocal Line), while Brothers AU was made from Ruler of Everything (by Tally Hall) and partly Mind Electric (by Miracle Musical). So I wanted to include music somehow. (I actually have a entire playlist with music that I've used for certain parts of the Brothers AU.)

Brothers AU:

Interesting, interesting. What triggers these 'dreams'? Can Dream do it, or is it like just something that happens?

I'm assuming only the brothers would know what the Endermen are saying, but there's also body language, so how does everyone react to that behavior? Do one of the brothers ever tell them what's being said, or? What's everyone's thoughts on Ranbob's height, seeing as the Fishermen were surprised, and the Gladiators immediately noticed?

How does Benjamin feel about what he hears? Is he a bit skeptical at first, or fully believing Ranbob's words?

So the room's in disrepair, interesting. At some point, it's mentioned that they go back there, I think, so does that strike anyone as odd?

He destroyed stuff? Like just general items or artifacts? How did Ranbob feel, if/when he was aware?

------------------

Why didn't he assume it was the Council Member? What clues led him to his brother instead?

Understandable.

Oh, that's really interesting!

World building galore, fantastic!

Who was the one guy?

He thinks? Was there something left then?

-----------------

Tip Of The Iceberg AU:

Still the god? He didn't expect that? Was someone else supposed to be? If so, who? What's his reaction to learning such?

Bad seems to be straying from the egg, does he intend to leave it? Or does it have a way to keep him?

Do we have any particular groups here? People who fight or work well together, and kind of drift to one another? What sort of dynamics do we get with all of this, especially since everyone's on the move constantly to avoid the Eggpire.

------------------

Brothers AU:

Benjamin: Whatcha got there?

Ranbob: Excessive labor when I should be resting.

Benjamin, gasping: NO!

What are the parties typically like? Do they behave or cause havoc? Switch it up? Anyone in particular they don't hate talking to there?

Always mischievous, just better at hiding it. Wait, that means Ranbob would have known he was like that, wouldn't he? He'd know exactly what to expect. Would anyone else? Either way, that should be amusing.

------

What kind of music do they have, and what does everyone prefer to listen to?

(Time to go on a song-spree!)

[tinyboxxtink]

"Doppelganger" *Part 8*

Okay ladies and gents, this is where I'd say you really need to have read Black Magic to understand this chapter. You can read it here.

Or, y'know I guess just accept that magic is real in this universe. Whatever. STILL READ IT. YOU WON'T REGRET IT I PROMISE.

If you read this last night, I did rewrite it and reuploaded it. Don't freak out, it's better now I swear.

I did make this signifantly longer though, but I won't lie to you kids-- it's not good. Angst wise, not plot wise. 😉

ENJOYYYYYYY!!!!

Part 7

Part 9

Tag List

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@milkshqke

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@gibbs274

@sassyada

@aprildecker-blog

@bookishfanfic

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@stars-trash-18

@omgsuperstarg

@objection-argumentative

---------------

The next day Rafael decided he needed help, and if he couldn’t go to the squad, he only had one choice.

"....WHAT?!" Chloe screeched after Rafael told her the whole story after meeting up for coffee.

"I know, it's insane I just--" Rafael shook his head.

"I have so many questions. So many--" she started.

"Look I just wanted advice, and maybe …" he trailed off looking in the distance.

"Maybe what….?" She looked at him suspiciously.

"Supernatural help?" He sipped his coffee.

"Oh good God like what? Do you think that's what he used on YN?" Chloe sipped her tea.

"No doesn't need to, he can imitate me perfectly. I'm pretty sure it was just your standard date rape drug." The words made Rafael's fist clench and his lip curl at the thought of Nevada using date rape drugs on you.

"We have to get her out of there, Chloe. We have to," His voice trembled in fear for you.

"Well no shit Sherlock" Chloe pointed out. "You sure it's not the mind control stuff Liv used on you?"

"Liv didn't use mind control potions. She just used an ultra unhealthy amount of love potion. Although I wouldn't put it past her to get some more potions,” Rafael rolled his eyes.

Nearby Alex was listening in on the conversation, since Rafael knew what Javi looked like now. He listened to the rest of your conversation, then bolted before the two of you noticed him.

-----

“Magic potion?" Nevada laughed. are you fucking kidding me?! Dime qué tienen been smoking?!”

"I don't know Vada, he seemed pretty sure about it. And I mean look at the two of you, you're identical and there's no explanation for that. So I don't know, anything might be possible." Alex shrugged. "He said it's how they got together. Some chick named Olivia tried to tear them apart but their "true love" prevailed"."

"Oh , these two are even more fucking pathetic than I thought.” Nevada scoffed. “What do they live in, a fucking Disney movie?" He shook his head, but then had an idea.

"…. Seems like we might have to check with this Olivia," He smiled evilly.

--------

"Rafael" showed up to the squad room to talk to Olivia the very next day.

“Hey Liv” He nodded at her with a sly smile.

"Rafa!" Liv exclaimed. She was excited but nervous to see him. Mostly because she hadn't seen him since the whole 'wedding; debacle.

"Liv, I need you to tell me where you got your mind serum,” “Rafael” told her straight out. Olivia was shocked he was so flippant about it, and being so loud.

".... It wasn't mind serum Rafa it was love serum and-- wait why do you need it?" She looked around nervously, then quickly realized something must have gone wrong with the two of you.

"I think I'll be asking the questions here Liv, you're the one that fucked with me first." “Rafael” crossed his arms.

"You know if you need to control YN with potions, it may not be worth it Rafa.” Olivia told him softly, touching his hand. “I love you just the way you are...." She put a hand to his chest and gave him a sweet smile.

"Why do you think I'm asking? She's getting too wishy washy for me, I just want her to forget about us." Rafael put a hand to her face. "Just tell me where you got it, and we can be together."

"Ok!!" Not questioning it, Olivia started to text the address to Rafael's phone.

"No, I need you to write it down for me." “Rafael” grabbed a notepad and pen from off her desk.

"Why…?" Olivia raised an eyebrow at him.

"....So if my boss decides to do a random sweep of my phone he doesn't think I'm insane, Liv." He replied in a “duh” tone.

"...He can do that?" Oliva’s mouth dropped open.

"...The government can do a lot of things, Liv. Don’t trust them,” “Rafael” sneered. Sure Olivia should have taken that as a red flag, but she was so happy she might get her happy ending with Rafael she didn’t care.

"Right…." She wrote the address down and slipped it to "Rafael".

"Thanks babe," he grabbed Olivia in a giant kiss. Then he strutted out of the office leaving her with a huge smile.

----------

Not even a few hours later, Nevada took the address to an old antique shop. He walked in to see an old woman cleaning an ancient looking broach.

“An old antique shop, bruja? Were you going for totally predictable, or are you just lazy with fronts?”

The woman stopped cleaning and glared at him. “And who the hell are you?”

“Let’s just say I’m a friend of Olivia’s.” He smirked. “And as such, I’m going to need a favor…”

“Oh great are you a cop too?” She sighed.

“....You could say that.” He chuckled.

“So what do you need?” She looked at him skeptically.

“I need a...mind control potion,” Nevada felt like an idiot saying it out loud, but the old woman’s face verifying that such a thing existed made him feel better.

“You people and your God complexes…” She rolled her eyes before disappearing into the back. After a few minutes she came back with an orange liquid in a vial.

“Think of the name of the person you want this to control, and then once they drink this, whatever you think, they’ll do.”

“....Really?” Nevada gave her a sarcastic laugh.

“Oh you doubt my majeria, pendejo?” She snarled. “Then why are you here?”

“Lo siento, señora,” He quickly apologized. “Gracias,” He nodded to the potion and sauntered out of the shop.

--------

The next day Nevada texted Rafael to meet him in a warehouse on his side or town. Rafael immediately went to Chloe’s apartment for advice on what to do, since he didn’t have anyone else.

"This could be a trap." Chloe warned him.

"Of course it could be a trap but what choice do I have?!" Rafael argued.

"Ok but I'm coming," She insisted.

"Oh no you're not" Rafael shook his head.

"I'll stay out of sight, okay dad?” Chloe rolled her eyes.

"No, I don’t like it.” He protested while ignoring the 'dad' comment. “If something goes sideways in there I can’t protect the both of you,”

"I don't care if you like it, she's my best friend so you can suck it up," She crossed her arms. “And I’m a big girl, I can take care of myself,”

“....What’s the chances of me talking you out of this?” He sighed.

“....Ehhhh slim to none,” She smiled.

“Fine, but you’re staying outside,” He warned her as they headed to the address.

------

Rafael and Chloe went to the address, it was a giant warehouse. Rafael went inside, ready for anything. The place was pitch black so he couldn't really see anything.

"Nevada?" He called into the darkness. Suddenly one light in the middle of the warehouse lit up. He walked closer to find you lying there unconscious.

"YN!!!" He screamed, running over and waking you up.

“...What? What happened?” You stirred awake, totally disoriented. Nevada must have knocked you out again.

"Baby! it's me," He picked you up in his arms, holding you so tightly you thought you'd stop breathing. "He let you go, I can't believe it," He was crying now, he was so happy.

"...What? That makes ZERO sense," you pushed him away, looking at him angrily. "....Wait no no, it does make perfect sense-- you're Nevada!"

"What?" Rafael looked at you in shock. "... I'm not Nevada, I'm Rafael, YN! It's me!"

"Okay look I get it,” You crossed your arms. “You can’t just keep me drugged up all the time, and you need new and innovative ways to "be" Rafael-- but this is just cruel,”

“Baby it's me I-- it's me! it's Rafael,” He put his hands on either side of your face, staring intently into them. You wanted to believe him so badly, but all you could think about was the first time this happened. How perfectly Nevada had played Rafael, even down to the look in his eyes. That’s all you saw now, an act. A façade.

“....You've done a hell of a job researching him and perfecting his moves Nevada, but I'm not going to fall for it and I'm not going to keep hurting Rafa,” You pushed him away further, crossing your arms tighter so that he couldn’t get a free show of your exposed breasts in the barely there clothes he dressed you in.

Rafael stared at you in shock and disbelief, how much did he fuck with your mind? How could this be happening?

“....It's me. How else am I--- what can I do to prove to you that it's me? Y/N how can you not see it in my eyes? Look at me!” He grabbed your hands and searched your eyes for some kind of recognition, some kind of feeling.

“Yeah okay it's ‘you’. You are going to save me, and then we're going to go to some ‘safe location’ right? And then we’ll celebrate being ‘back together’ by having some amazing sex. And it’ll be wonderful and amazing, and I’ll cry and tell you how much I love you and missed you, and then you're going to be like ‘hahaha I got you again!’ I’m Not falling for it” Tears came to your eyes as you thought about all the times he had tricked you, and how much it had hurt Rafael every time. You couldn’t get the heartbreak in his eyes out of your brain.

“....God, this is exactly what he wanted…” Rafael muttered. “Carino, it's me I swear to God you have to believe me-- Look I brought Chloe!” He gestured to Chloe who came running over to the two of you.

“...Oh my God, Chloe?” Your eyes widened in seeing your best friend for the first time in days. Usually you two were attached at the hip. He brought Chloe-- Nevada didn’t know about Chloe, did he?

“....Remember the penguins? I proposed to you with the penguins, and-- and I told you that it was my favorite place in New York, and I did that nutty musical number? I worked on that for WEEKS!!! Would Nevada know that?” You heard Rafael talking while you looked from Chloe to him. You took his head in your hands, searching his eyes. They were full of tears, searching your own eyes for the same thing. Love.

“....Rafa?” You whispered, wiping the tears from his cheeks. He took your hand and kissed the side of it.

“It’s me,” He pressed his lips to your forehead. “It’s me, mi amor,”

You grabbed him and pulled him into a kiss. You could feel the difference now, between his mouth and Nevada’s. Rafael kissed you in such a loving, beautiful way. Nevada groped your mouth like a hungry shark. You threw your arms around his neck and kissed him several times on the neck, not getting enough of him. He ran his fingers through your hair as his lips did the same to your face and neck.

Suddenly, a lone clap came from behind you.

“Awwww. No es tan dulce?” Nevada came stepping out of the shadows. “The two lovers, finally reunited. Es tan hermoso,” He wiped away a non-existent tear.

“....What the hell …?” Rafael asked while he helped you both stand up, Rafael stood in front of you protectively.

“Well I had to get some ‘inside’ information didn’t I, cabron? I can’t have you feeding her information only ‘you’ would know to try and break a spell, ¿Correcto??” Nevada crossed his arms as several men came out of the shadows all around you.

“....Spell?” You blinked, trying to play dumb. How did he know about magic?

“Oh shit…” You heard Chloe whisper as she and Rafael exchanged a guilty look. They really should have thought about having that conversation in private.

“I visited your friend, Olivia. She told me where I could find some very interesting...concoctions,” Nevada smirked as he held up an orange vial.

“What? No...no no no!!!!” Rafael’s head darted back and forth as Nevada’s goons inched towards you. Two of them pulled out pistols and aimed them right at him while two more walked up and grabbed you, dragging you away from Rafael.

“No...No! RAFAEL!!!” You screamed, trying to get away from them. He tried to run to you, but two more grabbed him by the arms and put him on his knees.

“...I don't know what the hell it is but don't you dare give her anything else!!!” Rafael yelled as the two men that had you dragged you over to Nevada.

“Oh okay, well just because you said that SO nicely, abogado,” Nevada nodded sarcastically as he grabbed your face.

“Now, open up baby. I know you can swallow,” He smirked while looking between the two of you. You shook your head violently, but Nevada gripped your nose between his fingers preventing you from breathing. You held out as long as you could, but you finally had to gasp for air. As soon as you did so, Nevada poured the orange liquid down your throat. After a few moments, your irises flashed a deep orange.

“....Vada,” You looked at Nevada with dreamy eyes as Rafael stared in horror.

“Finalmente I can stop wearing those God awful trajes,” Nevada grinned, stroking your cheek softly before looking at Rafael.

“And y’know, your girlfriend Olivia really should have just opted for this mind control potion, it works so much more efficiently. Pero, if I had just made your little puta in love with me, I couldn’t get her to do this,” He turned to you. “Baby, go take care of that hijo de puta, para mi,”

“Anything for you, papi,” You nodded with a smile, then turned to Rafael with a deep raging fire in your eyes.

“Let’s dance abogado,” You growled.

“No! No, Y/N you can't do this! I'm not going to hurt you,” He pleaded with you.

“Well that sucks for you,” You lunged for him, but he grabbed you by your arms. “

“Hey no no no, look at me!” He forced you to look at him. “Remember the penguins? I took you to see the penguins and I--"

Nevada closed his eyes and changed your memory with his.

”Nevada took me to penguins and that's how we got engaged, you lying piece of shit!!!” You yelled at him.

“….Fuck that’s what he meant. Now he’s used that against me,” Rafael grunted in frustration as you wriggled in his arms. “Y/N you have to believe me you love me, not Nevada. You love me!!”

“No, I DON’T!!!!” You broke free and started to punch him, but he threw you to the ground.

“...You're going to regret that,” You sneered, getting back up.

“I already do!” Rafael began to cry. He didn't want to hurt you, but he had no other choice.

“Alright, break it up,” Chloe stepped in trying to reason with you.

“And who are you? His bitch?” You snarked at her.

“Oh God now what? I'm your best friend, Chloe! We’ve been friends since you moved to the city! forever I helped you get Rafael, remember? All the hijinks we had to go through? Y/N you're my best friend come on, remember!”

“....I don't know what the hell you're talking about bitch, but if you’re against Nevada, you’re against me!” You lunged for Chloe. Unfortunately for you, Chloe had no qualms about kicking your ass. She punched you, making you go down.

“Chloe what the fuck are you doing?!” Rafael yelled angrily at her.

“Wha-- she was trying to kick my ass!” Chloe defended herself.

Well as much as I enjoy this, I'm going to need a status on that transfer, Barba,” Nevada stepped in and helped you to your feet. You started to lunge for Chloe again but Nevada held you back.

“Down girl, you’ll get her next time,” He pulled on the collar of your dress like heeling a dog. You straightened up and walked into his arms. He draped one of them around you as he smiled triumphantly at Chloe and Rafael.

“Well if you would let me work instead of fucking with my emotions and fucking with my fiancé's head I might have some time to do it, tarado!” Rafael barked while glaring at the two of you. “Why are you even doing this, don't you want me to fight for her?”

“Yeah I thought about that,” He nodded, moving his arms around your waist and pulling you back into his chest as you smirked at Rafael.

“And having her on my side actually works out better for me, because you can't hurt me if I have her as my guard dog,” He chuckled, pulling you to face him as he gave you a hungry kiss.

“I swear to God, Nevada… I'll….” Rafael started to charge Nevada, seeing you all over him in person was ten times worse than having to witness it over a face call.

“You'll what?” Nevada challenged him with a laugh. "You gonna call your cop friends on your 'true love?!'” He air quoted true love with a mocking sneer.

“That's right she is my true love; and our love has beat stronger things than your manipulation or mind potions,” He spat as Nevada’s goons began to surround him again in case he tried anything.

"Oh I very much doubt that." He smiled wickedly as he looked into your eyes. "Go on baby, tell him why you chose me" He nodded at Rafael. You nodded back and stepped towards Rafael with hatred in your orange eyes. Nevada thought of the perfect speech to really destroy him.

"Nevada is a real man Barba, he's pleasured me in ways you can't even think of. Our love was fake, you just kept me under your own spell. Nothing we had was actually real, and you're just gonna have to get over this obsession you have with me." You crossed your arms and spoke with absolute disdain.

"No….." Rafael's eyes filled with tears more and more after every word you spoke. "No!" He grabbed you and pulled you towards him. Nevada’s goons started to go after him but Vada put a hand up.

"Ah ah ah, señores. This will be more fun," He grinned.

"Baby come on, look he's...he’s just going to let you go!” Rafael tried to get you to go with him.

"Please, carino…." He put both hands on your face but all he could see was orange in your irises. Now he knew how you must have felt at the church when he didn't remember you. But then he remembered how the real him was deep down inside, screaming to get out. You had to be there too.

“....Rafa…?” Your head began to pound, the orange in your eyes began to flicker as the real you tried to break through.

“Yes, yes Y/N Baby it’s me!” A small hopeful smile crawled across his lips. He started speaking as fast as he could to draw you out more.

"....Carino, remember you told me about your parents, and I told you about my dad, and-- We beat Liv, we've prevailed over anything that tries to tear us apart. And I know you are in there, because I know I was in my body too. Please baby please, oh god please, YN you have to remember!” He pressed his forehead to yours as he begged you with whimpers and tears.

“Baby…”? You bit your lip as you tried like hell to fight the potion. Rafael rubbed your cheeks with his thumbs.

“....If you go back to him now--I'll lose you forever. He’ll just keep using you against me, and I won’t hurt you!” He hugged you tightly, your arms slowly raised to hug him back. Nevada saw what was unfolding and quickly thought to himself “NO. YOU’RE MINE. HURT HIM.”

Suddenly the orange flared in your eyes once again, and you pushed him away from you.

“Well that's really unfortunate for you, douchebag. Because I can,” You took one swift kick to his stomach and he fell over to the ground

“Ohhhhh shit!!!!!” Nevada clapped his hands together happily.

"That was even more delicious than I could have imagined, this magic thing is the best. Thanks for the tip, bruja,” Nevada nodded at Chloe who just glared at him as she helped Rafael up on his feet.

"This isn't over," he growled.

"You're right, you still need to get me those transfers" Nevada reminded him. “....And I think that red head will help you out, I may have 'made up' with her for you," He added with a wink.

“Oh for fucks sake…” Rafael groaned. Now he had lost you and he'd have to break Liv’s heart all over again.

“Now I'd leave before I set my queen loose on you," Nevada cackled.

“Let's go Rafa, we'll figure something out,” Chloe pulled him away from you and out of the warehouse.

Rafael knew you were in there, he just knew it. He was going to get you back somehow.

[thebluelemontree]

Is it wrong to say that Sansa uses an out of sight out of mind coping mechanism? I noticed it because it's what I do a lot. I know some ppl say she rewrites traumatic memories to make the memories bearable but it doesn't make sense. If that was how she coped, wouldn't she have been telling herself lies about Joffrey still in acok? Or found a way to erase/rewrite Marillion's attempt to rape her?

Yes and no. She does that except all the times she doesn’t. ;) I think that characterization is extremely reductionist (and ignores character complexity and  growth) when it’s applied that broadly to every situation Sansa has been in. You have to take these things instance by instance because they aren’t all the same. Sometimes that labeling doesn’t fit at all. In many cases, it feels more like the fandom pathologizing the act of romanticizing or trying to push aside or reframe something unpleasant or even traumatic when that’s just something most human beings do now and then. Some do it more than others, but its all within the realm of typical coping behavior and being older or more educated or more “logical” doesn’t make one immune to it. So I hope you don’t let those interpretations make you feel abnormal or more fallible for identifying with Sansa in that way. Romanticizing doesn’t even have to be about coping at all, but simply expressing desire through daydreams. People imagine being in idealized scenarios with crushes all the time.  

You also hit the nail on the head. Sansa just doesn’t go around making up false narratives about every objectively awful thing that happens to her. In fact, her actual responses to those moments can be a useful basis for comparison when we’re analyzing the unkiss, for example. Misunderstanding the unkiss is usually where a lot of these assumptions stem from. That’s a whole other can of worms in itself. The unkiss is just too long of a discussion to put here, so I just recommend this post as to the reasons why it isn’t about trauma and take a browse through my unkiss tag. It does bear repeating that Sansa factually remembers every scary thing that happened during the Blackwater and why it happened, indicating she has processed it honestly and critically, before any incarnation of the unkiss happens. The unkiss is a mismemory added on to the facts, which began as her being the actor that kissed him first. It’s not a lie to deny the facts or to excuse his behavior. It’s regrettable to her that Sandor was not able to be the person she could rely on to get her out of KL at that time. Nonetheless, this repressed desire is just so strong in her that it manifested in a kiss so real she could remember how it felt after the reality of his leaving KL for good sank in. 

Early AGOT Sansa tended to want to move past unpleasantness rather quickly. Just sweep those red flags under the rug so everything can go back to blissful harmony. Sansa is naturally averse to conflict and just wants her present with the royal family to be smooth sailing into a bright future. Ned had a very similar tendency when it came to concerns over Robert’s true character. He saw things that disturbed him, but he hoped and clung to his idea of Robert anyway. For Sansa, this resulted in some misplaced blame and rewriting events so she could deal with the aftermath. This is mostly seen in her processing the Mycah incident after Lady’s death and how her perception of all the characters involved shifted in varying ways. This is after she knew perfectly well what really happened, because Ned says Sansa had already told him the truth of what Joffrey did while Arya was still missing. However, it would also be unfair to completely chalk this up to Sansa’s idiosyncrasies. We have to put her flip-flopping in the context of the situation as well. She’s also experienced a gutting loss with Lady’s death and the fact that the first blow to her innocence was her father volunteering to put Lady down. She doesn’t have Catelyn to go to with her confusion and hurt, and Ned has largely been silent. She’s also still engaged to Joffrey through all this, this is still a patriarchy, there are political ramifications to speaking against a crown prince, and she doesn’t know how to deal with seeing such cruelty and vindictiveness in her future husband. Especially when he responded to her tender concern and wanting to help him with venom and hate. 

I mean, jeez, she’s 11. I don’t expect an 11 year old to understand how to identify the signs of emotional manipulation or see how this situation can escalate into domestic violence. Just because Sansa can’t articulate what is happening within her relationship with Joffrey, doesn’t mean she has blocked out any notion that Joffrey can turn his anger on her. Part of the reason she misplaces blame on Arya (and rewrites what happened) is because Joffrey turns scornful of Sansa for being a witness to his emasculating shame. He punishes her with the cold shoulder because she didn’t immediately take his side and pretended not to see instead. He regains power through making Sansa feel small and fearful of his moods. 

“He had not spoken a word to her since the awful thing had happened, and she had not dared to speak to him.” -- Sansa II, AGOT.

Sansa looked at him and trembled, afraid that he might ignore her or, worse, turn hateful again and send her weeping from the table. -- Sansa II, AGOT.

This is coming from someone who is supposed to love her and someone she will spend the rest of her life with. To fix things, she must be unequivocally on Joffrey’s side going forward or suffer the consequences, which we can see happening as her story completely flips over breakfast sometime later. This is not saying Sansa is fully exonerated from not supporting her sister when she needed her, but that it’s understandable how she arrived at this point. Even when things start to get really bad after Ned’s arrest, Sansa still holds out some hope that she can appeal to Joffrey’s (and Cersei’s) love for her to get him to be merciful. Is it really her fault she believed a part of Joffrey really loved her (and thus was reachable by her pleas) if he also heavily love bombed her and treated her like she was the most special girl in the world? Love bombing is a classic feature of the seduction phase leading up to abuse.  

So we can see Sansa does ignore truths and rewrite events sometimes and her personality is a factor; however, the context surrounding it matters a lot. Post Ned’s execution, Sansa does a full 180 regarding Joffrey and Cersei.

Sansa stared at him, seeing him for the first time. He was wearing a padded crimson doublet patterned with lions and a cloth-of-gold cape with a high collar that framed his face. She wondered how she could ever have thought him handsome. His lips were as soft and red as the worms you found after a rain, and his eyes were vain and cruel. "I hate you," she whispered. -- Sansa VI, AGOT.

Once she had loved Prince Joffrey with all her heart, and admired and trusted his mother, the queen. They had repaid that love and trust with her father's head. Sansa would never make that mistake again. -- Sansa I, ACOK. 

"A monster," she whispered, so tremulously she could scarcely hear her own voice. "Joffrey is a monster. He lied about the butcher's boy and made Father kill my wolf. When I displease him, he has the Kingsguard beat me. He's evil and cruel, my lady, it's so. And the queen as well." -- Sansa I, ASOS. 

There’s also her conscious efforts to push away thoughts of her dead family and Jeyne Poole, but she states why she does that. It’s traumatic, the tears start flowing uncontrollably, and she is desperately trying to avoid falling into another suicidal depression. Her survival in KL depends on her holding it together and appearing loyal and obedient to Joffrey. Mourning her loved ones would imply to Joffrey she is plotting treason. Besides, she knows that even if she did ask Cersei or LF about Jeyne, she has no reason to believe they’d do anything but lie to her face in a patronizing way. There’s no point being plagued with wondering what the truth might be when she can’t do anything about it. Still, she prayed for Jeyne wherever she might be. She genuinely thought Arya had made it to WF on the ship and was safe at least until she got word of her brothers’ deaths and her home being sacked by the Iron Born, though there was initially a touch of projection and fantasizing about Arya being free while she remains captured. As of Feast, she believes she is the last Stark left alive and she has no one but Littlefinger to help her. So while she is suppressing her grief, it’s done with good reason, and it’s not being replaced with any false narratives to cope. 

We also cannot ignore that her relationship to Sandor Clegane has instilled in her an appreciation for the un-sugarcoated truth now that she has experienced betrayal and injustice first hand. In his own way, he’s encouraged her to listen to her own inner bullshit detector. The rose-tinted glasses have become a lot more clear compared to where she started. This is a newly learned skill though, and her self-confidence has been wrecked by internalized verbal abuse. She’s also been left on her own to figure out people’s intentions by herself, which runs parallel to her mounting desperation to get out of KL as Joffrey’s violence escalates. Developing a touch more of a jaded, skeptical side does sometimes clash with her enduring idealism and faith in other people (like with the Tyrells). This struggle is not a bad thing. The goal isn’t to become as cynical as the Hound, but to arrive at an earned optimism that has been tempered by wisdom and practical experience.

Her situation with Littlefinger is much more challenging than anything she faced in KL. He moves her where he wants her to go with complex web of lies, manipulation, grooming, isolation, coercion, dependence, guilt and shame. Her safety and desire to go home are tightly bound to being complicit in his lies and criminal activities. She feels indebted to him for getting her out of KL, even though his methods push her past her boundaries and force her to compromise her moral integrity. The thing is, there are things Sansa does know about LF, but she doesn’t seem to be ready to try and put the puzzle pieces together. She’s not daring to ask probing questions about Lysa’s reference to the “tears” and Jon Arryn or about the possible dangers of Maester Colemon prescribing sweetsleep for Robert’s convulsions. While the subject of Jeyne’s fate is still one she doesn’t want to revisit, somewhere in her mind she does know LF took custody of her friend. If it feels like this is somewhat of a regression back to her early AGOT self, there’s probably some truth to that; however, it’s perfectly okay for positive character arcs to be an imperfect progress. There can be relapses, regressions, setbacks, missteps, and misguided actions. All that growth isn’t lost. Everything she knows is just stored in the back of her mind, not forgotten completely. The general trend line moves her toward successfully confronting Littlefinger with the truth when GRRM is ready to pull the trigger. She’s definitely aware of Littlefinger lying to her more than she lets on and she knows his help is not out of the kindness of his heart, but motivated by what he wants her to be to him. But it’s not like she has the option to go anywhere else, does she? She’s a wanted criminal with a bounty on her head and has no other friend or ally in the Vale she can trust with the truth of her identity. Confronting LF without any means of neutralizing his power over her isn’t the smartest thing to do when he’s shown her he can literally get away with multiple murders. Again, it’s not just her personality that makes her hesitant to pull back the veil and face the horrible truth head on. The outside forces pressuring her perceptions and behavior cannot be discounted either.    

[tabloidtoc]

National Examiner, April 12

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Mark Harmon quitting NCIS

Page 2: Stars Who Rock Around the Clock -- they believe in the healing power of crystals -- Naomi Campbell, Shirley MacLaine, Adele, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, Uma Thurman

Page 3: Debra Messing, Goldie Hawn and Kate Hudson, Megan Fox, Katy Perry, Gisele Bundchen

Page 4: Eddie Murphy's roles and costumes

Page 6: George Clooney is turning 60 in May, and he says being an older dad to toddlers has its benefits -- his son isn't ever going to feel competitive with him and he'll be gumming his bread by the time he'd feel competitive with him, jokes the Oscar-winning actor, whose twins Ella and Alexander turn 4 in June -- George is well aware that growing up with two highly accomplished parents (his wife Amal Clooney is a successful human rights lawyer) can put a lot of pressure on a kid and that's why the couple is already guiding Ella and Alexander with strong values and kind hearts because George says it's their job to make sure that they care about people and that they challenge people in power and look out for people who don't have power and those are the things he was raised with -- the known prankster is also passing the practical joke tradition down to the next generation and he taught Alexander to take a piece of banana, chew it up and then spit it into a napkin, then stand next to him mom, pretend to blow his nose into it and look down until Mama looks at it, then eat it

Page 7: Partridge Family star Shirley Jones turned 87, and she's brimming over with gratitude for her wonderful life that's been chock-full of extraordinary experiences -- she says you have to have a good time and enjoy life to the fullest and before you know it you'll be 87 -- Shirley has three sons (her stepson David Cassidy died in 2017) and 13 grandchildren

Page 8: Take your etiquette test for tea with Queen Elizabeth

Page 9: Brain foods that may help prevent dementia

* Study says new drug slows Alzheimer's

Page 10: Jennifer Garner recently opened up about her real feelings on her body -- she's 48 and single and has three children with ex-husband Ben Affleck: daughters Violet and Seraphina and son Samuel -- in a recent interview, she admitted that her body has changed a lot since having three kids and she doesn't mind one little bit, even though she was hurt when a friend hinted she may be expecting again, saying there are some women whose bodies just, no matter how many babies they have, they bounce right back to that slim-hipped, no stomach and she has so many girlfriends who have that physique and she's so happy for them, but she's not one of them and she can work really hard and she can be really fit and she will still look like a woman who's had three babies and she always will

Page 11: 6 stomach symptoms you should never ignore -- catch problems before the become deadly

Page 12: After more than two decades, James Brolin says he's discovered the way to keep his marriage to Barbra Streisand going strong: negotiation -- it's taken two marriages and 22 years for him to figure it out and he and his wife have gotten so close being locked down together -- his mother was the sweetest person so he never really learned to negotiate with women but now he knows if you sit down and talk about a situation, you can work it out

Page 14: Dear Tony, America's Top Psychic Healer -- don't make snap judgments; you may lose the perfect mate -- Tony predicts a very hot summer coming and a lot more street crime

Page 15: Folks getting their COVID-19 vaccinations at the Berkshire Community College in Massachusetts got a shocking treat: a mini-concert from world-famous cellist Yo-Yo Ma -- while waiting out his 15-minute observation period, the musician sat down to play a socially distant symphony for his fellow inoculees

Page 16: Duchess Kate is never seen without a purse, but what exactly does she keep inside it? There's quite a history between royal women and their handbags: Princess Diana used her clutch bag to cover her cleavage from prying photographers, Queen Elizabeth moves her handbag from one arm to the other to signal to her staff when she's bored of chatting with someone, and Kate carries her bag in her left hand so she can keep her right hand free to greet and shake hands with guests and she holds her bag in front of her when shaking hands might be awkward -- according to royal protocol pre-pandemic, Kate must extend her hand first for another person to shake hands with her, so if she prefers to just smile instead of touching other folks, she uses her clutch to do that -- author Marcia Moody who wrote Kate: A Biography, says the duchess always carries four must-have items: in her small clutch, she carries a compact mirror, a handkerchief, blotting paper and lip balm and every now and then, if she's going to attend a tennis match, for example, Kate will carry a pair of sunglasses -- unlike Queen Elizabeth, whose purses come from a company called Launer, the duchess favors different brands, but mostly a company called Mulberry -- nowadays with three small children, the mom gravitates toward midsize bags with handles because she's got to take more items with her like a handy bunch of tissues, good for wiping little noses and faces, and also takes her camera along

Page 18: William Shatner confesses that when he starred in Star Trek during the mid-60s, he had no idea it would become a worldwide phenomenon still popular today -- Shatner, who turned 90 in March, says it's unimaginable and it's all beyond anybody's imagination or ability to repeat and the greatest thing about being the captain of the Enterprise for three years was his relationship with the cast and the roles were written so well

Page 19: Brandy is a one-in-a million cat because those are the odds she'd ever be found again after she went missing 15 years ago -- when Charles got the phone call from a California animal shelter that his missing pet has been found, he could scarcely believe his ears and the Los Angeles man was skeptical and thought it must be a mistake but he had made sure the two-month-old kitten had a microchip and sure enough, the malnourished stray they found was his Brandy -- Charles did break down and cry because he thought about all of the years he lost from her and when he picked her up, she started to purr and it was very emotional

Page 20: Mark Harmon finally lured wife Pam Dawber out of retirement to star alongside him on NCIS, but the pairing will be short-lived because he's leaving the show after 18 hit seasons -- the 69-year-old star is finally fed up with the backbreaking hours, endless rehearsals, and feuds with cast and crew, and plans to ride off into the sunset with Pam and retire to the couple's Montana Ranch -- Mark's contract is up after season 18, and he's agonized over whether to sign a new one and he's being offered the moon and the stars to come back for a few more seasons, but he says his heart just isn't in it and Mark has faced problems on the set over the past few years and he feels his age, he just doesn't need the aggravation anymore -- NCIS recently teased a possible departure of his character Leroy Gibbs when the special agent commander was suspended for assaulting and nearly killing a suspect but despite that, Harmon insists Gibbs not be killed off so he can leave the door open for a possible return

Page 22: Legendary actor Michael Caine just turned 88 and he's still going strong, starring in an upcoming comedy Best Sellers and says he knows he's old but he doesn't feel old, not in his head, where it matters

Page 24: They say money doesn't buy happiness, but what do people spend their money on that can buy happiness? You don't need millions of dollars to afford the things that happy people buy to stay that way and studies show that anything over $75,000 a year in income is gravy, which means yachts, jewels, second homes and art collections are not at all required -- the best thing to drop your cash on is experiences and doing is better than having and in other words, an object you own will never give you the consistent pleasure of an experience that creates good memories that live on forever -- also the best experiences are the ones that involve other people like having a picnic with family, going rafting with pals, or even just walking and talking with an exercise buddy

Page 25: Freshen Your Fridge -- make a clean start with this 5-step plan

Page 26: Tony's Mystic World -- may the force be with you -- the life force can be drained out of you by fear or worry

Page 28: Sensational Snaps From Around the World -- photo contest captures amazing sights

Page 31: When to trash it -- the useful lifespan of refrigerated food

Page 32: It's been 40 years since Marilu Henner starred on the hit sitcom Taxi, but the great memories and wonderful co-stars are always on her mind because she's still pals with them -- they always stayed in touch with each other and never lost touch and do a Taxi Zoom every two months and they're all very current with each other and they have a text chain as well and they're in contact every week -- Marilu is close with cast members Tony Danza, Judd Hirsch, Danny DeVito, Christopher Lloyd and Carol Kane

Page 33: Garth Brooks is overjoyed wife Trisha Yearwood has finally bounced back from her bout with COVID-19 -- she seems to be 100 percent, according to Garth, and at the end there during fatigue she got real impatient, really kind of mean and sassy and he thought well, she's back to herself -- after announcing in February that Trisha had the coronavirus and Garth said he had tested negative

Page 40: The grass is always greener when you use these simple gardening tips

* Avoid cat-astrophe -- the right way to add a stray

Page 42: 10 things you never knew about Glenn Close -- the wildly successful actress turned 74 in March

Page 44: Eyes on the Stars -- Sylvester Stallone and wife Jennifer Flavin leave a Florida hotel (picture), Jane Seymour is still looking on the bright side even as the world continues to weather the pandemic, one year after the death of Kenny Rogers his family thanked fans as they honored his life, Sharon Stone is dishing dirt about her Hollywood past in her recently released memoir like one moviemaker who told her to have sex with a male co-star to improve their on-screen chemistry, 28-year-old twins Lady Amelia and Lady Eliza Spencer who are the nieces of Princess Diana recently stepped out in South Africa as bridesmaids for fellow high society girl Leila Osato, director Christopher Columbus pooh-poohed internet rumors about the existence of an NC-17 cut of Mrs. Doubtfire but he did confirm there's an unreleased R-rated version

Page 45: Good Morning America co-host Cecilia Vega mugs it up for the camera on the morning show (picture), Gretta Monahan gets out of a car (picture), longtime GMA veteran Robin Roberts displays her ever-present sunny side on the set (picture), the Hollywood Hills home of Johnny Depp recently had some uninvited guests when a man was spotted loitering by the property's pool but ran off after being confronted by a neighbor and not much later Johnny's security team called police about another unwanted visitor who had taken a shower and helped himself to the actor's booze, Elsa Pataky has been married to Chris Hemsworth for 10 years and says patience and communication and understanding are what help their relationship be successful

Page 46: A Texas man has helped thousands of people by donating his blood platelets a staggering 962 times over the past 37 years

Page 47: Celebrity Weddings Gone Wrong -- Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively, Cameron Diaz and Benji Madden, Nicky Hilton and James Rothschild, Chrissy Teigen and John Legend, Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson, Freddie Prinze Jr. and Sarah Michelle Gellar, Katherine Heigl and Josh Kelley

[purplerose244]

Thinking journal for season 12 Prime Empire 😎😎😎 (1/2)

So, I'm keeping this during all of season 12 to put down my thoughts as they appear. It's mostly for not ranting every single time a new episode comes out so please don't mind me too much 😅 I'm following the English release so please no spoilers 😙

I'm gonna split it in two, since apparently the season has 16 episodes. So this is the first part, enjoy my rambling 💜💜

It's the 30th of March and here we go!

IN GENERAL

I'm so, SO HAPPY, we have a theme for this season. For my experience apparently silly themes (tech ninja, ghosts, pirates) had brought very surprising results so I'm SO DOWN FOR THIS 😍😍

It seems that they fixed the mood, there is a specific mystery and a specific mission to follow. I like it too

THE NEW WHIP IS DOPE AS ALWAYS

I'm really glad there are plenty of references to past episodes, comebacks are my jam

The only thing that still kinda bothers me is the length of the episodes. It's not all bad, I just think the 20 minutes format was better. One thing is splitting 20 in 10 minutes, another is putting together 11 minutes of important stuff. Doesn't bother me too much, I just wish there was more time for my favorite show 🤷‍♀️

WOULD YOU LIKE TO ENTER PRIME EMPIRE?

Is it normal for me to feel really old after they made the "what is a VCR?" joke? Like, I'm a uni student so still pretty young, but I lived through the transition from that to the DVD so... eh, I laughed anyway👵

Jay is smart, I really believe he is. Yet I saw him putting a possibly corrupted motherboard into a legendary game randomly found into a villain's lair, and I was like "Of course he did that, I love you you dumb*ss" raising my glass of juice towards him 😎

Okay, I'm down for this Lloyd. I'm down for a season with Lloyd being creeped out just because, being silly, just a ninja helping his friends and- (remembers there's a Harumi avatar in the sets) I'M NOT READY

The ending was actually nicely creepy. Cool nods in approval

DYER ISLAND

THAT INTRO THOUGH, THAT WAS EPIC! Love the techno sounds, love the clear gaming connection, I rate it 10/HECK YEAH LONG LIVE THE FOLD

I was scared about how the shorts were supposed to play along with the season, but it looks fine so far with the mechanic and later for Scott. Good 👍

Ah, Fist to Face, that game came all over from the nostalgic season 1. That's what I'm talking about 😎

So they just associated that Unagami is probably Dyer's avatar like that? Like sure, I thought about it, but it looks a little rushed. Mm, I wonder if there's something more behind it?

LEVEL 13

Cyrus Borg is back and he TALKS!!! Finally, he gets some action! Go tech dad!

I'm so happy he referenced the Digiverse, I would have been very disappointed if he hadn't. Time flies Borg...

Not gonna lie, I thought the next to follow up Jay's spot as best in videigames was going to be Kai or Lloyd. It's not disappointing though, since pretty much all the ninja have been seen playing, and to be honest I like the implication that Cole and Jay probably played a lot together. As bruiseshipping or as BrOTP, I still love them together no matter what 💙🖤💙🖤

Ooooohhhhh, that's why Zane and Pixal are left behind. It makes sense, sure, but I don't understand the implication of the plan: they saw Dyer entering Prime Empire, so why looking for him in real life? Mm, maybe they will investigate about his life and what happened... PIXANE ON THE CASE 😍

Already saw Prime Empire's world in the shorts, of course it looks DOPE, still very happy to finally being there!

SUPERSTAR ROCKIN' JAY

I don't know why, but Kai questioning the double jump made me laugh. Also poor him, he just got his powers back from last season and they're already gone again 😂

And of course. Them. Wow. It must be the most amazing and CURSED thing I've ever seen so far, the League of Jay 🤯 I'm so happy they exist and they freaking use past seasons' suits!!! Awesome!!! Never thought I was going to see Jay's old plain haircut again... yeah, he got better with the curly one, but I'm feeling nostalgic 🤷‍♀️

Their nick are histerical omg, Jaybird, Dee-Jay, Jaywalkin, I'm loving this way more than I should 😂 Also they freaking screamed "JAY-NJA GOO!!!" and I don't know what to do with that, it's too great for me to comprehend 👏👏

And then, THIS happened:

Your Honor, I would like to confirm this as THE MOST SECRET DREAM I'VE EVER HAD FOR THIS SHOW FINALLY COMING TRUE!!! A NINJA FROM NINJAGO DOING THE NARUTO RUN!!! 🤯🤯🤯 Done, I'm done, conclude the season, this is more than enough for me 😍

First Kai gets hit and fall from a building, DYING, then Lloyd gets desperate for his brother (MY BROTP 💚❤💚❤), then Kai respawns and Lloyd looks so relieved and Kai is all panting while slowly realizing it's a game and MY HEART CAN'T HANDLE THIS MUCH OKAY???

As a very passionate Kai fangirl I always expect the cringy moment, it really is inevitable for my favorite hothead. I love that idiot so much it's unbelievable, even if it's an absolute and costant suffering 😅 Holy Garmadon it was painful seeing his VERY slow realization that in this game you only have four lives

... SO HE HAS ONE NOW!?! NINJAGO CREW YOU ALREADY KILLED ZANE, NYA AND LLOYD ONCE AT THE END OF A SEASON, DON'T YOU DARE PLAY WITH ME AGAIN 😱😱😱

Okay, I did not expect to hear about Mr. Cuddly Wamp ever again since Hands of Time and BOY if I'm happy it was actually a password, I love this show 😂

SCOTT FINALLY!!! YESS!!! 😍😍😍

Okay, for as long as it is not debunked, I will hold onto the Scott is Jay's brother/twin theory. I'm sorry but: his jacket has dragons AND lightnings on it, they have very similar skin in avatar mode, he said he was waiting for him in the short, he could very well have his same hair under cap and hoodie and he's a mechanic too. I know, I know, they could have the same skin because Scott helped him for the avatar, and there might be shadier reason behind the 'I was waiting for you' thing, and there are tons of good mechanics in Ninjago... STILL HOW COOL WOULD THAT BE??? 😍

SCOTT HAS ONE LIFE POINT TOO??? NO! NOOO!!! NOOOOOOO!!! Don't you dare appear and steal my heart only to die at the end of the season, come on!! 😭

So for now it seems like he just wants to survive. Can we actually confirm he's an avatar and not an NPC? I mean he could be, but I don't see the point of an NPC self aware of his life points. Idk, maybe I'm overthinking this 🤷‍♀️

Lol, Kai is the only one weirded out by the Jay-con all around him. Probably because he hasn't heard from his fans since Skybound 😅 (I'M STILL HERE MY FLAME BABE, ILY ❤❤❤)

And in all of his glory, freaking Superstar Rockin' Jay!!! 😎😎 Okay, I loved the design since the first time I saw it, but it looks possibly even better in the show 😍😍😍 And Jay looks absolutely adorable in it, and he's got a guitar, and he was waiting for his friends, and he hugs them (I'm weak for LEGO hugs for some reason) and he is so happy and AAAHHH 💙💙💙💙💙

I'm very curious about how Scott will play into the situation, clearly he will provide some kind of insight about Prime Empire. I can't wait to know more about him!! 😍

I AM OKINO

I did not expect this when I saw this Okino guy in the trailer... and I'm so happy I was surprised, I love him 👌

And he's voiced by Alessandro Juliani?? HECK YEAH!!! With all the hype about the DnD 13th season, and consequentially the knight theme, I really miss Nexo Knights and having Aaron's VA around makes me happy... any hope to have Giles Panton as well? I miss Clay the most 💙💙

This is what I'm talking about, the game theme needs this stuff! I was already happy to see life points, double jumps and respawns, but this? The NPC guide? Awesome 👍 It's nice to see the take on the matter, the guide seeing so many players getting killed, first because they did not listen, then because they were actually just unlucky. The touchy matter I always expect watching Ninjago 👏👏

At least I THINK he's an NPC? For now I don't really see a way of knowing, and it doesn't look like it matters. He didn't show life points so maybe? Does this mean he can't die? I have questions people

Which brings me to the cube thingies. That's what happens to the dead players? I mean, I would understand if they just become pixels, but there's also the drone that takes the datas every time. Idk, feels like there's more behind it. And honestly? It looks like great material for angst, like one of the ninja dies but then they discover they just need to get where Unagami stores all of the players! I hope it's something like this!

They designs of the players are really cool, I already saw them in the other episodes, but seeing them this close just confirmed it. Between this and Jay's awesome avatar, I see lots of great cosplay ideas coming 😍 I wonder when will Kai and Lloyd use their avatars, and why would they since I'm guessing Jay did for disguise and to distinguish himself from his fans

PLEASE TELL ME WE'LL SEE SCOTT SOON, I ALREADY MISS HIM!!! 💙💙💙 I have too many theories about that tech dude, I'm so excited about who he might turn out to be!

I was a little skeptical about the new ninja suits, but seeing them in the show convinced me, very cool! Especially on Nya 💕💕💕

THE GLITCH

Alright, Okino is indeed an NPC. Cool the fact that at first he could not understand the fact that he was in a game, but when reality changed he was forced to. Welcome into the crew! 😙

I'm kinda worried about it though, either they will shut down the game and he will stay inside or he will sacrifice for them. He's a very loyal samurai, I can see that happening and I'm SCARED

I WAS SWEATING BULLETS AT THE AMBUSH!!! I 100% saw it coming, we all freaking saw it coming, even the ninja did but where like 'we can walk and die or we can risk and die so might as well'. But still, my babies DYING and respawning so fast was not pretty 😱😱

Nya got the scariest death until now in my opinion, holy Garmadon Dyer DOES have a twisted mind...

Seeing Kai so scared of being in a new situation and with one HP reminds me A LOT of the Digiverse, and that's actually a nice touch. Give him a cellphone, hothead is a social media expert, but put him in a game and... huuhhh... 😅

Have I mentioned I love the ninja's new emoji masks??

BECAUSE I DO!!! 😂😂😂😂

So Unagami knows about them trying to stop him and he sent the rat people because of it. Considering how little we know about this guy, I'm wondering what we are about to discover

Alright, going to the next challenge, very curious about this adventure. So... beware of the rats, ninja? Still not sure what I think about the rats 😅

THE CLIFFS OF HYSTERIA

I would like to say Okino is the edgiest character of the show I've ever seen... but I've seen MORRO. But still poor guy, he got a case of the Matrix

Oooohhhh, the major question in videogames: better go grinding for more money to get the better stuff but while losing lots of time, or get the least expensive just to go on with the story but definitely risking to lose lives?

Ah there we go, so the energy cubes mean something! Also reference to the Sushimi guy of the set (gosh that name, I can't 😂). So do people actually die in Prime Empire or they are just kidnapped kinda? Can the ninja just bring back? ANGST POTENTIAL

Cole please don't die please don't die please don't die for the love of Garmadon please don't die somebody help-

HOLY FSM KAI I MEANT HELP FROM SOMEONE WITH MORE THAN ONE LIFE DON'T DO THAT BE CAREFUL PLEASE I FREAKING LOVE YOU YOU RECKLESS HOTHEAD ❤❤❤

Nya giving Kai a sweet look after seeing her brother is okay, that's what I live for 😍

So apparently Unagami is trying to build some kind of device using the energy cubes of the dead players (sounds kinda creepy like this 😱) to create some kind of portal? To Ninjago? I don't understand, if Unagami is Milton Dyer then why this? Just to bring his army and conquer? I mean I guess, sounds a little simple though. Then again, if it turns out it's not Dyer, it could be Unagami wanting to be real and get into his creator's world? Mm...

I like the message, having the ability to choose your own path. Very fitting for a game themed season, I hope it gets explored even more!

More for the "I love the ninja emoji masks of this season"'s compilation 😂😂😂

THE MAZE OF THE RED DRAGON

Duuuude, Jay being good at mazes comes all the way from Possession, the Tomb of the First Spinjitzu Master! 😍 ... or maybe I just rewatch this show too much... could be both really 😅

Unagami is NASTY!

Confirmed the thing about going into the real world, what scares me is how much powers Unagami seems to actually possess. Like, can he do the block thingy whenever he wants? Just straight up pause and do whatever? Wow...

Jay being extra 😎

I mean, of course he is, he's got better statics! 😂 I like how he seems so focused and in charge, I still hope we see more of him... and Scott... WHERE IS SCOTT???

I love dragons, this metal one is cute 😍

So now we have two ronin: a samurai looking for a path on his own in a digital world... and a shady guy named Ronin 😛 Total respect for Okino, he really showed the values he believes in. No matter he was programmed his way, I hope he finds what he's looking for. Better come back for the final battle!

One Keytana down, two more to go. I know one is the price of the race, while the last one... I don't really know.

More of the masks because I love them 😂 Here we have Vegeta Lloyd and Kawai Cole ✌✌

[thedispatched]

Ok so I finally read the soompi post defending Lucas and I wanted to share my thoughts:

They presented some strong points, but their bias is also pretty obvious and they always land with such bold assumptions that just don't make sense. It makes me a bit skeptical.

Anyway, I'll start with the information they got from the ooooshiiim account and the twitter prediction account:

The user ids they represented are def real, that can be easily confirmed by going to websites that translate user handles to ids.

But them comparing one manga character to lucas and assuming that somehow that disproves OP 1's claims is hilarious LMAO. The description of the fictional character would literally fit most male idols, idk how they went like "oh this guy severely resembles lucas, another evidence yay!"

As with the Instagram account, I can't seem to find it?? If, say, it's really OP, did they happen to find the soompi post and decided to delete the Instagram account/change the username? This is also poses the possibility that the Instagram account isn't actually real, but I guess we'll never know.

I also wish the soompi lumi provided a link to the account and some more elaboration on how their cyber investigator found it through the twitter acc's digital footprints. The manga part is very elaborate but most else is just pretty vague which I find a bit questionable?

The said fabrication of the chat records: doesn't the gaps depend on what version of WeChat it is? I searched for "wechat screenshots" and some gaps can indeed be as big as the ones in the chat records.

It would also have been better if they highlighted the gap inconsistencies/misalignments they are pointing out because personally I don't see it(but maybe it's just my eyes bluffing).

I don't have much to say about the schedule parts since I don't follow their schedules closely and I'm too lazy to search for it, but I guess what those fans said do make sense.

The voice messages: I don't have much to say either since I don't speak korean. But last time I heard the alleged voice message and the bubble one lumis are using as proof, they didn't sound alike. But then again, I don't know korean.

The sasaeng photos: I guess it also kinda makes sense. But I feel like the fan who said they got the same photo OP 1 had provided should have just showed a screenshot of her conversation with the sasaeng she claims to be selling them, I mean, the photo is already out, so what difference of not specifying which photo it is/not showing the screenshots of her conversation with the sasaeng would make?

The ring part: the soompi lumi's argument also seems pretty valid. It really does not look like his finger.

The OP 2 part: I don't know mandarin or cantonese so I can't really comment on the nuances the fans are trying to point out. I don't understand the red boxes though, were those part of the original photos OP 2 provided or are they highlights of the misalignments lumis are trying to point out?

The OP 3 part: Oh they can definitely be a guy, but it's also possible that they didn't use their actual gender in the account(I myself do that all the time, for privacy reasons). But once again, we will never know which is true.

The photo is indeed very questionable. Why is the background blurred? Why are there plushies everywhere? Why is there a reflection of what seems like a man in the glass when they're supposedly alone? But there seems to be a door and a small hallway reflected on the glass too? It looks clean and hotel-like. And the one who took the photo seemed to be sitting right besides him based on the photo's angle. If it's taken by a sasaeng staff as fans have claimed, how did the sasaeng staff secretly took a photo like that while literally sitting besides lucas and with other people around them(like the "man in the glass") without the other people in the dorm questioning what the fuck is that staff doing? But another explanation I can think of(if the photo really came from a sasaeng staff) is that a member took the photo(with Lucas being aware of it) and somehow the sasaeng staff managed to get it?

With OP 3's chat records, again I don't see the gap mistakes or misalignment they are pointing out, I again tried to look at WeChat examples on the internet and the difference between the size of the messages and the dates is a normal thing, so is the gap between 2 messages vs the gap at bottom of the chat. And the "difference" between the two s's in lucas's username they are pointing out is honestly ridiculous. The photo is taken from an asymmetrical angle, of course the sizes would look unequal.

The sleeping photos: the plushies' textures don't look the same, dorm plushie looks more rough while the plushie Lucas is sleeping with looks softer and fuzzier. And if it was taken by a sasaeng in the wayv dorm as fans have claimed, how the hell is the sasaeng within such a close proximity? There's so many people in the dorm and I doubt they'd be all asleep at that time to not notice that a sasaeng is right besides their sleeping member literally photographing him.

The jacket and photo receipts: Oh I've seen this on another article. I'm convinced with the debunking of the jacket part, and receipts are everywhere in the internet. I guess it isn't impossible that OP 3 might have just took the receipts somewhere online.

OP 4's surfing video: Yes, same pose, but different angles? That does not look exactly the same as the one he showed in his socials. But that black spot is definitely questionable.

OP 4's WeChat records: Oh another questionable one. Especially the imbalance in the color value. But once I again I think it would have been better if they provided the links to the other debunk posts they included because man I can't see the cutting traces in the chats that they are pointing out.

OP 1's second post: again I think the difference in wechat date layouts depend on the version? And why did most koreans themselves didn't question the difference in OP 1's wechat? Like if korean wechat really don't look like that, wouldn't they point it out?

"their account creation dates and account activity all falls within the same time period." Um no?? 2015, 2019, 2018 are same time periods??

In conclusion, as I said before, I think the soompi lumi presented strong points that really make you question the credibility of the allegations, but their intense bias towards lucas makes them quite questionable, too. And the way they treat every debunk post like the absolute divine truth is pretty off-putting.

I'm convinced not everything in the allegations are true. I'm just curious about the severity of his actions. Maybe he dated them, but maybe he wasn't an asshole? But if that's the case why would they try to ruin his image if he treated them right? Or maybe he really was an asshole but some of the story isn't true? Ah I'm still so confused of what to think but I believe there has to be some truth in the story, but just how bad is the truth???

thank you for sending me your thoughts! it's always interesting to see what other people think. (and sorry for the late reply!)

i'm not gonna say much as i've talk about my thoughts on the post already.

i agree about the manga, it's absolutely ridiculous how comparing one manga character to lucas debunks their claims. that's just one example of one of the far fetched assumptions that made me lean more towards not believing the article.

part of me also wondered if they created the ig account for their article but like you said, we’ll never know.

even if it doesn’t look like his finger in the messages, I’m pretty sure he mentioned winwin in the texts ??

I know some people blur the background of photos for either aesthetic, or mostly for privacy reasons.

I honestly don’t know how people are seeing a man in the reflection. It’s a literally blob. You can’t make out any (person) shape.

The jacket and receipts is the only thing I took away from that article that I actually kind of believed. I talked about this with another anon. That is super easy to fake, but the photos were also originally blurry so a “blur” around the words would be hard to solidify as evidence unless the photo is in ultra hd or something lol. But to me this is the most believable to be fake.

I once saw a twitter thread pointing out how the messages weren’t photoshopped and explained why they looked “misaligned” or whatever but I can’t remember what it said exactly besides auto translations. I won’t be able to find it again because it was so long ago :/

Someone can correct me if I’m wrong but wechat is more of a China thing? Like not a lot of people outside of China/non-Chinese use it. You’re right about why Koreans didn’t point it out, but I don’t think they’d know if they don’t use it ??

You asked a lot of questions and pointed out a lot of things that are something to think about, but I don’t think anyone has a clear answer unless you have an extreme bias.

I also wondered the severity of his actions. I think this whole thing is a mix of truth and lies. We all want to know the truth and the worst part is we never will. Like you said, how bad is the truth?

(I might edit this later and add some stuff 😅)

[ragnarssons]

Am I the only one who believe that the 5 years time jump won't happen? Their calculations are always wrong. It doesn't fit the narrative. The show'd lose the momentum. Ik some fans are excited bc they think it's painful but it's not even good angst. That would ruin BC. It's not romantic and we wouldn't get an iconic reunion. 5 years is not the same as 3 months. I know it's a theory taken as canon because the script mentions something like that but analyzing the show I can't see that happening.

No you’re not the only one. I know that I’ve made a post about that already and a lot of people reblogged it because, yes, in my mind, it would change a lot of things. Let’s remind us that so far, the show’s timeline is no longer than a year. I mean, as I said, look at Arrow; yes, we’ve never had a “before island” season, but Oliver changed A LOT in five years, and it changed EVER SINGLE ONE of his relationships, he literally changed himself as a person. I know, we can still tell he’s been through some shit and all… but tell me that on The 100, the characters wouldn’t go through shit for FIVE WHOLE YEARS? Yeah, no, not happening. So there are plenty of materials allowing the writers to completely change the narrative of their show, and the relationships that much that they wouldn’t mean anything we know, anymore. And yes, in my mind, that includes Bellarke. I don’t care if, at the end of the journey, they find each other again or anything like that, I LOVE their relationship as it is today, and I don’t want it to change because out of nowhere, the writers would separate them for a wayyyyyy longer time that they’ve been together through these four seasons. And don’t get me started like “Clarke would at least, have the time to move on” la-di-da, she already did, with Niylah, when she sought confort with her. And honestly, let’s bring back the show to what it is, CL lasted for two weeks tops, you don’t need five years to go over that. Anywayyyy, so far in the narrative, nothing indicates that ANYTHING written on the scripts will happen, honestly. Why would they go to space? To escape the radiation? They already have a bunker and the rocket they have, has no fuel! To create Nightblood? Apparently Clarke is ALREADY a Nightblood, without them having to go to space, all they need is to duplicate the thing and that’s it. What else?? Because eight more people in a rocket would make THAT BIG of a difference compared to the 1200 spots in the bunker?? And don’t get me go again about the science of it all, five years will NEVER be enough to come back because the radiations levels dropped or something. That’s physically IMPOSSIBLE and I’d just roll my eyes so hard, honestly. Idk, maybe it seems like JRoth and the writers aren’t ready to accept the fact that once these characters go into their bunker, it’s FOREVER, for the rest of their lives, the rest of the show. They’d need a 200 years time-jump if they want to allow the characters to go outside again. So what? Will half of the characters be dead of old age without any background because of a dumb time jump we’d never see on screen? LOL. Honestly… I’ve seen people say that the scripts aren’t what’s happening in the finale, people who say they have sources and all. Up until now, I’m ready to believe them over these theories. For example, Marie in an interview, mentionned Octavia and the fact that she would find something else because going to space = prison, to her. And that was around the time the script was “leaked”: yet, the writers didn’t say shit, there was nothing about that, and so far in the show (and at least up till ep10) there is no mention of the characters going to space. Meaning that Marie would have “accidently” dropped a HUGE spoiler about the very end of the season, just like that? Umm allow me to be skeptical, actors are supposed to know best. And I mean, if they pull another solution, another rocket, another stack of fuel out of their asses in the last three episodes of the season, I’m gonna lose my mind over this dumbfest. I can’t believe they would do that… I hope they won’t. As I said, in my mind, they totally shitted on their narrative with the three months time jump between s2 and s3. Yes, at the time it seemed like a great idea, but on the follow-up on s3? There was nothing. No evolution of the characters, no evolution of the relationships, no exploration of any change, and even no real background to the Grounders/Sky People “peace treaty” they were about to sign. Just some “explanations” from JRoth on twitter, and shit on screen and that led to what it led us. People unable to understand the main male character because his scenes were cut off and it was NEVER explained how the Grounders were using the Sky People without allowing them to live on their own. It was NEVER explained how he felt about Clarke being out there, alone, vulnerable. I mean?? No joke, on this show, they’re mostly really bad at exploring characters and relationships; look at the “love stories” that last nothing more than a few weeks and the writers are like “it’s loooooove, it’s the love of X’s lifeeeee”… I mean, no offense to John Murphy, but how does he fall IN LOVE with a girl in three days? It’s Murphy ffs, and yet at comic con, so like… three episodes after Emori was introduced?- JRoth talked about Memori as the greatest love story of Murphy’s life. Wth. Don’t get me wrong, on s3 it was the same thing about Abby and Clarke, and obvis, about Bellamy and Octavia. Maybe they should allow their characters to catch a break between two seasons, before creating dumb time jumps, idk. Five years would definetely be the dumbest of them all… *sigh*

[colorisbyshe]

Sorry for bringing ace discourse into your askbox in the year 2018, but I just noticed the only people that I have seen identifying as ace are people traumatized by sex or dealing w/ internalized homo/bi/transphobia. Ex: Tim Gunn. Doesn't this show that, at the very least, it is something people should get help for instead of just putting a label on it, call it a day and pretend they're systematically oppressed? I'm a victim of sexual violence and I get the feeling but... stop

Okay, so, we’re gonna do this… alright. Back to my roots, back to ace discourse. This post better get zero notes because i am NOT doing lesbian/bi discourse, q slur discourse, AND ace discourse at the same time.

I want to say that I believe there are genuinely asexual people. People who genuinely feel no sexual attraction, understand that to mean that if you aren’t sexually attracted to people that means you don’t want to have sex with them (which means they can still have sexual desires like, “Wow, I’m horny, time to jerk off,” but that being horny in the sense that, “Wow, I wanna fuck them,” isn’t an ace experience but an “allo” one), and are chill with it exist and are ace. I’m fine with them. i’ve BEEN them.

I also think that a lot of people traumatized by sex and genuinely do “become” ace in the sense that they no longer have any interest in sex and are so repulsed that they just can’t feel sexual attraction anymore. While I would recommend some level of therapy to them, I also recognize that a. that’s not possible for everyone and b. therapy doesn’t mean they’re going to change at all. So, y’unno, there’s a fine line to walk when it comes to trauma.

But I also think there needs to be a recognition that the idea that aces are primarily LGBT, neurodivergent/mentally ill/traumatized, minors, and/or women has to be dealt with. A lot of aces brag about how cishet aces are a rare thing and how cishet male aces are practically non-existent and that is the biggest argument against asexuality being a common thing because there is literally no reason for LGBT people to be more likely to actually lack sexual attraction.. but there are about a million and five reasons as to why LGBT people wouldn’t know they’re experiencing sexual attraction, would deny experiencing sexual attraction, and would not want to experience sexual attraction. Same thing for all the other groups listed.

Asexuality–especially when it is so broadly defined to include people who are most definitely not lacking in sexual attraction (demi-aces, grey-aces, lithros, and “sex positive/neutral” aces)–becomes a sort of bandaid label for people in denial or repressing themselves. It becomes a way for people to pussyfoot around their actual labels, the parts of it that are most demonized (ie the sexual parts), and their own feelings. It’s a way to not confront and work through trauma and dysphoria and internalized misogyny and homophobia and trnasphobia and fatphobia and racism and ableism and whatever other phobia/ism we wanna stir the pot with.

It’s a way to maybe say, “Okay, I’m gay, I want to have sex, but unlike those OTHER gay people, I am not a predator who has to have sex and is prone to animalistic urges like all of this homophobia I grew up with told me, I’m One of The Good Ones!” It’s seeing gay or trans or woman as identities defined by sex–and by sex I mean Deviant sex–and not wanting to be grouped in with that, so they find away out via labels.

Meanwhile, “Gay” can include any relationship to sex possible. Horndog, promiscuous, voluntarily celibate, wants to get laid but sucks at it, sex repulsed, traumatized by sex, low libido, high libido, prefers to flick the bean over sex with other people, top sun, bottom moon, vers rising. There is no real need to clarify it to strangers or to make your relationship to sex a central part of your identity, especially if your relationship to sex is just. not wanting it. Like, my central identity as a bisexual isn’t “not straight” or “not gay,” it’s “bisexual.” Most identities don’t work when centralized around what you aren’t or do not want. “Lacking sexual attraction,” especially when it isn’t attached to any behaviour (ie lacking sexual attraction but still having sex), doesn’t mean anything.

So, when people make a big deal out of it, I do have to wonder if there is a level of something else going on. “I’m a homoromantic ace but being ace matters to me more than being gay does,” SCREAMS internalized homophobia to me. And it’s very hard to see it any other way.

So, if I know that person, I might talk to them about it. If I don’t, I might privately be skeptical but reserve full judgments because, again, I believe asexuality is real. But in general.. it’s rough because I do think this kind of explosive movement to reconsider every identity as ace is a response to trauma, internalized self hate, and a sort of need to be pure so you’re “not like the other girls” or whatever other marginalized group you’re kind of trying to create distance from. Even cishet aces seem to be getting invested into it to say, “I’m not like other cishets, I’m not an oppressor.”

I can’t tell what is genuine and what isn’t. As a 25 year old with a medical condition that kicked my libido’s ass and went undiagnosed for years, with internalized fatphobia and a general Bad Relationship with my body in general, who is a homebody who barely even sees enough people to be attracted to (seriously, I mostly just see family, friends who I can’t see as sexual beings, and then old people)… I can barely parse my OWN feelings when it comes to my own sexual attraction, so I’m not gonna dictate someone else’s.

But from experience… yeah I do think a lot of self identifying aces aren’t ace and are using it as a way to avoid confronting inner demons. And that we should work to help them work through that rather than just being like “Yup! Sounds good, you sex loving gay person who doesn’t want o be called gay, just a homoromantic ace, you are totally fine and this isn’t a cry for help!”

QUICK NOTE THO: Tim Gunn never identified as ace the way we mean it now. He meant it as “celibate/just disinterested in sex” and has since clarified that. That’s what ace meant when he used it. And, yeah, he did use it out of the trauma of being cheated on as well as the AIDS Crisis, so no aces should cheer him on as an ace icon, especially since he has semi-recently started to put himself out there again because he was tired of isolating himself out of fear.