#mundane evil terry

[cartoonfanaticmonsterrobotalien]

Solar Opposites: Mighty Solars The Movie Ch. 9

A few seconds later, Mark was taking out the trash, until he sees the Mighty Solars walking.

Mark Melner: Woah.

Korvo/Quasarblast: We better transform back. Phoebe might be looking for us.

Terry/Mighton: Right!

Mark hides behind the walls as he sees the family transforming and gasp in shock.

Mark Melner: Yumyulack?!

Yumyulack notices Mark and gasps.

Korvo: Oh shit!

Yumyulack: FUCKING RUN GUYS!

The Solars run as Mark sighs

Meanwhile with Phoebe, she looks around the place for the kids.

Phoebe MacCarthy: Jesse?! Yumyulack?! Pupa?! Where are you?! suddenly hears screaming

The Solars run through the door. Phoebe then runs up and sees Nova being held captive by Evil Terry.

Nova: HELP! SOMEBODY HELP!

Phoebe gasps.

Phoebe MacCarthy: What the fuck?! Another Terry?!

Evil Terry looks at Phoebe and growls before disappearing.

Phoebe MacCarthy: Be right back fam! I got some ass to kick!

Phoebe runs off to save Nova as she charges off but then notices a glowing teal lasso as she gasp. She picks it up and grows amazed.

Phoebe MacCarthy: Amazing.

The lasso grows brighter as Phoebe gasp then she twirls the lasso and flies to the destination while whooping. Meanwhile, Naomi is in a chamber, with Caitlin, Kano, Barry and Dr. Weatherstone waiting for the right moment. Then, next to her is another chamber with a wrapped corpse wrapped in a familiar pink clothe with white polka dots on it

Kano: Okay, has it been proceeded

Barry: Yes. We’re ready. You sure this is Cheery? Will she come back?

Kano: I’m positive.

Naomi looks at the corpse and notices something suspicious about it.

Naomi: Kano, are you sure this person wrapped in some kind of picnic clothe is Cheery?

Kano: Of course.

Kano smirks evilly as Barry and Caitlin starts the machine. AISHA then appears in the lab to find Korvo and warn him. But then she gasp upon seeing Naomi.

AISHA: What the hell?

Dr. Weatherstone: Okay. Initiate sequence! Now!

Dr. Weatherstone pulls the switch but the machine starts to go haywire as sparks appear through the background and spreads around the area. The scientists duck and starts freaking out while AISHA gasp upon seeing the corpse glowing and coming alive.

AISHA: Holy shit!

Barry: Damn it, what’s going?

Dr. Weatherstone: It appears the machinery must’ve taken some kind of charge that is mocking with undead connecting some kind biological pulse!

The corpse then unwraps herself as she comes back from the dead and is turned into some kind of spirit with her eyes glowing. AISHA then gasp upon seeing Naomi inside.

AISHA: Hold on!

The corpse then takes off the clothes as she grins evilly and flies away as her blast shatters the machine and hits AISHA, who manages to get Naomi out of here but screams in pain. The sprite then flies up to the building and becomes a living person, who turns out to be none other than… Sister Sisto!

Sister Sisto: chuckles Hello world, did you miss me?

Then, she then realizes she is on another planet as she prepares to shout again.

Sister Sisto: I said… voice gets distorted HELLO WORLD! DID YOU MISS ME?!

AISHA gasps. Then, AISHA starts distorting as she screams in pain while carrying Naomi. The scene then cuts to a pier, where a Wallian named Clair sees Evil Terry carrying a bound and gagged Nova. She gasp and races to Montez and Cherie, who is looking at Pezlie cooing.

Montez: Yes Claire?

Claire: Sir… we found Nova. And she appears to be captured by some crook.

Montez gasps.

Montez: Nova?

Cherie: She’s here? We have to save her! Some of us could be in danger.

Pezlie: cooing

Montez: Right! Wallians, defense position!

The Wallians get in a defense position, but then black slime slithers and grabs them by the feet as they gasp, The black smiles cackles like a maniac. The black slime then reforms into Evil Terry as he place the Wallians in his grasp. Phoebe cames by and hears them and follows Evil Terry as she gasp. Evil Terry then ties up the Wallians as they held by a pole near the lake docks.

Evil Terry/Slither: Poor Pathetic Wallians tied up like fish! *holds Cherie by the face* The hero? Hello Cherie

Cherie growls. Then she headbutts Evil Terry. He laughs and brushed off as he prepares to interrogate the Wallians. Phoebe hides behind the crates.

Evil Terry: Now, tell me. Where is Terry?

Montez: What? We don’t know. Who is Terry?

Evil Terry growls.

Evil Terry: grabs Montez by the face Well guess what you fucking knight? One of you does!

Cherie: We don't know what you're talking about? Who even are you? Mr. Psychopathic Cunt?

Evil Terry chuckles darkly as Phoebe looks closely..

Evil Terry: Now… who could it be? Eeeny keenly miny… chooses Nova You!

Nova: Uh...I...I don't know anyone named Terry! I swear!

Evil Terry grabs Nova by the shirt.

Evil Terry: If you wanna keep your life, I suggest you start singing like a canary!

Nova: What?

Evil Terry: Where is Terry?! Speak or die!

Nova: I…I…

Evil Terry growls. Evil Terry slithers into slime and starts strangling Montez.

Cherie: Montez!

Phoebe gasp in shock as she witness what is happening.

Evil Terry: He dies… in 3… 2!

Phoebe MacCarthy: No...

Nova: NO! STOP! I KNOW WHO TERRY IS! JUST DON'T KILL HIM!

Evil Terry lets go of Montez as he breathes for air. Evil Terry approaches her.

Evil Terry: You do?! Where is he?!

Nova starts sobbing.

Nova: tearfully He lives at the neighborhood. Brewerfield Drive…

Evil Terry smirks evilly.

Evil Terry: Thanks for the info, doll.

Nova breathe in and out in tears.

Evil Terry: Terry would be so disappointed if I don’t kill you… well at least one of you!

Cherie looks at Nova with concern.

Nova: What?! What are you talking about?

Cherie: Yeah! We won't let you kill us!

Evil Terry then grins as his eyes glow red and he starts turning black while he grows bigger and muscular as his clothes rip apart in shreds. He roars once finishes becoming some type of monster. He then throws a knife at the rope where it holding Nova and it slices the top of the ropes as Nova falls in the water screaming. Phoebe gasp in horror as she sees Nova falling as “Unstoppable” from Sia plays in the background:

Cherie: NOVA!

The Wallians starts crying out in shock and horror. As Phoebe looks at the Wallians, her eyes starts glowing as forehead band appears on her face and she charges in.

Phoebe MacCarthy: GGGGGGGRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!

As Phoebe leaps, a super suit appears all over her body like shimmering magic and a superhero mask appears on her eyes as she dives in to save Nova. Phoebe summons a lasso as it grabs Nova and pulls her up the surface for safety. The two woman reached the surface as they breath for air and Phoebe helps Nova up.

Phoebe MacCarthy/???: Are you okay?

Nova: Yeah.

Then, they heard Monster Evil Terry laughing as he leaves. Phoebe growls.

Monster Evil Terry: You’re not ready to kill me! laughs You’re not worthy!

Monster Evil Terry then throws a knife as it slashed through each of the ropes and frees the Wallians as they fell safely on the board. Monster Evil Terry gasps. Monster Evil Terry then growls and escapes up on the board. The Wallians help each other up while Nova coughs water as Phoebe holds her close. Cherie runs up to Nova.

Cherie: Nova. Hey it’s okay. Let’s get you to the hospital…

Montez: Come on…

Cherie turns to Phoebe and silently thanks her. The scene then cuts to Naomi waking up at a hospital room with Cheery here and gasp upon seeing AISHA distorting as she starts fading. Naomi gasp in distraught as she rushes to AISHA’s side.

Naomi: Oh no, are you hurt?!

AISHA: Yes! Call Korvo now!

AISHA groans as Naomi starts crying in remorse.

Naomi: tearfully Oh no.. this is all my fault… I am so sorry…

AISHA: Don’t be sorry.

Cue “Love Power Reprise”:

Naomi: This is awful. I don’t what to do. I’m not the true Cheery.

AISHA: Huh?

Naomi: How do I save you? What do I do?

AISHA starts singing

AISHA: I think you are a true woman.

[AISHA]

Because you are real, Naomi

And I'll tell you

How I absolutely know It's how

I'd make a world for you

That never breaks your heart

Where you can grow and thrive

And your every wish can flower

You will always be loved, Naomi

I'm so proud of how I know you'll carry on

I've known a lot of love in your life

But never anything as strong

Love power

With that love has power

And you'll have it there inside you

When I'm gone

Naomi then gains courage and sees AISHA’a booting system and places the plug to help her while Parker comes in.

Parker: Hey what are you doing?! What’s going on?!

Naomi: I…I…

Parker: Oh no! AISHA! Hang on! I got you covered!

Parker helps upload the software. Then, the humans hear something then Kevin revived a text about AISHA from Naomi.

Kevin: Oh no! Some woman name AISHA is is in trouble!

Kevin’s Wife: We gotta help her!

A few seconds later, the humans race in there but then…

Kevin: No! crying hysterically We’re too late! Aisha is dead! She’s-

Kevin’s Wife: Kevin! Wrong room!

Kevin: Oh.

The humans raced in the room and gasp upon seeing something glowing so bright and digital. It is AISHA, but now a digital AI Shlorpian.

Humans: Whoa…

AISHA looks down at her hands and gasps.

AISHA: Wow! I’m a Shlorpian! This is cool! gasp in joy I have eyes! And legs and a mouth! And a mouth! And arms and hands!

AISHA squeals with excitement.

Humans: dumbfounded and shock HUH?!

Miss Frankie: Wait a minute, that’s AISHA?!

AISHA turns around and gasps

AISHA: Oh. It’s just you guys. The humans my family hangs out with and sometimes butt heads with.

Principal Cooke: Wait? What?! How do you know us?! Which family?!

AISHA: You know. The Solar Opposites?!

Humans: Oooooooh! pause for a minute What?!

Miss Frankie: Wait? Are you like their assistant or something?

AISHA blushes.

AISHA: Yeah… Y’know these guys may be a bunch of dumbass motherfuckers, but they’re my wonderful dumbass motherfuckers.

Naomi: Aaaw.

Randall bursts into tears.

Randall: tearfully Why does the love of family always bring me to tears?

Principal Cooke pats Randall on the back. Cheery then wakes up as she moans.

Humans: gasp Cheery Smithers!

Darcy: You’re alive!

Cheery: Uh, yeah. Why are you…

She then sees Naomi as a romantic background appears as the song, “Only Hope” from Mandy Moore plays in the background:

Naomi: Hey. I’m Naomi.

Cheery stares lovingly at Naomi, as she got up.

Cheery: Whoa. Unbelievable. You… must be my other half…

Naomi: I am. I was created when you got sent to the other dimension.

Cheery gasps.

Cheery: Oh my gosh… this is astounding. But… where are the Solars?

Miss Frankie: They’re heading to a diner. For the first time in human forms.

AISHA: Oh thank God! Gotta fly guys!

AISHA flies off. Back with the Solars, they’re now in their human forms heading to the diner. Phoebe, who is back to normal sees them and runs up to them.

Phoebe MacCarthy: Guys! notices Human Korvo Korvo?

Human Korvo: Phoebe?

Phoebe MacCarthy: Oh thank God. I was so worried about you kids. *hugs the family* I am so glad you kids are okay. And I’m glad you found your dads.

Human Jesse: Yeah.

Human Terry is still in shock and blushing by Korvo’s human form.

Human Yumyulack: Uh, you okay Terry?

Human Terry takes Human Korvo’s hand.

Human Terry: Oh my God honey… you look hot.

Human Korvo blushes.

Human Korvo: Really? seductively flips his hair Does this make you feel flattered?

Human Terry: Hell yeah!

The two human alien husbands kiss while moaning lovingly. Human Yumyulack notices Human Terry’s erection.

Human Yumyulack: Aw dude, your erection? Gross! I’m gonna head inside the diner! heads inside

Human Jesse: Yeah. Me too. Come on, Pupa.

Phoebe MacCarthy: Come on kids.

As the others head inside, Human Korvo puts a hand on Human Terry’s chest seductively.

Human Korvo: seductively I gotta say, you do make me feel so hot in this human flesh form of yours.

Human Terry chuckles.

Human Terry: Thank you, you beautiful glowing up hot stud. Shall we head inside?

Human Korvo: We shall.

The two husbands head inside. Mark comes out while wearing a diner apron, but then he sees an old video of the night Annie broke Stacy G’s heart posted by the Jayden, which shows the Headphone guys, the Stacies and other kids laughing at Stacy G who runs in the bathroom in tears.

Mark Melner: gasp silently then growls

A few seconds later, Mark comes up to Aiden, Braiden and Jayden at another fast food place.

Mark Melner: HEY!

Aidan: Oh hey, Mark. What’s up, bro?

Mark Melner: shows them the old video What?! The fuck?! Is this?!

The Headphone Kids gasp and try to lie.

Jayden: Pfft. Relax man, it was just a joke we made with the Stacies. Stacy G was holding them back.

Mark Melner: What?! Why would you do that?! Stacy G’s been my friend since third grade!

Aidan: Your friends? Please! We’re your friends!

Braiden: Yeah. You got us now! And we think you better think about hanging with us… or with those losers… Mark scowls as Braiden grabs Mark’s hand Let’s go.

Mark: yanks his hand away No! Never!

Jayden: What?!

Mark: You heard me!

Aiden: Excuse us?

Mark Melner: cause Braiden to let go No! I’m not going anywhere with you! Not now, not at school anymore! I had enough! I don’t like the way you guys treat people and right now, I am hurting the ones I love thanks to you guys. Might as well find another fourth Headphone motherfucker, you jackasses!

Mark then leaves. As he steps outside, he realizes what he did and squeals with excitement.

Mark Melner: Yes! Yes! It’s finally over! I’m free! I felt great?

Mark laughs but then gasps when he remembers what happened with Yumyulack. The scene cuts to Sonya watering a garden at the homeless shelter while humming “Lollipop, Lollipop Oh Lilly Lolly Pop!” She continues humming the song as she feeds a horse some sugar cubes. She then sniffs something at the diner the Solars at and looks. Back with the Solars, they’re checking what to order.

Human Terry: So, what does everyone wanna get?

Human Jesse: I’m getting a slider.

Then, Human Yumyulack hears a notification from Tik Tok and opens his phone and gasp in horror. It shows the day he was humiliated by the Headphone Guys who read his journal at the pep rally in front of everybody.

Human Terry: Oh you want that cute grilled cheese Pupa, okay? Hey Yumyulack, what do you want to order?

Human Korvo notices Human Yumyulack looking at his phone.

Human Korvo: Yumyulack… are you okay?

Human Yumyulack: in tears I… I’m not hungry…

Human Korvo: concern Why don’t you head to the restroom kiddo?

Human Yumyulack nods and leaves in tears. Then, a waitress comes while Sonya comes and notices a delicious dessert.

Sonya: Wow.

Waitress: Hi, welcome to Bob Slack’s Diner. May I take you order?

As Human Korvo prepare to take his order, Sonya got out a knife and bites into the dessert.

Human Korvo: Oh yeah, I’ll have the uh… sees Sonya suddenly coughing Sonya?

Sonya’s face suddenly swells up as she keeps coughing.

Human Korvo: Oh my God! drops his menu Sonya!

Waitress: Oh my God! Someone call 911!

Human Terry panics and grabs Sonya as he ran out of the diner to the hospital.

Human Korvo: facepalms Terry…

“Overture” from William Tell plays in the background as Human Terry ran all over the neighborhood while carrying Sonya:

Human Terry: Incoming! Incoming! Incoming!

Meanwhile with Human Yumyulack… Human Yumyulack is still in the bathroom behind a diner, crying until he heard a knock on the door.

???: Yumyulack?

Human Yumyulack sniffles and wipes away his tears.

Human Yumyulack: Who-who is it?

Mark Melner: It’s me, Mark.

Human Yumyulack Solar-Opposites grew silent but then crouch in tears.

Human Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: Go away.

Mark Melner: I just wanna talk to you.

Mark Melner sighs.

Human Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: You wouldn’t want to talk to me. turns his head away in tears I’m a freak…

Mark Melner: I don’t think you’re a freak. I think you’re just misunderstood.

Human Yumyulack continues weeping as Mark begins to talk again.

Mark Melner: Look, I am so sorry for the way my friends have been treating you lately…. I’m sorry for not standing up for you and the other kids… and I am so sorry you were humiliated last night…

Human Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: Whatever. It’s obvious you don’t mean it.

Mark Melner: Of course so do! sigh Because, you are so smart, so brave, so protective of your sister… everything… but I should’ve stand up to my so called friends…

Human Yumyulack opens the stall door.

Human Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: But you hang out with them a lot…

Mark Melner: I used to.

“Far Away” from Nickelback plays in the background as Human Yumyulack grows shock by this revelation:

Human Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: You mean you...

Mark Melner: I’m done with them! They hurt you, Stacy G, every unpopular boy at this school! They didn’t deserve to treat you like that, even Stacy G and Jesse!

Human Yumyulack smiles tearfully.

Mark Melner: Wanna get outta here.

Human Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: Yeah. starts raining

Mark Melner: Shit. It's raining. Should we-

Human Yumyulack then accidentally tripped and turn back into his Shlorpian form as he lands on his arms on Mark’s shoulder and leans up to him.

Mark Melner: You okay?

Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: quietly I-I don’t know! I….

Mark suddenly kisses Yumyulack on the lips. The two teenage boy moan lovingly as rain pours on them while lighting struck. The two boys held onto each other as tears falls down from Yumyulack’s eyes.

Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: I...sniffs I...

Mark Melner: Shh…

Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: Huh? What's wrong?

Mark Melner: Nothing's wrong. I love you, Yumyulack.

Yumyulack gets stunned in silence but smiles in tears.

Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: I love you too!

The two boyfriends embrace in another kiss as they back away from the rain and gets underneath a roof.

Mark Melner: So...what do you wanna do now?

Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: Shall we head for shelter?

Mark Melner: I'd like that.

Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: Good! Hang on tight!

Mark Melner: Wait? What are you doing?!

Yumyulack Solar-Opposites: Trust me, honey.

Mark Melner: Wow! Did you just call me-

Suddenly...

Yumyulack turns into Vil-Gil-An-T and carries Mark as Mark starts whooping in shock after Vil-Gil-An-T flies up.

Yumyulack Solar-Opposites/Vil-Gil-An-T: Having fun?

Mark Melner: Wow! You’re really good at flying!

Yumyulack Solar-Opposites/Vil-Gil-An-T: I know! I just learned!

Later, at the hospital, Nova check out with Montez and Cherie waiting for her.

Cherie: smiling Hey Nova…

Nova: Hey.

Montez: We’re so glad you’re okay. Guess you finally see through Sisto’s true colors, huh?

Nova: Listen Cherie, I want to apologize. About everything. You were right about Sisto and everything about the wall and Pezlie. I am so sorry. I just wanted to bring Halk, but I should’ve realized he wanted me to keep living no matter what. And I’m sorry Sisto stole Pezlie away from you. That was wrong. You have every right to be upset with me, and I hurted you very badly over a false prophet. I don’t expect you to forgive me, because I was the worst and I deserve that kind grudge of you… but all I can say is true this… I’m sorry I didn’t believe in you.

Cherie and Montez smiles. Cherie then hugs Nova.

Cherie: Apology accepted, Nova.

Nova smiles tearfully. Then, Human Terry bust in here while carrying Sonya.

Human Terry: Incoming! Incoming!

Cherie: What the hell?!

Doctor: Hey! What’s going on?!

Human Terry: This girl is having an allergic reaction or something! Help her!

Doctor: Oh my God!

The rest of the family comes in as Human Korvo sighs. Later, the family are waiting while Nova, Montez, Cherie and Pezlie looks at them.

Nova: Hey. Are you Terry’s family?

Human Korvo: Oh yeah why you…

Suddenly, Human Korvo sees Cherie and gasp silently as flashback of Cherie as a Benihana chef appears in his mind.

Human Korvo: Cherie?

Cherie: How do you know who I am?

Human Korvo: I know! You’re that chef from Benihana! sighs as he remembers another thing And oh my God., you’re that chef Yumyulack shrunk.

Human Jesse gasp in fear. Cherie is confused but gasps in realization.

Cherie: Korvo? But… how did you… he shrunk me…

Human Korvo looks on with annoyance as flashback occurs.

Flashback Jesse: Why is she going in the wall? I thought she was a nice woman.

Flashback Yumyulack: I said I didn’t want shrimp! If I was allergic I could’ve died! Is that what you want?!

Unknown to them, Korvo and Terry heard everything.

Flashback Terry: Holy shit.

Flashback Korvo: sighs as he facepalms Oh boy…

End Flashback.

Cherie: Yeah. Sorry I gave your son shrimp. That was my bad.

Human Korvo: Don’t worry about it. He inherited it from my mother.

Cherie: Oh God! I am so sorry, I-

Human Korvo: Like I said, it’s okay.

Cherie: Yeah. You’re his father? Right?

Human Korvo: Yes. And this my husband Terry.

Human Terry: What’s up?

Nova: Nice to meet you guys. sees the doctor coming to do with a foster care agent Oh he’s here.

Doctor: Korey Opposites?

Human Korvo: Yes?

Doctor: Don’t worry. Sonya is gonna be okay.

Everyone sighs with relief.

Human Terry: Wait a minute. Why is there a foster care agent here?

Foster Care Agent: We’re taking Sonya back with us.

Human Korvo: What?! Why?! Where are her parents Somar and Lita?!

Foster Care Agent: They were aborted.

Human Korvo and Human Terry froze in silence of shock. Human Korvo sighs sadly.

Human Korvo: quietly Sonya…

Then, the Human Solars and Phoebe comes into the room where Sonya is in, with the foster care agent.

Sonya: Hey everyone.

Sonya then sees the foster care agent as her face becomes a sad look.

Foster Agent: You know shouldn’t run off like that.

Sonya: I’m sorry…

Foster Care Agent: Well right now, you’re coming ba-

Human Korvo stops her.

Human Korvo: Wait right here.

Human Korvo grabs Human Terry’s hand as they head outside in private.

Human Terry: Korvo, what’s going on?

Human Korvo looks down at his wedding ring as he realizes something.

Human Terry: Korv?

Human Korvo: takes a deep breath Terry, remember when you said you love for us to have another child one day?

Human Terry: Yeah. Why do you-

Human Korvo holds Terry’s hand as he makes a decision.

Human Korvo: Let’s adopt Sonya.

AISHA appears digitally as she gains a human form to shapeshift in as she gasp and looks around her body.

AISHA: Oh my God! This is amazing!

Human AISHA then looks her human tits and grows amazed.

Human AISHA: Are these boobs?! WOAH!

Back with Human Korvo and Human Terry

Human Terry: What?! You really want to have another kid too?

Human Korvo: Yes! A billion times yes!

Human Terry starts gasping in joy as he burst into tears of joy.

Human Terry: KORVY!

The two husbands embrace in a kiss as they moan lovingly as Human AISHA hid spies on them. The two husbands head back into their room while Human Korvo gets out custody papers.

Foster Care Agent: What are those Korey?

Foster Owner: Don’t bother. Korey called me, saying he would be willing to take care of Sonya. Though it was your responsibility of watching Sonya when she went out without adult supervision.

Foster Care Agent: *lying* Why yes. I was looking for her.

Foster Owner: That is clearly a lie.

Human Korvo and Human Terry starts signing the custody papers for Sonya while the Foster Owner continues walking to the Foster Care Agent.

Foster Care Owner: You are not longer part of that system. After testing Korey and Terry’s parenting and the results have been positive, they now have full custody of Sonya. And further more, if anything else has happen to Sonya, you will be held responsible.

The foster care agent gasps and growls

Foster Care Agent: But I love those little brats! gets tripped by Cherie’s foot and screams as she falls on the floor You can’t do this to me!

Cherie: I just did, bitch!

Cherie shuts the door as the foster care agent lies there in defeat. Then, Human Korvo talks to Sonya while holding her close.

Human Korvo: Hey, Sonya.

Sonya sniffles.

Human Korvo: Listen Sonya… I know I can’t replace your mother and father. But I want you to know Terry and I are gonna the best we can to take care of you. We promise, we’ll be with you your life. We’ll be there at every gymnastics. We know your favorite foods and allergies that we can protect you from. Well buy you your first prom dress and we’ll be there for your wedding even though it’s gonna be hard to take you away… it’s gonna be okay Sonya.

Sonya: Thanks, Korey.

Human Korvo: whispering Please… call me Korvo…

Sonya hugs Human Korvo as he smiles in tears. Then, Human Yumyulack and Mark came in while holding hands.

Human Korvo: Yumyulack?

He then notices Mark and Yumyulack holding hands. Then, Human Korvo smiles.

Human Korvo: You two sure had fun.

Human Jesse starts teasing.

Human Jesse: So, did you two have your first kiss?

Human Yumyulack: smiling Yeah. We did.

Mark kisses Human Yumyulack on the cheek. Then, Human Yumyulack notices Cherie. Cherie gasps when she sees Human Yumyulack.

Cherie: takes a deep breath in apologetic manner Hey Yumyulack.

Human Yumyulack: The waitress from the shrimp restaurant?

Cherie: Yes. Look. I don’t blame you for shrinking me. And I am so sorry I gave you shrimp. I had no idea you inherited from your grandmother.

Human Yumyulack: My grandmother? Korvo, what is she…

Cherie: It’s okay. Your dad told me everything. And I am very sorry I nearly got you killed. But I also want to thank you and your sister. You changed my life for the better and that led to me having a better life my baby Pezlie and Montez.

Human Jesse: sniffs Great. Now you’ve got me all emotional!

Human Yumyulack is surprised as he began to feel remorseful and looks down. Human Korvo notices this and comes up to his son.

Human Korvo: Yumyulack? Hey, it’s gonna be okay.

Human Yumyulack: I thought that you would hate me more if you find out. That you would kill me.

Human Korvo: What? Why would you think that?

Human Yumyulack: Because, I’ve been such a pain in the neck.

Human Korvo: Yumyulack…

Human Yumyulack: And I know you don’t think I’m a pain…

Human Yumyulack starts crying.

Human Korvo: Oh Yumyulack…

Human Korvo hugs Human Yumyulack, as Human Yumyulack cries into Human Korvo’s chest. Human Korvo hugs Human Yumyulack.

Human Korvo: Shh… it’s okay my little sprout… daddy’s here…

Human Korvo then soothes Human Yumyulack’s face.

Human Yumyulack: You’re not mad?

Human Korvo: Yumyulack, I mow you shrink those people because some of them were jerks but most them we’re good and it was wrong. But you made their lives better… you may be a pain. But, you’re always gonna be my kid.

Human Yumyulack sniffles as Human Korvo smiles and hold him close.

Human Yumyulack: Thanks, dad.

Human Jesse and Sonya: touched by this moment Aaw.

Human Terry sniffles as he smiles and wipes his tears. Then, Human AISHA came busting in.

Human AISHA: Korvo! There’s something I gotta…

Human Korvo: AISHA?!

Human AISHA then notices Sonya.

Human AISHA: Who’s this?

Human Korvo: Sonya. She’s our new daughter.

Human Jesse: And our new sister!

Human AISHA: Oh. Anyway, there’s something I need to tell you.

But then, she notices the happy faces of the family who are welcoming Sonya in open arms that caused her to change her mind, not wanting to break her family’s heart about the truth about Korvo.

Human AISHA: Nevermind…

Human AISHA sighs.

Human AISHA: Congratulations Korvo. I think Sonya is gonna be happy here. With us.

Human Korvo: Thank you.

Human AISHA starts sniffle as she wipes away her tears. The scene cuts back to Kano having a discussion with Barry, Lou, Caitlin and Dr. Weatherstone.

Kano: I think you know why we’re here.

Dr. Weatherstone: Yes. Definitely.

Kano: You know, the last thing we all want is to never stop trying to bring back Cheery. We need to honor her by honoring her plan.

Barry: Kano, we're all pretty clear on your opinion. I wanna hear everybody else's.

Dr. Weatherstone: Okay. I choose for Cheery. Kano is right. Cherry would choose for us? Right Lou?

Lou: I’m gonna have to go for Naomi to stay. Because, resurrecting the dead is unnatural.

Dr. Weatherstone: Caitlin?

Kano: That’s two to one. Let me guess: you're with me, right? That way, your super-hubby can tip the scales to Cheery.

Caitlin: Uh, no, I choose Cheery. I have my reasons, but that's how I feel.

Kano: Well, that’s three to one.

Barry: still mad at Cheery I just need more time to think about it…

Kano: Well, think about it all you want, boss man, but in eight hours, I'm doing this, with or without you, and if you try to stop me, you'll have no one but yourself to blame for the fallout!

Naomi: offscreen You can blame me!

Everyone turns to see Naomi.

Naomi: holding a picture of the Solars They’re like.. a family. Now they’re gonna be torn apart… and it’s all my fault! I wish I never been made… leaves

Dr. Weatherstone gasps. The scientists turn away in shame. Then, Naomi hears a familiar voice.

Cheery: offscreen Naomi?

Naomi turns to see Cheery. Then, she sees the humans behind her. Naomi runs to Cheery’s arms in tears as she cries into Cheery’s chest.

Cheery: Hey, what’s wrong?

Naomi: crying Kano was lying to me! He said that corpse was you and it brought back a crazy woman. He lied to me about everything! I was wrong about this whole world! I am so sorry… you’ve all been so nice to me and I don’t deserve you friendsh-

Ms. Perez: What?! No! Please stay! You saved AISHA’s life.

Humans: Yeah. Please stay. We just got to know you!

Kevin’s Kids: Aw please don’t go. Please.

Randall: crying hysterically I’M STILL CRYING BECAUSE YOU SAVED HER LIFE!

Naomi is surprised that no one is mad at her..

Naomi: You all want me to stay?

Cheery: Of course. You deserve to live. Please stay?

Humans: Please?

Naomi looks at Cheery and smiles.

Naomi cries into Cheery’s shoulders as she comforts her. Then, Kano, Barry, Caitlin and Dr. Weatherstone walks up to the group.

Kano: Hey! You guys are not allowed in there!

However, the humans stare angrily at Barry, Kano and Caitlin. Weatherstone then looks at them sadly.

Jamie: Barry… why did you destroy that device?

Barry: We were just talking about you.

Kevin’s Wife: Yeah we know. We heard everything.

Barry: Wait! Let me explain what’s been going on with Cheery, okay-

Darcy: Explain what?! What are you gonna explain?! That you never wanted to see Cheery’s face again?! She was heartbroken!

Miss Frankie: What were you thinking? There is another crazy evil version of Terry running around the place thanks to you! You nearly got our friends killed!

Barry: I tried to tell you guys! But, Cheery was about to make a bullshit mistake of raising the undead! And I had no choice but to get rid of it-

Principal Cooke: No! No! You do not get to fucking do that! You cannot use Naomi as an excuse for nearly killing Cheery is not how a team is supposed to work! This whole time, we supported her! She was try to recover for her grief! So now you don’t want her and Terry around anymore?! You could’ve rescpted it enough to tell it to our fucking faces! I HAD IT! I’M DONE!

Principal Cooke leaves in a huff, alongside Miss Frankie.

Miss Frankie: Yeah! Me too! leaves

As the humans, along with Cheery and Naomi leave, Weatherstone decided to join them. But, Barry stops her.

Barry: Wait Weatherstone! Wait! You can’t join them! Just try to talk them…

Dr. Weatherstone: Okay please don’t that Barry! I don’t need you to take care of me! I’m not that scared little girl I used to be anymore! Those guys are right, this isn’t right! Whatever is you want to do, do you… do you think this it?

Barry froze in shock. Dr. Weatherstone then leaves as she takes her purse and dries her tears away. Then, she walks up to the gang and they grow shock.

Janice: Weatherstone?

Dr. Weatherstone: Room for more on the bus? Solars?

The others then nod in agreement. Then, Miss Frankie, Cheery, Ms. Perez, Darcy and Janice squeals in joy as they embrace Weatherstone in open arms.

Miss Frankie: Welcome to the sisterhood!

Naomi smiles at this moment.

Barry sighs sadly as he watches Naomi leaves. Later, “Never Gonna Be Alone” from Nickelback plays as the Solars take Sonya home in their car:

Human Korvo: So you ready to see your new home?

Sonya nods. The Solars head to their home. The Solars turn back into their normal Shlorpian selves as Sonya becomes surprised..

Sonya: Woah. Awesome!

Jesse: I know right? Thanks! Come on Sonya, we’re gonna show you to our room!

Sonya: Okay!

The children laugh as Korvo smiles at his now four kids as Terry kiss him on the cheek.

Cue good time montage

Sonya is setting up her bed, while Yumyulack talks to her about his book and Jesse is jumping on her bed in joy. The scene cuts to Korvo and Terry having sex. After the two cum, Terry and Korvo smile lovingly at each other.

Then, it cuts to Naomi moving into a nice homeless shelter as she smiles and waves at Cheery, who waves back at her.

Then, it cuts to Sonya going to school with Human Yumyulack and Human Jesse. Mark meets up with Human Yumyulack and the two share a passionate kiss. Stacy G and Monica smiles as they meet with Human Jesse and Sonya as Stacy G and Monica smiles and welcomes her in open arms. Sonya smiles and hugs Stacy G

Then it fades to Cheery tending her garden with Naomi. She sadly then remembers as a flashback appears. The flashback shows Cheery at Alex’s funeral as she cries over her casket. She then places a flower as she tearfully walks away. The flashback ends as Cheery takes a look at Alex’s ghost and spirit as she smiles. Cheery has finally accepted Alex’s death as she waves at her ghost as Alex’s ghost waves back.

Cheery: Goodbye, my love.

As Alex’s ghost fades away in piece, Cheery smiles and heads over to Naomi, as the two young women starts holding hands. The scene then cuts to a picnic where the Humans Solars, now with Sonya included playing football.

Human Yumyulack: Hike!

Human Yumyulack throws the ball as Sonya catches it. The family keeps playing as Cherie, Montez, Nova, Pezlie, Human AISHA, Cheery, her moms, Naomi and Monica and her parents smiles. Human Pupa catches the football as the family cheer and they dogpile on Human Korvo as they laugh. The scene then cuts to nightime as Terry and Korvo tuck their kids to bed.

Terry: Night, kids. Don’t let the bedbugs bite.

Yumyulack: Okay… yawns as Korvo kiss him on the forehead and he falls asleep

The husbands leave the room and smiles seductively.

Terry: So, wanna have some fun, sugar?

Korvo: Oh-ho. Fuck yeah I do!

The scene then cuts to Terry and Korvo naked while Korvo is asleep. Terry smiles and kisses Korvo on the forehead. Terry then smiles and looks at himself in the mirror while looking at a family picture. Terry wipes away a tear from his eye as the song in the background ends.

Terry: sighs and smiles I’m so glad I have my husband, four kids, nanny and friends with me. That is who I am.

Terry then feels Korvo’s hand on Terry’s cheek. Terry smiles and sees Korvo sleeping on him. Terry smiles and heads back to sleep as he holds Korvo close snuggles with him while kissing him on the forehead. Korvo lets out a little giggle.

[illegiblewords]

SOME ILLEGIBLE RAMBLES AND REFLECTIONS: THE DEAD THREE

Finished my first/main playthrough of Baldur’s Gate 3, and it’s had me turning over all sorts of ideas tied to Dungeons and Dragons lore. A bunch happens to be about cosmology so I'm slapping together one post about the Dead Three and a follow-up about deities more generally. Buckle up if you decide to proceed dudes. This is chunky and opinion/interpretation heavy. CW for mention (not extensive) of graphic violence and sex crimes during discussion of Bhaal and Yeenoghu.

MYRKUL

I get that there are multiple death-affiliated deities in DnD. Our buddy Jergal is the end of all things and the original incarnation of the concept. Myrkul stands for the experience of dying, decay, necromancy, graves, bones, and the fear of mortality. Kelemvor rules over the dead. Orcus is a demon lord and quasi-deity of undeath. Could prob go on.

I've read many different incarnations of death over the years. To set the stage on my Myrkul read, it bears mentioning that Terry Pratchett's Death is probably my favorite. I don't have it in me to see death as something totally malicious. It's very natural, and I tend to imagine that if there were to be an incarnation embodying it this persona would have an intimate view of all the love and grief, vulnerability and intimacy, ugliness and solitude, etc. that mortals deal with. Death has witnessed the end every living being faces, from the dawn of creation until now. Even if it isn't consciously accessed at all moments, death is ancient and experienced and not likely to be shocked by what mortals are capable of anymore. Mortals are small. Uncountably numerous though we are we are far outnumbered by the unliving. What are lives next to planets, to stars? Here I'd argue against assigning value according to how big or small something is, how eternal or how brief, how simple or complex. Everything that is, is a universe unto itself and deserves the gravity of that. It is also very mundane at the same time. To me, death needs to be able to balance the preciousness and commonality of life, of existence, on the tip of its scythe. Death needs to be able to deal with the most depraved beings to exist, but also with every beloved pet put to sleep. Every lost child or parent. Everyone who dies surrounded by loved ones and everyone who dies alone.

Initially, even knowing Myrkul in particular had been a mortal necromancer and not of particular moral standing--I had mixed feelings about him being the evilest of evil skeletons. He worked it well, but the idea of any aspect of death (or any character tbh) being flat evil felt off to me. Especially with 'we're all the protagonists of our own stories' being at work. People don't often look at what actions they'd consider to be evil then go 'I'm going to make myself that on purpose'. Disregarding morality maybe, but being evil on purpose is weird.

So I looked into further lore about Myrkul. One spot that gave me pause was that Myrkul as death (rather than the adventurer Myrkul Bey al-Kursi he’d once been) revels in inspiring fear of death and driving home experiences of loss. From what I found he isn't focused on the name of the individual holding the office of death, but for the force itself being feared. He can be bribed, and he will allow for necromancy/resurrections--but the fear and gravity of death is a sacred thing to him. Disregarding that is a pretty good way to get onto Myrkul's shitlist. I want to take a moment to emphasize the importance of Myrkul focusing on his portfolio over his own ego. That is far from a given in the DnD pantheon, and like I said he's a former mortal himself. It wouldn't be out of the question for him to be a petty and insecure deity. He could have been the sort of guy where becoming a god of death by itself wasn't enough power. If Myrkul was a different person, he might have wanted people to stroke his ego and say how strong he is. He might have been someone who felt inadequate as a god without that affirmation. He could have (as a character) been unsatisfied and forever wanting/dependent upon the views of others to define himself. The fact that he DOES focus on death and decay as forces rather than himself is a big deal in reading him imo.

Anyway. Myrkul's emphasis on death as something feared got me thinking about what would cause a person to put such weight on death being understood in its negative aspect. It struck me that this is actually a very common and even important thing. You don't need to demonize death to see it, either. If you value life as sacred, the idea of life being treated as cheap or disposable is horrifying. When you love something dearly, the idea of that beloved thing being defaced is beyond outrage. It's a kind of sacrilege. People who kill as casually as breathing, who revel in the permanent destruction of someone else, become a source of horror. The absence of love creates a sort of cruelty that can't even perceive itself. And it's not uncommon for human beings in particular to partake in this. Humans dance on the graves of those they deem enemies not because they're relieved to be safe, but because they glory in the end of other lives. They don't recognize that anything of value was lost. There is no tragedy in death anymore. Every gentle moment, every vulnerability, every tragedy in their opponent's life is something to be crapped on and gloated over. There is no greater insult to life itself. Myrkul stands as a reminder that such behavior cannot stand. You can't treat life or death as cheap. To see something horrific and fail to realize the weight of its horror is itself a form of horror. The idea of a death that demands to be acknowledged for what it is, particularly by the living, imo actually denotes a level of care for life too. It might be harsh or ugly, but I don't know about evil. So while Myrkul is certainly flawed and often serves as an antagonist, I’d argue the function he performs is not only important but necessary.

And while it might vary between players, I found Aylin's enthusiastic executions and body defiling pretty uncomfortable. I understand she went through a lot and am fine with her as a character. But I think Myrkul's point stands if the audience feels even a moment of disquiet seeing her celebrate over the corpse of a broken person.

Some things are meant to be ugly.

BANE

Of the Dead Three I find Bane the most disturbing and dangerous tbh—but not for how Gortash invokes him. Way I see it, the other word for tyranny is authoritarianism on a macro-level, abuse on an individual level.

I’d argue that in life, we can only healthily control ourselves and our own individual actions/choices. We can try to persuade others or appeal to their judgment, but we can’t MAKE another person think or act how we wish. When folks attempt otherwise (individually or more broadly) it involves fear, force, deceit, or other forms of pressure. Coercion, enslavement. These fall under the umbrella of tyrannical practice to me. You treat another person as subhuman and strip them of agency.

We don’t live in a pure and ideal world. If a tyrannical person is committing crimes and denying others their free will through force, I wouldn’t call defense through force tyrannical as long as it wasn’t needlessly excessive. Power struggles exist. But the whole practice of using fear, force, deceit, or pressure to control another person is dangerous imo. They're to be utilized as little as possible.

In DnD I don’t think the fringe evil cults would be the ones most at risk for corruption by Bane. I don't think individuals or groups who prioritize self-indulgence would be most at risk, either. The most dangerous and frequent disciples of Bane imo would be within good alignment. This means followers of benevolent gods as well as the nations or groups that consider themselves to have righteous causes. ESPECIALLY those with chips on their shoulders.

When someone assumes they have and always will have the moral high ground, that they are incapable of committing injustice, that their end justifies whatever means, that it doesn’t count as abuse with the 'correct' target… that, to me, is where tyranny festers. The person convinced of their own moral infallibility is the one who sees no need for brakes and so cuts them without concern.

I’d argue everybody has a seed of tyranny in them that can be fed or starved. We feed that seed with our own indignation to become a tyrant victimizing others while still seeing ourselves as powerless. The person who first victimized you can still also be victimized by you. There isn’t a target that exists where finding joy in cruelty gets a pass.

Bane, I think, thrives on the idea that it's no problem if you're enforcing your will. Especially on people contemptible to you.

For DnD purposes, imagine you have zealous followers of idk Tyr. They are willing to do whatever it takes to enforce and spread their definition of justice. They believe in making examples of people at every opportunity. They torture, isolate, rob, and shame those they consider to be unjust or dangerous. If their victims are falsely accused—well. It’s for a noble purpose so the sacrifice is not in vain. And imagine Tyr abandons these followers as hypocrites. He no longer empowers clerics or paladins no matter how they cite scripture or brand ‘heretics’ with his symbols.

Bane doesn’t enter calling himself Bane, god of tyranny. Bane claims to follow a higher justice. Maybe he uses an avatar, maybe he chooses a Banite disciple, maybe he finds a true believer. But he argues that Tyr as an individual was never ultimately what those zealots stood for—it was justice itself. And if Tyr has turned traitor to his own portfolio, mortals need to go over his head to the core concept and implement that. Bane offers a name that suits his purposes and begins sourcing power to clerics and paladins instead. And throughout, as the zealots commit increased atrocities against those they deem dangerous or evil they fail to realize they’ve spiraled into evil alignment after all. They’d think they were either just as good as they’d always been OR BETTER. The compassion of Ilmater is spent on the depraved and corrupt as far as they’re concerned.

I think the real threat of Bane is that he should be 100% capable of corrupting an otherwise heroic party member if they aren’t wary of that capacity in themself. You suddenly find your friend who listened to your problems and supported you through awful shit mocking a person sobbing on the ground as they kick them. And that friend looks betrayed and hurt (or outraged) if you challenge their actions, because they think you should know exactly how disgusting this piece of shit is and how much they deserve the abuse. And even if you concede that individual case—it’s not the only one. The slights worthy of torment become smaller and smaller. A thought or word out of line betrays the ideology of an evil alignment, with the only solution being to beat thoughts and words out of the target until they can only repeat approved ideas back. And even then, it may not be enough.

If it was explicitly confirmed that the deity the zealot followed was Bane all along, the zealot might genuinely not believe it. They might get pissed at the very suggestion. What they do against the wicked isn’t tyranny after all. They’re righteous.

Denial doesn’t serve to disempower Bane in the least if tactics remain unchanged.

BHAAL

I’m holding off on more detailed Bhaal thoughts until I complete a dark urge run, but I’ve listened to lore on both him and the demon lord Yeenoghu recently—and I think there’s room for a really cool potential contrast.

Yeenoghu Lore

Providing this particular video link for the curious, as a way to help illustrate what I’m drawing from.

Yeenoghu holds the title as demon lord of slaughter. He glories in filth, rape, excessively graphic murder, torture, violence, and playing with corpses along the way. He’s meant to come across as a bestial, self-absorbed, remorseless desecrater. And when I say bestial, I want to draw attention to a particular IRL factoid that might be worth considering.

I love animals to bits. I don’t think animals generally contemplate morality the way humans do just due to cognitive differences and limitations. I also think it’s important to remember that humans are ALSO animals, so certain things umbrella’d under ‘human experience’ would probably apply to at least some animals too. If there are human altruists and human serial killers, we should be able to expect that animals likewise have some altruists and some serial killers within the scope of individual variation.

Cruelty is not exclusive to humans. Orcas will essentially torture smaller animals to death by flinging them into the air with their tails repeatedly like balls until repeated beatings and suffocation kill them. Dolphins commit rape and chew on live puffer fish to get high off the toxins. Chimpanzees are a horror unto themselves with cannibalism and mutilation and basically whatever atrocity they can commit. Wolves and cats sometimes hunt to excess just for the joy of it and don’t eat all they kill. Hannibal the swan (as a specific and notably homicidal individual) beat and drowned any other swans visiting his pond and showed his signet how to do it. I could go on. Some cases it might be a matter of the animal not having theory of mind to recognize that they are inflicting pain on another conscious creature. Other times, like with pissed off chimpanzees, they know EXACTLY what they’re doing and it’s on purpose to cause maximum suffering.

I think Yeenoghu should embody a little bit of both propensities. He’s just utterly self-absorbed and doesn’t give a fuck about the experiences or perspectives of other living things except insofar as they impact him.

Bhaal I want to research more like I said, but one thing I remember from my initial play through was finding a note from the Dark Urge to Orin.

Little sister, whatever in the Gray Wastes are we going to do with you? Bhaal will never care that you waste your time, posing your corpse-dollies. Bhaal doesn’t care whether you give him the corpse of a pauper or a king. At the end of the day, all Father wants is death in droves, death in numbers. To sap away the life of this dull world as swiftly and widely as we can. You plan, you plot, you prevaricate, and you waste his time. Bhaal doesn’t need us to think. He needs us to kill. You kill beautifully, and have talents in your shapes’ magics that I never will. But you do not understand Lord Bhaal. Perhaps it is a failing of your diluted blood, as a mere grandchild. I am his sole living pureblood. I will accept no challenge from you, until you show some damned respect.

To be honest this is interesting af to me because it positions Orin a bit more in-line with Yeenoghu’s modus operandi in some ways. But what sets apart the principles of Bhaal from Yeenoghu or Myrkul?

The Dark Urge suggests the goal of Bhaal is the extinction of all life, but to be honest I’m a bit skeptical. Seems like short term thinking. Even if Bhaal pulled that off, once it’s done there is no more murder or god of murder for that matter. If Bhaal is aiming for a cessation of existence and wants everyone else along for the ride maybe that’s what he’s after, but I dunno. That seems like something fans/players/loremasters would have touched on before.

I’d like to invite this possibility for foiling instead:

Life consumes other life by nature. Animals, plants, fungi, bacteria, so forth—it isn’t just a matter of philosophy. One life cannot exist without destroying another. We need to eat. If we don’t, we die well before reproduction enters the picture. But it’s more than that… you take a step, you kill countless tiny organisms you aren’t even aware of. You swat a fly. You hit something with your car. You move gracelessly or touch carelessly, and catastrophe ensues. Etcetera.

It is inevitable that your existence will mean the end for the life of another living thing. That’s just how it goes.

It could be interesting on a LOT of fronts (both as members of the dead three and as former adventuring companions) if Bhaal acted as a kind of philosophical opposite to Myrkul the way I previously described.

If the Dark Urge’s note is to be trusted, Bhaal has no interest in ritual or glorified death per se. Bhaal would be more about the mundanity that comes through the act of killing. Life is fragile as-is and often ended by accident. Killing in its most common form is thoughtless and unconscious. To Bhaal, if every life is a universe then the universe looks meaningless. There is no importance or fanfare to any of it. If one side is ‘everything matters, give weight to life and death’, Bhaal would be ‘nothing matters, we are not capable of affording reverence to every single life and death we encounter’. More specifically, the mass deaths Bhaal favors would be a kind of illustration of the uncaring and casual relationship living things have with killing other living things. The more casual and effortless it is, the more I’d imagine it serves Bhaal. Sadism and revelry miss the point—there is no hierarchy. Suffering is inconsequential. Fear is inconsequential. Instinct is inconsequential. To live is to kill by Bhaal’s logic.

It isn’t limited to murder in the sense of a member of one species killing a member of the same species. It’s more Bhaal is the god of killing. He’d gain power from murder too sure, but also hunting, harvesting, and butchering. With these interpretations in-mind, we can actually figure out how the Dead Three might have answered Jergal's question about what worth a mortal life holds. With the disclaimer this is very much conjecture. I think Myrkul would likely be "Each life is of infinite value and merits sacrificing everything for." That lends life a heavy weight and makes death a fearful force for all. It would also mesh with Ketheric as his chosen. Bane would lean into "That depends on a person's deeds", "The only life that matters is mine", or "Depends on the mortal". From those positions, the speaker argues for a hierarchy of life where some is more expendable than the rest. It's easier from that position to slide into adopting a role as judge and executioner, and from elevating yourself into a role of authority where other voices and experiences count less than your own. Bhaal I think is reflected in "Life’s only value is as currency. Doesn’t matter to me otherwise", "The only life that matters is mine", or "No one life is worth more than any other. We are equal." Bhaal has the implicit question in-turn: what is the blood-price of your own life? How much have you claimed in your own name to keep moving? It's kind of the belief that while "The only life that matters is mine" is Bhaal's answer, every other living thing should be answering the same way. There's more nuance than that of course, and likely truth falls somewhere in the middle. We aren't mentally capable of giving reverence to every death, but we can recognize in general terms and do our best case-by-case. We have a right to protect ourselves and what we love, but others share that right.

Feel free to offer different stances or thoughts though, and if you made it this far goddamn thank you for reading this monster.

[avaveevo]

Members of The Ultra Opposites (New) (For @cartoonfanaticmonsterrobotalien )

Main Members Terry/Solar Flare: Fire Powers and Mundane Transformation Korvo/The Legendary Super Shlorpian: Ice Powers and Super Shlorpian Transformation Yumyulack/Psylock: Psychic and Mind Reading Powers Jesse/Electra: Electricity Powers The Pupa AISHA EVA, AISHA's Cousin

Occasional Members Janiz, Korvo's older sister: Martial Arts Daryl/Dark Matter, Yumyulack's boyfriend: Psychic Powers Principal Cooke/Super Cooke: Flight and Laser Eyes Ms. Frankie/Shadow Lady: Martial Arts and Weapon Mastery Nova/Lady Roseus: Gift Kevin/Super Kevin: Fire Breath Randall/Ultra Man: Super Strength and Flight Jaime/Firey: Fire Powers Darcy/Miss Darcina: Muscle Growth Ms. Perez/Shout Out: Sonic Scream Sherbet/Violet: Color Changing Powers Cherie/Agent Red: Martial Arts Montez/The Master: Psychic Powers Pezile/La Oscuridad: Shadow Powers Mia/Shine Light: Green Lantern Powers Janice/Master Smasher: Super Strength Sonya/Soarin’: Super Strength and Flight

Enemies Ophelia: A space empress and The Ultra Opposites’ arch-nemesis Nicholas Ronalds/Night Runner: A boy that Jesse used to be in love with until she learned that he was a mutant and dumped him Kitty: A spoiled brat who became a criminal after her parents cut off her allowance Captain Rusty: A robot pirate Stacey and Casey/The Phenomenal Twins: Former circus performers turned livestreamers Iron Knuckle: A former Russian wrestler who became a cyborg after he got into a giant accident during one of his matches Dr. Brain: Korvo and Janiz’s father Robo Korvo: An evil robot version of Korvo built by Ophelia

[shoemakerobstetrician]

One of the most intimate, romantic Aziraphale/Crowley fanfics I’ve ever read, with nary even a kiss:

Take My Hand, Take My Whole Life Too

Set the night after the world didn’t end, in Crowley’s flat, before the switch.

By @thebibliosphere

Apologies for the nightmare of link text that follows, ignore it. I just can’t seem to get Tumblr to show a simple link on the iPhone app! 🤬

Archiveofourown.org/works/19288561

<a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/19288561"><strong>Take My Hand, Take My Whole Life Too</strong></a> (2724 words) by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebibliosphere"><strong>Demorra</strong></a><br />Chapters: 1/1<br />Fandom: <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Good%20Omens%20(TV)">Good Omens (TV)</a>, <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Good%20Omens%20-%20Neil%20Gaiman%20*a*%20Terry%20Pratchett">Good Omens - Neil Gaiman &amp; Terry Pratchett</a><br />Rating: General Audiences<br />Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply<br />Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)<br />Characters: Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley (Good Omens)<br />Additional Tags: hello it is me, back on my tooth rotting fluff bullshit, I have no idea if this counts as hurt/comfort, but just in case, Hurt/Comfort, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Choosing Sides, Missing Moments, they're having a moment<br />Summary: <p>He didn’t want to think about the bookshop. It hurt in a way that was entirely too visceral to be angelic, and entirely too earth shattering to be human. It was the love of several hundred years, burned up in an instant. It shouldn’t have mattered, not if he were truly angelic. But he shed a few silent tears anyway and felt somewhat better for it. All things considered, it wasn’t the end of the world.</p><p>No, that had been much more complicated.</p><p>And yet, somehow so very mundanely human. No great battle, no heavenly sounding of horns or hordes of demons. Just a choice, a choice not between Good and Evil, but between darkness and light, hope and despair, fear and… and love…</p>

[bishop-percival]

@stuckinuniformdevelopment

(prev) Teddy couldn't help but blush when Amy bluntly spoke about his needs. That's how he should feel about her, isn't it? (Well, aside from not caring.) After a long pause Teddy managed to calm himself so he could pick out individual voices from the crowd. They didn't seem completely convinced that Shep initiated it. Yet it sounded like this would dispel any doubts about his overblown sins. Teddy waited for Bishop Percival to speak before kicking the side of the pulpit, hard. For a brief time the crowd was startled into silence and he spoke before they could get over it. "Why yes Amy," Teddy said as he leaned on the side of the pulpit and rested his arms on it to directly look her in the eye. "We're confessing a sin that'll be resolved in a few days simply to waste our time and open ourselves up to your annoying probing questions." Then Teddy smirked at her. "Say, have I ever told you how smart you are?" Several Glornists snickered at that and he smiled in satisfaction. Any chance to get a jab at one of his least favorite Glornists was a blessing. Then Teddy glanced at Terry before averting his eye. It was a shame that this plan involved alienating the few normal Glornists. "As for whether I still love her... well... it's complicated. She has fifty years left of her sixty year sentence. Even if she manages to get released early for good behavior it's so far away that one of us may not live that long." After a brief pause he said, "We're both in our mid thirties. For reference." "That doesn't mean I don't want to give up any hope of a life together but..." Teddy clenched his fists as he struggled to maintain a neutral expression. "I have waited and will wait years before I can give her any more than a chaste kiss in front of creepy guards. Don't I deserve something in the meantime?" Then Teddy took a deep breath as he prepared to say something particularly cruel. "So if she didn't want me to be easily swayed she shouldn't have gotten caught." He looked up at the audience while wrapping his arm around Shep's waist. "What could she possibly do if she finds out anyhow?"

@follwrshep

Shep looked at teddy nervously, face flushing as he pulled at his hood to cover his iris “She is locked away for the majority of her lifespan, I doubt she has the gall to even attempt anything.” He coughed “And I do *not* have a big fat crush! Can’t a man admire another man in a non-romantic light? You must be foolish if you mistake my knowledge of his excellency as something as simple as a crush!”

Mike was always impressed with the way Teddy carried himself through confession sessions. When Mike was assigned to stalk him, while there were some interesting moments, it was otherwise pretty mundane as far as being a scientist in an evil galactic army goes. Between that and learning Teddy only joined the church to learn about magic, Mike made the connection pretty fast that Teddy’s sins are a biiiit exaggerated. But of course, not wanting to blow Teddy’s cover, Mike never challenged him or casted doubts during his confessions. Mike silently listened to the subtle hints of Teddy’s struggle to talk about such a personal subject in this way. He couldn’t help but admire his dedication. 

Bishop Percival nodded along to Teddy’s defense. “Indulgence of selfish, fleshly desires. Glorn loves to see it.”

After Shep spoke up, the deacons shared glances and snickers with each other in a “yeah sure ok whatever you say” kind of way. 

Percy dramatically draped an arm over his forehead.

“No crush on me? Am I not good enough for ol’ Lamb? Is it because I’m not an already engaged man? Oh boo hoo…”

He then brought his hand down to his chin again

“Just out of pure curiosity…Aside from the fact he was an easy target to commit adultery with, what else are you gaining from this? What else do you like about Theodore here, if anything?”

[harveylikestoart]

This was supposed to be a comic but I wrote way too much dialogue and decided to just draw a scene then post what I had planned or something. The thing has a lot of. Well. Dialogue. Anyways it’s under the read more thing don’t look at me it’s not the BEST. I’m a lil rusty and keep in mind it was for my brain.

DONT LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEEEE

The second the dads had walked past the tree line with Walter, Nicholas had only spared a single nod at Nick’s spectral form before looking towards the other kids around the fire. It’s now or never.

He takes a deep breath.

“I have something to talk to you all about.”

The kids eye him with different expressions, Lark’s being that of annoyance, “are you supposing to lecture us about ANOTHER mundane thing we have done to, undoubtedly, give you ire?”

A sharp snort sounds from Nick floating behind the Oak twin. Nicholas rolls his eyes.

“No. Just, give me a second Lark.”

Terry Jr puts a hand on his shoulder, “it’s cool just take your time dude.”

“Thanks. So. I know I’m not the most well liked in the group-“

“a bit of a stretch there-”

Sparrow cuts him off REAL fast with a, “No no Terrance! He is correct for once, go on NARCOLAS.”

“ANYWAYS, you might have noticed me acting a little bit weird AND I HAVE A PERFECTLY GOOD EXPLANATION. It may seem odd but please keep an open mind, lord knows I have.”

Terry Jr rolls his eyes, “I think that part will be pretty easy with all that’s happened Nicholas. If it’s something that beats three previously dead grandparents who have arisen with super powers, I’ll bite.”

Nicholas temples his hands downwards and sweat builds up on his neck. Despite having travelled with the others for a while and even sleeping in tents with them, in this fucked up version of a camping trip, he had never been that close with any of them, least of all the Oak-Garcia boys. If he would call anyone his friend it would probably be Terry Jr, being more level headed, even more so since he and Ron had actually started talking to each other.

He liked hanging with him, intelligent conversation was investing to him if he were to be honest and Terry was super cool! Nicholas did not want to seem even more outcasted from this group. He didn’t want to be alone, even if he did have a ghost clone by his side, although it makes him look like a lunatic if he were to only talk to someone no one else could see.

And having his dad by his side is obviously nice, he’s a great guy! Just having him be his only friend seemed a bit. Well, sad.

“Right, okay, so. Ever since the end of Glenn’s trial there has been a new member of the group who no one but I can see. He kind of looks like me and his name is Nick, Nick Close.”

Grant’s eyes grow wider, thinking back to what Darryl had said to him as the group narc continues to speak.

“He says that he’s Glenn’s son and that he was with you all the entire time before the trial and that MY dad and I were never here!”

Grant tries to interrupt but Nicholas continues, “which is CRAZY because everyone knows we were here right? We all got transported here at the same time! I just thought he was some weird hallucination manifested from the stress because, like I said, no one else can see him!”

The other boys stare at him. There is a brief moment of silence before Terry Jr speaks, “uhhhhhhh. Okay. What does-“

Sparrow cuts him off once again, “Did the trial teleportation perchance mess with your head? Split your mind in twaine? Like some weird jekyll and hyde situation? Tell me Narcolas, do you feel the urge to commit atrocities now?”

Nick floats by groaning in frustration. He had hoped this explanation would be fast and easy but that seems to have been the wrong assumption. Now he’s been demoted to Nicholas’ evil twin. Well jokes on him. He happily accepts this new role.

“Wait, you said Glenn’s SON right?” The group finally turns to Grant who is staring intensely at Nicholas.

“Because my dad was talking about that to me yesterday. That YOU were Glenn’s son and not, well, your dad’s. It had like, something to do with that trial thing too.”

Nicholas blinks real hard at the reveal as Nick zooms into the middle of the group staring at Grant and yelling in excitement.

“I KNEW IT! THEY KNOW! FUCK YEAH!! DUDE WE GOTTA GO TALK THEM SO THEY CAN HELP GET ME BACK OR SOMETHING!!!”

He floats around feeling triumphant in his theory being confirmed but Terry Jr then asks, “is uh, is the ghost kid here? Ghost clone, you know, uh, Nick?”

Said “ghost clone” freezes in the air and looks towards his counterpart who raises a brow to confirm whether or not he should say yes. He nods and Nicholas looks back at everyone, “yeah. He’s been floating around you all for a while, he got REALLY excited at what Grant said.”

“So this ghostly clone is just another narc who can report back to you? This is MOST disappointing AND boring!” Lark leans an arm onto Sparrow who nods with fever as Nick snaps out a “HEY.”

“Well, he’s actually more like Glenn, you know, punk rock I guess, unruly, annoying, loud-“

“HEY?!”

Nick shoves his hand through Nicholas’ head, making him cartwheel his arms as he almost tips over backwards from the jumpscare, “STOP DOING THAT!”

The group jumps at the sudden outburst, Grant hovering closer to Nicholas in worry, “what’d he do?”

“He’s being QUITE ANNOYING as I said.”

The floating boy blows a raspberry in response. Nicholas squints his eyes, not willing to be looked down upon.

The twins immediately perk up, “so you’re saying, he is a cooler and more RAMBUNCTIOUS version of you? A RULE breaker? Your opposite? Interesting, interesting indeed…”

Nick smiles, “hell yeah I’m interesting!”

He goes to fist bump Lark, stopping short when he remembers his predicament. His hand stills before he crosses his arms and leans back in the air. A soft “fucking damn it” slipping past his lips.

Terry turns back to Grant, intrigue evident on his face, “what else did Mr Wilson say about this whole, swapping thing?”

The group’s attention falls onto the Wilson kid as he begins to get a little nervous from the multiple pairs of eyes, “well, uh, he said like uh, that when Glenn lost the trial Nicholas basically got a new dad? Something about timelines? The Law? Guys I dee kay I had a panic attack trying to put it all together in my head honestly. I just don’t think he or the other dads know about ghost Nick.”

“They don’t?”

“I mean! He didn’t say anything about there being ANOTHER kid! He just said Nicholas was Nick Close.”

Sparrow leans over, head in his hands, “Grant I can feel my OWN panic attack coming on, how, pray tell, would Narcolas be this Nick if there is already a Nick that he’s seeing! My brain is about to COMBUST!! It is also very annoying that you both have some form of Nick in your name you are OH SO confusing!”

Lark softly noogies his twin’s head, concern in his gaze before turning to the rest of the group, “well, we already call him Narcolas so it only appropriate to refer to the duo as Nick and Narc!”

“HA! Sweet.”

“Well, this is just a theory,” Terry starts, gaining the attention of the group, “but maybe he’s like a projection of the life you could have had? If the dads are correct AND this isn’t another Dennis thing, then this Nick could be like. Ugh. Fuck, some kind of like remnant of this changed timeline that can’t go anywhere because you are already in the body he would have?

In philosophy club they talked about what makes a person a person and that if you were to put a deceased person’s working brain into the body of someone with a damaged brain it isn’t the same person? But also it’s technically the same person? Even though it’s now this weird abomination to na-”

“TERRANCE I AM GOING TO VOMIT.”

Sparrow shoves his head into Terry’s torso in an attempt to make him stop talking. Terry Jr immediately apologises and grabs the weird leather water bottles Walter had provided them, making sure the now pale faced boy isn’t actually going to puke. Lark has a hand on his brother’s shoulder and has started chewing his cheek, Grant is on the ground smushing his face into the dirt and letting out a loud groaning noise in distress. Nick grimaces at the display.

“This is…. weird. And also batshit. Maybe we should stop tryna figure out WHY I’m here and more about HOW to get me to be like, not a ghost you know?”

“Yeah, yeah I agree.”

Nicholas turns from Nick and sighs heavily, dragging a hand down his face, “guys if we try to figure this out we’ll explode, let’s leave it to the dads they’ll probably understand it, even though it is the most confusing thing ever.”

“I agree with Narc for once! Quick question, what is a philosophy club and how does it help Nicky-boy?”

Everyone jumps at the now noticeable presence of Paeden.

Shit they forgot he was there.

The little fighter stares up at Nicholas, a mischievous glint in his fiery eyes as he grins and bounces in place, excited energy radiating from him.

“Is he here? Can he see me? Tell him I say hi! NICK IF YOU CAN HEAR ME I’M GONNA RIP YOU INTO THE MATERIAL PLANE WITH MY GRUBBY LIL TIGER HANDS MY GUYYYY!”

He starts howling into the night air and tugging on Nicholas’ arm as if it would connect him to the ghostly boy. Nick snorts at this, a fond smile tearing its way across his face. Leave it to Paeden to lift the mood, “hey shortstack.”

“Uh, he said “hey shortstack.” Nick, I mean.”

“OhOHOHO THAT’S DEFINITELY HIM! FUCK YEAHHHH! NICK BABYBOY WE’RE GONNA GO BUST YOUR DAD OUT OF JAIL AND ALL WILL BE RIGHT AGAIN! I was working on a pair of brass knuckles for you but I guess in this reality Walter says I was making them for Glenn? Which is stupid because they’re for YOUR little baby hands!”

“AW SICKKK! The second I can hold things I’m gonna totally punch the shit out of someone with them!”

“Wh- don’t do that!”

“What’d he say what’d he say?? Whatever it was I agree with it FULL-HEARTEDLY!!”

The rest of the boys watch as Nicholas tries to relay messages to Paeden, who grows more and more lively as they talk about whatever violent acts he will commit with Nick once they are fully reunited. Sparrow slowly uncurls and leans onto Lark, a smile shakily forming, his brother reflecting his expression. Terry Jr sighs and leans back relieved that the atmosphere has been infected by Paeden’s excitement and Grant who has now lifted his head, dirt sticking to his cheek, is chuckling at the scene.

Nick feels something for the first time that day that wasn’t just the small joy of a successful prank or the annoyance of a busted lighter. It’s warm. The kind of warm you get from drinking hot chocolate in winter, the kind from putting your hand in someone’s bigger hand, the kind of warm you feel when you’re in bed being read biopics until you fall asleep.

The warmth of someone you love just being there with you for once.

.

.

The night air felt a little bit colder.

[theminecraftbee]

last life/hermitcraft headcanon I have to write down before I lose it: right so any of you read some terry pratchet witches before? scar’s like those. he is, technically, capable of impossible feats of magic. he just doesn’t feel the need to most of the time. why cast an illusion to do something for someone when you can convince them to do it for themselves? why use magic to give them confidence when a placebo with no magic at all will work just as well? most of scar’s “magic” is exactly the principle of headology: do something very practical and convince the people around you that it was some grand mystical feat so they’re more likely to accept it. people are, he’s found, often more willing to accept something was magic than accept perfectly mundane, but effective, actions. if he’s ACTUALLY resorted to magic, that’s when you have to worry.

in other words he uses headology for evil.

this WOULD make scar a witch rather than a wizard but I think that suits him fine.

[terrence-silver]

How do you think things would have changed for Terry if he had a beloved during the entirety of Karate Kid 3? Would it have made the things he went through during all the years after the KK3 tournament any easier for him if he had someone by his side? Would he feel less alone if beloved stuck by him after John left him for 30 years? Do you think the Terry we see in Cobra Kai would be different in any way if he had a beloved leading up to that time of his life?

I think if he had an actual, genuine beloved he cared for and who cared for him over those past thirty years of John's absence, starting from the 80's, the Terry we'd see in Cobra Kai would be much different. Doesn't erase his inherent issues, psychopathy or the fact that John leaving would hurt so badly, but I always imagine a family man. A Silver Dynasty. Several children. Grandchildren, by the time Season 4 happens. So many of them, in fact, that the Silvers are a majorly branched out thing and there is no telling how many of them are there. It is murky information not entirely public knowledge because they maintain they mystique of their status. You cross one and you cross them all and they pop out of the woodwork like so many soldiers and they form a virtual miniature army around their overlord, tycoon father. No vapid, empty, meaningless social circles this time around. He's more of an aged, respected, old money patriarch, really. His offspring his enforcers as much as his blood and bloodline. He translates the army dynamic he picked up in Vietnam and applies it to his current life because that is the best way he can function due to his traumas, treated or untreated. If there's a war to be fought for the soul of Valley, he is a general with a platoon of Lieutenants. He's bred them all from his own flesh.

Don't get me wrong; he's still dark. He's still cruel. Still vengeful.

In fact, he is somehow stronger still than what we ever see. Somehow even more confident in all his schemes and intentions. Looming. Threatening. Powerful on an international level. Haughty. Why? Because he has a whole network of people effortlessly supporting him. Devotion! Give us devotion as a central theme! I would've adored it if they show expanded on the 'Evil has loved ones' trope we see in TKK3 and gave Terry a legitimate tribe full of people entirely on his side, to relay the scary, mundane aspect of corrupt, morally reprehensible men in the ruling class often indeed having a majorly elaborate and complex support system and individuals who share their idealogy. He is like a cult leader. The head of a sect, unofficially, on the downlow, yet you'd never tell. He almost awaits John's return. Probably kept meticulous track of him. When John does return, his children do too, from various corners of the world, some running Dynatox, some running PR agencies keeping his name pristine, some having ventures of their own --- but, when Terry Silver heralds, they come. I adore the raw might of that. As for beloved? Terry's a messy, hazardous individual, but fact is, he's exceedingly loving where it counts, to the point of mania. I covet the idea of someone legitimately loving him back just for him in a union that lasted entire decades and this is a hill I'll die on.

[innuendostudios]

Thoughts on... some funny games

[no spoilers to speak of]

Thoughts on Lair of the Clockwork God

The wisdom of the gaming cognoscenti insists that comedy is hard to do in video games. Having grown up with Monkey Island and Zork, I've never found this convincing. But one true thing is this: it's hard to write about comedic games. The ineffability of humor is hard enough to describe in less-interactive media; I can't even explain to my partner why Gretchen saying "I met January Jones once!" on You're the Worst busted me up, and they were sitting right next to me when she said it. Throw in the "you had to be there" nature of the player's active participation and I lose myself in a cornfield. The thing I found hilarious might come a beat to early for you, or not at all, or not be funny in text like it is in gameplay.

Why did I like Lair of the Clockwork God? It made me laugh.

The premise and particulars are a lot of "that could go either way." Ben and Dan - stars of Ben There, Dan That and Time Gentleman, Please! - have returned. Ben is still an adventure game star, but Dan has adopted platforming mechanics in an attempt to get with the times. So playing the game involves switching back and forth between a character who can leap across canyons but can't pick up items or talk to people, and one who can combine inventory but can't climb over a 3-pixel rock.

Does that sound potentially funny? Potentially grating? Yes to both!

The plot centers around our heroes trying to save the world from several simultaneous apocalypses and having to teach human emotions to a supercomputer in order to do so. (Don't ask.) These means, rather like Ben There, Dan That, traipsing through a number of fantasy worlds (read: computer simulations) until the correct emotion is provoked. This requires cross-genre cooperation: finding ways to get Ben to areas only Dan can access, getting Dan new power ups by combining objects in Ben's inventory (an act Dan insists on calling "crafting").

The best bits are at these intersections, when Dan's platforming is the puzzliest and Ben's puzzles take advantage of Dan's skills. Periodically the game gives you a Dan-centric platforming gauntlet the controls are NOT precise nor pleasant enough for, or a Ben-only moon logic puzzle that leaves you googling the walkthrough.

But I liked it! A lot. The genre-hopping seems to have invigorated the developers, Ben Ward and Dan Marshall. I discussed my favorite joke in Ben There, Dan That (in what is probably the least popular video I've ever made that wasn't asking for money), but was also dismayed that the game was never that clever again. But this one is, several times over! Progression here involves cheating your way to a better respawn zone, goofing around in game menus, exploiting "glitches," exiting out and loading up entirely other games. There is a lot of poking and prodding at what a game of this nature can or should be.

But, honestly? The only real selling point is... it was funny. The humor is as anarchic and metatextual as in previous titles, but it feels good-natured in a way BT,DT didn't. And there are, here and there, little bits of meat on its bones - the characters wondering if, as a couple thirtysomething white guys, the world hasn't left them behind, no longer comfortable with the juvenile humor of their youth but not really understanding the youth of today, but having not yet fully escaped the mentalities they used to hold. (There's an unspoken humor to Dan's idea of "modern" gameplay being 2D platforming mechanics, especially at a time when adventure games are significantly more popular than on his last outing; this is a good joke whether or not it's intentional.)

Also: this game contains the most poignant urinating-on-a-grave puzzle in gaming history, and you may quote me on that.

Having finished it months ago, I can't even remember what all the gags were that tickled me at the time. Comedy fades from memory faster than drama or frustration. Mostly I just remember having a good time.

Thoughts on The Darkside Detective

Here's a hook: sometime after the mayhem ends in Ghostbusters, The Exorcist, Evil Dead 2, or some other paranormal blockbuster that you watched over and over in the 90's until the VHS wore out, some overworked detective has to come into your town and piece together what the hell happened.

This is his story.

It's a good gag, and the devs wring every drop from it. Existing in a world where these things are commonplace and you have to fit them into some notion of "police procedure" is just funny. Like, it's one thing to have a running gag where you keep observing the moon in outdoor scenes, commenting, with increasing hostility, that its behavior is suspicious (it has been present at multiple crime scenes); it's a slightly different thing when, given the things you've encountered, the moon being the Big Bad is actually somewhat possible.

The game is divided into six main cases and three bonus DLC missions (which come included in the base game now, and the third of which is the proper ending/setup for the sequel). You are the cop tasked to deal with The Other Side - and, when The Other Side bleeds into our own world, its cops have to deal with you. You have a sidekick with a mental maturity of about 6, which I guess makes you the straight man. (You have to grade on a curve to find a straight man in this game.) And you solve tasks like rounding up escaped gremlins or finding an AWOL lake monster all juxtaposed with mundane problems like inter-office squabbles and having not bought your Christmas presents early enough. It's (pleasantly) lo-res and sparsely isolated, so the dialogue and premise do most of the work, but they are ably up to the task.

The gameplay... not so much. I'm an adventure game lifer, so I can put up with a lot of nonsense. It's mostly straightforward inventory puzzles and occasional minigames. Most of the puzzles are fine enough. As the cases progress, things get more involved, and the DLCs especially involve some awful moon logic. And the minigames are not above using that same jumping peg puzzle you've solved in a dozen other games already. So gameplay ranges from serviceable to irritating, but it mostly exists to string together funny lines and silly images. (Christmas mall elves being secretly in service to Krampus - that's the kind of thing we're talking about here.) You won't feel much guilt for opening up a walkthrough; the puzzles aren't why you're here.

The sequel has just been released, and both games are cheap, so check them out if you feel like smiling.

Thoughts on The Procession to Calvary

It's rare for a game to be hilarious to look at.

The Procession to Calvary takes its name from the Bruegel painting. It also takes all it's graphics from Renaissance oil paintings, and the designer delights in making famously rendered heroes and religious icons steal, stab, fart, and swear.

A strong Terry-Gilliam-with-After-Effects vibe is what we're describing.

You play as a lady knight from a war that's just ended, which sucks for you because, in this age of peace, you're no longer authorized to kill. And killing's, like, you're whole thing. But the one person your new, pacifist king wouldn't stop you from killing is the warlord you just deposed, who fled to the South. So you embark on a nonsensical journey to seek out the one human on Earth you are authorized to kill, because killing is just The. Best. Ever.

Of the three games we're discussing, this is the most overtly cheeky, and, at times, the most scatological. I could've done with a bit less scatology, if I'm being honest, but the cheekiness is very winning. As with Lair of the Clockwork God, a lot of jokes could go either way - a field of people being tortured and a woman on a blanket selling commemorative torture merch could be painfully try-hard. But something about the victims being seemingly everyone ever crucified or broken on the wheel in a famous painting, and having them writhe on their crosses in a way that is both gruesome and goofy, and having a cacophonous soundtrack of their screams and moans that you will now imagine every time you look at one of those elegantly elegiac paintings from now on... it works. That the music score is being played by an extremely jaunty piper who dances behind you just out of sword's reach as you traverse the field pushes it over the top.

Oh, and the puzzles, while never hair-pullingly obtuse, will leave you stumped at times. Push past that to get the proper ending, but, if you're sick of trying, you can, at any point, just start stabbing your way through problems. Which, again: it takes a very deft touch to make "protagonist resorts to violence" actually funny rather than lazy and obvious. And maybe, in another game, the perfect timing of every animation, the clever quips, the careful contrast of cathedrals and high-society music halls with gleeful sword-swinging wouldn't be enough. But something about it being frickin' Renaissance paintings carries it the last mile.

This is probably the basest game of the three, but it's also the one that made me giggle the most. Having a BFA that required several art history classes may have something to do with it. But check this thing out.

[legacytaughtarchived]

𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗖𝗔𝗡𝗢𝗡  𝗤𝗨𝗘𝗦𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡𝗦  -  𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹  𝗳𝗿𝗲𝗲  𝘁𝗼  𝘀𝗲𝗻𝗱  𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲.

💥  COLLISON  :  what  emotions  do  they  have  trouble  dealing  with?

    mercy  absolutely  struggles  when  people  show  them  real  genuine  kindness  &  empathy,  always  thinking  it  to  be  some  kind  of  manipulation  technique.     they  also  struggle  with  their  anger,  they  have  their  dad’s  temper  &  sometimes  struggle  to  keep  it  at  bay,  to  keep  it  under  control,  yet  when  they  do  release  their  anger  &  pent  up  frustration,  it’s  still  very  control  almost  calm,  it  is  truly  scary  to  witness.

🍧  SHAVED  ICE  :  do  they  still  have  any  objects  from  their  childhood?  what  significance  does  it  have  to  them?  what  would  their  reaction  be  if  they  lost  it?

    they  have  their  very  first  gi,  it’s  tiny  in  comparison  to  the  one  they  wear  now  since  they  were  five  years  old,  it’s  something  that  most  would  question  about  why  they’ve  kept,  it’s  like  a  physical  show  of  progress  for  them,  if  they  lost  it,  they  would  be  upset  but  would  definitely  move  on  ;  they  have  a  fairly  ratty  plushy  bunny  that  their  mother  gave  them  when  they  were  three  years  old,  they  always  used  to  sleep  with  it  &  whilst  they  don’t  anymore,  they  don’t  the  heart  to  throw  it  away,  if  they  lost  it  though,  they  would  be  devastated  ;  a  framed  photograph  of  mercy  &  terry  from  their  first  winning  tournament,  they  were  ten  years  old,  it’s  one  of  their  favourite  photos  as  neither  knew  it  was  being  taken,  it’s  a  true  show  of  pride  &  joy,  something  that  no  one  can  take  away  from  them.

🌙  MOON  :  what  is  your  oc’s  greatest  wish?  how  far  are  they  willing  to  go  for  it?

    to  be  free  of  their  father,  to  no  longer  live  in  fear  of  him  &  to  just  feel  like  they  can  finally  make  their  own  choices     -     they  are  still  trying  to  figure  out  how  far  they  are  willing  to  go  &  what  they  are  willing  to  do  to  get  what  they  want,  aside  from  just  running  at  the  age  of  eighteen.

☀️  SUN  :  are  they  a  morning  person?  what  is  the  first  thing  they  do  in  the  morning?

    they  are  a  morning  person,  always  have  been  an  early  riser  due  to  early  training  sessions.     their  morning  routine  consists  of  getting  out  of  bed,  making  their  bed,  washing  their  face,  tying  their  hair  back  before  going  for  a  run,  always  doing  some  kata  when  they  return  as  a  cool  down  exercise  before  showering  &  getting  ready  for  the  day.     mercy  loves  the  mornings,  hates  feeling  like  they’re  wasting  a  day.

🕷️  SPIDER  :  what  is  their  biggest  fear?  do  they  have  any  irrational / mundane  fears?

    their  father  is  their  biggest  fear,  something  they  will  never  admit  &  rarely  let  show,  but  mike  is  the  thing  they  will  fear  the  most  &  when  they  have  felt  like  they  live  with  the  monster  that  haunts  their  nightmares,  very  little  less  scares  them.

🌹  ROSE  :  do  they  like  valentines  day?  have  they  been  confessed  to  before?  have  they  confessed  to  anyone  before?

    mercy  is  a  romantic  at  heart,  they  love  to  do  things  for  their  girlfriend  and  will  make  amazing  romantic  gestures  when  they  can,  valentines  day  is  a  day  that  they  think  is  a  little  pointless  as  they  don’t  feel  they  need  a  day  to  show  they  love  someone,  but  will  still  do  something  to  make  it  special  for  their  girlfriend.     they  have  confessed  to  someone  before,  a  girl  named  amelia  who  was  at  their  old  dojo  in  new  york  -  they  dated  for  a  year.     but  no  they  have  not  had  anyone  confess  to  them.

🙉  HEAR - NO - EVIL  :  what  is  the  worse  thing  your  oc  could  hear  from  someone?

    you’re  just  like  your  father     -     would  absolutely  break  them,  they  have  done  everything  to  make  sure  they  are  not  like  mike,  to  hear  that  someone  would  think  they  are  just  like  him  no  matter  what  they  did,  would  absolutely  push  them  over  the  edge.

🎁  PRESENT  :  what  types  of  presents  would  they  be  most  happy  to  receive?  are  they  good  at  gift  giving?

    they’re  extremely  grateful  for  anything  that  they’re  given,  however  they  love  gifts  that  shows  it’s  obvious  that  thought  has  gone  into  them  rather  than  how  much  money  is  spent  on  the  gift.     mercy  is  incredibly  good  at  gift  giving,  they  have  always  been  able  to  pick  up  small  details  about  people  &  will  go  that  extra  mile  for  people  to  make  their  gifts  personal  for  the  person  receiving  the  gift.

📚  BOOKS  :  how  were  they  at  school?  what  is  their  best  subject?  what  is  their  worst  subject?  do  they  have  a  favourite  subject?

    mercy  is  very  good  at  school,  but  doesn’t  often  show  it,  they  have  true  dedication  &  discipline  that  was  instilled  in  them  from  karate  &  use  it  in  other  aspects  of  their  life,  including  school.     their  best  subject  is  mathematics,  despite  the  fact  that  they  don’t  like  it,  they  are  incredibly  good  at  quick  thinking  &  problem  solving.     their  worst  subject  is  art,  whilst  they  are  creative  in  their  own  way,  they  just  aren’t  very  good  at  art  at  all.     their  favourite  subject  is  history  or  english.

☁️  CLOUD  :  a  soft  headcanon

    mercy  loves  to  read,  they  used  reading  as  an  escape  when  they  were  younger,  as  well  as  a  way  of  finding  company  since  they  did  not  know  of  many  people  their  own  age,  they  will  always  have  a  book  on  them  &  will  love  to  read  to  people  that  they  care  about.     if  mercy  lends  you  a  book  that  they  have  read  &  like  to  talk  to  about,  it’s  their  way  of  letting  you  in  &  showing  you  a  part  of  their  world  that  not  many  are  shown.

[cartoonfanaticmonsterrobotalien]

Solar Opposites: Misadventures of the Solars Episode List (Pt. 2)

Watchhounds: After getting put under house arrest when they are falsely accused of harming two feuding watchdogs teams, the Solars realized there is a dangerous threat out door, and, in a parody of HBO’s Watchmen tv series, started their own business to catch the thief.

Homeward Arch: Terry runs away after being overwhelmed by his Mundane form too much and sets out to find answers to his past. The rest of the family tries to find him while Janiz is haunted by memories of her lost lover, Kimber.

The Life-Ending Story: The Solars find their lives at stake thanks to Pagemaster, a mysterious person based on a villain from Shlorpian Cooke’s play set.

Shattered Mirror: A mysterious dictator figure appears and suddenly looks a lot like Terry, but more dangerous than ever.

Non-Canonical: In a homepage of “Chronicle”, three high school students receives super powers, but then one of them grows corrupted and it soon enough threatens to put the whole family in danger.

Insane in the Web Frame: The Solars face humiliating by six high school students and friends who started a competition that ends up ruining their project and their friendship.

Yumyulack’s Meltdown: Overwhelmed by the humiliation at the hands of his classmates, Yumyulack ends up turning into a Super Shlorpian for the first time.

The Solars Want Their Website Back: The family loses their website thanks to the return of an insane Mandy man of the humans in the past.

Catfight: The Person behind the Shlorpians’ transformation is revealed and she turns out to be an old foe from the wall. And Korvo is not gonna be friendly with her.

The Pupa’s Huge Day: Pupa is suddenly turned a Mega Pupa and starts to go manhattan. The family must find him before the army gets to him.

Scorned: In this very special episode, after a fight with Clare, who tries to buy a gun to protect herself from a gang of girl bullies, but ends up nearly hurting Stacy G, Jesse gets put under house arrest but then the overwhelming experience causes her to become a Mundane for the first time.

[padawanlost]

does vader come back to kill watto? i hate entering discourse about it because i see people say “well he wasn’t that bad” or “he didn’t treat shmi and anakin that bad” and honestly? why are they making excuses for slavery?

Tbh, I doubt I’ll ever understand what drives someone to justify slavery. I really don’t get it. but, after realizing the only case of slavery no one tries to justify as a ‘necessary evil’ is Obi-wan’s, I have my theories.

Anyway, Anakin never returns for Watto in anger. Watto, to my great saddens, gets to live a long life. In fact, that piece of garbage manages to outlive both Shmi and Anakin.

"Anakin's mother?" Luke said. "Was her name Shmi?" Ody shook his head. "I can't recall. Like I said a lot of years have passed. But if you want to find out more, you should go to Watto's and " Ody clapped his hand against his forehead. "Sorry, I keep forgetting. It's not Watto's anymore. It's Wald's." "Wald's?" "Yeah, Watto retired. Now it's Wald's Parts. But that's why you should go there. Wald knew Anakin. Let me give you directions” [Ryder Windham. The Life of Luke Skywalker ]

I think people also minimizes the trauma of Anakin and Shmi’s enslavement because neither character thinks to much of it. They have become so used to mistreatment that Watto’s brand of cruelty feels like a respite. 

Leia sat slumped in the seat beside Han, faintly aware of her tender shoulder and feeling distinctly inadequate in the presence of her grandmother’s memory. Watto had been Shmi’s master—and her son’s—for years, and still she had somehow found it inside herself to forgive him. Leia had been Jabba’s slave for one night, and she had strangled him with the chain that bound her. Of course, there was a world of difference between Watto and Jabba. [Troy Denning. Tatooine Ghost]

Besides, what choice did they have in the matter? He raced because he was good at it, Watto knew he was good at it, and whatever Watto wanted of him he would do. That was the price you paid when you were a slave, and Anakin Skywalker had been a slave all his life. [Terry Brooks. The Phantom Menace]

To Leia, a princess of Alderaan, the thought of being a Hutt’s slave was unacceptable. To Anakin, who grew up as a Hutt’s slave, Watto felt like an improvement.  What Leia considered an unspeakable crime, Anakin considered mundane. I think people forget that. People forget the horror of it. So let’s remind them:

When Count Dooku flies at him, blade flashing, Watto’s fist cracks out from Anakin’s childhood to knock the Sith Lord tumbling back. [Matthew Stover. Revenge of the Sith]

Physical pain he could have handled even without his Jedi mental skills; he’d always been tough. At four years old he’d been able to take the worst beating Watto would deliver without so much as making a sound. [Matthew Stover. Revenge of the Sith]

Yeah, a four years old so used to being beaten he no longer cries is totally fine.

Both mother and son were grateful to Watto for keeping them together, and after sharing a dingy, fetid room with six other slaves at Gardulla’s estate, they were astonished to learn they would have an entire hovel to themselves at Slave Quarters Row, along the outskirts of Mos Espa. Watto believed they should feel grateful, and made it clear that if they didn’t do as he said, he’d fill the hovel to capacity with additional slaves. [Ryder Windham. Star Wars®: The Rise and Fall of Darth Vader]

Which single mom doesn’t want to live in precarious conditions. Again, totally normal.

Operating a Podracer required incredibly fast reflexes, the competition was fierce, and Anakin — as far as anyone knew — was the only human ever to fly one and live. Despite this accomplishment, Anakin knew he’d have to do better to please Watto. [Ryder Windham. The Rise and Fall of Darth Vader]

When he’d belonged body and soul first to venal, rapacious Gardulla the Hutt.… and after her Watto, who hadn’t been cruel, exactly, but was greedy and careless and willing to see him die racing a Pod. [Karen Miller. Star Wars: Clone Wars Gambit: Stealth]

Nothing wrong with forcing a kid to risk his life for profit, am I right?

“For a moment, I suspected you’d run away from Watto.” transmitter detonate?” “Pleasure?” Watto said, his trunklike nose turning slightly upward as if recoiling from Anakin’s words. “You think I like cleaning up exploded slaves? Bweh heh heh!” When he was done laughing, he gestured with a three-fingered hand to some more scrap-filled containers that had just been delivered, and said, “Now get back to work! I want this scrap sorted by noon!” [Ryder Windham. The Rise and Fall of Darth Vader]

Freedom and fun? Who needs it when you can be threatened with explosives and forced to work under TWO suns?

“Anakin, how are you feeling? Truthfully?” If he said hungry, Obi-Wan would throw something at him. But he was. He was ravenous. And he hated, hated, feeling hungry. The sensation too. It’s unfortunate but it can’t be helped. We’ll manage.” [Karen Miller. Clone Wars Gambit: Stealth]

Starvation. That’s healthy.

“Rassa dwee cuppa, peedunkel!” Watto screamed, starting in again on Anakin in a fresh burst of Huttese. The pudgy body lurched forward a few centimeters with each epithet, causing Anakin to step back in spite of his resolve. Watto’s bony arms and legs gestured with the movements of his head and body, giving him a comical appearance. He was angry, but Anakin had seen him angry before and knew what to expect. He did not cringe or bow his head in submission; he stood his ground and took his scolding unflinchingly. He was a slave and Watto was his master. Scoldings were part of life. [Terry Brooks. The Phantom Menace]

Verbal assault is always fun. 

Watto was immediately defensive. “He’s my boy, my property, and he’ll do what I want him to do!” [Terry Brooks. The Phantom Menace]

Oh, to be considered property. What a fun concept!

Not only Anakin and Shmi were slaves, without any rights or freedom, they were forced into hard work, starved, threatened, abused and humiliated. 

But, please, tell me again how not rescuing kids under the same or worse circumstances is the right call.

[laurasimonsdaughter]

Hi!! I read your book in one morning instead of studying for my exams, and honestly that's the best decision I've made in a g e s!! it was so beautifully written and exactly the kind of story i love!! do you happen to have any recommendations for similarish stories? worlds where the fantastical and the mundane operate side by side in a modern setting? that really is my jam in terms of story and now im craving more!!

Thank you, anon, gosh that’s sweet 💜

(I do hope your exams didn’t suffer for it though)

As for your request for reading recommendations…my shameful secret is that I do not read a whole lot anymore. I’m too busy writing ^^;

My other secret, but one I‘m not at all ashamed of, is that when I read, it’s very often children’s literature. Especially because they have the uplifting urban fantasy that I like. So while I can’t say they properly simmilar Coffee and Faerie Cakes, I can wholeheartedly recommend these:

Which Witch? by Eva Ibbotson. A coven of insane witches with extravagant familiars, who have to work as shop girls, beauticians and factory workers on the side to pay the bills. A good witch who desperately wants to be an evil witch. A dramatic evil wizard in search of a girlfriend. And a fantastic little boy lost in the midst of it all.

Dial-a-Ghost by Eva Ibbotson. Ghosts need homes too! Do you have an old building that could use some livening up? Why not call the Dial-a-Ghost agency and they will match you with the perfect spectral tennant. (Both Ibbotson’s books come with a warning for “mistreated orphan protagonist”, but I promise they’ll be okay).

The Strega Borgia Chronicles by Debi Gliori. Picture a large castle in Scotland, now populate it with a mother who is an incredibly inept student-witch, a father who is perpetually bewildered, a computer geek son, a rat and spider-loving daughter, a baby with way too much talent for magic and a rather harassed magical nanny and traditional butler trying to keep them all in check. Now add a teenage dragon, a gryphon and a yeti as pets. Need I say more? (I like the first three books best, but they’re all good, even though they can get dark.)

The Discworld series by Terry Pratchett. Not children’s literature for once and not urban fantasy (the Discworld is classic fantasy turned upside down and inside out), but probably the books that had the most influence on me. Other people have explained why and in what order to read Discworld much better than me, but I beg anyone who likes fantasy and/or clever yet playful writing to give it a go. I fell in love at Lords and Ladies, because a pragmatic approach to the classic Threat of the Fairy Queen narrative is all I’ve ever wanted.

I hope there is something to your liking here, anon, and I wish you a wonderful day!

[avaveevo]

The Ultra Opposites Members and Enemies (New!)

Main Members Terry/Solar Flare: Fire Powers and Mundane Transformation Korvo/The Legendary Super Shlorpian: Ice Powers and Super Shlorpian Transformation Yumyulack/Psylock: Psychic and Mind Reading Powers Jesse/Electra: Electricity Powers The Pupa AISHA EVA, AISHA's Cousin

Occasional Members Janiz/Lady Super Shlorpian, Korvo's older sister: Martial Arts and Super Shlorpian Transformation Daryl/Dark Matter, Yumyulack's boyfriend: Psychic Powers Principal Cooke/Super Cooke: Flight and Laser Eyes Ms. Frankie/Shadow Lady: Martial Arts and Weapon Mastery Nova/Lady Roseus: Gift Kevin/The Flamethrower: Fire Breath Randall/Ultra Man: Super Strength and Flight Jaime/Firey: Fire Powers Darcy/Miss Darcina: Muscle Growth Ms. Perez/Shout Out: Sonic Scream Sherbet/Violet: Color Changing Powers Cherie/Agent Red: Martial Arts Montez/The Master: Psychic Powers Pezile/La Oscuridad: Shadow Powers Mia/Shine Light: Green Lantern Powers Janice/Master Smasher: Super Strength Sonya/Soarin’ Girl: Super Strength and Flight Phoebe/Katana: Martial Arts Monica/Acid Girl: Acid Powers

Enemies Ophelia: A space empress and The Ultra Opposites’ arch-nemesis Nicholas Ronalds/Night Runner: A boy that Jesse used to be in love with until she learned that he was a mutant and dumped him Kitty: A spoiled brat who became a criminal after her parents cut off her allowance Captain Rusty: A robot pirate Stacey and Casey/The Phenomenal Twins: Former circus performers turned livestreamers Iron Knuckle: A former Russian wrestler who became a cyborg after he got into a giant accident during one of his matches Dr. Brain: Korvo and Janiz’s father Robo Korvo: An evil robot version of Korvo built by Ophelia Miss Songstress: A singer who wants Korvo’s musical talent to rule Earth Basilisk: A mutant fish with laser eyes

Theme Song

[sooosketchy]

My Nintendo Switch Screenshots 2017

Backed up most of my screenshots off my Switch and wanted to share a few of my favorite moments I captured during the first year (2017) playing breath of the wild (botw). My 2018 and 2019 collection will go up in a separate post. Botw was the only physical game I owned the first year having the Switch and was completely immersed in the world of Hyrule in a way I had never experienced with any other video game.

Very First Screenshot

Kass

First time encountering Kass was such a memorable moment. You’ll be minding your own business traveling new areas and scoping out the territory, then all of a sudden you hear this distant sound. You think to yourself, “am I just hearing things, did I just pass the source of the sound, am I heading the right direction?” Until the sound gets closer and you head towards the direction faster looking for where the sound is coming from and then you see him, Kass. This big blue bird, holding an accordion, playing a pretty sweet song and placed in spot where you least expect to find him. Finding him is one of the reasons why I loved this character, he’ll be located in spot across Hyrule you just don’t expect, And once you hear a snippet of his song your’re compelled to stop what your doing and find him and solve his puzzles. First time meeting him I spent a few minutes appreciating his catchy tune and made it a goal of mine to find every single spot he was stationed at. I was invested in his story and wanted to learn more about him along my journey. He reveals hidden shrines so its worth putting time aside to find him since it helps complete all the shrines anyways. Getting him home was gonna take some time but I loved bumping into him during my lonely travels and hearing him play. I wanted more background and story out of Kass and luckily we got a bunch more through the Champions Ballad expansion pass. Yay!!!

Korok

Till this day I’m still trying to track down each Korok. And getting to the Great Deku tree was still one of the toughest puzzles to figure out. But its worth the trouble. Gazing up at the night time sky underneath the Great Deku’s branches make for some really pretty shots. 

Meeting Sidon

Mipha was the first champion I meet along with her family and the Zora people. I realized how complex and tedious it was going to be to actually look through every nook and crevice in each town/village. I spent two days exploring the Zora domain and all the surrounding area to complete the Zora outfit.  

Dragon

First time seeing a dragon was from the edge of Lake Hylia and after that I had no clue of what they did, how to get close to one and how many more there were. Atop Mount Lanayru was where I met my first dragon.I spotted it from afar while climbing up the mountain and thought it was some kind of glow in the dark octopus but it wasn’t. Awaking it and bringing it back to its former self was fun to do and seeing it fly away happy and not sick with the ganon flu was nice. Wonder why the remaining two dragons didn't have a side quest where each one was unlocked? Does anyone find it wrong that in order to collect scales, horns, nails or whatever other drops the dragons leave behind, you have to shoot an arrow at it? Ouch!

Outfits

My favorite outfit is the Dark Tunic. The whole set gives you night time speed when you walk. And it scares the pants off of anyone who lays eyes on you. You get some interesting reactions from different NPCs and enemies. 

Picasso... I mean Pikango

Always took the time to see how his paintings looked whenever I’d find him at a stable. I want to recreate a few of his paintings and put my own spin on it. 

Gerudo Town

Eeeeeeeeee! Yup, my reaction was the same as Villa’s. I still see Link in the traditional Gerudo outfit on my timeline and I can’t lie, Link looks pretty cute in it. It was funny seeing him all shy in it and was a nice change of mood from the usual fight evil, save Zelda, tough knight vibe. Gerudo town was quicker to explore and interact with all it had to offer since it was in the middle of a huge sandbox. There was still a lot of ground I had left to cover outside of Gerudo town that I have yet to go back and explore. Its that big! Meeting Riju and seeing her hidden softer side was a great addition to her character and left me wanting to know more about her. So I had a bit of a sleep over at her place and got to see her act her age for once and read through her journal as well. I have an entire collection of shots following her around but that will be up on another separate post. There is so much you can learn from a character by just following them and seeing what they do on a daily basis. You see certain sides of them that you won’t normally see if they’re in specific areas or in front of other figures. Its amazing how they incorporated so much of their personality into the game by simply showing small mundane things they do around town, at their homes, or out in the open. Shes my favorite next gen champion and I resonated with her story more than any other character.  

Bolson

This man made me my dream home. I wish I had this home in real life. And hes always out in the front of the house rocking his sick threads. If you complete his requests he’ll furnish the home with all the things a home owner should ever need. Terry used to work for him in the beginning but hes a whole other side quest that’s worth checking out too. I keep all my rare gear safe and sound hanging on my walls including a few of the champions gear. I come visit the house from time to time to either switch gear or change an outfits color.

Lynels

I don’t go anywhere near them unless I absolutely have to. It is not a fun time. There’s different shades of Lynel; blue, gold, silver and drop powerful gear like arrows, swords and ingredients too.

Shrine Monks

These guys look so creepy! Are they dead, mummified, or just dehydrated and decrepit. One interesting detail that I didn't realize until a couple shrines later was they all have different poses and props they use. Makes me wonder how powerful and knowledgeable the Sheikah were many years ago. They must have ruled back then because of all the advanced technology they created. Now the Sheikah tribe comprise of just a few members in a small quite village. Some have even gone rouge and become part of a new tribe called the Yiga clan. I can see why Purah stays the way she is cause Sheikah don’t age to well. Poor Impa.

Death Mountain

The center city where you’ll find most of the Gorons is small and didn’t take a whole lot of time to see everything, but outside of it takes time. There a few side quests peppered beyond the hardened volcanic border,in the pools of lava, as well as around the town heading up to the volcano. I advise you to bring your flame resistant outfit; you can get from Goron city, and max it out with the help of the fairies. 

Scenery

This game is SO BEAUTIFUL. Sometimes I’ll be in the middle of a puzzle or walking down a hill and all of a sudden ill get a glimpse of the surrounding, then I end up staring at it and zooming in with the camera. Truly breath taking. 

What was I suppose to be doing again..... oh yea, Zelda. 

Memories

These were so tricky to figure out but finding one was so satisfying. I saved most of them till the very end, right before entering Hyrule castle. I would start by looking at an image and pinpointing areas in the background and guessing how far the picture was taken by looking at the foreground. 10/10 would do it all over again. 

[ao3feed-goodomens]

Take My Hand, Take My Whole Life Too

read it on the AO3 at http://bit.ly/2WUAeP2

by Demmora

He didn’t want to think about the bookshop. It hurt in a way that was entirely too visceral to be angelic, and entirely too earth shattering to be human. It was the love of several hundred years, burned up in an instant. It shouldn’t have mattered, not if he were truly angelic. But he shed a few silent tears anyway and felt somewhat better for it. All things considered, it wasn’t the end of the world.

No, that had been much more complicated.

And yet, somehow so very mundanely human. No great battle, no heavenly sounding of horns or hordes of demons. Just a choice, a choice not between Good and Evil, but between darkness and light, hope and despair, fear and… and love…

Words: 2724, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Characters: Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley (Good Omens)

Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)

Additional Tags: hello it is me, back on my tooth rotting fluff bullshit, I have no idea if this counts as hurt/comfort, but just in case, Hurt/Comfort, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Choosing Sides, Missing Moments, they're having a moment

read it on the AO3 at http://bit.ly/2WUAeP2