#my cancer story

[cherrylicious-dreams]

4 months since my surgery and I thought I was doing good for some time. And then my health started declining rapidly. I tried to keep all the normal things I usually do, work out 5x a week, count calories, work, socialise, take care of my pets. But honestly I hardly have any energy. My body feels so unwell that I hardly make it through the day. I am having a really hard time adjusting to the thyroid hormone medicine and while I find the right dosage I have to cope with this version of myself. And I often find myself frustrated, wanting the energy to do everything and not feel exhausted. I am 26 for fuck sake, you know? I wanna live and I can't.

[lazylittledragon]

what do you mean youre technically a detransitioner cause of terf bullshit?

it's a v long story but i detransitioned for a couple of years when i was 16/17, for multiple reasons but mostly because i fell into the blaire white/kalvin garrah chamber of "you have to be This way to be trans otherwise you're not real".

i was already Deeply insecure about myself and my 'passing' and i was led to believe that i couldn't want to wear makeup or skirts, and i couldn't choose not to have bottom surgery, and i couldn't do anything but bind for 12+ hours a day to the point that my ribcage is still misshapen. basically i thought that if i wasn't suffering enough doing 'feminine' things, i couldn't really be trans, so i should just go back to being a girl and suck it up.

the terf bullshit is because i'd seen a lot of terfs/detransitioners talking about the 'dangers' of testosterone and how it would turn me into a horrible ugly evil monster and how there was nothing worse than wanting to be a man. which combined with 'you need to fully medically transition to be valid at all' creates some very dangerous and upsetting feelings to cope with.

it also came from trying really hard to put myself in a little box before i realised that my sexuality/gender are very fluid and it's FINE for me not to have a label and just do whatever i want. when i was 19 or so i went back to using they/them (and eventually he/him) and changed my name again because even though i like doing 'feminine' things, i don't want to be seen as a woman.

tldr: i was conditioned by transphobic/terf rhetorics to think that i was being trans the 'wrong' way so i couldn't be trans at all, so i believed i must actually be a girl if i still wanted to do 'feminine' things. nowadays i am a transmasc who does feminine things because i don't give two shits about what any transmed prick thinks of me anymore.

[suntails]

⚔️🐍

[miquella-everywhere]

Calling it now but the final boss of the DLC is gonna be Godwyn

[greenerteacups]

Are there any other wizarding families that are underexplored in canon and pique your interest in a similar way to the Blacks?

This is a unique function of what food my brain worms like to eat, but no one's doing it like the Blacks. The drama? The intrigue? The Gothic horror? The prodigal sons and lost daughters and killers and sinners and martyrs and saints? The wizard Catholicism of it all? The story of the House of Black is the best book never written.

[reverieaudios]

I'm in the uncomfortable position of wondering if I should ask my former housemate why the carpet in her room reeks of pee. Specifically human pee. This is not dog pee. Human pee. In multiple spots. So much pee.

[drbtinglecannon]

Hi-Fi Rush really said "let's make a rhythm game that's made with such love and passion for music, has good characterization and growth, the humor and character designs are fun, the enemy battles are creative, the main villain is defeated through the power of friendship, and it contains tons of bonus content with no microtransactions, all for half the cost of an AAA game" and it fucking slapped

[brian-in-finance]

Video 📹 from Instagram

Remember… guitarist and composer Billy Marrows wrote this suite of music for his mother during her battle with cancer, and recorded it with an ensemble comprised of close musical friends and members of his extended family. The mood is appropriately intimate… All proceeds go to the World Child Cancer charity which is an excellent reason for purchase, but the music is reward enough. — Jazzwise

[sibelin]

why do all the edgy content about cancer is being thrown at me tonight LOL i need a breaaaak

[ahollowgrave]

Hiiii do you have any more writings or musings about None? I was in your writing tag the other night and they came up a couple times but I'm not sure if I should be picturing a miqo'te or some sort of service animal/familiar lol

Hello! That's so fair, my Odette writings do not offer a lot of description for them! They do have their own tag [HERE] although not much is in it, currently. Some of the screenshots I'm including here and the writings which you've already seen! I'm very sorry for how rambling this is but None is where a lot of alts and relationships spawn from! None is neither a miqo'te nor a service animal (though I think they'd give a huff at the title)! None is the saddest creature in the whole world, a widower, Odette's favorite lil guy, Gerry's estranged step-parent, and a Lalafell:

A Lalafell ranger who makes their living guiding people through the Shroud. These days they are 'mostly' retired. They're well past their middle age and when they were younger they made a deal with sylphs. To be fleet-footed and quick and the best hunter. It came with some side effects:

They wear a hat to cover the ears. It's a bit silly to have two sets and, frankly, None doesn't wanna talk about it. They are stoic, pragmatic, and a bit of a hermit when they can afford it. None is a widower, their late wife was an duskwight woman named Aloutte, who was a widow herself with a young child; Geraldine. None and Gerry were never close and in the wake of Aloutte's passing that distant only grew. None and Odette met at the Menphina temple she was raised at. The Sisters there offer grief counseling and when Aloutte first fell sick she made them go to make the transition easier. A child at the time, Odette was obsessed from the moment they met. A pale shadow trailing after them. Where None failed with Gerry, they bonded with Odette. After Aloutte's passing None returned to the temple to live long term, some grievers need more support than others, they and Odette spent a lot of time together. They very much fill a uncle/aunt role for Odette; a trusted advisor who isn't the adults who raised her. When Odette took her vows and started to travel it was None who traveled with her, taught her basic outdoors skills, bought her Beauty and taught her how to care for chocobos. When Odette has to leave her flock of karakul to travel it is None she calls to care for them. Also, while Aloutte's loss and the grief that follows is very important to None as a character I feel it is important to note they were the saddest creature in the whole world before they knew the warmth of Aloutte's embrace! Sometimes you're just born with a heavy heart, you know? Because of how important they are to Odette. Odile... fucking hates their guts. Oooh, she hates their guts so much!!! The feeling is mutual and Odile and None have come to blows a few times. Something they both keep from Odette; None because they don't want to make her worry, Odile because she'll use the information to drive a wedge at some point. None also features in Odette's WoL AU, they're an honorary scion and spend most of their time with the other off-screen members. They spend time with Krile and Tatatru discussing lalafell things and I like to imagine that F'lhaminn and None have a lot to talk about. This is... pretty long so I will stop here! But I hope this satisfies some curiosity about None and thank you SO MUCH for asking about them!

[spoonietimelordy]

I've talked about it many times, but every time I see someone intrumentalising the holocaust to defend the actions of Israel, I get sick. I literally feel like I'm gonna throw up every time I fall on someone doing that.

[foldingfittedsheets]

Making sure to reblog art this morning so people know I’m not just a little pickle freak.

[atlastseason]

"I'm Still here..."

CW: Health Issues, Trauma, Depression, Isolation

I was sitting on this for some time, but I managed to get it done and make a post about it. I'm not usually share my well-being or personal life on the internet, but I need to get this out so that I can move on with my life.

I'm feeling better now. Still need to visit doctor from time to time. It's a long-term process. Nothing serious for now.

Despite everything, I'm still here...

Thank you for reading. Back to draw silly cartoon.

[mysteriouseggsbenedict]

I'm not in the path of the eclipse this time, but in 2017 I got my driver's license on the day of the eclipse. I took the test like right as it was barely getting started. The instructor said that he had to block off the hour after my test so nobody is driving during the eclipse, but I was able to scrape by.

So after I passed the test we immediately went to go view the eclipse in the church parking lot and it was like the universe sending me a prize :)

[horn-of-leo]

[vynnyal]

A little something like this, right?