#my poor sad blorbo

[willow-774]

I wrote a small fanfic based on a headcanon I liked

Crosshair woke up and gazed around the room and noticed some things were missing. Where was Echo’s hammock and all our tallies of completed missions? And, why don't I remember anything up to the battle with General Billaba? Where's my vod’e? Did they leave me here all of a sudden? He raised a hand to his head. Why does it hurt? GOOD SOLDIERS FOLLOW ORDERS. What was that? Why isn't anyone there? It's almost like they've been decommissioned. No, the Kaminoans wouldn't do that, we're too valuable to them, right? He could feel his heart start to race as he called out for his brothers hoping and praying to the force that they were okay. “HUNTER? WRECKER? TECH? ANYBODY? WHERE ARE YOU?” He felt tears start to stream down his face as he called to his brothers begging them to come help him stop this awful voice in his head. “PLEASE, I'M SORRY FOR WHATEVER I DID! PLEASE COME BACK.” The insidious voices got louder until it started to drown out his own thoughts. Soon his cries were stifled as the voice in his head started to overcome him until he finally– and some would say thankfully–blacked out.

CT-9904 woke up, got out of bed, dressed, and got ready as he shaved. He felt the lingering feeling that something was wrong but he dismissed it as good soldiers follow orders, not feelings.

[iilmunchkiin]

EIGHTEEN? SAD? WHY YOU SO SAD BOY

IM NOT KIDDING, LOOK AT HOW MANY SAD PORTRAITS THIS MAN HAS COMPARED TO EVERYONE ELSE

Everyone has 5-6 sad sprites..

AND THEN THERE'S DALV.

I WAS WRONG IT'S NOT 18.... IT'S A WHOPPING 22 SAD SPRITES

LITERALLY HALF OF HIS EXPRESSIONS IS JUST HIM LITERALLY BEING SAD WHLJASHDHASDHASJ 💔💔💔

SOMEONE SAVE HIM PLEASE .·´¯`(>▂<)´¯`·.

[honeyvanity]

maybe i'm missing some camp dialogue here (entirely possible since i spend more time running around the map hunting woodpeckers and saving maidens than at camp) but. do we have a "i'm dying" or "i'm sick" or "i've got tuberculosis" scene w arthur. or ANYTHING. i feel like they just Know at one moment but it's so vague? i didn't even realize the gang knew until the first reference i could find was strauss (STRAUSS) saying he's sorry for arthur in the money lending quest. like i very much needed a scene like that and maybe some more reactions idk? i realize you got your own problems n all but damn. can u ask him if he's okay or whatever. jesus.

[secretmellowblog]

You know how Nick/Gatsby and Holmes/Watson and Enjolras/Grantaire are super popular gay classic lit ships? I’m genuinely surprised there’s not a slash-shipping community around Sydney Carton and Charles Darnay from a Tale of Two Cities…like. I get the reason Darnay/Carton isn’t popular is because no one cares about A Tale of Two Cities but their relationship is so bizarrely homoerotic for literally no reason! It’s like Built to be some Dark Academia tumblr ship! I think Carton/Darnay should be in the tumblr gay classic lit canon, repping Dickens and the way Dickens’ misogynistic inability to write convincing heterosexual relationships results in his characters seeming extremely gay.

I could write an entire essay on why A Tale of Two Cities makes more sense if you ignore Dickens’ intent and read Carton as gay (with quotes supporting my point) but like. Carton insists he’s in love with Darnay’s wife Lucie but spends much more of his page-time talking to/flirting with Darnay (to the point where he’s never had an on page conversation with Lucie until he “confesses his love” to her in a scene where he also immediately rejects himself for her, and insists that their relationship would be Impossible for Reasons and that his heart isn’t Capable of feeling things the way it should, as if he’s chosen to convince himself he’s in love with her because she’s unattainable and he will never have to be in a relationship with her.) Darnay and Carton have all these tense charged snarky interactions that feel like fanfic. Darnay’s thing with Lucie is pretty bland but there’s this huge emphasis on the fact that he and Carton are “counterparts.” Whenever Dickens tries to write Carton as being sad that Lucie loves another man it generally comes across as Carton being jealous of Lucie, because he’s almost never had a full conversation with Lucie and spends most of his time instead having these very sad clingy desperate pathetic conversations with the men who love her. Carton has a weird homoerotic thing going on with his jock law partner Stryver, who he sacrifices everything for and spends all his time with and lets invade his personal space/walk all over him for reasons he refuses to explain (all while Stryver repeatedly mocks Carton for being incapable of falling in love with women). Carton ultimately sacrifices his life for Darnay by forcibly taking off Darnay’s clothes and disguising himself as him….like?

One of their first interactions is Carton heroically saving Darnay’s life, then drunkenly calling himself Darnay’s “counterpart” and asking him on a date.

Like.

Hm.

This feels like the banter you’d find in an Enjolras/Grantaire fanfic:

Fellas is it gay to

But yeah! The main thing people remember about A Tale of Two Cities are the cool peasant women revolutionaries, who Dickens is trying to portray as villains but who are actually the best characters in the book. And if I’m going to be mean to my high school self (who was obsessed with ATOTC for some reason) I’d say that the central melodrama between Carton/Darnay/Lucie is a weakness of the novel because Carton’s arc has nothing to do with the political French Revolution stuff, so his sacrifice feels thematically disconnected from all the book’s attempts at political commentary. HOWEVER. I think it works better if it’s gay.Also the Vengeance and Madame Defarge are gay, but people aren’t ready for that conversation!

So yee!! people on tumblr love ships that are like “hot goody-two-shoes classic lit boy in a suit x hot snarky classic lit sadboi in a suit”, but so few ppl remember Carton and Darnay, who were repping that all the way back in the 1790s 😔😔😔😔😔

[returnofahsoka]

"i said: i care if i am guilty! i care if i am guilty!

god was silent. everything was silent."

[redversaillesrose]

Honestly the worst thing about vampires is how disgustingly rich they are. Generational wealth on steroids. Yada yada metaphors you are thirsting over a landlord, Carolina.

[generalthirst]

PSA

I'm still here! This blog is technically still active; I just went through a spell of writer's block on top of going through months of illness.

I won't make any promises of posting, but I'm going to try to soon. Maybe starting with little drabbles and headcanons. Requests are welcomed, might even motivate me to write if I'm being honest!

[jonathanbyersphd]

Do y'all ever think about how when we're first introduced to Jonathan he's alone in the shot. But in s2 &s3 his first scenes are with Nancy. Then in s4 he's alone again or am I the problem?

[alamari-chibi]

everyone's all 'i love him he's sad and wet and miserable' or 'he's so scrungly like a stray kitten you found in the garbage' or 'he's so pathetic and mopey' where is the love for boy-o's who are bright and excited for life and silly and happy and trying their best

[songofsaraneth]

okay now you, top 5 rote characters? 👀

ohoho OKAY here we go

5. while none individually are in my top single characters i actually do wanna give this place to the Dragons, collectively, because they were why i picked up the universe in the first place. I was working my way through books with dragons in them and actually read the Rain Wilds books first (because someone told me they worked standalone) and while I think this series is the weakest in the RotE universe now that I've read the rest, it got me interested enough in the worldbuilding to go back to the start and see what was up with Tintaglia and those serpents and ships and whatnot. I like that they're haughty and entitled and annoying. RotE dragons are much more like cats in personality than anything else, which was a nice change from the themes i was getting in the other books i worked through of 1. beasts to be dominated or 2. wise and mysteriously good/kind with very little complexity to that despite being, you know, huge apex predators.

4. KETTRICKEN. god im OBSESSED with the mountain kingdom and their concept of ruling... my love my queen my Sacrifice... uhg I love how much she grows from angry angsty girl into a monarch. and she never lets go of her mountain concept of rulership despite spending way more of her life in the duchies surrounded by people who'd love for her to step back and do less. but what really makes her my personal blorbo is the way she comforts Fitz when no one else is paying enough to attention to realize how close to breakdown he is at any given point. Hugging him. Drugging him to make sure he has a good nights sleep. Like she was the ONLY ONE who TRULY wept with him for Nighteyes and understood what that loss meant to him, not just because she had her own bond with Nighteyes but knew Fitz's went so much deeper than hers and that he wouldn't take the space to grieve that loss when needed on his own. Kettricken just... cares. about people, about the kingdom, about everything, and does what she can for them.

3-2-1 im cheating im cheating im cheating and my top 3 are of course a 3-way-tie of THE trio, Nighteyes, the Fool, and Fitz. honestly how could they not be 😭 i love them in part because i love what they each are to the other... like everyone else from Fitz's early life hurt him in terrible ways (Burrich, Chade, Verity, Shrewd... fuck man) but he imprinted on them anyway, because he was a sad scared lonely child who had just been ripped away from everything he knew. as soon as he got 1 singular crumb of kindness from anyone he fell into full devotion even when what they had him do was to his own detriment, again and again. And it's the person who is SUPPOSED to be the one pushing him into certain paths, watching him fall into prophecy and die who, counter to what you'd think, is not that kind of person. The Fool is the one who is most painfully aware of everything Fitz can do and how to point him towards it but he always somehow gives Fitz a choice about it, not an order or demand. And Nighteyes bonds to Fitz and is the one true, solid bond where he's not trying to use Fitz for anything, he just wants them to both Be. And selflessly gives up the kind of life they could have had together, with other wolves or other witted, for Fitz's sake. It's funny that these two relationships for Fitz are almost opposite in a way... he and Nighteyes are so entwined that even other Witted are disturbed by how close they are, and how little they have reserved for themselves. Meanwhile Fitz spends so many books trying to keep the Fool at arm's length despite how powerfully they are drawn back to each other again and again. Fitz throws himself into Nighteyes as a way to escape himself, but can't bear to let himself get too close to the Fool because he's afraid of what that bond would mean with another human, especially one he perceives as male. And it takes him sooooooo many books to finally get past that but thas growth baby! Anyway that difference makes it funny to me how Nighteyes/the Fool comparatively very quickly settle into a comfortable dynamic. Nighteyes accepts the Fool as part of their Pack, the Fool accepts Nighteyes as an integral part of Fitz, and they get on with keeping each other warm in the woods while trying to manage Fitz's much more complicated problems. uhg they are all my own Beloved.

[lenin-it-to-win-it]

Nabokov is like “I will write a character so pitiful and easily driven to madness. It is inconceivable that anyone could possibly relate to and/or like this sad, wretched little man” and then just give him an unending list of autistic traits

[erinaceina]

I am very much feeling the Lan Xichen/peace & healing OTP this morning.

[juliaanoia]

Did I do it? Did I create a tumblr sexyman?

[craftybookworms]

You know how sometimes you find a new series binge it all in one night and then it ends on a cliffhanger that stomps on your heart and makes you want to tear your hair out?

that’s me my brain is bouncing around my skull right now and WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO THEM hhffcgdfdgfxdsgfhdrggjfhgnvmvngn

[catcatb0y]

Idk man a big disconnect I have especially with online conversations is the one where I'm like 'I will suck on purpose'. I talk about myself the way that you would talk about a deranged blorbo you love to hate, hate to love.

These plots are so BAD! My writing SUCKS!

This is so sad I cannot believe I am ugly af 😔 Oh well lol!

I am so annoying to talk to bro.

Like if I am not overdramatic and over the top about how life KICKS THE KIT!! Oh!!! Jail for life!! Jail for life for... about twenty more years I don't wanna be here that long l o l- if I'm not that then I'm sad.

I'll say it to anyone who will listen "Be careful what you repeat, because you will internalize it," and, yeah, if you're always saying "Nobody likes me," it ends up being a self fufilling prophecy.

If you say you're not talented, then you'll never appreciate your work and it will always feel lacking. If you call yourself names, then you will always be those names. If you only ever make jokes about wanting to die- serious or not, you will feel them (and also no one will want to be around you).

But also, if I don't say that I'm 'annoying on purpose', then I'll leave the conversation feeling like I fucked up. If I don't make jokes about being a walking ball of trauma, then I'm going to feel really awkward when I slip up and mention something hella traumatic. If I don't jokingly call myself ugly in the same tone I use to mock my favorite characters, then I'm always going to feel gross in pictures or underwhelmed when I dress up in fun outfits.

If I don't mock my own suffering, then all I can do is suffer.

If I don't joke about how it's a shame every one ends up ghosting me, then I sit there. At my computer. I sit and I wonder why no one bothers to text first. I sit there and I think about all of the people who claimed to be so close then just disappeared one day. I think about all of the nice things that I've ever been told and all of the lies that have come with them, and the line gets so, so blurry...

[orphudice]

so the chapter three post execution got released anf things happened that i feel like talking about.......