#my preschool was pretty good but so fucking weird

[mintaikk]

I love how everyone has that defining moment in their childhood when they first realized/saw that the opposite sex has different looking genitals. I never had that moment because no one in my preschool knew how to shut the God damn doors when pissing

[readingbythestreetlights]

mattdrai fic recs - masterlist

always check the warnings and tags for yourself before reading!! i will probably update this whenever i find a new mattdrai fic i really really enjoy, so be on the lookout if you’re interested!!

by request of @keyshui @whirlpool-blogs & @capsvsducks

medium-to-long fics (in no particular order):

1. slip under the tongue into translation by lighthousetowers ~ 32.2k words ~ mature: the quintessential mattdrai fic, at least in my mind. the vibes are wonderful, the chemistry is palpable, matthew learns german.

2. gather your broken lessons and move by rumandwhine ~ 30.4k words ~ explicit: cathartic, set in the 2028-2029 season, mattdrai figures some stuff out, davo does some best-friending.

3. comment for engagement by RippingOffZeppelin ~ 27.9k words ~ mature: matthew makes a youtube channel for PR purposes. a fic i had so so much fun reading. pretty lighthearted.

4. head above water by yourblues ~ 91.1k words ~ explicit: as far as i’m concerned, this is canon. this fic will make you feel every emotion. the slow burn and enemies to lovers hits hard. by far one of my favorites on this list. it’s a necessary read for any mattdrai fan, and i’ve personally reread it countless times. iconic quotes, iconic story, iconic scenes. i want this story to be engraved on my headstone when i die. also make sure to check out the author’s playlist on spotify after— it’s wonderful.

5. Growing Into Someone by blaahaj ~ 46.4k words ~ explicit: matthew goes to germany during the lockout… leon’s already there. these two figuring out their stuff in a foreign country *chef’s kiss*— a truly fantastic fic that i adore. the slow burn slow burns for sure.

6. Muscle Memory by blaahaj ~ 21.9k words ~ mature: i don’t even like most amnesia fics, but i love this one. memory loss on matthew’s side. this view of mattdrai is so cool while they learn to love each other again.

7. but please (don’t) bite by orphan_account ~ 52.7k words ~ mature: an alternate reality where leon and matthew were unprotected and thus drafted by the kraken. the slow burn sure slow burns (if i remember correctly). also features some cool cameos by one of the lomls: the wonderful braden holtby.

8. Nothing Good Happens After 2 A.M. by irrelevanttous ~ 11.9k words ~ mature: leon slips up and tells matthew he loves him. matthew does some thinking. cool take on how they got together.

9. The Day Leon Draisaitl Swore Never To Buy Another Apple Product Again by irrelevanttous ~ 9.3k words ~ explicit: mattdrai figuring their crap out kinda, lotsa spice. smexy with a plot??

10. the kids are alright by lighthousetowers ~ 55.8k words ~ mature: matthew is a preschool teacher, leon’s still an oiler, a meet-cute and adorable romance ensue! the characterization is so cool, as it dives deeper in than just “matthew’s a nuisance, leon’s serious and slightly moody” and shows the two of them in a relatively new light. an amazing and enjoyable read!! plus, this is one of my favorite authors!!

shorter fics (in no particular order):

1. i got a bad idea by canoodles ~ 5.5k words ~ explicit: from the 2020 all-star game onwards. as the author put it: leon accidentally fucks himself into a relationship with the enemy. those early mattdrai vibes when they were both still in alberta.

2. A Reunion, a Beginning, and the Thief of Awkward Silences by puckedup ~ 3.3k words ~ mature: leon misses matthew being in alberta. they play each other in florida and things happen. some chirping (flirting???) (it’s hard to tell with these two) and overall a fun story.

3. sweet like honey by indydriver ~ 3.6k words ~ teen and up: chirping, flirting, and the gray area that exists between those two things. fun and lighthearted.

4. retrograde by ohtempora ~ 1.5k words ~ mature: leon’s first time in matthew’s florida house. matthew is learning to adjust sorta kinda. the author describes it perfectly in their author’s note, about how florida’s weird vibes transferred to the fic itself. it’s so wonderfully written with a super consistent tone and a really interesting view into matthew transitioning from calgary to florida.

5. found arms to fall right into by orphan_account ~ 6.3k words ~ mature: just super fun, matthew and leon are sort of fake maybe-dating??? this fic also has perfect amounts of brady and davo. a really enjoyable story that i really really recommend.

6. Hourglass Theory by puckedup ~ 1.3k words ~ not rated: fluffy, soft, soft boys. aftermath of mitchy and chucky’s lil brawl and pietrangelo’s slash on leon.

7. Emergency Contact by blaahaj ~ 1.8k words ~ teen and up: funnyyyy, quick chick flick, just a fun little mattdrai moment, established mattdrai.

8. Privileged Information by blaahaj ~ 3k words ~ teen and up: sequel to Growing Into Someone. fun fluff and an enjoyable little snippet/add-on to the series.

9. what my heart just yearns to say by puckthisshift ~ 6.3k words ~ mature: as the author aptly puts it: idiots to lovers. matthew understands some german dirty talk, shenanigans ensue. a super fun, quick read.

10. cut by daisysusan ~ 2k words ~ teen and up: established relationship, the writing style is SO GOOD, matthew and leon’s chemistry is tangible, alternate 2023 playoffs, the two are just adorable with each other.

11. In Which Leon Recognizes Tkachuk in a Dick Pic and Has Some Explaining to Do (But Only to Himself) by irrelevanttous ~ 8.1k words ~ mature: oilers shenanigans, jealous drat, realizations, davo being the best bff, a fun fic.

12. Should’ve Given You a Reason to Stay by scruffylou ~ 1k words ~ not rated: super short, a bit emotional, aftermath of matthew signing with the cats.

13. portions for foxes by wheelsnipecellysboys ~ 5.2k words ~ explicit: the chemistry is so well-written— i love the two of them in this story. sexy times and also emotions. matthew in florida and the 2023 asg.

14. break the news (you’re walking out) by kiwilies ~ 1.5k words ~ teen and up: such a captivating writing style. perfectly showcases the tension of moving from a location you’ve known for years to somewhere brand new. such an interesting dynamic between leon and matthew, while at a bit more than 1k words, doesn’t dive extremely deep into their relationship. very enjoyable fic that has a lot of artistry implemented by the author. so so cool.

[gabessquishytum]

Dubcon mating with alpha dream except hob knows EXACTLY what hes doing:) hob has been all but throwing himself at dream all semester all "ohh wow i would NEVER leave MY alpha like that.. too bad i dont even have one :(" hell cut it as close as possible going to class through his pre heat just to hopefully give dream a wiff of how slick and fertile he is. Dream does not seem to notice. But hob is one of the few omegas in the school this year so hob thinks his chances are pretty good to be able to get him in rut. He follows dream to his office all smug and confident. But he wasnt prepared for how overwhelming getting held down and rut fucked was!! Hes trying to crawl away despite himself but only gets hornier when dream physically drags him back. Hob has fooled around before but never done more than some over the clothes stuff with an actual alpha.. dream gives him his first knot and latches his teeth to the back of his neck to mate him as well. Hob is a bit teary and dream still hasnt come back to himself.. his pants were ripped off his body along with his underwear but dream lays on top of him so hes not cold. Hob is determined to keep his alpha though. Hes got his gym clothes in his bag and he drags dream off to his own room, planning to hide long enough that the bond solidifies and an emergency break wouldn't be possible anymore :) good thing dream isnt awake to make hob see someone for that!! Hes got a weird sense of honor and hob is doing all he can to make the bond permanent before dream can get in his way :)

-🔪

Oh YES. Sneaky, sneaky Hob. This is excellent.

Hob is ambitious, ok? He’s been told all his life that he’ll never get anywhere or be anything. He sees it as his job to prove people wrong. So he has a plan: put himself through uni, get a fantastic fucking job, and get himself the most eligible alpha he can find.

Not necessarily in that order.

Dream is just perfect. Clever, rich, handsome. Hob can’t understand why anyone would leave him, but he’s not complaining. With Dream’s previous mating bond gone, Hob is free to make his move. He’s a little scared of how it will work out, but Dream has been nice to him and shown an interest in Hob! Not in a sexual way, but that’s only because he’s too professional. Hob is sure that Dream won’t object to them being mated. Hob isn’t the perfect omega, but he’ll do his best. He’s (mostly) a virgin, and he plans to take good care of his alpha. What more could Dream want?

And once he becomes lucid again, Dream is surprisingly compliant. He doesn’t seem angry. He panics at first, but once Hob assures him that he wanted Dream to fuck him and mate him, he just kind of… accepts it. He takes Hob home to his big empty house. He just seems pleased to have an omega around the place!

Hob gets his comeuppance for his sneakiness, because the house isn’t entirely empty. Dream soon introduces Hob to… his son. Orpheus is preschool aged and spends his time split between Dream and Calliope’s homes. Hob is suddenly thrust into the role of step-parent to a child who could conceivably be his sibling, while Dream breathes a sigh of relief because he really needs all the help he can get with Orpheus.

But Hob doesn’t believe in giving up! He rolls up his sleeves (figuratively and literally), speedily reads a couple of websites about blended families, and decides that he’s going to be the best fucking step-parent anyone has ever seen. He does regret his underhanded behaviour a tiny bit, but he’s made his bed and now he’s going to lie in it.

And he still gets to ride Dream’s dick at the end of the day, so… it could be a lot worse. Every time Dream grabs him at the waist and pulls him back onto his cock, shoving his knot more firmly into his hole, Hob remembers how it all started… and he’s honestly really looking forward to his next heat. Dream fucked him so good in his rut, so Hob is pretty sure that spending a pheromone loaded heat with him is going to be amazing. And maybe they’ll even make a little sibling for Orpheus :D

[x-manson-annotated]

X-Manson Annotated Chapter Three - Part 9 - THE ACCUSATION

I'm going to level with you. If you weren't already put off by this story, this section might seal the deal for you. This section deals with Emma Frost being placed at the center of a scandal where she is accused of sexually abusing her students. It's awful, but it is integral to understanding the world of this story. This will be the last section of Chapter 3.

tw for that, and tw for mentions of attempted suicide.

I'd like to know who this "Weedy Looking Man" is. My assumption is it is the X-Manson version of Trevor Fitzroy.

Like i said, this section isn't pretty. I am of the mindset that nothing happened, but this section will bring to the mind of some people the Satanic Panic and Q Anon conspiracy theories popular among the right wing.

Shinobi Shaw, the son of Sebastian Shaw.

*also, Doug and Marie-Ange are insufferably cute.

**Pot's legal in the United States as of 1990.

This feels like an outlandish parody until you realize that conservative media is exactly like that.

"She knew what could happen to teenaged girls" What the fuck does that mean? That feels close to "Well, you saw what she was wearing. She probably wanted it." It's a cryptic, weird thing to say.

This feels like a reflection of something you would see a lot of later in the 2000s. Ultimate Marvel used to do this thing where psychics would read minds and there would be a joke of "Oh, stop thinking about me naked." or "I wasn't thinking about it until you told me not to think about it." Shit like that. This feels like a more realistic take on how that might feel with someone with psychic powers. It isn't some kind of fun jokey thing for them. It's horrifying.

*I'm detecting a reoccurring argument between them with this line from Marie-Ange.

**That's an incredibly strange way to speak about someone, Douglas.

***She's not wrong for thinking that.

But let's focus on the thirteen students who put forward accusations against Emma.

I can't imagine who they might be. Possibly this world's version of the Hellions, sans Marie-Ange?

What were they arrested for?

Holy shit, Disney is not pissing around when it comes to copyright in this universe.

This makes sense about why Xavier kept his class sizes on the smaller end. Easier for him to be more personable and manipulate the students.

I wonder how much of that is coincidental and how much of it was orchestrated by Xavier.

The system failing to work.

She finds it difficult to maintain romantic connections if she doesn't have access to her psi-ablities? Difficulty reading the emotions of others? Autistic Emma Frost?

A full lobotomy with a gun killed her psychic abilities?

It's interesting that there are still mutant education systems in place in public schools.

I have no idea who this man is meant to be.

Also the "Roy Cohn Professor of American History" Roy Cohn? like the lawyer and all-around bastard who adored Joe McCarthy.

The Hinckley Law. This immediately puts me in mind of the attempted assassination of Ronald Reagan by John Hinckley Jr. Reagan was never Presiden in this Au, so is it possible that Hinckley attempted to assassinate him when he was running for Governer of California?

Furthermore...Did Ronald Reagan destroy Hinckley's personality?

You can tell this is fantasy because the American Left is presenting a unified front against Conservatism.

Mary Jo Kopechne was a mutant with gills!

The pear-shaped man is Sebastian Shaw. This feels like an accurate way to describe the man.

I feel like the molestations stopped around when Emma took over the school. Good god.

Sebastian, his nose heavy with clotted phlegm and coke: how can any red-blooded American man learn in the company of disgusting WHEMEN!

This feels like something from the McMartin Pre-School Scandal where kids were essentially coerced by law enforcement into making up bigger and bigger lies about satanic ritual abuse.

Example Below from the McMartin Preschool Trial's wikipedia page:

Some of the abuse was alleged to have occurred in secret tunnels beneath the school. Several excavations turned up evidence of old buildings on the site and other debris from before the school was built, but no evidence of any secret chambers or tunnels was found. There were claims of orgies at car washes and airports, and of children being flushed down toilets to secret rooms where they would be abused, then cleaned up and presented back to their parents.

The Cuban cigar angle feels like a nod to the Clinton-Lewinsky scandal.

*This reads like a modern day Trumper losing his shit.

**If you cared about your family's "Good Name" you wouldn't have named your son "Shinobi" you insufferable goddamn weeaboo.

Sebastian: the rich of america are entitled to live as kings! We are not unlike gods!

The mad philosopher Scalia. Is Antonin Scalia a supervillain in this universe?

*Again, you can tell this is a fantasy because we have the misfortune of having had Scalia on the Supreme Court.

Insane.

"That he knew of". I want to know more about what kind of Anti-Psi protection exists in this world.

All this kind of bums me out. I mean, i guess i'm happy about an au where Doug's doing kind of alright after a tragedy. But him becoming this big tech bro kind of sucks to me.

It's kind of cool that he turned Apple into a co-op. I guess.

[apostateoverrubies]

You know, I am fucking grateful that I was born in the 2000s. Like, the only fucking decade I wouldn't mind being born in is the fucking 1990s and that's purely because the internet would still be there just in time to shape me as a person.

I don't want to be that fucking person who thinks they want to be born in decades like the 80s, 70s, 60s etc because I know I'm purely in it for the aesthetic.

If I were born around those decades, I'd be a much different person and I would hate the person I'd become.

This is why I hate it when people from older generations romanticize their childhoods, talking about how everything was so good and everyone was so nice to each other etc.

When I look back at my childhood with what I know now, I realize there are a lot of fucked up things about it.

How Christianity has been shoved down our throats since preschool even though it wasn't tied to any church and some children weren't Christian at all.

How my dad beat me mercilessly with a belt because I was unable to recite Gentle Jesus on my own. Prayer is important was his reasons. But I was still in preschool.

How grown-ups would threaten to cut off my thumb because I hadn't yet stopped sucking it.

How I was pretty much allowed to not do anything up until my late primary school years yet the grown-ups in my life blamed me for their lack of effort.

How I only had one true friend in primary school because contrary to what some adults would have you believe, not everyone was friendly and kind, especially when you were the weird kid.

I can go on and on because it doesn't end there.

Sure, I have my gripes on certain things about this generation and there are things about my childhood I love.

But I'm grateful that folks in my generation and the ones after have internet access. It's not perfect obviously. Plenty of bad stuff happen on the internet.

But it was thanks to that internet access that I was able to be the person I am now. Because when the internet is good, it's REALLY good.

I've met my dearest friends on there, I found tutorials that help me improve my skills, I found things that challenged the views my culture tried to force down my throat that led to me not only coming to terms with and embracing my sexuality and femininity.

I recently left religion behind because I was able to learn how much it didn't make sense and conflicted with my morals.

I was able to become more compassionate than I had ever been I could see the injustices people have to suffer and I learned to understand people I would've scoffed at if not outright discriminated against.

Anyways, I'm done rambling now. It's funny how people think the internet makes us appreciate life less but I am so fucking grateful for being alive right now.

[autumn-foxfire]

Time for the preschool episodes! And I will focus on baby Ran and baby Shinichi and not the forced romance (although I can't promise that I won't complain about Gosho making Shinichi love Ran since he was fucking four).

LMAO Ran is pretty blunt: Yeah when I met Shinichi I hated his guts!

Damn Kogoro has always been a bad parent, it seems. Just ditching the moment he fucked up and leaving it up to Eri to fix.

Awww baby Ran and Sonoko are adorable. And Sonoko has always been Ran's biggest defender, as she should be. I love her. And she's so upset that she damaged her new badge when she got it back T-T No wonder Ran would kill for Sonoko just as Sonoko would kill for Ran.

Did Yukiko and Yusaku just not try and teach Shinichi how to socialise with others? Probably not. This is probably the first time he's got to actually socialize with children their own age.

Damn, Ran could stand up for herself as a child, what happened to that when she's an adult.

Gosho kids don't talk like this. If you're going to write four year olds, spend some time at a preschool and actually watch them.

Okay, Shinichi is just wary of an adult behaving strangely which isn't too odd considering he's a very smart child who is raised by a man who freelances as a detective from time to time and has taken him to crime scenes before, it's no wonder he's suspicious.

Shinichi has always been a little shit, huh. He's adorable.

He saw Ran being bullied and did what he believed to be the best way to make sure she wouldn't be anymore but he was too blunt about it and Ran misunderstood his intentions.

Sera can we not. He was a little kid, he didn't want to impress a girl, he wanted to MAKE A FRIEND. Not to mention he made a friend with what he loves, mysteries, his special interest.

Shinichi is a genius. He's just reading such an advanced book and he's four.

Shinichi doesn't like raisins. Noting that down.

LMAO and he's looking for a library because of course he is.

WHAT MOVIES ARE YUSAKU AND YUKIKO LETTING SHINICHI WATCH?!

He just wanted to show off how good he is at deduction, his special interest, like how a child will show off a new toy to try and make a new friends.

And he was drawn to her because she didn't react the way he read like in books, which is probably his only frame of reference on how to properly socialize.

Shinichi was so happy to recieve attention the way he did. It could just be because he's a kid but I also fear it's because he doesn't get that attention from his parents. When your kid does something incredibly, most parents would praise them, but we've seen from Yusaku that when Shinichi shows him how incredible he can be, he usually uses the opportunity to knock him down a couple of pegs.

Shinichi: This adult was behaving weirdly to a child and it concerns me!

Adults with rotted brains: Are you sure you're just not in "love" and are just jealous because it's a member of the opposite sex? Nevermind you are just four and have never had friends before and are just naturally concerned about adults displaying weird behaviour like we told you to be.

Yusaku, you are very much dressed like a child snatcher, I would be wary.

Thankfully Yusaku actually did take Shinichi seriously.

He actually prevented a kidnapping from happening.

Nevermind, Yusaku is a bad parent.

YOU TOLD YOUR CHILD SON TO PREVENT A CHILD FROM BEING KIDNAPPED. YOU KNOW, THE KIND OF PERSON THE KIDNAPPER WANTS! I know they're targeting female children but you never know what could happen if they're desperate.

Did Yusaku write about lesbians?

That's my headcanon now.

NO SERA. HE HAS NOT. HE. WAS. FOUR.

Shinichi, you mistook a chance for friendship as romantic because everyone around you told you otherwise even though you WERE TRYING TO PREVENT BULLYING AND THEN A KIDNAPPING.

Shinichi: I don't know this girl and I'm madly in love with her.

Me and the rest of the fandom: Dying of laughter and pity for the boy who had no friends and mistook friendship for romance.

[nightshade-and-frogs-breath]

I myself am entirely made of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.

basic info about me:

@taking-whats-not-yours -> @for-the-throat

names: Crybaby/Theory/Wirt/Victor/Wylan/Jesper/Spike/Ellis/Auggie/Barr-el/Lock/Orpheus/Seth (Vic, Theo, or Vicky are okay too :) )

nonbinary- he/they/blur

sexuality: probably aroacespec I don’t fucking know at this point 💀

I do have a writing specialty (aka my guilty pleasure), which are sickfics and whump, most of the time for specific characters.

!!Please note that I am a minor!!! (so y’know don’t be weird)

the dni criteria is pretty basic (dni if you’re ableist, racist, homophobic, etc.)

cringe culture is not a thing, fuck that

sideblogs, because I get bored: @seths-still-talking-somehow (main sideblog), @sankta-inej-the-pirate-queen (Inej themed sideblog) @kazbrekkers-left-eyelash (Kaz-themed sideblog), @a-sacred-ash-tree (Matthias sideblog) @i-kinda-like-your-stupid-face (Jesper sideblog) @the-queen-of-mourning (Nina sideblog), @not-all-poisons-have-an-antidote (Wylan sideblog)

some of my awesome amazing oh-so-talented mutuals!!!- @sorebelflower , @aestophobia , @willsperotruther

some of my interests:

Six of Crows

Bungou Stray Dogs (current hyperfixation)

Hadestown

Ramshackle

(things I’m still interested in but less interested)

ENA

The Stanley Parable

Ride the Cyclone

BSD RP blogs I run:

Kenji Miyazawa ( @undefeated-by-the-storm )

Ace ( @my-madness-lieswithin-thesecards )

Poe (17) ( @black-cat-inthe-ruemorgue )

Akutagawa (BEAST) ( @dont-chase-the-beast )

Spade (OC) ( @seventh-of-trades )

Ethan (Spade) (OC) ( @third-in-the-deck )

Royalty AU Spade ( @shovel-and-arrow )

Eloise Lucian ( @get-necromanced )

Preschool AU Eloise (4) ( @itty-bitty-necromancer )

Circus AU Yosano ( @the-magician-is-in )

Media Industry AU Dazai ( @just-take-the-photo-mackerel )

Stageplay Kunikida ( @doppo-idealist-poet )

asks are always open!!

Tags:

vic’s reblogging again: basically what it sounds like lol

vicky’s being emo again: vent/rant tag

vicky answers: answering asks!

victor’s dumb thoughts: stuff that I talk about

eye boy 🧿, connie candy 🍬, dark jade 🧷, stargazer ⚰️, finley 🕸: mutual tags

DONATION LINKS:

https://gofund.me/bc721399

[star-mum]

the ages in Teen Wolf make no fucking sense and the MTV writers made it MY ISSUES SPECIFICALLY

insane rambling (and very bad math) under the cut

I was thinking.... the Hales weren't recluses ??? (post fire Derek doesn't count, he's been through stuff) cause Derek went to highschool like normal ??? So WHYYYY (besides convenient writing) doesn't ANYONE REMEMBER THEM ??????

Like yeah Derek was older than the main cast, whatever, but CORA ????? SHE'S THEIR AGE ???? THEY PROBABLY ALL WENT TO PRESCHOOL TOGETHER ???? AT LEAST MIDDLE SCHOOL ????

SO !!! i have JUST NOW decided that Cora, Derek and Laura are 3 years apart from each other. "What about Talia and Peter?" you ask me and if you'd given me a FUCKING SECOND I'D TELL YOU !!! GEEZ !!!

Okay so IF we assume Peter is in his early 20s when Derek is in highschool considering ONLY the actor who played him in the Paige Flashback then okay, fine they're like almost 20 years apart BUT !!! Look at Peter now !!! LOOK AT HIM !!! THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN IN 4-6 YEARS (depending on how old you think s1 Derek is) (we'll get to that too, hold on) SO !!!! Im gonna ignore that weird casting choice and confidently give Talia and Peter a 13 years age difference, why ? you ask... idk sounds like a good number, I like things in 3s- WRONG !!! I DID EXTENSIVE MATH AND THINKING ON THIS !!!

We're gonna take some liberty here and assume Wolf Born Families are a bit traditional when it comes to kids and stuff SO Talia would've probably had her first kid in her very early 20s BUT we also need to consider that she was The Alpha of the house (and I refuse to believe Hale isn't HER family name) (OH ALSO !! Since the spark passed from her to Laura we can assume, cause I want to, that, at least, the Hale Pack worked as a matriarchy) which demands a lot of respect and work soooo I'm gonna go with her being about 24-25 when she had Laura

WHICH !!! Would've made Peter 11-12, which is not that different from the age gap he has with Talia, so he probably used to look at Laura much more as a sister than a niece (you know for the pain and suffering and drama) SO !!! when Derek was 15, Peter was 29-30 aaaand 29 makes the most sense to me, so I'd go with that!

Please dont get me started on the contradicting age of our "teen" cast !! Scott is 15 and then 18 in 10 months ???? Doesn't make sense !!!! So to ME the teen cast is all 17 in season 1 !!! except for Alison who's a year older and very understandably insecure about turning 19 and still being in highschool. And then in the span of 10 months we roll around to Scott's 18 birthday !! hooray time is linear !!!

All this to say, these are all people around the same age as our main characters AND THEY WERE PART OF THE TOWN !!!! HOW COME NO ONE REMEMBERS THEM ????

Even if we operate on the belief that Derek is, during season one, between 19-22 (which feels correct to me) that still makes the family fire NOT THAT LONG AGO (4-6 years) HOW COME PEOPLE ARE FORGETTING ABOUT IT ALREADY ????

Cora is the same age as EVERYBODY ELSE !!!! did they not go to middle school together ? do they not remember her ? who was she friends with ? Before Paige died Derek was very well integrated into High School culture, we have no reason to believe either of his sisters were homeschooled. Peter was a grOWN ADULT !!! I KNOW THE HALES WERE OLD MONEY RICH BUT DID HE NOT HAVE A JOB ???? DID HE NOT HAVE A LAW FIRM TO WORK AT ??? (recently came across a "Peter Hale had a law degree" post and it's canon to me forever now) Did Laura not pick up her siblings from school not a SINGLE DAY OF THEIR LIFE ????

OH !! WHICH REMINDS ME !! Derek said at some point that the fire happened when he and his sister were still at school and I'm pretty sure that was on s1 so he obviously meant Laura (i don't think the writers had Cora planned from the beginning, she was there to work in Erica's place) BUT !!! What if he did mean Cora, he walked his little 12 yo sister to school because he's Big Sister Laura (18 yo) was away for college at that time !!! And Kate had no choice but to leave those 3 out cause Laura wouldn't have come home without a good reason and Cora went to school at the time was Derek just a different building

This brings me to my (hopefully) final point: what the fuck is Deatons problem ???? He was Talia's emissary, he knew the pack inside and out and they very OBVIOUSLY KNEW HIM !!! HE WAS BESIDE THEIR ALPHA ALL THE DAMN TIME !!! How come Derek didn't recognize him ???? My vague memory on the dialogue between Deaton and Peter in s1 makes it seem like they Knew Each Other, in that ominous way... why didn't Derek ?? He wasn't a small child, he knew Deaton too, he could've remembered him ????

Again... things that feel like they were written into the plot only AFTER s1 aired

[courfeyracs-swordcane]

Teddy... after being mutuals w you for who knows how long I NEED to ask... what does robobs mean? I've been paying attention to the tags on my notifs for a bit and I think that's the one thing I still have no clue about ahdkshfjshfjd

OH BOY! You’ve activated my trap card!

Short version: tag for me and the gang ( @nosongunsung11 @coyotefang1987 @wildfandom @lemonade-comet @dogliker73 )’s transformers ocs. When I first made the spreadsheet I titled it ‘Robobs’ and it stuck. In March we made a 120 slide power point explaining the lore and we’ve made like 20 new guys since then

LONG VERSION: (and I’m only getting into blorbos from MY brain bc there’s like 85 of these mfers collectively)(Guys who come in several separate-but-linked subsets)

(edit: now with images! picrews linked here, here, here, and here and art by @orange-artist/@nosongunsung11)

THE OGS:

Packet and Pinch: (turn into biplanes) little guys who came after the war, them and their dad sometimes moonlight on a research vessel called Forte Spes where theoretically they’re archival assistants but mostly what that means is that Pinch holds the microphone during interviews because when Packet was allowed to do that he kept eating it. When they’re a little older Pinch gets a proper job on Forte Spes helping out and Packet joins the mafia/eventually winds up inheriting an organized crime unit and accidentally taking over a small city (think like JVJ’s Madeleine era except not on purpose)

Hot Shot: (turns into a diy dragrace car) himbo. former Autobot soldier turned drifter (technically looking for one of his war buddies who disappeared but he keeps getting sidetracked) turned preschool teaching assistant on the moon. Frontman of a very small emo band. Meter’s twin brother, Aileron’s best friend, (Sweets isn’t mine, but) Sweets’s self-invited roommate (weird gay thing)

Meter: (used to turn into a regular car, now functions as a speedometer)(also his name is actually Gauge, Aileron just started calling him Metermaid to make fun of him and it stuck) wildly normal little guy for being so fucked up. Got his face and hands and altmode taken by the government for being an anarchist in cop college. Spent the war on the world’s most legally questionable enemies to lovers roadtrip looking for his brother. Hot Shot’s twin, Aileron’s husband.

Aileron: (turns into a massive fucking jet) pointedly neutral freelance journalist. Extremely chill and wildly pessimistic. Can and will befriend anyone with an unfortunate heaping side of terminal Everyone He Really Cares About Keeps Fucking Disappearing Into Thin Air disease. Spent the road-trip causing problems on purpose bc it was funny and also bc he was pretty sure Hot Shot was dead and he didn’t know how to tell Meter so he was stalling. Meter’s husband, Hot Shot’s best friend.

THE ANCIENTS:

Catalyzer (Cat): (left)(turns into a shield except no he doesn’t anymore because he has daddy issues) fucked up old knight. Kind of a dick except with his knight partner and her spouse (the three of them come as a set do not separate <3) and with his little sister (150ft tall). Memory issues wildly exacerbated by the fact that he spent ten million years on the euthanasia planet. There’s a very good au in which he co-parents his nephew w his ex’s ex-wife.

Firefight (FF): (turns into a flamethrower except no he doesn’t bc what if he fucks up his paint) Bitchass little twink. Catalyzer’s shitty ex who lobotomized him. The god of transformation’s special little boy and he’s gonna make it everyone’s problem. After the god war (during which he helped work on a large-scale lobotomy project that made everyone forget the gods) he realized that if there’s not gods to hang around he can’t get special treatment for being god’s special little boy anymore so he fucked off to live in a cave for ten million years and only came out for Cat’s little sister’s funeral bc he figured everyone who would have known him would be dead by now except spoiler alert no they’re not and he immediately gets his ass beat. We don’t have time to get into his wife.

Moonshadow (Shades): (turns into a shuttle)(uses that to cause problems) Catalyzer’s nephew (she/her), troublemaking Weird Little Art Girl TM who’s constantly tagging along on any mission she can get herself into. Unfortunately that includes the mission that lands everyone on the euthanasia planet :(

Equalizer (EQ): (turns into. Maybe a grenade. I haven’t decided yet) Firefight’s ‘apprentice’/weird intense son he didn’t ask for and doesn’t want and also is lowkey terrified of. Functions entirely on looney toons logic. Theoretically xey’re supposed to be helping FF w his lobotomies but he’s scared xey’ll be better than him and take his job so mostly xyr job is knocking people out with the blunt end of xyr Massive Fucking Scythe for their nonconsensual government-assigned brain surgeries and being generally unsettling. Spends FF cave arc waiting outside where he told xem to which xey're not fucked up about but it does make xem very much more fucked up.

Legion: (turns into I don’t know yet probably an anvil or a lever): Little knight guy under the god of wisdom. Dumb as a box of rocks. Trying so fuxking hard all the time and not really getting anywhere with it but that’s okay. Loves his friends so goddamn much. Really fuckin stupid for a guy who kind of functions as the voice of reason in the polycule. Died on the euthanasia planet. :(

Endymion: (turns into a unicorn)(but like the goat kind) goldenboy blacksmith, built to help the main god make guys, conscientious objector to the god war so now he helps out in the armory. Haunted as hell (just kind of vibing with it). Missed the mission that landed everyone on the euthanasia planet and got locked out of the armory :(

DECEPTICON HR OFFICE/EXTENDED CONSTRUCTION UNIT:

Zephyr aka Dreadnought: (used to turn into a flashdrive, tried to do some sketchy ass back alley surgery to turn into something better and fucked it up so now he can’t turn into anything) edgy little goth twink lying wildly about almost everything abt himself. Former spy, current guy who sits in the corner of the office chainsmoking and giving off absolutely rancid vibes. He’s writing a memoir. (it’s bad.) Gets Fixed by the power of Carburetor going “wow, do you have any other slogans from like. Hot topic?” and is really confusingly normal at the postwar HR reunion/Hadron and his boyfriend’s impromptu wedding

Carburetor (CB): (used to turn into a pickup truck, got exploded) readymade soldier who wound up taking over as mostly-untrained medic when the actual medic was killed bc he had spent a lot of time in the medbay recently (due to the getting exploded incident) and kind of osmosed hopefully enough to go off of. Takes no shit but has terminal “I Can Fix Him” Disease (both romantically and medically) but really he’s the one getting fixed—he has a hobby now! 😊 (it’s Zephyr)

Hadron: (serial number ending in 0104)(turns into a crane) starry-eyed little science guy with a secondhand soul. Part of the construction unit and also working part time (illegally) in HR. Defected to the Autobots towards the end of the war and is now doing a goddamn lot of finding out for very little fucking around. Very easy to manipulate. Both has a missing boyfriend and is the missing boyfriend. Main character disease (affectionate but oh dear god at what cost)

Reefer: (0100)(take a wild guess) de-facto leader/union rep of the construction unit by virtue of being built first. Doing his goddamn best but he’s fundamentally just a sillyguy. Also has a secondhand soul but he doesn’t know about it. Would do anything for his little guys. Sneaks Hadron his science magazines. Hazard’s qpp, Hadron’s bestie, other side of Rico’s coin. Died during the great latewar Construction Unit Defection.

Hazard: (0101)(turns into a dump truck) absolutely fuckin massive very nice and kind SIC & emotional support of the construction unit. Also has a secondhand soul but it’s never really relevant. Guy who’s usually the one to talk to outsiders for the gang. Has never held a gun but almost got sent to the front lines of the war bc they’re Fucking Huge and hella shit was pulled to Stop That Happening (without them even knowing in the first place). Reefer’s qpp, Dyker (0102) isn’t mine and there’s a lot of lore but Dyker is their best friend (I think?). Dead. (Meter pushed them off one of the spires of Decepticon HQ bc they asked if he was okay and were a little too concerned)

Ricochet (Rico): (0103)(turns into a backhoe) oh she’s so fucked up. She’s so fucked up. Also has a secondhand soul and she’s not really aware of that but she’s not normal about it either. Hadron’s older sister figure (derogatory), other side of Reefer’s coin (Threefer), imprinted hard on Dyker and took the Shit That Got Pulled really REALLY badly. Blames Hadron for Reefer’s death to avoid blaming herself. Was briefly a neutral medic but went back to the Decepticons real quick and took the ending of the war also incredibly badly. (And by incredibly badly I mean she got a group to try and restart the war and recruited a bunch of guys to try and replace her family and it’s Not Working)

Chainlink: (turns into a tank)(attempt at replacing Hazard) Rico’s Fucking Massive SIC/de-facto bodyguard who’s really not jazzed about following someone else’s orders. Does it anyway out of… respect that she got there first (or something.) but makes it very very clear that Ze Would Kill Her (in a weird gay way) If Ze Got the Chance. (Ze is in fact given the chance and Doesn’t Take It. Neither of them are really sure how to cope with that). Died one time during the war but got better and is kind of an asshole about that. Mean sense of humor.

Sprocket: (turns into a handheld cannon)(Hadron but Rico likes him) literally just a little guy. Built on Earth approximately three days before the war ended and doesn’t actually know what that means for anything. Definitely getting a little bit gaslighted here. Finds out abt that and is so betrayed/hurt/doesn’t know what else to do that he turns them all in and fucks off to actually see the universe and the planet outside the war and also go to robot law school. Does tech/support/recon for the squad’s endeavors and missions from a secret third location

Roughhouse: (turns into a lifted ass Ford F150)(Reefer 2 smarter boogaloo) Sprocket’s bestie and everyone’s emotional support himbo and by emotional support himbo I mean this guy is treating this revolution like a kindergarten teacher. Guy who 100% tried to set up a sticker system to try and get Rico and Chainlink to be normal. He’s not even that invested in it he just thinks it’s funny to get Rico overly invested in things she’s Going to lose. Yes she’s his boss technically yes she forgets that sometimes (younger sister instinct). The fanciest and only prewar member of the gang. Former bouncer, early Decepticon recruit, current pacifist and backup guy.

THE SECRET OTHER OPTION:

Rudder: of Rudder and Oar fame. They don’t give a shit they’re just out there fishing. A lot of the time they wind up picking up body parts/people but that’s not what they’re fishing for so they just toss them in the back to sell to the mafia. Together they turn into a bigger boat.

[dee-in-the-box]

welp.

thought about transfem bigender Peter again.

so y'know what? screw it, let me give my headcanon for this:

so like. as chaotic of a child Dee was, she did still do some of the more "stereotypical" little girl things, like having tea parties with her toys and occasionally dragging her brothers into it. Jack honestly goes along with it because Dee uses them as an excuse to complain/gossip about kids she goes to Daycare with, and Jack wants the Preschooler Drama. Peter just does it as an excuse to spend more time with Dee.

Dee would occasionally paint everyone's nails, because fuck it, why not? Jack would typically get black and orange, because Those Are Cool Colors. Peter would just let Dee choose, because, well, why would it matter? it's not like he particularly cares, he's just doing this to make her happy, after all.

well...sometimes he'd forget to wash it off. and, well, he realized that it looked pretty good on him.

he refuses to really acknowledge any of this for years, up until like. two years before he died. as another headcanon of mine, Jack and Peter still kept in touch after 1973 up until Peter's death. Peter just kinda called Jack (a trans man) one evening going "Hey, My Gender Feels Weird, Any Tips?"

"Like...Do You Feel Like A Woman, Or-?"

"Not Exactly, Like...Kinda? Not Really?? It's Weird."

"Hm. Ask Caroline For Help With Things, Because I'm A Bit Busy With Shit Man. Anyway, Congrats, Let Me Know How It Goes."

he grows his hair out a bit, starts using he/she, y'know. Just Vibing. then she dies. dangit.

i feel like, once he gets back home with Caroline, she'd get to explore things more.

anyway. yeah.

if i had a nickel for every time i just got a random thought and it ended up turning into a legitimate headcanon of mine, i'd probably be rich by now-

[yloiseconeillants]

15 Questions!~

1. Are you named after anyone?

Yes! My mother named both me and my sister after Very Popular Characters on her Very Popular Late 1980s Daytime Soap Opera. Then she named my brother after MacGyver.

2. When was the last time you cried?

bachelor party mushroom trip bath time last weekend (it was a joyous cry)

3. Do you have kids?

No, and no interest personally. I have two nieces and a nephew. My partner and I are considering fostering older kids/teens when we're in our 40s/50s but that remains to be seen.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Not often, and when I do it's almost exclusively purposely meant to fall Very Flat (I have been told I have some sort of sense of humor by my friends but none of us can figure it out).

5. What sports do you play/have you played?

My grandfather was convinced that since I was tall for a preschooler that I would end up as a basketball player and tried to encourage me and my sister to take up basketball as children (taking us to college games, playing with us at the local park, etc) but I ended up more of a 'scrambling through creeks before spending hours being weird at the library' kind of kid. In high school, I did enjoy dance, badminton, and field hockey when forced to do so through p.e. classes, but I'm. not sports.

6. What’s the first thing you notice about other people?

Oh yikes, it depends on the circumstances? If I'm meeting someone new at a familiar place among familiar people, usually how they interact with people that I know? What their body language conveys about a relationship or acquaintanceship, I guess. If it's an entirely new person in a neutral environment, like at work, probably still body language, but I'd be checking more for like, how nervous they are to determine what kind of tone to take with them (I worked in a government office for Official Technical Stuff and there's a lot of people who are Very Unsure about what they ~should be doing).

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

Oh, scary movies. Happy endings are great but I tend to prefer media that just coincidentally doesn't have them? (so when I *am* enjoying something that *does* have a happy ending, it's so much sweeter). However, I love being spooked and I am *very* easily spooked so like, you can find me watching horror movies from a distance in my kitchen with all the lights on, and the sound turned off during the really scary bits and I'll be like, making food to combat the terrors - having a fucking fantastic time actually.

8. Any special talents?

Good memory for things I have written down.

9. Where were you born?

California, baby!

10. What are your hobbies?

playing barbies and falling into research holes

11. Do you have any pets?

I have two cats :) They are Very Neurotic.

12. How tall are you?

13. Fave subject in school?

I mean, I really enjoyed majoring in community development (focus on urban planning, but the public engagement bits of that were really fun), but if we're talking like, high school, definitely drama. Like, yes, it was mostly just my friends and I fucking around for an hour during school and however many hours after school, but I genuinely enjoyed the academic bits of it when my teacher still pretended to give at least somewhat of a fuck before she checked out entirely in my last two years in it. Language and literature classes were usually pretty fun, especially in community college (shout out to my Russian lit course for being Wild and to that time that I took a required English class that was taught by a teacher whose background was poetry). OH AND THIS INSTITUTIONAL ECON CLASS I TOOK-

14. Dream job?

Don't believe in 'dream' jobs but in a situation where I was still forced to rely on working to survive but I could do whatever I wanted, I'd love to like just wear a bright vest and hang out on public transportation and give people information on transit routes and destinations. Please let me help the tourists. They need help.

15. Eye colour?

that fucky 'grey' color which means I can't fucking see shit when it's bright out because i'm squinting too much

Tagged by @mirrim-the-moonfaerie and @sundered-souls

Tagging: whoever wants a tag!!

[iron-bullogna]

I'm going to vent a bit about it here then. I'm a bit flustered so hopefully it isn't all over the place. Over my life I've experienced a lot of cruelty, primarily at the hands of white cis women and men. I grew up in a town of 1,000 people and my graduating class was 32. I went to the same school my entire life. The area was predominantly white and I mean that in a "I can count on my fingers and toes the amount of POC I encountered in my life before 18" way. I was also born AFAB. It was very clear from a young age I wasn't "normal". I have preschool paperwork highlighting my very obvious autistic traits (playing alone, organization, and at one point I could see from one quarterly report to the other how I taught myself to mask a behavior the aids noted as an issue, etc). My first "best friend" was a boy from the Ukraine who no one wanted to befriend because everyone assumed his English wasn't good. I can't even tell you how his English was because I don't remember that. I just remember he didn't care that I was a little weird and liked "boy" stuff and wore boys clothes when I could cause he liked "girl" stuff.

The boy and girl stuff mentioned here are literally as simple as Pokemon and Britney Spears. We were bullied by our peers, family, and parents for just being children. The only female friend I had growing up that I chose myself was bullied for being indigenous, looking masculine, (I believe Shoshone/Cherokee but I was 9 and I can't recall now apologies) and liking "boy" stuff. She moved only a few years later. I did not have another female friend until my senior year in high school and big shocker that a few years ago she was diagnosed with autism alongside her son. I knew from age 12-14 roughly that I was trans. I thought I was a transman back then. This was pre-internet btw folks. I had NO IDEA wtf a trans person was or that it was even a real thing. I just felt like I wasn't a girl and I couldn't possibly be a girl, all because of how those around me treated me. I'm not saying every transman is just a traumatized cis woman, but I know for a fact for me and my personal situation, being told I looked like a boy, all the stuff I liked was for boys, just literally everything about me = well that is what boys do, not girls. I genuinely think in my case, that it impacted me psychologically in a way so deep it gave me a lot of mental health issues surrounding gender. I would go through phases of hyper performing femininity and hypersexuality to try and fit in. I developed a huge complex around my self worth and being desirable that still persists to this day. This is the part Twitter was angry about and wouldn't let anyone interact with. I'm now 34 and it's manifested in a new way since quarantine since I didn't have interaction with people outside of close friends for that entire time. I find myself with an intense fear of pretty cis women, particularly white women. It's a genuine uncontrollable fear response where my entire body starts trembling because I can't stand the thought of being perceived by them. I feel so lacking. I don't even fucking identify as a woman anymore either but I can't even describe the dread I feel about being near them. It isn't even their fault either. They can be the nicest in the world to me but societal pressure and the treatment of women, cis and trans alike, has caused me so much harm I'm actually actively searching for a new therapist to help with this issue. TERFS out here literally causing the issues they say are "plaguing women from being women". Like HUH? You're literally reinforcing stereotypes babes!!! The same stereotypes you say are misogynistic! You're the problem!!! I actually have surgery on Monday and I told my husband I'm more afraid at being perceived by the beautiful women in the clinic (it has an attached MedSpa, trust me, they're all flawless goddesses in there) than I am being awake for the actual surgery. I don't doubt I would still come out as trans (rn I identify vaguely as non-binary/transmasc) because I just don't really vibe with the concept of gender as a whole. I would have just probably figured out that those feelings weren't necessarily me wanting to be or actually being a man a lot sooner. My heart just hurts for Imane Khelif because I can't imagine if she legit is just a normal ass cis woman with higher testosterone how it must feel right now to be attacked like that. And if she is intersex, how much she probably faced a lot of similar treatment that I did growing up. At this point I'm just rambling, but it has all made me very very sad and just brought up a lot of trauma from my own life.

[ambreiiigns]

Ok then now tell me about these sk8 big and little boyfriends? I'm interested by the distinction of big and little, you know? :P

ok after Thee category 5 doubleblack moment and watching tristamp w my brother i'll answer this sk8 ask. then i'll go look at deathnote images saved to my phone to complete the collection of anime i care about

so you will never believe me but sk8. is about. a bunch. of skater boys. we have langa who moves to japan from canada after his dad dies bc his mom's japanese. him and his dad used to do snowboarding together but langa got lowkey depressed after his death and doesn't feel much passion for snowboarding anymore. plus he lives in beachy town now so it'd be impossible anyway

he meets reki there tho. and Oh reki is just like. the sun. they're in class together but didn't really talk (langa doesn't talk much) but they bump into each other while reki's out skating and he gets langa to try it and it just. goes downhill from there

reki takes him to S !!! which is this like super secret skaterz place that opens at night on some mountain where they have races and place bets and stuff. long story short langa finds that Spark he's missed ever since his dad died in reki and skateboarding - as in, yeah sure skating's fun but it's reki that makes his heart beat fast and not the adrenaline or whatever. it's not Skating itself that makes him happy but it's skating With Reki. they're so fucking SWEET. they have a bit of a fight halfway thru the series bc reki has some inferiority complex and langa almost loses the Spark again. it's really sweet. at some point he vaguely talks to his mom abt this fight and she assumes it's about a girl he likes so she asks him. "you LIKE this person don't you" and langa BLUSHES HE'S SO CUTE and says yeah :// so she hypes him up to go talk things out and says. good lird. "show her she's a lucky girl!!" and langa. i am quoting word for word. answers. "what girl." gay people real

and those ^ are the little boyfriends. now the BIG boyfriends ugh !! unsufferable. you got kojiro aka joe and kaoru aka cherry and we meet them at s. in fact they FOUNDED s when they were teens along w adam who's the bad guy in this show and i want him dead. joe is. built like a brickhouse and mildly italian ?? he runs a restaurant during the day and the Gang meets up there a lot he's the sweetest in the world and worries and helps the kids anytime he can i adore him. cherry's gnc af (you're insane) he's pretty as fuck and had a Punk Phase as a kid where he had a couple of piercings and emo bangs and NO ONE has ever looked better EVER but he's Mean but still Cares. when they met adam back in the day him & cherry had a lil somethin somethin going on but he ended up dumping them Both for being boring bc he's insane. i don't wanna talk abt him. so that leaves cherry & joe alone again - which is cool. they've been together since preschool they're the type to bicker and talk shit 24/7 while still always being glued to each other. they're so Horny but they won't fuck. everyone at s wonts them carnally. the kids (by this i mean reki & langa but mostly miya who's like a little shit pro skater they picked up along the way) (shoutout to the icp clown rockstar legend shadow who's the 6th and final member of The Gang) call them mom and dad Frequently and they call the gang "The Kids" an incriminating amount of times (they accidentally adopted two 16yos one 14yo and one 24yo. at age 26)

realizing i don't Know how to explain joe & cherry you kinda just have to witness them. there's this bit where cherry's explaining to The Kids how adam does one of his moves so he skates right up to joe and says "Hello..." in a. weird fucking tone and joe hisses back "You're Too Close!!!" threatheningly like he's gonna fuckin Jump him. there's this other bit during THEE beach episode where joe's flirting w some ladies (he's a manwhore) and miya grabs him pretends that he's his dad and tells him that Mommy's mad !! pointing at cherry who's like napping sexily. and joe actually looks at him and like fuckin whimpers and blushes like a virgin and all he can say for himself is THAT IS NOT YOUR MOM !!!! hello. what was that. also there's the bit where adam fuckin slams his board across cherry's face (?!?!?!?) and joe picks him up like a princess (which he calls him sometimes. princess and pinky and the likes) and gets him to the hospital and THEN cherry sneaks out of the hospital to go to joe's restaurant and falls asleep there and joe looks at him sooo tenderly and says something like "at least we aren't alone right kaoru?" and it's Sweet bc cherry has troubles sleeping but he feels safe enough to sleep around joe..... don't u wanna scream

here look at them. the kids the parents the squad

[sonic-spirit]

It feels weird to have a headcannon about yourself? But I have a headcannon about myself? Headcannon feels like a wrong way to phrase it, but also I don’t have a better way to put it.

So, some Mobians are born with powers (I usually go with 20% of Mobians and about 10% of humans, though there could be sampling bias (and also these percentages are pulled directly out of my anus)). And naturally there’s a need to make sure all these super powered kids are able to not hurt themselves or anyone else with these powers, so powered kits go to a special preschool to help them with those particular struggles.

And then…the things that happen in It Doesn’t Matter happen. (Oh yeah! I put the scripts so far up on my AO3 last week, so you can actually see some of what I’m talking about instead of there being just a void where context should be!) And suddenly people end up transforming into Mobians, and developing powers, and the perception filter will do some of the heavy lifting, buuut, it won’t do all of it. So there ends up being a hole in support where powered kids are being born and there aren’t any structures in place that can help them get their powers under them.

And I think that if shit could CALM THE FUCK DOWN FOR FIVE FUCKIN’ SECONDS I’d be super down and like, actually pretty good at helping kits out with that. Sonic’s Xavier School, bet better.

Yeah, shit gets weird because this is my parallel life and…it’s just so much to just talk about.

Anyway, over here I’ve been teaching mostly kids but also some adults and doing pretty damn rad at it, so I’m starting to think this “headcannon” holds more water than I originally thought when it first occurred to me.

[phanfinger]

I'm in a multiple subject credential program currently.

So I get to student teach. This is not my first rodeo. I've student taught two times before.

First time was 9 years ago. I was a child development major at the community college that I went to. I did the practicum class, for preschool. Oh my god, I had the worst experience ever. The mentor teacher or whatever the fuck she was called was so incredibly bad at giving my constructive criticism. I thought that I was bad because she never had something nice to say me ever. I seriously remember that the only positive thing she ever said to me was that I noticed things in children that she did not notice. I was in the preschool classroom once a week for four hours. I spent the entire time on edge because of her. But I did enjoy being around the children. When I was getting my end of the year review from her from my lecture teacher, I really thought that I was going to fail. My lecture teacher misplaced my review from her so she called her right then to review me. To my disbelief, the mentor teacher gave me a glowing review. I was incredibly shocked. Fuck that bitch honestly. I almost quit the whole major all together.

But I continued on. I got into a California State University. Majored in Early Childhood Studies. I still enjoyed learning about children. I enjoyed my lecture teachers. It had its own student teaching program. But uh oh! Covid happened! So student teaching had to be online. It fucking sucked so bad. Not because the children I had to observe were annoying or anything but mostly because of the state of the world. My teachers assigned us videos to watch and create curriculum that way. It was not ideal for sure. I got my degree in early childhood studies in spring of 2021. I was so done. I was finished. I was burnt out so badly. Got a shitty preschool job. I quit after three days.

But then I got a good preschool job. I stayed there for three years. There was a moment in my first year where my co teacher's husband had open heart surgery and so she was out for 2 weeks. I was able to run that classroom. I was so happy. I felt like that I proved that mentor teacher bitch wrong. I could do this. I can be a teacher. I just finished there about two weeks ago. It feels weird but I needed to move on.

Why? Well, TK (Transitional Kindergarten, which takes kids as early as 4 years old) is taking enrollment away from preschool. Unless I wanted to work with children who were barely 3 years old and not potty trained, I am shit out of luck. Also, preschool doesn't pay shit. I fully believe in preschool though. If you have the means to, send your child to several years of preschool. Your child needs the social skills, believe me. Your child knowing their ABCs and their numbers up to 20 doesn't mean shit if they're hitting their friends, taking things without permission, or being unable to listen to people in general.

Anyway, I've been assigned 3rd grade. Quite different than preschool. I think it's pretty funny because I actually repeated the third grade. My family was moving across the city we lived in and my science skills were not up to my science teacher mom's standards. So moved schools but repeated third grade. I remember my second year of third grade being much easier and reading a lot. My teacher was on the verge of retirement so she didn't care what I did when I finished my work. I am very excited to relearn the material again 21 years later!

I've met up with my cooperating teacher twice now. She seems fine as a person.

However, her entire classroom and the way she has organized her classroom is entirely Harry Potter themed and based. Don't get me wrong, it's pretty impressive but at the same time so incredibly cringe. I mean, she's had years to change it and she hasn't. And she's basically admitted to me that she has spent so much time, effort, and money making her classroom look and operate like this. She asked me if I was a fan. I said that I had read all the books and seen all the movies based on the books. She interrupted me and said that I was way ahead of her previous student teachers. I told her that I was 30 that I grew up with it but I'm not a fan of it anymore.

She's vaguely aware of J.K's assholery but not really. I told her what J.K. just recently did and her response was literally, "Well, that is too bad."

She's kind of an ally. I guess. A very basic one. I referred to my non binary twin as "they" and she stopped me and told me to say that it again as she wants to get pronouns right. Her 20 year old majoring in art daughter always yells at her about getting pronouns right for her friends. I took the opportunity to tell her that I was agender. She was as supportive as she could muster I guess. But I told her that in the classroom that I was a woman. She said that was best because the elementary school that I've been assigned to hosts military families and they can be a bit conservative. It makes sense because there are two local bases.

Anyway, first day is Wednesday. I'm hoping to muster enough energy to write about my experiences every day but we'll see.

[skulkingwriter]

A couple of months ago, while I was sitting in hospital with gallstones and nothing much else to do, I watched Heathers The Musical, which is available on Prime, at least in the UK.

And I came out of it with a really sour taste in my mouth, and it wasn’t exactly the fault of the show itself - not exactly.

Spoilers and both praise and criticism under the readmore…

I was worried, going in, that it would be softened somehow from the film. That there would be… idk, not less murder because then it’s not even Heathers any more, but I guess from the way the marketing leans on the iconic short skirts and croquet mallets and the 90s glam of the Heathers themselves, I think I worried they might be neither awful nor pathetic enough. But no! Three more awful and pathetic human beings you rarely see on stage in a teen-pleasing musical. The boy, also? Horrid. Love it. Veronica doesn’t get off easy either. No one does. Everyone here is terrible. As it should be!

Which brings me to Martha. Hands up who’s surprised. Nobody? Good.

I was hoping for more depth for Martha. It would have been an actual improvement on the film, where as far as I remember she’s just sort of there as a way to prove Veronica has become a better person at the end. And… I guess? She gets a whole song?

But it’s literally all about her preschool boyfriend who is a rapist now. And look, I can talk myself around, if I try. I guess if she had seemed less pathetic and deluded than the rest of the characters that might have not been fair or felt like it fit. And sure the dickhead preschool boyfriend is human, and dead, and there’s no harm in waxing lyrical about the lost innocence of their youth, before everyone including him turned on Martha for being fat and uncool.

But it just… didn’t feel like it was about Martha, not like Heather 3’s surprisingly moving solo about the boat. I wanted a song about Martha. Veronica is so fucked up by the high school politics that she (accidentally) murders three people, and she is conventionally attractive enough to pass for a Heather. Martha is a real victim in a way that Veronica can only dream about, she attempts suicide about it, and all she has to say for herself is a fantasy about a boy.

I know it’s not unrealistic for that to be what she’s obsessing over. I was just hoping for more. A little update. A tiny bit of empathy.

But none of that is actually the thing that made me feel sick. That was when she came out in the wheelchair and brace at the end and

the audience laughed.

I’m still not sure if the staging set them up for it. Kind of, I guess. The narrative didn’t. She was a pathetic character, the implied conscience of the lead, and the last thing she had done on stage was attempt suicide.

She came on stage in her wheelchair and the audience for this musical laughed at her.

And I flashed back to the opening credits pre-roll bit where we’d seen a succession of teen girls queuing to get in and buying hot bully merch, and I felt ill. Can I say for sure there were no fat or visibly disabled teens in that video? No, I’d have to go back and look. I would be pretty surprised though. If there were any unconventional looking girls in that audience, I don’t think they got to be on telly about it. And I had been a little bit apprehensive about that all along, and I’d forgotten about it because the musical was pretty good, and guess what? I was right.

And honestly that’s why I can’t recommend this to people, even though the music is fun and the story is as fucked up as the original in most of the right ways. Right at the end, the audience who’s been enjoying this teenage bully-killing revenge fantasy turns around and straight up bullies the only fat or disabled character and it is a gut punch to experience.

Veronica is the audience surrogate, living out these intensely teen fantasies one by one - adoption by popular set, hot weird boyfriend, violent revenge, vindication and redemption. And ever since I saw the film 20-odd years ago I’ve assumed that, sure, some Veronicas needed that as teens too, and obviously you’d never cast a Martha in the lead role, but as a Martha, this is secretly a story for me.

Except it’s not. Apparently.

Anyway think the musical is pretty good but the audience ruined it for me and I wasn’t even there.