#never happened to me before this last year (afaik anyway)

[byanyan]

never ceases to baffle and confuse me when i discover i'm blocked by someone i've never interacted with but share several mutuals with who we both interact with regularly

[gece-misin-nesin]

hi i just wanted to ask if you had any jason-centric fanfic recs that actually focus on him and not make it about another character (saying this because the bruce and tim stans do this so often for some reason)

because i don’t know, its odd, so much fanfic is dedicated to how jason has to grovel to get the approval of the batfam or batman and i don’t want that because like in my opinion jason was never wrong about anything actually. unfortunately it seems most fans disagree and then write not so enjoyable fanfic about it :/

looking at the tim drake stans in particular like thats the most boring robin dont drag jason into this 😭

Hi! First of all thank you so much for sending an ask! Basically these will be fics that focus primarily on Jason and do NOT have him be in the wrong (i have those too, bc they can be well written and they are unfortunately impossible to avoid). Theyre not in any particular order, I'm just going thru all my bookmarks haha!! This is long bc my bookmarks containing jasons character tag is 28 pages on ao3. i am very normal about him. anyway! here they are:

The Beating Heart is a 4-shot featuring Ghostmakes/Jason, so if thats not your cup of tea, ignore it. Bruce is very much an asshole in this so if you're feeling hateful towards him (which is based) this will scratch that itch

The Bowery Branch is a one-shot from the pov of a librarian in the bowery. It's a bunch of snapshots focusing on how the librarians there view and interact w jason throughout his life!

The Lost Titans is soo good. Jason and some other people start having dreams about an alternate timeline where they were in a titans team together. Then some shit starts to go down and they have to fix it. has minimum bat appearances iirc. great mystery too!!

hit me as hard as you can is another good one. i think bruce and jason start over at the end but it was such a journey?? the whole thing is very good. and i remember the writing being very poignant

Thank you, Next! is a one-shot focusing on Jason and the men he's loved over the years. Introspective and character study-esque. very good

so, you've killed the joker is, as the name implies, a oneshot abt jason killing the joker. he does NOT feel guilty about doing it, which is for some reason a common trope in fics.

Father-Hood is about Jason raising an infant before he has the chance to start his revenge plan. He also gets together with Eddie Bloomberg <3

Granted the Serenity is about Countdown w donna jason and kyle happening w an al caste jason i think. it has next to 0 bruce iirc.

Things We've Lost, and Things We've Gained takes place in the young justice cartoon verse. if u dont know about it the short story is: the first child superhero team was not teen titans and roy harper was kidnapped and replaced w a clone and when the og roy is found he is rlly angry lol. Jayroy.

Yellow, Red, and Green is an au where jason becomes a green lantern while digging out of his grave. has a sequel in the works afaik but still good as a standalone.

Get Used to Dying is, in my objectively correct opinion, THE Jason Todd fic. I have recommended it before, and it's still a masterpiece. It tells Jason's life in the format of a play, absolutely brilliant.

Sacrosanct is about jason & bruce's relationship, and i think just from bruce's pov, but I have to rec it on the ground of it just being *chefs kiss* also there is no "bruce is right and do you not know how he mourned you jason!! care more about bruces reaction to your death than your own plase :/" bs

folly of youth, jason introspection/character study iirc. remember it being really good. also the last scene has great imagery.

in a new york minute, everything can change WILL make you cry no matter how much you've read it. it's about the last 60 seconds of Jason's (first) life. heartbreaking.

April 27th / I was only a child is a jason visits his grave one-shot. no bruce.

I think I could have included more but my bookmarks are uh. LONG. If I have other recs I will rb this post!!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for indirectly getting someone kicked out of a writing group?

This happened a couple years ago and all involved were in their early 20s afaik. I am submitting this because the situation still bothers me.

This writing group met weekly and occasionally had additional social events. Teal did most of the organizing for this group. They valued the group a lot and said it was the best part of their time in college. Ash was the only cis guy in the group and was heavily involved in a large club at school. I was friends with a few people in this club.

I never felt as close to the writing group as its other members. I think this is because I joined last and stopped attending meetings regularly once Covid started. During meetings we usually talk about what’s going on in our lives. Ash had been telling us about a very stressful situation he was going through, which was compromising his friendships and employment. At around the same time I found out through one of my friends in Ash’s club that he had been accused of sexual harassment, assault and intimidation by other club members. As a result he was banned from the club and its events. Putting two and two together I reached out to Teal and we talked about it. I think at the time I had said that I didn’t want to go to meetings if Ash was also attending. Later Teal reached out to Ash, who told them that the allegations were false and that the accusers had repeatedly called Ash’s girlfriend and said threatening things to her (I don’t recall exactly what was said). Teal came out of this conversation feeling that Ash was innocent. Teal then relayed this to me and offered to connect me with Ash so I could hear his side of the story. I declined and told Teal that I didn’t feel comfortable attending meetings with Ash unless Ash was found to be innocent by a third party (Ash was pursuing legal action at the time). Teal said they would discuss the situation with each member of the group individually, but that they would ask Ash not to come to meetings until the resolution of his legal action. I told Teal that if everyone but me was ok with Ash being in the group then I would be ok with leaving the group. I felt like the group meant the least to me and that the group as a whole would miss/value Ash more. Teal did not take me up on this.

Fast forward to the present day. Ash has not come back to meetings but is still in the group chat I think. I have no idea what happened with the accusations. I still attend irregularly but I feel better about my place in the group and closer to the members than before. But I still wonder what I could have done differently. Should I have been more insistent and left the group anyway? Should I have talked to other members? Should I have talked to Ash? Did my inaction in these areas make me the AH?

Anyway thanks for reading sorry this got so long

[lightandfellowship]

Do you have any headcanons for Xehanort and Strelitzia? I enjoyed your comic about them.

Aw, thank you, glad you liked it. As for headcanons...let's see...

While I don't know exactly how Xehanort in Quadratum would work, I do think that, if it does happen, it'll have something to do with the "nature taboo" stuff from KH3 Re:Mind and Xehanort's "joke" in KHDR about wanting a 14th lifetime. I imagine the Xehanort in Quadratum is some sort of backup plan or maybe the Xehanort that was meant to continue on in the new world that Xehanort would create with Kingdom Hearts.

That being said, I think it would be fun/interesting if this Xehanort wasn't really a villain at all. Either has memory loss or is simply a Xehanort from post-KHDR but before the villain turn thanks to MoM. So he's just been living a relatively normal life in Quadratum and would be on the side of the good guys (Sora + Strel) this time.

But anyway. I think at first Xehanort and Strel would have no idea that they're connected to each other through a common "friend": Player. Like maybe initially they're drawn to each other subconsciously because they can recognize that they're connected somehow (though I don't think Xehanort would recognize her by appearance because afaik Player never saw Strel in KHUX), but their friendship definitely lasts for a good while before they realize that they've been talking to each other about the same person this entire time.

Like Strel will talk about this person she really liked and desperately wanted to meet who she never got the chance to really know, Xehanort will eventually open up about his mentor/guardian who raised him on Destiny Islands, and one day it just clicks for them that...wait...why does this person they're talking about sound so familiar....

At which point Strel is like "Oh my god. No way. You have to tell me more about them. What were their favorite foods? Hobbies? Tell me everything!" And it's through Xehanort that Strel finally gets to "know" Player better, because, well, Xehanort knew them for like 15 whole years or whatever. In fact they were the only person Xehanort ever knew for those years; it's possible that Xehanort knows Player better than anybody else in the world. (I can imagine Strel feeling a little bitter/jealous about this...)

As for their friendship outside of Player...if Eraqus isn't in Quadratum with Xehanort, I imagine Strel almost being like a replacement Eraqus, as horrible/mean as that sounds lol. Like not literally replacing him as Xehanort's friend, but much like Eraqus she's the sun to Xehanort's moon. The gold to Xehanort's silver. The white clothes to Xehanort's black clothes. She fills a similiar niche. Maybe Xehanort even thinks to himself that she reminds him of Eraqus...and maybe that makes their friendship a little bittersweet because now Xehanort misses Eraqus even more.

I imagine people like Sora being kinda confused at first by Xehanort and Strel's friendship. Strel can be sunny and sweet and a little bit of a scaredy cat, Xehanort can be a little gloomy and blunt and quite confident in himself (though they both have the "socially and/or emotionally reserved" thing going for them.) After a while though Sora realizes that Strel and Xehanort's friendship reminds him of his own friendship with Riku, and then it starts to make more sense to him. And in any case, if this means that Xehanort is making friends and not causing trouble, then Sora's fine with it.

Now, I wonder if a recompleted Lauriam looking for his sister would be okay with their friendship, though, given that Marluxia has worked with a Xehanort twice at this point and even tried to betray one of them once. Lauriam would realize that Xehanort is dangerous and can't be trusted and would probably try to screw things up for Strel and Xehanort despite their friendship actually being genuine with no ulterior motives (can't really blame Lauriam, though.) But maybe Strel would put her foot down and try to convince Lauriam that Xehanort is perfectly harmless.

Strel: And anyway, he's my friend—what, you don't want me to finally have friends?? Huh??

Lauriam: Ugh. Fine! But the second he does anything fishy I'm slicing his head off with my scythe.

Strel: Okay. <3

Xehanort: WHAT DO YOU MEAN "OKAY. <3"???

[akstzs]

maybe I judged the hidden world too harshly <- finished the umbrella academy season 4

rant under the cut so spoilers

HOW TF DO YOU TAKE THE CHARACTER WHO IN THE PREVIOUS SEASONS WAS DEFINED BY HIS LOVE FOR HIS FAMILY AND CHARACTER ASSASSINATE HIM BY SHOEHORNING HIM INTO A ROMANCE WITH HIS BROTHERS WIFE WHO HAVE THREE KIDS TOGETHER

ALSO AFAIK THIS IS THE FIRST FRICKING SEASON WHEN WHILE FILMING FIVES ACTOR WAS OVER 18, AND BEFORE IT WAS LIKE “oh yay he can finally shoot a gun on screen” BUT NOW ITS LIKE “OH GOD WHY DID THEY MAKE HIM KISS A CHARACTER WHOS ACTRESS IS FIFTEEN YEARS OLDER THAN HIS ACTOR”

AND THEN THE REST OF THE SEASON HIS MAIN FOCUS IS HER NOT THE REST OF THE FAMILY

anyway apocalypse five should’ve shot season 4 five

AND WHERE TF WAS SLOANE. EVEN IF HER ACTRESS DIDNT WANT TO COME BACK SURELY THEY COULD WRITE HER OUT BETTER THAN JUST NOT EXPLAINING IT AT ALL. LUTHER GOES “I wish me and Sloane had a family and house and whatever” WHAT HAPPENED TO HER THEN. SHE WAS ALSO APART OF THE MARIGOLD EXTRACTION CIRCLE.

AND RAY WALKED OUT??? SEASON 2 RAYMOND CHESTNUT WOULD NEVER. LITERALLY JUST SAY HE DIED DURING THE TIME SKIP OR SOMETHING ITS BETTER THAN COMPLETELY RUINING HIM WITH JUST ONE LINE

POOR FRICKING KLAUS MAN I JUST THOUGHT THE BIKER GUY WAS GONNA SELL HIS ORGANS OR SOMETHING NOT BASICALLY MAKING HIM A PROSTITUTE

OH BOY BEN. FOR A SEASON FOCUSING ON HIM HE SURE IS MORE OF A PLOT DEVICE THAN A CHARACTER. I GET THAT HE DOESNT LIKE THE UMBRELLAS ALL TOO MUCH BUT AT TIMES HIS INSISTENCE TO STAY WITH JENNIFER FELT EXCESSIVE. SHOULDNT HE ALSO NOT WANT TO LOSE HER LIKE HE LOST THE SPARROWS SO HE WOULD FINALLY OPEN UP AND ACCEPT HELP WHEN SHE WASNT DOING WELL. I GET THAT HIS BEHAVIOR IS EXPLAINED BY THE CLEANSE TAKING OVER HIM OR WHATEVER BUT IT JUST FELT LIKE AN EXCUSE TO MAKE THE CLEANSE HAPPEN AND DOESNT FEEL LIKE BEN HAS ANY AGENCY BY THE END. AND BY THE LAST EPISODE HE AND JENNIFER JUST TURN INTO A FRICKING BLOB MONSTER SO HE DOESNT EVEN GET ANYTHING IN LIKE THE LAST 30 MINS

The ending is honestly about how I expected a series where every season the hargreeves’ actions bring about the apocalypse but it was so much worse because of all this shit that happened before it

in my head the season ended right before Ben spiked their drinks with the marigold and the siblings keep going with their newly built lives

[dumplingsjinson]

Okay so a LOT happened today. This is going to be a mess, so yeah, just a heads up!

TL;DR at the very bottom, like always.

One thing before I start: Even after all of this has happened, there’s a part of me that wonders if he likes me or not but it’s definitely solidified the fact that I like him 😂

On with it!

So I met up with him at the train station, and we went to one of the art galleries located 10 minutes away from the station. Nothing much really happened here. We hugged as a way of greeting and I held back on kissing him because I didn't want to startle him, and I also wasn't sure if he'd be okay with it. I did link arms with him and shit during the start of it but eventually let go.

Anyway, we were in the city for probably an hour before we hopped on the train (I was leaning on him and everything during the ride because I was tired lol), then changed to the metro, then got to his car so he could drive us back to his suburb.

We walked around the shopping centre for like, an hour. While we were on the escalators, we would like... Lean against each other and shit; doing shit couples do. At one point, he was placing his chin on my shoulder and had his hand on my waist and I was like OMGREONGKNREG.

(Funny thing about this: his mother was also at the shopping centre, because he saw her car parked near his, and he called her about it. All I heard was him repeating my name over and over again after she asked him who he was with. He didn't address me as a friend to her, just like how he didn't address me as a friend to his other family members the last time I went to his house so like... Oop. Good sign, perhaps? I never saw her at the shopping centre, but when we got to his home, she was just pulling out of the driveway to go to a party. So I met her for like... Five seconds lmfao.)

Anyway, the house was empty. Everyone's gone. I was in his living room lounging around for a bit, and then like... 10-15 minutes of me being there, he invited me up to his room and this is where things get... Interesting.

Things after this are going to be a bit out of order lol, I'm writing them as they come to me.

We were lying on his bed and he was all snuggled against me (keep in mind, his bed is a single bed so it's quite a tight fit for two people, and it means we kinda need to be pressed up against each other so the person who's on the outer side doesn't fall off the bed lmfao). He was telling me stories about his life, I was telling him stories about my life, he told me about his exes (he's been in two relos before: first one was for 2 years, second one was for 3 years. Been like... Two years since he's been in a relo since lol, or least a serious/long term one afaik). He ended up telling me about his exes because I was kinda asking him, "So do you do this with other people?" (the cuddling and kisses on the face and stuff) just to like, see where he was at with all of this, which lead to him being like, "No, unless we're talking about exes".

I ended up telling him how I've never been in a relo before (since he asked) and have only started using these dating apps seriously at the start of this year, and that I never really met anyone interesting and then he was all like, "Until you met me." LIKE. DAMN BOI. OKAY. I SEE HOW IT IS.

He was kissing me on the face every now and then, and at one point he asked “Can I kiss you?" and I non-verbally say yes, so he leaned in and kissed me and I'm just- LEKNFEKLWNF. I wanted this so bad, and it's finally happened! (This is the first and last time of him asking me that lmfao - every other time after this is him kissing me unabashedly and me kissing back. The first time he tried to make out with me, I kinda pushed him away because I wasn't feeling it too much, but after that I was like... Fuck it. I want this. I want him in whatever way I can have him. I caved really bad lmfaoooo.)

He was telling me how I smell good (my perfume is winning me points!), and I was like "you smell good too" because fuck me, he really does smell so good wlfknewklfn.

He kept calling me cute/adorable while cuddling up against me.

I'm wearing something deemed kinda hot for a day like today (I thought it was going to be cold but I guess not), and so he asked me "You sure you don't want to take that off? Or you could wear one of my shirts instead?" and I'm like UH NO IT'S FINE LWKENFLWEKNFKLN. I literally only had my singlet on under that shirt, and I also didn't really want to change lmfao.

At one point, we napped a bit; we woke up and ended up switching positions. I'm on the outside of the bed and he's on the inside.

More cuddling ensued. And when I say cuddling, he was like... Literally pressing up against me. You know the "bodies pressed flushed against each other" type of scenario? Yeah, that. Our legs were entangled, he was combing his fingers through my hair, he kissed me every now and then: all over my face, on my lips. (At one point, he was literally on top of me while we were making out, and that was when he started peeling back my turtleneck and trailing kisses down my jaw, then down to my neck LAKEJNFEWJKLNFEKLNF. And I was like "please don't leave any marks" LMFAOOOO. And yeah, he just kept doing that over and over again. At one point I wanted to be like “Can you kiss my neck more” BUT I WAS TOO SHY SJDKDK).

Told me, and I quote, "I could kiss you forever." So yeah. I'm just going to fucking combust somewhere, thank you!

He continued to call me adorable and cute, and I'm out here being like "stop lying, I'm not cute or adorable" and he's like "I'm not lying. You are adorable." We're like basically bantering every now and again lmao, and I end up calling him adorable at one point because he kinda is tbh.

But anyway, he was all like "you're so soft" and "you're so warm and cuddly" and "you're so cozy" and I'm just l;kJEWLKFNWEKLNF plEASEEEE I LIKE HIM SO MUCH LMFAO AND HIM SAYING ALL OF THAT IS NOT HELPING MY CASE.

He continuously checked on me to make sure I'm okay with him doing all of this, which I honestly really appreciate because it's just so like... Sweet? Told me if he's being too much then to let him know. And honestly, he wasn’t. He was being just right. I loved every bit of what he was doing to/with me, not even gonna lie. So I let him know I was okay with this, and that I was comfy with what he was doing.

We both were are being really clingy with each other, and were teasing each other about it and shit HAHA.

During all of this, he slipped in a, "So where are we going for the next date?" SKGNLWNKN. SOOOOO. I guess we're dating? (As much as I wanted to ask what exactly we were while we were all snuggled up against each other, I think I'll save that for after another few dates lmao.) At one point, when I had my head on his chest, I could hear his heart beating so fast, and when I asked, "Are you okay? You nervous?" he's like "I'm fine. Pretty sure that's the normal heart rate" so I'm all like "Yeeeeah, sureeeeee. Whatever you say." (My heart rate was through the roof, I checked my Apple Watch for my heart rate while he went to the bathroom and... Yeah. It told me everything I needed to know. I could practically feel it beating out of my chest and I was hoping he wasn't able to hear it wlkfnekwlnf).

AND OH GODDWELKFNWEKN at one point, he told me "Try kissing my neck. If not, I'm going to kiss your neck" and I was like "You're saying this like you haven't been kissing my neck already" LMFAOOO.

We dozed off every now and again while snuggled up against each other, and when we woke up, we'd cuddle some more. I had my leg over him and everything, much like a koala, and he was slotting his thigh between my legs and everything. Just... Pressed up against each other. Big spooning me at one point. Back hugging me. The lot. I was DYING the whole time.

All I can say is that this man got so fucking comfortable with me, and I loved every bit of it. That's how fucked I am.

Did I mention how he kept telling me I should stay the night? And I kept saying "I want to but I can't." Like, just before I left he was like "Are you sure you don't want to stay the night?" ELWKNFEKLWN He wanted me to stay the night so bad, and I wanted to stay the night so bad (and I let him know, saying shit like "I want to so bad but I can't" and "I don't want to leave but I have to" because if I didn't, my parents would most definitely kill me lmao).

The first time he asked me that and I said no, he was like "Maybe next time", but then he kept asking me again after that anyway LMAO. I was kinda fuelling him on since I flip flopped between "Maybe I should stay" and "But nah."

And oh GoddddDDD, I was like "I won't see you again for a bit because of how busy you're going to be for the next few weeks" and he was all like "Yeah, so let's cherish this moment."

And yeah... At one point, I told him "I wanna stay here tonight because I know I'm gonna miss you once I leave but I gotta go home". So uh. Basically a confession and a half on my part LMAO.

Who knew clingy me was also very unfiltered? Though I will say, there were other things I wanted to say to/tell/ask him but I kinda held back lol.

I also was like "You're going to have to teach me a lot of things" and he was like "So what do you want me to teach you?" and I got all flustered because of that EVEN THOUGH I WAS THE ONE WHO FUCKING MENTIONED IT LWEFNKLEWN.

And I also asked if I was too boring (since we were just laying there and cuddling and shit and I wasn't really initiating much LMFAO) and he was like, "No you're not."

And oh yeah, he also asked if I was feeling shy in a playful manner and I just ran with it and used it as an excuse whenever I didn't want to do something with him lmfao. He was never pushy about the things I didn’t want to do, though, and he really did stick to the, "Don't worry, we can take things slow."

AND JEJDKS his dad came home after work with pizza and I didn’t end up going down to eat anything because I wasn’t hungry, so I didn’t meet his dad… And then just as we were leaving the house so he can drive me home, I see his dad in the newly bought massage chair, sleeping away and I was like OOP-

Thank God none of his family saw me with messy fucking hair because that would have been bad 💀💀

He drove me home after that, I hugged him good night and kissed him, told him to message me when he got back home, and yeah. He messaged me and goes “can’t wait to cuddle more 🥰” or something like that, and I replied with “sameeee. I’m always down for some cuddles” 😭😭😭

So yeah. We basically spent the whole day cuddling. He kept kissing me all over the face. He kept calling me cute/adorable and cozy and comfortable and LKNEWKLFN. Complimented me and shit ahaha. We spent our sweet time kissing again and again and again lksnfewnf. We were just very, very affectionate with each other (I told him that he was very affectionate and cuddly and he was like “anything wrong with that?” and I was like “nope. I like it that way, at least with you” and he was like “I’m glad.” I let him know time and time again I'm new to this, and he kept reassuring me about it. I was all like "I'm not familiar with this" and he was basically like "Well, get familiar with it because I'm going to be doing this a lot."

AND YEAH. THAT'S BASICALLY WHAT HAPPENED. This recount is all over the place because I'm writing everything down as they come back to me rather than having the events be in order; everything has kind of blurred together lol, and some things aren't said verbatim.

TL;DR: We went out, then we went back to his home and spent like... 5-6 hours just cuddling in his bed before he drove me home. We made out so many fucking times, to the point where I've basically lost count on how many times we did that, he was whispering sweet nothings to me, he kept playing with my hair, he kissed me all over my face, kept pecking me on my lips, he was trailing kisses down my jaw and my neck, he didn't want me to go home, we were bantering here and there AND I think he wants a fourth date... So. Yeah.

[mihai-florescu]

Hello there tumblr user Mihai-floresuco.

I would like to ask of thee which stories you’d recommend of fine? I do not like the unit but I would like to like them so perhaps a better understanding of the characters shall aid me in this quest, thank you in advance and have a truly lovely day.

Yours truly,

Secret mutual :3

I am going to assume you've read the war era reminis, you are familiar with ex fine, what and why things happened, and your question is regarding current fine. I will also hope you've read Daydream and Blackbird as they explain a lot about the moments right after the war, from Eichi and Wataru's perspectives. Plus Eichi calls Yuzuru sexy, never forget.

Now, let's see, from the beginning. Flower fes is the first story with fine as we know it (minus Eichi as he was in the hospital), it's about Tori and Yuzuru meeting Wataru for the first time (among other things. It's also a good look into the state of things in the beginning of the next year right after the war. There's a good bit with Valkyrie as well)

Then other early ! Era stories would be Circus (fine perform at a circus, the scene that stood out the most to me is that of Eichi and the lion) and Quarrel Fes (Eichi Keito showdown mostly, it's good for understanding Eichi better)

Then Milky Way (fine and valkyrie, personally i'm due a complete reread), Jingle Bells (the one where Tori's illusions of fine as a perfect savior unit that can do no wrong and that hasn't done wrong in the past start dissipating), EP:link......i assume that if you follow me you've read eplink, but if not, i will not spoil it. The last story before the change of eras and it deals partially with fine's future.

Then for other stories i recommend when you have time: Magnolia (the best bridal enstars story imo, focused on Tori working around the school to buy Eichi a brooch for a gift exchange event), Dance Floor (they go to the park and then do karaoke at the end...), Triumph of the Emperor (an old story where Tori takes lead to prepare for a future where Eichi wouldn't be in fine anymore. This is all before we or they knew we'll have !! Era where the units stay together), Summer Live (undead and fine. Very unfortunate a good story is overshadowed by orientalist cards)

From the !! Era... um. I think there are some good one off idol stories, like the one with the parfait i remember seeing a tl for, but i dont know the name of it (i suspect it's somewhere in tori or eichi's idol stories). The best fine story in !! imo is Tempest. I also recommend if you end up enjoying fine Fist of the shangri la idol. And Sanctuary.........i feel like you should only read it after you already like Eichi or you might not have the best time... If you want to read anything else go ahead, but I can't guide you (I was unsatisfied with Primavera, and haven't yet read Ghostic. I enjoyed the livetweets for Atlantis but you can't find a full tl of it anywhere yet afaik and I'm not gonna recommend the !! climax to someone who is just getting started with fine as a whole anyway)

I hope I haven't talked for too long... if you need ex fine recs too, i'd say Element first and foremost, Checkmate for Eichi & Tsumugi's early relationship, and Wonder Game. Oh and Altered Origins. It's still a fever dream of a story to me personally, i haven't fully wrapped my head around the fact that we are getting the remini animes and extra stories yet. I mean I have, but you know, it still feels a bit surreal.

If anyone feels like I forgot any important fine stories please add to the conversation. If you end up interested in Wataru and Eichi in particular I'd also recommend Diner Live, but it is not a fine story. I've heard Toyland is good for Tori (Yuzuru too?) but I haven't personally read it yet. If you want more Wataru and Tori interactions, Amusement Live has some good scenes, but it is not that much about them, the story's about Ra*bits and 2wink. A story i enjoyed of fine members shenanigans sans Wataru is Noble Game. We shall see when White Brim gets translated, I know it has some good bits with Tori&Eichi. Hm hm hm. That's all I can think of at the top of my head rn, but I think I've already said more than enough...

[myfaveisfuckable]

Tuvok:

Ok, first off: real world standards, he's not normal passing. Apart from the ears, he's just too autistic (sorry, "Vulcan" 🙄) to be considered "normal looking". He went to 1990s earth once and Did Not Pass as normal. But in universe, he would on the surface seem like a model Vulcan. And he is, kinda. But he's also so gd weird. (/aff)

Not even gonna get into how badly he wants to be Will Graham because obviously that's there too but we don't have all day. Anyway.

Obvs the emotions struggle is real as it is for any Vulcan worth paying attention to, if only because they were all only ever written by humans.

But also, tangential to him being Will Graham coded (but still separate enough) he is a total mind slut. You know how some characters will go "when I have a problem, I set it on fire" or shit like that? When Tuvok has a problem, he mind melds with it. Homoerotically if it's an option. Dude even got a mind std one time, despite the fact that's not even a thing.

And then whatever the fuck kinda thing he has going on with Janeway. Not even necessarily in a shippy way ("not romantic, not platonic, so devoted the lines blur") but like... not only is he unreasonably loyal to her but he does shit like not only letting her touch him whenever she wants but *deliberately offering her HIS HAND to hold* to comfort her when she needs it (reminder that hand touching is very intimate to Vulcans and can be likened to human kissing) and again, they're never even stated as romantic or anything, they're just friends and yet he is more loyal to her than he is to his own code of ethics.

Obviously part of all of it could be because Janeway (or possibly Kate Mulgrew) is simply Like That, she does do shit like tell her platonic subordinate "then be a good rat and find us the cheese" in a tone that makes me lose it, but it's not all her, Tuvok is also extremely not normal about it. I should submit Janeway too actually, I'll do her next.

Also, afaik Tuvok is the only crew member of Voyager (who makes it back) who had a romantic partner before the ship got lost in the Delta quadrant and remained loyal the entire seven years they were lost. I *think* Samantha Wildman also did but she's a minor character (so she could've been getting it off screen) and she started out pregnant so once born Naomi both kept her busy and was a living reminder of her husband's love. So in that regard, Tuvok is very much not normal but like in the most positive way. He literally didn't cheat on his wife even when his life was in danger (they *were* out there for seven years so of course he hit pon farr eventually) and I think that's really cool of him. But also very not normal.

I'm very tired rn but once the polls come out, simply check out the blog of Bea bumblingbabooshka (wanna clarify, I'm not him but he is THE Tuvok blogger in my opinion) who has written much on this already.

There's also the whole stuff that happened around his monestary era but I'm not even at that part yet but it must've been wild.

Anyway. Vote Tuvok

Jekyll:

he can't remember the last time he slept. he hates himself so much he literally used mad science to create an entire ass guy to blame his problems on but accidentally made it so he can never be truly happy because uh oh! the silly magic mountain dew turned that into a man! now he can't fuck! whoa!

[hardpacker]

nbd i'm just processing for a min

got jumpscared to death by sh*nth's sister appearing on my twitter TL, never happened before ever, but afaik she's normal and decent... just like totally caught me by surprise. hey, you know that dumb motherfucker put an ayn rand quote on the back of his new reactionary c*micsg*te piece of shit? literally follows like interacts with jordan peterson... i say interacts but there are no interactions iykwim... he put the swastika and the sickle and hammer side by side in a BOOK OF EVIL or some shit because he's afraid of cultural marxism on school campuses (not a problem due to having been shitcanned) and like, idk why but he made his protagonist be protestant for some reason. These are memories from ~2020 but sometimes you just. remember

i'm okay i'm okay i'm okay but sometimes i remember the perfectly-designed-to-make-me-insane teamup when local white power guy r**gan l*dge interviewed him within the last few years. man. i was going thru it for like a month, constantly churning thru the cycle, totally keyed up, every thought occupied by fear and like remembering things or obsessively trying to remember things i'd forgotten because if i forgot them it meant they stopped being real and no one would believe me because there was no one else to remember them. it makes me want to cry now THINKING— not about whatever dumb old shit— but about how upset i was when it came around again. like it's sad that i was in that place. anyway he said the most deranged out of pocket bullshit that even reagan was like laughing and backing away from it. Masterful gambit sir

[system-of-a-feather]

For the ask game, 💫😂🤯💌

💫 How do you experience switches (what does it feel/look like for you)?

It varies WIDELY between parts. Generally speaking, our system is very predominantly in possessive switches where a lot of the time one part is out and then "taps out" to another. The fluidity of these vary greatly between which parts are switching out and can look decently different but largely for parts that are "well connected" and more integrated - given its not a negative trigger - we often very much "tap out" where usually one part either asks another that is near the front to swap out or using positive triggers to help ground another part out. For the really well connected / synergized parts like XIV and I, we can pretty frequently and relatively easily co-front for extended periods of time where we are both simultaneously out and have frequently done things like playing chess against each other and other activities with our fiance. For less connected parts, there tends to be a decent more haze between it, and less of a "tap out" and more of a "loading" and "swapping out between files". For any negative triggered switches - save for specific ones - it can be a pretty sudden swap around of this sense.

For specific alters - often those sharing a subsystem, its mostly non-possessive and its really annoying within my subsystem as we have a long standing meme / issue with parts assuming they are Riku TM (my specific subsystem part nickname) and or another part in the subsystem and taking a minute to figure that out. Usually it looks like a mood swing afaik but most of the time we don't notice it until whatever part switched out was there for a hot minute and either they do something so "out of character" for it to be me or our fiance points it out that they realize they are actually them.

Usually though our parts have rather clear switches where its alter A or B or A and B.

😂 Favourite system story?

(TW; fusion talk, cannibalism jokes, alter death jokes for this question)

We have a lot, but I think one of the most hilarious ones is that at some point while navigating my subsystem as we realized it was a Thing TM, we found that at some point I had actually introjected our main gatekeeper - Ray - which peeved the shit out of him cause there was "another him running around with his face but being like a dollar store rip off that was fucking stupid" - and that guy only appeared like three times and then just never was heard from again. We coined him "Rayku" cause Ray-Riku and all. But anyways the subsystem and system was like "lol where did he go. I mean not complaining cause he was a problem child TM and we don't currently need him but brain where tf did he go" for like a year or two

We made a lot of half memes and conspiracy theories and then at some point our secondary gatekeeper and "crackhead" little just walked up - cause she speaks full bullshit and barely speaks - and was like "I put him in the meat grinder and fed him to XIV in a burger" and like, half the shit she says has a grain of truth in the chaos - so our system was like UH. What does THAT mean? And THAT lasted for like a few months of a lot of system dynamics and processing going on before XIV went ".... huh you know I think I fused with Rayku at some point without knowing"

And so what we are PRETTY sure is the case is that she just casually slid the two together at some point since they were compatible or something (Rayku was decently a fragment); but like... we've just kept the meme that she killed him and fed him to XIV, cause XIV likes cannibalism jokes anyways and has a bad oral fixation anyways so its believable and no parts read it as a trauma or trigger.

I am going to say here that alter death and killing alters is NOT a thing and we are not claiming that is what happened, just that the child gatekeeper in our head claims it is and we think its a funny, fitting, and harmless meme so we keep it in our "history" records like that.

🤯 Did you have a “oh damn I’m really not faking this” moment?

Probably at some point, but I honestly forgot it since it was a while ago and I have a memory disorder and just living with this has become such a normal for me that I haven't been asked to recall it in a while so, like... just kinda forgot what it was like to actually worry about faking it.

I think somewhere along the lines of sorting out my subsystem I was just like huh. Okay this is too hot bullshit for me to be faking this; or something like that. I'm mainly guessing cause I genuinely do not remember XD

💌 how did you choose your system name?

We all love birds, birds could be described as a "system of feathers", theres a saying "birds of a feather flock together", we all have bird representatives in our system, a bird can't properly bird without all the feathers working together, our system can't function properly without all the feathers working together, we used to believe strongly and now less intently but still like to think that systems of a feather should flock together - ie people struggling with the same disorder should be supportive to one another to the best of ability (we are just apathetic about community spaces at this point).

So like, all together it felt right to call us a System of a Feather; cause its a round about way of saying "Bird", it is highly representative of our system, and it has a double meaning / call back to the "birds of a feather" both in regards to ourselves and fellow systems we talk to.

As much as I have grown rather apathetic to being part of a DID community, I do though still think the best way forward for us and many systems would be to share "notes" with eachother on healing and recovery to help everyone's healing the best. I think there is a lot of efficiency, safety and power in sharing lessons you learned the hard way to others so that even if they can't deeply understand it themselves, having it out there in the world and in their mindspace can possibly help accelerate healing and help people get where they want to be faster. Which that idea is still of the "systems of a feather should flock together" which underlies the main reason I still run this blog even though I otherwise don't care much for the community itself.

I personally think its a very very mild effort and time out of my day to share thoughts, my "notes" while I heal, and have open conversations with people who are either at or behind me in their healing journey, and my small efforts and time could possibly make huge changes for others; so I personally think it is part of my good samaritan duty to share things I think that might be helpful to an audience that thinks what I post is helpful if it really doesn't take much time or effort out of my life and day. Its a small good deed that has the potential to keep people going so, why not.

Systems of a feather, even if the DID community at large has its problems, should flock together because ya know, when waterfowl migrate, a large reason they do so together is because flying in another's windpath saves TONS of energy for everyone involved. There is little harm in making a small detour to make everyone have an easier time so ya know.

(brief neglect mention tw)

Anyways me being a fucking shounen anime protagonist aside with my monologues, the url and system name just pretty much ties down to the "birds of a feather" saying and the fact that we identify as a bird - not in an otherkin or non-human manner (well not most of us, some yes) but just in the cultural manner since we unironically identify as being raised by cockatiels more than our actual parents.

[fae-fucker]

Zenith: Chapter 90-94

Chapter 90

We’re in Lira’s POV. She’s brainwashed and thinks Nor is the bee’s knees and is totes chill with Nor slicing her aunt’s throat open like a weeb demolishing a watermelon with his katana.

This chapter is 161 words long and entirely pointless.

Chapter 91

THE NIGHTMARE HAD NOT CEASED.

Yeah, I’m surprised, too. 98 chapters? Woof.

We’re with Dex again, who’s panicking about how Andi and the general are bleeding out and he can’t do shit about it. He’s all sad and dramatic as per usual, hiding behind a bar and thinking about how useless he is for not being able to protect Andi, the love of his live and all that.

Then the general is like “hey, idiot, remember the secret passages Andi mentioned conveniently several chapters ago?” and Dex is like “oh, yeah! those exist!” and orders a nearby bartender bot to haul the general’s dying ass into the secret tunnel built into the bar while he takes Andi.

We don’t get a description of the tunnel, how large it is, how exactly it’s built into the bar, how it opens, how comfortably everyone can fit in it, how difficult it is for Dex to get through it while holding Andi ... You know, stuff that might actually be good to know that could increase the tension? Instead Dex just ... does it. And then at the end of the chapter he’s miraculously on the Marauder and flying away. Because convenient. I guess Shinsay have had enough excitement for now, time for everything to do a Todd Howard and just work.

Chapter 92

We’re back with Androma and OH MY FUCKING GOD IT’S JUST A FLASHBACK TO SHIT WE ALREADY KNOW WITH NO NEW INFO FOR THE SAKE OF DRAMA

IT’S ANOTHER FUCKING FLASHBACK TO KALEE’S DEATH

OH MY FUCKING GOD I’M SO FUCKING TIRED OF THIS BITCH DYING OVER AND OVER AGAIN WE GET IT, WE KNOW HOW SHE DIED, THERE WAS A CRASH AND A FIRE AND BLOOD EVERYWHERE AND ANDI WAS TRAUMATIZED AND YADDA YADDA

WE

FUCKING

GET

IT.

Fuck you. Fuck this chapter. I’m so fucking done with this.

Chapter 93

We’re back with Dex again and find out that the general is bleeding out, since Lon (he’s also there, hi) only has so much blood to give as a universal donor.

Now, I know there’s not any science in this science-fiction book, but Andi’s blood is red and her species is never specified, which I assume makes her human-equivalent and the stuff that makes her blood red is hemoglobin, which is also the thing that carries the oxygen into the organs aka that thing blood has to do that’s kind of important. We also know that Lon’s blood is blue.

So ... how exactly is this dude a “universal donor?” Across species? Like, human blood isn’t universal within our own species, so you’d assume that if someone’s blood is BLUE then whatever the fuck is in it is probably not good for you, right?

But no, I guess his blood is universally compatible across species because that’s one of his “mutations” that he got from his planet’s “radiation event.” How convenient! What a useful and not at all contrived worldbuilding element!

Also, wasn’t Lon shot a couple days ago? In the chest? You’d think he’d need his blood for his own purposes, like survival, but I guess Andi takes priority. He’s just such a giving soul, our Lon.

Dex pesters the general into telling what the fuck went down that made Valen do that shit, and the general is like “why yes, allow me to monologue while I’m bleeding out from my chest wound” like he’s recording an audio log for a horror video game protagonist to find before he perishes.

But we can’t have him actually tell it, of course. For one, it’d highlight how verbose he is for someone who’s gushing blood out of a stab wound. And it would also mean Shinsay couldn’t use their favorite storytelling device: the dearly detested flashback!

Time to finally figure out what the FUCK is going on! In chapter 94 out of 98!

Chapter 94

TW: Rape mention

Another all-italics fare. It’s Klaren’s POV and it’s year twenty-six! Anyone keeping track? I’m not.

Anyway, she’s recently given birth to Valen, who she says is even stronger than Nor but whom she doesn’t like very much because he’s not her love-baby.

She goes to Cyprian and tries to demand that he takes her back to Xen Ptera and allows him to bring Valen with her, but this time, her compulsion powers don’t work on him as he’s been building up a resistance over the years.

She manages to convince him, she assumes, and we find out that she’s been keeping his resistance from building by raping him every night, since exhaustion made him weaker. Charming.

Klaren says that Cyprian will return her and Valen to Xen Ptera and then forget any of this ever happened, and Cyprian is like “yup all good” and Klaren is all smug about how she’s finally won.

Freedom was within her grasp. And when her children met, when they combined the strength of the abilities that she’d felt in both of them...she could almost feel the distant Conduit tremble, even from here.

The galaxy did not stand a chance.

I’m including this so I don’t have to recap it and because AFAIK it has to do with the plot of Nexus? So there ya go. I’m so helpful today.

Next recap post will be the last!

Are you guys excited? I’m excited. For this to end, that is.

[sally-mun]

Since that last question is off the table, how's about this: How would the Brotherhood handle the events of Sonic Unleashed? Do they have any knowledge of the Gaia Prophecy? Would Chaos be the one to keep the oceans from draining like he is in the reboot? And would this finally be the catastrophe that gets Knuckles to finally meet his family, or would this happen way later down the line? Would the brotherhood be prepared in the SLIGHTEST for the planet shattering like that?

I've got to admit first that I never finished Sonic Unleashed because, outrageously bad game design choices aside, I initially played the Wii version and oh my god the Werehog's controls on narrow suspended ledges made the game unbeatable for me. It made me so angry that I've never tried the Xbox 360 version despite owning it and having heard it's better. OKAY, confessions are out of the way, onward and sideways.

So I think it's safe to say that this would have to be late enough in the timeline that Knuckles would definitely know the rest of his family by this point. Maybe I'm biased on that, because I'm looking at it through the lens of my own RP. I know the events of Unleashed aren't in the RP's backstory, which can thus only mean that if they occur at all it's only in the future.

As far as the Brotherhood's handling of it, I think it'd be a really strong shock to their system -- partly because they're more or less 'retired' at this point in the game, and partly because they can't just ignore this shit, it will definitely affect them and their people. Historically the BH tends to keep to their own business and leave the surface world to its problems, but they can't fall back on that philosophy now. For one thing, Angel Island ain't even a thing anymore, so now "the surface world" is necessarily their problem because they live there. Another is the fact that a global catastrophe means they can't just bury their heads and look out strictly for the echidnas, either. What happens to the rest of the world will undoubtedly have consequences for Albion, because C'MON GUYS THE PLANET'S KINDA IN PIECES RIGHT NOW. IF THERE'S SOMETHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT THAT, YA MIGHT WANNA GET ON IT.

So I suppose that means the biggest takeaway is that it would force the Brotherhood to get involved with other hero groups and be cooperative, especially with there being so few individuals that can use chaos on the scale that they can. I want to say they'd probably be oblivious to the idea of Gaia or its related texts, if just because they spent so long isolated on Angel Island before it went down and they haven't really spent their time on the surface learning about their neighbors. Safe to say they'd be pretty blindsided by the entire situation but probably also trying to give the impression that they should hold some form of authority. Because, well, they're the BH, why wouldn't they think that?

What makes it a little... I don't know, I don't want to say "sad" or "disappointing," but something in that vein, is that by "The Brotherhood" I really only mean Sojourner, Thundy, and Sabre at this point. Spectre has been bedridden for a while, Athair ascended into some Walker-like astral plane or something afaik, and Moritori.... well I mean we DID do one RP years ago where Knuckles found him out in the world trying to live a normal life, but my god he was already so old at that point, and now that it's been even more years since then, he's probably dead by now. Honestly that one session where Knux tracked him down was SO early in the RP too that a lot of backstory wasn't concretely established yet, so I don't even know if that's canon anymore. I DON'T KNOW RP CAN BE WILD SOMETIMES. Anyway my point is that Sojo, Thundy, and Sabre are the BH equivalent of the Three Stooges these days so that'd be an extra layer of "lol wtf are they doing--"

[amandabe11man]

Okay here’s my little essay about why I think lawrence’s victory over hoffman in Saw 3D doesn’t make sense from a narrative standpoint.

I don’t claim to be a perfect storyteller or anything (like, at all), but while I like Lawrence, my bullshit-sensors are tingling every time I think about the conclusion of this franchise.

yeah I know, I'm looking really dumb trying to bring logic into the goddamn Saw-movies, but just hear me out...:

first of all, we need to talk about Lawrence in comparison to the other apprentices. I’m not the first one to point out that lawrence’s reasons for helping John are pretty much never mentioned ever. I made a post earlier on about how I felt it wasn’t meant to be that way (because it seemed like just another ‘BET YOU DIDN’T SEE THAT COMING’-twist ending) but an anon clarified that there actually were hints through the earlier movies that Lawrence would become a jigsaw-apprentice, so that theory of mine was debunked, just so we’re clear.

ANYWAY where was I? yeah, about Lawrence. just like all the characters, he’s layered. he’s a regular joe just living life, trying to be a good person while still making bad choices. he’s flawed, but again, who isn’t? that’s why it’s so whack to see him return again in 3D, all slow-clapping and obviously villainous. like- I know it’s been a few years since the first movie then, but where the hell did that personality change come from? from getting a divorce? c’mon, anyone could see that coming even back in the first movie. move on, man. and aside from that little detail + the flashback of how John took him in and made him an apprentice, we don’t get anything else about how Lawrence’s life supposedly took a dive after all that. it’s just nada up until 3D.

now, to put things into perspective, think about how Amanda and Hoffman’s reasons for helping John both made a lot more sense given what kind of people they were (I mean yeah, hoffman was blackmailed, but he killed anyway before that). amanda was a vulnerable drug-addict, bent on self-destruction. until she died, working for John gave her a new sense of purpose in life; one she thought she could handle, even though she couldn’t in the end. it wasn’t meant to be, and she even admits it. of course her helping John at all after what he did to her is illogical, but if you think about the kind of person Amanda was, you can see why she would do that. that way, it makes sense.

now, hoffman is hoffman, I get it. guy’s a douche, but this franchise has a lot of those. his corruption-arc also makes sense though, when you take into account what he’s been through. his sister was murdered, the killer didn’t get punished, and he took the law into his own hands, and he just kinda kept going after that until John made him agree to be an apprentice.

what I'm saying is: Amanda and hoffman being apprentices doesn’t feel foreign when you think about their circumstances. now, Lawrence was traumatized after the bathroom, sure. he cut his foot off and got crazy enough to try to kill Adam. he “had” to make the choice between his family or killing Adam. given how he’s a doctor, knowing that he almost killed a man must surely keep him up at night sometimes. because he’s supposed to save people, not kill them.

it’d be helpful though, if we got to see literally anything of this. give the viewer a reason to believe why Lawrence, a well-off doctor, would do a heel-turn to help a serial killer who targeted him and his family. my best guess is that after Alison divorced him (and presumably took Diana with her), he just felt he might as well not gaf about being a good man anymore, because now he only lives for himself. his family can’t be in danger if they’re not even in his life anymore, right? i suppose that sort of spite could be enough of a reason for him to go off the deep end, but it’s still a weak reason to help the serial killer who had it out for you and helped put you in that situation to begin with.

this could be the reason, if it wasn’t for the fact that the first time he met with his family again after the bathroom, Lawrence had already been made into a jigsaw-apprentice. brainwashed or not, he’d already made the choice before a divorce had even happened, so that just adds another level of confusion to all this.

so yeah, the ending to 3D happens, and we return to where this all started; the bathroom. and this time, Lawrence is the one to shut the door on someone who, in a way, deserves it. Justice is served, and all that. but when you think about it... there’s not much poetic justice in Lawrence locking hoffman in there at all. why? because hoffman wasn’t involved in the bathroom-trap back when it happened to Adam and Lawrence.

wouldn’t it have come into a much more satisfying full circle if Lawrence had locked John, or even Amanda, in there, since they were the ones responsible for his particular trap? having him lock John in there would of course be the BEST option, since Amanda used to be just another victim as well. therefore, having John be put into a trap of his own, and by one of his victims no less, would just have been--  like, so good. just mirroring john’s actions at the end of 1 where he left Adam to die, thereby giving a nice little conclusion to how Lawrence felt about that too. Adam wasn’t given a choice in the end, so Lawrence will leave John there the same way. yeah, he’s dead since Saw 3, but just imagine a scenario where he’d stayed alive somehow till the end, where he wouldn’t have been able to die on his own terms. THAT’S poetic justice, baby!

but no, instead we get Lawrence taking revenge for Jill on john’s behalf, because...? why does he care about Jill? what’s stopping Lawrence from just bailing as soon as John died? Hoffman got the short end of the stick because he just wasn’t likable to enough people, I suppose. but when you think deeper about it, he has no connection to the bathroom whatsoever. there are no parallels to be had between him and that place. if we wanna be logical about it, have him end up in a trap of his own making instead, or better yet; have Strahm survive and be the one to put him in that trap of his own making, since they had their whole cat-and-mouse-dynamic going on. they had a history and it would make sense for Strahm to finally be the one to kill him. but who is Lawrence to hoffman? dunno, bc the movie doesn’t care to tell us that little detail.

i suppose the conclusion is that I can see why they would have Lawrence shut someone in the bathroom, because parallels n shit. my issue is mostly with how the one being shut in there never personally wronged Lawrence, afaik. hoffman has done a lot of shit to warrant punishment, but not when it’s dished out by Lawrence, because he never did anything to him. still, we’re supposed to cheer for Lawrence for this, when we barely know of his circumstances. all I see is a weird favoritism towards Lawrence from john’s side.  after all, he did always respectfully(?) refer to Lawrence as “dr. gordon”, while almost all his other victims were addressed by their first names. (very weird, since John was mad enough at Lawrence to put him in a trap. but go off I guess) not to mention, Lawrence failed to (attempt to) kill Adam on time, but hey, he cut off his foot in desperation to get out, so uh... guess that makes him worthy, in john’s eyes? doesn’t change the fact that Lawrence failed his “game”.

not only did he fail in that regard, but before then, he failed in his marriage, he wasn’t there for Diana as much as he should’ve been, he failed his crazy patient, and he failed Adam by not sending help back for him for some reason (that’s a whole different post that someone else has already made though, lol). throughout the whole series, Lawrence has been rewarded when he shouldn’t have been, basically. sure, he’s estranged from his family, but that’s about the only setback that he’s endured since John let him go that first time. by the time 3D rolls around, he’s cynical, but he seems to be doing just fine anyway.

and that’s the very long reason why I think that Lawrence essentially getting the last laugh in the original franchise doesn’t sit right with me. boom

[chaoticspacefam]

OC Music Meme

I was tagged for this by @actualanxiousswampwitch ! Thank you & sorry it took so long, didn’t have time to write this out before I left for holiday stuff so here we go! I shall tag: @actualanxiousswampwitch (go on give us another one XD), @a-muirehen​ , @kyber-heart​ , @thedinalixlegacy​ (no pressure as always, I know I’m kinda late now sksjkshskhs!) and anyone else who wants to do this, yes, I promise I mean you!

art is by @ ocellifera on deviantART! :D

Let’s do Aria this time, shall we! Since her playlist is the second-longest, and her and Vano’s ship playlist is the longest, we’ll have the most (probable options! Long post so goin’ under a cut. Additional TW’s for: drugs, alcohol, alcoholism, drug addiction and murder, in case I’ve forgotten to add it to the song-specific sections. If you click past this cut, know that this is what you may find there.

reminds you of them most: It was super hard to pick just three for hers, there were so many others I wanted to include here, but couldn’t, as I wanted to make sure I included songs that covered as much of her over-arching characterisation as I could. Honourable mentions to: Miss Jackson - Panic! At The Disco feat. LOLO, Wilson (Expensive Mistakes) - Fall Out Boy, Beekeeper - Keaton Henson, and Bones Of A Rabbit - Young Heretics, which can all be found (and more) on her Spotify Playlist - catch-all warning for: sex, drugs, violence and murdering of parents applies here, be aware her playlist is very dark, just as dark as Rai’s but with differing subject matter, proceed with caution if you find anything like that triggering!)

You’re Going Down - Sick Puppies :: This one is kinda self-explanatory. I heard it on a Spotify or Youtube shuffle at some point a year or so ago and immediately went “Oh, hey Aria!” so onto her playlist it went XD “Because I'm hyped up out of control If it's a fight, I'm ready to go I wouldn't put my money on the other guy If you know what I know that I know.”  don’t mess with the Tiny Sith, guys, she will put you in the medbay. She’ll do it, she’s done it before ask Vano what happened to the last guy *nods*

Liar - The Arcadian Wild :: This is a relatively “new” song in comparison, which was sent to me by a good rp/writer friend on Discord (who afaik doesn’t have other socials!) that I often discuss plot points etc. with among other things, saying “hey this reminded me of Aria thought you’d like it!”. I listened to it and yep, sure enough, it’s an Aria song. A big part of Aria’s character is that at the start, she really is quite a bad person. She’s nasty, and cantankerous and she really doesn’t care about anybody except for herself (and maybe her dad. A tiny bit.), as things progress, however, while she is still inherently quite rude and selfish, she DOES learn to value other people...provided they are people she cares about, like Vano, and her friends, and so on,  as well as (sometimes, she’s working on it still) taking the blame for her own actions and learning it’s not “weak” or bad to a) admit you care about people, b) make mistakes and c) admit those mistakes and take responsibility for them. "I sense there’s trouble ahead, it’s clear by the signs and warnings. That should tell where all blame is due, So why are they pointing at MY head? [...] I sense deception to come. Honestly, truth and I are never one. 'Cause I am the lying man and I have made you my next victim. I need you to see through my act, to tell me I'm wrong, to take off the mask, or else I'll be left in the lie. And I'll deceive my way straight to demise! Cause I’m not in the right state of mind, I just wish I had strength to admit it. My stubbornness will put up a fight! But I don’t deserve to win it... I’m left in the dark, pondering my mistakes But in the light I swear I will, deny it all...” 

I didn’t mean to post like half the song but woops it’s done so have it anyway lmao

Brutus - The Buttress :: TW: intense violent imagery in the lyrics. This one is very relevant but contains spoilers for upcoming and as of yet unposted/incomplete chapters (as in...like 3 ish chapters time at most) of Creeping Shadows, so I’ll post this quote as “explanation” and let you theorize who it’s about

“My name is Brutus and my name means “heavy” So with a heavy heart I'll guide this dagger into the heart of my Enemy! My whole life you were a teacher and friend to me Please know my actions are not motivated only by envy I too have a destiny! This death will be art! The people will speak of this day from near and afar This event will be history, And I'll be great too! I don't want what you have, I wanna be you!!“

reminds another character of them:

Where’s My Love? - SYML :: (Vano) I think the acoustic version is especially emotional : ))) Vano looked for her for years but couldn’t find her and genuinely thought Aria was dead. You can understand why she was so fucking angry when she found out that was a lie...but at the same time, she just wanted her love to come home :( “Did she run away? Did she run away? I don't know If she ran away, If she ran away, Come back home Just come home“

Mothers - Daughter :: (Myla, her mother) “Love all you need to love before it goes... When your face becomes a stranger’s that I don’t know. You will never remember who I was to you [...] I’m called “mother”, but they’re called “home”.”

Myla raised Aria for the first few years of her life, and really wanted to keep her away from both the Jedi and the Sith but as it became more and more clear that Aria’s Force affinity was as strong as her father’s, the situation rapidly spiralled out of Myla’s control. She tried to hide Aria, but in the end her father Noctis did find them and take Aria to train with the Sith. She didn’t see her daughter again until she was a teenager, suddenly turning up with the task to kill her for treason against the Empire (Myla is not the canon Imp Agent, but follows the general trajectory of the LS!Agent storyline i.e. an agent disillusioned with the Empire who eventually defects to the Republic with the help of the SIS.). Though she’s a Senator on Onderon now, Myla carried a blaster for personal protection and ofc knows how to use it, except...she couldn’t shoot her own daughter and that was all she wrote. I imagine her thought process during her final moments went something like in this song, especially the bit that I highlighted up there.

reminds you of a relationship of theirs, doesn’t have to be romantic, can be paternal, friendly, etc:

Tongues & Teeth - The Crane Wives :: Aria & Vano (Romantic). Aria’s relationship with Vano is incredibly messy and complicated. On one hand, she knows Vano deserves better, but at the same time she doesn’t want her to go anywhere else and it seems like no matter what she does to try and “warn her off” about what a “bad person” she is, Vano keeps coming back anyway. Ergo, this song. "Oh, I will ruin you. I will ruin you. It’s a habit...I can’t help it. I know that you mean so well, but I am not a vessel for your good intent. I will only break your pretty things, I will only wring you dry of everything! But if you’re fine with that, if you’re fine with that [...] You can be mine.”

Colours - Halsey :: Aria & Merak & Ziri (Friendship/Platonic Love) “You’re only happy when your sorry head is filled with dope, I hope you make it to the day you’re 28 years old...”

Aria “coped” (i.e. not very well but she did it) with the guilt of killing her mother and the stress brought on by the night terrors by self-medicating with glitterstims (spice) and alcohol, and this is how Merak in particular remembers her. Though she got clean from spice after they picked up Ziri, she still continued to drink (and still does) quite heavily, though at least it’s easier to manage that habit. Both of them supported her through this the best they could and it’s probably a big reason (other than Merak being Vano’s little brother) that they’re still Aria’s friends to this day, even if she doesn’t actively travel with them anymore.

(honourable mention to Agnes - Glass Animals which also falls under this “category” but I didn’t want this to get too crowded lmao, it is once again a super long post woops) You’re Gonna Go Far, Kid - The Offspring :: Aria & Roan/Darth Noctis (Familial/Familial Love) Listen, he may have taught her very bad emotional habits and turned her into a tiny attack dog, but her father did love & protect her the best way he possibly could. He was very proud of her and always envisioned her taking his place as a Darth one day (and it takes her a longass while, but eventually she does! Congrats dad!). That’s all I’ve got to say about this one 🤷‍♀️ Monster - Willyecho :: Aria & Satele Shan/The Jedi Order (Enemies to Begrudging Respect (eventually) “I can see the truth. No, you don’t have to lie to me. Don’t fill your head with things and think you’re free~ [...] You don’t believe in monsters, do you~?” ”Of course not!” ”Well, I do...” See me change...into something...darker....” My personal favourite from this “round”. It’s not until Ilum that Satele and the Jedi finally realise they have not “converted” Aria as they thought they did, but rather...they’ve had a Sith hiding under their noses, a Sith related to a Dark Councillor well-known for murdering Jedi no less, and that perhaps...the “deaths” she had convinced them were accidental, were in fact, not an accident at all. 😈 Aria, of course, gets her ass thrown in jail for a few years for this lmao When the schtick with the Revanites happens and Theron needs someone who can “negotiate in a civil manner with Sith”, he and his mother agree Aria is the best bet - if it works, the Sith will respond more positively to her than any other Jedi, if they kill her instead then they’re “rid of” her and don’t lose one of their own - when Lana’s point-of-contact happens to be Vano and the pair reunite after another several years apart, Aria refuses to return to the Republic after Yavin IV. By then, she’s developed enough of a begrudging respect for Satele (and vice versa) that the Grand Master lets her go (not that she was willing to try and fight Vano, Ni’kasi, Marr & Lana to try and take Aria prisoner again anyways). They haven’t seen each other since and though Aria is neutral to the Jedi who have joined the Alliance, she doesn’t care for those who are still loyal to the Republic and would rather have nothing to do with them if she can help it.

[purplesurveys]

671

So my school is indefinitely shifting to online classes starting this week and we aren’t having class again until April because of the coronavirus. Wild times.  Do you watch really old tv shows or movies from the 1970’s or earlier? Not shows, but movies. Gab introduced me to the Golden Age of Hollywood, and it’s really how we became close friends in the first place. It started with Breakfast at Tiffany’s, then Gone with the Wind, then Mildred Pierce, Waterloo Bridge...then it just kinda snowballed from there. I am a fan of a certain old show, but it ran from the mid-1980s to the early 90s – Perfect Strangers. Who’s your celebrity crush(es)? My top 3 would be Kristen Stewart, Hayley Williams, and Beyonce. I don’t like leaving any one of them out haha. What do you think of fake people? Sometimes you gotta do it, dude. Sometimes it’s not about being fake, it’s being polite and civil. What I do have a problem with is being two-faced with people who genuinely see you as a trusted friend. Whats a song you absolutely hate? I can’t fucking stand Demi Lovato’s new ballad, the one that starts off with “I tried to talk to my piano...” I also can’t stand most Halsey songs because of her voice. Ever been to a rave? Nah. I’ve always preferred parties, but I’m not opposed to trying out a rave at least just once. 

Are you afraid to name the person you talk the most shit about? Lmao not at all, but only because this Tumblr is private anyway. Patrice. I’d be a little more hesitant if this had a bit of an audience, though. Are you a jealous person? Not really jealous. I’d say envious is more fitting for me. Who do you text the most out of your friends? My girlfriend, def. I message everyone the equal amount on Messenger though because it’s where everyone is. Song playing right now? I don’t feel like listening to music right now. I do have Gabie on video call though, so some sounds on her end serve as background noise at the moment. Has anyone ever mistaken you for someone else? A few times. The weirdest interaction was when a masseuse for my mom came over one evening – and she’s supposed to be a psychic or recognize the supernatural or whatever – and she asked me if I was currently pregnant. Are you really interested in the lives of celebrities like Miley Cyrus?
 I’m not invested but if I come across an article, I’d take a few minutes to read. I wouldn’t voluntarily go to gossip websites or buy celebrity magazines though. What would you do if you saw a complete stranger dealing drugs in public?
 Probably wouldn’t do anything as I don’t wanna be entangled in shady businesses like that. If you don’t have to be up by a certain time, do you like to sleep in as late as possible?
 Sleeping in sounds wonderful, but my body generally doesn’t allow me to. I’m usually fully awake by 8 or 9. What did you buy the last time you went clothes shopping?
 I got two of the same Filipiniana-inspired tops but in different colors, one yellow and one black. How many books do you think you read in a month?
 Zero. Not really a secret on this blog anymore but I don’t read much, ha. How often do you play video games? What are some of your favourites?
 Uhhhh not a lot. I never did get the hang of video games so you will only ever see me playing easy and kiddie ones lmao, like Mario Kart. I tried playing Resident Evil on my own once, couldn’t get through the literal first and easiest mission because I kept dying. Anyway, my favorite may have to be GTA San Andreas - lots of memories with that baby, even though I did always just watch my cousins and dad do all the video gaming. What are a few things that get on your nerves when it comes to Facebook (or your social networking site of choice)?
 Boomers sharing pubmats with awful layout/graphics, boomers sharing daily Bible verses, and boomers being stubborn about fake news. Do you keep a hand-written journal or diary?
 I used to. But Tumblr’s served as my diary for the last seven or so years now, too. What are three things you’ve started to like lately? BOJACK HORSEMAN, the Cold Brew Malt drink from Starbucks Reserve, and the electric fan we have in the living room that I’ve always found to be too loud and too cold/strong – now that the weather’s beginning to feel warm again, that fan’s been a damn blessing. What was the last reason for having butterflies in your stomach?
 Gab requested we video-call tonight because we haven’t seen each other in a while due to the virus outbreak – I hate hate hate video calls and never do them even with her, but because she asked and because she genuinely wanted to, I said yes. If you live with your parents, do you spend a lot of time with them? If you don’t, how often do you go home to visit them?
 I live with them. I don’t really spend time with them as I like having my own space. Having them under the same roof is enough for me. Do you need a lot of space in relationships, or are you happy to spend a lot of time with your SO?
 I can be pretty clingy so I tend to be the latter, but I’ll also want my space sometimes. What was the last thing you cooked from scratch? Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha Have you ever won anything from those games in arcades?
 We’ve hit the jackpot in some arcade games that awarded us the maximum number of tickets those games can give, but afaik we’ve never spent our saved points on big prizes. We just like to keep accumulating the points haha. When was the last time you went out to a fair?
 First day of February. Came back for my high school’s fair. How far is the nearest zoo or wildlife park from your house? Do you go often?
 I’d say the nearest ‘zoo’ is the eco-park in my school. It’s up a mountain but it’s a pretty quick drive, only takes about 15-20 minutes to get there. And nah dude, I haven’t been there since high school. What are you wearing at the moment? Is it for any particular reason? A tank and a pair of shorts. Do you have anything interesting planned over the next few days?
 Ugh no. This virus is making us stay home for THE NEXT MONTH. Hoping I don’t go crazy. What do you do when you can’t get to sleep?
 I watch something on YouTube or Netflix, or I browse Reddit. Super effective. Are you a morning person? Or does it take you a long time to wake up properly? Am a morning person. I was kinda forced to be ever since I was 4, considering I lived relatively far from my school which meant that the school bus always had to pick me up way earlier than the other kids. In the 14 years I spent in my alma mater I had to wake up at 5 AM every single day, which can easily explain why I’ve never been able to properly sleep in. How old is your oldest living relative?
 I’m pretty sure I still have a living paternal great-grandparent. Not sure about their age, though. Are either one of your parents retired? If not, what do they do for a living?
 My mom is a confidential secretary at a hotel. My dad is an executive sous chef. Do you buy a lot of DVD’s, or do you tend to just watch everything online for free?
 We used to buy DVDs; we had multiple racks back then. But time is obviously a-changing so I watch everything online now, either through Netflix or through sites that illegally stream movies haha. Could you happily spend the day in your pajamas? Or do you prefer to be out and about doing things?
 I’d rather be out and do stuff. Spending the day at home doing nothing can be pretty daunting and claustrophobic. When was the last time you were in a hospital, and what was the reason?
 2010, when I had to be admitted for a low platelet count. Does everyone in your household own their own computer? My mom and brother don’t have one. Do you find that your feet get unusually hot at night sometimes? No, this has never happened to me before.

[calm-me-down-oh]

How about all the questions ;)

skdsjf ofc u would get me back for that, under a readmore bc theres a lot!

When was the last time you masturbated? Yesterday! Had a.. very hot convo w my gf

Do you enjoy being fingered/fingering? Uhh the only time Ive had it done to me the person had to stop bc they got uncomfy with it and it was overall just a bit odd,, wait it happened a second time and their nails were too sharp also sdkfhsdh I feel like I could get to like it though? If its like, actually properly done rather than my current experiences sdhfk

How do you feel about food during sex? nno thanks mostly? I guess it can kinda depend on the food though idk, like if my gf suggested somethin I might not mind trying it out depending on what it was yknow

What do you do directly after sex? um.. well afaik just kinda lay/sit in a daze for a moment, mayb have some water, get real clingy, kind of have to be nudged into doing stuff bc i guess my brain just stops working skjdfkj

Cuddle with the tip in? Hell yeah. cuddle with it all in. sounds good.

What’s the nastiest sexual thing you’ve done? I don’t think I’ve really done anything nasty sdjkfsj all the sex ive had has been quite brief and vanilla idk

Name a follower you would fuck. @you-better-make-me!

Name a follower you have fucked. None..

What’s the sexiest part of your body? Idk man I guess my thighs are ok people seem to like them anyway

FuckMarryKill: DJ Khalid, Rick Ross, Fat Joe Am i supposed to know who these people are

Would you ever be with a trans person? i think the real question is would i ever be with a cis person (yes i would be with a trans person i am with 2 trans people and i am trans and i havent dated anyone cis since i was like 15)

Riding dick or doggy style? yes

Ever fucked in a school? Nope

Most random place you’ve had sex? havent really had sex in a random place lmao just beds

Would you ever be part of the mile high club? maybe..? thats having sex on a plane right. idk. maybe

Name three of your spots. what does this mean fkjd

Fuck on the first date? Depends

Do you suck dick? I’m sure gonna try!

Do you eat ass? Idk maybe not skdfjhsjk

Do you eat pussy? Haven’t yet, nearly did, got too nervous sdkjfh

Do you like kissing? So much!!

Is farting during sex sexy? I.. I mean its not sexy but like im also not gonna have a negative reaction. unless its me. that is something im admittedly very nervous about fkjd

Ever fucked in the shower? Nope

How old were you when you lost your virginity? Uh............ good question. 19 or 20 i forget if it was before my birthday but within the last year. unless you only count penetrative sex, then I haven’t yet

Do you prefer sex in the morning, afternoon, or night? Y..yes? I suppose afternoon/night is usually a better time, morning is jsut sleepy and trying to remember how to exist hours

Do you like drunk sex? Haven’t had it but I do get horny when I drink, wouldn’t be against trying it with someone I trust

Do you like high sex?  Again never had it! And I haven’t really been high either so Idk

FuckMarryKill: Nicki Minaj; Cardi B; Kash Doll N..none for any

When was your first kiss? I was like 13 I think

How did you meet the person you lost your virginity to? College

Have you ever faked an orgasm? Nope. Wait maybe. Kind of. Idk when I was younger I was with this guy who would try get me to touch myself n I hadn’t figured out how to make it feel good so I’d just lie and say I was when i wasnt bc i didnt wanna do it so maybe at some point i said i came when i hadnt sdfhks

Ever painted/been painted on? Yeah but not in like a horny way, my ex would paint on my hand as kinda their way of flirting with me

You like sex toys? Sure

What’s your favorite sex position? Personally think missionary is underrated bc that closeness and being able to cling just sounds v good but also getting fucked from behind face down ass up also sounds,, v good lately

Sex on a bed, couch, or floor? beddd, maybe couch, floor just seems uncomfortable

Do you like car sex? Never had it, just seems a bit awkward but I guess I’d be open to trying it

You get instantly horny; what happened? My neck got bit!

FuckMarryKill: Trey Songz, Chris Brown, August Alsina. Kill chris brown. idk who the others are

Describe your crush. Don’t have one!

Woukd you ever be with someone with an incurable STD? Uh... Idk? I mean, theres preventative measures for basically all std’s right? So as long as those are taken so i dont also get it I guess it’d be ok

Rate your head game. No clue dkfhdsj

Rate your sex. Awkward!

Would you fuck someone outside of your race? ?? yes. what kind of question is this

Describe the type of freak you are. idk what this means but what first came to mind was ‘pet’ so take that as u will

Ever tasted your own nut/cum? Sure

Into golden showers? Nope

Body count: Under or Over 25? Wayyy under

How do you feel about nipple play? Uh depends! Not into being harsh like clamps etc just seems like itd hurt n not in a good way, but playing w/ them w ur hands and sucking on them. very good

Where do you like to be nutted on? chest/stomach seems good

Which are you better at: topping or bottoming? bottoming

What do you consider “too small?” Idk man dick is dick idc

Is play fighting foreplay? It sure can be!

Do you like angry sex? In concept maybe, in reality itd just kinda scare me

How long should a quickie be? Idk.. quick

How long is “too long” to have sex? Idk sex ends whenever one of u wants to stop, don’t think u can go too long if ur both comfortable with it

How long is “too long” to go without sex? Listen i.. am not the person to be asking this I’ve had sex maybe 3 times spread out over almost a year. i have never regularly had sex

Is “no” relevant in a relationship? Incredibly relevant!! Always!! Unless you’ve discussed beforehand that its ok to ignore it and have a safeword in place instead!! and then that safeword is not to be ignored!!

Do you believe in no-strings-attached sex? Sure but idk if i could do it

Would you have sex in a public bathroom? mmmaybe....

Would you have sex in a changing room? mmmmmmmmaybe

Who was the last person you had sex with? My ex

Describe your type. Idk I have the weirdest type i think they have like nothing in common then theyll all turn around and be into the same stuff or something its v strange

Name 3 turn-ons. Biting, just making out sometimes tbh, skin contact in places usually covered by clothes or under clothes..

Name 3 turn-offs. Umm. i definitely have turn offs but whenever im asked my mind goes blank. I guess being overly rough, hair pulling im undecided on tbh, and oh i usually dont like having my ass smacked but idk if itd change if it were like.. in the middle of sex

Name something that would make you stop in the middle of sex. Bad pain or panicking or it seems like the other person is uncomfortable. or someones knocking on the door for some reason sdkfjs

Would you answer a phone call during sex? no omg

Would you ever pay for sex? Nah.

Would you accept money for sex? Uh. Maybe? Wouldnt ask for it tho

How do you typically feel after sex? Mostly affectionate and good, but w the last person i was with sometimes it seemed like they just wanted it over and done with so i would get kinda nervous and guilty over that,, idk

Do you like your body? Nah

Ever sent nudes? Yep

Have you ever cheated on someone? Yeah he was abusive

Have you ever been cheated on? Idk, maybe, wait i think the guy i cheated on tried saying he cheated on me too but idk if he was just trying to get back at me so

Would you have a threesome? If I trust the people sure

Would you have a foursome? Same as above

Would you take part in an orgy? Uhh idk maybe, same as above applies tho

Would you let’s train be ran on you? Again if I trust the people yeah sure

How often do you masturbate? Idk it really depends sometimes im really horny and its like daily maybe more than once a day and then sometimes i just dont for like. a while

Sex with the lights on or off? on.. how are u meant to see what ur doing otherwise sdjkhfs

Sex with music or tv in the background? Sure, idc really. Though i have a thing if its like.. kids stuff.........dont do that..........

Do you have a cousin you’d fuck if you weren’t related? wtf no

In your last relationships, rate the sex? Uhh... good? I mean, good at the time, though like i said sometimes felt a bit rushed, and that now makes sense and i have very mixed feelings on it but mostly guilt bc the person i was with has since said they werent really into it. so.

Do you sleep naked? Nah I at least have underwear on

How often do you go commando? Never

Are your nipples pierced? If not, would you get them pierced? Nope

Do you dive right into sex, or converse first? Uh, depends? Talking about it beforehand or even during can be good though. But i guess it doesnt have to be Right before it, it can be a bit in advance

After taking your clothes off, what’s the first move? Kiss.. touch,, etc,,

Do you make the first move? Um. w my ex i kinda had to bc as i said, i later found out they werent really into it. other than that i generally dont tho bc im very nervous abt all that, kinda especially after that discovery hdfbghf

Have you ever had sex with more than one person in a day? Nope

Do you like dryhumping ? Sure

Can you twerk or do a split on a dick? Probably not

Have you ever been recorded during sex? No but I’ve had a dream abt being recorded sucking someones dick it was weird

Do you watch porn during sex? W. who does that. how can u focus on that. why would u watch sex when ur having sex skdjfhsjdk

After fucking, do you try becoming friends with a one night stand? Never had a one night stand

What’s your kink? Praise! Marking! Collars!

Would you hook up with the same hook-up again? I don’t think i could have a hook up tbh so no

Ever made a relationship from a one night stand? nope

How romantic are you during sex? uh.. idk havent rly had chance to try being romantic during sex but soft sex sounds v good imo

Describe your sex in 5 words or less. in my experience so far? nervous and kinda awkward