#new pet ig!

[theonetrueyeet]

spider ramble... particularly about false widows

in a Mood™ abt spiders currently, ESPECIALLY false widows. been going back over my arachnid section of the invertebrate module bc i have exams soon and its late and im frustrated abt how false widows get portrayed by the media and percieved by the british public... this is gonna be long and rambly and probably not make much sense and go off in a million and one diff directions sorry i just feel like talking abt spiders. this also came about bc of the big fuckoff house spider that was in my room last night on the top of my door frame but since it was late (like. midnight) and also out of my reach i went eh. ill deal with it in the morning. and then i woke up in the morning and no more spider to deal with! which i should be more stressed about i feel but im so exhausted from the run up to exams and other life stuff that im just like ok cool thats Around somewhere now ig. im guessing it was a female from the size but i cant be sure... anyway without further ado onto the main show.

so here in the uk we arent exactly known for our venomous animals. we have some but they're nothing really that dangerous (to us as humans at least. im not going into venom-prey specificity rn ive had ENOUGH of that recently). we have the european adder (which is also percieved as terrifying bc its a venomous snake but it poses very little risk to us as humans bc they are very shy and i have a lot to say abt adders but thats for another day), wasps, bees, some venomous fish (didnt know this until i found one rockpooling they r pretty neat), even some stinging jellyfish and siphonophores like the portuguese man o war. and then we have the spiders. all species of spider are venomous (minus the uloboridae family, aka the cribellate orb weavers which im not too sure off the top of my head if we have those in the uk... we might have one or two species?? idk but they arent venomous and i think theres another family that has some non venomous spiders BUT THE POINT IM MAKING IS PRETTY MUCH ALL SPIDERS ARE VENOMOUS). there are 650ish spp of spider in the uk and of those VERY FEW are at all medically significant. of these few are the rabbit hutch spider, the cupboard spider, and... the noble false widow. these 3 spiders are all known as false widow spiders. we also occasionally get the meditterreanean false widow, but to my knowledge these only arrive on imports and dont have a population within the uk.

belonging to the genus steatoda, false widows are usually seen as these terrifying death spiders that will kill you just for looking at them when really... they arent actually that dangerous. most cases of bites being severe are either a) a result of an allergy or b) it was actually caused by something other than the bite itself (such as a bacterial infection in the bite, or the "bite" not actually being a bite) or even c) greatly exaggerated by the tabloids (shocker)... like ok we dont have many scary animals in the uk but. we dont need to overexaggerate the ones that really arent as bad as people think! badgers probably pose more of a threat to you than a false widow does. have you seen a badger?! they look so cute but they are VICIOUS those things will FUCK YOU UP and give you TB on top of getting absolutely mauled. a false widow will, at most, just make you feel a bit ill for a couple of days. me personally i would take a falsie over the badger. false widows also only bite in defense! most of the time they bite because you didn't see them and happened to be a very big thing up in their personal space! tbh i would bite too

false widow bites are, to most people, no more harmful than a wasp sting. so its not exactly a fun time but its not exactly the limb destroying death bite that the british media loves to make it out to be. most bites are probably dry bites or have near neglible amounts of venom, so won't cause anything more than a bit of pain. when venom does get involved it gets a bit more complicated bc it depends on how ur body reacts to it. as i said before, most ppl its not much worse than a wasp sting but it can cause things like muscle spasms, sweating, and a raised temperature. it rarely gets worse than that. of course you can be allergic to it which will cause anaphylaxis which is a medical emergency, but this is an exceptional circumstance. most ppl bitten by a false widow will not experience that. the panic over false widows in the uk is a mixture of media-driven mass hysteria and arachnophobia.

anyway in conclusion shoutout brandon collier who did an amazing talk abt false widows during the bhs venom day both at the 2022 and 2023 events both of which i was lucky enough to attend. if i cant go to venom day this year you will see me on the news.

[gaymothman]

finding out the human pet guy believes dinosaurs are a leftist conspiracy theory to cover up the existence of dragons was not how i expected to spend my morning but here i am nonetheless

[the-adventures-of-dave]

Every time I see a cat outside they surprise me with how stupid they are.

The other day I was driving home from a friend’s house. It was dark, around 11pm. I see a small pale creature sitting in the centre of the road and assume it is a hare. Hares always run out of the road long before I’m on top of them, so I don’t slow down too much (I’m only driving around 30km/h, anyways).

Turns out it wasn’t a hare, and did not run out of the road. I realize this once I’m nearly on top of it, and slam on the breaks. I almost run it over. The cat does not move. I have to get out of the car and shoo the cat off the road so I can continue driving.

If I was paying less attention or the cat was not white, I am 90% sure I would have actually run it over. It had zero fear of the road and full confidence that my car could not hurt it. I hear people all the time say their cats are street smart, but every time I run across a cat like that, I doubt those anecdotes a little more. Those cats aren’t smart, just lucky.

[loonavrsl]

240412 [News] Choerry opens Instagram account for her cat Rora (ro_rappo)

Translation by: litell_johnn

[inbetweenhours]

shitty post finale milo and Scott doodle from last night when I really should not have been awake lol.  Milo is a sappy and he needs to get as many of those new pet names rolling as possible. Mans got raised from the dead and immediately decided this was the first order of business and I love that for him.

[allgremlinart]

if DC keeps putting Ghostmaker in comics its a win and if DC drops Ghostmaker from comics completely its also a win ((I will just keep posting abt him anyway because I’m delusional and also now I can just make my own solo Ghostmaker run w/out them))

[spookyboywhump]

Apologies to my beloved blorbo for this one. I swear I love Jet I really do-

CW: Pet whump, mouth whump, tooth whump, this one is. More bloody than the last one.

***

He regretted the action as soon as he’d done it. She kept grabbing his face, roughly grabbing his jaw, digging her nails into his skin, he couldn’t take it any longer. He wasn’t even thinking when she reached for him again, and he snapped- literally, snapping and biting her hand.

She gasped, swearing and yanking her hand away, and he didn’t fight her, in fact he stared at her in horror, his heart sank as he realized what he had done. He knew he’d be punished for this, and when he saw the smallest drop of blood well up from where his teeth had broken her skin, he knew he’d be punished for it harshly.

“I’m sorry.” He blurted out immediately. “I’m sorry ma’am, I’m sorry, please- please forgive me, I’m sorry!” He begged, his heart pounding so hard his chest hurt. “I didn’t mean to, that- that was stupid, I don’t know why I did that, I-I was scared, I’m sorry.”

“Shut up!” She snapped at him, slapping him across the face. It stung, but he was almost relieved, he was used to being slapped around, he could handle that. “I don’t want to hear it! You will never do that again, do you understand me?” She said sternly, and he nodded.

“I won’t, I promise, I’ll be good, I swear!” He insisted. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to, I just- I just-“

“That’s enough.” She ordered him, and he shut his mouth, staring at the floor as he was too scared to even look at her directly. “You will be good, I’m only going to teach you this lesson once.” She told him, turning away from him. He already knew to expect punishment, he just didn’t know what to expect, and that made it even more terrifying. When he looked down, he realized his hands were shaking, he clenched his fists to try and ignore that, to try and hide it from her. He really felt stupid for it now, for thinking he could actually defend himself. He already knew he was stuck here, what good was it trying to fight back? She’d already made that clear, he wasn’t going anywhere unless she said so.

“Look at me, mutt.” She ordered, and he forced himself to look up. It seemed he wasn’t quick enough, as she roughly grabbed his jaw again, digging her fingers into his face until it hurt. “Open your mouth.” She said, he did as he was told, but it wasn’t until he’d done so that he saw the pliers she was holding in her other hand. His blood ran cold, his eyes widened and he instinctively tried to pull back but she just dug her nails into his skin. “Stay still, or I’ll strap you down and remove all your fucking teeth one by one.” He froze, he didn’t know if she meant it and he didn’t want to find out.

He would’ve begged her not to do this, to punish him any other way, but that already hadn’t gotten him anywhere, it seemed to only make her angrier. As she actually brought the pliers to his open mouth, he whimpered pathetically, scared half to death but even more scared to move and find out what she would do to him for it. He tried to blink away the tears welling up in his eyes, but he was unsuccessful, and he didn’t even have it in himself to care how pitiful he looked right now. The metal gripped one of his canine teeth, and he suddenly found it even harder to keep himself from crying, the anticipation almost felt like it was worse than the pain that was to come. That was, until she finally yanked on his tooth.

He didn’t know if he had bad teeth, or if she’d done this before to the point she could execute it expertly. Either way, his tooth was ripped from his mouth and he howled in pain as she briefly let go of his face. He immediately brought his hands up to cover his mouth, struggling to breathe through his nose. He couldn’t calm himself down, getting more and more panicked, especially when he pulled his hands away and saw the mess left behind. She discarded his tooth on the floor like it was nothing, looking down on him like he was just an annoyance to her, that cruel, uncaring look she gave him just upset him more.

“I-I’m suh-sorry…” He whined, desperate for any mercy she’d be willing to give, but he knew it was unlikely.

“Quiet. Open your mouth, there’s still one more.” She demanded, and he let out a broken sob, unable to hold it in as his body was wracked with fear. Still, he did as he was told, he squeezed his eyes shut, opened his mouth, and waited for the inevitable as she grabbed his face once again. His jaw ached, his mouth was filled with the metallic taste of his own blood, and as he felt the grip on his other tooth, he found he was silently praying she’d change her mind, that she’d decide that one was enough. He’d never prayed before, not that he could remember, but as she yanked on his tooth he was quickly made aware that nobody was listening, and nothing could help him. This one didn’t come out on the first try, he cried out in pain, clenching his fists so tightly his nails dug into the palms of his hands, but with the second harsh tug, she ripped that tooth free as well, leaving him sobbing hysterically on the floor, hands cupped over his mouth to try and muffle his cries.

She looked at him disdainfully, wiping her hand on the long black skirt she wore, disgusted by the mix of blood and saliva that had run down his chin when she still held him in place. He couldn’t bring himself to look at her, not when she was still so angry with him, and not when he’d risk seeing his own bloodied teeth on the floor next to him. He suddenly felt nauseous, he’d never been particularly squeamish when it came to blood but this was getting to be too much for him.

“You’re fucking pathetic.” She sneered at him, her words like another slap to the face after what she’d already done to him. “You act so tough yet you can’t even handle that? I think you’ll want to be careful from now on, I don’t want to have to do that again but if you give me a reason to then I absolutely will.” She warned him, but it was a lesson he didn’t need to learn twice, he’d never bite her again, he wouldn’t even think about it. He pulled his hands from his face, sniffling as he wiped them on his pants, disgusted with himself as he could only imagine what a mess he was.

“Y-yes ma’am…” He murmured, struggling to speak through the pain in his mouth. “I-I’ll be good…” He told her, and he hoped so badly she believed him, hoped she would trust him to be good and behave from now on.

He hoped he’d never have to experience something that horrible ever again.

[luxlitemidnight]

I've been mentally referring to myself as Wren (Wren was an online pseudonym) and uh oh my irl name is starting to feel a little alien i think i am on this hellsite too much (it's the hiding from reality)

[chaos-in-bright-pink-hair-dye]

Trick or treat!! 👻

*I reach into my bag for a little treat and place this in your palm:*

*it immediately scurries up your sleeve in fear*

Uh- sorry.. I have no idea how that got there...

[mazojo]

I think we, as a society, collectively, should ban kids movies from making fart jokes

[musicalghost413]

when the millennial tree arc peaks they better buff millenial tree cookie really well...

[unproduciblesmackdown]

remembering a fun marble hornets trans wrights element throwback where i managed to show up for one of their first convention features & while this was ofc already [serious "hmm...Not Cis: me??"] occasions i wasn't yet out or anything like well time to suffer being known & perceived thusly....while i Was out by the same occasion the next year like well here i am again, different name, binder, no plans to give anyone any rundown about this thing, hope it goes smoothly anyways and/or i'm effectively giving a reintroduction anyhow even though i May have been up to more memorable things that last time....no conversations needed to be had, i think i had the impression i was recalled as the same person but it was an entirely chill time, just this as like an early and pretty unique Occasion of like, here's people who know me from In Person (and ig Kind of online, i also don't recall ever like distinctly linking said in person appearance to onlineness lol. it just may also have not been an unsolveable mystery or a mystery at all. but mostly in person, and that's the element i was focusing on anyways) and my showing up transly in person with a whole other name this time as the major difference really lol. like well hope this goes swimmingly....And It Did. and at some point not eons later ya boy tim with some cringe comp sincerety like oh let me make this post somewhere about how an epic element of being a known internet creator is meeting new & various people including explicitly the [mh fans are like exclusively The Gays. and then some unfiction posters] factor & i'm like lol well you're welcome. just doing my part. but fr that was neat like i'm glad to get chill indirect & direct trans validation from internet horror series contributors in that immediate period of coming out & having to sweat it like damn wasn't at this point last time around

[c-nstellati-ns]

Lmao sorry.

You: Someone care to explain why we have 6 dogs in our apartment?

Esidisi: They're golden retrievers, dude. They retrieve gold. I did this for us.

i love the fact that he might be oblivious to the fact that these dogs are all fat and spoiled asf..... they are absolutely not fetching gold, at most they'll chase you around for a treat big man 💖💖

[lindawilliams-8]

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