#no on actually wants to hear about it ik but i dont stop telling them which im sure is really fucking annoying

[the-ark-awaits]

hm

[flor4de4amor]

hockey abby 🌀🌀🌀

oh i need her so bad. want her so bad. also ik nothingggg abt hockey so don't beat me up guys.

click for palestine | dont buy tlou | read b4 engaging w me

hockey!abby who's actually a sweetie. beast on the ice. monster of a coach and captain, but such a sweet girlfriend. she's always more than happy to see you out in the stands, wearing her large jersey, cheering her on.

hockey!abby who coaches little league hockey. she loves kids, but they're awful. and by awful, they're actually hilarious. she has to stifle laughter during practice and reprimand them, but once she's home with you she's telling you everything.

hockey!abby who's definitely got a light 'hockey accent.' she denies it with her life. she hasn't got an accent, its you who's got an accent! but you've got videos of her saying "sorry" like a filthy canadian. she swears on her life it's a deepfake video of her. how could you do that to your pretty baby? she trusted you. what's next, fake news of her losing a game? gosh, papparazzi these days.

hockey!abby who brings you out on the ice when she's the only one practicing. slipping skates on your feet carefully, and holding your hand softly. she'd race you but you'd totally lose, and she doesn't wanna hurt your feelings.

hockey!abby who's fights with the ref every chance she gets. she gets heated quick and easy. whenever she loses because of a stupid ref call, you never hear the end of it.

"that ref is a fucking asshole. why's she even a ref? i can do a better job than her." she rolled her eyes.

whenever she's pissed, its easier to butter her up and stroke her ego. "you would, but you're a much better player baby," you take her hand and kiss her pulse point. "besides, i'd miss watching you play on the ice."

she smiles to herself, "when you're right you're right babe." she agrees, humming.

hockey!abby who is always in the penalty box. always swearing off on the ice. she's one of the few female players who does start fights on the ice, and they are brutal. blood flying, helmets clashing, sticks thrashing. she always makes you kiss her bruises better, and you always oblige. smiling against each scab and scolding her when finished.

hockey!abby who is always ending up in tik tok edits and has the most obscene comments. it drives you mad, but it just confuses her. cause her entire page is a shrine of you and your realtionship. she does post herself here and again. gym selfies, post practice drill check ins, once or twice with her hair out. which everyone knows, is a real panty dropper. but they're totally innocent pictures! she's got her eyes on you and you only! she replies to vulgar comments with corny stuff like:

'im happily married!'

'my gf shook her head in disgust when she read this'

'plz stop trying to build a wedge btw me n my girl! our cats won't like this!'

hockey!abby who always goes to speaker events and is incredibly passionate about women in sports. she encourages young girls to get engaged as young as possible. she always wants to uplift morale and increase the amount of girl in sports, especially her sport.

hockey!abby oh hockey!abby.

[adams-angels]

Adam sfw/nsfw hcs? I love your work! Thanks!!

💖 Please send me requests! Send me your own headcanons! I will draw! I'm obsessed rn!💖

SFW

I'm gonna start off strong by saying socks and sandals. Thinks it's great.

Will stop listening when he's losing an argument. Stutters and minces up his words if he gets flustered or too aggravated.

Lute is his best friend

Says he has tons on friend but in reality lute is his only friend

This man thinks he's higher up in the food chain than he actually is. Which then leads to weak apologies from him

Doesn't go anywhere without his mask. Really big believer in that he doesn't like showing his face because both his wife's left him

Still absolutely bitter about that btw

Has an unhealthy coping mechanism when it comes to jealously.

For example, your an angel and some newbie starts talking with you and there's nothing really in it but he opens a portal to hell when your not looking and literally kicks the guy through it before closing the portal.

Or if your a sinner and you're telling him about someone who helped you the other day he will HUNT THEM DOWN next extermination day... If he can wait that long.

Likes getting you lil gifts, key chains, magnets, pins. He'll see a little thing and think that's perfect and wont hesitate buying it for you.

He won't give it to you though. He'll leave it somewhere obvious in his apartment for you to notice and go "oh, that's cute." For him to shrug and say "it's okay. You want it?" It took a while before you actually started accepting gifts this way

In public he will get you the biggest things. Giant teddy bear. New TV. A unicorn. But that's just to show everyone that he spoils you. That no one can treat you as well as him.

Loves lazy days

Also loves it when you preen his wings

Was the kinda guy that didn't have any kind of skin care until he met you and now you're both chilling with facemasks on.

Has panic attacks when he thinks you're going to leave him

When he's not wearing his mask he will not smile. It's really difficult to get him to smile or laugh when he's not wearing a mask.

But he's got the most beautiful smile

You managed you get him to laugh because you fell. What? He's still an asshole.

You couldn't be mad at him. He sounded so happy.

Has dumb pet names for everyone he's close to. Some are cute. Some are absolutely vulger. "Sweetness." "Babe." "Cutie" "cockwarmer." "Adam's dumpster." "Precious."

He's insecure AF baby

Loves hearing you say you love him

Will only tell you he loves you in private.

Would take a very special case for him to say it in public

If you get in a serious argument with him he'll run away in anger. He'll then come back after an hour or so begging you not to leave.

Sorry I really love pathetic Adam. fight me.

Smut below the cut! Minors dni

NSFW

Ik everyone says it's great at sex but I don't think he would be 🤷🏻‍♀️ not at the beginning anyway

I think he's a selfish lover and it takes someone he really cares about to make any changes

Would absolutely finish inside you then fall asleep soz babes

His cock is good tho. Likes it's a biggen. Length and width.

It was probably made to fit perfectly so

At least that's what he says

He won't believe it if you dont orgasm the first time you have sex with him. Everyone else has! Why wouldn't you?!

Well, Adam, they lied, sweetie.

Loves getting his cock sucked.

Asks for it constantly

If he gets in an argument with you he'll probably say "I'm sorry, it's just been so long since I got head."

He loves eating you out. Watching you squirm while his tongue is inside you really gets him going.

Likes you have you sat on his face so he can hold you down

He cried the first time he had sex with you after realising he loves you

Will beg to be loved when he's close to finishing. "Tell me you love me!"

Will get embarrassed after the fact

He was adamant he didn't like you. That you were just hot. But one day found himself jerking to the thought of you and that post nut clarity hit like a freight train.

Loves being praised ofc

Breeding kink. I mean come on. He was made to populate the earth. It was literally his job.

Loves rough sex, being in charge.

Will get possessive during sex

If he's having a bad day he'll be a lot more desperate and a hell of a lot more possessive

"mine" is his favourite word.

～⁠♡✧⁠｡ I really hope you enjoyed! I'm not a writer by any means but I appreciate any support I receive so thank you for reading! ｡✧⁠♡～⁠

[latibulater]

Venture Bros Rewatch notes: Home Insecurity

Fucking hilarious that Underland is designed like a disney princess villain lair but actually with all the executions.

tiger balm....tiger....bomb.....makes me laugh EVERY time honestly all i can think of when i hear tiger balm

Knowing that there are many kids with amputations in Underland from the child mines, like that is crazy the child amputee rate must be one of the highest in the world. i get that its played for jokes and it was funny, but if we are gonna be serious about all of it this counts and is like. mind boggling

whoo! use of the r slur! the way ive had to fucking campaign in my family to get them to stop using it and then i turn on this show and theyre saying it like every other episode makes me want to hunt down hammer and publick

okay but thats a waste of tiger.....

ik we dont learn this till later but i have questions about underland apparently being located right next to michigan.....PLEASSSSE LET ME SEE THE WORLD MAP IK ITS SO FUCKED UP

Brock's blue shirt is so beautiful on him...wish I could unbutton it off him. Dean and his hover boots, honestly those boots should make a come back

Stupid ass racist costume!

I literally choked on my spit and coughed at the same time Doc coughed at Brock's fumes

Okay I think Rusty is just doing a bit with the whole "big man think you can take me on? i knew this day would come" like seriously, the twins are so fucking silly but rusty is so beyond sarcastic he really is just projecting his own issues onto his kids all the time.

HELPER!!!!!!!!! Him going to take care of Rusty and so comically seeing NEW ROBOT blueprints and packing up a knapsack including a pic of child Rusty and Helper, oh my god it is just the sweetest robot and makes me wonder if there is a similar situation like with the red Helper happening with the whole....human brain.

the henchmen fighting and getting distracted till doc wakes up an slides into the panic room LOL

also i do love the underland footmen look as someone who loved tmnt it looks very foot clan

hank and dean may be a little over the top but they did take care of the scorpion and tarantula pretty handily.

Dean and Hank in the panic room and not even knowing when it was built....like seriously how many memories are they missing, consider they repeated being 15/16 over 10 times

Hank choking out Rusty is SO FUNNY Hank is just trying to help!!!!!!! just send them both to a first aid class you will be better for it doc

Rusty lactating!!!!! Milky king!!!!!

The animation and storyboard in this episode flips between dynamic and very getty stock images which is pretty funny

Dr. Girlfriend getting insulted and telling the monarch to use the phone himself...him trying to get an outside line....god i feel so old.

bigfoot baby!

"GUARDO" you fucking idiot Rusty. "I fell asleep" Okay but have we considered the fact  that you just don't have a head for mechanics and need to switch science majors

THE SNACKS FOR COMPANY. And Monarch apparently seeing the Baron for the first time since college and them trying to kill each other at first in a big dick measuring contest.

"how do you even mix it up! augh its like having my dad do the shopping!" ok i need more orphan jokes from the monarch stat seasons 1 he kills with this

its funny to see bigfoot and brock and steve summers meeting is so funny...considering that they all fuck when brock stays with them after he leaves the osi

"do you know how long 6 million bucks takes to pay back on a government salary!" fucking screammmmmmmmmmm

"lab partnership is a sacred trust" SSTILLLLLLLL want to know about how this happened

The Monarch fucking around struggling with his old ass computer makes me SOOOO nostalgic i remember we had a similar computer in the kitchen growing up.

Dean reading Helper perfectly and Doc going through a slumdog millionaire flashback before emotionally manipulating his mommy robot

One henchman became a hench after the plant closed and he only had a GED. one had a crack addiction and got off it. one (gary) got kidnapped) underland minions are drafted and then executed at 38.

"SASBURGER"!!! GOD "Sasquatch gave me a new life" Brock trying not be grossed out but like trying not to let it show (but only because he thinks Sasquatch is a woman at that point and he's bigoted but pro-str8 people always.

"Go team Helper!"

Jesus I really SSOOOOOOOOOOO would fucking fucking fucking kill for an expose episode on how henching works in the world as a job

all the army men are idiots very appropriate. brock getting SOOO weirded out. It is homophobic but also I choose to believe Brock has never seen a cock bigger than his own and got so horny and emasculated he got wigged out.

First mention of the Guild in this episode about filing paperwork on collaboration which i think is funny

Helper not letting Rusty out is SO funny me and my siblings would do that all the time. Truly, there is a lot to be said about Rusty and Helper's relationship. No other relationship has been as long for Rusty as Helper, who has been there sinvce he was a young boy and has always looked out for him.

Overall this episode is really fun and enjoyable, it does very well with having very silly concepts being treated seriously and then serious situations being treated clownishly. always love steve and sasquatch, altho the vbros design is so............he has a face only steve summers loves apparently. and the conversation on paying back the osi for the bionics was good worldbuilding/commentary on real world disability issues of how disability devices are often very expensive and only work at the behest of whoever made the device. my own cousin had a cochlear implant that worked very well but then he was told it was being recalled and he could get new one and now its works awfully for him

would rate this one like a 7/10. very solid but nothing too rib crackling funny or show pausing overly interesting

[choccy-milky]

Hi! I started reading your story sometime in the last week and I’m OBSESSED! I normally don’t have much patience and can’t get myself to read anything past like 15k or anything that’s still being worked on, but your story hooked me almost instantly! I really liked the description and decided to give it a try and I’m so glad I did. The detailed descriptions you give pull me into the story and the way you seamlessly switch points of view feels so natural. I just wanted to let you know how much I’m enjoying reading so far and I’m excited for more! ❤️

AW TYSM😭😭 this means a lot, esp since ive been kinda self conscious about the length of my fic lately (and also how long its gonna end up being once im actually done LMFAO) and ik my chapters have gotten ginormous BAHAHA so im glad that even if you don't usually read long stuff you still gave my fic a try and enjoyed it so much + are looking forward to more!!💖💖so ty again😭🙏 AND as usual i'll be using this to answer other asks:

thank you and AA im glad to hear it!! a lot of people have been telling me ive been inspiring them to draw lately and i love it (im just sorry i dont have any concrete tips to give people other than keep practicing LOL) but good luck and i hope you keep at it!!🥰🥰

GIRL IDK, IDEK HOW LONG THE STORY IS GONNA BE, but assuming im still brainrotted even when its done then YEAH u wouldnt be able to stop me if you tried😊 (im glad you like them so much as well, ty!!😭)

thank you!! and yes i usually have at least a vague idea of what i want in the story before i start, though a lot of it didn't become concrete until i started writing/things evolving from there. i made a big (slightly) vague timeline of the entire fic from beginning to (almost) end, and then i keep fleshing it out from there as the ideas keep coming to me/evolving, and for each chapter i make an even more detailed outline, and THEN i get started on the final chapter. so its a bit of a process bahaha, but the brainstorming is really fun!! as for any advice, im not sure. maybe just brainstorm/write down scenes and ideas that you know for a fact that you want to put in your fic, and then try to find a way to connect them to other scenes from there and work backwards. basically WRITE WHAT YOU WANT TO READ, cuz like im my own biggest fan fr, thats the most important part LMAO

LMFAO speaking of outlining future events.....this may or may not happen in the future/in an epilogue when clora is pregnant and she got those pregnant woman hormones that seb is fighting for his LIFE to keep up with HAHAHA

ive been drawing since i was 4 years old so...a while. LOL. and if you even look back to the beginning of my blog, my first drawings of seb were SO UGLY💀💀 so if you just keep drawing you constantly get better naturally (also in response to the other ask you sent as well, i use clip studio paint to draw!)

AW TYYY. AND YES CLORA WILL HAVE ANOTHER MC MOMENT, the ranrok confrontation is still coming, after all...👀👀 and true, idek who would win if clora and seb duelled again with neither of them holding back, but u are so right. even if clora DID win that would do nothing to change sebs mind about how protective he is LMFAO. THANK YOU AGAIN im glad you like my fic + drawings so much!!💖💖

BAHAHAH in my fic (for smut reasons and so that they could be 17 when they did the nasty) i made clora's bday april 3rd and sebs february 12, so clora is an aries and seb is an aquarius (and yes i just checked and apparently they ARE compatible, so seb can rest. also i just read up on aquarius and damn it unintentionally suits seb so well?? LOL "Aquarius is undoubtedly the most innovative, progressive, rebellious, and humanitarian. " and "They have incredible energy, though they may not always use it wisely. They find it easy to get through life on charm and good looks." LMFAO. ok king we love that

[sugar-omi]

Incoming ramble I wanna hear you’re thoughts on this cause it’s been on my brain for a little bit and it’s got me in my feels

K so I forget if it’s in the step 3 prologue or in the Drive moment but either way when on the topic of Cove leaving for Nevada every now and again and choosing how your MC feels about it there’s the option to choose that it makes you sad and nervous specifically because the little 8 year old in you (who remember was probably HORRENDOUSLY lonely) was scared that Cove was gonna leave and never come back

Now that option alone already gets to me (cause I relate to it hard cough cough) but just imagine the MC actually confessing to Cove about that fear!! Obviously the MC doesn’t want to make Cove stop going cause yknow he’s literally going to see his own mom but MC also can’t deny that there’s that sad lonely little kid inside their head who just doesn’t want to be left alone again so they’re kinda just stuck in the dilemma. But soon enough after feeling well enough to admit it they finally tell Cove about it and get to actually work it out!!!

It just- AUGH ITS GOT ME EMOTIONAL MAN I CANT-

cove would actually feel so relieved omg bc it makes him sad too and he misses you, ofc ik he says that no matter what but I think he also worries abt leaving n nevering coming back

very traumatized from the move after his mom n dad divorced n he tried to run away bc he missed krya, yk 😟

reassures you that he'll always come back, and that if that did happen he'd prbly try to run away to see you LOL

would offer to take you with him!!! if you're dating ofc you need to work it out w his mom a bit more than necessary but she wouldn't mind if you stayed over or came to hang out w them

I imagine krya spends a Lotta time at work anyway since she can't be on leave the entire time he visits, so she'd be relieved that he has someone to keep him conpany

he talks abt you so much anyway, it's like you're basically there w them already

if you can't or don't want to go with him, he'd video call you sm more

sends lots of pictures n texts and voice messages

tells you basically everything abt his day and sends gm and gn texts

NO VOICE MESSAGES

omg...

coves sleepy, raspy voice saying "good morning" (

sounds like this, would even call you sunshine like sonny did!!!😭😭

I'm falling apart

mmm if he's gone a long time he'd prbly even come see you, or meet you half way

which is stressful bc he has a long drive but he would bc he's crazy abt you

omg gives you a shirt of his.

BUYS MATCHING SHIRTS

omg and asks you what you're wearing every day until you say that shirt n he wears it like "omg!!! what a coincidence!!!!" babe we know u did it on purpose PLEASE

sends you flowers

n by send you flowers I mean asks his dad to pick up some flowers and deliver them to you

sends his dad money too but cliff would prbly pay for them once or twice bc he thinks this is so chge n send the money back to cove so cove is like "dad!!!" n just makes an order on his card bc his dad is so stubborn😭😭

cliff is actually in love w your guys relationship he's so happy,,, pls

I should write some hc's on how cliff feels abt you guys dating bc my man's is so happy!!!! pls. OK anyway

OMG YOU VIDEO CALL N EAT TOGETHER

will ask what you're eating n have the same thing if he can

OMG HE PICKS UP ONE TIME AND HE'S RUNNING ACROSS THE STREET N HES LIKE "WAIT DONT EAT YET I GOTTA PICK UP THE FOOD"

n you can just see his chin, the sky and then it's like kinda black n then for some reason u can see the floor and then he's like "sorry" and he starts running back to his car AGAIN

and so he delicately places the phone down n is panting n just goes, "sorry. I'm ready now" *throws his head back* "omg gimme a minute... man. climbing thru your window really came in handy"

KISSES THE SCREEN

big "mmmmwaahhh!!!"

or tiny "mweh", no in between

falling asleep on the phone too

WOULD TUCK THE PHONE IN.. OMG STOP IT

he's totally normal abt you I swear

[stray-tori]

link click s2e01+02 eng dub thoughts

waiting for my friends to wake up for new link click ep so i'm watching the dubbed episodes and ??? holy, the death flash segment has such a different vibe.

well not SO different but yknow... I do hope they didn't write themselves into a corner here...

Dub: "I'm sorry… everything is going to be different now. death isn't something even one of us can change. the best we can do is accept it, so please don't let this be another burden for you to carry." Sub: "It seems... everything is changing... If death cannot be avoided, then it might be better to face it now."

"don't let this become another burden" ???? ToT

Dub!LG was rly like "dude, speak faster- thERES SO MUCH MORE PAIN YOU CAN FIT IN HERE" dshjds-

Also I find the "even one of us can change" bit to be a little off-throwing. Maybe the emphasis is slightly wrong but I didn't process what he meant immediately upon first hearing it. Sounded more like "ONE of us" than "one of US" (i.e. ability).

alejandro's slight stutter when answering about the ability UGH GOLD

Little sad that the flow of red-eyes conversation isn't as good. usually the dub did great with convo flow, but here it seems a little jumpy. "if you dont know where to start, let's start with activation" -> "I can't quite figure it out" (then proceeds to explain how much they alr figured out adhsjds-)

Also the "i need to trust you again" depends heavily on the viewer knowing what red-eyes means there (i.e. the lie of no cops/the dark room plan).

ik that this is in the sub too, but the "but she sees right through you" is still a little weird to me and it's more obvious in dub i think. I thought that what this was going for was a sort of "you may be okay with fooling me, but fooling her (while i'm her) will end badly" kinda deal, but maybe I was wrong? In the dub it just directly sounds like they mean they were only able to tell the lie because they're in QL's body and get some of her memories and feelings (like CXS does, maybe?) - but they actively paid attention to his shaking hands and everything, so I kind of don't think they relied purely on QL.

nooo they keep making red-eyes slightly different. from them assuming the photos and then confirming it through the "does he run here or teleport" moment, instead they just try... to stab her?? i guess?? and then they go "ohh i get it now" which... isn't a huge difference but kind of takes away from their smart thinking.

Going from the reaction -> "oh so I was right! How interesting!" (sub) to -> "teleporting with pictures, talk about a convenient power!"

STOP!! REMOVING!! THEIR THOUGHT PROCESS >:(

"why would I wanna hurt lu guang? he's family to me!" dub out here confirming the marriage, good for them good for them why would they do this to me

"you said the girl is innocent" -> "from what we saw it wasn't the girl" WHAT ABOUT THE BLOOD ALL OVER HER MADE YOU CONCLUDE THAT

Changing the part where CXS calls the murderer "the person who calls themselves my friend" (paraphrased) was a good call, bc that... sure was A Move.

Damn, dub just implied CXS wanted to perma-dive via "Two years... that is more than enough time. i could go back and change everything.". afaik we still don't know if the 12h restriction is bc of lu guang's rules or actually a restriction, so that is... certainly A Move, too. In Sub I felt like it was just desperate and he might have tried even with the 12h windows, but here it rly does sound like he'd just dive for longer? Unless I'm reading the dialog wrong...

"Sorry to disappoint" LOL ICONIC, slight adjustment but based.

"what's with the stuffed animal? not for me, i guess?" LMAO HELP ME- "it's for my daughter, wise guy." PFFT

"and he's already a ghost. he doesn't even have social media. some might say he doesn't exist" o... okay? does dub know more than we do dshjds-

"Breathe, damn it!!" pfft Captain Xiao is trying-

"is he the streetfighter master siwen talked about?" DUB WHAT ARE YOU DOING- i'm p sure this is just about the style, not the person ahhh-

"our backup's gonna be here soon" - "how funny, mine just arrived" While not what I've seen people translate this line as, still a good flow for this moment.

Aight. Some stumbles imo, but maybe they know more than we do and it'll all work out!

[angiiepaniic]

hiii giving you an excuse to talk about your bill because i also like him a lot and know your pain about never being able to talk about him. so heres your divine excuse to ^-^ i wanna hear

AAAA YOU DONT KNOW WHAT YOU’VE DONE this will be VERY LONG and VERY RAMBLY so like u asked for this (thank u btw ur my first ask)

man idek where to like start :,D

(should note that this is mainly a modern rendition but sometimes i picture us in his world too so it goes either way, really :3)

if you want me to elaborate on anything then just lmk! (that goes for anyone who wants to)

OH OH ok so i’ve been REALLY getting into the band sleep token and there’s like 4 songs that remind me of him and as a result CANNOT stop listening to them (namely rain, give, mine, and telomeres - i highly recommend them!)

bill will listen to just about anything music wise but has a particular soft spot for things like blues, country, and some older rock like billy joel (also really likes soul and r&b like h.e.r. and muni long but will never admit it) — but generally, in his eyes, if it’s a good song it’s a good song, regardless of genre or artist.

he’s even more open with food, like, he will eat anything in front of him even if he doesn’t like it - just how he was raised. he doesn’t have any set favourites besides some southern classics (he will eat 25 servings of mac n cheese in one sitting if u let him)

i on the other hand am VERY iffy with food and find it hard to eat a lot of things, but we know each other so well now that bill will just eat off my plate sometimes (with consent ofc)

he’s not the best cook but is an absolute GRILL MASTER. all gang cookouts are held at his place (and pearson can’t decide if that’s insulting or not)

we spend like 90% of our time just relaxing together, but he does boxing on the weekends to (and i quote) ‘’stay strong for his lady’’

very protective, ABSOLUTELY the jealous type - not in a toxic way, just a bit grumpy sometimes (as always, this is bill we’re talking about)

he’s SO pleasant to be around. we have the same awful humour, the same love languages (we’re both so touch starved that we cling to each other like a curse)

he can be a bit a of a bastard with all the playful teasing but i do the same so it’s an even battleground. i can call him stupid and it’s fine, anyone else does and im THROWING HANDS (and so will he, probably) — and in turn, he’s the only one who can call ME stupid or HE will throw hands while i cry in the corner LMAO

the modern stuff doesn’t have very specific lore, just some cross-dimensional shenanigans. most of it is just based around my actual day-to-day and how i think we’d be living together — but i have a bunch of little aus! got a goth one, got a biker one (one of my personal faves), got a gender bend one because i’ll be damned if bill can’t ALSO be my girlfriend

when i imagine us in the red dead universe i refuse to let him have the bad ending he gets canonically - my funky little brain says that everyone’s healthy and happy in a little ranch or settlement somewhere because that’s what EVERYONE deserves (except micah)

i know most people view him as gay, but i personally headcanon him as pansexual and into everyone regardless of gender because I feel like that fits him quite well

he really is quite loveable, just sometimes he has trouble showing it - but he’s getting better. his ‘i love you’s come out as random hugs, random compliments, and endearing nicknames (as embarrassing as it is i imagine his go-to is calling me bunny :3)

we’re both kinda insecure so sometimes we have a back-and-forth but it’s compliments. i’ve been telling him every day that he’s wonderful and amazing and the best and that his belly’s one of my favourite things and i will DIE on that hill idc how much he complains.

ik that if he was reading the above paragraph he’d look at me and go ‘’BUT YOU COMPLAIN LIKE THAT TOO’’ and yk what he’s right - but that’s why we have each other

our relationship is very healing for the both of us. we both get the love we need and deserve after being deprived of it for so long, and genuinely we’re happier for it. i got out of a lot really bad habits thanks to him, and i’ve been doing my best to help him too <3

[weirdcat1213]

ok i have an oreo on one hand and a shark plushie on the other, lets do this

trimax volume 8 (pls dont hurt me)

thoughts

BUT BEFORE THAT, ACTUAL QUESTION: how are the 1st timers holding up? yall doing good?

ok now long post is here

chap 1:

-oh that title page its SO FUCKING GOOD

-MY BOI HES HERE

-oh hes not....doing it by choice.....oh

-legato looking like a pizza pocket is the comedy relief we all need tbh

-GET HIS ASS VASH GET HIS ASSSSS

-oh my geesus i heard that, i felt that shit

-"they abuse us" and here you are knives...doing the same shit

-OH THANK GOD YOURE HERE

-could you look less happy while doing this shit knives? pls?

-something something divine punishment from the skies, something something yeah ofc not anyone can do that shit

-oh hey why is he with them i actually forgot

-aw :3 i wonder who taught him to not shoot to kill :3

-also pls leave him alone hes not just a killer pls youre hurting my feelings-

-:c

-STOP VASH DONT LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT HOLY SHIT

-rem mention :c

-knives can you stop being right for a second, thanks

-the arm...wow

-OH YES ITS THIS MOMENT YES

-i dont remember what the other translation said but "that was the day we both lost our minds"....yeah im gonna sit with this one for a bit and cry cuz its true, they did

-oh yeah i didnt get this the 1st time lets try again :D

-ohhhhh....oh shit

-i hate siding with knives on this chapter but i cant help it. i also love the idea of being even

-also he looks so fucking cool while being evil, cool points for you knives

-"invasion" and it ends with him looking at the stars/nightsky? brilliant

chap 2:

-STOP BEING RIGHT KNIVES

-ALSO STOP DISTRACTING ME FROM WOLFWOOD TIME

-ah yes, the classic, sweetest, full of angst potential "i will remind of you of your home and how you dont belong there anymore" card, good to see you here

-oh god i forgot about this part, geesus

-ah crap i love this tho, gives you time to actually take in everything that knives is causing. its so easy to gloss over it with some quick panels but to actually take the time...i love it

-ok ik they get absorbed by knives but the idea of them flying away and being free (for a bit) is so pretty, im happy for them

-...geesus christ

-YES MY GIRLSSSSSSSSS :D

-it makes you wonder what they did to stay alive actually, like you never think of that stuff ig

chap 3:

-wait they didnt know???? hold up....yeah ig that makes sense but...hmmm

-YEAH YOU TELL THEM LUIDA >:D

-:c

-ALSO interesting how the borders didnt go black to represent a flashback, so maybe it wants to show how present is that memory in luida's mind. wow

-"maybe hes been waiting for us to come and help him" aaaand thats enough to make me tear up, im the weakest bitch on the planet let me tell you

-YES SEE LUIDA GETS IT

-GET WRECKED BY THE EXISTENCE OF GOOD PEOPLE ASSHOLE

-OH MAN HES BREAKING

-COOL ASS PANEL ALSO

-oh shit so he hit some plants oh shit oh damn

-AH SHIT

-omg she looks so epic while killing people <3

-THERE HE IS HERE WE GO YES GO GET YOUR HUSBAND

-oh look its the man in the tin can lmao

chap 4:

-KILL HIM WOLFWOOD KILL HIM

-HALF A YEAR???? damn i always forget, this is still going at the speed of light tho

-aw no :c my baby :c

-then again i like that you can see that even if it was just half a year (literally nothing for vash) it still caused him pain and suffering, 10/10

-GEESUS BRO HE JUST GOT FREE

-oh shit oh shit no

-im not really sure how he escaped legato but im glad :D also vash is longgggg i lvoe it :3

-well thats just depressing livio

-pls leave livio

-KILL HIM KILL HIMMMM

-ok but vash being basically a ragdoll rn while wolfwood is fighting and bleeding breaks my heart let me tell you

-wolfwood shut the hell up ok? shut up, i dont wanna hear it

-oh im going insane :) i hate wolfwood so much rn (his crime was to say sad things)

-OH IT WAS HERE I ACTUALLY FORGOT THIS WAS THE MOMENT AWWW HOLY SHIT MY BOY

-YES SAVE YOUR HUSBAND

-"youre not lost wolfwood" wolfwood saying all that shit outloud and IK FOR A FACT vash's heart almost broke ik it i feel it

-baby dont apologize :c

-............................................................ :c

-ah fuck hes here

-WAIT HOLY SHIT THAT LIKE SHADOW OF LIGHT???? AMAZING???

-oh oh im sick to my little stomach i fear oh geesus my boy, my baby, im so happy that wolfwood is all you need but also im so sad you dont have anything else, do i make sense?

-threatening you brother and begging him to not sacrifice himself in the same breath...knives the plant that you are

-woooooooooooooooooooooooooow i love that shit, hes so little...

-PLS GOD LET THIS BE IN STAMPEDE PLS PLS I WANT A SCENE WITH BOTH OF THEM IN THE SKY SO BAD PLSSSS

-im not entirely sure what is happening but damn thats nasty

-NO DONT FUCKING SAY THAT

chap 5:

-LMAO HIS FACE XD

-welp...this is terrible

-nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo :c

-oh righttttt, i forgot about that plan, so thats why people called him chapel

-oh that panel with livio thats fucking brutal geesus nightow. like the old livio seems so pure and far away while the current livio is so violent and present

-my god he looks like shit

-MARLONNNNNNNNNNNNN :D

-oh meryl my girl :'3 omg shes the best

-im so depressed rn :D

-idc if hes rotting, sadly the man looks majestic af

-ooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh oh ok

-NO DONT LEAVE PLS DONT FUCKING LEAVE PLS NO STAY STAY STAY STAY STAY STAY STAY STAY STAY

OH SHIT THIS IS FREE BIRD OH SHIT OH NO HELP HELPPPPPPPPPPPP

free bird time ig:

-freeeee biiiiird yeaah tururururururu

-wdym congratulations cmon man

-oh honey......

-awww :c

-oh wow now im DEPRESSED :D

-ugh that fucking face

-hes so cool sometimes >:D

-aw you made her cry :c

-"tired of filling a space in other peoples lives"....hmmmm

-aw :c

I hate whats coming i fucking swear.

[e77y]

relating to that vent, i getchu so bad. i feel like in general, the internet might worsen compulsions & obsession within ocd + etc. i have a similar feeling (wouldnt say identical cause i know u from tumblr n yaknow yaknow) that tells me everything i do needs to be 100% morally correct or [insert awful things] will happen to me or someone i love. and this is easier to deal with when you're offline, because there's a limit on the people that can get mad at you. half of the world won't get mad at you because only 0.00001% (or whatever) of the world knows you, yaknow. on the net, it feels like everyone who has an account knows you. your brain telly you anyone who has an account on here might see what you posted & they might be mad at you & they might make a callout post or whatever. even though they don't know you. which is a terrifying thought for many. i dont think youre alone in this, genuinely. and i feel it can be improved. some stuff that's helped me: - making separate accounts w private stuff (doesnt rly work on tumblr but like a private account on insta & etc etc) - rationalising thoughts (an example of this would be thinking: is it really likely many people will agree with someone being mad at me? or: how many people actually do see my posts? is that proportional to the amount of followers i have) - and talking ab it w friends. genuinely, the communication + processing of these thoughts & feelings is soo helpful. sending u soo much love <3 if u wanna chat a bit ab it you can dm me :) (ask can be published or responded 2 privately, whatever u prefer!)

Thank you so much for this message omg :’) ❤️❤️❤️❤️ So thoughtful. This made me tear up a little haha. I’m posting it here so I can look back at it later; hopefully that’s okay.

I’m really glad to hear other people feel the same way/have the same worry… like logically I know that it’s something a lot of people worry about, but idk; my brain has a way of convincing me I am the only person in the world who has done anything ‘bad’ ever LMAOO. So this was really nice to hear

Also I’m a very talkative person! Like I’m definitely an introvert, but I do like to talk about myself and my interests and my feelings etc. Especially when I have a forum (cough Tumblr) to post into the void 😭😭 So I guess that’s part of my issue; IRL, there are less people to be upset if I do/say something ‘bad’, and most of them are my close friends and know I don’t have bad intentions. But online, I walk on eggshells bc 1) strangers online DON’T know my intentions and 2) I just think my mutuals are really cool lol. So I don’t want to do/say anything ‘bad’ or even embarrassing in their presence yk? And online, their ‘presence’ comprises literally all the time w everything I post

I should probably make a more private account 😅 This one is kind of that (just bc it has far fewer followers than my other blog), and I have one on Instagram with like two people following it that I haven’t touched in a while, sooo maybe I will go back to that for more personal vents and whatnot 🫡 I try not to post anything TOO personal on Tumblr, anyway. I just also really like creating fan content, which sort of inherently puts me in a public space even if I don’t WANT to have an ‘audience’ (regardless of how small that audience is; ik there are people who look up to my writing, and that puts a lot of extra pressure on me, but I don’t want to stop writing, either…. Agh)

Idk this is probably overly personal and also very disjointed bc I just finished writing a 1,800 word essay and my brain is mush lol. I’m just sort of reiterating everything you said. Sorry for making you read all this lmao 😭🙏 But thank you for the kind words, seriously ❤️ I really really appreciate it :’D !!!!!!!

[totallysora]

Mean Girls Part 2 (Movie)

Ok so this is my overall opinions on stuff such as the cut songs and the actors etc 😭 (Once again I haven’t actually watched it, I’ve only ever listened to the soundtrack [once 💀] and seen a few clips!)

Let me start with cut songs! It roars (yes I am counting this) - Realistically I don’t really see why they cut it, and honestly I imagine it would’ve fit within the movie better Also, Ik Renee was on broadway as Regina, and Ik she can sing/write, but never let this girl pick up a pen like ever again that song sas horrific 😭 There’s definitely worst songs out there don’t get me wrong but this was absolutely not a good replacement for it roars Where do you belong? - Ok honestly cutting this makes sense, I can see how this would be difficult to translate from the stage, and they’re so theatre that making them pop would be horrible 😭 doesn’t mean I’m not upset abt it tho 😕 Meet the Plastics (also counting this) - Literally what was the point man 😭 if you’re gonna get rid of all of the best parts get rid of the whole song like this was utter bs - sure, I haven’t seen if it worked well in the movie but Idc, there was literally no need 💀 The reprises (all of them excluding someone gets hurt) - I guess I see why they cut these, as the movie would’ve just been made a lot longer with them, kinda wish we could’ve heard aaron sing tho Fearless - Kinda sad they cut this cuz I actually rlly like the song 😕 also completely butchering gretchen and her songs like damn 😨 not yall acting like she’s one of the best singers on that soundtrack 💀Stop - Much like where do you belong, I can actually understand why they cut this one, although I absolutely wanna hear Jaquel sing it (and on his live the other day I’m pretty sure he said he’s planning on releasing a cover) also doesn’t mean I’m gonna be happy abt it tho 😔 WHOSE HOUSE IS THIS - THIS WHOLE SOUNTRACK IS LITERALLY KEVIN G ERASURE BRO 😭 LIKE WDYM WE DONT GET TO HEAR HIM RAP?? YALL R GONNA TELL ME THAT THE ENTIRE PARTY WAS JUST SPOKEN ☹️ More is better - Also kinda like this song, once again wish we could’ve heard aaron sing but it is what it is Ig 🤷‍♀️ Someone gets hurt (reprise) - Ok so this wasn’t in the soundtrack, and seeing clips of it I see why 💀 It was barely even singing?? She was legit just yelling/screaming it was so bad 😨 DO THIS THING - AS I SAID BEFORE KEVIN G ERASURE LIKE THERE IS NO WAY THEY HAD THE MATHLETES CHAMPIONSHIP WITHOUT SINGING 😭

About the actors

Don’t Quote me on this but am pretty sure only 2 of them are actually theatre actors?? Ik both Jaquel and Renee have been on Broadway but before the movie cast was announced I had no clue who the others were? And I tried to find theatre credits but there were literally none 😭

I saw a clip the other day of Tina Fey telling us all to stop complaining abt it, cuz she got a killer cast, and sure yea they were a good cast but if you’re gonna make a musical movie, especially based on such an iconic musical, actually make it a good musical?? Actually whilst I’m on this topic I just wanna say the advertising for this movie was so shit, like they didn’t even advertise it as a musical?? And so many people went without knowing it was 💀

Tbh although I’m not trying to say the cast was bad, I just wish they casted actual broadway actors, cuz it would’ve been sm better (for example, WSS 2021 - most of the cast were bway/theatre actors n it is one of the best musical movies I have ever watched)

At this point I would’ve preferred the og bway cast 💀 Like Idc that they’re all 30 or whatever 😭 Personally, I prefer proshots to movie musicals anyways, due to the fact that we get to see it on stage, so ee don’t have to miss anything, and if they really wanted to do this properly they should’ve just gone for a proshot 🤷‍♀️ But that’s just my opinion based on what I’ve seen!

[nyaarr]

Hi, i just wanted to say quickly that im rlly inspired by your WFI series on ao3, so much so i wrote my own fics (id love for u too have a tiny look at them🙏). I just think it's really good, even though the ending left me crying a little😭 I wondered if youre going to do any more Anahardt stuff at all? I understand youve slowed down since ow isnt for you anymore, and thats totally understandable. I just had a few questions;

-Were there any ideas you had (old and new) for fics, or headcanons or stuff that never made it into an actual post/fic? If so what were they, id love to know

-Ik u said WFI part 3 wouldnt come out, but i was thinking if i could write it for you instead? As in, you tell me about your ideas you had for it, and why it never took off, and perhaps i could write it myself? sort of like a little reboot. if not its totally fine👌im not offended.

But yk, if you ever get any ideas of picking the hammer back up, dont hesitate to let me know. love ur work btw, super awesome!

Hii!

First of all, thank you! You're very kind :) I would love to read your stories, and surely other people here too, so hit us with the link.

Blizzard killed the love I had for Overwatch. Not for the characters, you know, but the game itself. They destroyed WoW first, then came for OW, and I'm pissed. I'm so pissed I uninstalled both months ago and grieved what we could have had.

I have a short anahardt story almost finished. :< It's another "they get together" type of story. I really enjoy watching them get close I guess :3

I also have another big story that I'll never finish: an OW + Pacific Rim crossover that was going to be about Rein and Ana. It's actually two stories, because I never could decide which plot I liked most, so... I kind of wrote both in paralell :_) I might actually post the first chapter as standalone one of these days.

I had a million ideas for WFI3 and 4, some of which were written down in different grades of completioness. Since I dropped the project quite some time ago, I only really remember that I put on paper.

WFI3 was going to be a mashup of short stories happening on different years instead of longer chapters. I wanted to cover around 20 years or so, and this seemed the best way forward. It was going to start from where WFI2 ended, kind of fix things so that they were in friendly terms again but strictly nothing more, and end it with Rein's retirement and Ana's death.

WFI4 was going to be more similar to 1 and 2, and was going to show what Rein and Ana were doing on their own before their met again.

One of the ideas I wanted to explore for Rein --which might have never worked, but anyway-- was having a big discussion with Jack about what happened with Ana at OW headquarters, and then snatching his armour on the way out and becoming a sort of a fugitive (an idea I got from Ironhardt). This was going to be a bit in line about what Sombra said about Brigitte not knowing stuff about Rein's retiremnt. He would be in hiding but helping people until the fall of OW, where the UN would stop actively looking for him. Then Brigitte would join him after he comes to the Lindholm's house looking like what the cat brought : )

They were to go here and there and answer the recall on Gibraltar. Torb and Bastion were going to be there, just like Jack and Ana (with their masks on), Tracer, Winston, and others, and everything was going to go to hell pretty quickly from there.

I envisioned Bastion and Rein's encounter a bit more dramatic that what Blizzard showed us. Blizzard always hinted at Rein having some sort of trouble with his memory and whatnots, which I was going to address at the end of WFI3 (the reason for it) and in WFI4 (where sometimes he thinks he sees and hears things, like a rogue bastion ticking or Ana's ghost -- which happen to be very real).

WFI4 would have some of the ideas of the Anahardt 2018 stories I wrote as well. Particularly the conversation they have where Ana explains what happened to her and why she did what she did-- with the difference Rein wouldn't have caved this time. I wanted Ana to work hard this time to get him back. He deserved it lol.

I wanted WFI4 Ana to be different in quite some aspects, after everything that happened to her. She wasn't going to know which memories she had were real. So in a way, Rein would understand what she was going through. And I wanted Brigitte to be fiercely protective of him, hissing at Ana, so to speak, and telling her to stay away.

I'm all happy that you find inspiration on my stories and that they make you write. If you want to continue what I started, go for it. I won't share my drafts or ideas in more detail, since whatever you write has to be your story, not mine, but the universe is out there so to speak. Go ham. Have fun. And share when you're done!

I'll give you a little parting gift though. The first bit of WFI3:

Sep 2056 -- Sweden

“Yes, I am sure.” Torbjorn rolled his eye, his patience obviously running thin. “It’ll be fine. Aha. Yeah, we have the SUV he borrowed from HQ. Ah, what now?”

There was a moment of silence so poignant that Reinhardt looked at his friend. He was glaring at the coffee table as if he wanted to disintegrate it, but then his gaze softened. 

“That’d be fine, I think. Thanks. Talk to you soon.”

He hung up with a flick of his wrist and leaned back on the bunch of pillows they were sharing in front of the TV.

“So…? What happened?” 

“Dr Shollner seems positive that you’d recover sooner since this time the rest of your leg is not in pieces.”

“That’s a relief!”

“He will perform the surgery in two days, back at the base.”

Reinhardt swallowed. That was not the plan. He was supposed to fly to Sweden, fix his leg in the hospital where Angela’s parents used to work. The whole point was not going back to Switzerland yet.

“I know, I know,” Torbjorn sighed, closing his eye and resting his hand over his midsection. “I tried, but it wasn’t negotiable. The good news is you’ll be back home with us the next day.” 

One night of being on bad drugs. He could manage that.   

“The better news is I’m going with you. So you better behave; I need my beauty sleep.”

“What? No. You need to rest. There’s no need to—I’ve got this.”

“Shut up. I said I’m going, and I’m going,” he snorted softly. “I can do some designing from home, but I’d rather bring some of my equipment here.”

“Designing?”

“For my arm,” he waved his hand, lazily. “And for your armour. No point in having surgery now if the armour is not helping you enough.”

Reinhardt shifted in the pillows. He was not sure how much of his plight was his armour, and how much was just wear and tear. However, he would take armour improvements with grabby hands. 

“And…” He started after a moment of silence, after noticing his friend was still frowning at whatever he learned over the phone. “Can you make it so that I could jump ah, let’s say, down from a building? Like taking a big plunge.”

“No! You should not be jumping off buildings. Wasn't last time more than enough?" The engineer glowered. "What’s gotten into you?”

“Ah, I was thinking it would be really cool if I could be deployed directly from the aircraft. You know, just dropping to the groooound, and boom!”

Torbjorn turned his head towards him, an indescribable expression on his face.

“No more brännvin for you. Or sugar.”

“Aww…"

[poofy-pile]

Okay so like. I met this guy in my friend's bus right I had to go by her bus once that's where I saw him right. He has these stupid little interests and knows too many stupid gore and horror stories which are actually so yucky but he was telling them with such excitement and with hand motions and all and it was SOOO cute this silly guy should get all the good friends. I never thought about him much bec well this was last year of me at this new school anyways (thank you pandemic) and its ending soon quite literally after boards we're out. So I didn't even know him before that and it is saddening bec i wish i could be his friend. He probably doesnt even know me even now considering he's a humanities student and well I'm in science we're long apart lets leave it at that. No really his class is on the other end of the corridor and well there's nothing that could've happened anyways I had already stopped all relationship factors after 10th bec of A) sour past heartbreaks. I couldn't get my heart to undergo more for now. and B) for competitives (you know how it is considering you gave JEE (if I'm not wrong) too?). See he's not even a friend ok. I dont even know him same for him at me. The only little fucked up thing he's said acc to me was ''I wanna try every drug ever bec that's life I wanna die an experienced man'' quote unquoted.

Now see initially (6 months ago?) it was a squish and later I forgot about him but I saw him with my friend again the other day and he still looked just as cute just he was a little serious that day though but the curly hair big pretty smile were still as cute and i couldn't get the sight of him telling stories from the bus day out of my head right. So I just talked to my friend somehow and got out of there just wanting so somehow fade him out sjhsjshdjs bec lets face it Nothing Is Possible even friendship sadly at this point bec we already have like 3 exam days left on school and other than that he's nowhere near me or my circle to even befriend and I'm already a very shy person so augh its. Sad. I really however would've loved to be his friend. Tbh i dont know about other feelings right now but the friend crush is so strong. I would've loved to have this dork as a friend maybe. I would've loved to hear him rave about his stupid silly little gore stories. I would've made a fake disgust face and covered my admiration for him I would've LOVED to hear his stories and maybe ruffle those curly hair while he was at it. sorry if this sounds too cliché. But like he's cute and I dont want anything tbh this is just flitty feelings and they'll get out I know but. I just wish he finds a girl or guy who listens to all his stories with full puppy eyes and i wish he gets a partener or even friend who tells him how cute his smile is and how they love when his eyes sparkle up when he tells a story with so much excitement. I wish he just knows he's so silly and cute and it's so nice we got him in this world and i wish he knows its so beautiful he exists i dont know how else to phrase this augh. Ok farewell now and good luck for your exams!

i'm crying it's so sweet 😭😭 i know it's scary but i do think it's worth it to try to befriend him like ik it's nerve-wracking but if you ever could. sometimes you just have to take that leap of faith. maybe that person could you, bestie.

[kllrorca]

TLDR;

- Hai!!!! I'm Orca also now known as Mylo (bc the name is pretty and i wanna feel pretty :3) I'm an alter who's LITERALLY our host but I also have some fictionkins I'll need to regulate later on umm!!!!

- I age with the body and rn, we are 17 :3 I DON'T HAVE A DNI (beside the basic one!!) I'm just existing ^_^ I USE THEY/THEM!!!!!!!!

- I CAN'T FOLLOW BACK!! This is a side blog and even tho host doesn't use tumblr to post, ik he wouldn't want any proshippers in his following so I'm gna respect that :3 (feel free to follow me anywhere else that DOESN'T connect this type of stuff)

- I AM A PROSHIPPER AND PROFIC(??! I need to search more about it but it seems fun :3)

Tsdr [Too short didn't read];

ITS ME!!! - KllrOrca :3

— Mylo/Orca ; Minor ; They/Them ; Headmate

- SIDE BLOG. Other socials will be put later!

- I'm usually fronting, if I'm not fronting u have the permission to ask about me!! The host might not respond but sooner or later I will instead :3

- I am a proshipper & Profic, I'm still getting used to being public about it so I'll put emojis down at some point!!!

- We are bodily Black & Puerto Rican :3 I WILL make jokes eluding to racism and slavery with friends, its something I picked up and will NOT let go!!! If that makes u uncomfortable just tell me ^_^

— Activity Varies depending on how much people perceive me ^_^ If you dont perceive me I won't be on for long, since I'll be bored!

- I USE MY HOSTS ARTSTYLE THAT SEEMS EASY TO USE!! I don't want to hurt my hands OR make others think my host is a proshipper when he's not 😞 I wanna get in drama for ME not him srry

- Everyone has full permission to draw my sona and use my sona in anything EVEN hate drawings :3 I love everything!!!! Give it to meee ^q^

— I'M NOT EXACTLY AGENDER BUT I DON'T EXACTLY HAVE A GENDER EITHER!! I guess I AM agender but on a more feminine + masculine side without the neutral ??? I don't really care :3

- My sexuality is... idk!! I haven't thought about it

- I AM APART OF THE LGBT THOUFH!! I KNOW THAT :3 Idk if I'm pan, i don't think so and besides; I wanna be myself !!!

- ANY AGE CAN INTERACT WITH ME BUT DON'T BLAME ME FOR ANYTHING I AGE RESTRICTED!!

— HAI thw main blog to get to any OTHER blog IS strictly [ANTI PROSHIPPERS] + variations, so I can't send it here :3 incase any anti proshippers want it to date back to my host (who rlly just wants me to stop bothering him about everything) then dm me and I'll send it!!! idm ^w^

- I'll make a carrd/rentry/strawpage at some point :3 maybe :3 idk .. maybe I shouldn't but also Should once I have all my socials ready

MY BOUNDARIES [IK, SHOCKING!!]

— I don't have a dni (beside the basic one!!) :3 You can interact with me idc! Even if its for arguing! One thing I ask though is that u DON'T attempt to dox me, bc at the end of the day I can just stop fronting snd you'll be doxxing an innocent person instead who got so tired of hearing me yap and yap!!

- I won't be doing the time, my host will :3 and it'll only traumatize us more!!! Don't be stupid :D

- ACTUALLY don't harass ANYBODY!!!! u can Harass ME but don't harass anyone else PLEASE!!!! I won't like talking to u otherwise sorry

— JUST BECAUSE I'M AN ALTER DOES NOT MEAN I WANT TO TALK ABOUT MY SYSTEM! Talk to me for me pls :3

- I DON'T CARE ABOUT SYSCOURSE UR ALL PEOPLE AT THE END OF THE DAY and I want people to talk to me ^_^ Talk to me Rachel...!! /ref

- IF YOU feel uncomfortable talking to me since im an alter (confusing but wtvr) DON'T FEEL FORCED TO INTERACT if I interact first :3

- Ai generators can kiss my ass also btw I don't like Ai but i can like the person typing the prompt in the computer if ur cool !!!!

MYYYY Final notes :3

— ANY ANON EMOJIS ARE WELCOMED TO ASK FOR A SPOT HERE OR A SPECIAL TAG :3 U can dm me and ask me abt things idm!! I have the mindset of NOT SENDING HARASSMENT OR hating on people who haven't done anything :3

- u can request me art from me :3 but know thay sending nsfw to minors IS illegal so I can't do nsfw!! sexual nsfw!

[thisplacecanburn]

Im really sorry for a long message but we haven't been friends for years and I dont know how else to reach out. I just want you to know I am sorry for how things turned out between us. I never meant to hurt you or any of our mutual friends (I guess for me, ex friend). I know you're probably going to send this to some group chat and you'll all laugh about how lame I am for trying to reach out. The truth is I went through a lot in life very suddenly (and ik everyone does, its not an excuse) and I'm sorry you all had to see the ugliest parts of it. you guys are my roman empire and im sorry life made it hard for me to be the friend you needed. I honestly needed intense support in that time and its okay if you couldnt be that. Im not sure if you care but I genuinely had to go through everything I went through completely alone. You guys were my closest friends and my main support system at the time. I'm sorry if my behavior at the time harmed you in any way shape or form. I know I may not have been a good friend while I was going through things in life, but I never really mentally recovered from being ghosted and excluded by you two. I don't mean to be bitter but I've been afraid to make new friends for years because of the way you guys treated me. I see you reblog posts about feeling lonely and disconnected from others at times and I wonder if you ever realize how much of an impact you've had on other people's lives. I wish there was an easy way for you guys to tell me you were starting to secretly hate me but we were young. I wish we trusted each other enough to actually talk about it. I guess if you hate having me around it's not worth fixing. I just want you to know Im sorry and i know I made mistakes being your friend. Its been 7 years since we stopped being close, 7 years is how long we were friends before that. The anniversary effect is real and I think I've moved on but then I still find myself wondering about how you're doing. I hope you stay friends with the people you actually love and I hope they love you back. I hope you find people who will give you more chances than you gave me. I was hoping to be one of those people cheering you on but you don't want me to be there. And I think Ive finally accepted that. Im not sure if you care, but in case you do: I'm doing okay now so no need to worry about me. Again I am so sorry this got so long and is probably intense and scary to receive with no warning. I have needed to say this to you and I know it's a lot. It seems counterproductive to be this detailed on anon but it feels embarrassing to reach out any other way. You can block me on IG if it bothers you that I'm following you on there. There's no need to respond or reach out if you don't want to. I just don't know if I'll ever get the chance to tell you this. I'll probably never see or hear from you again. And I'm tired of being hurt by that fact. They always said if you love something, let it go. I loved our friendship so much. You were the coolest girl in school. You taught me a lot about life at such a young age. I'm so sad we don't share our lives with each other anymore, but thank you for the time that you did. Thank you for the times you tried to help me. You were someone I really genuinely cared about. I'm sorry if I didn't show it enough. I always admired how brave, sensitive, and intelligent you are. We were girls together. Now you are a beautiful woman and you are going to shine in life.

Thank you for reaching out please message me. I was a mean girl and a bitch to people that needed me for a long time, no one deserved how I treated them I have no excuses. I am full of regret and I miss girlhood and friendships I’ve lost due to nothing more then my own insecurities. The really shitty part is realizing I could have done this to more then one person and can’t even reach out myself. Thank you for being brave and kind and telling me it means a lot to be even thought of.

Please be kind to yourself I am glad you’re okay I hope you find nothing but joy and peace, I understand. Growing up is just so fucking hard

[funkylittledemon]

autism and emotions is so.... well it fucking sucks is what it is. i need my mind to slow down for a second to get all these thoughts down bc i will explode if i dont get them out there (hence why this post - only bee is gonna see this & knows me enough to be worried for more than an hour or so and if i put this where nobody can see it aint actually out there) (wassup bee dw i am okay)

anyway

i say that life is just getting to me rn and it is but thats too vague a statement. current affairs (an impartial term but a useful one here) are getting to me - I'm trying to navigate adulthood while it feels like the life i was promised is being taken away by whatever event you want to pick; global warming, late-stage capitalism, multiple genocides, the list goes on. and I'm one of the lucky ones!! how fucked up is that! so there's that constant stress hanging above my head.

then there's more abstract life: navigating uni and living alone and looking after myself while forming relationships and starting to try carve a path for myself. this one isn't as bad but still can't be ignored and the fact that interpersonal relationships have become so scrutinised through social media doesn't help. no matter the insecurity you have or your own specific factors there will be someone online telling you your worst fears are right - i cant say how many times ive scrolled past a reel saying that i havent had a message back because "he" doesn't care. does the person saying this even know I've seen it, let alone who i am or who "he" is? No!! but the sentiment sticks with you despite only seeing it for 3 seconds before scrolling on, despite logically knowing it can't apply to me because its a catch-all statement to everyone who feels insecure pushed onto us by an algorithm that thinks we want to hear that. social media is feeding into our fears and insecurities and we can't stop it. as an autistic person whos insecure as fuck and who knows they dont understand a lot of societal cues being told by some random person that im right to be insecure really doesn't help - i get the idea of something stuck in my head and bc i know its bs i try get it out which cements it further into my mind and lends it credence.

then there's uni itself - i am now faced with the realisation that everything leading me up to uni and my course has been about me helping other people, often to my own detriment. i chose a counselling course because i was always the therapist friend, the one who everyone else went to for help. and wouldn't you know it I've been burnt out for years and literally don't have it in me to help strangers, or give a shit about their lives. i cared so much and made my entire life about helping other people that i had no idea what i wanted to do. im switching to just psychology now, because it is interesting and i do enjoy it but im kind of lost now i dont have that purpose. it also scares me just how much of my life hadn't been about me at all and im still not sure who i am if im not helping someone. obviously thats the dramatic version but you get the gist. uni's been a wakeup call i wasn't prepared for and theres the work and exams on top of that

christ this is long. okay. what else was there. emotions. god i hate emotions. this is the hard bit. all my emotions are so so big and i am so so small and it feels like they would devour me whole if they could. anxiety is a big one. recently pretty much all ive been feeling is anxiety - a deep anxiety that makes me nauseous pretty much 24/7. last week on friday i had what i call a breakdown. i still dont understand it (which is scary enough - every other breakdown i can disect and point to the cause). i just sarted screaming in the middle of the street and couldn't stop and its making me anxious just typing this up. then there was a day of panic attack after panic attack (lost count after the 4th i think) and then a few days later and some bad decisions (booze. ik i shouldn't have drank but i thought i was ok to drink) i had another breakdown. i dont remember much of this one but it ended in me being locked out and sobbing - security had to let me in and it must've been bad bc the guy gave me a card with hotlines on it. (again, i am okay). i lost my leather jacket that night which both sucks bc i loved that jacket and also the fact that it's gone is a constant reminder of something im ashamed of. after that it was just this constant nauseating anxiety, occasionally spiralling into something more but not significant enough to include. the thing about me and emotions is that my strategy for dealing with them is to ignore and repress them until they're not my problem anymore. which is bad. but idk how to cope with them healthily and when i feel okay i never know if its because i repressed them again or because i genuinely feel okay. being around other people helps but thats probably not a great thing - i hide my emotions from other people to avoid being a burden. not that its always a bad thing that my friends make me feel better its just not a sustainable approach to constantly avoid being alone. i have this constant struggle of feeling emotions so intensely then feeling shame because of how intensely i felt those emotions or how they made me act.

going on from emotions fucking me over and moving on from Life being an issue anxiety is a fucking bitch. all my life I've felt like an outsider and so constantly nervous about everything. it was hell and then in 6th form i made friends who were so so confident and i finally started to relax a little bit more and not feel bad about taking up space. uni was even better! i had flatmates i loved and i was going out doing things I'd never dreamed of and i was making friends!! i barely recognised myself and i loved it!! then the breakdown happened and i was plunged headfirst back into the old cycle of anxiety and going back to that after feeling what life could be like? that was worse than the breakdown. it feels like ive never felt worse and the knowledge that theres no reason for it, that nothing had actually changed other than me and i could still be out there with confidence but i wasn't was such a crushing feeling it felt like i was never gonna feel okay again. dramatic i know but the truth.

im home for easter break now and typing this out has helped and going back to my old stomping grounds has shown me i have still changed and i do still have the confidence even if i couldn't access it for a hot min. I'm still anxious but thats okay. my emotions don't have an all poweful spell over me and anxiety can suck my dick. there's still the fear that I'll go back to uni and it'll all come rushing back however im just gonna see how this break goes. im gonna be alone whether i like it or not while im down here and if i can manage to be okay with that then I'll be fine. and i do have a support system both here and up at university.