#not between sam and dean

[destiel-wings]

Dean Winchester & hug dynamic analysis

I was thinking about how whenever Dean hugs someone he's almost always the one hugging the other and how this links to his psychological trauma of always being the caretaker of people, making himself bigger to protect them.

Because that's how Dean sees himself, as a shield for others, and then I thought about how Cas actually is the shield, and he's HIS SHIELD, specifically, the only one who's really there to protect HIM, which is why it hits so much when we see this:

The way Cas wraps his arms around him, trying to protect him with his whole body--that he'd use as a shield and give up in a second if he could spare him from any pain and save him.

(for context: Dean was about to go use the soul bomb on Amara there, it was a suicide mission)

Bobby is another one that hits, he hugs him as the big hugger because he's his father, he loves him and he's actually here to protect him (and Dean LETS him -barely, but he lets him *and Cas* - in a way that he doesn't let Sam)

I watched a compilation of Sam & Dean hugs to check if i was right about it, but it's almost always Dean the big hugger with Sam, except when he's about to die or Sam sees him alive again after losing him.

Even then, Dean mostly tries to hug Sam as the big hugger anyway, with at least one arm, like a way to comfort him, making him feel protected, like his body language is saying "I'm here, I'm okay, I'm still strong, i can still protect you" (because their real father failed and Dean thinks it's his job).

He rarely lets himself be the little one hugged with Sam, unless he's barely conscious. Which is why it kills me so much more now that in this moment (s14, when Dean was going to lock himself in the Ma'lak box cause he was possessed by Michael) and Sam has a desperate breakdown and punches him (to stop him) he forcefully hugs him as the little hugger, the way Dean always kept him, like a way of saying "I still need you to protect me, please don't do this to yourself".

In the scene below he gives Sam his blessing to do a dangerous (possibly suicidal) mission, and one of his arms is down, but the other one tries to stay up--he's forcing himself to do it and he struggles because he still wants to protect him, but (as the seasons progress) he slowly becomes more prone to let go.

So in this view the hug dynamic becomes an indicator of how Dean sees Sam (and himself) and his protector role, how adult and self sufficient he considers Sam, and how much he lets people around him take care of him, lowering his walls and letting himself be hugged.

This is also why i think hugs from characters like Garth or Charlie are so special, because they're just like us: they see Dean and they just know that he needs to be hugged a lot, and that he's not used to it, so they just go for it-- and it's so normal and kind and spontaneous that Dean's just not used to it-- he doesn't know how to respond (especially with Garth, at the beginning, but as the seasons progress, he learns to, and he even initiates the hug eventually).

I love the hugs where they're 50/50 (one arm up, one arm down both), feels like they're equals, both taking care of each other. I feel like with Sam and Dean, this indicates a healthier dynamic, because Dean lets go a little of the role that was imposed to him and manages to see Sam as the strong individual that he is. But the same applies to 50/50 hugs with other characters, like with Cas, where I feel like it testifies how equals they feel in terms of being fighters, there's a show of respect of each other's strength that transpires by the gesture (which is even more astounding considering that Cas is literally a powerful angel).

And just to end on a destiel note, I'd like to note the possessiveness and protectiveness of Dean (rightfully so) whenever he finds Cas after he thought he had lost him, and how that translates into his body/hug language:

[alaynestone]

you're an angel, i'm a dog or you're a dog and i'm your man you believe me like a god i destroy you like i am

[castielsprostate]

only thing that matters actually

[lambmotifz]

they were having violent sex here

[jamevaa]

Yes, Sammy, because proper terminology is the main issue in this whole conversation.

[incesthemes]

there is interesting johndean subtext and insinuations across kripke era, usually through an antagonist insinuating parent-child sexual violence in order to exert dominance over dean. this type of mockery exploits that ambiguous relationship between john and dean and reminds dean that he never had a normal relationship with his father, and that makes him gross and wrong. it doesn't actually matter in the end whether john was sexually abusive to dean. the core of their relationship was damning enough: dean was made to take the place of john's wife—to comfort john and raise sam—while simultaneously being his son. the codependent nature of their relationship implies the incest that underscores their dynamic. again, this is regardless of what literally occurred between dean and john because there is enough doubt toward the nature of their relationship that multiple antagonists can use it against them.

sonwife, brotherhusband—dean is stuck in a liminal space between family and lover and is unable to put his feet firmly on just one side and instead has to accept both together or abandon both together. he doesn't get to have a relationship with his family without it being simultaneously incestuous. he plays the role of wife to john and mother to sam as mary's replacement; he therefore becomes more than a son and transcends the boundaries of the familial into the incestuous. it's baked into the dynamic and he can't hope to escape the liminality in which he's stuck without abandoning his entire family altogether.

this ambiguous relationship is further acted out with sam, where people perceive them as lovers rather than brothers; where their mutual devotion trumps, neglects, and disallows any other close relationship outside each other; where their physical closeness is viewed through an unusually sexual lens despite no literal sex acts between them taking place on screen. once again dean is stuck in a liminal space, paralleling the ambiguous and uncertain relationship he had with john.

in the end, sex (and sexual violence) is just a symbol of this codependency and uncertainly incestuous dynamic. sex acts in kripke era end up being symbolic: misinterpretations of sam and dean's relationship; accusations of sexual violence; literal, on-screen sexual moments between the brothers and someone else. it's a literary device that highlights the incestuous themes of the show. dean hand-picks women for sam to fuck because it allows dean to be symbolically part of sam's sex life. henricksen accuses john of raping dean because it is a symbol of the unhealthy, codependent relationship dean had with his father. the samulet stays on during sex because sam is symbolically integral to dean's sexual gratification (seen too in the way both dean and cassie in 1.13 appear to kiss the amulet at least once in the dark room). sex is used to signify more than what's literally on the screen, and the connections between the literal sex acts and the blurred lines of dean's familial relationships allow for a reading of incest between both john and dean and sam and dean.

it never mattered whether johndean or samdean had a sexual relationship in the canon because that was never the point. the point is the liminality that permeates the narrative. sam, dean, and john all stand upon a threshold between acceptable and taboo. the point of it all is the doubt and anxiety, the are-they-aren't-they that is never answered. the absence of incest within the text invites the understanding that the incest was, in fact, always there.

[jayjay-thejet-plane]

SAVE A HORSE, RIDE A WINCHESTER🤠

Extra sketches below cut :D

Dean helping sam apply his lipstick😗 and the sam sketch plus a couple scribble deans~

(hopefully i’ll finish the lipstick one i quite like it)

[finalgirlsamwinchester]

1.01, "Pilot" | Stephen Adly Guirgis, "The Last Days Of Judas Iscariot" " | 5.22, "Swan Song"

[icamehereformidam]

So Dean is fucked up but Sam is insane. So.

[winchestergifs]

STACKEDNATURAL ⇉ 113/327

10.6 Ask Jeeves Written by Eric Charmelo & Nicole Snyder Directed by John MacCarthy Original Air Date: November 18, 2014

[bloodydeanwinchester]

✨2x02 || Everybody Loves a Clown✨

taglist 1 (let me know if you’d like to be added or removed!)

@castielsupernatural @passengerseatcas @demolitiondean @quiet-doll @angelsdean @universalcas @faithcastiel @millicentmarva @fountaincas @deanbroco @waldrea @thigholstercas @castielfucks @youre-only-gay-once @girldaddean @verypissedoffdee @redleavesinthewind @cascigarette @naughtystiel @achillestiel @faithdeans @annaslittlebiitch @castiellesbian @obsessionofspn @my-people-skillls-are-rusty @hauntedpearl @colonel--sarge @latinocas @babygirlstiel @blue-eyed-cutiepatootie @flowernerdcastiel @srazten @cockworkangels @birdstiel @shallowseeker @arsonistsam @nvybloo @f-rgetregret @saintedcastiel @oughilovehim @loyalbloggerwhowaits @mrcowboydeanwinchester @cannabiscasgate @deangraham @icarusalchemist @riverwithoutbanks @rainsongdean @nelsonsmynickname @dakrapatops @vegancas

[shadystranger]

You hang up

No you hang up first

Hehehe

Hehehe

[tongjingnian]

Tbh it's quite reasonable that Dean & Sam didn't even notice incest is wrong (or still don't)

yeah they know generally incest is wrong, but I mean, I keep noticing about the way Dean try to FLIRTING with Jo and steal kisses from her and then at some point he said he sees Jo as SISTER??

which can lead to the concept of siblings in Dean head (and maybe Sam's too) are allowed to do flirting, kissing, and making love with, and that is not incest 🤔🤔🤔🤔

and I strongly agree with the stories in some wee fics where Dean and Sam didn't realize there was a problem, and John and Bobby were dumbfounded and couldn't change their opinion even they tried really hard then finally gave up 😋

Just, yummy 🤭

[shinelikethunder]

i've seen plenty of talk in SPN fandom about missing s1-3 Dean and honestly i feel it too - it's hard not to - but do you ever think about both Sam and Dean feeling the same sometimes. about them haunted by a grief they can't admit to for that sweet, brash, dumbass kid who sold his soul for his brother and whose body is still rotting at the bottom of an unquiet grave with his guts ripped out.

about Dean knowing damn well what it'll sound like if he ever admits to missing that kid who could never have done the things he's done, and who finally died for good in hell when even that was tortured out of him.

about Sam knowing damn well what his grief for that kid once drove him to do, even (especially) when he was right there next to - and a total mess about how to deal with - the Dean who came back wrong.

they both know better than to talk about it. but sometimes it haunts them, all the same.

[lambmotifz]

thinking about how the original plan (had the writers strike not taken place) was for sam to use his powers and save dean from his deal & castiel wasn’t even supposed to be in the show because eric kripke did not intend to include angels…

[piersthesniper]

I don’t got much, but its the brothers in their cowboy costumes/outfits :)