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#nothing like loving you dev
solosikoasgf · 1 year
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nariah perry - nothing like loving you (a solo sikoa fic) + character insight.
nariah 'riah' perry is a content associate for wwe - starting off creating content for the nxt brand before recently being promoted main roster content due to increased demand and need for coverage. riah is best described by her teammates as creative and a slight workaholic - she's a perfectionist and is usually in deep dives to see what content will work best + what's on trend. has been known to spend hours sorting through video coverage to make edits for social medias, and has become relatively close with certain main roster stars (usually former nxt graduates) due to her creative direction despite being a rookie. she has no affiliation with the bloodline - in fact she's under pretty strict instructions to steer clear of them as they are handled by a more senior staff member for content. however, chance encounters has her face to face with current enforcer solo sikoa - and it's strange how all of a sudden, her life is always intertwined with his. key personality traits: outgoing, tomboy-ish, workaholic, curious, affectionate, stubborn likes: warm summers on the beach, a cute bikini, her daily starbucks run (brown sugar shaken espresso, extra brown sugar syrup), coconuts, a good slickback bun/ponytail, pasta, a fresh nail set dislikes: soreness after a workout, long wait times, clear phone cases, people who are uncaring & crass, overly aggressive behavior, hairless cats, chihuahuas
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blueskittlesart · 21 days
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*sigh* thoughts on Nintendo's botw/totk timeline shenanigans and tomfoolery?
tbh. my maybe-unpopular opinion is that the timeline is only important when a game's place on the timeline seriously informs the way their narrative progresses. the problem is that before botw we almost NEVER got games where it didn't matter. it matters for skyward sword because it's the beginning, and it matters for tp/ww/alttp (and their respective sequels) because the choices the hero of time makes explicitly inform the narrative of those games in one way or another. it matters which timeline we're in for those games because these cycles we're seeing are close enough to oot's cycle that they're still feeling the effects of his choices. botw, however, takes place at minimum 10 thousand years after oot, so its place on the timeline actually functionally means nothing. botw is completely divorced from the hero of time & his story, so what he does is a nonissue in the context of botw link and zelda's story. thus, which timeline botw happens in is a nonissue. honestly I kind of liked the idea that it happened in all of them. i think there's a cool idea of inevitability that can be played with there. but the point is that the timeline exists to enhance and fill in the lore of games that need it, and botw/totk don't really need it because the devs finally realized they could make a game without the hero of time in it.
#i really do have a love-hate relationship with this timeline#because it's FASCINATING lore. genuinely. and i think it carries over the themes of certain games REALLY well#but i also think it's indicative of a trend in loz's writing that has REALLY annoyed me for a long time#which is this intense need to cling to oot#and on a certain level i get it. that was your most successful game probably ever. and it was an AMAZING game.#and i think there's definitely some corporate profit maximization tied up in this too--oot was an insane commercial success therefore you'r#not allowed to make new games we need you to just remake oot forever and ever#and that really annoys me because it makes certain games feel disjointed at best and barely-coherent at worst.#i think the best zelda games on the market are the ones where the devs were allowed to really push what they were working with#oot. majora. botw. hell i'd even put minish cap in there#these are games that don't quite follow what was the standard zelda gameplay at their time of release. they were experimental in some way#whether that be with graphics or puzzle mechanics or open-world or the gameplay premise in its entirety. there's something NEW there#and because the devs of those games were given that level of freedom the gameplay really enforces the narrative. everything feels complete#and designed to work together. as opposed to gameplay that feels disjointed or fights against story beats. you know??#so I think that the willingness to allow botw and totk to exist independently from the timeline is good at the very least from a developmen#standpoint because it implies a willingness to. stop making shitty oot remakes and let developers do something interesting.#and yes i do very much fear that the next 20 years of zelda will be shitty BOTW remakes now#in which botw link appears and undergoes the most insane character assassination youve ever seen in your life#but im trying to be optimistic here. if botw/totk can exist outside the timeline then we may no longer be stuck in the remake death loop#and i'm taking eow as a good sign (so far) that we're out of the death loop!! because that game looks NOTHING like botw or oot.#fingers crossed!!#anyway sorry for the game dev rant but tldr timeline good except when it's bad#asks#zelda analysis
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dontkissmenat3am · 3 months
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Tbh i dont understand the way some ppl are acting completely hopeless about dinos hiatus
When dino said they were going on hiatus, everyone was like "yes ofc dino we'll be waiting take ur time 🥰🥰" but now thats it been like two years some ppl are like "omgg wheres dino 😭😭 chapter 5 is never coming out"
What did you guys think when dino said they were going on a "longer break from game dev"? Like 5 months?
They said they are focusing on their education and that they need a basic source of financial support. In this perspective, 2 years is basically nothing, extremely reasonable if anything.
Also they themselves said that the online expectation of constantly working on games had started to make them question if it consumed their life, and that they were under a lot of pressure trying to make chapter 4 in as short amount of time as possible. And yet people are pressuring them again?
Like i want chapter 5 as much as the next fan but dino is one person
They also said that they do not want to have chapter 4 as the last chapter, that they hope to return in the future to continue and that they never intended to give up game dev so i dont understand why people think its never coming out. Its been 2 years not 10 lol
And even then it is their decision
Btw I've seen some ppl also say that maybe we should make/write chapter 5 and 6 ourselves instead, which, though i dont agree with the "canon is discontinued forever!!!" thing, i do think its a decent idea to try to predict what might be the rest of the story based on what we already know and then in the future see how much we got right or not. I think that would be neat
I just dont like some's attitude shift
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lotus-queer · 1 month
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Everyone so mad about Five and Lila, meanwhile I'm standing over the grave of Klaus's S4 plot asking "Why? Why would you do this to him?"
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moiraimyths · 1 month
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Before we call anon rude because let’s see it from their perspective, imagine getting an entire feast to eat. That can be pretty hard to start with so much that’s going on, but if they start with one thing they know they’ll like (aka one character they like) that can be the start for them leaping to other characters to finish the story and the bigger story. I struggle the same way to start book series if I don’t have at least one character that drives me to read it, it’s all about what can be the hook to push them through. Sounds like the anon is neurodivergent (just a guess) so they might genuinely not see it as rude and see it as a solution to even play the game to start with.
Btw absolutely adore the game, the complex and rich characters making them all so unique is amazing. The art is so pleasing to the eyes I love it!! I’m waiting for it all to get out at once so I don’t get too impatient. Shae however interests me the most, which routes will have the most lore for them? Will there be routes that give more lore in general based on decisions you make or do they all share the same amount? (I mean general lore not just Shae lore)
Apologies; we are not trying to accuse any asker of being rude! We are simply explaining our perspective as the developers / are trying to broadly encourage folks to dip their toes into other areas of the story outside of the main route(s) they're interested in, especially considering some routes will be made available sooner than others, and these other routes will likely contain additional scenes/lore of everyone's fave(s) regardless! We want to give each main cast member an equal amount of love (and lore) regardless of their overall popularity, so our goal is not to tut-tut anyone for having strong preferences for one character over the others, but rather to explain that you may be surprised by how much *more* you learn about your preferred characters in the other routes. That's all!
For Shae... Well, they were a foot soldier for one of the worst periods of the War. Lore wise, any other story that touches on the War will likely have content relevant to them and their experiences. ^^
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#ask#clotho answers#edit/final note: we got a *few* asks on this subject and will not likely answer all of them for the sake of our followers' dashboards#but we also want to note that part of our encouragements here come from the fact that Flan/Keagan are our most popular characters by a lot#and we want to do what we can to gently nudge folks who may not want to romance the fem / nb characters into checking out their stories#despite not being into them romantically. this is half of why we have platonic routes to begin with#we recognize veterans to the dating sim world may feel less inclined to romance characters that don't align with their irl orientations#this isn't a bad thing. some people steer clear of dating sims altogether because they're aro or just not interested in romance stories etc#but the unintentional side effect of this is it has a chilling effect on developers even in the indie sphere to make less diverse stories#if Flan and Keagan are our most popular characters then they will be our most *profitable* characters in the long run#and as much as we would love to not care about money and just produce the story we want to tell#we live in a society (tm) and need to eat#if at the end of ndm's development we see that 90% of our engagement went toward the boys it is hard to ignore the financial incentive#to redirect our energy toward leaning into the 'tried and true' formula that assures we can buy groceries and make rent#basically what i am candidly saying here is capitalism is pretty bad for creative liberty unless you're already rich / able to self finance#which we are not. and currently none of the core devs make *anything* from ndm#it would be nice if it does turn a profit but that isn't a guarantee - which the team has accepted as a normal risk in game development#anyway this is getting rambly but the Point is that this goes beyond us wanting to make sure all sides of our story are equally appreciated#it is *partly* that - we do want players to experience the entirety of our artwork#but it's not just for our egos - it's so we can keep making art like this#i considered including this in the body of the post but money talk suuucks man#and i don't want anyone to think we're glaring at them in a holier than thou 'ah-ha! you don't want to play maeve's route because she's a#woman!' sort of way because i think that's a reductive way to look at things#people like what they like and there's nothing intrinsically wrong with that#but if you like that we're making a diverse story#with masc routes fem routes and nb routes#even if you don't personally want to romance x or y#it would help us if y'all play the platonic routes#we are trying our very very best to make the fem/nb routes interesting for Everyone so those stories don't get sidelined#and if you don't like them for their own sake - fair enough! can't win em all and we'll deeply appreciate that you tried anyway!
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duckyfann9871 · 3 months
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Drunk me concurs: i am in fact in love with Ginoza and would move mountains for him
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todayisafridaynight · 11 months
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So Allegedly Infinite Wealth is 100 hours... not that you can't already spend that long on the games if you really want to, but I'd say it's the first time that could be said to be the base experience rather than a time only hardcore completionists are likely to get.
Yokoyama was talking at length about wanting to make the game worth the price tag since the team is incredibly conscious about the value of the players' time and money. They essentially feel they owe players ten times what they paid, so they're aiming for "an enjoyable 100 hours, but also an unforgettable 100 hours."
If they pull it off, I personally think it'd be 100% worth it and not just a "well other studios are doing it so we can get away with it too" price hike... I'm at least happy to know that's not the intent, and I'm intrigued to see how everything pans out and what the ratio is between story and side content
oh yayaya i saw that article this morning!!! 100 hours is actually so unfathomable to me in terms of an rgg game- i mean y7 was At Minimum around 45~50 hours but when i think of other RPGS that easily dip into 70's and 100's of hours, i'm not too surprised to see LAD start to climb towards those numbers now. it'd be such a jump in rgg's terms tho, so i'm TRULY curious to see where the nearly doubled gameplay hours comes from..
i really appreciate yoko's respect not just to RGGS but also to its customers: they want to make a great product, but they also don't want to sacrifice what they want to do to do that in the process
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daecaerys · 5 months
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META , 𝑫𝑨𝑬𝑵𝑬𝑹𝒀𝑺' 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑨𝑵𝑻𝑰-𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑷𝑯𝑬𝑻, 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑨𝑵𝑻𝑰-𝑴𝑬𝑺𝑺𝑰𝑨𝑯, 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑯𝑼𝑴𝑨𝑵 𝑸𝑼𝑬𝑬𝑵: often talking with @ruingod and the tropes around characters, i realized how of an antithesis dany is to the common messianic trope ( unlike paul who absorbs himself in it to gain power ) and since recently there has been going on a discussion about it as if she's the same trope as his ( sigh ), i decided to come here and express my opinions ( which are just that, opinions and interpretations ). well, daenerys does not see herself as anything but a queen, a ruler, and she views it as a duty and not a priviledge. she sees ruling ad a responsability to protect those around her ( coming from the sense that she often wasn't protected ), and does not use their dependance on her and their views of her figure as means to create prophercies or even propaganda about her rule. she never sees herself as above her people, as their savior, but a member of their reality/society with the power of bringing change. daenerys did not conquer the free cities to gain numbers to battle, or to rule them with her iron first of ideals ( in fact, one of her issues is that she did not count with that part and is falling under creating her own ruling ). daenerys conquered the cities to free the slaved and their oppression. she had no need to do it either, with enough gold and ships to sail to westeros before doing so.
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there's no questioning that daenerys is doing what she does because she believes in the good, not in vengeance, not out of need for power. she's there to serve the oppressed, and not the opposite. she's not their messiah. there's a reason why mhysa resonates with her: she's mother, she's freeing, amidst the fear of being the opposite due to her roots ( remember the valyrians were slavers themselves ). like dragons, there's no cruel inner nature. there's the singular thing: dany is good. intrisically. she struggles in understandig that good intentions do not make a good realm - it only, sometimes, makes it weak. and to be ruthless to protect those she swore to protect is what makes her shake in fear of becoming entirelly ruthless. losing herself. becoming what people believe dragons to be: monsters, and monsters only.
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daenerys does not use speech to gain support. her actions did so, and she did not do them out of the selfish reason: yes, this will have me be their queen. i'll become their god. no, dany did it because she loathed to see such suffering. she acted out of her heart. when she freed the unsullied she did not do it knowing they would follow her afterwards, nor when she fred drogo's slaves. their freedom was theirs, just like hers was hers. they followed her because they saw it as just that, someone worth it, someone who did it because it was right, and not someone who used them.
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her iron throne goal becomes secondary in her mind as she decides to stay in mereen to keep things under control. to not let those people back in chains and in even more pain before she met them. if she wanted just to control them, dany would become the tyrant that season 8 wants you to see her as. she'd burn her enemies, and make others follow her with the disguise of being their savior. make them cross the sea and fight in her name only. she'd be flawless before their eyes, she'd see herself as flawless, she'd see herself as righteous. daenerys does not do it, in any moment. she constantly does what sacrifice is needed to help others and not herself. staying in mereen is proof of that, still, we constantly read she's a selfish person who only does what she does out of greed. when speaking of paul, for example, and the parallels, it is just a mirror of different perspectives of similar situations. one leaning towards the opressed for power, and the other leaning towards power to help the opressed.
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nevalizona · 7 days
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Johnny fans that can't accept that he enjoys being a part of the family AND killing are so funny to me... like, why are you even claiming to like him? You don't seem to like the most basic parts about him lmao...
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duskholland · 1 year
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i’m the jokey baby
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jewishbarbies · 3 months
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Wyll’s romance IS boring but it has nothing to do with his skin color. Larian dropped the fucking ball with his character at all possible angles. he could’ve easily been an instant favorite without having to guilt people into liking him because they apparently could only add (1) black character, but they chose not to give him the same well rounded arc and romance as some of the other characters, and that’s infinitely more racist than just finding his romance storyline boring. don’t blame players for Larian’s fuck up.
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nexus-nebulae · 2 years
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whenever i see hollow knight theorists talk about the grubs i almost never see anyone mention certain things that i always think about so i'm just gonna infodump and see if these theories make any sense? I'm going to be such a nerd about taxonomy and real-life bugs. also note that i haven't genuinely studied this shit in school, i am running purely on wikipedia and Autism™
First things first: they're grubs. They're larvae. They're not finished growing, and as we see from the charm they give, they metamorphose into some form of flying being. It's not clear what, but if the Elegy charm in any way resembles what a Grubberfly actually looks like, then they would seem to have multiple wings and a thick, tapered body (with no apparent legs). We also know that the process of being eaten by the Grubfather involves some form of metamorphosis- either of the Grubs, or even the Grubfather itself. You can even hear them making noise within Grubfather, meaning they're not dead (yet. we don't know if they Will Be Eventually).
most of the time "grub" refers to beetle larvae, but... moth larvae can look pretty similar. grubs and caterpillars are often mistaken for one another. the main thing that gets me is the legs- the legs of the caterpillar are typically a lot thicker and better for movement. whereas most grubs have thinner, typically segmented legs and often can barely even move around with them. We see the grubs in hallownest with relatively thick legs- most other bugs in hallownest just get black lines for legs- and they're able to move incredibly freely.
Now- there's a lot of types of bugs in hallownest, which means a large variety of larval stages. We've got moths, obviously, which are caterpillars. We've got mantises, which have no larval stage and instead hatch directly into nymphs (So, the Mantis Youth enemy is likely a nymph). Baldurs are like woodlice, or isopods, meaning intstead of larvae they have manca, which essentially look just like tiny versions of the adult (e.g., the regular Baldur compared to the Elder Baldur). Bee larvae are simple white grubs, which are typically sealed inside of the surrounding honeycomb until they metamorphose. Spiders hatch as spiderlings, which we see plenty of in-game (and, before the Lifeblood update, Deeplings would even actually pop out of eggs when broken).
We have flukes, which seem to moreso resemble maggots, or fly larvae. The tiny flukes we see at the entrance to Flukemarm are clearly the youngest of the larvae (despite the Flukefey being labeled as such in the Hunter's Journal- the larvae in the walls aren't considered an enemy type in the Journal, however, so were likely not considered). Despite the fact that the Flukes more often resemble worms, we know they are not, as some varieties have legs or wings. Annelids (true worms, like earthworms, leeches, etc) never have legs, much less wings. Meaning the flukes are most likely arthropods, and thus most likely are something close to flies.
And then we have creatures that are in completely different phylums to arthropods, such as the jellyfish (cniderians), snails and slugs (molluscs), and mushrooms (fungi. not even in the animalia kingdom).
But by far the most common type of bug in Hallownest are beetles. Beetles are some of the most diverse insects on the planet even in real life, and in Hallownest it's no exception. We see plenty of beetles based on real life- Dung Defender being a dung beetle, the Nailsmith being a rhinoceros beetle, Willoh being a giraffe weevil. Most other insects in hallownest mostly resemble beetles than other insects, with hard, plated shells and often visible elytra (the hard shell casing that covers the wings). Because beetles are so abundant, and because most other insect species in the game tend to keep within their own separated groups, "grub" most likely became the colloquial form of "baby" within Hallownest. Therefore, these Grubs might not even be grubs at all, but another form of insect larvae that was labeled as grub due to its similarity to beetle young.
We never see any direct inclusions of the young of the Moth Tribe nor the various beetles found around hallownest. There is only a single known caterpillar seen in-game, and that is Marmu. It is not known if she is connected to the Moth Tribe or not, however Marmu's design was based on a Puss Moth caterpillar, of which the real-world equivalent grow up to be similarly fluffy moths to the ones seen in the Moth Tribe. The visual similarity between Marmu and the Grubs is striking- and they even sound remarkably similar, meaning they could be of related species.
Now, back to actual Hollow Knight Lore™:
We know that the Collector is definitely related to the Kingsmoulds, as they are both made of void and have the same body template. All Moulds were made as servants to the king, and do not seem to have their own motivations or interests. The Collector, however, definitely has a personality, ranting and raving about how much it loves the Grubs.
The corpse holding the Love Key in Queen's Gardens is a Husk Dandy, or one of the high elite of Hallownest. It was clearly a high-ranking member of society, and may have had some connections with Lurien, or even the Pale King himself. The Tower of Love was most likely this Dandy's tower, and it was likely the one who began the collection of grubs, with the Collector as some form of assistant (thank you mossbag for this one).
Now, the Dandy's Dream Nail dialogue says "Too long spent together... we become as one...". This, paired with the black streaks around the Dandy's eyes as well as the Void particles seen around the corpse, leads most people to assume that the Collector being made of Void somehow started to physically affect the Dandy, leading to its death. But what if it weren't simply one-way? What if, somehow, the Collector started to mirror the Dandy- if the Dandy was enthusiastic enough about its work, then the Collector may have become obsessed as well due to this.
We also know that the Pale King was attempting to snuff out almost everything he could about the Radiance. The Moth Tribe were apparently born from the Radiance, either metaphorically or literally. While the Moth Tribe did reject the Radiance and follow the Pale King, some moths still chose to remember their old god, until, according to the seer, "all of Hallownest began to dream of that forgotten light". Somehow, this hushed worship of the Radiance could have led to the infection taking hold in the world.
From what I could find, it was not entirely clear if any of the Void experiments began before or after the beginning of the Infection. The Collector could have been created any time in between the creation of Hallownest to its fall- it could be an early, perhaps unfinished form of a Kingsmould- it could be a typical Kingsmould that was altered in some way- it could be a late, more adavnced form of Kingsmould with traits unlike the other more typical Kingsmoulds (for example, it has a voice, where seemingly no other Void being does whatsoever).
Another thing to note- it's not made clear what kind of power exactly the Elegy charm draws from. Because of the Grubsong charm's connection to Soul, one might assume it is also Soul energy, however the slash doesn't draw from the Knight's Soul meter and any charms that directly affect spells or Soul use (other than Grubsong) don't have any sort of affect on the Elegy charm when equipped together.
So, my theory:
The Grubs are actually caterpillars, created by the Radiance in her return to Hallownest. The Pale King, or someone underneath him, noticed the appearance of these bugs and decided to study them- that, or they already knew of the bugs' connection to the moths and thus decided to trap them. The Dandy was the one in charge of this, the head researcher who collected and researched them. The Collector was a Kingsmould gifted to the Dandy by Lurien (or even the Pale King himself) to help with research- and perhaps, if they knew about the Radiance connection, also as a form of extra security (The vessels were Void beings created to contain the Radiance. The Collector is a Void being who obsessively contains Grubs. There's a reflection there). The Collector may have even specifically been granted a voice in order to be able to communicate with the Dandy.
Over time, the Dandy and the Collector being around each other so much caused them to start to become one. Not just in the Dandy becoming somehow infected with Void, but also in the Collector's obsession with the Grubs. This ultimately led to the Dandy locking the Collector in the Tower of Love and attempting to run away with the key before succumbing to the Void in the Queen's Gardens.
Being an experiment specifically created by the Pale King and his court, the Collector likely had some form of "programming" by the court to complete its intended tasks. Unlike the Kingsmoulds' simple programming to Defend the Pale King, instead the Collector's would have been to collect or trap bugs. It could have even been the case that the Collector was the Dandy's field agent- going to collect the Grubs itself so as to not put the Dandy in danger. We can even see this in its attacks- it doesn't necessarily slash at you, but instead makes a grabbing motion. Perhaps the Collector was programmed to Contain and Protect, with protect applying both to the Dandy and the collected specimens (a dead grub is no use for research, now is it?). However, now there seems to be some sort of bug in the programming (pun not intended) where the Collector doesn't seem to distinguish between what it should or shouldn't collect- we see bottles of Vengeflies and Aspids and Baldurs, and even the player's Shade, but these are only ever found within the Tower of Love where the Collector is locked away. It's likely it was the Dandy's orders that told the Collector exactly what to collect, and without those it simply overdoes its programmed task.
Unfortunately, the Knight eventually comes along and destroys the entire operation before we can find out the real truths regarding the Grubs. Hopefully the Grubberflies aren't actually tiny Radiances.
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fourspiceblend · 1 year
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It's funny cause for the most part of the game, I didn't really care about people's criticisms of Engage's writing and thought they were just mad the story was straightforward and didn't try to be overly complex... But now that I'm (finally) reaching the endgame, there's a loooot of weird plotholes that 3H would be jealous of lol.
#i think that what bothers me the most is the fact that we don't know how elyos really works#because with a few exceptions the supports don't really go into it#and the paralogues focusing on the emblems and fanservice references to the older games is a huuuuuge missed opportunity#my experience has still been overall positive but the cracks are definitely showing lmao#thinking thoughts#to be fair i do love how unlike 3h we do actually get to see the four nations have their own identity and explore them after a battle#because BOY was 3H lacking in that aspect just because they wanted to sell you a red herring#but there's telling and not showing. and there's showing and not telling. and one isn't necessarily better than the other#i need a bit of both you know#3h doesn't wanna delve too much into the intricacies of each country because the second it would do so#the whole ''da church controls errything'' red herring would fall apart and the devs really don't want that#so we gotta stay in the monastery at all times and since the monastery is in the very small chunk of land the church DOES control#it helps to keep you in the dark about how things really work#even though the storytelling makes it clear the central church barely controls anything and only intervenes when ASKED#meanwhile elyos really really shows you each kingdom with detail when it comes to aesthetics and culture. which is neat!#but we know little to nothing else even though they keep hinting that the kingdoms each work differently#and we know even LESS about lythos which bothers me the most!#and none of this would bother me at all if we didn't have stuff like the brodia/elusia conflicts in the background#or the existence of a fell dragon religion. or fucking gradlon. or the many dragon races. or kagetsu being a prince#or lumera suddenly having a child and everyone going along with it etc
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dirt-str1der · 10 months
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Wrt the previous post i still get so mad about how stupid some people are about that like okay thank you for letting me know you failed basic reading comprehension
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m0e-ru · 2 years
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the gas station attendant social link alternate universe is about the past and the future. it is about accepting you who you were and who you are and who you'll be. accepting every aspect of yourself, intangible and tangible. that maybe you are fractured, broken, fragmented, empty, torn apart, or one thousand different things. but you are there for yourself, whoever that may be. whoever they may be. it is about love and betreyal and kindness and malice and caring and hate. deliberate or accidental. it is about learning and realizing and doing something about it and doing nothing about it. it is about the constant pursuit of knowledge no matter how fun it is no matter how terrifying it is. no matter if it's a genuine drive or something forced unto the self as one is pushed to the ledge. it is about life and death and what is real and what is not. it is about accepting what is there and making the effort to make it different. it is about stagnancy and improvement. it is about being the same and about change. it is about friendships about family about relationships about the inherent love present in all of it. it is about finding yourself in someone and the choice to help the other to help the self. to fill each other's half empty cups and overflow with gratitude or spill out and become an emptiness so unbearable that the irony of a rush of tears come flooding out somehow. it is about potential and the need to pursue it and find it and accomplish it and grow and grow and grow and learn and learn and learn and live and live and live no matter what anyone says. no matter what you say. it is about god. it is about human. it is about the bond with the one god once called its puppet but lives in the role itself no longer can be called an actor. because of love. because of love.
#kommento#sulululat#gsa sl au#// it was my love btw#// thinking that this silly thing is too 'far gone' but it's a fruit tree of so many personal spiels that maybe deep down I brought this#// to the table because I wanted to have people learn about myself? through something we can both love#// but that's just the thing it's become too personal that no one can relate to it and if anyone does it wrong I bite their face off#// I don't know. regressing back into my little bubble and thinking of other problems. being here is a journey and it's still going#// that there's still so much I can do but I'm reaching a tipping point and I can do everything now or drop it all#// like game dev crunch time. spend four years on it and a 1 and a half year chunk to prep for the live demo at the press conference#// and if you flop or show up with nothing the whole project would just be dropped. and there is nothing left#// all that passion and love and effort is washed away#// I don't even know what I'm aiming for. I just wanted a community. and I do have one but am I not satisfied?#// is there a certain sense of community itself that I want? now I'm selfish and picky? I am not sure#// I should make a relationship chart actually. with bubbles and lines and captions and labels or something. peek into my brain diagrams#// three year anniversary coming up soon... but who knows if I'll still be kicking in six more months. it's a surprise 🎉#// gsaslau is about god who is not human and a human who does not believe he is human. and somehow they make each other more human#// it is about a child meant to be the avatar of hope falling to his knees having to accept the truth about the people he trusts#// it is about a girl desperately wanting to save everyone and would offer her life to do so. but she wants to live with everyone else#// without another giving up their own life instead#// it is about a man who rises from despair and becomes the beacon of hope he never thought he could be#// it is about a man who wouldnt believe the emptiness in his heart stings. that he could never lose somethng because he never had anything#// it is about someone who relearns who they were and creates who they're going to be. fighting all the urges to destroy such a creation
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rescuefield-arch1 · 1 year
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but on a somewhat serious note i think that 19yo claire would have loved the whole american dream thing where she has two kids a dog and white picket fence, but that died with her innocence in RC. and as her life got more messy her concept of dream life evolved along - she's got kids, she's got a house she worked so hard to own, she does have romantic relationships here and there - it's not the way she pictured it but it's there and it still matters so much.
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